#the saying you can never go home again is a little too real for seph at this point in the story

[akirakirxaa]

[ day 25 - ruin ]

This was the missing piece she had been searching for - what had happened to her beloved home. She had prayed that it had survived the years, perhaps in some distant corner of the star away from prying eyes and modern maps. But the painted flames told her more than a thousand words or a hundred maps.

Amaurot was gone.

[ masterpost ]

[theladyofdeath]

Life As We Know It {Chapter Two}

Summary: After the sudden deaths of Nesta’s sister and Cassian’s best friend, they gain guardianship of their nephew, Nyx.

Based on Life As We Know It (2010) and a prompt sent in by anonymous for our Nessian fanfic contest. This is a modern au.

Instead of doing a tag list for this story, we have decided to have a set posting schedule. Chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays and Thursdays. Chapters will be posted on both my and Shelby's blogs! >> @snelbz​

Life As We Know It Masterlist

Shelby's Masterlist

Tara's Masterlist

Trigger warning: death

The vibrations beneath her pillow had nearly stopped by the time Nesta dug it out and held it up to her ear.

“Hell-hello?” she asked, barely able to keep her eyes open, barely able to get the words out.

Her eyes adjusted as she sat up and looked at the alarm clock on Feyre and Rhysand’s bedside table.

1:26 a.m.

“Is this Nesta Archeron?” a quiet, female voice asked.

It was the tone that got Nesta. 

It was the tone that had her sitting up straight, her heart slowing in her chest. “Yes, this is Nesta.”

“Nesta, this is Claire from Velaris Hospital,” she began. “There’s been an accident-.”

It was all she heard.

After that, everything became blurred and the words that Claire spoke made absolutely no sense at all.

Rhys and Feyre were supposed to be home the following evening, the last she’d heard from her sister, she and Rhys were going to dinner and then out dancing before heading back up to the cabin.

That had been a little before eight, almost six hours ago. She could hear the rain coming down, much harder than it had been when she’d gone to bed, even a few hours before. Nyx had been asleep by seven, only waking up to cry once or twice a night the whole time she’d been watching him. All in all, the weekend had been uneventful, but she was ready for Rhys and Feyre to be home, so she could go home to her townhouse, to peace and quiet and blessed, blessed silence.

But as she quickly tucked Nyx into his car seat, doing her best not to wake the sleeping baby up, she tried not to think about the phone call. She tried not to think about the firm, but steady tone of voice as she drove across town, to the hospital. 

She had been to the hospital before.

Twice in the last fifteen years.

Once when her mother passed, once her sickness finally took her.

And once again when their father passed over complications from his heart surgery.

Nesta hated that drive, hated pulling into the hospital’s parking lot. She didn’t trust it, not one bit. She hated it. Hated the ground on which it stood.

As she parked her car in front of the building, she looked in the rearview mirror. Nyx was still fast asleep, completely unaware of what was happening, completely unaware of the phone call that had just occurred only half an hour before.

There’s been an accident.

Nesta got out of the car. She shut the driver’s side and went to the back. She carefully unbuckled Nyx from his carseat and picked him up, holding him tightly against her chest as she covered him with his oldest, softest, favorite blanket. 

The parking lot was nearly empty.

Nesta carried Nyx inside.

You need to come quickly.

She found Azriel by the doors leading deeper into the hospital, calling out his name as soon as she saw him. He turned, and she nearly froze at the look on his face, the paleness and hollow look in his eyes. But she couldn’t and she hurried to where he stood, with a stone-faced doctor.

We did everything we could.

The next few minutes were a blur of explanations and condolences, but Nesta could do nothing but hold onto Nyx, still sleeping soundly in her arms. She hadn’t even realized she was crying until Azriel slid an arm around her shoulders, offering her what little comfort he could.

They’re gone.

*

They had been driving back to the cabin when the storm had hit. Both of them had been drinking, but not enough to even break the blood alcohol level. The winding roads leading up into the mountains quickly grew slick and when they hydroplaned, Rhys had lost control of the car.

With how hard it was coming down, he hadn’t even seen the ledge coming up, or how far the drop was to the bottom of the ravine.

Nesta prayed that wherever they had gone after their final breath that they were together.

And that Rhysand wouldn’t be blaming himself.

It wasn’t his fault.

She repeated that prayer one after the other until she had begun to doze in and out of sleep.

When she woke, it was nearly five in the morning.

Nyx had slept through it all, hadn’t even realized what had happened. When they got home, Nesta had laid him in his crib, where he had remained, sleeping soundly, ever since.

4:56 a.m.

Nesta had managed to sleep for nearly forty-five minutes.

That in itself was a blessing.

Yet, as she threw her legs over the side of the bed, Nesta felt guilty. How could she sleep after the news she had just received?

None of it seemed real.

Her little sister, her youngest sister.

Dead.

All that was left of their family was her and Elain. 

Her, and Elain, and Nyx, and Seph.

Dad. Mom. Feyre.

Gone.

Nesta stumbled into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. She didn’t feel a thing. After turning the faucet on, letting the cold water run for a minute, she splashed some on her face.

It didn’t bring her back to reality like she was hoping for.

She was hoping it was all a dream.

But it wasn’t.

Her legs carried her into Nyx’s nursery, where she sat for the next couple of hours, watching him sleep, peacefully. Not knowing, not realizing, not understanding his parents were never coming home.

She heard the front door open around seven-thirty, rushing down the stairs, praying that she had, in fact, dreamed it all and Rhys and Feyre would be coming inside, home a few hours early.

But it wasn’t Rhys, or Feyre. Instead, it was another familiar head of golden-brown hair, her eyes trained in the hardwood just inside the walkway. The door had barely closed before Nesta made it down the stairs and wrapped her arms around Elain.

They both collapsed, falling to their knees on the worn rug, as Elain sobbed into her sister’s shoulder.

*

The following days were a blur. A constant stream of people calling, texting, reaching out to see what could be done. Nesta and Elain handled the arrangements, with Azriel’s help, but none of them realized how prepared Feyre and Rhys had been for their own deaths.

Maybe it was because they’d both lost their parents young. Maybe it was because they didn’t want Nyx to ever have to deal with it on his own. All Nesta had to do was sign some paperwork and present their death certificates.

The funeral home had taken it from there.

She sat in the corner of the room, wearing a simple black dress that Feyre had always told her looked matronly on anyone else, but made her look like a badass CEO. It was one of her favorites. She figured Feyre would have wanted her to wear it today.

She hadn’t been able to bring herself to look into the caskets yet, to see what her sister and brother-in-law looked like, if they even looked like themselves.

She’d never be able to wipe the memory of their pale, lifeless bodies from her mind, as she and Azriel had to confirm that it was them in the hospital. Until that moment, she’d held out hope that maybe they had been wrong. That maybe someone had stolen their car and they were waiting at the bar for the rain to die down.

But even in death she couldn’t mistake their faces.

She couldn’t imagine that they looked anything like they once did, knowing that she’d never see Feyre’s bright smile or amusement sparking in Rhysand’s eyes.

The funeral dragged on, a preacher they had grown up with leading the crowd that had gathered. Nesta was asked if she wanted to say something, but she didn’t. What was there to say? There was too much to say. 

Nesta couldn’t.

So, she didn’t.

They carried the caskets out and loaded them up in the hearses. 

Nesta didn’t remember getting behind the wheel, didn’t remember loading Nyx into his carseat, didn’t remember driving to the cemetery.

And yet, she ended up standing in front of a set of holes in the ground with Nyx on her hip. Only a few words were said before the caskets were lowered into the ground.

Nesta wondered what was going through Nyx’s head. The one-year-old didn’t make a sound, not a peep as the day went on. He simply remained perfectly calm, his head resting on Nesta’s shoulder as she swayed back and forth.

“I can take him, if you want to say goodbye.”

Nesta spun around, meeting the eyes of Cassian Nazari.

He’d been crying, she could tell. If it wasn’t for the redness in his puffy eyes, Nesta surely would have snapped.

“There’s no need,” Nesta said, with an empty calmness. “I’ve already said my goodbyes.”

It was a lie, of course.

Could you ever really say goodbye to someone you loved?

He didn’t push her, just silently stepped up next to her and stared at the mounds of dirt. Nearly everyone was gone, Azriel taking a silent, distant Elain home. Mor, Emerie, Gwyn, Amren, and Varian had left just a few minutes after them. The only ones still present were those who had filled the graves, the preacher, saying a few final prayers for peace, and the three of them.

“I don’t…” His voice was rough, in a way she’d never heard it. “I keep waiting for him to call me and tell me it’s all dumbass prank,” he breathed. “That this was all some elaborate joke to get back at me for something.”

Nesta nodded, understanding. She blinked, but was unable to stop the few silent tears from sliding down her cheeks. She didn’t know what to say, but for once she agreed with Cassian.

“If you, uh, need anything…” Cassian began, before shaking his head and taking a deep breath. “If you need anything just give me a call.”

Nesta nodded once. She knew he was just saying it out of kindness due to the situation, but she supposed it was still a kind offer.

“I’ll be fine,” she said, after a moment had passed. Without giving Cassian another glance, she was turning toward her car, walking away.

Her legs became heavier with each step she took, but she continued onward until she was sitting behind the wheel of her little black car, Nyx buckled into his carseat.

He began to fuss.

Nesta understood.

Maybe he was beginning to realize that his mom and dad were never coming back.

As Nesta drove back toward the house, her vision blurred as the tears came.

*

The next few days passed by slowly. She and Nyx made it just fine, but the time seemed to drag on and on and on.

She had just put Nyx down for his afternoon nap when her phone began to ring, a number she didn’t recognize showing up on her screen.

She hesitated for a moment, not sure if she could handle another one of Rhys or Feyre’s friends offering their condolences. Their pity.

Ultimately, she grabbed her phone, swiping across the screen to answer the call.

“Nesta Archeron speaking.”

A smooth voice came from the other end of the line. “Ms. Archeron, my name is Tarquin Hadrian.”

She paused. The name didn’t seem familiar, so she cleared her throat. “How can I help you, Mr. Hadrian?”

“I’m terribly sorry for your loss, Ms. Archeron,” he began. Nesta sighed quietly, waiting for the words to continue, but he said something she wasn’t expecting. “I’m the Lunasa’s attorney. I was hoping to speak with you about their will.”

Shit. Nesta hadn’t even thought about a will, hadn’t thought about any of the plans Rhys and Feyre had made. If they’d planned everything, down to their burials and graves, surely they had prepared a last will and testament. “Of- Of course.”

“Are you free this afternoon?” He asked. “I know it’s short notice, but I’d wanted to give your family as much time as possible to grieve, however, there are some matters that need to be handled sooner rather than later.”

“Yes, I can be there any time,” she said, looking at the clock. Nyx wouldn’t be up from his nap for another hour or so, but she could figure something out. “When would you prefer?”

“Is three o’clock okay?”

After Nesta’s agreement, he was giving her the address to his office and the call was over and Nesta was calling Elain, asking to drop Nyx off on her way over. She didn’t want to wake him, nor did she think a meeting with a lawyer was a good place for a one-year-old.

An hour later, she was pulling into the parking lot of the small law office, and she froze in her car when she spied a familiar truck across the lot.

What in the hell was he doing here?

Nesta made her way inside, letting the pretty receptionist know who she was here to see and she was escorted back to a plush office.

Cassian already waited inside, sitting across the desk from a handsome, dark-skinned man.

“Ms. Archeron,” he said, standing, extending a hand. Nesta shook it with her own. She didn’t miss that Cassian merely sat there as she entered. “Thank you for meeting with me.”

“Of course,” she nodded, taking the seat next to Cassian. Neither of them acknowledged the other, which was for the best.

There was a large stack of papers on Tarquin’s desk and as he sat, he began to lead through them one by one. Sighing, he laid his hands atop the papers.

“I’m going to cut right to the chase here,” he said. “Did Feyre or Rhys talk with either of you about what should happen to Nyx in the event that both of them should die?”

A glance at each other, but they both shook their heads. Cassian said, “No.”

Another deep breath. “They...named the two of you.”

His blue eyes looked between them, and it took Nesta a moment to realize he wasn’t just speaking to her. Just as long as it took Cassian to realize the same.

As one, they both leaned forward, Nesta resting her hands on the desk, Cassian letting his elbows fall in his knees. Nesta said, “They picked us together?” at the same time Cassian asked, “I’m sorry, what?”

Tarquin cleared his throat. “I tried to advise them against it. An unmarried couple, with your own personal history…”

“I don’t understand,” Nesta said, shaking her head. “I…don’t understand.”

“Yeah, me either,” Cassian added.

“Here,” Tarquin said, handing the two of them a letter.

Neither of them reached for it, but Tarquin didn’t back down. He held out the piece of paper until Nesta snatched it and opened it up.

Cassian hovered over her as she read.

Cassian and Nesta,

We are writing this letter in case of a tragedy. Of course, we don’t expect a tragedy to happen, but you never know.

In case something does happen, you’re to take custody of Nyx. Both of you. We know you two don’t get along, but if something were to happen to us, we need you. You see, we want Nyx to have a mom and a dad. We want him to have two people who love and support him no matter what.

There’s a reason we chose you both to be godparents.

Nesta, you have a heart bigger than anyone we’ve ever met, even though you don’t often show it. When you care about someone, you care about them wholeheartedly. You devote your life to them. You make them feel loved, make them feel wanted, make them feel protected. And we know you care about Nyx.

Cass, you love more fiercely than anyone we have ever known. You were dealt a poor hand as a child, and instead of making you bitter, it made you stronger. It made you realize how you want others to be treated, instead of the opposite. You would make an incredible father. Therefore, we made you godfather.

The two of you are opposite halves of the same coin. One of you cannot succeed without the other, even though you’d both probably argue against that statement.

Look.

If you’re reading this, it means that something awful has happened. If you’re reading this, it means that we are gone. And, if we are gone, Nyx needs someone. He needs his godparents.

We know you’re scared. We know you’re heartbroken. But, if you love us, the two of you will work together to create a family-like environment for Nyx.

We love you both.

We believe in you both.

Tell Nyx we love him, too. So damn much.

Rhysand and Feyre

Nesta’s hands shook as she lowered the letter. “We… The two of us can’t… We can barely be in the same room as each other, much less take care of a child.”

“As I said, I advised them against this, especially once they explained your personal history to me,” Tarquin said, leaning back in his chair. He laid a hand atop the paper on his desk again. “As I mentioned before, they were very thorough in their planning, even going so far as to put a sum of a portion of their life insurance to pay off the mortgage of their home. They’ve left it to the two of you as well, to ensure Nyx has the easiest time possible. No on and off weekends, no moving back and forth.”

Nesta was still processing his words, when Cassian asked, “Wait, so we’re supposed to live together? Not only take care of him, which I’ll do anyways, but live in the same house?”

With a blink, Nesta looked at him. “You’ll take care of him? I’ve been taking care of him for over a week now.”

“Well, he’s my responsibility, too,” he replied, practically snarling at her. “I’m not going to disrespect Rhys’s wishes by shirking it off on someone else.”

Nesta was about to say something else, was ready to snap, but Tarquin cut her off. “It was my duty to give you the letter, per their will. What you do with it is up to you.”

Nesta left twenty minutes later, ready to set the entire city on fire. She burst out the front doors but didn’t leave alone. Cassian was just behind her, right on her heels, calling her name.

“I’m his godfather and I’m not letting Rhys down,” he said. 

She wasn’t backing down, either. “You realize this isn’t a part time job, right? This is a lifetime commitment, Cassian-.”

“You think I don’t know that?” He asked, stopping in front of her. He paused and blinked, as if he’d just realized she didn’t have him with her. “Where is he?”

She scoffed. “With Elain and Seph. I didn’t want to bring him because I wasn’t sure what this meeting would entail. He’d just gone down for a nap and I didn’t want to mess his schedule up.”

She watched as the words registered, watched as he processed them. He probably didn’t even know Nyx had a nap schedule, and he sure as hell didn’t know what it was.

Nevermind the fact that she hadn’t known it the week before, when Feyre had explained it to her before they’d left. Before they’d-.

Tears stung her eyes, trying to spill over as they always did when she thought about her sister, about Rhys. The fire inside her, the will to fight with Cassian, disappeared almost immediately.

“I need to go get him,” she said, adjusting the purse strap on her shoulder, stepping off the curb towards her car.

Cassian didn’t follow her, and when she pulled out of the parking lot, he was still standing in front of the law offices, looking as lost as she felt.

[secret-engima]

Heyheyhey two things; Seer!Cloud Strife, who wakes Vincent up like, when he's six/five because of what he /saw./ or sky!Cloud that happens to awaken Vincent from his sleep 'cuz sky attraction. (Sephs mum was a sky?? Vincent was 'flame courting' her??) (I JUST WANT PROTECTIVE VINCENT, OKAY? I LOVE HIM.)

Oooooo hmmm tricky. Gonna focus on Seer!Cloud because that’s real interesting-.

Real quick on Sky!Cloud tho: that would be such a chaotic combo. Sky!Cloud in all his feral glory and wild instincts (because Flames are forgotten, secret things in most “civilized” places but Nibelheim is not what one would really call “civilized” in that way so Flames are still a thing) senses a powerful Flame in the mansion and is curious. And he doesn’t want to court the kids his age who have flickers of fire, because they are too weak still and he will smother them on accident (like he nearly did with Tifa, but it’s not her fault, her Flame is young and not Blessed like Cloud’s with Destiny, so it does not roar like a bonfire yet even though it will in time). So he gathers himself and marches to the mansion to find this big Flame, and Vincent is yanked out of sleep when his own Cloud Flames howl at the feel of a young, powerful Sky fighting and fearing the mansion’s monsters above his head. Vincent is moving before he is aware of it, rushing up the stairs on pure, feral instinct that he has tried to hard to bury since losing Lucrecia at the cusp of finalizing their bond, and he-

Arrives. Snatches up the child in one arm while the other fires his gun and obliterates any monster nearby. The child latches on, scared and desperate and longing-

There is a click and a jolt and Vincent keens in a heady mix of guilt-relief-shock-pain at the sudden snap bond. Because he promised he would only love one Sky and she turned her back on him, yet now there is another, younger Sky would understands his soul and bonds with it instantly, before they even know each other’s names, and it HURTS but it is also a RELIEF.

And that is how bby Sky Cloud got the most monstrously protective Turk Cloud Vincent ever. XD

Canon goes yeet. There’s no way Vincent is letting Cloud anywhere near Shinra unprepared, and no WAY he’s letting Cloud get pumped full of drugs in this “Soldier” program led by Hojo. Vincent’s just: welp time to kill the mad scientist that hurt me. And then he finds Sephiroth and he’s like !!!!!!! because he can feel Lucrecia’s Flame signature in Sephiroth’s and Cloud blinks a few times and then is like: oh. Friend? Son of Friend? Okay. My Mist now.

Everything gets more chaotic from there with Cloud casually picking up Soldier and Turk Flames left and right without anyone able to stop him because his Cloud is Vincent and his Mist is SEPHIROTH.

...

Cloud is a not a strong baby when he is born. He is not a healthy one. He is small and fragile and Nibelheim is not kind.

But Cloud’s mother remembers the Old Things and she is desperate and stubborn. So when other mothers would have just accepted the doctor’s grim declaration that Cloud would likely not last to his third month of life, Claudia wrapped him up in every warm layer she could and sets off up the mountain.

She finds the mako spring up there and kneels before it and begs. Begs any who would listen to please, save her child, lend him strength.

The Lifestream hears the cries of a mother, the thready life of a soul that could-be-has-been-one-was their champion in a hundred-thousand other timelines and takes pity. Light reaches up and curls around the whimpering child and a hundred-thousand voices sing softly of healing and Blessing. But such things are not free, and since Claudia is not the one to receive the healing, she is not the one who pays the price (and it is not fair, to make a child pay for the plea of the parent, but the Lifestream is not fair, it just Is, and this is how it has always claimed its dues). Cloud takes a breath and wails, strong and loud in a way he has never been before and Claudia weeps with relief.

She weeps again, later, when she realizes her son’s eyes do not track her movement. When she realizes that he is blind.

(He is not really blind, they learn later, he just sees too much. His gaze is always locked on the future, and every time he opens his eyes he sees a thousand pathways to what-might-be-what-could-be-what-needs-be. He sees people and places, tragedies and joys, laughter and tears and fates not yet woven into place. With all that to look at, is it any wonder he cannot process the present that is right in front of him? It is already a wonder he does not go mad in his first years of life).

Claudia learns to hide Cloud’s eyes and help with his blindness, and Cloud learns to not open his eyes even while awake if he does not want to lose himself. But even with his eyes shut, things whisper behind his eyelids. Not the far future and all its possibilities, but just the near future, the split second decisions that his mind can see minutes ahead of time and choose between. It makes him light on his feet and strange in his words and deeds. The townspeople think he’s Off and they do not like their children playing with him (though some, like Tifa, play with him anyway).

Cloud warns Tifa not to go up the mountain after her mother dies, but she does not listen. He follows her up and tears slide past his closed eyelids as he runs. He is just in time to banish the paths that end in Tifa sprawled out at the base of the high mountainside with a shattered neck. He grabs her hand and brings her back home, but the townsfolk do not like him. They blame him. They tell him to stay away. And Cloud opens his eyes for just a moment when the voices get too close and sees a rush of near-far-unlikely-likely and he cannot tell which it is when he sees paths that lead to the townsfolk hurting him and so he runs away. He slams his eyes shut because he cannot flee if he is too far in the future to remember how to run, but even so the Lifestream curls and twists around him and for a moment, one unlikely path rises to the surface and Cloud SEES.

A friend.

A father.

He turns and instead of running home, he runs for the old Shinra mansion.

He almost dies to the monsters, but his instincts are sharp even with his eyes shut, and though he has never SEEN the world like regular people do, he knows where he is going as he runs down the stairs and flings himself down into the room of coffins with half a dozen monsters on his heels. He crashes against the side of one and screams, “Vincent, help!” and in his voice the Lifestream echoes and yanks and demands just like it does those rare times he opens his mouth and frightens his mother with the disjointed prophecies of Future that spill out.

Chaos roars in Vincent’s head, driving him up and out of his coffin to protect the Little Seer and when Vincent next blinks, he’s standing for the first time in years, there are monsters dead at his feet, and a child sobbing in terror against his leg.

Vincent is confused.

He looks down at the child sobbing past closed eyes and ... doesn’t know what to do. If it were an adult he wouldn’t care, but this is a little KID. Who somehow knew his name. Vincent crouches and forces his rusty voice to ask, “Who are you? What are you doing down here?”

“I came to f-find you,” sobs the child.

“How did you know I was here?”

The child sniffles, clinging to the fabric of Vincent’s cloak and opens his mouth.

The Lifestream’s prophecy spills out “Mourner in Red with no son of his own. Sleeper in Guilt while the world falls to ruin will always awaken and follow when the Cloud calls covers his coffin.” The boy’s mouth snaps shut a moment later with a strangled sound, like he’s choking on more words, and Vincent is an Alarm.

No child says things like that normally. No child SOUNDS like that. Like he is both normal yet not, like when he speaks the world is whispering alongside and giving it an echo of thunder. Chaos stirs in his head, but instead of trying to take over, it just laughs, dark and old and bloody, “So a new seer has been chosen,” it sneers, “I thought Minerva would cease that practice after the death of the last ones.”

Last ones? Vincent thinks uneasily at the more talkative of the monsters in his head.

“People are fickle creatures. Every seer that has lived is either scorned and disbelieved, or revered and isolated. They are either shams or gods in the eyes of other mortals, and their wisdom is both rejected and clung to. With a connection as strong as his that it takes his normal sight, he will either be forced to speak of the futures people desire and then be killed when a different future comes to pass, or he will be shunned and locked away by ‘wiser’ minds who deem him mad.”

Vincent can feel his insides turn cold. And it shouldn’t matter. He is too broken to help in such things and yet-.

The child knew him.

The child knew his name, trusted whatever he saw in the futures unwritten that he came to Vincent for help.

Just long enough to get him home, Vincent promises himself as he awkwardly picks up the child and carries him out of the mansion and into the town. Then I will return.

Except the boy’s mother finds him and she cries in relief and somehow her tears of thanks lead to dragging him home because the boy refuses to let go of him and the woman (Claudia) is very kind and the boy is clingy and the food is warm and-.

And somehow. Despite all his intentions. Vincent stays.

[hadestownmodern]

Whole Foods and Grilled Cheese

You got Eurydice and Persephone at Costco. Here is the prelude to that: Orpheus and Hades at Whole Foods. This was such a wild thing to write and I hope it brings someone a bit of a smile in these hard times. -A

The bustling of the grocery store was not a welcome sight to Orpheus who had not expected the action filled morning when he called his uncle the previous night. 

“She’s been staying a lot..”

“Orpheus, I don’t want to know about your late night antics with that girl-”

“No no thats not- I’m not trying to talk about that!” Orpheus stuttered though he knew his blush was not evidence through the telephone. “She doesn’t eat well and she works so much- I wanted to try to make her some things.”

“Make her some things?”

“I want to learn to cook. Can you help me?”

“....” Silence, so Hades could hide the slight pride in his voice. “I’ll be there in the morning.”

The 8 a.m. knock on his apartment door, with his uncle demanding to get going for a ‘long day ahead’ had not been what he was anticipating when he rolled out of bed scrambling for pajama pants. 

The morning was nothing short of exhausting. Hades dragging Orpheus through the busy streets to a high end department store and making a beeline for the kitchen department. A long lecture on different pots, pans, and cooking utensils ended with Hades buying ‘one of everything’ and having it promptly delivered to Orpheus apartment so they could continue on their day. 

By afternoon, after Hades spent a small fortune to equip Orpheus with “the best of the best” for cooking, he would not relax on the ride to the local Whole Foods. 

“Amma says you should buy from Farmer’s markets…” Orpheus had commented, between drinks of a free sample smoothie that was a rather unsettling shade of green. 

Hades tried to hold back the sharp retort, biting his tongue and gesturing Orpheus forward in the store. “You can go to the farmers market once you have pantry staples, Orpheus. But you need a solid base. Spices, rice, pastas, flour.. Spices especially. Eventually you can make most of it yourself. You can make broth and pasta but for now, we’re starting easy. You need a solid start. A pasta dish, a chicken dish, some sort of eggs.. We’ll get to soup later. We’ll cover steak next week.”

“Next week?” Orpheus squeaks, eyes wide at the assortment of fruits and vegetables around him. His fingers lingered on star fruit a few extra moments before Hades deep voice pulled him out of his reverie.

“Yes, Next Week, do you want to impress the girl or not?” Hades is perusing a meat case, conversing with the butcher in words Orpheus cannot comprehend, taking brown paper wrapped packages and placing them in the cart. “We’ll start easy today. Scrambled eggs. Maybe a nice red sauce. Simple things…. What can you make now?”

“I can...heat up frozen chicken nuggets. And make grilled cheese! With tomato Soup!”

“Is the tomato soup from a can, Orpheus?” He isn’t even looking at him as he examines a dozen of eggs and places them in the shopping cart as well, before grabbing a few cheeses. 

“...yes…”

“Then thats not cooking. What kind of cheese do you put on the grilled cheese?”  

“The little slices that come wrapped one by one-”

“Thats not even real cheese. Okay. No red sauce today. Eggs. We do eggs.” He loops back to grab an extra dozen.

Hades directs Orpheus through each aisle, taking time to pause and teach Orpheus about all the possibilities. Different types of pasta for different sauces (Light sauce with spaghetti, bolognese with rigatoni), types of beans to use for different fillings, how different flours affected baked goods. 

They were in the spice aisle, a deep discussion on the values of garlic salt versus garlic powder when Orpheus asked a new question. 

“So you need garlic and onion powder, but can add your own salt. I really suggest you use real garlic and onion but on grilled cheese or eggs this is easier. I also think freshly cracked black pepper makes a difference-”

“When did you know you wanted to marry Persephone?” He asks, looking up from his notebook full of spice notes. 

“...not after six days, Boy, back to the spice. Now bay leaves are quintessential to a good soup base..”

“I bought a ring!”

“And you should use real homemade broth, Persephone used those bouillon cubes as a nausea quick cure but- I’m sorry you did what?”

“I bought a ring! Yesterday. I love her so much, I just..I know she’s it for me. Amma always says you know and I know!” He has an innocence in his eyes that Hades doesn’t want to crush, but innocence too closely accompanies naivety. 

“Orpheus. You met six days ago. You don’t marry a girl because she took your virginity!”

Orpheus’ face turned the color of the canned tomatoes in his hand, the poet losing his words. “No! I love her! I know I do! She makes the world have color and reason and I look at her and see the whole world. I just imagine waking up next to her and holding our babies and-”

“Six days. Six days ago. You met her six days ago, stop talking about babies and marriage and focus on, I don’t know, getting to no her as a person with clothes on?” He grabs a handful of jarred spices and pushed on through the store. “Two years, Orpheus. We were together two years before I even thought about it. Now come on, we need to start cooking.” He ended the conversation, gesturing Orpheus towards the checkout. 

They stopped at his apartment to drop off and properly store the frozen ingredients, a lesson all in its own of proper pantry filling and food storage, before taking the car to Hades townhome, where Orpheus was already spending so much of his time. 

“We’ll do Eggs and grilled cheese. Scrambled eggs, you can’t do an omlette yet.” Hades decided as he keys into the front door, grabbing the mail on his way in. 

“Is seph home? Is she gonna try it-”

“Of course. You don’t have to impress her though. Even if it tasted like garbage, that woman would never hurt your feelings. It’s Junie you need to impress-”

“..Junie?”

Just then Hades pushes the door open, and within seconds tiny yet quick footsteps were audible, getting closer by the second. 

Junie, in her little purple tutu, ringlet curls bouncing as she ran, flew into her father’s legs with her arms in the air. “Daddy! I miss-ed-ed you!” 

He chuckles lowly, scooping her onto his hip and kissing her cheek as the toddler wrapped her arms around his neck. “Hey, Princess. Where’s your mother?” 

“If she’s the princess, does that make me the queen?” Persephone appears, long curls falling loose around her face. She somehow looks put together even in a sweatshirt far too big for her and flannel pajama shorts left over from last years christmas. “How was your shopping trip?”

He kisses his wife, tugging her closer by the fabric of her shirt. “You were the queen long before she was the princess. And it was eventful. He uses prepackaged cheese.”

“Well, I ate cups of ramen noodles and you loved me anyway.” Persephone winks, holding a hand out to Orpheus. “I hope he didn’t scare you, it’s sweet, that you’re learning to do this.”

“Well I want to be with her forev-”

He is interrupted by Hades voice, as he bounces Junie once “Hey Junie, why don’t we go set up to cook. Come, Orpheus.”

“Yeah, come on Ophie!” Junie gestures for him to follow, as her father carries her to the kitchen. He sits her on the chair at the island, before Persephone sits beside her and pulls her into her lap. 

“Why’s Ophie cookin’ daddy?” She asks, kicking her little legs before pressing her back into her mother’s chest, snuggling into her. 

“Because he’s trying to impress a girl, Junie.” Hades says off handedly, placing a loaf of bread on the table top. “Remember, Junie, if a man can’t cook, he isn’t good enough for you.”

“Noone’s good ‘nuff for me, Daddy.”

“Thats right, baby. Thats right.”

“Are you tryna impress Princess Rydice, Ophie?” The little girl asks, craning her head to look at him, standing in the doorway looking suddenly horrified. 

“Oh, Yes I am Junie, I love her so much and I want to make her happy!” He has a dreamy look in his eyes, looking off in admiration. 

“Are you gonna marry her?” Junie inquires, cocking her head.

“I want to, so badly!”

“Now Orpheus, we talked about this-” Hades grumbled before his wife cuts him off. 

“What are you making us tonight, my little culinary masters.” Persephone teases, resting her chin on Junie’s head. “I’m in the mood for glazed salmon with-”

“Eggs. We are making eggs. And grilled Cheese.” Hades shoots her a look, signifying that even this may result in ordering takeout late in the evening. He grabs butter and an assortment of cheeses, a carton of eggs, and some other small ingredients. 

“Thats not a real meal, daddy. Wheres the veggie?” Junie questions, resting her little face on her hand. 

“Orpheus has to learn not to burn his house down before we can teach him to blanch veggies, baby.” Hades shakes his head, but hands Junie a handful of grated cheese to munch on in the cooking process. 

Orpheus looks stunned as an egg is placed in his hand, and a small glass bowl is given to him. “Do i just..”

“Crack the egg Orpheus.”

Orpheus slams the egg into the bowl, shell going everywhere in both the yolk and on the counter top. “Oh..”

“Try again.” 

They do this half a dozen times before Orpheus can confidently crack an egg, and learns whisking skills with a fork. He learns to add milk and butter, salt and pepper. He burns the first try, and under cooks the second. The third try is plated, and slid across the island to Junie and her mother. 

Persephone gives Junie a bite before taking one herself. Persephone, either being overly kind or with overly low standards, gives orpheus a thumbs up. 

Junie, however, stares at the pale eggs and shakes her head. “Ophie you aren’t impressin’ any-body with this. You need salt.”

“Juniper! Be nice!” Persephone lectured, but hid her face in her corkscrew curls to laugh to herself. 

“I just telling the truth! It’s bland!” Junie defends, looking to her dad. 

“She’s not wrong..Just use a little more salt and you’ll be golden Orpheus. Eat your eggs then we’ll try the grilled cheese.” 

The grilled cheese does not go any better. 

“For the love of god Orpheus, you put the buttered side on the pan, and the cheese on the inside!” 

“He’s hopeless, Daddy.” Junie pokes in, eating the still uncooked cheese set out on the island. “ Rydice will marry you anyway Ophie, it’s okay if you can’t cook! Mama can’t cook either!”

“I made you, thats close enough to cooking.”  Persephone teased, poking Junie’s stomach and making her erupt into brilliant giggles. 

Orpheus is distracted by the sound, suddenly drawn to a future where it is a dark haired little girl laughing in the arms of Eurydice as he cooks a meal for his own family.  He is so distracted by the thought of Eurydice’s dark eyes on a child that he doesn’t hear Hades in the background. 

“Orpheus...Orpheus...ORPHEUS you are BURNING the toast.” He takes the spatula out of Orpheus’ hand and tosses the offending blackened sandwich away. 

“I’m sorry i’m usually not this bad...I don’t burn my own grilled cheese.”

“Because you use fake cheese. Now remember. Butter bread. Butter side down. Gruyere. Cheddar. Mozzarella. Bread Butter side up.” 

Orpheus follows the instructions, and this time, successfully develops a golden crust on the bread, with cheese oozing out just right. 

He cuts the sandwich in half and presents it to his niece/pseudo sister with pride. “Here you go Junie B.”

Junie eyes him carefully, examining all of the sandwich. “Pretty color..smells good…” She takes an apprehensive bite, then another. “It’s good, Ophie...but..”

“Whats wrong, Junie?” Hades muses, leaning down to her eye level. 

“If you were on chopped, you’d be chopped. But thats okay. My Daddy’s just better than you.” 

[joyfulsongbird]

“Eurydice finds out she's pregnant after going to hadestown and Persephone makes hades let her go back to Orpheus.”

🦥 anon, it wouldn’t let me post it as a reply to an ask so here we go: I meant this to be short but 5000+ words burst from my fingertips so here you go.

I had to change it slightly so that Eurydice has the baby BEFORE Seph gets back (assuming she’s about one to two months pregnant, which wouldn’t be showing yet, when she goes to hadestown) cause Seph leaves and doesn’t come back for six months.

***

work, work, work

constant, pulling, weight on her shoulders, never ending

gods, she’s tired

so tired

she’s never been this tired before

will it ever end?

la la la la la la la

two voices, so many souls. her mouth is closed and she’s screaming, echoing, crying.

and then the bell, the signal that this is not never ending. that work doesn’t last to the end of time, that Hadestown has some mercy for it’s workers. for the people who cry at the foot of the wall every day, except now they are tearing it down. and they cry, they cry, they cry for all of the blood and sweat that went into building and now their tears sink into the mortar, slowly tearing down what they dedicated their life to. what they believed would save them from poverty. and now mister Hades, every morning, reminds them that the wall must come down. that someday, they will see the sunshine again. he doesn’t speak in that hopeful tone, of course not, but Eurydice hears it.

she hears it and hopes. she hears that he is reaching for them with this withered outstretched hand that hasn’t known mercy for so long, and she’s taking it. and saying “this is what it’s like to be merciful”.

look me in the eyes and see what it is to forgive.

for she knows forgiveness like the back of her hand. she knows forgiveness like the deepness of his eyes. knows forgiveness like that the pit of hunger in her stomach. she knows forgiveness. he does not. she can teach him, she can teach him. teach them. It’s only been about two or three months since Persephone went back for spring, it could be longer than that, could be shorter. what is time in Hadestown? there is only the toll and the wall and the crumbling of what they lived for.

she drops her hands to her sides, still coated in grime, her body aching to stretch her hands towards the sky (well, what they call the sky, it isn’t that, it is red and dark and unforgiving). it’s under her fingernails, it’s in her hair, it’s on her cheeks. she is a full fledged creature, with mud on her body like camouflage. she is a machine, work, move, clean, again. what is cleanliness if you are just going to get dirty again tomorrow?

and what is germs in Hadestown? there is no sickness here. that’s what they were promised. a warm place of wealth and no pain. they don’t get sick, they don’t get cold, they don’t go hungry. that’s what was promised to them. but she can’t feel anymore. yes, now she can remember his face, remember his voice, but now... now she feels nothing when she sees his face.

it’s definitely worse.

it’s like she’s looking at the face of a boy she saw in passing on the street. she knows that she loved him, that she still loves him. but there is nothing in her memories that twinges her feelings back into what they were. she sees everything through her own gaze, she knows that at some point she felt these emotions that were so extreme that she cried real tears, that she laughed with this joyousness that filled the entire room. she remembers how he looked at her. with reverence. with love. how he smiled every time she entered a room, and she smiled too. she knows that she smiled too, she remembers that.

she goes through her routines, goes to her shared apartment flat with two other women. they never really speak, they don’t even make eye contact most of time. Eurydice just taps her foot against the floor, waiting for her turn in the shower. directly across the wall, one of her roommates, Afra, stands there. doing the same thing; waiting, listening, all impatiently. Eurydice doesn’t know her well, doesn’t know how she got here but she assumes they all came for the same reasons. security. safety. or maybe, just to get away. Eurydice is sure that if she’d known about Hadestown when she was a younger girl, living in a home with people she loathed, with people who loathed her, she would’ve flown off to hadestown long ago.

Eurydice gets the shower next, stepping into the already steamy small room with the tub and rusty shower head against the wall. the mirror is fogged up and Eurydice leaves it that way, there’s no need to see herself this way. there’s no need to see herself at all. what’s the point down here? who needs mirrors in hell?

shedding her outer layers, she steps right into the shower, watching as the water below fills with dirt and grime, turning it a muted gray color, she stands there until the water turns clear again. she scrubs aimlessly at her skin with the soap bar for a minute or two, trying to feel clean but the dirt stays no matter what she does. it’s under her nails. it’s in her hair. it’s under her skin. she’ll never be rid of it. she’ll never get rid of-

she doubles over in the shower, the dizziness catching her off guard.

“woah, okay.” she murmurs to herself, reaching to clutch the slippery edge of the tub, steadying herself. it passes after a brief ten seconds but she steps out of the shower after that, turning off the water for fear of falling and hitting her head. she knows, objectively, that she can’t really be hurt here in Hadestown but old habits die hard.

dressing slowly and carefully, she addresses the main problem here is that both her head and her stomach are killing her.

well actually the largest looming problem here is: you don’t get sick in Hadestown.

Oh gods, does she have to be the anomaly here?

she’d like to just be normal, just blend into the crowd, but no, she has to be different. she has to stick out like a sore thumb in every place.

before she even knows what’s going on, she’s thrown up what little she’d eaten that day. it makes her feel a little better but sweat makes her forehead sticky, her whole body feels shaky and not quite right.

“Eurydice?” Afra’s voice is unsure of itself, they don’t often use their voices down here. “everything okay in there?”

“yes.” Eurydice calls back. “I’m fine.”

Is she?

she feels something for the first time in awhile: fear.

***

it was all very simple, she should’ve added it up the first time she threw up, so long ago. but it isn’t until she looks in a long mirror for the first time, wearing only her underclothes that she notices something.

no.

gods, no.

she doesn’t make an appointment with Hades, like he says you’re supposed to when you need to speak with him. this is too important, this is too much of his own fault that she has to speak him right then. she wants to cry, she needs to cry but she can’t. so she runs, so she runs as fast as she can until she’s at the doorsteps of the dark building where she knows he resides almost all of the hours of the day.

the door is unlocked, surprisingly, and she just walks in. down dark halls, ignoring the shadows that paint fear across her body. that’s the one thing she can feel nowadays, fear for herself, fear for Orpheus, fear for everything, for their unborn child. no child has been born in Hadestown to her knowledge, a desolate place like this cannot sustain a new life like that. it sucks life away, it tears families apart.

it’s relatively easy to find his office, it’s the only room that’s doorknob isn’t coated with dust and the door is slightly ajar, letting stark light stream into the dark hall.

she bursts inside before she even has time for a second thought.

he’s at his desk, pen in hand, paper in the other. his eyes raise to hers the moment he notices her presence.

“miss Eurydice-”

“cut the bullshit, Hades, why am I still here?”

“I-” she holds up her hand, cutting him off somehow. such an impressive, looming presence usually, but when a women on a mission is in front of him, he never knows what to do. she starts pacing back and forth, in front of his desk. clenching and unclenching her fists. should she punch him? no, no, nothing like that. she didn’t come here for violence... why did she come here? what was her mission when she set out to come here? she doesn’t know, she just knew that she had to get here.

“I thought I’d just be able to live my life in peace. In complete solidarity. That’s what you promised me. you told me I’d get- you said I’d be good here.”

“and didn’t I deliver?” he said, his rumbling voice carrying through the office. across the desk that was separating them. “aren’t you at peace?

she felt something lodged in her throat, she tries to swallow it but the effort makes her voice come out choked. “not anymore.”

suddenly, she feels everywhere. suddenly, she’s so full of feeling her knees nearly crumple to the ground. leaning against the desk. she still doesn’t cry. no, there’s almost too much feeling for that. her whole body is overwhelmed, for so long she felt nothing that this sudden feeling is almost causing her to double over in the pain. it’s fiercely coursing through her veins, her shaking knees could be from the fear or the feeling, she can’t tell.

Hades is up and holding onto one of her arms, his touch surprisingly gentle and uninvasive. he keeps her steady, while guiding her to come sit on a couch on the side of the wall.

“sit here.” he says, his voice shockingly calm and... kind. “I’ll get a glass of water.”

he busies himself with a pitcher of water that sits on his desk, and an empty glass beside it. Eurydice fiddles with the rings on her fingers, trying to sort her mind out, trying to figure out how to say it.

he’s pouring a glass of water. for her.

“I’m pregnant.”

he stops pouring.

he doesn’t turn around either. “your boy...”

“It’s Orpheus’, I’m positive.”

“how long?”

“I only just realized today. I didn’t know who to tell, Lady Persephone is gone and I just don’t know what I’m going to do.”

he’s being surprisingly calm, for a man with no children and no real relationship with Eurydice besides one layered with negative emotions.

“you don’t work for the time being.” he says after a moment of consideration. he turns around, holding a glass of water in one of his hands to face Eurydice’s gaping face. “I need to speak with my wife, but that can’t happen for another few months. So you don’t work and keep busy within what’s left of the walls.”

“what am I supposed to do? for those four months?” she has no idea when she’ll be due, the uncertainty of it is making her feel shaky. the fear strikes her again and she turns her to the side, not making eye contact with Hades again for fear of crumpling in on herself again. she purses her lips.

“I can tell you’re scared,” he begins.

“I’m not-” she starts.

“you younglings always try to convince everyone else that you aren’t terrified,” he thrusts the glass of water into her hand, giving her a pointed look.

“like you’re one to talk.”

he sighs. “only you could sass me when I’m trying to help you.” embarrassment faintly paints Eurydice’s cheeks a blush color, but it fades quickly. “let me continue.

“I can tell you’re scared,” he repeats. “but I’ll promise to protect you and your child, I may be a lot of terrible things but one thing I will never do is force a mother and her child apart. you’ll go back to your apartment and get some rest, tell your roommates that you don’t need to get up for work tomorrow, by special permission of Hades, and I’ll try to get in contact with my wife. But I have a feeling we won’t be able to have a full discussion until she gets back from summertime.”

Eurydice nods and takes a couple sips from that glass of water, her hand shakes so much, she knows that if there was ice in the glass they’d be able to hear the clinking of the two solids. but for now, she tries to act like she isn’t slowly crashing and burning.

Orpheus

Orpheus, you have a child

and he doesn’t know it. he may never know it.

“my child will be doomed to this life, won’t they?” she whispers, eyes downcast. “if-if I give them to Persephone before spring, will they be able to go Up Top? would it be possible?”

he sighs, the sound is burdened. “I don’t know. A child has never been born here before, so I don’t know.”

she stares at the surface of the water, rippling with little currents and waves from her trembling hand. “they will never know grass, or happiness, or love-”

“no.” Hades says firmly, he steps closer, he brushes her knuckles with his fingertips, unsure of what to do as a comfort. but his words are comfort enough. “your child will know love, you will love them and that is love enough.”

she purses her lips tight together, she still does not cry, she still has yet to cross that threshold of pure feeling.

“go home, get some sleep.” it’s a command, almost, like everything Hades says is. she could always refuse but instead of standing up to him like she usually prefers to, she nods, because she could use some sleep in times like now.

***

Eurydice had forgotten love until Calista.

she knew love well before Hadestown but in that span of few months, she forgot what it was like to love. to love something with this fierceness you can’t control, and to have that ability feels powerful. she felt like a monster before, but holding a child close to her chest is what makes her feel human again.

yes, they are still in Hadestown, but when life finds ways to spring up, it flourishes.

she’s moved apartments since finding out about the baby, to a smaller one, a studio with a bathroom and a tiny kitchen but it’s just for her and her daughter. people know that the only current mother in Hadestown lives there, her neighbors seem to brighten at the sight of her child. their darkness when they come back from work slides away for just a little bit of light when Callie smiles at them from afar.

her daughter brings hope, and Eurydice couldn’t be more proud. she doesn’t even know it yet, but Callie is really the carnation in the winter, she’s the light in the dark, the song in the silence.

And Persephone comes back and is immediately pointed in the direction of Eurydice’s apartment by Hades, with barely even a kiss on the cheek, she’s worried something bad has happened. It’s a combination of good and bad in her opinion.

she knocks on the door and a voice calls, “come in!”

Persephone, not knowing what she’ll find, steps inside tentatively. “Hades said to- oh my lords.”

Eurydice sits cross legged on her small bed, a baby sitting in her lap with the widest smile she’s ever seen on a child. she has her mothers eyes, even from here Persephone can see the dark color, the deepness of them.

“hi.” Eurydice begins. Persephone closes the door loudly, accidentally making Eurydice and the baby jump. she surges forward, first taking the young woman’s face in her hands, cupping her cheeks and brushing her cheeks with her thumbs.

“please tell me it’s Orpheus’.” Eurydice nods.

“It is” she assures, “look, she has his nose and you can just see, his hair, too.”

“she’s lovely.” Persephone sighs, sinking to sit beside Eurydice. Persephone brushes Eurydice’s bangs away from her eyes, she notices that they are freshly cut and a little jagged and uneven. she’ll ask about that later. “how old is she?”

“A month.” Eurydice answers immediately, her smile is genuine and Persephone can tell, there is love. a deep, motherly love that Persephone has only ever experienced when she looks at the young girl who turned into a young woman while she was away Up Top. “she came a little early, and I was worried, but she’s doing well now.”

“what’s her name?”

“Calista.” Eurydice says, gently tracing her daughter’s ears and tiny nose. “I started calling her Callie, though, and never stopped.”

“Callie.” Persephone repeats. “I love that.”

“me too.” Eurydice bites her bottom lip, before the real dawning of Persephone being here hits her. her expression barely changes and her tone of voice doesn’t at all but Persephone can feel the shift in the air.

“how is Orpheus doing?”

Persephone continues stroking through her black hair, untangling the knots like she imagines a mother would. “he just started singing again. only the past month or so. his voice sounds different after so long with so little use but it’s just as beautiful as it was when you knew him.”

Eurydice lifts Callie a little higher, adjusts her in her arms so that the child lies with her head in the crook of her elbow. “I’m sad that she’ll never get to meet him.”

she says it simply, she’s already accepted the fact, but underneath that is the lingering of sadness that lies there. an undercurrent of disappointment that Persephone came alone. she’d probably had the tiniest grain of hope and Persephone came empty handed.

“well!” she stands up, straightening out the creases in her dress. “I’d better get to the house, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen my husband up close.”

Eurydice smiles. “alright. see you again really soon?”

“of course.” Persephone plants a kiss on both girl’s heads and heads out the door, blinking away the sharp burn of tears.

***

she walks into Hades’ office and before she can even get the words out, he waves his hand at her without looking up from his ever important paperwork.

“I’m sending her up, don’t worry.”

she opens and closes her mouth. “I thought it might take some convincing.”

he scowls down at his desk. “I’m not heartless. I saw her when she first found out, the selflessness in that girl...” he shakes his head. “she was concerned about not being able to love her kid enough. not being able to provide that for her. she wanted to send Cal up there with you in the spring without her? you know that? the insanity in her, that I’d separate a mother and her child.”

Persephone steps around her and plants a firm, smiling kiss on his lips. Surprising him and pulling him away from his paperwork. “I love you.”

a smile twitches at his lips. “I love you too?”

“so,” Persephone says, promptly taking a small step back. “Eurydice and Callie will come up on the train with me in the spring?”

“as soon as I get all the paperwork in order. this is a... unique situation to say the least.” he turns back to his work, Persephone stands and watches for a moment, before planting one more soft kiss to the top of his head and heading out to get a drink. she can’t tell Eurydice yet, because if it doesn’t come true she’ll be heartbroken but knowing that she’ll be able to take the two of them up with her in the spring will be a joyous moment.

only six months until the couple that became a family gets reunited.

***

Children grow fast, this is something that Eurydice was never told. by the time Callie is seven months old, Eurydice has watched her learn to crawl, learn to reach and to touch and to smile. it still scares her sometimes, that maybe she isn’t meant for this? maybe she’s not cut out for this kind of thing. she’s already had to reason with herself over several things that just dig into her scalp, telling her Callie deserves a better mother. she had to bottle feed her, for god's sakes, her body seems to be malnourished enough and overworked enough that she can’t give that to her daughter. she has to take care of herself too, is what Persephone keeps telling her. she has to give herself a little attention too, give herself some love as well.

she faces Hades one last time in front of the train, he says he’s there to see Persephone off but Eurydice is glad that he’s there.

“thank you,” she says, lifting her chin to look him right in the eyes. “for all that you did for me and Callie, and for you are doing for Orpheus. he doesn’t know it yet, but he will be very thankful to you.”

“don’t say things like that,” he says, voice extra gravelly with the sadness of his wife leaving, but he tries to hide it. “I would never have hired you if I’d known...”

“neither of us knew, I would never have agreed to go if I’d known.”

a small silence stretches between them, she doesn’t know what to do with herself, a year ago she despised this man. everything about him made her heart shudder in her chest, but now... she’s seen his mercy and can’t help but feel that it was there all along.

she holds out her hand to shake his. “thank you, I will make sure to let Calista know as she grows older all that you have done for us.”

he lets out a chuckle as he takes her hand. “I’m sure she will also know all I have done against you.”

“in my opinion, it evens out. thank you.” she drops his hand and climbs onto the train, her stomach starting to swirl in her stomach.

She tries to remind herself of all that she’s been told by Persephone, love herself and that has to be enough, as she climbs the train, she’d handed Calista over to Persephone while Eurydice puts her things on the train. her heart beats so fast, this rhythm of readiness, of anticipation.

thump, thump, thump

Get Callie, she’s getting fussy in another woman’s arms.

thump, thump, thump

Sit down in a seat before the train starts moving.

thump, thump, thump

“if it isn’t my favorite songbird.” a withered voice comes from the front of the train car.

“Hermes.” Eurydice breaths, she speeds her steps up to meet him halfway and throws her arms around his neck. she buries her face in the man’s shoulder, letting him gently hold her like a father would hold a daughter, gently, calmly. he pulls back after barely five seconds.

“you takin’ the train?” she nods with something like tears stinging in the back of her eyes but they aren’t close to falling, yet. Hermes’ smile stretches almost all the way to his eyes, wrinkles creasing on his forehead. “he’ll be waiting for Seph, right by the station.’

Eurydice smiles but her heartbeat is still flurrying over her entire chest, heat spreading across her whole body like a licking fire. she needs a distraction from her shaking hands and churning stomach. Hermes pats her cheek affectionately, finally looking over her shoulder and squinting at Persephone holding the infant in her arms. he narrows his eyes, like he’s seeing a mirage and isn’t sure exactly what he’s seeing.

Eurydice breaks away from him, going to Persephone to take her daughter from the other woman’s arms. “this is your kind of granddaughter, Calista.”

“a lovely name for a lovely girl.” Hermes smiles in that way he always does when he knows something, when he looks at someone and can see their future. Eurydice always feels exposed whenever Hermes looks at her, like he knows what goes on in her head every day. like he knows all of her fears and hopes and emotions. the train starts moving in that moment and Eurydice has to sit down, holding Callie in her lap, pulling her tightly against her chest.

they move through tunnels, the dim lights of the mines flash through the windows every once in awhile, flushing the four of them in a golden glow, turning Persephone’s green dress into a brownish color, splashing across Hermes face briefly and throwing shadows like the darkness of the wall falling over her. she hasn’t worked on the wall in months, hasn’t gone into the mines in about as long, but it still haunts her. to forget how to feel, though since Orpheus came and left, the place improved it still left her feeling like there a life she was missing out on, the other half of her. or maybe it just was that her other half was Up Top. Callie taught her to remember feeling, taught to feel again altogether. and when she begins to whimper in the dark of the train, her heart stutters and all she wants is to make her smile again.

“shhh,” Eurydice murmurs, bounding the little girl on her knee briefly. “it’s alright, love, shh.”

even just her voice soothes the child and she quiets, she is normally not the most emotional infant, though they all cry, Eurydice knows that from her younger siblings. she takes after her mother in that, she only gets emotional really when Eurydice gets emotional. so now, when Eurydice is nervous and fidgety and on edge, the girl picks up on it and begins to cry. she calms herself, taking deep breath and pressing a kiss to her daughters soft bed of dark brown hair.

it’s a longer train ride than Eurydice would think, so they sit in silence, contemplative over what is to come, over what is going to happen when those doors open and sunshine floods the train car. when Orpheus is right before her what will she say? what will she do? he doesn’t even know she’s coming, he’ll be happy to see her, won’t he? yes, yes, he will. she knows this, she knows he loved her, and hopes for that present tense to re-enter the assuredness of her vocabulary. she loves him, simple as that, and he will love what she brings with her.

as light starts to flood the car, she closes her eyes, feeling the warmth flood through her body. the familiar scent of the dirt and the trees, the sound of chattering voices and birds beginning to chirp, everything so familiar yet so foreign. the last time she was this anxious to step outside was during The Walk and she never stepped foot outdoors during that. she’s both ready and most definitely not.

“here,” Persephone says. “I’ll take Cal, and you can step out by yourself. take a look about, greet old friends without this little one in your arms.”

reluctantly, Eurydice relinquishes Callie into Persephone’s arms. she stands, ready to face her fate, ready to smell the earth, bask in the sunlight. she is here, she is full of light, she is ready.

she’s ready.

the train car opens by itself and she steps out, shading her eyes with her hand to gaze over the crowd, which a hush falls over. she is known here, though she looks different. though having been pregnant and gave birth, she’s lost weight. the doctors she saw worried for Callie’s health, when Eurydice has spent her whole life only getting just enough to eat and too often in Hadestown she neglected to eat, after the pregnancy especially, it seemed. she just simply... forgot to take care of herself sometimes. those were the days where she got talks from Persephone, lectures from Hades, both about taking care of herself not just for herself, for Calista. she tried her best, but old habits die hard. she looks more tired now, her hair now just brushing the very tops of her shoulders but the bangs freshly cut. every few months, or when she was feeling especially restless, she would go to the bathroom with a pair of scissors and retrim her bangs. what a great influence she’ll be on her kid.

and in the crowd, in the very back of the crowd, is a boy just a little bit older and more tired looking. and his eyes are raised to hers. his mouth is forming the first syllable of her name, with a question in his eyes. is this real? are you real?

and she wants to run to him and say yes yes yes yes im real this is real this is true

but she can’t move until Hermes walks up beside her, loops his arm through hers and begins to walk her down the steps of the station. the crowd parts for them and Eurydice can’t help but see the imagery of it all. like a bride walking down the aisle, she is being given away for the second time in her life. the first, she gave away herself, in secret. not an elopement but a ritual in which they were “married”. this time, she is given away to this life that she once gave up. here, she is being given permission to step back into this life, she is being given permission to look him in the eyes, to speak to him. he gives her away and leaves her there at the altar- or rather, right in front of Orpheus- and leaves her there, blending back into the crowd.

“how- how... what are you- how are you-?” he runs a hand through his hair, just looking at her, just... looking. “Eurydice-”

when he says her name, her entire body feels like it will combust and she can’t just stay standing there. it feels like their first kiss: happening before she knows what’s happening and over before she wants it to. whistles break out through the crowd, a laughter spreading through the silence. the tension breaks and she’s left just feeling his hands at her waist, and his face close to hers, his breath against her cheeks, fluttering her eyelashes against the breeze.

“how-?” he asks again.

she licks her lips, unsure of how to say it. “I’ll show you.”

Persephone is already walking towards them, holding Callie to her chest. Orpheus, the ever confused, just stares. the two dots not yet connected yet, so he must say the first thing that comes to mind.

“congratulat-”

Persephone shakes her head and laughs. “no, poet.” and hands Callie to Eurydice.

he watches with wide eyes as Eurydice holds the child in one arm and with the other, adjusts Orpheus’ arms so that she can gently place the girl in his arms. she holds both his arms and the baby for a moment before removing her hands and stepping back. his eyes flick from Eurydice, down to the infant, and then back to Eurydice in a panicked state.

“her name is Calista, she’s seven months old... and she’s your daughter.”

Orpheus lets out a huge, deep, shuddering sigh that feels somehow close to tears. he finally looks down and admires the face of the girl in his arms, and as he does, Eurydice tells him about her.

“she has your nose, and your hair, but my eyes. she’s not very talkative but she likes to be read to before going to sleep, and she always, always prefers to sleep close to me, or close to a person. she’s like you, she loves to listen. and she loves people-”

she stops herself at the sight of his face, smiling but filled with this sorrowful inside. “I can’t believe- I missed a whole life starting... Eurydice, she’s so beautiful.”

“not your fault, Orpheus, neither of us knew.” she murmurs. “and now, we’re here.”

“you’re home.”

[roadtohadestown]

hadestown thoughts n’ things song-by-song

Y’ALL KNOW I SAW HADESTOWN A COUPLE DAYS AGO AND I GOT SOME THINGS TO SAY !!! these aren’t gonna be me fully describing how the songs play out (a couple times yes, but not from start to finish), but are me pointing out little things that i found very memorable or funny or were little “OH SHIT” kinda moments.

(i’ll also be referring to the characters by their actors every now and then)

occasionally i’ll refer to the fates individually by their actual names (clotho, lachesis, atropos); if you don’t know which actresses play who:

yvette -> clotho // kay → lachesis // jewelle -> atropos

———

ACT 1

road to hell:

the cast came out all at once and i swear my heart JUMPED when i saw them enter and wave at the audience !!!!

andré came in walking slowly over to his usual spot on stage right. while walking, he was holding the hands of some of the cast who were sitting at the tables.

the fates snapping a sassy look at hermes when he says “three old women all dressed the same.”

introducing orpheus, orpheus is literally a happy ball of sunshine running onstage, holding a red rag and a crate and starts wiping down the tables.

when hermes introduces eurydice, orpheus and eurydice bump into each other at the center of the stage. they stare at one another for the rest of road to hell and it’s so so cute and enchanting. sitting on orchestra left, i was just watching orpheus’s face, so awestruck and in love.

any way the wind blows:

fuck i am so gay for the fates

eurydice’s “anybody got a match ??” and hermes holding out a matchbox to her. she snatches it and says “gimme that.”

eurydice lighting the candle and clotho blowing it out.

lachesis gracing a hand on eurydice’s hair (and i forget at which lyric because my mind is Like That and Forgetful)

come home with me:

eva casually dragging her hand back and forth above the flame, playing with it because she’s not really the focus of the scene and needs something to do while reeve’s busy crumpling a newspaper to make a flower for her

hermes saying, “orpheus......don’t come on too strong”

and orpheus—directly after hearing hermes say that—says to eurydice, “coMe hOmE wITh ME !!!” featuring reeve’s wonky movements that make orpheus seem awkward, which is just plain cute

at one point, he sits on the table beside her

hermes taking the candle from eurydice’s hands and placing it aside on another table. this candle stays lit for a lot of act 1, then is later blown out because we need Metaphors and Symbolism

i love that eurydice crumples up orpheus’s paper flower, then stuffs it in her pocket

wedding song:

damn i love eva and reeve

damn i love this ensemble

damn that flower is red

epic i:

once hermes says “sing it again though” and hands orpheus his guitar, orpheus straps it on. he takes a little moment of silence before he starts singing—like he’s trying to prepare himself first. in that moment, he’s actually just staring at eurydice and smiling because he loves her so much—

livin’ it up on top:

I LOVE THE FATES AND THEIR FANS !!! EVEN THEY’RE SUPER HAPPY THROUGHOUT LIVIN’ IT UP

WHEN PERSEPHONE COMES BACK FROM HADESTOWN, ORPHEUS IS SO GIDDY !!! YOU COULD SEE HIM SMILING LIKE CRAZY AND HE’S A LITTLE JUMPY BECAUSE HE’S SO EXCITED SEPH’S HERE !! HE’S LIKE AN EXCITED LITTLE PUPPY !!! HE WAS SO EAGER TO TAKE HER COAT TOO !!!

orpheus juMP

he was literally throwing a couple silver cups to hermes (who caught them)

there were cute little john and eva moments, with john dancing around her at one point

persephone tried to shove eurydice in with the dancing ensemble to get her to join, but eurydice walked away waving her hands and awkwardly smiling as if saying, “no thanks, i’m not gonna do that,” (but obviously later persephone successfully drags eury into dancing, and she’s wonderful at it)

when hermes said “let the poet bless this round!” ahmad, while holding one of the wine bottles, puts his hands up as if to say “alright, he can do it”

after orpheus gave his speech and they drank from their cups, hermes actually coughed—like the wine was just too much for him asjhsnsj

all i’ve ever known:

persephone’s onstage during the little hermes introduction bit. when he mentions orpheus and eurydice, seph holds out her arms to each of them as he does (as if indicating who’s who) before sitting down at the side to watch the two lovers.

orpheus takes off his apron (finally), revealing him in full with his nifty suspenders 😩💕

when eurydice said “now i wanna hold you too,” she was frantically moving her hands, grabbing different parts of orpheus’s arms

that sex scene was beautiful (IT’S JUST A GRACEFUL INTIMATE DANCE BETWEEN THE TWO AND IT’S PRETTY !! ESPECIALLY WITH THE LIGHTING)

mwah

way down hadestown:

orpheus and eurydice dancing around as everyone sings about hades and hadestown (spoiler: they’re cute)

as hades and persephone descend, smoke comes out of the pit, and the ensemble is leaning in to look down there. ahmad’s in front of all of them—leaning too—but also has his arms outstretched to his sides, keeping everyone else back. they all eventually break apart, and honestly the thing i most remember is just afra with her knees on the table and her hands gripping the edges of the table, too, to peer down into the pit.

gathering storm:

me, watching afra hand eurydice her coat

orpheus takes out his tiny notebook and pencil from his pocket and goes to the side to start writing in it, because he “needs to finish the song”

eurydice clutching her arms as she says “we need food.......we need firewood.....”

“okay, finish it...”

she goes over to orpheus and places a hand on his arm, then leaves

epic ii:

AW HELL YEAH, THEY BROUGHT BACK THE “doubt that she’d ever come, dread that she’d never come, doubt that his lover would ever come back” LYRICS !!

orpheus uses present tense instead of past tense !!! it’s now “he thinks of his wife in the arms of the sun” instead of “he thought of his wife in the arms of the sun” and etc.

chant i:

the workers’ choreo is so mesmerizing. SO MESMERIZING.

reeve sings the la la la’s differently than the broadway preview audio i heard before, and i LOVE how he sings it now. his ending “la la la la la la” leads into the workers’ “low, keep your head, keep your head low” and oh my god i am so in love with that

“is it finished !?” eurydice asks hermes. “not yet,” hermes replies. she asks “is he always like this !?” and he nods.

hermes is now narrating in third-person about how orpheus is ignoring the storm rather than speaking to orpheus directly

i really don’t know how i feel about eva going lower when she sings “harbor me.” in the past she’s went higher; and because i used to hear that all the time, now that she‘s going lower my mind‘s thinking “c’mon, you can go higher !! i know you’re capable of it.” but regardless, eva’s voice is still the most beautiful thing i’ll ever hear 😩💓

the way the fates snatch away eurydice’s backpack and coat is so elegant, yet cool and pitiful

EVA I HOPE YOUR KNEES ARE OK FROM THAT FALL. I KNOW YOU DO IT EVERY NIGHT, BUT STILL.

hey little songbird:

hades casually putting on his shades

patrick’s juicy low notes are to die for

“see how the vipers and vultures surround you” reveals the three fates making their way closer to eurydice

when the chips are down (intro):

the little coin ( / ticket to hadestown ) hades gives eurydice

the way eurydice holds up both the flower and coin in the air as if contemplating which to choose

when the chips are down:

yvette, please step on me

kay, please step on me

jewelle, please step on me

please. step on me.

gone, i’m gone:

shoutout to andré off to the side making all the necessary sound effects.

hermes jingles a coin bag until eurydice comes up and puts her coin (“ticket”) in the bag, indicating she’s boarded the train to hadestown.

cue andré blowing the little flute thing to imitate a train whistle. again, thank u for ur sound effects.

wait for me:

orpheus finally looking up from his tiny notebook with a smile on his face, as if he’s happy that he’s made progress on his song and wants to tell that to eurydice. but when he looks up, he sees hermes from afar instead and (still with an innocent smile) exclaims “mr. hermes !!” before going up to him. (unlike the london production, he doesn’t look around searching for eurydice first before encountering hermes.)

orpheus drops to his knees as he says “no...” during his convo with hermes

the workers shining the lights around like they’re search lights is so COOL

THE FOG !!!

the lights actually swinging over people’s heads in the first row. wow. just,, wow.

FATESFATESFATESI’MSOGAY

THE SET OPENING UP !!! I KNEW IT WAS GONNA HAPPEN, BUT DAMN THAT WAS SO MUCH MORE EPIC IN REAL LIFE

the way reeve jumped off the platform !!! TBH KINDA HOT

i was watching him run along the turntable and it was an awkward little run LOL

“I’M COMING WAIT FOR ME !!!!!” “WAIT” “I HEAR THE WALLS REPEATING !!!” that scene was so GOOD and MUCH MORE INTENSE IRL !!!

i loooOOOVED the way the workers turned their lights at each “WAIT !!”

why we build the wall

the workers retreat to the sides of the stage and hades comes in. they’re so stiff just standing there and singing and i’m like—well fuck.

the saLUTE !!! it’s literally just them putting an index finger up, bUT STILL. FUCK.

eurydice looks around to see everyone saluting, and eventually joins in with them and does it too

the way amber dramatically turns around with her arms swinging about, pauses, then says, “anybody wanna drink?”

ACT 2

our lady of the underground:

“SSSSSSTEP INTO MY OFFICE !!!!” *intensely hip thrusts her way to hell (disregard that she’s already in it—)*

“i got the wind right here in a jar” *grabs her boob and jiggles it*

don’t we just stan amber gray

way down hadestown ii:

andré making the sound of “the pickaxe ringing” by banging a silver cup against the microphone on the stand

eurydice coming through the door and down the stairs. upon seeing the workers, she exclaims, “i’m eurydice !!” with a smile on her face like she’s ready to meet new people, but her smile fades away once she realizes no one’s paying attention to her. “doesn’t anybody hear me?” she asks the fates. and clotho responds, “oh they can hear! but they don’t care,” with a devious smile on her (and the rest of the fates’) face(s). “no one has a name down here.”

the fates proceed to tell eurydice how the workers have all forgotten about their lives before hadestown, and eurydice will turn out just like the rest.

lachesis says, “so what was your name again?” (no response) “see? you’ve already forgotten.”

flowers:

eva’s voice.........SO SAD

how she holds out her hand left hand to the side, as if trying to caress someone’s face who isn’t there.

come home with me ii:

yeah, orpheus comes in from the audience and climbs onto the stage as he says, “come home with me !!” and it’s ADORABLE

he puts his guitar down as he gets onstage (which i’d say is a metaphor for him choosing eurydice over his music)

she leaps into his arms, they embrace each other, and it’s the absolute most sweetest thing ever

papers:

“hades, i know this boy !” (persephone) // “one of the unemployed...” (hades) // “his name is orpheus—!” // “you stay out of this...” // and persephone gives him a look because he just shuts her down, and she knows she can’t do anything about it

as the fates approach orpheus, eurydice extends her arms out trying to protect him

clotho snatching orpheus’s guitar and mischievously examining it

mmmmm look at that fight scene

nothing changes:

ugh, i love that acappella and their voices are SPICY 🔥🔥💯🔥

the way clotho just holds his guitar above him while he’s lying there on the ground, beaten, like she’s teasing him

if it’s true:

eurydice retreating back to the turntable with the other workers, knowing full well there’s nothing she can do, and simply works away like the rest of them

“is this how the world is !? to be beaten and betrayed and then be told that nothing changes—will it always be like this !?” is my favorite

orpheus finally standing and is still in pain from all the workers beating him up

him pointing at each of the workers as he says “i’m asking me...and you and you and you!”

the workers each get up as they sing “we stand and listen” (or is it “we stand with him” ?? whatever, you get what i mean). but orpheus is giving them hope !!! yes !!!

how long:

persephone and hades standing on either side of the pit

they were staring at each other, moving in sync like a mirror; when persephone stepped with her right foot, hades with his left, and so on.

chant ii:

the workers and orpheus slowly rising up from the pit

“is it truuuuue ???” echoing in the back, then hades shouting “it’s the bOY !!”

when the workers say “i can’t look at my brother’s eyes,” afra and ahmad started getting up from the center and refused to make eye contact.

while i am still salty about them cutting persephone’s chant ii verse, i didn’t dislike hades’ new part. i liked it.

as hades shouts, “I CONDUCT THE ELECTRIC CITY !!!!” aLL THE LIGHTS IN THE THEATRE GO OUT AND IT’S WICKED COOL

epic iii:

sitting in my seat was honestly a perfect spot for me. hades was sitting in his stool and his back was to me, so obviously i couldn’t see much of his facial expressions, but it was literally like i was getting hades perspective as he viewed orpheus singing.

the most magical moment in the show tbh

when orpheus first sings “la la la” and hades says “where’d you get that melody ??” he gets up and starts walking towards orpheus like he’s about ready to fight and sue him for plagiarism

but persephone intervenes with a gentle “let him finish hades” before he takes another step. so he backs off.

when orpheus was singing about how hades “saw [persephone] alone there against the sky, it was like she was someone [he’d] always known,” eurydice steps up on the turntable. orpheus is in the center, with persephone and eurydice on either side of him—truly showing the parallels between orpheus and eurydice’s love with that of hades and persephone’s.

hades eventually gets on the center with orpheus, and the platform rises again. when everyone—workers and fates included—surrounds them on the turntable below, singing with orpheus, hades looks around at all of them, angry and confused

at the big “la la la la la la la” moment when everyone joins in with orpheus, the workers each get up in pairs as their side of the turntable finally faces the audience. they step up and remove their hats.

the workers finally make eye contact with one another

REEVE REALLY HITS THAT NOTE. AND IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL.

the way the flower just appears in hades hands after he sings “la la la la la la la...”

you can really SEE persephone crying

lover’s desire:

persephone putting the flower on his vest is so cute

SHE TAKES HIS HANDS

i love hades and persephone ok shut up i’m soft

KIMBERLY PUTTING HER HAND ON AHMAD’S ARM, THEN LOOKING UP AT HIM AND TIMOTHY. JOHN AND AFRA ARE SIDE BY SIDE, HOLDING EACH OTHER AS THEY WATCH HADES AND PERSEPHONE DANCE.

promises:

honestly i don’t remember too much of it visually because i was too busy crying.

i heard “i don’t need a ring for my finger, i just need a steady hand to hold,” and i just started BAWLING

i think i remember she takes his hand when he says “do you let me walk with you” though

“can we go?”

“i don’t know...”

word to the wise:

the fates dancing around hades was just. mmMMM.

his kiss, the riot:

he removes the flower on his vest. (oh, symbolism, we meet again.)

hades is beside hermes as he tells him “let there be one term to be agreed upon...”

wait for me ii (intro):

ah yes. hermes sitting on that stool as it slowly turns around on the turntable.

wait for me ii:

during my show, andré accidentally sang “that is the road to paradise and likewise the path to ruin.” which is alright. we all make mistakes, it’s okay fam 👏

i started crying again once eva and reeve harmonized on “wait for me...i’m coming” and looked at one another

“are we gonna try again?” “it’s time for spring...we’ll try again next fall.” “wait for me?” “i will.”

as orpheus is walking along the turntable, hermes, persephone, eurydice, and the workers are gathered in the center. near the end of the song when they’re all singing “waiiiit for me... i’m comiiiing, waiiiiiit i’m... coming with you” persephone’s holding out the red flower while eurydice has her hand outstretched to orpheus.

EVA JUMP

“I’M COMING WAIT FOR MEEEEEEEEEE I HEAR THE WALLS REPEATING THE FALLIN’ OF OUR FEET AND !! IT SOUNDS LIKE DRUMMIN’ !!!!!!”

it all goes dark as they sing “i’m coming !!!! (coming !!) (coming !!)”

doubt comes in:

IT’S LITERALLY AS GOOD AS YOU’D THINK IT IS

SO OMINOUS AND SPOOKY WITH THE FOG !!!!

eurydice’s following right behind orpheus, but he doesn’t know that. and the doubt and uncertainty on his face is heart-wrenching.

like. the STRESS on his face as he throws both his hands to his head and clutches his hair.

as the scene needs to focus on orpheus and his perspective of feeling alone, the spotlight is taken off of eurydice as she stops walking and lets the turntable turn until her full figure retreats into darkness. the spotlight is fully on orpheus and orpheus alone.

in the dark, three lanterns gradually rise up from the pit. as the fates start singing, their voices are hauntingly beautiful in the scene.

“doubt comes in...the wind is changing...doubt comes in...how cold it’s blowin’...doubt comes in...and meets a stranger walking on a road a l o n e . where is she ?? where is she now ??”

orpheus’s “who am i ?? why am i all alone ?? who do i think i am ? who am i to think that she would follow me into the cold and dark again.”

“orpheus, i’m listening—i’m right here !! and i will be to the end !! and the coldest night of the coldest year comes right before the spring.”

“i used to see the way the world could be...and now the way it is is all i see.”

orpheus’s realism contrasted with eurydice’s optimism just tugs at your heartstrings. orpheus, the once optimistic poet who “could see the way the world could be” no longer has that gift. eurydice, once a realist, has now been given hope that her lover can show her the way.

near the end of the song, the stairs begin to light up, and so does the exit. they’re so close to the surface—they’re almost there. and eurydice is so hopeful. she’s so certain they’ll make it that she doesn’t even doubt for a second that orpheus will turn around. but suddenly you hear a gasp. and you realize in the blink of an eye that orpheus had made a grave mistake. he’s turned around. his eyes are on eurydice, who’s frozen and in tears.

“it’s you...” he utters.

there’s a long silence

“it’s me...” her words are weak. “orpheus...?”

“eurydice...”

eurydice drops to her knees as she quickly descends back to hadestown. orpheus had scrambled his way to the edge of the pit, helplessly on his knees, staring down at where his lover had just been.

road to hell ii:

hermes’ “a’ight” after a long silence just brought me so many emotions. fuck.

as hermes is singing, eventually orpheus gets up and, with no other choice but to push on, continue his way up the stairs (to the surface), slowly and alone.

“‘cause here’s the thing: to know how it ends and still begin to sing it again...as if it might turn out this time...i learned that from a friend of mine.”

“see, orpheus was a poor boy—“ dressed in her act 1 clothes, eurydice reappears onstage saying, “anybody got a match?” hermes is still up front in the center, facing the audience as he holds out a matchbox in his left hand. “but he had a gift to give...” eurydice comes up and takes the box from him, “gimme that.” she sits down on the ground and takes out the candle from her bag, lighting the match, then lighting her candle.

from her pocket, she takes out a red flower and holds it to her face, sniffing it. a soft smile forms on her lips—like there’s some sentiment to this flower that she’s yet to know of—and puts it in her hair.

as the pit comes back up with all the tables and chairs, there’s persephone sitting on one of the tables.

at the end, orpheus returns back onstage with his apron and everything, stopping at one of the steps as he makes eye contact with eurydice. they’re staring at each other, lovestruck, just as they were in the beginning. “we’re gonna sing it again...”

we raise our cups:

persephone and eurydice’s harmonies 💞💓💖💕❤️💞💞

orpheus playing his guitar onstage even though all that shit just happened 😭 i cri

———

miscellaneous things:

act 1 was great, but the moment act 2 started i instantly knew it was gonna be my favorite. in the past when listening to audio, i always preferred to listen to act 1, with only a couple songs from act 2. so i always thought act 1 was my favorite act. but finally seeing hadestown in person, i think act 2 probably takes the cake.

once curtain call started, i was clapping like mad. when we got to the ensemble bowing, my hands were already dead but i was like, “FUCK IT, IF MY HANDS FALL OFF TONIGHT IT WAS WORTH IT BECAUSE I GOTTA APPRECIATE THIS ENTIRE CAST”

[anais-mitchell]

hadestown 7/3/19

Here are my extremely extra, barely coherent, thoughts on seeing Hadestown live on a song by song basis! Nobody asked for this and it took forever but I’m nothing if not embarrassingly extra. 

Road to Hell: The way they walk onstage with zero fanfare is just amazing. Andre took like 30 seconds to start the song, he looked out at the audience and unbuttoned his coat and it was sooo funny. He owned this song as always, the energy was so high and the audience was having the best time! One detail I loved was when Hermes introduced Orpheus, Persephone looked so proud like “that’s m’boy.” Then he waved his hand super excitedly and it was the cutestt. 

Any Way the Wind Blows: First of all, Orpheus is watching Eurydice in awe during this whole song. When she says “anybody got a match?” he starts frantically rifling through his pockets for one before she gets one from Hermes. Eva portrays Eurydice’s scrappy, emotionally guarded nature so well during this song, you can really feel how rough her life has been and why she’d be hesitant to trust someone like Orpheus with her heart. When she first lights her candle, Clotho blows it out immediately and gets such a vicious joy from it. The next time Eurydice lights it, she cups her hands around it and glares at Clotho which was SO GOOD. 

Come Home With Me: This works way better live than in audios and is 10x better than the previews version. The audience cracks up after “cOmE hOmE wItH mE.” Also, before he goes over to her he’s trying to craft a paper flower for her (which she looks at like “wtf is this.”) It’s clear Eurydice isn’t really taking him seriously but is still intrigued, and she’s having a good time with him so why not humor him? Also Reeve’s movements as Orpheus are super fast and jerky which just makes the awkward humor even better.

Wedding Song: AHH SO FLIRTY AND FUN. You can tell they really challenge each other with their polar opposite worldviews. When Eurydice says “you wanna take me home?” she flashes her shoulder under her coat and poses dramatically which is the most Eva thing I’ve ever seen. The turning point comes hard when Orpheus sings his song and procures the rose, and Eurydice’s admiration and wonder are so real it hurts my heart. Also the way Orpheus perks up at “when we’re wed” kills me. Eva went up on “and the trees gonna lay the wedding table” which I like better than taking it down. 

Epic I: Amber looks absolutely radiant when she stands up and stares out in the middle of the song, that is all. But Reeve sounded lovely and the staging wasn’t what I expected, I always thought he was sitting during this number. 

Livin’ It Up On Top: The Biggest Bop To Ever Bop. Everyone is so excited to see Persephone and she is So Drunk. I’ve heard the kiss goodbye to Hades is often different show-to-show; at my show, she kissed him on the cheek and he didn’t really look up at all. Then when she was towards the stairs she looked back to see if he would be looking at her and he wasn’t so she looked pissed before descending. Amber’s energy and dancing are on fire during this number, it really just has to be seen. Before Eurydice was pushed into dancing by Persephone, she was chatting with John’s character and it was really cute. Also ORPHEUS’S TOAST!!! It’s such a sobering moment in the middle of the party and everyone can find some truth in it in their life. But right after, the music springs back to life SO LOUDLY and made me ridiculously happy. What a fun number.

All I’ve Ever Known: SOFT SOFT SOFT SOFT. Eurydice’s vulnerability throughout this song and Orpheus’s constant reassurement of how much he loves her,,, chef’s kiss especially considering how the plot develops after. When Orpheus begins his part, Eurydice is turned away from him and when he sings “who am I that I should get to hold you?” she does a tiny head shake like she’s not deserving of it :(( but then when he sings his next line she turns around and starts singing with him. The interlude is so beautifully choreographed and intimate (but #EurydiceTops) and the ending + the kiss just melt my heart. They continue kissing into the train whistle for WDH. OH ALSO!! Persephone is off to the side watching them for the whole song with a very bittersweetly romantic expression… she’s definitely thinking about when she and Hades were young and in love like that… 

Way Down Hadestown: Everyone’s reaction to this song starting is so fucking funny, Hermes and the Fates look so excited for the Drama™️, Persephone is pissed and needs a goddamn drink, and Orphydice just want everyone to go tf away so they can cuddle. (Seriously though Orpheus and Eurydice are so ridiculously cute in the background of this number) I’m obsessed with Amber’s bent over exorcism dance and her energy throughout the song, it’s such a last hurrah for Persephone above ground and she’s going to make the most of it damnit. Eurydice’s curiosity grows throughout the song and she starts drifting away from Orpheus until Hades’ entrance, and his entrance is SO COOL. As annoyed as Seph is to go back under, you can see a glimmer of excitement at seeing Hades again especially since she doesn’t realize how much he’s changed Hadestown. The ending of the song is so good and Eva’s belting kills me.

A Gathering Storm: Orpheus and Eurydice are staring up into the audience at the “storm” which adds a really cool ominous effect. What was even more ominous was all the ensemble finding different exits from the stage (I was mostly watching John who exited through Hades’ balcony door, but they all used a different one) and backing off the stage completely dead eyed. Definitely a nice visual symbol of them becoming the workers. Eva conveyed Eurydice’s fear and anxiety so well, especially with the Fates bringing back the “wind comes up” motif; the return of this motif, especially after Eurydice’s vulnerability during All I’ve Ever Known, is a great manifestation of Eurydice’s doubt in her decision and her security with Orpheus.

Epic II: Reeve’s voice Big Pretty. I love the staging of this Epic with Orpheus all alone on stage, it’s hard not to believe in the power of his song once the music picks up with “king of mortar.” I also really love how the workers come up as a visual representation of the evolution of Hadestown. + the transition to Chant makes me NUT.

Chant: Seph’s look of absolute disgust as she enters Hadestown is soo good and I LOVE the workers choreo. One thing that really surprised me was that while Amber brought a lot of anger to Persephone, there was also so much sadness? Especially when she was listening to Hades justifying his actions, it was like a devastated horror and despair rather than unflinching anger. (Also her mic went out a tiny bit during her lines but it’s barely noticeable listening back to it) Orpheus is so in his own world during his bits and we are ALL Hermes yelling at him to “look up!” The most iconique part of the song though is 100% “the gods have forgotten the song of their love” where everything stops and Persephone rips her hand away from Hades and then Orpheus goes right back in with the la la las. As for Eurydice’s verses, Eva’s vocals may not have been as strong as they could be but her acting killed me. You really got the sense that she wanted to believe in Orpheus, she wanted to believe that she could be optimistic like him but the world was dragging her down into her jaded ways. The Fates were so vindictive grabbing her bag/jacket and she was crying when she fell on the floor :((

Hey Little Songbird: My mom as soon as this song started: “Did he win a Tony?” I really didn’t get predatory vibes from this which I liked as a directorial choice, it was a lot more like Hades was just laying the offer out and not like he had underlying sexual motives. (That being said... the way he skulks around stage... Big Hot) My favorite dumb detail in this number though was definitely how after “they’ll take you down, they’ll pick you clean” the Fates lined up and gave Eurydice a little wave with the most sinister smiles on their faces.

When the Chips Are Down: This song starts with Hades walking offstage and leaving Eurydice alone (except for the Fates and Hermes as the narrator) to consider his offer, and she’s standing at the front of the stage in the same pose from the Tonys performance with the two coins in her hand. Eurydice seems extremely overwhelmed and emotionally tortured by the Fates; they taunt her by twirling her around and pretending to include her in their dances which distresses her a lot. But you can tell that they’re just confirming what she’s already thinking. And man are the Fates GLORIOUS. They’re so much fun and their harmonies are incredible. I still can’t believe Jewelle Blackman just exists with a voice like That... HOW.

Gone, I’m Gone: Eva sang this a lot differently than I’ve heard in usual audios? It was still excellent but I guess she was just trying some new things with it. (Not to harp about how much I love Eva but her acting is just so fluid and adaptable depending on what she’s feeling that performance, no two performances are the same with her for sure) She was so heartbroken but also very resolute :((

Wait for Me: STUNNING SHOWSTOPPING BEAUTIFUL PERFECT NEVER SEEN BEFORE NEVER THE SAME- Yeah this was good. Orpheus’ pure panic at seeing Eurydice gone and how he immediately throws himself into rescuing her THAT’S LOVE BITCH. When the workers start rotating on stage during “how to get to Hadestown” their lights are shining straight out into the audience and it makes you feel like you really are a part of the number. Not going to harp on the staging too much considering we’ve all seen the Tonys performance but the swinging lights took my breath away and when the stage opens up with his la la las and the lights of Hadestown shine so brightly and the workers are staring up in awe? (Hadestown absolutely deserved best set design don’t @ me) The best moment in the whole show. All the fuss about this number is so justified. It’s utterly incredible.

Why We Build the Wall: The staging of this is so simple yet so effective. The workers stand up ramrod straight and resume their dead eyed look as soon as Hades (and Persephone) enter the stage. This song hits so hard in 2019 and I’m so grateful it exists. Tbh though I COULD NOT take my eyes off of Amber the whole song, well at least until Eva ascended lol. Her barely masked horror and despair are so well conveyed yet she has to sing this song she couldn’t believe in less. After seeing it live, I much prefer the lack of a Eurydice solo- in this version, Eurydice doesn’t sing at all until the final line, rather just taking in the entirety of Hadestown wide-eyed and almost scared until she assimilates. It doesn’t really fit this characterization of Eurydice for her to have already internalized the mantra of the workers and I much prefer seeing Eva’s face journey up until she reluctantly sings the final line. By far my favorite part of this song (which I could honestly write an essay on) is the moment right after Hades calls Eurydice to his office; Eurydice and Persephone share the longest look that I couldn’t put my finger on for a while, but I think the best way to describe it is just utter powerlessness. Eurydice is powerless to refuse Hades and is scared of what might happen, but her looking at Persephone for help does nothing because she’s equally as powerless to stop her husband from fulfilling his power trip. It’s such a subtle moment between the two women at the mercy of a man and gahhh I could talk about it forever.

Our Lady of the Underground: I WOULD DIE FOR AMBER GRAY, I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE I SAW THIS SHIT LIVE. She’s one of the greatest performers of our lifetime and deserves every award ever. She enters the stage arm in arm with Hermes which is so cute but homegirl is SCHWASTED. She keeps on taking swigs from her flask and her dancing is just so ridiculous but works so well?? Her life is falling apart but she’s having the time of her life which is honestly relatable. One cool thing about this number when I saw it is that half the band was different so I got to hear some different names than usual when she introduced them. My soul fucking ascended on “you want stars?” and didn’t come down until the song ended. God bless Amber Gray.

Way Down Hadestown (Reprise): Ahh I was surprised by how much I dug the staging for this number, the way the Fates dance through and around the workers is so cool. Eurydice’s face changes throughout the song to reflect the sense of dread that keeps building up, and at the end she tries to run away and is blocked by the workers :((

Flowers: Eva actually cried through this whole song it’s fine I’m fine. She’s sitting down on her knees the whole time and just looks so small and sad my heart. I feel like Eva’s changed the way she sings this song from London a lot and she’s sacrificed a lot of vocal tricks and notes for a more helpless, lonely, devastated performance and it’s sooo good.

Come Home With Me (Reprise): THEY’RE SO HAPPY TO SEE EACH OTHER KILL ME. They literally do not let go of each other the whole time and you can see how much they each blame themselves for how things happened and how much they don’t want each other to blame themselves and it all just hurts a lot. But Eurydice’s face just falls and becomes fearful when she remembers Hades and realizes they can’t leave :(

Papers: Hades is LIVING for the drama in this song. The whole time, Eurydice is just trying to get Orpheus to go because she doesn’t want to break his heart anymore than she already has. Hades is still on his power trip for sure and relishes telling Persephone to stay out of it and telling Orpheus about his deal with Eurydice. Eurydice has to be physically ripped away from Orpheus for the fight scene and you can see how much her heart is breaking thinking about what Orpheus might think of her now. OKAY AND THE FIGHT SCENE, I’ve heard criticisms of it for being cheesy but I honestly think it’s really well choreographed and engaging. It’s not just the workers mindlessly beating up Orpheus as I previously thought, most of it is in retaliation to Orpheus trying to get back to Eurydice or make his way up to Hades (I guess to fight him which would be HILARIOUS) Persephone and Eurydice are both watching and the powerlessness of the female characters definitely comes back as a theme.

Nothing Changes: Harmonies!!! Acapella!! This is such a short song with such little staging that I don’t have much else to say than these women’s voices are incredible.

If It’s True: At the beginning of the song Eurydice reluctantly joins the workers and looks away from Orpheus as he sings the song, which clearly hurts Orpheus. He starts at such a low place but his process of inspiring the workers and exposing the truths of Hades’ façade is sooo well done and I love the response from the workers. This song is such a good turning point for Orpheus of realizing the world is shitty but also realizing there are more concrete ways to change the world and change people than just writing songs. Also this is a recurring theme in each song but AMBER’S FACE JOURNEY DURING THIS SONG. In this version of the show, Persephone actually knowing who Orpheus is adds a new urgency and purpose to her pity for him which I love (more on that in the next song.)

How Long?: Hi as everyone’s favorite How Long? Stan™️ I was SO THRILLED WITH EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS PERFORMANCE. Amber and Patrick are just so fucking good at understanding what drives their characters it’s insane. The staging is basically just them on either side of the lift (which is under the stage at this point) with a literal chasm between them as fog pours on the stage. Patrick barked out some of his lines in the intro as if he was insecure and threatened by Orpheus and Persephone’s investment in Orpheus which was a new layer I hadn’t considered. I think older versions of this song have been more conceptual and less urgent; Persephone used to be arguing for the concept Orpheus represented (love, freedom, idealism) but now her argument is deeply personal after a whole show of watching Orpheus fall in love with Eurydice, toast her bringing summer back, and suffer in Hadestown. She really plays it as Persephone’s last stand and that if Hades doesn’t relent, he stands no chance of getting her back emotionally. And Hades is SO STUBBORN AND SMUG up until Persephone pulls the “just as long as I am your wife,” at which point he realizes just how endangered his marriage is. The final chorus is just so heartbreaking as they realize how irreconcilable they are but how desperately they love each other anyways.

Chant (Reprise): The shortest summary of this is Hades Has Feelings And Hides Them Under A Power Trip x20 ft. UNIONIZING. Hades really feels like he’s lost control over Persephone, the workers, and himself and has to flex on Orpheus by belittling him and Persephone as well as building his ego up. So yeah, not a great look but damn is it fun to watch. The workers rising up is so good, they’re doing their work when they suddenly start breaking off and questioning the status quo. Persephone is also seething the whole song and just extremely pissed off that Hades is reacting like this after she tried to talk some sense into him. But as for her verse (RIP in peace), as much as I love it, I didn’t miss it all that much seeing it live. I actually didn’t even th ink about it until a few hours after the show. I think the song is stronger with it, but now I guess I can see why they cut it? BUT BOY OH BOY WAS I NOT READY FOR THE MOMENT™️. The lights of Hadestown get so bright you can’t even look at them and “I conduct the electric city!” is so LOUD you feel it in your bones and then everything is dark. It’s such an indescribable moment live and is also Hades’ most arrogant moment in the show which is Fun considering he’s about to get emotionally rekt.

Epic III: NO SONG HIT ME HARDER THAN THIS SONG. Some details from the beginning I loved was Eurydice grabbing Orpheus’ hand and giving him A Look showing how much she believes in him and his song, and how nervous Orpheus was at first with the high stakes. But as soon as the la la las started I was TOAST. It was clearly the last thing Hades was expecting to hear and shook him to his core. Amber started crying as soon as they started, and her “let him finish Hades” was so soft and sad. Also Orpheus is looking at Eurydice during the whole “it was like you were holding the world when you held her” bit which is just as painful as it sounds. You can just see Hades’ whole world he’s built coming down around him as the music swells and he and Orpheus go up on the lift and THE NOTEEE. It’s as perfect live as it is in audios. Also the workers individually standing up and taking off their skullcaps is such a good touch. But seriously I could not take my eyes off Amber this whole song, she was crying almost as hard as I was tbh. When the song slows down and we get to “where is the treasure inside your chest?” Orpheus is clearly just reading Hades so hard, and Hades is just slowly walking over to Persephone without breaking eye contact. Hades’ la la la is so so so soft and barely a whisper, but Persephone just breaks down as he takes her hands. The moment is so tender and well acted I nearly died seeing it I swear. PLUS HE PULLS OUT THE FLOWER!!! CINEMATIC PARALLELS!!!

Lover’s Desire: I loveee the new instrumental for this and the use of the la la las. I always expected the dance to be extremely tender and reverential which it somewhat was but I was SO pleasantly surprised by how FUN it was. They had their emotional moment at the end of Epic III but this really just shows you what they were like when they were young, you just watch them and think about how much fun they must have had years ago. They’re smiling and teasing each other the whole time until they end with Persephone’s head in Hades’ shoulder and stay that way all through Promises.

Promises: This song is way more happy than it has any right to be considering it made me cry again. Eurydice is so in awe of how Orpheus brought the gods back together and they strip away every promise of finery and security and just relish in how much they love each other plainly. Also the workers are on the side the whole time, Afra and John are clinging to each other and so are Ahmad and Kimberly, but with Timothy hugging the both of them. Eurydice actually directs her line “I don’t know where this road will end, but I’ll walk it with you hand in hand” tot he workers and goes down the line grabbing their hands and singing to them individually. And the vows at the end!!!! That’s always been one of my favorite parts of the show and they delivered so well. Orpheus lays everything out on the table and gives Eurydice the choice of whether or not she wants to stay with him, and I love the fact that he does this after he literally came down to the underworld for her. He recognizes that he fucked up and she doesn’t owe him coming back with him, but she reassures him of how much she loves him right away. They can’t tear themselves away from each other when they ask Hades if they can go, and when he says “I don’t know” Persephone pulls away with the most betrayed look on her face :(

Word to the Wise: I have nothing to say except the Fates are perfect and have never let me down.

His Kiss, The Riot: Patrick’s portrayal of Hades’ inner conflict in this song…. *chefs kiss* The way he stares at the flower as a symbol of Orpheus and love and redemption but can’t make himself surrender to it completely… The “all my children” verse really makes you feel like he thinks he’s helping the workers. Also I love the way he shouts “who makes WORK for idle hands.” It’s just such a good villain song, especially when the cacophony of instruments swell around him so eerily. He sings the final part of this song straight to Hermes, almost like he’s hoping he’ll give some input but Hermes is tragically confined to his position as the messenger. Also the way he looks straight at Persephone during “nothing makes a man so bold”….

Wait for Me (Reprise): The way Hermes delivers their instructions at the beginning is so resignedly sad like you can tell he knows what’s going to happen but is trying to give them hope :( They just want to make it out together so badly, but you can already tell Orpheus’ anxiety and doubt is kicking in. Not sure if this was intentional, but the staging of Orpheus and Eurydice at the front of the stage singing the wait for me melody and looking up at the audience reminded me of A Gathering Storm; instead of facing off against the literal storm, they’re preparing to face off the mental storm to come. The workers are so desperate for them to make it out, the “show the way” bit is so impassioned and breaks my heart. AND THEN HADES AND PERSEPHONEEE. They start on opposite ends of the stage and make their way to each other as they sing, and then come closer until they’re holding hands but then the turntable turns them apart. This scene just perfectly shows how much they’ve both grown throughout the show and how they know that their love isn’t perfect, but all they can do is try. The entire cast harmonizing on the wait for me melody at the end is SO transcendentally beautiful, and then Eva jumps in and belts for the GODS!! I love this number so much, especially how the workers and Persephone are so emotionally invested in their success but in the end Orpheus and Eurydice are just left alone.

Doubt Comes In: This song is BRILLIANTLY staged and I’m so glad Rachel Chavkin has her damn Tony. The whole stage is dark and filled with fog and you really feel how lonely and scary it must seem, especially with the sinister music and malicious singing from the Fates. Eurydice is in our view at the beginning and when she is singing, but other than that, Orpheus is literally walking this road alone. Reeve does such a great job conveying not only how anxious Orpheus is but exactly why he is anxious, and it’s SO hard to watch especially compared to how optimistic he was at the start of the show. As they reach the end, the walls begin to close back up and cover the lights of Hadestown, and then It Happens and my heart just DROPS. The light flash back on and illuminate everything so horribly- it takes so long for either of them to even form words as they realize what happened. When Eurydice drops she drops FAST and it’s so viscerally upsetting watching her go down as Orpheus runs to her. His face absolutely shatters :(( also my mom and her friend had no idea how it ended and they were so shocked and upset lmao.

Road to Hell (Reprise): Andre takes a really long time to just take everything in and let the audience react before he even starts with “aight.” He walks all the way over to the pit and looks down at where Eurydice was for a long time, and Orpheus is just sitting there shell shocked and gutted. The whole first half of this song is just so slow and purposeful, recycling the motifs from Road to Hell and then you finally get what they mean by “it’s a sad song, but we sing it anyways.” The catharsis I felt seeing Eurydice come out for “anybody got a match?” and Persephone rising up on the lift to symbolize spring coming back with a look on her face that I can only describe as tired but grateful was so strong. Andre carries this finale so beautifully and the swelling music and harmonies just make me CRY. The song ends with Orpheus coming out again in his apron with a smile on his face which is so lovely.

We Raise Our Cups: This song just grounds the whole show and gives Persephone (and Eurydice) the chance to reflect on the show’s themes of love and perseverance which I adoree. Amber’s voice is so lovely and this is such a perfect reciprocation of Livin it up on Top and just made me so happy :’)

[celawrites]

Day 21

The sun’s hues blind me while I type. But if I were any other basic person, I would take a selfie and bask in the sun. Too bad I’m not. I stretch and head out of my car. It’s currently 7:07 and since I had a good rest on the car, I settle for continuing the story on school grounds.

Madison is there when I head over to my usual seat. I move out of the way and let her stay there. I was here to type and manifest ideas, not deal with her shenanigans.

“So” She sneers. “How’d you do it?”

I ignore her. Some days I wish I could block people irl. Well, I guess murder works as well but I mean too many legal issues. A restraining order? She hasn’t done anything bad to me though.

“I asked you a question bitch”

I continue typing. I’m rather glad that I’m currently typing an analysis on a love rival, this is actually the perfect material for the new character.

“All you ever do is stay silent and type. What happened to that strong persona you have when he’s around huh? You haven’t changed one bit” she snickers.

I spare her a glance and continue typing.

“Not gonna answer me huh? Tell me. How many of them did you sleep with you slut,” She hisses out. “There’s no way any of them would befriend you after the rumor that surfaced about you”

My hands remain busy on my keyboard as I give her the only reply she’s getting. “Is that all?”

“What do you mean? Tsk. So you admit that you seduced half of the school into voting for you?”

In my mind, I snort at her assumptions, but I ignore her words. The sun is already in the sky by now, and Sun should be joining us any moment.

“Just so you know, I actually am Serenity. And I will not hesitate to send my fanbase after you and ruin your life. So I suggest that you stay away from what’s mine”

“So I’m an object now?” Sun walks over to us.

“Ah, good morning darling!” Madison beams, a fake one, you can kind of tell how her arms are tense.

“Good morning Sun, took you longer than usual”

“There was a little traffic on the freeway. Good morning Madison” he nods and settles down next to me. “What’s today’s prompt?”

“Antagonist design. I’m pretty happy with how it turned out.” Despite Sun not knowing who I was, he still knew that I had a passion for writing.

“Mm.”

“Hey darling. Do you want a signed book from me? I’m hosting a fan-sign soon and you seemed pretty invested in the book last year.”

“Serenity doesn’t host fan-signs. For all we know, she could be a he, and they could be an old woman in her forties. So no.” Sun sighs.

“Stop frowning, you’re gonna get wrinkles.” I hum, noticing how he creased his eyebrows.

“Says the one with permanent eyebags”

“So which cafe are you guys headed to this Friday? I wanna join you guys!” Madison is glowing, I kind of need medicine or something, she’s too fake.

Sun and I both remain silent. Madison shuffles uncomfortably in her seat and Sun leans over and reads my analysis to ignore her. “Vinicia. A woman known for her charms, she owns one of the largest underground empires in the city. Constantly picking a fight with Seph. She controls almost every high-level street fighter possible”

He hums. “Known for being an angel in real life. Constantly helping out anyone and everyone, only a few know how two-sided she is. Sounds familiar”

“Does it? I was just thinking about every other basic antagonist”

“Not in-depth enough. Why is she that way? Is she bored? Does she want to avenge someone? And also, what’s her empire called? What does it consist of? Is she really as innocent as she makes up? Does she have any hints that you can tell that she isn’t?” Sun points out.

“It’s only the early stages Sun. It’s not like I have a deadline for these prompts”

“True huh” I do have a deadline, and the deadline is in a week. I was supposed to turn in all my character plans for my next book yesterday, but things happened and I was given another week.

“So Madison.” I hum. “What’s your next book going to be about?”

She tenses, and at this point, there are multiple students around who are also curious. “A-ah. I posted it on my blog a little while back! It’s about love. But you know, there’s also an antagonist and stuff”

I hum, and Sun snickers. “Serenity doesn’t give such vague answers. If you’re going to pretend to be her, then at least play the part. Her next work is on magic”

“B-but I am Serenity! So what if I tend to overshare on the internet? You guys can just get all of this information on my blog!” Madison stammers out.

The first bell saves her from any more questions, and everyone scrambles to get ready for class. I text Sun the answer to one of the math questions as my confession today and snicker when he flushes red. ( i < 3u )

The day passes like normal, and when Sun runs up to me after school, I’m more than confused.

“cRESS”

“What’s wrong Sun?”

“Take me out”

“With a gun or on a date?”

“Either. I’m tired and I don’t want to go on a date with Madison”

“PFft.”

“sUN~” Madison runs over and Sun speeds himself to the front seat. I laugh and slip in myself. A knock is heard on the window and Sun opens the window. His hand is in mine, a habit that I let him develop because of his anxiety. I rub soft circles on his hand, and though we’re not dating, at this point we could be friends with benefits but only benefits of cheesy stuff.

“Is something wrong?”

“So what about our date?”

“I’m already hanging out with Cress today.”

“Can I join in? It’s not a date right?”

“ah-”

“It’s a date” both Madison and I look at him in shock. EXCUSE ME? I DID NOT AGREE TO FAKE DATE YOU IDIOT HOW DARE YOU. HOW DARE YOU TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME CRUSHING ON YOU FOR THIS I DIDN’T AGREE TO THIS HISSS.

Sun shrugs and motions for me to drive. Deciding to be cheeky, I grin. “I’ll tell you if he’s a good kisser later Madison! See you!” I step on the gas and leave.

“I hate you” I mumble.

“You’re in love with me” Sun hums.

“And you’re being a jerk by playing me”

He remains quiet for a bit. “I panicked. I’m sorry”

I remain quiet and opt to drive to an empty parking lot instead.

“You owe me a 3am McDonalds run now”

“Alright. What are we doing here anyways?”

“I need vibes. I can’t type without them. If you have any questions or need anything, feel free to swap seats with me and drive there” I hum.

“Alright”

He’s quiet until he catches me off guard with a question.

“So you think I’m a good kisser?”

I choke. whERE THE FUCK IS THAT COMING FROM?

“W-what?” I cough.

“You said you’d tell Madison if I was a good kisser or not”

“I mean I had to think of something cheeky to say. You’d be sorely wrong if you think I’d let an opportunity like that slip by.”

“So you didn’t want to kiss me?” He smirks.

“You’ve never kissed someone before. You’d be sorely wrong if you think I’d agree”

“Says the one who’s never dated someone before”

“I’m hURT”

The bantering goes on until it’s nearing 4pm, and I drive him home. His brother is quick to ask me for the details but I only tell him that we hadn’t done anything except correct my horrible grammar on my stories. Z only huffs.

The rest of the day passes silently, and my home is quiet as usual. Nighttime approaches, and I’m in bed again.

Previous : Masterlist : Next

[stellalucem]

Five times + Waited (Tseng/Sephiroth)

meme.

five times drabbles

@bloodlot   //  selectively accepting !

__

He’s not used to the circuitous labyrinth of cubicles within the Department of Administrative Research. It’s been nearly a year, and still he finds himself incurably lost within the grey walls that all look the same, high enough to obscure any landmarks that might help orient himself. It doesn’t help that he’s half-panicked at his own tardiness, exacerbating his confusion.

And of all the sights he expects within the confines of his own cubicle, it is not the crumpled form of Sephiroth in unraveled repose upon a metal folding chair by his desk, hand on his temple to ward away the garish fluorescent light that assaults his eyes. 

“You’re late,” he points out without removing the shield of his eyes to look at him, and the young Turk flushes red-raw.

It isn’t the first impression he wants to make. 

__

His office is pristine. Everything in meticulous order. Even the mountain of paperwork is in neat, manageable piles. Not even a pen out of place.

For all his life’s work, there has never been a single thing Tseng has ever earned for himself. Every meal he put on his populous family’s table has been least of all his, every space permeated with relatives that can barely leave him a moment’s peace. His work with the infantry, in the Wutai conflict, and even his work with the Turks has been an exercise in coordination and collaboration, with little distinction of his own personal efforts. So when he’s granted an office of his own, it is a boon he doesn’t quite understand. 

And neither do some of the other Turks, who don’t understand how someone with such little seniority can deserve the attention of Veld, or the assignment of Sephiroth, both of whom were likely instrumental in securing the office and Tseng’s position. But their doubt only makes Tseng want to hold on to what he’s earned that much more, delight in it that much deeper. This space is a gift, for someone who has never known the recognition of his merits until now. Nothing has ever been solely his. Not his time, not his efforts. So he’ll treasure it. And show his appreciation where he can.

So when Sephiroth appears within the threshold of his door, there’s fresh-brewed coffee waiting for him within a cafetière à piston, cream and sugar beside it, and a new pillow set upon the wingback chair for his comfort when the general will inevitably fall asleep, and an extra chenille blanket stashed away in his closet.

“Welcome home,” he greets him, standing to receive him, and the rare smile he wears is warmer than the summer sun. 

__

His coffee’d gone cold an hour and a half  ago, but it sits untouched behind the collection of water glasses he’s already drained while he waits.

He’s half sure Sephiroth’s forgotten. After all, they’d made plans to meet on their one mutual day off this month, for a real cup of coffee and conversation that doesn’t involve debriefings or dossier recapitulations. Something that resembles real interaction. But that had been over three weeks ago, before he’d been deployed on his latest mission. Nearly an age. for how much had likely happened between then and now. 

And while he knew that the general had returned two days ago, he also knew that Sephiroth was likely to be recuperating still, likely distracted and tired. It’s a well-deserved respite, of course, but a poor consolation. But it’s a consolation nonetheless that he stubbornly ascribes to as he drinks his cold black coffee with a nebulous sort of defeat. 

He’s a little too used to being forgotten. 

__

They’d lost contact four hours and forty-two minutes ago. The last communication from the handler had been to relay the successful infiltration of the Crescent Stronghold, but nothing since to confirm the presence of the warlord they’d been keeping eyes on, or their success. Or failure. And while the absence of communication with the handler was disturbing, it was still in line with protocol. What wasn’t was the conspicuous absence of communications with the black hawks and their operators meant to provide both eyes and backup should anything go wrong. 

They were in complete dark about the mission. And subsequently, Sephiroth.

Tseng’s  knee bounces furiously under the table, a sure sign of his nervousness that everyone assumes is impatience. He taps at the receiver in his ear, rubs at his mouth to prevent the vicious chewing of his bottom lip, but he knows he looks a disaster, if the wary looks of the surrounding agents are anything to trust.

But the doors open and a bloodied Sephiroth emerges like a chthonic god, silver hair in disarray, a single glove lost, his scintillant eyes searching immediately for Tseng. The Turk lets out a strangled sigh and snatches him by the collar, pulling him closer than the two have ever been before. “Don’t you dare tell me to stand down again,” he hisses through the dam of his teeth. “If you go out there, I want to be by your side. I can’t … I can’t sit around here not knowing what’s happened to you.”

When Sephiroth smiles, he’s not quite sure why. 

__

Sephiroth isn’t quite asleep, in spite of the languid way he’s draped over the edge of Tseng’s desk. Tseng is sat opposite of him, writing something lengthy with a steady hand, and his face is serene as he methodically completes his task. Rapt enough that he doesn’t quite look up when Sephiroth rises to round the table and stand by his side, his fingers threading carefully through his heavy hair. 

“I’m almost done,” Tseng promises, and Sephiroth does not wait for that to be true for a second when he perches himself firmly upon his desk.

Tseng grins and flicks his gaze up to meet Seph’s mild, inquisitive expression. “I mean it. Almost done.” 

He scribbles something else in margin of a report, then shifts over to the sticky-note pad and scrawls “brat” on it with an even hand, and slaps it unceremoniously upon Seph’s thigh. 

Seph says nothing, doesn’t even bother moving the reports and papers out the way when he shifts over atop them, his thighs uncrossing, legs open, finding a toehold upon the edge of Tseng’s chair as his feet bracket his form. 

Tseng, for his part, ignores the distraction and manages to make a final mark in his report over Sephiroth’s thigh. “One last—” but Seph shoves him back smoothly with a firm hand, and pins him to the chair with a boot to his chest. 

His elbow propped upon the bend of his knee, his curling fingertips hiding the twitch of a grin upon his pale lips, Sephiroth continues to regard him with the circumspection of a cat. 

Tseng grins as he only can around Sephiroth, holds his hands up in surrender. “Alright. You win. Should we pick up takeout on the way home?”  He loosens the knot of his tie, and undoes the top button. “Unless you had something else in mind.”

[missiekatjie]

[FFVII] She didn’t realize it was a date.

Paintings hung on the tiny apartment’s walls depicted starry night skies, military transports, and koi. As Sephiroth browsed in silence, Amy scurried to what served for her kitchen to set her sequined clutch on the counter.

A black cat stared out at the scene from the short hallway that lead to the rest of the apartment.

“Have you considered selling some of your work?” Sephiroth glanced over his shoulder to the younger woman, who was doing her best not to trip over the cat that had decided her being in the kitchen meant it was mealtime. The sequined dress gave her little room for high-stepping around the mewling critter.

“I’ve sold a few pieces here and there, but I don’t have the time to dedicate to that,” she admitted. “Shoo, Clawdia, shoo.”

Her guest chuckled and shook his head. He’d shoved his hands into his trouser pockets, and next thing he knew he felt the bump of a headbutt against his leg.

“That is unfortunate.”

“I’m more-or-less on-call. By now, Shinra’s usually called me a bunch of times with requests or demands or ‘Oh, can you cancel that meeting I have in the morning I hate those guys’. That sort of sh-- thing,” Amy said. She paused to peer at Sephiroth as he crouched down to scritch behind her cat’s ears.

“Hm. I wonder why he refrained from doing any of that this eve,” the SOLDIER casually wondered aloud, and the younger woman turned toward him and planted her hands on her hips. His brows arched as he tried to hide his amusement. “Is something wrong?”

“You really pulled out all the stops on tonight, didn’t you?” She asked. She crossed the floor, attempted to crouch across from him to join in giving Clawdia attention, then stopped short -- the dress didn’t allow for much movement, either. She leaned against the arm of her couch, instead.

“I simply wished for a pleasant evening with no interruptions. The one benefit of my position is that I usually get what I ask for in that regard.” Sephiroth stood, then, and went to sit down -- though he gently pulled his host along with him. She plopped back into her seat with a soft ‘oof’.

Amy snorted laughter. “I never understood it. You’ve the pick of whoever you want to spend time with, and you decide to take the president’s secretary out for dinner. You offer her -- me -- a life away from here. But you don’t expect anything in return?”

The silver-haired man closed his eyes and shook his head. “I expect nothing in return. I have few real friends, Amy, and you have been consistently kind without prompting. How long did it take you to realize my position within the organization?” Sephiroth’s brow arched with that question and Amy felt her cheeks burning.

“Don’t remind me! Everybody thinks I live under a rock.”

“Oh? Do you?”

More snorted laughter. He stretched his arm out behind her, across the back of the couch, and offered a faint smile.

“I am curious as to why you would choose to relocate to the north,” he said. Amy’s response was a light shrug.

“I’ve never really been outside Midgar. I want to see something different, I want to see snow, I want to know what it’s like to sit by a roaring fire with a hot drink in the middle of a blizzard.” Her grin was broad, excited. Sephiroth’s head tilted slightly as he listened. “I wanna raise cold-weather chocobos or something. Paint whenever I want to -- not have to answer any phones. Ever. Again.”

It was one of the few times she’d ever heard her guest laugh, even if it was quiet. It was one of the few times someone actually paid attention to what she was saying, listened carefully, reacted favourably. She tried to tuck a strand of chin-length hair behind her ear, but it wouldn’t stay.

“That does, admittedly, sound pleasant. No president to tell you what to do, no Hojo to leer at you from the elevator,” the SOLDIER replied. He tucked those stray strands back for her, and it seemed he didnt’ realize he’d done it until she was sitting there sputtering at him.

“I apologize. It was an automatic reaction,” he said, his voice gentle, and Amy exclaimed, “It’sfine! Anyway, it’s getting late and I have to be up early for work tomorrow-- thank you for walking me home.”

“It was my pleasure. I would like to do this again, sometime,” Sephiroth replied as he stood. Amy stared up at him with wide eyes.

“Really? I mean, yes! That would be great. Maybe something a little less formal?”

He chuckled and nodded. “Deal,” he said, and Amy stood to follow him to the door.

Just as he stepped out into the hallway, the younger woman blurted out, “Wait, Seph--”

“Yes?” He paused, glancing back at her.

“You’re a good man and I’m happy to finally know you,” Amy said. “I know that’s gonna sound really silly, but--”

More chuckling, and he slowly shook his head. “No, no, it does not. Thank you, Amy, and goodnight.”

When she closed the door, Amy found herself leaning back against it, and she let out a breath she didn’t realize she was holding. “Holy shit,” she mumbled. “That was a date, wasn’t it? That was a fucking date. Oh my God.”

Clawdia just sat there, peeping, and Amy scurried off to get ready for bed. She was pretty sure she’d have too much on her mind to actually sleep.

December 14, 0002

Hey Seph.

I’m having trouble absorbing it. You, killed in action. That doesn’t seem real, doesn’t seem right. You’re the strongest they’ve got. How could you die? It’s not fucking fair, but here we are.

If I’d known that night was the last I’d see you alive-- okay, I don’t know what I’d do. Probably flip my shit. I’m not good at ‘calm’, okay? Maybe suggested running away. I know that’s not something you’d do, but I still wish I’d suggested it.

How crazy would that have been? Hey, Sephiroth, why don’t you run off to a ski resort and spend your life with a woman you barely know, in a place that’s always cold and snowy? Stupid, I know. Okay, you’d never have said that.

I don’t know what you did after you left but I got a deposit from your estate today. I guess I’m going north. I handed in my resignation this morning.

I just wanted you to know that.

Maybe I’ll become a famous artist, and if I do, I’ll have you to thank. So. Wherever you are. Thanks.

I’m just sorry we couldn’t get to know each other better.

- Amy

[anne-aerwyna]

Anne ~ Chapter 10

Anne’s Travel Journal - Day 3

Good morning, journal! At least I think it's morning. My body clock is telling me that it is, but it's not easy to tell the actual time from inside of a cave. I didn't realize it last night, because it was dark out, but natural light is almost nonexistent in here. The lamps are the only source of light until you reach the Crossing’s entry room. I slept like a rock, which is probably a side effect of sleeping in a cave. Now that I'm refreshed, I'm can be a lot more observant than I was last night. The walls of this room have lots of scratches and smooth patches in it, meaning that it was probably dug out by a burrowing monster instead of created naturally. I paced the room to measure it; it's about 18 paces long and 15 paces wide. The ceiling is domed and the walls gently curve outwards. The floor is entirely flat, but I guess that's because of Mr. and Mrs. Slater and not because of the original inhabitant. In fact, looking closer, the stone patches in the floor are a different color than the stone that makes up the walls and ceiling. Kinda neat. I'm too hungry to spend any more time in here though; I can smell breakfast from through the air slits and I'm hungrier than a Deviljho. I need to consume.

It turns out that Aptonoth is actually very good eating. Breakfast was steaming Aptonoth steak, some delicious Aptonoth cheese, and fresh brown bread with Nulberry jam. The bread reminded me a lot of Ethan and his mom. I hope they're doing okay. I ate with Dawn and the carriage driver, whose name is Adam. Dawn didn't have much to say so I'm guessing she's not much of a morning person. I'm filing that information away in the Operation Roommate Dawn drawer in my head. Adam had enough to say about today's plans, so we never had any awkward silences. Today's agenda looks like this: we get in the carriage, go down the other side of this mountain range, go through a forest, go up and down some hills, and then arrive at Maerinia. How exciting! We're only a hop, a skip, and a jump away from our goals. I wonder if that's how a Tetsucabra feels when it’s fighting a hunter. We're making a calculated jump, but even a calculated jump can turn into a blind leap if you lose sight of the ground. That means that if I keep my eyes on my goal, my leap towards my dreams won't fail!...maybe that analogy is too complicated. I still need to pack all of my things though, so I will write again after I take care of that.

I'm writing from the carriage now. After I got all of my things together there was no time to write, because Adam knocked on my door to tell me that we were leaving. We said goodbye and thank you to Mr. and Mrs. Slater, got in the carriage, and now we're headed down the mountain on a path that looks about identical to the one that we came up yesterday. There's not much to see or write about, so I'll talk to Dawn instead and come back when there's something interesting happening.

We are officially off of the mountain. It was the most boring part of this trip so far... all we saw was gray rocks and gray boulders and gray gravel. Dawn became a little more talkative as the morning went on. We are in a much more familiar area to both of us now - a forest. We're still riding downwards on a slope, but the slope is gradually becoming flatter as we roll along. It's nice to see birds again, after being stuck in those dull mountains for so long. Dawn brightened up too, and I've already learned the names of at least eight different birds since we entered this forest. We also saw a Mosswine and some Kelbi, which brings back memories of home. Luckily I'm way too excited for what's coming to be homesick. As we travel through the forest I'm getting peeks of sparkling blue through the trees - the ocean is close! I'm excited to feel the breeze on my face and smell the sea air. I would ask Dawn how she feels about the ocean but it looks like she's distracted right now... oh, apparently she saw something in the trees that she wants to investigate. What could it be?

We stopped for a second to check it out, but we're back on the trail again. Dawn claimed that she saw a small Flying Wyvern sneaking between the trees, and when we went to the spot where she saw it we found a fresh footprint! The monster was nowhere to be found, but it's still exciting. The only Flying Wyvern I've ever seen in real life is Seph, and I'm looking forward to seeing all the different body types and hunting styles! Nargacuga has a very different body structure compared to most Flying Wyverns, according to Dawn. Nargacuga has a similar build to the Tigrex, and is very different to Rathalos. I've heard stories of the fearsome Tigrex, with its blue and orange coloring and its habit of reckless charging, but I never really tried to imagine what one looks like! I'm trying to imagine a blue and orange Nargacuga right now, and I can't help laughing when I put that image in my head. I told Dawn what I was thinking about and I got her to smile, which is the most you can really get out of her as far as happiness is concerned. It looks like the trees are thinning out. I think we're near coming up to the edge of the forest! I can see a big blue expanse between the gaps in the trees. I'm going to have to stop writing as we leave the forest to take in the v

It was so breath-taking that I lost track of what I was writing. As soon as we got past the tree line, I saw the most beautiful view I've ever seen. The ocean. In all of its sparkling glory, the ocean stretched away as far as my eyes could see. The beach is still kind of far away, but from the top of this first hill we could see everything. Adam says that Maerinia will come into view soon. The last time my heart was beating this fast I was talking to Max and Aac. That city is the beginning of my new life, and Dawn's too! All we have to do is go down this hill, up and down another, enter the city, and then the next chapter of my life can officially begin! Speaking of these hills though, it's very interestingly populated. There are lots of Aptonoth, like in the fields before the mountain path, but there are also a good number of Jaggi, along with some monsters that look like thicker versions of Jaggi. I'll have to consult with Dawn about those. Because we first saw Jaggi in a rocky, mountainous area, it’s kinda weird seeing Jaggi living in this environment as well. Maybe this could just be their hunting grounds, because I don't see any dens nearby. The Aptonoth are on guard, and I'm not sure that a Jaggi can survive being rammed by that huge horn. I hope we get to watch a hunt.

Dawn says that the thick Jaggi are called Jaggia and that they are the female counterpart to Jaggi. They usually guard nests and dens but for some reason they are out in the field with the Jaggi today. Dawn guesses that they're moving location because they were kicked out by a rival pack. That makes sense to me, but I didn't see any signs of pack battles anywhere when we were on the mountain. The Jaggi are all in formation now, and they're circled around an Aptonoth that looks injured. It can’t walk or run, so it's just lying on the grass with its tail in a defensive position... oh no! The pack is closing in. I think this is the end for that Aptonoth.

It was over quickly. The first Jaggi jumped on the Aptonoths back, and then I had to look away. Something about watching that Aptonoth die didn't sit well with me, even after I said I wanted to watch a hunt. Now all of the Jaggi are happy and full though. It's the cruel circle of life. Adam says that in the next few minutes Maerinia should show up on our left. I can hardly wait! I can tell that Dawn is excited too - instead of reading her book she is looking for the city walls. I think I'll join her.

It's beautiful... absolutely gorgeous. We went over a hill and suddenly the Sapphire Port came into view. I caught my breath when I saw it; the seaside city is a mosaic of both white stone and tan brick houses, with roofs in every shade of blue. The roads are paved in cobbled stone ranging the same colors as the houses themselves. Seagulls float lazily on the breeze from the ocean and soar gently above the city itself, and the air smells like salt and adventure. I'm writing this as we're stopped at the city gates, waiting for entry. I’m sure none of us are carrying anything illegal, so this should be a quick and easy check. They're telling me to put away my journal though, so this paragraph is going to be cut short.

Like I said, a quick and easy check. We got inspected without trouble, and now they’re opening the heavy iron gate. Going through this gate feels like a rebirth. The carriage stop is right next to the main gate, so our ride is just about done. This is a travel journal, and the travel is over, for now, so I have to end this entry now, even though it’s the middle of the day. For now, I'm just excited to be here at my new home, with a new friend and a lot of stuff to get done.

- Anne

[ourfinalheaven]

I received a message from someone asking why I enjoy Cloti, but they wished to remain “anon”. 

I always feel like this question chokes me up because I’m not talented in expressing myself nor my emotions to others, but I figured I’d give it a try... 

For me, Cloud and Tifa is realistic to what couples go through where as other FF couples are, well, fantasy like. They’re easy, they’re in the “honeymoon phase” and they really don’t go through realistic to where it’s relate-able. Which don’t get me, it’s totally fine and isn’t that the point of shipping; to enjoy something you can’t really have in reality? 

Cloud’s story is such a normal one. I mean really c’mon? Young boy wants to impress the popular girl who he just so happens to have a crush on, but she’s always surrounded by boys who are more confident than he is? Then one day,he musters up some balls to call her out at night only to make an unexpected promise to help her if she’s in need? Totally relate able for a lot of guys in their early years. 

Tifa, like any girl would, reads the paper everyday to see if Cloud is in SOLDIER, and waits for his return. When word gets out there are people from SOLDIER coming to town, Tifa gets giddy to see Cloud, but only to be disappointed when he doesn’t show- or so she thinks. 

He hides his face in shame of not keeping his word and avoids her because of it. Little does Cloud know, at this point, all Tifa wants is to see Cloud. Things take turn for the worst, and a man Cloud looks up to destroys his town, kills his mother, hurts his best friend, and gravely injures the girl he likes.  All the anger Cloud felt in his childhood come rushing over him like a wave, and he himself is able to manage to take on this “great hero”, but pays a high price... he gets taken by Hojo to be a lab rat along with Zack. 

Five years later, Zack and him bust out of the Shinra Mansion basement only to lose Zack in the process, fighting the hang over of his mako poisoning he some how makes it to a train station in Midgar only to be found by Tifa. At this point, they’re both shocked they’ve crossed paths AGAIN. Talk about ironic or as some would say it was “fate”.  When Cloud is finally coherent, he asks Tifa for a job to make a living and tells her of stories that don’t quite make sense. Finally, when they reach Tifa’s bar Cloud realizes once again Tifa surrounded by men who clearly are fond of Tifa. 

For me personally, I feel like this is why Cloud is so “moody” in the beginning of the game. Once again, he has to fight for Tifa’s attention and that he doesn’t fit in with the new group she has. It’s almost like he’s resentful, which I find interesting tbh, anybody would. I’m sure we’ve all been there. We want undivided attention from our crush; anything to search for clues they just may like us back... 

Anyways,  one mission goes extremely south  and I find the dialogue between Cloud and Tifa interesting before he falls into Aerith’s church.  There’s a part of the dialogue that isn’t optional right before he falls (from my memory, been awhile since I played)

Barret It's gonna blow! Let's go, Tifa!

Tifa Barret! Can't you do something?

Barret Not a damn thing.

Tifa Cloud! Please don't die! You can't die! There's still so much I want to tell you!

Cloud ******I know, Tifa......*******

That right there signals to me there was something brewing between them that they both recognized. Cloud, not distracted by personal resentment of the past, was himself in that moment.  And like always, they’re interrupted.  Once again, something always getting in the way of them finally confessing their feelings.

When Cloud falls on Aerith’s flowerbed, there’s something I find interesting. He remembers his fall from Mt. Nibel. You know where the part he follows Tifa and the bridge snaps as a child?  That fall brings him back to that time. I mean it’s nothing to telling but it’s something I’ve made note of. 

Once Cloud and Aerith get of her church and he brings her back home safely, he is desperate to get back to Tifa’s bar. I think it’s cute you can call Tifa your “girl...friend”, I don’t think anyone else in the game has that option, so there’s like this build up between Cloud and Tifa that makes you want to know more. 

When Cloud does finally get to meet back up with Tifa, he went through a slew of embarrassing events to dress up like a woman just to make sure she was alright. Cloud is somewhat macho, so for him to slap a dress on, makeup, and a wig with some girly panties is truly telling to how much he cares for Tifa and would do anything to make sure she is alright.  

After several events of them leaving Midgar, the end of Cloud’s story is interesting. Tifa asks Cloud how badly she was hurt, and Cloud replies with he thought Tifa was a goner, but unprovoked he mentions how he was sadden by that thought. 

Now, let me fast forward to after Aerith death and their at the Northern Crater. Cloud mentions to Tifa that he hopes she gets to meet the “real” Cloud. It’s like Nojima wanted to insinuate that this Cloud we’re seeing a fake; not real. We end up getting separated from Cloud, but we find him Mideel where Cloud’s mental state is completely broken, and Tifa decides she’s going to watch over him thus leaving the group... 

When we finally get to the lifestream, that’s where we learn Cloud did what he did for Tifa. He likes Tifa and just wanted her to notice him. Cloud then find outs Tifa read the newspaper everyday searching for his name in it. Some people may think that’s “shallow” of Tifa but I don’t think so. She was just a girl, and at that age we get caught up in things like that.   

Cloud and Tifa finally realize Cloud was there and he saved Tifa, Cloud is able to regain his trueself thanks to Tifa.  Now what is interesting is Cloud, in the true memory, says to Seph  “ Mom... Tifa...... my town... give it back...” he never said that in his flash back at Kalm.  Nojima’s writing for the script references back the “hope you get to meet the real cloud” quote and ofc when he says this is goodbye, until meet again line, “ Yeah...... Tifa...... We finally...... meet again......” This lets us know, the Cloud we knew before, wasn’t 100% Cloud which is so, idk, it’s so realistic bc people in real life will take parts of other people’s personality and morph them into one to great “their” personality. 

 Alrighty, so with the highwind scene, I find it super classic how Square did a romantic setting with Cloud and Tifa before the final battle. You know how you hear about soldiers making love to their wives before their deployed or in movies the hero makes love to his girl before he fights the villain? I feel like thats what Square did. People will fight about how this HW scene is canon, but I don’t think it matters. The Highwind scene is the Highwind scene, Cloud and Tifa spend the night together. Period. They share a kiss/have sex/ play a card game w/e you want to imagine, they spent a romantic night under the stars before the went to fight Seph. To be honest, it was the perfect night for them to come clean. What would they have to lose? They thought they were gonna die anyways.  

They beat seph, yay game over, woot now we have COT and ACC, which really gives the realness. 

I really can see how cloti struggled with their relationship because the events they went through was awful. They’re still mourning over their fallen comrade: Aerith. Cloud is feeling guilty for their deaths. In what reality would this make for the most perfect relationship? It doesn’t, but I feel given the hints and body language cloti is forming a romantic relationship, which is hard for them. You have two people who have pent up emotions from the OG events. 

They seem to be going through their pain together but dont if that makes sense? Best way I can describe it is Tifa takes Denzel coming to the bar as Aerith showing her to  move on, but Cloud takes it as Aerith showing Cloud by raising Denzel, he can make up for his mistakes. Eventually after COT, Cloud and Tifa DO end up happy together with the children. 

However, Cloud gets geostigma and he thinks this is the planet’s way of “punishing him” so he runs off, abandoning everyone at this point, and lives in hiding.   Eventually, Tifa does find where Cloud is staying at and finally getting Cloud to realize it’s time he lets go of the past. Some people will say, “Oh Tifa’s a “bitch” for doing that, but you know what? No, she’s not. You don’t coddle your partner for forever. In relationships, there’s times you have to give your partner a reality check. It’s called tough love. There’s a time where you tell your partner it’s time to stop feeling sorry for yourself and move on. You also don’t let your partner cut off everyone because he/she is too scared to ask for help or see they have people who dearly love him.  

A lot of people who have never had a serious relationship do not realize that there’s times you hate your partner, you don’t know if you’re truly in love with this person anymore, you don’t open up to them, and you just think you’re better off without them. And that’s cloti in acc. They’re figuring it out. They’re pissy, they’re hurt, they’re tired, but you know what...they worked through it. They didn’t just bail and say “see ya later.”, Tifa waited for Cloud to forgive himself, and when he did look where he went? Back to tifa and the children. 

I honestly think that’s why people struggle with shipping cloti is they think or maybe don’t understand when you love someone, they annoy you, make you mad, make you cry, and sometimes don’t understand you, but it’s loving you through those bad times that make you stronger. And maybe that’s why it’s easier to ship other couples is because reality is uncomfortable and we are raised to think everything is rainbow and butterflies x.x 

Phew, this was long >.<  So yeah, TL;DR I love cloti bc they’re real and not your typical FF couple, like Cecil x Rosa or Squall x Rinoa where you don’t see the “Realness”. I feel like Cloti is that couple that isn’t on social media showing pictures of how “happy” they are when in reality they’re miserable, but the couple who keeps their relationship to themselves bc they don’t need to showcase it >.<

[secret-engima]

Okay, now I'm imagining one of the 'verses that Zack-Noctis, Aerith-Luna, and Cloud-Prompto (+Ignis and Gladio) trip into, is an /FF7/ verse. When Cloud was just a cadet and Zack was /even more/ of a hyperactive puppy.

hgfdhgf TOTAL CHAOS.

Adorable Chaos.

Gonna just yet the ff7 timeline into the stratosphere because I Do What I Want for this. But basically this is a Happy Ending AU were Stuff Happened so that Gen never degraded/defected, Angeal never defected, Seph is mentally stable, and while Shinra is still a thing to be dealt with at least nobody is calling down meteors on anything else. Cloud is a little Cadet person who accidentally caught Genesis’s eye and so is not the Poet’s apprentice, and Zack is as hyper as ever.

...

-The five of them trip into the FF7 verse and we’ll make them teenagers and stuff for this, Noctis (15), Luna (19), and Prompto (15) all insta-recognize it and freak. Ignis (17) and Gladio (18) take their cue from the freaking and are very cautious. They don’t ask why the three know so much about this strange place or are so agitated but Ignis is Fussing and Gladio is ready to hit something. Luna softly says hey’ll just- have to avoid “everyone important” and the Astrals will undo this as soon as they can.

-Their luck being what it is, they are somewhere in the slums of Midgar and while killing monsters for gil to stay somewhere that isn’t an alley for the night (WHY DO THE MONSTER BODIES DISAPPEAR Ignis hisses the first time the monster he was inspecting for potential recipe material disappeared into thin air, leaving coins and junk behind), they hear someone else fighting monsters and having Trouble.

-Reacting on their Good Guy instincts, they race around the corner and find a Whopping Freaking Behemoth growling it’s way through a street way too small for it, chasing two someones that Noctis doesn’t really pay attention too in his haste to fling a fireball in the Behemoth’s face to slow it down. The beast slows and Cloud rockets by, his sword a flash of silver light as he hops up the dingy wall and somehow (Nif experimentation strength, adrenaline, and magic) beheads the thing in one massive strike (Gladiolus, watching from the entrance of the street where he’s guarding Ignis, Luna, and the people that Behemoth was chasing, quickly acknowledges his jealousy and lets it go, because Prompto is just Like That).

-Prompto lands on the dead body of the Behemoth and flicks the blood off his blade as he looks around (escaped experiment from the labs he’s betting, and the thought of it makes his blood feel very cold). Noctis nods grimly at him, coming to the same conclusion and reminder.

-Then, from the head of the alley, someone breathes, “That, was ... SO COOL.”

-Prompto, looking over Noctis’s head from his perch, goes dead white. Noctis knows what he’s going to see the moment he turns around but somehow can’t stop himself from looking anyway.

-Bright-faced and energetic, innocent in a way Noctis has never been able to fully pull off, is one SOLDIER Second Class Zack Fair, staring at the two of them with hero worship in his eyes as he dusts himself off and bounds past a startled Gladio to all but vibrate in front of Noctis and Prompto, “How’d you do that? You just- WHOOSH and SHING and it was DEAD. I didn’t think anyone but a SOLDIER First could do that!”

-While Noctis tries to wrap his head around himself (had he really been that hyper? No wonder Angeal called him Puppy), Prompto blinks past Zack (ghost ghost bloody-tired-ghost-rain-blood-steel-you-are-my-living-legacy-) he sees the second person standing there being fussed at by Ignis and almost loses his grip on his Fusion Sword.

-Cadet Cloud Strife is watching Ignis with a touch of hero worship in his own eyes as the older teen expertly applies a potion to the scratches and cuts, never letting on that he’s spotted the eerie similarities between Prompto, Noctis and these two strangers.

-Their attention is dragged back to Zack by his waving arms as he chatters a mile a minute, then rapidly snagged by the sound of approaching footsteps from the far end of the street, the direction the Behemoth had come from.

-Noctis already knows who is running around that corner. His nerve breaks and he BOLTS. Zack yips a protest as Noctis rushes by, Prompto on his heels, trying to escape before HE can come around the corner and see them. Gladio sees the look on his prince’s face and starts herding Iggy and Luna away-.

-Genesis rounds the bend in front of them the exact moment Angeal rounds the corner behind. Both of them having rushed to the scene to try to save their apprentices.

-Noctis can only hear static. It’s ... it’s different from seeing Angeal in his new body, his reborn self. This- this is a ghost of the man he adored and looked up to as a father, this is a perfect memory of the man he was forced to KILL. This is- this is ANGEAL. Noctis cannot deal.

-Ignis ends up doing all the talking on the group’s behalf while Zack makes things ... worse unintentionally by excitedly recounting the story of how Prompto one-shot the Behemoth.

-Genesis confirms it with Cloud.

-Both men, honorable in their own way, insist on paying for a Proper Hotel for the group as thanks, which means taking them above plate. Ignis makes up a story of how they are Hunters (which ... they are technically, just not in this world) and were just visiting the city when they heard the sounds of fighting.

-They get dropped off at the hotel and Noctis and Prompto spend a good hour sobbing in the bathroom over their respective ghosts while Luna hesitantly tries to explain why to Ignis and Gladio without ... SAYING why. After that, the group put their heads together to make a plan, because Noctis and Prompto are SURE that SHINRA will come sniffing around soon.

-By morning, Noctis and Prompto have composed themselves and gotten ... sorta enough sleep.

-Prompto is not surprised how, the moment the clock turns to “reasonable hour of the morning” there is a knock on the door. He is less surprised when he opens it to find a Turk on the other side.

-He promptly shuts the door again.

-He makes a rude gesture at Ignis’s back when the older teen sighs at his bad manners and opens the door to let the devil man in with a murmured apology and vague excuse that Prompto doesn’t handle mornings well. The Turk is Tseng, because of course it is, and he’s come to formally thank them for their assistance the other day in saving the lives of two of their employees (Read: here to investigate how a group of unknown teens showed up out of literal nowhere, how one of them used a fireball spell without seeming to have any materia on his person and how the twig-blond one-shot a Behemoth like a SOLDIER First).

-Ignis and Luna handle all the talking because Noctis is oddly quiet (afraid of being too like Zack), Prompto has gone straight non-verbal, and Gladiolus is a bit busy trying to keep his two friends on a sane keel.

-Tseng notices all of the interplay, but isn’t sure what to make of it. He notices the way the black haired one seems agitated in his presence and how the blond has flickering mako shine in his eyes as he folds in on himself and shuts down at the sight of Tseng’s suit. He notices he way Ignis and Gladio are neutral to him like true strangers would, but the gentle girl named Luna watches him with an old, eerie sort of knowing fondness.

-They are not what they seem, he thinks to himself.

-But what are they?

-Anyway long ficlet made slightly shorter, Tseng talks them into coming to the tower to receive a thank you gift from SHINRA and maybe give a demonstration to some of the cadets while they were at it, as a ... show and tell from an outsider perspective. They don’t have any choice but to agree, and Noctis shakes off his uneasiness to be a more muted version of energetic to help Prompto cope.

-The SOLDIER Firsts and their apprentices are there too, because of course they are, and Noctis slides into his element showing off for the cadets with Gladio’s help while Prompto spaces out at the nearest wall. Angeal comes over to talk to Noctis and thank him and stuff and Zack is already trying to acquire another blond buddy (Prompto slides back into non-verbal blank looks and is ... dimly surprised by Cloud coming to his defense with an innocent, “Take it easy, Zack, he’s shy.” before smiling. Prompto doesn’t remember smiling as Cloud. Not like that. Easy and friendly and innocent.)

-SOMEHOW. Genesis ends up picking a fight with Noctis. Because Genesis. Prompto, eager to burn off some tension, intercedes on Noctis’s behalf and ends up flattening Genesis in three moves.

-...Oops.

-Genesis gets up with a manic look in his eye and Sephiroth is staring like a cat that just spotted a bird. Angeal’s eyebrows are up to his hairline and Zack is “ooo”ing in awe.

-Genesis tries again, Prompto flattens him in five moves this time.

-Ignis steps in before a real fight can happen and politely excuses the group because they have places to be.

-Prompto has never been more grateful for Gentiana’s timing than the moment they step out of Shinra’s office and slide into the crowd. In between one heartbeat and the next, one shifting of the large, busy crowd and another, she arrives and whisks them home.

-The Turks have no idea how they lost the group of teens, but they never find them again.

[hadestownmodern]

Fight (2/?)

Hi! Here’s part two! You can find part one here

-Danielle            

------------

  “This is ridiculous.” Persephone paces back and forth across the empty bar, a force of anger and unruly curls. Junie lay asleep upstairs with Orpheus, who’d asked to take her for the night to keep him company. She’d pictured him doting on her, singing her special bedtime song and tucking her in with a kiss on the cheek and his forehead pressed to hers. She’d felt maddened-distraught that her sweet boy had been dealt the card of a runaway girl who chose to pick fights.

              Where she once held absolute belief in Eurydice now lay only distinct anger.

              “Seph,”

              “What?” She whips around on her heel, stares Hermes down with darkened eyes and crossed arms. “You said yourself that you saw her leave with a bag. I came here and you were watching him try not to cry. Hermes, you have to agree with me here.”

              “I’m not doing anything, Persephone.”

              “Yeah, no kidding.”

              “You think I like to watch him be so upset? You think I wasn’t worried when he was late today? My eye’s on our boy every day-I can notice a change in his mood faster than I can with myself. But he’s an adult now; he has to learn how to handle these things on his own. If we keep doing things for him, he’ll never learn.”

              “What, like pay his rent?” It’s the first time Persephone’s eased up on her facial expression, smirking at Hermes in a teasing sort of way.

              “He pays heat and electric. I’m teaching him while letting him live comfortably. What about his full ride to college?”

              “I was teaching there long before he decided that’s where he wanted to go. I might have nudged him a little bit but am I ashamed? No. And his wallet isn’t either.”

              “Which is why he’s the best choice of parent for this child.” Hades speaks up from his place at the counter, where he’s been exceptionally silent-brooding. Persephone hadn’t seen a look like his since college, when he’d unintentionally been the ‘mysterious, intimidating’ figure on campus. Papers are spread out along the bar top, books and bound stacks of research.

              “I thought you weren’t doing any work tonight. We’re talking about our boy, Hades.”

              “And I’m trying to help him. Who says she’s not just going to up and run fully? Who says she’s not going to try and take that baby with her? I’m building a solid case for him, and if this continues I’m bringing in a friend from the district. He’s not about to lose this baby.”

              “Both of you sit down.” Hermes raises his voice just slightly, enough to get Hades tow swivel in his stool, for Persephone to hop up on the bar, nursing a glass of ice water. “We can’t go assuming things just yet. She’s just a girl. She’s young. And whatever she said to Orpheus…you’ve seen how closed-off she is. Persephone, you know her better than both of us. We don’t even know what she did to Orpheus. Is going after her with every weapon we have really the solution we want to teach him?”

              “If it gets him his baby, then yes.” Hades speaks up, gathering his paperwork from the bar and stacking it neatly back into his bag. He rises, shaking his head. “You be the one to tell that boy we have to fight for him to keep the only thing he’s ever wanted.”

              “I’m going to talk to him.” Persephone makes a beeline for the stairs, but makes it only a few steps before Hades and Hermes stop her in her tracks.

              “Just let him have his time-talk to him in the morning. He’s got your baby sleeping, and I’m sure at this point he’s sleeping too. Let him process things.”

--

              The next day brings Persephone back into her classroom, shuffling papers around and writing the beginnings of discussion points on the board. She doesn’t hear the young girl make her way in, find her seat quietly. She doesn’t even notice Eurydice until she turns around.

              Her face is ghostly, distinct dark circles and the slight twinge of nausea twisting her lips. She has her head in her hand, her eyes only rising once to offer a hesitant, silent greeting.

              “I’m working.” Persephone bites, and Eurydice lowers her head again.

              Class passes painfully slow, Eurydice attempting to focus and answer questions with a hand in the air that never gets called on. It’s unusual-typically there’s a long string of banter between them, discussion based on facts and intellect that the other members of the class witness as an open space of time to relax and take note. After half an hour of attempting to participate, Eurydice lowers her head again. The nausea seems to be worse in her second trimester if possible, and the panic within her isn’t helping the situation. She stays seated dutifully against her own body’s will to get up and wander, to attempt to quell the sickness. She’s sure Persephone knows what happened-has already cut her off with a painless ease. Time moves forward. Eurydice’s notes are scattered, gaps within them indicating the places she’d shut down, unable to focus on anything more than breathing-fighting her lurching stomach-attempting to convince herself that everything will be alright.

              “And my office won’t be open other than my designated office hours. That’s all, you can go.” Her words are short and precisely aimed. Eurydice feels their sting as she gathers her bag, ignores the crowd of faces that have clearly picked up on the change in energy.

              The extra early morning shift she’d picked up at the diner had brought her just enough of a tip for a sandwich at the coffee shop.

              She keeps the crumpled bills in her pocket and sits alone in the common instead, attempting to read through notes for her next class. A folded up square of paper falls into her lap as she flips through her notebook, and she knows what it is before she chooses to unfold it, bracing herself.

              Orpheus had written her a song in the coffee shop one morning early on; before the news of a baby, when they’d been more naïve to how quickly they’d become so unintentionally serious. He’d been so shy, scribbling in the music manuscript journal. One hand covered his work-the other brushed occasionally against hers. She’d asked him teasingly to show him her work and he’d refused, blushing, it’s not done yet his most-used phrase until they’d had to go their separate ways.

              She’d found the music in her backpack later on, tucked within the deli paper and twine of a sandwich she hadn’t ordered-her favorite that the shop carried. He’d drawn a little heart on the white wrapping, and she’d smiled at the carefully thought out gesture. She’d learned back then that these things were common with Orpheus, yet they never ceased to take her by surprise.

              Reading the song again after months of seeing him-after the news of a baby and a ring on her finger-Eurydice swallows back the lump of emotion in her throat. With two more classes left in her day, she packs up her things and walks away from campus.

              Eurydice can barely keep herself together as she hops from stop to stop on the subway, suddenly hyperaware of her stature and her youthful face combining with the obvious symptoms of her pregnancy and the fact that she’s very much alone. When she’d executed this trek as an older teen tasting freedom for the first time it had felt exhilarating. Today, there is sadness-humiliation.

              She lowers herself down to her bed with shaky arms, the distance from standing to floor level nearly too much for her to handle. Eurydice covers herself with her scratchy sheets and closes her eyes against the world.

---

              Orpheus paces. The world around him is quiet, lonely. His thoughts are trained on Eurydice-if she’s eaten, what she’s doing on her own. He hasn’t felt this sense of isolation since Hermes had moved out, taken his things uptown and instructed Orpheus in paying heating and electric, working the little fuse box in the backroom of the bar. This is different; he cooks her favorite meal, forgets to make far less than he had been. He doesn’t need to pack the leftovers, although he’s tempted to leave them with Persephone for her anyway. He talks himself out of it, keeping a Tupperware of extra food in the fridge. A piece of him holds onto the hope that she might come back tonight. The newer bit of himself works to talk himself into reality; she needs time. She needs space.

              He wonders if she’s still wearing her ring.

              Persephone stops by, Junie in tow, with a box of warm cookies.

              “Hades made these,” She nurtures. “He thought you might like them.”

              Orpheus is unable to bring himself to sit, even after Persephone asks Junie to find her bin of dolls he keeps in the spare room. Instead he paces, doing the dishes leftover from dinner. Persephone is uncharacteristically quiet. She leans against the counter, feigning a casual mannerism as she watches him. He’s heavier on his feet, more methodical in his labors. Gone is his typical chatter, replaced with the sound of utensils against the metal of the sink.

              “Do you want to talk?” Her deep alto is low and sweet, and he turns to her with misty eyes.

              “She didn’t come home last night. She’s not coming home tonight.” The thought sinks in as he puts his head in his hands, sinks his tall body down to the couch in finality. “What if she never comes home?”

              “Then we fight as hard as we can for your baby.”

              “It’s…what? She would never do that to me. Why would you even say that?” He’s so sure of himself-so sure of her-that Persephone feels herself cringe at the sentence. She’d watched him struggle through his shift at the bar just the day before. He doesn’t seem to take that into account. “What I’m worried about…what if she decides she doesn’t want to be with me anymore?”

              “If she decides she doesn’t want to be with you anymore than that’s her own loss-it’s her own problem. And I’m telling you that of course we’re going to fight. If it came down to it-and it could come down to it…Orpheus, what happened yesterday?”

              He recounts the situation to her as if it were a dream-in a way, he still feels as though none of this is real. He’d been so focused on her feelings in the moment that what she’d been saying hadn’t completely registered until he’d taken the time to replay it. Living the situation over again, he recounts the way Eurydice’s expression had dropped when he’d mentioned Persephone’s offer to take them shopping, the way she’d completely folded in on herself before turning cold, unresponsive. He mentioned the way she looked at all the frilly little dresses with adoration first, and then a passive sort of sadness.

              “And then she said something about us not being thirty year olds with a perfect life. She told me she’s sorry I’m stuck with her. And then-it’s my fault, it really is,”

“-it’s not your fault.”

“I asked her if she only said yes to marrying me because of the baby.”

Persephone’s eyes widen, thought flooding with each potential answer Eurydice could have given. By the way Orpheus had been so distraught the day before she immediately goes to the worst answers-wonders what sweet, gentle Orpheus would do with the ring once they got it back for him. She anticipates a long conversation with Hades and Hermes, gets herself set for battle. For a moment, she feels bad for the young, frightened mother that had become so close to them-she wouldn’t be able to win, not against Hades and his airtight logic. However, Eurydice had hurt her son; Orpheus came first.

“And she told you the baby is the only reason.”

“She…she didn’t answer. And then I got upset that she couldn’t just say no. Why would she have to think about that? If she married me for more than just the baby shouldn’t she just be able to say that to me?”

“My sweet boy,”

“I’m tired.” For the first time Persephone can recount, Orpheus brushes off her affection. “You can stay as long as Junie wants to play. Can you just lock the door when you go?”

She watches as he dips into the spare room, brushes a gentle hand along Junie’s hair, kisses her forehead. He waves at Persephone before shutting his bedroom door, and the only sounds in the apartment are Junie’s tiny footsteps.

[hadestownmodern]

Persephone is everyone’s mom thats it thats the fic

This fic may be my favorite one I’ve personally written for this au??? It means SO fucking much to me and I think we agree that this is one of our favorite relationships to play with!

“Hey mama, you ready to go home?” Persephone peaks into the room, smiling brightly at Eurydice. The young girl was sitting on the edge of the bed, in her boyfriends oversized sweatshirt and pajama pants. She was free now of the IV and various health tracking devices, and how seemed no different than before save for the most important part- being, of course, the baby she held so near and dear to her. 

“Hmm? Oh, yeah. I think so.” Eurydice looks up at her and smiles. She’s already clearly tired but glowing is an understatement on how she radiates joy in this moment. “Have you seen-”

“Orpheus? He’s been cleaning the house all morning. He called me at four am to ask how to wash baby sheets. I thought he’d be here though…” Persephone entered the room and nearly stuck her arms out in anticipation. She’d refrained in the past two days of visits from asking to hold her, not wanting to take Eurydice’s daughter from her. She recalled her own refusal to let anyone hold Junie for days, so she understood. Eurydice worked hard for her, she deserved to never let go of her. 

“Oh he’s been around, he just left. I said I wanted fries and he went running.” Eurydice giggled, leaning down to brush her nose with Melody’s. “He’s gonna do anything we need, isn’t he baby girl?”

“I could have told you that months ago. He’s whipped for you. Thinks you hung the stars in the sky.” Persephone teases as she comes closer and sits next to Eurydice, her head coming to run over the baby’s dark hair. Persephone remembers it vividly- she’ll never forget it actually- the way she was enamored with her tiny daughter. The weight of her in her arms, the way she spent hours intoxicated with the smell of her hair. Eurydice deserved that kind of irrevocable love, too.

 “Does she have a name yet? Or is she gonna be baby girl for a few more days?” Junie had been easy to name- her name was decided for her before Persephone even knew she existed. 

“Oh! We picked one the other night..do you want to hold her?” It was abrupt, but Eurydice needed Persephone to be holding her when she told her. So she could take a picture of her reaction and save it forever, at least in her heart. 

Euydice didn’t want for a response before shoving the baby, tiny as she was in all her six pound glory, into the arms of her pseduo-mother and real best friend. 

“I- of course.” Persephone grins, laughing as soon as the infant is in her arms. “She’s so small! I forgot how little they are. Then again I haven’t seen a baby since Junie, and I never put her down long enough to register that she was an extra weight. She really was just part of me…” She’s cooing at the baby when Eurydice stands and takes the time to get her things together. Save for Orpheus and a few brief nurses visits this is the first time the little girl is out of her arms. 

“So what’s her name? Curly fry? Waffle fry?” Persephone teases, recalling the endless stops they had made together so Eurydice could satisfy a craving one way or another. 

“Cajun fry, thank you.” Eurydice rolls her eyes, but reaches out to hold the baby’s hand. “no..Her name is Melody. ‘Cause she’s like Orpheus singing to her for months now. He’s the only thing that could calm her down...it seemed fitting, you know? To name her after music...after his music. My Melody. Melody Stephanie.” She raises an eyebrow at Persephone, to see if she caught on what she did yet, but the content smile gave nothing away. 

“Melody. It’s a beautiful name. Very Fitting. Melody Stephanie..it’s nice.” Melody, she understood. And looking at the little girl in her arms she could agree- yes, this baby was Melody. Stephanie didn’t flow- she expected maybe an homage to Eurydice’s mother but not Stephanie. “Nice name...I have to admit i’m surprised you didn’t pick something for your mother. I know you don’t talk about her much but you’ve told me before you wish she were here and-”

“It is a nice name.” Eurydice agrees, squinting her eyes at Persephone as she continues to talk about the content of her daughter’s name. She really didn’t get it. “But I did name her after my mother, Perstephanie.” It’s teasing and light, but she looks up just in time for her brown eyes to meet Persephone’s. “You are Orpheus’ mother… and you’re as close as i’ve ever had.”

It was true. She respected her mother and the few memories she had of Lydia were happy ones. But in the terms of parenthood and being a mother- Persephone filled that role for Orpheus his entire life. She went to parent teacher conferences, she went to recitals. She was his mother. And in the short eleven months since she met Persephone- even before she met Orpheus- the woman had filled that role for her too. Persephone was the first person who saw her- not the broken child shuffled home to home, not the girl with the hard shell to protect herself from the world- as herself. Just a girl putting herself through school to make a better life for herself. Just Eurydice. 

Persephone was the person who found out this brilliant girl- who never missed class, turned assignments in early, came to office hours, who offered commentary every discussion- had noone. That she was a force to be reckoned with but she was alone. Persephone was the one who insisted she not spend a holiday alone, not spend one more day in that shady part of town she lived in. Persephone was by and large the reason they were sitting in a hospital room today, a two day old baby being passed between them. 

“She wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you. You’re the reason I formally met the boy who I watched sing across from me at the coffee shop for weeks. You’re the reason I had a place to go, and you’re the one who gave me the wine that said going home with him was a good idea-” Eurydice is laughing and smiling, a juxtaposition to the solid stream of tears falling down her cheeks. Persephone was the only other person besides her Orpheus that could see her like this. 

“You gave me my family.” Eurydice takes Persephone’s hand, and squeezes it, drawing them to look eye to eye. She’s crying and she realizes so is Persephone, though Persephone’s border sobs far more than her own. Eurydice, at least, is trying to stay composed through the rest of her dedication. 

“You gave me my family. Melody wouldn’t exist if you didn’t insist I come over that night. Orpheus is Orpheus because of you. Not because of Calliope. And in the times I needed someone most..when I needed a mom. You were the one who was there. When I was so sick I couldn’t make it to class and you let me eat crackers in your office. Or when I was so tired I couldn’t stand and you let me sleep in your office. You kept shoes for me knowing I was going to be so damn stubborn i’d be crying by noon if it weren’t for you saving my life with flip flops.” Eurydice laughs, wiping her tears away, before she runs that hand over her daughter’s cheek, eyes looking at only Melody now.

“I don’t want her to carry the ghosts and demons of a dead woman in her name. I loved my mother when I was little. But she isn’t my mom like you are, Seph. And if she ends up anything at all like you then she’ll be a damn good woman one day.”  

Persephone is speechless, tears falling over her face and landing on the baby she held. Her heart felt tight in her chest, as pieces from a conversation with her mother eight short months ago fell into place. 

“I’m just scared he’ll get his heart broken,” Persephone is sitting at the island in her kitchen, across from her mother, picking at broken bits of Christmas Cookies. “And if he does it’ll be my fault. I introduced them. And if he gets his heart broken-”

“I know you love the boy, Persephone. We all do. You raised him. Yet you also know they love each other. And that is deep and inseverable love. Do not worry. This is meant to happen in this way. They are two souls created for each other. The universe works the way it was supposed to. They were made to be together, this is just a fact of life. They are meant to have this baby just as I was meant to have you, Honey Bee.” Demeter is stitching something intently, across from Persephone, but watched her daughter intently. “The love they have for each other was put there by the universe..but so was the love you have for her.”

Persephone raises an eyebrow at her, reaching out to grab her wine glass, swirling the deep wine within it rather than bringing it to her lips. “She’s a great girl and I love her, yeah-”

“No. She was meant to be in our lives as much as she was his. She was born to another woman but her soul is tied to yours. You could not have been her mother by birth, no. That privilege was reserved for Juniper and the things she will bring you. But, Eurydice needs you in the same way you need her. Whatever that may be is up to you.” Demeter muses, glancing at her granddaughter who was sitting on the floor, playing with a baby doll. “Yes, Eurydice is part of your heart for a reason. Don’t underestimate the power of the love you will share.”

“Look, i’m “Rydice!” Junie interjects, waving the baby around enthusiastically, before holding her arms up to Demeter to be held. 

Persephone snorts before drinking the remnants of the wine, shaking her head at her toddler. “June Bug, you can’t say that yet.”

“Why not? She’s right. This one, she’s got the gift for sure.” Demeter kisses her angelic curls, wrapping both arms around her grand daughter. 

“Mmhmm. Gift.”

“Eurydice I-” She doesn’t know what to say, she doesn’t know how to elaborate on the deep feelings of love and protection she feels for the young girl infront of her. 

“Is that okay with you?” Eurydice asks, so soft Persephone isn’t sure she’s actually speaking or if she’s imagining it. “We can change it-”

“What? No, No. I’m honored, Eurydice. Truly- i’m so honored.” Persephone breaks their linked hands so that she can run her finger under her eyes to catch her tears. “I-thank you, Eurydice.”

“Thank you, for everything you’ve given us.” Eurydice wraps her arms around Persephone’s shoulders, careful not to crush her daughter between them. “Thank you for seeing more than the broken girl with the sad story.”

Persephone wraps her free arm around Eurydice’s back, hiding her crying face in the dark, cropped hair of the new mother in her arm. 

They stay like this for minutes, at least, until Orpheus returns to the room and finds them crying in each other’s arms. He wants to ask, but knows what has transpired is personal and intimate to the two of them and that if he’s meant to know he will. That’s just the way the universe would have it.