#the return to time was not my choice
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(hell bent; steven moffat, eurydice; sarah ruhl)
#doctor who#clara oswald#twelfth doctor#twelveclara#vic weaves webs#the return to time was not my choice#intertwingularity#rescue me chin boy and show me the stars#does the pink opaque ever feel more real than real life
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Objective: Wake the Dreamer.
#ffxiv#sketch#concept#zenos yae galvus#meteor survivor#adventurer zenos- technically LOL#my goofy ass theory crafting continues:#both the state of zenos at the edge#and WoL making some questionable life choices now that they have a funny maguffin#meteor but whenever he hears āthose we lost and those we can yet saveā any time during dawntrail onwards he just gets hit#by zero's zenos quotes LOL#aka how to inflict psychic damage on him in one simple step#meanwhile i write/theorize zenos is moreso stuck in his own immobile body#basically that he's dead but still conscious#in turn because of the dynamis in the egg the area around him starts to morph in accordance to his ādreamsā#meteor gets to be both very confused and very distraught that he returns to find him in a bed of nymian lilies instead of an empty plane#which appeared for both zenos' loneliness and maybe wanting to at least be mourned by someone#on top of the hope that meteor is out there somewhere continuing his travels#meteor- but uriangers implications that it mightve been zenos that saved him rotates him out of nowhere ocassionally#and then especially when he sees him again#I miss my murder husband#I wish we had a minion of him so if he ever comes back we can show it to him like we did to raha#I wish to impose a little guy upon him v-v
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I took a screenshot and it's doing things to me I can't describe
#there is something about it#I just can't look away#once again got proved that the best outcomes come with unexpected choices#and losses....#(Ciel's left hand that got cropped out is my main loss in this post)#sorry for shitposting it's just that when I saw it separately it suddenly was like a whole new (and honestly better looking :') ) picture#ahhh just one more reason not to post right away and give it some time before returning with refreshed view and all that i guess#won't put usual tags on it for now as to not clog them up with basically the same thing#though might change my mind later who knows
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i'm sure it's been said somewhere before but thinking very hard about "no man, however great, can know his destiny. like everyone he must live and learn, and so it must be for the young warlock.." like. the very first line of the entire series. explicitly said by kilgarrah to apply to merlin as well. and yet kilgarrah tried otherwise. he told merlin up front what his destiny was and tried to push him away from living through the bad things whenever possible.
and it feels like kilgarrah reflecting on everything after the fact because he thought he could change it!! he thought maybe by telling him the good stuff it could be happy this time. maybe merlin could become the greatest warlock and help arthur become a great leader and fulfil all of those prophecies and make all those great things happen but also he could kill mordred and destroy morgana and erase all his enemies and still be that great person.
except he couldn't, of course. and by telling him and trying to control the narrative kilgarrah sealed his fate; destiny doesn't allow for choices. it just doesn't work like that, and they all learned, and kilgarrah lived and learned and is left simply with that lesson: that no one can know their destiny.
#bbc merlin#kilgharrah#merlin#merlin meta#res rambles#my contribution to the influx of merlinposting i am having so many thoughts about how he was doomed from the start#because he wasn't supposed to know!! destiny cannot be fulfilled knowingly because it becomes choice#by trying you'll make it happen in the worst ways#and now i'm thinking about merlin left knowing that and wondering how much to believe in destiny anymore#because despite the lesson the promise of destiny was all kilgarrah had left to give him: arthur will return because it is destiny#except you're not supposed to know your destiny. what happens then?#last time knowing led to the loss of everything. is knowing this time the punishment?#being left with the hope that he'll be back and it feels like a taunt#like 'you wanted to know so bad? live for nothing but the knowing now#forever and ever and ever'#and he wakes up everyday and the promise mocks him. and it comforts him. and it tears him apart day after day after day for eternity#how much do you think merlin regrets knowing any part of his destiny. does he regret it at all?#he should. but it brought him arthur at least once so how could he regret that#he doesn't believe in destiny really. he believed in arthur and that was part of the undoing and now destiny is all he has#and destiny keeps mocking him from the corner
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The Midoriya Twins from Singularity by WinterMoonlight
I've been wanted to draw fanart for this fic for a while now, especially as an excuse to draw Satoru with his eye scars, and I figured it's one year anniversary (and Satoru's canon birthday lol) was a good occasion for a little sketch. Both Izuku and Satoru benefit from having a brother so much and I weep at how wholesome they are.
(By the way Singularity is a great JJK x MHA fic where several JJK characters get reincarnated in MHA and it's so good and I cannot recommend it enough. We get fun new character dynamics AND it does canon character dynamics so well. Consider this the tip of the iceberg of my propaganda.)
#jjk x mha#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#my hero academia#mha#gojo satoru#midoriya satoru#technically lol#midoriya izuku#singularity by wintermoonlight#fic rec#fic fanart#pencil's art tag#ill admit I was mostly drawing satoru as satoru as a teenager but#i do think it's so cool how he also takes after his new uncle iykyk#while izuku of course is the spitting image of inko#that said I couldn't resist giving satoru a bit of freckles too#he deserves them#as a treat (to me)#also I wasn't sure which direction his eyes got sliced but I always imagined it horizontal so here we are#also to keep rambling about my one-night-drawing art choices the shirt thing was too good to pass up#my favorite izuku tshirt kinda matches satoru's hair so I returned the favor#it was weird to put satoru in green but he's a midoriya now he's gotta live up to the name#anyways cant believe Ive been following this fic for a year now#how time flies
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iām sooooooo normal about the god of war series. so incredibly normal i liked it a normal amount and would be so chill talking about it. donāt worry about the sign

#god of war#iām so so so so so normal about it itās so whatever itās so haha you know#something something when it comes to yourself youāll let yourself drown before you change. youāll die before you change who youāve become#to survive this long#up to and until it affects the ones youāve come to love in this life youāve made for yourself and you suddenly have no choice but to change#itās fine itās ok itās chill. everyone does this.#itās becoming a parent and loving your child so much you HAVE to change. you HAVE to be better#we MUST be better. than they were.#whoās they. our parents. the gods that come before us. yes.#iām screaming iām crying iām wasting away im disintegrating. thereās no coming back there no return#you are on your knees. you are gripping your sonās shoulders like theyāre the only thing keeping you tethered to the earth.#you are struggling with who you are and who you want to become. you are promising to be better.#iām so normal about parent(al figures) taking responsibility for their actions and choosing to do better#iām not high enough to really express whatās going on here. can you feel it? can you fucking feel it?#this series has destroyed me.#dad of boy. dad(s) of boy. i will never be the same (affectionate)#canāt remember the last time i finished a series and went āoh well iāve GOT to play it again Now That I Knowā#AND I HAVENT EVEN TALKED ABOUT THE BROTHER HULDRA!!!!!!!!!#sindriās face. has not left my memory#iām dying scoob#gow#gowr
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what art program(s?) do you use??
Autodesk Sketchbook! That one old app almost no one uses now because there are way better alternatives, but itās just a peak program to me. <D I only use one basic brush there (with standard and grainy texture) and a smudge for better shading!



#montesmithart_txt#a little story:#I bought Procreate months ago just so I could replace Autodesk with it#but it turned out to have SO many different options and brushes and everything that it literally scared me#and even after some time I couldn't get used to it š#so I had no choice but to return to my good old app#and i can't even tell you how happy I was to be back to my one and only favorite brush..#it turned out that this was literally all I needed
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I drew another Chara- living with the Dreemurrs edition

"The King and Queen treated the human child as their own. The underground was filled with hope."
I don't like this as much as the last one but oh well... I ended up rambling a huge amount in the tag, so if you want details and headcanons about the actual drawing again, you'll have to look pretty far down this time, sorry (Also, I ran out of tags after a while. Tumblr is tired of me, lol. I might reblog this more tags later if I remember what I was going to say.)
#chara dreemurr#undertale#next up: the narrator#(I know that's not a title they receive in game like the other two but... just let me have this)#The future monarch of monsterkind. The prophecized saviour. One of the most important people in the underground. An angel apparently.#Chara puts all of their effort into appearing perfect in both appearance and manners. They're representing all the underground now and they#don't want to let down the king and queen! (Plus Chara's scared of getting kicked out or worse should they ever disappoint their family)#But... they're gonna save everyone! They're gonna make sure the monsters win this war! It's their destiny! The prophecy says so!#(... That's why all this happened to them. Chara sees themself as smarter more careful and maturer than their peers... because of the way#what a strange child...#hey look! I did a thing#my art#they were raised on the surface. They believe they have the skills to lead monsterkind to victory because of what they suffered.#Almost like they were trained or led to this moment. Like they don't have a choice. But this makes all their pain worth it right?#It was always for this fated grand purpose right? That's why they hate feeling robbed of their ''purpose''! Might be part of why they hate#determination! What do you mean you can defy fate? What do you mean things could've been different? That I didnt have to go through this?#that it wasn't written in the stars?... Oh shit I forgot to talk about the drawing!#The little bunches are supposed to look like monster ears. Especially with the monster soul locket. They're doing a curtsy which they alway#upon meeting someone new and introducing themself as the future monarch of monsterkind. Calling whoever they're talking to sir or ma'am.#Wanted to make it a curtsy/bow combination but I couldn't draw that. They have a little golden flower clip to pull their hair back and#they gave themself the belt and flouncy petticoat. They iron and polish everything they wear literally everytime they go outside.#Chara wears heeled boots whenever possible because they really hate being so short...they somehow think it makes them look weak.#The blushes and lashes are make-up! Chara wants to look perfect after all! They also really really hate their red spots/birthmarks and will#cover them up whenever possible...and they're wearing their crucifix again. Of course they are! Through it all they'll always keep#their faith. ....Until Chara finds themself a figurehead of an entirely new religion. I think they're...newly 11 here. (Second year in the#underground. 10 when they fell. 13 when they did.) Comfortable (comfortable as they can be) with their new family but not yet desperate#to get them out as soon as possible. Might not even be working with Gaster yet. But Asriel already gave Chara their locket.#I definitely think it was...a while before Chara really thought of returning the favour. Not that they don't utterly shower#Asriel and their parents in other gifts or affection! But they're just not one to make... promises of forever lightly. Especially because#Chara isn't really planning on staying around for a long time at all! They will break the barrier like prophecized then climb the mountain
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(f sharp; yellowjackets, the dollhouse; yellowjackets, i rarely dream of orpheus; laura gilpin, the dollhouse; yellowjackets, a word to orphists; kazimierz wierzyÅski, the dollhouse; yellowjackets, the edible complex; yellowjackets, orpheus (1); margaret atwood, the dollhouse; yellowjackets)
NAT + ORPHEUS / TRAVIS + EURYDICE
#quick one cause im eepy#yellowjackets#travis martinez#nat scatorccio#natalie scatorccio#travnat#yellowjackets web weave#web weave#natalie scattorcio#rare adult timeline post... woah#vic weaves webs#for example: you are both cain and abel#the return to time was not my choice#tell nat she was right
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just read the new mutants issue where Charles chose to stay behind in space and my god the juxtaposition between Charles trusting Erik and Erik joining the hellfire club and wondering at his own trust worthiness. I wonder how much of Charles decision was him ultimately trying to avoid the fact that his first class had seemingly betrayed mutant kind and not be willing to face them and how much of it was Dani and Illyana's reaction to him having Karma mind control Illyana. the fact that Illyana was depending on him to ease her mind through limbo and in choosing to stay he forced karma to do it instead, probably fucking up their relationship in the process.
I love him, this is crazy, how much of this is him trying to runaway and how much is this him not trusting himself to fix things and how much is it just him trusting Erik?
i keep trying to put into words my exact thoughts about the sitch but there really is a lot for one issue aintit... oh charles you and your brain...
#snap chats#thats why we have tag rambles AHAHA#ok so to tackle things one at a time charles ultimately deciding to stay in space despite his expressed want to return to earth#obviously it was when lilandra pointed out if her sister took charge of the shi'ar then the universe- earth included- would be in peril#charles notes his position as a losing one: whichever choice he makes he loses#he goes to earth then the universe could be at stake/he stays in space he loses his kids#of course charles COULD just put his faith in the starjammers but is that a risk he wants to take ? evidently not#charles' reoccurring flaw is he's willing to sacrifice personal relationships for the greater perceived good#even lilandra acknowledges this- that charles' homesickness for earth was an inevitability just as she is indebted to protecting the stars#so now his ruptured relationship with illyana and co- esp right after comforting a split illyana last issue#we've seen charles act more coldly/rashly when he's about to lose people (i think of his first death with the og5 mostly)#i mean it's a key part to charles' chara that he doesn't favor mind controlling others and im sure he has the same regard for his students#he's aware of the damage it can do and in this instance- for one reason or another- he orders it to be done regardless#im sure he does this as a form of defense: if his kids are upset with him they won't feel too bad about losing him and it'll be less painfu#obviously we still see sam wish charles farewell and wish for him to come back soon but yk.. worthy attempt..#and it's not as if charles wants them to hate him ENTIRELY.. he's still touched by sam's goodbye no.... fickle man he is..#i dont think charles is totally afraid to confront the og5- its what made him want to return to earth with the nms initially#tho again.. could his decision to stay in the stars be influenced by that? that maybe he ISNT prepared to confront them like he thought?#who's to say... not me i dont got that psych degree yet..#erik being charles' trusted confidant definitely made his decision easier on top of that: i mean is he needed if he has a substitute#i think charles DOES wholly trust erik: charles really doesnt approach his x-men half heartedly. from his pov ofc#if he didn't genuinely believe in erik's potential he wouldn't have picked him; hes a comforting thought when charles decides to depart#'although i'm gone erik understands me and my goals enough to continue my work as good as i would have so i have nothing to worry about'#which. yk. makes the whole White King thing kinda awkward VJAELVJEAKL charles you fool#i have no idea how this saga ends though... tbh im only on ish 45 of NM i just read 50 and 51 to get context for this ask#so i can only wait and see how this saga turns out... once i finish reading house of m/secret invasion stuff jvLKEJKA#idk im tired and rambling dont pay attention to me.. ramblin bout charles' brain is a good day for me regardless if i make sense jVLAJ
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Breaking Bad, S5 E4 - Fifty One
"I left the receipt in the box in case you want to exchange it. Anyway. Hey, happy birthday."
#girl help this show is tearing my soul apart#breaking bad#jesse pinkman#walter white#breaking bad screencaps#Jesse's assumption that Walter would return it...because he makes him feel like he makes bad/dumb/wrong choices.......#but he gets him the watch.........#and it's the nicest gift Walter could get#BYE#Jesse it's time to pack up and leave#q#oh and also the gift with the receipt being a way of giving his money to Mr. White........#after Mr White was so peeved about Mike's ābusiness decisionsā ....#and Jesse had then offered his own money in Mr. White's place but Mr White said No#yeah#but ofc Mr. White isn't returning that. come on#*smashes my head against the wall*
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guess whose cystic acne has returned š
#technically it returned in march of last year#but i only just got it looked at by a dermatologist today#it did take eight years to return so i guess i got extremely lucky if i look at it that way#but anyway#i have to go on antibiotics again for 3 months#but if itās anywhere near as stubborn as it was last time#i will have to go back on roaccutane#which is literally my nightmare scenario given all the medications i take to manage my chronic pain#letās hope it doesnāt even come to that#on the plus side the antibiotics will probably clear up my rosacea#so thatās much-appreciated lmao#itās funny but also incredibly sweet how every specialist i have gone to in recent years will read through my medical history#and apologise for adding yet another diagnoses to my extensive list of chronic conditions#as if they played a part in bestowing any of them upon me#i never know what to say other than āit is what it isā because i really have no choice but to put up with this body#if you made it to this point#i just wanted to say ily and i hope youāre having a great day š©·#personal
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A succubus and a demon! (The succubi don't have names but the demon is Kronos and the succubus is one of his bosses in Hell and he's not /fond/ of the succubi for many reasons but they all adore picking on him)
Also because I love them and like to point it out, the succubi act more as pleasure dealers in the sense of they offer up whatever a human wants most in exchange for their soul. It's rarely of a sexual nature since it's what they want MOST in life. And most people's ambitions are outside of a bedroom. (happy pride, asexuals are able to get affected by a succubus now without discrimination)
#my characters#did i make succubi in a plot that i could fall victim to as an asexual personally? yeah#kronos is just a petty lil baby with a younger brother who is very nice for a demon#kronos is responsible for being a dick to everyone in the plot and yet has the weirdest morals and its not fine#but hes gonna make that everyone elses problem not his#for instance he originally goes to earth bc a human has somehow just stolen all of the Devils attention and its annoying#why fixate on one human doomed to Hell just let the guy live and die then fixate#so he goes to kill the human but ends up saving the guy and then agonizes because even as a demon#its REALLY tacky to save someone and then kill them#so he doesnt kill him and instead demands to be a roommate until he returns to hell#and then they team up to kill demons and other creatures that seem obsessed with the human#and so they just kinda kill and banish demons back to hell and its fiiiine kronos is just causing problems for Hell#thats not even a new issue hes always doing that !#and then they meet a siren who refuses to talk and kronos is like oh time to be the biggest dick ever#and is like well if she wont talk and she needs a name i vote halibut#as a mean joke bc why would she want to be named after a fish#and she lights up and is SUPER happy and nods and beams and is so happy with her new name#and then the human is like well she needs more clothes than one outfit right#also shes barefoot and its cold i need to buy her shoes idk what tho#and kronos is like here buy her these rainboots and so the guy buys them and is like just wear these#until you can show me what you want bought ok and halibut is in love with her cute lil yellow rainboots#so basically everything kronos does out of spite to the weird mute siren (by choice) backfires#and she adores him and doesnt know hes trying to be mean to her#anyway the succubi collectively like to pick on the really silly and childish demons they outrank#like kronos! so he is constantly a target for them to mock which is why he isnt fond of them which fuels them more#the succubi are just really chill most of the time though ?#and its just. i love my succubi ok theyre wonderful#and that has been another story time in the tags bye
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Ironic how the least high fashion and out of place fit of the lux couture line is the one the fandom likes the most
#āOMG THESE OUTFITS ARE SO UGLY AND THE COLORSāā#SHUT UP ITS NOT MY FAULT U HAVE NO TASTE š
#but legitness as someone whos been following high and runway fashion trends for a while...#ace's outfit is so tacky....#get with the times acey boy bedazled boleros are so early 2000s#high fashion trends rn are returning to the loose boxy shape#which we see in azul and jamil#vils fit is actually much simpler than what i expected though#but does hold some of the newer trends rn like playing with pleats/folds and layering different fabrics#aces silhouette sticks out like a sore thumb#so i had yuu also get a cropped coat to balance it out#once is a mistake twice is a choice š¤āļø#twisted wonderland#twst#ALSO I find it funny that people say the color combination is ugly bc 1. they used the huntsman's palette is an obvious reference#2. THATS LITERALLY GUCCI'S PALETTE JDBCSJXKXKA
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Needing a Sua perspective from the ALNST auditions to Round 1. I never put much thought into what happens to the cast post-Anakt Garden graduation (do they immediately go to the auditions? Is there a period of time where they dont see each other until they recognize each other at the audition? Theres a considerable amount of time between the auditions and their Alien Stage season, did they see each other often between then or...? etc.), but regardless, imagine being her and having to choose between sabotaging your own audition so you dont have to go the the Sing, Win, or Die Show or putting your in your all in hopes of winning and spending just a bit more time with this girl you love because you know itll likely be the last time you see her. Imagine...
#dee p thoughts#alien stage#alnst#vivinos#like. not as if life wouldve been sunshine and rainbows if sua failed the audition and never went on alien stage hashtag Im a Pet to Aliens#but like. sua was definitely more in the know. Im not the type to believe mizi was completely naive but I think mizi may have bought into#the idea that dying Wasnt That Bad due to what she was taught and her trust in her owners...until round 1- maybe mizi was confident she'd#truly win and/or her owners praised and made her feel so. sua: ''My dream is Mizi's dream. (paraphrased)'' etc etc#maybe it was the dream of mizi's owners that mizi wanted to fulfill or mizi just wanted to impress her owners in return for their care...#but sua knew. she knew it would either be she never sees mizi again whether she dies or achieve such fame that sua could never reach her...#or sua can spend a little time with her. whatever they have left. whether it was her or mizi the likelihood of them ever seeing each other#again... because mizi is intent on this. she is going to join alien stage. she is going to pass the auditions because she is so dazzling.#...I need to be with her.#I think considering the ivan and sua comic anakt garden may be a pipeline to alien stage? its functionally a music school iirc so I think i#at least gives them a leg up and humans are put into anakt garden with at least some intention of having them try out for alien stage-#but nonetheless I imagine there was a liminal space where none of the cast really knew where their lives were going post-anakt garden.#not that they have much choice in the matter but still dalkjdalkbn- that liminal space mustve been a dark time for majority of them#because well. their owners. and they couldnt meet each other and may never meet again...#regarding the time between the auditions and their alien stage season I imagine its funnily a lot of. training. pr vocals visuals...#they have autographs despite them all potentially dying quickly they had them draft and practice and perfect autographs guys adjlkbnadlfkjf#the look mizi and sua shared in sweet dream when they both passed the auditions together...AUGH.....
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Well, on the upside, Veilguardās absolutely horrid writing and utter lack of meaningful roleplay mechanics made me appreciate Inquisitionās already watered-down writing and roleplay mechanics.
#Emmrichās pretty much the only decent companion but my god.#This game feels like a daycare simulator.#No option but to be nice to and validate everyone even when theyāre being objectively awful themselves (looking at Taash in particular)#The stakes should feel high but instead I just feel like Iām babysitting toddlers#And normally Iām a completionist who loves doing all the quests but the game actively forces you into it#You HAVE to recruit all the companions; you HAVE to baby and validate them all; you HAVE to complete all their quests#No option to even mention the supposed Dire Stakes of the universe.#The game treats you like youāre seven and over-explains everything to you. The maps are terrible even if they look good.#The voice acting for a few companions is⦠questionable.#For a game we waited ten years for it feels like someoneās rough/unfinished first draft.#And again no truly meaningful roleplay choices or actions.#The game just forces you to be nice to everyone. Rook feels like an inveterate spectator and an invertebrate to boot. Utterly spineless.#Every time we see a returning companion I feel like Hadvar: āWho⦠are you?ā#Because they act nothing like their previously established personalities & itās like Veilguard goes out of its way to ignore previous games#The head writerās self-insert is painfully obvious and atrociously-written in particular#You can only be a Good Nice Guy#Maybe sometimes a Stern Nice Guy and very occasionally a Nice Guy Who Thinks Heās Funny But Isnāt#Just! My god.#I want to return the game. For the first time ever in my life.#So disappointed.#text#chey.txt
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