#the response was the most in-character I could think

[meticulac]

Naive Rules to Argumentative Fantastical Play

Roles: director, encounter-controller, adventurer-patrons

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Preparation: Together, write a realm sheet. Record: Realm-name Creation-date player-bylines starting social-groups, one per-player, with: group name general aesthetic three common member traits several common names frequent hazard

Encounter-controller: Define enemy characters in relation to common realm traits and frequent hazards. Director: Mock up introduction, outline, formatted for convenient encounter production.

Adventurer-patrons each have: reserve-deck of character-cards spirit deck for dead and retired characters Character-cards are 3x5 note cards made starting with: character-name player-alias creation date three traits, but each from a different social-group

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Adventuring: Director: Present introduction, passing control to encounter-controller.

Encounter-start: adventurer-patrons without a living party member draw from reserve-deck.

Encounter-controller: Present situations, asking each adventurer-patron in turn for character responses. Players argue over applicability of character traits using Septem-Circumstantiae questions. After all responses, roll any dice to determine party luck, then describe outcomes, including any character deaths. Decide if encounter ends. Once per-encounter per-player: Optionally draw from spirit deck for a trophy-assist style summon.

Director: Observe, produce further encounters for encounter-controller as needed, steer adventure to resolve in one or two sessions.

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Session-end: Record each party member's most memorable success and failure (or death) as timestamped traits. Retire character-cards when almost full.

Feel free to archive this game off-site! I also posted this to Pollowfort, and if reasonably practical, I would like for the Pillowfort post to also be linked directly from the archive, but if that seems like it could be a hassle don't worry about it.

The game was completed fairly early on and is being submitted last-minute mainly because I was holding out for anyone to show interest in doing even one playtest of it, I'll maybe consider just skipping that part next year. I did get some feedback from someone proofreading it though, so that was nice.

Anyway, a quick rundown of the ideas here is that having adventuring players help in filing out information about the realm, and having a specifically designated player serve the role of building out encounters while the other game master actually runs them are both meant to reduce pressure to constantly come up with and keep track of everything in the game.

The argument system sort of goes against that a bit, but ideally it should also just take the desire to rules-lawyer and direct that itself toward storytelling by asking adventurers to philosophically justify why what they're doing should work. It's also a nice excuse to name-drop the ancient Greek version of the Five Ws.

It should also be helped by having every character card act as a log of the most notable story events they were involved in. The card system, where characters are initially made via simple templates and dead characters kept in a spirit deck, are both there to make it so running a game where death comes fast and easy is can run as smoothly and painlessly as possible.

If I could easily fit more stuff in this, I would want to expressly make it so new characters can also take inspiration from one random dead character as one of their traits. I also kind of like the idea of having players each design a deity character who they use to add divine intervention moves to the spirit deck, mainly because having that be a player's main character could further help players feel comfortable playing fast and loose with their mortal underlings.

Incidentally, the process of building the realm together out of whatever aesthetics the players think of first kind of resembles how in the Disney Animated version of Peter Pan (1953), the island of Neverland mainly consists of features that the principal characters used as happy thoughts to fly there. I didn't realize I was working that in at first, but it's incidentally something I've been thinking would be cool to design into a game.

Edit for some extra design notes I thought of:

The part where you give each character a new ability each session was something I thought of thanks to an untitled game where you play as possibly-ghosts of mysterious origin that I played on Discord once with some people. In that game you got a new ability basically every other phase of play and that really got out of hand quickly, hence why I reduced it to once per session.

Also designed for speeding things up is the part where you only roll once for the entire party, since performing and interpreting rolls does take up some time, and I figure condensing the overall luck of the party as if they were acting as a single unit wouldn't be too bad for a game where parties are supposed to act as cohesive teams anyway.

200 Word RPGs 2024

Each November, some people try to write a novel. Others would prefer to do as little writing as possible. For those who wish to challenge their ability to not write, we offer this alternative: producing a complete, playable roleplaying game in two hundred words or fewer.

This is the submission thread for the 2024 event, running from November 1st, 2024 through November 30th, 2024. Submission guidelines can be found in this blog's pinned post, here.

[mylittleredgirl]

buckle up folks, it's deep dive about chakotay hours!

season 2, "initiations"

@isthereintruthnobeauty1968 asked a question about chakotay in this post about the scene above:

for an infamous leader of an anti-federation rebel group he seems to firmly believe in its authority and ideals And to have (at least externally) adjusted to the blended crew seamlessly. what's the deal?

see, i don't think chakotay ever wanted to be a rebel, or even a leader for that matter.

he wanted to be a starfleet officer.

season 2, "tattoo"

chakotay enrolls in the acadamy as a teenager as young as he legally can ("tattoo"). he tells seven ("one small step") that he joined starfleet because of his love of paleontology, and he only turned away from that out of responsibility to the maquis and now to voyager.

[get a snack for this one y'all]

season 6, "one small step"

it doesn't come up often, but whenever chakotay talks about his pre-voyager starfleet career, it's always about first contact or archaeology. in "emanations," he compares their exploration of an alien burial moon to a mission he went on as an ensign, all while demonstrating his anthropology expertise. add that to him nerding out in "blink of an eye," "one small step," the dinosaur episode, and a bunch of other examples, he's a social scientist both by training and by inclination.

in the original star trek, they had an "A&A officer," a specialist in archaeology, anthropology, and ancient civilizations:

tos season 2, "who mourns for adonais?"

we never hear that term again, but that's the role chakotay often fills on voyager, and he's very happy whenever he gets to do it.

now, realistically, i don't know how much time pre-maquis chakotay would have spent in a blue uniform, because those skills would not make him an obvious choice to lead a maquis cell. ro laren sets up his character (unnamed) in tng as a tactical specialist who resigns to join the maquis:

tng season 7, "preemptive strike"

(which is a very polite and noble way to do it, as compared to eddington's defection in ds9.)

if he was in fact ro’s teacher (i think so, despite a stardate conflict in some later dialogue), it seems very in-character to me that chakotay could have started out pursuing a sciences path before showing an aptitude for piloting, strategy, and/or command. given what we know of him, regardless of his own passions or preferences, if a senior officer noticed his skills and encouraged him to change career tracks, he would do it.

teen angst era aside, he respects authority. he argues against dogmatic ideology when it's inflexible to the needs of the moment, but he likes working within a command hierarchy, and for better or worse, he is easily swayed by charismatic leaders.

season 1, "caretaker"

not only does he yield to janeway's authority on voyager before she even asks him to, and then molds himself into the kind of first officer he thinks will help her most, he does the same thing with annorax in "year of hell." tom is the voice of ethical conscience and reason in that episode, and he organizes the rebellion—against chakotay's orders!

there's so much going on here:

season 4, "year of hell part 2"

despite his father's perceptions of him as a contrarian, chakotay only rebels as a last resort. he would genuinely rather not. he clearly talked about the maquis cause with ro and others before he left—and i bet that's why he resigned to a starfleet admiral in person, to make one last appeal. his preference is to try and change systems from within.

not to west wing about it, but chakotay is only The Guy when he has to be—he wants to be the guy the guy counts on.

(hot take: with how he rationalizes the calculated sacrifices annorax is making in "year of hell," i don't think chakotay would have left starfleet for the maquis if it wasn't personal. but it was personal, so here we are!)

maquis chakotay is a disillusioned idealist, but he's never that disillusioned. he believes in the stated ideals of the federation, sometimes more than janeway does.

season 3, "scorpion part 1"

and it's a fundamental character trait that he looks for the best in people and situations, often to his own detriment (tuvok, seska, annorax, that time janeway and tuvok and tom all lie to him for half a season, the list goes on).

and it's easy to see good in starfleet, especially when most of his career was during the height of federation utopia before "the best of both worlds," at which point starfleet remembered it's also a defensive force and started building the defiant—which was the very first starfleet ship ever designed solely for combat.

the cardassian situation in tng is shown as an aberration in a largely peaceful era. the off-screen "border wars" were fought by officers who expected to go their entire careers never firing a phaser.

tng season 4, "the wounded"

for decades since making peace with the klingons, and with the romulans keeping to themselves, starfleet has been mostly goodhearted nerds who are committed to exploring and making friends. even if chakotay was a tactical officer, that was the starfleet he signed up for and served.

and, in fact, the reason why the federation abandoned the colonists in the dmz in the first place and wouldn’t help bajor during the cardassian occupation is because the federation and starfleet are devoted to the ideals of peace and noninterference to a fault.

tng season 5, "ensign ro"

chakotay doesn't object to starfleet's actions, but its inaction.

which, side note, is why janeway's choice in "caretaker" makes it easy for him to rally behind her. by choosing to protect the ocampa, even though it's a huge sacrifice and puts her in a prime directive gray area, janeway specifically addressed the exact trust gap he has with starfleet.

season 1, "caretaker"

that's what he wanted them to do back home!

chakotay defends his starfleet uniform in the kazon scene that inspired this whole essay, and he believes what he's saying, because he's right: that's not what a starfleet uniform represents, either in theory or in practice. especially in the mid-24th century, regardless of the political issues, the federation and starfleet do not conquer planets or enslave alien cultures by force.

(of course, they wouldn't have helped the kazon free themselves either, but that's not the question on the table.)

to op's main question: it's an interesting (or boring?) doylist choice to make chakotay such a platonic ideal of a Starfleet Officer™️ (which, for the record, has always included going off-leash at the expense of one's career whenever ethics overwhelm regulations).

season 1, "prime factors"

star trek went to a lot of trouble to create the maquis for the voyager premise of two crews... and then quickly brady-bunch'd them into one happy family and let deep space nine wrangle the maquis problem instead. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

chakotay being so willing to put himself and his crew into starfleet uniforms (even though some members of both crews objected to it) cheated us out of some potentially rich drama, but it does hold water with what we see of him as a character on screen, and his relationship with starfleet. it has disappointed him, but he still believes that it's a force for good, and chakotay will always err on the side of seeing the good in something and thinking he can change it for the better from within.

--

tl;dr: chakotay is a starfleet officer by training and at heart, who was temporarily out of uniform because his family and tribe happened to be directly in the middle of starfleet's messiest ethical quagmire.

he made a personal, moral decision to join the maquis, not because he was anti-federation, but because that was the only way to protect federation civilians—which was part of his starfleet oath to begin with. he worked hard when he was younger to earn this uniform and i think, in spite of everything, he feels honestly proud to get to wear it again.

[dreamscapeee222]

HIII HII!! Could you do arcane characters with a reader who has sleep paralysis, I’ve been having it alot lately and I never see it represented online. Hope you’re well and THANK YOUUU IF YOU WRITE IT!! 😼😼

A/n: HEYHEY!! Most of us has experienced this before. Let's see how'd they react to it :3

You often experience sleep paralysis

Vi, Jinx, Caitlyn, Ekko, Jayce, Viktor, Mel

Masterlist

Vi

The first time you told Vi about your sleep paralysis, she leaned against the wall, arms crossed, her brows knitting together in that concerned way that softened her tough exterior.

“Damn,” she muttered. “That sounds rough.”

You expected her to brush it off—Vi wasn’t exactly the sentimental type—but instead, she stepped closer, her presence grounding. “Look,” she said, placing a hand on your shoulder, “whatever creepy nightmare’s got you stuck, I’m punching it for you, got it?”

Her words were simple, but they hit hard. She stayed close on nights she noticed you were more restless, sometimes dragging a chair to sit near your bed, her boots propped up on the frame. “You’re not alone,” she’d murmur if you stirred awake in a panic. “I’ve got you.”

And she did. Always.

Jinx

“Wait, wait, wait,” Jinx interrupted as you tried to explain. She waved her hands in the air, wide-eyed. “So you’re awake but can’t move? And it feels like… what? A ghost sitting on you? Ugh, creepy!”

Her reaction was… very Jinx. But she didn’t brush it off, either. If anything, she got hyper-fixated on trying to “fix” it for you. “Maybe I could rig up something! Like, an anti-nightmare zapper! Or, ooh, a thingy to, like, shake you awake if it happens again!”

When it actually happened, though—when you woke up frozen, your breath stuck in your chest—Jinx dropped the theatrics. She was by your side in a heartbeat, tilting her head to look at you. “Hey,” she whispered, her voice softer than usual. “It’s just your brain being weird, okay? You’re safe.”

She’d flop beside you on the bed, all limbs and warmth, her rambling distracting you from the lingering fear.

Caitlyn

Caitlyn’s reaction was measured, thoughtful. When you told her about your sleep paralysis, she listened intently, her hand resting lightly on yours. “That must be… terrifying,” she said, her voice steady but laced with empathy. “Thank you for telling me.”

And that wasn’t just a polite response. Caitlyn made it her mission to help you feel more at ease. She started researching remedies and techniques, from adjusting your bedtime routine to suggesting a dim, warm light for your room.

When you woke up from an episode, Caitlyn was always calm, always present. “You’re alright,” she’d say softly, brushing a hand over your hair. “It’s over now. Breathe with me.”

Her voice, her touch—everything about her presence felt like a safe harbor after a storm.

Ekko

Ekko didn’t need much explanation; he got it almost immediately. “I’ve had dreams like that,” he admitted, leaning back against the wall. “Feels like you’re drowning, right? Like you’re trapped.”

He wasn’t dismissive—far from it. Ekko offered to crash at your place whenever you were feeling particularly anxious. If an episode struck, he’d be there the second you could move again, a warm drink already in his hand.

“You’re tougher than you think,” he’d say, handing you the cup. “Next time, when it happens, remember this: it’s just a trick. It can’t hurt you.”

His words stuck with you, even in the moments when fear clawed at your chest.

Jayce

Jayce had trouble wrapping his head around it at first. “Wait, so… you’re awake, but your body’s stuck? That’s—man, that sounds awful.”

Despite his initial confusion, Jayce took it seriously. He started brainstorming ways to make your nights less stressful, even crafting little gadgets to help you feel safer—like a motion-sensitive light that filled your room with a soft glow.

“I know it’s not much,” he said sheepishly, setting it up by your bed. “But if it helps even a little…”

When an episode struck, Jayce would stay with you afterward, his big hands holding yours as he reassured you. “It’s over now,” he’d say, his voice warm and steady. “You’ve got this.”

Viktor

Viktor’s reaction was quiet but deeply understanding. “I can’t imagine how that feels,” he admitted, his golden eyes fixed on you. “But you’re not facing it alone anymore.”

He spent hours researching, piecing together theories and potential solutions. He even programmed a soothing audio loop for you—a soft blend of ambient sounds and his voice, designed to ground you if you woke up in the middle of an episode.

When it happened, Viktor’s presence was a lifeline. He’d sit close, his hand resting lightly on yours as his voice—calm and reassuring—filled the silence. “It’s alright,” he’d whisper. “You’re safe now. Just breathe.”

Mel

Mel’s reaction was one of quiet strength. “That must be terrifying,” she said, her voice steady but filled with empathy. “But you’re not alone in this.”

She encouraged you to talk about it whenever you needed to, her composure making it easier to open up. Mel also suggested small changes—like silk bedding or soft candlelight—to make your space feel more comforting.

When the paralysis struck, Mel was the first thing you saw once you could move again, her hand tracing slow circles over your back. “It’s over,” she’d murmur. “You’re safe. I’m here.”

Her unwavering presence was a comfort that lingered long after the fear subsided.

See pinned.

[mythalism]

in my rook hating mindset now after that post this morning and cannot stop thinking about how they are literally the worst protagonist maybe in any story i have ever experienced JRHGKJERHGJERG. and like if you love your rook i am not saying you shouldn't. if you love your rook i am so so happy for you genuinely but you are also probably brilliant and have a huge brain because what the game gives you to build off of is so abysmal.

i literally cannot stop thinking about how insane it is that rook literally causes a double blight and worldwide catastrophe on a scale which thedas has not seen probably since the creation of the veil itself and just. experiences no remorse. and the story tries to tell us thats a good thing and makes them better than the villain/their foil. JHREGJKHERGJKHERG. HELLO?!!??!?!?! literally no one ever goes "hey maybe you shouldnt have done that" except solas and hes framed as the VILLAIN!!! WHAT!!!!!!!!!! hawke blames themselves for not putting the pieces together fast enough when a bouquet of white lilies arrived at their door? the narrative gleefully condemn anders with the immediate opportunity to kill him for his crimes. nearly every single character in origins immediately puts the entirety of the responsibility for the fifth blight on loghain's shoulders, regardless of the CLEAR SUGGESTION that the battle at ostagar could never have been won. and all of these makes sense for the world and characters!!!!! of course hawke would blame themselves for their families deaths when they were given the role of protector by leandra after malcom dies. of course the city of kirkwall is going to want anders dead for his extreme act of violence rather than start the uncomfortable process of acknowledging the beloved chantry's complicity in large scale abuse happening in the mage circles!!!! of course alistair and the warden are going to blame loghain for the blight and cailan's death!!!! it doesnt matter if they are right or wrong, it makes sense for their perspective and worldview to feel this way!!!!

have yall gotten the low approval conversations in inquisition????? solas's "Inquisitor. Tell me. How does it feel? Being you. Are you blissfully unaware or, deep inside, is some part of you banging on the walls, screaming?" cassandra getting drunk and practically spitting in your face how she regrets raising you up to such power? blackwalls' "Are you proud of yourself, of what you’ve built here? How about the lives you’ve destroyed along the way? Given much thought to those lately? Is this Inquisition all you wanted it to be? Because I’m disappointed. All I see is a gang of thugs led by a self-serving tyrant." and these SCATHING comments from those who once believed in the inquisitor enough to join their cause come from decisions that affect a fraction of the population that dies under the southern double blight. people will rip the inquisitior to fucking shreds when they fuck up. THATS THE ENTIRE POINT OF THE TRESPASSER DLC EHRGKJHERGKJHERG. like holy shit every decision carries the weight of "oh my god whos gonna hate me. who is going to die because of my choice. how is this going to come back to bite me." have we forgotten what its like to return to varric after leaving hawke in the fade and confess what we did? the call we just made? to look him in the eye and tell him that we sacrificed his best friend? WHY IS ROOK NEVER ASKED TO PARTICIPATE IN ANY OF THIS INTROSPECTION?????????? TO EVALUATE HOW THEIR DECISIONS AFFECT THOSE AROUND THEM BOTH PERSONALLY AND SOCIETY AS A WHOLE????? OH MY GODDDDD

the regret prison scene is so insane. first its insane because its solas at his best and most cunty. but secondly it makes no fucking sense even if im largely distracted by pookie being fun and villainous. solas tries desperately to play up rook's regrets during their conversations and we are supposed to believe that it was that manipulation that allowed him to swap with them in the prison. how does this actually work? blood magic? dont worry about it, kitten. but then when we get into the prison.... the only two regrets that manifest are things that just happened within the last 3 hours - your two party sacrifices. lets be clear that these are not even real sacrifices because literally all of these people volunteer to go and then argue about why they should go. this is so fucking stupid. then rook looks at the statues and says "i dont regret this because this was your choice". YEAH????? OF COURSE YOU DONT FUCKING REGRET IT WHY WOULD YOU. HELLO???? THIS WAS NOT ROOKS CHOICE THIS WAS ROOK JUST SAYING "SURE I GUESS". AND THEN THATS ENOUGH! THEY JUST LEAVE BC THEY CONQUERED THEIR REGRETS!?!?!?!?!??! WHAT!!!!!! there is no discussion of rook being responsible for the blight in the south that we find out via ooc inquisitior letter has KILLED LITERALLY EVERYONE. no suggestion that their recklessness and willingness to act WITHOUT ALL THE INFORMATION at the ritual is the reason for every single thing the evanuris do following their release.

and let me be very clear bc i know this was causing drama on twitter last week. i am not saying the double blights is rook's fault. i actually dont think it is their fault, although i do think they are stupid and reckless and shouldn't have acted so carelessly. but although rook is responsible for ghilly and edgar breaking free, rook is not responsible for the their actions following that freedom, and rook is not at fault for being put into an impossible situation (the need to stop solas's ritual) without all of the information on what the ritual was and what stopping it might incur. however, the double blight is rook's fault in the same way that the veil, the fall of the elvhen empire, elven mortality, and every demon's existence is solas's fault; which is to say, it is and it is not. solas was backed into a corner, in a desperate situation without knowledge of the potential consequences, and was forced to make a decision for the good of the world when he imprisoned the evanuris and blight with the veil. rook was backed into a corner, in a desperate situation without knowledge of the potential consequences, and was forced to make a decision for what they thought was the good of the world when they interrupted solas's ritual. but while solas feels immense guilt and responsibility for the choice he made, rook feels.... absolutely none. and the game tells us that... they're right? people should just not take accountability for anything? i will give credit where it's due here that varric's contribution to this scene is quite good and his line where rook tries to take responsibility for his death and varric says smth like "no, that was my own choice and you dont get to take that from me" is B A N G E R. WHERE WAS THAT ENERGY IN THE REST OF THIS FUCKING GAME!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?

THAT was the lesson solas needed to learn, not that his regret was wrong but that it was MISPLACED!!!!!!!!! and that is why it is mythal acknowledging that their burden is shared and not his alone is the culmination of his entire story and what finally allows him to move on. pride stands alone, wisdom seeks out the input of others to make an informed and wise decision. this is also why he leaves such breadcrumbs for the inquisitor (a high approval one, at least) because he respects their opinion and their input and their existence and the way they treat him turns him back into wisdom from pride. this is why a romanced inquisitor mentions his name being pride and how its possible that hes not even CAPABLE of changing his mind because it would be so against his nature, and he needs someone whose opinion he values to show him the way. his flaw is his SELF INFLICTED LONELINESS!!!!! NOT HIS REGRET. varric even fucking says this in some random banter you get with his ghost in the infirmary but im too lazy to go find it on my desktop. its something about how he sees attachments as a weakness rather than a strength. his pride causes him to take on responsibility that is not his, his wisdom -> pride corruption has led him to believe he is the only one capable of fixing the world's problems and he will destroy both himself and those he loves in the process. he asserts that he is just a man but is unable to stop making decisions for the world like a god.

THIS is the solas/rook foil that should have been: rook relies on their friends and that reliance is ESSENTIAL; after all, the neve/bellara and davrin/harding sacrifice is essential to win. in contrast solas refuses to rely on anyone, and this isolation makes him increasingly cruel. when he has no one to mirror the way a spirit should, he becomes Pride, too proud and too god-like. his attachments make him more human. he is terrified of depending on others and will kill them rather than risk the vulnerability of dependence after what it has done to him (mythal, felassan). he has to unlearn this avoidance and fear, he has to admit that there "could have been a better way" that someone else saw and he did not. he must learn that he does not have all the answers. he is not Pride. its NOT that rook doesnt experience regret and doesn't take accountability for mistakes while solas is trapped by his own regrets. the message we got instead is so incoherent. but it was SO CLOSE TO BEING GOOD. the bones of this are littered everywhere in both the game and in the datamined content and for some reason it just could not be brought together in a way that makes sense.

the message that rook is "right" and better for not having regrets is genuinely insane, especially when the "regrets" they have to conquer are literally just. other peoples decisions. the fact that rook has the audacity to say to solas that he could never escape the prison while they could so easily because he is trapped by his own regret as if rook is better than him is genuinely so fucking dumb it makes me want to claw my eyes out for having been forced to read it. rook sacrifices nothing and learns nothing. the sacrifices within the game belong to the characters that make them, rook does not order people to their deaths in the same way that solas or even THE INQUISITOR do. rook never is asked to grapple with the fact that they ACCIDENTALLY unleashed a double blight, no matter how good their intentions. WHY DOES NO ONE BLAME THEM FOR THIS???? regardless of if it is their fault or not, the objective truth of fault does not matter, what matters is that you make decisions and PEOPLE JUDGE YOU FOR THEM!!!!!!!!! THIS IS LIKE FOUNDATIONAL TO THESE GAMES JEHRGJKREHGJKRHG. this is what the entire game is about doing to solas. judging him. based on his choices. and the game clearly wants you to have empathy for him in the end. but its so OBVIOUS that the vessel for building up that empathy should have been ROOK EXPERIENCING THE SAME THING!!! THE SAME JUDGEMENT!!! THE SAME GROWTH!!!!! FEELING THE BURDEN OF THE WORLD ON THEIR SHOULDERS. FEELING THE DREAD OF GUILT AND SHAME AND REGRET. TRYING TO DEFEND THEIR INTENTIONS!!! I DIDNT MEAN TO I DIDNT MEAN TO IT WAS A MISTAKE!!!! LEARNING THAT THEY HAVE TO OWN UP TO IT BUT THEY ALSO HAVE NO CHOICE BUT TO MOVE FORWARD!!!!!! HELLO!??!?!?!?! they BARELY even express remorse for the treviso/minrathous sacrifice, even when faced with neve/lucanis's anger they just go "a decision had to be made and i made it". well. YEAH? LIKE YEAH THATS RIGHT BUT HUMANS HAVE FEELINGS??? YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE A PERSON, NOT A BLANK SLATE VIDEO GAME PROTAGONIST!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS OKAY TO FEEL BAD!!!! YOU MADE A DECISION THAT RESULTED IN PEOPLE DYING. ANY HUMAN BEING WOULD FEEL BAD ABOUT THIS. ITS KIND OF FUCKING WEIRD THAT YOU DO NOT. HOW IS ROOK JUST BORN BEING OK WITH THIS. ITS SO ROBOTIC AND ARTIFICIAL LOL

rooks actions are such a clear, perfect parallel to solas putting up the veil and the guilt that haunts him afterwards that i KNOW it was intended that way and somehow it just got completely shafted. it literally feels like they did have a coherent parallel going and for some reason were forced to change directions last minute and thus we got some mish mashed barely cobbled together incoherent nonsense with clear echoes of its former self. instead rook has no flaws, makes perfect judgements at all time, has unconditional support from all of their friends who also make perfect judgements, are immune to making mistakes, and the message is its actually just really easy to not have regrets if you just choose right every time and refuse to take responsibility for anything as long as you had good intentions :D

[scumsketches]

I've read like all 4 docs on ao3 about SY and SJ sharing a body, and I'm soooo not normal about this concept oh my God. So, it's time to ramble about my take on the concept, of course.

Most things I have read have SY transmigrate at his usual date, but... What if he didn't? What if he transmigrated when SJ was a child on the streets?

For the purposes of this, the person who has the most control of the body is based around soul strength, willpower, and collaboration between souls.

In the beginning, SY has very low soul strength, since he just straight up died, but being a child, SJ's is not much better. They both have obscene amounts of willpower, see canon. And at the beginning? Oh, SJ does NOT want to collaborate.

SY hasn't really gotten the whole "baby scum villain" thing yet, and thinks his soul has been glued to a particularly annoying street kid, so he tries to be patient with SJ, but it's not easy! Holy shit, this kid is a turbo brat who hates him! He is constantly threatening to exorcize SY! Like, kid, you can't exorcize me, you're eight. But SY does end up being useful at times, pointing out danger, reading signs that SJ can't, using his adult knowledge to help him as best he can. By the time they get to the Qiu manor, SJ grudgingly trusts and is maybe attached to his weird ghost hanger-on.

And then the Qiu manor hits. It's... Bad. Really bad. Qi-Ge is gone, hopefully to come back to them someday, but someday is not now, and they need to survive the day. Shen Yuan can't get over the fact that this is just a kid, that all of this is happening to a child. He is an adult, maybe he's not the most responsible adult, or the best person to handle this situation, but damn it SY has to do something.

The first time Shen Yuan takes over completely, it's during a beating in the first week. Before, even if SY had some control of the body, SJ was usually able to yank it back at least partially when he wanted to. He was aware of what was going on. But this time, Shen Jiu feels the first few strikes hit his back before Shen Yuan bubbles up, wrapping around him and pulling him down into blissful oblivion.

When Shen Jiu wakes up, it's over, and Shen Yuan is using some meager supplies he got from god knows where to tend to their wounds. Shen Jiu is scared, he didn't know Shen Yuan could take over that completely, but he's also... Relieved. And confused.

"Why did you take over then? If you really could steal my body, why didn't you do it earlier?"

"You didn't deserve that, Shen Jiu. I- how could I see that and not try and help? Not try and protect you?"

Shen Jiu froze. And then, slowly, started crying. Almost immediately SY starts fussing, asking if their wounds hurt too badly, if he needs him to dull the pain more. SJ sniffles, wiping his eyes, and asks; "More?"

Shen Yuan never explains that, but as SJ goes through the Qiu manor, he realizes that he is absolutely not in as much pain as he really should be. It's easier to bear when the pain is shared between the two of them.

The first time that Qiu Jianluo realizes something is off is during one of his lessons. As the brush is placed in Shen Jiu's hands, the angry, venomous child behind a mask of fear fades away, and he is instead facing calm indifference. The characters are perfect, every one of them, even the ones which there is no possible way Shen Jiu should have been able to know.

This pattern continues. Shen Jiu knows things he shouldn't. He is abnormally good at talking circles around guards and other servants, confusing and manipulating them enough to evade Qiu Jianluos summons in ways that couldn't possibly be his fault, orchestrating many of their confrontations with Qiu Haitang around as protection.

Shen Jiu is a good actor, he's smart, he's quick, but he isn't a fully grown adult master poser like our Shen Yuan is. Shen Yuan, number one rules lawyer and actor, is incredibly good at driving Qiu Jianluo up the wall without him being able to retaliate, and when he does manage to get in a beating, SJ/SY is not nearly as responsive to the pain as he should be, and heals faster than he should.

This is because the lovely new flowers that Qiu Haitang has planted in the garden at SJs kind suggestion are a PIDW plant that provides accelerated healing.

Eventually, it's too much, and Qiu Jianluo KNOWS something is up. He calls a rogue cultivator by the name of Wu Yanzi in to investigate the problem, and Wu Yanzi finds, and exorcises it. Shen Jiu is terrified and panicked, and Wu Yanzi, who had seen Shen Jiu's high spiritual potential, places Shen Yuan into a spirit trapping pouch and tells Shen Jiu to burn the Qiu manor to the ground and bring him as much money and jewelry as possible if he wants his little ghost back.

So the Qiu Manor burns, and Shen Jiu joins Wu Yanzi, significantly less willingly this time. Qi-Ge is nowhere to be seen, and Shen Yuan isn't there to save him anymore.

Shen Jiu supposes he will have to save himself.

[dindjarindiaries]

Risk & Reward

character: Hunter (The Bad Batch)

prompts: "Are you asking me out on a date?" / "I'm not drunk enough for this." / "I think you should kiss me."

warnings: alcohol/drunkenness

main masterlist • hunter masterlist

You couldn't understand why you had ever resisted coming here. For once, the boys had actually been right; 79's was the place to be between missions. And no, it definitely wasn't the alcohol talking.

How much had you had, anyway? Most of your glasses had already been taken away, and those that hadn't were starting to blur together...

You were mindlessly giggling at Wrecker jostling a disgruntled Crosshair around when a familiar, low voice cut through the noise in your isolated corner. "Alright, we've had our fun. Time to go."

You let out a long gasp and turned towards Hunter. His brow wrinkled with concern as his stare met yours, and your foggy brain could still process him checking you for signs of distress before you stumbled off your stool to approach him.

"Hunter!" You laughed and threw your arms around his neck, pulling him in for an embrace that, in this state, felt totally natural, despite the fact you had never, ever greeted him like this before. "Hi!"

"Uh..." Hunter politely tapped your back with both his hands, "hey."

"We missed you." You stepped back and patted his tattooed cheek twice. Hunter's brow shot up in response to the gesture. "Where've ya' been?"

Hunter's gaze flickered between you and the rest of the squad who stood behind you. "I've just been doing the rounds, keeping our relationship with some of the regs... amicable enough."

Doing sergeant duties on a night off? Yeah, that was classic Hunter behavior.

"Of course." You huffed and gave his shoulder a playful punch, but it barely made contact with your current lack of depth perception. "Do you ever just relax, Sarge?"

"That's a good point," Wrecker chimed in from behind you.

You whipped your head around to nod and point at him. "Exactly, Wreck, thank you!"

Hunter let out a heavy sigh, drawing your attention back to him—though his stare was on another one of his brothers. "Tech?"

All Hunter had to do was hold out his hand, and his brother provided him with his datapad. Tech pushed his goggles up his nose to hide his smile as Hunter read whatever was written on the vidscreen. He closed his eyes and exhaled through his nose. His free hand pinched the bridge of his nose as he handed the datapad back to Tech.

"And all of you let this happen?" Hunter reopened his eyes to stare vibroblades at his brothers.

"Who am I to set someone else's limit?" Crosshair sounded completely unaffected by his alcohol intake, even if the sly smile he wore was evident in his tone.

"That's another good point!" Wrecker added.

"I was too preoccupied with making note of everyone's intake," Tech responded. "It's fascinating, isn't it?"

A muscle in Hunter's jaw flexed. "Yeah, that's one word for it." He glanced at you and nodded. "We're gonna head back to the ship."

Hunter reached inside a pocket on his belt and set a hearty amount of credits inside Tech's outstretched palm.

"Pay the tab and meet us there when you're done." His brow furrowed at the three of them. "For your sake, make sure I don't have to come drag the rest of you outta' here."

Wrecker saluted. "You got it, boss!"

Hunter let his glare linger on them even as he set a hand on your back to guide you to his side. He then eased you forward, keeping his hand where it was until you were steady enough.

That moment never came.

Hunter's sigh was quieter than before as he slung one of your arms over his shoulders and wrapped the arm he had closest to you around your waist.

"I knew this was a bad idea," he muttered.

"Yeah, well, I used to say that too." You nudged him the best you could in your current position, which saw you practically resting all your bodyweight upon him. "But I'm glad I let 'em finally convince me, because I had fun! Do you know what that is, Hunt? Fun?"

Hunter huffed. "You're asking me that question?"

You shrugged. "I just really wish you'd been with us tonight." Your voice was low in your sudden embarrassment, which was dulled more than it should have been thanks to the haze that clung at the edges of your senses.

Hunter looked over at you before he let out a softer breath. "I'm sorry." His voice also lowered as he went on. "That's not the reason why you had so much, is it?"

You didn't say anything. Hunter took your silence as your answer, judging by the way he tightened his grasp on your waist.

After a few heartbeats, you spoke up again. "It's okay. You can make it up to me later by letting me take you back here. Just us."

Hunter's steps slowed beside you, but you didn't take much notice in your drunkenness. "Are you asking me out on a date?"

You bobbed your head. "Semantics." You spared a glance over at him and smiled. "Unless you have no problem with it, in which case, yes. Yes I am."

Hunter's gaze glittered with amusement and something else you couldn't catch in your haze, but his tone was dry. "I'm not drunk enough for this."

"Hmm. Shame." You giggled and swayed into him. "Could've fixed that if you actually stuck with us tonight."

Hunter at least chuckled at that. His hand on your waist gave it a pat as he nodded. "Next time."

You looked at him with wide, excited eyes. "So there will be a next time?"

Hunter raised an eyebrow at you. "Don't push it."

It wasn't much longer until Hunter was easing you up the steps of the Marauder. The drunken haze was beginning to morph into one of slumber, making your eyelids flutter as you leaned more and more into Hunter. He, of course, was unaffected by the additional weight.

But that didn't mean he wasn't going to comment on it. "Hey, you can't go to sleep yet."

You groaned dramatically and pressed your face against his armored shoulder. "Why?"

Hunter set you down in one of the chairs and headed towards the supplies. "Because." He reached into one of the crates and grabbed a canteen. "You need to drink a whole one of these first."

You wrinkled your brow as you took it from him. "Or else what?"

Hunter crossed his arms and stayed where he was, unshaken. "There isn't another option." He nodded at the canteen. "Drink it."

You narrowed your eyes even as you took your first big swig from the canteen. You wiped your mouth with the back of your hand and leaned back in the chair. "Can I at least get a reward for it?"

Hunter's brow rose. "For keeping yourself healthy?"

You rolled your eyes. "Whatever you wanna call this."

The corners of Hunter's lips started to rise as he humored you. "What did you have in mind?"

You stared at him, racking your mind for something as you drew another long sip from the canteen. But staring wasn't giving you an idea—at least, not an idea other than the deepest, darkest secret you weren't sure you wanted to confess right now. That was the thing about letting yourself loose, though. Those secrets were also going loose, too.

So, as you stared up at Hunter and studied the parts of him that had taken up permanent residence in your mind, you let that secret slip as if it was nothing more than an innocent suggestion.

"I think you should kiss me."

Hunter looked as if he was experiencing every single stage of shock all at once. His head whipped over his shoulder towards the open hatch of the Marauder, his senses no doubt reaching out to make sure you were still alone for the time being.

All the while, you continued drinking the water nonchalantly. He hadn't said no to your suggestion yet, so... if you kept drinking it...

"That's not a good idea."

You frowned as you returned Hunter's gaze. He was harder to read, now, his expression steeled the same way it was whenever he was trying to make a hard decision on or about a mission. It meant he was purposefully cloaking something from you, and seriously contemplating something.

But that didn't make the sting of his words any easier to take.

You deflated, and because everything was still running loose, you knew Hunter could tell. The canteen lowered in your grasp as your arm fell towards the floor.

Hunter knelt in front of you. "Not right now."

He was gentle as he took the canteen from you and brought it back to your lips himself. You followed his direction without much effort, tilting your head back to let him provide you with more hydration. Hunter continued his thought as he did so.

"Not like this."

You blinked innocently at him after you swallowed. "Like what?"

Hunter gave you a pitiful once-over. You winced in embarrassment.

His hand rose to your shoulder. "How about this. When you can actually walk on your own again, you can have the reward that you want." He mumbled the next part under his breath. "If you still want it then."

You perked up at that. "Really?"

Hunter nodded. "Really." He held up the canteen between the two of you. "But you have to finish this."

You snatched the canteen from him and chugged the rest of its contents. When you finished, Hunter's eyes were widened, and he released an impressed chuckle. You held out your arms to him.

"Help me walk to my bunk?"

Hunter huffed and nodded. The rest was a blur after that, but the memories of it all danced across your mind through the night until you woke again with your usual clarity—and a surprising lack of a hangover, thanks to the sergeant's insistence.

You swung your legs out of the bunk and stood. Only one other bunk was empty, making you smile as you easily walked your own way towards the cockpit.

Hunter swiveled in the pilot's chair to face you, hardly concealing a smile as he watched you close the distance over to him. You stood over his chair, crossing your arms as you gestured back towards the bunks.

"I walked here on my own."

Hunter rose an eyebrow. "You did." He sheathed the knife he'd been playing with before you walked in.

Your gaze flickered to his lips. "Can I have my reward?"

Hunter hummed thoughtfully and turned back to the controls. He lowered his hand over a button that caused the cockpit's door to close behind you, making you smile even before he stood to meet you where you were.

"It was well-earned."

And then his hands were on your face, his lips were on yours, and you were experiencing a whole different kind of drunkenness—one that was a million times better than any other.

[ominium]

farewell

character : gojo s. (i only say his name once, so if you wanna insert anyone else...won't blame ya) context : your husband forgets who you were (amnesia) and hangs out with his high school fling more than you :( pov : first person (reader) content : angst no comfort (letter no response) note(s) : yeah idk, had this thought at 5:00 am and, after a few days, decided to finally write it out

also gojo likes his eggs scrambled here with reader. yea idk if u think he'd prefer runny yolk then oops

—

In another universe, we would have grown old together.

As promised, we would have woken up in each other's arms, go on morning walks, share a sandwich, watch the birds fly by...

As promised, we would have grown a flower bed out in the countryside, have chats with our elderly neighbors every now and then, watch the sunset together...

When we first got back to our home after the accident, I had hope. I know it was hard for you to live with me, as you saw me as nothing more than a stranger, but I believed you could remember me. I had strength that our love would prevail, as cheesy as it sounds...I believed that you could remember me.

Every little aspect of our little life was still there. The way I still had to try extra hard to wake you up in the mornings, how you still enjoyed noodles that were a little overcooked and soaked with the broth, and even the way you sat on "your spot" of the couch. Everything was so endearing, and I wanted to believe that you hadn't changed.

The way you still greeted your old friends was all the same. Sure, you missed out on some memories, but for the most part, they didn't have to endure the pain of being asked, "who are you?"

It was nice to see some of your memories come back, too. When you had that nagging feeling that you just had to go to the local park, even though it was raining...all because it felt right. And it did. We used to take a walk on weekends to wind down and relax. Our hands intertwined, and just simply people watching. It re-lit what little faith I had left, and had me craving for more...more of you remembering our memories.

How you started going out every other evening to get some drinks. It seemed so...painfully absent in the home, but at least you were putting in the effort to remember.

So how...how is it that you seem to start remembering everything but me? How can you remember the way I liked my eggs scrambled, but not me? How could you remember how I liked the way I folded my clothes, but not me? How was my spot replaced with her?

Was it not strange that she would make you sunny-side up eggs, even though you said you didn't like the yolk runny? How she didn't walk the path you wanted to walk in the park? You brought her a beautiful bouquet wrapped in purple, yet the colors she surrounds herself with are yellow.

Why is it that I hear from Shoko that you were with her again? Why do I get messages from Megumi that you had to buy two bouquets, because you accidentally bought purple flowers again? Why is it that it seems you never come home to me? Why did I have to see your wedding ring on the bathroom floor. Forgotten.

Why do I wake up to an empty home, and go to bed alone now....

...You know, yesterday was our anniversary. I had bought a cake and even asked Yuuji to help me decorate the living room for us. It was...pretty awkward, to say the least, when he calls me and says you're at the bar with "that girl again."

To be honest, Satoru, I don't blame you. How could I? You experienced trauma, you have amnesia...you still see me as a stranger that just happens to live in the same home as you, and just happens to have a bunch of pictures with you, and even a wedding photo plastered in the bedroom wall. Right.

But it would've been nice if you had just...tried. Tried to come home to me. Try to spend time with me. Given me the bouquets because I love purple.

Tried to be the husband you promised you would be to me.

So here. I'm sure you've already seen them, but the divorce papers are under the letter. I've signed everything, and again I'm sure you've seen, but I grabbed all my essentials and left. You don't have to see me again. I placed our rings in the box they came in...thank goodness I saved it, despite you wanting me not to. You can do what you will with them...you did buy them anyways.

And I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I couldn't give more time to you. I'm sorry if I didn't try hard enough. But, I'm sure you'd understand...you've got holes in your memories that everyone wants to fill.

and I've got whole memories that I can't share anymore.

[howling-medic]

I just… this is perfect. I am obsessed with fourth age headcannons and theories. The interpersonal relationships and friendships between these characters are so special. I absolutely love Imagining how they would evolve and how their kids would interact.

I want to add a few ideas your post gave me:

Faramir Took would love to learn and expand his knowledge like his father and namesake alike, but he would also be the spiciest lionhearted hobbit - just like his father. There would be no foe too big for him, and he would train with the Rangers of Ithilien and the Knights of Gondor to hone his swordsmanship. Watching his son learn to fight would remind Pippin of learning from Boromir in Eriador. Later that night, Pippin would sit Faramir down and tell him all about his namesake’s brother and how Boromir saved his father’s life. Faramir would have heard this story many times before, but he would listen to it all again in rapt attention.

Elboron eagerly shares all his latest findings and pieces of knowledge with his dear friend from the time they are children - whether in person or in letters. Faramir looks forward to these exchanges more than almost anything even when it’s the most mundane of facts or theories that hold little interest for him. Elboron’s excitement is infectious. (I am simply ignoring the fact that it would take at minimum 3ish months to travel from The Shire to Ithilien, which would make it a six month process to get a response to a letter)

Both Elboron and Faramir would be treasured advisors to the other - Elboron leaning on Faramir when unsure if a situation calls for military action and needing reassurance that it is the correct decision, and Faramir leaning upon Elboron to temper his more impulsive nature.

The two fathers love nothing more than watching their boys play together and learn from each other. They sit together and reminisce on their younger and wilder days. Some days they one of them will get a far off look in their eyes and wonder aloud what Boromir’s children would be like. The other would sigh and say “would that he could share in these moments with us.” “He lives in us, and then in them, my friend,” the other would answer. For a long while they would both fall silent and gaze out towards the Falls of Rauros and Amon Hen.

Aragorn and Eldarion make a point to watch over all the children of Faramir and Pippin, promising them both to keep them out of trouble and keep them safe when their fathers pass, serving as a god father and older brother respectively. The task is a challenge, but they mostly succeed. Faramir takes to calling Aragorn Strider even when not appropriate, just as Pippin did. Elboron, while as quiet natured and scholarly as his father, also inherited his father's keen perception and ability to read people. With it, he inherited Faramir’s propensity for mischief and teasing - we saw Faramir in Ithilien with Frodo and Sam, he likes to mess with people. Rarely does it get him trouble, but every once in a while it lands him in a tight spot when he's a little to on the nose with his teasing or calls out the wrong noble for ill intent with no concrete proof other than vibes.

I have spent too much time thinking about these characters. I refuse to acknowledge how far apart they live, and I absolutely insist that they spend any time they can with each other even with canon distances.

Anyways, these were a blast to contemplate. Thank you for the inspiration!

Hey you know how Pippin and Diamond had a son and they named him Faramir? And then they introduced him to his namesake and he immediately gained the biggest uncle ever? And how Faramir and Elboron would pal around together and became close lifelong friends? And how Faramir and Elboron both took after their fathers, in that Elboron became a gentle scholar who helped restore lasting peace between Gondor and Harad and Faramir became the fightingest Thain Tuckborough had produced in generations and carried his father's sword and was known for leading the defense of the Evendim Road in the goblin skirmishes following the restoration of Annúminas? Okay so only the first line is actually canon but the rest is also canon

[jam3sacaster]

“What do ‘ya want me to do to ‘ya?”

(Rivals) Declan O’Hara x Reader

Suggestion by a sweet anon 🫶🏽 / Hellbent on pleasing you after an argument, Declan allows you to take control…

18+ FANFIC / SMUT! Short work! Something a lil different for Declan 💋 Reader character aged at 21.

Observing the most magnificent view from the bedroom window of The Priory, your heart leaped at the wintery scene — blankets of glacial snow covering the vast lawn, snowdrops billowing in the arctic breeze & tiny badger prints making a path under the grand oak tree. “Feeling better yet?” A familiar voice spoke from behind you. No, I am not, you thought to yourself. It was often that you and Declan had arguments, but they were monumental when you did — thunderous screaming matches that often ended in Declan having one too many a whiskey and you, retreating to your bedroom in a rouge mass of tears. “Ahh, come on. You’ve got to speak to me at some point.” He huffs, puffing on his briar wood pipe. No, I don’t, you think to yourself again.

Eagerly catching sight of the badger that had created the tiny path, you gasp in amazement and shuffle to the end of your bed. “If ya’ won’t speak to me, at least let me make it up to ‘ya.” Declan tuts, sitting next to you now, clouding your vision with pipe smoke. Not waiting for your response, Declan takes hold of your arm and lays you down on the bed, drinking in as much of your body as he could from under your thick, emerald-green woollen jumper and black trousers. “What do ‘ya want me to do ‘ya?” He asks, voice gruff and wanting. “Oh, come off it, Declan. You hate not being in control.” Eyes rolling as you mumble. “But you love bein’ bossy. Just tell me what to do.” He urges you, kneeling beside you.

“Hmm, well. I’m not in the mood, really. So, maybe lick me to get me ready.” You begin shuffling out of your trousers, but Declan takes over, removing them and subsequently peeling your vile paprika-orange pants from your cunt. Lying between your legs, Declan wrapped his rugged arms around your thighs, drawing your heat closer to him. “How do ya’ want me to do it?” He asks, hazelnut moustache bristling against your folds, making your thighs tremble in anticipation. “Gentle and slow. Like how you did it when we first got together.” You respond, grabbing at your own breasts lustfully. Declan began to circle your pink bud with his pointed tongue, flicking haphazardly after a moment and waiting for your soft whimpers. His coated lips took your clit between them, sucking softly. Your slender hand gripped firmly around his ringletted curls, moans increasing in frequency. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum if you keep doing that.” You groan, back arching in ecstasy. “Good.” Declan spoke through a mouthful of your wet cunt. “No, I don’t want to cum yet. I want to sixty-nine.” You moan, prompting Declan to free himself of his beige outfit. “Top or bottom?” He questions, devilish smirk creating tension in your stomach. You point to your soft belly, and Declan lowers himself onto you, being careful not to apply all of his weight.

The scene that played out was nothing short of heavenly. Declan’s cock was buried inside your throat, restricting your breathing and releasing a stream of tears from your glassy eyes. The Irishman, however, was treating your cunt like the most delectable banquet, grunting under your heat and leaving a trail of saliva hanging from his lips. Gyrating your hips towards his mouth, you rode out your orgasm in deafening moans — or the most you could manage through the girth of Declan’s cock. Thereupon, your moans were stifled by the emergence of Declan’s hot, sweet load pumping into your throat, making your eyes bulge from the sockets with pleasure. His orgasmic grunts rose to the most magnificent crescendo.

Pulling back to lie next to you, body sticky with sweat, Declan lit a cigarette and panted in exhaustion. “You’re rather good at following orders.” You joked, eyeing up his cock, still proudly at half-mast. “And you’re fuckin’ good at being bossy. Like I said.” Declan replied.

[utilitycaster]

I think my grand unifying theory of the vast majority of fandom, media literacy in fiction, and social media with strangers interactions really comes down to a lot of people either don't understand or don't accept that once you add humans emotions into the mix there's no such thing as a consistently reproducible result.

Some of this is that two characters' reactions to the same or similar events will not necessarily be the same (this is like 99% of Neve and Lucanis discourse). Some of it is that some characters fuck around and lethally find out and some merely experience unpleasant consequences (this is 100% of Liliana and Essek discourse). Some of it is that a particular type of character is popular within the fandom and a similar one is not, and while you should do a sanity check of whether this is due to prejudice, oftentimes it's the circumstances of the specific character's story, or they're actually quite different but have a surface-level similarity and are being treated as interchangeable when in fact they have wildly different appeals (Fjord and Laudna being a strong example here).

And outside of that, the most vicious anon hate and discourse I've received and that I've seen friends and mutuals receive is a response to one of the two below categories:

Why do you like what you like and not what I like (ie, an inability to accept that some people can see precisely the same show as you do and understand it and dislike things you love or vice versa)

How could I have known that my question would be something you didn't care for (ie, an inability to accept that other people have different feelings and preferences than you)

And really, it's not terribly hard to get past all of the above! But it does require that you accept you're not the center of the world and that other people have feelings that aren't yours and that there's no cosmic universal justice and that people can dislike something without it being bigoted and if you can't do those things it really is a sign you're not ready for, frankly, life as an adult.

[systemic-dreams]

Dragon Age rant

I need to scream into the void about Veilguard. I hate what the narrative did to Thedas and I need to be very bitter and petty about it. So here's everything wrong with Veilguard's story and why I'm being a pendant.

Have some warnings:

[LONG ASS POST WITH ANIMATED GIFS AND IMAGES]

[VEILGUARD CRITICAL]

[MAJOR SPOILERS FOR DRAGON AGE: THE VEILGUARD BELOW]

For context, I am a Dragon Age Origins truther. I loved DA2 for completely different reasons and DA: Inquisition was still fun, even if the story/villain fell kinda flat. (Also Solas stole my Lavellan's eyebrows and I'm still mad about it).

The games were by no means perfect but even with all their flaws, they managed to capture the imagination and the essence of the interactive medium of videogames, giving you the freedom to role play but also replay and experience the world from a different perspective. And it would reward you for doing so. When you got to the end, you would already be thinking about your next playthrough and your next character and the decisions they would make, happy to sink another 100+ hours into the game.

Well, I finished Veilguard in around 80 hours, and by finished, I mean two complete playthroughs to make every possible decision in the game which amounted to playing the same game twice just to see if they were hiding another better game underneath the one I already played but no. I trotted up to Elger'nan and kicked his flying ass and was suddenly beset by the ‘good’ ending where Mythal absolves Solas of all his responsibilities and the Inquisitor showed up to hold hands with the Dread wolf so the pair of them could walk off into the sunset (hellish tear in the sky) together.

As a reward, I was shown a bunch of 2D title cards with one sentence summaries repeating my decisions (or lack thereof) back to me without epilogue, most of them regarding my companions. And then my Rook condescendingly told me "At their heart, stories are about change…"

But we literally didn't change anything. In fact, we fought tooth and nail to maintain the status quo (Veil). Hence, we were 'guard'ing the Veil, though we're never referred to as 'the Veilguard' ingame. If anyone was trying to change stuff it was the Evanuris or Solas or whoever. The Veilguard, specifically, were trying to stop change the whole time, from the very beginning with Varric. And we had very little choice in the matter.

AND THEN! To add insult to injury, the game shows you the briefest of cutscenes with every inciting incident from each of the previous games: Loghain retreating from Ostagar, Bertrand being driven mad by the red Lyrium idol, and the Breach that marked the Inquisitor. All of these things are surrounded by a shadowy group of people with gravelly voices who claim that they have been shaping all these events, and that they are responsible for all of it somehow. And now that the Elven gods are dead, you’ll be hearing from them. And you see the symbol for the Executors - a mysterious organisation of spies from ‘across the sea’ that don’t have much of a role in DA: Inquisition beyond some minor missions. You could easily miss them without trying.

So, great! Not only has the South of the continent been destroyed, none of what you did there mattered because the Illuminati were secretly behind everything the whole time. And you’ve left yet another game on a cliffhanger. This, being the culmination of at minimum twenty plus hours of game time and cutscenes during which you have to sit back and watch this trainwreck of a story unfold, unable to do anything about it because they took away player agency in a role playing game. The only decision you make is whether you participate, or not. And the game punishes you for not slogging through all of its content with character death and faction failure in the finale if you didnt get the right number of friendship points.

I think that in a kinder world where this game did not use the Dragon Age brand or setting, and simply did the whole ‘my first queer high fantasy rated T for Teen’ dance, I would probably forgive most of its trespasses and move on with my life, but that’s not what happened. 

Veilguard took on the incredibly daunting task of living up to the Dragon Age name and the expectations that come with it, especially after the pitfalls of Inquisition. It wasn’t going to be easy - incorporating all the dense lore and beloved characters and hitting that grimdark yet hopeful tone of the setting while allowing for a breadth of decisions to have been made and to be made and to have a genuine impact on the story in a satisfying way.

It was unlikely they would hit the nail on the head but it wasn't impossible. And Dragon Age fans were rooting for it to come through, grasping at every whisper of Dread Wolf that never amounted to anything but title cards. And after Anthem bombed and Bioware scrapped Dragon Age: Dread Wolf, I kind of gave up hope. I think a lot of fans did. But then… a miracle! Trailers for Dragon Age: The Veilguard! And people accusing the game of ‘woke’.

For a moment, I actually believed. That our prayers to the Maker (Bioware) had been answered.

However, instead of fulfilling our wildest dreams, Veilguard dropped a cheap sanitized mockery of the franchise into our laps, sacrificing all the complexity, nuance and moral ambiguity of the Dragon Age we’ve come to know. All for an uninspired Marvel B-movie plot full of holes and inconsistencies, and worst of all, it took meaningful player choice out of the game in order to spoon-feed its watered down gruel to the masses, alienating a lot of loyal fans in order to pivot and appeal to an entirely different demographic while keeping the name Dragon Age for marketing purposes. In short - a study in enshittification.

So let’s go back to the beginning.

And the Maker said, “Let there be Character Creation.”

This is a fun opportunity to create a little person and inject them into the game as an avatar of your id - role play, as they say. Some of your choices are purely cosmetic since the Dragon Age setting doesn't really care about your gender or the colour of your skin (yay). This has been true since the first title released in 2009 - a time when the videogame scene was brewing gamergate and having more than one gender (voice actor) was a privilege not many developers could afford. 

In contrast, Dragon Age: Origins had not only 2 genders, 3 classes and 6 playable origins, but same sex romance options and complex bi characters (of wildly varying quality). And the game was received quite well, with great reviews and much acclaim. It invited women and those in the queer community to peer into the cishet male-dominated world of AAA gaming and high fantasy with an opportunity to be represented. And no one vilified Bioware for ‘woke’. On the contrary, people flocked to see the dodgiest jankiest cringiest sex scene known to man starring their self insert.

So all the character customisation that the new game allows you to do, from top surgery scars, to bulge size and choice of pronouns, really shouldn’t matter to any of the old Dragon Age fans. This is just icing on a cake that lets you make your usual white human Gary Defaultman look however manly you wish, and all the companions will fall at his feet (which wasn't true in previous games).

But I digress. 

While Dragon Age is unconcerned with gender and skin colour save what some writers might tell you on Twitter, DA is concerned about your Race and Class. To the point where non-human species such as elf, dwarf, and later - qunari, would have drastically different experiences based on the racial prejudices of the world. As they would in real life. For this reason, Backgrounds were locked to specific Races or Classes. And DA2 completely locked you into a Human hero due to time constraints in development. In Inquisition, we returned with the added opportunity to create Qunari (Kisoth) characters and the Inquisitor's race coloured the experience to some extent but not as much as Origins did:

You couldn’t be a Dwarf and a Mage for example because Dragon Age dwarves can't do magic. In fact, they are resistant to it. This is one facet of the lore that thankfully carries over to Veilguard, mostly to boost Harding’s ego and uniqueness but that little lock on the character creation screen seems foreboding for future titles.

However, the rest of the lore goes out the window as soon as you finish playing plastic surgeon.

You choose your Race, Class, and then your Background using the same time honoured formula, except in Veilguard, you can be pretty much any Race, Class and Background combo, which should be good, right? Inclusive and awesome? 

Well, it would be if the associated Factions were the kind any person could join. Something like the Order of Grey Wardens who accept everyone regardless of race, class, etc. The Lords of Fortune Background also makes sense since they’re treasure hunting mercenary pirates, not super picky about their initiates. But the rest?

If you choose, for example, the Mourn Watch faction - an order of mages that fill a niche somewhere between Exorcist and Ghostbuster - but you don’t choose Mage as your Class, how did you join the Mourn Watch exactly? Buy a proton pack?

Nevermind the highly elite status of the Watchers in the Mortalitasi and their secret puppeteering of the Nevarran King. Did Vorgoth find you in a tomb and teach you how to juggle knives and play with swords for kicks? What do you do in the Grand Necropolis as a Warrior or a Rogue that's vulnerable to possession? Stand back and ‘watch’ while the real mages deal with the spirits of the dead? Or are you just sweeping the floors like one of the animated skeletons?

The Veilguard page on EA’s website describes the Mourn Watch as:  ‘an elite necromantic order’, and they first appear in a short story called Down Among the Dead Men in an anthology called ‘Dragon Age: Tevinter Nights’.

Here’s an excerpt:

“Every mage in the kingdom of Nevarra was part of the Mortalitasi, a group that trained the gifted in the mysteries of magic. They served as Nevarra’s arcane protectors and priests. Within the Mortalitasi was a group of select mages invited into an old fraternity called the Mourn Watch. The Watchers served as elite guardians, keepers of the Grand Necropolis and its sacred repository of the dead.“

So, according to the story, the Mourn Watch are: a) only mages  b) only Mortalitasi (death mage/necromancers from Nevarra)  

So, Rook being a Warrior or a Rogue in the Mourn Watch doesn't really make sense. A Dwarf Rook wouldn’t even be able to perceive the Fade where spirits come from. It’s like a mage walking up to the Chantry and asking to join the Templars doing a mage hunt. It could be interesting, if the game did it on purpose to make a character unique, as Bioware has been known to do. Or it could be funny! A joke character which would also not be out of Bioware’s wheelhouse. (Never forget, Sandal)

But if you just blatantly ignore your own world building for no discernable reason right out of the gate, it’s clear you don’t take your own work seriously.

It’s so minor, but the game instantly breaks its own lore in character creation because the Mourn Watch are mages that deal with death magic, especially corpse possession. And here you are, running around trying to bonk spirits with a sword?

Why not use something else? Same anthology, different story. The Dread Wolf Take You by Patrick Weekes:

“There are others among the Mortalitasi who do other work—the Guides of the Path to shepherd the corpses, the Mourn Watch to deal with magic gone awry—”

I can’t get the image of a Mortalitasi Guide of the Path schlepping through the Necropolis with a bunch of corpses attached to their belt with magic leashes like a dog walker.

My point is, there are more groups of people moving through the Grand Necropolis than just Mourn Watchers, and since you’re, I don’t know, WRITING THE STORY, then create a Mourn Guard that’s all rogues/warriors with Templar/Seeker powers that can dispel magic and fight spirits and protect the Mourn Watch while they do rituals or something. Why not make Rook part of that? Why make this weird forced association with the Mourn Watch specifically when they’re so exclusive to mages? 

And what about the Veil Jumpers? They were founded by a clan of Dalish elves trying to reclaim their lost heritage in Arlathan Forest where the capital of the elvenahn empire was obliterated by Tevinter mages and now they just admit anyone brave enough to jump into a death trap of malfunctioning magical artifacts?

Let's rewind back to Dragon Age Origins:

"You were born amidst the Dalish elves: noble wanderers who refused to join the society of humans that subjugated their homeland so long ago. The Dalish travel the lands in tightly-knit clans, struggling to maintain their half-forgotten lore in a human world that fears and despises them." - Duncan narrates the Dalish Elf Origin

Fast forward to "We've evacuated three Dalish settlements already."

Settlements??? The Dalish? Surely, I have misheard.

"Any Dalish settlements we can save, we should."

Hah? Nani?

And then Strife hits you with the greatest bit of dialogue ever written:

"If we could predict where they'd strike next, we might be able to get ahead of them. But so far, they've been unpredictable."

Genius. Chef's kiss. Where would we be without you Strife?

So, let me get this straight: The Dalish - the cagiest of elves, who distrust outsiders to a fault and barely tolerate traders, always moving about to avoid the wrath of human society - suddenly had a change of heart and thought it was okay to admit dwarves, qunari and humans into their clan? Humans - the people who destroyed the city of Arlathan which they are now picking apart? 

From the Dalish perspective, why would anyone but elves care about ancient elven artifacts? 

Reason a) to steal them and sell them off later

Reason b) to make use of their power for selfish purposes, likely the enslavement of elves (again)

The former leading to the latter in most cases, especially so close to Tevinter.

So why would they risk the security of their clan by admitting humans? And why would the Veil Jumpers have Morrigan on speed dial? To the point that we see her immediately as soon as Rook shows up at the Veil Jumper camp?

I get it, you wanted to bring back an old fan fave. But as far as we know, Strife only met Harding and Varric when they came to Arlathan forest in 'The Missing'. So, how does Strife know Morrigan? And the rest of Clan Morlyn are just chill with bringing in all these outsiders? It's super out of character and I think the developers know this because if you walk through the Veil Jumper camp, it’s all elves and aravel. This is a roving Dalish clan.

The environment tells the story and Arlathan Forest tells us this place belongs to the elves, both ancient and otherwise. Maybe half-elves at a stretch? But creating a Dwarf Veil Jumper Rook makes no sense because dwarves can't cross the Veil into the Fade and the game admits it! When you step outside the Lighthouse and talk to Harding you get this dialogue:

Harding: Rook. You're awake! And we're... Rook: In the Fade. Harding: This is where people come when they dream. But dwarves don't dream... And somehow we're here! Rook: Yeah, it's... unreal.

THE RISE OF SKYWALKER OF IT ALL

And then you have a 'meeting' and Harding hits you with a-

Harding: "Except that dwarves don't dream, remember? We can't. The Fade is the world of dreams, and we're not connected to it."

Cool. I'm glad we all agree that this is fucking broken and doesn't make sense. Are you going to explain it? No?

Moving on then.

Half of Arlathan forest is weird portals through the Veil connected to the Fade. That's why they're called Veil Jumpers, they jump through the Veil, into the Fade, and back. This is something dwarves are cannonically unable to do. Even Harding in the beginning. So why is Dwarf Veil Jumper Rook even an option? Why would dwarves even need any of the magical elven artifacts?  

Don't get me started on a Qunari walking through a Dalish camp full of mages and seeing someone like Bellara just accidentally exploding things. Those mages would be in chains with their lips sewn shut before you could say 'saarebas'. It just doesn't hold up to scrutiny and the game doesn't make any effort to explain it other than "We accept everybody!" (yay?)

Conversely, the Antivan Crows would not accept a mage into their ranks for the simple reason that they're super Andrastian (Catholic). The Crows were originally an arm of the Chantry/Church - a bunch of monks that were very good with herbs, read: poisons. They lived in the hills of Treviso and (woopsie!) poisoned the despotic duke nearby, starting a dynasty of infamous assassins, thieves and spies. The Antivan Crows are a criminal organisation with high-ranking members among the richest people in Antiva, even royals, with dubious morals akin to the Godfather version of the Italian mob. But the game white-washes the Crows into underground resistance heroes instead.

Let's do a small fantasy reality check here. The Crows base of operations - the Cantori Diamond - is a casino they own. The Crows have more in common with Trump than antifa but we're supposed to think they're Batmen? Sorry. "Shadowy protectors". Notice how the thieves and spies occupation has been removed from the job description. Evidently, someone's been playing too much Assassin's Creed (or saw the popularity of it and decided to cash in).

Similarly, the game glosses over how a lot of lower level Crows are elves because humans find them more attractive and therefore more easy to fall for and get assassinated by. Or that the Crows will buy children from whorehouses with too many unwanted pregnancies. These children are kept and raised in Amazon warehouses cramped quarters, subsist on 'Crow feed', are subjected to harsh training including torture and are killed if they make any mistake, mostly to keep the rest in line.

We know this through a former companion - Zevran Arainai - and his adventures in the Dragon Age universe. But Veilguard turns around and shows us some kid named Jacobus that mouths off to the Fifth and Seventh Talon and the Governor and is somehow elevated to the status of full Crow and given his own House??? All because his cousin died on a job (that Rook finished).

Ummm. Cool? Equality in the workplace, I guess? Ignore the child labour or the fact that you work for the mob. And let's not think too hard about how the rest of the Crows would react to this upstart child (by sending him flying from the casino and into the canal with a blade in his heart), prodigy or no.

Cool. Cool cool cool. Let's not think about what this actually means. Instead, show us the beautiful villa where Lucanis and Illario grew up. It has its own Opera House! Wow, you say, as Veilguard continuously shouts in your ear: "Assassins are cool! The Crows are a Family! It's the elected government officials and the occupying army of invaders that are bad."

Of course, older fans will be aware of the difference between a First Talon's grandson and a whoreson the Crows bought for cheap in the red light district on the Rialto Bay. But new players will be blissfully unaware of all the child trafficking our 'shadowy protectors' get up to. Since that would be very squicky to everyone who wants to romance Lucanis - Prince of the Assassins (and thieves, spies, poisoners and child soldier trainers).

However, this doesn't remove the Circle of Magi from Antiva. What is a Circle of Magi, you ask? It doesn't seem to be anywhere in the glossary or the codex? Interesting. Since a whole war got fought about it in Inquisition. You know, the Mages vs the Templars? That old chestnut. Well, The Circle of Magi is where mages typically go to train in magic when their powers manifest. This is for safety as well as prudence because you could accidentally turn into a little demon if you're not careful. So there are these big tough people called Templars that watch you all the time to make sure you're not doing anything bad with your magic. But if you do, they can do this neat thing called the Right of Annulment where they kill every mage in the Circle to minimise risk :)

And who's in charge of the Templars? Why the Chantry, of course. You know, the Dragon Age Church? Hm? That's not- Oh, there is an entry on the Chantry in the codex - The Imperial Chantry! Oh, it's just a note from Brother Gentivi griping about the schism between the Chantry in Tevinter and everywhere else. Interesting. Oh, there's an entry on the Maker and Andraste. Huh... These seem kind of irrelevant to the game. I wonder why-

*never interacts with the Chantry*

Ah. I see. I suppose that would require the game to tackle squicky topics such as religious institutions and the corruption within.

An important factor, if you choose the Mage class with the Crow Background. Not that the game would ever tell you this. Employing an apostate (mage outside the Church's oversight) would attract the attention of the Templars and the entire Orlesian Chantry. Regardless of their faith in the teachings of Andraste, if the Crows were harbouring apostate mages and training them to be assassins, the Divine would call an Exalted March (murder crusade) upon Treviso. They've already done this once to fight the Qunari and wouldn't you know it? The 'Butcher' is occupying Treviso right now. How convenient.

The fact that Lucanis gets possessed by a Demon despite not being a mage is an anomaly. And the fact that he maintains his human appearance instead of transforming into an Capital-A Abomination is incredible but not unheard of. We see Anders from DA2 retain his human form, albeit with some cracks, when possessed by a 'spirit' of Justice so... okay, sure. A Venatori blood mage slapped Spite onto Lucanis and he somehow maintains his own body, mind and has room for a very agreeable demon. Unlike this actual Abomination from DA:Origins.

But Veilguard acts like it’s all very cool and not a hindrance to Lucanis' daily life. He just walks around having coffee and whipping his wings out to tackle the first baddie you see. He’s broody and reclusive because that’s his personality (not because he would be pursued by Templars through the streets of Treviso just for existing). And the other Crow families (an already slapdash charicature of Italian mafiosos) just accept the Demon of Vyrantium as the First Talon? An abomination? All because he’s murder-grandma’s favourite?

Who are these people? Because they don’t sound like Antivan Crows to me.

And Illario casually mentions that they have a mage on staff? In the first Treviso mission where you go to the Ossuary in a little boat? There’s a mage in a cute little Crow outfit? You have an apostate on call? Out in the open??? 

This doesn't make sense in the context of the game either because then we hear an NPC give us this exposition in ambient dialogue:

Scholar: "The Butcher seems more reasonable than most Antaam, but he still doesn't want any mages in the city."

So either the Crows are harbouring displaced mages that are being persecuted by the Antaam, which would be a very cool and interesting development due to the occupation of Treviso, or, more likely, the Veilguard writers just don’t give a shit.

Similarly, a Crow Rook openly using magic in Treviso is totally handwaved by the game as something normal and okay when they should be getting dogpiled by Templars and Antaam. You’re an apostate! Saarebas! The Chantry is going to make you Tranquil if you don’t run, hide or repent! The Arvaraas is gonna put a magic shock collar on you and drag you around in chains if the Antaam don't kill you first.

As for the Shadow Dragons, I don’t see how a Qunari in Tevinter would not immediately stand out as a Ben-Hassrath agent saboteur and compromise the organisation. You hear as soon as you get to Treviso:

Teia: "The Antaam reached a stalemate in their war with Tevinter. Some have turned here instead. Antiva was rich, comfortable... and has no standing army to stop them."

Meanwhile, the Shadow Dragons are supposed to be a covert abolitionist group in the most racist country in Thedas - Tevinter - living on a knife’s edge between blood magic and slavery. There would be humans, sure. Maybe an elf can pretend to be a slave to get around? Maybe a dwarf could be Ambassadoria or something? But a Qunari? Even a Vashoth. In Minrathous??? The city the Qunari are still at war with?

"The outskirts of Minrathous are awash in a sea of refugees turned destitute by the never-ending war between the Imperium and the Qunari." —From In Pursuit of Knowledge: The Travels of a Chantry Scholar, by Brother Genitivi

Storytime!

Myrion of Ventus didn’t know much about Qunari. Until last week, they had been an annoyance, something young soldiers went off to fight while everyone else grumbled about the taxes they paid to defend the Imperium from the savage ox-men. That ignorance had ended in a blast of cannon fire, and in less than a day, Ventus, jewel of the Tevinter Imperium, had fallen. The Qunari had cut down anyone wearing armor. Those who were unarmed, they had herded into different groups. The women, children, and elderly had quickly returned to their homes. The mages had screamed horribly as alchemical concoctions killed their minds and left them as empty husks who stumbled along, sweeping dirt from the streets with awful vacant stares, their beautiful gold-trimmed robes dragging in the dirt behind them. The men, however, had been put into work camps. - "Three Trees to Midnight" by Patrick Weekes, from the anthology Dragon Age: Tevinter Nights

But yeah, sure. Qunari Shadow Dragon. Won't be murdered on sight upon approaching the gates to Minrathous. No, sir...

The game doesn’t react to these wild choices. You’re just Some Guy Rook, blissfully unaware of the lore you’re breaking because the game doesn’t care about it either. It doesn’t punish you or make you confront your decisions despite letting you take these big swings. It just makes you recite all the same lines as though it's all a-okay.

I would love to see a Qunari Shadow Dragon narrative or to find out how an apostate mage became a Crow. These sound like cool characters that have a lot of complexity and story to them but unfortunately, Veilguard does world building like a tradie filling a sandbox in the playground - by dumping an entire truck of sand on it.

They let it bury the existing lore so you don’t have to think about the sticky consequences of your decisions or the less than perfect world you live in by digging too deeply into the past or seeing the structure it's built on. 

All of this could have been avoided with just a little care. Just impose limits on what Class/Race can join which faction. I know you can do it because the game won’t let you be a dwarven mage. And I know it’s racist. That’s the point. If you want to be inclusive of all races, you can’t just erase the discrimination a race experiences because it makes you feel uncomfortable. And if the lockout is too limiting, then maybe create some new factions that everyone can join instead of using the names of existing organisations within the Dragon Age universe for token fan service without enforcing any substance to the concept or history of them.

I know why they didn’t do any of this and just wrote a bunch of world-breaking hooey for the Backgrounds. It’s because it doesn’t actually matter! The little blurbs about your Faction and Backstory don’t impact any decision in the game at all. They don’t stop you or help you in any way past the starting equipment/abilities. You don't know the companion that comes from the same faction as yours, so you're basically strangers. The extra dialogue options don’t let you do anything unique or exclusive to the Background. So, of course, they’re a pile of nonsense. And players new to DA won’t know that anything is amiss at all, which makes it glaringly obvious who this game is actually intended for.

But hey, we gotta make all that dense lore accessible, right?

*eye twitch*

So, you pick a Backstory for your Main Character: "Rook". Even though both Solas and Iron Bull refer to it as 'the Tower' when they're playing chess in Inquisition. >_> (I'm not salty, you're salty.)

I chose Shadow Dragon Elf Rook for the ex-slave liberati spice (prepare for an extended rant upon elvenkind)

You would think that by choosing a backstory linked to a specific place, that you would know something about that place? Right?

Well yes, but actually no.

Cue the opening cutscene of Veilguard.

Seedy Bar with Varric -> Dumat Plaza. 

Varric: “Can you get us there, Harding?” Harding: “Rook, you’re with the Shadow Dragons. I figured you’d know Minrathous better than I do.” 👆 Piddly Shadow Dragon Rook: “Sure, but Minrathous is huge, and this is nowhere near my neighborhood. I can try…”  🥺 👉👈 

Really? That’s the best you could come up with?

Just for shits and giggles, I tried another Background and got this exchange instead:

Varric: “Can you get us there, Harding?” Harding: “Not a problem. I saw Dumat Plaza while I was scouting the area… It was crawling with Venatori. Follow me.”

So. This plaza that’s named after an Old God, that’s so obvious Harding spotted it on her first trip to Minrathous�� Shadow Dragon Rook doesn’t know how to get there??? Even if they grew up in Minrathous working for a resistance group using miles of underground catacombs to smuggle people to safety? You even do missions in them later because Darkspawn start popping out.

Okay, sure. Other Rooks won’t know where to go. The writers thought up a throwaway line to acknowledge it and make Harding take point since the player won't know Dumat Plaza either. You don't want to make an exclusive mission and assets for 2 minutes of gameplay. I get it. I just kind of shrugged at this since it’s the opening scene. But it happened so immediately that it really felt like a slap to the face.

Like, why did I choose this Background if it can’t be useful in the moment? At least say 'the demons blocked all the paths I know' or 'there goes that bridge lol' as it blows up or something cool and substantial instead of this blatant cop out that backs away from your own identity.

"Whatever", I thought. This is just the beginning of the game.

Boy, was I right.

Since I chose the Shadow Dragon Background, I was sure that I would have a rich connection to this organisation that frees slaves and battles blood mages. But no. Apparently, I've been completely cut off since I left the city. And have to be led to the contact by… my new colleague, Neve Gallus. Who I've never heard of before?

This is the dialogue when you first meet:

Varric: "Rook this is Neve Gallus, our local expert."

And what am I, chopped liver?

Varric: "She's gonna help us find Solas. Neve, meet Rook. Both of you have done some work for the Shadow Dragons." Neve: "Isn't that a coincidence?"

I GUESS IT MUST BE, NEVE! For all the good that it does.

This is what you get when you talk to her in the Lighthouse as a Shadow Dragon:

Neve: Strange place we've fallen into. But I'll work with it. You know me. Rook: “Do I?” 👆 Neve: "We're both Shadow Dragons, and both from Minrathous. Maybe our paths haven't crossed, but I know our work has. It's a start."

Cool, I'm so glad I get a whole special line of dialogue to parrot our stupid motto. Seriously? Shadow Dragons? What happened to Lucerni? I know, I know, they were disbanded. But at least give me Umbra Dracones or something cool. -sigh-

So Neve takes me to Minrathous and this is the special exclusive dialogue you get for Shadow Dragon Rook:

Neve: "Minrathous. The Heart of Tevinter. Somehow the beat of it always pulls me back..." Rook: "It's just how I left it." Neve: "It always is." Rook: "Do the Shadow Dragons know we're here?" Tarquin: "Neve Gallus. You only turn up when you want news. Or you've got some." Neve: "Tarquin!" Tarquin: "And it's "Rook" now, I hear. Rook: "Tarquin." Tarquin: "I thought you'd be gone for good." Neve: "How are things?" Tarquin: "Same old Minrathous. Mages not letting us poor ungifted wretches forget where we stand."

And then the Viper appears and you get the same dialogue about the relic as everyone else except there's a shiny badge on the side of the screen reminding you that you clicked a button a few hours ago.

Then they hit you with the:

Tarquin: "And welcome home, Rook. Try not to get yourself run out of the city again."

Wow. Okay. Maybe this is just the beginning. I’m sure there are exclusive missions for Rook to do since they helped save all those slaves and pissed off all those nasty Venatori blood mages in their backstory! I’m a recognisable face that had to flee the city! I’m sure there are some NPCs or rivals in Minrathous specifically for Shadow Dragon Rook to talk to. 

Maybe some templars will try to arrest me? Maybe there are whispers in the streets that I’ve returned? Maybe you have to wear a disguise to sneak into certain places? Perhaps one of the freed slaves recognises Rook and shows their gratitude, or sells you out to a magister? 

Anything cool like that?

…

…

*crickets*

My background might as well be Some Guy.

Move aside Main Character, because every mission in Minrathous is about your cool new companion, Neve Gallus - an Icy Tevinter Mage solving crimes in Dock Town. 

Sounds rad, right? 

She’s a hardboiled magic detective, but also a stylish lady with a cool prosthetic leg that's shaped like a metal snake! And she has a fancy cigarette holder pipe (that we never see again)? And a cool ass magic rod? A geometric shape for a hat? With a veil? What a concept! 

Imagine, taking a case that goes from the gritty streets of Dock Town, all the way up to the top. To the Archon's Palace floating above the city where the magisters concoct their evil schemes and shoot their magic laser beams at demons.

Surely, the finale of Neve’s arc with the Shadow Dragons will see us ascend to the glorious decadent capital of the Tevinter Imperium, to free indentured slaves who will rise up against their masters and help us slay some corrupt Venatori Magisters?! Maybe even the Archon himself!

…

No?

Really?

We get to choose the next Archon (magic emperor/king of Tevinter) in our seedy little hideout but not install them? 

We don’t get to fight anybody or even go up there?

And why? 

Because the Big Bad needs to take over the Archon’s palace in the final battle.

But-     wouldn’t it-   make sense for us to weaken the Archon and magisters so that Elger’nan can easily swoop in and take the palace like that?

Huh? That only happens if you let the Minrathous get destroyed and the Venatori take over the Archon's Palace.

But what if Treviso got destroyed and the Venatori never took over?

You still can't go up there?

Hmmmm. Feels like a super missed opportunity but guess what? It won’t be the last!

Turns out, with the exception of the opening sequence and the final battle which are heavily railroaded by cutscenes, you never leave Dock Town when you visit Minrathous. Instead of an imposing and extravagant Imperial city held together with magic, you get to run around a boring wet fleabottom of an area that’s not very big and reminds me of DA2's Kirkwall but wet. WHICH IS IRONIC because Kirkwall was the Imperium's slave capital in the south when it was a quarry. So the environment artists are on point. BUt the writers??

The game makes you return to Dock Town over and over, taking the same route through the same dank city streets, And every time, the bad guys are the Venatori, even if the Thread Crime Syndicate is involved, it's actually the Venatori behind everything!

You see, in Veilguard, Venatori is code for white 'mage supremacist cult'. They have a red/black colour scheme because of all the evil blood magic they do, not because they’re Republicans. And they all wear hoods to cover up their identities like the KKK so they’re literally faceless fascists when we mow them down. And we don’t interrogate any of that too much so we don’t feel bad about slaying them by the dozen. And I mean, 9 to 5 reaper duty on these people. I must have culled half the city and they still show up as a massive army at the end.  

But we don't interact with any Venatori outside combat situations which means we don't get to talk to them or interrogate them. We only hear them scheming and quibbling and genuinely behaving like henchmen in an evil organisation. We don't see them as nuanced individuals or their day-to-day lives or why they might actually do blood magic and slavery in their hometown. Heck, we don’t even see the social stratification of Tevinter mages at all. Where’s the hierarchy within the hierarchy? Where is the Altus/Laetans/Praeteri divide? In a single codex entry from Brother Genitivi copypasted from Origins, I swear. 

To the point that I still don’t know what Neve is supposed to be. I suspect she's Praeteri because according to her flavour text she was: “Born and raised in a working-class neighborhood of Minrathous.”

What does that mean in a city where there’s a servant class as well as a working class? Did Neve’s family have servants or even slaves? We don’t know and we don’t interrogate it. We just see her run around Dock Town in her fancy magic outfit (gorgeous btw) which makes her stand out of the crowd but she doesn’t connect with anyone except a guy named Halos who owns a food stall, and a Templar called Rana Savas - a cop whose dead husband is also a cop.

Way to be an ally, I guess. We ticked the activism box, gang! Chalk one up for ‘woke’ on the board. We can’t say 'fuck the police' or ACAB but at least our upper class private investigator is standing up for the little guy. Who, specifically? Halos the fish-fry who keeps trying to give Neve a grilled fish on stick (with all the scales and bones on it) on the house! But she always pays for it because she's so woke.

Sure, let's support small business owners, I guess. But how are you pandering to the ‘working class’ if Neve’s a mage?? That automatically puts her in the upper class of Tevinter, albeit the lowest rung if she comes from a non-magic family. Still! All vints secretly hope for a magical child in the family so they can magically pull themselves up by their bootstraps and into the upper crust. It’s a magocracy. There’s no other way up there.

A Praeteri magus is miles above any Soporati and lightyears above any slave in the Tevinter social strata. Neve’s family would have been thrilled! If the writers had bothered to give her a family, that is. 

And wouldn’t Neve be sent to the Imperial Circle of Magi for training as soon as her magic was discovered? Like- If you know even a crumb of lore, the whole ‘raised in a working-class neighbourhood’ line comes off as bogus virtue signaling because Neve would have gone to a selective private school for the genetically gifted before even hitting puberty.

There’s like one NPC in Minrathous you hear talking about coming down to Dock Town because he doesn’t fit in at magic school with all the snooty upper class mages. I wanna hear more from him! I wanna interact with these Praeteri more! Ask them questions! Beat up their bullies at magic university! But it’s just some ambient dialogue as you get in an elevator.

Mage: "How has the Minrathous Circle been? Getting used to the schedule? The lectures?" Circle Scholar: "It... It's fine. There's just quite a few highbloods and... well. I guess it's why I come down here when I have the time. It feels like I actually belong here."

-LATER-

Circle Scholar: "So I'm supposed to accept that they're better because of an accident of birth?" Mage: "That's just how the world works."

-EVEN LATER- Mage: "My family isn't Altus either. You can find success in Minrathous, even if you're not from one of the old families. Sometimes all you need to do is just act like you're a highblood. People tend not to question it." Circle Scholar: "But I shouldn't have to act like something I'm not just to get ahead."

Why don't we get this opinion from Neve?

We know the reason, of course - that would be problematic for the audience and force people to confront their privilege. Even if they support the lower class, they’ll never be of the lower class, so instead they get to live vicariously through Neve who selflessly devotes her entire life to the less fortunate of Dock Town. The game never elaborates on why, or her inciting incident, or her raison d’etre other than ‘this is my town!’ like a true hard-boiled detective.

We see only two other Tevinter mages with 10+ lines of dialogue who are conveniently - the good ones. And that's ONLY if you choose to save Minrathous.

Dorian Pavus - former DA: Inquisition companion and necromancer who managed to travel through time in very sexy gay way. He returns to Minrathous to take his father’s place as Magister Pavus when the crotchety old homophobe dies. We don't get word on whether he frees his Altus family's slaves though.

Then there’s Maevaris Tilani, a trans woman written very carefully so that she doesn’t tip off the cishets about her transness. She tells Rook a story about how her father presented her to the Magisterium as his heir when she turned 15, but focuses on the ‘woman' part. The Magisters all disapproved! Which paints them with a believable sexist brush, instead of a transphobic one to the average gamerbro. I didn't realise this until I spoke to some friends that only played the videogames, and they completely missed it. And when I mentioned Tarquin was also trans? Blank stares and dialup noises in the brain.

But this is all the mages we see up close in Minrathous because why would you want to listen to nasty racist sexist transphobic fascist wizards explain why they are like that? That would require empathy. Ew.

So 99% of mages in Minrathous are enemy NPCs which means we hear the same sound bites from the same cardboard cutout evil wizards bent on 'reclaiming their legacy' and 'feeling empowered'. They're all mad and power-hungry and infiltrating the government all the time. We even catch one of the evil wizards’ kids buying illegal lyrium relics (read: drugs) and getting arrested. But then the cops/templars turn out to be dirty, so the kid's dad shows up and he gets released immediately. It reads like a hamfisted metaphor for US politicians/elites at best, and a pizzagate conspiracy at worst.

The culmination of Neve’s big storyline in Dock Town is a fight with a blood mage called Aelia but we don’t hear about her until halfway through the game. Apparently she’s someone Neve put away a long time ago for blood magic reasons. Turns out Aelia fell for the Big Bad’s promise of power and used the forbidden yucky blood magic again and isn’t sorry about it!  >:( 

I guess we have to - get her!

The fight concludes with a beaten Aelia getting manhandled. You don’t even get the option to kill her yourself for all the evil bloodletting that she does. Instead, Neve must choose, I’m sorry no, that’s incorrect. YOU must choose FOR Neve to become either the Protector of Dock Town or a Symbol of Hope. And since the game doesn't let you choose anything else, you just give custody of this evil bitch to someone outside the party.

Whatever you pick, the cutscene ends with Aelia getting dragged away by Evek the Thread or Rana the Templar. The mob or the cops.  

PROTECTOR OF DOCK TOWN

Rook: "This ends here. Send a message." Neve: “Dock Town needs protection.” Aelia: "When this is over, I will bring it to them." Neve: "You won't! But I will."

- Aelia gets her ass handed to her -

Aelia: "I would raise us all. You-" Neve: “Enough. Dock Town’s under my protection. Elek.” - Aelia tries to stab Neve the good old fashioned way but gets intercepted by Elek the regular dude with no power -

Aelia: “Is this where you finish it?” Neve: “Rumour has it the Threads protect their streets.” - turns and walks away as a bunch of mobsters with lead pipes approach Aelia - -VS- SYMBOL OF HOPE

Rook: "Dock Town has you. And they see it." Neve: "They just want hope. A chance..." Aelia: "When this is over, I will bring it to them." Neve: "You won't! But I'll give it a shot." - Aelia gets her ass handed to her -

Aelia: "I would raise us all. You-" Neve: "I'll do what I can. Rana. Take Aelia. Make sure Dock Town sees it happen."

- Aelia tries to stab Neve the good old fashioned way but gets intercepted by Rana the Templar without magic -

Aelia: "You tried to stop me before!" Neve: "And if you escape, I'll find you again! And every time I do, Minrathous will see someone standing against people like you."

- Neve walks off and Rana arrests Aelia -

Because letting a crime boss drag someone into the shadows to be 'dealt' with, or handing them over to a corrupt police organisation, are clearly the only two options in this 'holy cow! it's the joker, batman' scenario. You can't kill Aelia yourself for all the murder and blood magic and kidnapping and colluding with the evil Gods that she does. You can't choose to rehabilitate her by sending her to a facility outside Tevinter such as a Circle of Magi (they'd probably turn her Tranquil but whatevs). You can't squeeze her to sell out the Elven Gods plans or anything.

It's a nothingburger decision that potentially puts a dangerous cultist back on the street in a few years ala the Joker and Bats. And if you chose Treviso over Minrathous, you don't even get the choice! You automatically side with Elek the Thread and Neve becomes Protector of Dock Town.

Player choice? In this role playing game? It's less likely than you think.

Either way, Neve gets a little boost to her powers and becomes a Hero of the Veilguard (this means she probably won’t die in the endgame). And if you chose Minrathous over Treviso, you get to choose a new Archon of Tevinter - Dorian or Maevaris, even if you aren't a Shadow Dragon. Neve will tell you her opinion based on whether she became a Protector of Dock Town (Dorian proposes radical change) or a Symbol of Hope (Maevaris proposes changing the system from the inside). But if you picked one, chances are, you were already gonna pick the associated one anyway.

Neve doesn’t leave the party if you choose the opposite to her pick. And the Shadow Dragons make absolute sure to tell you that they'll be behind you either way so you don't lose their support. There are absolutely no stakes to this and all you get in the end is a one sentence title card in the credits about Minrathous and the leader you picked.

If you chose Treviso over Minrathous, then you automatically get Protector of Dock Town and Dorian. No epilogue or anything. You don't even know it's an option.

But you can only see the true result of your actions if you chose Minrathous over Treviso:

Protector of Dock Town - Elek the Thread gives Neve the title and control of the Thread Crime Syndicate in a cutscene. She becomes a mob boss and brings the organisation into the fold of the Shadow Dragons by introducing Elek to the Viper at the Cobbled Swan and tells Elek: "If I'm not here: he asks, you answer."

Symbol of Hope - Rana Savas quits being a templar (cop) and starts a detective agency with Neve. She is introduced to the Viper at the Cobbled Swan. Neve gets a couple of leads on Venatori plans but they're not missions for you to do, and they have nothing to do with the Elven Gods. (you find a letter from Aelia in the Gaspin Manor in the Hossberg wetlands) However, Neve is painted to be a Hero and this is considered the good ending. Again, we can't say ACAB because there's one good cop that quit :/

None of this affects the final battle or anything but party banter.

And what does Rook get for all this wanton murder? 

You guessed it!

*tumbleweed*

Nothing :)

Fine. You didn't have time to write a bunch of bespoke shit for Rook. I get it. Gamedev crunch is bitch. But hey, uh... where are the slaves?

Hm?

You would think, since Shadow Dragon Rook helped rescue all those slaves in their backstory and keeps broken chains in their bedroom as a macabre reminder, we would see some slaves or ex-slaves in Minrathous, right? Liberati, maybe? I mean, this is such a big problem for the city that an organization like the Shadow Dragons has to exist in secret for fear of reprisals. You would think that you would interact with people that are currently enslaved, right?

Unfortunately, that would be problematic so what happens is... we don’t interact with any actual slaves in Tevinter. 

At least I didn’t in my eighty something hours of gameplay.

The closest you get is a mission where some Dock Hands get captured and put in cages and then you find some pieces of paper that say the Venatori are going to sacrifice them for a big ritual. So, they're trafficking people to kill them. But they're not technically slaves.

The only actual Venatori Slave I found was in the Grand Necropolis in Nevarra! And we have to immediately backpedal to say there are no slaves in Nevarra so you're not technically a slave!

Venatori Slave: They said... they said I'd spilled the wine too many time. That I'd be a better sacrifice than a slave.

Emmirch: You are in Nevarra, sir. There are no slave on our soil.

Didn't realise you felt so strongly about slaves, Emmrich. Considering what you do to the dead :x

But Minrathous is supposedly the capital of the Tevinter Imperium, the slaver capital of the world of Thedas. The only country where this practice is not only legal but government approved. The government buys slaves for public infrastructure - Servus Publicus. In Dragon Age 2, your companion Fenris says that the Minrathous Slave Bazaar is a street ten miles long. So they should have slaves there, right? In the shops? On the streets? Waiting on nobles? Carrying stuff? They would supposedly come in via ships through the docks in DOCK Town? RIGHT? 

So... where are they? Because I sure as Hell didn't see any on my fiftieth mandatory loop of Dock Town. Just a bunch of beggars and peasants and criminals ala every medieval fantasy RPG town. So either, the Shadow Dragons are doing their job a little too well or the gamedevs have decided to sanitize the whole thing so you don't have to deal with anything as problematic and upsetting as the visual representation of slavery. 

*checks ESRB rating for Veilguard*

MATURE 17+ Blood, Nudity, Sexual Themes, Strong Language, Violence

Okay, so… “What’s shapin'?” as Rook would say.

Slavery’s been one of the biggest socio-political issues in Thedas since the beginning. It's incredibly important to the plot of the game since the Big Bad - Solas - is an ‘elf’ that caused the downfall of his people, allowing them be enslaved by the Tevinter mages for over a millenia. I mean, your companion in DA2 was experimented on by a Tevinter mage and slaver and you met him in person! Danarius went to Kirkwall to collect his ‘property’ referring to a person! The Gallows in Kirkwall were built to intimidate slaves fresh off the boat. And you’re telling me, that in the capital of Tevinter, you can’t see any slaves? You can't interact with any of them? And the closest you get to slavers is Venatori brandishing glowing red hooks? 

And WHERE is all the blood for these hooks coming from, pray tell?

The game constantly forces you to destroy these 5 foot floating red crystals that power magic walls and protect evil wizards but it doesn’t elaborate on how they’re made. We're told the Venatori do blood magic i.e. casting spells using blood instead of a Chantry approved rock called Lyrium. There's mention OF Red Lyrium - Lyrium's evil blighted cousin that makes you go crazy, paranoid and homicidal. However, the Venatori just look like regular clansmen. I mean, they’re homicidal, but only because I broke into their secret hideout during a clan meeting. We arrested that one guy trying to smuggle Lyrium relics into the city.

So, did the Venatori blood mages donate the blood for all the crystals in Minrathous themselves? Was it locally sourced? Organic? Free range blood? Fully consented to donating? Hmmm?

The closest we get to an explanation is one mission where a woman's husband, Atticus, goes missing. You follow the trail to a mage called Linus whose son is sick (boohoo), so he decides to do this:

WooooOOooo. Blood magic bad and scary. Everyone died. It was a Demon of Desperation's fault. Not the mage that did this, no. We have to be sympathetic to this piece of shit apparently. The game doesn't explain how this was supposed to help his son or what happened to Linus. And Atticus wasn't a slave, just some guy that walked into the wrong bar that may or may not be trafficking people.

I guess it’s technically not slavery if you kidnap a person and kill them afterwards. That’s just plain old murder. Much easier to think about killing people like Aelia in retaliation for murder instead of thinking about the hows and whys of blood magic for two seconds. Because blood magic problematic and nasty, YUCK!

Just to rub it in, Neve and Emmrich - two of the Veilguard party's mages, will talk to each other about Never Ever Never doing a blood magic because it's bad and evil. Even though one of these characters is a straight up Necromancer Death Mage and Fade Expert while the other comes from a city of blood mages.

Neve: "So. Necromancy's your calling." Emmrich: "Like most Nevarran mages. I hope it's not a concern." Neve: "We'll find out." Emmrich: "Your own practice - your work must find you in dangerous corners. Your experience with blood magic... Neve: "You want to know if I've tried it myself." Emmrich: "Well, in so many words..." Neve: "Never have. Never would."

Okay. Cool. Glad that no one in the party has blood magic cooties.

The game doesn't elaborate as to why blood magic bad. We're shown a bunch of dead bodies and left to make our own assumptions. But it doesn't tell you that can use blood magic to do a bunch of stuff, including regular magic, just using your own blood as a spell component.

So let's get into it since Veilguard flip flops around it like a fish.

Reasons why blood magic is bad:

a) you can use it to control blood, literally. mess with people’s thoughts and free will, walk their dreams and send them to the Fade. (you can do this with Lyrium too because it's also blood)

b) it attracts demons from the Fade. They hone in on mages, possess their bodies and transform them into abominations. 

With Reason B, a mage is tempted by the demon to submit in exchange for power, sometimes verbally, sometimes they see tempting illusions over the warped world of the Fade which will keep you happy and dreaming forever if it can. The demons talk in your head and even take control of your body while this happens. 

BUT mages don't even have to do blood magic for this to happen. A side effect of being a mage in this world is that you are a target for demons and spirits in the Fade whether you use blood magic or not. You could enter the Fade in a dream and encounter a demon and if you're not prepared/strong enough, it will trap you there and possess your body. That’s why mages get locked in towers and supervised by Templars for the rest of their days. Why the Qunari chain their mages and sew up their mouths and cut off their tongues! Because demons could invade your body at any time if you show even a slither of weakness (or so they say)

There’s also the Chantry - the Dragon Age Catholic Church with its own Vatican in Orlais (France). They think blood magic is heresy and sin and bad. They think if you leave a mage alone they will inevitably be tempted into blood magic, so all mages need to be locked up in towers and supervised by armed guards that take super Lyrium (cocaine) to disable your spells JUST IN CASE. This Circle of Magi is where you put all the mages. They also make a Phylactery with the mages' blood in case they run away so the Templars can track you. (Blood magic is okay if you’re with the Chantry ;) 

As well, the Chantry/Circle controls the Lyrium that mages get, and consequently, they control all the big spells they can cast. But you can’t control mages if they’re just using their own blood for magic, can you? Then we wouldn’t need Circles of Magi! And what about the Lyrium trade with the dwarves? How would they live without all the gold they currently make? Won’t somebody please think of the economy?!

The topic of magic is a complex one in Thedas. But do your companions discuss it in Veilguard? 

No. 

Does Veilguard bring it up in even a vague way?

No.

Even though the whole Mage vs Templar war was a big part of Inquisition. In Veilguard, you don't hear about the Chantry. You don't hear about the Circle of Magi. You don't hear about the Templars (except the toothless Tevinter templars who allow ethically sourced blood magic as long as its from a donor).

So all the decisions you made in Inquisition? That's right. They mean nothing!

The only choice you make in Veilguard is whether the Inquisitor disbanded the Inquisition or gave full control of it to Divine Victoria. The game doesn't reference who became Divine Victoria so that decision doesn't matter either!

Instead of a multifaceted discussion on the ethics of magic, it's white washed into 'all magic is good, Actually. Except blood magic. Peeeyeeew.' We're told even Necromancy can be Good. Just look at Emmrich Volkarin! He's such a gentlman. He has a little skeleton butler. And the Rivaini Seers let themselves be possessed by spirits because they're sooo progressive.

Meanwhile, all blood magic is taboo. In the city of blood mages and slavers built on blood magic and slavery. All we see is aesthetically pleasing red crystals dotted about Dock Town. We hear people disappear sometimes and sacrifices happen. But what are the rituals for? What do they actually do? Because Aelia set up an evil IV drip with all those people she kidnapped for some reason and the closest we get to an explanation is when Neve looks up some magic CCTV footage.

Aelia: "The risen God will unlock my true power. He's given me Vena Vitalis. We start there." Rook: "What's Vena Vitalis?" Neve: "A rumour. An Old Tevinter ritual used to increase blood magic."

Cool. A blood magic ritual to increase blood magic. Nice!

Instead of differentiating and creating nuance, the game uses the term 'blood magic' to mean 'mind control' or 'bad magic' but it doesn't actually mean that or say that. If you look at the Veilguard glossary the definition for Blood Magic is:

The use of blood to fuel powerful spells. Most nations have banned blood magic because it can be used to cloud or even control people's minds.

Similarly, the Big Bad, Elgar'nan, we're told did blood magic to control elves and enslave them (boo!). We see him and Ghilan’nain manipulate the Blight with blood magic to mind control the people of D’Meta’s crossing. But then he goes to do a ritual in Arlathan and his Archdemon rises. He has a bunch of Dalish sacrifices (supposedly he needed the purest elven blood available). But we rescue them and... then he does a ritual where he sacrifices a whole bunch of Venatori? For what? That wasn't the ritual to make the Red Lyrium Dagger. So… what's it for?

It's not clear what his entire goal is because he appears unblighted at the beginning of the game. Completely uncorrupted, just tyrannical and shitty despite being trapped on the Blight side of the veil for xxxx amount of years. Ghilan'nain, we can see, is 100% munted. But she doesn't need rituals. She'll just see two dead bodies and not ask before slapping them together to make a cool new monster.

Even Solas, the Big Bad we’re supposed to be sympathetic to, will shout in your head at the beginning of the game “I ABHOR BLOOD MAGIC!” right after he did a blood magic to get in your head.

Meanwhile in Inquisition, when you ask about learning blood magic, Solas says,  

“I would teach you, if I knew it. Unfortunately, using blood magic seems to make it more difficult to enter the Fade. You understand why I never bothered to learn it. A shame, as it is extremely powerful. Provided it remains a tool, not a crutch… nor a passion.” 

He doesn’t use blood magic in Inquisition but has no problem doing it in Veilguard? When you catch up to him at the finale, he says,

“Yes. I was wrong to do so. I was desperate. Unless I escaped, the world would fall to tyranny and blight. The only tool I had was my tenuous connection to you.” “Blood magic.” 

Okay. Cool. So you never learned how to do blood magic but you did a blood magic somehow and now you regret it. God of lies, indeed. And how did you bind the Evanuris to the Veil, Solas? If not with blood magic and a certain dagger, hmmm? Since we have to stab you to bind you to the Veil. Wouldn't that mean you had to get the blood of all the other Evanuris to do your big ritual to create the Veil begin with? Hmmmm?

It's just non-commital nonsense.

And how about the elves, huh?

You would think that Elf Rook would encounter some hostility while existing as an elf in Minrathous, aka Racism City. Perhaps they might even get mistaken for a slave by a templar and asked who they belong to? What would be Rook’s reaction to that? 

Tell the truth? 

Lie and play along? 

Fight and get arrested? (followed by a hilarious prison break)

A classic Dragon Age scenario. Maybe you have to skip town for a while if it goes poorly? We’ll never know because Veilguard never lets you be discriminated against. Even though the subjugation of the elves has been a polarizing topic throughout the series. It's mentioned in Veilguard but never demonstrated in practice so it sounds more like a myth than a reality.

From the get-go of Dragon Age, from even character creation in Origins, you are told that elves are second class citizens that live in walled off Alienages (ghettos) on the edge of cities. The discrimination is constant. Even the ‘free’ Dalish Elves are racist to City Elves for cowing to humans.

But did anyone call me a 'knife-ear' (a slur) in Veilguard? 

No. Of course, not. And I hate to say 'because of woke' like a right-wing incel edgelord but damn, y'all aren't making it easy.

Veilguard completely side-lines slavery and elves as second class citizens despite the whole story revolving around Solas vs the Evanuris - Elven Gods who enslaved elves. And even though I picked the elf race for my story, I encountered zero discrimination whatsoever. It was a perfect liberal idealist utopia that has never existed in the real world, let alone Thedas.

I know I'm complaining that no one was racist to me or shouted slurs at me in a video game but if a drag queen walked into a Trump rally, I don’t think she would have a very good time. So when Rook walks around Minrathous with their helmet off and everyone’s just cool with it, some alarm bells start ringing. Like, is the game glitching? Am I accidentally registering as human or something? Did I load the wrong character? 

No?

Hm :(

Just another bullet point in a long list of things Veilguard gives lip service to but in practice, ignores or makes fun of.

You can’t just say slavery is a big deal through every character’s mouth and then not show it happening in the place where it happens frequently and so much they did wars about it. You can't just say elves face discrimination and then evenly distribute them throughout every NPC and map while removing the Elven Alienage that ought to be in every city. You can't just say 'blood magic bad because bad guy did it' and then turn around and say 'actually all magic is blood magic because lyium is Titan blood but it's okay for you because you're a hero'.

It's juvenile and condescending. Instead of being thought provoking and asking questions about fantasy ethics, Veilguard presents you with a simplified trolley problem with one track and a timetabled departure. You don't get to think about anything yourself because the lore is completely overshadowed by the irreverent narrative of Veilguard. It just bulldozes the world building and doesn't stop to answer questions.

The Tevinter mages buried the elven city of Arlathan and enslaved the whole race for a thousand years. The entire Andrastian faith is based on a woman inspiring elven slaves to rise up and join her armies as she marched on Tevinter and specifically Minrathous. The allegory for Jesus/Joan of Arc in this world was killed by a Tevinter mage for daring to empower slaves. Yet, this is only explained in some optional codex entries in game.

And when characterising Solas, the game keeps yapping on about how he freed slaves or fought against slavers and tyranny, and we see… what? Some broken chains on the ground in the opening sequence with no sign of a living being having existed there at any time. We get one weird flashback where we have to save the slaves! Then we open a gate and there’s three elves in there happy to escape Elger’nan and the game suddenly code switches to call them 'captives'. Which is it?

Were they slaves or were they captives?

It's the same story in Minrathous. You see a couple of NPCs that were kidnapped and were going to be sold to Venatori for ????? evil reasons. But they're not slaves. They're 'captives' or 'prisoners'.

The only time you really see the concept of slavery in play is in a mission to rescue some Dalish elves from being sacrificed in Elger'nan's big scary ritual. We see slaves being used for laughs to make the bad guys seem comically bad, heads bowed and being forced onto all fours to act like living chairs for the Venatori. You can't talk to these people. You can only listen to what their evil masters are saying so you hate them more.

Haha. So funny. I'm glad we can make light of this instead of treating it like a serious issue.

What's worse, your companion, Neve, pretends to be a Venatori cultist during this mission, while you and some other companion, in my case Bellara, are her entourage. There’s a brief exchange where Neve pretends to be a snobby caricature of a Tevinter mage and the guard is so stupid he lets you through without any cross examination despite also being Venatori? Again, they didn’t explain the social order of mages in Tevinter so I’m assuming Neve pretended to be an Altus mage and this guy is Laetans at best. But you get to pat Neve on the back for the horrible weight she had to endure - pretending to be a bad person (yuck!)

And then you rescue the Dalish and everyone is like, yaaay Solas.

Seriously?

We did all that work for 10 NPCs without names thanking Rook for being their saviour?

There was an Archdemon to fight right there! *points across the bay*

There was an Elven God right there! 

By the way, did you know that the Old Gods of Tevinter were actually just dragons enslaved by the Elven gods? Yeah, those cool evil Archdemons that started this whole Blight business in Thedas were somehow bound by the Evanuris with (blood) magic. We see some graffiti about it in the opening scene while chasing after Solas in as they say - foreshadowing~~ 

So each Elven God/Evanuris had a dragon/archdemon who was bound to them apparently. And the God was immortal until you slew their dragon which I would argue makes you iMortal+ * 

*T&Cs apply.

But how convenient, right? The elven gods are bad. They’re also controlling Tevinter’s Old Gods that are also bad. They also started a war with the Titans and killed them and made their dreams so angry they turned into an evil plague. And once the Titans were destroyed, they split into thousands of… *checks notes*... dwarves. The Titans were thousands of dwarves in a trenchcoat, and their blood is… Lyrium.

Wait a second… We’ve been doing blood magic this whole flippin’ time?! Just mining the corpses of Titans for calcified magic blood?

Cool. 

Cool, cool, cool. 

I’m glad everyone has been twisting my arm about this since Dragon Age Origins. Merill was fucking right. Justice for Merill from DA2! Where is she btw? You know, the Dalish elf that figured out that blood magic was just magic? That spirits and demons were all just spirits and equally dangerous? That Eluvians were incredibly rare magical artifacts that let you basically teleport everywhere? Shame the one she found was blighted but she cured it somehow! Merill the real MVP of this franchise. And do we see this amazing companion return and give us a humble ‘I told you so’?

Absolutely not.

Solas just tells you the bad guys are the bad guys and they did all this bad stuff and they don’t regret it and he imprisoned them because they suck. In fact, it’s Solas’s fault none of us have magic anymore and you have to ‘live through’ a bunch of flashbacks of Solas leading a rebellion against the Evanuris. Which would have been cool if more than five character models could be on the screen at any one time. The rallying cries to the armies of spirits and elves felt so awkward. It was just me and Jerith from Accounting exchanging side-eye.

The awful thing is that there’s brilliance in the way the first three games set up the world to work on biased information that wasn’t really correct yet everyone believed it thanks to the prevalence of the Chantry/Church. And if the writers on Veilguard had done a better job, all of these revelations would be devastating. I’m talking KOTOR reveal level of mind blowing. Maybe they got close on Dread Wolf before they pulled the plug? We’ll never know.

Because all we got was - the bad Elves are actually bad for everyone (except the Qunari). They did everyone dirty (except the Qunari) so you can all come together to defeat them and feel good about it and there’s no reason to feel conflicted or look into it any deeper. And all the elves are totally on board with killing their Gods for some reason. This isn’t a divisive issue for anyone. No one joins Solas even though he’s also an elven God. And the only people who join the Evanuris are tyrants and bullies as Solas tells Rook. What a coincidence - that’s all of our enemies! Thank goodness no people we actually like end up siding with the Bad Guys. Phew.

Because the pantheon of Elven Gods aka the Evanuris aka the Illuminati, not the Illuminati from the beginning of this rant mind you, but the sub-Illuminati controlled by the Executors, so I guess the Evanuris are like the Anti-Vaxxers of this world. Anyway, the Evanuris are apparently responsible for the Blight, the Old Gods, the Titans dying and subsequently the dwarves’ existence AND… Andraste! The Jesus/Joan of Arc allegory was apparently possessed by an elven god - Mythal - and secretly led the elven people to rebel against their masters. 

Couldn't have been the brutal conditions of slavery in Thedas. Nope. Gotta be the Evanuris. 

And there’s only two of them in the game - Ghilan’nain and Elger’nan. And Mythal who they murdurlated and is kinda dead now but still possessing Morrigan (don’t worry! It’s good possession because there was consent!) 

Plus, Solas who isn’t really Evanuris but is implied to have been ‘close’ with Mythal and the game crassly tells you they were ‘doing it’ through Taash’s mouth. Anyway, Solas woke up from Uthenera and chose violence which is why we’re now in hot water. But that still only amounts to 3.5 Evanuris? I guess the devs ran out of time because there’s all these statues of Elven gods around. Should be 9 in total. 7 according to the statues.

Hm.

It seems Bioware tried to do Endgame but only 3.5 Avengers showed up and not even the good ones.

Wait, I’m forgetting the Forgotten Ones!

Ironic. Yeah, the Evanuris did a war on these other elves that are even more evil than them and they all got banished to the Abyss? We only see one of the Forgotten ones - Anaris - and kill him immediately because he’s trying to make elves into Demons for 'reasons'. And we tell Mythal we killed him and she says, ‘oh shit. I hate that dude. Respect. Here, have a piece of my soul, homie.’ 

A measured response.

Also, Ghilly and Elger’bum love the Blight. You know, the nasty magic zombie virus that makes you puke black blood and your eyes turn red and weird necrotic flesh grows out of your body. They think it’s beautiful! Can’t get enough. And like all toxic white people with too much power and plastic surgery, the Evanuris decided to share this gift with everyone, whether they like it or not.

I’m not gonna lie, I think Ghilan’nain has one of the coolest character designs I’ve ever seen. I love how she moves like a squid and slaps dragons together to create better monsters. Conceptually? 10/10. Artists, you did so so good on this. I love you long time, mwah. But the writing? Hnnnnnn….

If you were going to do this whole ‘Elven Gods = Evil’ thing, you really needed to make it feel epic and grandiose. It’s a big reveal to DA fans who’ve been sucking on the teet of ‘Elven Gods = Good’ lore of the previous games. We already got a bit of a slap in the face (literally) when Solas removed the Vallaslin because it was a ‘slave brand’ so it’s not a stretch to go: Elven Gods? Were a bit fucked up actually. That’s believable. But Evanuris did 9/11 is so… I can’t even with this.

Since DA1, we've heard stories of Ghilan’nain - Andruil’s chosen - the woman who was so devoted to animals she stood up to a hunter and was mutilated for her troubles. She was turned into a white Halla by Andruil and elevated to the status of goddess for her devotion. The Dalish pray to Ghilan’nain when they travel to find their way faster. In Veilguard, we see only the ugly squid abomination she’s become when corrupted by the Blight. It makes it easy to hate her. To accept a black and white narrative of 'Bad Guy bad' when they’re right in front of you. Especially if this is your first Dragon Age game.

The only companion that comments on the cognitive dissonance is Bellara and she becomes an allegory for white guilt. 'Oh no, our gods were evil and now they're doing all this evil stuff! However can I - a manic pixie dream girl - ever come to grips with this concept? Good thing the Elven Gods are carrying the plague so I don't have to think about joining them!' And this attitude ultimately culminates in her decision to erase the Archive that records her people's entire history??? Tell me you're a neocon without telling me you're a neocon. Yikes.

There are ways to give these narrative decisions meaning without immediately dumping the weight of the world on one companion's shoulders! And it's not having the Veil Jumpers say 'Oh shit!' every time you say Elger'nan. Davrin doesn't even seen to care since it's the Blight and he's a Grey Warden before he's a Dalish elf apparently.

Like, we hear Davrin tell the tale of Andruil the Huntress and by the end of the conversation with the team, he just calmly accepts the fact that she may have discovered and spread the Blight to Thedas. Stone-faced. As he carves an action figure out of wood. Where is the emotion, Dav? Where is the devastation? Or denial? Disbelief? Betrayal? Why are we all like, 'yeah, Solas is Fen'Harel, what about it?'

I want you to be as devastated about this as I am. And I’m Some Asshole from the real world. If you have a tattoo on your face because you thought Joan of Arc was cool, and it turns out Joan enslaved her own people and created a super plague she used to make monsters out of your friends’ meat, you would feel a way about it!!!

The dialogue and emotions of the characters feel so wooden and unbelievable. Like they're not inhabiting Thedas but your own little world in the middle of nowhere where none of this is real.

And they feel so out of time. Mostly because Veilguard is almost exclusively written in modern Simple English but sometimes the characters will say something that sounds like it belongs in an after school special. Like something a government employee responsible for writing mental health mandates imagines a person that’s been to therapy might sound like. Like if you googled how to talk to someone having trouble with their mental health and went to wikihow, especially in companion interactions, you would get Veilguard dialogue. This makes most of the conversations feel jarring and inauthentic and combined with a thick US accent that feels straight out of Hollywood, you get cutscenes that feel like you’re watching the CW.

Just as an exercise, count how many times this dialogue shows up:

“Are you alright?” / “Are you okay?” / “Everything okay?”

**Character turns away dramatically**

“I’m fine.” / “It's fine.” / “I'll be alright.”

Funnily enough, this is not how people are supposed to sound in the high fantasy world of Dragon Age. At least not according to three AAA titles, not to mention all the books, TTRPGs, anime and even comics in the Dragon Age universe, since the different regions of Thedas are roughly based on real life places. Like Orlais is DA France/the Vatican, Ferelden is Anglo-Saxon England, the Tevinter Imperium - Roman Empire, Antiva - Italy/Spain, the Anderfels - Germany/Eastern Europe, Par Vollen - Ottoman Empire, Rivain - Moorish Spain, Nevarra - Prussia/Hungary/the spooky part of Romania.

Not to be the person that says you need fake accents and racism in your RPG game but you're telling me you got MATTHEW MERCER - the king of role playing games - Dungeon Master extraordinaire - and you couldn't get half a Europe's worth of accents out of him? You paid him to hiss into a microphone and make monosyllabic skeleton sounds for Manfred? ( I love him btw) Way to make use of those seasoned VA chops! I'm glad the Viper had such riveting dialogue as “Did we win?“ that I didn't even recognise him as Mercer until the final battle.

Like... the whole appeal of Dragon Age was exploring a world like Tolkien's Lord of the Rings but different and new. Part of that was the buy in - the immersion - role playing. Much like in Dungeons and Dragons which can take place exclusively in the mind’s eye through oral storytelling, sometimes a voice or an archaic choice of words, a turn of phrase, or an accent, can bring a character to life and give them the complexity of time and place and personal beliefs, fleshing them out in three dimensions and adding some texture to the world. 

Veilguard is capable of this! 

Think of Antoine and Evka from the Grey Wardens. You can tell Antoine is from Orlais and Evka is from Orzammar just by their voices, speech patterns and accents. You know Evka is casteless by the brand on her face which means she had it rough in the dwarven city. She had very few options and becoming a Grey Warden, though difficult, may have been an improvement on her life quality.

Same with Antoine. An elf in Orlais is a second class citizen, a servant or a slave. No Vallaslin means he’s not Dalish. The Grey Wardens were probably a better path for him. This is good character design and execution. We only need to hear a few sentences from Antoine and Evka to buy in. They belong in Thedas. But why are they the exception?

Why are most of the characters in Veilguard two dimensional at best? If you look at the VAs on the cast, it's absolutely not a question of talent. It's the writing and direction that makes Veilguard's dialogue such a let down. Not only is it oversimplified and modern, it sounds like they used the first take on most of these lines! And the first draft on all of these stories.

I mean, this is Dragon Age! Think Lords of the Rings! Think of a world with different languages for elves and dwarves and even words for things in English. In previous games, you learned them organically as they came up in conversation or codex entries. You learned who came from where based on how people spoke. No one was breaking character and saying things like 'what's up?' or 'okay' or 'wow' or 'I would kill for coffee' or 'non-binary'. 

These are incredibly modern terms and phrases, and you are supposedly living in the Middle Ages inside an ancient bastion of magic. It’s not Hi, it’s Greetings. It’s not God, it’s the Maker. It’s not sir, it’s ser (gender neutral). We completely lose Ser in Veilguard because they bring in Ma'am halfway through!

To be clear, there are in-world examples of non-binary characters and identities and Veilguard even uses 'aqun-athlok' - the Qunari term for someone that doesn't identify with the gender assigned at their birth. But they do this in the most condescending USAmerican way of like, 'oh, the Native Americans call it ‘two-spirit’ - 'The Qunari call these people aqun-athlok'.

It feels disingenuous, inauthentic and just plain uncomfortable to be there. Again, we are being told instead of shown, which is Veilguard's cardinal sin. What would have been cool is if Taash went on a journey to discover other aqun-athlok or the Rivaini equivalent, and Rook could accompany them to learn more about it. 

Instead, Neve suggests that Taash go to Minrathous??? The city Dorian Pavus famously fled because his homophobic father tried to use blood magic to make him straight? Really, Neve? That's the bastion of queer acceptance you want to recommend to someone as raw and inexperienced as Taash? An underground organisation based in a racist city of people still at war with the Qunari Antaam???

And we don't even get to go with them!

It all happens off screen, even if you’re a Shadow Dragon. I would kill to do something in Minrathous other than chasing Venatori around stinky old Dock Town. Why do I have to go to the same bloody tavern with Neve three times but there's no non-binary NPC I could talk to in there?!

You get the nasty Governor Ivenci in Treviso that negs you every time you pass them in the Grande Market. The only decent NB NPC I found outside of Taash is a healer named Flynn in the village of Lavendel in the Anderfels. Evka sends you on a quest to find their mentor in the alps and later, you find out that Flynn was sick with Blight and got healed by secretly becoming a Grey Warden. This was done by Evka who allowed Flynn to return to their work - healing the villagers - instead of immediately getting conscripted to fight Darkspawn as a Grey Warden normally would.

What a cool idea! Using the Grey Warden ritual (blood magic) to save someone from the Blight, albeit for a short time, but doing it in secret because you know the Grey Wardens have strict rules about this. What an act of compassion on Evka's part that speaks to her personality. And what a reflection on Flynn that they stayed in Lavendel instead of running away once they were cured.

But you never find out what the Ander term for 'non-binary' is. We don't find out what the reaction to this kind of person is in that society is, positive or negative. Instead, Flynn hand-waves it all with a throwaway line - 'my mentor helped me with my non-binary stuff'. 

STUFF? 

ARE YOU KIDDING ME? 

Your entire gender identity and the consequences of it is just... STUFF??

The amount of times this game uses the word 'stuff', particularly in the second half, absolutely kills immersion dead.

Which brings us to the next cardinal sin of Veilguard - it doesn't take itself seriously.

Everything is just 'stuff'. The main quest? To kill the Elven Gods you unleashed? The super Blight that's ravaging the South? That's all funny and we can make jokes about it like we’re sarcastic purple Hawke. Haha. And you know what, let's just put it all on hold and go take care of our own personal business first. I'm sure coffee is more important than Treviso being overrun by Antaam and darkspawn and plague.

At one point, the main story quest is to 'check in' with the broody assassin and the grumpy grey warden because they had a disagreement during a meeting. Not for any Elven God apocalypse business, but simply to see how they're doing and talk about their personal problems like you’re the HR rep at Godkillers Incorporated. You’re not here to help raise an army using the connections of their respective factions, but to further their personal vendettas and chase after targets that won't matter if the whole world is Blighted.

At one point, you get back from Weisshaupt, having defeated two dragons and a cool darkspawn hydra monster. You kill an archdemon and make an Elven God bleed, for Maker’s sake! And Neve has the fucking nuts to say 'There's trouble in Dock Town.' 

BINCH! 

There's not gonna be a Dock Town if we don't take care of this APOCALYPSE! 

This rubbed me so bad I had to stop playing and begin this rant.

I thought it couldn't get any worse but then I went on Harding's quest to find Valta, and wouldn't you know it…

You enter Kal-Sharok, fabled dwarven city beneath the ground that was sealed centuries ago to protect against the Blight, the people inside entombed alive. Or so we thought. A recent expedition into the Deep Roads led to a shocking discovery - some of them survived!

And we meet at the tall imposing gates of the city carved into a mountain. As you follow a dwarf called Stalgard through the vast chambers inside, he tells you that the inhabitants took in some of the Blight to survive the Darkspawn incursion, becoming like the Grey Wardens.

(Let’s just ignore that the ritual kills most people and makes 99.99% of the rest sterile and gives you 20-30 years until you turn into a darkspawn yourself, so it's impossible for any of them to have survived since dwarves already have a very low fertility rate. AHEM.)

You enter the deepest chamber of Kal-Sharok. A sacred place in the stone. Lyrium - the font of magic - grows from the walls and wraps around them like veins.

(Even though physical contact with raw lyrium ore will cause serious injury and psychological damage for humans, elves, and Qunari, and any contact with the unrefined substance will kill a mage outright. But we just walk on in.)

You approach the statue of a great dwarven warrior and miracle of miracles, it glows and speaks to you in the voice of the Oracle. She tells your companion, Harding, of the Titans and their song and warns of danger - something awakening. And what does Harding do upon receiving these words of wisdom?

She throws a tantrum like a five year old. And the stoic dwarf named Stalgard actually breaks character and says, “She does that. Riddles, riddles, riddles. Oh, I'm a rock.”

It was so cringe I had to walk away from my PC and go for a run.

I know the writers were trying to be funny. But there's a way to be funny in character and in-universe. Remember Shale? Remember the unbreakable pigeon? If you can't do that, then maybe don't do Stalgard? Because it stinks of Marvel Cinematic Universe screenwriting where they stop to point out how lame superheroes are despite being a franchise that revolves entirely around superheroes.

If you don't like Dragon Age and high fantasy, then don't write Dragon Age and high fantasy. Don't take jobs where you're expected to write Tolkien when the best you can do is Madame Web. Or, if the lead writer/director is the one spearheading this change, then I think we have bigger problems.

It's clear that the demographic the writers are appealing to is vastly different to the original and even Dragon Age: Inquisition. Veilguard is trying to tell this highly sanitized PC story that’s inclusive of newer younger players who don't know the lore, and probably don't care. They're here to play dress up, get their pronouns sorted and make their Rook kiss an NPC. All fine goals! The problem is - the world doesn’t react to your being there. You get a surface level aesthetic facade of choice and the exact same playthrough as everyone else. Because you can't write a perfect 'uwu all my friends live in a lighthouse' AU in the nuanced morally grey world of Thedas without drawing a curtain over the established setting, lore and characters. 

It's incredibly obvious to a long-time fan that you’re covering up the controversial and problematic parts of Thedas to make sure no one gets offended while playing. Veilguard appeals to the delicate sensibilities of a purity police poisoned populace and needs deliver a highly polished centrist narrative with no bite and nothing to say other than SLAVERY BAD. It won’t even give you the choice to disagree! None of the dialogue options let you flat out object to what's being said, disrupt the conversation, or start a fight.

It’s incredibly jarring when compared with past games which offered a broad range of moral choices, regardless of the player’s personal ethics, sometimes with disastrous consequences but the freedom to role play as you saw fit. And it challenged you to think about your decisions whether they were good or bad, whether the ends justified the means.

Dragon Age has always been about grey morality. It’s not even subtle about it. They’re called the Grey Wardens for a reason. It’s about making the hard choices where there are no easy answers. It's about making sure the Blight and every other disaster is stopped. It's about making sacrifices for the greater good. About being the only person there at the time. It’s about the love that was there but it didn’t magically save everyone. It’s about hindsight and finding out information after you've made a difficult decision, then going back and replaying the game because of regret or because you want to see what would happen if you’d known. It’s about having the option to do something terrible and clicking it just to see what happens. It’s about the game getting harder or easier based on how much of a jerk/edgelord you are and whether you can live with your sins despite this being a videogame. Because that’s what this is - a safe space to explore morality without real world consequence.

We see brief attempts to replicate that in Veilguard. Like with Minrathous vs Treviso. It's a big decision the game forces you to make waaay too early in the story to make it meaningful. You choose which city gets your direct intervention against a blighted dragon attack. 

Your choices are: the racist mage city or, the city home to a bunch of assassins with no standing army that’s already under occupation and is heavily implied to be in far more dire straits.

Unless you’re from Minrathous, you’re highly incentivised to help Treviso. And the game almost assumes you will. Because if you pick Treviso, the Shadow Dragon hideout in Minrathous is completely destroyed, the environment changed and individual members are publicly killed and hung on the streets. The Viper is infected with the blight and the Venatori storm the Archon's Palace and take over the city.

Meanwhile, if you pick Minrathous, the Cantori Diamond in Treviso remains standing. You lose a few people in it to the blight but this is so early in the game that you may not even know these people yet. Some turn into darkspawn and the game expects you to care about them but if you were assuming that the urgent story quest was urgent, you were mistaken. The game waggles its finger and points at all the side quests you didnt do by making you make this decision and locking off anything you were planning to do. This big big choice happens at the end of a recruitment mission for Davrin so you either have to lose all your progress and go back or live with the game's stupid pacing decisions.

Meanwhile, you don’t control ANYTHING that’s happening in the South. 

Morrigan invites you to meet the Inquisitor at a tavern in Minrathous and tells you that most of the South is under siege by Darkspawn.

ARE YOU SHITTING ME?

Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain have restricted their activities to the North but deployed their forces to the South????? And the Inquisitor wearing my Shadow Dragon pyjamas is the only thing holding back the Blight??? 

What the actual fuck? or as Rook says more politely, “If the South is in such turmoil then why did you come up here just to talk?”

Darkspawn have cut through the center of Orlais???? Val Royeaux and Halamshiral are barely holding out??? Denerim is lost????? They’re holding the line at Redcliffe with help from Orzammar??? 

I am losing my mind.

The Free Marches have the worst of it??? Acting Viscount Aveline Vallen??? has led an evacuation of Kirkwall???? She’s taking her people and what’s left of her army to help Prince Vael keep Starkhaven???

Why would she ever help Sebastian keep Starkhaven??

Doesn’t matter. Because according to the Inquisitor, The South is the Inquisitor’s problem! Rook has to stop the Gods and the Inquisitor deals with the Blight. Oh, and here's a cool statuette that reminds me of Solas :)

Okay, putting aside the way they rattled off a bunch of names for the fans and immediately said all your faves are screwed. Why is the Blight down in the South if the Elven Gods awakened in the North? They make the Red Lyrium dagger in the North. Elgar’nan’s Archdemon and Ghilan'nain's rises in the North. Elgar'nan takes Minrathous - in the North.

Maybe if the other seven Evanuris were awakened simultaneously and attacked the South, I would believe it. Is that what the Dread Wolf was gonna be about? Did they scrap the game where the Evanuris were all attacking Thedas at once? 

Or is this an intentional move by the writers to wipe the slate clean for future games? Can’t have any problematic old lore and beloved characters getting in the way of our nothingburger of a story, now can we? Let’s just destroy it all so we don’t have to think about it… and neither do our players.

>:(

I’m so mad. 

And while the South burns, Rook gets to make inconsequential decisions until the end of time.

Such as:

Fight the Venatori vs Smooth-talk the Barkeep

Both end with a cutscene that you don’t control and you get the information you need. 

Your methods are never addressed again.

Disagree with Varric vs Support Varric talking down Solas

Varric goes to talk down Solas anyway.

This is ‘remembered’ by the illusion of Varric in your head in one line of dialogue several minutes later.

It is never addressed again.

Neve vs Harding follow you into greater danger

One of them gets hurt during the debacle with Solas. They have a cosmetic scar for the rest of the game and never talk about it again. 

Save vs Kill the Mayor of D’Meta’s Crossing

This has no bearing on the story whatsoever. A one time approval bump and then never again do we see or hear from the piece of shit that sold out his whole village which are now Blighted puppets of the Evanuris. No one explains how he 'sold out' either, probably blood magic. That's always the excuse.

Punch the First Warden vs Reason with him at Weisshaupt

This is such a deus ex machina. Because if you choose to reason with him, you conveniently notice the blood dribbling out of his ear and make a Sherlock Holmes level assumption about the Calling. This is something Grey Wardens experience once enough time has passed since their Joining. It's basically the end of your life as you know it as you slowly transform into a Darkspawn. Grey Wardens walk into the Deep Roads when they hear the Calling but the First Warden has held on for longer than he should have and gotten a bit mixed up in the brain. You should not have knowledge of this unless you are a Grey Warden yourself so fuck whatever Background you pick, it doesn't matter. You say some rousing words about becoming the leader who defied a God and suddenly, the First Warden admits you were right and he wasn’t. Just a complete 180 and he's on your side.

THE RESULT IS THE SAME. He sends you to the dragon trap. 

If you punch the First Warden and knock him out, Evka stands up for you as next in command and sends you to… you guessed it - the dragon trap. No matter what, the First Warden goes to stab the Archdemon and gets pwned.

You see him later during Davrin’s personal quest, fully Blighted. He’s either sane and suffering or insane and profane. Either way, you can’t save him. All you can do is end his misery. And it’s so frustrating because he has dialogue! He tells you to look for a feather that belonged to Isseya's griffon, it's the only thing she stops to look at with emotion. But the game completely ignores this and doesn't give you an optional marker for it. It just says 'Confront Isseya'. And that's it!

Like… the illusion of choice is infuriating! 

None of your decisions have any meaning. There's no lasting consequences. You never lose a companion due to your pre-finale choices. You never lose a faction. Even if you pick the worst nastiest dialogue option on the wheel the whole way through, it doesn't matter. Rook will still says something affirmative and the game continues on its merry way, railroading you into the predetermined story. 

There's no way you're not reaching the end. And that’s the only place where you’ll be penalized for not taking Daisy for a walk. I mean, going to dinner with Taash’s mother. Did I mention that?

The game forces you to be there when Taash comes out to their mother as non-binary in your own kitchen and I cannot express how much I did not want to be present for that conversation. In my wildest nightmares, I would not dream of inviting my boss to a coming out dinner with my conservative mother in the office kitchen. 

Why in the Fade would I want to experience this awkwardness in game when I just met Taash and I'm not romancing them. And I’m technically their boss? This feels like the most basic and degrading representation of the queer experience. I’d expect something like this from Glee. And I’m forced to sit there and watch this trainwreck of a dialogue. The game will not give me the option to say NO, not as a friend and not as an employer. Forget evil playthrough, this is just plain setting boundaries. Why can’t Rook say NO?

When I picked up the cool fire breathing dragon-hunting non-binary qunari companion, I thought we would be getting someone along the lines of Krem and Iron Bull from Dragon Age Inquisition. I thought we would be hunting dragons or participating in fighting tournaments, and the non-binary stuff would maybe come up over drinks and maybe there'd be one non-combat mission where you go meet their crew and see how telling them goes. 

Instead, it's a 30/70 split between the cool stuff and the whiny cutscenes about not liking dresses and wrapping yourself up in weird bondage rope. Like, yeah, Taash. It is weird. Maybe don’t do it if it makes you feel uncomfortable. Especially when you’re in the Lighthouse and not living with your mom.

I get it, it's a ham-handed metaphor for being of both worlds but neither. Qunari and Rivaini, man and woman, yet neither, or both. But instead of starting at a place of questioning, we're introduced to Taash as a badass dragon hunter, who then very suddenly loses all sense of self and identity.

Rook: "So you've got no problem fighting other Qunari?" Taash: "I'm from Rivain. Not like I follow the Qun." Rook: "You've got the arm ropes." Taash: "Sure. I wear a lot of stuff. You don't get to tell me who I am."

Cool, right? And then again, immediately, Taash stands up to the Antaam poachers.

Taash: "Hey! I brought her down! She's mine by right!" Poacher, in Qunlat: "You are no warrior." Taash, in rough Qunlat: "You don't get to tell me who I am." - breathes fire and roasts him alive -

Badass. Again, asserting themself as whatever they wanna be. But then they turn around and ask you, a stranger, whether they should be more Qunari or Rivaini. You don't get a choice about the non-binary stuff. But the cultural stuff seems to be something you get to choose? Why? And why can't they be both? Tell me you've never met a multicultural person in your life. Newsflash: People have multiple parents. They can be raised in polar opposite ways simultaneously. Yet it's been distilled into a binary choice - Qunari or Rivaini. Which just smacks of hypocrisy after making the character non-binary.

And the whole coming out scene with the mother. I did it twice just to see what happens if you make Taash be more Qunari and Shathann accuses you of meddling so the Qunari can soften up Taash to the Qun and take her away. This woman is insufferable. Because if you romance Taash, she'll say you're a bad influence too. But hey, she comes around RIGHT BEFORE SHE DIES. That's all that's important, right?

The fact that none of this is optional once you talk to a companion really grinds my gears. I didn't know what they were gonna say when I walked up to them the first time. I saw a big exclamation mark over their icon and I thought it was important. Even when it's a little grey clock icon, they'll end up giving you a mission. I didn't know I was automatically going to get a quest whether I wanted to do it or not. 

And you can't leave or untrack a quest, so you just walk into the kitchen and boom! Now you’re having awkward dinner with Taash and her conservative mother. And after she gets up and leaves the table you have to reassure Taash about the whole situation? Like, why is that my job?

It feels like Rook is everyone's lap dop, mother and personal therapist. Not only do the companions dump their emotional baggage and problems on you but Rook just readily accepts it like you're not literally fighting God at the same time there's an evil magic plague with dragons and shit devouring the world.

The only person who cares about Rook’s health is Emmrich, and Varric, but he’s dead. (Emmrich can also be undead)

Honestly, Varric’s death didn't bother me as much as everyone else. I never particularly liked him and getting stabbed in the heart with a Lyrium dagger seems pretty fatal to me. I was actually mad when he showed up alive in the infirmary minutes later. Like, way to cheapen the moment he got stabbed with an immediate cop out. And then at the end of the game you find out he actually DID die and Solas is just being a prick. And the game still asked you to sympathize with him despite all the shit he did.

I feel like multiple people wrote Solas and he comes off majorly polarized as a result. He flip flops between right and wrong, regret and conviction, all the way to the very end. And it’s clear they tried to make him the morally grey sigma male but he just ends up feeling stupid.

I never empathized with Solas. I tried romancing him in Inquisition to get more lore but it just doesn’t matter. He keeps doing more bad things to justify the bad things he’s already done, and Veilguard tries to make him sympathetic in the worst way. Your whole team gathers around the table to explain his Memories to you like you didn't just watch them. It feels so condescending, voyeuristic and unnecessary. Like a fanfic that couldn’t figure out how to make the big bad sympathetic so it threw in some flashbacks. And why? For the secret third ending, SssHhhh.

Mythal’s alive! Kinda. Her spirit was broken into lots of pieces and one of them can be yours for a limited time. But only if you watch all of Solas’s Funniest Home Videos. Morrigan shows up to explain that she also has a piece of Mythal and most of her memories but doesn’t help you do the thing. Thanks, babe. Glad you and your mom figured things out- wait. Didn’t we kill Flemeth before she could transfer- hold on, what’s the timeline for these memories? You talked to Flemeth-Mythal? 👉And agreed to accept the memories before you ran away and met the HoF? I thought- 👆you left- 👉and then we killed- 👈But she was back in DA2- 👉Solas took her powers in Inquisition???🤷‍♀️

What are you saying Morrigan? Are we retconning Dragon Age Origins? Also, where is your son?

I’m so confused. Glad this doesn’t matter. Like all of your decisions.

Morrigan comes and unlocks the third ending for you. It was hidden behind these brambles in the Crossroads you find at the start of the game. Imagine if Rook had a weedwacker and some Round Up. The game would be a fraction of its length. The Blight could be readily cured with pesticides. But as it is, you go through the secret hole and find a spot where a bit of Mythal’s spirit hangs out. She says she still helps by possessing humans like Andraste to guide her people.

Why humans though?

Not important. Nothing is important in this game. And none of your decisions matter. Don't look too closely. Don't analyse anythng or you'll miserable like me.

If you get the little Mythal statuette (because that’s how I would give you a piece of my soul) then Morrigan shows up at the end of the game, right before the final battle.

I almost had a heart attack.

Because I remember the end of Dragon Age Origins.

Morrigan comes to the Hero of Ferelden on the eve of battle and explains that she knows a ritual that can transfer the soul of an Archdemon to the foetus in her womb if she has sex with the Grey Warden that slays it. And you have to choose between:

slay the Archdemon and let its essence kill you

make someone else slay the Archdemon and get killed 

have sex with Morrigan before you kill the Archdemon to make an eldritch dragon God baby with her 

force Alistair or another Grey Warden to have sex with Morrigan and then kill the Archdemon to have the eldritch dragon God baby

Additionally, if Alistair is the future king of Ferelden, this baby may be the only way he gets an heir because fertility is so low among Grey Wardens. So you have to consider the power vacuum Alistair will leave behind when he dies childless, destabilizing Ferelden and leaving it weak and open to attacks from Orlais like his half-brother Cailin Theirin did. Discounting whether or not you romanced Alistair. 

You could also just get Anora to be Queen.

You see what I mean about complexity and nuance?

The fact that you could lose Alistair or Morrigan as a companion so close to the end of DA1 and your arch enemy could join the party instead?? Insane, both narratively and mechanically. And in DA2, you could just straight up sell your companion, Fenris, back into slavery if you wanted. It was genuinely fucked up. Your team lost its tank and you got a bunch of gold. But that freedom was incredible. We lost it a bit in Inquisition. Mages vs Templars was a no brainer. Who gets the throne of Orlais? I was rooting for toxic lesbians but I guess we got to pick the new pope? It all amounted to nothing, of course, because Veilguard chose to ignore everything you ever did. 

The only comparable decision it allows you to make is the choice of the new Archon: Dorian Pavus or Maevaris Tilani. 

Does it make a difference? 

Only to the single title card they play for you at the end of the game. And you don't get any epilogue. Did they succeed in changing Racism City? We'll never know.

I would argue the most morally grey decision you can make in Veilguard is whether your companion Emmrich becomes a Lich.

Now, if you've played any amount of Dungeons and Dragons, you'll know that a Lich is an evil wizard that killed someone, did a ritual and now they're an immortal skeleton person with glowy green/red light for eyes and cool powers. But don't worry! Veilguard has made becoming a Lich morally fine and good, actually 👍

See, you don't have to kill anyone. You just get your coworker to stab you dead and your boss does a quick ritual which strips your flesh, makes a phylactery and you're sorted. Immortal wizard skeleton lich powers are yours to command. It's more of a promotion, really. You just have to pass this arbitrary morality test that we administer. (Don't worry about it.) But you can't raise your already dead skeleton son back from the extra dead, even though you’re a necromancer. Otherwise, where will it end? *clutches my Lich Lord pearls*

Anyway, Professor Emmrich Volkarin, Necromancer, Death Mage and noted Fade expert, 55 years old, turns to you and says, 'Rook, you should decide whether I resurrect my beautiful skeleton son that's just begun to talk and is voiced by Matt Mercer, OR, if I should go through with my entire life's work, get that uber promotion at the funeral director's home and become a Lich Lord that potentially puppets the King of Nevarra. I will have no say in this and you can't let me make my own decision. I simply won't give you a dialogue option for it.'

And the game is like, what should he dooOOooo??? As though everyone in the new demographic isn't gonna pick 'stay human and resurrect Manfred'. I mean, he’s a heroic little skeleton boy and I love him dearly but this is clearly not up to me or you. Emmrich should be mature enough to make a decision on his own. 

There’s a lot more nuance to this whole thing that I wish was discussed but if you choose to save Manfred, that’s all Rook talks about - the value of Manfred’s undead life - his potential. Not the imminent death of Emmrich even though he believes he will become immortal as a lich. Not the loss of his senses or his humanity which he seems convinced will remain. And especially not the fact that once he’s a lich, he will have his phylactery stored in the Grand Necropolis. Myrna carries it out after the ceremony. Sure, this might be preferable to giving your phylactery to some templars or the chantry. But if Emmrich disagrees with the Lich Lords, he can be suppressed or even lose his free will and die anyway.

We don’t discuss the specifics of Emmrich’s condition past a few brief comments on how he has extra senses for spirits and the Fade. But he says it will be much harder to get killed as a Lich before the final battle so it means it’s still possible. He could become a Lich and still die. And for a guy terrified of death, it feels like a great moment of conflict. If you romance Emmrich, he tells you to stay behind so you won’t die and he won’t have to mourn you forever. There’s no way to reassure him because the dialogue wheel is an illusion of choice. You’re going to have a disagreement and spit back something insensitive like ‘I’m not going to be afraid of dying just because you are.’ Them’s just the breaks in Veilguard. All options lead to railroad.

Anyway, I think Emmrich's decision has the most nuance you get in Veilguard. Mostly by accident. There should have been a tonne more, of course, but at this point, beggars can't be choosers. If you pick Lich promotion, Emmrich turns into a skeleton man in a cool robe and a crown and then you have to have an awkward scene where he has to ‘come out’ to the party as a Lich. And Taash has to ruin it with their blunt insensitive dialogue. We can’t take anything seriously in this game. -sigh-

But Manfred is gone. Forever. It's not like he did anything in combat so I don't lose any firepower but I do miss him. Manfred isn't important to the story after his heroic final act so there's no political fallout but it does feel like you lost a member of the team.

The other companion decisions don’t hold as much weight because they lead to similar if not identical outcomes to their counterparts

Bellara keeps the archive spirit VS frees it (loses the knowledge)

This seems to me like a no-brainer. Freeing the archive spirit and losing all that knowledge to enforce blissful ignorance is a terrible choice. I guess it’s nice to have the option after going through so much of the game with barely any. But it seems out of character for Bellara to discard the thing she and Cyrian were searching for their entire lives, especially when he makes the ultimate sacrifice. You do a funeral walk and light the same braziers either way. The words Bellara says are different. She butchers the old elven stuff so it just makes you feel awkward. Again, I don't know why they're trying to make learning about your sketchy past the bad option but we know USAmericans are bit weird about the slavery.

Harding uses rage VS compassion to control the Titan’s Shade

This one has a secret third option. A romanced Rook that tries to kiss Harding gets yucky lyrium veins on their face and Harding harnesses the Titan power to remove them and save the horny Rook.

Otherwise, the three party members get together for a huddle and Harding gets control of the Titan’s Shade with rage or compassion. Either way, she keeps her earth bending powers. If it's compassion, you meet some dwarves in her next personal mission and she can share the Song of the Stone with them. If you choose rage, there's no one there. You just look out at the bones of a Titan from a snowcapped mountain.

The Griffons become Mounts for the Grey Wardens VS Guardians of Arlathan Forest

The game acts like you can restore the griffon population from a single clutch of eggs. This feels a bit weird since they’re all related but I guess beggars can’t be choosers. It’s six griffons. And I feel like you just saved them from the Blight, so sending them back to the Grey Wardens seems like a cruel and ironic fate. Couldn't you split them up, so that half go to the Wardens? In any case, they’re gonna get bred together. Assan will stay with Davrin either way, even if he sacrifices himself, Assan perishes with him.

Taash embraces her Qunari heritage or her Rivaini upbringing

This feels like a personal decision you shouldn’t be making for Taash. Sure, it’s an important step in them discovering who they are but like? I dunno what’s right for you, bud. And I feel like you can be multicultural? You can be both? Or neither? Or just take what feels good. Like, you had the right idea at the beginning when you and Rook went bird feeding.

I feel like Taash had their mom telling them what to do before, and after her death they expect Rook to tell them what to do. Either way, Taash will read the old tablet about (Adaari) firebreathers - they’re a rare genetic variant of Qunari that comes from having dragon’s blood. The tablet says they’ll be needed to fight the Devouring Storm (whatever that is).

Taash decides to help the Adaari and the Antaam because they don’t know how to live outside the Qun. They’ll seek to unify them for whatever comes next, either under the Qun and Qunari or with the Lords of Fortune. Same goal, different people. Again, why are you the one to choose?

Lucanis forgives VS condemns Illario’s betrayal

Illario doesn’t die or get killed either way. He just gets locked up if you condemn him. Lucanis is moody for a bit and becomes the First Talon anyway. If you forgive Illario, he just gets dragged away by Viago with a promise to ‘keep him out of trouble’. This mirrors Neve’s mission where Aelia just gets ‘taken away’. However, you still get the option, even if Treviso fell and Lucanis is hardened, and it’s weird that you make it for him. He talks about getting rid of Spite but we never see it happen in game. You only get the Fade/fake Ossuary run if you chose Treviso over Minrathous.

So, after 20+ hours at the minimum, we arrive at the finale. And if you did all the stupid side quests, from ‘have tea with a griffon’ to ‘murder a blood mage’, you should be ready to face the Big Bad. Again, you are railroaded into a suicide mission reminiscent of Mass Effect 2. I’m not saying it’s a rip off but it does feel oddly similar. Even the Darkspawn look like Husks from Mass Effect. However, doing your companion’s side mission would ensure they survived the finale in ME2. In Veilguard, no matter how many nug truffles you find, you will always lose at least one companion. 

After an entire game of meaningless choices, this seems kind of arbitrary and unwarranted but okay, sure. 

Harding or Davrin will die no matter what. 

Harding will naturally be romanced by Taash if Rook doesn’t get in there, so Taash will be devastated if Harding dies. Harding is also the only dwarf that can do magic? And hears the song of the Stone? And is connected to the Titans? Plus she is a rogue so I don’t see how she’s supposed to hold off a bunch of Antaam by herself.

Davrin is a Grey Warden and built like a brick shithouse. He has a pet griffin but there is a ticking clock looming over his life that ends with him leaving for the Deep Roads to die fighting Darkspawn or becoming one himself. A family and children is biologically unlikely to happen for him for Grey Warden reasons. If Rook doesn’t romance him, he remains a good boy griffin dad, alone.

It feels cheap and nasty but Grey Wardens are about sacrifice and Davrin keeps talking about how he should have died at Weisshaupt so it kind of makes sense for Davrin to give his life to slay Ghilan’nain but it feels bad after all he’s been through. And after all the bad guys you’ve spared in Veilguard, it sucks that you have to lose someone at this stage no matter what.

The next decision is

Neve or Bellara unlock the magic wards and open the door for the party to move forward

The consequence of this is that one of them is kidnapped by Elger’nan and used to pilot the Blight in Minrathous like an organic computer. This means whoever you choose will be infected and get nasty black veins and eyes with red irises. However, if you finish the game and seal the Blight in the Fade again, then whoever you pick gets a title card and is cured? As long as they have the Hero of the Veilguard badge like a pokemon, they will survive.

The final FINAL final battle(1).psd has some more choices that are so simple it's kind of insulting.

Three guesses who should go with the assassins to assassinate the enemy of the assassins? If you guessed Lucanis, you were right! Get a mage to help the Veil Jumpers do the magic things. And a warrior to fight the big evil statue/construct.

It’s like a shape puzzle for toddlers that rewards you with a cutscene. And if each of the assigned companions have a Hero of the Veilguard badge, they are guaranteed to succeed and live. Which just makes me feel bad for Dav/Harding.

The final decision you get to make in the game is what to do about Solas.

He’s tricked you into killing Elger’nan whose soul was the only thing left binding the Veil in place so in a roundabout way, Solas succeeds in tearing down the Veil like he planned from the beginning. 

You have 3 (maybe 4) choices.

Fight Solas, stab him with his dagger and bind his soul to the Veil to keep it in place. If you suck and all your friends died, then you get sucked into the Fade with him.

Trick Solas with a fake dagger Emmrich made (super unclear how/when/why you have this). Solas tries to use the fake and it backfires. You then stab him and bind his soul to the Veil, he gets yanked in like a yoyo.

IF you watched all of Solas' Funniest Home Videos and got the shard of Mythal, you can appeal to Solas’s better nature. Morrigan appears and channels Mythal who’s like- ‘Solas, you did everything I ever told you to do and it fucked you up. I’m sorry. You’re fired.’ And the Inquisitor appears to plead with him. If it’s a romanced Lavellan, they kiss and walk into the Fade.

Secret Ending. If you did the Mysterious Circle puzzles and got the Mythal Ending you too can experience blinding rage by getting the forbidden Executors cutscene

Whatever you choose, the sky closes up. The Blight is magically cured. In the end, what’s left of your party climbs down the beanstalk and gets a cheer and applause from about five NPCs and now we’re back to where this rant began.

The Illuminati.

I’m so glad we waited 15 years to be told it was all part of the Executors’ plan. And the REAL bad guys were across the sea and manipulating us all along.

What a satisfying ending /s

I hate it. 

I hate this game so fucking much because it could have been so good. And instead, it was bad and rushed.

Even the romances that were soooo hyped up by the writers turned out to be less than twenty minutes long and folded into regular dialogue. You have to have most of these conversations anyway, even if you’re not romancing the character. Go on. Look up how long each romance is on Youtube. 

Lucanis - 18 minutes of flat, bored, uninterested broody angsty responses and coffee talk while he makes googoo eyes at Neve

Emmrich - 18 minutes of true romance but hounded by ambient dialogue of cradle snatching from the party and an argument right before the final battle. It’s clear this romance got a lot more thought and care written in than the others. There's definitely more going on that just a confession of feelings, commitment to an exclusive relationship, and fade to black. Coffin sex? A pleasant surprise.

Davrin - 17 minutes of hunky grey warden booty with a heart of gold and a baby bird lion child. Perfect LI <3

Bellara - 18 minutes of shy awkward girl fumbling with words and eventually getting them out. Feels like Merill from DA2 but less complicated and deep. She’s definitely cute and someone’s type but very Disney princess romance 

Taash - 18 minutes of wooing a moody teenager with anger issues that realises they’re non-binary, loses their mom and finds out they have some crazy destiny but handles everything like a child. Everything has to be a dragon hunting metaphor. yikes

Neve - 16 minutes of Neve who’s great but you get most of the same scenes without the romance. You trade quips and banter like in a hard boiled detective novel and then it’s over. The fact that she can get hurt and kidnapped and her city can get destroyed adds a lot to this but it’s so little.

Harding - 14 MINUTES!!! Most of it is stuff that you have to talk about as part of her quest. You could have done so much more with the lyrium sting it gave Rook but they didn’t. 

To compare, Solas’s romance in Inquisition was around 17 minutes long if you don’t count all the dialogue you can have by just talking to him. You can’t do that in Veilguard because you can’t just walk up to a companion and talk to them. It has to be a cutscene with extremely limited lines, or it’s ambient dialogue that's dripfed to you every time you return to the lighthouse. If you count every single conversation you can have with your companions in Inquisition, then each romance is at least an hour long!

In Veilguard, you can’t even walk up to your LI and ask for a kiss! >:( 

I am so angry. I'm only going to play it five more times.

I need to know more about Elger'nan and Ghilan'nain. Why didn't we learn more about their origin story? About their plans? Why did they need the Blight when Elger'nan just showed up in Arlathan and all the Venatori were ready to bend the knee? They could have just walked up to Minrathous with Lusacan and Razikale and been met with uproarious cheers. And how did he move the moon? How did he just do an eclipse? How did that not drown the entire fucking world? Is Thedas flat earth?

Why the Titans? What happened? Why did they have magic? Was it different? Why did the spirits/elves want it? If the Evanuris were the first elves then are modern elves technically related? Can they all trace their lineage back to them? Where are the other Elven Gods? Are they sealed away forever now? We killed their archedemons so they must be mortal. And what is the Devouring Storm?

AAAAAAAA

If anyone needs me, I'll be in the angry dome.

[petalsonmoon]

one touch but you felt enough... you are in love.

(writing so i don’t think about the manga. for the wellness of my mental health. thank you for reading <3)

there's this thing shouto does

it's all too fresh. you can't even tell what you guys are.

shoto is a very sincere yet blank person. you can't read in his expression what he's feeling nor can you interpret his little actions. but if you ask him what he thinks about something he’ll express his opinion in the most clear and gentle way possible.

the course to what you both are now it's werdly cute. you noticed this little something he did because, well, who didn't notice the presence of shouto todoroki? he's the personification of kindness and quietude and tranquility. turns out these definitions created the most beautiful person you've ever seen.

and by noticing the details you noticed the overall and by doing that you two ended up getting closer and closer. you could rely on him to come to your dorm to tell you dinner was ready and be right there by your side during it and you would find him during his training or studing sessions to give him a water bottle. you would’ve thought that with a quirk like that he'd remember to drink it, right? he didn't.

you two would find easement in each others patience and honesty. it's actually being there for each other and not jumping any steps and boundaries that made you two unintentionally friends.

so on third year todoroki, being his straghforwardly serene person that he was, appeared in your dorm and cofessed to you how he had an affection for you for quite some time now, how much your time together was heightening to being the most comfortable he's been with someone and asked you if you wanted to stay by his side from now on.

those were his words. like, c'mon.

so you said yes. that you very much feel much calmer in his presence and would be absolutely happy to be by his side.

that was 2 weeks ago.

since then you noticed this little thing he did.

which is funny, to perceive a slight action from someone whose words were his main character.

and you wait for it to happen at least three times before saying anything.

right now you were in the communal space, sitting in the sofa while your remaining colleagues were still stretching after a 2 hour movie and chatting the plot away,

it was summer so the air conditioner was on. a few glasses with only ice could be found on the coffee table.

you were next to shoto, by his right, smuggled between him and furniture’s arm. you turn to look at him and gets irritated how his profile is so fucking powerful.

“do you like fantasy movies?” you whisper to him. he thinks about it for a moment.

“i like them” he replies, gazing down at his hands. “but they’re not my preference.”

“and what would that be?” you start fidgeting with your fingers, very slighly.

he takes a deep breath and squint his eyes for a second. he turns his eyes to you and you have to seriously fight your lungs to not hold it’s breath just because your heat leaped a beat.

“romcoms.” he says under his breath, expression clearly blank.

you pinched your lips trying not to let the chuckle escape. it makes sense, actually.

“can i ask why?”

“they’re very entertaning.” he comteplates softly “not too much going on but you can always have a great time and even a good laugh.”

he finishes his thought and looks away, satisfied. you can’t help but feel your body sink in fondness.

“that’s true. they’re always nice.” you reply.

“what about you?”

“my favorite genre?”

he nods and looks at you again.

“i would say...” you look down and think how you’d already know the answer. would he think less of you for being too different from his likes? “drama? with a bit of suspense in it?”

he nods in response and you don’t feel his eyes on your face anymore. you’re both looking at your hands.

“it makes sense.” he concludes after a moment and you look up at him, intrigued. “they’re always very interesting.”

tou let the little smile in your mouth win and checks around discretely, after seeing only a few people far in the kitchen you leave a gentle kiss on his shoulder.

the little smile also make an appearance on his face for a millisecond.

 “i also really like animation.” You say.

his eyebrows go up for a second. “yes, some of them are really impressive.”

“they have a way to make hugs so beautiful and comforting...” you let it out before even thinking. that’s just how comforting it was being with him.

“oh. the studio ghibli embraces, isn’t it?” he completes.

“yes! it’s really profound somehow and sometimes a hug like that is all you need.” you look away and shiver. it is hot but you did not go well with air conditioners. the temperature people tend to feel content at usually was the same one where you needed to be in a hoodie. but that was a unimportant fact that would die with you.

“hm” he replies “i think princess mononoke is my favorite one...”

“it makes sense.”

he turns to you once again, expressionless. “does it?”

“uhum.” you feel your body shivering again “it’s very humane and important...”

“what else?” he whisper.

“and emotional and romantic... it’s perfect, really.” you hold his gaze, already wanting to stay there forever.

and then he does it.

right when you conclude your description you feel his fingertips slowly touching yours with such tenderness and delicacy you’d almost miss it, if you didn’t also automatically felt your body warming up to the exact condition for you to feel perfectly comfortable.

“oh, shouto...” you let it espace, feeling like you could cry. you didn’t say a word about your issue but he noticed. he noticed you.

he interlocks your fingers and takes your knuckles to his mouth, placing a warm and short kiss there.

“it seems to me that it’s your favorite movie too.”

you move your free hand and position it in the back of his head, your fingers starts moving sweetly and he closes his eyes.

you take the opportunity to kiss him. he immediately responds and kisses you completely. his kiss is slow and patient and sure and you feel yourself melting in your feelings for him. your hand on his head makes sure to intensify the kiss and shoto lets a delicious and lovely sound escape his throat.

you pull back for a second. “i’m feeling a bit lightheaded.”

his eyebrowls furrowing and his eyes sparkling.

“like i’m in a romcom.”

[every-kuzu]

Please I beg you to do a character analysis on Kakuzu <3 from whichever part of him you'd like

okay. i’ve got a two hour car ride and a playlist to listen to - lets take a crack at this.

i’ve talked about this a little in response to another ask, so i’ll be bringing up stuff that i have touched on before, but first and foremost - kakuzu is a very guarded character. a lot of the time, you need to pause and really observe him, peel back the layers, which is something a lot of naruto fans don’t really do - probably because kishimoto didn’t spend a lot of time on him and hidan. hell, there are some things that even i didn’t notice until i started this blog and had to pause and observe him.

so. when you ask the average naruto fan about kakuzu, what’s the first thing they would think of? money, most likely. and his love for money is a big part of his character - but is it really the biggest? he says that the only thing you can have faith in is money, which i have no doubt is his actual philosophy, but he still backs away from asuma and his bounty (which it’s clearly been shown that he wants) when pain calls them back to ame. hidan complains and tries to bargain for more time, but kakuzu shuts him up and falls back immediately. this could’ve easily been a moment where he too tells pain that they need more time, but no.

because kakuzu is loyal. one could even be so bold as to call him loyal to a fault, especially in the past and even more especially given his past. that loyalty is what allowed takigakure to betray him in the past, yet he still shows pain that very same loyalty. he even tells hidan that the mission they were given by pain is absolute - another thing that is very unexpected, given his backstory.

so what does this tell us? that kakuzu believes in akatsuki's plans, or at the very least has a lot of respect for pain. (this plan being nagato's original, not any of the three-or-four-different-plans-in-a-trenchcoat-bullshit that showed up in the war arc.) now, kakuzu is also very obviously jaded from a long life in a world like naruto's, so i'd say it's up to interpretation how much faith he actually had in akatsuki, but do you really think he'd stay if he didn't see himself getting anything out of it in the end?

and that brings me very-much-not-seamlessly to my next point: he's not as uncaring as he acts, and this is best illustrated through his relationship with hidan.

now, when you look at their relationship, the general consensus would be that they hate each other. and once you look a little deeper, it seems like hidan cares more then kakuzu. according to some sources, he only joined the akatsuki because of kakuzu, and he openly shows concern for him in the fight versus team 10 + kakashi. but what's often overlooked here is that kakuzu does the same, and that's likely because you have to look even deeper to see it.

on the surface, kakuzu seems to be at the very least annoyed with hidan at all times. he berated him and talks down to him most of the time, and hidan retaliates. they seem to be at each other’s throats most of the time. but kakuzu has a lot of faith in hidan’s abilities. the minute hidan gets his curse on asuma, kakuzu’s thoughts are about how he’s 35 million ryo richer, which shows that he truly believed that hidan had it in the bag. the same goes for the fight with team 10 + kakashi - when they get separated, kakuzu openly expresses that he believes that hidan will kill shikamaru. he also shows concern for hidan, which is best shown, again, in the fight with team 10 + kakashi. kakuzu might not show it as openly as hidan does, but he does care about him. unfortunately, since we get to see so little of them, this is the best example i’ve got and we can only speculate how this care extended to the other members of the akatsuki.

which brings me to the next thing i want to touch upon - his anger and how it’s presented to us. or rather, not presented, because it’s an informed flaw.

the kakuzu we’re told about through other characters is apparently famous for entering a murderous rage every time something annoys him, but the kakuzu we’re shown doesn’t match this. the kakuzu we see is jaded, stoic, and grumpy, but he’s never mad. the most we get is him taking a single swipe at hidan after he griped about a bounty, but that was just in the anime. we know that he’s killed four former partners in this murderous rage of his, but he never shows a sign of being even close to snapping in the manga. and yet this “anger” is what most of the fandom chooses to cling to when it comes to him, which i think is because it’s something that can be observed from how other characters talk about him and not something that you need to observe from him. still, kakuzu’s murderous rage is an informed flaw, which i think is disconnected from how he’s presented to us, especially when we dig a little deeper.

in the end, i don’t really have a conclusion to all of this. it was mostly a way for me to point things out that most people might’ve not noticed. but in the end, this is just my personal interpretation of all these little things, and i’m not trying to claim that it’s the only correct one, but i’m just saying - i believe that there is more to him under the surface.

[justforalifetime]

Prompt by @urfriendlywriter - Waking up in their chest, their arms wrapped around you protectively. You just tilt your head and admire the curve of their lips, their lashes and their soft labored breaths as they seem to hold you like you're their most beloved treasure!

Summary- the bestfriends have finally confessed their love, and are waking up in bed after spending an intimate night together.

Characters- M (fmc, reader), P (mmc, reader's childhood bestfriend)

She couldn't remember the last time she had been this comfortable in bed. The last time she had slept so well. The last time she had woken up all cozy and wrapped up in someone's arms.

Actually, that hadn't happened yet. This was a first.

She was awake now, but all this still felt like a dream. They were sharing a bed. She was in his arms. He was hers. For now and forever.

She giggled at how she was literally lying on top of him, and her head resting on his chest made her heart soar. This was everything she had ever hoped for. Everything she had ever dreamed of.

And now it was time to wake up to a new life with him.

M wiggled around, trying to turn her head to look at P without falling off of him. His arms tightened in response and she blushed. He looked so serene, so at peace....as if now that he had her, he never wanted anything else. Never wanted to do anything but hold her and keep her to himself.

On the other hand, M wanted to do a lot of things. Like tracing the curve and arch of his lips, the strong line of jaw, the sharp nose framed by full, flushed cheeks. She would have done all this and so much more, if only she could move her arms!

That's right, she was hugged so tightly to his chest that her arms were leaden and bound at her sides. She groaned softly, trying just a little hard to wriggle and free herself from his hold, when she felt his arms flex and tighten again.

"P" she breathed in sharply, "You jerk! You're awake, aren't you?"

"Mhmhmhmhm" was his reply, and M rolled her eyes at his sleepy grin.

"Uh huh, I know you're awake. Time to get out of bed."

"Nuh uh," he countered, his voice deep and scratchy from sleep. M had heard this voice all through her teenage, had practically grown up with it. And still this time her heart fluttered in delight. He really was hers, wasn't he?

"Can't you spend a few more minutes admiring my charming face?" He asked, and M rolled her eyes before headbutting him in response. She had only managed to slightly nudge his chin when he suddenly rolled over, pinning her under his form.

All breath left M's lungs as she gasped. Caged in his arms like that, there was no where else M would rather be. Putting up a fight, however, was a must.

P descended on her slowly with half lidded eyes and M ducked her head, delaying the inevitable kiss that was bound to turn into a full blown hot as hell makeout session. P crashed into the soft pillow of the hotel bed instead, and M was too busy giggling to notice his arms snake up around her.

"Where," he said slowly, his voice deeper than before, "do you think you're going, Miss?" It was too late, he had her arms pinned above her head and there was nothing, nothing in the world that'd make her fight her way out of his hold this time.

M closed her eyes and moaned softly as P lowered himself over her, blanketing her but not crushing her. "N-nowhere", M stuttered out. Apparently that was the correct answer because in a flash his soft lips were on her neck, kissing and sucking and licking as a hot trail blazed her skin from head to toe. He attacked her neck and shoulders and the hollow of her throat till she was writhing under him, every cell in her body begging for more.

She was ready to demand a proper kiss when he stopped and froze over her. For a second she worried something was wrong, before she recognised the look on his face.

It was the same one she had worn minutes ago, when she had woken up.

It was the look of realization that she was his. Finally, finally they were together. She was his to love, his to adore, his to cherish.

He had been lost for so long, searching for the treasure that had been right beside him all along. Now he had the treasure, his treasure, right here in his arms, and she knew he'd spend his eternity at her altar, protecting her from the world, forever.

M took a chance, deciding to end the moment before either of them got swept in a wave of emotions. "Done admiring my charming face, Mister?" She teased him, still basking in the glow of his adoration. "Because in that case, there's something waiting for us."

P grinned and shook his head before letting her go. "Yeah, your first love? Food?" he rolled his eyes as he pressed a kiss to her nose. "Okay, let's go before the breakfast buffet runs out!"

[dira333]

Pretty Woman Part 2/18 -

Izuku Midoriya x Reader

Summary: Izuku Midoriya is at the top of his career. He's the Number 1 Hero, he shares an agency with his best friend Shouto Todoroki and the war lies behind them. But he cannot fight the loneliness or the demons of the past. Could you be the one he needs in this fight for his life?

Full length: 57k, Chapters are at about 3k length

SFW, angst to fluff, Reader is Quirkless, Haikyuu Characters as side Characters.

-.- Part 2 - 3,4k -.-

You regret not having brought your tiny purse. 

That way, you’d look like a functioning adult instead of an All Might Fangirl inviting Deku of all Heroes to an All Might Diner. You could only hope that he’d been honest when you asked if he had a problem with you ordering the Deku Milkshake. It has been your favorite ever since they put it on the menu years ago.

If that means the Fundraiser tomorrow is canceled, you’d have to live with that.

-

He’s pretty. 

You’d known that before in the way one knows that all Heroes seemed to be inherently beautiful. It seemed to be one of the things necessary for this profession, just as important as having a useful Quirk and a good head on your shoulders. 

But sitting in the booth with him made you aware of all the things no one had prepared you for.

How his hair is a shade of green you can only envy, the exact shade of green you love the most and rarely find, growing in thick messy curls you long to card your hands through. His eyes are of a similar color, warm and gentle as they move over you or anything else. He’s got more freckles than you can count even though you want to keep looking and his hand had been warm, strong, and gentle as he shook yours earlier. 

They’re covered in a web of scars as far as you can see, making you wonder just what he’d endured for them to look like this and still smile at you this softly.

Izuku opens his mouth to speak and is interrupted yet again by Futakuchi.

“One Deku Milkshake for the lady.” He places the dish in front of you before placing the significantly larger Dynamight Milkshake in front of Izuku. 

“The Dynamight Shake comes with sparklers.” Futakuchi explains. “I kinda have to set them off.” He doesn’t sound remotely sorry as he uses a lighter to do so. “Call me if you need anything.”

Behind the sparkling lights, you can see Izuku smiling fondly.

“Do you want me to take a picture?” You ask. “It’s not everyday you get that experience.”

He looks surprised, but pulls out his phone, presses his finger to it and slides it over to you.

Heat rolls through you as you pick it up, aware of the responsibility. 

Izuku’s smile is tense, almost forced, as he poses for the picture and you shake your head, fearing the sparklers will go out before you get a good picture.

“Don’t pose.” You tell him softly. “Forget I’m taking picture and just think of who that Shake reminds you off.”

The forced smile bleeds from his lips at your words and his eyes get a faraway look as he takes in the Shake, the sparklers reflecting in his green eyes.

His phone does a little sound when you press the button and his eyes flicker up to yours just as you press again, an emotion you can’t name lighting up his green eyes from the inside,  making them look like burning emeralds.

For a second, you forget to breathe, locked in on his face behind the phone, until the Sparklers snuff out with one last hiss.

You drop your eyes, too aware of your skin covering your bones or your heart pumping wildly in your chest, and push his phone back toward him.

“It’s a good picture.” You hear yourself say. You want to ask if he’d send it to you, but swallow those words before they can slip past your lips.

Instead, you push your own Shake toward him. “Have a sip?”

Futakuchi, the sly bastard, has put two straws in both Shakes and Izuku takes a sip, blush sitting high on his cheeks.

“It’s good.” He says, sounding surprised.

“Of course it does.” 

He pushes the Dynamight Shake toward you and you shake your head.

“I don’t like it.”

“How do you know that?”

“It’s spicy. I don’t like spicy.”

“But have you tried it?” He asks and you huff, picking the straw and sucking on it before he can ask further.

The taste, as you had predicted, makes you scrunch up your nose. It’s Chocolate and Chili, the spicelevel tampered down by the Milk but still hot enough for you to hate it the moment it enters your mouth.

“Yuck.” You sputter when you’ve swallowed it down and Izuku laughs, open and carefree, before pulling the Shake back and trying himself.

“It’s an acquired taste.” He says and grins as if he means something else.

“Well, now that that’s out of the way.” You huff playfully after you’ve washed the taste down with your own shake. “About… About tomorrow.”

“Yes.” Izuku sobers up quickly. “It’s a Fundraiser. There are a few every year for different causes. This one’s for the Crimson Riot Fund.”

“Oh.” You brighten up. “The Crimson Riot Fund? For Children in Need?”

“Yes. You know of it?”

“Of Course. I work in a daycare that’s directly connected to the Crimson Riot Home for Children.”

“You… do?” Izuku blinks in surprise before he gathers himself. “Of course you do. Tell me about that?”

“We’re talking about the fundraiser, remember?” You redirect him and he nods, an apologetic smile on his lips. 

“Of Course, sorry. My Agency usually donates a large sum anyway but it’s good for PR to attend. Last year I took my Mom but she and…” His eyes flicker to your handbag and back to your face, “My Stepdad hasn’t been doing so well lately and I think she’d rather stay home and watch than attend. Too many people and all that.”

You nod in understanding. 

“Are there going to be interviews? Friends that will ask questions?”

“Y-Yeah…” He rubs his neck awkwardly and takes a sip from his Shake. “There will be both.”

You sigh.

“I never… Well, I got a little introduction when I signed up and they explained that we’re not allowed to mention the service publicly. So we’ll have to come up with an excuse on how we met and why you took me to the Fundraiser.”

“We’re childhood friends.” You look up from your Shake, and blink at Izuku who seems surprised at his own words.

“Okay? Are your friends going to believe that?”

“We could have gone to different schools. You never went to U.A., right?”

“No. Well, if you think that’s a good enough excuse, we’ll go with that. We could say that we recently reconnected when I approached you about visiting one of the Crimson Riot Home’s. There are quite some heroes who do that, it wouldn’t be weird. I just… I’d rather not disclose where I work.”

He nods. “If they ask you for your name, just mention your first name. We’ll be as vague as possible about it and if your boss asks about it, tell him the same thing. I’d be happy to visit your daycare.”

You smile despite your nerves. “Okay. Walk me through the thing. When do I have to be ready?”

x

Eventually, Futakuchi steps up to your table to collect the emptied Shakes, clearing his throat pointedly.

“We’re uh… closing soon.” He points out, grinning when Izuku flushes immediately.

“Oh, is it that late already?” You say with one look at your watch. 

Futakuchi is back in a moment, check in hand.

Izuku pulls out his wallet without thinking, surprised when you freeze at the sight.

“I’m… You are…” You hiss and he blinks at you, acutely aware that Futakuchi is a little too curious right now.

“I got it.” He says and you stay silent as Izuku pays.

But you’re tense as you slip out of the booth to follow him to the door, barely wave at Futakuchi who’s yelling “Goodbye and see you soon.” after you.

“I…” You say when you’re outside. “You’re already paying me.”

Izuku freezes, doorhandle still in his hand. He forgot about that.

“How does that work?” He asks, to keep his mind from going haywire. It works only mildly.

“You have to confirm the booking after we’re done. We both have to put in how much time we actually spent together and if there are discrepancies we’ll have to come in for a meeting or something like that. After that, the money is transferred automatically, or so I was told.”

He pulls out his phone. “Do you want to go over the time now?”

“I… You don’t have to… It’s not…”

“But it is.” He disagrees. “I took quite a lot of your time this evening.”

“You don’t have to pay me for that.” You disagree, your voice tight. “You’re fun to talk to.”

Something hot coils tightly around his heart, making it hard to breathe.

“I…” He stutters, glaring down at his phone in the hopes it will keep his tears at bay. “But we should still confirm the time I booked you, right? Otherwise, it would… it would be weird.”

You’re quiet for a minute and even though he’s not looking up, he can feel your eyes on him.

“Fine.” You say. “But, just so you know, the money is going to something good. I’m not… I’m not using that money for something weird, I need it for my education.”

“You do? What do you need it for? Student loans?”

“No, I… Well, I work in a daycare but I want to take special Classes to work with dangerous or unknown Quirks. You know there are a lot of kids who don’t…” You clear your throat awkwardly and start anew. “There are still too many kids that accidentally hurt someone because no one knew how to handle their Quirk and if I can become someone to help, it’s one step in the right direction, right?”

His mouth runs dry as you look up at him, a determination in your eyes that’s soft yet strong, like iron clad in velvet. 

“Now I really want to give you a tip, just to get you through those Classes.” He tries to joke and you hit his bicep as if to swat away the offer. 

“Don’t. I’ll just donate it tomorrow.”

Izuku laughs at that. He needs to move away from the door, away from you, he knows. Has to bring his feet to move him home so that he can sleep and wake up and see you again. 

But at home, only Silence waits for him and you’re here, looking up at him with warm eyes and a smile that warms him from the inside.

“Let me walk you home.” He says and you don’t decline.

x

Your hair and makeup are done, your clothes are set out and you resolve to use the remaining time to clean up your apartment when there’s a knock on your door, followed by three low knocks and one louder one.

You open the door with a smile.

Takanobu grins up at you.

“Hi, Aunty.” He offers you a bowl of pudding. “Look what me and Grandma made!”

“Oh, that’s awesome. Is that for me?”

“Yes.” He nods and steps into your apartment, careful with the bowl as he puts it in between two towers of books on the table. “It’s Chocolate.” 

“That’s so nice of you. I will save it for later, though, because I’m going out to eat tonight.”

“Where?”

“It’s a fancy place. I’m sure they’ll only serve tiny portions so I’m happy you made this for me.”

Takanobu grins proudly, even more so when you dip a spoon into the pudding to try it. “Can’t help myself.” You chuckle and he nods.

 “It is good!” He declares, climbing up onto one of your chairs and swinging his short legs.

“Can you play with me?” He asks and you suppose that cleaning up can wait a little longer.

-

You’re in the middle of a game of Cards when there’s a knock on the door and you jump up to open it, surprised to see Izuku there.

His sight leaves you slightly out of breath, all decked out in a form-fitting suit, dark green tie picking up the shade of his hair that’s as messy as it was yesterday. You wonder if he tried to do something about it but failed or if he’s already given up on it.

“I’m… Oh god, am I late? I will.. I was…”

“Hi.” Takanobu pipes up from behind you. “I’m winning right now.”

“Oh.” Izuku smiles. “I’m sorry. I’m a bit early I think. You didn’t answer my text so I thought I’d knock. I’m sorry, continue with the game.

“Oh, uh… come in.” You take a look at the clock in the corner, realizing that he’s not early by any means, but perfectly on time. “Do you… do you want to finish the game? Do you know the rules?”

Izuku takes one look at the cards and nods. “I do. I play a lot with a friend of mine. Is that okay for you?”

Takanobu takes one look at him and sniffs. “It’s okay.” He declares finally and Izuku’s smile shoots straight to your knees.

“I’ll… I’ll be in the bathroom.” You rush out and stumble through the room, trying not to think too much about the mess it is in. 

-

“I win.” Takanobu declares when you step outside. “Aunty, I won.” 

“Amazing.” You move over to him and ruffle his hair. “We have to go now. Tell your grandma thank you for the pudding, right?”

“Will do.” He slips from the chair and waves at Izuku. “Good night.” 

“Good night.” Izuku stands up as well and you might be imagining it in the growing shadows of dusk, but he seems to be blushing again as he takes you in.

“I… I’m done. We can leave.” You mumble shyly, too aware of Izuku’s presence in your apartment, how it seems to shrink around him. “I…”

“You look beautiful.” Heat shoots straight to your face, cheeks burning under his gaze. You wish for your large handbag, for the soothing feel of the frayed straps under your fingertips. But you only have your tiny, sophisticated purse.

“You too.” You say, wishing for the ground to open up and swallow you the moment your mouth opens, but unable to close it again. “I mean you’re beautiful. I mean attractive. Not that you’re not beautiful, but I guess attractive is the better word? I guess it’s for men, I…” You stop, mouth still open, when one of his hands, big and warm and calloused, takes one of yours. 

“Let’s go.” He says, voice calm even though his face is so red you can barely see his freckles.

x

Izuku forgets about the Paparazzi every time until he needs to step out of the car and is reminded of them yet again.

Cameras flash in his face, and people scream his name, but he forces himself to stay calm and turn around, to offer you an arm to hold on to. When you do, he presses your hand slightly with his other, and pulls you up and toward him, lifting you out of the car with ease.

The noise picks up around him at the sight of you, clearly not his mother and he has to lean in for you to hear.

“Deep breaths. We don’t have to talk much. I know it’s a lot.”

You nod shakily, your grip on his arm tightening as he leads you toward the cameras.

He can’t tell you to smile, not with every eye on the two of you right now, so he puts his hand on yours again and squeezes it. You seem to understand, send him a shaky smile that doesn’t falter even as countless voices call for your name.

The trek up the stairs is slow. There are other heroes in front of the two of you who are being interviewed and it’s rude to rush.

He’s hyperaware of you, from the breaths you take to the tenseness of your shoulders.

Izuku can’t help but think about the two of you must look on the outside. Your dress is almost the same color as his hair, making you look like a forest nymph of some kind, an ethereal being that has simply stepped out of his dreams and into his reality.

In front of him, Sero grins widely, arm thrown over his girlfriend’s shoulder. Izuku remembers her. She seems okay with the attention, one tattoed arm slung around Sero’s waist as she leans into him. 

He wonders if you’d do that too, if his heart would be able to take that, if he could even get his arm out of your iron grip to put it around your shoulders like Sero has with his girlfriend.

“Did you say something?” You ask and he blushes, realizing that he’s started mumbling.

“I… Sorry.” You look up at him with curious eyes but don’t get to ask when instead, you’re urged to move further up the stairs.

“Ah, Deku!” A blond woman with very sharp teeth smiles at him. “So nice to see you tonight. And you’ve brought company.”

He flushes, can’t help it. “I… did.” He says, sounding just like the first time he’d been invited to an event.

“How lovely. Do you want to introduce yourself?”

“My name is Y/N.” You say, smiling sweetly instead of offering a last name.

Izuku blushes even darker. “We’re…” He‘s stuttering now, like the fool he is. 

“Can you believe it?” You say instead of him, laughing softly. “We’re childhood friends. Didn’t even know the Izu I knew as a kid had turned into a hero, let alone the Number one Hero Deku. Met him a few weeks ago over work. What a surprise that was.”

Your voice calms him down. He’s sure he’s still a little red in the face, but he manages to chuckle. 

“Had to ask her to come with me, of course.” He says, sending you a fond look. “She works with children after all.”

“How sweet. Oh, I’m swooning over the two of you. Childhood friends brought back together for this. I’ll let you move up the stairs for now, but I hope I’ll see more of you in the future.”

Izuku blushes again as you giggle shyly.

The other interviews are mostly the same, him blushing less and less the more he repeats their explanation.

But he still blushes every time they insinuate there being more between the two of you, can’t help the blood rushing to his face every time you look up at him through your lashes.

-

“Did we make it?” You whisper when you step out of the bright lights into a long hallway.

“The first part.” He answers and you drop your hand from his arm, shake your arms in front of you.

“I’m sorry.” You say. “I was holding onto you for dear life. Your arm must hurt.”

“Not at all.” He smiles. “Don’t think twice about it, it’ll be there for your support for the rest of the night if you need it.”

“Oi.” A voice calls out. “Izuku.”

He tenses involuntarily and you notice, he can tell.

A few steps ahead of them, Kacchan is waiting, red eyes glinting.

“Kacchan.” He greets him as calmly as ever, turning to you. “It’s Dynamight.” He explains. “We’re-” He stops, realizing his mistake a little too late. 

“We’re childhood friends.” He breathes out and watches you tense up next to him.

“Are you sitting with us?” Kacchan asks, eyeing you with interest. “Mom thought you’d bring Aunt Inko.”

“No, I… I brought a friend. Y/N.” He gestures toward you, aware of how hot his cheeks have turned yet again. “But if you want us to sit with you…”

“I don’t care.” Kacchan rolls his eyes. “Sit where you want. Mom just mentioned she’d seen you come in.”

Izuku wants to ask his friend why he’s suddenly so helpful toward his mom when a door to their right opens, and Masaru steps out, an apologetic smile on his face as he walks over toward Kacchan. 

“Sorry for the wait,” He says, smiles at Izuku when he recognises him. “Izuku, how have you been?”

“Mom’s waiting.” Kacchan interrupts gruffly and nods at Izuku. “I’ll see you two around.”

You stay quiet next to him until Kacchan and his father have turned around a corner before you step in front of him, eyes bright with intensity.

“A childhood friend?” You ask, voice tense. “Did you forget that he’s one as well?”

“No, I…” He starts before realizing he can’t get out of this. “Yes.” He admits with a sigh. 

“I guess I did.”

“How close are you guys? Did you ever do something he wasn’t involved in?”

“I don’t think he remembers most of our classmates.” You sigh and roll your shoulders.

“Fine.” You take his hand, surprising him with the touch. “I guess we’ll try our best, right?”

(Did Masaru ask his son to show him the toilets? Yes. Did Kacchan come with him like the nice son he is? Also yes.)

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[chairteeth]

Alina Gray Makes A Lot Of Sense

This is a quick one. Alina isn’t one of my focus characters but I do quite like her, and she is in the TouNemu orbit, so I feel like I should bring this to the table, since I still see a lot of people, even ones that call themselves her fans, who don’t really give Alina much thought beyond “she’s crazy” (which… guys I don’t think that’s a good mindset). Plus this perspective is rare to see. I will preface it by saying that I’m drawing from both psychology and personal experiences (my own and others’) for this. My thesis for this: among whatever other things that I’m sure she has, Alina comes off as having Antisocial Personality Disorder to me. Let me explain why.

Let’s start with this example. Both Alina and Ren attempted suicide (in the same way) and both attempts were thwarted by making a wish to Kyubey right before or during the fall. Ren’s every character motivation is tied back to what led her to that ledge and what impact it made on her life in that moment. Alina was completely unfazed by the experience, and only changed as a character because of 1. Karin's intervention after the fact, and 2. the discovery of witches, which she found beautiful and changed her motivation. Plus she almost seemed disappointed by the state of “death” and it’s not something she ever thinks about. That dismissiveness, her general uncaring attitude towards others and herself. Wouldn’t you know, that’s a symptom of ASPD. Not to mention the lack of empathy or guilt, at least most of the time.

Another important point is that Alina isn’t really malicious. She doesn’t think about her actions the way most people do. She’s said herself on multiple occasions that she simply does things, she simply creates things. That’s also a very ASPD mindset. Impulsiveness is another symptom of it, which lines up with Alina’s whims and urges driving her to do things, and the lack of traditional thought put into one’s actions is an ASPD experience I can attest to. Only someone actively in recovery or scheming would consciously put effort into thinking about their actions. The way it works in daily life, however, is extremely reminiscent of the way Alina acts. The only difference is that most people with ASPD tend to mask a bit more than Alina does.

The way she acts is uncomfortably familiar. It feels like looking into a mirror of what could have been, back when I was younger, less self-aware, and I’m sure most others with this disorder would agree. If Alina were older and started manifesting some of her more criminally-aligned urges, I doubt anyone would argue with me that she’d have police called on her. Her status as a genius in a way “protects” her from being viewed as dangerous. Geniuses are allowed to and expected to be eccentric, after all. Back to the impulsivity, certain symptom combinations like the ones Alina blatantly displays are so dangerous because the likelihood of ending up with an extensive criminal record is high to say the absolute least. Which combination? Ah well, one easy example is impulsivity and anhedonia. I’m sure everyone who has paid the slightest bit of attention to Alina is aware of how… easily bored, she seems. That’s not just her being easily bored, that’s another symptom, and it combined with the impulsivity is responsible for the aforementioned criminal record.

On a related note, and trust me I will come back to the topic of anhedonia in Alina, people often clock her as bipolar. She seems manic, very rarely depressed or introspective. That might be right, for all we know, but here are my two cents. The “numb” way she acts when she’s calm, down to her expressions, is textbook low masking ASPD behavior. Generally carefree, doesn’t assign much value to most things the average person would. Annoyed semi-often. In fact, Alina’s main emotion, the one we see the most, is anger. Which happens to be the primary emotion in people with ASPD, since it’s the least reduced one (I theorize this is because of what normally causes the disorder and the purpose of anger as an emotion). It even tends to be described as “explosive” which very much applies to Alina, Alina is either annoyed or explosively angry. Immensely ASPD of her, honestly. However, when she does become introspective, she becomes suicidal quickly, and while being told “your art holds ZERO purpose” is something to be upset by, it’s not “well time to end it all” levels of bad. That is reminiscent of practically every single person with ASPD I’ve ever met, personally, because it’s the one thing that holds Alina’s anhedonia at bay. The one thing that engages her mind, almost absorbing it. Her attitude towards it is extremely telling. She doesn’t care about the gravity of suicide, isn’t thinking about it, or dreading/fearing it or even doing the happy-before-attempting thing really, she’s just thinking about her art because she thinks she’s finally “solved” her problem.

Media often portrays things like what Alina does as evil machinations, manipulation and the like, but most of the time, the truth of the matter is that it’s being done with no thoughts head empty except for The One Thing (or the small handful of things) which holds your anhedonia at bay. Grand plans are also more entertaining. The ASPD way is either the most efficient possible path, or the most entertaining/least boring one. If possible, both. Anhedonia, or “boredom” as we often call it (especially before we know it has a name and that it’s not normal boredom), is often described by doctors as an inability to enjoy oneself and is also common in other disorders like depression. Boredom is poison to us, worse than death. There comes a point when you will do anything just to not be bored, you will do anything to yourself, others, or your environment, just for a chance of that feeling of anhedonia at least receding a little. Hence the behaviors like setting things on fire or animal cruelty often seen in teens and children with the disorder, because they’re following a random impulse and have no (or low) empathy to give them second thoughts. Zero guilt filter. It may work, it may not, but it’s something, an idea, and hopefully it’ll at least be distracting enough while you’re doing it. Anhedonia boredom begins with frustration. Irritability. Restlessness. Must Do Something Now Before It Gets Worse. None of the internal process shows on the face or body language. Sound familiar?

This is why Alina goes between some sort of ecstasy and then immediately frustration/anger or neutrality sometimes, and vice versa. Additionally, in terms of the anger, I’m unsure if this is related to a lack of object permanence, but as soon as the thing actively causing anger goes away, it fades. If it shows up again then the anger will be back. See also: Alina and Felicia. If something more interesting comes in, that will also divert attention most likely, unless you've gotten to the point of fury. The actual strong emotion is more like a spike. So for example, Alina might be really angry at the start of a battle, but unless something is continuously angering her and especially if she’s enjoying the battle (aka entertained), she’ll seemingly not be angry anymore. We see that happen several times.

Lastly, all of Alina’s behavior is just extremely easy to explain with ASPD (and comorbidities), but I should note that like all of the Cluster B disorders, people with ASPD can have a sort of exceptional connection. This one person that they like, that they think about. It can be quite dangerous, because most of the time it can become obsessive and they can easily become possessive over that person. The connection is not necessarily romantic, but the person with ASPD might mistake it as such if they’re on the side of the spectrum that cannot really feel most emotions. Alina’s behavior towards Mifuyu aligns with this a little (these connections can and do fade sometimes), and so does her behavior towards Karin, especially in Arc 2. Exhibit A: Alina will knock Karin out to keep her “safe” and carry her off.

This has been my opinion piece of armchair psychology on Alina Gray. And now back to my regularly scheduled TouNemu…