#the person I will become in less than 24 hours is between me and a god

[dark-elf-writes]

Literally vibrating because the vengeance saga livestream is TONIGHT and then after that it will be basically midnight which means DRAGON AGE and whjskdodndbhdjdndnsbd

Not one of you is going to hear me shut up tonight and I am so sorry

[ihaveforgortoomany]

The American Dream explored through Schneider (spoilers mainly for Chapters One and Two)

Back again with Great Gatsby parallels with Reverse 1999, this analysis is inspired by the parallels seen in Chapter Six between characters like Isolda, Kakania and Marcus to the characters in Tosca; as well as how the nature of tragic plays are explored in said chapter.

Anyways here is a exploration of Schneider through the lens of the "American Dream" because while I love oranges I kinda wanna explore Schneider as a character more outside of the romantic angle (thats still here ofc but more on her motivations and development) .

What is the American Dream?

(Im not American, just someone who/ studied the Great Gatsby)

In short this is the idea that in the "New World"/ America, anyone can do anything as long as you worked hard for it - Gatsby embodies this idealism.

This idealism is notably disillusioned by the end of the 1920s known as the Jazz Age - a period known for Hedonism, Prohibition and the belief that society had become less moral. The Great Gatsby and Tender is the Night by Scot Fitzgerald is born from this pessimism of the 1920s.

So how does this relate to Schneider?

Schneider

Putting aside her flirtatious manner and being a literal mafia boss, she is a character that was forced to grow up very fast and provide for her family at a very young age of 11. The male voice hammers home how Schneider had taken on the mantle of the breadwinner for the Greco family and how she will go to every length to help and care for them, such as turning to the Foundation and the Manus.

Now cue the oranges

The American Dream and the nature of it being a myth is expressed in the storybook scene between Vertin and Baby Schneider, specially when they share that final big orange. Im pretty sure this scene the game sets to auto as baby Schneider talks about the New World and how the "God loves the world there" intercut with Schneider suffering and pleading - just like Vertin's illusion that idealised is not real.

Baby Schneider talking about the New World with so much hope and joy being cut by the older Schneider, now jaded by the rejection of the Foundation and now the Manus reinforcing the pessimism of the 1920s that concludes with the 1929 Wall St Crash.

The American Dream is a myth, it has always been: Schneider was denied salvation on the basis that she was human, denied by the Foundation, denied by the Manus once they found out her lie and is finally taken by the Storm because she could not be on the Ark/ the suitcase would not protect her.

(I wonder when Schneider realised no matter the outcome she would be reversed alongside her family, maybe the moment she told her mother to starting moving once she realised Forget Me Not was not going to hold the end of his bargain.

I mean like everyone I would of liked a playable Schneider or even more on her as a character than the crumbs we got. But I think it is more fascinating how we Don't. Know. Schneider. At. All. Purposefully we are left wondering who she is as a person with only less than 24 hours of knowing her.

We don't even know her actual name but shes left enough of an impression to

One - Trigger Vertin's deep sated trauma of the Breakaway Incident/ giving false hope of salvation for to fail

Two - Create a fandom wide trauma for oranges and haunt the narrative that we actively call a depressing moment oranges

Less than 24 hours Schneider gave us enough to never forget her.

[littlejuicebox]

An Early Highharvestide Feast

(Soft Dom Astarion x Female Reader)

-----

Setting: 4 years after BG3, "good" ending, Unascended Astarion x F Reader Notes: Took a break from my WrenxAstarion fic to write this Thanksgiving-themed (kind of but not really... lol it just worked for the plot), one shot. This idea was playing in my head, and I had to get it out. Hope you all enjoy and have a happy Thanksgiving! This might end up being a Part 1 of a mini story. I'd like to do the fluff scene with all their friends around and imagine the lives they've lived. I love to see comments about what you liked in the story, it inspires me for other fics. Rating: Mature 18+ / smut Word Count: 2.5K

-----

You’re in the kitchen, flowers strewn about the marble countertop as you arrange the bouquets for tomorrow’s banquet. It’s been four years since you’ve seen everyone at the same time, and finally, finally, the old gang will be back together in one room in less than 24 hours. Your heart practically soared in anticipation... a Highharvestide banquet in your very own home, with your favorite people in the world. You wanted everything to be just perfect.

The planning had taken weeks. Astarion had left the menu to you, of course, apart from the wine and alcohol selection. He had taken that from you quite early on and it had been more than a tenday before he solidified his choices between his frequent business meetings and your political events. He’d focused heavily on guiding you both in politics and expanding your wealth the past few years, while you focused on gardening and improving Baldur's Gate... plus navigating the lack of anonymity in your life.

Admittedly, you’d stumbled clumsily through your change in status, from unknown woman to Lady Ancunin, while Astarion glided into the position like he’d simply left his post for a long vacation. You’d been happy to take the lead in the wilds while a tadpole was lodged in everyone's brains, but you were even happier to hand the reins to him once the city was safe. And you were always proud to tell your friends that he’d navigated the two of you through the changes quite well.

In fact, he'd just purchased a second property outside of Baldur’s Gate with aims to start your very own winery; his pet project that he loved quite dearly. It was beautiful to watch Astarion approach something with such passion and vigor. After becoming the heroes of Baldur’s Gate, it had pained you that he could no longer stand in the sun. Not as much as it so obviously pained him. His mask was carefully crafted, and yet you often saw right through it. You hoped that perhaps one of your friends would bring news of a cure for his condition to the feast.

He had always been adamant that he’d make the same choice over and over again, but guilt still stabbed you like a dagger to the gut when you saw him watch the sun rise from the deepest depths of your manor or caught him studying your tan lines from your many hours spent out in the garden, your own personal pet project, specializing primarily in night blooming plants.

Astarion’s voice pulls you from your reverie as he enters the kitchen with Scratch trailing behind him. His vermillion eyes are focused on a scroll in his hands as he grasps a bone from a jar and tosses it into the dog’s bed. Scratch obediently settles himself into the plush mattress, content to gnaw away at the treat.

“Darling, your dog went after the chickens again. One of the staff had to run him down and then give him a bath. We may want to seriously consider a trainer. Command beast works all well and good when you’re around, but not everyone has that skill set in their repertoire, dear.” His tone carries just the slightest tinge of annoyance; you two have had this conversation before. But you know in his heart of hearts that Astarion loves the blasted dog perhaps more than you do.

You glance at Scratch, currently focused on giving you his best look of feigned innocence. The look reminds you quite a bit of another white-haired miscreant standing in that very same kitchen and you chuckle. Distracted, you feel the miscalculated slip of your hand as you reach for a particularly thorned flower stem. The punishing sting causes you to wince and pull in a sharp intake of breath. Blood blooms in buds of red on your fingers and the scent catches Astarion’s attention immediately.

His eyes are alight as he chides you. “You really must stop bleeding everywhere, my heart. It’s distracting.” He places the scroll down and comes to your side, grasping your hand in his to examine the damage.

“Perhaps if you helped me with these arrangements like I’d asked, I wouldn’t be in this situation, my love.” You respond with a soft huff, but you extend your hand towards the vampire, already quite aware what his next move will be. He bends to lick the red droplets from your skin before he kisses the knuckle of your hand. Astarion will never waste such a precious thing, that much is certain.

“Perhaps if you more frequently used the staff -- that we pay quite well, might I add -- to do things like tend your garden, put all these flowers in vases, and perform any number of menial tasks, then you wouldn’t be in this situation.” The vampire retorts with a raised eyebrow. “All of this is below your station now. It truly pains me to see your beautiful hands doing such things, my dear.”

You smile as you close your eyes and whisper a healing incantation, sealing the superficial wounds with minimal effort. You swivel in your seat and turn to face your husband, eyebrow arched to mirror his own, voice slipping into a coy register. “And what, Lord Ancunin, would you rather see my hands doing?”

You won. You could see it in the darkening of his eyes as he placed his hands on either side of the counter and pressed forward to look at you, red eyes flitting between yours.

Astarion had ebbed and flowed in his sexual appetites, especially in the first few years of your union. He had been plagued by panic attacks and night terrors something awful; they still occurred but not with the same horrid frequency. Your many nights of herbal teas and "flower child" magic, as he so lovingly called it, eased the suffering. You’d been content to ride the waves of desire with him, and it seemed more recently, as the two of you adjusted to domestic life, his appetites had returned with force.

His face hovered just inches in front of yours, eyes alight with a combination of adoration and lust as he pressed a soft kiss to your lips before pulling back and running his eyes greedily down your body, cocking his head as he fantasized about any number of dirty things. “I have several delicious ideas for those hands, darling.”

The flowers were scattered on the ground, along with a broken vase in an instant. The vampire hoisted you up with relative ease before placing you onto the cool, marbled counter. His hands grazed up the side of your silken gown and then delved under the hem to explore your bare skin. He quickly found his way to the junction between your thighs and a pleased, rakish smile crossed his face.

“No underclothes, Lady Ancunin? You truly do desire to test my patience today.” His eyes locked with yours as he knelt in front of you, draping your legs over his shoulders and pushing your dress up to reveal you to him fully.

You would have to enlist the help of the staff tomorrow afternoon. The tradeoff was well worth it, you thought, as your silver-haired husband bowed his head before you to run his tongue against your slit, a little hum escaping him as he tasted your warmth. He ran his tongue up to your clit, his lazy, languid strokes pressing into you. Always such a tease.

“Astarion…” You murmur, bucking your hips toward the vampire as your hands found silver curls of hair and took hold.

A smile snaked its way across his lips as he continued his torment. You were wriggling, desperate for more, which the elf adamantly denied you, his hands gripping into your thighs as he brushed his feather light tongue against you once more. Just enough stimulation to keep your attention, but not enough to provide any relief.

“My love..” Your tone is practically begging for him to give you more.

“Mm, darling. I do believe I need to show you what else your hands could do, don’t I?” He grabs your hand and yanks it towards your sex, where he guides you to play with yourself. Hungry red eyes watch the show as arousal begins to drip from you onto the countertop. He slips two long fingers deep inside your cunt and curls them slightly, pumping the digits in and out, which earns him a delightful moan. Still on his knees, the vampire removes his fingers from inside your walls and licks your juices off his hand before sliding your legs off his shoulders and standing. He makes quick work of ripping your gown over your head, pressing gentle kisses against the newly freed flesh of your chest. You are now completely barren and exposed to your lover, his lustful eyes stoking the fire between your legs.

His own arousal is now clearly straining against his clothes. Astarion quickly undoes the buttons of his collar and lacings of his trousers, freeing his cock before your hungry gaze. You’re still playing with yourself as you watch the man completely undress before you.

“Now darling…” He murmurs in that sensual tone reserved only for you. He guides your unoccupied hand to the twitching length of his cock and wraps it around the shaft, giving a few experimental pumps into your hand. “What else can your beautiful hands do?”

You take the queue and begin moving your hand around his length. Astarion hisses in pleasure, rolling his hips as he fucks your hand. The vision is quite lewd; you're playing with your own pussy as you pump your lover’s cock in time, your respective arousals just inches from one another but not touching. It's enough to cause the heat in your cheeks and your sex to rise and illicit several excited keens from you. He teasingly moves his length closer to your entrance, pulling away just as the head of his member brushes against you. You want to scream every time he pulls away, the bastard lives to tease you to the edge of desire.

Astarion was watching the scene with rapt interest, absolutely transfixed. His breath was quickening as he pressed himself into your hand, watching the head of his penis sheath and unsheathe itself under your ministrations as your pussy prayed to be plunged into, leaking arousal all over the cold countertop. He was always more in control in these situations, able to keep a firm hold on his desire in a way you never could.

“Look at my little treat, making such a mess on these expensive counters.” He murmured in mock disappointment and mock condescension, eyes burning with excitement. “Play with yourself and show me the mess you make when you cum for me, my sweet.”

You moan, desperate to have him fill you. “Astarion, please. Fuck me already. Please.” You’re keening, fingers rubbing against your clit with vigor. Desperate for something to fill the ache inside you, you remove your hand from your lover’s cock and shove two fingers into your wetness. The stimulation is fantastic and rips a moan from your vocal cords as your head tilts back.

Astarion chuckles darkly at the scene before him. It was no secret that he loved the way you inflated his ego when you begged for him, a writhing mess of wanton desire for his eyes only. The do-good, stoic hero of Baldur’s Gate turned into a desperate, needy little minx under his touch. He never tired of it. “Cum for me, darling. And then you will get your reward.”

You aim to do as he says, using one hand to plunge in and out of yourself while the other rubs frantically at your clit. Your legs are spread wide, displaying everything to the vampire as you push yourself towards release. Finally, the bubble bursts and an orgasm crashes around you, sending waves of pleasure throughout your body and into your thobbing sex. The pulsing seems nearly endless, and you feel the ooze of your juices sliding between your legs as you ride the wave of pleasure. When you come to your senses and flutter your lids open, Astarion's eyes are boring into you with such desire that it causes a tremor of excitement to run down your spine.

In one swift move he has you in a new position. Your feet are on the floor, albeit legs a bit shaky, and your ass is turned toward your lover, body bent at the waist. Your face is pressed into the counter, into the stickiness of your own juices. Everything smells of sex.

A delicious groan escapes from the vampire as he presses the head of his cock into your entrance, ready to take you from behind. “Beautiful... now, let’s see if I am able to make you come undone once more.”

Astarion slams into you with vigor, the force of the movement knocking the wind out of you as he groans in appreciation. Your soaking wet sex offers no resistance and you gasp at the pleasure of the rapid intrusion. He repeatedly drags himself back at a tortuous, languid pace just to thrust himself balls-deep once more, snapping his hips into the flesh of your ass, moaning every time he takes you to the hilt.

“Oh gods!” You exclaim as he picks up the pace, pumping into you with increasing speed, his cock curving gratifyingly along your insides. You feel yourself clenching around him as his efforts push you toward another peak.

Astarion growls and grabs your hand, guiding it once again to your clit. You’re climbing up to a second release as he rolls his hips behind you in an unceasing onslaught.

“There you go, little love. Won’t you cum for me again?” He coaxes in a graveled whisper as his lips and tongue trail down your spine, never once ceasing his thrusts. The vampire’s teeth find a beautiful little spot at the meeting point of your shoulder and neck, and he bites down, just enough to draw blood. The sensation pushes you over the edge and you spasm around your lover, your cunt eagerly gripping at his length.

“Oh! Oh... oh, my love.” The vampire groans as your throbbing sex pushes him over the edge, his final pumps turning sloppy as he spills into you. The two of you are a mess of panting chests and tired limbs for a few moments before Astarion straightens himself up and gently pulls you from the counter, dotting kisses along your shoulder where he left the bite.

"That was wonderful." You whisper, turning to face the vampire as you plant a gentle kiss on his lips.

“Mmh.” Astarion agrees in a little hum as he looks down at you with soft and loving eyes, pushing strands of hair away from your face before holding your chin in his hand and planting another kiss on your lips. The slightest of smiles flits across his lips as he runs his hands down to the curve of your waist. You move to begin cleaning up the mess you two made when your lover grabs your hand and begins to tug you away from the kitchen.

"Now, now, darling. Leave that be. I haven't finished showing you what else your hands can do… and we only have a bit longer before our friends show and ruin all the fun. Seems my Highharvestide feast came a day early." He muses, before eagerly leading you to the bedroom you both share. The flowers would have to wait.

——-

Part 2: Happy Highharvestide Day (all fluff)

[reareaotaku]

I Don't Wanna Be Your Friend, I Wanna Kiss Your Lips

Summary: Ever since the incident where Mike patched you up, things have been different. You didn't know how to feel or what to say, but everyone around you can see that you two have changed Pairings: Yandere! [Aged Up!] Mike Wheeler x Fem! Reader Tw: Enemies to Lovers, Nicknames Pt 1: I Loathe You

Things were different now; You know, between you and Mike. You didn't know how to describe it, but it wasn't a bad feeling- but it wasn't a good feeling either. It was just... Well, weird, because you two had never gotten along. It was nice to not always be fighting though, especially at work.

"Hey, are you okay?"

You snapped out of it, looking up at Mike, who was looming over you, looking at you concerned. "Uh-Yeah- Yeah, I-uh yeah, I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You seem a little out of it."

"Yeah," You crossed your arms, avoiding eye contact with him, "Everything's fine."

"Your arm looks better." He reaches for your arm, lightly caressing the bandaged area. You pull back from him, which causes him to frown. He sighs, looking around the empty restaurant, before looking back at you. "Come on, let's close up and I'll drive you."

The drive was quiet... To quiet. You wanted to speak up, say something- anything, but the words couldn't leave your mouth. Everything you wanted to say stuck in your throat, practically burning your tongue, but it wouldn't come out. You looked over at him, but his eyes were focused on the dark road and that's when you realized he was heading in the wrong direction.

"Um, Mike, I'd hate to be a backseat driver, but I think you missed the turn to my house."

"We're not going to your house."

You frowned, looking around the car, before grabbing the door handle and looking at him a little confused, "What?"

He pulls to the side of the road and parks the car, before finally looking at you, "I just wanted to talk to you. You're acting weird."

"Weird? I'm not acting weird."

He frowns, turning in his seat, "I made fun of you when you dropped a person's drink and you just said 'Yeah, I should be more careful,' in a monotone voice."

"Monotone? That's a big word, huh?"

"See, like that. You said it in that voice. Did I do something wrong?"

"What?" You shake your head, "No- I mean, uh I don't know... This is weird, you know?"

"What's weird?"

Was he playing stupid? He completely took a 180 from how you used to act together in less than 24 hours. It was giving you whiplash. Maybe you were thinking about it too much? I mean why can't you two be friends? It just felt kind of rushed... You felt a stinging sensation on your arm and looked at the now bloody bandages. You grimaced, reaching for it smearing the blood on your fingers.

"Have you been changing your bandages?"

You look at Mike like he's grown a second head. He probably didn't seriously mean the question and it came out when seeing the blood. You tilt your head, before frowning, "No, Mike, I'm not. Why would I do that?"

"Sorry, it was a dumb question," He sighs while rolling his eyes. "Why is there blood though. Here, give me your arm." He doesn't give you a chance to even think about what he said as he pulls you towards him and slowly removes the bandages.

"Why are you taking the bandages off? You don't have new ones-"

"Actually-" He lets go of your arm, opening the glove box, and there was a wrapped bandage much to your surprise. "I do. Here," He grabs your arm back and finishes unraveling the bandage.

"Wow, I never expected you to be prepared."

"Well, when you're always getting attacked by monsters, you kind of have to become prepared for everything."

You were going to tell him he's changed, that he was different, but before the words could leave your mouth, there was a sharp pain in your arm.

"Your wound reopened."

"Oh, is that what happened?"

He glares up at you, before unraveling the new bandages. "It might have happened at work or something... You're lucky I had bandages."

"The luckiest." You sarcastically respond, which just causes him to groan.

He grips your hand and pulls you towards him. "I don't know why you're acting like this. I'm trying, like really trying. I want us to be friends and I don't want to fight with you anymore. Believe it or not, I do care about you... I just... uh, I guess I never realized it until recently. I wish you would stop trying to push me away."

"Well, it's going to take time to be friends. We've fought for so long."

He rubs his thumb against where he had gripped you, before looking towards his steering wheel, "Yeah.. Time. How can we be friends over time if you just push me away though?"

"I don't push you away." You try and justify, but you knew it was true. There was a part of you that was scared that he was just pretending to be nice, so that you'd let your guard down and he could make you into a big joke. "I just... How am I supposed to know you're not going to make me into some big joke."

"Oh yeah," He rolls his eyes, before pointing at himself, "I, the guy part of possible the biggest loser club in the world with a shirt that tells the world that, am going to embarrass YOU," He points to you, "A girl who has more friends than I've ever had. Even if I was, who would I embarrass you infront of? Everyone hates me-"

"Everyone doesn't hate you. They just think you're weird."

"Well," He turns in his seat, facing the wheel again, "Maybe I like being weird."

"Yeah, I've always liked that about you. You are unapologetically yourself."

You could see the small smile rise on his face and it made you smile to yourself.

He clicks his tongue, his eyes wandering the car, "You know... I've always liked your hair- and eyes." He quickly says, messing with his hands.

You tsk, chuckling under your breath, "I like your hair too, even if most people don't like mullets," You then reach around and grab his hand, "And your hands. God I love your hands, they're so pretty. And your legs. I like how long they are."

He laughs and you blush feeling slightly embarrassed.

"Man, take me home-"

"What, you don't want to tell me more about how much you like my body?"

"Not necessarily your body." You quickly back track and Mike makes a sound of offense. "I didn't mean it like that."

"Yeah? How did you mean it?"

"I don't know..." You laugh. "Now take me home, seriously. My dad's probably worried."

"Okay, Princess, whatever you want."

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

On the language debate, I personally headcanon that the main language spoken at NRC is a common one. (?) (Like how English is the business language, or like how generally Native Americans had a common language that they spoke when trading with other tribes.) And Crowley or the Mirror used magic so that You was temporary fluent in that language.

After the ceremony, Yuu has to learn the common language and picks it up really fast (as one would in such a situation). Therefore, Yuu can still speak it when away from NRC.

(I also headcanon English as an ancient language akin to Latin, because I heard that Arabic was canonically an ancient language.)

[Referencing this post!]

I’d buy that everyone at NRC speaks the common language to some level of proficiency; it’s like how international students typically need to speak the language of whichever country they hope to study in and need to prove their fluency in an exam beforehand. As I said in the original post, the light novel does mention a translation spell over the school, so maybe that’s part of the “magic” that helps Yuu to understand what the others are saying.

Now, it’s theoretically possible for Yuu to learn the common language of Twisted Wonderland in a year, but I don’t think immersion alone would cut it (especially since the main story is only up to like 2/4 to 3/4 of a year so far) . They’d probably have to put in significant effort outside of everyday conversations to pick up its rules (because remember that language isn’t just vocabulary but also grammar, syntax, and social conventions). Yuu would also need consistent feedback from people since that’s how one usually “fixes” their incorrect language use. It’s similar to how adults would correct a child learning their first language; ie a kid says “wadur” instead of “water”.)

One site I looked at suggested that, depending on the language categorization (I, II, III, of IV), it can take 24-92 weeks’ worth of time to become an “advanced” speaker. Realistically, just getting to the basic conversational level could be hundreds or thousands (700-2500+) of hours on its own—and Yuu has to do this on their own time between homework, going to classes, and managing all the issues that Crowley doesn’t 💀 To me, that doesn’t sound like a lot of free time. Counterpoint to my own point though, we also have to consider that Yuu is... well, technically Yuu can be any age you want, but most Yuus are implied or portrayed to be 16-18. The critical window for language acquisition is theorized to be anywhere from the first three years of life up to as late as 17-18 years. After this critical window, the ability for language development tapers off. So, thinking about that, Yuu's brain could still be very pliable and able to absorb new language (though they'd have to work quite intensely to pack in as much as they can before this ability starts to decline).

Something that I feel would be difficult for Yuu is that the characters often use slang (Cater, Floyd, Idia, etc.) and/or uncommon words (like Vil’s “pulchritude”). The former may not follow the standardized rules of a language or may be idioms (other non-literal meanings for common words), which could make it hard for a non-native speaker to understand. The latter would not be used that often, so Yuu would be forced to guesstimate what the word means. I’d imagine this would make fluency challenging, because as immersed as Yuu is in Twisted Wonderland, less frequently used words are harder to grasp.

Maybe Crowley cast a translation spell ON Yuu so that they can still converse with people in the common tongue whenever they leave NRC? Or, since the events basically occur in an AU, more than a year has passed so it has allowed Yuu more time to absorb the language. Language in TWST and how it works… It’s really interesting to think about!

[nylibrty]

girl with the tattoo ⸝ ⸝ ⸝ chapter two

「pairing」 breanna stewart x riley carter (oc)

「summary」 riley is pretty sure she just made breanna hate her, what happens when breanna invites her to dinner?

「cw」 n/a

「notes」 sorry this took so long... pls forgive...

series masterlist

as she left, kayla and kennedy quickly caught up with her. "oh hey guys, did i forget something or?" riley asked, attempting to walk past them in order to get home, not in the brightest mood to ruin any more relationships with her new teammates.

"oh no you're good! we were just wondering if you wanted to come get drinks with us or something," kayla started.

"a rookie welcoming, if you will." kennedy quickly finished kaylas sentence.

riley smiled, the two girls already putting her in a better mood. "i'd love to."

and with that, kennedy and kayla took riley on a tour around town. after about an hour of walking around and talking, mostly kayla asking riley about her college career and just simple get-to-know-you stuff, they finally ended up at a bar. sitting down they each ordered their drink of choice. riley chose a beer, trying to not drink too heavily when she has practice in less than a day.

the conversation flowed well and by the time riley had made her way home, she was put into three new groupchats and was sure kennedy and kayla was taking her under their wing.

—

waking up the next morning was a struggle for riley. she had gone through her normal morning routine but was distracted practically the entire time. running through all the interactions she had with breanna yesterday to somehow get her to hate in her in less than 24 hours.

by the time she got the training it felt like her whole day was off. breanna was nowhere to be seen and she was sure she was purposefully avoiding her. riley sat with kayla and kennedy, something that began to become routine for her, quickly becoming close to the two girls.

"so, whats the deal with stewie? is she always like that with rookies?" riley asked nervously, studying the two girls faces who sat in front of her.

"what do you mean, stewie is like the nicest person here," kennedy laughed, rileys stomach sank, she must have really done something wrong to make her hate her this quickly. "why? is she mean to you or something?" kennedy followed up, leaning closer.

"no, shes just weird towards me..?" riley said, shrugging her shoulders. the two girls bugged her for more information and riley told her what happened yesterday. kennedy and kayla exchanged looks, seemingly talking with their eyes. "what? did i do something?" riley panicked, her eyebrows furrowing.

kayla laughed, "no! i'm sure its nothing..." she shrugged, clearing not sharing everything she had to say.

before riley could inquire any further about their comments, it was time to actually go start warmups. she sat down to start stretching, looking over to see breanna staring at her from afar. a chill went down her spine, a red flush spreading across her face. riley attempted to get herself together, taking a deep breath and focusing back on her stretching.

once she was done stretching they ran a few scrimmages. it went well for riley, the coaching team clearly impressed by her skill. after the scrimmage was done, she sat against the wall, sipping on her waterbottle.

"hey? you got room for one more?" breanna asked, startling riley.

"you can't sneak up on me like that." riley laughed, patting the floor next to her to signal breanna to join her.

the tall girl sat next to her, squirting the water from her waterbottle into her mouth. they sat in silence for a moment, both unsure of exactly what to say.

"so... you enjoying the team so far?" breanna questioned.

"yeah, yeah. its nice, i like it here." she grinned, not caring to notice that breanna definitely kept scooting closer to her.

they sat in silence once more, a clear awkwardness hanging in between them.

breanna set her waterbottle to the side, playing with her fingers, nervous about something. "i usually take the new rookies out for dinner as a welcome to new york kinda thing... i was wondering if you could make it? it'll be tonight after practice." she rambled.

riley was shocked. a mixture of confusion and warmth filled her. she was so sure all about ten minutes ago that the vet surely hated her, but now she was inviting her out? she swallowed, considering her options, her thoughts were quickly interrupted by breannas voice once more.

"its not like mandatory or anything, i know you have a lot going on right now," she reassured the rookie.

riley cleared her throat, the choice clear now. "yeah no, i'd love to go." she smiled.

"perfect! ill text you the information after practice." breanna grinned, that gummy smile making butterflies swarm in rileys stomach.

before she could respond, breanna was up and gone, getting ready for the next part of practice.

—

the rest of practice went smoothly, riley was a lot less in her head now that she knew that breanna didn't hate her. she still couldn't place her finger on what her deal was though, something clearly putting a wall between them.

she walked with leonie back to the locker room, small talk about their days and practice filling dead air.

"did stewie also invite you to some thing tonight?"

"yeah she did, are you going?"

leonie nodded and riley felt a weight fall off her shoulders. she was friends with some of the other rookies, but she was glad to have someone like leo going as well. before the conversation could go anywhere else, they had made it to the locker room and branched out to their separate lockers.

once riley was successfully changed and ready to leave, she looked up to see breanna only a few lockers down, clad in a sports bra and shorts. riley swallowed, unable to tear her eyes away from her physique, tight abs adorning her stomach and biceps bulging. breanna looked over and shot her a smirk. the rookie blushed a deep red, quickly averting her eyes back to her locker, fumbling to close it shut.

she heard a chuckle from breanna, her footsteps approaching.

"eyes to yourself, rook." she whispered in her ear, patting her back before walking off to refill her water bottle.

riley coughed, choking on her own spit. kennedy turned around, also coming up to her locker. "what was all that about?"

"i dont know," riley sighed, pushing past her to leave.

she was confused. confused with this new team, with this new area, and more importantly, was confused on what the fuck was going on between her and breanna.

she was distracted the entire ride home, barely paying attention to what was around her, and focused on getting back to the safety of her apartment. once she finally made it home, she dropped her gym bag and immediately got into the shower.

going about her post practice routine, she hadn't bothered to check her phone, not realizing she had several unread messages.

stewie:  156 Court St meet us there at 6:30.

leonie: youre still going right? i saw that stewie talked to you before you left

brooklyns finest: kt: WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT ABOUT RILEY CARTER

riley checked all of the messages, ignoring breannas message entirely and moving on to leo and the group chat. she typed out a quick yes, sending it to leo before seeing what kayla and kennedy had to say.

brooklyns finest:

kb: exactlyyyy, yall going to dinner tonight rightttt 👀

riley: its not just us two 🙄 she invited leo too.

kt: thats until she cancels last minute...

riley: shut up. its not like she wants me back or anything.

kb: so you DO want her!!!

kt: i knew it!!

riley: gtg

kb: give us all the details when you get home babe 😘

riley rolled her eyes and checked the clock before turning off her phone.

4:00 pm. she had 2 and a half hours to get ready. she could do this.

it wasn't even a date, there was no reason for her to be stressed. leo was gonna be there anyways, it was gonna be fine.

she spent the next hour being anything but fine. spamming kayla and kennedy with outfit choices and practically tearing apart her tiny closet to find the perfect outfit. after what felt like forever, she found a cute dress to wear, showing the perfect amount of skin. by the time she did her hair and makeup and paced around her apartment enough times to calm herself down, she was finally ready. she took a deep breath and left her apartment. riley made her way to the subway and rode towards barclays. she checked her phone multiple times, making sure leo wasn't texting her last minute that she actually was canceling, and to her enjoyment, there was still no text about any sort of cancellation.

she made it to her stop, coming up from underground and beginning to walk towards the restaurant. it wasn't very far from the station, only a couple minutes which she was grateful for. leo was standing around by a pole close by to the restaurant, waiting for riley.

"hey! i was worried you weren't coming." leo laughed, walking towards the entrance with riley.

they continued with the small talk, making their way into the restaurant and finding breanna sitting at a table with ivana and jaylyn beside her. there were two seats left, one right by breanna and one at the end of the table.

leo, who was steps ahead of riley, took the one at the end. which left riley with one place to sit.

right next to breanna.

breanna pulled the chair out for her, a simple gesture that she didn’t even acknowledge. riley secretly appreciated it, sitting down next to her and feeling the comforting presence of the older woman next to her.

conversations flowed as drinks were given and riley fell smoothly into conversation with ivana and jaylyn. breanna was talking to leo, her presence still lingering with riley. she caught her stealing glances with her more than once, a blushing smile on her face.

as dinner went on, everybody had ordered and was enjoying their meals, laughing and talking about past experiences. riley was glad she went, truly. it was nice to get to know people the same age as her and the people who had similar experiences as her.

"alright guys, i gotta get home. thank you for dinner stewie, and everybody else, it was nice to get to know you!" jaylyn said, gathering her items and heading out the door.

with that, most everybody else filtered out. now, it was just breanna and riley.

fuck.

"dinner was nice, thank you." riley said, turning her body to face breanna.

she hadn't taken the time to actually look at breanna tonight. hadn't taken the time to be this close to her and study her features and what she was wearing tonight.

a simple graphic t-shirt with a white button-up over it, she almost laughed at it, coming to a nice dinner wearing her silly outfit.

"you really wore that," riley gestured towards her outfit, "to dinner?"

breanna chuckled, glancing down to examine her own outfit. "what? you don't like it?" she laughed, nudging her with her elbow.

"oh trust me, i like it. you just look stupid, stewart." she raised her eyebrow, returning to that original banter that took place when they first met.

"awh cmon rook, my stupid outfit fits well with the dress number," she grinned, referring to rileys dress. "you look good, by the way," she commented softly, averting her eyes and taking the straw of her drink into her mouth.

"you're not too bad yourself." riley smiled.

they sat in comfortable silence for a moment longer. riley couldn't get over how her heart was bursting or how she wanted to run around and gossip about this like a teenage girl.

before she knew it, breanna had paid for the bill and was walking her out to the subway.

"you have my number, if you ever want recommendations for stuff around town, just text me!" breanna grinned, hearing riley complain about not knowing where to start.

"yeah, yeah, new york native." riley rolled her eyes, standing with breanna as she waited for the subway.

"im serious though, text me anytime rook. i dont bite," she laughed.

before riley could get another word in, the subway was pulling in.

"well, i guess i'll see you tomorrow." breanna said, turning to face her.

"yeah, i'll miss you." riley grinned.

they sat and stared at each other for a moment, in complete silence. as if magnets were pulling them together, suddenly they were getting closer, lips only inches away from each other.

"fuck, i got to go, i'm sorry." riley mumbled, realizing the subway was about to leave at any moment.

breanna snapped back to reality, clearing her throat and pulling away. her face was bright red and she was looking anywhere but rileys face. "yeah—fuck—im sorry riley." she said, realizing what she had just almost done.

"i-its fine," riley brushed it off quickly, leaving without a goodbye.

[randomfoggytiger]

1998: Gillian Anderson and Her Family

Gillian Anderson is strongly protective of her 4-year-old daughter, Piper. Says Anderson’s mother, Rosemary, “Motherhood has been enormously healthy for her. She’s more secure.”

Five years ago, a 24-year-old Gillian Anderson walked onto the set of The X-Files a virtual unknown....

No longer the sidekick, Gillian (pronounced “Jillian”) Anderson has watched her popularity propel her to the top tier of her profession, financially and artistically....

At the same time, she is struggling to maintain her balance, with a non-stop workload, frenzied fans and a 4-year-old daughter. “The only thing I care about,” she says, sitting in her trailer one evening during an X-Files shoot, “is that I’m perceived as a hard worker. This is what I love to do. This is my job.”

...“She certainly has established herself as an equal partner” on The X-Files, says her mother, Rosemary, a computer specialist who lives in Grand Rapids, Mich. “When she first started, I think, she was more frightened than she tried to show. But I also think her talents meshed with the writers’, and it’s becoming more of a vehicle for her. For a while there, she used to joke that she didn’t have much to say except, ‘What do you think it is, Mulder?’ ”

...Her daughter, Piper Maru, is a fixture on the X-Files set, and on this day is being carried around piggyback by the actress. The cherubic child, with her straight bangs and tiny rain boots, has been adopted by the cast and crew and often raids the prop truck for bloodied fake hands to wave about.

Anderson shares custody with her estranged husband, former X-Files assistant art director Clyde Klotz. The actress herself admitted she was difficult to be married to — it lasted less than three years — because of her strong will and fierce ambition. There is no doubt that Anderson is focused, and single-minded. On the set, she is highly professional and self-protective. While gossips would love to play up a feud between her and Duchovny, the truth is more complex. They seem to have a symbiotic, if somewhat strained, rapport, and they retreat to separate trailers during shooting breaks....

Born in Chicago to Rosemary and Edward Anderson, Gillian accompanied the family to Puerto Rico before settling in London, where her father studied film production. Her mother says she was adventurous and welcomed “new experiences.”

“One of my very favorite stories happened when we were in London,” Rosemary Anderson recalls. “It was her first day of nursery school. Her father was taking her down the stairs and she looked back up at me, saw my face and said, ‘Don’t cry, Mom.’ She was fine. I was not.”

After nine years, the Andersons returned to America and settled in Grand Rapids.

“By the time I was 11, I had been on 40-some planes,” the actress says, lighting another cigarette. “I remember my parents taking me to parties a lot. Running around, then falling asleep. Having my pajamas on and being carried to the car. … Some of my greatest memories are of them shoving me in the back of a VW Bug and sleeping on the way home.”

Now, her mother says, having a child has changed Anderson. It’s been “enormously healthy for her. I marvel that she can juggle that insane schedule. And she’s definitely become more secure, as an actress and as a parent. I think it makes her more serene.”

Anderson confirms that. “Your life lands on a plateau of seriousness all of a sudden, and things become more weighty. Since I’ve had Piper, I’ve been a much happier person. She is the most important thing. That’s what I think of first.”

...Doing the show, which requires 16-hour days 10 months of the year, has been grueling, and Anderson says her biggest fear is “insanity.” (She was previously quoted as calling her stint in Vancouver “a death sentence,” which did not go over well with Carter.)

She takes a sip of bottled water. “I think a big fear, too, is experiencing pain that will not end. I know pain, and I also know that it passes. But I guess when I’m in that, one of my fears is that it won’t end.”

Another real fear is being adored to death. Last summer, while shooting the X-Files feature film — reportedly a $60 million project — she was stalked by paparazzi trying to snap her with Piper at a playground. “In one area,” she says, “there were so many converging on me at once that the whole shopping area got together and talked to the sheriff’s department, and they were no longer allowed in that area. It makes me furious.”

Another fear is more insidious: self-destruction, as exemplified by her faux pas at the Emmys. Or her reluctance to fully embrace her current stardom. “I have to look at how I may have been involved in creating situations in my life,” she says. “How much can I not accept good things in my life? That I have to perhaps subconsciously create something that immediately shows me I’m not …”

Her voice trails off. She seems smaller, and more fragile, than her X-Files character.

A nagging sense, after all this time and hard work, of not deserving her current success?

She exhales a stream of cigarette smoke and lets a small smile cross her face. “Ultimately,” she sighs, “it probably is.”

-February 1998

[dcdreamblog]

As someone who works in American health insurance (boo hiss) customer service, one call that I get frequently, about once every two months is "why doesn't my plan cover Miraclo (tm)?" And then I have to explain that there's no such thing as "generic Miraclo" and don't even get me started on so-called "herbal Miraclo."

So may I ask you to write a bit about the history of Hourman and why Miraclo (tm) isn't covered by most health plans?

Ok, I agree with you but I should warn you, if you are a person familiar with the medical field this explanation is going to make you cringe yourself sideways. Here goes. 1. Rex Tyler AKA Hourman, was not a pharmaceutical scientist by trade. He was a biochemist. His job was not to invent medicine specifically and he invented Miraclo on accident. The only three subjects it was ever tested on were

A. Tyler himself B. Rats C. An owl (if certain stories are to be believed)

2. Miraclo was never released to the public and we still don't know what's in it. As with any drug or chemical agent that grants superhuman abilities it is HEAVILY controlled and the only reason it hasn't joined the likes of Venom on the most wanted list is because it never leaked to the drug trade in the first place.

3. SPEAKING of Venom, Miraclo is how that drug got started when only PART of Tyler's notes ended up in the wrong hands.

And finally,

4. Miraclo is not safe for human consumption over any extended period.

It makes the muscles stronger, but not as strong as it makes them FEEL. Making it super easy to deeply injure yourself.

It only lasts for an hour (at MOST, for anyone other than Tyler its effectiveness can be measured in minutes if not less), meaning it would be useless for the treatment of basically any medical issue.

As you can expect from such a potent rush, the come down is worse. It leaves the subject weak, shaky, disoriented and aggravated.

It's addictive

It can only be taken once every 24 hours between doses without instant, violent overdose reactions.

If it IS taken "safely" over extended periods it strains the involuntary muscles, most specifically those around and within the heart. Placing the user at increased risk of random heart attacks.

It also sharply spikes your risk of developing virulent and aggressive leukemia

And, over time The debilitating effects after each dose become more and more permanent, meaning it makes the muscles it empowers weaker without it over time.

Before anyone even THINKS the words "but what about Hourman's son Rick" Rick Tyler is A. a metahuman B. using a form of Miraclo that makes it "nonaddictive" but doesn't get rid of any other side effects. C. Had cancer and D. spent several years retired under the assumption that the Miraclo rush had helped him kill a man.

I respect the Tyler men, deeply. We would not be living in this world we have, maybe even a world at all, without Hourman. Miraclo is a closely guarded secret for a lot of really good reasons and even their teammates have interceded multiple times with the worry that while it might make them for effective heroes it is almost certainly shortening their lifespans. (The original Hourman and Doctor Midnite infamously butted heads over it constantly)

The only difference between Miraclo and Kobra Venom is that nobody with a profit motive knows how to make Miraclo.

[mariacallous]

I’ve been practising medicine and providing abortions in Arizona for the last 29 years. When I first opened my own clinic in Phoenix back in 1999, getting an abortion was relatively straightforward. But over the past two decades, Arizona’s Republicans have tried to make it as difficult as possible for women to terminate a pregnancy. When the state goes to the polls on 5 November, we’ll be voting not only on who becomes president, but on whether abortion is a constitutional right. In a historically Republican swing state where Donald Trump is only just ahead of Kamala Harris in the polls, as many as 22% of respondents named abortion as their most important election issue.

That’s not surprising, given what is required to end a pregnancy in Arizona today. There are just nine abortion clinics in a state of more than 7 million people. Since pharmacies and physicians in Arizona aren’t allowed to send out abortion pills by post, women must travel to visit one of these clinics in person. A state-mandated “information session” describing the risks of the procedure is required at least 24 hours before every abortion (even though the procedure is usually far safer than childbirth). Federal law means most abortions aren’t covered by Medicaid, so they cost between $600 and $1,000 (£500-£770), plus two days off work, plus the cost of travelling across the state, plus two nights’ accommodation.

Perhaps that’s affordable if you have a decent job. But it’s not if you’re poor. “Pro-choice” is no longer an apt description for abortion access in Arizona, because while the procedure is technically legal up to 15 weeks (unlike in Texas, for example), many women aren’t in a financial position to make that choice. The New York Times recently ran a story showing that 171,000 women in the US travelled out of state for an abortion last year. Some travelled hundreds or even thousands of miles for a procedure that usually takes less than 10 minutes. Women are furious that it’s come to this, and they will channel their fury at the ballot box.

Arizona has long been considered a Republican stronghold, but the vast majority of people support women’s reproductive freedom, and Republican lawmakers have not been voting with with their constituents. Organisations funded by the Christian right, such as the Center for Arizona Policy, have lobbied state Republicans to adopt increasingly extreme positions. This is the political climate that led to the Dobbs decision, a 2022 supreme court ruling that there is no constitutional right to abortion, and it’s why so many of us worried that Arizona was going to revert to a full ban on abortion. Without the protections of Roe v Wade, the state could have returned to an 1864 law that banned abortions even in cases of rape or incest.

Thankfully, our state legislature voted to repeal the 1864 ban earlier this year. And the anti-abortion lobbying that culminated in the Dobbs decision has only made people more aware of what they stand to lose. When I wear my T-shirt printed with “Abortion is healthcare” to my local pilates class, women give me a thumbs up. It’s ironic, really: having fought to make abortion nearly impossible, Arizona’s Republicans may now have cost themselves the election.

Last month, I watched the presidential debate at home with my family. Joe Biden had dropped out, thank God, and there was an incredible optimism about Harris. She is unafraid to use the word “abortion”, for one thing. Biden rarely talked about it. Obviously, he was supportive of women’s rights, but he never seemed comfortable using that word. Nor did Hillary Clinton. So hearing Harris talk about our rights to reproductive freedom and bodily autonomy is deeply refreshing. With Dobbs, Harris has found her voice.

On the night itself, Trump resorted to making wild claims, arguing that the Democrats were “executing” babies. “Nowhere in America is a woman carrying a pregnancy to term and asking for an abortion,” Harris shot back. “That is not happening. It’s insulting to the women of America.” She was calm and articulate, while he seemed increasingly unhinged. She spoke of women suffering from miscarriages, of the physical pain that they’re experiencing. Her frankness about patients’ suffering – at one point she told the story of a woman who was denied emergency care and ended up bleeding out in her car – was a reminder that the country we live in now is different to how it was in 2016 or 2020. Women’s reproductive rights have been trampled on, and we have to be open about what this means.

The debate was an early indication of the gender split in this election. A recent NBC poll found men favour Trump over Harris 52% to 40%. With female voters, Harris leads Trump by 58% to 37%. I often say that there’s a man involved in every pregnancy, and I’m glad to see that some men are being more vocal about abortion rights. Still, it’s striking that while women are pulling away from Trump, men are gravitating towards him. A vote for him seems like a vote for a type of masculinity that sees feminism as toxic and regards men as the truly oppressed. How else to explain the appeal of a man who boasted of grabbing women “by the pussy”?

The strange thing is how out of step the Republicans now are with public opinion. Perhaps that’s why Melania Trump recently claimed to be passionately pro-choice. The Trump campaign is flailing over abortion, and now seems to be frantically trying to project a more reasonable image. Yet the Republican commitment to minimal government has always sat uneasily with their anti-abortion stance. If you’re a Republican, it’s possible to think that you should be able to carry an AK-47 without the government interfering, and think that the government should interfere in a woman’s decision over whether to carry a child, and not to see any contradiction between these two stances.

Even on their own terms, anti-abortion laws don’t work. Countries that ban abortions don’t have fewer abortions; they just have a larger number of unsafe abortions. If Republicans really wanted fewer abortions, they would fund more sex education and free contraception. As it stands, many want to ban birth control, an issue on which Trump has flip-flopped. This dissonance only makes sense when you realise that anti-abortion laws aren’t really about abortions. They’re about controlling women.

It’s now just a few weeks before the election. If you ask me which way I think Arizona will vote, I’d say blue. I live in Flagstaff, a city north of Phoenix, and traditionally a more conservative place than the capital. But there are Harris signs everywhere in people’s windows and front yards. We need a secular government that doesn’t interfere with people’s medical decisions, or impose its radical religious beliefs on the population. I’m feeling optimistic: I think people are seeing Trump for who he really is, and for how dangerous a second Trump presidency would be.

[crguang]

haven’t read kafka’s voice lines in a minute, but I just reread them, and like I need to know more. like her being a devil hunter. why were there devils on her planet in the first place, was it bc of the stellar on or just like smth else. why’d she become one. and it was always interesting to me that it seems like she kind of didn’t like her home planet, obviously she could be lying. ig she wasn’t that close to her family and she probably didn’t have friends bc she’s a loser and isn’t good at connecting w people. And I’m curious abt where and when she started saying "When making friends with someone, keep the right distance, in order to maintain a long-lasting relationship." and firefly thinks she doesn’t believe that? if Kafka didn’t care abt anyone on her home planet ig that would make sense? idk hsjjghsh I’m not coherent enough but I need more Kafka. I do wonder abt how people who can’t feel fear yk survive and all, but idk. Her sea voice like is also interesting like why was that such a personal place?

Also my fighter between the two kafcats os probably the happy one bc she’s just so cute…I want to a symphony a few days ago and I couldn’t stop thinking abt Kafka, like violin=kafka for me. She def would liked it, trust me. On a side note, do u think she’d be concert master? it’s like the best (violin I think) player and everyone tunes to them bc, and they usually get all the violin solos.

and I’m gonna have to clear out some stuff bc I don’t have enough storage for ptn…don’t ask. I know I’ll like it bc women, ugh I should just get more storage.

less than 24 hours til the banners come out im actually terrified, but umm we’ll see. And I have a quiz ig but you def got me covered fr (didn’t know you take comp too)

-🌠

now that ive read AND listened to her voice lines i find it curious that she seems to have a bit of nostalgia in her tone when talking about the destruction of her planet. like you can tell whenever she has a smile on her face as she says certain lines and she’s always so playful (spent a whole hour just listening to her yesterday im ill) but this line was one of the serious-ish ones. she could be acting all mysterious on purpose but i guess we won’t know until more info comes out…. i really wonder if she had friends or something before because she says she rarely ever saw the same person twice due to her work.

THE SEA VOICE LINE. HELLO. WAS NO ONE GOING TO TELL ME HOW EXCITED SHE GETS?! THE CUTE EMPHASIS ON “fiercest”?!?!?! YOU ALLLLL FAILED ME. she speaks so genuinely as if reminiscing that place then she composes herself after a pause… wow. my baby. she’s so cute 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

i also go violin = kafka and omgg going to a symphony sounds so nice i hope u had a great time. straight up unbiased thoughts i think she would get the solos because she seems really rigorous in her practice of the violin despite having a very unstable job. she doesn’t strike me as the type to go for easy to play pieces either, especially when you consider what kind of music she’d like. so she’d work for that solo!!

hope your pulls went well i thought i was gonna be devastated if she came at hard pity but turns out im too happy that shes home at all🥹

[ihaveforgortoomany]

Time spent and Schneider: more parallels to The Great Gatsby (story spoilers for everything before 1.9)

Again for a character with very little screentime, around 2 Books and less than 24 hours I seem to have alot to say on her and her impact on the narrative as a whole.

While Books 1 and 2 are set in the 1920s Jazz Age, more specifically I think it is set in the eyes of Scot Fitzgerald's view of the 1920s Jazz Age, focused on the hedonism personified in the nature of the Storm being manifested as gold and money replacing food. (While In Our Time was written by Hemingway, I have never read so I cannot fully explore that theme).

So.

Heres me talking about the failure of communication and relationships through the fickle nature of time and the time spent with others, featuring Schneider.

(Have a Vertin nui)

Gatsby and relationships

One of the core themes of the Great Gatsby by Fitzgerald is the failure of language to communicate meaning: what do I mean? What I mean is that all of the relationships in Gatsby ultimately fail or remain broken is because of the lack of communication, the ability to understand of empathise with others, keeping a barrier to truth and honesty under facades and lies.

For the sake of keeping this linked to R1999 I will just discuss the central couple Daisy and Gatsby. Not only does the relationship fail due to societal standards and the myth of the American Dream, at its core this is a tragic love story about two people who truly did not know each other in the slightest. Gatsby's true name was James Gatz, despite begging Daisy to be his alone, it is hypocritcial for him to demand fidelty depsite his own history of sleeping around. While the Book does spend alot of time looking at Daisy and Gatsby, to say these two innately knew each other is false, they met under Gatsby's facade of being from a rich background and had only knew each other for a few weeks and days before Gatsby went to war. Yet this was enough for Gatsby to commit the rest of his life to becoming someone Daisy would love and reunite with again, even if it was doomed to fail.

Reverse 1999 and time

So how does this relate to R1999? Ofc the theme of the game surrounds time, the cruelty of time being reversed and erasing people into non-existence but I would like to speculate that the game explores human connection as well.

For example, the Uluru event exploring how both Ezra and Spathodea try to overcome the differences and prejudices between arcanists and humans to work towards a shared goal and ultimately succeed, the stadium becoming a symbol of the joint efforts of arcanists and humans.

For Schneider, the time spent with her is few and far between, as the player and viewing Vertin we pick apart the scarce interactions and cling to the fragments her existence has left behind. We can research her background, the people and books and movies she was inspired by but truly we cannot understand her fully as a person. Regardless that does not change that fact that meeting her had an impact on both the player and Vertin and shaped the narrative, that connection with her even if it lasted less than 24 hours will carry on long after she is reversed.

This mirrors how in Gatsby, while the text is about him, his failed relationship with Daisy and the mystery about his identity we cannot fully understand him as a person with the fickle nature of time and his death. Time even if it isn't reversing into different eras and periods does often rob us of understanding each other, in reality someone like Vertin being born in the 1990s and Schneider in the 1920s would have likely never met had it not been for the Storm.

Does that mean meeting her was futile if she was a dead women walking? No. R1999 seems to hammer home that all time is important, and that we should value it no matter how long or short it maybe and ultimately carry forward. Even if Rayashki is gone, its values carry on in those who remain, even if Schneider and countless others who have disappeared in the Storm are gone, their existence still carries on in the people who remember them.

[anotherhumaninthisworld]

What caused the conflict between Robespierre and his supporters and Thermidorians that led to the events of 27/28th July? Everyone keeps saying different things

If we’re talking about a specific event that lead directly to July 27, the answer to me is pretty simple — it was the speech Robespierre held the day right before it, in which he called for new proscriptions against deputies in the Convention, the Committee of Public Safety (CPS) and the Committee of General Security (CGS), without being clear about exactly which ones he was targeting (even after explicately having been asked to to do so right after the speech was finished). If dissent between the robespierrists and other deputies, as well as more longgoing plans to undermine the former, had existed already before this speech was held, what ultimately happened on July 27 was not a result of these as much as something improvised in less than 24 hours in response to the sudden crisis it had caused by making everyone fear they might be on Robespierre’s list.

If we’re talking more about the underlying motives which made the situation on July 26-28 happen in the first place, for Robespierre’s part, he had grown convinced that the Convention and the two government committees contained conspirators within their midst. Exactly which people he suspected to be part of this conspiracy is hard to know for sure, seeing as he, as already stated, didn’t make himself clear enough in the speech (I’ve speculated a bit on which people I think it’s most likely he had in mind in this post). It is equally dubious whether Robespierre’s collegues at the CPS to some extent had supported his views or how much this new conspiracy was his own hobby horse. Regardless, Robespierre believed the conspirators had to be unveiled and crushed at any price, and, after openly having expressed his fears about them a couple of times at the Jacobin club, he finally decided to openly ask the Convention to take action.

When it comes to the people who overthrew Robespierre, once it was over and done, they would almost all give the same answer as to why they had acted the way they had acted — Robespierre was either acting like or aspiring to become a tyrant/dictator, and they killed him in order to put a stop to this authoritarian project. While I wouldn’t dismiss a fear like this to be nothing but a post construction, it can nevertheless also be established that, when looking closer at these guys’ activities shortly before thermidor, many can be revealed to have had motives grounded in personal dissatisfactions and/or fears of Robespierre as much as any eventual noble intentions. Some examples can be seen below:

Tallien (spoke against Robespierre during the session of 9 thermidor, was one of ten deputies to have signed the pampleth Conjuration formée dès le 5 préréal [sic] par neuf représentants du peuple contre Maximilien Robespierre, pour le poignarder en plein senat released shortly after thermidor) —  Openly denounced by Robespierre on June 12 on the grounds of being ”one of those who speak incessantly with terror, and publicly of the guillotine, as something that concerns them, to debase and disturb the National Convention.” His mistress has been imprisoned since May 22 (the warrant for her arrest was actually written by Robespierre himself, but idk if Tallien was aware of that) and he is in dire need to get her out of jail. In his memoirs, Fouché claims that Tallien was one of several deputies he in the weeks leading up to thermidor would tell: ”you are on the list, you are on the list as well as myself, I am certain of it!” no doubt alarming the latter.

Fouché (Pointed to by several contemporaries as the leader of/important for the conspiracy. Did however not play an active role during July 27-28) — was recalled from his mission in Lyon on March 27by a rather frosty decree written by Robespierre. After returning, Fouché possibly had a private meeting with him where he would have been scolded for his conduct (though interestingly, on April 8, Robespierre is recorded to have ”praised” Fouché after the latter had read a report regarding his activities in Lyon…) He has also come under suspicion for his alleged atheism and ties to certain hébertists (most importantly Ronsin who had been his collegue in Lyon before getting executed alongside the hébertists in March 1794). On July 14, Fouché was openly attacked by Robespierre, who called him ”the leader of the conspiracy which we have to thwart" and got him expelled from the jacobins. If Fouché wasn’t already plotting Robespierre’s downfall at that point he surely must have started doing so after this incident.

Billaud-Varennes (spoke against Robespierre during the session of 9 thermidor) — Indirectly denounced by Robespierre in his final speech, both through the phrase ”why do those who told you once that we are walking on a volcano think that we walk on only roses today?” and the suggestion to purge members of the CPS. Booed down and driven out of the Jacobin Club under shouts of ”the conspirators to the guillotine” when Robespierre rerread said speech there on the evening of July 26, which probably gave him a very strong feeling that he was on the menu and would be executed if Robespierre was not. Claimed after thermidor to during a CPS meeting loudly have accused Robespierre and Couthon of pushing through the law of 22 prairial without anyone else in the committee having been involved, leading to the session becoming so stormy that the windows had to be closed.

Collot d’Herbois (spoke against Robespierre during the session of 9 thermidor, was also chairholder during this session) — Driven out of the Jacobin Club under shouts of ”to the guillotine” at the same time as Billaud-Varennes. According to one report, this was not before he had thrown himself before Robespierre’s feet and begged him to reunite with the CPS. Had been tipped off by Fouché on April 20 that Robespierre was investigating the latter for his actions in Lyon, which would make him guilty by association. Claimed in his defence (March 1 1795) to once have been declared ”traitor and conspirator” by Robespierre, ”because I had strongly supported the useful and wise proposal that Lindet made, to require horses and carriages in each section of Paris, in order to provide for the supplies of the armies.” According to Michel Biard’s Collot d’Herbois: légendes noires et révolutions(1995) Collot and Billaud’s abandonment of Robespierre is best understood through their perception of his political role than it is by any eventual differences in political or religious matters.

Vadier, Élie Lacoste (spoke against Robespierre during the session of 9 thermidor, Lacoste being the one to demand an arrest warrant against Augustin Robespierre) — these were both members of the CGS. Robespierre had explicately denounced said committee, and particulary its agents, in his July 26 speech, ending by demanding it lose its autonomy to instead become subserviant to the CPS. The CGS had however already earlier that year been robbed of some of its special attributes, when, on April 20, a CPS driven police bureau, mainly directed by Robespierre, Couthon and Saint-Just, had been introduced, something we might imagiene also became an object of irritation. Two months later, Robespierre had also personally taken care one of the committee’s cases (the Catherine Théot affair, which I wrote about more at length here) was taken away from them to instead be run by robespierrists. The handling of said affair was also something Robespierre explicately denounced the CGS for in his July 26 speech. It is also commonly stated that Vadier disagreed with Robespierre’s religious ideas, he himself being a militant atheist, but I’m not sure for what the source for that is.

Fréron (spoke against Robespierre during the session of 9 thermidor, was one of ten deputies to have signed the pampleth Conjuration formée dès le 5 préréal…) — was never openly denounced by Robespierre as far as I’m aware, nor was the decree recalling him from his mission in Marseille, on the grounds of having gone to far when wanting to rename the city, been neither authored nor signed by him. We do however know Fréron had been close to the dantonists executed in April, thereby making revenge and/or fear of being seen as ”guilty by association” a possible motive. The same thing can be said for other men traditionally described as dantonists that we know worked against Robespierre, such as Bourdon de l’Oise, Thuriot, Guffroy etc.

Guffroy (was one of ten deputies to have signed the pampleth Conjuration formée dès le 5 préréal…) — disillusioned by the fact Robespierre and the rest of the CPS have failed/chosen not to act on the representative on mission Joseph Lebon after Guffroy multiple times had denounced him to them.

Bourdon d’Oise (spoke against Robespierre during the session of 9 thermidor) — Had spoken against the law of 22 prairial both June 10, 11 and 12, earning himself a reprimand from Robespierre on the latter of these dates. According to the memoirs of Pierre Nicolas Berryer, it was after this session Bourdon started plotting for Robespierre’s downfall, seeing in it ”a struggle to the death” between the two, and planning to on his own stab him to death with a cutlass.

Lecointre (author behind the pampleth Conjuration formée dès le 5 préréal [sic] par neuf représentants du peuple contre Maximilien Robespierre, pour le poignarder en plein senat released shortly after thermidor) — Openly spoke against the law of 22 prairial when it was introduced on June 10, asking for an adjournment and applauding the deputy Ruamps when he said he would blow his brains out was the law to pass. In the above mentioned pampleth, he wrote that it was when he heard rumors Robespierre was the only person behind the law he decided to start working to undermine him.

So as can be seen, there’s not really a single motive for the conspirators, but a whole bunch of them. To understand them better, it is also important to remember just how the political climate looked like by the summer of 1794. I think it’s safe to assume the trials and executions of the hébertists and dantonists in March and April had unnerved several of the Convention deputies, the death of Danton in particular being seen as evidence that anyone could be declared a counter-revolutionary. Then just two months later, the law of 22 prairial gets introduced by Couthon and Robespierre, a law which strips the Convention of its exclusive rights to bring its own members to trial. This just two days after Robespierre has presided over the Festival of the Supreme Being, an event which had put several members a bit off. With all these things combined, I don’t think it’s fully unreasonable people would be willing to believe Robespierre was up to no good/planning to make himself a dictator, especially if someone was actively spreading/confirming that fear. It’s also important to keep in mind that on both sides of the conflict, the deputies were overworked, tired, irrational and suffering from the summer heat. I think thermidor is therefore best understood if we assume none of the men involved in it were necessarily on their most rational behaviour when things went down.

[felixstudios]

Playground Swap AU!

This is an AU that swaps out which playgrounds the 16 managers from 1.3 reside in as well as trying to strike a balance between their own personality and the personality of the Cog they're swapping places with. Additionally, "gimmicks" {usually the cheat or power the manager is most known for} are swapped. Some job titles are swapped, while some are not- and that one was completely random just to add to the chaos of this AU.

Credit to the creation of this AU belongs in part to @peachymunmagenta for giving me the initial idea and I basically took it and ran off with it. They also came up with the TTC/AA swap!

This post is considered the "master list" of this AU. That means over time I will edit it to include links of extra information/lore made in other posts.

31. August, 2023

New Management Changes - Effective Immediately!

It has come to our attention that our newly hired managers have not had the expected outcome of getting rid of the Toons. While progress has been made in slowing them down, that isn't enough. We will be experimenting with new corporate structures that will move some of you to different districts to see if this helps the Toon problem. Some of you have also changed departments- if that is the case, contact your new boss for your new uniform within 24 hours of receiving this notice or else YOU'RE FIRED.

The new assignments are as follows:

1. Toontown Central & Acorn Acres

Swapped pairs: Buck/Chip and Spruce/Brian

Buck Ruffler, Acorn Acres Kudos Manager

Duck Shuffler, level 50 Cashbot

Fight concept

-Gains an override so that his last minute changes to projects become efficient and more beneficial to the company

-A little more serious, but he's still pretty out there.

-Buck's override is triggered if he spins his slots and rolls 777 {and will deactivate with another 777}. Additionally, his other slot outcomes have been changed while the printing stays the same.

-During an override, Buck would be very similar to Chip in canon in that he'd be monotone and incredibly hostile to Toons {but his speech impediment would still be there lol}. I feel like in a battle this would be reflected by Buck doing more damage, his slot outcomes changing to things that are way more negative for Toons {but also WAY more random}, the inability to receive a 'bust' outcome, and/or getting more slot rolls per turn.

Chip Revvington, Toontown Central Street Manager

Chainsaw Consultant, Level 5 Bossbot

-He leaves firing employees more up to chance than anything

-Despite being such a low level, since he's a manager he can fire any non-manager Cog. He just couldn't fire any managers that are above him, which is fine for the company since they don't want layoffs that high up their management chain

-Without his override anymore and also some of Buck's personality, he becomes quite friendly and even slightly outgoing. He even jokes about his chainsaw and how scary it looks when he's nothing like that

-Has WAY less cheats since he's literally the first manager now. It would still operate based on an RPM meter, but it'd be WAY more straightforward and forgiving... Something like +1K/turn regardless of what attacks are used, cheats draining all his RPM regardless of when it was used or how much he has, only having 2-3 cheats {and just one RPM meter}, and each cheat's trigger is easy to figure out or is literally said to players.

Spruce Campbell, Toontown Central Kudos Manager

Treekiller, Level 12 Cashbot

-He strategically steals paper and logs {along with other resources} from the Toons

-Although he still SEEMS to talk and act exactly the same as in canon, this is now just an act he puts on for the Toons so they don't realize how genius he actually is

-Becomes a little full of himself, but not to unreasonable standards. He just likes to boast about himself a lot

-In battle, his cheats would both be annoying like Brian's and use some of the resources he's been stealing

Brian {no last name}, Acorn Acres Street Manager

Prethinker, Level 24 Sellbot

-He just works on more projects than before but becomes a bit more outspoken

-Is now okay with admitting he made mistakes and doesn't hold it against himself very much

-His cheats now reflect the resources around him and have an underlying theme of wood and acorns

-Since he's also later in the game, his cheats are more complex and allow for his strategic prowess to truly shine

-A bit bolder than before, which sometimes backfires on him. This is especially true if he accidentally makes a miscalculation

2. Barnacle Boatyard & Ye Olde Toontowne

Swapped pairs: Misty/Prester and Mary/Holly

Misty Monsoon, Ye Olde Toontown Kudos Manager

Witch Hunter, Level 20 Lawbot

-She convinces large groups of people to have class action lawsuits

-Will send out anonymous letters to Cogs in an attempt to get them riled up against Toons and start a witch hunt against specific Toons {usually whichever one hurt her the most that week}

-Still very quiet, but now it's because she's incredibly bitter and jaded towards everyone and doesn't wanna talk to anyone

-Still has self esteem issues, but she buries this really deep so that way nobody knows about it

-If she does speak, it's usually something really vague. She prefers to do her mob collecting from the shadows so as not to trace it back to her

Prester Virgil, Barnacle Boatyard Kudos Manager

Rainmaker, Level 16 Lawbot

-He gains weather changing abilities, which he uses to cause disasters and convince the company they need to make insurance claims {or sometimes normal Cogs}

-Doesn't use... as many big words

-A bit more soft spoken, but still pretty obnoxious about things

Mary Anna, Ye Olde Toontowne Street Manager

Deep Diver, Level 10 Boardbot

-She's put her defenses up and does her deep searches with more bias and sass

-With bias now comes sometimes overlooking things or having a confirmation bias where things might not get as thoroughly checked

-Mary is now also a perfectionist trying to work through this flaw in her performance because it's causing her a lot of stress

Holly Grayelle, Barnacle Boatyard Street Manager

Gatekeeper, Level 7 Boardbot

-Does extensive research into pretty much anyone she or the company wants to interact with, hire, ETC. to determine if they're allowed to or not

-A little more mellowed out and not so bad of a perfectionist anymore, but she hasn't completely toned it down

-Quieter, but it's because instead of talking so much she's observing. This will inform future judgements she makes about others, for better or for worse

3. Daffodil Gardens & The Brrrgh

Swapped Pairs: Cathal/Flint and Ben/Cosmo

Cathal Bravecog, The Brrrgh Street Manager

Firestarter, Level 20 Bossbot

-He tries to help out his dad from The Brrrgh, but he just seems to always cause problems

-Very chill and laid back manager who outwardly doesn't show much reaction to his mistakes... at first.

-Over time {and in battle this would be reflected by entering different phases}, he becomes more and more insecure about it until he's clearly pretty anxious and worried. This results in more severe mistakes being made and so the cycle goes on and on

-Tries to get praise from his dad, but he's pretty sneaky around the subject

-He will gain Flint's fire abilities, and it does NOT mix well with his anatomy that's not built to take the heat

Flint Bonpyre, Daffodil Gardens Kudos Manager

Multislacker, Level 24 Sellbot

-Flint is 'burnt out' and doesn't have the emotional capacity to do much work. This would be literally represented by the flame on his head always being very weak

-Very quiet since he just doesn't have the energy to speak much

-Spends most of his time kinda staring off into space or only putting in just enough effort to not get fired

Benjamin Biggs, The Brrrgh Kudos Manager

Bellringer, Level 38 Sellbot

-He gets to have a mafia of his own and they go around "convincing" people to buy from COGS, Inc.

-Uses gossip and blackmail to control everything, basically

-Not really much for getting himself into trouble anymore and is WAY more interested on just finding dirt on anyone and everyone in case he encounters them at some point and needs to "persuade" them

-Instead of Satellite Investors, he has Bell Boys... lol

Cosmo Kupier, Daffodil Gardens Street Manager

Plutocrat, Level 13 Cashbot

-He uses the power of his money to create quite a bit of gossip. Money talks for him a lot

-Whether it's starting fake rumors, starting true rumors, or hearing gossip about somebody, he's paying for it

-While they no longer appear in battle, his Satellite Investors still help him out with a lot of stuff

-His cheats would still be ice themed, but they wouldn't be as extreme both due to not having a frozen office and for being earlier in the line

4. Mezzo Melodyland & Drowsy Dreamland

Swapped pairs: Belle/Tawney and Dave/Graham

Belle Dama, Drowsy Dreamland Street Manager

-She delegates her work to other Cogs and has to frequently nap due to her age

Mouthpiece, Level 30 Lawbot

Design concept

-One of her cheats would literally be not attacking for like 2-3 turns but in return she gains like 50-60% of her health back

-But even though she's old and a bit more frail, she's still got hands to throw. AKA she can do a lot of damage!

Tawney Esta, Mezzo Melodyland Street Manager:

Featherbedder, Level 16 Bossbot

-They do their work with less napping and delegation basically I guess

-Maybe more social

-I really didn't know what else to put here

Dave Brubot, Drowsy Dreamland Kudos Manager

Pacesetter, Level 66 Sellbot

-He basically does his show but like... really fast

-As a star performer, he sets ALL the trends, babe! Both in the company and even on social media!

-You thought he didn't slow dance before? Well now he REALLY doesn't slow dance

-Becomes more self-absorbed, leading to a lot of posters of himself being hung up around his lobby and his stage

Graham Payser, Mezzo Melodyland Kudos Manager

Major Player, Level 28 Bossbot

-He's slowed down a bit and replaced it with more drama!

-Think you can take on someone as beautiful, stunning, and perfect as him? Think again!

-Even without his signature speed to help him, he's still quite the formidable opponent who will use his strength and ranking in the company to his advantage

-Also WAY more into performing and showing off. Somehow. Because he wasn't already maxed out here.

[elektrischemaidchen]

Lisztober #11: Symphonie Fantastique

Madness has taken hold at the Maidchen court. What always comes across as so easy here, is a real challenge, which unfortunately also takes its toll. I now have a real coffee problem by now, so I sometimes have heart palpitations at night. Then there's the incredible time pressure to present you with something cool that has to be ready in less than 24 hours.

If anyone asks why we're sitting in a three-person cell in a asylum by November, tell them it's because of absinthe, reading too much Lautréamont and hysteria. Please.

And that brings us right back to today's topic. Yesterday we escalated. Really. So much so that one girl is hoarse and the other is on the verge of tinnitus. Additionaly, one of our speakers died due to the volume and overdrive. Here you can listen a true masterpiece by Maidchen standards. We had to stop in between, because of laughing over and over, again and again. Both while writing and during the recording itself. Even while cutting. And even more so when the neighbor simply started practicing the tuba for unknown reasons. I didn't even know he had a tuba. It must be new. Totally surreal. But luckily, he didn't call the police on us. And you wouldn't believe how many takes we “indulged” in. (There were 26. 26!) I hope we can convey these moments of pure joy. PLEASE LISTEN TO THE WHOLE SONG TO GET THE VIBE! ;)

The reason for this was our contribution for today, Berlioz “Symphonie Fantastique” aka probably the creepiest piece of classical music that has ever existed. And thank you so much, @franzliszt-official for giving us this opportunity.

So, here’s our plot summary:

We really always wanted to write something about this masterpiece of brainf***, but unfortunately we didn't have the right idea - and you see: With a gun to your head, even the muse must speed up. Let’s see how far we can go with this. The plot of the symphony - just like the story before and after it - is so obscure that it has become a kind of running gag for us. Life (and art) can't write better stories. Never ever. And before I tell you the whole story, if you don't know it yet: there's a wonderful YouTube video with a short summary that I highly recommend you watch (the whole channel is amazing!!!). WTF, Berlioz, really, WTF.

Oh well, it's still about Liszt. Liszt was a huge fan (Really, Franz. I love you, but why? WHY?) of this symphony, just like Wagner (but nobody here give a shit about Richard‘s opinion anyway)  Franz may not have been directly involved in the creation of the “Symphonie Fantastique”, but his piano transcription and his interpretations made a significant contribution to this work becoming one of the most important works of Romantic music. Liszt made it accessible to a wider audience, interpreted it and developed it further, thus having a lasting influence on music history.

That's why we originally wanted to deal with the “Dies Irae” theme, but let's be honest… everything stinks against the main story.

And then there is the “Idée fixe”, the central theme of Berlioz's symphony, the beloved, who appears again and again musically as a motif and ultimately drives him mad. You could also apply this to the Maidchen. Fun fact: 97% of all our lyrics have a hidden hint to Franz. Sometimes so well that Lacelove doesn't even notice ;) Whoever finds them all: Get in touch. You'll get an exclusive shirt and your own song written. I promise.

Oh, dearest, dearest love, you surely will never know that I’m gonna write to you A symphony of love  in just one night Oh, dearest, dearest love, I only dream of you and in my longing I wish you were here Oh, dearest, dearest love, Where have you gone? You dance with a hundred others You erase me from your mind Oh, dearest, dearest love, Fate is not fair My sky, full of violins But my heart, it's so heavy So heavy I try to forget you On noble pastures The shepherds who soothed me Make their songs known But then I see you before me With a smile like a sword You belong to someone else now You're...not worth it That's why I'm whistling opium now And will just kill you. DIEEEE! DIIEEEEE! OH GOD! JUST DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEE God alone knows, I will be judged for everything I have done and none of the heavenly angels will weep at my grave And so I see your face One last time before my face Oh, dearest, dearest love Why don't you save me? Oh, dearest, dearest love then it comes back to me You spawn of hell You are the queen of the witches. ORGIES! DAMN ORGIEEEEEEES! OH GOD! ORRRRRGIIIIIESSSS! Oh, dearest, dearest dearest, will you be angry with me? I invite you on the day of the premiere To find out Oh, dearest, dearest love then you'll be my wife Otherwise I'll threaten you with my own s*i*ide You know that very well IF YOU DON'T MARRY ME, I'LL K*** MYSELF! I'LL K**** MYSELF! AND IT'S YOUR FAULT!!!!! YAAAAAAAAA! And then, she actually married him.

[heylittleriotact]

I read the rules AFTER replying to the post. The title that most intrigues me is Senna Origins, because yeah, Senna. I might be a lil obsessed.

For you, anything! Thank you, friend 🥰

This is a portion from Senna’s backstory, which mostly focused on their upbringing and youth in the Feywild, and their activities within the Seelie Court as a young adult. I actually have yet to finish this because in the campaign that Senna exists in, they’re 472 years old and have spent around two centuries in the Material Plane and having to account for almost 500 years of being alive is… well it’s a lot.

I was picking them off one by one, pulling away pieces of a war machine that was driven by greed, privilege, and hubris. Lillian was becoming more and more powerful, her ideas were holding more sway, and I was becoming far too big for my britches: It was no longer enough for me to control the ebb and flow of the Seelie Court with my humble influence. I decided it was time to bless the Unseelie Court with my unique knack for taking out the trash as well.

(It’s vital to understand that the following decisions resulted in me ultimately drinking for roughly a decade straight in the Material Plane, and then sleeping for another 24 years to nurse away the cumulative hangover.)

Back when we had our silly little pissing contest with the Unseelie Court and Lillian and I were put on the front lines for a short time, the biggest battle we fought was against a monster named Baron of the Withering Spiritual Resilience - We called him Bows’r - He was big. He was mean. He was a graceless oaf (but really probably a lot more graceful than you know… un-Fey standards), and he led a battalion of four thousand to near victory against our own force. He was high ranking in the Unseelie Court, and I figured if I’d defused the powderkeg that was my own court, I may as well balance it out on the other side too.

I approached this differently though. There was a lot of sneaking, a lot of cloak and dagger, a lot more cloak, and a lot of being really, really careful that this didn’t get back to Lillian, or the rest of the Seelie Court, who still at best barely tolerated me.

See, my goal wasn’t to take down just Bows’r. My goal was to take down Bows’r, by goading him into an attempt on Oberon himself (actually knowing full well that I didn’t really have any kind of personal issue with Oberon, aside from the fact that he was one of them, and back then that was enough. Yes. I was an idiot, thanks.)

It would have worked spectacularly if I hadn’t suffered a betrayal within my own ranks which tipped Bows’r off, led him straight to Lillian instead of Oberon, and ultimately squared things such that the might of both Bows’r and Oberon were unjustly laid upon Lillian.

This was not just a matter of mistaken identity, a few bruises, and a socially awkward situation. The world of the fey is not so droll. No. This treachery meant that Lillian was implicated in the plot that was mine, and for the fact that Oberon’s name was even mildly associated, the perceived challenge was answered with the swift, practical retribution of The Hunter.

My love was taken away. Pierced by thirty-seven golden arrows even as I sought to buy her freedom with whatever means I could.

I watched it happen, I saw her face - content, relaxed - safe. I saw it fall to fear and surprise as the Green Lord appeared and took his prize, as triumphant and gleaming as any god would be in a tale told to you by someone else. I saw her curl, stretch, curl, shudder, and succumb on her feet to the wounds inflicted on her.

There was no time to explain, you see. Between my fatal error, Lillian’s false implication, and her blood on the mossy ground, less than a few hours had passed. There was no room to talk my way out, no way to talk her out, no army at our back, and nowhere else to go but… anywhere. And if you know even the loosest concept of anywhere, you know it means little to Oberon.

All I could do was watch as the Green Lord stooped and shouldered the body of a woman much larger than he, and all I could think of was the image of a hardened hunter hauling off a well-earned kill. Her blood trailed down his green shoulders and arms as he looked at me, without words.

“Release her,” I managed, from my broken and pitiful position on my knees. The hot tears that carved down my cheeks felt foreign and terrible. I felt, for the first time in my life, that I might be sick for the fear and grief that ruled my body now. I was no longer an instrument to the music: I had been swept up mercilessly in its unyielding fury.

The Green Lord’s cheek curled in a wry smile. “Set a trap, spring the line, and request from me that which is mine?” Lillian’s form was shifted up higher on the shoulder, and I swallowed back the gag that forced its way into my throat when I heard a bit of blood drip out of her own onto the forest floor. I forced myself to my feet, horribly aware of the soil and plant-life wedged deeply under my fingernails, horribly aware of the dryness of my own mouth and the wetness of my pants as I ignored the quaking in my knees and the sharp metallic flavour of fear on the back of my tongue warning me that my life was in very severe danger. I breathed in as deeply as I could - a shallow and sad attempt at best - but I forced my head high, forced my expression blank, and willed my forsaken knees still. There was music in this nightmare too. There had to be. I just needed to listen.

I looked Oberon in the face. In the eyes. And I said (as if it mattered, which around the Feywild, it very may well):

“Let her go, please.”

And he laughed in my face and disappeared from the forest in I don’t know… a fucking raincloud or something probably.

And he took Lillian with him. He took Lillian. My love, my queen, my hero. My best friend. My only real friend.

The problem - the real problem aside from him murdering my lover in front of my eyes for a crime that was not hers - was that he also took my child. My child that Lillian had only told me about moments before Oberon’s intrusion.

My beloved, and my future: Gone in the time it takes a leaf to fall from a tree.

[macgyvermedical]

Treating Diarrheal Illness

Someone recently sent me an ask about vomiting and diarrhea. I got almost all the way through writing it and then tumblr ate it. Didn't save it as a draft, didn't even put the ask back in my inbox, just poof'd it into oblivion.

But it was a good ask, and not one I get very often, so I still want to answer it- it essentially said the following:

How could a non-medical person in an apocalyptic setting treat someone who had severe diarrhea and vomiting, assuming the person in gastrointestinal distress was a doctor and could give them some direction? Can/should they give antidiarrheal medication and how would they go about doing that since the patient would probably throw it up?

So very glad you asked:

Diarrhea

The nice thing about most diarrheal illness is that as long as the person stays hydrated, they have a really good chance at surviving. Water is okay for hydration, but if the caregiver can get their hands on some salt, some potassium-based salt substitute, and some sugar, they can make a really easy and effective oral rehydration solution. The recipe is as follows:

Mix together:

1 liter of water

1/2 tsp salt (you want this to be slightly less salty than tears)

1/8 tsp potassium-based salt substitute (if you have this, great, if not, you can leave it out and it will still be effective)

8 tsp sugar

The goal is to get them to drink more volume of ORS than they are pooping- think at least a cup of ORS per poop.

Vomiting

The nice thing about uncontrollable vomiting is, again, that as long as the person stays hydrated, they will probably survive. Hydrating someone who can't keep anything down is a little trickier for the lay caregiver. Fortunately, there's another entrance to the GI tract.

The colon absorbs water. That's the colon's job. It takes the liquid coming from the small intestine and pulls water out of it until it becomes solid poop. A lay caregiver can take advantage of this process to hydrate someone if necessary by inserting a flexible tube (enema tip, catheter tip, NG tube, IV tubing, whatever relatively clean tube you have lying around that fits) a few inches into the rectum and SLOWLY instilling saline (1 liter water to 1/2 tsp salt). The colon can absorb between 2 and 6 liters of water this way per 24-hour period, which can absolutely keep a person hydrated even without an IV.

Diarrhea AND Vomiting

The annoying thing is that when diarrhea comes with vomiting severe enough to prevent being able to keep liquids down, neither of these really work.

So either your caregiver character needs a method that doesn't involve the GI tract at all, or they need to get creative.

IV hydration has a lot of drawbacks in the apocalypse. For one thing, it involves a lot of specialized equipment- the tiny catheters that sit in the vein, sterile tubing with a drip chamber, sterile fluids, and saline locks- all of which are nearly impossible to improvise. Plus, in the case of this ask specifically- doctors generally don't know how to start IVs. That's a nursing skill and unless a doctor is an anesthesiologist they probably haven't put an IV in since med school (where they did it exactly once).

Subcutaneous (subq) hydration is slower and requires all the same supplies. The nice thing about subq though is that unlike an IV catheter, which has to sit in the vein and takes skill/experience to place, in subq hydration the caregiver only has to place a catheter into the patient's fat (something a lot easier to talk someone through). This can instill about 60ml/hr (about 1.5 liters/24 hr). If they have the supplies and can throw more than one catheter in the person, they can probably keep them hydrated this way.

Recommendations

What I would recommend for this story, however, is to pile a bunch of anti-nausea remedies on top of each other to try to get the puking under control, then work on the diarrhea.

If this were my patient and I was in the apocalypse, I would start by putting a cool rag on the back of my patient's neck and have them smell an alcohol pad or some mint, help them wash out their mouth so it doesn't taste like puke, and try to keep them from puking for about an hour. If they make it that long, I'd start with having them drink about an ounce of clean water. If they don't throw it up over the course of the next half hour, I'd give an ounce of coca cola (I don't usually do brand names, but coca cola has a high concentration of phosphoric acid, which is a great anti-emetic plus the bubbles can help with nausea as well).

I'd then drop to an ounce every 15 mins, then an ounce every 10, alternating water and coke, or ORS and coke. The goal is very small amounts of liquid with time in between. If they become severely nauseous, back off and start again after a half hour. If they throw up, start the whole thing over again.

If at any point during this they had a prescription medication available like ondansetron, compazine, or promethazine, they could crush it and have the patient put it under their tongue- that way they wouldn't have to swallow it and risk throwing it back up. Some of it would absorb, and if they happened to swallow some, that would also be great.

Once the vomiting is moderately under control, they could give bismouth subsalicylate (pepto-bismol) and loperamide. Both work against diarrhea. For loperamide, the dosing is two tablets after the first loose stool, then one after each subsequent loose stool. Bismouth subsalicylate and loperamide can be taken together.

Stopping Things Up

A question a lot of people ask is whether you should take anything to stop diarrhea. This usually comes with the idea that the person with diarrhea must be pooping for a reason, and stopping it up is trapping an infection in there and making it worse.

If the diarrhea is being caused by a bacteria or virus, that infection is in the walls of the digestive tract, and it spreads to other people via infectious poop. Pooping does not get rid of the infection. It just makes it more likely that someone else will catch it, and that the patient will become dehydrated. So taking medication to slow down the poopcano is generally a good idea here, since the goal is basically just to wait until the immune system kicks the infection or antibiotics wipe it out, and pooping doesn't help with that.

Now. If the diarrhea is being caused by a toxin, including a toxin from, say, c-diff (an infection from a bacteria that takes over the gut after some antibiotics and causes life-threatening diarrhea/colitis), taking a medication to stop the poop is a bad idea- since the toxin will get trapped and continue to cause problems. Same if it's something like a food allergy or intolerance- it's going to keep messing you up until it's out, so better to let it get out.

How can you tell? Well, here's where I refer you to a doctor. In this situation, the doctor might be able to make an informed choice on whether they wanted to take an anti-diarrheal medication based on what they thought was causing the vomiting and diarrhea.