#the order was decided by how much each character and their storyline matches the other btw

[elliedinanguish]

the jamie tartt to evan buckley to james potter pipeline is so real to me

[bridgerton-bard]

Bridgerton Season 3 Rambles

Warning: Spoilers for Romancing Mister Bridgerton and Season 3 of Bridgerton on Netflix

Just a compilation of thoughts that I have had about Netflix's adaptation of Romancing Mister Bridgerton for Season 3.

The combination of writing and/or editing was definitely different, and not necessarily in a way that I enjoyed. I am not a cinematographer, so I can't necessarily say why, but this season definitely felt like a much faster pace than S1 & S2. This is especially true for part 1. Prior seasons felt like they were meant to be watched casually and understood easily on the first watch. This season was so dense that I ended up re-watching part 1 again just to make sure that I didn't miss anything. Part 2 did feel like a slightly more reasonable pace, but still faster and more chaotic than any other Bridgerton season. Given that Netflix controls exactly how many episodes and how long they are, I wish they had decided to do 10 episodes so that the story could be slowed down to a more enjoyable pace and less context for each storyline had to be cut for time.

I liked all of the side stories. There are no characters in this show that I don't want to watch. Knowing the backstory from Queen Charlotte, it was so great to see Violet with Marcus (her garden is most certainly in bloom 🌸) and to see Lady Danbury get some closure from the past. It was also great to see more of the continuation of Lady Danbury and Queen Charlotte's friendship. Watching the Featherington women reconcile with each other was probably my favorite of the side plots. I enjoyed the Mondrich storyline. (🎉 Welcome to the ton, officially, Mondrich family! 🎉) I was a little skeptical about how the Benedict/Lady Tilly storyline was going to prep him for S4 (🤞) at the end of part 1, but fully onboard after part 2! I just wish we had more time to see the romance between Colin and Pen build before and after their wedding.

Side note: Do we think that Netflix/Shondaland had always planned for Benedict to be bi/polyamorous, or do we think that choice was made after they were heavily accused of queerbaiting in their characterization of Benedict?

Colin's realization of love seemed rushed even in RMB, but it seemed out of place as it happened in the series. There needed to be more development. Maybe we were meant to see his feelings growing through Colin's conversations with Eloise about Penelope and Cressida, but due to his characterization as "good guy Colin", it mostly just seemed like an older brother who wanted his two friends to reconcile? There was something missing. If the show had gone in book order and Kanthony/Benophie had been around, Colin maybe could have realized his love based on witnessing how those couples interacted?

In my opinion, all of the time in part 1 spent on the Queen coming up with a new name for a diamond ("sparkler") and then agonizing about naming one could have been put to better use. I know that the show doesn't want to bore watchers by automatically having the female Bridgerton lead of the season being named the diamond on repeat, but it's functionally the same and 10ish minutes of screentime that could have been better served elsewhere. Especially with the Queen playing such a big role in the potential match between Francesca and Lord Samadani as well as the reveal of Whistledown, I could do without the agonizing over the special title the female lead will get.

I really missed Lady Danbury playing the role of encouraging Penelope to be herself the way she did in the books. I know Lord Debling might have taken on some of that role in the Netflix series, but there's a different dynamic when Penelope realizes her worth based on a suitor compared to the objective perspective of a smart woman in the ton. To me, Netflix Pen felt like she gained some confidence simply based on that Debling was interested and not that she actually realized she was desirable. Whereas in the books, Lady Danbury encourages Pen to be more confident and show more of her personality because it makes her more authentic and fun to be around.

Speaking of Lord Debling, we were promised during the press tour that Debling wasn't going to be used as a plot device to make Colin propose, and that Colin would express his feelings to Penelope without that sword hanging over his head. But what we got was Violet mentioning to Colin that Lord Debling was planning to propose to Penelope which prompted Colin to rudely interrupt them and cause Debling to rescind his proposal????? I really did enjoy that book!Colin loved Penelope for being Penelope and proposed to her even though he knew that nobody else would and it would lower his social standing to marry the unpopular spinster girl who read romance novels.

In general, past seasons have felt like even where Netflix/Shondaland changed plot points in the books, the changes were still correct in the characterization. While the above might be correct to Colin's characterization it's a significant downgrade from the story that was already written. Why did that need to be changed?

Speaking of characterizations, I really enjoyed the characterizations for Francesca and John. They're such different characters to the other leads on the show and I really appreciated that both seemed to be characterized as neurodivergent in some way. It's nice to see the show acknowledging that gay people, neurodivergent people, etc. still existed in regency times even if the public awareness/conception of them was different.

I wish we had seen more of Colin and Pen repairing their relationship after Colin learned that Pen was LW. I know they were trying to build the drama, but the whole time it felt like Colin was two seconds from applying for an annulment, which was not even mentioned in RMB. Again, it just felt like too much was implied and not shown here, or that the show's characterizations were off from the books.

I enjoyed the peek into Cressida Cowper's world that we got this season. She's no longer just an antagonist cardboard cutout that's moved around the ballroom to create conflict. It's nice to understand her motivations. I really appreciated her storyline this season and I'd love to see a spinoff about her life in Wales and her eventually making her way to the continent or back into the ton. The scene where her mother threw her under the bus as she was counseling her that it was every woman for herself in the ton was beautifully sad. I think it was only in that moment that Cressida realized the only way for a young woman to do well for herself in the ton is to befriend and rely on her peers. I appreciated the aspect of tragedy that Cressida only realized her bad moves when it was far too late to go back and correct them.

Another issue with the writing: some of the modern language was slightly jarring. I know Bridgerton flirts with the modern/regency dichotomy because there are multiple parts of the show that aren't period-accurate. That being said, you're really on the cusp when a character in a regency period drama says "Don't come for my cane". I'm not saying I want it to be 100% period accurate with bonnets, etc. However, I think maintaining the use of Regency slang and slightly modernized regency phrases/syntax is part of what helps make it feel "regency" even though the fashion, music, and social norms about race and sexuality are not accurate to the regency period. The same can be said for obviously acrylic nails. Not everything needs to be period accurate, but some things are definitely a step too far. Big disparities like this are distracting and remove people from the story.

I know people have a lot of feelings about Michaela Stirling, however, I want to let Netflix/Shondaland cook. We don't know yet whether Francesca is also going to be bi or whether she's going to be a late-to-life lesbian. We truly have no idea. I have liked how they've handled Francesca/John so far, so I'm just going to wait to see how this plays out.

I think that's all for now. I'd love to hear anything you'd like to add, as I could yap about Bridgerton for hours.

Varley . . . release the BUGS!

[shen-ne]

Chemistry, Comfortability & Continuity...or how Kinn & Porsche keep selling it.

In order for me to believe in two characters being in love on screen, they have to show me three things: chemistry, comfortability and continuity. Thing is when I think about it, this rule I have is specific to BL. I have seen some awful display of "affections" so far. And in order to protect myself from further great disappointment, I had to be apprehensive and install rules: slash, pick and choose. While continuity can be put in parenthesis, due to several reasons I will explain later, chemistry and comfortability cannot. They feed each other alternatively and are primordial for a convincing love story between two persons: they need to be well understood and incorporated within characters romantically involved with each other (long post).

How do I define chemistry? - It is the pull and clear attraction that exists between two characters (can be for several people at the same time but for the sake of this post, I'm talking about monogamous relationships). The subtle bond that makes the audience understand that two characters are on the same wavelength romantically and compatible for one another.

What about comfortability? - Another synonym would be natural. This has more to do with the actors being good actors than anything else. Showing to the audience through their characters that they desire their partner and convincing the audience of that desire. Acting out intimacy and affection smoothly while respecting the flow of the story displayed on screen.

Now, for continuity - it is both showing two individuals being in love throughout time and showing variation of that love throughout time (what I call variation is lots of kisses, making love, stares, different type of kisses, fucking, touches, longing, tenderness, cheering, the details, caresses, words of affection etc...). In real life, most people having romantic feelings for each other do not stop showing affection to one another after their first kiss, right? So why should love on screen be any different. This is somewhat rare in BL for several reasons. First reason, the show wants to keep the audience interested and only couple the two characters by the end of the show so no continuity is possible. Second reason, the show has enough time to show continuity but decided that the first kiss was enough material to show love: so it doesn't bother for more. Third reason, the show shows continuity but it is not enough both in time and/or in variation. Fourth, the circumstances of the characters' storyline doesn't allow them to show continuity even if they could.

Kinn & Porsche display the 3 on screen and I just love it. LOVE IT!

If two characters have chemistry but no comfortability, it is the equivalent of a slap in the face to the audience. We all have experienced, at least once, two characters having great chemistry and said chemistry being thrown out in the sewer the second they have touched each other lips. No movement of lips, no emotions conveyed, just flat completely flat and more often than not accompanied with actors being out of characters/showing discomfort. Or the opposite, eating each other faces awkwardly and/or being clumsy. The audience is completely thrown off from the scene because the chemistry doesn't match the comfortability. This is the worst feeling an audience could experience after waiting so long for two characters to be intimate.

If two characters have comfortability but no chemistry, there is no point in pursuing either. It always start with chemistry.

Now Kinn & Porsche.

It has been said over an over, but it is never said enough. The level as to how they convince the audience of their love week after week, is mind blowing sometimes. I don't know if it is because I'm not used to have that much being shown with two characters in love, but I am constantly amazed of what they are able to convey and crave for more.

I mean look at this!

His love for Porsche pours out from the screen. Completely and utterly in aww of the man in front of him, cannot believe his luck to have found him. For Porsche to have chosen him, for the man in front of him to be here with him at this instant. Look at his eyes!

Do I have to say more on how completely in love Porsche is with Kinn. The comfort of being within his embrace, safe, loved and pampered by this man, the way he looks at him...completely giving himself to him, his emotions on a plater...Lord.

Their touches...they are always touching each other. They can't stop, ruffling hair, caressing the other for comfort, Kinn's thumb having a life on his own etc...and all of this in the most natural way. I'm just...I want more.

When you look at them, you feel like they want to be inside each other skin so badly: to not let go of the other and just be. Their portrayal of passionate love is a feast for my eyes.

On top of their already amazing chemistry and comfortability, Kinn & Porsche give us continuity. Showing us their intense love and devotion for one another through their gestures, gaze, act of love and time. Something I will miss dearly with how the upcoming episodes are looking.

(...I mean I also want the angst...just think of the reunion they will offer after it)

[chainofclovers]

Ted Lasso 2x8 thoughts

I am so lucky that the creators of Ted Lasso decided to make this entire show specifically for me. #blessed

If last week felt like a bit of breathing room (albeit tense, poignant, character-progressing breathing room) with distinct narrative lines, this week’s episode was a chaotic yet tightly-written swirl of pain and hope and sadness! No neat subject headers for this one, y’all. Just my brain and heart in the inadequate form of a bulleted list. It is the medium available to me at this time.

I am going to remember the moment when Ted calls Sharon and tells her his father killed himself for the rest of my life.

(I could say a bunch of stuff about his face and what he says and how he tries to hide his tears from Beard right after and how insanely much I adore this character and ahhhhhhhh but I’m just going to leave that scene there in our collective memories.)

Jamie. JAMIE. Higgins has given some great advice about love on this show, but his musings about his up-and-down relationship with his own father were not helpful in the context of Jamie’s dad, who is an abusive piece of shit. I really adore that all of the main AFC Richmond staff members are realistically a bit hit-or-miss with their advice and life philosophies (some are mostly miss this season, of course).

And I am completely in awe of the moment when Jamie punches his father. The way he just stands there after Beard kicks his dad out of the locker room. The way you can hear a pin drop. And Roy—Roy who is learning in so many areas of his life about his influence on people, learning that the things he needs aren’t necessarily the same as the things other people need—is the one to cross the room and hug him. Hold him, really, with the tenderness Ted used when he hugged Rebecca outside the gala in 1x4. God.

I’ve thought a lot about how s1 was about giving people a soft place to land. There’s always an angel there when you need one. There’s always an opportunity to be kind. If you look for someone, you find them. If you look for the good in someone, you find the good. And as everyone works through their individual journeys in s2, that can’t always be the case anymore. But there are still so many moments of angels on this show, and it’s not about chance and serendipity and fate [not that it was about that in s1] but about the effort it takes to become someone who can be there for someone else. Or who can be there for yourself. I’m so proud of Jamie for physically fighting back against his father. I’m so proud of Roy for being the one who recognized what Jamie needed.

I have every feeling in the world about how Ted is almost totally frozen both times (s1 and s2) he witnesses Jamie’s father abusing him. In s1, he was still there for Jamie after, and I have every reason to believe he’ll be there for Jamie after this incident as well, but that frozen stance HURTS. He’s in so deep with his pain about his own father that it’s like he physically cannot snap out of it to act in the moment. It seems entirely outside of his control, and it breaks my heart, because Ted wants so badly to be a good father, a good coach, a good friend, a good partner, a good patient. He’s there for people in all kinds of ways, even in his current less-than-capable state. He takes care of Sharon post-concussion and even gets her a new bike! During the disastrous match at Wembley his coaching is ineffectual and everything is chaos but he’s the last one standing on the pitch! But this really awful thing keeps happening to Jamie and Ted is just…frozen in the face of it. Like one of those nightmares where you’re running in place.

The frozen-in-place nightmare also kind of applies to the way the total separation between Ted and Rebecca feels, too. I have never for a moment doubted the writers’ intentions in setting these characters up as soulmates on parallel journeys, and I’m actually really digging (on a story level) how disconnected they are right now. It is IMPRESSIVE that their absence in each other’s lives feels like such a glaring loss, one we cannot forget even as there are so many other things happening onscreen. It is 100% not just shipper goggles making me process information about Ted while thinking about Rebecca and information about Rebecca while thinking about Ted. I know there are a lot of really angry and frustrated people in the fandom right now (both T/R shippers and T/R antis and non-shipping fans who don’t get why s2 is different from s1) and while I understand being frustrated by choices characters make, and frustrated by the feelings the show makes us feel that we just want to feel more of or less of, I continue to agree with pretty much every narrative choice happening right now.

Agreeing with the narrative like this?! This is such a unique experience for me as a viewer—to feel like I’m on a ride that is at once absolutely wild and incredibly sensible and well-crafted, and to feel simultaneously completely invested and anticipatory and speculative but also totally willing to trust where it goes. I long for Ted and Beard to really talk. I long for Ted and Rebecca to stop missing each other. I long for Roy to have a serious conversation with Ted about what’s happening with him. I long for Keeley to find a vocation, something that drives her beyond her projects. I long for so many things! But I wouldn’t long for them if this show was less good. If the show was less good, I wouldn’t have a wish list a mile long because I wouldn’t be so attuned to the details and potential lurking in every scene. THIS IS SUCH A GOOD SHOW, I CANNOT HANDLE IT, I LOVE IT SO MUCH.

(To that end, a great deal of the Ted Lasso tag and so many Twitter reactions reactions to the show feel super stressful right now and I am kind of just trying not to look?! I love this fandom so much because of the amazing conversations that happen and because of brilliant fic and because there are some awesome people I never would have encountered were it not for this show. That little bubble is wonderful and I’d stay in this fandom no matter what in order to keep experiencing those things. But fans’ catastrophic reactions to every little thing that happens, every little choice a character makes that isn’t the “perfect” choice? The takeaway that the writers—on this show of all shows—wake up in the morning ready for another day of torturing shippers rather than another day of writing a beautiful story they genuinely want to write? I do not enjoy those parts at all. I would like to opt out of those parts. I’m having such a magical experience watching this show and talking about this show and listening about this show and writing about this show with a variety of people who feel all kinds of ways. I truly wish I could somehow transfer the energy of this experience onto all the people who are hating it right now. I don’t mind at all that people are having vastly different reactions to this show and are sharing their honest feelings, including the really angry ones (I can appreciate something and disagree with it!), and I get that sometimes the language of fannish reactions is intentionally, ironically hyperbolic. But there feels like this very serious trend of people legitimately thinking writers on this show are targeting shippers and have lost respect for their characters, and I just feel like an alien from another planet when I see that stuff. I guess I just feel like people make art because they want their art to be visible to other people and to themselves, but that doesn’t typically involve specifically catering to or torturing a subset of that audience?)

I am more fascinated by Sharon Fieldstone than ever before. I have been running through every single action with her and Ted so many times. The confirmation that she’s living in club-provided housing (that could not look more different from Ted’s club-provided flat). Ted clearly noticing the many bottles. Sharon’s face while she tries to casually recycle them. (Sharon could legitimately have a more problematic relationship with alcohol than Ted does, and I find that extremely interesting and am very curious to find out what happens there.) Sharon leaving him voice notes while she’s concussed, probably because she’d been thinking about him shortly before the accident. The way Ted calls her and does all the funny voices and it’s not frustrating like all the times he uses his silliness and allusions to deflect during their prior conversations because this time, those behaviors are just a part of him showing care for another person. The way they stretch each other, and Ted is still wrong about the things he’s been wrong about, but they both grow all the same.

While it is pretty much impossible for me to imagine that this show would include an actual romantic relationship between Ted and Sharon (it would be beyond unethical even if they could write it well, and Sharon in particular is so professional and committed to her work, and it would erase so much of the powerful message about the importance of seeking therapy from a professional who is not your friend or partner, and I would totally hate it), watching this episode was the first moment I had this queasy little feeling that it’s possible that Ted could end up developing really complicated feelings about Sharon since, at this point, he’s been honest with her about things he’s hardly spoken about before and you can really form an attachment to people you feel safe with in a new way. (I mean, I’m sure Michelle knows what happened with Ted’s father, but I’m not even certain if Beard does.) He’s so broken right now, and Sharon is such a great person and so different from anyone else in his life (even though Rebecca is also different, and Beard is also different, and Roy is also different, and so on), that I could see things getting really fuzzy for him. I continue to have faith in the way the storylines on this show are handled. I’m just. Putting this here.

(In saying that, though, I also wanna make it really clear that I don’t just automatically assume anytime a new female character is introduced that they’re going to end up becoming a romantic complication. Like, Phoebe is allowed to have a teacher who is an attractive woman and AFC Richmond is allowed to have a sports psychologist who is an attractive woman and Keeley is allowed to talk to Jamie Tartt without it threatening what she has with Roy and all these people can exist as human beings without the introduction of romantic drama.)

Isaac gives every player one haircut per season, OH MY GOD. The JOY during the haircut scene. YES.

KEELEY AND REBECCA. Their text thread. The affirming video call right before Rebecca goes into the restaurant. The way Keeley sits all snuggled up against Rebecca in her office.

I was pretty thoroughly spoiled for the Sam and Rebecca plot through 2x8, and I was bracing for something far more problematic and tortured than what happens in this episode. The words I would use to describe their scenes: awkward, cute, cringy, and understandable. There are a million reasons why this relationship isn’t sustainable, but I felt completely understanding of both their choices here. This show has a lot of thesis statements, but I keep going back to the idea from 2x1 that there are people who enter your life to help you get to the next point, and I think it’s entirely possible that Sam and Rebecca will mutually be that for each other.

I find comparisons between Rupert and Rebecca super upsetting. There are absolutely meaningful things to say about the irony of ending up in a situation with an uncomfortable resemblance to certain taboo elements of an ex’s situation. But that ex is abusive and manipulative and cruel and Rebecca has exhibited NONE of those behaviors, and it makes me really sad to think that people feel that the writers on this show have betrayed Rebecca in giving her this storyline.

As always, I reserve the right to keep blathering about this show. I’ve had a headache for a couple of days, but my head is also so full of 2x8 thoughts that I couldn’t keep them in even if the circumstances for writing this were not ideal. I kind of hate that I’ve included frustrated fandom thoughts within the analysis of what I felt was an absolutely gorgeous, complicated, heartbreaking, near-perfect episode of television, but if ya can’t be a little dramatic on your own tumblr while you’re feeling raw and under the weather, where can ya?

[noethicalconsumptionunderdisney]

Ranked: Hannah Montana — Jake Ryan Episodes

Here we are at last: Jake Ryan.  I think you all probably could’ve seen this coming, but I had to keep you waiting (and gather my thoughts a bit).  Of Miley’s canon love interests, Jake (Leslie) Ryan is the one that gets the most screentime overall, and happens to be my personal favorite match for her, so it only makes sense to dedicate a Ranked post to him.  As per usual, I’ll be revealing these rankings from Worst->Best, in reverse-order of how much I liked them.

Which brings us to probably the most unambiguous “Worst” ever:

“The End of the Jake As We Know It” (Season Four)

Yeah.  Of all the episodes on this list, this is the only one I actively dislike.  I don’t think this one was too much of a shock to anyone, but let me talk about why anyway:

This is the first and only time Jake shows up in Season 4.  He’s barely shown in Season 3, which we’ll talk about a little more further down, but he really just seems to appear solely to be dragged through the mud, and then unceremoniously shooed out so Miley can ride off into the sunset with Jesse. I don’t even necessarily have a problem with them breaking up.  I wouldn’t be happy about it, but you could at least give a better reason— you’ve done it before!  Twice!  And there’s a perfectly good reason right there in front of them: they’ve been apart for a while, they liked each other as kids, but now that they’re getting older and growing into separate lives, they’re growing apart.  But no, let’s just have him randomly cheat on her, because that’s totally a satisfying conclusion to a multi-season arc.  Calling one of your most beloved recurring characters a dick for 30 minutes is peak comedy, amirite?

This is also the only time in Season 4 that Oliver is actually an important part of an episode? He shows up for like 5 minutes in the Finale, but really, the Season 4 episode where he has the most screentime is this one.  And while there’s nothing wrong with how Oliver is written here, it just makes a little extra mad, because most of his screentime is focused on this dumbass plot development.  I can’t help but think, They brought back my man for this?! on both counts.

But let’s move on to less loathsome episodes, shall we?

“He Could Be The One” (Season Three)

Okay, I might catch some shit for this.  I know. This episode’s very popular.  I am aware of that.  And I don’t actually hate this episode, like with the other one.  I like the song, I like Miley asserting herself to her dad when it comes to her dating life, Lilly and Oliver are on-point (although that does kind of apply to the last episode too), and I even liked most of the interactions between Miley and Jake.  That said, here’s why I’m ranking it so low:

THE ONLY REASON IT EXISTS IS TO SET MILEY UP WITH SOMEONE ELSE.

Everything from the start of the episode to the weird reframing of Miley and Jake’s complicated past to the focus on Miley bonding with someone else, thinking about that someone else when she’s singing to Jake, talking about how she wants to kiss that someone else so badly except for the inconvenient fact that she’s with Jake, to the episode treating them like equivalent options that are just so hard to decide between despite she and Jesse barely knowing each other and having no history outside this episode… every bit of it is designed to make you like the other guy better and root for the other guy.  

And I guess if you haven’t watched the other episodes, or you have but it’s been awhile and you don’t remember them super-well, it’s easier to root for Jesse (ignoring all the problems that he himself has as a character, in this episode, even, but let’s not focus on that right now).  But this show can’t trick me that easily, sorry not sorry.

I “should” like this episode more, given that this is when they get back together, but they could’ve gotten them together differently.  Instead, we have Lilly berating Miley for going back to her ex after she rejects Jesse, we have Miley… tackling Jake?  Did anyone else find that odd?  Funny, yes, but weird as hell, and not really indicative of their dynamic.  And worst of all, we have them completely rewriting history and hoping we don’t notice.  It’s not respectful to list “we have so much history” as a reason to stay with Jake if you can’t be bothered to portray that history accurately.  So before we delve into that history a bit, let me make one thing abundantly clear:

Jake did not break Miley’s heart.  He’s also not the only one who’s ever fucked up or acted immaturely in their relationship. You wouldn’t know it from watching this, but she’s the one who broke up with him the only time they actually did date.  Yeah, it was kind of crappy of him to make her think he was marrying her friend so he could “Gotcha!” her on TV, and it wasn’t great of him to kiss her and then leave in Season 1, but that’s a far cry away from “breaking her heart.”  He literally never did.  The fact that they framed it that way is not only frustrating, but also some gross foreshadowing for what they ultimately did to his character later on.

That said, the way Jake actually is when he’s onscreen (i.e. when you look at how he actually acts and not just how other people are talking about him) is pretty in-character, funny even.  Miley and Jake still have their chemistry and their interactions are amazing apart from that weird tackling thing, and Jake reacting to the cat sweater was something I didn’t know I needed.  So objections aside, I do like this episode.  Just not as much as what’s to come.

“Jake… Another Little Piece of My Heart” (Season Three)

So while my previous entry was largely dedicated to explaining why it was ranked lower, this entry is going to be a defense of sorts, explaining why this episode, yeah might not be the best, but is a lot better than people remember, or at least is one I’m still very fond of.  

In Jake’s last appearance before this, Miley agreed to be “just friends” with him.  Here, we see them following up on that.  She calls him “one of [her] best friends,” and not only that, she shows that she knows him well enough to know why he, of all people, should not be getting married young.  “You change your phone plans every 6 weeks.”  How does she know this?  Because they kept in contact with each other.  They contact each other frequently enough for her to know that he changes his phone plan all the time.  They kept their promise!  They’re exes, yes, and there’s still tension there as we see in the end, but they genuinely do feel like friends, and not just like they’re awkwardly forcing it.

Miley is understandably pissed when he pranks her, but that’s only because she cares so much, and I do think there’s genuine concern there as a friend, even if she very likely was also jealous.  They’re comfortable around each other, they’ve gotten to know each other a lot better, and the hint that there’s still more lingering between them at the end is both promising and open-ended.  They don’t get back together right then… but they show that they could, because those feelings are still there, despite everything.

I wonder, though, if this episode would’ve worked better had it aired earlier.  We get indications that it was filmed earlier than some of the others, namely that scenes from it show up in the Opening Credits for that season, but for whatever reason, it didn’t air until much later.  I’m not sure why, but I do think things could’ve been better had they reintroduced her relationship with Jake (friendship with some lingering feelings) earlier on, had a few more “regular” episodes without him, and then given the two a proper arc later in the season rather than just one episode where they’re like, “We’re back together now!  But I also kind of like this other guy!  Oh no!” and then he’s not there the rest of the season.  But c’est la vie.  

Now onto the good stuff:

“Good Golly, Miss Dolly” (Season One)

Honestly, the way the entire Season 1 arc unfolds with them is so natural and beautifully done, I almost don’t feel like it’s fair to dissect them individually and split them up based on personal favorites, because they work best in order and as a unit. But I still have my opinions.

I’ve expressed previously why I love Dolly Parton’s appearance here and why she kills it, but in terms of Miley’s development with Jake, this one remains the most stagnant and frustrating. Painfully realistic, of course, and very in-character for everyone, but of all the Season 1 Jake episodes, this is the one that has the least Jake in it?  Which is not really why I’m ranking it lower, but it does put their dynamic into generic ���girl clearly likes guy but is too proud and scared to admit her feelings” territory.  Which is necessary for their story to develop, but isn’t as fun as the episodes where we actually see why she hasn’t been “falling all over him” up to this point (meaning, her aversion to his personality).  And we pretty much end the episode right where we started: once again, Miley’s pining over him, wants to express her feelings for him, but feels like she can’t… only now she’s got a more solid reason not to.

“More Than A Zombie To Me” (Season One)

I was torn at first between this one and the Dolly one, but I ranked this one higher for a few reasons. For one, the storyline is a bit more complex and nuanced.  Lilly teases Miley for being in denial of her feelings for Jake, Miley rejects him when he asks her out… but then Hannah Montana has to kiss him.  She makes a case for why she shouldn’t have to kiss him… only to realize she wanted to when they actually listen to her.  Jake respects her “no” and asks someone else… only for her to realize she wanted him after all.  Miley fights with Lilly for Jake’s affections… only for her to realize that her friendship with Lilly is more important than whether or not she “gets the guy.”  

Beat for beat, Miley is always one step behind, not because she’s stupid, but because she has too much pride to see what’s right in front of her, to acknowledge her own feelings.  It’s not the most pleasant characterization for Miley, but it is very telling characterization, and it paints an interesting picture of her and her relationships to both Jake and Lilly— that she genuinely wants to mean what she says and say what she means, but her pride makes it harder for her to figure out what she actually wants.  She genuinely wants to be a decent, down-to-earth person, but sometimes she’s too self-centered to realize how she’s coming off and how she might be hurting others.

What’s most interesting here, though, is Lilly’s characterization and development in the Jake arc.  In this episode and the one before it, she’s among the girls who are “falling all over” Jake, even continuing to say “Sup” to him because he said it to her once like it’s their “special thing.”  She alternates between starstruck awe over Jake and amusement over Miley’s aversion to him, teasing Miley that she may be protesting too much, and shamelessly drooling all over him to Miley’s annoyance.  After this episode, we see her being the supportive friend and #1 Shipper On Deck for Jake and Miley… then firmly against Jake and Miley together after they break up the first time, and from that point on, genuinely over Jake and wanting what’s best for her best friend.  

But this episode… this is where we see the switch.  This is where we see Lilly giving Miley a fair shot, then taking Jake for herself when the opportunity presents itself.  This is where we see her doing something for herself for once and going beyond that “best friend” role… only to realize it’s not meant to be. That Jake only ever had eyes for Miley. That she was the canned fruit cup he settled for after all.  It’s painful and heartbreaking, and perhaps a less strong friendship wouldn’t be able to withstand it, but theirs does.  Because Lilly does.  Because Lilly knows that whatever Miley says, being with Jake would make her happy, and Jake wants Miley more than anyone else.  And she’s willing to do whatever it takes to help them be happy together… even if it means she doesn’t get the guy herself.  I think Lilly’s role in all this is so underrated, and she deserves massive credit for the maturity and development she displays here.

And of course, we have more characterization for Jake, where he’s… very much himself, but also better than Miley initially gives him credit for.  Yeah, he’s still hiding behind his ego and bravado, and he does initially say Miley must’ve been nervous to reject him when he asks her out a second time on the beach, but we also see him accepting that she doesn’t like him back (or so he thinks).  We see that he’s sweet to Hannah as a coworker, and then he confides in her that he likes Miley because she’s “cute, funny, smart, down-to-earth,” and because she sees him as a person, not as a superstar. I do think “moving on” from Miley by asking out her best friend, right in front of her, is kind of a dick move (or possibly a jealousy play), and he could’ve made a little more of an effort to be loyal to Lilly as she was his date, rather than being so obvious that he preferred Miley, but overall, I think this is a good episode for developing Jake as someone with hidden depths, and someone Miley could realistically fall for.  

(Also, the subplot is comedy gold from start to finish.)

“People Who Use People” (Season One)

Their first kiss! Yeah, there’s no getting around it: this one’s amazing.  Their banter is just on point from beginning to end.  We have a continuation of Jake and Hannah’s pleasant costar relationship, a continuation of Miley’s ever-more-obvious feelings for Jake, and we have a culmination of the tension between the two in an incredible scene. Once again, this does one of my favorite things: it turns the narrative on its head.  We know Miley used Willis to make Jake jealous, but now it’s revealed that Jake was doing the same thing with Holly all along.

“Holly?  She’s not my girlfriend.  We have a movie coming out, so we’ve been hanging out, it’s a publicity thing.”

“Why didn’t you tell me that before?!”

“Uhhh… well…  I-I think I—”

“Wait a minute, I know why.  Because you were trying to make me jealous.”

“Was not.”

“Was too.  Admit it, Jake, you like me.”

“No, you like me, just say it.”

“No, you say it!”

“No, you!”

“No, you!”

*cue Big Damn Kiss*

They spar with each other like this all episode, meeting each other on the same level beat for beat. And Lilly eating popcorn in the background and falling off her chair?  Let’s not lie to ourselves, we were all Lilly in this moment.  Ultimately, this isn’t the story of “how they got together,” because Jake leaves for a movie, but even that makes some sense.  He feels good that he got to kiss her before he left and doesn’t have to wonder what it would’ve been like, she feels angry that he kissed her when he knew he’d be leaving soon, and ultimately his acting career comes before him having a normal life, as it always sort of has, which unfortunately means it also has to come before Miley.  But once again, we have an open ending, a clear “not now” rather than a “never,” and a question to be potentially answered in the future: Will They, Might They, and Would It Work Out?  And of course, what’s next?

But before we get into that, let’s talk about where it all began:

#3: “New Kid in School” (Season One)

Who doesn’t love a good First Meeting, especially one that starts off with two prospective lovers starting off on the wrong foot?  What I love about them starting off on the wrong foot here, though, is that it’s not really due to misunderstandings.  On the contrary, Miley is the only person who knows exactly what’s going on— even better than Jake does, I’d argue, because he doesn’t even realize how arrogant he comes across, and Miley’s the only one willing to call him out on it.

This isn’t even particularly a shippy episode, apart from “Also, he thinks I’m cute, not that I care,” but I’d argue it’s better because it establishes them as characters first, and as Foils.  Both of them are celebrities attending normal school and who, in theory, want to be treated like normal kids, but while Jake talks the talk and still gets everything he wants, Miley walks the walk and has to lose her celebrity privileges in exchange for peace and privacy.  It’s understandable that Miley feels she’s gotten the short end of the stick, and it’s only later, after she’s opened her big mouth of course, when Jake confides in her that sometimes he really does wish he could be normal, it’s only then that she realizes she’s the lucky one.  

But of course it’s not too late for her, it’s too early in the show for that!  So we see her family coming together in this hilarious scene where they pretend they’re all crazy celebrity-impersonators.  As a side note, I like to think they didn’t buy the Elvis costume for this, but that Jackson just had it lying around already and was itching for an excuse to use it.  (Maybe he was Elvis for a previous Halloween, idk.)

In any case, the reason I rank this higher is that even though it doesn’t show that Miley and Jake like each other all that much, it shows why they could like each other, which in my opinion is more important.  I mean, ideally, you’d have both, but this does a good job of introducing Jake as someone who seems like just another egotistical celebrity Miley can’t stand, but underneath that, is someone who just might understand what she goes through better than anyone, and Miley is the perfect person to understand him right back.  

#2: “That’s What Friends Are For?” (Season Two)

The return of not one, but two iconic guest stars in the best and worst way: together.  Months after their breakup, Miley finds Jake at her doorstep after sparring with Mikayla, and is sure he’s only there to get her back… but he just wants to be friends.  Great!  Good, no drama!  That’s exactly what she wanted… right?

Even better, he invites her on the set of a talk show so he can reveal his new movie… and his new costar, her archrival Mikayla.  The worst part is, he chose Mikayla out of courtesy.  He doesn’t know Hannah and Mikayla hate each other, because they act friendly when they’re on-camera.  He did it because he values his relationship with Miley, and doesn’t want to ruin their friendship by inviting her to play his love interest.  And Miley… well, we all know Miley isn’t as okay with this as she pretends to be, and it only becomes more apparent as the episode goes on.

What I love about this is the role reversal this puts them in.  For once, Jake is the one being mature, and Miley is the one that needs to apologize and grow, and admits it.  It’s framed that way and everything.  It’s almost bittersweet to watch, because this was such a good step for them, and probably the most mature episode involving the two. To see them go backwards in development after this, to see Jake be raked through the coals by the writers, all that good will between them forgotten and retconned and burned to hell later on, there’s just something very bitterly tragic about it.  This episode was so important for them, not just as a relationship, but as people, and I wish that good will they had towards each other had remained and gotten a proper follow-up.

Of course, this was itself an excellent follow-up to…

#1: “Achy Jakey Heart” (Season Two)

Was it ever even a question? Jake Ryan returns in glorious fashion: falling from the sky, in a tux, down on one knee begging Miley’s forgiveness, with chocolates from the sky.  Say what you will, that man knows his way around a Big Romantic Gesture.  And he doesn’t stop there: muffins, “Jake steak,” a cardboard cutout, and barging in the front door in a literal knight costume, he asks what more he can do.   More importantly, he says, “You’ve dumped stuff on me, and you’ve yelled at me.  The one thing you haven’t done is tell me you don’t care about me.  Tell me that, and I’ll go away.”  Even after all this, he’s willing to respect her if the answer is “no.”  He just wants to make sure it’s “no” because she doesn’t want him, and not because she doesn’t believe he cares for her.  He does care for her, and he’s willing to do whatever it takes to prove it.  

He gets tested for this pretty much right away, fails in private, and then passes in public when Miley least expects him to.  After telling Miley he can’t take her to a movie premiere because he’s pretending to date his costar, he rejects his costar on live TV to confess his love for Miley.  He doesn’t do it expecting her to come back, rather, he admits his fault and accepts that for him, there’s no happy ending.  And Miley responds in the best way possible, showing up with a “Who says real life doesn’t have happy endings?” and a Big Damn Kiss of her own.

This is also when they confide in each other.  Jake tells her his real name is Leslie, and Miley tells him she’s Hannah Montana.  They’re vulnerable with each other for the first time in their relationship, and they understand each other better than ever. Unfortunately, it’s understanding, or lack thereof, that also leads to their demise.  

Jake wants to be a normal guy, or at least he thinks he does.  Miley feels to a certain extent that she is a normal girl, just a normal girl who happened to get famous.  And that disconnect, that difference hurts them.  Miley realizes that Jake doesn’t actually know what it’s like to be normal, and having to be with someone who can’t handle one night of it, as well as the pressure of being famous as Miley too, is what finally cracks them open.  I will say she could’ve handled it a lot better, and good on Jake for calling her out on her lack of communication, but in the end, their relationship is left with a mutual understanding: that Jake respects her secret, listened to what she had to say, and wants to improve.  Not so that he can get her back, but so that he can be “worthy of someone as terrific as” her.  

This also has ONE OF THE BEST SUBPLOTS OF ALL TIME.  Cheese jerky?  Capitalist commentary?  Jackson rolling in money and Rico being mad about it? Oliver and Jackson doing a rap together? Are you not entertained?  Like its main plot, this does end up reverting to the status quo by the end, but it’s done in a way that’s both crushingly realistic and brutally hilarious.  Overall, this episode?  One for the ages.

So there it is— every Jake Ryan episode, ranked.  I have a whole ton more I could say about Jake Ryan, Miley Stewart, and their overall dynamic (and probably will, this week lol nope), but I feel like this is a decent start that outlines my opinions in quite a bit of detail.  While not a perfect couple by any means, they sure as hell made the screen a lot more interesting.  And hey, the course of true love never did run smooth, why should they be any different?

[v-poreons]

kova's backstory is so sad, like I knew it was sad but reading that still :((( anyways more kova lore bc I'm invested

I can talk about the campaign he was in then! :))

I'm so mad Tumblr deleted everything I wrote hold on while I try to fix this

Basically what I said before was so fucking long I simply can't rewrite it in as comprehensive a way i did before so this is gonna be a lot shorter I'm PISSED.

I don't remember everything that happened in the campaign because it was four years ago but the party was me as Kova, Asher (Wood Elf Ranger), Lan (Changeling ((in the form of a High Elf)) Fighter), Mislia (Tiefling Sorcerer), and Savory (Tiefling Monk, we had an inside joke that Kova spells her name Savoury).

We were on a job delivering some stuff from one town to another I believe when we were attacked by some goblins who we beat the absolute shit out of. Lan was checking one of the goblins when she found a ring with an eye symbol engraved on it. She put it on and it latched itself to her finger and shot a beam of light into the woods, presumably for us to follow. We hid our wagon and set up camp in a cave for the night. I don't remember who was on watch but we were ambushed by some Dark Elves who took us to the Underdark to their queen who welcomed us and decided to throw a party in our honor.

We were all varying degrees of intoxicated but Kova, who was nursing his first cup of ale since he hates drinking since it inhibits his reasoning skills and he was a little wary of the whole thing. Lan also was suspicious so the two chatted for a bit and planned to do some investigating together later. When we had been escorted to our rooms we found out that we had been magically locked in so we found a way to bypass the spell and sneaked out with the rest of the party, but we were caught and taken into the throne room where the queen revealed she had led us here for a reason. She activated a big rune on the floor and we all blacked out. Then when we woke up our skin was translucent and you could see our skeletons under our skin because plot twist we were dead and had been sent to the underworld (the reveal slapped so hard david if ur seeing this u popped off so hard)

We ended up having to do like a gladiator type match where Kova and Lan created the legendary knife cube combo (Kova casts cloud of daggers Lan throws enemies into the cube and theyre promptly turned into bad guy soup). We won and were brought before Hades and Persephone (Kova and Savory charmed her because they're both nice :) ) and then we were thrown in prison because Hades had a stick up his ass.

We met Brutus and Milquetoast in jail and decided to do a prison break I'm not sure exactly how it went but it involved the warden and a prison riot and Lan killed the warden and was inexplicably drawn to this dark spooky hallway which supposedly held Thanatos but when she reached the end of the corridor all that was there were empty chains.

We had a sick ass chariot race with Hades and Lan flipped him the bird as we escaped down a big cavernous hole in the ground. We woke up at the bottom and learned if we wanted out we each had to go through trials to judge our characters.

I don't remember the exact order we went in but Mislia's was a fight with their ex wife and ended with them choosing Savory's life over the ex, Savory's took place in her old monastery which she had been banned from, Asher's was a puzzle that ended in a fight with his former friend and leader (who happened to be his player's other character from a different campaign remember this it's important), and Lan's (which was the last trial and also the last session since we unfortunately didn't finish the campaign) took place in her childhood hometown but everyone but her had lost their memories and she had to convince us all to come with her and get our memories back.

Kova's was a quiz show type trial during which we would gain or lose things (body parts, knowledge/memories, items, etc.) The trouble with playing a character who's smarter than you is when ur DM asks you what the components are to an X level Wizard spell (something Kova would probably know but I sure as hell didn't) you end up spinning the bad wheel (a la taz suffering game) and losing Kova's harmonica which was a gift from his dead friends dead daughter. Also it got turned to ash :)

The game show host ended up being Medusa and we killed the hell out of her and Lan and Kova struck the final blows.

I ended up asking the DM what the campaign would have gone like from the last session and he said the twist would have been that Brutus was Thanatos and I don't remember how but he could not longer continue being Thanatos so Lan, who had the ring, would be given the choice to become the new god of death or not.

From there we have two endings:

The 'canon' ending, in which Lan accepts her role and remains in the underworld while the rest of the living party members return to their lives. Kova is alone and lonely returning to his travels but has healed somewhat and learns to accept people into his heart again.

In the ending where Lan refuses, the party returns to the living world and parts ways. Lan and Kova reluctantly separate since Kova wishes to keep traveling and seeing the world but Lan is exhausted by everything that has happened in her life up until this point and just wants to settle down. The two visit from time to time but reminisce on their past and wonder how they could have remained close and developed their relationship (art in the video is drawn by Lan's player lil.bunny.prince on Instagram)

In both endings (and here's where you remember that importance regarding Asher's trial), because the story has established that it takes place in the same world as another campaign, Kova meets

Gwyn, and becomes a father figure to her and essentially adopts her. They're perfect for each other. Gwyn was cast from her clan and disowned by her family, and now she finally has a solid adult figure in her life who loves and accepts her and helps her overcome her fears of rejection and accidentally hurting the people she cares about. Kova has lost so much and with Gwyn he is able to raise her like he would have helped raise Iris and learns to overcome his survivors guilt and both of their scars and trauma heal together I love them so much.

Kova does outlive Gwyn by a couple hundred years (damn dnd lifespans) and whichever direction his life goes his endings are always bittersweet but he is able to heal despite always feeling a little sad and when he gets older he settles in a nice town and owns a library. And obviously his canon storyline isn't sad enough so I have aus for that (villain au my beloved). ❤

[lilyginnyblackv2]

Okay, so I've been watching / catching up with Ducktales (reboot series). I'm watching it over on Disney+, so I'm all caught up over there (but am still waiting to watch the third season, which is still ongoing). Even though I'm not totally 100% caught up, I wanted to talk about how it does certain things so well, especially in comparison to HNY, which I dropped a few weeks ago (not only because of a certain pairing, but also because the writing was just a straight up mess).

This gets super long, so I’m putting it under a Read More:

While DT is a reboot of an older franchise and HNY is a sequel series, they both have a similar situation going on with appealing to both older and newer fans and working with preestablished characters, etc. Both series also aim to have the kid characters the focus of the series, but the mystery aspects surrounding past events and villains that are connected to the adult characters in the series. DT does this very well, by properly interlacing the children's storylines and the adult storylines. They use the storytelling method of overarching plotlines with monster of the week episodes, but the reason why this method works with DT as opposed to HNY, where it is failing, is because of execution and utilization.

We see with HNY that they don't properly establish things, too many aspects are kept vague. This is likely due to the combination of Takashashi-sensei's request that the girls be the main characters (not the parents) and the whole issue with a certain pairing. In order to keep the viewers watching, they decided to keep things vague. What this ended up resulting in though, was general confusion, and rather than making the mystery elements *a part of* the story, it made the mysteries *the story*. This, then, lead to the issue of mysteries existing for the sake of mysteries and the series not being able to set up solid foundations for their characters to grow from.

In contrast, DT establishes family relationships, character personality traits (which I will talk about in a moment), and other basic world, plot, and character building aspects. Even though DT has an already existing series that was beloved by many growing up, this new reboot series is a bit different from the original, and they make sure to RE-establish the characters, setting, and so forth. This makes the series accessible to both old *and* new fans. It's been stated that HNY was created with the intention that it would be a story that old and new fans could enjoy, but the series uses IY as a crutch for writing - a sort of shortcut, with them relying on fan's knowledge of the previous series to do some of the heavy lifting when it comes to world, plot, and character building.

This sometimes leads to the mysteries in-series, not matching up with the questions and mysteries of the watchers (out-of-series), and that results in confusion. Also, because of this approach, we end up getting very shallow character insight and growth. They don't take the time to use the Monster of the Week episodes to show deep emotional bonding or growth of the characters, but rather shallow, surface level examples of this. That and the fact that they waste time on that little recap bit at the start of each episode limits the amount of growth the characters can go through and experience. The need to keep everything vague also causes there to be an odd gap between the underlying mysteries of the series, which are connected pretty much solely through the OG and parent characters, and the main MCs of the series (the kids).

In DT we get two underlying main mysteries, one gets heavily connected to the kids through a new friend (similar in a way to Riku in HNY), but this is utilized really well. We get strong friendship building and there are proper emotional payoffs. This main mystery is solved and brought to light by the end of Season One, while the other main mystery, pertaining to a missing parent, is held off for the next season. Though there was some significant discoveries made for it in Season One. The Monster of the Week episodes also contain smaller mysteries or mishaps that are fixed by the end of the series, but they also allow for character development to carry through. In HNY it seems like whatever happens in the series is just...completely forgotten by the next episode, even moments of character growth and development. This makes every episode feel very disconjointed. With DT there is consistency with these moments and details, so even the Monster of the Week episodes feel consistent with the series overall. It's also made very clear when an episode is being Monster of the Week and when it is being plot focused, because the mysteries are set up very clearly (and are limited to two per season, or so it seems so far) and what characters are antagonistic or villains, as well as their driving forces and motives, are made clear (even when the characters are more morally grey ones).

HNY lacks all of that. Also, the way it is approaching the mysteries surrounding the parents make those mysteries feel very "end all and be all." What I mean by that is, after those mysteries are solved...where will the series go from there? Likely nowhere, which is why we are getting so much dragging out with the series. When the series drags out like this, it makes it seem like there is a lot of story to tell, a lot of places to go, but when you look closely...there just isn't. The series is so focused on dragging out the mystery that it isn't doing enough to establish other aspects of the series that can then allow for "what comes after." In DT the "missing parent" based mystery gets solved around the mid-way point of Season Two. From that point on, we get the "what comes after" and there are so many things that were properly established that could make that work. Because there were other, parental like relationships, that were established with the MCs before their missing parent returned, so the awkward "where do I fit in" elements could be properly explored.

All of the above has been largely plot and world building/setting focused commentary. So now lets take a look at the characters and how the two series handle them. HNY has twins as the main characters with a cousin as a third main character. In similar vein, DT has the three triples as main characters, with the granddaughter of the family maid, who ends up becoming like family. The series explores some romance elements with the older, adult characters, but since the MCs are kids, romance isn't really explored for them. Just friendship and family. This is made clear throughout the series and by the creators. We also see characters that share similar traits as the adults that helped raise them, but their personalities aren't just cardboard copies (unlike in HNY). The children question things, they explore, they show interest and want to know about the mysteries and things that are being hidden from them. Meanwhile, in HNY, the MCs don't care and don't ask questions. They just let the plot pass them by and passively engage in it.

We also see in DT that the triplets are all interested in what happened to their missing parent, even though they had loving family members who also helped raise them. A lot of people try to argue that the reason the girls in HNY don't care is because they were raised by others, but here is a series showing how that doesn't necessarily need to be the case and can still work. In fact, in DT we see that each other triplets has a different level of investment and adjustment to the mystery and reveals, etc. Like real people. This also allows for natural conflict, natural growth, and natural engagement from the viewers. HNY doesn't even try with this.

They also don't really try to have anyone but the twins have truly meaningful growth and development (and even with the twins it is shaky). The cousin character is treated as nothing but comedic relief with one or two shallow moments of reflection/depth. And so many of the OG adult characters are just used as info dump characters. Compare that to DT where the maid's granddaughter is often used for comedic relief (like others in the series), but isn't just tossed to the side. She may be one of the lesser main characters, but she is still given an emotionally compelling plotline. The adult characters all have their own moments of growth and development too, and they have their own quirks, storylines, and histories. They exist as companions to the story, not just plot devices. They are their own characters in their own right.

Putting all of this together makes DT shine and it also makes the issues with HNY stand out even more in contrast. Sorry for the out of nowhere comparison between the two series, but I was thinking about all of these things when I was catching up on DT. The two series are on totally different levels and they are both "kid" aimed series that are aiming for both new and old, young and old, fans. So if one series can do it, so can the other. But it's sadly too late for HNY now.

[jumin-deserves-better]

My thoughts on all the Mystic messenger characters and their routes :

Ok, last week I finished playing the mystic messenger game. I completed all the routes, DLCs etc. And, OMG, WHAT A RIDE WAS THAT ! . It doesn't have any appealing plot like other otome games, but this game sure did capture my heart,which most of the otome games fail to do so. The fact I could relate to some of the characters, I felt bad for them, concerned, weirded out at times , and so happy when they changed into a happy person because of me. The game deserves all the praise it gets, 10/10 👍

In this post, I will give my rating based on my playthrough for each character, and I will also say who is my true route as well, i.e, the route I fell in love the most, And please remember, these are based on MY opinions alone, please don't come at me, if it doesn't match yours 👀, Feel free to share your opinions about the characters as well & this post is way long beware ~☆

My playthrough order : I followed the recommended playthrough to get a clear picture of the storyline.

Zen 》Yoosung》 Jaehee》 Jumin 》 Seven》 V 》 Ray.

And for your kind information, I never played this game to get a bad ending, i didn't want to hurt those precious fictional characters just for getting one CG 🤐, but I do know what happens

SPOILER FREE!, I will be just giving MY OWN ratings , except for the rika part lol don't worry, ladies.!

Anyways, let's just jump into it ;),

Zen 🤍:

THAT SMIRK THOUGH 😏

His route : 9/10 ( not the best route, but I liked it anyways, as he is my 1st route)

His character: 8/10 ( I don't like narcissism or narcissistic people, I know it was his coping mechanism, but I kind of dislike those type of men, his attitude in Jumin's route, kinda pissed me off apart from that , he is great ! )

Is he my true route ? : NO, I don't like guys who are narcissistic, I understand that that its was his coping mechanism, to make him believe in himself, but still being narcissistic all the time is not ok, I have a bad memory because of those type of guys, moreover, I am not that confident irl 😂 , I mean the MC in Zen's route,will have to say lots of weird ass choices, and the fact that will impress him⁉️, i wouldn't even say those choices irl to anyone . I wouldn't mind being friends with him though. He is definitely the ideal BF material, but he is just isn't for me..Sorry, Zen.😅

Yoosung 💚 :

AWW CUTIE 🥺💕

His route : 9/10 ( apart from the "You are just like Rika", I personally enjoyed his route, the character development was the best at the end 👌)

His character : 9/10 (OMG! He is just so cute, I am not the one to get attracted to the 'younger guy' type, but this guy just changed everything for me, but he needs lots of attention , beware, yandere yoosungs will pop out if u don't care about him enough, and the fact this guy was the only one who was supportive for Jumin's relationship with MC in Jumin's route , showed how much of a cutie he is!, unlike others 😒, he was a bit annoying in V's route, but it is understandable, he deserves to knw the truth about the person who he admires )

Is he my true route ? : Kind of a YES & a NO. Eventhough I enjoyed his route more than Zen, like I said earlier I am not into those 'younger guy' type, he is a guy who loves to be babied and protected by a mature MC , and well...I am not that mature either 😛,in reality, I am a independent person, but when it comes to relationships, i liked to be babied 😏. I personally think he deserves someone better than me, I don't want to ruin his happiness 🥺

Jaehee 🤎 :

A friend in need is a friend indeed, my bae,Jaehee! 😄

Her route : 7/10 ( ok, I am gonna be honest here, I did not enjoy her route, I was happy that she realized her dreams and goes for it, but do we have to ruin a character just for making this route dramatic? Yes, I am talking about Jumin, Do u guys even know, how much I struggled to even start Jumin's route, I was literally scared of him because of his potrayal in this route as that jerk which he was btw,this route actually made me avoid Jumin for sometime.I expected the relationship between Jumin and Jaehee to become a healthy one, but oh well, whatever, & the after ending was just frustrating,all the RFA members just isolated Jumin, seriously, eventhough he did wrong things ,I felt so bad for him, imagine his thoughts at that moment , ugh...Jaehee deserves a better route, I am just not a fan of 'downgrading one character to give more importance to the main one', it's just bad writing)

Her character : 8/10 ( she is an amazing friend, a bit mature one at that. But personally i felt , if she really wanted to pursue her dreams ,she could have resigned, if she is not liking it . She was behaving a bit ignorant at times, especially in Zen's route. She could have communicated with Jumin beforehand about her difficulty in handling the job? I knw it's very difficult to suddenly quit the job, but she has every right to resign,she does have the money to open a coffee shop, thn why?. Don't come at me, and tell me that I hate her just because she is a female character,HELL NO, I like her but still her route made me have mixed feelings. She was being rude at times , I really understood why CHERTIZ did this, to show women can liberate themselves to work for their dreams, but in a professional point of view, I still think the route could have been handled better. Small businesses success isn't as easy to get, and in my point of view it would have been nice to show how MC and Jaehee make it through in her route rather than making Jumin a jerk, because it ruined Jumin at first for not only me but also a number of players ,but oh well,🏃‍♀️, I do like her, she could be a great friend, nothing more that that )

Is she my true route? : NO, I am straight. I see Jaehee as a friend. Some ask a romantic route for her, but I don't mind about that , I was just glad that I could help her to realize her dreams as a FRIEND.

Jumin 💜 :

I don't see a selfish jerk here, I see a soft boi , in a gigantic body, who is just lonely

His route : 10/10 ( Seriously, I did not expect to like his route one bit, I thought I would hate him more, but turns out, I freaking fell in love with the flawed "him" , HECK YEAH! this was the only route where i was being TRUE TO MYSELF, did not refer any guides, understood his loneliness, I could relate to him so bad, I was happy to help him during his vulnerable times 🤧.Zen was annoying ,but I didn't care much about it, because I knw why he was like this. I prefer the good ending, and yes he does propose for marriage to whom he have talked for only 11 days, but I was very sure he will listen to you, if u don't want the marriage immediately )

His character : 9/10 ( He is so cute in his own way,mature, intelligent,awkward and even gets insecure,because he thinks he does not deserve you?! , you deserve better than me ,Jumin 😫, he does get possessive and irrational and that could make others uncomfortable, but for me, I understood that as well, being an empath myself ,as this dude never had a relationship with anyone,he is new into this, I don't mind teaching him new things about the world, about love. His characterization in Jaehee's route was god awful and cheritz did a bad job in it , I think they decided to make him like this, just for DRAMA,Jumin might have a bad way of showing emotions but he is not a soul less demon. I have seen people calling Jumin an abuser, but I didn't see that at all, he was being an idiot and he acknowledges it, every damn time, an abuser doesn't do this at all, and no..I don't think Jumin is dominant daddy material one bit like how the fandom perceives him. This is his first relationship with a woman, I feel he would be sweet, embarrassed loving and a loyal husband material, and I love his "opposed to living together before marriage" thing as well, as my religion follows that too as well )

Is he my true route? : A. BIG. FAT. YES. HE IS JUST MY TYPE, dear lord. I have never seen someone so perfect and also with flaws just like me , this guy made me realize that all along, I just never showed empathy towards others and that's why no one wanted to talk to me irl, I didn't care what people told about me. He seriously made me understand my own flaws and I corrected it, he made me into a better person, big thx , Mr.Jumin . Morever , I was being myself in his route only, I loved all of his calls , he brings up the strangest things just to talk to you, that's just so cute WTH , this man will be so loyal I am sure of it !.I don't really care about his riches, I am just in love with his true self 😫🥺

707 ❤ :

The main man of this game, hmmm....

His route : 7/10 ( ok, I was so hyped to play his route , cuz even before I started to play this game, 707 was so popular, I expected a lot, but it was a meh for me...he did have a VERY HEARTBREAKING PAST , he was suffering from a lot of things, I understand. But the whole route wasn't that gud though...and his secret endings are just painfully depressing and angsty, V's death just broke my heart, I felt so frickin bad for Jumin, how would he even handle those things?.It just destroyed me completely. Moreover I don't find 707's jokes funny at times, his route had good plot, but 707 failed to impress me in his own route)

His character : 7/ 10 ( oh boi,I am scared that I would be slaughtered with hatred for telling this, the fact that he was faking his own personality was very shocking to me, I did not expect that. I despise tsunderes ,and 707 is the literal definition of it, so yeah, It ended up being annoying for me. Even though I was hella depressed like 707 before, I couldn't find him #relatable at all. I don't knw why , but I couldn't see him more than a friend 🚶‍♀️)

Is he my true route? : NOPE. I was not impressed by him at all, don't knw why lol, I tried to like him as he is THE REAL TRUE ROUTE,but it is still not getting into my heart, maybe because I already started to love Jumin, idk. I felt bad for 707, I wouldn't mind helping him as a friend, but as a significant other...NAH....,I am not into these type of guys 🥴,sorry seven...

V 💙 :

I can understand why Jumin and V were best friends...they be looking like DADDY 👀

His route : 8 /10 ( for me, I was happy that V finally understood that he was basically a obsessive simp for Rika, I hated that he blamed himself more, which somehow I agree, I feel like he could have said something to the RFA , yoosung was hella annoying in this route, he spoke as if Rika is an angel or something, which she is not btw, yoosung, she brainwashed saeran and freakin created a cult, and this is not something an angel would do 🥴, V is not just flawed or anything,he doesn't even love himself,and so clings to rika because she was so wonderful in her eyes as an idea .He kept the freakin truth hidden,just because Rika doesn't want to, of course, my baby,yoosung will ask about . V is too emotional,and he was a victim of rika's abuse and manipulation just like Saeran,I liked the plot and though I didn't fall in love with him , I did have a tinsy bit of crush on him, mainly because of his looks, more like a puppy love, the voice acting was on point 👌)

His character : 7/ 10 ( boi could have handled the situation with his crazy GF much better, he actually let Saeran get brainwashed by Rika, he could have done something, and the fact that he liked Rika only as an idea, showed that this guy was in a very toxic relationship, Rika and V are the perfect example of what happens when two people who doesn't love themselves date, and he was clearly the victim of Rika's abuse and manipulation. I also don't think he is an angel either, he has done some wrong things definitely, and the fandom should acknowledge his wrong doings)

Is he my true route? : NO. Though Jumin and V are very similar , I did not like the fact that he simped for his crazy GF out of his obsession alone and though, she was clearly showing red flags earlier, he thinks that the power of love can change her lol . He was so confusing for me to understand. 😂

Ray 💖 :

His route : 10/10 ( The drama , the music, the plot & the voice acting was just fantastic, I was blown away by this route, but that doesn't mean I liked Saeran as a character, the boi needs therapy, not romance lol, sry,and the recovery from his brainwashed state was unrealistic )

His character : 7/10 ( seriously, the voice acting for both the personalities was just mind blowing, he is such a well written character, but his abandonment issues isn't something u should romanticize about, he loved the affection that the MC was giving , but one wrong move, he will change just like that , he confused affection with love. Some are telling that Jumin was abusive, which he is not btw , for me, suit Saeran was super abusive, WTH)

Is he my true route ? : HELL NO. Eventhough he was practically innocent because he was under the influence of that elixir or some kind of a drug and brainwashed by Rika , I would never in my life try to have a romantic relationship with those kind of people. I may like him after he receives proper therapy ,but NO, just No, I can help him as a person, but I wouldn't go for a kiss or something with him. 🙄

Rika 💔:

This scene still gives me goosebumps 🙄

Her character : -infinity / 20 ( she deserves this uwu)

SPOILERS AHEAD!

Ok, hear me out, I hate Rika so much , i know she has been through a lot, i really do.. but it doesn't mean you can emotionally abuse and brainwash Saeran, he would have been a better person,she turned a person who loves ice cream and cloud watching into a self destructive psycho, another story showed how much she is capable of by her words , She manipulated V to not tell RFA that she is gonna start a cult, WHAT THE HELL, V, do you not knw what she is trying to do here 😳 ? But whatever,V was being manipulated by her "playing as a victim" tactics, she also played with Jumin's feelings for her, I was about to throw my hands on her, how dare u do that to my man ??, made yoosung to obsess over her to make him think that she is absolutely a gud person, and left him to ponder over her so called 'passing' , making him unable to move on from her.

And oh god,the backstory did not make me feel bad for her one bit, it only made me understand why she has become like this. Like dude, I understood she had a shitty past, but so did the other members of RFA, but did they all become like a manipulative victim player? Hell no.. they learned from their mistakes and they change, but even when all the members were trying to help her, she denies that she doesn't need a therapy. She deserves a proper mental therapy and a proper jail time. NO EXCUSE FOR THAT, she did the same manipulation and brainwashing for all of her disciples to get them into Mint eye.

But as a character , Rika just rocked it for me , she was so successful in making me and a lot of the fans hate her as an antagonist. Her voice actor was so gud,she had such a good way of speaking manipulative, like God, I understood why all the RFA members were all kind of whipped for her, she is such a master piece as an antagonist. 🚶‍♀️🤫

Vanderwood 💞👀 :

I NEED A VANDERWOOD ROUTE 😫

His character: 10/10 idk, why am I giving a rating for him though? I just love him 😂

Ok, I know he is a side character, but for some reason, I liked him more than 707 lol 👀, I just spoke with him only in one chatroom , but boi , was I whipped for him 😜

*******************************************

My favourite to least MM main characters and routes :

JUMIN - 19/20 ( 1st)

YOOSUNG - 18/20 (2nd)

ZEN & RAY - 17/ 20 ( 3rd)

V & JAEHEE - 15 / 20 ( 4th )

707 - 14 / 20 ( 5th, it's not that I hate him or something, it's just that I was neither IMPRESSED by his character nor the route, I don't mind him one bit! )

Rika -Though she doesn't have a route or a gud character she deserves a -infinity/20 ( and no place in my heart 🚶‍♀️)

Overall, this game is the best otome game ! , I actually paid for getting the hourglasses, I mean, I suck at patience, I was so intrigued by the story, but it was seriously worth it !. There are a number of otome games which charge more than this.

Anyways,

Thank you, Cheritz for creating Mystic messenger. This game totally changed how I perceived life, love ❤ and Romance 💕

[tabloidtoc]

Star, May 3

You can buy a brand new copy of this issue without the mailing label for your very own at my eBay store: https://www.ebay.com/str/bradentonbooks

Cover: Shiloh Jolie-Pitt

Page 1: Christina Aguilera at 40 -- she talks about child stardom, learning to love her body, and what she wants her daughter Summer to know

Page 2: Contents, Renee Zellweger, Phoebe Dynevor and James McAvoy at the BAFTAs in London

Page 3: Mariska Hargitay and Law & Order: SVU co-star Ice-T take a selfie during a break from shooting the cop drama in NYC, Heather Graham at the beach in Mexico, stepping into the America's Got Talent studio Sofia Vergara elevated her casual cropped jeans with strappy platform sandals in L.A., Jason Momoa cutting a rug with an unidentified partner ahead of filming a scene for his upcoming fantasy film Slumberland in Toronto

Page 4: Colton Underwood comes out -- saying he's the happiest and healthiest he's ever been, the former Bachelor clarifies his orientation

Page 5: Lena Dunham is no stranger to controversy, so it comes as no surprise that her foray into fashion design has also come under fire as she partnered with a plus-size label to create the capsule collection 11 Honore x Lena Dunham, but the kicky line quickly came under fire as critics are calling it tone-deaf, mediocre and not inclusive at all since its largest size is a 26 and some are even going so far to call Lena a grifter who gained weight in order to make money off the plus-size community but Lena, who underwent a hysterectomy at 31, has pointed to early menopause as the cause of her straight-up gut -- while Lena refuses to be intimidated by bullies, she is listening to the complaints about sizes and is planning to address it

* Once a cautionary tale of the perils of child stardom, at age 40 Macaulay Culkin is a father himself as he and girlfriend Brenda Song welcomed a son, Dakota -- he's finally overcome his demons and Brenda has been a huge influence on his life and helped him get back on the straight and narrow and he's even pursuing acting again, shooting season 10 of American Horror Story; his life has taken such a positive turn

* A year after announcing her split from Jay Cutler, Kristin Cavallari is seeing the upside of divorce, saying it's made her a better mom in some ways because she has her kids half the time now so when she has them for her week, she is so incredibly present with her kids Camden, Jaxon and Saylor and she is not distracted by her phone or anything else; she is with them -- Jay and Kristin each have the kids 182.5 days a year and court papers also revealed that her ex is allowed two phone calls and two FaceTime or Skype calls a week and vice versa so now every moment is precious and if someone is having a temper tantrum or something, she remains calm because she knows that she is losing them in a few days

Page 6: Gwen Stefani is widely thought to have had some help in the nips and tucks department, and as her wedding to Blake Shelton approaches, he is starting to object to her constant tweaking of her face -- she's always messing with it by getting more fillers and Botox and Blake is afraid of what he'll see at the altar and he's freaking out at Gwen's increasingly extreme beauty routine which is becoming increasingly over-the-top; Gwen can barely move her face to smile at him anymore and it looks weird -- while he frets, he's trying to reassure his wife-to-be because Blake thinks she's beautiful just the way she is

* As an executive producer on the long-running Law & Order: SVU, Mariska Hargitay has tasked the writers to come up with more storylines featuring one of her favorite characters: defense attorney Trevor Langan, played by none other than her husband Peter Hermann -- Mariska and Peter originally met and fell in love when Peter guest-starred on the show and she loves to keep that magic alive by bringing him back to play Trevor but the trouble is he is busy with his own gigs as a series regular on Younger and his recurring role on Blue Bloods and Peter loves working with his wife, but he has his own acting career apart from Mariska -- still, he may soon have his day in court because Peter understands how Mariska feels and is trying to work his schedule to allow him some guest spots in the near future

Page 8: Star Shots -- Lenny Kravitz with a guitar flaunted his well-sculpted midsection during a stroll on the beach, Suki Waterhouse with her on-the-go grub on the set in Liverpool

Page 9: Louisa Jacobson and Taissa Farmiga and Denee Benton on the set of The Gilded Age in NYC, Conan O'Brien sipped on a soda at lunch in L.A., Katy Perry in the American Idol bathroom

Page 10: Kate Hudson with mom Goldie Hawn and kids Ryder and Rani, Kate Hudson twirled solo modeling in a pal's swimwear collection, Jude Law's daughter Iris Law who will make her acting debut in Danny Boyle's upcoming Sex Pistols biopic makes a call in London

Page 12: Kelly Osbourne handed out items at a food distribution event as the Islamic Center for Southern California, Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson in the gym, despite a no-social warning a cheeky Nicole Kidman shared a pic from the set of Aaron Sorkin's Being the Ricardos in which she portrays Lucille Ball

Page 13: Anabella Sciorra and Donnie Wahlberg gloved up for a Blue Bloods scene in NYC, Heidi Klum and husband Tom Kaulitz started their morning during a walk on the beach in L.A.

Page 14: Travis Barker showed off his body art stepping off a Hollywood tour bus shirtless after filming a music video, a cheerful Britney Spears gave a fun look into her wardrobe in a pink floral frock, Scott Disick and Amelia Hamlin color-coordinated for a walk near the beach in Miami

Page 16: Lamar Odom and Aaron Carter put up their dukes to promote their Celebrity Boxing Match in Philadelphia, Priyanka Chopra Jonas and husband Nick Jonas at the BAFTAs in London, Ellen DeGeneres on the phone during a stroll in her main hood of Montecito

Page 18: Normal or Not? A denim-on-denim clad Jay Leno scratched an itch while filming a project in Los Angeles -- not normal, dressed in a Siggi sweatshirt Katie Holmes picked up some seasonal blooms on Manhattan's Upper East Side -- normal, Kate Beckinsale multitasked during a car ride by applying undereye patches -- not normal

Page 19: Gavin Rossdale appeared to be pleased with his Kitson purchase by doing a little dance after leaving the popular L.A. store -- not normal

Page 20: Fashion -- stars wow in statement-making capes -- Gisele Bundchen, Charlize Theron, Zoey Deutch

Page 21: Greta Gerwig, Elle Fanning

Page 24: Justin Bieber: How Love Saved Me -- the formerly troubled pop singer gives praise for wife Hailey Bieber

Page 25: Olivia Wilde and Harry Styles' romance has already cooled and the pair are giving each other space -- turns out Olivia and Harry don't actually have much in common -- the two jetted to London after wrapping Don't Worry Darling, but they were soon waylaid by their respective responsibilities as Olivia has been spending time with her kids Otis and Daisy while her ex Jason Sudeikis shoots Ted Lasso while Harry, who was spooked by how quickly intense things got, is gearing up for his role in My Policeman -- for now, the two have decided to reassess things when they're back in L.A., which leaves the window open for Jason, whose strategy was to let her and Harry fizzle out, then see where she is at, and it's going according to plan

* Jennifer Lopez calls off her relationship with Alex Rodriguez

* Carrie Underwood and Mike Fisher are better than ever after overcoming a rough patch, one that had their inner circle convinced they were headed for divorce -- Mike had a serious roving eye that made Carrie anxious and she would treat him like he was Mr. Underwood and tensions between the two were at an all-time high when the pandemic hit, forcing the two into extra one-on-one time, but as it turns out, their new routine is just what they needed because they set boundaries, divided up tasks and put time aside for fun things and they prioritized romance, which has made all the difference -- Carrie and Mike are re-committed to their marriage and they've been through so much so much and neither wants to throw it away

Page 26: Cover Story -- Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie's model kid -- Shiloh Jolie-Pitt the gorgeous teen is ready for her close up, but Brad and Angie are at odds about Shiloh's new passion -- Shiloh's been experimenting with girlier styles lately, including growing out her hair and she's at the age where she's starting to change things up -- Brad isn't thrilled about Shiloh's modeling dreams and idea of her walking into the lion's den gives him cause for concern -- Angelina began modeling at 16, just one year older than Shiloh and Shiloh knows that's what set her mom on her path to fame and Shiloh is constantly asking Angie about the pros and cons of the modeling world

Page 29: Model Kids -- these celeb offspring also know how to strike a pose -- Hailey Bieber, Sofia Richie, Amelia Hamlin, Lily-Rose Depp, Brooklyn Beckham, Paris Jackson, Kendall Jenner, Corinne Foxx, Ireland Baldwin, Margaret Qualley, Kaia Gerber, Leni Klum, Patrick Schwarzenegger

Page 30: Prince William and Prince Harry: Behind Closed Doors -- the estranged princes are forced to reckon with their rift as the royal family gathers for Prince Philip's funeral

Page 32: High Anxiety -- it's not so simple for celebs who struggle with panic attacks -- Emma Stone, Stephen Colbert, Amanda Seyfried

Page 33: Hugh Grant, Ryan Reynolds, Ariana Grande

Page 36: Beauty -- nail it -- self-care essentials to score the perfect at-home manicure and pedicure -- Kaley Cuoco

Page 38: Style -- cute cases -- step up your tech, and fashion, game this season with a trendy cellphone cover -- Rosie Huntington-Whiteley

Page 40: Entertainment

Page 48: Parting Shot -- Corey Feldman embraced wife Courtney Anne Mitchell as the two ventured out for a romantic outing in L.A.

[elenaoftheturks]

Dawn of a new era (Takemura/Reader)

Chapter 4: Coffee for two

Goros PoV:

Having nothing to do until the man called V wakes up I decided to follow her.

Maybe she knows where to get something to eat in this city forsaken by the gods.

A cheap place to stay would be great as well since I can’t sleep in the Van all the time.

After walking what felt like an eternity she stopped in a back alley I wouldn’t even set foot in if one placed a gun to my head, in front of a place called ‘Books n Coffee’, from the name I figured it’s a coffee shop.

As she walked inside I asked myself Who would place a coffee shop here of all places?, while looking around.

Well, seems like I’ll stay hungry. I thought I might get something good to eat but obviously Nightcity only has plastic and sawdust.

How utterly disappointing.

Shaking my head to get rid of my thoughts, I decided to go inside.

“Welcome! A table for one?”,the waiter approached, greeted me kindly and with a smile.

“No, the woman who walked in before, I’d like to talk to her.”

“Oh? I am sure I musn’t inform you that stalking women is a very bad habit. Especially in her case it could go very wrong, very fast…”,he said with a sly grin on his face.

“Can I just talk to her? All I want is---”

I couldn’t even finish my sentence when I heard her voice right behind me saying “He may, Thomas. Thank you.”.

The waiter, Thomas smiled at her while he walked past me and whispered “Try anything and you’re dead”.

She walked around me and her eyes flared red.

“He was right tho. Stalking people isn’t nice, especially not if they saved your life before.”

Within a second I couldn’t even move an inch before her eyes returned back to normal.

“I see.. You are a Netrunner. But I mean no harm. I only wish to talk to you. ”

She looked a bit confused but mentioned to follow her as she walked behind a thick red curtain and down some stairs before she sat down on a huge brown fake-leather couch.

I glanced around the room, everything looked antique.

The brown-leather couch with a small wooden table placed on each side, the chandelier hanging from the ceiling and a few candle shaped lamps on the walls.

Somehow her and her outfit fits in this place quite nicely, “She looks like a doll on the huge leather couch”,I thought as she mentioned for me to sit beside her.

“So? What is it what you wanted to ask?”

“I was wondering if you might know where to get some good food around here and … A cheap place to stay at since my pockets are almost empty.”

“Food? Y-You...Ahahaha~ ”,she looked shocked and burst out laughing.

I scratched my neck, even though I knew it is useless because of my cyberware, but it’s a habit I have had since childhood.

I only wished this conversation would be less awkward and less embarrassing.

Your PoV/Third person PoV:

As he looked around the room, clearly not used to such interior you pointed to the unoccupied side of the couch and hoped he’d take the hint.

It took a few seconds but he sat down next to you.

“So?”, you asked, What is it what you wanted of me?”

He shifted a little and with a serious face asked “I was wondering if you might know where to get some good food around here and … A cheap place to stay at since my pockets are almost empty.”

I couldn’t stop laughing.

A full grown man stalking a woman to find food.

That was the most hilarious thing that ever happened but, from the look in his eyes, you could see that he wasn’t lying.

“Well, since this is a coffee shop where you can relax and read, this isn’t the place.”

“I figured as much.”,Goro said while shifting uncomfortably on the couch.

“The Tacos at Mama Welles are really good but she’d shot you on sight and I couldn’t even blame her since your people killed her beloved son.“

Thinking of Jackie made you feel sorry for Mama Welles and Misty alike and it hurt you too.

Just when you felt like crying again, Thomas appeared with two cups of Coffee. Yours included two spoons of sugar and more milk than coffee, just as you liked.

You never understood why people liked coffee so much, you only come here for the books but just reading without buying something just doesn’t feel right, so you started ordering your coffee that way.

“Here’s your regular ____. As for our new guest”,Thomas said while eyeing Goro, “I don’t know your preference, so I hope a black coffee will suffice.” and just like that he put the coffee down, gave a light bow and left.

“So…” you started as you took a sip of your coffee “I can’t help you much with your food-problem however”,you put your coffee down on the small table beside you, “..I might be able to help you with your other problem. The apartment right next to mine is currently unoccupied but... I’m afraid it doesn’t match the standards you are used to.”

Goros PoV:

I didn’t expect it but she is actually quite easy to talk to and willing to help me.

After Rogue turned me down I didn’t think there would be anyone willing to lend me a hand.

The apartment next to her, huh? Might come in handy at some point.

As I took a sip of the coffee the waiter called Thomas brought me I noticed that it wasn’t as awful in taste as I had thought.

“As you can see, I have little to offer. My pockets are almost empty so I can’t complain about anything. Anything will do, truly.”

“Great.” She smiled and took her phone out, called a number and after a quick talk with Granny she turned around grabbed her cup and emptied it on one gulp before offering another kind smile.

“Very well. Let’s go see your new home.”

“This Granny of yours… Is she really okay to have me living there?”, I dared to ask.

“Uh, yes.”,she gave s light nod and placed a few coins next to her empty cup on the table as did I, “As long as you pay your bills and don’t blow the whole place or me up, you should be fine.”

“Fine...Let’s take my Van. Please tell me the directions.”

As we drove to Megabuilding H8, I curiously asked if she lives with her Grandmother but she declined and told me she got adopted by her. After nine sons she was happy to have a girl for a change. I didn’t dare to ask any further questions.

__________________________________

Not sure if anybody is actually reading this but it's a bit slow paced so I could add some character development.

The story will follow the game storyline most of the time but I will add a few dialogues and scenes here and there.

Hope you like it so far. Since I am working full time I barely get time to write and update besides the weekends 😅

[gdwessel]

Moxley Defeats Kojima, Challenged by Suzuki at AEW ALL OUT, Mox v. Suzuki on AEW Dynamite Wednesday 9/8/2021; Other NJPW Activity In Chicago Last Weekend; Kidani Gives Not-Very-Inspiring Interview to Tokyo Sports About Poor Attendances

Once again, technical issues prevented me from posting this yesterday, and it's obvious something needs to be done about the computer I'm using, one way or another. I wasn't even able to finish a podcast yesterday I needed to. So I may be taking a few days off from this thing in order to get my tech issues resolved. Try not to miss me too much?

Sunday night at AEW's ALL OUT PPV from Hoffman Estates, IL, former IWGP US Heavyweight champion Jon Moxley defeated the visiting Satoshi Kojima in the second match of the show, and it was very good. Of course, Kojima isn't a huge name among modern wrestling fans necessarily, so the AEW commentators did a very good job explaining just how decorated Kojima's been through his career to build him up, and Kojima was over with the live fans in attendance. Moxley did defeat Kojima after two Death Riders, and then cut a promo saying he was irritated that a certain someone wasn't answering his challenges (Hiroshi Tanahashi).

Cue "Kaze ni Nare," and Minoru Suzuki appeared, officially kicking off his US tour. Suzuki made his way to the ring, and got into an elbow battle with Moxley, getting Mox's blood on him as Mox skinned his elbow at some point in the match, probably due to his activity on Saturday night (more on that below). Eventually Suzuki got the better of Mox, and hit a Gotch-style Piledriver on him to end the segment. Of course, Mox v. Suzuki had the potential to be a feud of the year in 2020 before the pandemic put a stop to that, so it's good they've decided to revisit this whilst Suzuki is on his tour of the indies this Fall. Mox v. Suzuki is now booked for this Wednesday's AEW Dynamite, from Moxley's home town of Cincinnati, OH. This was of course the first of four shock appearances, what with Ruby Soho, Adam Cole and, critically, Bryan Danielson all appearing. This was a very, very good show, and I highly recommend it.

(Another date to Suzuki's tour has been added now, as Premiere Wrestling Xperience in Concord, NC, has booked Suzuki v. Anthony Henry for their All Hail The King event on 10/2/2021, so that will go on the itinerary now as well!)

That wasn't all Moxley got up to this past weekend. As of Saturday night, Mox is now the Game Changer Wrestling Heavyweight Champion, after quickly defeating Matt Cardona (yes, the former Zack Ryder, who beat Nick Gage last month in what has been a masterclass of getting heat that should be studied by wrestlers and fans alike) via Death Rider onto lighttubes (which might be where the cut came from that opened Sunday). Afterwards, Moxley laid out the belt as a challenge to Nick Gage (something that has been building since Wrestlemania Weekend), which was accepted, and will take place at GCW's show in Atlantic City, NJ, on 10/9/2021.

Elsewhere, the NJPW Strong Openweight champion "Filthy" Tom Lawlor is now Tommy Two Belts, as he defeated the Black Label Pro Midwest Champion, former Time Splitter Alex Shelley, for that title at the joint GCW/BLP show 3 Cups Stuffed late Friday night, and then defended it the next day at BLP's Ground Control to Filthy Tom, defeating Daniel Garcia (late of both AEW and NJPW Strong) in the main event of that show. Juice Robinson also got involved with the proceedings this weekend, defeating 1 Called Manders at AAW's Destination Chicago show on Thursday 9/2/2021, the company's return to the Logan Square Arena for the first time since lockdown. AAW frequently books Impact talents on their shows (Josh Alexander and Jake Something still regularly feature for AAW), so that's likely how that booking happened.

All of the above events, even AEW ALL OUT, are available for purchase on FITE TV right now.

Yesterday, NJPW (and Bushiroad [and STARDOM!]) owner Takaaki Kidani gave an interview to Tokyo Sports, acknowledging the relatively poor attendances for the two nights of Wrestle Grand Slam in MetLife Dome this past weekend (barely over 2000 each night), even in light of reduced capacities due to states of emergency. Kidani recognized that attendances are down for the promotion, and even said if something does not happen soon, the three nights of Wrestle Kingdom 16 may be "duds." What's worrisome is, Kidani's solution in light of "foreign talents" not coming over (well, except when they are -- Zack Sabre Jr., Jeff Cobb, Tama Tonga, Tanga Loa, Chase Owens and KENTA are all booked for G1 Climax 31), appears to be "booking more matches," which I suppose could also be read as "booking more events."

There are a few problems with NJPW right now. The amount of matches on shows is not one of them. Indeed, I daresay the reduced number of matches has shined a light on just how ponderously endless a cycle the prelude tag matches can be, and the extended Summer Struggle tour showed that as well. The problem is a lack of compelling ideas and storylines happening with the talents they have right now. No, not every feud will be Okada v. Tanahashi, but then, they don’t need to be in order to be something the crowds can get behind. SHO v. YOH has the potential to be something worth watching; lazily throwing SHO into yet another sub-faction of the Bullet Club is not the way to build interest in it. That only sort of worked last year with EVIL, because their backs were against the wall immediately following lockdown. EVIL hasn’t amounted to jackshit since. Why they went to that particular well again is beyond me.

The debacles regarding the IWGP World Heavyweight Championship loom large in this equation too. From the initial unification that got rid of a beloved belt, even among the attending fans in Japan, not just Western internet fans, to the failures of Kota Ibushi and Will Ospreay as champions, have only served to heighten the malaise among the fans. Shingo Takagi is a great champion so far; that match v. EVIL on Sunday, eh, was not. Ospreay’s absence from Japan has completely derailed the United Empire, the first new NJPW stable in over 5 years when it was formed, and now Great O-Khan, the most interesting new character in the NJPW setup in the last year, can barely get booked on shows. Sure, perhaps “book more matches” might help that, but not if it’s just endless tag matches when Jeff Cobb nor Aaron Henare can’t be counted on to be on every tour in this pandemic age. It says something that the longest serving champions in NJPW right now include YOSHI-HASHI as part of that tandem.

Long story short, there are issues with NJPW, no doubt. Kidani acknwledging the slumping attendances, especially in light of announced a three-day Wrestle Kingdom 16, is good. I don’t think he’s going about this the right way tho. More matches is not the answer. More better storylines and feuds, that might be a better idea to try first.

Well, that's all for me, for now. See you on the other side of these laptop issues.

[thedefinitionofendgame]

The Definition Of Endgame

/'en(d),gām/ the idea that two people are meant to be together, forever

hi, I'm kaykay! welcome to my little blog corner of the world where (most) characters get their happy ending, no matter how the writers left them. I'm an avid reader, hopeful writer and love TV shows, movies and books with all my heart.

Story behind my username:

I've always used the word "endgame" when talking about fictional couples (and sometimes real ones)

To me, endgame means forever. And no matter what their storylines are, my OTPs are endgame to me. Nothing will ever change that.

Your endgame(s) might be different than mine. That's okay. As long as your favourite couple(s) are endgame to you, forever is possible.

please checkout this post about rules (!)

my sideblog can be found at @endgamequotes :)

I write fanfics (same username as this blog)

You can find my ao3 pseud here

And my fanfiction.net page here

I'm always open to fic prompts; send me an "ask" anytime :)

My fanfic masterlist can be found below via "keep reading"

I used to have the username @/oakleyfraser4 but changed to match my Tumblr & Instagram handle. All works under the previous username still belong to me

All of my original tumblr posts can be found at the hashtag "#the definition of endgame"

Thanks for checking my page out! Happy blogging :)

Fanfic Masterlist | @thedefinitionofendgame

ON TUMBLR

ON AO3

Series: Amelia & Link’s Dream Come True

Grey's Anatomy

two under two - Amelia and Link discover they’re having another baby only half a year after Scout

i will never stop loving you - A sudden death has Link remembering how much he loves Amelia

even when forever falls apart - Accidents happen, but one in particular leaves Amelia feeling alone and lost

Series: Mark & Lexie, Meant To Be

we’re gonna be so happy - Lexie and Mark in the last moments of their time together on earth

Non-series fics

don’t waste one single minute - On Meredith’s beach, Mark and Lexie are reunited and Meredith reflects on what loss and love is like

Series: Jo & Alex, What Should've Been

walked through hell - When a familiar face shows up at Grey Sloan Memorial, Jo is hit with news she never thought she would receive

baseball takes your mind off things - Slexie, Merder and Cristowen play baseball to distract themselves from the results of the recent hospital cuts (6.03 extended scene)

Station 19

Series: Andy & Sullivan, The Only Good Thing

I Love You, Baby - Andy is keeping a secret from her husband but Robert isn't dumb and intends to find out sooner or later

Non-series fics

A New Adventure - Maya and Carina's son is graduating, which causes his moms to feel a lot of emotions

Collection (Grey’s Anatomy X Station 19): Code Red

Love Is Enough - Surrera's journey to make it back to each other, after the season 4 finale

Code Red - s18 of Grey's Anatomy and s5 of Station imagined by me and @greys-for-days

The 100

Series: John Murphy & Emori’s Forever

The Story Behind The Grand Canyon - Murphy’s heart was never the same after the love of his life died, but he has to keep it together for his-their-daughter

John & Emori : The Happy Ending They Deserve - John Murphy and Emori have been through so much, they deserve whatever goodness life has to offer

Little Thief - Auntie Raven finds herself hanging out with her favourite thief, none other than Alexie Murphy

Three - Murphy, Emori and their daughter make up a family, and that’s all they ever need

Dance With Me - Murphy and Emori take advantage of a night together after barely surviving the day

Chaos Makes Love - Emori has a secret she’s keeping from Murphy, but when he finds out the news, his reaction is not what she expects

Underneath The Sheets - In Becca’s lab, Murphy and Emori have a moment alone, although not the usual moment that happens between these two

So Much For Forever - Murphy doesn't make it to the ship before the bombs, so he and Emori spend their last minutes, forever together (canon-divergent with 5.13)

You Always Mattered To Me - Murphy tells Emori just how much she matters to him

Fall To Pieces - Emori and Murphy loved each other and they will fight for together until their last breath

You Almost Had Me - Emori does her best to change Murphy's mood when it's clear he doesn't want to play "Primes" (7.01 extended scene)

Series: The Ring Years

Every. Single. Damn. Time. - Raven learns the importance of knocking during Spacekru’s time on The Ring

Friday Fun Nights - Game night for Spacekru consists of algae-alcohol, spilled secrets and a the bonding of friends to family

Bellamy & Raven...With Benefits - Raven and Bellamy are bored...and solve this in an interesting way

Series: It’s Hard To Be A Hero’s Kid

It’s Hard To Be A Hero’s Kid - Arden Murphy, the second youngest of Murphy and Emori’s kids, faces the best and worst parts of growing up, discovering who he is, and learning what love means

Series: Levitt & Octavia Together In The End

Levitt Alone - Levitt meets Octavia and even though it’s him looking into her mind, she hasn’t left his alone since he walked in

Levitt Is Not Alone - Levitt reflects on how Octavia changed him and decides to do something reckless when he sees her again

Level Eleven - Levitt and Octavia admit their feelings for each other and share a moment alone to learn more about each other (7.09 extended scene)

Series: Troped: The Fanfic Challenge

What Is Mine - Jordan learns the important lesson of family and friendship as he attempts to get back something he feels he rightfully deserves

The Life We Seek To Find - Murphy and Emori make the daring decision to travel across the unknown wasteland of Earth in order to find the so-called ‘City Of Light’ in the hopes of finding a better future for their family

All I Want For Christmas - Tired of being single, Murphy decides to take matters into his own hands and agrees to “fake date” his coworker, Emori, during Christmas holiday events

You're All I Have - The backstory of Levitt, and how he ended up on Bardo in the first place

Non-series fics

May We Meet Again (written prior to 7x15 airing) - A blurb of what I think the ending of the 100 (season 7) could look like

The Mother-Daughter Book Club

Secrets, Lies & Other Hidden Things - The original book club girls are in for a surprise when they decide to “restart” the MDBC, as their kids seem to be just like their moms. Luckily there’s book club magic to help them out along the way

Heartland

10 Years, A Heartland Story - 10 years after season 11, who knows what could happen now? Follow the Borden family as their three kids grow up, all while still calling Heartland “home”

This Is Us

This is You + Me - Kevin is interviewed about his career, his wife and his kids all while thanking the lucky stars be met Sophie all those years ago.

[breadclubrising]

Your thoughts on Ibushi feeling mentally weak because of his loss? I feel like he hurts(? If that makes sense like he is not being enough for his idol and that affects his performance in some kind of way, also DT proposing a new partner downplaying Tanahashi's effort and them being pushy in "beg us for the titles! Muahahaha" gives out they want it more than GA since they already decided not to go for a rematch until they win one. In the end just want to hear your thoughts Ibushi's storyline

Ha, Anon. You know not what you ask. I have been working on an essay about this for a while now (aren’t you shocked!), so I’ll excerpt some of it here. And now this is becoming an essay in its own right. 

(I made a post about this and...)

---

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Aw thanks, Anon. I will try to address all of this. It is very long, and I’m sorry.

---

I’ll start by saying this: Golden Ace made me stop watching wrestling for a while. It hurt that much. Just to put out there how many feelings I have about this.

First things first:

I do not know that I can convey with human language how much I love Hiroshi Tanahashi. My favorite readings of his character give him a tragic edge; to me the shining superstar is not nearly as interesting without his dark side: his need to control, his unwillingness to admit that he is slowing down, his single-minded view of what is Good and Right. His career arc—where he began as an iconoclast who in-kayfabe single-handedly saved NJPW from ruin and saved its wrestlers from the brutality of Inokiism, and has morphed into a well-meaning but narrow-minded patriarch who Knows Best, in part because of his being so beloved for what he achieved, gracelessly pretending he is not getting slower—is heartbreaking and beautiful. He beat the man only to become the man. He sacrificed so much and tries to impose his way on others as a way of justifying his sacrifices. I have... just so much written about Tana’s career arc. It’s one of my favorites ever.

And honestly, I love the story of Ibushi and Tanahashi as a story. It’s heartbreaking and beautifully performed. On an out-of-kayfabe level, I adore both of them and their ability to share of themselves so deeply while still making a story for public consumption. 

But in kayfabe, as an Ibustan? Tana and I are gonna have a problem.

(so, so much more below this cut. you have been warned.)

My slacker genius hero 

idk if you’ve noticed this, but Ibushi is consistently depicted as kind of weird. And I confess I’m projecting a bit here, but part of being Weird On Main is that you do it because you cannot be not-weird no matter how hard you try. Maybe sometimes you can contain it, but your default state is weird and whatever it is that normal people do, you do not understand it nor are you capable of doing it.

His entire career has been guided by his heart first and ambition second. That’s how he is, he follows his heart. The dearth of fucks he gives about what he should be doing is truly awe-inspiring. And that was probably for his own survival: when you are that fucking talented, what you should be doing is a weight you carry with you at all times. People constantly wondered why he didn’t try to ‘do better’ than DDT. As soon as he got to NJPW, people wondered why he wasn’t bulking up to move up to heavyweight. As soon as he was able to gain enough weight, he was in the G1 (where he promptly got a concussion). 

He has always seemed to struggle with the weight of Living Up To His Potential, knowing that talent like his obligated him to answer for it, but also knowing that he doesn’t feel invested in things unless he’s enjoying himself. Career achievements were never much of a motivator for him—he wanted them, of course, but always ran into the wall of having to sacrifice his own happiness or mental health to get them. But like... normal people do that all the time, right? Sacrifice and hate their lives in order to reach some long-wanted goal? And like many Weirds, Kota seemed to spend a long time stuck in the tortuous I SHOULD be able to do this, normal people can do this brainspace.

The best example of this is something that Tanahashi would have admired: at one time, Kota was the first wrestler in a major promotion to have two home promotions. Like literally two full-time jobs as a wrestler; on the full-time roster at both DDT and at NJPW. What kind of wrestler is worth that physical risk and scheduling nightmare? What kind of wrestler is worth sharing as a commodity with one of your competitor promotions? Kota Fucking Ibushi is.

This burned him out quickly—he says, far more emotionally than physically—and he left wrestling altogether for a while, with the official excuse of finally getting surgery on a herniated disc in his neck. He wrestled at WWE for a bit before, shockingly, finding it too constrictive. 

Finally, he decided to become a freelancer, which is A Choice when you are one of the most naturally talented people a sport has ever seen. It means you won’t be winning major titles and you won’t get a ton of investment from any one promotion, but it also means you get to control what you do, when you do it, and how much of it you do. Ibushi rejected any career path that would lead to traditionally-defined success, and he did so intentionally, in service of his mental health and ability to love his job.

Because like. He tried to do what a normal person with his level of talent would do, and he couldn’t stand it. It made him hate wrestling and his life. He pushed himself hard and he failed. Not meaning that he did not succeed in terms of his career—he was doing great when he left NJPW, and WWE offered him contract stipulations and money that were unheard of—but meaning his body and mind began failing him. Finally, he’d been forced to accept that the world’s expectations simply did not work for him. And then he had decided to be unashamed of that, and built himself a way of being that fit him, in a culture where obedience is a sign of maturity and poise (you can see it in the word: 大人しい; “quiet, docile, obedient”; literally “like an adult”). 

The Ace and the Golden Star

Tanahashi and Ibushi may sort of be coming to a place of understanding now, but they haven’t historically seen each other as equals. Ibushi calls Tana a god, and Tana has always admired Ibushi’s talent, but been disappointed by his work ethic. (Hiroshi “Very Extremely Healthy And Non-Fucked-Up Relationship With Work Ethic” Tanahashi and Kota “Reacts Well To Being Told Not To Do Things” Ibushi.)

When Ibushi came back to NJPW for the G1 in 2017, he was coming back to it on his own terms, as a freelancer. He debuted his finisher Kamigoye (which, in case anyone has never read my blog before, means “go beyond god”) to beat Tanahashi during that same G1. 

Ibushi lost his subsequent challenge for Tanahashi’s IWGP Intercontinental Championship, and at the end of the match, he tearfully embraced victorious Tanahashi, who patted his very worthy rival on the head. Ibushi felt humbled, like he hadn’t lived up to his potential. By losing, he felt he’d disappointed Tana.

And maybe Tana didn’t disagree. Tana spent the 2018 G1 (and the theme continued through the latter half of 2018) saying in his backstage comments that Kota Ibushi wasn’t living up to his potential. That he needed to work harder and put his nose to the grindstone to become Great. 

Tanahashi genuinely admires Ibushi and is amazed by his talent, so he truly saw it all as coming from a place of love. He’s a big fan! He just wanted to see Ibushi do his best, and Tana has a really strong opinion about what “doing your best” means. In Tana’s mind, Ibushi (who one thousand percent Did Not Ask) needed to get serious and win some titles, needed to commit and work harder, devote more of his time and energy to wrestling, and generally follow exactly the path Tana himself had in order to succeed. And Tana didn’t mind saying so without invitation, and to the press.

Oh, and don’t forget that coincidentally Ibushi was on a tag team with Kenny Omega, whom Tana disliked for reasons he juuuust couldn’t put his finger on. (Later it came out: Kenny’s an immigrant! Ha ha! Great and good! I could do a whole other essay about this storyline. It was REALLY good and they had to abandon it completely.) Ibushi needed to get serious about his life and stop wasting time with that loser (IWGP Heavyweight Champion) Kenny Omega. Kenneth was dragging Ibushi down, said Tana, which—regardless of whether you agree with Tana or not—is uh... probably not an opinion you should just volunteer out loud to the press about someone you purportedly care about.

Tana was offering ‘helpful’ suggestions without realizing that not only was Ibushi happier than he’d ever been, he was happy because he had already tried the things Tana was helpfully suggesting, and had deliberately decided to do the opposite of that, so that he could be happy.

When your entire thing is in my career I do things on my terms, this is who I am and I’m not sorry, and someone is telling you you’re doing your career wrong, it’s gonna sting extra. Because you’re a fucking weirdo, and if you could do things the expected conventional way, you would in a heartbeat. So the thing that you are “doing wrong” is a thing you have fought tooth and nail to do in a way that works for you. If it meant being shamed for it, it didn’t matter, because there was no other way you could have done it. 

So, Tana didn’t know it, I don’t think, but his ‘the way you’re managing your career is wrong’, tragically, really meant ‘the way you are is wrong’, when applied to Ibushi.

(And? When you’re doing it wrong and part of what you’re doing right now is being extremely fucking gay? That “get serious about your life” plays into a whole mess of extremely unfortunate tropes about gays. I have no idea if these tropes exist in Japan as well, but western gays are deeply familiar with them. Of course I don’t at all believe Tana meant it that way, but unfortunately, as A Gay, it’s too familiar for me not to hear it there. Feels bad man.)

YOU’RE NOT MY DAD

After all that well-meaning (?) shit talking, Ibushi and Tanahashi faced each other in the 2018 G1 finals. Ibushi lost. Was Tana right about all that untapped potential? Was Ibushi once again humbled because god beat his ass?

Last time Tana beat Ibushi, they hugged, Tanahashi magnanimously recognizing the great effort on Ibushi’s part. This time, he held out his hand for a handshake. They’ve come so far as rivals. Right? 

Ibushi looked at it, then held up both hands in front of him, shaking his head and backing away. He said backstage that Kenny would have hit Tanahashi, and Tanahashi clearly wanted a handshake as equals. But, he said, he is not Kenny, nor is he Tanahashi. He does things on his terms.

He didn’t care if it looked disrespectful: Tanahashi’s handshake was a patronizing offer of forgiveness for Ibushi’s failure to live up to Tana’s ideal. Ibushi’s rejection was not disrespect, but demanding respect from someone who had explicitly told him he did not deserve it from them unless he became a different human being than the one he’s fought to be. 

Ibushi left with his head high, so defiant in his weirdness that even if God Himself says you need to change who you are to be worthy of my approval and acceptance Ibushi says, actually the way I am is great, thanks, and I will love myself whether you approve or not. 

I can’t say how much he means to me, because of that. Him rejecting fucking god telling him to be someone else—someone who did not love himself—was more than I could have ever dreamed I’d get out of wrestling. A man who had found, as I had in my life, that no amount of wanting to be able to do things the way that normal people do them would grant that ability, had then decided to find a way that would work for him, and do that. And so had I, and around the same time (Kota and I are also p much the same age). And then, when defeated, instead of allowing someone to say ‘this is because you did not conform,’ he said ‘I cannot be truly defeated because tomorrow, I will still do things the way that makes me happy and fulfilled.’ I could write so much more but I’ll stop here: it meant everything to me.

I mean... dad?

Fast forward to the 2019 G1. A lot had changed. Ibushi had signed full-time with NJPW, much to Tana’s satisfaction. In the leadup to Wrestle Kingdom that year, Tana had very deliberately and openly used Ibushi as a cudgel against Kenny Omega, saying Omega did not deserve his partner, Ibushi, and did not deserve his home, Japan. He had told Omega, who had dutifully worked his way up the NJPW ranks to become the most beloved gaijin in NJPW’s history, that he should not be the third Musketeer (the big 3 guys in the promotion from each generation; the others of this generation being Naito and Okada). Putting a gaijin in that role is Not Done, and Kenny was already Top Gaijin, which was the highest a gaijin should be allowed to go. Further, Tana believed that Ibushi, a part-time freelancer who was not signed with NJPW, should be the third Musketeer, because he is Japanese and Kenny isn’t. 

In kayfabe, Tana had negged Ibushi’s Golden Lover right out of Japan, but NJPW seemed pretty determined to erase the memory of Omega, so Ibushi and Tanahashi were on friendly-ish terms,

“Everything I am begins and ends with Tanahashi,” Ibushi said before the match. Kota won, which almost everyone was expecting, but the real question we all had: how would he treat the Ace once he’d won? Once he embraced him, once he’d pushed him away. Who was Kota Ibushi now, in relation to god? And in relation to the company itself, which Ibushi had recently committed to ‘for the rest of my life’—and which Tanahashi personified? Victorious Ibushi crawled over to Tanahashi and gratefully clasped his hands in fervent appreciation, foreheads together, Tanahashi smiling approvingly, patting his head like ya did good kid. Later backstage, Tana said something like “I sensed a lot of pain in you when we fought, but I can tell you used it to overcome your shortcomings, let go of what was holding you back, and reach your potential.” And at the end of the match, Ibushi had seemed to be in agreement, looking prostrate and humbled, seeking forgiveness for his past sins.

I was saying ‘i-BOO-shi’

Except, like… his “past sins” were: soul-searching and learning what was important to him. Healing physically and emotionally from burnout. Making his way back, on his own terms and no one else’s, to the career he’d had to leave to save himself. Reuniting with a his lost love—not without complication, but undeniably making him happier than he’d been in years, finding the joy in wrestling again, giving himself the emotional energy to invest more and more in his career, but smartly this time, protecting himself. And then telling the Ace of New Japan that he would continue to do things his own way, and no one else’s. 

He did all of this against the backdrop of a culture that punishes individualism or makes it a spectacle. He asserted himself nevertheless, because it was either that or a breakdown. And all of those things were what Tanahashi felt he should be apologetic for, what he had wanted Ibushi to excise from his wrestling and his personality in order to Reach His Potential. 

And... it worked. Ibushi played by the rules, conformed to expectation, and not only did he win, he was accepted and forgiven for his waywardness. Turns out, Tana was right all along: Ibushi needed to be less himself in order to be truly successful. Not only that, through career success and sacrificing the things that made him happy (because they also made him most himself which, again, was bad), he was finally truly fulfilled. 

After an entire career’s worth of refusing for his own sake to do what others expected of him, he finally lived every Weird Person’s wildest fantasy, wherein we sacrifice every strange thing about ourselves that we’ve spent our lives learning to love, in order to Conform, but instead of blowing up in our faces, THIS TIME, FINALLY, it worked, and at long last we found that being Normal truly does bring happiness and success and our parents finally love us. He’s through the looking glass, but he can’t hear us on the Weird side anymore, and doesn’t even remember that there ever were Weirds. And now all the Weirds back home have seen the horrible truth, that changing who you are fundamentally in order to be obedient is… actually the right thing to do, which of course means they were right about us all along. We aren’t good enough just as we are, fundamentally; our parents were justified in withholding unconditional love and everyone else was right to mock us. We throw all our Kurt Vonnegut books into the garbage and we weep.

That was the story. 

So at first I kind of half-heartedly tried to convince myself that all of this was that thing where no matter how much sincere emotional work you do, you will never stop secretly craving your parents’ approval; we are practically hard-wired to want it. And then I moved toward seeing the grateful gesture as a sort of forgiveness, a recognition that his pedestal of Tanahashi had finally toppled and shattered. After all, Ibushi is the sort of dude who got all the way down on the ground to bow to both Nagata and Yoshi-Hashi after beating them in G1 matches, and that certainly wasn’t an apology, it was humble gratitude for their work. So maybe this was a true going beyond god—Thank you truly. I don’t need you anymore.

But... it probably wasn’t that, and it was hard to believe my own bullshit. Ibushi is also the sort of dude who, in his first entrance upon his return in 2017, had gotten all the way down on the ground to bow to fans in deep apology for having been gone for two years; ie apologizing for caring for himself. Heh. But uh... maybe this Tana thing was just a heat-of-the-moment thing, like a quasi-kayfabe act of true honesty?

LOLNO! Time for Golden Ace to immediately win the IWGP Heavyweight Tag Championships, thus not only cementing Ibushi’s return to the Well-Behaved fold and certifying Tanahashi as The Guy Who Was Right About You, but also having all of these things be kayfabe events that happened within the span of a little more than two years: 

Ibushi gets an emotional gay reunion with his tag team and life partner

Tanahashi uses Ibushi as a weapon against said partner, who is forced to leave the company, vindicating Tana’s opinions about both Ibushi and Omega (I don’t care how much you hate Omega, that is a shitty thing to do even if we only care about Ibushi’s feelings.)

Ibushi and Tanahashi win the tag team belts that the Golden Lovers never even got to challenge for

COOL AND GOOD. LOVE THAT.

That story really hurt. I couldn’t watch them be a team.

Haha unless? This current story really hurts too, honestly. But maybe it’s making the past hurt a little less. MAYBE.

So, Tana has been getting physically stiffer and slower for a while now, and now it’s kinda becoming hard to ignore. 

And maybe, hanging out with Tanahashi seemed cool at first but then when Ibushi realized he’d excised every interesting thing about himself in order to conform to what Tana expected of him, it started to wear on him. I’m hoping I can be allowed to have that interpretation.

So Ibushi’s forced to be like ‘hey I need you to step up your game bro,’ which, if Ibushi ever fantasized about turning the rhetorical tables on Tanahashi’s criticism, doesn’t seem to feel nearly as good as he’d hoped it would. It feels bad for both of them.

And Tana seems humbled, because he’s been so embarrassed and stubborn about admitting that maybe, possibly, potentially, he could be slightly perhaps showing signs of failing to be immortal. But maybe he also now sees that his ‘tough love’ criticism of Ibushi didn’t make Ibushi better, ultimately, it just made him care about and value the same stuff Tana does. And oops, now maybe Ibushi has ideas about success that don’t really take into account the limitations Tana has, even if he’s worked very very very hard to try to push through them until he was forced to admit that he needed to find another way. This sounds familiar and I hate it!

Tanahashi is now trying to find his way. And Ibushi, once humbly appreciating Nagata and Yoshi-Hashi after beating them, is now hard-eyed and almost deliberately lacking awareness of others’ need for compassion. Tana got what he wanted—Ibushi in his own image—but now he’d probably be a lot better off with the sparkly-eyed mischief-maker who doesn’t care as much about titles as he cares about loving wrestling. 

Of course, Kota very much had his own reasons for doing this too—he felt the pressure to win titles to match his talent at least as much as Tana felt it for him—but it’s still kinda heartbreaking that he became the determined and serious never-getting-too-close-to-anyone company man that Tana envisioned him as, and then it worked. That’s a completely new way of judging his worth as a person, when he’d spent his career before that judging his worth by how happy and fulfilled he was. So when he loses now, he’s even more hard on himself because he’s also letting Tana down, and Tana really believed in him.

But I think he’s also starting to get uncomfortable, because he’s getting dangerously close to re-learning a lesson he has already learned pretty painfully. He’s done all this work and sacrifice only to find that—shockingly— winning and being seen as a Top Guy is still not worth your happiness and mental health.

And it was PRETTY shitty of him to walk away from Tana getting a beatdown! That felt VERY bad. But Tana has been failing to admit that he can’t do the shit he used to do, to his own detriment. IMO that doesn’t justify Ibushi leaving him to deal with shit on his own but also, I kinda don’t blame him if he feels resentful of Tana for asking him to be a different person in order to fit within Tana’s vision of him, all while Tana refuses to admit that he himself does not fit the vision he has for himself, which is ultimately making it harder to do the thing Ibushi now feels more driven to do than ever—partially because of Tana’s influence—which is win. WHEW.

FEELS BAD.

But! Hey! Then Tana did exactly what Ibushi asked and like cut a little fat and got more serious about his hair and tan. And then he got a pin on Dangerous Tekkers and now he deserves a title shot. And he’s like ‘Ibushi in Soviet Russia god stans u’ and Ibushi is like “excellent sir, ready 2 only care about my personal success!” So now they’re friends again? And they’re even, because a person not accepting that they have to conform to others’ expectations, and a person not accepting that they are aging like every human being does, are totally morally equivalent? And all that nuanced storytelling was totally in my head? 

Yay? 

So where is this going?

Bro idk. I’m so deflated by this storyline it’s hard to think of a scenario that would make me stop being devastated by potentially having THE major reason wrestling means so much to me (Kota Ibushi’s weirdness and perpetual defiance of expectation, for the sake of fiercely and unwaveringly committing to himself and the belief that he deserves to be valued for who he is, his hard-fought path that he carved for himself when he saw that he couldn’t do stuff the way he was Supposed To, succeeding because he is unapologetically honoring that in a world that demands conformity and obedience and punishes deviation; PLUS GAY, which makes everything even more poignant I’M TOTALLY FINE) permanently written out of existence. 

If Kota learned that forcing yourself to be normal 1. totally works, 2. brings instant success, and 3. was the right thing to do all along because the way you were was stupid and foolish and the fact that you ever thought you should be accepted, let alone allowed to feel okay about yourself, let alone happy, when you can’t even do the most basic human functions correctly, just goes to highlight how deeply alien and unacceptable you are, fundamentally, as a person LIKE I SAID I’M FINE IT’S FINE, then I should probably stop caring about wrestling and get to figuring how to live a 9-5 existence and how not to care about things to a degree that makes other people laugh at me and not use ten-dollar words and stop making men feel nervous because I’m way smarter than they are, and also i guess have a dog and find a monogamous husband whom will get me pregnant with some kids, and I’ll go to bed at a reasonable hour! Because! If Kota can do it and be successful then goddammit I can too.

I’m fine.

But idk. It’s hard to imagine why they’d do this little rift storyline and have nothing come of it except Golden Ace are better bros than ever before. I don’t even know what I want. Right now it feels like this arc is about Tana’s development, and Kota is kinda a supporting character. 

Maybe it felt valuable to in-kayfabe acknowledge the fact that Tana sometimes looks like his knees and hips don’t bend, but ultimately show that the Ace has still got it! And also Kota Ibushi is a selfish asshole who talks down to his elders. I mean, a stern but fair leader? I mean a driven, tough-love champion? 

Maybe Tana will fail in the title match despite his cosmetic improvements, because he has still fundamentally failed to earnestly engage with his limitations. 

Maybe he really has accepted and learned to work with a new reality and now he’s on fire.

I think the only way to make this feel satisfying would be to turn it into a long-term rivalry of some flavor, where Tana had the Ace Wars with Okada, now he can have a God War with Ibushi. When Tana can no longer be NJPW’s heart and soul, I don’t think anyone can fill those shoes. But he has already in many ways passed on the soul of NJPW to Okada which was cemented with the Ace Wars, so maybe this is how he’ll eventually (hopefully a while from now) pass on the heart of NJPW to Ibushi; make Ibushi earn it the same way Okada had to unequivocally prove he was worthy of Ace, including to Tanahashi himself.

I could see a rivalry where they go their separate ways but are grateful for having learned some things together. They truly both feel like equals now, and they support each other living their best lives. This would be a rivalry where they constantly push each other to be better; Ibushi figuring out a way to be true to himself and still win, and Tanahashi figuring out how to have a glorious, once-in-a-century late career and gaining new vitality as he throws off the weight of pretending he’s still in his prime.

RACHEL ARE WE GETTING A HEEL TURN OR NO

ORRRR I guess one of them could turn heel, because they’re both the shiniest babyfaces and that would rule. While they both know how to heel when needed and take up the mantle gleefully, neither has had a proper heel run really. 

In normal times I’d say ‘but I don’t really think it’s likely that either of them will turn heel’, but these are not normal times. I truly don’t know what to think or expect. Bullet Club is missing its heavy hitters and may be for a while (can it be Yujiro’s time to shine at last??), which is why EVIL and Dick Togo are there now. In a way I could see a heel Tanahashi take advantage of that power vacuum and it would be incredibly badd ass.

I could see Tanahashi resenting Ibushi and getting real mean about it, doing that thing where someone provokes Ibushi until they go too far and get rekt. Like going back and using all that ‘i’m your father and i disapprove’ bullshit he did. Ibushi wins the HW title, Tana challenges and loses bc he makes the same old ‘but i’m actually 27 years old still’ miscalculations that have been a problem for Golden Ace. But he gets his groove back and eventually beats Ibushi for the HW title, and gets a later-career run he deserves (i lov u tana). 

But... it actually would NOT rule at all to see Ibushi turn heel. 

Which is a major shame, because you have no idea how on board I am, in theory, with him donning the black and gold, dyeing his hair back to black, being sadistic all of the time, thinking up tag team moves for him and ZSJ, getting evil smiles of approval from The King, and somehow becoming good at not only talking but saying mean things, which he never ever does even when people are mean to him. In a just world, I could be very down with Suzuki-gun Ibushi. 

But we do not live in a just world, we live on Earth in the system Sol in the year 2020 AD. If Ibushi did a heel turn now, it would most likely be in further service of the narrative that his desire for independence and happiness was selfish and bad, his individualism and unapologetic strangeness were embarrassing, and Tana was right to tell him to stop being gay and start destroying his body more. Because a dude that disrespects his elders and role models is Not A Good Dude. Because rebellious people whose biggest act of rebellion is loving themselves when everything around them tells them they shouldn’t are Wrong, Actually.

So as much as in theory I’d love to see him in Suzuki-gun, in practice I would probably never be able to watch wrestling again because it validated the worst fears I have about how I move through the world. If Kota Ibushi is Wrong for being weird then perhaps truly nothing is salvageable for me about this horror show of a planet.  (Also, practically speaking, the Bullet Club being down so many folks might mean that the other true heel faction is less likely to get new members.)

Like, in-kayfabe, yeah, this story already feels like a betrayal. But also out of kayfabe, if it turned out that the Lesson was ‘if you conform you will be successful and loved’? And Kota took part in that story? I know it sounds extremely well-adjusted of me to say, but I’d feel a little like he betrayed me; showing me it was okay to be weird so convincingly and then going ‘actually I always hated being weird, I don’t regret giving up everything I thought I loved about myself, in order to be normal. which means not only is it possible to overcome being the off-putting freak you are, but you are failing at doing it every single day.’ Or—perhaps even worse—the story I thought I saw, that made me feel seen (like, actually), was never there to begin with. Which... would mean that the story I saw was actually just what actually happened in real life to a person I admire so much, who has brought me so much joy. I don’t think I could take any of those outcomes and still enjoy wrestling.

That’s totally a normal thing to feel, right?

Epilogue in which ya girl has been exposed to too many harmful chemicals recently

In order to soothe my faltering ability to find joy in wrestling, I shall note a very cracky theory, which is The Middle Path: 

Ibushi’s a strange dude, and he plays by his own rules. He does not like factions; he’s in Hontai more or less by default... but NJPW’s resident Island of Misfit Toys faction is down one heavyweight, and was already very small. 

Perhaps Ibushi and Tanahashi will agree to disagree about whether you should be weird and happy or drill your body into a fine pulp until you die, and their rivalry will take a more official form when Ibushi’s arc comes full circle: where he once graciously tried to accept his old friend back into the fold so many years ago, his old friend is now well and truly the Shuyaku, and welcomes him, fist raised, to the loving arms of the Weirds. Milano Collection AT weeps because he can now stan more fervently. La Estrella Dorada Ingobernable has, after all, always been the very definition of ungovernable.  (This seems unlikely because of Ibushi’s gr9 rivalries with SANADA and Naito, but in a world where EVIL joined Bullet Club, do we really know what’s real anymore?)

---------

WHEW! Anon, if somehow there is anything you feel I did not address sufficiently, please let me know. Otherwise, as always, thank you for giving me an opportunity to write about something that interests me, and I am sorry for who I am as a person.

[stxphxn-strange]

i want to start posting from my ironstrange college au (remember the makeup fic i posted in like november? i’ll link it below but it’s from that verse) so! let me explain it:

reminder that this is an au and it’s my au, so i decide how this all goes!

Ships:

IronStrange (duh)

ThorBruce

Valcarol

Sambucky

Christine x Hope Van Dyne* (this gets complicated)

Eventual Pristine

Past Stony, Past Stucky

(Lowkey I’m also figuring out if Rhodey x T’challa could be a ship? they both seem too independent but i also might add it in)

Character Notes:

Tony deliberately never specifies if he prefers to go by Anthony or Tony. People call him both, or also his friends call him Ant. Stephen does not/has never called him Tony, he’s always known him as Anthony.

Happy just tends to go by H or Harry (anyone who calls him Harold receives a death glare, but as a joke Rhodey got him a T-shirt and the pattern is just name tags that say “hello my name is Harold.”)

Rhodey just goes by Rhodey bc Tony *insisted* that all their friends call him that and plus he doesn’t hate the nickname.

Natasha is part of this but she doesn’t go to school with the rest of the group. She’s Tony’s half sister and is the biological daughter of Maria Stark and her best friend. She lives in Italy with some of Tony’s extended family and her bio dad. Few people know of her existence, or they know her as Maria’s niece (for her own protection). It doesn’t rly matter that Howard has no idea who she rly is, he wasn’t with her the entire time Maria was pregnant w Natasha bc she was in Italy (and brought Tony with her)

Roommates:

- Tony and Rhodey are roommates, and they live two floors above the four suitemates. The four suitemates are: Christine and Pepper (who share a room) and Stephen and Wong (who share the other room) despite that, the six of them tend to move fluidly in between both spaces.

- Hela and Carol

- Val and Hope

- Thor and T’challa (Bruce spends a lot of time w them)

- Bruce, Sam, and Loki (as chaotic as it sounds btw)

- Bucky and Happy, who I’ve decided are very close. (btw nobody particularly enjoys the fact that Sam and Bucky live next door to each other, when they’re Busy their roommates can be found w Stephen and Co. or one of the other Odinson siblings).

Friend Groups (note: people overlap/belong to multiple groups, this is also not the full list bc that could go on for a long time):

- The Main Six: Tony, Rhodey, Stephen, Wong, Christine, and Pepper.

- Team Big Brain: Tony, Bruce, Stephen, Hope, Carol, Christine, and Bucky.

- Doctors: Stephen, Tony, Christine, and Bruce.

- Dumbass Protection Squad: Hela, T’Challa, Carol, Happy, Rhodey, and Pepper (usually).

- Psych Majors: Pepper, Wong, T’Challa and Loki.

- Stark Industries: Tony, Pepper, Rhodey, and Happy.

- People who Like Astrology: Loki, Bucky, Val, sometimes Christine.

Storylines (There’s no established time frame for this really, but it doesn’t follow mcu canon or any canon):

- Stephen and Tony are lifelong friends. They met on the first day of kindergarten and went to school together in NY (where both their families lived at the time) until middle school. For unspecified reasons, Stephen’s parents opted to move the Strange family to Nebraska before the start of 6th grade. Stephen and Tony were Devastated but were already inseparable at that point and stayed in touch. A business opportunity moved the Starks from NY to California. Stephen stayed in Nebraska for high school but Tony’s parents sent him to boarding school (read: Howard sent him away to avoid having to actually parent, and he thought he was lifting a burden from Maria. This was Not The Case, as she loved her son dearly and would call him everyday. Tony appreciated this more than he ever thought possible.)

- Howard and Stane viewed boarding school as a chance to groom Tony into something malleable and submissive enough to take orders from anyone. His obvious feelings for Stephen (with whom he was still incredibly close) were a Great Concern, so the executive decision was made to set Tony up with Steve Rogers, a blond athlete from his school. It was a way to keep Tony’s sexuality controlled, and Howard didn’t think Stephen was anywhere close to the level he wanted Tony to be (of course, Howard didn’t think his son lived up to his expectations anyway. It was more about control). On the surface, Steve was sweet and everything you could want in a partner, and he even charmed Maria into liking him. She genuinely believed he’d be a good match for her son, so it hurt when she found out what he was really like. Rhodey was Tony’s boarding school roommate for all four (4) years. They met and hit it off overnight, Rhodey instantly feeling brotherly love and the need to protect Tony (or “Tones” as he called him. Rhodey is usually the only one to call him that). Rhodey and Steve did Not see eye to eye on anything, least of all how Tony should be treated. Steve was terrible to him, and Rhodey’s heart broke when Tony admitted he was too scared to break up with him.

- Reenter Stephen. After a particularly bad day, Tony called Maria and Stephen sobbing, missing the two (2) people he talked to more than anyone except maybe Rhodey. It was then he confessed what kind of boyfriend Steve was, and Maria gasped before saying, “Dump him. Let me handle the rest.” That very day, Stephen left school early and traveled to see Tony. It was 2am when he finally arrived, throwing rocks at the window and then scaling the side of the building once he had Tony’s attention. Stephen and Rhodey met the next morning, when Rhodey came back from classes and found his roommate asleep him.

- “So you’re the one who climbed in through my window,” Rhodey said. “For a good reason, I assume.” Stephen confessed it was because he loved Tony and wanted to be there for him, didn’t want him to hurt. (It’s fair to say, though, that Stephen visited before/Tony went to visit him, and they’d spent secret time together over the summers). Tony, believing himself incapable of love, didn’t reject Stephen’s confession but assumed it was only love between friends. The summer before they all left for college (Rhodey, originally from Texas, was also going to school in NY with Tony and Stephen. NY was a big part of who they both were, and they both dreamed of studying there together), they finally started dating at Maria Stark’s motherly demand.

- This demand came a short time before Howard and Maria died, and it also came with admissions of guilt and lots of tears. “I was wrong about Rogers,” she said. “You don’t have to accept what I say or forgive me, but I know Stephen is the right one for you. I think I’ve always known.” (No shit, everyone knew) Knowong she was genuinely sorry, Tony forgave her not knowing that she would die a few months later.

- Most of this canon I’ve created takes place starting in their junior year of college, so everyone has gotten to know each other quite well. I’m sure the more I write from this the more I’ll flesh out relationships between certain characters, but one I want to mention is that Tony and Bucky are very close and co-presidents of the “I Dumped Steve Rogers for Peace of Mind” club. Steve goes to college in the next state/a little further north (that’s as specific as it’ll get for now) and dated Bucky the group’s freshman year. Tony didn’t know any of this until Bucky brought him over one day, and after they (Tony and Bucky) had a talk about the way Steve is as a partner, Bucky realized some things and dumped Steve. He remains angry at them both, especially Tony, from a short distance away which terrifies Tony.

- Sam and Bucky kissed for the first time at a truth or dare night Thor and T’Challa hosted in the group’s sophomore year. After they kissed (Sam initiated) they both shyly admitted feelings for each other.

*Now here’s where things get a little dicey. I started this au with Christine and Hope together for no particular reason, maybe they were on a club sports team together and started dating from there? But Pepper fell in love w Christine at first sight, and it got worse and worse the more they got to know each other. Much like Stephen and Tony, they’re the kind of people who meet each other and just click, even if the eventual path to Pristine involves lots of tears and jealousy for Pepper that Stephen never really experienced. He didn’t feel jealous of Tony and Steve’s relationship, because he wasn’t at boarding school with Tony and there wasn’t much he could do. But as a supportive and concerned (and honest but kind) friend, he was always encouraging and there to listen to Tony. Is Pepper going to be as good of a friend to Christine as Stephen was to Tony while Christine gets ready to marry Hope after undergrad??? that’s the question my forthcoming college au fic will answer.

Also mentioned in my forthcoming fic (which I’m still writing rn)

- post undergrad Wong works as a museum director/curator (havent decided yet, maybe he works his way up the ranks) and double majored in psych and history.

- Stephen, Tony, Happy, Rhodey, and Wong all live together and the rest of the group lives around NYC.

- Stephen, Christine, and Bruce (The Doctor friend group) are all pursuing medical degrees while the SI friend group is transforming the company completely.

++++

Thank you for coming to my TEDTalk! Congrats on reading all the way to the end lmao. I second guessed posting this a lot but then i remembered that it’s mine and I’m just sharing pre-fic thoughts lol. Thanks for reading/for your support of my work y’all!

Read the makeup fic (it doesn’t have a title) here.

💜💜💜💜

[mycreativereach]

The Birth of Oron

Colossus’ raw power, wolverines’ adamantine claws, Captain America's unbreakable shield, the powers of the Greek gods, and the hierarchy of the archangels. These are but a few to name of the heroes I would watch growing up.

I was always a fanboy for superheroes, especially marvel. I had my time with DC, but I was always more drawn to the stories of the X-men or other superheroes within the realm of the marvel universe. Other means of fantasy such as Lord of The Rings and anime such as one-punch man and Dragonball Z played a part as well, but it was a few that stemmed from my childhood that allowed me to develop Oron the character you read today.

Colossus

To say that fantasy and heroes have had a slight impact on my novel is an understatement. I remember getting up early Saturday mornings, roughly around 8 am, to catch a list of cartoon shows that would appear on Fox. Over a few years, the shows had moved around and switched but I always remember waiting to watch the 90’s nostalgic marvel show x-men. The always progressive stories of wolverine’s trust issues and macho feud with cyclops, gambit’s Casanova chivalrous tendencies towards rogue, and Professor X’s forever dilemma of accepting the very humans who hate him while teaching mutants to be at peace with civilization was what I loved about the show. I couldn’t wait to rush to the carpet in front of my tv and sit for two half-hour episodes. At the time wolverine had been my favorite mutant and marvel character for that matter and still is. But the character that helped shape Oron was colossus. I remember seeing him for the first time, his mutant power of being able to enwrap himself in metal which tremendously increased his raw strength and power reeled me in. His character traits of being a humble Russian farmer with roots of loyalty and fighting for good is also what attached me to him even further. From that point on until this very day, colossus is still one of my top favorite marvel characters and has also helped pave the way for me to creating my character Oron. I knew I wanted Orons characteristics to be someone who came across as hard and cold on the outside because of the lore I had built around him, but I wasn’t exactly sure how I wanted him to look. Eventually between coming across colossus combined with my love for bodybuilding and the aesthetics that bodybuilders bring is ultimately the reason why I created Oron to have more of a menacing appeal to my readers. But as for the color of Orons skin, it’s funny that Oron turned to be blue. I have gotten feedback both negative and even some positive saying Dr. Manhattan has played a role in this decision I made. They are similar in some respects but in all honesty, it had nothing to do with that character. The sole reason is that I like the color blue and decided to go with a lighter or sky blue. Navy blue is my favorite to be exact, but I Liked a light shade of blue that looked on Oron and then decided to keep it. I had gone through several other stages of Oron with different colors and patterns and other anatomical appearances, but I felt none of them looked well enough as the color that he ultimately ended up with.

Sarevok

Another character that played a role in the creation of Oron was the main antagonist of the well-known RPG-pc game from the 1990s Sarevok Anchev from Baldur’s Gate. Still one of my favorite villains ever, Sarevok had the menacing appeal of height, increased strength, and malice that caused him to be feared. But it was his assured intelligence and allured determination that made me enjoy his character. Although I like the version of Sarevok from Baldur’s gate, it is the expansion to Shadows of Amn in Throne of Bhaal that was the version that piqued my interest for Oron. Sarevok at this point comes forward to help his brother, the main protagonist in the entire storyline. The evil aura still emanated from Sarevok but as you play out the game, or read the books, you, in turn, find out that even though this once archrival of yours had been your most bitter enemy was nowhere to help you even with the ominous characteristics he still had. This helped give me an idea to develop Orons past as being one of sorrow and negativity while helping Aurelia and although being a stern teacher, Oron meant the best for Aurelia. There were certain differences between the characters but also some similarities as well in the ways of how they displayed their care for the person they trying to help and the determination and confidence they expressed through their cold hard demeanors with Orons being more serious and Sarevoks attitude animating more of a serious but sinister malevolence.

Marvels Cosmic Hierarchy

Getting older I started to really dive into the cosmic hierarchies of Marvel. The vast powers in the universe always intrigued me as to how powerful they could become and how different beings would clash against one another. Being limited to the capabilities we have as humans always made these stronger beings look much more appealing because I knew it was physically impossible to achieve their prominence of power. Characters like Galactus or the In-Betweener from the marvel cosmic hierarchy would always possess jaw-dropping crazy abilities and crash with other beings of good or evil in the universe. I wanted to adapt powers such as this into my storyline, but I wanted to also make sure the readers knew that no matter how powerful one could seem, everything in my universe can be defeated. We might look at Oron and think that he’s a God of some sort, an undefeatable being with extraordinary abilities. But the truth is Oron could be matched by other relevant powers as well. In Marvels Hierarchy, the order of power is laid out for you to see who is the strongest and weakest of that order, although it's subject to change at times since some beings get stronger and others weaker. But what I enjoy is that even though there is an order of strength of power that doesn’t mean someone of weaker status can’t defeat another being of higher ranking. Because there are so many factors that help accumulate the ranking status of powers you are never fully solidified in that position and can be destroyed. As Marvel fans would know, we saw this when master order and lord chaos put aside their differences and joined together to destroy the living tribunal who was considered the second to the one-above-all who is the strongest entity in the marvel universe. Another example was how the Knull, the divine leader of the symbiotes, such as the one called venom from Spider-Man appeared from the multi-verse and decapitated a celestial, who were known to be some of the strongest beings in the multi-verse at the time. As much as there are hierarchies sometimes there are powers that seem to have been forgotten or hidden away to avoid detection. And even though there is a list of hierarchical power such as the one Oron is a part of you maybe never be truly undefeatable with other powerful beings that roam the universe.

 Greek Gods of Old

Another form of lore that helped shaped my character Oron was the tales of the Greek Gods from Mount Olympus. The many stories and fiery battles between themselves and also the titans intrigued me the most out of the many legends they were a part of. Their supremacy and dominance over Earth and its inhabitants were similar to what I wanted to implement in how Oron was perceived. Each Greek god had a role to play in part to help civilization keep structured. They each had an array of followers, some more than others, and had cities dedicated to their names. They were worshipped and in term bestowed their blessings upon the strongest of their followers and warriors. But Out of all the gods I always gravitated towards Poseidon and Hercules the most. Poseidon’s because of the wisdom yet commanding presence the god held and Hercules because of the demi-gods valiant heart and brute strength. So, you can say these didn’t exactly correctly tie with Oron but there are similar traits from these characters and the motions of the Greek Gods that inspired some of the character traits in Oron.  Although Oron is a hard-pressed individual he still flows with wisdom from the amount of experience he has gained from his years of life as Poseidon expressed through his many gatherings with other Gods and mainly Zeus. Oron’s strength seems to be unmatched and comes off as an omnipotent figure, similar to Hercules, to the people of Earth. As you read along in the novel you come to see Orons shortcomings and also weaknesses which were important for me to show. But whatever Greek God it was, even though they were far beyond mortals, they could have weaknesses emotionally and physically. You could be strong-willed and mentally equipped but even the Gods can be shaken just like when they had to battle the titans for their freedom.

Christian Biblical Hierarchy and its Powers

Growing up I was brought into a family with moderate practice of the Catholic Christian religion. Every Sunday for several years we would go to church and celebrate the name of God like a lot of other Christian families and live our lives as close to those religious morals. Needless to say, as I got older I drifted farther away from the specific ideological catholic beliefs when it came to how we were created. I still did and currently have a belief that there is some sort of greater being in the universe, but I have concluded that I have no idea what it is. For all I know it could be some greater intelligence that has no shape or form. It could be some superior alien race that decided to use humans as a test subject for their own means of biological experimentation. Or maybe we collided with other forms of substances and we weren’t the direct creation from any being at all, just a number of substances colliding together which then took billions of years to create our bacterial organisms that finally evolved into what we are today. Personally, I don’t believe in the latter of the possibilities, I think there is some sort of greater being or spirit, intelligence, or energy, whatever you want to call it, but have no idea what it is. But as I started to sway away from Catholicism the stories of the archangels and powers within the bible didn’t leave my mind so easily. Reading upon how God created the Earth and then the archangels and other stories such as Able and Kane piqued my interest. This was the foundation for the background lore of Illithesium and also my wanting to add Oron to a hierarchy of characters that belonged to the Christian religion but with my own twist. God's love with the strength of Michael and Lucifer's fallen grace would play a role in Illithesium and Oron but differently from how the bible displays it. Oron and these characters were beings of great power, yes, but they could be destroyed and were not immortal as we learned growing up in religion class. They had physical forms and could be spoken to although through a language far beyond our capabilities. Their legendary powers displayed in the bible also are showcased but in a way that it could be explained and understood in a more somewhat scientific down-to-earth method. Adding Oron to the lore of characters that I grew up reading about and knowing with adding many different featured twists was creatively fun. And the lore thickens as I’m currently writing the second book which you’ll get to see hopefully sooner rather than later.

 My Love for Bodybuilding

As I mentioned up above, bodybuilding has been a part of my life since I was 18 and has allowed me to view life in a specific way. If you want results, then you need to go out and earn them by taking necessary calculated actions in order to have success. By doing this over years I build a physique I had once admired and still admire, for myself through hard work and dedication. Involving myself in bodybuilding and reading upon bodybuilders and strength lifters is what really caused me to adopt a specific look to my character Oron. Now not all my characters look as big as Oron as I want physiological diversity in my novels, but the results one can get from weightlifting and the many ways you can build your body are shown through all my characters. But the reason why I chose Oron to not only be tall and broad but heavily muscular was to give an idea of what a superior being far beyond human capabilities can look like at physical peak performance. But an even bigger and more lasting impression I wanted to leave on my readers was that even the mightiest and biggest beings have demons they have nestled inside them. The strongest of us also have skeletons in their closet they’d like to forget that always come back to eventually haunt us. It was to show that it's normal to have to face your fears and to overcome them. It was a combination of respecting the hard work and ethic that goes into building a body as bodybuilders do, whether they be natural or not, and the strength that has to be applied to overcome the adversity of everyday life obstacles, injuries, and more. And to know that a being that may be tall and strong with power none the likes have seen before can still be shattered as nothing in the universe was made to be perfect and will eventually break under certain pressure.  

Last Thoughts

Oron became a staple in the Illithesium novel and to find out more you’d of course have to read up on the book to see what happens. I hope you enjoyed the character of Oron as much as I did create him and giving him life while watching him grow throughout the novel.

If you liked what you read here or have any questions, comment below or send me an email and I’d be happy to chat with you!

[aion-rsa]

The Legend of Zelda: Are Zelda and Link Really Brother and Sister?

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In a recent look at the many unsolved mysteries and urban legends of the Legend of Zelda franchise, I briefly mentioned the idea that Zelda and Link are somehow related. At the time, I felt that the idea that those two characters could possibly be related was simply an urban legend. However, it’s since been pointed out that some interpretations of their relationship actually make that idea something closer to an unsolved mystery.

It sounds crazy, but what’s really crazy is that a deeper look into this subject reveals that the nature of Link and Zelda’s relationship throughout the years isn’t nearly as clear as it appears to be at a glance. Actually, if you spend enough time diving into this topic, you’ll not only start to see why people think that Link and Zelda are siblings; you may even start to convince yourself that it’s true. 

Is it true, though? Could two characters most commonly associated with an epic romance that spans hundreds of years of history really be related? Here’s what we know about the long-standing mystery that has sparked a seemingly endless debate. 

Princess Zelda Was Link’s Mom and Sister in a 1989 Manga (Kind Of)

Let’s start with one of the weirdest corners of the Zelda universe: the 1989 Legend of Zelda manga written and illustrated by Yuu Mishouzaki. 

In that manga, Princess Zelda XVI has a forbidden relationship with an elf warrior named Rune. The two have a child (who turns out to be Link), but because the King of Hyrule is apparently prejudiced against elves, they decide to have Impa raise their child in secret. Later, Princess Zelda XVI has another child named (appropriately enough) Zelda XVII. So, in a weird way, there’s one Princess Zelda in that universe who is Link’s mom and another who is Link’s half-sister.

So was any of that information used in the games? Well, those early manga stories were technically based on the original Zelda games, but you have to remember that they were loose adaptations of games that were fairly light on plot. Their writers had to fill in a lot of gaps and were clearly afforded a lot of creative freedom in their attempts to do so. Still, it’s easy to see why these mangas have been dismissed as non-canonical over the years. 

Interestingly, though, there are elements of these stories that did survive in later games. For instance, Zelda disguises herself as kind of a “tomboy” in one of the manga stories, which is an idea that we saw in Ocarina of Time years later. Another manga story suggests that Link is represented by a wolf in the Dark World, which is oddly similar to one of the core story/gameplay concepts of Twilight Princess.

Even if Nintendo has brushed aside those mangas as non-canonical over the years, that doesn’t mean they weren’t potentially inspired by some of their concepts when they were designing some of the future Zelda games. So was the idea that Link and Zelda are brother and sister one of those concepts? Well, that’s where things get even weirder and even more interesting…

A Link to The Past Created a Lot of Confusion About Link and Zelda’s Relationship

I mentioned this in my look at the various Legend of Zelda myths over the years, but it’s fascinating to see how many of the “Zelda and Link are brother and sister” rumors can be traced back to a Link to the Past. 

To reiterate, there’s a scene at the beginning of the U.S. version of A Link to the Past where we see Link’s uncle say “Zelda is your…” shortly before dying. The dialog of that same scene roughly translates into “Y-you are the princess’…” in the Japanese version of the game. Both of those statements certainly seem to leave the door open for the possibility that Link’s uncle was about to say the words “sister” and “brother.”

Years later, the Game Boy Advance version of A Link to the Past seemingly clarified this matter somewhat by turning the Uncle’s line into the much more informative “You must rescue Princess Zelda. Our people are fated to.” That new line appeared to make it clear that the original confusion was the result of a questionable translation and old-fashioned speculation.

Still, some fans insist that it’s possible the Link to the Past writers knew exactly what they were doing. While it’s a very, very loose theory, it’s not technically impossible that the writers were inspired by the manga interpretation of these characters and decided to at least leave the door open for the possibility that Link and Zelda are brother and sister. Still, we have no way of knowing if that was actually the case, and most of what happens next makes it seem highly unlikely that Nintendo seriously considered officially making Link and Zelda brother and sister in that, or any other, timeline.

Ocarina of Time Is Sometimes Cited as The Most Likely Instance of Zelda and Link Being Brother and Sister

While A Link to the Past is the most commonly cited piece of “evidence” in the Link/Zelda sibling relationship debate, it’s very much worth noting that Ocarina of Time comes the closest to embracing that idea (at least in the minds of many fans).

Simply put, there are several moments during Ocarina of Time’s ambiguous story that at least hint at the possibility that game’s version of Link and Zelda are separated siblings. For instance, we know that Link’s mother delivers him to the Deku tree when he was just a baby in order to save him from the horrors of an ongoing war. She died shortly thereafter. Because we also never see Zelda’s mother in that game (or hear much about her), it’s been suggested that Link’s mother could have been the queen of Hyrule.

Later in the game when Zelda and Link meet, Zelda has a line about how Link seems so familiar to her. On top of that, one of the Composer Brothers mentioned how Link reminds him of Zelda. That last line also touches on the fact that Zelda and Link were clearly designed to look very similar in that installment. Put it all together, and you certainly start to see how fans could jump to the conclusion that the two were separated at (or near) birth.

Those who support the theory that the version of Link and Zelda in Ocarina of Time could be related often clash with those who suggest that Ocarina of Time was the game that actually strongly suggested that the two ended up in a romantic relationship. Those two ideas aren’t necessarily independent of each other (as Game of Thrones proved), but they represent the two most popular interpretations of the characters’ relationships in the revolutionary N64 game. 

The fact of the matter is that the events of Ocarina of Time are open to a fair amount of speculation. Whether intentional or not, there are a lot of questions that this game doesn’t explicitly answer. You could play this game with the idea in your head that Link and Zelda are separated siblings, and the events of the game alone won’t necessarily shatter your perception of their relationship. 

Having said that, the evolution of the Zelda franchise’s storyline beyond this point strongly suggests that the idea that Zelda and Link are brother and sister in Ocarina of Time wasn’t intended to be as aggressively implied as some believe it was.

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Skyward Sword (the First Game in the Zelda Timeline) Established a Clear Romantic Relationship Between Zelda and Link

I’m willing to bet that the idea of Link and Zelda being related is most often immediately dismissed by those who assume that the two are eternally locked in a romantic relationship. Well, the truth of the matter is that kind of relationship is rarely forced into the Zelda games. Romance is sometimes implied, it’s sometimes denied, and it’s sometimes loosely stated, but few Zelda games are outright love stories. 

Interestingly, one glaring exception to that rule is the first game in the Zelda timeline: Skyward Sword. While it’s not the first game to suggests that Zelda and Link have a romantic relationship, it is the game that tells the clearest love story between the two in the history of the franchise.

With that information available, the question becomes “What does that tell us about Link and Zelda’s relationship in the rest of the series?” Well, considering that the Zelda timeline is one of the most confusing in all of gaming, the fact of the matter is that it’s difficult to say for sure. You also have to remember that the Zelda chronological timeline does not match the release order of the games themselves. That means that there could have been a time when Nintendo was open to the possibility of Link and Zelda being siblings or at least wanted to leave the idea open to interpretation. 

Having said that, the fact the two major Zelda games that precede Ocarina of Time (Skyward Sword and The Minish Cap) are also two of the games that emphasize the Zelda/Link love story the most would seem to imply that Nintendo eventually decided to really drive home the idea that the earliest versions of Link and Zelda were romantically connected on some level. The latter game implied more of a childhood romance but it was a romance nonetheless.

There are two ways you can interpret the Zelda/Link relationship we see in early games. The first suggests that future versions of Link and Zelda could be directly descended from the Skyward Sword couple. However, that interpretation requires a lot of leaps in logic in regards to what we actually do know about each character’s (largely separate) bloodlines and their roles in the grander lore of that universe. While the various Zeldas over the years are related by blood, only some versions of Link are directly related in such a traditional way.

It’s much more likely that Nintendo eventually decided to formally shut down the brother and sister talk by thematically introducing early examples of the Link and Zelda relationship which don’t necessarily lend themselves to that interpretation. 

Zelda Does Have A Brother, But He’s Rarely Mentioned

Link and Zelda’s families are rarely mentioned in any of the games (which is honestly a big part of the reason the “siblings” speculation exists), but there has been at least one notable reference to Zelda’s brother in the past. 

In Zelda II: The Adventure of Link a passing reference is made to Zelda’s brother: The Prince of Hyrule. It’s suggested in supplementary material that Zelda’s brother was either corrupted or possessed by a magician who eventually puts Zelda in the enchanted sleep we find her in at the start of the game. 

It’s not entirely clear what ultimately happens to the Prince of Hyrule, but that is really the only time that one of Zelda’s siblings is clearly featured (or at least referenced) in one of the Legend of Zelda games. Make of this information what you will, but Adventure of Link is one of the last games in the Zelda timeline. Then again, it may be more important to consider that Adventure of Link was always kind of an odd entry into the series. It influenced future games in the series in some ways, but it’s largely considered to be something of an anomaly across the board.

In the same way that many of Zelda 2’s gameplay ideas were abandoned by later games in the series, it’s entirely possible that Nintendo just never really liked the idea of Zelda having a brother or never felt the need to bring it up in any earlier games in the timeline. Then again, others argue that the implication that Zelda and Link are related in A Link to the Past and Ocarina of Time (the next two major Zelda games for Nintendo consoles) suggests that Nintendo was interested in preserving that idea or were at least still playing with it.

So are Zelda and Link Really Siblings? 

When you’re talking about The Legend of Zelda‘s various timelines, alternate timelines, and mythological mysteries, it’s hard to get a straight answer on anything. That being the case, there’s always at least a small possibility that Zelda and Link are related either directly or distantly in at least some of the games.

Having said that, so much of the evidence that sibling theory relies on is circumstantial and dependant on ideas introduced before Nintendo seemed especially concerned with the grander Zelda mythology. Granted, some would argue that Nintendo has never really cared about Zelda’s mythology and timeline, but it’s been made clear over the years that early Zelda games weren’t exactly designed to serve as the basis of some grand story Nintendo planned out years in advance. 

That being the case, the most likely answer to that question is that if Nintendo ever intended for Zelda and Link to be brother and sister, they probably changed their minds at some point. Another possible explanation suggests that they looked at the interpretations fans developed in response to Ocarina of Time’s ambiguous plot points and decided to more clearly define the Zelda and Link relationships in future games. 

Ultimately, though, Nintendo has never explicitly stated that Zelda and Link are brother and sister and the only instances where that idea has been explicitly stated in Zelda media are considered to be non-canonical.

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The more important point to keep in mind is that Zelda and Link are often destined to meet each other in every timeline regardless of the circumstances. The nature of their romantic or blood relationship has always been second to the idea that they’re tied together by destiny and powers that go beyond comparatively traditional relationships. 

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