#the older i get the more i appreciate my tiny hometown

[inkykeiji]

autumn is in the air!!! today i could feel it in the breeze and smell it in the wind. it was only 14 degrees outside and it truly felt like a fresh, crisp autumnal tuesday. my longing for the ber months has officially been ignited! i’m sooo excited for fall to arrive and everything it’ll bring with it; honeycrisp apple picking, trees full of golden leaves, my town’s little annual fair, etc etc etc. this year my boyfriend and i are going to try and watch more horror films in the month of october; particularly foreign horror, because there’s a few french and korean films that have been on our list for years now that we still haven’t gotten around to (*ﾉωﾉ)

anyway i stumbled across this lil patch of pretty pink flowers today and i wanted to share them, because i thought they were just the cutest things and they made me smile (ㅅ´ ˘ `) i hope they make you smile, too!

i sat by them for a little and watched a fuzzy lil bumble prance from flower to flower, working hard!! i took a picture of the bumble, too ehehe c: they’re below the cut, if you wanna see! εწз

[juju-or-anya]

I was creating an Excel spreadsheet with ideas for some Hannigram and Weyler one-shots I wanted to write for the upcoming months. When I reached December, my head got filled with fanfic ideas centered around "White Christmas" theme, but there's a tiny little problem: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT A "WHITE CHRISTMAS" IS.

Let me explain, where I live, December is summer, specifically in my hometown (not where I currently live, as I moved to another province for university), and it tends to reach 45°C, which is about 113°F in Fahrenheit. In other words, it's scorching hot, and there's nothing "white" about it. My Christmases are spent having a barbecue dinner at my grandma's place, which is a farmhouse outside the town of Tafi Viejo, in Tucumán. We sit about 4 meters away from the table, and there's a pool where we go to refresh ourselves every 20 minutes because our bodies sweat like crazy in the heat. After eating the barbecue and the additional 50 dishes brought by all the guests, we have Pan Dulce and sweet treats (candied peanuts, chocolates, nougat, "mantecol," and the best homemade Dulce de Leche ice cream). Then comes the toast, and we distract the kids with fireworks bought by the neighbors because my family doesn't spend money on fireworks. While the children are entertained with that, my uncle Andres dresses up as Santa Claus, and we place the gifts under the poorly decorated Christmas tree. We then open the presents, and as you grow older, receiving a bag of socks becomes a fortunate gift, as the Argentine economy is tight. That's a typical Christmas in Argentina.

Don't think that Argentinians don't celebrate; it's just that we do celebrate Christmas, but we don't make big plans. It's more about getting together with family and friends to have dinner and share. Come on the 25th of May or the 9th of July, or even during Carnivals. We love celebrations, but our Christmas isn't exactly white, starting with the fact that there's no snow, not even by chance.

I'm going to create headcanon where Hannigram and Weyler are Argentinians, popular, and patriotic.

This is my headcanon for my Argentinean versions of Hannigram:

In an alternate scenario, during a peaceful and picturesque Christmas, the mastermind of cannibalism, Hannibal Lecter, and the empathetic yet tormented detective, Will Graham, find a temporary and fascinating truce as they embark on an Argentinean barbecue in the midst of the holiday season. Both have put their usual disputes and problems aside, at least for the moment, and have decided to share a unique culinary experience. Hannibal, always a lover of fine cuisine, cannot help but be intrigued by the tradition of the Argentinean barbecue. Though accustomed to refined and elaborate dishes, he is drawn to the simplicity and artistry behind the barbecue. He delights in the idea of savoring top-quality cuts of meat, perfectly cooked on a grill. As he watches the expert grill masters prepare the meat, his eyes shine with genuine interest and appreciation for the skill of the Argentinean cooks. Will, on the other hand, has always been a man of simple tastes and a more tranquil nature. Although not as enthusiastic about meat as Hannibal, he appreciates the cultural and social connection surrounding the Argentinean barbecue. He immerses himself in the relaxed and friendly atmosphere around the grill and enjoys the sense of community that this tradition fosters. As the hours pass and the meats slowly cook, Hannibal and Will share deep and sincere conversations while enjoying the exquisite meals. Hannibal, always the skilled manipulator, finds in Will an unexpected companion, someone with whom he can share thoughts and emotions without fear of being judged for his darker nature. Will, on the other hand, finds a strange sense of peace and understanding in Hannibal's presence, an intellectual connection that, in some way, he comes to comprehend and accept. Both are surprised by the harmony they manage to find during this special evening. For a moment, they set aside their roles of hunter and hunted, and simply become two individuals sharing an unusual yet wonderful moment in their lives.

This is my headcanon for my Argentinean versions of Weyler:

Wednesday Addams, the charming and dark girl from the Addams family, lives in the old Gothic church in Recoleta, Autonomous City of Buenos Aires. Despite the unusual appearance and gloomy atmosphere of her home, Wednesday finds beauty in the darkness and peculiarity that surrounds her. She is a clever young woman, with a sharp wit and a fascination for the macabre and the strange. On the other hand, Tyler, the boy from Cululú, is kind and gentle, and he is the son of the town's police commissioner. Although his life in Cululú is more peaceful and conventional, he is drawn to the mysterious aura of Wednesday and her family. When they met, Wednesday found in Tyler a light in her darkness, while he found in her a sense of excitement and adventure he had never experienced before. Despite the differences in their worlds, Wednesday and Tyler discovered that they share a strange connection and a unique way of seeing life. Christmas in Cululú became a special occasion for them as they were able to blend Argentinean holiday traditions with the dark and enchanting touch of the Addams family. In Cululú, Wednesday and Tyler participated in the typical celebrations, but with a distinctive twist. They decorated the main square with gothic ornaments and candles instead of bright lights, and they enjoyed a Christmas dinner with exquisite dishes with sinister yet delicious names. In this way, Christmas in Cululú becomes a unique and enriching experience for everyone involved, with a charming blend of Argentinean traditions and the dark and peculiar touch of the Addams family. Together, they share laughter, adventures, and a special connection that transcends their differences and enriches their lives in a truly special and unique way.

I can't believe how much I'm laughing at this silliness I just created.

[casspurrjoybell-26]

The Contract - Chapter 23

*Warning: Adult Content*

It was my last day in my hometown just outside NY and I saved the best thing for last until I left to drive back home.

I walk down the halls of my old high school and so many good memories come flooding back when everything was perfect and my dad was alive and a teacher here.

I find my old locker and touch it, remembering the first day of school and my dad trying to talk to me in front of other students... I got so embarrassed that my dad was a teacher and that he was asking if I made friends yet.

Thinking back, he'd always been there and he'd always ask if I had a good day when nobody was around after that, realising it now, I was probably not the best son to him, even though he was always the best dad to me.

I walk down the hall until I reach his old classroom and then try my luck to open the door and then turn it only to see that it's unlocked.

I walk inside and admire how nothing has changed, everything was the same.

History.

I used to love listening to my dad talk about the great adventures of the world while keeping things fun so nobody fell asleep, it was one of the best lessons that every student looked forward to, just because of him and his enthusiasm to teach.

Sitting in my old seat, three rows from the front, next to the window, I sit down and take it all in as I look around, as so much nostalgia hits me about being here.

Those were good times, if only I appreciated them more, then maybe I'd have been nicer to him, told him I loved him more, that I was lucky he was my dad.

"Evan?" a soft voice says, startling me. "Oh heavens, I thought it was you."

My English teacher, Mrs. Rue comes over to me with her arms open wide as I get out of my seat and go over to her and wrap my arms around her tiny body.

"My, you are so tall now and still handsome I see," she says, patting my back and looking up at me. "How long has it been?" she asks a tear in her eye.

I laugh and look her over, seeing that she hasn't changed a single day, other than she's gotten older.

"Six years to be exact," I say, smiling widely, not thinking I'd bump into her. "What are you doing here on a Sunday?"

"I just came to get some things from my classroom." she waves me off, before smiling widely. "I retired on Friday, my thirty-th year of teaching I decided it was time to relax and spend some time with my daughter and grandkids."

Wait. Claire had children?

"I had no idea, congratulations on being a granny," I say cheekily. "When did Claire give birth?" I ask, following her as we head out of the classroom and into the halls.

"Two years ago," she smiles, remembering the day. "She has two boys now, married a lovely fellow, a doctor who works in the local hospital," she said, beaming with pride.

There was a moment of silence as I enter the hallway, looking around one last time before I drive back to the city.

"Richard would have been proud of you Evan. You've grown into a good man," she says, catching me by surprise as she smiles warmly at me. "We're all very proud of you."

"Not just a week ago I finished your show with my daughter but I'll have to admit now, I had to look away on a few occasions," she says, fanning her face, making me laugh out loud, knowing exactly what she's talking about, and what scenes.

"I should get going, it's a long drive back," I sigh, glad that I came as I hug her once more. "It's been good seeing you."

"Take care okay?" she rubs my back. "And don't be a stranger, you're always welcome at my home."

I pull away and smile.

"Thanks Rue."

After saying my goodbyes, I make my way back to my car and then shut the door, deciding to turn my phone on and check my messages, after not turning my phone on since Friday.

Coming alive, my phone blows up with missed calls, emails, texts and voicemails but despite the overwhelming hundreds of people trying to get into contact with me, one catches me off guard.

I knew this number. It was Donovan Steele's number.

I deleted his phone number a week after leaving Desire, even going as far as to send back everything he gave to me, that includes the laptop, phone and gym clothes I got from his private member gym.

Since then I'd not heard anything from him other than what premier he went to in the news or who he was currently dating but of course, those were just rumors, he'd never let the press get that information, he's too private.

Do I read it or do I delete it and just call Robbie and let him know I'm heading back, considering he left me a sizable amount of missed calls.

"Fucking hell," I mutter out, getting annoyed at myself.

I decide to phone Robbie before anyone else since he had left the most messages.

Robbie picks up almost instantly.

"Where the hell have you been?" he shouts out, panic in his voice. "I've been worried sick. I even phoned the police thinking you'd done something or worse, that something happened to you."

"I'll come to get you, where are you?" he asks again, hearing the sound of keys rattling in his hands. "I'll leave right now, I just need to find my shoes..."

I sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose.

"Rob, slow down, I'm fine. I just spent a few days back home to recharge my batteries. I'm fine, seriously," I tell him, rolling my eyes. "I was just about to drive back to the city."

Robbie sighs out loudly, making me wince, moving the phone from my ear.

"You should've told someone Evan, I've had people come to my apartment looking for you," he snaps angrily. "You can't just vanish like that, what if some crazy fan followed you there and kidnapped you? I'd have to find out about it from the news."

I snort at how that'd never happen.

"Now you're being ridiculous. I'm a grown man.

"What people came looking for me?" I ask curious, starting my car and putting my phone on the phone holder as I pull out of the school's parking lot whilst putting my seatbelt on.

The line goes quiet for a moment, making me wonder if he hung up on me.

"You still there, Rob?" I ask, turning onto the road back to the city.

"The police Evan. Someone broke into your apartment and trashed the place."

My eyes almost pop out of my head as I stare at my phone in confusion.

"What?"

"Yeah," he cringes. "Looks like they stole some things but I couldn't say for sure. The police wouldn't tell me much... but Evan, you should phone them, it's made the news and the fact you've been missing all weekend... just call them okay?"

My head starts pounding as I feel a headache coming on and I haven't even gotten back to the city yet.

Who the hell would break into my apartment?

"I'm on my way back. I'll call them as soon as I reach the city."

"Did they leave a number?"

"I'll text it to you," he says sighing in relief. "You're gonna be the death of me Evan," he adds, before ending the call.

Stopping at a red light, I put my head down on the wheel and groan out, so annoyed that it's barely been two days and something like this happened.

I glance at my phone and decide to open the text message from Donovan because let us face it, life couldn't get any more dramatic or worse.

When I open his text, my chest tightens as I read out his text, not understanding why he's contacting me now, after so long.

ᴅᴏɴᴏᴠᴀɴ: Please get in contact with me, I need to know you're safe.

[sarochaaiyakorn]

Enjoy the moment in life

It's been around two and a half months since I moved to Australia. Can you believe it? This is my first time ever travelling and living abroad all by myself. I thought it wouldn't be that tough to adjust to a new place since I've been on my own since I was 13, thanks to my parents shipping me off to boarding school. So, I figured I was strong enough to handle this new adventure solo. And guess what? I was kinda right! Except for the fact that I'm still struggling with the accent here lol But that's not really why I'm writing today.

Being here has opened my eyes to how small and limited my hometown was. I grew up in a tiny little town where there wasn't much diversity in terms of races and cultures. You know, back there, graduating from university was seen as the ultimate sign of success, and yeah, I did it to make my family proud and finally feel proud of myself. But when you move to a new country with zero skills and realize that your precious degree means absolutely nothing, no matter how smart or successful you were back home, it's a reality check. All those achievements suddenly don't mean squat. So, I left my ego at the airport gate. No need to carry that baggage with me because it won't take me anywhere. I've become more humble and laid-back. I'm willing to try things I've never done before because that's what I came here for. I wanted to experience life without my parents constantly watching over me. Not that I don't want them around, but I just needed to grow up. They can't hold my hand forever, so I asked them to send me here to give it a shot.

Luckily, my cousin has been living here for a while, so I got the chance to meet some really cool people through him. They've been super helpful with finding a job and settling in. I also made a friend in my class and at the place where I applied for my new job. It's amazing how the universe can surprise you when you least expect it, right? I may not have a huge group of friends, but the few I've got are awesome, and I appreciate them a lot. As I'm getting older, I'm finding more peace in spending time alone or just chilling with a small circle of friends, and that's totally fine with me. I think I've changed for the better since I've been here, and even though it's only been a short while, I've already learned so much. But you know what? I'm still learning, and I think I'll keep learning my whole life because that's what life's all about, isn't it? Some people may not agree with me, but I couldn't care less. This is the way I've chosen to live my life, and nobody can tell me otherwise. Life is a journey, filled with ups and downs, laughter and tears, and I'm ready to keep moving forward and enjoying every bit of it.

[floralseokjin]

⊶ final sleigh (m). ⊷

You took an (almost) immediate dislike to Seokjin during his first week at the office and six months later that distaste is not only still going strong, but also mutual. Working in sales, you view one another as competition, so what happens when you’re forced to organise the Christmas office party together? It’s a recipe for disaster, but one thing’s for sure, it doesn’t end the way you imagined it...

(Spoiler alert: you don’t wind up murdering him.)  

pairing; kim seokjin x reader  au/genre/warnings; workplace/office au, enemies/rivals to lovers, starts off as a holiday au but drabbles further develop the story, rom-com, hoseok, namjoon, jungkook and yoongi make appearances, smut; drunk grinding, drunk kissing, workplace (oral) sex, storeroom (oral) sex, oral sex (male & female receiving), fingering, dirty talk, jin has a big dick (obv) words; 23,363 

continuing drabbles found here

Every year without fail you organised the office Christmas party at Jung&Co. As part of the office party committee it was of course a given. There were only two of you but as a workplace of just 12 that was ample enough. This year however, things were a little different, no matter how marginally. Joy was on maternity leave so you were now on your own this time around. Not that you minded. You could hold the fort no problem until she came back in January and you had to plan Creed, the quality assurance director’s birthday party. 

Only Hoseok, your manager didn’t see it that simple. Insisted you needed an extra set of helping hands. Who? Was your first thought. No one had ever offered to help in the past three years and why would they start now? However, you were forgetting something… or should you say, someone. A new someone who you were sure had been transferred here to make your life a total misery. It was like someone up there had it in for you, and you couldn’t think of one explanation why. You were a good person; you donated to a cat shelter every month, you paid your taxes, you were always helpful and friendly, amazing at your job… The list went on. In fact, you were the best damn sales rep at this branch, high above the rest – Well… That was until he showed up. 

“I’ll do it.” You heard Seokjin offer indifferently, as if he didn’t care a damn about the Christmas party. You knew he didn’t. 

You swung around immediately, your chair squeaking against the wooden flooring with the force. You scoffed patronisingly. “Pfft. You?” You had never heard anything so unbelievable in your whole life. 

Seokjin regarded you from where he sat in the back row. Hoseok had called a meeting this morning, needing to find a replacement for Joy as time was creeping up. it was a month until Christmas closure. The day the party was held, and he knew how much you liked to keep on top of things. You weren’t to be rushed. 

“Yes. Me.” Of course he was smirking. “Why? Got a problem?”

Beside him, Jungkook the intern, looked between you both unsurely. No doubt the rest of your co-workers were too. This had become the norm now. They stayed silent every time you and he started squabbling. The past few months had been one big whirlwind of bickering and rivalry. Seokjin was your biggest competition. He was also the thorn in your side. Ever since he’d transferred branches from his hometown six months ago life in the office hadn’t been the same for you. It didn’t help that your desks were also situated next to one another. You had to sit opposite his annoying face 8 hours a day, five days a week. It was a living hell. And now you’d be forced to spend even more time with him? Over your dead body. 

“No.” You folded your arms, still looking over at him from where you sat in the front. He wouldn’t win. You wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing he was successfully getting to you. “You want to organise the office Christmas party?”

Of course you were calling his bluff. He was 100% doing this to piss you off. You were certain. 

He chuckled. “I don’t know why it’s so unbelievable.”

You scoffed, growing frustrated. “You’re a guy!”

He raised one of his eyebrows. “Excuse me? Is that sexism I detect?” One corner of his mouth twitched. “Do I have to report you to Tim?”

Tim, the HR rep went to speak up, no doubt trying to pacify the situation, but already out of hand, you spoke over him, voice shrill. “Oh shut up, Seokjin.” Damn it, you’d bitten, hadn’t you? He was holding back his laughter. He knew what you meant. Your wording came out wrong, so you needed to correct yourself. 

“I’m just saying, you don’t seem like a guy who loves to party plan in his spare time.”

He grinned widely, as smug as ever. “Well, I’m full of surprises, baby.�� 

Unimpressed you stared him down. “Do I need to report you to Tim for harassment?” 

You weren’t paying attention to Tim this time around but no doubt he looked lost. He was an older, quiet man who seemed unsure what he was doing here most of the time. Seokjin didn’t help matters. 

“For what?” He exclaimed. “Calling you baby? It’s a term of endearment.” 

“Not from you it isn’t.” 

Jungkook sniggered at that and you felt a little smug. Seokjin went to open his mouth, no doubt a clever comeback hot on his tongue, but Hoseok interrupted. 

“Guys. Stop bickering or neither of you will be planning this party.” 

You immediately spun around, facing the front. Seokjin wasn’t fucking this up for you. Although you didn’t think Hoseok would ever take that role away from you. He might have been your manager – and the CEO’s son – but you saw him as a friend. He never threw his authority around. 

You crossed your arms as his attention fell to Seokjin, silently huffing. “Jin, please tell us why you nominated yourself.” 

“Well,” he started his spiel, laying it on thick. You refused to look his way, even as everyone else in the conference room gave him their attention. “I love Christmas and I love organising things.” He made it sound so simple. Infuriating bastard. “I was always the person they counted on back home. I know how to throw a paaar-tayyyy!” 

At his holler, he and Jungkook gave one another a high five, whooping at each other like a pair of idiots. It was impossible to think that Seokjin was the same age as you, a whole five years older than Jungkook. They obviously shared the same mental age. 

“Well you’re not back home now.” You couldn’t help yourself, whipping around to tell him what was what. “I’m the one in charge here. I have the final say.” Sneering, you added, “You’d just be the help.”

Seokjin’s jaw twitched. You were irritating him now. You took great joy in that. “Hoseok said it was 50/50.” 

“More like 75/25 where you’re concerned.” 

“In my favour, yes.”

You felt your anger flare. “Hoseokkk,” you whined, turning your back to Seokjerk. “You can’t be serious letting him join the party planning committee?” 

You knew he was doing it on purpose. He had no interest in helping you – he just wanted to annoy you, to take over. 

Hoseok looked at you sympathetically. “Do you see anyone else offering to help, Y/N? Besides, it’s just for Christmas.” When you didn’t relent, he sighed. “You can’t do it all on your own.” 

You held your arms tight across your chest, pouting like a big kid. “Watch me.” 

“Impossible,” he chuckled softly. “You should be thanking Seokjin for being so helpful.” 

Men. They were all traitors. Of course Hoseok would be in Seokjin’s favour, they once worked together back at the other branch just before Hoseok became manager here. 

“Yeah, Y/N,” Seokjin called. You just knew he had that shit eating grin spread across his face, the one that plagued your nightmares – You could hear it in his tone. “You should be thanking me. But take your time, I know admitting defeat is hard for you.” 

You breathed deeply through your nose, reminding yourself to stay calm, else he’d end up throttled by the time this party rolled around… 

“Chop, chop!” 

From your peripheral you could see Seokjin stood over you, clapping his hands, his crotch obscenely eye level. You pursed your mouth and continued typing up your report that needed to be in by today. You couldn’t bear to look at him, still mad from yesterday, and no doubt he just wanted to annoy you some more – his sole purpose it seemed. What a sad little life he lived. 

“Y/N,” he prompted. You bit the inside of your cheek, exhaling through your nose. He wasn’t relenting, but lucky for you, lunch was in just over an hour. You could grin and bear him until then, surely? 

“What?” You snapped, beginning to turn your head. 

“We have our first meeting in five.” 

You mouth grew dry as you made eye contact, but it wasn’t because of what he said, actually you barely had time to register it, his pearly whites pretty much dazzling you as he grinned. 

You might have forgotten to mention a tiny detail about Seokjin, one you tried your best to forget, and tiny it was because it barely had an effect on you… Begrudgingly, you had to admit he was objectively handsome. Before you had taken that almost instantaneous dislike to him six months ago, you will confess that the first sighting of him had turned you a little weak at the knees. You were only human after all and you could appreciate a good looking face when you saw one. He even made Beryl and Michelle, who well into their sixties, giddy with a simple Good Morning – and he knew it. He knew how hot he was, which for you, just added to his overall lack of appeal. 

However, sometimes he caught you off guard. 

Like now. 

You swallowed with some difficulty, willing saliva to coat the inside of your mouth, and ignoring the way the crisp white dress shirt hugged his waist, tucked into those very well fitting black pants of his (maybe too well fitting…), you let his words piece together. 

“…Meeting?” 

You furrowed your eyebrows slightly, what was he talking about? Hoseok hadn’t announced anything this morning. Was he just messing with you? You weren’t Jungkook. Those two might love playing pranks on one another, but you were actually mature in the workplace.

At the thought of Jungkook, you could hear him giggling up at the front of the office with the receptionist, Mina. How Hoseok hadn’t gathered they were sleeping together yet was beyond you. Actually, you were sure the rest of the office were slow to catch on too, but you maybe you had a clear (dis)advantage. You had to hear him and Seokjin discussing it more or less every single day – because men were dense and didn’t realise that no matter how low they spoke, a metre distance would not stop you from overhearing. 

“Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten about the Christmas party already?” Seokjin continued to grin – and that’s when you realised it wasn’t of the friendly kind. It was of the provoking kind, because he wanted to piss you off. “I thought this was your area of expertise.” 

You could feel your blood beginning to boil, your work forgotten on the screen. “You called a meeting without telling me?” 

He shrugged. “What am I doing right now?” What, mere seconds before it started? You really were going to end up killing him one of these days. “I booked the conference room this morning.” 

You grit your teeth together. “I organise the meetings.” 

“Get a life.” He scoffed, judging you hard. “Besides, you’re a bit slow on the ball, aren’t you?” 

“The party isn’t for another month.” 

“Three weeks and 6 days actually,” he corrected. Then with a wink, he added, “I like being on top of things.” 

You ignored his shitty (and inappropriate) innuendo with a roll of your eyes. “I was going to wait until Monday.” How dare he suggest you were unorganised. 

With another lazy roll of his shoulders, he started to walk off, towards the small conference room situated in the office. “You snooze you lose.” Turning back casually, he pointed a finger to your desk. “Bring a notebook.” 

Trying to laser through him with your best death glare you grabbed your notebook and stood up. He was treading on thin ice. 

.

.

“This thing sounds dry as the Sahara,” Seokjin wailed loudly, hanging his head towards his (blank) notebook on the desk. 

“Well you know where the door is,” you smiled. “I’m perfectly capable of organising this party on my own.” 

Actually, if he didn’t like how you celebrated Christmas here, he could leave entirely. You wouldn’t miss him, and the others would surely get over it. You didn’t understand why they thought he was so amazing anyway. His sense of humour was grating to say the least – as well as his overall personality. He was nothing but a glorified salesman who walked the walk and talked the talk. You actually cared about your clients. All he cared about was numbers to help him boast, even if that meant stealing –

Never mind. That was in the past. You were the bigger person, you reminded yourself. 

“I’m not going anywhere,” Seokjin scoffed, turning to look at you. He’d insisted you sat next to him even though you had been quite happy to sit at the furthest end of the table. “This place needs some Seokjin zest. Add a little flavour – a little spice.” 

You dropped your head, muttering arrogant bastard under your breath as you picked up your pen to start brainstorming some ideas. 

“What was that?” He asked, obviously hearing you. 

You played dumb. “What was what?”

Thankfully, for the next ten minutes a very much welcomed silence fell over you as you both jotted down some ideas, although you were pretty sure Seokjin was just doodling at this point. Probably stickmen like the five year old he was. In between planning you threw a few texts your best friend’s way. 

(12:14pm) You: Remind me why we tolerate men again?  (12:15pm) Ana: For their dicks  (12:15pm) Ana: But only if they’re pretty and they know how to use it  (12:15pm) Ana: What’s up? (12:17pm) You: Guess who organised the first Christmas party meeting without telling me first 🙂 (12:18pm) Ana: Oh (12:19pm) You: Exactly  (12:19pm) Ana: Dick cheese   (12:20pm) Ana: Definitely not tolerable

You snorted at the mention of Seokjin’s nickname. Ana knew all about your very vocal disdain for the guy – in fact, she’d had to hear it all over again last night when you’d called her to complain about the very unfortunate turn in Christmas party planning events. 

“Is that work or party related?”

Frustratingly, your obvious amusement had caught Dick cheese’s attention. “Shut up,” you muttered, but you did hide your phone from view, placing it screen down on the table. Hopefully he hadn’t caught a glimpse at anything dick and cheese related. He was definitely the type to report you to Tim for workplace bullying. 

You turned to look at him, childishly taking great pleasure in the way a piece of his brown hair had bunched up on top of his head – probably from where’d he’d been itching, racking his pea-sized brain for ideas. He hadn’t noticed, and you weren’t going to point it out. He’d realise soon enough when he had to use the restroom – unless he didn’t wash his hands afterwards, which wouldn’t surprise you. 

“We’re in a meeting, save texting your boyfriend for lunch.” 

“I’m not texting – never mind.” You stopped yourself. There was no point biting. He wanted you to do that, knowing the insinuating tone he’d used would surely get you mad. As if you’d ever have a boyfriend, ha ha, very funny and original – NOT. He needed better jokes. 

“If you were actually bringing something to the table I wouldn’t be bored enough to get distracted,” you shot instead. 

He looked wholeheartedly offended. “I’m not the only one involved in this. You think of some ideas.” 

“I have been.” You replied loudly. “It’s the same process every year, okay? Theme, food and Secret Santa. That’s all we need to organise.” You’d already been through this. 

“So fucking boring,” he groaned slowly. 

“You’re wrong.” 

He snorted, visibly amused by your insistence. “And that Y/N, is why you are a square.” 

“You don’t even know me!” You exclaimed. 

“I know enough. I’ve sat opposite you for the past six months.” 

“Yeah, and don’t I know it,” you muttered. You had not known peace since. 

He laughed then, surprising you enough to make you jump a little. “Babe, are you ever going to forgive me for Rosal & Steinar?”

You glared at him. How dare he bring that up. It was a very sensitive topic, one you wanted to forget about because each time it popped up inside your brain you wanted to kick him – aggressively and relentlessly. 

Seokjin’s first week here had not been good for you. First, he had made you weak at the knees by just casually existing, then, Hoseok had introduced him as Jung&Co.’s best salesperson, and lastly, after being struck down with a terrible cold, you’d been sent home from work on the morning of your biggest client’s renewal day. Hoseok had insisted that you couldn’t sell stationary without a voice. You had claimed you could, but it wasn’t good enough. You were sick and needed to go before you infected anyone else. 

The following Monday, still snorting sinus spray like it was cocaine, you’d arrived at work to find out that Rosal & Steinar had renewed their contract… with Seokjin. Life couldn’t have been going anymore wrong. In the past month you’d had to deal with the guilt of breaking off a two year relationship, acquiring a new competition in your place of work that had ultimately already lost you your best client, and you’d gotten sick for the first time in four years. 

You blamed Seokjin. He’d been sent to curse you. (Although, admittedly the breakup had happened before you’d known of his existence… Not that it mattered.) 

That’s why it was now your life’s goal to become Jung&Co.’s best salesperson, because Hoseok’s opinion didn’t mean shit, and one way or another you were going to take down Seokjin. 

So yeah, no matter how much you insisted that the past was in the past, it obviously wasn’t. 

You raised an eyebrow, choosing to ignore his question. “What did I say about reporting you?” You weren’t his babe. Or baby. Or whatever else he liked to use. 

“Sorry,” he apologised, rather genuinely at that, which was surprising. “It was a slip of the tongue.”

You let out a short sigh. “Let’s just get on with this. There’s half an hour until lunch and I need to leave on time to meet my friend.” Neither of you had thought of anything solid yet. 

“Is that who you were messaging?” 

Seokjin seemed curious – interested? You couldn’t think of the correct word. Either way he was getting too friendly and pushing boundaries you’d rather not have him cross. “Is that any of your business?”

He shrugged, unaffected, and got back down to business. “Why can’t we just rent out a venue? Nothing is fun without any booze.” 

“We don’t do that anymore,” you answered. 

“How come?” 

You inwardly groaned. You didn’t really want to get into it, this meeting had already been a complete and utter flop, but you guessed if you told him why you no longer celebrated outside of office hours he’d understand and shut up about the damn office party. 

“It was a while ago. Before Hoseok was manager.” You began. “We used to all have Christmas lunch and then go out for drinks… and it was fun, don’t get me wrong,” you emphasised, knowing that he was just itching to call you boring. “But the last time we did it, our manager at the time ended up sleeping with the married receptionist and –”

“Mina?!” Seokjin exclaimed, interrupting story time. 

“No, not Mina,” you cried. As if Jungkook would be oblivious to the fact she was married, but then again, he was pretty dumb. He’d been here eight months already and still didn’t know how to photocopy properly. 

“Before her.” You stressed, noticing the shock on Seokjin’s face disappear. “They were both wasted but it was still no excuse. Her husband found out, charged into the office Monday morning.” 

“Oh, fuck.” Seokjin chuckled, obviously enjoying the drama. 

“He was ready to fight but it didn’t end well, because… our manager was a black belt.” 

You winced at the memory, remembering that morning very well. The initial shock, the screams, your manager morphing into the Hulk… the punches… the blood… It was crazy to say the least, and after Christmas you never saw the man again. Devin, the CFO, informed you he’d “moved on” by his own willing but you didn’t really believe that. Hoseok was his replacement. Mina was hired shortly after when Kevin couldn’t handle the stress of being an accountant and a receptionist on the side. 

“Brilliant,” Seokjin laughed, clapping his hands together. “So, the guy who’d gotten cheated on had the shit kicked out of him in front of the whole office?”

“Pretty much,” you nodded, still feeling a little sad for the man even though it was three years ago now – and you didn’t even know his name. “Ever since then it’s been a buffet in the conference room kind of thing.” 

Looking over at Seokjin then, you suddenly had the urge to add, “It’s safer. No one ends up fucking that way.” 

His eyes bulged and he broke into a little cough at the shock of the word falling from your mouth so easily, choking on his own laugh. “Fuck…” He went to repeat, only petering off last minute, shaking his head in disbelief.

You tried not to feel smug about it but you couldn’t help it. Lame, yes you were. 

“Fine,” Seokjin sighed, resignation in his tone. “Stupid fricking office party it is.” 

“I’m glad that we finally agree on something.” 

He just rolled his eyes at you. 

The next couple of weeks went by quite fast and slowly, in between work, you and Seokjin actually got somewhere with the party planning – surprisingly. At first he’d been adamant to separate each job between you, but that was only because he wanted to be in charge of the theme. You’d point-blank refused. As much as you hated it, you needed to work together as a team, so that meant making decisions together. Star Wars at Christmas wasn’t exactly something you agreed on, but neither was Christmas cats. (“You need to get laid ASAP”, had been his words when you’d suggested such an idea… but he didn’t really have a leg to stand on as a Star Wars fan, so…). 

Finally, after just over a week of brainstorming (and bickering), you decided on something: Family Christmas. It wasn’t the most original idea, but it was something, and you’d already thought of a bunch of things to do ready for it, which involved Jungkook getting his camera out and everyone dressing up in their holiday pyjamas. 

It was a Monday afternoon right now, an hour until you went home for the day, and you and he were making use of some spare time you had – making a list of all the decorations you needed to purchase. He’d dragged his chair over to your desk which you weren’t very happy about but what could you do? Sometimes sacrifices had to be made, especially when it came down to Christmas. 

“It was my birthday over the weekend,” Seokjin told you casually. 

“Oh, was it?” 

You could feel his gaze on your face as you scribbled down in your notebook. “Didn’t you see on Facebook? Everyone was wishing me happy birthday.” 

“Were they?” You said impassively, now aware he was itching for some attention. “I don’t go on there that much.” Why you’d accepted his friend request still baffled you, but you were always the bigger, better person in life. Plus, you’d stopped logging in months ago. 

There was a pause. Ahh, lovely, silence. What bliss –

“I mentioned it Friday too.” 

You sighed, turning to look at him. “Happy belated birthday, Seokjin. I hope you had a good day.” 

He grinned. There it was, what he’d been after. He was such a kid. “Thanks. I did actually, I went –”

“Is Hoseok around?” 

Your attention was stolen by the sound of someone’s voice – Namjoon’s voice, and you looked to the reception desk to see him stood beside it. You swooned a little at the sight of him; legs long enough to climb, a butt hard enough to crack walnuts with – chest too. Namjoon was the foreman of the warehouse on the ground floor. He was handsome, charming, and genuinely a nice person. You hadn’t seen him for a while, so you were definitely caught by surprise.  

“Yeah, he’s in his office,” Mina replied with a smile, watching his ass as he turned and started walking away. You didn’t blame her. 

“Hi, Y/N.” He gave you a dazzling smile as he noticed you, bypassing your boss’ office to make his way over. 

“Hi, Joon.” You greeted, unable to stop smiling like an idiot. “How are you?”

“Busy, he shrugged. Leaning in, you felt your pulse begin to quicken. “You don’t go clubbing anymore? I haven’t seen you around.” 

“Ana got pretty bored of it.” 

That was a lie actually. One you’d thought of on the spot. It wasn’t that you disliked going out, although you did feel too old for it now – the hangovers just kept getting worse – but when you’d started meeting up with Namjoon and his friends in the summer you’d been on a little Quest for Fun. You blamed it on the breakup. Now that you were over it, and had been for quite some time, clubbing wasn’t near as appealing as it used to be. You much preferred staying in and sitting in front of the television. 

“That shouldn’t stop you. I can always be your company if you’re lonely,” he smirked, that pesky dimple sending your heart a flutter. He always did this. Flirting came so natural to him, he was great at it. 

You heard someone clearing their throat to the side of you. Namjoon and you both looked over at the same time. Oh, right… Seokjin was here. You’d actually forgotten about him. 

“Hey, man,” Namjoon smiled politely. They didn’t know each other too well, but that didn’t stop Namjoon from being friendly. He looked down at your notebook. “What are you guys up to?” 

The question was definitely directed to you but Seokjin answered anyway. “Organising the office Christmas party.” 

“Ahhh.” Namjoon nodded, smirking your way, Seokjin once again forgotten. “Do I get an invite?” 

You smiled, raising an eyebrow. “Don’t you always?” He and the guys downstairs always popped up and joined in on the celebrations, but yes, okay, maybe you were flirting too… You couldn’t help it, not after what happened last –

“Namjoon?”

Hoseok’s voice interrupted your thoughts and you looked over Namjoon’s shoulder, seeing him stood in his doorway. 

Namjoon sighed, taking a step backwards. “I gotta go, business calls, beautiful. See you around.” Turning his back to you he started to walk off, only to glance over his shoulder last minute, shooting you a wink. “Remember, if you’re ever feeling lonely…” 

You giggled, giving him a wave and watched him follow Hoseok into his office. 

“What was that?” Seokjin asked, sounding absolutely baffled. 

“What was what?” You shot, now realising you’d turned to mush right in front of him. 

“That,” he exclaimed. “You and Namjoon all over one another.” He paused to pull a face. “I’ve come all over all queasy.”

“Shut up,” you brushed off. “We weren’t.” 

He looked at you as if you’d gone mad. “The looks! The winking. The way your voice went all high-pitched… Do you like him?”

“As a friend,” you stressed. Although, what was it to him?! 

He stared at you. “So nothing’s going on between the two of you?”

“No.” 

“You expect me to believe that?”

“I don’t expect you to do anything,” you shook your head, laughing in confusion. “I don’t care if you believe me or not.” 

Seokjin dropped it thankfully and you got back to your list, jotting down a few more things you needed. It was until Namjoon reappeared from Hoseok’s office and waved goodbye to you that Seokjin couldn’t contain himself any longer. 

“What?” You demanded when you heard him scoff to himself. 

“He definitely wants to fuck you.” He shook his head. “Trust me. I have a males sixth sense when it comes to that.” 

You could feel yourself growing mad. That’s why you ultimately ended up spilling. As stupid as it was. “Maybe he already has…”

It took a moment for Seokjin to make sense of your words. “W-what?” You could physically see when the penny dropped, it was actually quite amusing. You liked making him speechless. “You and Namjoon already… When?!”

You shrugged, feeling mildly embarrassed. “It was during the summer.” You tried to think of more things you’d need for this party but your mind was now a blur and Seokjin wouldn’t let you anyway.  

“You can’t just drop that and not give me details,” he cried. 

“Keep your voice down,” you hissed. Nobody knew bar Ana. Who had been the with you the night you and Namjoon had hooked up. It wasn’t exactly a secret, but you didn’t want the whole office knowing your business. 

Seokjin looked at you wide-eyed, patiently – or not so – waiting for you to explain yourself. You grumbled, not quite believing you were about to tell him, you didn’t want him knowing your business, but then again, it was a great feeling knowing that you’d shocked him. “I’d just… I’d just broken up with my boyfriend and I wanted to… let loose a little. It was just a one time thing.” 

But it had been good – amazing, actually. A repeat had never shown itself, but you were happy enough for it to be a onetime thing. 

“You have one night stands?” Seokjin asked, although you were sure it was rhetorical. 

“It happened once.” 

He wasn’t listening. “And here I was thinking you were a prude.” 

“Like I said before, you don’t know me.” 

Seokjin chuckled, amused by your attitude. It sent your insides a little jittery – but only for a split second – and it could’ve very well been annoyance. “So… How was it?”

“Excuse me?”

“How was the sex?”

“I’m not answering that,” you refused. 

“Why not?” He looked puzzled. “What’s a bit of hook up talk amongst friends?”

“Friends?” You repeated with a chortle. “Good one.” 

He ignored you. “Come on. I’ll tell you about the sex I had over the weekend. Birthday sex is always the best. One hook up story for another.” 

You pulled a face, unsure why the idea of Seokjin getting in on was so unpleasant, but then he laughed. It was loud, and partly squeaky. Contagious too. You couldn’t help but join in. “Go away.” You whined, pushing at his shoulder. You were not going into detail, palming him off. “I can’t even remember it.”

“Ouch.” Seokjin sniggered. “Don’t tell him that. It seems like he thinks about it every goddamn night.”

Pfftt. You doubted that. “I mean, it was ages ago.” 

“That shouldn’t matter, babe,” Seokjin tutted. “You never forget a good time.” 

“Are you purposely trying to be an asshole?” If he called you babe one more time, you swore to God…

“I’m not trying.” He smirked, face falling as he realised that hadn’t been worded correctly. “…Wait.” 

Okay then, he was just a natural asshole. Good to know. 

Begrudgingly, you had to admit you and Seokjin made a pretty good team once you put aside your issues with one another. With the theme decided, it was easy enough to get everything in place. Jungkook took the “family” photos you needed of the staff and you went to get them professionally printed, shoving them in frames ready to place around the office in preparation. Seokjin found a lot of the decorations needed, which was actually very helpful of him. You were so impressed you even agreed to let him decorate the conference room all by himself when the time came. The office was already overflowing with tinsel, the Christmas tree up, but the conference room was always left for the day of the party, the last Friday before the company closed for Christmas. 

Secret Santa had been organised too. Quite unfortunately you’d pulled out Seokjin’s name (see, you were cursed,) but you’d bought the first pair of cufflinks you’d found in the department store last week, so you didn’t have to worry about that for long. All that was left now was the buffet. And that’s how you found yourself sat in Seokjin’s kitchen on a Friday night, a week to go until D-Day… 

There hadn’t been time to look over the restaurant’s menu in work hours, and you’d given up trying to organise things over Skype with him. The first and last time you’d tried that, Seokjin had added Jungkook into the call, both of them getting ready to game. It had been a mess to say the least, so the only other option was to meet up after work. Seokjin had been the first to invite you over, so here you were. It wasn’t as if you purposely didn’t want him to step foot inside your home. He wasn’t that bad. 

His apartment wasn’t either… He lived with his best friend, an interior architect, which made a lot of sense once Seokjin told you. Unless you were confusing it for an interior designer, which you probably were – either way, this place was cool. And spotless. It smelt nice too. Always a plus. 

You were halfway done picking through the menu when his phone started ringing. You noticed him hesitate, as if he wondering if he should pick up but ultimately decided to after a few rings. 

“Hey mom,” he greeted, glancing over at you to mouth sorry. 

You shook your head to tell him it was okay and pulled out your phone from your hoody pocket, taking the break to scroll through social media. A text pinged through from Ana, wondering what dress she should wear tomorrow night when you went out for drinks. Every year you went out just before Christmas, despite how much you complained. It was mandatory now, but undeniably Ana took it a lot more serious than you. You had no idea what you’d be wearing tomorrow and wouldn’t until an hour before the Uber came to get you. 

“I know that, but I just can’t leave him,” Seokjin sighed beside you. You paused, having never heard him sound quite like that before. He sounded… serious for one. And frustrated. You replied to Ana quickly, trying your best not to overhear anymore – which was difficult. You were practically brushing shoulders at the kitchen table. 

“I don’t think he wants to come. He said he doesn’t even want to celebrate this year.” 

Again, you were doing a terrible job at this. Whatever this was about, you were beginning to feel rude listening in. But then again, if Seokjin didn’t want you to hear then surely he would’ve stepped into the living room. You were being a goddamn worrier. 

“Okay, I’ll speak to you soon, bye. Love you.”

Love you? Seokjin told his mom he loved her? The revelation caught you off guard, forgetting that he was off the phone now and as you heard him clear his throat, shoving the device into his sweatpants pocket, you jumped, copying and slipping yours back inside your hoody. 

“Sorry about that,” he apologised. “It was my mom.” 

“It’s fine.” You reassured. He sounded a little dejected all of a sudden, a far cry from ten minutes ago when he’d been laughing over the word vol-au-vent. You hesitated, wondering if you should ask if everything was okay? You felt a little awkward, as if you were pushing boundaries, but surprisingly he told you himself without any prompting. 

“She really wants me to come home for Christmas but I can’t leave Yoongi.” He definitely sounded exasperated now. 

“Yoongi?” You repeated, a little lost. 

Seokjin glanced at you, narrowing his eyes as if he was trying to guess if you were messing around or not. “My best friend…” He said slowly. “Y’know, the one I live with…” 

“Oh.” 

You fool. Now it looked like you hadn’t been listening to him. You had been, you really had, the name just slipped your mind momentarily. After only an hour… “Sorry,” you murmured. 

He shrugged, carrying on. “I kinda owe him one.” 

“How come?” The menu now laid forgotten. 

Seokjin sighed. “It’s kind of a long story.” You waited to see if he’d care to explain, although of course he didn’t have to if he didn’t want to. “His girlfriend broke up with him about a month ago and he’s been pretty cut up ever since.” 

He wanted to. You listened politely, aware this was the first time either of you’d had a conversation very much deemed as serious.   

“I’m going to stay here with him because well,” he hesitated, glancing at you briefly. He seemed a little embarrassed but decided to continue. “He let me move in with him after my ex and I split up. He was there for me so it’s only fair that I’m there for him.” He finished with a rushed smile, reaching to rub the back of his neck bashfully.

The action was pretty endearing. 

“Is that why you transferred?” You asked, aware the conversation was straying but you couldn’t help it. The surprise of finding out he’d moved here after the breakdown of his relationship was distracting to say the least. You’d always pegged Seokjin as a guy who’d never been in a serious relationship – judgemental, yes, but they were the type of vibes he gave out. Maybe you just couldn’t imagine him settled down and in love. He was such a free spirit, never serious enough – although, right now he was... 

Possibly, you didn’t know him at all…

Seokjin nodded. “Yeah, I wanted a fresh start. Yoongi said this city was nice, so.” 

There was a beat of silence and afraid it would become awkward you rushed to say something of worth. “Break ups are tough.” 

God, that sounded a lot cheesier than you intended. 

“They are,” he agreed. “Although... I don’t know how yours went – mine was okay, sad but mutual. We just didn’t love each other anymore. Yoongi’s on the other had… He got cheated on.” 

“That sucks.” You empathised, before shrugging softly. “Mine was okay too. As break ups go.” 

Were you bonding? Bonding with Seokjin? Ludicrous. However, what was even more unbelievable was how normal and comfortable it felt… 

“How are you spending Christmas this year?” He asked, continuing to make conversation. 

“Well, I usually visit my parents too but they’re going to be abroad this year so I’ll just spend it with my friend Ana’s family.” It was all planned, they lived super close by so at least this year would be easy. 

He sniggered, eyes twinkling as opened his mouth to tease you. “Ditched by your own parents, embarrassing.” 

“Hey,” you exclaimed, whacking his arm just before you burst into laughter. 

He laughed along for a moment before growing semi-serious again. But just for a moment. “It’s actually going to be my first Christmas away from my family. It feels kind of weird but I can’t bring Yoongi along, he’ll bum out the atmosphere.”

You scoffed, voice filled with sarcasm. “You’re such a great friend, Seokjin.” 

He chuckled, opening his mouth to reply, but just as he did you both heard the door in the entry way opening, footsteps sounding. You guessed Yoongi was back home. Not long after, a black haired man came into view and Seokjin moved, cool air filling the gap. You realised just how close you’d been sat together. When had that happened? 

“Hey Yoongi,” Seokjin smiled. Yoongi raised a hand. “This is Y/N, my co-worker. You’ve heard me talk about her before, right?” 

Huh? Whining about you, no doubt… 

“Oh... yeah.” Yoongi’s eyes travelled to yours, a small smile upturning one corner of his mouth. “Hey, how’s it going?” 

“Hey,” you returned his smile. “Nice to meet you.” 

“How was work?” Seokjin asked. He sounded… concerned? That was sweet. 

Yoongi shrugged. “Fine. Had an appointment with a client.” Silence. He was a man of very few words. You liked it. “I’m going to my room, have fun planning that Christmas party.” 

Of course. That’s why Yoongi knew about you, Seokjin had told him about the party planning… 

You waved him bye, and then, once you’d heard him make his way upstairs, Seokjin turned to you. “See? Bums out the atmosphere.” 

“What atmosphere?” You joked. “No, but he seemed okay, considering…” Yes, his shoulders were a little slumped, as if he was carrying the whole world on them, but who knows, that could’ve been a thing before the breakup… He had sort of smiled at you… 

“Yeah…” Seokjin agreed, before pausing and raising an eyebrow. “Maybe he liked what he saw. You could always do me a solid and try to cheer him up for me.” 

You puzzled, unsure what he was getting at. 

“You know, like Namjoon did for you…” 

“SEOKJIN,” you yelled, jaw dropping in shock. “What the hell is wrong with you?” It wasn’t funny. 

He squeaked a laugh. “I’m just messing around, don’t worry. I don’t want you to sleep with Yoongi. That would just be weird. Besides,” he added as an afterthought, smirking mischievously. “You’re too boring.” 

He was trying to tease you again, wanting you to bite. Well, it wasn’t going to happen. 

“I wouldn’t touch any of your friends,” you shot instead. “They’re tainted by default.” 

Seokjin chuckled softly, shaking his head from side to side as he began to study the menu again. 

“You ladies have a couple of admirers,” the waiter grinned as he placed two white wine spritzers on your table. 

Ana squealed, taking one of the glasses immediately. “Where?” 

You’d only been out barely an hour, already in your second bar, but even you had to admit the thought of someone buying you a drink was a little exciting. You followed the waiter’s hand to a booth across the floor, anticipation pumping through your veins only to be thoroughly disappointed when you recognised one of the faces – well, both faces actually, but you’d only been acquainted with the second yesterday…

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” you groaned. 

“What?” Ana asked mildly confused, waving off the waiter with a thanks. “What’s wrong? They are so hot!”

“That’s dick cheese and his friend!”

“Wha–The guy you work with?” Your best friend sounded flabbergasted. “Which one is dick cheese? Although I wouldn’t kick either out of bed…” 

“Ana!” You hissed, taking another glance at the booth. Seokjin waved at you wildly, an obnoxious grin on his face. You grumbled. “He’s the one on the left.” 

“Oh, fuck.” She waved back, much to your annoyance. “No wonder he gets you so angry.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You were confused. Enough to not realise when she stood up, making a beeline for their booth. “Wait–Ana! Where are you going?!”

She didn’t bother to look back as she replied. “I’m going to say thanks, duh.” 

.

.

And that’s how you found yourself well on the way to Drunksville. You were only supposed to get tipsy tonight, knowing you’d pay for anything more in the morning, but well, you’d moved onto a club down the road and the drinks kept coming, and as much as you hated to admit it, hanging out with Seokjin and Yoongi was actually pretty enjoyable. Although, no matter how much fun you were having, it wasn’t enough to stay on the dancefloor for too long. 

“Hey,” you greeted Yoongi, slipping inside and around the booth to slump down next to him. Dancing couldn’t have been his cup of tea either because he’d given up way before you had. Seokjin and Ana were still going strong out there. 

You downed what was left of your drink, willing yourself to cool down as you huffed and puffed. God, you were drunk. 

“Are you okay?” He chuckled. 

You smiled. You liked Yoongi. He was nice, quiet – you liked quiet. “So, tell me,” you wondered, eager to understand something.  “How’s a guy like you friends with Seokjin?”

Yoongi’s forehead creased. “What do you mean?” 

Shrugging, you bit back a hiccup. “You seem normal, he’s…” What was Seokjin again? You could usually come up with a million and one (not so nice) words to describe him but the room was slightly spinning and your brain came up blank. 

Yoongi understood you anyway, laughing as he replied.   “He can just seem that way at first, it’s the nerves. They make him act up.” 

You narrowed your eyes. “Nerves?” What did that mean? You could never imagine a nervous Seokjin. He was always so sure of himself. 

Yoongi didn’t clarify. “Me and him are actually very similar. Annoying little shits when we want to be,” he laughed, before hesitating, “I’m…I’m a little injured right now, that’s why I seem a lot more subdued.”

“Oh,” you murmured, hoping you didn’t come off as condescending. “Yeah, Seokjin told me about your breakup. I’m sorry.” 

“It’s fine.”

“You seem a lot happier tonight though,” you offered. Happier than yesterday evening.  

“It’s called alcohol,” he grinned, bringing his glass up to his lips. He paused. “Y’know, he’s pretty cool once you get to know him.” It took you a second to realise he was talking about Seokjin. “He’s a great person.”

You shrugged slightly. “He’s okay.” What did it matter what you thought anyway? Seokjin definitely didn’t care. 

“He likes to joke around, I admit, but it seems to make you laugh, so.” Yoongi smirked slightly and tilted his head, taking a took a sip of his beer. 

Taken aback, you tried to think. Had you been laughing with Seokjin all night? Maybe laughing at him was a better way to describe it… 

“What are you guys talking about?”

You jumped when you heard a familiar loud voice and looked up to see Seokjin leaning over the table, four shots balanced between the fingers of both hands – two in each. His face was flushed, redder than you’d ever seen it – he’d obviously had enough of dancing too.  

“Nothing,” Yoongi replied smoothly. He stood up, finishing his drink. “I’m uh, I’m going outside for some fresh air.” 

“But I got us shots,” Seokjin complained. 

Yoongi looked over at you and smiled before tapping Seokjin on the shoulder. “I’m sure you and Y/N will make good use of them.” 

Hm… Everyone was drunk and acting weird. Not that you had time to contemplate it because immediately Yoongi had gone and Seokjin was taking his seat next to you. His cologne hit you. It was different to usual, you’d realised instantly earlier in the night. 

“Where’s Ana?” You asked. They’d both been dancing together when you’d left them. 

He shrugged as he handed you a shot. “I don’t know, lost her on the dancefloor.”

You hesitated. Should you have more to drink? The shots might push you over the edge. But… you were having fun. It was one night out, you might as well do it properly. So quickly you downed the shot, smirking Seokjin’s way as you picked up another. “I’ll have hers then.” 

He grinned slowly before scoffing as you choked. That shit burned, and you might have been able to handle the first shot no problem but this time your eyes watered and your throat screamed. 

“Seems like you’re trying to prove a point,” he laughed.

“What do you mean?” You demanded, already feeling more lightheaded. 

He didn’t care to explain, instead doing his two shots straight after the other, able to handle them with just a wince. “What do you think of Yoongi?” He asked, barely giving the liquid time to slip down his throat. 

“Huh?”

“Do you like him?”

You shrugged, confused as to why he was asking you. “He seems nice, yeah.”

“So, you like him?”

You froze. “Are you still trying to hook us up? I don’t like him like that.” You didn’t even know him. 

“No, no,” Seokjin rushed. “I wasn’t trying to… never mind.” He shook his head, changing the subject. “So who did you get for Secret Santa?”

“I’m not telling you,” you huffed, pushing his shoulder. 

“That means it’s me.” 

“Seokjiiin,” you whined, leaning into him as you nudged him once more. 

He laughed, looking a little surprised by your sudden affection – however unintentional. “I think you’re drunk.” 

…Maybe those shots were a bad idea, you’d only get worse… 

.

.

“Should we go and look for Yoongi and Ana?” Seokjin asked, checking his watch. 

You’d been sat together for a while now, conversation coming surprisingly easy. It was nonsense mostly – you might or might not have helped Seokjin with some festive ideas to prank Jungkook with – but Ana hadn’t come back from the dancing yet, and Yoongi was still outside – unless he’d done a runner, which was highly probable according to Seokjin. So it was probably best you both went to look for your friends. 

You followed closely behind Seokjin as you searched through the club and at one point he reached for your hand, helping you through a large group of people. His grip was warm and oddly gentle, but you didn’t have time to think about it too much as he’d already let go. He waited for you as you checked the restroom, but your best friend was nowhere to be found. It was probably the alcohol in your system but you started to get a little worried, especially when your text went ignored. Seokjin seemed to notice. 

“Stay here, okay? I’m going to check outside. I don’t want you to freeze to death.” He told you, having to practically shout in your ear the music was so loud in this area. 

You found yourself a little touched by his concern, no matter how small it was and listened, clutching your purse to your middle. You were in a black mini dress after all, your arms barely covered. You still had the perfect view of him though, able to watch him step out the building and look down the road. You noticed the concern on his features slowly turn into shock, his mouth dropping open, and you frowned. What the hell had he seen?

“Seokjin!” You called, which was pretty useless. He couldn’t hear a damn thing. You could barely hear yourself. You rushed forward. “Seokjin?” You pushed your way past some people who had clogged up the entry way and dashed down the stone steps. “What is it?”

The winter air hit you instantly. It was fucking freezing. Seokjin still looked in shock, glued to the spot and you grew frustrated, stopping right beside him. “What?” You demanded. “What’s going on?!” 

You followed his line of vision, and immediately you were positive your expression matched his. A little down the road, up against the wall, Yoongi and Ana were wrapped around one another, attached at the mouth. You were speechless, the cold no longer a problem. 

“Let’s not interrupt them,” Seokjin said suddenly, taking you by the hand once again to drag you back inside. (Your feet honestly wouldn’t work.) 

The instant heat got your blood pumping again, although the music did nothing for your whirring head. “What did we just witness?” You turned to him and asked (shouted). 

Seokjin still looked just as shocked, but he managed a joke, wrinkling his nose up. “Ew, what if our friends start dating? I’ll be stuck with you forever.” 

“Grow up,” you rolled your eyes, before randomly taking in the sight of him. How wasn’t he melting to death? The guy was in a fuzzy Christmas sweater. Actually, an even more important question; how hadn’t he electrocuted himself? The reindeer on his chest lit up. If one drop of sweat got into that hidden battery pack he was done for, surely?

“I thought you’d be saving that jumper for Friday,” you commented (yelled), quite honestly in a daze. You were drunk, in absolute shock, toes frozen, and somehow you were stood with Seokjin making conversation about Christmas jumpers. 

“Who says I don’t have a whole drawer full of the festive fuckers. I did say I loved Christmas, no?” He laughed.

You joined in. “I thought you were bullshitting.” 

“Of course you did.” He said with a small smile, shaking his head a little. 

“I can’t believe we caught them kissing.” You couldn’t stop thinking about it. 

Seokjin wiggled his eyebrows playfully. “They’re probably doing more than that by now.”

“Shut up.” You whined. “Wait. Do you think he told her about the breakup?”

“What?” Seokjin asked you to repeat, leaning in slightly, unable to hear you properly above the music. 

“Do you think she knows he’s on the rebound?”

Seokjin shrugged. “Maybe. Who cares.” 

“I care!” You exclaimed causing him to wince because you’d accidentally shouted in his ear. “Ana’s my best friend!”

Seokjin rolled his eyes slightly. “I thought you of all people would know people can just fuck with no strings attached.” 

“Will you ever drop that,” you deadpanned. Your hook up with Namjoon happened so long ago now, you barely even thought about it unless you saw him at work, which was pretty rare anyway. 

“Nope.” The way the sound of the p popped off his lips annoyed you. 

“What about you?” You asked, changing the subject from you. “No getting lucky tonight? Is Christmas sex not on par with birthday sex?” 

He burst out laughing. “I’d say it is, yeah, but I still have a couple of weeks to make it happen, so ask me then.” 

His answer almost annoyed you more and you couldn’t place why. He was just being stupid, classic old Seokjin. You should be used to it by now. 

“Come on,” he winked, stepping forward, towards the middle of the club and his hand cupped your elbow. “Let’s dance!” 

“No, no, no,” you immediately refused, grabbing his hand to stop him. 

“Pleaseee,” he pleaded, eyes wide. “I want to dance with you. You’ve hardly been on the floor all night.” 

Oh. Your heart did a little flip inside your chest. Maybe it was the tequila making its way back up your body… 

“Come on,” he chuckled, not giving up. “It’ll warm you up.” On cue both of his hands lifted and he started rubbing your shoulders. “I told you not to come outside. Now we both have the mental image of Yoongi sucking face stuck behind our eyelids and you’ve got frost bite.” 

You giggled, but still wouldn’t relent. He could stay here warming you up for the rest of the night if he wanted… Dancing made you sweaty. 

He tilted his head, giving you a look. “Y/N, do you want me to call you boring again?”

And just like that you wanted to prove him wrong… You were a sucker. He knew what he was doing. 

Only, the second round of shots for some Dutch courage were probably a bad idea. Your idea, but a very bad one, nevertheless. The dancefloor seemed to be stickier than it was an hour ago – and busier. It was packed and loud, which worked to distract you from how drunk you were. 

Seokjin could move. You hadn’t realised earlier, not really paying attention as you’d danced with Ana instead, but with just the two of you left you let him embarrass the hell out of you on the floor. At first it was definitely on purpose; he pulled the largest, wackiest moves that you begged him to stop, but soon enough he had you dying of laughter, so he continued, your amusement spurring him on. And then drunk you had to join in… 

“You know what? You’re actually pretty fun once you loosen up,” Seokjin yelled above the music, his hands somehow having found their way to your hips as you both snaked them to the beat. 

“I’m always fun,” you informed him, your breath fanning across his face as you lifted your arms in the air. “You just only know work me.” 

He smiled. “Well, I don’t know, I think I’m getting to know normal you lately…” 

You snorted some type of noise. “That’s what you think!” 

He went to open his mouth to argue but you spun around, your back pressed to him as you continued to sway. Your skin was hot to the touch, too many bodies cramped in this small space, but you loved the feeling of Seokjin’s hands on your hips, even more so when they slowly inched up your waist. You flung your arms back, looping them around his neck to pull him closer. It had been a long time since you’d danced with a guy like this. Not even Namjoon. Not even your ex. 

You could feel how boiling he was too, a thin layer of sweat coating the back of his neck, and as you ran your fingers through his slightly wavy hair he let out a little groan. It was extremely quiet, would’ve gone unnoticed if his mouth wasn’t hovering by your ear, but now you’d heard it and it changed everything. Something exploded inside your chest, fresh heat prickling your skin and you found yourself pushing into him further, grinding in a small circle. 

The dancefloor was full of couples like this so no one took any notice. But Seokjin did. He froze, as if he was sure he’d imagined it, so ever so carefully you did it again. This time he knew his drunk mind wasn’t playing tricks on him and after a slight hesitation his hands slid to your hips again, gripping them tighter. He let you grind against him, but didn’t reciprocate, he just kept dancing to the music, which seemed to turn you even braver. 

With the bass of the music pumping through your body you moved back and forth against his crotch, hearing his breath get shallower and shallower. It was addictive and you were chasing the feeling before you knew it, bold and finding yourself getting more turned on by the second. It wasn’t long before you began to feel him grow hard against your ass, and even though surprised, you still carried on, loving it. 

“Y/N,” he murmured against your ear, sounding out of breath. You circled your hips again. This time he couldn’t help but push back. “It’s getting late.” His voice faltered. “You’re drunk. I’m drunk.” 

You frowned to yourself. What was he trying to say? You felt his hands leave your hips, reaching for your arms around his neck to slide them away. He was trying to get you to face him. He was still half hard in his pants but he ignored it. 

“You’re drunk,” he repeated, as if it was some sort of answer, some sort of reason. He started to twist you his way but you tripped, falling into him. “Definitely drunk,” he chuckled, tugging his hands off your waist from where he’d caught you. “It’s time to go home.” 

“I don’t want to go home,” you pouted, wrapping your arms around his neck. You went to push your body into him but he angled away from you, creating distance. 

“You need to go home,” he laughed. It sounded awkward. “Think of that hangover tomorrow.” 

“I will,” you shrugged, “tomorrow.” 

Seokjin stared at you, his brown eyes wavering slightly. They were darker than usual, swimming with something that made your belly flip, but he steeled himself, holding strong. “Come on,” he pressed. “We can share an Uber.” 

“It’s fine.” You muttered, disappointed for some reason. You were unsure how he could hear you above the music, but he did. “I’ll find Ana.” 

He chuckled. “Ana’s definitely gone by now. Don’t you remember what we caught her doing?”

Oh. 

He was right. 

Damn your best friend. 

.

.

You didn’t remember much of the Uber ride home, the sudden departure from the club had brought deafening silence and you were now very aware of how much your head was spinning. Your bed was calling you – your warm, cosy, king sized bed… However, you took one look at Seokjin as he helped you out of the car and all that became forgotten. 

You clung to his jumper, voice still loud despite there being no music now. “Do you want to come in?” 

“Uh, I don’t think that’s a good idea,” He replied carefully, chuckling. “Sober you definitely doesn’t want me in your apartment.”  

You reached forward, brushing a strand of hair out of his eyes and giving him what you hoped was your best smile. “Drunk me does.” 

He held your stare for a moment, searching long enough to see something that made him make up his mind. “Fine,” he sighed lightly, bending down into the car to talk to the driver. You were barely listening, looking up at the stars, but Seokjin held your hand tightly, keeping your heels rooted to the ground. 

“Keep this thing running, I’ll be back in five.”

“That’s gonna cost you, my friend.” 

“It’s fine.” Another sigh. “Just– stay? I won’t be long.” 

It took you a couple of minutes to get through your door, Seokjin had to open it in the end, and he followed you in, a respectable distance behind you. He closed the door quietly, smiling when you turned back to look at him as you kicked off your shoes. 

“Okay, you’re home safe now. I’m just going to go, see you Monday, okay?” 

“No, don’t go,” you bemoaned, closing the distance to cling to him once again. In your drunken state you couldn’t place why you wanted him to stay so bad. All you knew was that you did. 

He sighed again, lifting his hands to clasp over your wrists in an attempt to move you away. He looked and sounded torn. “Y/N, the Uber’s running. I’m going to end up paying double to get home.” 

You shrugged. “Tell him to leave then.” 

He closed his eyes and exhaled, it sounded like a whimper. “What are you doing to me?” He murmured, but you were barely paying attention, swaying where you stood. He noticed and groaned. “You’re so drunk!” 

“Am not.” 

He laughed, genuinely amused, and if your drunk mind didn’t know any better it sounded as if he was endeared by you. He shook your shoulders lightly. “Look at me.” You couldn’t quite focus. He cupped your face instead, laughing louder as he angled you to stare straight into his eyes. “Look at me. You are so out of it.”

You just grumbled, but warmth fluttered through your body. It felt good to be touched by him. You thought back to the dancefloor, the way you’d been pressed up against his body. Your mouth parted, suddenly thirsty. Really thirsty. But for what? 

“Can you even make out my face?” Seokjin asked, continuing to be amused. 

“Of course,” you snapped, fingers reaching for him. “There’s your hair,” – You ran your fingers through the dark brown locks – “your eyes... nose…” He let you poke his eyelids gently and then you bopped his nose.

“Get offf.” He snorted softly. 

And then your attention fell to his mouth. Those plump, deep pink lips that were opened and slightly wet from where he’d been swiping his tongue across them. You swallowed, hands cupping his jaw. “Your lips –” 

You dove before you knew what you were really doing, pressing your mouth to his, taking him by surprise. Not a second later he was pulling back, holding you at arm’s length. “Woah, woah.” He chuckled in surprise, but his voice wavered. “Not the time, Y/N. Trust me.” 

You frowned, annoyance spiking and you shook him off. “What? So you’ve suddenly turned chivalrous now?” Scoffing, you felt like an idiot – upset and embarrassed, you spoke without thinking. “Or do you just not want me?”

Something flashed across Seokjin’s face. He looked irritated. Sounded it too when he replied. “Of course I fucking want you.” You froze. Huh? However, you didn’t have time to think about what he’d said before he was striding towards you, backing you up against the wall.  You gripped the tops of his arms on instinct, looking up at him as he loomed over you, hair falling into his dark eyes. They were the same colour as they had been back at the club – when you’d been grinding all over him. Your breath caught. 

“Ever wondered why you frustrate me so much?” He rasped. 

Something inside you screamed. Not that you had time to realise because immediately his mouth was on yours. Each press of his lips was rushed, as if he was acting on instinct and all you could do was cling to him and try to keep up. You let out a moan when you felt his tongue attempt to push past the seam of your lips and you let him in, moaning louder when the wet muscles clashed together, the dam now broken. 

It was contagious. Seokjin grunted against you, throatier than you were expecting, noises so unlike him your whole body burned in desire. Actually, it was on fire. It started to crave him, the feeling so strong all you could do was let it take you. You yelped when his hands curled around your ass, giving you one strong push and you promptly jumped into his arms. He caught you effortlessly and you wrapped your legs around him. 

By God, he was strong. He crashed you into the wall, mouth still hungry as he ground his crotch into yours. The skirt of your dress had ridden up to your waist, your underwear the only thing protecting you as he rubbed you against his dick. Which was hard again – very hard. Maybe he’d had a semi the whole car ride home, which was a thought that got you moaning louder inside his mouth, your tongues getting messy, your teeth clashing. 

“Seok-jin,” you whimpered. Your core tingled, hot to the touch and you could feel your arousal beginning to pool against the lace of your thong. You wanted him – no, you needed him. “Pleaseee. Please.”

He grunted, your begging fucking with his head and you felt his arms give way. He stumbled forward, no other option but to ease you down to the floor, but his mouth didn’t relent; he kissed you just as needy as before, sliding down your chin to make his way to your throat. 

You gasped at the new sensation, his tongue licking strips up your skin, his teeth nipping. Your legs shook under you, nothing to do with the alcohol you’d consumed, it was all him. He was driving you wild, and you needed him to fuck you. You knew that much. 

Your hand reached between your bodies, loving the sound of Seokjin heavy breathing against your ear as he now sucked on your lobe, and you wrapped your palm around his clothed cock. He was solid. Rock hard.. It had to be painful, surely? You got to work, rubbing him back and forth in an attempt to relieve some of his discomfort. 

“Fuck,” he muttered, and you jutted your hips into him too, mistaking the cursing for his enjoyment. “Y/N, wait,” he said, pulling back and stopping the movements of your hand, his long fingers circling your wrist. You tried reaching for his mouth again, still oblivious to his sudden change in demeaner.  

“Not like this,” he murmured, trying his best not to kiss you back, no matter how hard you pecked his mouth. 

“Why?” You asked, giving up. Your lips were wet and swollen. They prickled. God, you were so turned on your voice shook. His too. 

“Do you even know what you’re doing right now?” He sounded uncertain, looking you in the eyes as he chuckled bitterly. “You hate my guts. You don’t want my dick.” 

You frowned. What was he talking about? You’d been practically dry humping him. Of course you wanted his dick. “I do,” you insisted, leaning into him to tug at his belt. He didn’t give in. “Seokjin, just give me your dick.” 

He stared down at you, his hand still clutching your wrist, breathing still ragged, his eyes still black… but despite how much he obviously wanted this, he composed himself, his expression softening. You felt him reach behind you and gently pull your dress down over your ass. 

“We’ll talk about it tomorrow, okay?” He hummed softly, voice still visibly affected by you. “When you’re sober. When we’re both sober…”

.

.

You awoke suddenly, peaceful and serene for all of two seconds before you groaned, burrowing your face into your pillow. It felt as if someone was stomping on top of your head. What the hell happened last night? Wait… How had you even gotten home? Why couldn’t you remember anything?!

You blindly reached for your nightstand, praying your cell phone was there, fingers stretched as far as they would allow until you felt the familiar belonging. You grabbed it and burrowed further under the covers. You needed to call Ana. She’d fill you in – make you remember. 

Wait –

At the thought of your best friend you suddenly remembered a few things. Seokjin and Yoongi had been at the club too. They’d bought you drinks, you’d sat at their table, drunk more. Tequila must have been involved for you to be this clueless. Enough of it and you could forget your own name come morning. You’d always been the same since college. Squinting at the brightness of the screen, your head throbbing even harder if that was possible, you started to call Ana. It rang and rang… Frustrated you gave up. She could sleep through the end of the world so why were you surprised. You hoped she woke up with the world’s largest and longest hangover, serves her right for not – Oh. OH. 

You shot up, in immediate regret when the entirety of your head spasmed. Groaning you tried to fight through the pain, wishing you had some calm so you could actually piece together your memories. Ana and Yoongi. Outside. All over one another. Making out against the wall. 

What. The. Fuck. 

No wonder why she wasn’t picking up. 

The memories were hazy, but it was something. You continued to wrack your brain… You and Seokjin had found them, but they hadn’t been aware and then you’d gone back inside. He asked you to dance and that’s when you’d suggested more shot… Shots. Tequila shots. You were an idiot. Try as you might you couldn’t remember anything after that. It was all one big blur. How had you gotten from the club to your apartment? 

You moved to sit on the side of your bed, soles of your feet pressing into the carpet. Your stomach churned a little. No, you couldn’t be sick. You hated being sick. Rubbing your stomach in an attempt to soothe it you looked down and realised you were still wearing your dress. Gross. You’d gotten into bed with your clothes on? You groaned weakly. You better have washed your hands before knocking out… although, you highly doubted it. 

Looking at your phone again, you knew there was only one thing you could do. If you wanted answers you needed to ask the right person… 

(10:34am) You: How the hell did I get home last night?

No more than a minute later three dots appeared on the screen, signalling Seokjin’s reply. But he was taking his time with it. Jesus. They kept disappearing for a few moments just to pop up again. Why was it such a hard question?! 

(10:37am) Seokjin: You can’t remember? 

Really? Three minutes to type three words? 

(10:37am) You: Obviously not I wouldn’t be asking you otherwise  (10:38am) You: We saw Ana and Yoongi kissing... We had shots... We danced

You talked him through what you did recall, and once again, he played that irritating game with those three dots. You knew he wasn’t typing up an essay. 

(10:41am) Seokjin: And then I took you home

You raised both your eyebrows. He took you home? Why did that surprise you so much? 

(10:41am) You: Thanks (10:42am) Seokjin: How’s your head?  (10:43am) You: Hurts  (10:43am) You: Everything hurts  (10:43am) Seokjin: 🤣 

Rolling your eyes, you threw your phone on the bed and managed to stand up. You were done talking to him of he was just going to laugh at your misery. Besides, he’d told you all you needed to know. The mystery was solved. Next, you needed to shower. 

Immediately. 

You were still feeling extremely fragile the next morning but managed to get into the office at 9am sharp with the help of coffee. You’d spent the night on the phone to Ana, getting all the nitty gritty details about her hook up with Yoongi. Apparently, they’d bumped into each other outside after she’d slipped out for some fresh air and had gotten talking. He’d told her about his recent breakup, and having been cheated on before, naturally Ana and he had bonded, and said bonding had led to kissing. Lots of it. Which had then led to lots of sex back at her apartment. (Yes, he did know how to use his dick if anyone was curious, and yes, it was very pretty.)

You’d expected to hear about it from Seokjin this morning but he was actually uncharacteristically quiet. Although, it might have been because he was partially blindsided when he got into the office. First, he was late, which had never happened before. No matter what you thought of Seokjin, he was always punctual and professional (when it was called for). And second, there was a surprise waiting for him. 

Jungkook had draped his entire desk and chair in strings of fairy lights. Everything was lit up. It was a lot, but even you had to admit it was funny, and you hated their pranking war with a burning passion. Mainly because you were always caught in the middle. Seokjin however, seemed a little out of it. You mean, he still laughed, tried to wrestle Jungkook in the middle of Hoseok’s good morning greeting, but something about him seemed off. You couldn’t put a finger on it, it was almost like he was forcing it. 

He hardly looked at you when you asked him what he had planned for payback. Shrugging his shoulders as he rolled his chair out and slumped in it – lights still twinkling. “Who knows.” 

“I thought you had a bunch of ideas up your sleeve?” You’d spent a good half an hour discussing them Saturday night. 

That got his attention. He raised an eyebrow as he stared at you. “You remember that? I thought everything was a blur?” 

“Yeah, anything after we caught our best friends getting freaky on the streets.” You chuckled, feeling a little uneasy by the way he was still looking at you, as if he was suspicious of something. 

After a moment he gave up…Possibly? Upturning his shoulder he gave you a small smile. “Lightweight.” He didn’t meet your eyes though and leaned over to start pulling at a string of lights that laid between your desks. 

You reached over on instinct, placing your hand over his to stop him. He recoiled a little and you pulled back. What was that reaction for? “Keep them up,” you told him, choosing to ignore whatever had just happened. “It’s Christmas after all.” 

You dropped your hand under the desk, it tingled a little. Seokjin’s hand had felt warm, familiar? The inklings of something floated around the sides of your brain but you couldn’t place your finger on it. 

“Just don’t blow us up,” you joked. 

Wait. Seokjin’s stupid Christmas jumper from Saturday night. You remembered now. It had lit up and you’d wondered how he hadn’t set himself on fire yet. That was it. What was trying to seep into your brain just now. Hopefully things were coming back to you slowly… You’d remember everything in no time, you were sure of it. 

Meanwhile Seokjin nodded slowly, retreating his hand as he smiled at you slightly. 

Was he feeling okay? You thought about asking him. Maybe his mom was still taking it bad that he wouldn’t make Christmas this year? You opened your mouth, full intentions to check in on him, but stopped yourself. It wasn’t really your place. You didn’t know his personal life all too well. You mean, yeah, he’d told you some things lately, but you didn’t want to overstep the mark. He was probably just having a bad day. Everyone had them. 

However, you had to admit there was something quite unnerving about seeing him so downcast. It didn’t suit him. 

What on earth could have happened? 

.

.

The last week of work flew by. It was always the same, the office in a rush to finish up all loose ends before the two week holiday. You and Seokjin had one last meeting on Wednesday morning, just to check in and make sure everything was ready for Friday. The buffet was getting delivered the morning of and that’s when Seokjin was going to decorate the conference room. You’d been in charge of the Christmas playlist but he didn’t seem to have much interest when you’d shown him your choices. In fact, he was still acting a little strange. 

He was quiet, not his usual self, as in, he wasn’t constantly finding ways to annoy you. In fact, you barely spoke unless you had to, which before this Christmas party would’ve been great – the norm actually. However now, things were different. Had you done something to upset him? You couldn’t think what. Maybe you’d offended him when you were drunk and couldn’t remember? You thought about asking him but couldn’t find the nerve. Besides, Seokjin didn’t seem the type to get offended by trivial things. You and he tended to be at one another’s throats most (all) of the time, but it was all done in jest. You didn’t despise him, he just got on your nerves – like you got on his. You couldn’t imagine yourself saying anything terrible to him, especially because from what you could remember of that night, you’d both had fun… Hanging out with Seokjin wasn’t too bad, drunk or sober. 

So, things continued to remain a mystery, until that was, the next day… 

.

.

“Here, I got you something.”

You looked away from your computer at the sound of Seokjin’s voice, finding him stood above you, his winter coat nearly buttoned all the way up. It was just after lunch on Thursday but Seokjin and Hoseok had to head off for an emergency meeting with a client who wanted to discuss something before Christmas. 

Your forehead furrowed when you saw he was holding out a small glittery gift bag and when you took too long to take it he shook it. You reacted, taking it from him but still questioning him with your eyes. “Seokjin, Secret Santa is tomorrow.” 

“No, it’s not for that,” he informed you, his voice oddly quiet. Now you were even more confused. Why had he gotten you a gift? You felt oddly embarrassed as you played with the ribbon handles nervously. 

“I got Beryl,” he grumbled, easily making you ease up and chuckle. You couldn’t even begin to imagine what he’d purchased a sixty year old grandma… A bar of soap probably. 

As if you couldn’t stop it, your fingers were opening up the gift. Seokjin noticed and started babbling immediately. “I saw it when I was out shopping for decorations and it made me think of you… I hope you like it. Sorry if you don’t.” 

You awed as you pulled out a small Christmas bauble, green and gold in colour with the painting of a black cat in the centre, complete with a Christmas hat between its ears. It was beautiful and quirky – and totally unexpected. You’d gotten him a damn pair of lame ass cufflinks. 

“You can hang it on your tree at home or something,” you heard him suggest. 

You looked up at him, still a little speechless but you managed to get something out. “Thank you, Seokjin. I love it.” 

His face lit up at that. The first time you’d seen him genuinely smile all week. “You do?” 

You nodded, finding yourself unable to otherwise reply. Your heart felt a little funny. It was good to see him a cheerful, you’d missed it. He always looked good when he smiled… 

He was looking at you, and you didn’t know whether you’d been staring first, but he was watching you carefully now, gaze slightly intense, as if he was trying to work something out, to find something. You dropped your chin, feeling embarrassed, cheeks hot. Why did you feel so strange? You were making it obvious. 

“You really don’t remember Saturday night?” He spoke suddenly, tone soft, careful. 

You froze. Straitening to look at him again you shook your head. “Nope.” You forced out a laugh. “It’s still a total blank. Can you believe it? Tequila is my mortal enemy.” 

One side of Seokjin’s mouth raised into a half smile, but he didn’t look too amused. You felt something trickle down your spine – a bad feeling. “Seokjin?” You questioned, finding courage. “Why? What happened?” You needed to know. 

“Hm?” He hummed, lost in thought. His face was serious once again. 

“What happened Saturday night?” 

He shook his head, squeezing out a small chuckle. It had fake written all over it. “Nothing.” 

“Something must’ve happened,” you insisted, growing a little frustrated. Whatever it was  had something to do with his odd behaviour. 

He shrugged, hands in his pockets. His cheeks were growing flushed but that just annoyed you. “It’s nothing. You were just wasted.” 

“Tell me now!” You hissed, careful to keep your voice down. The office was pretty empty at the moment, some still in the staffroom, others busy around the building, but you still didn’t want anyone overhearing something personal. 

“No.” He refused. He looked stressed out. 

“Seokjin!” He was stressing you out now. What the hell had you done that night?! 

“I don’t want to.” 

“Why?” You practically wailed. 

“It’s embarrassing.” 

“What happened?” You were losing it now, thinking the worst. “What did I do?” 

He sighed loudly, finally giving in. “You kissed me.”

Silence. 

The colour drained from your face at his revelation, dread instantly filling you. What? You hadn’t been expecting that. Whatever your mind had thought up, it definitely wasn’t that.

“We kissed, okay?” He continued. “I took you home, you practically begged me to come inside and we kissed.” 

“Oh, my god,” you replied weakly, head now in your hands. You took a deep breath, trying to wrack your brains for any memories. How could you have forgotten such a major thing?! You invited Seokjin into your apartment? You kissed him? No wonder he’d been acting so strange this past week. You’d put him in such an awkward position. He was embarrassed and now so were you… 

“I’m sorry,” Seokjin apologised, down to a whisper. “I should’ve told you but I just didn’t know how. I wasn’t expecting you to forget everything and I didn’t know how to –” He stopped himself with a groan, going around in circles. 

Meanwhile, things were coming back to you. Not memories as such, more like hazy images and the faintest of sensations. His words had dislodged something. Dancing together, his hands on your body, his breath on your neck. The uber ride home. Stood in your entry way. Your hands on his arms. The feeling of his body pressed into yours. Your mouths attached and hungry. You felt yourself burn, unclear recollections stirring something hidden inside of you. 

“…Y/N?” Seokjin prompted. You managed to look at him but that was it. You mouth wouldn’t work, and what could you say anyway? How could you explain yourself when you couldn’t remember all the details? 

“It’s fine.” He told you suddenly, thinking he was reassuring you. “Don’t worry about it, okay?” 

“Seokjin, you ready?” 

You both startled at the sound of Hoseok’s voice and looked up to see him stood in his office doorway, buttoning up his coat. 

Seokjin nodded, a little dazed. “Uh, yeah, coming. Won’t be a minute.” 

“Last minute party planning, huh?” Hoseok grinned. “I’ll meet you in the car.” 

“Look, I gotta go,” Seokjin told you once Hoseok had strolled off. “You’ll probably be gone by the time I get back, so I’ll see you tomorrow.” He spoke in a rush, not giving you time to respond. Your mouth opened, but he cut in. “It’s fine, Y/N. Trust me.” 

And then he was gone. 

You looked down at the Christmas bauble on your desk, so mortified you felt like crying.  

Crying might have been a tad dramatic, you admit. So you didn’t. You were a mixture of embarrassed and confused, unable to concentrate properly the rest of the afternoon. How had you kissed Seokjin and just forgotten about it? It was scary to think something like that could happen, a blind spot in your memory. His revelation had helped you remember some bits but there was nothing concrete. You spent your evening forcing yourself to recall more details, talking things over with Ana on the phone. You couldn’t not tell her. Not when you were in the middle of having a mini breakdown. 

She was interested in a lot more than just remembering the kiss though… 

“So if you remember him kissing you back what does that mean?” She demanded. 

You groaned. “I don’t even know if I’m remembering it correctly.” But why would your mind play tricks on you? Although, false memories were a thing… 

“Of course you are! Dick cheese likes you. It’s obvious! Classic high school bullshit.” 

“Ana, please,” you sighed. Now wasn’t the time for her theories. “He was drunk too,” you reasoned. “Just because we kissed doesn’t mean he likes me. I don’t like him, do I?” Yet, you’d grinded all over him on the dancefloor. (The memories of that were now clearer, and they made your cheeks burn…)

“Hmm.” She didn’t sound too convinced. 

“Ana, come on!” You cried. “It was a stupid mistake, and now I’ve just made things super awkward between us.” 

No wonder Seokjin had been acting weird all week, and there you’d been completely oblivious! The thought was enough to make you groan out loud. How could you go to work tomorrow? Host a party with him when things were so awkward?!

“I mean… You two need to talk about it properly. Make sure there’s no crossed wires. If you’re both on the same page then there’s no need for things to be awkward between you.” 

You rolled your eyes. She made it seem so easy. She wasn’t the one who’d made out with her co-worker. She never had to see her hook up ever again. While you had to look yours in the eye five days a week for the rest of your life quite possibly.

“You guys didn’t even hook up,” Ana screeched when you told her just that. “A slight fumble in your hallway isn’t exactly something you need to relocate for. Just talk to him.” 

Simple, right?  

But nothing ever was... 

“Let’s just forget about it,” Seokjin smiled your way as you both helped carry in the buffet food the next morning. He was holding the building’s door open for you with his back, letting you slip in first as you cradled the cardboard box filled with things you couldn’t even remember ordering. Too preoccupied with trying to bring up yesterday. 

You paused, not expecting him to shrug it off like that. In fact, it got you pretty speechless. Were you hurt? As much as Ana’s idea had made you want the earth to open up and swallow you, it made sense to talk things out with him. 

This morning you’d remembered even more while you’d brushed your teeth… Seokjin helping you slip the skirt of your dress down, finding your kitchen to get you some water… You were slowly piecing things together and it was confusing the hell out of you… You wished more than anything you could remember the whole thing. To know what was going on inside your head at the time, because right now you were a mess. 

But hearing Seokjin sound so flippant, so unfazed made you a little deflated… What if you didn’t want to forget about it? 

“I mean, you did already, so,” he gave a shrug and you followed him into the elevator in a daze. 

“Oh, yeah, okay,” you forced yourself to say, hitting the third floor button. You turned to look at him and plastered a smile onto your face. It hurt. “Good idea.” 

.

.

“Where is he?” Jungkook whined like a big kid. (The Christmas jumper he was wearing with a giant teddy bear in the centre didn’t help things…) “He knows I’m starving. Been saving myself all day for this.”

You raised a judgemental eyebrow. “You didn’t even have breakfast?” 

He looked at you, shooting you a quick wink. “I’m treating this buffet like it deserves to be treated. Like it’s my one and only.” At his side, Mina giggled. 

“Let’s just open up,” Hoseok suggested, reaching for the handle of the conference door. 

“No!” You exclaimed, standing in front of it. 

You were all waiting around like a bunch of lemons, Seokjin having done a disappearing act just before the party was due to start. Jungkook had already tried to call him three times but his phone was engaged. Everyone was getting impatient, but he needed to be here to see everyone’s reactions to his decorating. He’d been in there all morning, blinds closed, not even you knew what it looked like in there. 

“Y/N, come on,” Jungkook cried dramatically. “He won’t mind, let’s just get in there!”

“Fine,” you gave in, turning around to open up. You didn’t really have a choice, everyone was gearing up to trample you… 

One look inside had you a little speechless. It was beautiful, the room decorated like Santa’s Grotto. Seokjin had done an amazing job, and you felt bad for ever doubting his skill. For ever doubting his sincerity when it came to planning this entire party… 

“Oh, whoa,” Jungkook gasped behind you, sounding wholly surprised. “Jin did so well on the decorations.” You turned back to agree but saw him smirking. “You must be pissed.” 

“Shut up,” you scoffed and immediately swatted his hand away from a tray of sandwiches. “No! You have to wait!” 

Jungkook made a noise of agony, practically flaking out in one of the chairs. “I’m this close to passing out!”

You sighed at his dramatics. “I’ll go and look for him.” He can’t have gone far, surely? You pointed at everyone as you stepped out, expression stern. “No starting this party until I find him – and no eating food.” 

Jungkook whimpered. 

As you walked out of the office and down one flight of stairs you started to grow worried. What if something was wrong? Maybe there’d been an emergency and he’d had to leave…? Only, those thoughts didn’t have a chance to go too far as you spotted him almost immediately a little down the hallway. The second floor was unoccupied, most of the rooms either used for storage or ominously locked. He was stood with a shoulder against the wall, his back to you. The Santa’s hat he’d been wearing earlier was shoved into his back pocket. You’d caught him just in time, he was finishing up a phone call before staring at the screen, deep in thought it seemed. 

You suddenly felt nervous… You hadn’t been alone together at all since this morning and you’d been slightly miserable ever since then. Ever since he’d shut down the conversation you so badly wanted. You caught him staring your way a few times, when he was coming in and out of the conference room mid decorating – or maybe he was catching you staring. Who knew anymore. Your head was a mess, confused and unexplainably disappointed. 

But you needed to suck it up. There was a Christmas party to pull off, and it needed both its hosts…

“Seokjin?” You called, walking closer. 

He turned around with a start, shoving his phone into his jeans pocket. “Oh, hey.”

You took a moment to admire his Christmas jumper – a dabbing Santa Claus, which was pretty 2016 now, but whatever. You were wearing one similar to the bauble he’d gifted you yesterday, a cat wearing a Christmas hat, but you’d paired it with a Mrs. Claus skirt you wore every year without fail. Oh. You suddenly remembered something. Seokjin telling you he had a whole drawer full of Christmas sweaters. The thought should’ve made you laugh but you were still so nervous. You heart felt a little funny as you stared up at him. 

One thing was for certain, you didn’t think you could forget about the kiss. 

Could you excuse yourself to run away and call Ana? But then there’d be zero hosts at the party and Jungkook would disintegrate from hunger… You needed to power on. 

“Everyone’s wondering where you went,” you said, voice sounding strange as you spoke into the unsettling silence. 

You really didn’t want things to be awkward. You would hate it so much. You understood you didn’t have the best of relationships, but it worked for you both. Now it could all be ruined, and you didn’t want that. You didn’t know what you wanted…

Seokjin hesitated before tapping his pocket. “Sorry, phone call. Some type of insurance sales shit.” 

You nodded, unsure why you didn’t quite believe him, but chose to ignore it, giving him a short smile. “We should hurry up. Jungkook is salivating in there. He’s two seconds away from devouring the whole buffet.” 

Seokjin chuckled lightly at that. “Expected. He’s been fasting since 7pm last night.” 

Why didn’t that surprise you? 

“He’s already forced his way inside. Sorry. I tried to hold them off for as long as possible.”

“That’s my own fault.” He shrugged, then gave you a gentle smile. “Thanks for trying.” 

Your heart did a little flip. You tried to ignore it. “You did a great job on decorating by the way.” 

“You sound surprised,” he teased. “How many times do I have to say I lo– 

“You love Christmas, yes, okay, I believe you now.” You interrupted with a laugh. You remembered that from Saturday night, but you wanted to remember all of it. 

You opened your mouth, you needed to tell him. You needed to tell him you didn’t want to forget. “Seokjin,” you began, unsure how to continue. You didn’t want to make a fool of yourself. However it seemed he had things to say himself…

“I lied.”

Huh? 

His admission caught you off guard. He could probably tell by your face. He lifted a hand and rubbed the back of his neck, looking awkward. “I lied about the phone call. It was Yoongi. He was giving me a pep talk.” 

“A pep talk?” You repeated, now aware you could hear your own heartbeat. 

He took a step forward and let out a deep breath, gearing himself up. “I can’t stop thinking about last weekend, Y/N.” Your heart was thudding now. “I know I said we should forget about it but I can’t. You don’t remember it and I know you regret it and I’m sorry for,” he stopped to sigh in frustration. “I don’t know, I just feel really guilty. Because I really enjoyed kissing you.” 

He was staring straight into your eyes, no more than a foot between you. He looked nervous and remorseful. You didn’t like it. 

Firm, you held his gaze. “I don’t regret it.” That thought had never crossed your mind. Even through all the shock and mortification. Yes, your memories were extremely vague, but you didn’t regret the kiss. If anything you were curious. Even more curious now. 

Seokjin paused, not expecting your reply, but he sounded hopeful. “You don’t?” 

You shook your head. “I was embarrassed when you told me, yes, but that was because I thought I’d made a fool of myself – I mean, I still did, but if you enjoyed kissing me I guess it was worth it.” 

Seokjin had enjoyed kissing you, and from your foggy memories, you’d enjoyed kissing him too. You smiled. It was contagious as he grinned your way too. 

“You didn’t make a fool of yourself. At all.” He stressed. “Do you remember anything now?” He sounded concerned, still unsure how to go about this. 

“Bits and pieces, yeah.” You admitted. “You got me a glass of water and then left…” 

He looked guilty. “I lost myself a little, I admit, but I couldn’t let it happen. I couldn’t go through with it because you were so drunk and I was pretty sure you hated me and I could never take advantage of you like that.” 

Your heart fluttered. Genuine Seokjin was dangerous for you. “I don’t hate you,” you told him pointedly, crossing your arms across your chest, the beginnings of a smirk itching to appear. “You annoy me to no end but that’s sort of your charm, I guess.” 

He cocked an eyebrow, sensing the change in atmosphere as he asked smugly, “My charm?”

“Don’t ruin it,” you snipped, feeling brave as you stepped closer to him to tilt your head and run a hand down his chest – down the dabbing Santa… “So, you liked kissing me?” 

He nodded enthusiastically, curiously watching your movements. “It felt good. And not just in my dick but like, everywhere.” 

“Seokjin!” You exclaimed, rendered speechless. 

“What?” He asked, eyes wide. He grabbed your hips pulling you closer and you couldn’t help but squeal, reaching for his shoulders. He felt good. Big and warm and familiar. “I’m trying to talk about my feelings here.” 

He was teasing you, sure, but he was also telling the truth. You knew that. Feelings was a scary word, an uncertain word, but you thought you liked the way it made you feel. Maybe Ana was correct… Maybe a part of you did like Seokjin. It sure felt like it right now…

“Kiss me,” you whispered, gaze on his mouth before it flickered to his eyes. “I’m sober now and I want to see if I like it too.” 

You already knew the answer. He did too by the smirk on his face, but he listened anyway, closing the distance between your mouths. His lips felt instantly familiar, making you feel at ease as they pressed into yours. Fluttering his eyes closed you followed suit and he moved gently, tentatively, as if he couldn’t believe it – as if he didn’t want to ruin anything. From the back of your mind vague memories started to wind their way forward, his kiss drawing them out. 

You wrapped your arms around his neck, pressing your body into his ever so slightly with a soft sigh. The tip of his tongue found yours, hints of it joining each drag of his mouth and something lit up inside of you. So you were inevitably disappointed when he pulled back, giving your hips a soft squeeze.

“So?” He grinned. 

You hummed out loud, running your fingers through the hair against the nape of his neck. He liked that. You remembered running them through his hair on the dancefloor, his hands on your body. Stomach doing somersaults, you wanted more – needed more. “Maybe a bit more tongue and I’ll give you an answer…” 

He breathed out a shaky laugh and you thought he might hit back with something but there was no time for talking, not when he couldn’t bear to be away from your lips. Listening, he licked into your mouth, moving with a lot more confidence now. He held you tight before one of his hands came up to softly cup your cheek, the quietest of noises escaping his throat – showing just how much he was enjoying himself. You joined him, moaning gently into the kiss, your tongues untiring as the air around you shifted. 

It was when your back hit the wall did you truly let yourself leave go, hands exploring the expanse of his back as he crowded you, humming greedily against your lips, his hands holding your face as if he couldn’t bear to leave you and come up for air. More memories fluttered their way past your eyelids, a lot more vivid now, Seokjin’s tongue beckoning them  to the forefront of your mind. 

You remembered your kiss was hot and heavy, up against your entry way wall. You had wanted him so bad in that moment and here wasn’t much different. It was like you had been thrown right back there – that eagerness, that want. The only reason you pulled away eventually was because you literally needed to breath. You didn’t fancy passing out, enjoying yourself way too much… 

“I can’t believe you said to forget about this,” you managed to speak, breathless, lips wet and flush as you ran your hands across the broadness of his shoulders. God. You couldn’t stop touching him. 

“I can’t believe you did forget about this,” he exclaimed. He was breathing heavy, just like at the club when you’d grinded all over him. Your memory was on your side now. All it had needed was a prod.   

He did have you there. Your bad. But – “In my defence you supplied the tequila shots.” Although, you had suggested a second round… 

He chuckled, leaning down to nip at your bottom lip. “Stop giving me attitude. It’s turning me on.” 

You stomach flipped, your fingernails digging into the wool blend of his jumper as you held him to you. You wanted to kiss him for hours, because now that you’d started you didn’t want to stop. 

“Should we head back now?” Seokjin asked against a curl of your tongue, one hand against the wall, the other stroking your jaw line. “They’re probably wondering where we both are.” 

“In a moment,” you murmured, a hand of yours bravely dragging down his side. You hit the waistband of his jeans and curled a finger through a belt loop, nudging his crotch flush to yours. Your mouth did the rest of the talking. Sober you wanted what drunk you had missed out on. 

“Fuck,” you heard him mutter, immediately understanding where you wanted this to lead. “Or we can just ditch those losers and go to my place?” He drew back to catch your reaction. “Your place?”

“We can’t do that.” As tempting as that sounded, you couldn’t not attend your own Christmas party you’d spent weeks organising. Seokjin was hot, but he wasn’t that hot. Plus, it would way too suspicious if you both just disappeared… 

Seokjin agreed with a little sigh. “Yeah, you’re right.” 

That didn’t mean you couldn’t think of other ideas though…

“What are you doing?” Seokjin asked, moving back slightly as you wrestled for your phone in your skirt pocket. He watched you search for Jungkook’s name in your phonebook – you were sure you still had his number from when you’d had to “mentor” him the first week he’d arrived. Success! You did! You hurriedly text him. 

(13:31pm) You: I can’t find him. Start without us but LEAVE me some food

He replied immediately. He was probably withering away by now, the poor boy. 

(13:32pm) Jungkook: Oh man Jin is so fucking dead  (13:32pm) Jungkook: Tell him I love him before you stick the knife in 🤪 (13:32pm) You: Sure thing 

You looked up at Seokjin and grinned. “Just bought us half an hour.”

He looked impressed, an eyebrow cocked as he regarded you. “What are we going to do in half hour? – and please don’t say kill me.” 

You giggled – actually giggled. Damn him. You reached for his belt loop again, tugging it gently. “Whatever it is, we can’t do it out in the hallway.” 

You were playing a very dangerous game here. Out in the open, at your place of work. The storeroom was probably an even sillier idea – but that’s where you ended up dragging him into, flipping on the light to save being surrounded in darkness. You were 99% sure the surveillance cameras didn’t work on this floor anyway, so…

“You’re crazy,” he laughed weakly in disbelief, stumbling over an (empty) mop bucket as he went to reach for you. 

“And you love it,” you smirked against his mouth, your arms wrapping around his neck. 

The urge took over again, now in the privacy of the storage cupboard you were free to do whatever you liked. Seokjin grew hard against you quickly, your mouths locked together in haste as his palms felt up your ass. It wasn’t long before he picked you up, your legs wrapping around his middle as he continued to kiss you greedily against the wall. His hands slipped  under your skirt, cupping your ass and you tried to circle your hips as best you could, feeling his erection through the layers of your tights and underwear, both of you straining out moans and grunts. 

“I’m having déjà vu,” he grinned, lowering his mouth to nip at your neck. You gasped, pushing into him and he took the opportunity to begin to kiss your throat. Just like last time… Déjà vu, indeed. 

Breaking away he looked between your bodies, the band of white wool along your skirt protecting your modesty, but only just. “You weren’t dressed as Mrs. Claus though.” He sunk his teeth into your neck once more, a little harder this time and you jerked, yelping as you squeezed the tops of his arms. He liked that reaction, licking a broad strip up the column of your throat, getting you all kinds of wet and sticky. 

No doubt between your legs matched. You were hot, and impatient, and Seokjin’s mouth was evil. Especially when he lifted his head, dark fringe in his eyes, and smirked at you. Fuck, you really wanted him. Your heart was doing somersaults. 

“A fucking sexy Mrs. Claus.” 

You immediately rolled your eyes. Why was he ruining it? You were not about to partake in some sordid Christmas roleplay fantasy of his… “Just shut up and kiss me.” 

He didn’t really feel like answering back. 

A few minutes later you were placed back on the floor, your legs a little shaky as you clung to him, mouths still unrelenting. You were both heavy breathed and burning with desire. He pinned you to the wall with his thigh, separating your legs and giving you something else to grind against as his lips trailed the expanse of your throat, his fingers digging into the meat of your ass so hard you wouldn’t be surprised if he teared your hosiery. 

You were weak, slick against your underwear and desperate for some sort of release. Seokjin panted against your ear. “Do you remember what you said that night?” Moaning was all you could give in reply. “You wanted my dick. You were begging for it.” 

Hearing him speak like that drove you wild. “Mmhm. Remind me.” You could vaguely remember, too pent up to get embarrassed. 

He moved his thigh, pressing his crotch flush to yours and hooked a finger under your chin, lifting your face so he could kiss you again. You could feel his erection and unable to hold off any longer you reached between you and wrapped your hand around him. You could recall doing this before, Seokjin stopping you, but this time he did no such thing. Instead, he pushed into your touch, his voice thick with something that made you shiver as he spoke. 

“You drive me crazy… Every god damn day…” 

Your mind was a little too preoccupied to truly concentrate on his words but they seemed to stir something inside of you. Nudge something that had been forgotten. You couldn’t place it, but it had to do with last weekend. Something he’d said to you… before he’d kissed you… You couldn’t remember but the faintest of memories made you glow. 

“W-we should really just head to my place,” Seokjin stammered slightly, keening into your touch. You were sure his thighs were trembling, all the blood in his dick turning him weak. 

“There’s no need,” you breezed, and before you could take a moment to reconsider you were dropping to your knees. 

“Fuck, what are you doing?” He was practically beside himself, fingers digging into your shoulders as he watched you reach for the buttons on his jeans. 

“What do you think?” 

He sighed exhaustedly, a red flush beginning to travel its way up his neck, peeking above the collar of his sweater. “You’re trying to kill me.” 

Whatever he’d been expecting to happen in here hadn’t been you sucking his dick, you could tell. You took great pleasure in that. It was fun getting this kind of reaction from him. Truth was, when the mood struck, the mood struck, and you wanted him – badly. 

He watched you unbutton him, his black underwear coming into view – Calvin Klein, the band told you, and above that, where his jumper had ridden up, you could see a sliver of smooth tan skin – You just knew he was hiding a great body under there, but now wasn’t the time for stripping. You needed to be quick. 

You tugged his jeans down a little past his hips, enough for easy access. “You really want to kill–ughgh –!” 

He broke off with a surprised moan, your hand reaching inside his boxers to pull out his dick. Wrapping your palm around the base you gripped automatically, staring at what you could only describe as his third leg, with a slack jaw. “Of course you have a fucking massive dick,” you muttered, feeling a little unnerved. 

Surprise immediately dissipating, Seokjin gave you a smirk. “That obvious, huh?”

You breathed heavily through your nose, beginning to run your fist along his length on instinct. It was a good looking dick, you’d give him that. Tense at your sudden movements, Seokjin soon eased up, watching you carefully. You looked up at him, giving him a tiny, slightly shy smile… There really was no going back now. Not that you wanted to. Things had changed and they were going to change even more after this… 

“Come on,” he murmured, a hand reaching out to stroke your cheek. His voice sounded dangerous, low and honeyed as he gazed at you on your knees for him. “Suck it like I know you want to…” 

You scoffed, although surely he could see the effect he had on you. You weren’t bluffing anybody, not even yourself. “Don’t rush me.” 

Seokjin looked amused, but that soon changed when you swiped your tongue across the head of his cock in one fluid and determined motion. His knees pretty much buckled, a hand reaching for the side of your head, his fingers weaving into your hair. You chuckled a little mischievously, your lips wrapped around him, knowing the vibrations would fuck with his head some more. Seokjin laughed stiffly along, knowing what you were up to – knowing you loved having this sort of effect on him – but it sounded strained, wavering in the middle as his eyes locked with yours, the veins in his neck beginning to bulge with the strain. 

You moved, wrapping your lips around him further, your tongue washing against the hot skin and he stumbled forward a little, a grunt slipping from his mouth. That fuelled you, slipping him deeper, your tongue tracing patterns along the underside before you pulled back and repeated. You weren’t kidding when you said he had a massive dick, it was almost daunting, but you found a way around it, massaging your fist along the base of him in time with your mouth until you found a confident rhythm. 

“Oh, fuck.” 

That boosted your ego too, taking great pleasure in the way you seemed to have stunned Seokjin into more or less complete silence. He wasn’t very cocky right now, was he? If you had known sucking his dick would shut him up, you’d have done it long ago – or maybe that was your own horniness talking… Who knew right now. 

You popped off him, running your palm wider, further along to circle over the head, your saliva acting as lubrication, quiet squelching noises slipping from between your fingers. You smirked up at him, “Am I still boring?”

It took him a moment to process your question, his body hunched, surrendering to the pleasure, and you admired the way his lips parted, each breath audible as he stared down at you, dark eyes glazed over. God, he was hot. How had you been so unbothered by him for so long? 

Shaking his head, he halfway came to. “Sucking my dick in a storeroom, can’t get any wilder than this. Well done, you proved me wrong.” 

That was nice to hear. You liked it when he was wrong, mainly because you loved being right. You wrapped your free hand around the top of his thigh, needing the support as you took his dick in your mouth again. Feeling ambitious you willed yourself to relax as you eased along him, taking him deeper, beginning to bob back and forth, the faintest of noises escaping the back of your throat. 

It drove him crazy, his head falling back as he whined. “If this is all just to prove a point and you stop before I cum, I’m going to cry like a motherfucking baby.” 

You tried to laugh but ended up choking, gagging on his cock – unflattering surely, but he seemed to love it, his eyes flashing as he cupped your hand that gripped his girth, gently pulling it away to place on his other thigh. He didn’t want his view obstructed he watched. Besides, you didn’t need your hand as a safety net anymore anyway…

“Fu-ck, you look so good sucking my dick,” he awed, his voice hoarse. He tightened the hold he had on your hair, the fingers of his other hand brushing rouge strands out of your face. You looked up at him, mouth stuffed and he smirked. It made your core pulse. “On your knees. You couldn’t get down there quick enough.” 

A moan slipped from your throat, pulsating against his cock. Of course the guy had a filthy mouth, it should’ve been obvious. What was shocking though, was the effect it had on you. Dirty talk was cringeworthy in your eyes, not many men could pull it off – not even Namjoon – but words like that coming from Seokjin?! You were sure you’d just freshly drenched your underwear. It would surely be a slip ‘n’ slide down there when he finally got his hands on you – If he got his hands on you. Fuck, he better. 

A nudge of his hips cut short your momentary distraction, realising that Seokjin was beginning to thrust ever so slightly into your mouth. He noticed your attention on him and asked hesitantly, “This okay?” 

“Mhmmhmm,” you hummed, gurgling a little which seemed to drive him a little crazy. You let him take control, concentrating on breathing through your nose and pleasuring him with your tongue as he gently fucked your mouth. 

You were losing your mind, hazy pleasure blurring your vision and clouding your thoughts.  Rationality was out the window long ago, all that you knew was the red, hot want you had for him. The Christmas party and the fact you were risking your job right now didn’t come into play, all you cared about was chasing that desire. 

Looking up at Seokjin you noticed his eyes were closed now, his chin tilted towards the ceiling, expression contorted with pleasure as the quietest of moans escaped his throat with each rugged breath he took. You pulsed down below, only this time the urge burned its way up your body, getting hotter as he quickened his motions, seemingly losing himself, seemingly pursuing his end. 

He pulled back abruptly during one withdraw, breath shaky as he kept the tip of his cock inside your mouth, as if he couldn’t bear to be apart from the warm wetness. You sucked firmly, catching his gaze and he just about lost it, eyes rolling into the back of his skull. 

“Shit,” he cursed, ever so slightly nudging further into you, edging himself almost. You darted the tip of your tongue along his slit, earning yourself a soft hiss. His thighs were trembling, you could feel the vibrations under your palm and his neck was thick and tense with strain, patched red, as he tried his might to gain some control over the pleasure you were giving him. “J-Just checking, there’s no chance we’ll have sex in here, right?” 

His voice trembled too, all light and airy and so unlike his voice that you were familiar with. His eyes were blow wide as he gaped down at you, his lips plumper than you’d ever seen them before. He was beautiful. Damn, you really wanted to kiss him again… 

You slid away, cupping your hand around his dick to jerk him off ever so slowly, a couple of inches along the base. He was more than slick now, coated in your spit, flesh veiny and angry red. Shifting on your knees, ignoring the cricks to power on through, you shrugged. “Not unless you carry condoms with you at work.” 

He pondered for a moment. “I can’t say I do.” That caused you to chuckle, leaning in to curl your tongue against the side of his cock. He startled, a loud moan escaping that was surely unnecessary, but it did wonders for your ego. 

He tightened his hold on your head, angling you to the tip of his dick, desperate to get back into your warmth. “So you won’t be disappointed when I inevitably bust a nut?” 

You raised an eyebrow, his cock drawing translucent patterns against your lips as you replied. “That’s why I’m down here.” 

He whimpered, the sheer thought of coming exciting him further. You slipped him back inside, feeling him grip his fingers into your hair, anchoring himself – and you, in preparation. 

“Oh, ffuck,” he muttered, watching you begin to meet every thrust his hips gave you. You were determined, eager for him to cum. You hadn’t sucked dick in so long but now you were in your element, each reaction from Seokjin, no matter how small, encouraging you. The fact he was hiding a foot long in his pants was now no issue at all. You were a pro, just like in all aspects of life. 

A strange sound left the back of Seokjin’s throat, almost as if he was getting strangled and his shoulders slumped, the rest of him growing stiff. “Where am I doing this?” He asked weakly. “Y/N?” He demanded pretty shrilly when you didn’t reply. 

You weren’t relenting, somehow pushing him deeper into your mouth and down your throat and he groaned loudly, blunt nails digging into your scalp. “You want me to cum down your throat?” 

Ding Ding. Clever Seokjin. 

You nodded widely around his girth, gagging a little a process, but this time you owned it. He loved it. 

“Fuck.” He grunted, spreading his feet a little, planting himself to the tiles. “You really want my fucking cum.” 

You moaned, sending a fire of vibrations up his dick and you knew you had him. His hips stilled almost instantly, his cock rammed inside your mouth and you readjusted, using your tongue to coax his release. He came with a deep exhale like moan, stumbling forward with a surprised grunt as one of his hands reached out to slam into the wall behind you. You held him steady with your hands flat against his thighs, swallowing his cum down quickly because you definitely had a love hate relationship with the stuff. Dealt with swiftly, you more than welcomed it. 

Seokjin softly chuckled down at you as he fell from your mouth, now well on his way to growing flaccid and eased off as you straightened your back and made motions to stand (on shaky legs). He tucked himself back inside his underwear, the snap of the waistband making you flutter. Flutter where you wanted him to touch the most. 

You felt warmth as he hooked a hand around your hip, pulling you to him with a bashful grin. “That was worth getting fired for.” 

You giggled, wiping the sides of your mouth with the back of your hand before cupping the back of his neck, dragging him closer as you backed up against the wall. You liked when he crowded around you, liked feeling him against your body. Your body that was screaming for him right now… 

“No one’s getting fired,” you reassured, voice a murmur and then either you or he connected your mouths again. Couldn’t tell who – it was probably both of you. It was amusing that you were the one assuring him, Miss. Uptight who worried about every single little thing. He was the one was supposed to be carefree, yet this had all been your idea. 

Your hand dragged down his chest, feeling the hardness of his pecs, and for a split second you thought about taking him up on the offer of ditching the party and driving to his place. You wanted to get him naked, wanted to see what you could feel, and you really wanted to fuck him. Yet, you knew it was a bad idea. Even worse than sucking dick on the second floor of the office building. Possibly. 

“How long do you think we have before they throw a search party?” Seokjin asked, cupping your face with one hand as the other snaked down to your ass. 

“We still have time.” 

You and Seokjin were always at one another’s throats, no one would guess you were actually getting it on directly underneath them… You were positive. 

“Hm. Enough for me to return the favour?” He contemplated. 

You made a noise of agreement, nodding eagerly as you stretched for his mouth, unable to just. Stop. Kissing. Him. 

It turned hot and heavy immediately, decision now made, and you grasped at one another, kissing wildly. “I love touching you,” he grunted against your tongue, hands gripping anything he could. You had to agree, especially his shoulders. You’d never felt anything like them in your entire life, no wonder he had the upper body strength to hold you up. He was big. Big big, and it was driving you crazy. 

“This ass,” he growled, pulling away from your lips as both hands cupped the rounds of flesh, giving them a very keen and firm squeeze. Skirt bunched up at your hips he had the perfect access. You moaned, the heat between your bodies becoming unbearable and you nearly collapsed into him when one of his hands found its way to your core, cupping the sensitive flesh hesitantly. That was until he felt how soaked you were. It had seeped through your underwear, dampening your tights. It felt heavy and uncomfortable but you guessed that was soon to change now that he’d gotten his hands on you… 

“So fucking wet,” he purred, dropping his height a little to meet your eyes. His fingers slipped inside your panties, his index and middle finger running along your folds before a knuckle found your clit, your hips bucking. He rubbed the bundle of nerves rather lightly, but it was enough. You were beside yourself, any pleasure, however slight, blowing your mind. You moaned sweetly, hot air puffing against Seokjin’s lips. He smirked. “Someone’s very responsive.”

“Please,” you moaned, however you weren’t too sure what you needed to beg for. 

He loved it though, smirking wider. “There she is.” 

“Please, Seokjin,” you repeated, clutching to the neck of his sweater. Hazy memories of last weekend drifted into the forefront of your mind. Begging him for his dick. Sadly, you couldn’t have that right now, but there was always second best. 

Leaning in as if to kiss you he pulled back last minute, a teasing lilt to his tone as he asked you a question. “What do you want, baby?” 

You moaned again, the pet name not so bad after all and pressed into his touch, the headiness in his voice making you tremble with need. Your answer was simple. “Your fingers.”  

Seokjin wasted no time, yanking his hand away to tug at your hosiery. They didn’t budge, so he moved his other hand from your ass to help. Maybe the light sheen of sweat that painted your skin had stuck tight the nylon – or maybe he was just useless… 

“What the hell are these?” He huffed, clearly impatient. 

“Stop, you’re going to rip them,” you told him off. All you needed was to walk back inside the office with laddered tights… How very unsuspicious… 

“They’re dumb.” 

“I’m sorry,” you exclaimed, “wasn’t expecting us to be getting it on today.”

Seokjin paused what he was doing to shoot you a look of sheer judgement. “Getting it on?”

“Shut up,” you grumbled. Yes, maybe your choice of words were lame, but it still stood. You were getting it on right now!

He laughed and tugged at the waistband one last time, finally succeeding but also yanking down your underwear in the process. 

“Let me see you,” he strained out, gripping your hips and you had no time to feel embarrassed by your sudden waist-down nakedness. His eyes drunk up your soaked core, before he looked up at your face again, his right hand reaching for you, each brush of his fingertips turning you boneless. “Fuck. You have the best pussy I’ve ever seen.” 

He was kissing you again, pushing you further into the wall. Pussy. Under all circumstances that word was just yuck, but once again, coming from Seokjin it didn’t seem so bad anymore. It made your core leap, but that might have been something to do with the way he was nestling a deft, long finger inside of you. Your walls clenched around the intrusion as you moaned into his mouth and you gripped at his shoulders, rolling your hips as he started to curl the digit against your warmth. 

Ever so carefully he added a second finger, the burn easing quickly as pleasure took over. His thumb rubbed messy circles against your clit, your arousal beginning to squelch audibly inside the small room. You hooked your arms around his neck instead, pulling him closer and he grunted into your mouth, sounding unlike himself. 

“Seokjin–!” You mewled, falling from his mouth to catch your breath.

“Yeah, me,” he smirked, his free had rubbing small circles into your hip as he continued to give you what you wanted. “I love it when you say my name.” His lips landed on your throat and you pushed your head to the side, pretty sure you were moaning too loudly now but the stimulation was too good to ignore. You grew wetter. His fingers easily sliding in and out of you as he started to finger you quicker, the lewd squelching sticking inside your ears. 

“You’re soaked, Y/N. Did I do this?” He murmured against your ear before nibbling your lobe. You shuddered. “Sucking my dick made you so horny.” The hand on your hip slid to your ass, and he squeezed the meat hard, using it as leverage to go even faster. You squeezed around his fingers tightly, crying out. 

But then there was nothing but emptiness as he pulled them out, making you gasp out in shock. He looked playfully smug. “What’s up? Lost your voice?”

This fucker. Jungkook was right, you were going to murder him. Only not for going AWOL but for not giving you the orgasm you craved. Seokjin’s wet hand massaged the inside of your thigh, and you squeezed your legs together trying your best to ease the tension that was building up. 

“Seokjin, don’t fuck around.” You told him sternly, although your voice was anything but calm. 

“Am I fucking around?” He asked, grinning from ear to ear as he lowered his shoulders and stole another look at your needy heat. Something inside him changed then, as he let out a curse. “Shit. I wanna taste you.” His eyes pleaded with you. “Can taste you?” 

You were nodding before you realised, although you weren’t about to say please again – 

you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction. Instead you exhaled out a shaky yes. 

Squatting immediately he pulled the nylon passed your knees, lifting a foot to slip off one of your heels, the leg of your hosiery following soon after. You wobbled as he raised your foot higher and you reached out for his shoulders to steady yourself. 

“I got you,” he reassured. “I just need to spread you a little.” Hooking your foot on the bottom shelf of the cabinet next to you, your legs widened, giving him perfect access to where you needed him the most. “There,” he said, looking pleased with himself. 

His gaze soon darkened when he got a look at you and you braced yourself against the wall as he stalked nearer, a palm cupping your thigh before he followed the curve with his mouth, kissing his way closer and closer to your core. You groaned softly when his lips parted around your clit, warmth flooding you, slowly inking its way through your veins and darting his tongue out he brushed it against you slowly, repeating with the same rhythm until you were squirming, a hand reaching for his hair just for something to grip. 

He sped up, learning what your body liked quickly, dropping to one knee to sink further into you. You moaned pretty loudly when you felt his fingers press against your entrance, slipping inside, and you took him greedily and nosily, pushing into his tongue that had now curled around your clit as he sucked softly. 

You fell to pieces. Fingernails dragging along his scalp as you tugged at his hair. Which he seemed to love, by the way. If his grunting was anything to go by, his movements more determined, firmer. Each time he sucked, point of his tongue flicking against you, you lost it a bit more, gasping out in pleasure. Boy knew how to use his mouth, you were pleasantly surprised. 

He pulled back, his breath a little ragged and replaced his tongue with the pad of his thumb, rubbing tight, firm circles against your sticky clit. “You like getting your clit sucked. Noted.” He grinned, sending your stomach flipping. His mouth and chin were covered in your arousal, which he made no attempt to clean off. In fact, he went immediately back for seconds, licking a wide strip up your whole core, noises of satisfaction leaving him. 

“God, Seokjin,” you murmured weakly, dizzy and trembling. If he kept this up you were going to cum very soon. Especially with the way his fingers caressed your insides, pressing deep until he hit something that had you yelping. 

He looked triumphant as he dropped to both knees now, looking up at you, watching your reaction as he repeatedly curled against your g-spot. You squirmed around, pleasure becoming a little unbearable but oh, so addictive. 

“So, no one ends up fucking at the office Christmas party, huh?” He asked nonchalantly. This fucker was really having a casual conversation with you as he tried to bring you to your knees. By his smug grin, he knew what he was doing. 

Well, not on your watch. 

You bit back a moan, and shrugged, trying your best to sound normal. “We’re not going all the way so technically, that still stands.” 

He laughed loudly, genuinely amused, but his fingers had other ideas. He pulled out halfway, straightening his digits to fuck into you – hard. You choked out, feeling him slowly withdraw, letting you catch your breath before he repeated. And repeated. And repeated…

You were close to seeing stars, the moans rolling freely from your mouth as you clung to his hair. He was evil. “Seok–oh, shit,” you cursed, feeling him deep inside you yet again. “Seokjinnn.” 

“What is it, babe?” He asked, acting oblivious. At the name you clenched around his soaked fingers. “I knew you loved it when I called you that.” You didn’t have time to chew him out because his tongue was washing against your clit again, curling around it, prodding it, sucking it… Your eyes rolled back, a thin sheen of sweat coating your neck and chest, and you knew you weren’t long for this world. You were ten seconds away from becoming a puddle on the floor. 

“Gonna cum, baby?” You squeezed around his fingers again, clit pulsing against his tongue. “You love that too.” You could feel his shit eating grin against you but didn’t care.  

“Don’t stop,” you demanded, out of breath. 

“Not planning on it,” he affronted, licking up your folds once again. You gasped loudly, clenching your eyes tightly closed. You were hanging over the pinnacle, just a little more and you’d fall. You were this close to coming and you might explode in the process. 

“I’m going to make this pussy cum so good. So fucking good,” Seokjin almost goaded, which was in fact, what pushed you over the edge. You came with a loud, strained cry, white hot pleasure that exploded behind your eyelids. 

He made sure to rinse you for all you were worth, until you were writhing out of his grip, your grasp on his hair easing and then he was jumping to his feet, his mouth suddenly on yours with a grunt, kissing you like crazy. You couldn’t tell who was out of breath more.

“Tonight.” He announced ferociously. “Tonight. Please come over and let me fuck you.” 

You moaned at the thought, your tongues turning messy as you tried to concentrate and form words. “My place. I live alone. We can be as loud as we like.” 

.

.

Five minutes later you were back in your tights, knees wobbling together as you tried to slip into your shoe. There wasn’t time for more chitchat – or kissing, you needed to get back to the office before someone came looking for you both. 

“So does that mean you forgive me over Rosal & Steinar?” Seokjin asked curiously, still fairly out of breath. He’d wiped his mouth now, in attempt to clean himself up, but his bangs were slightly kinked, forehead shiny and his cheeks were very much still red. 

You turned to him and smirked. “Another orgasm and maybe.” 

He chuckled. “I’m positive that can be arranged.” You didn’t doubt it. “No, but really,” he carried on, taking you by surprise when he clasped your hand, rooting you to the spot. “You know I had to do it, right? I felt terrible but there weren’t many options.” 

His eyes pooled with sincerity and you found yourself softening, growing touched. It was nice to know he hadn’t done it out of spite – although why he would have seemed pretty ludicrous to believe now… No, you’d just been bitter. 

“I know, Seokjin,” you smiled, giving his hand a squeeze. “I’ve forgotten about it.” He looked a little sceptical. “I forgive you,” you insisted with a laugh. It was either he closed the deal or they found another company… They were legitimately the only two options. You got it. 

He returned your smile, finally accepting your reassurance, and you tugged at his hand, opening the storeroom door. You needed to leave. Now. 

But –

Turning back at him over your shoulder, you shot him a playful grin. “Doesn’t mean I won’t steal them back next year though.” 

His eyes widened in surprise before they lit up, his laughter loud down the empty hallway.

“Game on, baby.”

.

.

“Do I look acceptable?” 

You and Seokjin were mere inches from the door leading into the office, your whispers nervous as you hesitated about going inside. You needed to get your best lying face on. ASAP.

“Hang on,” you said, reaching up to adjust his Santa’s hat. The flush on his face had paled, thankfully. “There we go. What about me?”

“Hm.” He pondered, cupping your face to stare down at you, worrying you actually. “I still think we look like we were giving mad head in the storeroom.” 

“Stop,” you groaned, pulling away from him as you realised he was only teasing. You were still pretty sticky downstairs, but you were sure you looked visibly presentable. “You’re going to make it obvious.” 

Finally plucking up the courage, you pushed the door open and stepped inside, Seokjin following. Your Christmas playlist grew louder instantly and of course, the first person you saw was Jungkook, ass perched on your desk for some reason, snacking on a bowl of olives. He popped them like they were grapes. He better not have dripped olive oil over your keyboard, you’d kill him. 

“Ah, look who turned up to their own party,” he exclaimed, standing up. He dropped the bowl right next to your desktop and wiped his fingers into his jeans, striding towards you both. 

You took a deep breath and went for that Oscar. “Blame Seokjin,” you fumed. 

“Where the hell did you disappear to?” He laughed, directing his question to Seokjin who stood behind you still. 

“I, uh... I...” 

You rolled your eyes inwardly. If he fucked this up, well then, he wasn’t fucking you tonight…

“I went to grab a cake.” 

A fucking cake. He’d walked in empty handed. Great white lie there, Seokjin… 

Jungkook looked back and forth between you, his face contorting in confusion. “So... Where is the cake?” 

“Uh.” 

You needed to save this idiot. “Dummy forgot to order it,” you sneered, walking past Jungkook to grab the bowl of olives. 

“Hey,” Seokjin exclaimed, sounding way too offended for it to be acting, just as Jungkook burst into laughter. You didn’t know what Seokjin expected, he’d walked straight into that one. 

“I really thought she’d killed you,” Jungkook told his friend, whacking his shoulder. Seokjin’s eyes widened in warning, a hand coming out to karate slice the younger guy’s neck. 

“I went easy on him,” you grinned, stopping them before they started wrestling for real. “– Y’know, Christmas spirit and all that.” 

That caught Seokjin’s attention. You looked at one another properly for the first time since you’d stepped inside. Eyebrows raised he looked entertained. “You went easy on me?” 

“Yup,” you nodded, unable to hide your smirk.

His expression changed for a split second, a glimmer in his eyes that made you mildly feverish at the thought of him getting his hands on you later on. 

“Duly noted,” was all he replied, and you shared a smile before Jungkook interrupted. 

“I saved you both some food. Come on,” he motioned with his hand. 

“Thanks, JK,” Seokjin bellowed, clapping his back. 

You followed behind them, nerves easing up. “Yeah, thanks, Jungkook.” 

.

.

If anything, Seokjin was the one who got grilled the most during the rest of the party, he had been the one to disappear after all, so it was fun watching him squirm as Hoseok demanded answers. He looked a right fool for “forgetting” to order a cake, but he’d brought it all on himself so you couldn’t feel too sorry for him… 

He was also risking a lot when he felt up your ass as you were finding his stupid Secret Santa gift in your desk drawer, ready to exchange with everyone. You straightened up immediately, pushing his hand away just in case anyone noticed – Mina was literally a desk away from you, although she was too busy giggling at Jungkook who was acting up on the karaoke machine to notice anything. 

Seokjin winked as you glared at him. “Can’t wait for tonight.” 

You pointed your index finger between his eyes. “Behave or I’ll cancel.” 

But, you both knew you were just talking shit… 

Written 2020 - 2021.  Please refrain from posting my work elsewhere. No translations allowed. © floralseokjin 2021

[emersonfreepress]

Yo wassup, it's ya boi Spanish pet name anon back at it again with more random mc facts. (is this cringe-enough yet? good.) ((this is just an info dump, so please don't feel the need to read all of this shit, lol))

More random info bout my babe:

(Kinda political, I guess? seriously, you don't have to post this if you don't want to) Spent a year and a half in juvie for "Attempted Arson" after helping burn down a superrich alt-right Nazi dickhead's poolhouse. My boy had just turned 14, and the only reason they got caught was because one of the kids in the group he did it with ratted him and the others out.

Unsurprisingly made friends with other baby anarchists while in juvie and still tries to keep in touch with them once he got out. (kinda political over, lol)

Moving onto something a little less (or more depending on the person) polarizing.

(religion CW) He's an ex-catholic, and I see him as coming from a religious background/family. Never really liked the whole fire and brimstone, repent or die spiel he grew up having to listen to. The only things he really appreciated about his religion were how pretty the stained glass windows the old church in his hometown had and, as he got older, the really buff angel statues/paintings. Does get nostalgic when he hears the reverberation of organ music. Still has the little gold cross baby necklace he got when he was baptized. (religion CW over)

The only person he could really relate to in his family was his mother's sister, his Aunt Isobel. Always looked up to her because of how much of a badass she is. (I could honestly talk about her for days, lol.)

Speaking of his aunt, she was the first person he ever came out to. He initially never really labeled his sexuality, but he'd later feel comfortable falling under the pansexual and demiromantic labels as he got older.

He's also nonbinary! He was never bothered being called by the pronouns he was given at birth, but being called "son" or "boy" didn't really fit right. He's always felt that his agab shouldn't get to dictate and define what he calls himself.

I could go on and on, honestly, so I'm just gonna stop here, lol! If you are interested in hearing more about my boy, let me know! Also, let me know if this is annoying as fuck, and I'll stop!

Anyway, I hope you're having a good day and that you have a lovely weekend! ❤😊

well i mean "alt-right" is a newfangled 2010s term made to sanitize contemporary Christian fascism to the general public... but like anyway 😆 i digress lol i know what you mean here. the anarchist scene in Emerson is tiny lol good job on them for finding some fellow babies somehow

This is what I'd call Super Headcanon-y since MC's family has always been pretty secular 😅 But coming out to their aunt makes total sense!! I legit might make that a background option for queer MCs, it's that correct and good.

I don't mind this btw! Took me forever to publish it, but I do love hearing about people's New Kids 🥰

[astrovian]

the official ranking of RA photoshoot outfits (pt. 1)

as @dykethorin​ said when I first proposed doing this particular ranking,  “Some real Decisions™️ were made” with these shoots y’all

all photoshoot outfits (for part one) under the cut

the official ranking of Daniel Miller outfits here

the official ranking of Adam Price outfits here

the official ranking of Claude Becker outfits here

guys, I’m crying with laughter

hey quick question: what the fuck was this photoshoot??? (and also I need current RA in these poses)

it’s real nice to see a fun, loosey-goosey RA (before he established himself in the broody-character archetype) but there are so many questionable fashion choices here

when I started this list I had two options:

1)     allow some leeway to the older photoshoots because, let’s be real, the early 2000s were an atrocious time for fashion that a lot of us would most rather forget we participated in

2)     judge them by today’s standards, which is harsh but some of these outfits deserve it

naturally, I chose option #2

It’s so hard to even pick where to start. the too-loose pants? the ill-fitting suit jacket? The untucked dress shirt that is for some god-forsaken reason undone in two separate directions??

I have chosen one thing that sums the outfit up as a whole: what monster decided to put the shirt collar over the suit jacket????

the jazz hands scream “hey I’m a FUN guy” but the suit screams “I’m the yo-pro asshole at the office who is so unreliable you’re pretty sure some nepotism must surely have had an influence during the hiring process”

I originally said ‘I guess we should be glad there’s no surfer necklace’ but then I had the horrifying realisation that it’s a 50/50 shot as to whether that would improve this outfit or make it worse. and you know when there’s even slimmest chance a surfer necklace could improve an outfit somehow that it’s time to take a good hard look at yourself

1/10 just because this photoshoot made me genuinely laugh out loud

wait I’m sorry, what-

how on god’s green earth is this the same photoshoot (?) as guys, I’m crying with laughter????

the great thing about these lists is that you are getting my genuine reactions as I progress down the images. I had no idea this was the same photoshoot (?) until approximately 10 seconds after writing guys, I’m crying with laughter

this perfectly encapsulates the duality of man – one moment it’s all goofy jazz hands and the next it’s a hunk-of-the-week moment

this man and guys, I’m crying with laughter are the equivalent of looking at pictures of yourself in high school vs. in your 20s/30s/at your prime. the whiplash is insane

and why is he in front of barred windows?? it appears they were afraid of what would happen if this hunk escaped into the general population

I still can’t believe they kept the collar over the suit jacket though

I’m so conflicted guys, the urge to numerically rank this terrible outfit is strong but uh… as per usual shirtless ones aren’t fair/10

revenge of the killer surfer necklace

do you ever look back at a specific moment in time and are so thankful that someone took one tiny action? one small thing they did in the heat of the moment that probably seemed innocuous at the time but had far-reaching consequences? for example, it might something as simple as deciding to take a umbrella on a bright sunny day only for it to be extremely useful on the way home when the weather turns

this is how I feel about the person who decided RA could leave that top button closed for this shoot

if you squint, you can see the surfer necklace under that top button. and thank god you have to squint

this is such an early 2000s look though. that shirt by itself is fine and would actually look killer with a properly fitted suit nowadays. it’s the shirt dress and loose denim look with makes no sense to me

2/10 for a pretty uninspiring early 2000s outfit

revenge of the uh… 

from the same shoot as revenge of the killer surfer necklace this loses .1 of a mark for adding a jacket, while pretty innocuous, to an already busy outfit

1.9/10

were we really that afraid of legs?

why were we, as a society, so obsessed with loose, ill-fitting pants? why were we so desperate to conceal legs from the general population? what secrets were we trying to hide? I understand the comfort factor on the hand, but on the other did anyone actually have eyes

the sneakers/suit combo I can definitely live with. but those pants (that I’m convinced must be pyjama pants in another life) turns it all into a sloppy, blurry mess

2.7/10

is it a bird? is it a plane? no, it’s… a floating RA?

what is it about photoshoots in the early 2000s where they just make no damn sense. it’s my opinion that the theme/concept of a shoot should not overshadow the subject, and that’s the correct opinion (as well as being the exact opposite as to what’s happening here)

maybe there was a hint or reason as to why floating wizard RA exists in the article that this shoot presumably came with, but I don’t get it. clearly I’m far too literal of a person and need to embrace my inner artist

looks pretty, still weird

moving on the entire point of this post, the outfit, I uh,… oh god

I’m pretty sure this the same (and similar, if not) outfit RA wore in the North & South behind-the-scenes, and how we as a society went from John Thornton’s stiff collar and top hat to this is amazing

maybe we were so obsessed with period dramas back then because it was a nice alternative to indulge our eyes in when we had to face the harsh, cold reality of modern fashion at the time

anyway – trust me, while I am all for a man in a necklace, let’s pray surfer necklaces never come back 2.9/10

I genuinely was looking up “pinstriped jacket jokes” because I couldn’t think of anything off the top of my head but then I realised I don’t need a joke here because pinstriped jackets are a joke all by themselves

I feel like there may be a situation where pinstriped suit jackets might grow on me, but this is not that situation

also I don’t really know where I stand on the belt, but I certainly think I’m leaning towards the ‘why’ part of the scale. if you’re gonna make a belt that prominent in a photoshoot, at least make it a fun belt

3/10

I’m noticing a trend in these photoshoots and it’s these horrific backgrounds

I will admit that the non-patterned suit jacket is going with the jeans a lot better here. but now that my attention isn’t focused on that, all I can see are the dress shoes. WHY DID YOU PUT DRESS SHOES WITH STRAIGHT-LEGGED JEANS???

please someone I am begging you, can we as a society get to tapered jeans already

3.3/10

did RA genuinely ever get put into any clothes that actually fitted him properly at this point in time?

look, I know I’ve been picking on the bootcut jeans & loose attire that plagued us in the early 2000s (or 2006, to be specific to this photoshoot). what can I say, it’s the low-hanging fruit. or loose-hanging, as the case may be

I do appreciate that rich brown leather jacket and that smile. but that’s where it stops. someone take dress shirts and dress shoes away from bootcut denim PLEASE

3.5/10

this is the bad-boy from your hometown in every rom-com ever

as with well this in an interesting development that I can’t say I disapprove of below, the lower rating is simply because from what we can see, it’s just a plain shirt. however, that dipped v-neck? mm-mmm

look at that smirk. this man knows what he’s doing to us, dammit.

why do you persist in hurting us this way 4/10 

well this in an interesting development that I can’t say I disapprove of

god bless the person who said we need this shirt wet and clinging and only half-soaked

I’m so sad that I have to give this such a low ranking because uh… we’ve established I have a weakness for those biceps

this does also get bonus points for the creativity of “only this portion of your shirt needs to be wet for your close-up” but at the end of the day it is a solitary grey t-shirt even if it is floating in an attractive sea of muscles

4.5/10

the photographer really said ‘who gives a crap about the clothes’, huh?

an interesting shirt! but as much as I love RA’s face, we should be able to see more of the shirt (and the outfit) because uh… it’s hard to make a judgement call on a photoshoot outfit without that

also, it’s just so hard to concentrate on some of these with RA staring into my soul like that

*sigh* 4.6/10

hello sir, are you as kinky as your shirt?

this is one of the few occasions on which I will give the bootleg baggy jeans a pass. interesting choice to go shoeless for all outfits in this shoot – but the way the shirt is all crumpled is annoying me an incessant amount. I am begging you, someone pass this stylist an ironing board PLEASE

4.7/10 for a crinkle-cut RA

all that’s missing is the beer cans

I’m not sure of the short sleeves here. I think with the shirt open as well my brain doesn’t know where to look

HOWEVER, this is an RA from the early 2000s that I can get behind – largely because he’s not drowning in his denim

the nice, plain belt which matches with the shirt? excellent

interesting choice to go with the bare feet – this entire look (and the quality of that concrete floor) screams ‘we’re chilling at a summer party in your parent’s basement in the early 2000s’ if not for one thing – that couch is way too nice looking. am I being too pedantic about this? no. If you’re gonna go for the whole basement party look, you need a couch that’s falling apart and has at least one questionable stain on it

that being said, I would hang out in this man’s basement

it’s a shirtless one so once again, I cannot give a numerical answer/10

I’m not sure if this man is dangerous or is just an idiot

they may have been wanting RA to embrace his inner Daniel Miller here but that is NOT a jacket that should have its collar popped or if it is, it definitely should not be popped that much. just turn the intensity of that pop down by… at least 35%

this look is telling me to embrace my inner lacy, ruffled collar that men in England used to wear around the 1500 - 1600s. I hate it and refute it with every part of my soul

this is what happens when you embrace your inner Daniel a little bit too much 5.6/10

the return of the leg monster

not much to say about this except once again we are terrified to put RA’s legs into well-fitted pants. what secrets are hiding underneath those voluminous billows? will we ever know?

5.8/10

the one that crushed my hopes and dreams and then spat on my corpse

so I admit it, I got really excited because I thought that this was a leopard print shirt and I was like “this is something I did NOT know that I needed until right now”, even if I would argue that it could have been nice in a little bit of a brighter colour. no matter, I thought it was a nice subtle addition to this plain suit and was just very excited at the prospect of RA rocking leopard print even though I almost always hate leopard print in single every form it comes in

and then. upon zooming. a disappointing paisley. sorry, paisley lovers. I hate it

I would also argue here that the pocket square would have been nice in a plain, bright colour rather than another patterned item thrown into the mix. come on stylists, stop letting me down with your pocket squares

also if there is a point where a suit can be too shiny, I think we’ve found it. I could wax floors with that fabric and I’d rather be thinking about RA’s talent & good looks rather than imagining him being used as a human mop

the hand porn is uh… strong with this one 6/10

the hand porn one

the ring is a nice subtle touch but I can’t decide where I stand on this tie. for me, the checks are just a *wee* tad too small. so small that it I’m scared it will turn into one of those optical illusions with a number in it if I stare at it the tie for too long

the pocket square could also have not tried so hard to blend in with the rest of the suit jacket. give me some colour, baby!

Richard really needs to put his hand down so I can actually concentrate on the clothes 6.5/10

 I’m just dotty for this one (I’m so sorry y’all)

so suave. so shiny. I wanna stroke that fabric so bad, it looks so soft

the dots bring a nice yet understated touch to a monotone outfit and GOOD LORD those thighs

they just had to pose him like this to torture us, I’m convinced. also they call him a “commanding gentleman” in the subtitle which is really just unnecessary to verbalise when he’s sitting like this

Someone put me in a rom-com with this man 7.2/10

the modern magician (at least he ain’t floating this time)

I know that the hat should be the focus of this shoot but I can’t get over those shoes

tangentially related, I have never understood why they make men’s dress shoes so excessively long and pointed. these certainly aren’t a good example of this but uh… I don’t understand why men’s dress shoes are clown shoes

I think part of what’s throwing me off is the sockless look. normally I can handle (and even love) it with some shoes but there’s something about the hem of those jeans and those shoes that turn them into slippers when worn sockless

I love the two-tone scarf but what really excites me is the plaid shirt that we can barely see. I’m eternally sad that they had RA hid it in this pose. and also, come one. you could’ve at least gotten a chair with an actual back to it. that can’t be good for his back at all

the one bonus of this outfit is the hat because when do we ever get RA in hats?? and hats that aren’t baseball caps?? a nice, rare touch. but also one which hides most of that face so…

can we talk about the fact that my gut tells me those jean cuffs have been deliberately turned up at the front and all I want in life is to reach into this image and flip them down 7.5/10

*pterodactyl noises*

holy macaroni. that demin shirt. and this shirt’s even a nice lighter denim colour??? and the v-neck?? SIR

I know he’s worn some faux-denim shirts in the last few years (see: Uncle Vanya rehearsal pics) but as outerwear? knocked it out of the park in this one

also I know this is a shirt not a jacket, but this shirt made me think about how I never realised how much I needed RA in jean jackets until today

It could be argued that a nice crew neck cut would work slightly better than the v-neck but that’s really a personal choice

a lovely respite for my weary eyes 7.7/10

a truly, truly blessed image. the sort of image that would bring you endless good luck

I know I’ve given a lot of pants crap on this list but these. these are the ones. these are doing the lord’s work for sure. and god bless the person who decided to shoot from this particular side angle.

and then the shirt?? I’m honestly afraid it may rip if he moves. I could leave or take the tie though. it’s not adding a whole lot to this outfit and I would much rather that shirt be uh… open at the top for a glimpse of uh… well. you know.

this RA outfit laughs in the face of all those early 2000s RA outfits 8.1/10

me running to open my phone every time an RA-related notification pops up

my only sadness is that this shoot was in black & white. we need more action-shot RA shoots!

also the subtle plaid?? *chef’s kiss*

well, I said ‘my only sadness’ but is it also me or are both ends of that tie strangely square? that is throwing me off from an otherwise spectacular photoshoot outfit, I won’t lie

8.5/10 for a man of action

this is what we all like to think we look on the way to work. hate to break it to ya - we don’t

god, that wind-ruffled hair. the rustic look provided by both the suit material & the photo editing. that stare over the top of that coffee mug. the casual ‘I just picked up the paper on my way out this morning’

words fail me

would it be weird if I said I would pay money to be able to run my hands through anyone’s hair that looks as soft and wind-swept as that 8.9/10

the comfiest RA

I love. love. love this outfit, especially the sweater. the pant colour goes extremely well with this one and I’m so glad they didn’t just stick him in jeans. the is the softest, comfiest RA and I love it. this is an RA who you can simultaneously share a beer and takeaway with at home, cuddling up on the sofa while you watch a film, as well as an RA who will take you out to eat fancy pasta at an upscale restaurant.

the choice of sitting on a stool is also great. my only real gripe here is the watch (and even that’s a minor one, really). the watch isn’t THAT bad, but it’s chunky face reminds me slightly of the watches boys in my class would wear in middle school. the watch could be a *wee wee tad* slicker, but really, I’m nitpicking here (and this is the only time I will admit to it)

the more I look at it, the more this becomes one of my fav RA pics. the slight smile. the relaxed pose. the hint of hand porn

weirdly, for some reason this picture gives me the exact same comfy and ‘just chilling out’ feeling as when I hear the song “Kiss Me” by Sixpence None the Richer 9.5/10

[alma-berry]

Timeless Horizons

A sweet little Kitty fic, with a special surprise! This is a collaboration with the amazing @toka-sketch​, who made two beautiful illustrations for this story. 

Here’s a little sneak peek of Dru and Ty! You can see the full illustrations of them and Kit down at the bottom, as they are filled with spoilers!

Enjoy ❤

Dru is hiding.

Yes, it’s practically comical by now. She’d spent far too much time trying to avoid closing herself from her family and be more present, but today… she can’t help herself. The institute is just swamped with people, with preparations, with the shadow of old ghosts. The only ghost she actually wished to see was Livvy, who by all means should have been present for her brother’s engagement party. Instead, she dreads of meeting the more corporal ghosts of her past… plenty of whom was invited.

Hens, the hiding. Dru wasn’t stupid enough to do it inside the institute, where early guests and the battalion of her siblings were probably itching to make her fold napkins or whatever if any of them laid eyes on her. She was hiding outside the sanctuary, running her bare toes over the sandy concrete stairs that lead to a road connecting the highway.

In a mundane scenario, this wouldn’t have been the brightest choice for a hiding spot, but everyone uses portals these days anyway… it’s not like Magnus Bane would make a road trip out of it and drive all the way from New York to Los Angeles. Dru was sure he doesn’t even drive to the grocery store, not that he even needed to when he could just snap his fingers and voila!

Dru sighed in frustration, she would have loved to be able to summon up some Carmel corn right about now… hiding is dull work.

A loud sound of something like crackling grew closer to where she sat.

Dru sprang to her feet, not intending to be caught in a welcoming party of any sort. But when she started to head back into the institute, a single dark figure became visible right in front of her.

It was a man, climbing down off his motorcycle. There was something familiar about the fluid movement of his body that made her stop in her place and stare.

Long, strong thighs wrapped in tight dark gear stretched as they lifted themselves off the massive bike. Dru arched her eyebrows and let her gaze linger over the soft leather of the rider’s jacket with quiet appreciation, and latched onto the strands of fair hair that peaked out of the helmet that still lay on his head.

A ring of recognition went through her, and it wasn’t long before she connected the dots. This was Jace Herondale.

She ran towards him, avoiding the questions that his abrupt appearance brought up - where was Clary? How did he bring his motorcycle from New York? And most importantly, was it the one that could fly?

Before she could call for him, the man lifted his helmet and a curtain of long, golden curls fell on his neck. Dru’s breath caught in her throat as long, elegant fingers pushed back the tangle of hair and made way for two lucid blue eyes.  

This was not Jace Herondale. This, Dru realized with a sharp pang in her chest, was Kit.

“What,” her voice pitched, “the hell are you doing here?”

The shock made her words sharp and shrill. She blushed with sudden guilt, and it was a moment until she remembered she was more than entitled to be upset to see Kit Herondale.

Dru wasn’t supposed to be so surprised to see him. Jem, Tessa, and their cute little peanut, Mina, were already there, but when they said Kit would probably be joining them later, Dru assumed it was just an excuse for Kit to bail on them. Again. She was angry with him, for leaving them, for lying to her. And above all, for leaving Ty.

She cleared her throat and sharpened her gaze on his eye, but the look she found in them silenced her. Kit looked at her like he was afraid she’ll put a blade between his teeth. He also looked like he would have let her. Maybe that look, of a convicted criminal, was what made her soften her expression… and when she did, Kit visibly relaxed, but kept his distance from her all the same.

“I was invited,” Kit said. His voice was husky, hard, but his body was all discomfort. He looked at his boots, his hands twisting down his front like a complicated pretzel.

“I didn’t want to come, I know you probably don’t want to see me,” Dru could feel the acid, eating away the iron of his voice. “But Emma threatened to shave my head while I sleep if I missed this, so… yeah. I didn’t have much choice.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Said Dru.

Kit’s brows rose alarmingly high, his body closing in on itself. Dru knew animals from years of watching her older brother bringing all sorts of creatures inside the institute, so she had seen her fair share of cornered animals. Kit looked like one, so Dru schooled her face into a soft, neutral expression.

“Listen I’m, I’m sorry about-“ He was panting, fighting so hard to get the words out. From his expression, every syllable was a knife to the chest.

Dru silently took back every bad thought she had about Kit. If even after all of this time he reacted like this to the mere sight of her, he couldn’t have been so cold and indifferent like she convinced herself he must be. She hated the times when she caught herself doing the things she criticized most in others, like twisting the truth into an opinion. Like ignoring facts, knowledge, experience, and boxing them into a mold born of hurt.

Searching Kit’s half-shut eyes, Dru let herself remember the boy who lied to her only to keep her brother’s secret safe. The boy who lied only because he had to, not because he wanted to.  

“I’m sorry I ditched you and-“, Kit’s voice was small and his face was a patchwork of pale and blotchy. Dru couldn’t take it anymore.

“It’s okay, Kit. I know why you left, it’s…” Dru swallowed hard. “I understand.”

“You do?” Kit paled. He looked honestly startled before his face settled into a frozen non-reaction.

“Yeah… I know about Livvy, and how it, umm, didn’t work out.”

Kit’s blank expression didn’t change, it was as empty as the desert’s sky. Something pulled up Dru’s stomach. She opened her mouth, but between one blink of an eye to another, Kit’s stone face washed under by a strange reservation, and he mumbled “Yeah, okay. Umm, thank you.”

He wouldn’t meet her eyes. He was scanning the institute behind them so intensely she wondered for a minute if someone was approaching, and then she realized - he must be thinking about Ty.

Kit radiated with coiled-up energy, tense and unforgiving. Dru wasn’t sure if he was afraid, expectant, or both.

“He’s not here.” She said in a small, soothing voice.

Kit stayed still, but Dru detected a slight tightness in his jaw. Was he disappointed? It must be confusing for him, being here after so long, in his hometown, in the first place he learned about being a Shadowhunter. He must be completely overwhelmed. She remembered how pained Kit seemed to be when he tried to apologize to her just a minute ago, and it was just her. He probably would’ve had a fit if it was Ty here in her place.

“He’s still at the Scholomance.” She said into the silence. “They have this super-secret, highly sensitive, just for elected few stupid mission.” Dru let out the exasperated mixture of pride and annoyance her brother’s stories usually made her feel, and although Kit has just nodded once, she was sure his lips had twitched upwards a tiny bit.

“So... a motorcycle, huh?” She smiled at him. “Very Herondale of you.”

Kit let out a full-fledged smirk at her comment, and Dru felt a familiar tap on her heart. This was the Kit she remembered, and the feeling made her push a little more. “I knew they called it Grand Theft Auto for a reason. I can’t wait to hear what else you managed to steal from the head of the New York institute.”

Her taunt was a downright success. Kit barked a laugh so genuine, Dru felt thirteen all over again. She would poke him some more if it made him this cheerful. “It’s not considered theft if it was given you freely... just don’t tell that to anyone. I don’t want people to think I lost my touch.”

Dru felt her eyes widen in surprise. “So it is Jace’s motorcycle? I knew it!”

“Yeah…” Kit rocked on his heels and glanced over at his bike lovingly. ”He gave it to me for my eighteenth birthday.”

That is one legendary gift, Dru concluded. She wouldn’t mind a cousin that gifts sexy automobiles, but the thought of Julian approving to let her near a thing like that was less likely than her becoming the youngest consul in Shadowhunters history.

“So... how did you get it here?” Dru asked. “It’s not exactly a short ride from New York or Devon.”

“Magnus,” Kit answered with a shrug. “He portaled us and then just... did that thing he does where he poofs things out of thin air, like chocolate-chip cookies or... tents. Magic is so...”

“Yeah.” Dru sighed in agreement, thinking about that caramel corn.

“So where were you?” They began to trail back towards the institute. She could feel Kit tensing up with every step. She didn’t know if it was just because it brought up memories, or if it was something else. She still debated herself whether to pry into that subject, while she pried into others.

“Umm... I just,” Kit’s fingers roamed through his long curls in a somewhat nervous gesture. “I thought I’d check out my dad’s old place. See if there was anything left.” His sky blue eyes seemed clouded with memories, and from the little she knew or remembered, they weren’t all good. “I didn’t really get a chance last time, after, umm,” Kit cleared his voice. “After he died.”

He sounded stiff, and a bit drained. She almost forgot he was an orphan, like her. Of course, she had Julian, which was an amazing brother-father, and Kit has Jem and Tessa. She didn’t know Johnny Rook at all, but from what she heard, the Carstairs were definitely an improvement.

“And did you find anything?” She asked, carefully.

Kit took a long moment to answer her. They were already at the sanctuary’s doors when he finally answered.

“No. There was nothing left.”

*

Kit’s appearance didn’t make her want to join the herd of party planners all of a sudden, and by the looks of him, Kit wasn’t up to a large reunion yet. So she offered him to go practice in the training room and was pleasantly surprised when he agreed.

Kit wasn’t a regular Shadowhunter, in the way that he didn’t have to endure rigorous training for his entire life the way Dru was. So when she picked up her favorite misericord and gotten into a fighting stance, she felt rather confident that she could give Kit a run for his money, even with all of his bulging muscles and chiseled arms.

She was absolutely, painfully, wrong.

Kit might not have been raised as a Shadowhunter, but whatever it was they were feeding him in Devon, it made him a beast in a fight. Well, maybe not so savage as it sounded, but he whooped her ass in a matter of seconds, flipping her on her back without breaking a sweat.

“Damn it, Herondale.” She gasped. “Aren’t you supposed to be inexperienced? Why are you so good at this?”

Kit’s face lit up like a campfire. “Am I?”

Dru blew out a whine. “Don’t get all modest on me, you’re ruining your brand.”

There was nothing modest in the grin Kit shot her back. He flashed his teeth wide, like a Cheshire cat, and ran up to climb the training room’s pitched roof until he balanced himself lightly on the highest of the rafters. He didn’t pause to look at her and just jumped gracefully, somersaulting in the air like he was a goddamned acrobat.

Right before he straightened up, his black shirt, which had a Deadpool logo, a fact that made her enormously happy, having it being another thing that looked like the Kit she knew, rose up a little and flashed the tip of a black pattern that was inked into his lower back. Dru wondered which rune it was, and who put it on him. It was such a strange location for a rune, not somewhere you can mark yourself. It must have been Jace, but that left the question of which rune Kit needed Jace to mark him with, that he couldn’t do himself?

“Was that sufficiently Herondale?”

She stared at him, completely dumbfounded until she caught herself and shut her gaping mouth. “I’d say so… yeah. You caught in quickly, haven’t you?”

Kit brushed the dust off his gear pants and shrugged.

“Jace. That man is… relentless.” Kit flopped on one of the training mats, making a loud poof when he did. “You know, he almost threw me off a tree once, when I refused to jump? Twisted my ankle three times. He said if I won’t make it, he’d disown me. Still not sure what I was supposed to be disowned off, his rusty collection in the armoire?”

He had a British lilt to his voice. The way he pronounced certain words, round and elongated, was something he didn’t used to do back then. It was charming, Dru thought. He was charming. A bit self-conscious, still, with the way he occasionally tugged down his shirt or bite his lower lip, scrunching it to one side.

Dru always thought that if she ever met Kit again, she’d let him have a piece of her mind. But he was so… Kit. Quiet, sarcastic, familiar. The things about him that felt foreign to her weren’t really foreign, but more of an enhancement of what he used to be. There was something bright about him, almost luminous. He wasn’t particularly happy at the moment, so she couldn’t blame it on his mood. But there was something in his features… they were fine, delicate. He was all muscle, but the way his hair fell on his skin, gold on gold, felt fragile, almost monochromatic.

Kit must have sensed her staring, and his eyes narrowed at her in a silent question.

She put the misericord back on its hanging and placed her hands over her hips.

“So, wanna sneak down to the beach?”

*

The infinite stretch of water in front of her was shining bright like there was a blanket of diamonds spread all across it. The sun was low, and every ray hugged the waves with bright whispers.

They weren’t so sneaky as she hoped. Giving Kit a sideways glance, she hid a smile, remembering how Emma crushed him in a tight embrace.

“You are so big, Kit! I haven’t seen you in a year and you became Godzilla. I do not approve, Jem. He’s not allowed to be stronger than me.”

Kit choked out a bruised laugh. “You don’t have to worry about that, Em. Just… lay off with the hugging, you’ll crack a rib if you won’t let go of me.”

Mina’s answering giggle was more than enough to break the two apart. She reached her arms for Kit and he tugged her to him without a second’s hesitation.

He reminded her of Jules so much, of how he used to hold Tavvy when he was her age, nuzzling his baby hair and murmuring soft words to his ear.

There was something so vulnerable about this Kit, but when he was with his baby sister, she could see how he simply glowed. The love that he felt for that little girl was so evident, so undeniable, it made Dru’s heart play a low, painful beat.

He seemed troubled now, his brows screwed together, as he stared into the sunbathed horizon.

“How is he?”

It was almost a whisper, but Dru heard.

“Alright.” She answered. “Tall. Taller than Julian.”

Kit’s shoulders hunched inwards, and the grip on his arms was so tight, she could see his knuckles whitening.

“But, how is he? With Livvy, and,” he choked on the last word. “With everything.”

Of course he wanted to know about that. She almost forgot he knew at all. Dru was so accustomed to having to keep the slight shifts of Ty’s attention to herself, knowing he must interact with Livvy in a way that was reserved to them alone, even after death.

“He’s okay, she’s… okay.” She said. “Not that I could really say for myself. He doesn’t say much about her. He’s better now, with me.”

Dru loved her brother fiercely. All of her siblings, but Ty… Ty was something else. She didn’t love him more, but she loved him differently. In him, she could sometimes see her Livvy, and wondered whether it’s a twin thing, or was it just her presence, revealed and kept only by him. They were better, now. There were things he only said to Dru, like the story of how they found his Lynx.

“Oh, he has a cat! Well, she’s not really a cat. She’s a Carpathian lynx. Scary as hell, doesn’t like anyone other than Ty.” Dru said with her nose screwed. She liked cats and didn’t appreciate Irene’s snobby attitude, even if she gave her the creeps.

Kit muffled a laugh. “Sounds like Church. That cat gives all other cats bad reputation, devil creature.”

Dru’s hands flew to her mouth. “Church! Awww I miss that furball!”

Kit snorted. “You can have him.”

Dru let herself look at Kit’s eyes. The smirk on his lips didn’t reach them.

“And you? How are you, Kit?”

Kit seemed startled by the question. For a second, the guard he kept up slid off him, and an endless sorrow spilled away from him like ink, staining his face with shadows. It didn’t linger, but it didn’t really keep away.

“I’m okay, Drusilla.” He put a calloused hand on her arm and squeezed. “So are you, it seems. I’m happy to see you again.”

The smile Dru gave him was wide, silently trying to convey that so was she.

She patted his arm and rose to her feet, dusting sand off her black velvet overalls, which were an unfortunate choice for the beach.

“I’ll head up to see if they need some last-minute help. Can’t pull the hostess trick for much longer, I suppose.”

Kit only nodded and fixed his gaze back onto the sinking sun.

*

When Dru was halfway to the institute’s doors, she noticed a tall, dark figure headed her way. Her breath caught in her chest, and she ran towards him, blessing the sand for muffling the sound of her feet.

It wasn’t long until she reached him, her eyes tingling with excitement and apprehension. Ty reached for her shoulder, grabbing hard. He didn’t even look at her, her face set ahead, on the black and gold figure sitting a breath from the water.

“Ty! When did you get here? I thought you weren’t coming, Jules and Em almost called this thing off!” She was jabbering, she knew it, but she wanted to distract Ty so she could wage his mood, see if he could handle Kit’s presence.

“The mission was over,” Ty answered. “I texted Julian a few hours ago. When did he get here?”

Dru stared at her brother until she realized he was talking about Kit.  “Oh! Umm, a few hours ago? We trained together a bit and then we just… hung out here. I was just heading back, do you…” she hesitated, “do you wanna come with me?”

Ty averted his gaze to his left hand, which was when Dru noticed the agitated movement.

“No.” He said. “Did he, umm,” Dru wasn’t used to seeing her brother so hesitant, one of his hands fluttering, one clutching her shoulder in an iron grip. “How is he?”

His tone, his words, the exact mirror to what Kit had asked her moments ago. Ty didn’t try to mask his feelings, Dru guessed he wasn’t aware enough of her presence to try.

So she weighed her words carefully, before answering. “Sad. I think he’s sad.”

Ty’s breath hitched, and for a moment, she thought it was a reaction to her words. But when she looked into his stormy eyes, she saw that he was looking down at the waters again. At Kit.

Dru turned to see Kit has risen to his feet. He was chucking his jacket away, unbuckling his pants. She’d never seen him swim when he was staying with them, but the salty smell of the ocean and the light breeze was intoxicating enough for her to understand the urge to plunge inside the ocean.

Kit reached for the hem of his shirt and started to lift his shirt up. Dru tensed, suddenly remembering the rune she glimpsed back at the training room. She straightened her back, readying her eyes to catch the mark from the large distance. But when Kit’s shirt rose up over his neck and his fair hair slid sideways, she could hear the air escaping her lungs, echoed in the stunned gasp that came from Ty’s direction.

Kit’s entire back was inked with an intricate pattern, looping from the nape of his neck, down his shoulder blades, and all the way to his lower back. A beautiful arrangement of vines, tracing the dips and ridges of his muscled back, the black, thin shapes draping his skin like skeleton feathers. It wasn’t a rune at all, it was a tattoo.

“Thorns.” She whispered, disbelief marking every syllable.

“Blackthorns.”

She turned back to look at her older brother and was startled to find a fierce smile blazing through his lips.

His hand left her shoulder, and he was walking slowly towards Kit, who had already lost his gear pants and was paddling through shallow waters.

Dru just stood there, her thoughts an incoherent tangle inside her head. She watched Ty making his way towards Kit, and found that her heart understood before her mind did. It was unexpected, to say the least, but it also wasn’t.

Memories washed over Dru as she watched Ty closing the distance between them, three years worth of distance, and felt the past washing over her at once. It was the way it was always supposed to be, the two of them together.

With one last glance towards the strange painting of past and future, Dru turned her back to the sunset and headed back home.

[moskaisley]

migraine pt. 4 | tension

gif cred: @thestarwarsdaily​

rating: mature

word count: 5.7k HOO BOY

warnings: ANGST ANGST ANGST EVERYONE IS ANGY, cursing, descriptions of vomiting and a panic attack, mentions of death, mentions of trafficking 

a/n: I KNO THIS TOOK A LONG TIME .. AND I'VE BEEN STARING AT IT FOR HOURS. THANK U ALL FOR BEING SO SO SO PATIENT AND THANK U TO ALL THE PEOPLE WHO LEFT LOVELY COMMENTS ON BOTH TUMBLR N AO3 <3

I really really appreciate you guys. As someone who doesn't consider herself a writer by any means, it's nice to know that people enjoy the stories I tell. I had a LOT of trouble with this, but the rest of the story is planned out so I'm hoping there won't be as long a break in between chapters again! we've got about 3 parts left :)) 

summary:

"Maybe you don’t hate him as much as he thinks.

Maybe you miss him as much as he misses you. Maybe you also long for him in the late hours of the night, replaying moments of your lives together over and over and over in your head. Maybe you didn’t regret taking this job. Maybe, just maybe, you will forgive this broken man and let him in your heart’s home once again."

Wherein wounds are reopened, split, and burned alive.

parts 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6

ao3 link / masterlist

Detective Ira Volskaya was a shady guy. Incidentally, he was also your client. 

He couldn’t have been much older than you were, but years of police work and crime stopping have weathered him into a brooding, suspicious man with greying hairs and droopy, tired eyes. You and Mando ended up far away from the city center of Coruscant, Volskaya insisting that collection took place in an abandoned warehouse. Judging by how secretive this all was and how strict the detective was on his instructions, you figured that this little exchange wasn’t “in line” with Security Force policy. 

As Mando spoke with Volskaya, you helped unload Khan’s slab onto the docking station for his men to take away. Once they had it down the ramp, you walked over to them, catching his attention.

Taking a puff of his cigarra, he narrows his eyes and nods at you, “She wasn’t with you last time.”

“She’s just–” 

Mando’s head darted between the two of you, hesitating. 

“A coworker,” you cut in sharply. 

The detective pursed his lips in suspicion, but left it alone. Instead, he turned to the briefcase at his feet, handing it over to Mando. As he double checked the amount in the case, your eyes caught Ira’s men loading the carbonite slab onto a speeder. Your mind drifts back to something Mando said on the Slipstream.

“he’s wanted for running multiple sex trafficking rings throughout the galaxy…”

You look back at the detective, “What’s going to happen to the rest of Khan’s operation?”

“We’re hoping that his capture will cause a fracture in his little empire. Break up the chain of command and let it die out.”

Volskaya takes another drag and sighs, smoke curling off his lips, “But with the new intel that’s come in, there’s a chance it’ll create a power vacuum. A lot of people wanted him dead. Someone new could easily take his place.”

Your stomach twists as you remember Aayn’vida trembling on the bathroom floor. There are probably still thousands of girls like her, just as scared and helpless. It makes your mouth go sour. 

As if sensing your discomfort, Mando shuts the case abruptly.

“It’s all here. Let’s go.”

You kept repeating to yourself that nothing would satisfy you more than to get off this planet and move on from anything that had to do with Khan Horne. But there was a scathing pull at the back of your mind that tugged with each step closer to the Crest. Your gaze darted between the case in Mando’s hand, the slab on the speeder, and Ira Volskaya’s retreating figure. Furrowing your brows, you rub your fingers on your temple; collecting never felt this complicated. What’s gotten into you? You got your money and the job is done, so why was your brain screaming at you to stop Mando from closing the ramp?

Someone new… a power vacuum. 

“Wait.”

Mando’s gaze turned to you, fingers hovering over his vambrace.

Fumbling over your words, you say something along the lines of stay put and that you’ll be back in a second. Turning back to the warehouse, you jog away from the ship and call,

“Detective!”

He spins on his heel back to you, face twisting in confusion.

Squaring your shoulders and huffing your breath, you say, “Give me a list of everyone who was involved in Khan’s organization.”

He eyes you quizzically, “I thought bounty hunters didn’t ask questions.”

“I’m not asking as a bounty hunter.”

“Then what are you asking as?”

“Someone who can get to them faster than the Security Force can,” You swallow hard, courage pulsing through you, “Someone who can help.”

The detective raises his eyebrows at you, impressed. And then he smiles, throwing his cigarra to the ground and stomping out the ashes beneath his foot. 

--

Din Djarin was not good enough for you. He didn’t deserve you. This much he knew.

So he let you go.

He really thought he did the right thing. It escalated too quickly after the cockpit and he found himself falling hard. What started as relief for sexual tension turned into softer touches, shining smiles, flirtatious jokes that drove him over the edge.  

And then,

“Do you ever think there’s more to this?”

He digs his nose into the crook of your neck, arm slung over your bare waist. Half-asleep, dizzy from your warmth, he relishes in the feeling of your body next to his. 

“More to what?”

You let out a gentle sigh, “This life. Hunting. Living out of a tiny, broken ship hopping from planet to planet.”

“Hey, the Crest isn’t that bad.”

You slap him lightly against his chest, “You know what I mean.” 

“What did you have in mind?”

A cottage. The ocean. Family.

All in the afterglow of a kiss that tasted like peaches. 

Din had a feeling you’ve always wanted more, but this was truly the first time you spoke honestly and truly in length about it. Bounty hunting was rarely ever a sought after profession, and though you were good at your job, he knew it wasn’t something you ever planned on continuing. Twisting a peach pit in your fingers, you admit to him that your life would’ve been completely different without it. You would’ve taken over your father’s orchards and lived in your beautiful family villa, selling fresh fruit to nobles and townspeople alike. Your voice grows wistful as you recount sweet summer days spent chasing your older brother through the fields or weaving baskets with your mother. 

“I wore sundresses, Din.” 

He smiles against the soft skin of your neck and squeezes your thigh gently, “Sounds pretty. You should wear them again.”

“You’d like that wouldn’t you?”

“Very much so, yes.”

You let out a giggle, shoving him gently. He only held you tighter. A beat of silence passed between you before Din’s hand moved to interlace with yours, face suddenly contorting with unease. 

“What happened?”

“What always happens.” Your shoulders rise and fall with a heavy sigh, and you grip his fingers tighter. “I was seventeen when Imps occupied our valley. They wanted to clear the farm for military barracks; when my father refused, they burned everything to the ground in the middle of the night. My brother and I escaped with a few other refugees.”

“And your parents?”

“Firing squad.”

“What about our brother?”

He feels your nails dig further into the crevice of his hand.

“He was stupid enough to join the Resistance. I don’t know where he is, but I’ve assumed the worst already.”

His heart twists in remorse at the hurt in your voice. Removing his hands away from yours, he pulls you in closer, stroking your hair with his calloused fingers and pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead. In all your years of partnership, Din had never known the full extent of your past, only that you started young doing hits for spice cartels and eventually ending up in the Guild. Before, when he tried to ask why you started so early, your answer was always brief and bitter.

“There was only so much a girl could do to make money, Mando.” 

The conversation never went further than that. But now, in light of your vulnerability and candor, your questions about the future suddenly made sense. It was never supposed to be this way; your life since adolescence had been solely dictated by fear and the need to survive. When you spoke about it, you sounded exhausted. With the decline of the Empire, how could he blame you for wanting to be more than a war-torn orphan turned ruthless hunter?

The more he thought about it the more it tore him apart. 

Because suddenly he was 11 years old again, watching the carnage of his hometown disappear over the shoulder of a Death Watch soldier. Jarring visions of blood and empty eyes melted in between with hazy memories of happy trips to the market and bedtime stories. It felt like whiplash. The echoes of blaster fire and falling debris were loud enough for him to wake up shaking in a cold sweat. The pounding of his heart sounded a lot like cannon fodder and it was loud enough to give him the headaches you suffered from so often. He was ashamed to say that the only time he really remembered his mother’s face was when she was dead on the ground. But to his horror, in his nightmares, he began to see you instead of her, body lifeless and eyes devoid of any life. Everything he’d been ignoring since his youth, crushed and hidden after swearing the Creed and following the Way of the Mandalore, was suddenly washing over him like ocean waves in a storm. Because, unlike you, this life was so devastatingly simple and comfortable for him. It was almost sacred; he was bound by a near holy doctrine and devoid of emotional attachments. That is, until you came and found home under his skin. He was grieving for you before he even lost you. It was unbearable, filling his lungs and suffocating him until he was gasping for air–

“Are you okay?”  Your drowsy voice whispered beneath him. 

He swallowed hard and pulled you closer, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead.

“Go back to sleep, sweet girl.”

Any semblance of a normal life was lost on him. Din knew he couldn’t give you peace he didn’t have. He wanted to, though.

He wished he could gift you every star that shone in the sky. 

Fuck 80%. He’d give you galaxies.

And yet, he still pulled a blaster on you and left you alone – too caught up in not facing his own demons. Din didn’t realize how much of a mistake it was to let you go until he was half-dead, bleeding all over your old bunk. A job went terribly wrong that day.  He was ambushed on some godforsaken jungle planet and running on two hours of sleep, dreams plagued with visions of you crying at the foot of the Slipstream. He was so used to having someone cover his blindspots that he made a colossal mistake that nearly cost him his life. No one had his back that day, and was there no one to stitch him up and call him an idiot. 

Existing without you was rougher than he thought it’d be since you’d seeped into every corner of his little life. He couldn’t pass a fruit stand without glancing over for your favorite peaches. When he’d wrangle with tougher bounties, he cursed at how much easier this shit would be if you were there. In the Razor Crest, you’d organized the kitchenette a certain way that Din couldn’t find a pot without tearing it apart, and then he’d wrack his brain to figure out how you organized it so neatly in the first place. He felt a chill when he passed your empty bunk. One day, he found a bottle of your headache medicine in the refresher cabinet. Din kept it. Just in case.

You were everywhere and yet, you weren’t. 

You ran together for so long that others noticed your disappearance. Even Xi’an. 

“Where’s your little puppy, Mando? She lost?”

He said nothing. 

The Twi’lek moved closer, running a hand up his chestplate, “Or did you leave her behind, too?”

“Don’t,” he seethed. The victory in her eyes was disgusting.

Mayfeld’s teasing voice cut in, “Competition, Xi’an?”

“Hardly,” She gave him a vile smirk, “Did she whine like a bitch when it finally happened?” Din was quick to seize her hand away from his body, twisting her forearm near the point of breaking. 

“I said. Don’t.”

She only laughed. He wished you were there to wipe that smirk off her face.

It was then that he decided to come and find you. As it turns out, bounty hunters don’t make great parents. The child had just barely survived again, and Din was getting desperate. He’d already lost track of how many times the baby was put in danger, and though he’d been able to keep him alive all these months, Din was definitely not a parent. 

After picking up the most lucrative, non-Guild job he could get, he flew straight to the one person he could truly trust in the universe.

When he saw you tensely poised at the cantina, ten paces felt like ten parsecs.

The first thing he noticed were the strands of grey peeking through your hair and the dark circles beneath your eyes. You were by no means an old woman, but you weren’t getting any younger either. In the state that he left you in, three years had aged you and your fiery spirit. Your once lively, spitfire demeanor was now cold and tired. 

In the beginning of this little reunion, Din was half convinced that he’d made a terrible mistake trying to make amends. He was desperate to be in your good graces. He needed to apologize. beg you. Grovel at your feet. Atone. Do penance. But you’d seem to shut down every time he tried, denying his pitiful apologies and forgoing any pleasantries. The Mandalorian was lost around you.

And then you got shot. 

At that point, Din was positive you were marching straight out of his ship and jetting away in the Slipstream the second this was all over – not before kicking his ass, of course. All the guilt that had consumed him over the years nearly drew him to insanity as he took your limp body from Aayn’vida’s arms, cursing in Mando’a and imploring you to stay awake. Wiping the tears from your eyes and tending to your wound, his thoughts were hysterical. How could he do this to you? Put you through all this trouble only to get shot? And for what? A chance to –

“Din?”

The name fell so softly from your lips. 

“Din, my head– it hurts so much.”

His mouth goes dry. He lets out a shaky breath, overwhelmed and eyes bleary.

“Sssh, lay down. You’ll be okay, cyar’ika.”

The Mandalorian only ever dreamed about you saying his name again. Upon your reunion, he noticed immediately how unnatural “Mando” sounded in your mouth, even if he’s heard it thousands of times. It stung when you refused to call him anything else. So hearing it whispered in the walls of the Razor Crest again made his heart beat violently in his chest and gave him the smallest sliver of hope.

Maybe you don’t hate him as much as he thinks.

Maybe you miss him as much as he misses you. Maybe you also long for him in the late hours of the night, replaying moments of your lives together over and over and over in your head. Maybe you didn’t regret taking this job. Maybe, just maybe, you will forgive this broken man and let him in your heart’s home once again.

--

“I saw Xi’an again.”

Initiating small talk felt physically painful, but he tried anyway.  After Jaemai, you seemed to be a little more comfortable speaking freely with him. If you were still angry, you kept it hidden well. Besides, it was hard to be upset with a cute baby on board.

“Really?” You responded with casual interest, attention mostly focused on the child in front of you while Din piloted the ship. 

“Yup,” he said, “She… uh...betrayed me and tried to kill the kid.”

“Sounds like her. Where is she now?”

“Prison.”

He doesn’t miss the cheeky grin that spreads across your lips. You softly chuckle and take the baby in your arms, cooing to him, “Good riddance, huh? That scary blue lady is gone for good, yeah?”

The kid gurgles in delight when he’s lifted up. Mando watches you lovingly play with the child, as if it were the most natural thing in the world.  He doesn’t remember you being so good with kids, but then again, that was a rare opportunity in itself. The thought of you with kids of your own makes his cheeks flush with warmth.

“Where did you even find him?” You ask, bouncing him up and down in his crib.

“Arvala 7. He was the asset.”

You look at him now, puzzled, “The asset? He’s a child!”

“He’s wanted by Imps.”

“Huh.” You hold the child closer to you now, rocking him in your arms. “And you saved him.”

He hummed in confirmation. A beat of silence passes by. 

Mando notes the way the kid stares at you with warm, loving eyes, “He likes you.”

“Yeah?” You look back to the green baby raising him high in the air. His excited laughter is sweet in your ears and you giggle with him.

“Mando’s probably a mess when it comes to you. Probably forgets to feed you, doesn’t he?”

He rolls his eyes, but he’s heart flutters all the same. 

Lowering the child back into his pod, the child fusses as you try to get him to settle down. You took the silver ball that was laying in his blanket and placed it in his hands to divert his attention. Din faces back towards the console while you sink into the co-pilot’s seat. Your old seat.

From the corner of his eye, he sees you pulling a data pad from your pack on the floor and plugging in a storage drive. You scroll through droves of information silently while Din keeps his gaze trained on the passing lights of hyperspace. But his curiosity only grew, and he was tired of straining his eyes to slyly look at whatever you were reading. 

“What are you looking at?”

Your eyes don’t meet his, instead continuing to scan over the information before you.  “It’s all the people who kept Khan’s ring running.”

“You got this from the detective?”

You nod. 

“Why?”

A long sigh escapes you as you power down the datapad and slip it away.

“I guess you can say I’m retiring.” 

Din’s body is quick to turn to you, “What do you mean?”

“You heard Volskaya, someone is just gonna take his place. There are still plenty of people like Aayn’vida. People who need help.”

Beneath his helm, his face twists in reluctance. He asks, “And you’re gonna do it alone?”

You furrow your brows at him, as if the answer was obvious. “Looks like it.”

Din straightens up in his seat, stomach turning uneasily. The air in the cockpit was suddenly suffocating, and he sensed your growing ire as you pressed your lips together.

“What?”

“I didn’t say anything.”

You roll your eyes.

“You’re doing that thing again.”

“What thing?”

“Your judgy thing!” 

You point an accusing finger at his form, “The one you do with your face and your shoulders.”

“You can’t even see my face.”

“Mando.”

“Alright! It’s just–” he grits, struggling to find the words, “It seems...dangerous.”

“You say that like it makes a difference,” your voice cuts in, sharp like a blade, “do you not think I’m capable on my own?”

“What? No, I–” 

Kriff, why is it so hard to talk to you? Din lets out a huff, scolding himself to get it together.

“Listen, we both know you’re more than capable of handling yourself. But this? This is big shit. Not some bail-skipper or petty thief. You go after them and they’ll be on you for the rest of your life.”

“What life, Mando?” you snapped, “When I was her age, I could’ve easily been one of those girls. Bounty hunting wasn’t a life, it was survival. This is something that’s important.”

“Y/N, you’re gonna get yourself killed.”

“Why does that suddenly matter to you?”

You both wince at the sharpness of your words and you turn away from him, suddenly embarrassed of your own outburst. Harsh silence blankets you both as you keep your gazes trained forward. The tension in the air is heavy and thick. 

Your tight voice cuts through the quiet with a single question.

“Why did you bring me here?”

He feels like he’s gonna be sick. 

“I–”

A giant crash abruptly resounds through the cockpit, causing the three of you to jerk forward. Alarms uproar through the ship as the two of you scramble into position at the console. Your fingers find the buttons easily, pulling up the radar and scanning the area for the threat.

A comm chimes in, “Give us the child, Mandalorian! It’s no use trying to run.”

“It’s a gunship, coming in from behind us,” you quickly inform, “Shit! The shields are weak, we need to get out of here now.” 

He nods in agreement, gripping the controls again and lurching the ship forward and speeding off. Your attackers follow in hot pursuit, blasting your ship again. A hit lands, shaking the Crest violently again, earning a strangled cry from behind you.

“Y/N! The baby!” Din grunts, veering the ship back on course.

“Right!” 

You nearly leap from your seat, securing and shushing the panicked child as you close his pram to keep him from falling amidst the chaos. Coming back to the co-pilot’s seat, you curse as you read through the multiple alarms flashing across the ship’s interface.

“Our shields are down, Mando. We need to end this.”

He curses under his breath, weighing their options. They didn’t have enough fuel for a hyperspace jump, nor the time to make any proper calculations. His gaze darts to the green planet approaching up ahead and bites the inside of his cheek. A crash isn’t ideal, but it solves the issue of being stranded in dead space. Another jolt and crash rock the ship forward. 

“Strap in,” He barks at you, “We’re shooting our way out and going for an emergency landing.” You nod, securing yourself in your seat and preparing yourself for battle.

--

“It isn’t the worst planet to get stuck on.”

“Doesn’t change the fact that we’re stuck.”

The two of you stood at the foot of the Razor Crest which was currently smoking and leaking fuel into the forest floor. Though you’d survived the gunfight above, the ship had taken serious damage. The shield generators were nearly destroyed and the repulsor grilles were shot, making it impossible to fly the Crest without spinning off course. Normally, with the help of a mechanic, the job could be done within a matter of days, but you were both stuck in a thick forest with the next town over being at least a day’s walk. Repairs could take at least a week with the spare parts that were already kept in the ship, and travelling into town could easily make it two, assuming they’d even have what you need. This posed 2 issues:

Every day you stayed idle, the higher the risk of another hunter (or worse, an Imperial) turning up and kidnapping the child.

Din had yet to feel the wrath that had been building up inside you for the past three years. If the hunters didn’t shoot him, you definitely would, and you wouldn’t miss.

He takes his gaze off the ship and observes your surroundings. All things considered, it was a pretty nice place. The forest was lush, rife with tall trees and bright flora. The air was fresh and cool, and the whistles of birds carried through the treetops. He was somewhat grateful; you could have easily been stuck in a scorching desert or some awful jungle. Past the clearing–which had inadvertently been made by the ship crash– there was a lake, crystal clear and stretching for miles. If the circumstances were any different, maybe you would have enjoyed yourselves, stopped and admired the scenery together.

But they weren’t.

The fact of the matter is that there’s something acrid that permeated the air between you. Sometimes, he could catch it in the way you looked at him, how your eyes flared with sharp, visceral rage and piercing through his beskar like a hot blade. He saw it in the cantina at your reunion, and he felt it twist his heart during your last exchange before you landed. 

“Why does it suddenly matter to you?”

Discussing the rift between you wasn’t a conversation he was eager to have. The attack on the Crest only delayed the inevitable, and now, shipwrecked on an unknown planet, he waited anxiously for the years to catch up on him. Your irritation with him didn’t die when you’d landed; it might’ve actually gotten worse. Every furrow of your brows, every curse under your breath only reminded Din of how much you were dying to say, and it only amplified his dread. But being the practical person you were, you remained focused on survival first, setting up camp and laying out a plan for repairs in the morning.  Going into town would have to wait, as you weren’t sure what state the ship would be in after its initial mending. You stayed silent in the hours you both tended to your respective duties and it wasn’t until the late afternoon that he felt your presence once again.

He was in the middle of counting ration packs when you said, “We need firewood. It might be cold tonight.”

Din nodded, but as he watched you begin to walk away into the woods, he couldn’t help but spill the words bubbling in his throat. 

“About what I said earlier. I didn’t mean to offend you,” he stood to his full height, “You’re–you’re right. It’s not my business anymore.”

You didn’t respond to him for a moment; your expression, frozen and unreadable. Your gaze tears away from him to look down at the toes of your shoes, and he hears you let out a dejected, breathy laugh as you shook your head. 

“You know what I don’t get?” You ask, cynicism dripping from your lips, “You never answered my question on the ship.”

Din clenches his fists, nausea suddenly returning to him.

“Khan wasn’t a hard job. You could’ve easily caught him without me, so why? Why did you bring me? Why did you find me?”

“I couldn’t go into the terminal without attracting attention.”

“No, but you could’ve waited for him to move. Tracked him somewhere else,” your tone grows more clipped by the second, “I know you. You’re the best in the parsec and you would’ve found him. I might’ve gotten shot, but there were way harder quarries than him.”

When he still doesn’t answer, you march forward, fuming with indignation.

“For once, can you just tell me the truth?”

Din’s heart was nearly bursting out of his chest, anxiety rippling through him as he confessed.

“I need help,” he croaks, nearly cringing at the weakness and desperation in his tone, “with him.”

He beckons over to the child, carelessly toddling along the floor. Din watches your expression soften with pity as you watch him play.  

“I don’t...I don’t know what I’m doing,” He continues, “I’m so confused and–and lost. I worry about him all the time. He’s always in danger. I’ve tried to give him a home, somewhere safe. But the Empire won’t stop until they find him.”

“Why me?”

“Because you’re the only one I trust in this universe.”

Din waits for your answer with bated breath, drinking in every reaction. You looked pained, fingers finding their way to the bridge of your nose, pressing hard and you squeeze your eyes shut. 

“And I’m supposed to trust you in return?”

Once again, he doesn’t respond, fearing that he’d only make the situation worse.

“You know I can’t do this.”

You cross your arms, hugging your body as you turn away from the kid to face him. He feels his heart sink, distress clawing away at him. I need you; I can’t lose you again. I miss you, I miss you, I miss you.

“Could you at least think about it?”

“I can’t,” you say sternly, “I’m sorry about the kid, but I know you can figure something out. I’m not the right person, and you need to find someone else.”

You are. More than right. More than I deserve.

“I don’t know who else I can turn to.”

“Mando, you don’t understand,” your voice turns angry once again, “I can’t live everyday not knowing if you’re gonna stick around or not.”

“Things are different, Y/N. I’m not going to leave.”

“Why? Because you have a baby to take care of, you’re suddenly willing to stick around?  What happens if things get serious? What is keeping you from walking out tomorrow? A few weeks from now? Are you gonna leave me without a ship this time? Shoot me if I don’t cooperate?”

Stop stop stop stop. He raises his voice, not in ire but in desperation, “This isn’t about us, this is about him!”

“It’s always going to be about us!” Din is stunned to silence as your eyes turn glossy and red with tears, “And after everything, I–I can’t trust you.  I mean–kriff– you left me in the worst way possible. You only offered me a job because you knew I wouldn’t have listened to you in the first place, didn’t you?”

His shoulders go rigid, head dipping in shame.

You scoff, sucking in a deep, shaky breath before you go on, “We can’t act like nothing ever happened and just push it aside for the kid; it’s always going to be there. Every time we speak, every time I look at you I–”

You cut yourself off, hesitating to finish your thought. Running your fingers through your hair, you tug at it at it as you let out yet another frustrated huff, “I spent three years of my miserable life trying to figure out what I did wrong. If you can tell me right now what was going through your head that day, then maybe I’ll consider staying. But if you can’t, you need to find someone else.”

The words are there, but get caught in his throat. He’s terrified; speaking them aloud might just rip him in half, but if he doesn’t, he loses you a second time. But they don’t come; they linger and fester and rot on his tongue, and he can only clench his fists harder at his own cowardice.

The way you look at him is soul crushing. 

“I thought so.”

You pick up your pack and sling it over your shoulders, skulking into the woods without another word.

--

You didn’t come back for hours. Night fell across the forest as Din paced outside the Razor Crest, playing out your conversation in his head over and over again until it made him dizzy. His gut was filled with dread as each minute passed by, and he couldn’t figure out if he wanted you to come back at all. It wasn’t until he heard a soft whine from the floating pram that he realized that so much time had passed. Din nearly forgot to feed the child his own hysteria.

“Hey, little womp rat,” he sighed, gently picking him up, “She’s right, huh? I really am a mess.”

The baby’s big glossy eyes stare up at him as if sensing Din’s unease. His tiny hands grab at the thick cloak around his neck, pulling himself upwards and nuzzling his face in between his neck and his pauldron. Is he… comforting me?

Something forms at the base of his throat as he croaks a gentle, “Thanks, kid.”

But this quiet moment of peace is interrupted at the cracking sound of a stick. He stills, listening further as footsteps grow louder and louder. His blaster is out and aimed behind him before he can even think to look. He whips around, clutching the baby closer to him only to see you abruptly dropping the chopped wood in your hands to the floor. The baby begins to cry at the sudden shift in movement.

He relaxes, letting his arm fall to his side but not holstering his blaster. Instead, he gently bounces the child in his other arm in an attempt to soothe him.

“It’s okay. It’s just Y/N,” he says softly. When Din looks back to you, you’re still frozen on the spot. His brows furrow beneath his helmet.

“Y/N? What’s wrong?”

You stutter, “Can you put that fucking thing away, please?”

He looks at the child, and back to you. A flare of irritation ignites in his chest.

“What the hell are you talking about?”

“Every time you point you point it at me, I expect you to pull the trigger.”

Oh. Shit.

Guilt pierces through his chest. He quickly slips it back into his holster

“I’m sorry I didn’t know it was you,” he apologizes. You’re still unmoving, looking at him as if he’d just burned you.

“Y/N, you know I would never–“

“But you were going to.”

“Not even then.”

As Din begins to walk forward, he notices the way your body shakes violently. His hand gingerly goes to rest against your arm to comfort you, but you tear yourself away from him, wrapping inward as you seethe.

“Don’t. Touch. Me.”

The look in your eyes makes Din’s blood run cold. Your pointed stare was piercing and hot and raw. It seared and flared with white hot wrath. Your breathing was ragged, chest heaving up and gasping for air. There it is.

The visceral rage and contempt you held for him had finally surfaced. It festered and boiled over, consuming you to the point where Din thought you would’ve killed him on the spot. But then, revulsion contorts your face, and you quickly shove past him, leaving him paralyzed in your wake. You disappear behind the Crest, and he hears you dropping to the ground.

He winces at the sound of you heaving the contents of your stomach into the lake. 

Din sets the baby down into his carrier, and quickly rounds the corner of the ship to see you on your hands and knees at the edge of the water. 

He’s speechless. The only words he could manage sounded disgustingly miserable from his vocoder.

“I’m so sorry.”

You sniffle as you drag yourself up from the ground. You don’t turn around to face him. 

“You don’t have to tell me why you left. Even if I deserve an explanation,” you say, voice strained and pathetic.

“Because when this is all over, I don’t ever want to see you again. Keep your money and your jobs. I don’t care if it pays enough for ten lifetimes. If you ever try to find me, I won’t hesitate to kill you.”

-

taglist:

@bella-ciaao , @tiffdawg thanx loves <3

[honeypiehotchner]

Beautiful Stranger (Chris Evans x OFC) -- part fifteen

Hello again! This quarantine business on top of online classes has been a rough ride so far. I hope you all are well and safe! Stay inside and wash ya hands! (And enjoy this cutesy lil chapter)

Warnings: none! Except for a tiny mention of her anxiety and nightmares. Otherwise it is all fluff people xx. 

Look at his face he’s so sweet :(

The ride to my hometown is as promised. About thirty minutes outside the city, but far enough out that the skyscrapers and crowds are foreign.

I opted to drive since I know the roads, but Chris was reluctant to put Dodger in my car -- even though I told him I didn’t mind at all. So, Dodger sits in Chris’s lap in the passenger seat while I drive.

I get on the interstate first for just a few minutes, and then it’s winding back roads until we reach the park.

“Okay,” I reach up to turn down the radio. “That’s my high school,” I point out the window. “And junior high, and elementary,” I chuckle. “All clumped together.”

“Wait, really?” Chris asks, turning around in his seat as we drive by.

“We’ll pass it on the way out,” I assure him. “The dog park is up here.”

“It’s all so small,” Chris laughs.

“A lot different from Boston, huh?”

“A little, yeah,” he admits with a smile. “You haven’t been, have you?”

“Nope,” I shake my head. “But I know it’s a big city.”

“Well, yeah,” he laughs, scratching Dodger’s head. “But there’s suburbs and stuff.”

“And stuff,” I mimic his tone. “I never would’ve guessed.”

I’m looking away because I’m being a responsible driver, keeping my eyes on the road, but I can feel his eyes still on me. Once I find a moment, I glance back over at him, and I’m not sure what to make of the look he’s giving me. It looks a little like he wants to tackle me.

And I’m not entirely sure I’d be opposed to the idea.

“Here we are,” I announce as I pull into the parking lot, deciding to change the subject instead of even daring to venture down the road of asking him what that look was for.

There’s a few people out with their dogs, but mostly older couples, so by the looks of it, we’re safe.

Chris is still wearing his sunglasses and baseball cap, though. I’m not complaining. It’s not a bad look. I just miss his blue eyes.

But that’s for another day.

The second Chris opens the door, Dodger is rushing out and tugging on the leash. I point toward the gate and it takes no time for Chris to open it, letting Dodger inside before unhooking his leash.

Dodger is off in a flash, running and jumping all over the grass. There aren’t many dogs here for him to make friends with, but there are a couple, and that seems to be enough.

Chris grabs my hand and laces our fingers together, and I can’t hide my look of shock. We don’t show much PDA, aside from the very occasional handhold (which isn’t normally with our fingers intertwined like this) or him opening doors for me, but we also don’t go out in public at all for PDA to be a conversation. A brief moment walking from the door to my car is one thing, and lasts a few seconds, but this is different.

The dog area isn’t crowded, but the park itself is, and it isn’t far away. Children and their parents are running all around. Probably hundreds of phones in pockets, some already out to document their kids’ fun. They could so easily turn their lens on us.

But still, Chris squeezes my hand and tugs me over to a bench. We sit and watch Dodger roll in the grass, clearly excited to be outside of the city. Chris pulls my hand with his to rest on his leg, but not before pressing a kiss to my knuckles.

I’m going to melt if he keeps doing this.

Little touches like this when we’re just in his apartment, on his couch, are one thing. But being in public, in a dog park, where other couples are sitting just like us, letting their dogs run around. This is another thing, another feeling entirely.

It gives me this strange feeling of normalcy. I’ve never been in a relationship to even know what makes one normal, but I’ve seen Camile and Jack. They do things like this. They’ve done a lot of things that Chris and I have to either substitute with an indoor activity, or be extremely careful doing -- which in turn just almost ruins it entirely.

But this. This is normal.

I lean my head onto his shoulder out of habit, and he leans his back on mine, making me smile. My eyes glance around the park, a nervous habit I’ve developed more for his sake than mine, but no cameras are in sight. The older couple smiles at us, but that is all.

No screaming fans, no pushing or shoving me out of the way to reach him, no blinding camera flashes.

Just the sound of children laughing, of birds singing in the trees, and of Dodger rolling around in the grass. The feel of Chris’s hand in mine, his head leaned against mine, our bodies right next to each other. Right where we’re supposed to be.

It’s not at all like the nightmares I’ve had. I hate to even admit that I’ve had them, but I have. Violent flashes of being ripped away from him in a crowd, of him growing angry with me for not knowing how to handle the situation.

“What are you thinking about?”

His question sounds so laced with concern that my immediate reaction is to be defensive of my thoughts. “Nothing. Why?”

He lifts his head off of mine, prompting me to meet his gaze. It’s harder anyway when he has sunglasses on, but somehow I can tell he’s looking at me. “I heard you take a deep breath.”

“Ah,” I chuckle. “Sorry. Anxiety.”

“Anxiety?” One mention of the word and he’s taking his sunglasses off, like he knows I’ll be just a little better if I can see the blue of his eyes -- and it’s true. “What’s wrong?”

I shake my head. “It’s silly.”

“It’s not silly,” he replies firmly, but not scolding. Now that he’s taken his sunglasses off, I really can see the concern in his eyes that I heard in his voice. “What’s the matter?”

I squeeze his hand. “Just thinking about this. Us.”

That answer doesn’t bring him any relief, though. “Is everything okay?”

“Oh. Oh! Yes, we’re okay, that’s not what I meant,” I laugh again, this time covering my eyes with my free hand. “Sorry, I’m making a mess of such a small thing.”

“You’re not making a mess,” he assures me in a quieter tone.

“I was just thinking about you holding my hand,” I finally get out. 

“I like holding your hand,” he says cheekily, with a grin for added effect. 

“I know, I like holding your hand, too,” I smile, and I would be rolling my eyes if he wasn’t as sweet as he is. “But this is new. I mean, yeah, you’ve gone to lunch with me and all, but this is the first time we’ve been...out like this. Together.”

He squeezes my hand again and presses another kiss to my knuckles. “I was thinking about that too.”

“No you weren’t,” I gasp in disbelief. “Really?”

He nods. “I was. But this is a perfect first outing, isn’t it? I mean, getting to see your hometown and let Dodge run around.”

“Really?”

“Really,” he replies, and I can’t tell if he’s mocking me or not, but his face doesn’t look teasing. “I miss doing stuff like this. After the first Captain America movie,” I hear him unconsciously lower his voice, “things took off in a way I wasn’t expecting at all, and it’s just been harder to go anywhere and do these simple things anymore.” He pauses and looks back at me, a small smile on his lips. “I’m just glad I get to do them with you now.”

There’s no fighting the smile that crawls onto my face at that moment. So much is wrapped in such a small sentence. The appreciation, the thankfulness, and the promise. All in one.

“Me too,” I reply softly, meaning it wholeheartedly. “I’m glad I have someone to share them with now.”

Our sweet moment is interrupted when Dodger comes racing back over to Chris, putting his paws up on the bench and showing off the tennis ball in his mouth. Chris lets go of my hand to grab the tennis ball, holding it up with a laugh as Dodger dances around, his eyes focused on the toy.

“Where did you get this?” Chris glances at the ball, but it’s just a regular tennis ball.

My eyes catch the couple on the other bench, both laughing in our direction, presumably at Dodger. I tap Chris’s shoulder and point to them. “I think it’s theirs,” I explain. I raise my voice to say, “I’m so sorry!”

“It’s okay!” The man calls back. “He can have it. What’s his name?”

“Dodger,” Chris speaks up, then tosses the ball away. Dodger bolts for it, jumping in the air to catch the tennis ball mid-bounce.

“Thank you,” I wave.

I pull out my phone to capture the moment Chris falls onto his back, letting Dodger climb up onto him. He does this in his living room floor all the time, but something about seeing him do it here, outside in a dog park, makes it that much sweeter and I have to have it forever.

I get a particularly good photo of him where I can see his blinding smile, so I immediately make it my lockscreen. I had kind of been waiting for a picture I could use as my lockscreen that didn’t look so obviously Chris Evans, you know? I mean, I could write it off as having an obsession with him, like every other woman my age, but that would feel too dishonest. This picture, though, you can’t even tell that that’s Chris. So, if someone asks, I can wholeheartedly say, “That’s my soulmate.”

And I didn’t ever think that that would be something I’d want to do.

[its-jwang2017]

Interlude 2: Jaebeom

JB had only agreed to move to Chicago for two reasons; One was because he wanted to leave his small hometown after his 14th birthday when he realized he couldn’t keep his technopathic powers hidden much longer. The second was because he wanted to get out of the small bubble his hometown provided, where everyone knew everything about everyone whether they wanted to or not. To JB, the relentless whispers about his peculiar personality and quick-to-anger characteristics labeled him as a freak in his hometown, with the neighboring kids bullying him relentlessly in order to see for themselves how easy it was to anger “the bull”.

Kids can be really mean sometimes.

Even though he was labeled as “aggressive” and “weird” by the people in his village, there were some aspects about him that showcased his gentler side like his odd love for photography. There was just something entrancing about the way life ebbed and flowed around him, something beautiful to be found in every still moment that could be portrayed elegantly through a single camera shot or, on the flip-side, many singular moments combined together in one video. Through all of the harsh words subjected on him by his peers, Jaebeom looked for the shots that captured the happier moments in life as a way to escape the present. Even when he was younger, he would constantly use his fingers to create a frame around anything that caught his interest, whether it was a flower tilting over underneath the weight of a bumblebee or his friends laughter as they swung higher and higher on the swing set.

For his thirteenth birthday (the birthday that he realized every moment has to come to an end where even a picture couldn’t save it), he received two things; an old Polaroid camera stocked full of film and a goodbye note from his father, who had written a short explanation that he had fallen in love with the neighbor’s daughter and had fled the town to be with her.

There was no note that said if he would come back.

With the absence of his dad and his mother falling into a deep depression, JB fell deeper and deeper into the art, trying his best to capture the fleeting moments of happiness in every shot and bringing the best ones back for his mom. At first, he had hated the camera that mocked and reminded JB of his father’s heartless abandonment; it was really tempting at times to burn the camera as one last rebellion against his traitorous dad. But the passion for art won over his hate for his father and JB reluctantly kept the camera (he could never afford another one anyway). From that point on, Jaebeom kept the camera like it was the most precious treasure in the world and even picked up some odd jobs around their small neighborhood in order to continue to pay for film.

This did not get past the older boys in his neighborhood at all, who upped their ante and began taunting JB even more by making fun of the ludicrous notion that photography was too feminine for a boy JB’s age to be messing around with. JB did his best to squash the growing feelings of hatred and malice for the neighbors whispering is he a fairy? , of the other boys’ relentless taunts, and for his father labeling him and his mother as a rejected “family” to everyone in their town. He was burdened with being ‘the man of the house’, a position his father should have stayed to fill, and his responsibilities increased tenfold with having to provide for both him and his mother during her debilitating depression. Then, dealing with the faux sympathy from his neighbors and bullying at school… without even realizing it, JB became full of anger, anxiety and rage for the way life had unflinchingly dealt him a losing hand.

It almost came to a head one day, when JB’s powers were still at their beginning stages, where one of his tormentor’s jabs hit a little too close to home. Sometimes during JB’s nightmares, he can still hear the disgusted sneer of one of the older kids with the scathing comment, “Your dad would’ve stayed if you weren’t such a huge disappointment!” ringing in his ears as the hairs on his skin stand on end due to static lightly crackling around him.

He remembers the weird feeling of sparks dancing across his fingertips as he balled his fist in preparation for a sucker-punch. He would have thrown it too if the power bubbling underneath his skin wasn’t quelled by his mother suddenly tearing out of their small home, having overheard the whole exchange, with venom in her words and fire in her eyes. This marked the first time that JB had seen her get out of the bed in months.

Even with her shorter stature, none of the other kids were willing to duel with a protective eomma (out of both deep respect and blatant fear) and JB’s aggressors fled the scene in a split second, leaving both Im’s standing outside on the grass breathing harshly and fighting to regain control ( like mother like son, JB always recalled fondly).

The rest of that day was a blur in JB’s memory, in that he faintly remembers having a real conversation with his mom for the first time since his father left. Apparently his mom had, without him knowing, submitted an application to JYP prep with the pictures that he had given her throughout the past months. The reason why she had regained some of her energy was due to the fact that, out of thousands of students in the world, he had miraculously gotten accepted on that very day and had an open invitation to join the school to study Photography and Film.

JB’s relationship with his mom didn’t magically repair in the months that unfurled between his acceptance notice and his first real day at JYP international prep. In fact, a HUGE part of JB wanted to stay and support his mother while the other part of him desperately ( selfishly ) wanted to get away from her and her haunted silences, her blank stares, her lifeless form mechanically going through the motions of basic hygiene and eating. As his powers grew and fired randomly, he also began to become afraid that he would hurt his mother in his desperation to breathe some life back into her aura and he was worried he’d shock her if he wasn’t careful. His worry became overwhelming as his control kept slipping and he became eager to separate himself from the person he loved most as fear threatened to overwhelm him again.

Jaebeom sometimes thinks back to that day , when he had first noticed the sparks dancing around his fists as the dam inside of him almost broke underneath the harsh words spewed out of the other boy’s mouth, and he faintly wonders what would have happened if his mom hadn’t broken up the fight in time. That fateful moment was when his powers first broke free from within some hidden compartment of his physiology, spurred on by the wild emotions overtaking him in that split second. He never truly understood what forced the powers to manifest, why that day and why that time, but he never got a chance to really ask anybody as he did his best to keep his powers under wraps. However, he knew he wouldn’t be able to hide it for long and only chose to accept the invitation to JYP Prep at the very last second when a spark from his hand almost caused a fire while he was preparing dinner.

The last day at home had his mother looking more like herself than JB had seen since he could remember. She was all smiles and pride oozed out of inn her ever pore as JB packed up his most treasured possessions and clothes into a tiny suitcase.

The last time JB saw his mom was standing on their tattered wooden balcony, her skinny form looking lighter every minute as if a tremendous burden was slowly lifting off of her second by second. He recalled her smiling toothily at him as he entered the cab that would take him to the airport, remembers her waving furiously at him underneath the dazzling sunlight until she thought he couldn’t see him anymore, her hair a beautiful mixture of grey and reddish brown and her hands worn by time.

In present time he can barely recall her face, but he remembers the split second feeling of foreboding as the cab turned the corner, the last sight of his mother standing on their porch looking angelic in the sunlight staying with him.

A week later he got the call that his mother passed away.

Since it's in the past, I kept up with the italicized theme Literally, gag me. I have major writer's block. I can't even. I wrote this MONTHS AGO!! Months! And I've just been waiting to post because I still don't know if I fully like it or it's placement within the story line. At least you know more about JB as my character in this story. ADHJADIOASIJASIOAIOOJSJAKNJAF = how I feel at the moment. Please look back through the story because the first interlude is now replaced with Jinyoung's origin story (again, wrote it months ago and am just now posting RIIIIIIP!)

Any comments or kudos would be lovely and sincerely appreciated!

[in-tua-deep]

hmm, got any nice hcs or ideas you haven't gotten to talk about in other asks?? I'm still reeling from the magic/ians shitstorm that happened this week, cute stuff would be welcome(if you want to of course)

i absolutely do!! i don’t follow that show so i’m not sure what happened but i can absolutely provide soft and random content!!

Diego is the person who, when he had food that is bite sized, will toss it up in the air and catch it in his mouth. He will do this for everything, and yes it IS to establish dominance

i have a lot of thoughts about the family converting that depressing ass courtyard into a big old garden with flowers everywhere and maybe a vegetable garden/herb garden that Grace could help tend to and the kids could all sit out there and relax

i have a lot of thoughts and feelings about Five and flowers and appreciating green and growing things because i’m treating the ash in the apocalypse as being like, post a bunch of massive volcanic eruptions that kill a whole lotta shit and fuck up crops and plants hardcore and idk if 40 years is enough to recover because sometimes it can take hundreds of years to recover from that

okay this is a sad one but I headcanon that the first time Klaus really thought about the future was in a cot surrounded by the noises of the jungle and men snoring as he and Dave whispered back and forth about things they wanted to do after the war, where Dave would smile and tell Klaus about this little diner that wasn’t too far from his house growing up that made the best pancakes in the states and that one day Dave was going to take Klaus there, or about the ice cream place downtown that was just to die for, or the roller rink where Dave had all his birthday parties growing up and and and - just all the places Dave wanted to share with Klaus, all the places he planned on taking him, on showing him - and that’s the first time Klaus started actually planning towards a future, his future, their future

(at some point, Klaus does end up going to Dave’s hometown. Diego offered to drive him, but it ended up somehow being a family road trip. The roller rink closed down. The ice cream place is also closed, in its place is some fast food place. But the diner is still there, somehow. They all go in and Klaus cries into his pancakes when they arrive because this was something Dave had wanted to show him, a moment Dave had wanted him to have, and it aches aches aches)

Klaus 100% finds some buddies from his squad who are still alive who are absolutely gobsmacked to see Klaus because they 100% just assumed he’d cracked when he told them he was from the future and all that but here Klaus is, plain as day, and they’re all fucking thrilled to see him and are good

one of them shows Klaus pictures from a protest where the whole squad had shown up in Dave and Klaus’s names to advocate for gay marriage being legalized

also when Klaus tells them about time travel bullshit and is all “blame my brother” he absolutely 100% introduces Five to his war buddies and I genuinely can’t decide if this was a brilliant or terrible idea because Five is an old man who would absolutely get these old war dogs black sense of humor but also they would look at this child who looks around their grandkids age or whatever and be like “hmm. we’re adopting klaus first of all, on principle. we’re also adopting you. actually just. the whole family. all of you. you’re all traumatized infants, and any family of klaus is family of ours”

the whole family gets an squad of old veterans who are taking them all under their wings whether they like it or not tbh and they’re all chronologically older than Five anyway so respect ur elders son

HMM another headcanon i haven’t talked enough about is my artist!Five headcanon where, because Five feels a need to keep his hands busy, he turns from writing equations to drawing. He also did it in the apocalypse though, usually with a stick and a patch of dirt or something. Just doodling, scratching lines into dust and improving

this is basically just me trying to get my idiot son to do art therapy and start drawing and be really good at in and also end up sketching his siblings a whole lot (not always his siblings as they are now, but as they are in his memories: thirteen and fresh faced and the last time he saw them alive because the only other memory of them he had to cling to was the memory of their dead bodies for forty five years)

i have a random headcanon that Vanya fosters kittens in her spare time for no reason other than the fact that i like it and i like kittens and also i have a scene in my head where she hands a teeny baby kitten to like, Luther or one of the others and they’re just transfixed by how illegally tiny these kittens are what the heck

Klaus is the sibling who, when washing his hair with shampoo, spikes it into a mohawk for no reason other than simple zest for life. He also sings in the shower, and i’m talking like operatic singing and he’s certainly going to try and hit all those high notes. He won’t manage it and WILL sound like he’s slowly being murdered, but he’s certainly going to try

the first time he does this in the house three of his siblings bust into the bathroom convinced the commission came back and klaus is startled and screams and when he finds out why they busted in is all offended like “clearly i am the only sibling with CULTURE so FUCK YOU ALL”

i have so many headcanons about Claire and Five tbh for no reason other than the fact that i think they would be a terrifyingly chaotic duo because Five is 100% willing to just go with whatever Claire has plans for and absolutely no frame of reference for what is an isn’t appropriate for a child to be doing so when Claire is like “hey how fast do you think i can slide down the banister” five is right there going “hmm idk but i’ll time you if you want”

five and claire, showing up at the picnic covered in mud and soaking wet, holding frogs: what’s up everyone we caught dinner

klaus buys the whole family matching heelies because i say so and because it seems like the kind of impulse purchase that Klaus would make tbh

i feel like klaus instigates a lot of childish activities that the whole family ends up participating in. Why yes, Luther, we have taken over the entirety of the living room to build this big ass box fort. Why no, Luther, you aren’t allowed inside it and if you come close we WILL pelt you with these scrunched up balls of paper we have decided to use as ammunition. I can assure you that Diego is just as accurate with paper balls as he is with knives, Luther

this has ended up being a lot of Klaus but look if you think Klaus doesn’t demand that Luther give him piggybacks and carry him places then you’re just wrong because he would also demand that of every single sibling and will throw himself at them regardless of whether they’re actually capable of holding him up or not (Vanya is,, deceptively strong surprisingly enough)

Five, like a cat, will splay out and lay in patches on sunlight in the house. Maybe he could have been left alone about this habit, but Klaus decided to start doing it as well in solidarity and now the others end up tripping over one of their brothers limbs entering a room and end up on the floor swearing up a storm

okay that’s all i got for now

come back later and u may receive more Random Headcanons a la moi

[stvrshinc]

  °✧｡× :  (  zendaya coleman + non-binary +  they/them )  ───  welcome to roselake village, lydia beckett !  oh, well, i suppose you’ve been here for three months, so perhaps you already know your way around the town. well, you are the twenty-two year old scientist, though, right ? the harvest sprites told me about you ! they said you do not believe in the harvest goddess. oh, my. well, that explains why they also said you’re quite principled and decisive, but can also be a bit stubborn and close-minded. either way, you should be a wonderful addition to our island ! i guess i’ll leave you to it now, but if i need you, i suppose i’ll just look for you at de la lune, yeah ? we hope you love it here as much as we do ! oh, and remember not to go into the tulsy woods ! cheeks stained with ink from falling asleep on notes , wild hair curling over a starched white collar , chalkboards covered corner-to-corner in indecipherable calculations ! ✧ 

A BITCH FINALLY FINISHED okay here we go what’s up, babes !! it’s ya boi, mozzie. i’m 8teen ( a babie , i know ) and i am in hast ! literally no one else is gonna be in that timezone, and i’ve accepted this fact. i go by they/them and uhhhhh got nothing else to say about myself. anyways, i’ll be out here trying my best so pls feel free to hit me for a good time !! or at least, moderately entertaining time.

 S T A T S

full name: lydia beckett

nickname(s): becks

age: twenty-two

date of birth: february 10

gender: non-binary

pronouns: they/them

hometown: flagstaff, arizona

parent(s)/sibling(s): elijah becket ( father ), charlotte beckett ( mother ), amelie grace nee beckett ( sister -five years older ), virginia beckett ( sister - three years older ), isaac beckett ( brother - two years younger )

orientation: science

occupation: grad student - they out here working on their thesis baby !!

P H Y S I C A L

face claim: zendaya coleman

hair colour: dark brown with golden highlights from being in the sun too long

eye colour: hazel

height: 5′8′’

tattoos: n/a - may get some in the future

piercings: standard lobe piercings on both ears. belly button piercing that she got with her sister when they graduated that they haven’t told anyone about. 

distinguishing characteristics: wildly curly hair that they refuse to wear any other way besides natural. known to throw it up haphazardly with pencils/pen sticking out randomly in different directions.

A B O U T

can i just say that they boring as shit until they get to rose lake??

lydia grew up the middle child in a huge family, with siblings and cousins constantly underfoot. their parents loved them all, but obviously were more than busy trying to take care of the horde. with a burgeoning lawyer and star athlete for older siblings and a leading thespian as a younger sibling, lydia found themselves falling into the role of quiet, studious middle child.

they convinced themselves into thinking that there wasn’t anything special about them and that they wouldn’t amount to much. they resigned themselves to a life of constantly being surpassed, up until they decided in high school that they would use their smarts to try and change the world.

they got into *insert fancy school here that would be most convenient plot-wise* on a partial-ride scholarship and decided to pursue environmental science ! college is where they thrived, mostly because they were surrounded by other people who had the same goals as them and were willing to work hard for it. 

environmental science isn’t particularly competitive as a field, but being female-presenting in male-dominated world forced them to speak out more and thus, their middle-child syndrome began to become more prominent. they felt the unending need to prove themselves to others, and they began to steal attention for themselves.

they decided to continue environmental sciences in graduate school, mostly because they weren’t done being a student, but also because graduate school opened up more research opportunities. this is what lead them to roselake in the first place.

they had signed up for a highly-coveted research position in the arctic circle (let’s say,,,,,,,somewhere in scandinavia) but due to some clerical error, they missed out on the spot and was forced to take the only remaining spots left, which sent them to roselake with a miniscule group of two lead scientist and one other grad student. suffice to say, they aren’t exactly happy about it.

P E R S O N A L I T Y

they are a bitch ! absolute grump this one !!

middle child syndrome like nobody’s business. they need to be the best and  is not afraid to step on anyone else on their way to being the best. it a good thing they are in science because if they were in a more competitive field, they’d probably have thrown hands by this point.

 they value their intelligence very much and they like to put the world into neat boxes. sciences makes sense to them. they understand biology and physics but not people so much and never magic, so they absolutely do not believe in the harvest sprites. 

they’re kind of vehemently against the idea of the sprites, so they will be dismissive and often cold with anyone who does believe in the sprites. they do feel like its a loaf of horseshit.

they are going to boost themselves using this tiny town and they will end up with an international prize if it kills them, so they are going to make certain that they find the source of the town’s ecological decline and they are certain there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for it all. their thesis is gonna smack.

honestly kind of feral. tends to get that crazed scientist look about them if they go too long on a research binge with no rest. 

not too interested in making friends in roselake, but i bet there are definitely people interested in making friends with them. 

pls get them to chill the fuck out and get the giant stick from out of their ass.

W A N T E D  C O N N E C T I O N S

pretty pls can someone bring me either the other grad student or any of their leads o-o they can be anything they want i would just love to see someone fully appreciating lydia’s scientific brilliance but absolutely unable to handle everything else about them.

throw all the harvest sprites at them. do your best pls.

friends??? spare friends for them please??? they aren’t going to know how to handle people liking them for their personality lmao so pls baffle them

enemies!! this could be someone else on the team scientist who have differing opinions, either on the harvest sprites or on literally anything else!! this could also just be towns folk who don’t like them cause they’re a dick!! anything !! fight them !!

[b-kitsune]

Many ways to say I love you: Day Eight.

Kidge-a-palooza 2019 Prompt: Discourage. Pairing: Kidge (VLD) Universe: Lesbian!AU. Status: Part 1/2.

Keith was worried, and her heart trembled slightly when she couldn't see Pidge anywhere in the bar seats. She had stood up for five seconds to greet an old high school friend with whom she had lost contact for many years, and it was enough time to lose her among the sea of ​​people in that place.

Where the hell had she gone?

''Keith, is everything okay?'' She heard Hunk at her side when he watched her worried, she nodded with a growl coming out of her throat.

''Yeah, I've just lost sight of someone.''

''Awww, have you finally got a girlfriend after all these years? I'm very proud of you!''

''It's ... Actually a friend.''

She answered in a faint whisper that it cost Hunk to listen when they approached the bars for a drink. But he definitely didn't overlook the way she had said it. The girl who was missing at the bar was someone important to Keith.

''Will not you go find her?''

''No, she must be with Shiro on the terrace. If she had left, she would have called me.'' She answered without further ado while taking a sip of black vodka when it was delivered. While a curiously ornate drink came into Hunk's hands. Keith looked at him curiously.

''What? I like cocktails, they are cute and sweet.''

''Okay, I'm the least likely person to recriminate you for what you drink.'' Keith answered with a shrug.

''Is Shiro also in this bar too?''

Hunk asked interested, Shiro had been his martial arts teacher many years ago and remembered him with real appreciation. Keith's older brother was a kind and talented person who always knew what to say at the right time.

''Sure, although we prefer the less ... Noisy, we knew this place thanks to Allura, a friend of the university. And it has good music, unlike many others.''

''I see.'' Hunk drank a little more of his own cocktail.

''And what have you done? Since you moved to California, we didn't hear from you again, not even Lance knew about you.''

''Yeah, well ... It's been difficult years, my mother got sick and we had to take care of her. But everything is fine now.''

''I'm glad to hear it, buddy.''

Keith smiled in sympathy when Hunk began to talk about what he had done when he moved to his mother's hometown. She had missed him quite a bit in recent years, but she couldn't keep her concentration when Pidge's face rested on her thoughts in her mind.

She sensed that she was outside with Shiro, and she assumed that if she looked out the window Keith could see her smoking next to her brother, away from the noise inside.

The problem was that Pidge didn't want her company at that moment, she was rejecting her completely and Keith couldn't blame her.

However, it was all Lance's fault, not hers. Her stupid best friend turned out to be a terribly toxic relationship for the poor girl during the time they spent together, and Pidge's heart ended up shattered some months ago. He had thrown her the day when Pidge found him kissing with another girl in his apartment, the bastard didn't even apologize when she demanded explanations. Subsequently, Lance didn't even prove to be sorry when she was confronted the next day when things were a little calmer and Pidge needed to pick up some things she had left in his apartment when they spent some nights together.

Keith could be angry with Lance and want to break his face for making her cry, completely oblivious to how they were both becoming in the last time, but deep-down Keith knew that something like this would happen sooner or later. Lance had never shown any real interest in Pidge before they started dating, she was sure he didn't even know her real name.

It hurt to see Pidge through the corridors of the university labs with a stony, expressionless face, swallowing pain to perform in the final examinations as if nothing had happened. When in the background Keith knew that all she wanted to do was scream in pain for her beloved love.

And Keith ... She was lost in a stupid crush that would never be reciprocated.

She loved the foolish Katherine Holt from the day she saw her in an advanced physics class, she approached her with a random question and since then they began to get closer and closer, getting to introduce themselves to their own families. Pidge had congenial almost immediately with Shiro and her parents, and Keith had found a friendly rivalry with Matt when they met, the Holt family was always very kind to her when she visited them.

She had come to think illusively, that maybe her feelings could be reciprocated by that pretty girl with big glasses. But when she introduced her to Lance, she knew immediately that she would never have a chance with Katie Holt. Being rejected even before confessing.

Baby, I don't feel so good

Six words you never understood

Keith moaned audibly when she heard that song that resonated on the bar loudspeakers, preferring to go outside to light a cigar and stop complaining. Hunk preferred to remain silent and accompany her. Anyway, he had lost his friends for many hours, and being with Keith to relive old times was much more fun.

Four days has never felt so long

If three's a crowd and two was us

One slipped away

When Keith reached the door and lit the first cigar of the night, she felt that her chest was hit by a person. She was, in general, a fairly tall woman compared to the average, thanks to her mother's Russian heritage, so it used to happen regularly that low women tended to hit her by accident.

I just wanna make you feel okay

But all you do is look the other way, mm

But when she looked down, she realized it was Pidge who had decided to bury her face between her chest. While holding her tightly around her waist.

I can't tell you how much I wish I didn't wanna stay

I just kinda wish you were gay

Keith groaned defeated when her heart was painfully compressed, the damn girl was stupidly adorable without even trying. She had fallen so deep for her. Hunk for his part preferred to ignore them and go to Shiro when he saw him in the distance sitting in one of the chairs.

Is there a reason we're not through?

Is there a 12 step just for you?

Our conversation's all in blue

''Keith, I feel dizzy.''

''That's because you've been drinking too much, shorty.''

She responded like a big sister scolding her for her bad behavior, she was drunk up and could barely stay on her own feet. Keith looked up and saw Shiro laughing with Adam when he greeted Hunk in a warm embrace, the idiot hadn't realized how much Pidge had drunk while flirting with his co-worker.

To spare my pride

To give your lack of interest an explanation

Do not say I'm not your type

Keith took her by the waist with one hand, while with the other she took her cigar to exhale the smoke away from her face, walking towards an area where they wouldn't interrupt the way of the people who walked around. Pidge watched her, curious, with those big eyes full of life while leaning much more on the body of Keith.

''Keith, Keith ...'' She repeated, again and again when she staggered around her body, Keith breathed trying to find some patience. ''Why do you have a boy's name?''

''I already told you, my mother thought it was nice and neutral.''

''I like it.'' Without realizing, Pidge took her cigar to take a deep breath while briefly closing her eyes. Keith looked at her resignedly, had definitely drunk too much. ''It's strange, like you.''

''Thank you?'' Responded resentfully. So Pidge stroked the outline of her cheek with a downcast look.

''No, don't get mad, I mean I like it, like you. It's the best name ... I swear it.''

''I understand you, Pidge. It's okay.''

Just say that I'm not your preferred sexual orientation

I'm so selfish

But you make me feel helpless, yeah

Keith had to do something with Pidge's hands. She was being too cheeky stroking her while wiggling around her. She had to be patient, wherever she was, or else she could do something that would end their friendship. Keith couldn't help but, inside her mind, an inner voice told her that it was what she wanted, that she was tempting her to kiss her and take whatever she wanted from her.

I just wanna make you feel okay

But all you do is look the other way

I can not tell you how much I wish I did not want to stay

But Keith knew it was impossible. She told herself to discourage her real intentions. Even with Pidge's breath gently touching the contour of her collarbone, and her hands holding her waist tightly to try to bring her closer to her body, in a vain attempt not to fall cause of her drunkenness.

''You're the only good thing I have left in this life.'' Pidge said, dragging the words in her mouth. ''I'd be so lost if you left me, Keith... Never get mad at me, please.''

''I would never get mad at you.'' She answered while watching her take the last puffs of her stolen cigar. ''I love you so much to get away from me.''

''Seriously?'' Pidge asked temptingly, with a cheeky smile when she got closer and closer to her. ''How much do you love me, Keith? More than Lance?''

''Of course more than Lance!''

That name bothered her for a moment, seeing herself being compared to him didn't generate a good taste in her mouth, much less in a situation where she had so close to Pidge that the distance became tiny, almost reaching to taste her lips. If Keith was close enough, surely, she could ...

''You know? Every day I wonder ... Again, and again, something that hasn't let me sleep.''

''Oh yeah? What?'' Whispered, without breaking eye contact with those golden eyes that just kept open.

''Something that makes me think you would be mad at me if I told you ...''

''I will not get mad.''

''Because you love me.'' Pidge replied Keith nodded. ''But maybe... Sometimes when you're so good to me, I wonder ... How would it have been to kiss you instead of Lance that night ...''

''Kiss me ...'' Keith repeated, drinking from the image she had of Pidge at that moment, with her lips open, her face flushed, and her eyes needy. ''You are drunk.''

''Yes.'' Shrugged. ''But I also imagine it, again and again, as it would have been, and the next night, and the next, and the next ...''

Their lips collided as they both approached, gently, unhurriedly. Being so natural that at no time did they feel bad with the touch of the other. Slowly savoring the taste of their mouths, they held each other tightly when they felt the taste of black vodka and tobacco mingling with each other, like something toxic, intoxicating, suffocating in brief moments when they didn't go away in a long time.

I just wish you were gay

I just wish you were gay

Pidge closed her eyes, letting herself be carried away by the moment she had waited so long since she realized that her feelings weren't purely platonic. Keith never did, thinking that if she closed her eyes and lost the image of her at any moment, it would vanish like a broken dream.

I just wish you were gay

It was a kind and slow kiss, which was repeated that night before and after leaving the bar. Continued in Keith's apartment when they needed a little more privacy, and continued, again, and again, and again...

[feelingsinthedark]

Jem & Lunar New Year part 2

there are qoaad spoilers and it’s long so under the cut :3 hope yall likeee

Chinese New Year of 2013...

...they have a new addition to the family

Kit lol

And also their unborn children

Tessa’s like a little over 6 months pregnant so in the third trimester and it’s going pretty well

They just do some simple things at home and take it easy

Tessa and Jem give Kit 红包 even though he doesn’t really need money because they insist on buying everything for him

They teach him some phrases like 过年好 and give him the 红包 when he masters it

(But like that’s kind of a thing I feel like my parents are training us like this year my mom walks into my room with a red envelope and she’s like “what do you say” and I said 过年好 and she gave me the red envelope lol)

And they watch the 春节晚会 together

Kit doesn’t understand anything but he just likes spending time with them

And he’s able to appreciate the production bc damn its fucking fancy af and like there must be like soooooo much rehearsal beforehand it’s crazyyy

Tessa catches the bit where they talk about spending Chinese New Year in your hometown bc that’s a big thing with the holiday

She asks Jem about it and if he wants to go to his hometown even though the main point is to be with your family

He just says “you are my home now, always and forever”

Kit pretends to gag but secretly he loves it and is #1 Jessa stan

No wait he’s #2 Will is #1

Chinese New Year of 2014 they spend with friends

Alec is busy with Clave-in-exile stuff that Magnus isn’t involved in so Magnus just decides to Portal to Devon with his kids bc why not

And Tessa and Jem have a new addition to their family too

Charlotte Sophie Carstairs

This is the best baby Carstairs name fight me

She’s about 10 months old

Tessa’s feeding Charlotte when Magnus appears but she isn’t surprised

This happened a few months ago too

And a few days after Charlie was born

She just calmly greets Magnus and the kids and asks Kit to go find Jem

They weren’t really planning on doing anything bc they were so busy with Charlotte

But since they’re here Jem decides to have them help make dumplings

Out of the two of them Tessa is the better cook but Jem is okay too

And they had some more practice with dumplings in the years before so it’s not like their first try

Tessa mostly sits it out and watches over the kids

Charlie loves her older cousins Max and Rafe

They also try making some

Max makes a squashed little lump of dough that has a tiny bit of filling inside

Rafe’s is a little better and sort of resembles a dumpling but also doesn’t have much inside

Alec Portals in a few hours later (he got Clary to make him a Portal idk)

He finished the Clave stuff earlier than he expected

So he just joins them and they eat dumplings

They put on the 春节晚会 after

No one’s really paying attention to it

The kids aren’t bc they don’t understand it so they’re kinda running around and so the parents are occupied

So it’s just kinda on in the background

At one point there’s a magician guy who… does some magic

Like just suuuuper complex sleight of hand kinda tricks

Max sees it and is like “he does magic! My papa can do magic! Auntie Tessa does magic too!”

So then it turns into a magic show from papa Magnus and Auntie Tessa

Charlotte loves seeing magic and it calms her down so eventually she’s asleep on Jem’s chest

Magnus and Alec and their kids leave

Tessa and Jem put Charlie in her crib and Will’s ghost keeps her asleep

Jem is kinda feeling things about how he didn’t think he would live long enough to have a family or wouldn’t be able to bc of Silent Brotherhood but he just had an amazing Chinese New Year with his wife and children and his nephews and some of his best friends

Chinese New Year of 2015 they decide to spend in Shanghai

Jem hasn’t been there since his parents’ death

But Tessa’s there for him and even Kit knows his story too

And he wants to show them and his daughter how they celebrate in China

They stay in a hotel bc they’re not technically part of the Clave anymore so they can’t go back to the Institute

And besides there’s a lot of memories there for Jem

Charlie’s almost two and she has picked up some Mandarin from Jem (which is like wildly different from “Shanghai-nese” but whatever)

She’s a really outgoing toddler and everyone who meets her falls in love with her

She talks to a lot of people just on the street and says 过年好 to everyone in her adorable baby voice with her adorable baby face

Kit is highkey proud of his little sister and carries her around on his shoulders

He knows how to say like two things in Chinese and not well but Tessa and Jem let him take Charlotte out to just walk around sometimes

Jem takes them to some outdoor markets and stuff and they buy some cute stuff

They also buy some firecrackers and set them off on Chinese New Year morning

Charlie loves loud noises so she loves that the whole day and night there are firecrackers going off and it makes her really excited and happy

Kit stays up with Charlie that night when she’s all excited by the firecrackers so Jem and Tessa can try to sleep a little bit

Chinese New Year of 2016 and onward are variations of these last few

Jem and Tessa spend many Chinese New Years with just the two of them and their children

Sometimes they join or are joined by friends

They go to China a couple more times but for Jem just being with Tessa and his family is more than enough

One year they spend it with all the Blackthorns after Kit and Ty get married what

It’s pretty unconventional and more of just a gathering but they’re all one super happy and big family

And the Blackthorns are technically related to Tessa if they actually descended from Lucie and Jesse

Eventually Kit leaves to live with Ty but he tries to spend most years with Jem and Tessa

He loves his family and he wants to spend time with them especially this holiday with its emphasis on being with family

Eventually their kids move out too

They have a few quiet relaxing Chinese New Years when their kids are busy and can’t make it

And of course

The hands wrapping the dumplings start to get wrinkled

The hair that Tessa cuts every year starts to go grey

She’s reminded of Jem when they first met and he was dependent on the yin fen

His eyes stay dark though, and full of joy and health

Chinese New Year of 2088-

Ok sorry back to your regularly scheduled sadnessheadcanons

Chinese New Year of 2088 is Jem’s last

Just getting straight to the point skskskskskssksk

He’s obviously lived a very long and satisfying life

He stayed healthy so he’s able to do stuff still even at almost 230 years old

(Yeah idk if the timeline is realistic I don’t think it is but whateverrrrr)

That morning Tessa wakes up and Jem’s already out of bed

His side of the bed is cold and for a second Tessa thinks her nightmares have come true and Jem was ripped from her in the middle of the night

But she hears violin music coming from down the hall

She follows it after getting dressed

Not unlike her first night in the London Institute

She stops in the doorway and watches Jem

He plays a hauntingly sweet and sad melody

She stands there for a while until he finishes

He turns and says quietly “I wrote it for you, my love”

There are tears on both their cheeks from the song

He’s written many songs for Tessa over the years but this one is different

Jem poured all his happiness from previous Chinese New Years, his love for Tessa and their children, his regret for having to leave her soon, probably this year

He cups her face and wipes her tears

“Let’s have one more Chinese New Year together”

Tessa kisses him and even after so many years every kiss between them is the same

“We won’t think about that today, love,” she says

“We won’t think about that today,” he agrees, grasping her hands in his

Their kids Charlotte and Will join them with their families

Kit and Ty and their kids come too

Over the years Jem and Tessa have developed their own traditions for Chinese New Year and they also do stuff like dumplings and they give 红包 to their kids and grandkids

That night Tessa and Jem watch the 春节晚会 by themselves in bed

Their kids and their families have left with the promise that they’ll all see each other again soon

Tessa’s head is on Jem’s shoulder

He holds her tightly to his side

When they finish they sit in silence for a while

Tessa’s half-asleep when she breathes “stay”

Jem brushes her arm and whispers “I’m not going anywhere”

Chinese New Year of 2089 Jem has finally reunited with hisparabatai

[poemsforcowboys]

What a Feeling // Freddie Mercury

2  3  4  5 

Pairing: Freddie Mercury and Katy Newton (OC) 

Summary: Before she moved from London to New York at the age of thirteen, Katy Newton had always been friends with Brian May. He was the only one she knew who encouraged her creative side, especially her designs for fashion and makeup. So much so, that Katy is hired as Queen's newest stylist. But what she doesn't expect is her knew found friend, Freddie Mercury. Will their casual flirts lead to anything of substance? Or will their relationship just become another lost love as they both make their journey towards self acceptance. 

Warnings: there will be smut eventually but not in this chapter, bisexuality (?), feels 

CHAPTER ONE 

"Kathryn, dear get up, it's nearly noon!" at the sound of her mother's shrill voice, the barely conscious mess of dark blue hair groaned into her pillow. It wasn't even late for christ's sake. And, this was one of the only times she could really sleep in anymore, her job at a thrift store in the upper west side had weird hours, but it was the only time she would be getting paid to help sew and repair fabrics, something she loved to do and only wanted to improve with. The new job wasn't providing her with enough money to keep up with the rent in her old apartment, so she had reluctantly moved back in with her parents and younger brother.

"Kathryn!" her mother yelled again, but this time with a different tone, could she be excited? Positivity was not something Mrs. Newton was the best at, as it was not something she valued highly.

"Come look at the telly! Kathryn!" Katy huffed, that's what she'd rather be called, and told her mother this many times, it was a decision she made when she realized she wanted to be known for her art. A vital part of her that was ignored by her family, and only one of many including her new hair color and fashion sense.

"What is it, Mum?" Katy's British accent had disappeared for the most part, but sometimes made an appearance, especially when she was around her family. Her older brother Daniel and her parents had been able to maintain their accents through their move from Hampton, London, England to New York City in 1960. Unlike them, Katy was only thirteen and had just begun to make friends in her hometown.

She begrudgingly called back and rolled out of her bed, accidentally stepping on one of the many crumpled sketches on her floor. What she wanted to be doing in her twenties was thrive through her designs and cosmetology skills, but her parents had made their disappointment clear many times. They resented her for going down this path especially it being one of an artist, they were both lawyers, even now still encouraging her to go to law school and offering to pay for it.

She gave herself one quick glance to her mirror in the corner of her room, wanting to make sure the makeup she wore last night hadn't turned her into something like a rabid animal. Katy had brown eyes, and to her, they were nothing more than that. Often she'd wear bright eyeshadow, maybe a deep red or an electric blue, always intending on looking like nothing less than art. She was only about 5 feet, making her the punchline to many jokes, and some of the fashion statements she wanted to make more difficult to pull off.

"Kathryn! It's Brian! On the telly!"

Katy actually turned her head this time, and went quickly to their small living room to see what her mother was talking about.

Katy did not have many friends when she was growing up in London, and to say that was an understatement. She was shy and often seen as a loner, except for when she was with Brian May. He had stuck by her as many of his own friends thought she was odd or awkward, he never thought that. He was polite to her father and looked up to Daniel, Katy's own mum had made jokes about wanting them to marry and always wanted to insinuate something that as twelve year olds, Brian and Katy just couldn't understand. When she moved to New York, it was even harder to establish any relationships she thought would last, which is why she turned to art. There was nothing she loved more than to sketch the people of New York City, the only difference between her art and reality was they were wearing outfits she had designed to enhance their natural beauty. So, she didn't have many friends but she did have art, and living in New York City made that easier for her to cultivate, and harder for her parents to control. It was all too often that she would sneak onto the fire escape and leave to dance or just have a smoke, she was nothing like her family and they all knew this.

But Brian always loved her, he always accepted her for the individual she was, and he was devastated she found out she was moving.

It indeed was that same Brian who was playing guitar and performing on stage and live television for what looked like thousands of people. Katy instantly recognized him, then smiled at the sight of his new hairdo, on her faded small screen he looked like a poodle and it reminded her, and her mother as she could tell, of when he would get scared of Katy's tiny dog Finn, whenever he came over to play.

It wasn't just Brian's face on their 1972 Sony Trinitron Television, but he was playing guitar with three other men in front of a huge crowd.

She watched each one of them perform and nodded her head to the beat, Brian was killing it and she knew her mother secretly completely agreed, her foot tapping the whole time. Katy's gaze rested for an extra moment on the lead singer, he was clad in a yellow striped sweater and black polka dot sequin jacket, one that she quite rather liked the fit of.

"Kathryn! They're touring America!" the credits began to roll on the screen, listing the various dates of their 1974 American tour dates over an image of her one true friend in her life doing what he loved. "Do you still talk to Brian? You should invite him for dinner, your father would like that, and the drummer can come too?" her mother never joked like this, but Brian always had a special place in her heart for being so kind to her daughter, even when she wasn't.

"Oh Kathryn if you don't go, I will" she remarked when her daughter just continued to stare at the screen, the picture changed to one of the blond drummer.

Katy couldn't help but agree with her, maybe not about the dinner, but she had missed her old friend. They had always kept in touch, the telephone definitely made that easier, but neither of them ever had the money or the time to reconnect in person. Of course, Brian had told her a little about the band he was in, but he was always humble and promised to tell her more when they met in person.

The tickets for their New York show were pricey to say the least, Katy tried a few box offices and a few friends before finally realizing Brian should just meet her somewhere in the city instead. Not knowing how exactly to reach him, she called his mother, Ruth who still lived in that same Hampton neighborhood in London, and, who was more than happy to give her a way to reconnect with Brian.

She pressed her ear nervously to her pink rotary phone as she held it and played with the chord, twirling it around her fingers and walking around her room, for all she knew his agent could answer. On one of the last rings, she finally hear some rustling and a connection.

"'ello?" Now that she thought about it, Katy couldn't remember the last time she had actually had the time to catch up with her friend, but despite this she recognized his voice instantly.

"Brain!" She laughed into the phone, relieved to be hearing his voice and not a stranger's.

"Shady Katy?" he questioned back, on the other end of Katy's line, he was just as excited that this call was from her and not a stranger.

"I've missed you! Are you still studying astrophysics?"

"Not exactly" he laughed "I'm assuming mum gave you this number?"

"She did, and she told me to give you a kiss too"

He groaned, as did she when first prodded by Ruth earlier.

"I'm sorry about that, you know how it is" Katy nodded and laughed, she did.

The two caught up as if nothing had changed except their situation, and that may have been true, although it felt like it had been forever for the both of them since they actually hugged for the last time. Eventually the conversation digressed to Queen's - Katy now knew that as the band that sent her modest friend into riches - tour of America, specifically their New York shows.

"I would love to come Bri, I really would, but I don't have the money right now, what if we meet for drinks?" Brian just laughed, he was rolling his eyes, unsure of how naive his closest childhood friend was truly being.

"Don't worry about that, Katy Shady Lady," she huffed at the dumb nickname, "are you at least free on that night? Oh and, have you made any friends yet?" confused as to how Brian could be free on the night of one of his shows, she answered anyways with a yes to both questions. Besides Brian, and since her transition to New York, she had gained one more close friend, a film student from one of her philosophy classes at school. Jo was always the first to see and most excited by the clothing Katy designed, often volunteering to model. As if anyone could detest anyway, she was beautiful and easily could've made it as an actress in Hollywood as opposed to behind the scenes - what she wanted - she appreciated Katy in a way that even Brian couldn't, she knew her for the new her and encouraged it.

"So it's settled?" Brian asked, tugging her along the joke that she still did not understand.

"What? Where would you like to go for dinner? I mean we could visit my parents but they-" "Katy, I'm sending you three tickets in the mail, make sure that night stays free, yeah?"

She nodded and smiled before realizing he could not see her, and finally accepted his proposition, after having to make sure he was certain he could do that. Sometimes she forgot how wonderful true friends could be, she was just worried she had to find one more to go with her to the concert now.

-

Jo had not stopped talking about how excited she was for the show that night. Actually, she hadn't been able to stop talking about it since Katy invited her, three weeks ago.

"Joey, stop moving for one second before I poke your eye out" she was attempting to coat her friend's brown with a hint of green eyes in a gold liner she had made herself.

"Okay fine but when I'm in Love with My Car comes on you're gonna need to give me a second" her friend looked up at her, her eyes now looking more beautiful than ever, as Katy's record player spinned in her dimly lit room. She didn't own any of their records them but Jo did, and brought her collection over to listen to as they got ready for the concert.

"So, who did you decide to bring tonight?" she ignored Jo's previous statement, mostly because she didn't know the song, and continued to apply glitter to her eyes and eyebrows, grateful that Jo let her experiment so much with her looks. Katy had also let her choose the third person to bring, as she had many more friends than Katy did and she honestly didn't quite care, whoever she chose always ended up being someone unique.

"Oh, um," Jo blushed and looked away, it wasn't usual that Katy saw her like this, flustered.

"Well, her name is Michelle, you know Michelle, and um, she's in my film class, she's really pretty and offered to be in my next video, she's really nice, you're going to love her, I promise" Katy just smiled, she could tell Jo was nervous but anyone Jo liked, Katy would be more than happy to meet.

"Done!" she took Jo over to her mirror to show her the final look. She was beautiful, as always of course, Katy couldn't help but stare. She was much taller, with curly brown hair and the ability to pull off any look. Tonight it was a white long gown that made her into a goddess, one of Katy's earlier and simpler pieces, the city was going to be too cold for anything too experimental.

She then quickly did her own makeup, light green eyeshadow tonight and big wings, something reminiscent of the 1950s but with more spunk,

"A 50s housewife gone wrong" she remarked to Jo. That was basically her brand, nostalgia with a burst of New Age.

"I love it" Jo smiled, admiring her friend's brave and bold approaches.

They met Michelle at the venue, it wasn't exactly Madison Square Garden, but it was much bigger than Katy expected. Michelle was taller than Jo, lean and tan with curly hair and bright eyes, when she spotted them, she ran up to Jo and smiled, kissing her on the cheek and grabbing her hand. Katy watched them, Jo laughing, introducing the two most important people in her life to each other. She never explicitly said anything to Katy about her love life, but they both knew Katy knew, only Jo did not realize how happy and intrigued it made Katy feel to know, and to fully accept.

"Brian and I want to see each other before the show, is that okay?"

"Is that okay" Jo laughed "of course it's fucking okay I've been waiting to meet Roger Taylor for my entire goddamn life" Michelle nodded her head in agreement, she complimented Jo's dress, and Katy's work. It was clear she was hiding her excitement in order to appear calm, something Jo could see right through. They put their backstage passes on and suddenly felt like they were being treated differently. Katy couldn't tell if a fan with long blonde hair was staring at her in jealousy or something else, she ignored it as she waited for Jo to figure out where exactly they were going.

"This way!" she motioned for her two friends to follow her, Jo was fine with always have to be the one to ask the questions, it was a task she had learned to love.

It was as if they went through one door and their whole perspectives changed. Suddenly they were backstage, people running around them, some holding water, cameras, extra drumsticks, Katy didn't know where to look until Michelle just pointed. All the way in the back corner, was a van with the Queen logo poorly drawn and even more poorly taped to the door. A wave of excitement overcame Katy as she quickly made her way over, with her friends unsurely trailing behind.

She knocked on the door, nervous at the sudden realization that a different bandmate might answer. She heard yelling from inside the tiny silver van. Some of it was definitely music, but she didn't think the sound of glass breaking and a sudden "DEAKY LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE" were from any record. Just then, she saw someone else peak through the blinds on the truck window right next to the door. She thought it could be Brian, the man was wearing aviators and only peaked his eyes through so she really couldn't tell, but he didn't seem to recognize her, and actually looked slightly annoyed to see her.

Suddenly, the door swung open, and Katy was face to face with her childhood friend, she hadn't seen him in over a decade. She ran into her best friend's arms and heard a faint squeal she knew could only belong to Jo from behind her.

Brian, also enveloped in this hug, was trying to ignore the loud complaining of his bandmate who was audible although he was still fully inside the van.

"Roger, how many times do I have to say it to you darling! I just simply will not go on stage without my eyes done, now where the hell is is Debbie?! I can do it myself she just has my makeup"

"Sorry about them, blueberry" Brian mocked her good naturedly, "can I meet your new friends?"

The blinds on the car window were suddenly pulled up, revealing an impatient yet attractive man with long hair and bangs, the aviators now clipped to his robe, looking for someone. It caused Brian to shoot an annoyed glance, he hoped Freddie would get a grip on his damn temper or Debbie, their formal makeup artist - who Freddie often spoke poorly of due to her "dullness"- would show up to her only job.

Jo took that opportunity to cough loudly and grab an equally excited Michelle's hand "Yeah Katy, please introduce us to your friend, please" she said in a smiling tone, waving to Brian, whose attitude changed to excitement as he waved back and walked over.

But Katy's eyes were still on the window where the lead singer of her friend's band was looking out from moments ago. She hoped he would walk by again, and heard he was looking for makeup.

"Roger!" From inside the car, Freddie's tone had suddenly changed completely. He did not expect to see such a unique looking person outside his truck, when he was wearing nothing at all besides a robe. "Roger!" he snapped, trying to get the attention of his friend, suddenly aware of how loud he was being before.

"What, Fred?" he looked up from brushing his hair in the mirror.

"Who is the girl Brian is talking to" Freddie mouthed to Roger, he did not want them to hear him and had honestly no idea how loud he was being at any given moment.

"Oh come on Freddie you know I can't read your lips" Roger retorted, a smile at the edge of his mouth. Freddie just rolled his eyes and walked over to him, any thoughts of Debbie temporarily disappearing from his concerns.

"Brian's childhood friend, she moved in primary school and they haven't seen each other since" John piped in, a little offended that Freddie went to Roger before him.

"Are she and Brian..." Freddie trailed off, trying to look out the window without being seen, when instead he caught a glimpse of two other girls, holding hands, he smiled softly.

"I just told you, they haven't seen each other since primary school Fred, no one was sleeping around in primary school, ya fool" Freddie rolled his eyes, secretly embarrassed at the mistake. "Maybe you weren't sleeping around Deaky, but I was" he winked, saving himself from any further questions when John rolled his eyes.

There was a knock on the door.

Freddie shot Roger a glance, who shot John a glance, who looked out the window.

"It's the girl" John mouthed.

Sometimes, Freddie really didn't know what took him over. He tied up his robe, for the most part, took a deep breath, and opened the door.

"Bri" he said, holding eye contact with Katy whilst drawing the attention of Brian, who was still talking to Jo and Michelle, more Jo, about the embarrassing things Katy liked to do (such as being irrationally scared of elevators, and lack of knowledge when it came to rock and roll) whose face quickly turned into a mixture of anger and confusion when he saw Freddie talking to his friend.

"Who is this beautiful pixie? Can I keep her?" he winked. John was the one to laugh from inside this time, Freddie sure could act. Katy blushed, even harder after she heard Jo scream

"That's Katy! She loves your style!" and then shoot her a thumbs up, Katy's eyes widened. She was obviously angry that Jo had exposed her like that, but she couldn't deny it, his fashion sense was something else.

"Well Kate, it's a pleasure to meet you" he took her hand in his and kissed it, she admired his black nail polish. "And, I call this look" he referred to his maroon silk robe "my birthday suit, I can show you the whole thing sometime if you'd like"

"Freddie I swear I will hit you right now I don't care if we have to cancel the show"

"Don't worry Bri, I'm only teasing" he matched Katy's eyes again and winked.

"I like to call him Galileo" the first words Katy could muster up the courage to say to who felt like a god in front of her.

Brian just sighed and walked over.

"Katy likes to think she's clever, Galileo was the astronomer who discovered Jupiter's moons-" Brian shot her a fake annoyed look, he secretly quite liked the nickname but if he told her that, she'd stop.

"Oh no, don't worry, I get it, it's because you were going to be a nerd before I saved that arse" Freddie interrupted, earning a laugh from Katy (what he wanted) and a glare from Brian (a problem he will have to deal with later).

"Anyways" Freddie continued, smiling at his success, "why'd you knock? Galileo's out here talking to...." it was clear he wanted an introduction, but Michelle and Jo were caught up in their own conversation and couldn't hear him. "My friends, Jo and Michelle" Katy smiled, happy to see Jo happy.

"I knocked, because I accidentally overheard that you couldn't find your makeup" she started

"Don't worry about it, if you're near Freddie you might find yourself accidentally hearing a lot of things" Brian interrupted, he was the one smiling this time, and Freddie glared before realizing what she had just said to him.

"You have makeup?" he asked, hopeful, and surprised by the kindness and accepting nature of this practical stranger, but anyone who Brian loved, must be good, Freddie rationalized.

She nodded, "I did Michelle's on the way here" pointing to her, before actually looking over to see her and Jo holding hands. Katy and Freddie both stayed silent for a second. Caught up in their own thoughts.

"Well, dear" Freddie finally coughed "if you wouldn't mind me borrowing it, Debbie - our makeup artist - is an absolute bore, nothing like you darling, and she's also very late" Katy didn't know what to do with all of this flirtation, she herself had never been so entranced by a boy and he was actually receptive to it.

She couldn't help but watch him apply the dark shadow to his water line and eyelids, she had made her way fully inside the van by now, and looked around. It was nothing too fancy at all, if anything, it needed a good wash. There was a broken beer bottle on the floor that John, Brian's friend and bassist was currently cleaning up, and Roger made his way outside to talk to an internally freaking out Jo.

When she looked back to Freddie he was already staring at her.

"Did you design that dress?" He asked, his gaze suddenly making her nervous.

"I did, the first attempt took me all night and was a slightly different pattern but my parents threw that one out, they aren't the biggest patrons of my art. This one isn't as nice but I-"

"You look absolutely stunning, I meant it when I said like a pixie, some woodland fairy, that is what you are" Katy blushed, she appreciated his odd compliment.

"Freddie you better not be high right now, we've got a show to play in - shit in ten bloody minutes" John suddenly realized the time and hurriedly began to gather his things.

"Don't worry darling, we are performers, they can wait a minute, maybe they'll get all hot and heavy. Are you watching tonight?" he spoke from John to Katy, while having his back to them, watching through the mirror as he tried to multi task by also changing into his leather outfit, makeup finished and looking lovely. Katy tried her best not to stare but found it hard, she almost wanted to reply with "I'm watching right now" but she lacked the witty confidence she so admired in the man in front of her.

"Of course, I'm excited to see Brian" she decided to say instead, feeding into the game it was clear that Freddie liked to play.

"And are you excited to see me?" he turned around, locking eyes with her, dressed to a tee.

"I just met you" 

CHAPTER TWO

AN: Hi guys!! Thank you so much for reading so far! I have pre written the next few chapters so they will be up soon! Don't forget to like if you enjoyed it, I am so excited to be writing this fic. ~June :)