#the most wholesome and funny moment ever

[elpuppies]

the fact that Anto APOLOGIZED to Alvaro after scoring that unreal goal because it was supposed to be a cross to him I cannot with him

[cerastes]

I still think it's really cool how Amuro starts as the shittiest pilot alive (because he's a 15-year old) that only gets carried because he's in the biggest, fattest stat stick in-universe at the time (a few retroactive additions made in the future notwithstanding), enough that even its crappy vulcan guns are tearing Zaku IIs apart, and when he starts getting a bit too cocky, Char and Ramba Ral show up in objectively inferior pieces of junk and absolutely deliver his pizza, they just drag his face across every available surface in Planet Earth like he's a Yakuza mook, all because they are simply that much better at piloting, and the thing is, Amuro takes that very seriously.

He goes from shitass kid in an unfortunate situation that doesn't want to get in the robot to the most unwell child soldier in the war, which is really saying something, but most importantly, becomes so good at piloting the Gundam that the Gundam physically cannot handle Amuro's piloting. They need to apply "Magnetic Coating" to its joints so they don't fucking snap away from the main frame because Amuro, one, moves too damn well but also in too extreme a way for the frame to handle it, two, despite being equipped with two sabers, a shield, a beam rifle and vulcan guns, Amuro is a stern believer in introducing most everyone in thagomizer range to his Rated Z for Zeon hands, the single most official pair of hands in the business, tax free. He KEEP going Ip Man on these dudes, he does NOT need to do a Jamestown on these mother fuckers but he INSISTS. Somehow even the Gundam Hammer, which is a giant Hannah Barbera cartoon flail-- Ok, look at this thing, words do not do it justice

Even this god damn Tom and Jerry prop is less savage that whatever Amuro decides to do the moment he's done throwing his shield to get a free kill on someone and it officially becomes bed time forever for the unfortunate sap at the business end of his ten-finger weapons of mass destruction.

The RX-78-2, "Gundam" for its friends and family, even has a top of the line cutting edge Learning Computer that 'learns' alongside the pilot and their habits. This data extracted from it was so absolutely fucked up that it completely revolutionized Mobile Suit combat afterwards, which is a wholesome thing to think about when The Best Combat Data Ever came from a really angry, really stressed 15 year old that doesn't even like piloting. He was 15! He made Haro with his own hands! Amuro literally just wanted to make funny cute spherical robofriends! Amuro was out there trying to make Kirby real, but fate had other plans for him. His cloned brain put in a pilot seat is one of the setting's strongest 'pilots'.

They made fucking Shadow the Hedgehog with his brain, god damn.

By the end, Zeon is rolling out Gelgoogs out of its mass production lines. These things are in the Gundam's ballpark in terms of overall specs (or "power level"). Amuro is bodying them as if they were episode 1 Zaku IIs.

AND THEN HE GETS FUCKING PSYCHIC SPACE POWERS. Not that he needed them, he bodied a couple Space Psychics without any of those powers before awakening to them. But heaven's most violent child was not done evolving, whether he liked it or not.

Char bodied him in a souped up Zaku II at the start, a machine objectively inferior to the Gundam. Amuro more or less one-sidedly beats the shit out of Char when he's in a custom Commander-type Gelgoog that you could consider to be equal spec-wise to the Gundam. Amuro is the embodiment of Finding Out. He is Consequences. You tell him he better make it hurt, better make it count, better kill you in one shot, buddy, he needs half a fucking shot. The complete transformation. One could consider the central 75% of the show as long drawn out training montage turning a kid into the Geese Howard of giant robots.

[eveningdawn222]

something about how "wholesome" batfam aus where jason and bruce have a good relationship inherently require jason to be portrayed as overreacting and hysterical when he returns. something about how the lazarus pit madness trope gives people an excuse to make this palatable. of course he wasn't in his right mind when he did those things, but he's all better now :) it's so silly how angry he was :)

something about how jason has to grovel for forgiveness at tims feet "oh im sooo sorry for trying to kill you (lmao) i was sooo crazy" and tim can then be magnanimous and forgive him because he wasn't in the right state of mind. tim is such a vulnerable little kid (at most 2 years younger than jason) and jason is a grown ass man (was in a comatose state for a couple of those years but who cares) so obviously tim is gonna be soooo traumatized and he's gonna flinch when the big bad man comes near him :( he's a badass vigilante who is smarter and better than everyone but he's also a traumatized little baby who everyone needs to be super nice to :(

something about how tim gets to be a kid, how tim gets to be a victim, how tim gets an apology and groveling and guilt and jason gets -

what? bruce telling him he loved him? a hug and a moment of vulnerability and jason having to split himself open to be dissected by the whole family. jason having to laugh at jokes about his death, jason having to be the one to reach out and admit he was wrong and crazy and totally out of his mind, while bruce can just grunt and give him a hug.

people want bruce to be a good dad because it doesn't feel good for him to be abusive. but by shoving him into these roles, jason's own story becomes unmoored. what would jason have to be angry about? bruce is trying his best! jason is being unreasonable, he's destroying this family, he just needs to realize that while bruce isn't always perfect, he's in the right and jason just needs to -

isn't it funny? how it's never your fathers fault? how it's always on the child when the relationship sours? isn't it funny, how you can slit your child's throat, and it'll be okay after you apologize?

something about how jason todd is a woman and a child and a victim and a son and a brother and a monster.

something about how the only thing jason todd ever did right was die. and how much it must fucking hurt to sit at a dinner table and laugh when someone makes a joke about it.

[raticalshoez]

Funny observations (to me) that I noticed regarding the Life Series

Skizz is a naturally kind, trusting person who has faith in people, but doesn't ever let anyone treat him as a doormat or a pushover. Tango on the other hand is not a very trusting person who can easily pick out suspicious people, and is constantly on edge about who to trust, yet somehow is more likely to be a doormat or pushover than Skizz is???

Lizzie is the least whimsical woman (or rather, feminine presenting person) on this server. You may think that goes to Cleo for their sorta realist mindset and fear mongering status, or like Pearl because of her incredibly depressing lore, or Gem because she can be insane sometimes, but no it's Lizzie. All of them love cute things, but I think the other three fawn over cute things in endearing ways while Lizzie expresses her love very blunt and dry. In the best way possible, she is like the server's cranky old woman to me. Does anyone see my vision or do I sound insane.

People do not talk about or write enough about Jimmy's habit of talking real big and threatening things and sizing himself up to only immediately shoot himself down and run off terrified when challenged by something a bit too threatening or a bit too much for him to handle. It is one of my favorite character defining mannerisms of Jimmy because it's so funny to me. I love wholesome, golden retriever man, but he is also this and I don't see it nearly enough

In Secret Life, when Gem was giving Etho flack for not attacking Cleo during the boogeypocalypse, Bdubs immediately jumps in to defend him by saying "Well, I can't help but notice Scott's not dead yet either, Gem!" Like. Just a moment ago you were scolding him too. He cannot let Etho be in a negative situation for even one second....please get a grip girl he ain't devoted to you rn......you don't have to all that for him...

Etho gets called washed up the most in Limited Life and yet that is the season where he placed the highest and I think that is hilarious

[goldsbitch]

Hello hello! I am still absolutely obsessed with the "Fire" fic you wrote. You are such a talented writer omg, the storytelling, the humour, everything!

So I thought, I have an idea for a funny fic and I'm just gonna send it in LOL I remember Lando saying in an interview that he's really scared when he's the passenger. So what if his GF is speeding all the time and Lando is just internally freaking out and sweating while trying to keep his cool next to her?

Just an idea, if you don't wanna write it that's fine too (:

omg omg omg thank you so much! i'm blushing and i'm scared - hopefully you'll like this one! i added a detail that might be little over the top - but who knows? not me anymore.

I'll drive

"You have a car?!" Lando uttered, forgetting any table manners, the food he had been chewing nearly falling out of his mouth.

Y/N was dead silent, the look on her face strongly resembling a child who lied about cleaning their room and just blushed every toy under their bed.

Her boyfriend gave her a cheeky questioning look, and when it finally set in - the fact she had been hiding the existence of her car from him - he was truly stunned and somewhat amused.

"So, wait. You know how to drive?! Why am I always taking you places?" he asked rhetorically, never actually being bothered by that, but still.

"I don't know how to drive-" she tried before getting interrupted by her father.

"Of course she does, I taught her myself," the jolly man said and patted her on her back with a proud smile. Y/N's face got washed with crocked smile, as if she swallowed something truly detestable.

"No, I do not know how to drive-"

"Nonsense, she's alway been so hard on herself," he father continued. Y/N just sighed.

The young couple came to visit her hometown for the first time. It was lot of reminescing of old times and her school days - a context that Lando very much appreaciated. He had met her as a grown up woman, but that weekend, he witnessed many amusing moments and heard lots of stories that only childhood small towns hold. What did he love the most about this experience? The fact there was nothing for her to do to stop it, no matter how much she frowned. Influx of surprising moments, but this discovery topping all of them.

She saw Lando's perplexed face and tried to save the situation. "I never lied to you, technically you never asked...I just figured you like driving so much, why bother, especially if I am so bad at it..."

Lando was not having it. "Oh, you're not getting easily out of this one," he replied, biting his lower lip, actively having to remind himself of the fact her family was right there. There was something innately attractive about her being so raw and pushed into a corner. Just pure cuteness. "I'm sure you're not half as bad as majority of the people out there," he said, new plans forming in his head. "I think you and I should take her for a spin," he said, referring to the car, and hid his smile behind a glass. Her eyes were piercing his with an energy so intense, it was electrifying.

"No, Lando, I am not driving while you're in the same car," she stated firmly, not breaking the eye contact.

"Come one, sweetheart, it'll be fun," he said, honey dripping out of his mouth.

"It will be anything but that," she said, but Lando ignored that, turning into her father for more information.

"So what kind of a car it?"

The rest of the conversation continued in description of a car Y/N herself could only describe as red, her father telling a story about how he got it for his daughter and how she actually barely ever drove it, which apparently broke his heart.

//

Let's not forget, this was Lando - of course he had ulterior motives. While it was great, spending few wholesome days in the company of his girlfriends family, his frustration grew, because for some reason, she refused to have any intimate activities in her family's house. Why, he had no idea. But of course, he respected that.

She never mentioned anything about not having some nice outdoor sex in a car. He wanted to see her drive and also ride. His perfect afternoon.

Lando is not the best of passengers, often uneasy about the common mistakes casual drivers made. Taking over the wheel is a natural thing for him to do. But, this was an exception he was excited to make - how bad could it be, right? He learned the hard way not to ask that question again.

//

"You sure you don't want to switch places?" she asked, once again, doing everything she could to get out of this.

"Nope babe, passenger seat is the vibe for me today," he smirked, making himself overly comfortable sitting next to her.

She raised her eyebrows. "Here goes nothing, I guess," she murmured and put the keys into ignition.

Lando found it amusing, seeing her so hyper-focused, as if she was launching a rocket ship. To be fair, it was a manual car - so it was close.

Three deep breaths - I fucking hate this, she thought, turned the key and released the clutch. When the car immediately jumped, Lando regretted sitting in his usual obscure way, his head hitting the door with quite a loud bump.

"Told ya," she said and started the car again. No matter how much she tried, she couldn't possibly sell her mistake as an intention.

"You released the clutch too soon," he said while assessing the bump forming on his head.

"Do not give me advice when I drive, makes me angry," she announced and this time actually managed to start the car in a semi-ok way.

Lando watched his bubbly, happy-go-lucky, girlfriend turn into a monster and there was nothing for him to do to stop it.

Everything was somewhat fine when they were still on the quiet roads surrounding her neighborhood. She stopped on the way to the main road, watching two cars that were comically far away and letting them pass. They didn't have to say anything, both knew what the other one was thinking. Y/N knew there was plenty of time for her to join the road before those cars, but the lack of trust in her own abilities was making her wait stubbornly. Lando watched the scenery, amused and starting to understand that in this relationship, his place as the driver was more than secure. She didn't want to be in this position, in fact she was increasingly more mad, that Lando and her father teamed up on her. But since she was where fate got her, she was absolutely not accepting Lando smirking at her.

"I know what you think, we have plenty of time, so I will not be doing some stupid moves to get us both killed," she said and gripped the steering wheel even more.

To prove his point, Lando leaned over her and squirted his eyes and watched the slowly approaching cars. He gave her a sarcastic nod. She rolled her eyes.

"I'm joking, I'm joking," he said, putting his hands in defense.

"You better be, otherwise I'll just yeet us into the ditch."

"Feisty..."

And that was when the line got crossed.

"Fine!" she said, having no control over her emotions, and pressed the gas with new found energy. She turned, almost into a drift, and joined the main road, nearly having the two cars crash into her.

Lando gripped the handle, not expecting her to speed so much. His eyes went wide with realizations - she was the kind of driver operating on emotions. Had this been a racing track and an F1 car, he'd be having more fun, knowing the cars were epitome of safety. He was not so sure about this vehicle.

She had the "Tsunoda" energy and absolute lack of skill to go about it. Weaving, wrong gear almost constantly and not bothered by the sound her car was making.

"You're driving quite close to the lane, baby," he commented, getting more and more worried about their safety.

"Shut up, don't be all smart about it," she said, lips locked in a line. She was focused - not that it helped.

Another hard turn where she missed the right moment to go into it. Lando took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a second, trying to stay calm.

After few hundred metres, he couldn't take it again.

"I think you're way over the speeding limit," he mentioned.

"That's not what this says," he nodded to her speedometer. Lando leaned over and had to laugh.

"Yeah, that's definitely not correct. Honey, I'm sorry, but the lane - you are too close to it," he said in the calmest tone he could gather.

"My brain does not work like that, I see it more in an abstract way..."

His eyes nearly popped out. "You see the road in an abstract way? Oh dear god."

She sighed, not understanding what was the big deal was. "No like, it's a concept. It's not real, if there is nobody on the road, you can be anywhere."

"I'm pretty sure that's not the case, sweetheart," he said and thought for himself that it could be the case if she knew how to drive, but not like that. "Change the gear, you're burning your clutch."

She slapped the steering wheel. "I. Do not. Accept. Advice. At the moment. Thank you!" she said slowly before going on a rampage. "We both know you're exceptionally good at this, it was your idea, I tried to stop you, so now face the situation and do not tell me what to do because I might panic even more!"

"Ok, ok, calm down," he said, putting his hands up in defense and turning his head away to avoid watching her inventing a new way how to turn the steering wheel.

This sent her over the edge, truly giving up on any rules. She was mad, scared, uncomfortable and kind of hungry to be honest.

Lando stayed silent, worried for his life, regretting his decision and making a mental note to listen to her if she says she can't do something - if they survive this.

A huge bump and a loud noise. She barely managed to keep the car on the road.

"What is that?" she screamed, not knowing what to do.

"Front left tire puncture, retire the car! I mean, shit, stop, over there," he gestured, to the sideline of the road.

//

"Ok, so what now?" she said once it seemed like a decent amount of time for him to stop observing the wheel.

"It's just the tire, I'm sure you've got a spare at the back, right?" he asked and like the gentleman he was, got up and looked in the back for a replacement. When he got it out, he proudly put it in front of her, considering his part of the job done. She stared at him, not moving. "There you go," he said, encouraging her. "They taught you how to do this at driving school."

"Um, yeah. I missed that lesson. Can you do it?"

"How could you miss that lesson?" he asked in desperation. Both of them stood there, waiting for the other to take the lead. It was very unusual for Y/N to see him this passive around a car. "Come on, you must have had a question about this on your test," he pleaded.

And then it clicked. "Lando?" she asked, having a very strange feeling about his behavior. "Do you know how to change a tire?"

He stayed silent, pretending to ignore her question. Y/N's eyes went wide. "Oh my god, you don't know how to change a tire?!" she asked once again, unable to believe that could even be the case. "Isn't that like half of your job?"

"Well no, actually, my job is to drive. There is a whole team dedicated for changing my tires," he said matter-o-factly.

"You're a racing driver. Spend more time in a car than in a bed. And you don't know how to change a tire," she stated and started to laugh. "That's so rich."

He let out a heavy sigh. "I've never actually done it myself. Plus these are normal tires, different system."

"Oh my god," she said, unable to process.

The way how much this whole thing has backfired had Lando stuck. He was suppose to be engaging in inappropriate activities with his girlfriend at this moment. In his understanding of that, it did not include getting his phone out and searching for an online tutorial for bloody tire change. But, there he was. Y/N was suddenly having so much fun, coming off a high that was the adrenaline her body produced during driving. She was free and driving was impossible now. Bliss. In her opinion, this was all Lando's fault - she told him she couldn't drive. Payback time - hopefully Oscar would pick up.

She was dialing her phone, while he was trying to understand how to go about this.

Yes, he picked up! "Hi, this is Y/N," she said in a very serious tone. "Who are you calling?" Lando mouthed, his biggest worry that she dialed up her father and he is now going to have a reputation until the end of time. "Help," she mouthed back silently.

"Hi Y/N," was Oscar's response, the driver being somewhat confused as to why she was calling him. "What's up?"

"Glad you ask. Me and my boyfriend got into a serious situation."

"You and Lando?"

Lando frowned. "Are you calling assistance? We don't need them..."

She ignored him."Yes, I was forced to drive-"

"He let you drive?"

"Forced-"

"What kind of assistance is it?" Lando asked, doubting the whole phone call.

Y/N continued without pausing. "And we managed to get a flat tire, which I don't know how to fix and to surprise of the whole universe, he can't fix as well."

There was only laughter on the other end of the call.

"Y/N, who are you calling?"

Y/N pretended not the hear Lando. "Do you know how to change a tire?"

Oscar was more than amused, knowing he just gained a wild card to use on Lando anytime he would want. "Yes, of course I do. Put me on Facetime with him."

Y/N smirked at her boyfriend, who was still confused and with sparkles in her eyes handed him her phone.

"Oscar says hi!"

Lando blinked, several times. "What? No!...Shit. Hey Oscar," he waved at his teammate awkwardly.

"I have been summoned," Oscar announced, finding this all very amusing.

"Yes," Lando replied, defeated.

Oscar did not wait and took the situation in charge. "First step to do is make yourself seen, guys. You got a triangle?"

"Where's the bloody bucket hat when you need it the most..." Y/N mumbled, having Lando roll his eyes in reaction.

"I'll go and find it and you guys figure this out, ok?" she said handing over the phone to Lando and giving him a little peck on the cheek.

"I hate you," he said with a smile.

"I hate you more," she replied and skipped over to the trunk.

//

After series of creative curse words, one pair of ruined jeans and a celebratory high five, the pair stood once again in front of her car, staring at each other.

"I guess I'll drive us back," Lando decided loudly and waited for her approval.

"Agree. Let's not disturb the gods anymore. You're such a bad passenger princess anyway."

The past hour was filled with lot of conflicting emotions, but the only one that stayed was the love the two shared just by looking at each other.

"I'm sorry I forced you into this," Lando apologized softly. "It was not fair. I see that now."

Her lips turned into a weak smile. "Thank you. And sorry for calling Oscar. I'm sure he won't let you forget this."

He saw right through her. "No, you're not sorry about that - I can see the devil in your eyes."

She bit her tongue. "Yup."

It was hard for Lando not to kiss her in that moment. It was impossible for her to resist.

[moonstruckme]

It's me once again! Bothering you twice in a day, I'm annoying like that, ha just kidding. But yes James is soooo wholesome, it's crazy how he became my favorite boy. So Mae, I suppose you are super busy because being such amazing writer is no easy job when you have requests coming all the time but, if you have the time, whenever that is, could you write something about James? Like James being so wholesome, the best boyfriend, the fluffiest thing you can think of, maybe something with words or affirmation and kisses and hugs and just very lovely things, feel like I need that. If you can of course.

Hope you are having a very cool weekend and my username is basically my favorite colors and it has something to do with Van Gogh and my favorite singer but this kid knows something, haha it's so funny, kind of serendipitous if you ask me :) love that. Well, I'm going to set you free, read you soon.

P.S. Sorry this was so loonng

Hi lovely, thanks for requesting!! Sorry this took so long lol, I had to wait until I had an idea that wasn't already in my requests but I appreciate your patience! This is perhaps more hurt/comfort than straight fluff lol, but he is the most wholesome ever <3

cw: concussion

James Potter x fem!reader ♡ 603 words

James’ hand is especially gentle as he strokes over your hair. Your nose dents into his thigh, and his jeans are coarse and scratchy but the slight pressure is nice. 

“Still dizzy?” he asks, carefully quiet. 

“A little.” Your own voice is thin, fraught. “Not as bad.” 

He sighs, and you feel too weird to decipher whether it’s in relief or dismay. “I’m sorry, angel.” He lifts one of your hands to his mouth, kissing the side. “Is it hurting in any one place?” 

“It’s my whole face. But most in my forehead.” 

James’ touch is featherlight, ghosting over the spot where you’d smacked your head on the stairs. “Here?” 

“Mhm.” 

He makes a worried humming sound in response. You sit in silence for some time, and it’s not uncomfortable, but nothing is comfortable for you right now. You feel terrible, unlike yourself and unsettled because of that and also weepy but not as much as you are embarrassed. And dwelling upon any of this for too long makes your head spin worse. You don’t think you’re dying though it feels like you might be. 

The warm bead rolling down your nose brings you to the realization that you’re crying. James’ coo follows a moment later, and his hand splays protectively atop your head. 

“You’re okay, sweetheart. Do you feel alright to sit up?” 

“Okay,” you mumble. 

He does the work for you, though it’s hard to keep track of the movements. One second your head is on his lap and the next you’re propped against his chest, one muscled arm supporting your back while James rests his lips against your forehead. 

“You’re okay,” he promises. “You’re okay, I’ve got you.” 

“I don’t really feel like going to dinner anymore,” you admit, tasting salt as a tear finds its way into your mouth. 

“Oh,” James lifts his lips to look you in the eyes, “honey, I didn’t expect you to. I’m going to call Remus and cancel in a minute, okay?” He brushes a lock of hair away from your face with his pinkie finger, stroking a sweet line down your cheek. “If you go anywhere, it should probably be to the doctor.” 

“No.” You close your eyes, too upset to care about the low whine that escapes you. “What’re they gonna do?” 

“I don’t know, baby.” James traces the same line again. “They might want to do an MRI or something. I’ve had a concussion before, they’re serious business.” 

You sigh, leaning your head on his shoulder. The material of his jumper is soft beneath your cheek. “I can’t think about it right now.” 

There’s a brief pause. 

“Okay. Okay, we can talk about it tomorrow, if it’s still bad then.” 

“I’m sorry.” 

“You don’t need to be sorry.” James’ arm wraps around your middle, squeezing lightly in a gentle sort of hug. You think that he’s being very careful with you, which you appreciate. You don’t imagine you could handle much more sensation at the moment. “I know it sucks, angel, and you’re handling it so well. We’re gonna do our best to get you feeling better. I love you so much, you know?” 

You feel like you might cry again. You don’t think you have the energy to stop yourself. “I know,” you tell him. “I love you so much, too.” 

“Heaps and heaps.” He gives you another little squeeze, his ability to repress his affection tenuous at best. “Probably the most anyone has ever loved anyone, if we’re being honest.” 

“James.” 

“Yeah?”

“I can’t do that kind of math right now. I love you a lot, okay?” 

“Okay. Same here.”

[sungiescheotluv]

am i the asshole? ⭑.ᐟ lee jeno

pairing: lee jeno x gender neutral reader

word count: 2.1k

tags/warnings: fluff, meet not-so-cute turned cute, (excessive) swearing, crack (if you squint - or read any of my fics really 😭)

summary: things are looking up for you - a promotion at work propels you into a new, more extravagant apartment that has all you need and more. too bad you forget to look down.

notes: hi hi, i'm back with a new fic! it's been really fun to crank out all these fics in such a short amount of time :) i usually spend a stupid amount of hours mulling over word choice and reading too much into things, which i've tried to abandon with this blog and just write whatever inspires me and makes me laugh honestly. i'm not sure if this is funny for you guys, but i enjoyed the care-free time i had writing this and hope you enjoy it the same reading it! wishing you all the best and thank you, THANK YOU for all the love on my fics! it means so so much to me 🥹💗

also, this fic wouldn't exist this prompt list from @corvase so big big thank you to them! much love! <3

If there is one word to describe Jeno, it’s doting. 

Ever since the moment you two met, you’ve been living a life of luxury. Not necessarily in terms of monetary means (except for the very pretty promise ring Jeno got you a few months back), but in more valuable, sentimental places. Someone by your side that treasures the ground you walk on, someone that makes the effort whoever big or small, someone who’s totally and utterly obsessed with you. For so long, you thought you had your head in the clouds, imagining such a love as an abstract, fictional thing. Like it could never materialise beyond the limits of your mind and yet, there it is. Three years ago, the love you’d wished for on many stars, many birthday candles - right in front of you. 

You meet in a rather…unconventional way. Nothing shady or anything, but it’s a bit of a blunder in comparison with the wholesomeness of your relationship. You’d just moved into your new apartment building, your new promotion uplifting you as the future brims bright. You’d seen it in person before getting the keys and your jaw dropped every time. Admittedly, the office assisted with most of the expenses to keep you in close vicinity of the main building, explaining the lavish skyscraper of a building. Marble floors, polished elevators, key-pad locks. To you, someone who didn’t come from much, this was the high life. A merit your family let you know you deserved for all your efforts over the years, whether it was in academic ventures or familial affairs. Either way, as you are driving through the front gate, the security guard tipping his hat at you, you’re beaming with glee - nothing, and you mean absolutely nothing, could ruin your day. 

Except this.

For someone so accommodating, you lacked understanding (and patience) for what you, in a flare of anger, called ‘stupidity.’ Unfortunately for you, this is one of those moments. Pulling up to your assigned parking space (underground, might you add), your eyebrows furrow at the sight before you. There’s a car in front of you making an awkward turn, almost as if they don’t know where they’re going. Maybe they’re new like you, you reason. Your understanding drains from there, as the car goes back and forth, turning its wheels and frankly, looking like a hot mess. You try not to be an asshole, because drivers deserve some grace, especially Learners judging by the large ‘L’ on the back of their car, but just as you’re about to offer some help, you squeal.

The learner attempts to manoeuvre out the tight space it’s wedged itself into, having to reverse generously due to the sheer size of the car and in doing so, it nearly rear-ends you. If you hadn’t had the sense to put more distance between the two of you, the front of your car would’ve been mangled. This time, you honk, a slam of the hand on the steering wheel as you yell, “The fuck are you doing!”

The driver offers an apologetic hand out their window, somehow managing to squeeze into the parking spot they’d been trying very hard to get into. As grateful as you are for the stupid ordeal to be over, a pout forms on your lips as you squint at the parking spot the driver’s parked into. 

Your parking spot.

You’re out of your car before your brain registers, the slam of the car door accompanying the echo of your loud voice as you say, “That’s my parking space.” 

The driver hoops out of their car, a large grey hoodie shrouding their face as they step into view. Under the fluorescent lights of the barren car park, the stranger reveals their face, shadows enveloping the sharp edges of his high cheekbones and jawline. You nearly lurch back, because what the hell? Why is the driver you’d nearly had an aneurysm over unbelievably hot? Handsome? Cute?

At this point, you’d throw a whole dictionary full of words to describe how attractive he is, his pink lips folding into an apologetic grin, bowing to you deeply. “Is your car ok? I’m so sorry. It’s my first time driving this big ole thing - it’s the only car I could fit all my belongings in.”

Then, you see it. Items, belongings cluttering the pick-up truck, and if you really look, you’re pretty sure a pillow’s obstructing his sight from his rearview mirror. 

You exhale, a wave of sympathy drowning the fires of your annoyance. “It's fine, thanks. Just a word of advice, you shouldn’t be driving with something blocking your rearview mirror.”

Why did you have to tell him this? If he's a learner, surely he 1) knew this and 2) had someone in the car with him.

Just then, the passenger front seat opens, another figure in an oversized black hoodie coming round the vehicle. Were they-?

“Jeno, you forgot your dog treats in the-” the passenger cuts themselves off at your presence, lowering their hood to reveal another handsome face. What is this? A traveling circus of hotties? How many more were hidden in there? “Oh, hottie alert.”

Instantly no. 

In the face of a man also sculpted by the Gods, with his big brown eyes and irresistible smile, you scowl. Maybe even vomit a little in your mouth because did he just say ‘hottie alert’ about you…in front of you? 

Nevermind you calling him that first.

“You’ll have to excuse him,” the stranger - Jeno, you’re assuming - looks even more embarrassed, shuffling to shield the glaring ogling his friend does. “He’s got no filter. No sense either, now that I think about it.”

“Since when did the samoyed become the owner?” you make out his friend say, in a headlock that he forces himself out of with a bite through Jeno’s sleeve. 

Samoyed? Owner?

The longer you watch their bickering, the more confused and honestly, more annoyed you grow. A promotion and new apartment, what is meant to be an upgrade from your previously cramped but friendly neighbourhood, only to find yourself caught in the middle of a quarrel. With some themes of petplay, too, you weren’t sure.

All you know is that you’ve got a long day ahead of you, and they’re prolonging it by snatching your parking space. 

“Sorry to interrupt but,” their heads turn at the sound of your voice, having the decency to look embarrassed as you continue. “You’re parked in my space. I’m D7. So, in case there’s been a mix-up-”

“Thing is, sweetie,” Jeno’s friend addresses you, the latter hanging his head in shame. “Unfortunately, someone’s parked in our sweet Jeno’s place. We’re on a bit of a tight schedule, and your space was the only one avail-”

A car honk makes you jump, your head on a swivel, mortified to find a car behind yours, luckily trying to exit the underground space.

Now you look like the asshole.

You huff, exhausted already. “I’m gonna let this car through, and we’re going to solve this, alright?” 

They both nod, the enthusiasm that Jeno nods with earning a fond smile from his friend, Jeno’s sleazy partner ruffling his head of long black hair.

In the end, when you’ve circled back, the person parked in Jeno’s space comes out and profusely apologizes for the inconvenience, citing an emergency they had to take care of and since Jeno’s space was free and close to the building, they snagged it. So, you get your parking space back, a small victory. Jeno’s friend, who notices you’re moving in too - Jaemin is his name - offers his help, to which you politely deny, catching the pure apologetic nature in Jeno’s shiny eyes. 

Minor blunder. A small thing in the grand scheme of things, nothing worth losing your mind over.

Except when you’ve managed to heave your first few belongings to your apartment, the door next to yours opens, Jaemin’s bright smile greeting you as he says, “Oh, I’m definitely coming over to yours more often.”

So, yeah. Not that romantic - your first meeting.

Heck, even your second and third meeting isn’t too great because on one exceptional morning where you’re running late, you collide into Jeno on your way out, your possessions and fingernail flying in the air. You’re lucky your nail-bed remains unscathed, but not so lucky the days following that when you’re walking in the open courtyard of your apartment building, out for some fresh air, time to decompress for the mounting work you’re quickly submerging in.

You’ve got your headphones on, noise-cancelling ones you got for Christmas - how nice. What isn’t nice is that you miss the yell behind you, and the strange texture you step onto. Your body freezes, nose twitching from a foul smell that wafts upwards and when you gaze down to your shoe, you find the worst. The absolute worst.

Shit. Huge, putrid clumps of shit.

It’s so shocking that you slip your headphone off down to your neck, deciding between screaming or crying. Your decision is cut off by a familiar voice, yet again so apologetic.

“I forgot her bags upstairs. I didn’t think anyone would…” Jeno cuts himself off, eyebrows pinched together like he may cry. “Can I-can I do anything for you? Wash your shoe? Scream? Disappear into oblivion?”

“All of the above.”

He chuckles, the furry friend he’s accompanied by nudging their wet snout against your hand, smiling at you like there are no thoughts behind their eyes. Your eyes flicker between the dog and Jeno, the white samoyed eerily similar to his owner.

Was this what Jaemin was referring to when you first met?

“Don’t worry about her, she’s harmless,” he comments, the ghost of a grin appearing against his face. “Except when she takes a dump.”

You have to laugh. Otherwise you’ll cry. “Too soon?”

“No, no - I needed that actually,” you sigh after your fit of chuckles. “Today’s been…well, shit.”

“You don’t say,” Jeno muses, handing over the leash his dog is on. “Do you mind?”

You take it without a word, securing his furry friend as he slips off one of his shoes, bending down near the scene of the crime. Without a peep, he cleans around as best as he can, undoing your shoe and casting it aside, slipping his one on your foot.

“Well, I can’t scream because it’s non social hours,” he leads, wrapping your shoe in one of the bags. “And as much as I’d love to disappear into oblivion, I’ve got a shoe to wash.”

He then hesitates, parts his lips like he wants to say something. There’s something adorable about his loss for words, how his gaze is downturned, flicking side to side in indecision. God, all these awful run-ins robbed you of remembering how cute he is. 

“Did you want to come back to mine?” he finally asks, meeting your eyes. “So, we don’t have to drop each other’s shoes off like some fairytale.” 

“It is almost midnight,” your quick wit earns a chuckle from him, eyes moon crescent and you can’t believe your own. How tragically pitiful and handsome he is. “Why not? I’ve got no ball to be at.”

So, instead of spending your night wallowing in the darkness of your apartment, you’re next door, laughing at the failed attempts of Jaemin’s ‘flirting’ Jeno tells you with his samoyed, Ari, cuddled into your side. Once your shoe dries, that’s when you say you’ll leave - what you infamously tell yourself, picking up the bone-dry shoe hours later, belly full of Jeno’s special bowl of noodles and heart full of infatuation for your neighbour. 

Again, not so romantic. But your following run-ins prove to be a turning point, the close relationship you develop unveiling a world of romance you thought were reserved only for movies and books. Somewhere along the line, your elevator talks stretch into rambling dinner dates, rotating between your place and his depending on the meal since Ari once stole a whole steak off your plate once. You take Ari on your nightly walks Jeno accompanies you for, you meet his friends and he meets yours. You make space for each other, carving out time to spend binging the latest season of your favourite dating show or over a bowl of kimchi stew you reward him with for getting the spider out your apartment. 

It’s like your puzzle pieces come together, initially ill-matched but now, the perfect fit for one another. And even if Jaemin jokes you were a bit ‘rough around the edges’ (code for an asshole) when you’d first met, Jeno kisses the denial out of you, making sure you know how much better his (and Ari’s) life is with you in it. 

[becomesylus]

Touched but Untouched

`` obliviousness can be cute when xavier does it, however, it can be aggravating when you want him to do something to you. so you took it upon yourself to do something about it... or so you thought``

xavier x afab!reader (modern au) — 2.4k words

warning/disclaimer: teasing, masturbation, oral fixation, referenced cum eating, open ending

a/n: i hc that xavier is an avid anime watcher... he just does.

minors do not interact. re-read the warnings before reading, as after clicking “keep reading”, i am not responsible for the media you consume.

A game of cat and mouse can be exciting between couples, it can spice it up even for some couples. But, for you and Xavier, the contrary can be said, at least from your end. As much as you find his lack of recognizing social cues endearing, it can be frustrating when you want something out of him, especially when that something revolves around him wanting to go all out on you in a venereal fashion.

Xavier was not at all a bad lover—by the great god is he the most amazing lover, you can confidently say that he is the only male lover you have been with who not only gave you the best orgasms but also awakened new fantasies you never thought you had, on top of the kinks he had fulfilled for you. Unfortunately, however, he did maintain a flaw; you have to be upfront and verbal to get him to have sex with you. You merely thought he was feigning ignorance, you thought he was playing hard to get with you, it was only until he looked at you with a flustered expression that you realized you fucked up.

Thankfully, before you start your panicked frenzy after thinking you've violated your lover, he always reassures you that he is always down to whatever you are into with the softest, gentlest tone with a face cradle and a soft thumb rub on the cheek—of course before he pins your head into the mattress and making you scream from his brutal pounding.

"You just need to be more upfront with me... I'm bad at reading people, y'know?"

He confessed in his typical soft and shy tone, cursed that shy boy duality because you would have never thought that this man would be the cause of you ruining your underwear and sheets while whimpering out his name.

And you are now craving that. It was an innocent invite really, Xavier invited you over in the pretense that you two would catch up on the anime you two have been watching. But he had to open the door and greet you while standing there, black hoodie and sweatpants, looking like the softest, most comfortable, and perfect boyfriend ever, the absolute audacity, and all pure and wholesome intention of this hangout had left out the building of his apartment complex.

Poor Xavier, once again, fell into a trap that you didn't intend to place in the first place. You hoped that he was doing it on purpose so you'd feel less bad to get on his pants, but knowing him, he probably only picked the most comfortable clothes he could sleep in and cuddle with you.

And there you are now; cuddling on the couch while staring blankly into space while your boyfriend is immersed in the sci-fi anime. You were screwed—and wet, to put it bluntly—the moment you stared up at the side profile of Xavier, the colors reflecting on his azure eyes, making them glimmer with glee and anticipation of the exciting media, the TV project the saturated colors of the anime into his pale skin beautifully making him look like an art piece, his tiny dimples indents his cheeks as he giggles at the funny scenes, his perfectly straight nose that was carved from the gods scrunches along with the smile, making it look more beautiful, elegant, and a perfect seat to sit on—

"Babe?"

His honeyed voice interrupted your trance state and made you blink back at him, muttering out a response. You see that the anime has been paused while he looks at you, half-concerned and half-upset.

"You've been staring at me," he said, tilting his head in wonder like a puppy, "I thought you wanted to watch the show with me..."

Fuck, now you feel bad, he is eager to watch something with you and you're over here objectifying him.

"I do, I do, I'm sorry, I just can't help it..." you looked down, almost bashfully, yet you hope this could help Xavier read your mind by your hand stroking his soft silver hair back as you whispered, "you're just too handsome, and my mind is wandering somewhere else..."

"Where would that be?! Want me to—ha..."

Before he could continue spitting out whatever nonsense that could kill the mood, you began stroking in his ears—his erogenous zone—in small, languid motions, making him shudder and expelling a small grunt. His pale skin is later replaced to a flush red face, while his chest raises up and down in pace with his pants.

“(y/n)...” His voice whispered as your fingers roamed from his ears to his jawline to his chin then up to his lips. You got on his lap, while he looked up at you, now both hands holding onto his face, your thumb playing with the bottom of his pink lips. You’re cracking him bit by bit, but you can’t be hasty or else you won’t get the result that you wanted. Lazurite eyes half lidded with desire and urgency, his hands traveled up to your hips, while he looked up at you. 

“You want this, right? I should’ve guessed that you wanted to undress me and fuck me on this couch from the moment you walked in…” His voice rasped with lust, eyes were now blown dark as he pushed himself back, resting his head back on the cushion. His eyes traveled down to your hands on his face, only for him to capture your thumb into his mouth, looking up at you as he began to lightly suck and bite the tip of your digit. Now it was your turn to gasp and shudder at his sudden action.

Fuck, this is much better than what you have envisioned—once again, without intentions, Xavier always exceeds expectation. 

“Hmm, come here,” He muttered erotically as he pulled away your thumb and instead pulled you in to crash his lips into yours. Your mouths open to allow your tongues to entangle each other, leaving you to taste his mint chocolate flavor that coated his—and now your—tongue. You moan against the intimate kiss as your hips begin rolling against his crotch, his hand now gripping your thighs with such vigor. Your hands remain by the sides of his face, one grips his hair, while the other plays with his ear, making him whimper against your lips. He pulls away, making you two catch your breaths, but not for long, as he began gripping your face from your jaw, forcing you to look at him. 

“Since I can’t read social cues like any normal person,” he teasingly hoarse, a smirk started to paint on his face, almost as if he caught on to your act, “I know that mouth can be used for other things aside from criticising me…” he proceeded while he unties the strings of his sweatpants.

Holy shit, you’re wet, you were sure had it not for your jeans, you’d be staining his sweatpants. You didn’t hesitate as you got off of his lap and kneeled in front of him while he completely stripped off his sweatpants, leaving him in his boxers. Even though it was not your first, his imprint always leaves you amazed and drooling for him, the way his cock is begging to be out of the fabric cage makes you eager to have him in your mouth.

As you hastily held the waistline of his boxers, Xavier gripped your wrist as he tsked before he whispered, “Patience, my little star… patience.”

Fucking tease… It aggravated you but you’d lie if you said you hated it though. You huffed while he chuckled as he pushed your hands away, as he slowly stripped off his boxers, finally setting his hard cock free from its restraints. It bounced on his bare stomach where the hoodie has been slightly lifted thanks to that make out session, his pink tip began leaking out precum, essentially calling for it to be loved and cherished by a certain someone’s mouth. You bit your lips as you were met up with his length before looking up at Xavier, expecting any teasing notion from him, but instead, he mimicked your earlier action and began stroking your lips with his thumb before inserting it in your mouth, urging you to suck on it. 

You obliged as your tongue swirled around his finger tip while maintaining eye contact, all the while Xavier wrapped his other hand around his cock and began stroking it in controlled and languid pace, making him sigh a content and pleasurable sound. You never envied anything so bad until you witnessed Xavier’s hand stroking himself, it should’ve been you who pleases him and make him a sighing, breathy mess. Instead, Xavier’s punishing you for your poor judgement on him by forcing you to take his fingers while he stimulates himself in front of you. 

“Hmm, fuck~” Xavier moans as he rolls his neck while he picks up his pace. He was doing it on purpose, despite his quiet demeanor, he is pretty vocal in bed but right now, he was taunting you. He was essentially telling you that he too can make himself feel so good and that to do better than that when HE gives you the chance to do so. You’ve started a cruel game and he, just like every game you two play in, was simply a pro at it. 

Xavier began moving his hand even faster, making let out breathy strings of curse words, the feeling of his cock being stroked and squeezed while watching you silently plead while his finger’s in your mouth was getting too much to bear. He releases his thumb out of your mouth and wraps that same hand around your throat, making you moan and eyes roll back.

“Open up for me…” Xavier spoke through his whimpers as he positioned himself in front of your mouth. You without any argument opened up your mouth, awaiting for what’s to come.

“Oh my fucking—I’m gonna fucking come…” His words were foggy in between the strings of moans and whimpers he was releasing as he strokes even faster, squelching sounds of his cock heightens its volume along with it like an adlib. With a couple of strokes, Xavier’s load releases and lands imperfectly in your lips, making him groan before grunting as more releases. It was a gift that won’t stop coming—literally. Pearly essence coated your lower half of your face, neck, chest and tank top, that you didn’t mind it staining as you were going to steal Xav’s hoodies anyway. But nothing’s more glorious than seeing Xavier’s aftermath as he pants while looking down at you, his hand still wrapped around your throat. He pushes himself forward to you as he whispers against your ears.

“Swallow…”

Once again, you didn’t dare to disobey him and did as he commanded, tasting his salty release that was addicting and irresistible. 

“Good girl,” He leans back and begins to chuckle seductively as he releases your throat and pets your head. While you had your fill, it still wasn’t enough, and Xavier knows this, so he strips off his hoodie and throws it across the living room, leaving him fully bare. He continues to pet your head as he tilts your head in wonder, lust still drawn in his face. He smiles at you darkly, while you gulp down whatever remaining essence that was on your lips—and also of course because of nervousness.

“Still think I can’t read your intentions?” He asks, that menacing smirk still in his face while continuing to stroke your head gently. The juxtaposition leaves you on edge as you simply just looked up at him with apprehension and exhilaration.

“Xavi, baby, I—” Your words were abruptly cut as the hand that was gently holding your head was shoved down to his cock, making you wrap your mouth around it. He moans at the warm feeling of you wrapping around him and you still haven’t begun moving. 

“Fuck, doll, look at what you’ve done to me… you’d have to clean up the mess you’ve created…” He began rambling, your head bobbing along with his words, his hand shoving your head even deeper. Everyday you thank god or whatever entity there is that you don’t have a gag reflex, otherwise you wouldn’t know how to handle your boyfriend’s impressive package. 

“Your mouth… so perfect…”

The sounds that Xavier was producing were godsent, hearing a typically quiet and reserved guy crumbling right beneath your hand—or rather your mouth—making him lose control was a reward in itself and you were winning. You moved in ways you knew you’d elicit more sounds from him, your tongue and hollowed cheeks aided in this session as you licked the salty tip while tightening the space, making him let out the most pathetic whimper. Fuck, you wish you can touch yourself if it not for the jeans you were wearing. 

“S-stop…” Xavier murmured as he begins to pant, indicating that his second release is about to erupt, but you’d pay much mind as you wanted it and more from him. 

“I said stop!” He pulls your head as he grit his teeth at you, that same lust blown eyes is turning more animalistic and threatening. For a moment, you forgot that you were still indebted in your crimes and you were being punished. Your heart sank as he grips your wrist, pulls and pushes you into the mattress underneath him, placing them both on top of your head. Xavier is showing an intimidating side of his and you can’t lie and say that you weren’t leaking in both fear and arousal.

“First, you criticize me, second, you ignore the show I’m oh so excited about and now you’re ignoring my orders… I see I’m being very lenient with my punishment” He scolds, yet his eyes wander down to my body, with one of his hands sneaking from underneath the hem and starts having contact with your skin. His head lowers down to your neck as he begins to kiss and nibble on it. You moan as you feel his bite getting harsher, making him scoff before pulling away. He sees the mark he placed before he coldly looks back at you. 

“You’ll have to repay your crimes… understand?” His words sent shivers down your spine as his fingers underneath your shirt started playing with your soft mounds. 

“Yes, sir,” you uttered in broken terms before moaning as he pinches your nipples while he licks the skin in your collarbone.

God, will this be a long night…

[bicth-and-in-that-order]

Rambling thoughts of various Yuri manga I’ve read

1. Kase-San and Yamada (Morning Glories sequel series) by Hiromi Takashima

notice how Kase’s name is first, which is representative of her being the main one to cause problems in their relationship

If you asked me what my favorite yuri manga was like 2-3 years ago, I’d say Morning Glories and Kase San everytime. Every avid yuri fan has either read or watched Morning Glories because, at the time in 2010, it was groundbreaking, and I stand by the fact that the original series still holds up to this day. It was cute, sweet, wholesome and only had a few obligatory “we love each other but we’re giRLs😳😳😳” moments. Most of all it wasn’t a pseudo-incest-straight-male-porn-pandering-garbage-fest—also known as “Citrus”. Was it cliche at times? Yes, but they all are lol. Did they add to the dumb ass “blonde femme and dark hair masc” trope? Also yes. But it was adorable and it was my first ever yuri so it holds a special place in my heart.

And it SEEMED like it was only going to get better in Kase San and Yamada, the sequel. The girls would be heading to college and the story could theoretically focus on more mature topics while they navigate their new relationship. Keyword: theoretically. Unfortunately, instead of exploring interesting relationship dynamics and storylines, the plot of each story arc boils down to: Kase is insecure because a man breathed next to Yamada or Kase is being completely insensitive to Yamada’s feelings…again…—> ✨miscommunication drama ✨—>big over dramatic apology scene—>boring makeup sex or other romantic gesture.

Literally that’s how every single plotline goes. Kase is so goddamn dumb and insensitive to Yamada’s feelings and Yamada’s a complete doormat who can only stay mad for 0.2 seconds before getting pussy whipped like a spineless ass bitch. And for all that Yamada sacrifices for Kase; her hometown, her dreams, her apartment, what does she get in return from Kase? Oh that’s right; bare minimum romantic gestures and a neglectful partner who can’t even call her “girlfriend” in front of others:

Like I thought we were over this shit. It’s been THREE years of them together, a whole anime production, and god knows how many irl years and we’re going back to “we love each other but we’re giRLs😳😳😳” WHY???

And then Kase later goes onto bet her entire three year relationship over the ugly bitch in the next panel, so now I’m questioning whether or not Kase even loves Yamada with the amount of bullshit she’s put her through. Which COULD be an interesting plot point, but Kase never gets any consequences for her actions and the creator genuinely thinks this is romantic and full of tension so I’m 10000% positive that this arc, just like all the others, will end with some makeup sex and we’ll be right back to step 1. Sigh.

2. Tamen De Gushi by Tan Jiu

Tamen De Gushi’s problems are interesting but it’s NOT because of the Chinese government💀

So today’s dark haired masc and blonde femme of the day are Sun Jing and Qiu Tong, respectively. Their personalities aren’t anything to write home about, if you read ANY high school yuri romance, then you know exactly what happens in this story beat for beat. But, BUT, however derivative it is, I find their dynamic very endearing and down to earth. Idk maybe it’s just the translation, but other yuri stories often have this very inauthentic “anime” vibe to it. Which is to say the characters act very cutesy, overly dramatic, and have this stilted, caricature-esque acting of how the creator thinks teenage girls are supposed act.

However, I’m happy to report that Tamen De Gushi is a breath of fresh air in this regard. The characters and interactions they have are grounded and feel organic, which makes them feel like real people, not aliens pretending to be human. This really elevates the humor in turn, oh did I mention that Tamen De Gushi is super funny? Because Tamen De Gushi is super funny, here’s one of my favorite panels and it’s all because of Sun Jing’s goofy ahh expression:

Like go girl give us nothing

If you’re wondering why I haven’t spoke much about the actual romantic relationship between the girls, that’s because there isn’t one💀 Which, okay, that’s not a fair assessment, they have a ton of romantic tension and they flirt a lot. It’s certainly building to a great romantic relationship, but it can’t quite get there due to legal/political reasons sadly. 😔

Edit: I received new information in regards to what happened to Tamen De Gushi. While I reached my limit for posting pictures, I want to point out that the Chinese government had nothing to do with Tamen De Gushi getting censored, rather it was a dispute between the author and the publishing company. The prior information I received was false and I prob should’ve looked it up more so sorrrry. The fact still remains though that after their big lesbian kiss towards the middle of the story and maybe a few other moments, that’s just kind of it. You’re stuck waiting for something to develop, but nothing really happens. The comic very quickly becomes a collection of slice of life segments and cute pictures that imply a relationship between the girls, but not really ;) ;).  Now things are just kind of left in purgatory for the foreseeable future and, well, that’s Tamen De Gushi y’all.

Compared to Kase San and Yamada, the characters were much better, which is not saying much, but without an actual romantic storyline, there’s just not a lot for me to comment on to be honest. It’s really pretty though, look at this art :

3. Beauty and the Beast Girl by Neji

my personal favorite and the BEST yuri I ever read

So next on the list is Beauty and the Beast Girl (I’m going to abbreviate to BatBG from here on) , which I already spoiled my feelings on the matter so this will basically be me gushing about this story for several paragraphs straight, enjoy.

Contrary to what the title suggests, it really has nothing to do with Beauty and the Beast’s story except in name. The main girls are Lily Blind, who is actually fucking blind 💀 and Heath the monster girl. Already I’m happy because instead of blonde femme and dark hair butch, it’s blonde femme and of-course-you-have-purple-hair-and-pronouns masc. Lol, all jokes aside, Lily, unlike her blonde femme counterparts is quite assertive and voices her opinions all the time. In fact, she’s the one who pushes Heath to be more open and communicate with her rather than the other way around. This is, in part, due to the story BatBG is trying to tell. I say BatBG is in name only to Beauty and the Beast because Lily isn’t trying to find the “beauty” within Heath or learning to love a beast or whatever, she’s fine just the way she is and her love for Heath is unconditional. Plus the only thing beastly about Heath is her appearance…which I’ll harp on later, but her behavior is in no way different from a regular human except in very rare, specific moments.

At its heart, BatBG is a story about forgiveness (the creator literally says as much) , but it’s also about the cycle of violence that results from being outcasted and deprived of love. BatBG is set in a world of humans and monsters, where the monsters are outcasted and either have to stay away from human society like Heath or assimilate themselves by hiding away their monster like traits, which is a really queer narrative on top of an already queer story. I don’t want to go into too much spoilers, but sometime before the beginning of the story, Heath in-directly hurts Lily before they ever meet. However, it’s not about Lily needing to forgive Heath, or trying to get over the pain she inflicted upon her, rather its Heath learning to forgive herself and in effect, learning to love herself as much as Lily loves her.

Another big aspect of BatBG is disabilities, Lily Blind is in fact Blind lol and while there are times she struggles with her blindness, she never views her disability as something she needs to be ashamed of and never, ever, blames Heath for it or holds it against her unlike what many, many, many, many other stories end up doing. Her blindness isn’t treated like a super power either, it’s a legitimate disability. She just accepts that it’s a part of her and goes onto say that if not for her blindness, she would’ve never met the love of her life, which I found to be an incredibly profound thing to say.

Now that I’ve gotten this far, I suppose I can add a bit of a disclaimer. So BatBG is waaaaay more explicit about the physical affection between the girls than in any of the previous stories I talked about. Heath and Lily are constantly kissing on, hugging, and almost always flirting with each other, and make no mistake, these girls do be fucking. The sex scenes are never perverted or gross, but genuinely super sweet and romantic, which makes it way hotter imo (huh imagine that🤔). And aside from being hot, it also serves a purpose! Lily’s pretty damn horny underneath all her nice girl antics and while it’s not a major part of her character, it does give a slight edge to her personality and, most importantly, balances out the dynamic between Heath and Lily. It would’ve been very easy to fall into that boring trope where Heath is aggressively horny and Lily is the submissive blind girl, but by making Lily be the one to initiate the sexual encounters, it not only compliments Heath’s more reserved nature, but breaks the stereotype that people with disabilities are pure precious being who couldn’t possibly have sex, which is ableist af btw. Many people think the existence of any sex scenes at all is superfluous, but in BatBG, it truly elevates the story, the characters, and the romance in ways that wouldn’t be nearly as satisfying without it.

Now, with as much praise I gave BatBG, there is one criticism I have, but it’s a quibble really, and it can be explained in a single image:

There is a dissonance between the story and the art, the story says: “Heath is a big, ugly scary monster”

The art says:

And like yes, it can be argued that Heath is simply regurgitating the things bigoted people have said to her, but at no point in the story is this ever challenged or brought up in any meaningful way. Lily is blind so she doesn’t know what the hell she looks like and the other characters aren’t any help either. It’s not a big deal or anything, it just would’ve elevated the story if Heath was actually kinda ugly/more monstrous and not incredibly beautiful because right now it’s giving skinny girl who calls herself fat all the time, and it’s like, babe, who tf are you fooling? 😭

Other than that, BatBG is incredibly profound despite its premise being so deceptively simple and I love it to pieces so …yeah! READ IT.

4. Superwomen in Love! Honey Trap and Rapid Rabbit by sometime

Well, at least there are no blondes

So imma just abbreviate to SiL btw

Alright, let’s get started. The premise is that a villainess falls for the super hero girl and then that plotline is dropped in about 16 pages. I’m not even joking, the villainess falls for the hero, loses her job as a villain and then joins the hero all in one chapter. The REAL plot is actually about a council of evil alien-humans who want to destroy humanity because of generic super villain reason #434: the leader of the aliens is sad and misunderstood :( I’m not even going to lie, I had 0 interest in “X” (the generic ass name of the main villain) and her band of useless lesbians. They did literally nothing in the story except be a nuisance and contribute to X’s incel breakdown at the end. Their inclusion actively made SiL worse because the story has this weird tonal problem where in one breath the villains are portrayed as complete jokes and then you turn the page and now they’re shooting children like girl what💀 And these useless lesbians hog sooooo much of SiL that desperately needed to be given to Honey trap and Hayate to develop their relationship.

When the story DOES actually focus on Honey Trap and Hayate, it’s pretty good, even cute at times, there just wasn’t enough time given to them to flesh their relationship out. As it stands, Honey Trap and Hayate don’t have much of a dynamic, or personality for that matter. Honey Trap’s main gimmick is that she’s extremely horny for Hayate and delulu:

Aside from that, she’s a great value version of Heath, but even a watered down character is better than, like, nothing. All I really know about Hayate is that she’s nice, heroic, likes wearing tacky clothes and ….that’s it. She loves Honey Trap because…………they fought together a few times so why not🤷‍♀️ I’d say at least that’s better than Tamen De Gushi, but actually it’s not because these grown ass women don’t even kiss , all we get is a love confession and their gremlin love child and that’s supposed to be satisfying I guess.

And the worst part is that SiL has the audacity to pretend the romance was something that it clearly wasn’t:

Girl…yall were “””enemies””” for 10 panels.

Now, it’s stated they have been rivals for a while, but I guess Honey Trap forgot all of that because the moment she sees Hayate’s face, my good sis is pussy whipped for life. And that’s in spite of apparently being the evilest one out of the evil group because Honey Trap has no grudge or baggage toward Hayate. She immediately turns good with no issues and Hayate is only distrustful of Honey Trap for 1 or 2 speech bubbles and then she’s not. Anything else that happened was off screen, which means it didn’t happen. Ironically, the very next entry on this list will do a MUCH better job at an ex-villain love story, but for SiL, there’s just not much going on.

Another reading of this story is to call it a “parody” but…no, it isn’t. SiL isn’t a comedy, yes there are comedic moments that poke fun of the genre, but the rest of the story genuinely wants you to take it seriously. Except it can’t. X and her league of dimwits are boring as piss and they oscillate between Saturday morning cartoon villains and child murderers seemingly on a whim. So I can neither be endeared to them nor take them as a serious threat. Honey Trap and Hayate are there, but I lament on all the potential lost from what could’ve been an amazing relationship.

5. Yamujiburo/Kianamaiart’s Hanamusa webcomic

This one is kind of cheating, but I also don’t care let me talk about hot MILFs💀

So the final entry on this list is a webcomic series by one of my fave artist: kianamaiart! And it’s right here on tumblr so check it out!

I stumbled upon this webcomic a few weeks ago, fell in love and now I want to talk about it. This yuri pair thankfully has no blonde femme in sight and instead features two popular Pokémon characters: Jessie from Team Rocket and Delia Ketchum, Ash Ketchum’s mom. What I love about this ship and the world Kiana creates around them is that it’s a very unconventional pairing. There’s just not many romances where a single mom falls in love with an ex gang member and the best part is, Delia being a mom is a big part of her character and she doesn’t ignore Ash in favor of her new relationship with Jessie. She has time for both and doesn’t prioritize one over the other, which many ppl fail to do even irl so good on you Delia!

Now, as for the romance it self, Jessie and Delia are a unique pair. Jessie’s overconfident, brash, drama queen personality doesn’t automatically put her in the “dominant” role and Delia’s sweet, motherly personality doesn’t automatically put her in the “submissive” role. Their dynamic in the webcomic actually plays out in the reverse, Jessie is the one who gets easily flustered and Delia’s…intense, to say the least:

(But Tbf if Delia looked at me like that I’d be at her beck and call too💀)

This subversion of these tropes creates a fun dynamic for the couple and it’s super adorable to see how their energies bounce off each other in each new situation Kiana puts them in. I also love how both Jessie and Delia inspire each other to live out their dreams and they become better versions of themselves by being together.

And one last thing, I don’t have any smart commentary to go along with this, I just really like this drawing of Jessie:

no thoughts, head empty

Final Thoughts

Soooo yeah, that’s the end of my dissertation on yuri comics. I know I ended up dragging a lot of popular yuri, but it wasn’t my intention to make you guys hate any of things I talked about. These were just my thoughts as an avid yuri fan, so let me know your thoughts as well, especially if you read any of the yuri I talked about. And even though I’m super picky about the type of yuri I read, I’d still love to hear any recommendations. Who knows, it might dethrone the undefeated champ that is Beauty and the Beast Girl.

[bbyangyl]

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚— RANDOM DEKU HC’S

ʚ♡ɞ˚— a/n: these are some thoughts on what I believe izuku is like in the bedroom, what I believe he’s into, and the type of kinks he has.

MDNI || 18+ MATURE CONTENT BELOW

izuku is a freak bro- literally so fucking nasty.

will cum in your mouth and make out with you as he tastes his own cum.

his mouth is almost always attached to your pussy and ass. loves eating you out so much and will cum untouched at times where he’s too turned on from it.

any position where your pussy is on his mouth is his favorite. whether that be face sitting, 69, etc.

If you end up squirting, will literally burry his face in your cunt!

loves fingering your ass and pussy at the same time.

lowkey has a mommy and lactation kink. will often call you mommy while sucking your breast.

pull his hair- oh my god that definitely gets him going. he wants it so bad.

when he’s subbing, and you peg him?? spank him, pull his hair, choke him, he’ll come so hard.

loves when you ride him, the sound of your moans and your breast bouncing in his face will make him cum on the spot.

loves when you rim him from the back while jerking him off.

will say the nastiest shit ever. doesn’t matter how used to it you are, he will always have you blushing 😭

his dirty talk is so filthy, whether he’s submissive or dominate.

the textbook definition of a switch

when he’s submissive, he’s a whining and moaning mess. he makes sure to let you know how good you’re making him feel through his sweet noises.

when he’s dominant, he’ll be a soft dom, but sometimes he’ll be rough with you if he’s extremely pent up or if you ask him to be.

If you want him on his knees begging you to let him cum then that’s exactly what he’ll do. if you want him to fuck you so hard against the mattress that you forget your own name, that’s exactly what he’ll do. however, if he’s feeling one thing more than the other he’ll let you know so you both can compromise.

likes to fuck you in front of a mirror just so he can have a view of his cock going inside you

loves when you leave a ring of your arousal around his cock if he’s fucking you raw

would love to film you both someday, but he’s a little shy about that one. (funny enough)

he thinks mutual masturbation is one of the hottest things ever.

if you both are away from each other and he gets horny, he’ll steal one of you pairs of underwear, sniffing it as he fucks himself against his pillow.

toys are definitely welcomed. you both have a lot!

he loves fucking you and himself with a double ended dild o in both of your asses while he fucks you himself.

quirks are also used in the bedroom. has this fantasy of using black whip to move you up and down on his cock and use your pussy like a fleshlight.

If it’s too much for him he will unintentionally activate a tiny percentage of one for all and fuck you so hard you pass out.

praise kink, degrading kink go brrrr

edging kink, overstimulation kink go brrr

he also wants to give you a oil massage and get you off slowly. wants the same thing done to him.

he wants to be used so much he’s covered in love marks, cum, and back scratches, and wants you to be in the same state.

wants to go on for hours and hours. with him there’s never a dull moment.

and that’s why he’s such a fucking freak bro 😭

but don’t call him that cause he’ll get off to it 💀

however, he can also be extremely sweet and wholesome in the bedroom.

he loves you so much! sex is a very intimate act for him so he wants to show you how much he loves you.

he so soft, and sweet, will be so gentle with you and ask you if everything is okay.

body worship is one of his favorite things in the whole world. giving and receiving! please make him feel good with your words. tell him he’s beautiful while kissing every scar litering his body. he cries with love filled tears.

he also does the same to you. will spend hours kiss every inch of you body, commenting things like “you’re the most beautiful person in the world. I can’t believe you’re mine. I love you so much”

it’s very passionate and overwhelmingly emotional. If you’re not tearing up he is.

the amount of love he has for you cannot simply be described in words. It’s so much more than that

you’re his other half, his soulmate.

and despite his dirty mind, despite all of his sexual desires regarding you, he cannot help his infatuation with you.

so in love with you that sometimes he overwhelms himself with his own emotions, despite the two of you dating.

but he wouldn’t have it any other way.

so that’s why sex is such a roller coaster of emotions, passions, desires, intimacy, and fun!

[romanoffsbish]

Dance the Night Away

Natasha Romanoff x R

Natasha loves you… | NSFW undertones, but no Smut | WC: 1,724 | Flashbacks between the funny lil lines

It was a quiet night in the Romanoff household, Natasha had only just gotten home from her last mission ever. Then she left again, taking your eldest daughter, Ella, and the bundle of toddlers, Milo and Andrey out for frozen yogurt. Your heart ached to be apart, but it also swelled as she never failed to give them her time. You knew she was tired, her mission was meant to be two days and yet it turned into weeks.

——

Your admiration for your wife only ever grew in these moments, and it was made more wholesome as your ears picked up on something special. Memories of a once blooming love story came back to you as you sipped on a glass of rose, now halfheartedly reading your book as the needle swirled around your favorite vinyl record. It was Adele's greatest cover- To Make You Feel My Love. It was the song that played at your wedding as you danced together as one, a perfect encapsulation of your story, from start to finish. Except fortunately for you both, there was no end in sight.

"When the rain is blowing in your face, and the whole world is on your case. I could offer you a warm embrace; to make you feel my love..."

A flow of happy tears streamed down your cheeks, you then closed your eyes and got lost in the nostalgia.

~•———•~•—————•~•—————•~•———•~

"Excuse me," you didn't have much time to react before your body jolted, a callous hand on your exposed hip the cause for your bodies reaction.

The club was jam packed, bodies shoved up against one another, but this bodily shock felt different. It almost felt like a message with the upmost urgency. Normally you'd shrug the person off, give them a few choice words for having the audacity to touch you, but all you did was shift your body around to face her.

You couldn't tell if it was a mistake, your fronts now flushed as she purposefully pushed you back more. Trapping you against the bar as she'd felt it too, the urge to be close to you was overwhelming and in the same breath it was also the most calm she'd ever felt.

"H-hi," you stuttered, eventually, after what felt like ages of just staring up at her chiseled jawline. Your knees nearly gave out as she chuckled, it was hoarse and the dazzling smirk to follow had you hooked.

"Sorry," she said, forgoing the greeting as her hand went to leave your side, but you reflexively stopped her and offered a nervous smile. "It's okay, I don't mind."

Natasha grinned. "So, you just let people touch you?" You knew she was teasing you, but you couldn't care less. "Not unless they're as good looking as you are."

Natasha hummed as she grabbed the shots she ordered from the bartender behind you. It wasn't her intention to leave the club with anyone tonight, but she did not want to miss out on such a gorgeous opportunity.

So, she let your words hang in the air and, suave as ever, threw her head back to down one while lifting the other up to your lips. You'd parted them without even questioning it, and she poured the alcohol down your throat with a knowing smirk as you instantly coughed.

"What- was- that?" You inquired in a fit of uncertainty, and the redhead chuckled, "Vodka; the Russian kind."

Once you stopped coughing she pulled away from you, watching in amusement as your body lurched to chase down her warmth. "May I have this dance then?"

The booze led you to say yes, rather enthusiastically, and it ended with you two outside of the club. Rain fell from the sky, though it hadn't been forecasted, and you melted into her warmth as she kissed you fervently.

The cab was coming, and soon enough you'd be too.

~•———•~•—————•~•—————•~•———•~

A proposed one night stand that turned into a forever. Natasha knew then that she'd likely fall for you, and the odd thing was she wasn't even scared to do so.

The two of you danced yourself into a lifetime.

There was no end to the amount of times you could reflect upon, Natasha never let the spark die out, even with how busy she was saving the world. Whenever she was away, and the kids were tucked in bed, you'd take moments like these to get lost in the memory cycle.

Sometimes you'd be so out of it, mind too elated to hear the world around you. Like now, you were too lost in the reminiscing to hear the lowly rumbling engine.

~•———•~•—————•~•—————•~•———•~

"Natasha..." The redhead looked at you instantly, her heart racing as she saw you in your wedding dress, you looked perfect. Yet it was somehow bad luck, which is what she shrieked as her hands flew up to her eyes.

"My love," you whispered, hands gripping her wrists so you could pull her hands down to your waist. "You don't even believe in that superstition, and neither do I. Stop letting Wanda get to you, please look at me."

A heavy sigh rushed over your done up face, and her eyes of emerald green opened to look into yours. It set off alarm bells when she saw your eyes were glossy.

Were you getting cold feet? What had happened? She had to find out because if you were running, then she would be right there behind you, on your heels.

"Detka, what's..." You shook your head and cupped her cheeks, she'd yet to do her makeup so it was okay, the dry, bare skin brought you the comfort you craved. "I just needed to see you, that's all. I hated being away from you last night—all these rules make no sense."

"I know," she sighed, "Letting Wanda wedding plan is surely biting us in the ass, hm?" You giggled and the brick that had settled on her chest quickly dissipated.

"I just want you," you whispered, lips ghosting over Natasha's but never touching to keep your gloss intact. She took in a sharp breath as she controlled her urge to kiss you, silly or not, she liked the idea of saving today's first kiss for the altar, but it was hard to refrain. "It's all too much, especially without you by my side."

Natasha knew just what you needed, so she pulled back and extended her hand out to grab yours...

~•———•~•—————•~•—————•~•———•~

"May I have this dance?" You smiled instantaneously, back to your wife as she extended a hand over your shoulder. Seconds, that was all it took for your book to fall from your lap and her hand to envelop yours just before her body did. Natasha pulled you close, soft lips pressed against the warm skin of your cheek, it was unclear if it was the alcohol or her touch that got you to this moment of weakness, but truth be told it was both.

The redhead quickly readjusted the needle, allowing the special song to replay as she pulled you closer. It was never enough for her to have you in her arms, if she could absorb you wholly she probably would, but she'll settle for slipping her hands under your shirt. Her fingertips grazed over the indented lines that covered your hips and her lips found yours forehead.

Natasha inwardly admired your strength, and the work it took for you two to build this life. Her hands never wanted to leave your body, but as the songs blended the mood wordlessly shifted. "Where are the kids?"

Natasha spun you out, then pulled you back in, your face nuzzled against her chest, so you felt as she softly sighed, "They're at Lena's for the weekend, I wanted to surprise you with a few days just to ourselves."

Once the vinyl came to an end you felt a shift in the air, no music needed to play as the energy carried your collective movements. Natasha spun you around, and you responded by pressing your backside into her. Tension left your soul to have her this close again, but it flooded your every sense as she sensually swayed your bodies in sync with the rhythm of her heartbeat.

Natasha moaned against the skin of your neck as your hand reached back to slide into her hair. Your nails scratched at her scalp, melting away the remaining tension from her body that she brought home with her.

Your mind went hazy the longer she moved you, her hands were firm and the thrust of her hips into your backside became a bit more incessant. The redhead turned you around abruptly, your hot breaths mingled as you now shared your air more directly. There was a warmth radiating between your cores that could be felt the longer your fronts swayed together, it was hard to ignore too once you started to whimper at a graze.

Natasha wanted to kiss you, it took everything in her not to, because it'd been nearly a month since she had. At least in the way she was about to, pecking your lips in greeting would never compare to what's to come.

Which is why she refused to do it in such a rush, she planned to take her time with you instead. "Go upstairs," she gently commanded, her tone soft but you knew she wasn't simply asking—she was telling. "I'll be right behind you detka, don't you worry now."

Natasha gave your ass a love tap as you walked away, and chuckled as you squeaked. You sent her a playful glare just before obediently following her request.

Once you were gone she worked quickly to tidy up the room, throwing the boys toys into the right bins, and settling your book with a placeholder on the table.

When she entered the room with her hands full you knew you made the right call by undressing. A bag of organic trail mix stuck out of her jacket pocket, her go to sex snack, then you peered up to see the half empty bottle of wine, and two glasses sat in her hand.

"You always did know how to read my mind..."

•~~ “I could make you happy, make your dreams come true. Nothing that I wouldn't do, go to the ends of the Earth for you—To make you feel my love.” ~~•

[jade4956]

Sunscreen, Snacks, and Supervision

It had been a few years since Tahlia Bliss had joined Chelsea, and over time, the fans had come to adore her and not just for her footballing skills, but for the way she had become a natural part of the Chelsea family. But there was something that was starting to stand out even more it was the way Pernille Harder and Magda Eriksson, two of Chelsea’s most beloved players, seemed to care for Tahlia.

It didn’t take long for the fans to pick up on it. Whenever the cameras caught snippets of team bonding or behind-the-scenes moments, there was one thing the fans couldn’t help but notice. Tahlia, always the center of attention, was often seen getting subtle guidance and care from Magda and Pernille. It was like they had become her unofficial parents, and it was the most heartwarming/funny things.

There was the video from pre-season when the players were sitting down for a meal, and in the background you could hear and see Pernille who was caught gently pushing Tahlia’s plate towards her. “Eat some more,” Pernille said with a soft smile, nudging her forward. “You need the energy, trust me.”

Fans had shared that clip hundreds of times, always with comments like, “Pernille Harder, mother of the year,” and “Tahlia Bliss, the child of Hardersson”

Then there was the day at the beach, when Tahlia had been a little too caught up in the fun and had forgotten to apply sunscreen. Magda, ever the protective figure, had asked, “Tahlia, did you put on sunscreen?” Her voice was filled with genuine concern as she eyed her teammate’s fair skin. “You’ll burn in this sun if you don’t.” Tahlia had rolled her eyes but smiled, already used to Magda’s maternal tone. It had been a moment that only fueled the fan speculation. “This is honestly so cute. She’s like their kid!” fans wrote online.

It didn’t stop there. The more the fans saw, the more they began to joke about it. On social media, the hashtag #PernilleandMadgaparentsoftheyear

Even the none Chelsea fans loved it. “Do you guys notice how Magda and Pernille are like Tahlia’s parents?” one user wrote. “It’s honestly the most wholesome thing ever. They’re constantly looking out for her, making sure she’s eating enough or taking care of herself. It’s like watching a little family.”

Another fan replied, “Right? I swear I’ve never seen two players be so protective of someone on and off the pitch. It’s like Tahlia’s their kid Pernille’s the fun, carefree parent, and Magda’s the strict one who makes sure she doesn’t forget the little things. They even make sure she’s hydrated! It’s hilarious.”

It wasn’t just the fans noticing. Teammates started to joke about it too. Jessie Fleming, laughing with Tahlia one afternoon, turned to her and said, “You’ve got two moms now, huh?” Tahlia rolled her eyes but couldn’t hide the grin on her face. “Oh, don’t even start,” she laughed. “They’re not that bad.”

Fran Kirby, overhearing the conversation, chimed in, “You can’t deny it. Every time we go to eat, they make sure you’ve eaten enough. Magda even gives you the you need sunscreen talk.”

“One time Tahlia said yes Magda I’ve got sunscreen in and Magda was like probably not enough and put more on her” Sam yelled from the back of the walk

Tahlia groaned, but she was clearly touched. She had grown so comfortable with Magda and Pernille, and their care for her wasn’t lost on her. What began as jokes from the fans had become something more genuine in her eyes. It was as if, through their nurturing, they had helped her find her place at Chelsea again, ensuring she felt supported in every way.

Even coach Emma Hayes had noticed the dynamic. During a post-match press conference, when the conversation turned to team chemistry, she couldn’t resist a smile. “It’s clear Tahlia has found a strong support system here,” she said with a chuckle. “We all look out for one another, but it’s pretty obvious that Pernille and Magda have taken Tahlia under their wing. I’d say they’re her Chelsea parents at this point.”

The fans had a field day with that, of course, and soon enough, the media had caught on too. Articles began popping up, lovingly referring to the trio as “Chelsea’s first family,” and highlighting the unique, yet endearing relationship between Tahlia, Pernille, and Magda. Their playful, almost parental dynamic was a fan-favorite topic.

On one such day, after a game, Tahlia was sitting in the locker room, chatting with the others when Magda appeared, a bottle of water in hand. “Drink this,” she said softly, as if Tahlia needed reminding. “You were running hard out there, and you need to hydrate.”

Tahlia laughed, taking the bottle. “You’re honestly worse than my mom,” she teased, earning a soft laugh from Magda.

“Well, if it keeps you in good shape, I’ll take it as a compliment,” Magda replied with a wink.

Then there was the time the team had to travel to an away match, and Tahlia was frantically looking for her charger. As she scrambled through her bag, she heard a familiar voice. “Tahlia, do you have everything you need?” It was Pernille, who had already packed her own things and was double-checking Tahlia’s bag. “I brought extra snacks in case you’re hungry. And I made sure you have your jacket it’s cold in the hotel.”

Tahlia looked at Pernille, taken aback. “Honestly, I don’t know what I’d do without you two.” She said with a laugh

Pernille smiled and patted her back. “That’s what we’re here for,” she said before turning back to her own bag. “Besides, I know you can get a little distracted sometimes.”

Tahlia laughed, unable to argue. “I mean, fair enough.”

One evening after a tough training session, Tahlia collapsed onto the couch in the lounge, groaning. Pernille and Magda came in a few moments later, noticing her exhaustion. “Tahlia, did you eat enough today?” Magda asked, raising an eyebrow.

Tahlia sighed. “Yeah, I had lunch. I’m just… tired.”

Pernille immediately knelt beside her, concern flooding her face. “You’re not just tired. You need proper recovery. Here.” She handed her a protein shake. “Drink this. And go get some rest.”

Tahlia’s eyes softened as she took the drink. “I swear, you two are more like parents than teammates.”

Magda winked. “Better to be a little too protective than not enough.”

And as Tahlia looked around, seeing her teammates, her second family, she couldn’t help but feel overwhelmingly grateful. She had found not just a team, but a home one where she was nurtured, supported, and truly cared for. Even if the fans jokingly called it “parenting,” she wouldn’t have it any other way.

—————————————————————————

I thought it would be a cute idea to make this I really like it and maybe I’ll touch in it more in the future but anyways thanks for reading request are always open

[auroreliis]

Batfam would have to do research on my special interests if they want to win me over fast but also the thought of super serious Bruce and Damian watching/reading jojos bizarre adventure is really funny to me

Absolutely they would. For you, they would binge every show, play every game and read every paragraph of a book just to have something in common with you. They would all do it for different reasons, but in the end, you would have to listen to them outnerd you.

Bruce's regard for your interests is wholesome. He genuinely wants to know what makes you happy, what you do in your free time, what you could talk about for hours. In order to be able to listen to you talk for hours, he surrounds himself with your interests. You like this artist? He buys a few of their most popular albums. This game is entertaining to you? He either tries it out or watches you play it. There's this film you're excited about? He watches it with you.

Although most of your interests are different, he does actually find himself enjoying anything you enjoy. Perhaps it reminds him of you.

Dick has this one fear. He believes that no matter how persistent he is, if you aren't reciprocating his clinginess, the two of you will grow apart eventually, so he never leaves you alone, even when you beg him to. It isn't really a secret, as he makes it quite obvious, but he hopes you will one day embrace him as he embraces you. You probably get sick of him and tell him how boring he is, which shatters his heart completely.

Now he has to figure out a way to spend time with you, but he needs to make sure you are also enjoying his company, lest you hurt him with your cruelty once more, so he researches every last fact about your interests, be it an activity, a game, a book, a person, he knows everything about it. Dick doesn't want to make it obvious that he only found out this information the night prior, so he cautiously needs to start a conversation.

He most likely waits until you are occupied with your interest before walking up to you, "Hey, is that _____? Wow, I used to be obsessed with it as a kid, I'm suprised you even know it, it isn't that popular and it's quite old." He pats your head and sits down next to you, grinning as you start rambling about it to him. You are actually talking to him. It worked.

Jason is careful when sharing his interests with you. He needs to preserve his reputation as your cool older brother and usually people don't share his interests, so when he finds you reading a classic book, he seats himself nearby, waiting for you to finish reading. Once you're done, he makes sure you enjoyed the book before fanboying about it. You immediately notice how much of a nerd he is. He also recommends similar books or ones he thinks you would enjoy as well. In the end he pulls you into so many fandoms that you stop listening when he recommends books. You've already got like 40 more to read.

Tim does not have this problem. The moment he knew you existed, he educated himself and has kept up with your interests ever since. "Just in case", or ,"Just because", he said, typing a summary of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. "I might as well", he takes notes while binging One Piece. This guy is clinically insane. Fortunately for him, he can now start conversations with you very easily, since he knows everything about your interests (and everything else about you).

Side note: If you refuse to spend time with him even after he did all that for you, the following outcomes are possible:

Either you pity him and spend time with him or Dick tries and fails to guilt trip you, only to end up forcing you to spend time with poor Tim who was awake for a whole week just to impress you (Tim frantically nods along with anything Dick says).

Damian takes great pride in having things in common with you, so as soon as he notices you being fond of something, he surrounds himself with it. You have a favourite colour? He creates a few painting with specifically that colour. You like a certain animal? He will try to adopt one. Damian would, of course, never admit it to you, but he desperately wants you to notice that you two have similar interests (As in, you have an interest and he pretends to also like it just so you maybe talk to him).

If you don't talk to him, he will become more aggressive with his attempts of having you notice him, perhaps randomly coming into your room to paint, claiming that the lighting there is better. Or he asks Bruce to adopt a certain animal during dinner. His attempts are obvious to you, but he doesn't know that.

Cassandra wouldn't really need to share interests with you. She's always close to you anyway. While she does speak to you every now and then, she is perfectly comfortable with sitting in your proximity in silence. However, if you ever asked her to, she would research anything you need her to in order to rant or ramble to her. As long as she has her eyes on you, anything is fine.

Stephanie immediately goes to Tim for help, knowing that he went insane and made a bunch of summaries and notes. First, she makes fun of him, then she apologises, because he threatened to take the notes away, she then complains about how much there is to read before finishing the essays Tim wrote, giving herself about a week. Steph then talks to you as if she didn't go through all that trouble just to have a topic to talk to you about.

Dick told Barbara all about his shenanigans. She even helped him figure out what you're interested in, even researching about it herself. She isn't as intrusive as the others, instead waiting until the moment is right, not wanting to scare you away or overwhelm you. Perhaps if you're alone, she'll come up to you and start with small talk, only really mentioning your special interest if it's involved somehow. Overall, she is the least feral of the bunch (in this situation, at least).

[frickingnerd]

nights like this i love you the most

pairing: hitoshi shinsou x gn!reader

summary: shinsou and you both can't sleep, so you sneak into his dorm room and the two of you watch a movie together!

tags: heavily implied romance/romantic feelings, wholesome fluff, no pronouns used, mentions of aizawa, reader & shinsou attend UA together, best friends to lovers

“i can't believe you're still awake at this hour! go to sleep, silly!”

“i wasn't aware you were actually asleep while texting me! glad to know you can multitask!”

“haha… very funny! i know i should be asleep too, but i can't get any rest! what's your excuse?”

“same as yours!”

shinsou stared at your message, awaiting an answer for you for the last five minutes now. it seemed you had drifted to sleep already, despite just saying you were unable to fall asleep.

shinsou sighed and turned around on his bed, continuing to hold his phone near his face, as he still had hope you'd send a message back. despite all the bickering between the two of you, he genuinely enjoyed talking to you. and being able to text all night with you was always the light of his day – or rather night.

just as shinsou was ready to put away his phone and attempt to get some sleep himself, there was a knock on the door of his dorm room. at first, he thought he was hallucinating, but when he heard a second knock on the door, this time a bit louder, he quickly jumped up and hurried to the door. he had a sneaking suspicion that only one person was crazy enough to still be up at this hour of the night...

“i almost thought you had fallen asleep in the time it took me to get here~!”

shinsou was greeted by your playful grin, before you quickly slipped past him into his room, not waiting for an invitation.

“i thought you had fallen asleep when you stopped responding!” shinsou replied, before getting to the important things. “what are you even doing here at this time? if aizawa finds out you snuck out of your room, he's going to be so mad…”

“pff!” with a confident smile and the wave of a hand, you brushed off shinsou's worries. “he won't find out. besides, you're his favorite student! he won't be too harsh on you!”

“i won't be his favorite student anymore, if he finds out you're sneaking into my room at night!”

despite shinsou's complaining, he couldn't help but smile. this was certainly a first, being paid a nightly visit by you. and while he was nervous you two would get caught, he couldn't be happier to have you near him.

“so then… what are we going to do now? i suppose you didn't come all the way just to continue our usual banter~!” shinsou said with a smile.

“well…” you sat down on his bed, pulling some snacks out of your pockets, before grinning at your best friend. “i was thinking we could watch a movie! i already brought the snacks and everything…”

shinsou looked at you for a moment, softly smiling and shaking his head. you really were unbelievable! no one but you would be crazy enough to watch movies at this time of night. but you were different. and he loved that about you!

“you're shaking your head… is that a no?”

shinsou had been so lost in thought, that he forgot how this might come over.

“no–! i mean, no, this isn't a no! this is a yes!”

he stumbled over his own words, trying to make sense of what he was saying. which was quite the hard task when it was already so late.

“what i mean is… i want to watch a movie with you!”

you grinned happily at that response, patting onto the empty spot next to you on his bed. shinsou didn't hesitate and sat down next to you, only for you to inch a bit closer to him, before grabbing the remote and clicking through the potential move options, while shinsou opened a bag of snacks.

“how about this movie?” you asked, as shinsou leaned back against the wall, quietly watching you with a soft smile on his lips, as you leaned forward and read through the movie titles.

“sure, that one sounds good!” shinsou replied, without his eyes ever leaving you.

[lastoneout]

Okay, honest question, who is Yotsuba?

OH HO HO ANON I AM ALL TOO HAPPY TO EXPLAIN :3

Yotsuba is a character from the greatest manga ever made, Yotsuba&!(or Yotsuba to! it translates weird, most fans just call it Yotsuba) which is a comedy slice-of-life manga about Yotsuba Koiwai, a five year old girl, and her very strange yet wholesome family and friends!

It's from the same mangaka who gave us Azumanga Daioh, though while that manga is told in a four-panel comic style and doesn't really have much of an overarching plot, Youtsuba is done in a traditional manga style and despite also being very episodic there is a bit of a throughline surrounding Youtsuba getting settled into the neighborhood she just moved to, growing up, and eventually, in the later chapters, getting ready to go to school for the first time. Also, there are storylines that take place over multiple chapters as well! Despite the fact that the manga has been releasing since 2003, the chapters are pretty sporadic and the comic has only really covered about one year of the character's lives, but it never really feels slow or aimless. It feels almost...timeless? I guess. It's really nice.

Anyway, the manga is legit one of the most wholesome, funny, heartwarming things I have ever read. Kiyohiko Azuma is a fucking MASTER of comedy(you may have seen screencaps from a Sailor Moon fan comic he made going around on tumblr in which Jupiter accidentally sends Venus shooting across a pool that made me laugh so hard I cried) and he balances it well with lots of slow moments with GORGEOUS artwork where you can really take in the scenery and all of it is seeped in a wonderful nostalgia for childhood that legit makes me super emotional.

I don't think the manga has ever really taken off in terms of popularity, at least not to the degree that it deserves imo, which is likely in part due to the creator being firm about it never getting an anime adaptation and the sporadic release schedule, but it's far from unknown. There's been an official(I think??) score released and plenty of figurines and merch. It's also birthed a lot of memes, and it def has the same issue as One Piece where if you read it and love it you will turn into a walking billboard and try to drag your friends and family in with you. It's just THAT good!

You may have seen art of or people cosplaying Danbo, a "robot" made of old cardboard boxes that Yotsuba adores (Totally a real robot btw, def doesn't have a middle schooler shoved inside there, that would be silly wdym /s)

And this pose from the back of one of the manga volumes featuring Yotsuba, her father, and their extremely tall friend Jumbo has been redrawn with other characters like 500000 billion times

And you've also probably seen this going around tumblr before (that's Fūka she's my favorite cringe fail daughter I would literally die for her).

Also, I would be doing a disservice if I didn't mention Yanda, who is a friend of Yotsuba's dad and also Yotsuba's nemesis. He's a loser who constantly gets dunked on by a toddler it's fucking hilarious.

But yeah it really is just like, a manga that feels like a hug, or a warm blanket or something, it's so comforting and funny and fantastic, I find myself re-reading it any time life gets to be too hard just bcs it's that good at distracting me and reminding me that live is worth living.

And also given that it's literally my favorite manga, I saved up a bunch of screencaps to use as reaction images after a read one time, and thus now it's my own little joke that if you send me anon hate I'm just gonna send you back a picture of this cutie

Bcs come on how can you be angry when you're looking at this???

Anyway here's some screencaps of the main supporting cast bcs I love all of them so much <3

YOU WILL READ YOTSUBA I AM NO LONGER ASKING

[bird-inacage]

Only Friends Episode 5 | "Well, I thought you might want to spend the day with someone special."

Ray you idiot, you are that special someone.

This was the most unexpectedly funny and wholesome thing ever. For a moment Ray was just like 'what reality are we living in right now??' before just accepting the wild universe that is Sand's life. Also, Sand's mother is an absolute legend.