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the-ferocious-kittyrose · 4 years ago

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What I would’ve done w/ Lotor’s character

It’s not exactly a secret to anyone who’s been following me for a while that I’m not the biggest fan of canon Lotor. I had high hopes for the character from his 80s counterpart and intro in season 3 but I was really let down by the direction the writers went with him in canon.

When he was introduced, I was so hoping for him to be this cocky manipulative asshole that’s only out for himself. I love that character archetype so goddamn much.

But in canon he was just kinda boring to me. His personality was bland and his motivations never really made sense. He’s introduced using empty promises of peace and comradery to manipulate people, then its revealed that he actually does want peace and comradery and wants to lead a peaceful empire, then that turns into draining Alteans and wanting to kill all Galra...

I also didn’t like how the writers decide to tack on this whole child abuse plot to explain why he was the way he was. As if that’s the only way to make a villain sympathetic. Yeah other versions of Voltron have touched on Lotor’s childhood before and it was never pleasant, but VLD really leaned into that shit, to the point where it felt like the writers were just shoving angst down our throats thinking that equals good writing.

It takes more than a tragic backstory to make a character compelling. It takes an interesting personally and motivations that make sense. And you can make a character tragic/sympathetic in more subtle ways.

For me personally, I wanted Lotor to be a sorta fusion of Loki and Littlefinger in space.

Loki is a sly trickster who grew up feeling like an outcast, unaware of his true heritage. He grew up believing he could be king but when his shity father handed it to his perfect brother he felt he had been robbed and decided to take the throne by force.

Littlefinger is a small man from a small house with no power, and after getting the shit beat out of him trying to win the hand of the girl he loved, he decided he would use his intelligence and skills in manipulation to screw over all these noble lords and weasel his way into the throne. And when he did he would finally get vengeance on all those who had looked down on him.

I feel like this fits Lotor well. Lotor is a prince, so he isn’t small in that regard, but he is not respected in the way a prince should be.

He is a lot smaller than the average Galra. And even though Lotor is still quite strong, developing a fighting style that suits his small form and uses his opponents size against them, in a society so heavily based on physical strength that’s still a big blow to your rep.

He employs half breeds, which we know are looked down on in the empire. And there are definitely rumors about Lotor himself being a half breed. I think after 10,000 years Zarkon would’ve done a pretty good job at hiding Lotor’s heritage from the public but just looking at him compared to the average Galra there’s going to be some suspicion there. On that note Lotor is probably considered butt ugly by the Galra.

And Lotor works in the shadows and achieves his goals through lies and trickery, which Lotor himself says are things the empire looks down on.

So yeah, the people in the empire hate Lotor. Even Sendak who’s all ‘Gung ho empire’ has no respect for Lotor. And because of this it would probably be up in the air whether or not Lotor would even be allowed to take the throne if his father were to pass, even though it’s his birthright.

And in the face of all this rampant disrespect, Lotor decides that he is going to overthrow his father and take the throne. And when he does he will take vengeance on everyone who had ever undermined him and expand the empire beyond anything his father could’ve dreamed of.

And don’t try telling me, “oh that’s so out of character! Lotor would never take pleasure in the pain of others!” Because he does.

Remember Throk? Remember how Lotor sent him away to the worst station in the empire and joked about letting him, “rot with the ice worms?” Remember how Lotor later invaded his station then watched with a grin as he was tortured by Haggar?

Lotor 100% takes pleasure in hurting those who would hurt him, because it makes him feel powerful.

Now let’s talk about Lotor’s planet. The one given to him and destroyed by Zarkon. I always felt weird about this plot. Obviously it’s a very sad thing to have happen, but I always liked the idea of Lotor’s promises of peace to be empty, a means of manipulating people. So this whole situation being genuine feels weird to me.

In my version, Lotor didn’t get banished for being too kind. He got banished because Zarkon caught him in a plot to betray him.

When Lotor was put in charge of the planet, he seduced and married the princess Ventar. He filled her head with promises that her people would be free and they would rule the universe together and convinced her to secretly round up her armies and send word to her ally planets to do the same, so they could start planning a way to overthrow Zarkon.

It’s left ambiguous whether or not he was being genuine and whether he really loved Ventar and intended to keep his promises to her or if she was just a tool to get the throne. But either way, it ends the same. Zarkon finds out, destroys the planet, kills Ventar, and exiles Lotor.

Still sad/humiliating thing for Lotor, and definitely a story that could gain sympathy from Allura.

Speaking of Allura and Ventar, let’s talk about Lotor’s relationship with the women in his life.

(Trigger Warning: Brief mention of of a rape scene in GoLion)

In the 80s Lotor was incredibly misogynistic. He walked around with a harem of half naked women, tried repeatedly to kidnap and marry Allura against her will, and in GoLion it’s heavily implied that he raped Romelle because she looked like Allura.

It’s a common joke in the fandom that he went from this to drinking respect women juice in VLD but I don’t know if I’d go that far.

He’s definitely better in VLD than he was in the 80s, but even in VLD he manipulates, uses, and hurts most of the women in his life.

Allura is the obvious example, but you also have his generals. Acxa talks to the paladins, Allura in particular, about how persuasive Lotor could be. Implying that she and the other general were manipulated the same way Allura was.

Well not EXACTLY the same way Allura was, romantically I mean. Though there are people who believe that Acxa was also in love with Lotor and he used that to his advantage, which I can see.

But I feel like it was more about giving them a place in an empire that didn’t care about or accept them.

I hate The Last Jedi but I really feel like the line, “you’re nothing, but not to me,” fits really well. They were outsiders with no place to go until Lotor swooped in and gave them a purpose.

Do I think that there was a part of Lotor that genuinely wanted to help them because he saw a kindred spirit in them? Yeah. But I also think that at the end of the day, they were more tools than real friends. And he had no qualms about killing them if they betrayed him.

The situation with Narti proves that. As well as the fact that Ezor and Zethrid seemed very scared of the prospect of Lotor being alive and coming for them.

And then you have Allura. Lotor’s lust for Allura has always been a very important part of his character. In the 80s the reason behind his obsession with her was that he had a lot of baggage about his mother and had a thing for women that looked like her. Also the fact that he just didn’t like not getting something he wanted.

There was never any love. He didn’t want to be with her, he wanted to own her.

In VLD, his want for Allura seems to stem more from the fact that she’s Altean than an Oedipus complex. As well as the fact that she’s powerful and skilled in Altean alchemy, which makes her rather useful.

I don’t personally believe that Lotor ever really Loved Allura. I think he liked the idea of her and what she could do for him, but the end of the day she was more a means to an end than anything else.

Allura’s been trough a lot. Zarkon betrayed her family and destroyed her entire planet only about a year ago from her point of view, and she appears to have a pretty bad case of survivors guilt and PTSD. And to make matters worse, while Lotor was on the ship she was fighting with Shiro, someone she clearly cared about. The idea of loosing him after already losing so much must’ve been really painful.

She was hurting, conflicted, and lonely. Which made her all the more vulnerable to Lotor’s manipulation.

He took advantage of her loneliness and insecurities, making her believe she had found someone who understood her and could help her avenge her family and planet. She trusted him, let herself be vulnerable around him, which made it hurt even more when it was revealed to all be a ruse.

And then you have his relationship with his mother Honerva/Haggar.

I talked a lot about this in my whole rewrite/rant about Honerva, but I’m not a fan of how they made their relationship 100% negative. I feel like it robs the show of a lot of interesting character interaction.

It’s sad. The whole relationship is really tragic. Shit like this is literally my worst nightmare. The thought of looking my mom in the face and have her not recognize me as her daughter keeps me up at night.

But the thing is, in canon the relationship kinda falls flat because Lotor and Haggar/Honerva have no connection. Haggar was awful to Lotor and Lotor hates Haggar. What reason do I have to be invested in their relationship?

So If you haven’t read my Honerva rant, here’s how I would’ve done the Honerva Lotor relationship.

10,000 years ago, when Alfor came to Dibazzal to convince Zarkon to close the rift, Honerva went into labor. Alfor and many Galran doctors tried there best to save her and the baby, but the quintessence had damaged her body so much that she couldn’t be saved and died in childbirth.

Zarkon went ballistic and Alfor had the doctors take baby Lotor somewhere safe, fearing Zarkon would take his grief and anger out on the child.

After Honerva was resurrected as Haggar and throughout Lotor’s childhood, they had a strange sort of relationship. Lotor was an inquisitive child and was always curious about Haggar and her work, making a habit of following her around like a little shadow and watching as she worked. And there was also the fact that, while his father was never friendly, he was calmer when she was around.

Haggar had no idea what to make of this weird child following her around all the time. All these big strong Galra were terrified of her but this tiny child showed no fear as he tugged on her robes and excitedly asked questions about her work. And she never minded. She didn’t know why or how to explain it, but she cared for the child. As much as a soulless undead witch could care for something anyway.

But as time went on there relationship became more and more strained. Lotor was a smart kid he was gonna find out about his mother and deduce what happened to her.

He resented Haggar. Resented her for not remembering him. Resented her for the fact that he had to go through life without a mother while she was right there. And he resented her for being loyal to Zarkon, who had been making his life hell for thousands of years.

Every time she showed him something resembling kindness he’s conflicted. He knows he should feel happy that she cares, but at the same time, why does she care? It’s not like she sees him as her son.

He turned to denial, insisting that Haggar couldn’t possibly be his mother, even though he new the truth deep down, and a part of him always secretly longed for her to remember who she was, who he was, and embrace him as her son. He hates that part of himself.

And when he does meet Honerva for the first time, it’s... tense... to say the least. Having his mother reach out to him and acknowledge him as her son is something he thought would bring him joy, but in that moment all the pain he went through rises back to the surface and he lashes out. He draws his sword and is about to cut her down but he hesitates. He’s trembling with tears in his eyes. He can’t forgive her, but he also can’t bring himself to kill her.

Then you have his relationship with his father.

It’s no secret that Zarkon is an awful man and a shity father, always has been.

The explanation as to why is kinda shaky. All we get is Zarkon saying Lotor is his greatest shame because he’s Altean but I don’t know about that. Zarkon may hate Alteans but he loved Honerva and I don’t think he would be ashamed of his relationship with her.

He definitely did his best Lotor’s heritage from the public. But I don’t think that’s the reason he hates him.

In my version of the story, Zarkon hates Lotor because Honerva died giving birth to him and Zarkon blames him for her death. He lost his beloved wife and was forced to watch the son that killed her waltz around wearing her face.

It didn’t help that Lotor was a snarky rebellious kid that liked to show off. He did things his own way, didn’t care much for rules, and had a real knack for finding loopholes. All things that made his strict father very angry. He was an embarrassment. Small and rebellious. That’s why Zarkon began training Sendak.

I personally believe the reason Zarkon was so trusting of Sendak and had so much faith in him was because Zarkon had been grooming him to be his “true heir.” Sendak is the epitome of what a Galra should be. Strong, loyal, and brave. He would be the son Zarkon wished he had. The favorite child.

Lotor obviously hates Zarkon, and rightfully so. Zarkon hates him for something he had no control over and constantly disrespects him.

Lotor may not follow the rules, but he passes every trial. He excels at everything he does but Zarkon refuses to see that all because he blames him for Honerva’s death.

Lotor sees Zarkon as an old fool. He knows that he could do a far better job at running the empire.

Lotor dedicated thousands of years of his life to overthrowing Zarkon. His hatred for his father was his motivation, what got him out of bed every morning, so when the deed is done and Zarkon was finally defeated, in the moments after he felt empty.

But he didn’t have time to dwell on that feeling for long. He still had to deal with his father’s men and take the throne that was rightfully his.

Then you have his plan.

Lotor’s plan in VLD is really weird and over complicated. There was no real reason for the whole draining Alteans thing. Just a lazy way of making him 100% evil.

The plot could’ve been a lot simpler. He gains the paladins trust, gets them to help him build his ships and overthrow Zarkon, and then once he has the throne he pulls an Uno reverse card and is like, “yeah, nothing personal but this was all a trick and imma lock you and your lions up now.”

Obviously more complicated than that but that’s the basic idea.

One of my main problems with VLD is that they had a bad habit of over complicating the plot. People don’t care about VLD because of the plot, they care about the characters and their relationships, the actual plot doesn’t have to be anything spectacular.

It’s strange to say but I feel like the writes tried too hard with Lotor. He had the potential to be an amazing villain but the writers were too focused on tricking the audience and making him angsty that they forgot to make him compelling.

#Voltron #vld #voltron legendary defender #prince lotor #Lotor #emperor zarkon #zarkon #haggar #honerva #princess allura #Allura #acxa #ezor #Zethrid #narti #galra #vld critical #discourse #sincline

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izlaria · 4 years ago

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Someone you like (part 5)

This is the fifth chapter of my “Someone you like” inspired fic. It’s also available on AO3 in case you prefer that platform.

This and the fourth chapter are also inspired by the “Distance” and “Talk to me” animatics by @suerakocy, so please check that out and give the artist some praise. They deserve it so much, because those pieces are beautiful.

Summary: It takes Lance years to come back to the Garrison but, when he does, his friends are there for him.

We finally get Lance pining hour!

Trigger warning: Talk of PTSD and mention of blood, but no description of violence. The story really just starts right in it.

24 and 22 years old

Lance woke up to a dark, quiet room and for a moment he couldn’t move. He could barely breathe. The air felt stuck in his throat, because as soon as he inhaled the sound of his haggard breathing would break the silence and alert whatever awaited in the shadows.

But there’s nothing there, Lance told himself.

He had dreamt of the war, again. In his nightmare, there was another explosion and Lance hadn’t been quick enough to shield whoever was with him in the room. The darkness that followed was oppressing, dense enough that he’d felt like it was water flooding his lungs.

And then the water had turned into blood.

He sat up in bed, trying to control his shaking. It had taken years and a lot of therapy, but Lance had managed not to fall into panic attacks every time such memories made their way into his dreams. Still, he was glad to have built his own house on the farm grounds. His parents deserved a good night’s rest, especially after what Lance had put them through during his time with Voltron.

He reached for his cellphone with unsteady fingers. After their last battle against the Galra, Lance had learned to leave it on during his sleep, just in case he woke up like this: with adrenaline running through his veins and the vague sensation that something was terribly wrong.

He hesitated over his contact list, before finally scrolling down and pressing call. It didn’t take long for the other person to answer.

“Is anyone hurt?” was Keith’s greeting.

“No.” Lance swallowed once, trying to erase the grit from his voice. “Nightmare.”

There was a second of silence and then the rustle of sheets. “Okay.” He heard Keith exhale harshly, but Lance knew it wasn’t in annoyance. The whole team had gone through this more times than they could count. “Okay.” Keith seemed a little calmer now. “Are you all right?”

“Not really,” Lance confessed. He leaned against the headboard and pulled his knees up. It was easier to concentrate on his breathing when he wasn’t lying down. “It was Sendak’s first attack, again.”

“You’ve been thinking about that one a lot lately.” Keith’s observation made Lance grind his teeth. It was true, but he didn’t need to say it.

“Could you call her?” Lance breathed out. His voice sounded pained and he winced, thankful that only Keith was privy to it.

“Lance, we can’t keep doing this.” His friend’s tone was weighted with his own share of hurt. “If you want to know how she is, then you need to call Pidge.”

“I do call Pidge. Just not…”

“Not when you are feeling vulnerable?” Keith sighed into the phone, sounding more tired than normal.

“You weren’t sleeping, were you?” Lance latched onto this realization. He felt stupid not to have recognized it earlier, with how quickly Keith had answered the call.

“Don’t change the subject.” The reply came harshly and it only served to confirm his suspicions.

“I’m not! We made a deal to call one another if the flashbacks started again.” He lit up the lamp on his nightstand and frowned at the pictures he kept on the opposing wall, as if it could make the real Keith feel his irritation. “Would you have talked to anyone if I hadn’t called?”

“My mom is here with me,” Keith admitted after a moment. “She and Kolivan have kept me company while Xitry is away.”

Lance let relief replace his anger. “Are both Xitry and Acxa on a mission?”

“Yeah… My leg still isn’t completely healed, so I couldn’t join them. Acxa will take another phoeb to come home, but Xitry should be back in a few days.” Keith paused and there was the sound of other muffled voices. “Mom says you should call Pidge.”

“You are a traitor and a hypocrite.” Lance scowled, despite how no one could see him.

Keith scoffed and Lance could feel the mockery in his expression even so many miles away. “I have called my partners every day they’ve been gone. Can you say the same?”

“Pidge is not my partner!” he protested, feeling heat rise up his neck.

“No, she’s just the first person you think about when waking up from a nightmare and then you call me, because if you called Hunk he would just spill it to her first chance he got.” Lance did not appreciate all the sarcasm Keith was giving him.

“I just want to be sure that she’s okay!” He frowned down at his knees, picking at a piece of lint that stuck to his pajama pants.

“Then ask her yourself!” Keith, too, was being too loud for the middle of the night. His vexation almost felt like a victory to Lance. “Pidge is smart, she can tell there’s something strange about my calls.”

“How are you a spy with this kind of acting skills?” Lance chastened.

“I’m no longer a spy, remember? I’m part of a humanitarian organization!” He heard Keith take a deep breath. “This would be much easier if you just told Pidge you’re in love with her.”

The words gave him pause. Lance didn’t yet know how to describe what he felt for Pidge. She was one of his best friends, the person who had stuck around the most after the team went their separate ways. Shiro had his own family to rebuild, and Keith and Hunk had a whole universe to help stabilize.

Pidge and Lance had found their own goals, but staying on Earth allowed them to check in on each other much more often.

“She doesn’t see me like that, Keith.” Lance hadn’t meant to sound so defeated, but it came out that way.

“Yeah, well, neither did Allura, but you wore her out.”

The reminder didn’t bring the same pain it would have a few years earlier.

Lance knew that he would always love Allura, but his feelings had settled into a more comfortable kind of affection. With the privilege of hindsight, Lance was able to see that their relationship didn’t have the same base as his friendship with the other paladins. Even if she had lived, Allura would have left to be queen, too invested in the rebuilding of Altean society.

And Lance would have stayed on Earth. That had never been in question. He had put his family through enough suffering while with Voltron.

He had seen the greatness in Allura when he was only eighteen, but that also meant he would have stepped aside if he thought their relationship was putting a strain in both of them. He didn’t regret the time they’d had together, but her continuous rejections had also taught Lance to value himself.

Keith’s voice snapped Lance out of his thoughts. “I didn’t mean to bring up Allura.”

“No, it’s fine.” Lance rubbed his eyes. “I just… I don’t want Pidge to think of Allura if I ever do ask her out.”

“I can’t promise you that.” He respected Keith’s honesty, even though it did nothing to calm his worries. “But she will never see you as a romantic prospect if you don’t make things clear to her. As far as Pidge knows, you’re still in mourning.”

Again, Keith was right. Lance had been ruminating this notion for quite some time. There were times when he still felt indebted to Allura, like he was the one responsible for maintaining her legacy, but the years had given him enough maturity to understand that was a burden Allura would wish on no one.

It was difficult to take the first steps towards a new future when he’d spent so long wallowing in the darkness of the war. In the middle of it all, Pidge had been a beacon of light, a safe port for him to rest his mind. It was no wonder that he had fallen for her.

“I’m thinking of going back to the Garrison.” He swallowed thickly, the fear of this confession rising up to knot at his throat.

The line went silent for a moment. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah.” Lance chuckled. “I’ve been working with Shiro and Doctor Holt, because the quintessence Allura left in me allows me to interact with Altean technology a little better than most. And since I’ve put my pilot license to good use in my travels, Shiro said the officers are ready to reinstate me.”

“That’s amazing, Lance!” It was weird to hear Keith sound so enthusiastic.

“I think that’s why the memories are coming back again, actually.” His next exhale came out shaky and forced. “I keep thinking of the Garrison and I just – I’m afraid that I’ll get there and it will be too much.”

“The place has changed a lot since the war,” Keith assured him. “Even if something happened, though, Shiro and Pidge are there to help you through. This could be really good for you.”

Lance snickered at his directness. Keith didn’t hide his opinions, didn’t coddle him like so much of his family. “So you think it’s a good idea?”

“I think it’s the best idea you’ve ever had.” His friend’s voice was blunt, without the dramatics that Lance himself would have added to such a statement. “Which is not saying much,” Keith teased.

“Hardy har har.” But Lance felt a smile pull at his mouth. “Does that mean you will call Pidge for me?”

There was a groan from the other side of the line. “Lance, no. I’m putting my foot down.”

“What? Why?” he complained and, with his movement, one of the pillows slipped to the ground. Lance glared at it.

“Because I’m sick of watching two of my closest friends dance circles around each other.” Keith sounded increasingly exasperated. “Talk. To. Her. Pidge is a tough girl, but she has grown a lot. She won’t be mad at you for calling.”

“I know that!” Lance grumbled.

“Then do it!” Before he could disagree, Keith had already hung up the phone.

Lance stared at the screen in discontentment. The display told him it was just before 4 am in Varadero, meaning that it wasn’t even 2 am in Arizona. His talk with Keith had distracted him from the nightmare, but now that Lance was alone with his thoughts images of it had begun to flash in his mind.

Against the dimly lit wall of his bedroom, he could almost see the silhouette of Pidge’s younger self, her body contorted by the force of a blast Lance hadn’t been quick enough to protect her from.

His need to know Pidge was safe overrode his anxiety over disturbing her sleep.

The phone rang more times than it had with Keith, which was a bit nerve-wrecking, but also a relief. Lance hoped she was having a better rest than he was.

“Lance?” The breathiness of her voice made him swallow. “Hi.”

“Hi,” he replied, at a loss of what else to say.

“Nightmares?” From her low volume, Lance could tell that Pidge must have been at her parents’ house. He felt bad for disturbing them.

“You’re okay, right?” His words were jumbled together. “I didn’t mean to wake you up, but– You are safe, aren’t you?”

“I’m safe, Lance.” He closed his eyes, feeling the last of his distress leave him with the sound of her voice. “I’m glad you called, actually.”

He tilted his head back until it hit the headboard. “Were you dreaming of me, Pidgey-Pidge?”

“No,” she cut him off brusquely, “but I imagine you were dreaming of me.”

“Why would you think so?” He grimaced at how strangled his voice sounded.

“Because I know you have had Keith calling me for the past couple months.” Her no-nonsense attitude made Lance feel like a deer-in-headlights.

“I can’t believe he ratted me out!” Once again, Lance directed his glare at a photo of Keith on the wall. “I have some choice words for that half-alien tattletale!”

“Keep your words, he didn’t say anything.” Pidge heaved a sigh. “I just know you two. As soon as he mentioned the explosion Sendak caused, I knew he was acting on your behalf.”

Lance winced, but didn’t protest. He should have realized that Pidge couldn’t be tricked. Not only was she a certified genius, but her loyalty to her friends often translated into being more observant than one might like. She and Hunk had that in common: the uncanny ability to get involved in other people’s business.

“Keith dreams of Shiro or his father. When I do appear in his nightmares, it’s usually about not being able to grab me when we were in Honerva’s mindscape,” she went on. “That dude still harbors a displaced sense of responsibility towards us.” Her tone shifted into accusing. “Which we should not be exploiting.”

“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to do that.” Lance slipped on the sheets until he was lying down again.

“What’s going on, Lance?” Pidge sounded concerned. “Why didn’t you just call me?”

There were many reasons, but none that he felt comfortable sharing. It had been a year since Lance had realized how much of an effect Pidge had on him, how happy he was to hear her voice, how warm his chest felt when she visited the farm. It wasn’t even a new development. He had loved her for as long as he could remember, so he couldn’t really define when it had gone from platonic to romantic.

Maybe the roots of it had always been there, hidden by the flashiness of other infatuations.

A part of him had resisted the urge to call Pidge because, despite how she probably knew him like the charted universe, he had hoped she would see strength in his recovery. Lance still wanted to be perceived as the hero who survived the war with a smile on his face and his psyche intact, no matter how far from the truth that might be.

“Shouldn’t it be easier?” he asked, so low that he hoped Pidge couldn’t hear him. “Shouldn’t I be over it?”

“Lance…” Even the way she sighed his name sent a shiver down his spine. “No. It shouldn’t be easy. We’ve talked about this.”

He had heard this from a number of therapists, as well as every other member of the team, but it was difficult to go against the ideals he’d created in his head.

“But you’re doing good,” Lance argued and his gaze fixed on the ceiling, without really seeing it.

“So are you, most of the time.” When Pidge said it like that, full of confidence, he could almost believe it. “When I feel like the memories are hurting me, I reach out. I come to see my parents, I stop by Shiro’s office.” She paused to take a breath. “I call you.”

Lance turned on his side, sticking the phone between his ear and the pillow. He badly wanted her to be there. They had slept side by side once, though he couldn’t remember the details of it. Even then, what had stuck out the most was the softness of her presence and the calm she provided.

He closed his eyes and focused on Pidge’s voice. “I really miss you.”

“I’m right here, Lance.” Like this, he could pretend she was in bed with him. “I’m not going anywhere.”

“I can’t believe you put a firewall to keep me out of your virtual diary, Pidge. It’s rude that you would think so low of me.”

Lance stopped short. It wasn’t the content of the conversation that surprised him, but the fact that it was Hunk’s voice, coming from the laboratories. His best friend had been on a diplomatic mission of two months and was supposed to contact Lance when he stopped on Arus to refuel his ship.

“I was clearly right, because you wouldn’t know of it unless you had tried to hack in.” And this was Pidge, sounding more incensed than he’d heard in quite some time. “I learned my lesson during our Garrison days, Hunk!”

“Shouldn’t you be buttering me up? You called me for help on this aircraft, young lady.” Lance almost snorted at this. He could already imagine the indignation on Pidge’s face.

“If I had known you’d be like this, I would have found a way to neutralize drag simply to negate your role here!” she spit back. From behind the glass walls, Lance observed the redness of her complexion and how her freckles disappeared into the color.

He expected Hunk to back down, but the man crossed his arms stubbornly and looked down his nose at Pidge. “You’re only saying that because I’m right.”

Lance knocked against a metallic frame on the door, which had been open.

“Team Punk is back at it?” He raised his hands in mock despair. “I knew I should have stayed home.”

“Lance!” Hunk rushed over to him, engulfing Lance in a hug. Over his shoulder, he saw Pidge hang back, but the anger had melted away from her expression. “Sorry I didn’t call you earlier, man. This little menace caught me on the way back from Firilar and she wanted me at the Garrison ASAP.”

“Yeah, I regret it now,” she retorted with a glare.

Hunk let Lance go in order to direct another exasperated look at Pidge.

“Hey there, Pidgeon.” Lance scratched the back of his neck, unsure of what to do. She didn’t move from her spot on the workbench and he approached almost without thinking. “Long time no see.”

As soon as he was within reach, Pidge pulsed on the balls of her feet and threw her arms around his neck. Lance’s arms were around her with no hesitance, holding her up against his chest.

“Hello,” she muttered into his shoulder. “Aren’t you supposed to be in the Cabul complex with Shiro and Curtis?”

Even as she talked, Pidge didn’t give up her grip on him. It made laughter bubble up Lance’s throat. He’d been all around the world, assisting the Garrison centers in completing Earth’s first fully functioning planetary defense system, so it had been months since he’d last seen Pidge in person.

“I flew over once the installation was done. They needed me to activate the shields with quintessence, but then Arizona called.” She slowly slid down back to her feet, putting some space between them. “Something about needing their star pilot to test a new jet.”

He watched as first confusion, then realization dawned on Pidge’s face. To the side, he could see that Hunk was also grinning.

“Are you back? Don’t you lie to me, McClain!” She pushed at his shoulders, but there was excitement in her eyes.

“I’m back. I got the go-ahead earlier today.” He felt awkward under the combined stares of his two best friends. “I do remember telling you I wasn’t ready to retire. Guess my vacation ran a bit long.”

“Oh, man, we’re back together! The last time it was just the three of us in the Garrison we were still cadets.” Hunk jumped in, waving his arms widely. “I still couldn’t go on a simulator without getting motion-sickness! Lance still thought Pidge was a guy!”

“Yeah, I’m not making that mistake again.” Lance gave Pidge a cheeky once-over, making her flush.

She had let her hair grow out again. It was tied back in a long braid, but some strands had already escaped and framed her face in a reddish halo. She looked pretty like this, but Lance thought she was always pretty.

It had taken her some time to find middle ground between the androgyny of her adolescence and the femininity of Katie Holt. Lance hadn’t always been the most tactful during this period, but Pidge had known he meant well and that he was supportive of however she felt like expressing herself. It was nice to see her feel good in her own skin.

Pidge socked him on the arm. “We’ve talked about this, loverboy. No flirting with me unless you want a new bruise.”

“But, Pidgeon,” he put a hand over his heart, “this is how I show my love.”

“Okay, that’s enough!” Hunk put a hand on their shoulders. “We don’t want to start a fight right next to the billion-dollar prototype.”

“Fine,” Lance drew out his vowels, making a show of it. “Honestly, though, you two look good.”

He wasn’t just saying this. Coming back to the Garrison allowed him to juxtapose the images of who Pidge and Hunk had been with their current selves.

Hunk hadn’t grown much taller and he had maintained the same robustness from their first meeting, but the anxiety that had followed him as a teenager now gave way to self-assuredness. He didn’t curl into himself anymore when going past other groups of students, nor did he cower in the face of Garrison officers.

They were all still young and maybe a little broken up after Voltron, but it had also taught them a lot about themselves and their worth. It was nice to see.

And then there was Pidge. With her long hair, her high-tech glasses, her unconventional wardrobe. She was nothing like what younger Lance had thought he wanted in a girl, but that didn’t stop her from occupying all of his thoughts.

“You do too!” Hunk exclaimed, clearly a little embarrassed. “I haven’t seen you this excited in years.”

“Yeah.” Lance chuckled, unable to stop himself. “It feels good to be back. We’ll see how things go with the other MFE pilots, but I’m not too worried.” He wiggled his brows at Hunk. “I’m pretty sure I can charm the pants out of them.”

“And if that fails, you can always count on Shiro and I to intimidate people,” Pidge cut in, a teasing smile on her face, but there was a deeper current of truth to her words. They had his back and Lance was grateful for it.

“I’m pretty intimidating myself.” Lance smirked. “We just need Keith and then the gang will be completed: the Garrison bad boys, who stole a prisoner and disappeared into the night!” He made a motion in the air, like a ship cutting through the sky.

“I take it back, I don’t want to be associated with you.” Pidge’s dry comment earned a laugh from Hunk and a pout from Lance.

“Oh, come on, Pidge!” He draped an arm around the girl to pull her closer, but Pidge didn’t react as he’d hoped. She leveled him with unimpressed eyes, making no move to acknowledge their proximity. Lance found himself as the one feeling flustered and hurried to mask his discomfort. “You could at least say you’re happy to have me around.”

“Of course I’m happy, Lance,” she conceded with little fanfare. “That doesn’t mean I feel like contributing to enlarging your already massive ego.”

Pidge was looking at him over the top of her glasses. Uncovered from the greenish tint of the lenses, the honey brown of her eyes appeared strangely expressive. There was an emotion in them that he had seen a lot through the years, when they were on video calls at night, by themselves, but that he hadn’t had the opportunity to see in person yet.

Lance felt his own expression soften as he stared down at Pidge.

Before he could figure out what to say, Hunk, who had been preoccupied with a series of beeps from his communicator, had turned towards them and snapped his fingers. “We have so much to show you, now that you have the clearance!” His smile was even more contagious in person than through a screen. “I don’t know how much Veronica has told you–”

“Told me?” Lance interrupted with a laugh, trying to seem as innocent as possible. “As if my sister would spill transnational secrets.”

Hunk’s mouth twisted disbelievingly. Pidge, too, shook her head.

“I know how it is to have a family in the Garrison, Lance,” she admonished, slipping out of his hold. “Everything is confidential until something slips out in the middle of Sunday lunch.”

“Well…” Lance squinted at the LED lights on the ceiling. “If something did slip out, like the existence of a certain wormhole-jumping craft that is supposed to make teludavs obsolete, then you couldn’t really blame Ronnie.”

“Especially since the only one with a high enough rank to know about that is Shiro.” Pidge groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. “A lifetime in the military and he’s still the most trusting person I’ve ever met.”

“It’s not like he’s broadcasting it to the rest of the coalition,” Hunk pointed out good-naturedly. “It’s just Lance.”

Pidge didn’t look appeased. “I’ve seen Lance reveal all our identities because he wanted to impress an alien groupie.”

Lance grimaced at the memory. It had been a little after the war, when the Garrison was still arranging diplomatic meetings with the liberated planets. As a result of his words, he and the other paladins had been mobbed and Coran had to create a diversion to get them back in their ships.

“That was a long time ago,” Lance whined. “Besides, the so-called groupie was a child and you know I can’t resist children!”

Pidge fixed her glasses, her expression a mixture of aggravation and amusement. “If you ever have kids, you’re gonna spoil them rotten.”

Lance had to bite back his immediate response. His mind had come up with an image of what his and Pidge’s children might look like – brown haired and brown skinned and too smart for their own good – and the idea warmed him to the core. He had almost said that his kids would be fine, because of their mother’s genius.

His thoughts must have shown somehow because Lance caught Hunk looking at him with a smile that promised no-good.

Lance cleared his throat. “What were you two fighting about, anyway?”

“Hunk has been trying to access my daily annotations,” Pidge explained, moving to one of the nearby computer monitors.

Over her head, he and Hunk continued to share looks and mouthed words. He couldn’t really tell what his friend was trying to say, but Hunk pointed at Pidge, then at the computer, making exaggerated facial expressions that would have been comedic in any other circumstance.

At their apparent silence, Pidge’s fingers paused over the keyboard and she whipped around to look at them in suspicion.

“She means her diary,” Hunk interjected quickly, only to receive the brunt of her glare. “How am I supposed to know what’s going on over here if you won’t let me read it? I spend half my time out in space!”

“Can’t you just believe the things I tell you? Like, I don’t know,” this Pidge grumbled with a sour look on her face, “a normal person?”

Hunk snorted. “You want to talk to me about being normal?” He glanced at Lance, as if to ask if he had actually heard her correctly. “Pidge, we had to build you a dorm in the Mecatronics Advancement building, because you kept falling asleep in the lab.” Hunk turned back to Lance and pointed a thumb at Pidge. “She would be passed out with the new Rover just constantly knocking against her back.”

“So what?” She crossed her arms and jutted out her chin in defiance. “I like what I do. At least I’m not a busybody!”

Lance could feel a new fight brewing. Or maybe it was fairer to say that it was an old fight, one that every paladin had already had with Pidge.

“Katie.” His use of her given name made Pidge’s attention snap to Lance. “We’ve talked about this. Your therapist has talked about this.” He put a hand on her shoulder, then slid it down until their fingers intertwined. “I know you like feeling useful, but we’re not at war anymore. You can rest.”

“Exactly.” Hunk sighed, thankfully not making a big deal of Lance’s touches. He reached out to ruffle her hair. “We worry, girl.”

Pidge let go of Lance to bat Hunk’s hand away from her braid. The smile she gave them was tight-lipped but fond. “Then just say that, you idiot.”

“Why should I?” Hunk shrugged, sending her a sly look. “You only seem to believe it when it comes from Lance.”

He was saved from Pidge’s cold fury by his communicator going off. It sounded more like an alert than the normal message, filling the lab with high-pitched beeps that could have awoken even Pidge in her days of all-nighters working on the lions.

“Shoot!” Hunk frowned at the device. “I have a meeting on the other side of the complex!” He looked around with wide eyes.

Pidge picked up a folder that rested on her workbench and thrust it into Hunk’s chest.

“I hope you’re late,” she said in a deadpan, making both Lance and Hunk laugh.

“I’ll see you in the taxiway later, right?” Hunk asked, already half-out of the door.

Lance gave his friend a thumbs-up. “And we can go into town after the demonstration!”

When he turned to face Pidge, she was back at the computer, shaking her head at the screen with a smile still on her lips. He leaned against the table and simply stared at her as she worked, knowing full-well that part of her attention was still on him.

“What?” she caved after a few seconds. Lance batted his lashes at her. “Ugh, stop! If you want me to go into town, then I have to finish this calculation.��

“Eight years since we were cadets here and you’re still a stick-in-the-mud.” He watched her roll her eyes. “Please, you gotta come! I don’t know any of the cool spots anymore and Hunk has been off-planet!”

“As if that could stop Hunk from knowing the good restaurants,” Pidge muttered under her breath, frowning at something on the computer. She clicked one final key, before fixing her gaze on Lance. “Also, it’s actually been twelve years since we were cadets. Time might not have gone by for us, but things here certainly did change.”

“Quiznack, don’t even remind me of that!” Lance ran a hand across his face. “Rachel has finally shut up about how we’re the same age now.”

“Did she?” Pidge raised a brow at him, leaning her hip against the workbench in much the same way as Lance had. “Cause she still called me hermanita the last time I visited the farm.”

“Yeah, you ain’t getting rid of that nickname.” He chuckled. “It’s better than mami and pop-pop calling you Palomita, though.”

Machines whirred around them, a distant sort of sound that barely registered in Lance’s mind. His thoughts were stuck in the contentment displayed across Pidge’s features, like talking about their adventures on the farm filled her with as much warmth as it did him.

And maybe it did. The paladins and their families had grown closer during the years following the end of Voltron. They had all needed support in ways that only those who had also gone through the same grief could understand. His mother had talked to Colleen and Krolia multiple times, looking for advice on how to handle his PTSD, and Lance himself had reached out to Matt when he didn’t feel like speaking to his siblings or to the team.

It was odd to look back and remember how lonely he would feel back in Castle of Lions, when there were so many people now who he loved and who had gone to the ends of the universe for him.

“What are you thinking about?” Pidge tilted her head to the side, her eyes glinting with curiosity behind those glasses.

“About the team,” he answered, because it was partially true. “About how long we’ve known each other.”

Pidge nodded, but her gaze had shifted to the ground. Hesitance furrowed the line of her brow.

“Does being here–” She paused, then seemed to gather her courage. “Does being here remind you of Allura?”

The question caught him a little off guard. It was inevitable to think of Allura when looking back at their time as a team, but Lance hadn’t expected Pidge to focus on that. Keith’s words from a few months ago echoed in his mind, that Pidge couldn’t know he had finished mourning for Allura if Lance never told her.

“A little, I guess, but it’s not bad.” He made a humming noise, considering what to say. “It feels strange to realize we’ve been without her for longer than we ever knew her.”

She pushed away from the table, just a little, so that they were facing each other. “Time doesn’t have to limit how significant a person is to us.”

“I know, but no matter how important Allura was to me, I know now that she wasn’t the love of my life.” Lance let Pidge catch his gaze, willing her to recognize that he wasn’t lying. “Because my life goes on.”

“Which is why you’re here?” There was doubt in her tone, as well as something that Lance wished he could call hopefulness.

“Which is why I’m here,” he repeated with more certainty.

#plance #pidgance #lidge #flirtyrobot #cyance #katie holt #pidge gunderson #lance mcclain #vld lance #voltron #voltron legendary defender #vld #vld fanfiction #vld syl verse

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quokkacore · 5 years ago

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you stole my star [kim junmyeon]

summary: ‘defeat the bad guys, save the universe, get the guy.’ that’s how it’s supposed to work, and you intend to follow it in that exact order, because it seems pretty complicated to not do it that way. but your team leader, junmyeon, makes you want to throw the entire plan out the window.

pairing: blackpaladin!kim junmyeon x gender neutral redpaladin!reader

genre: voltron!au, sci-fi, angst with a happy ending, i guess?

warnings: language, mentions of torture, war, and violence, implied self hatred, implied ptsd, mentions of attempted self injury, slight body horror?, mentions of amputations and forced body modification (reader is forcibly experimented on and given a prosthetic arm)

song rec: daft crush - instant crush (feat. julian casablancas) ♡ coldplay (feat. rihanna) - princess of china

word count: 1.8k

a/n: this was originally posted to my old writing blog on november 30th, 2018. at the time i loved the voltron reboot and was still optimistic that the final season wouldn’t suck. for those of you who don’t know what voltron is: voltron is a giant mech robot formed by five smaller robots in the shape of lions. each lion is piloted by a paladin, and the lion chooses their paladin according to the traits the person possesses.

masterlist

The training room was where you spent most of your free time, nowadays. You missed the days where you were able to throw yourself into bed and not get up until your body odor demanded you take a shower.

The training sequence you were currently practicing with was programmed for hand to hand combat. The drone you were fighting against was pushing you to your limits, feeling your muscles strain with every punch and kick you threw. You were quick to calculate when to dodge the punches the drone threw, when to step back when the drone advanced.

The drone advanced, and you took your opportunity, throwing a punch, followed by a kick to the stomach. The machine fell to the ground, but before you could finish, someone interrupted you.

“End training sequence.”

The drone vanished as it registered the command, and you rested your hands on your knees, lowering your head as you recognized the voice. “I almost had it there, you know,” You muttered bitterly, between pants. You heard him shift behind you.

“I know you did. But I needed to talk to you.”

You remained in your position for a few seconds, catching your breath, before standing back up straight and turning to face your leader.

Junmyeon had been your best friend, back on Earth, back at the academy where you both trained to be deep space pilots. Everything changed when the blue lion was found on earth, and you all realized Baekhyun was its pilot. It led you to the castle, which was also the ship you currently resided in, and eventually, to the rest of the lions that formed the mightiest weapon in the universe: Voltron.

As Baekhyun was destined to be the blue lion’s paladin, Sehun was to be the green lion’s paladin, Yixing the yellow lion’s paladin, and you the red lion’s paladin. Junmyeon had been destined for the black lion, the biggest one, making him the leader of the paladins by default.

“What is it?” You asked irritably, walking past him, pulling on your jacket and grabbing the bottle of water you always carried with you during training, both of which were next to each other on the floor next to the wall.

You eyed him warily as you uncapped the bottle, taking a long sip. He was still wearing his armor, black and white, fitting against his built, lithe body. His hair, slightly mussed from having worn his helmet, was sticking up in a few different directions. He looked rugged, handsome as always. But you were still pissed at him, regardless of how handsome he looked.

“I wanted to apologize,” He murmured, not meeting your gaze as he crossed his arms. You lowered the water bottle feeling a few drops fall down your chin as you leaned against the wall. You frowned and mirrored his posture as you crossed your arms as well.

“Jun, I get it,” You replied gruffly, pulling out the hair tie that was holding your hair up, “You’re under a lot of fucking stress. You’re the leader of the resistance against the Red Forces, and everyone looks up to you for guidance. I get that. But what you said? Calling me useless in front of the others, in the middle of a dogfight like that? Fucked up. Fucked. Up. I’m your second in command, Jun. I think I deserve a little more respect than that.”

“Why do you think I’m coming to apologize for!?” He fired back, immediately defensive. He was angry, you could tell, even as he looked down, and you shifted your gaze elsewhere. “You think I’m proud of the fact that I said that? I don’t, Y/N, not at all.”

His voice cracked, and you looked back to him, in shock. “Jun—”

“You’re not useless,” He insisted, voice quiet,” I was freaking out about what was happening. It’s the first time you’re in major combat since— since—”

He didn’t finish, but he didn’t need to. You knew what he meant.

About a year ago, you’d been captured in a major battle between the Red Forces and the Voltron Coalition. The months before your rescue were harrowing, full of torture and using you as their little lab rat. It didn’t cost you your life, but it did cost you your left arm.

Your left arm, which had been replaced with new RF tech in an experiment they’d performed on you. It wasn’t your arm. It was a piece of disgusting metal that was attached to your body and you hated it, almost as much as you hated the Red Forces themselves.

Ever since your return the team had been tiptoeing around you, especially Junmyeon. You were grateful for it, the first month or two, giving you your space and letting you recover, but the more time went on, the more restless you became, missions that could have been done much faster with your help became more tedious and dangerous as you were told to stay in the castle.

You were left behind with the others, Chanyeol, Minseok, Jongdae, Jongin, and Kyungsoo, all aliens of the same race whose planet had been destroyed by the Red Forces, to wait, and to be treated like glass began to put you on edge, until very recently when decided that it was time for you to rejoin the fight.

“Jun, I…” You lowered your head, sighing. “I get that you’re scared, I’m scared too. But I have to do this, not just for my sake, but for the sake of us. The universe.”

His hardened gaze was aimed towards the floor, but you could still see the uneasiness in it.

“Do you remember the medical assessment Chanyeol performed on you once we rescued you?”

Chanyeol was the head medical chief aboard the ship. You furrowed your eyebrows, trying to recall.

Truth be told, your memory of the rescue, before it began, during, and after it ended, was fuzzy. Subconsciously, you’d forced it to the back of your mind, not wanting to remember the traumatic events that occurred. If Chanyeol had performed a medical assessment on you, which sounded logical, you couldn’t recall.

You shook your head, telling him this. He shut his eyes, and shuddered.

“I don’t think you’d fully realized what they’d done to your arm until that moment when Chanyeol asked you to move your fingers, because he wanted to see how the arm worked.“

He was looking at you now, the look in his eyes grim, pained. You could feel his breath fanning your face. When had he gotten so much closer to you?

“Y-you started crying and screaming, freaking out. Before long, we had to restrain you, because you were trying to pull it out with your other hand. We didn’t want you to hurt yourself. I couldn’t let you hurt yourself, more than you already were.”

You didn’t say anything, because you could feel your throat tightening.

“Y/N, you’re the red paladin. The red paladins are always the toughest ones, the ones that keep it together when everything is going to shit. It’s why we work so well together, if I freak out about something I know you’ll be there to help me through it. To see you like that, I…”

He didn’t finish.

You looked up to finally face him, and the tears in his eyes were prominent, but he immediately began blinking them away.

“I panicked today, because I didn’t want them to take you away from me again. A-away from all of us.”

“Jun,” You mumbled, voice weak. He paused. You began subconsciously counting the seconds that passed.

Three… four… five…

Junmyeon surged forward, engulfing you in a hug. His armor was cold against your skin, and you could smell the faint metallic smell that came from it. He smelled like the body wash he’d picked up in an alien trading post a few months ago, the one that made him smell like incense.

You shut your eyes tightly, arms coming up to embrace him as well.

“I’m so, so sorry, Y/N,” He whispered, “And I know what I said isn’t justified but I don’t want you to think that I think—”

“Junmyeon?”

“Y-yeah?”

“Shut up for a minute, please.”

He didn’t answer, for which you were grateful. You willed your body to relax, your stiff limbs sighing in relief as you slumped against the black paladin.

You weren’t quite sure how long you stayed like that. But when you did break away, you could see that you were both crying. You sniffled, scrunching up your nose, before opening your mouth to speak. He did the same.

“I love you.”

“I’m still mad at you.”

Your eyes widened at his revelation, heartbeat accelerating rapidly. “What?”

Junmyeon licked his dry lips, eyebrows raised. “I said,” He murmured softly, as his words were only for you, “I love you.”

You stared at him, mouth agape.

“J-Junmyeon, I…”

You weren’t quite sure how to respond. Sehun had always teased you about how you two made “googly eyes” at each other when the other wasn’t looking, but you always thought it was just his overactive imagination. On Junmyeon’s part, at least.

One of his hands left your back to come up to your face. His gloved hand wiped away one of the tears that had fallen down your face, and you sighed as the rough material dragged against your skin.

“I know it’s a bad time,” He explained, shaking his head, “What with the universe depending on us to save it, and all. But never for a second have I ever thought that you aren’t the one for me.”

You inhaled softly, a sad smile ghosting across your face. “Jun, I… I don’t know if I can do this, right now.”

His face fell, and he began to pull away from you, but you grabbed his face to keep him in place. His nose brushed against yours, and you gulped in anticipation. His face was unreadable, eyes gazing into yours earnestly, sadly.

“C-can I kiss you? Just this once?” He murmured, resting his forehead against yours.

You nodded, drunk off of his proximity. “P-please, Junmyeon…”

His lips were soft, gentle, and warm against yours, and you felt he was trying not to overstep your boundaries, not too harsh or overbearing. His hands pulled you slightly closer as yours gripped his face tighter than before. He hummed into the kiss, and you hummed back, hands going to run through his dark, already mussed up hair.

You pulled away slowly, slightly out of breath. You exhaled shakily, well aware of what you’d just done. “Junmyeon, we can’t. N-not right now.”

He nodded, but didn’t let you go. You didn’t want him to, anyway. But the moment you left this training room, it wasn’t Y/N and Junmyeon, it was the red and black paladins, leaders of the Voltron Coalition. If you decided to go through with a relationship, you risked ruining your friendship, as well as the whole way the both of you ran the rebellion against the Red Forces. It was simply too much of a risk.

“But if you’re willing to wait for me, Jun…” You murmured, meeting his melancholy stare. He nodded, soft smile returning.

“I will, Y/N. Promise.”

#kpop x reader #exo x reader #junmyeon x reader #suho x reader #kpop angst #exo angst #suho angst #kpop scenarios #exo scenarios #suho scenarios #junmyeon scenarios #my writing

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wofuru · 6 years ago

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Voltron s8 (long post sorry)

So ... voltron has come to an end (unless there are more surprises coming). And I will say right of the bat that I am devastated.

I know this is 'only' a tv show, but let me explain some things to get you on the same line. I started a little late on the VLD train thinking it was only a mecha anime show at first and then I saw the character designs. Shiro caught my attention right away and Keith as well. And then watched season 1. That moment when Keith finds Shiro and turns his head, his expression at seeing the only person he loves and that have been there for him being alive after all... I fell in love with their relationship. I thought ‘huh oh ... I think I got a pairing I will be shipping XD’ and tough myself as silly.

And then as the episodes went on, the more we got to see a beautiful, respectful relationship between two men that are equals. Yes Shiro is technically his superior according to ranks at the garrison, but he treat him and all the other paladins as equals. He is their leader, but most of all their friends. Shiro/Keith relationship evolves through the serie, but have always been on the basis that they love each other so so much, but do not stop the other from taking risks, they trust in each other strenghts while they still worry for each other. They keep saving each other in so many ways that are shown to us through the series.

Sheith vs gays representation in stories/series

Sheith has been since the beginning something more than any of us, more then what anyone could have expected. They represent something we haven’t seen before. And this is a m/m couple relationship that is pure, non-toxic and natural, not forced. And also not between background characters. Yes we have been having as the LGBTQ2+ community more representations in the last few years in different shows. while females couple were more rarely seen at the beginning, they were there as a beautiful and cherished relationship and treated as normal (unless it falls under the stereotype that it’s hawt because its 2 girls having sex in the mind of classical straight guy characters representation). But with m/m relationship, we have been shown as either toxic relationship in which one or both partners cheat with sleeping with someone else or are blatantly sleeping around with just everyone (cheating or as an open relationship sort of). Every gay couple shown as kinky stereotyped relationship that are together only to have sex all the time and nothing else. IN the rare cases that it is not the situation we see, instead we get a character that we learn is gay after a while and mentions having someone in their life that we either never see or are simply a nobody OR someone super stereotyped like a girly boy or drag queen (in which there is nothing wrong with being at all, but they are used as a moquery to being gay in these cases which IS disrespectful). Sheith is the 1st relationship that are neither these. Both are important characters, both are strong characters and none girly to have like a “Who’s the girl in the couple” vibe. They are equals, have a healthy and interesting relationship. Every interactions they have are natural and transpire sensibilities that as men we are still told or shamed everyday if we dare show or talk about.

AND take into account that not only adults watch the show. Kids of all age love those characters for WHO THEY ARE and learn that it is alright to love people around them, to show them. That it is not wrong to be two boys and love each other so so much, to show your affection towards the other.

Shiro is also a man that was sick and lived with it knowing he had little time left. He got abducted, abused in so many ways. Lost an arm and still continues to love and care about people. He still continues to fight to what is right, despite his ptsd, despite all.

Characters in the season

What Season 8 did (and 7 as well to a certain extent) is show us that it doesn’t matter how hard you fight, how hard you care, you’ll get everything get ripped from your hands. Life won’t be kind to you ever. Shiro lost the black lion for no real reason, just an excuse to have Keith become the main character. But moreover got shoved on the side in a corner to be seen once in a while so we in the fandom would not rant too much about him barely existing anymore as a character. In s8 they have stripped him of every character traits he had to make him become the basic space ship AI character type that speaks to only to explain what the audience and the other characters needs to be explained to let the story move on. He does not even get to be the one leading the meetings and building the strategy. Every occasion they had, he was put on the back up line to let Voltron pass forward. He became a plastic character with no personality.

As for Keith... Keith got every dialogue Shiro would have normally have, even the phrasing of how he speaks is not reminiscence of himself, but the same as Shiro speaks, his words, attitude, everything. So his personality was thrown out the window. The goal of the series had been for him to evolve from the right arm character to a leader (which does not stand right with me for other reasons I will speak in another post maybe in the future), but that is understandable. But for that, he didn’t have to become someone else. Being a leader can be done different ways. Yes Shiro was and is a big influence in his life, but they are two different persons. Why they are so strong together is because they complete one another. Keith could have picked on some things from Shiro, but make it is own that is what I mostly want to say. To see him preside the meetings at the garrison, make the strategy, tell people what to do inside the Atlas, not just the Voltron team is simply bad, both for him and for Shiro’s character. This is completely OOC in many ways and also put Shiro in the corner as non existant, especially since we see in the room with them sitting and saying nothing.

I have been speaking mostly of Sheith, but the other paladins also lost all their flavors in this season to become 1 dimensional. Hunk is the cook that cares, Pidge the genius geek and Lance ... the worried boyfriend, Allura the character that wants to save everyone herself alone and will stop at nothing to do so. All the side characters of the series were on point, but none of the main cast characters were. Every paladins became those plot exposition devices to explain what was going on because it became so condensed with concepts and ideas that were interesting yes, but there is such a thing a too many things happening. And with all those things they have sacrificed what the people loved the most about the series and it was the characters and their story. The season was about mechas fighting mechas so the universe would not explode too much or will come back.

Wrapping everything up

Through the series we met a lot of different people, planets and all. We even got the AUs that were confirmed and given in a way to the fandom to validate that all the content fans have been doing were considered as possible because of the infinite quantity of realities in which the characters could have had different lives. This was truly a beautiful gift to everyone, to every crack ships even.

Now in season 8 we see all those aspects being reduced to shreds. The paladins of old are shown, but disappear forever. The olkari gets destroy and we never hear from them again, all the realities get destroyed expect the one we are following which makes it so that ONLY this one is the real one starting from there. Putting the fans to realize that however this ends in the next minutes of the show, this will be the only possibility the story will end, so you better put your seat belt on, because if your ship doesn’t happen, then no hope for you.

Pairings and couples

Allura and Lance became a couple through this season after a well evolving relationship through the season, but at the end Allura sacrifice herself, with the team not really trying to stop her, except Lance. Which does not make sense since they do not even react that much until she says her goodbyes to everyone. So they kill one of the pairing right here and there saying that Lance will always think of her and remember her. He gets marks just to remember him more. But there is no chance of redemption, Allura is dead, becoming cosmic dust in the skies.

Punk didn’t happen, but this is something we could have anticipated. Since they do not seem to be with someone else, this at least gives lenience to an open ending game for them.

And now Sheith ... at the very end, they have decided that Keith would go back to the Galras and try to make them evolve in a better society, which is interesting BUT. As we see in the 1 year later skip, they do not seem to have been in contact with him at all because they were asking news on how things were going with the Galras. And Shiro is the one asking so it means that they haven’t both been in contact in a long while. Then comes the epilogue in which we see Keith continue to travel the galaxies helping people in his separate way and Shiro ... gets married to a nobody that we never saw before s8 (unless maybe in the background once in s7 I hear). They made the guy speak a few lines during this season and these moments always seemed forced implanted so we would know who he is sort of. The whole s8 (and even 7 to a certain extent), Keith and Shiro never interacts. Like at all. They become complete strangers. Keith is seen behind Shiro at the marriage seen like a posted image half hidden. Which does not make sense and is simply insulting to the fans. If they were not romantically involved, they were if anything at least best friends, there were their everything. And Keith telling Shiro he loved him was never addressed, the whole black paladins episode either. They never talked about it on screen and if it was behind the scene ... it made Shiro stop talking with Keith entirely ? Which he would simply never do and Keith would never abandon Shiro either. We have seen him run the universe times and times again to help him, save him, be there for him. To have Shiro simply leave (and become a HOUSE WIFE no less) is worse then killing the ship, it is an insult to every gay out there. This tells us all that it is ok to be gay, but choose someone that nobody will care so it does not make waves, that when you do, leave to live the discreet life and abandon your dreams and your personality. That basically you need to lose yourself, to hide, to be afraid. That if you tell someone you love that you love them (especially between guys), you will lose them, that they will never speak to you again.

And THAT is the problem. Yes I am sad my ship didn’t become canon on screen, but if they had made an open ending, it would have been just fine. Have Shiro arrive when Keith leaves for the galras saying ‘hey Keith, we need to talk’ or just leave with them. Anything, but not this. But aside from just my ship, don’t just coward behind because you are afraid to show a main m/m couple show on screen. Sheith is the most beautiful gay representation in American history and instead, DW decided (not Lauren and Dos, I mean above them who made these decisions) litterally piss on our face and throw a bone at usby marrying Shiro to a guy to say hey you got your representation and we are the first animated show to have a gay marriage seen... but it does not count DW. The guy is a nobody cares about, this is just throwing gays under the rug, again.

Modified scenes

With everything that have been digged out by now after s8 dropped, we now know that this ending was NOT the one the creators did and wanted. They wanted to most likely make Sheith cannon, and I am pretty sure this wedding sequence was suppose to be Keith and Shiro due to a post Lauren made not so long ago about what seemed to be it showing a black and a red hearts which has been the representation logos the fans have been using for Sheith since the beginning. I also found this last scene when the lions leaves slightly off. The moment we see Shiro and Keith one behind the other (which is gorgeous), Shiro seemed weird and I realized why by seeing someone talk about it on twitter. Shiro is missing his left arm at that moment and shoulder making him look was thinner. Which look like he was there maybe with his hand on Keith’s shoulder like on the drawing Lauren gave us the day before the season aired. We know that Ezor was supposed to be dead, but they brought her back after all with another VA which means they did this change very last second and couldn’t get the VA to join perhaps. They added scenes with this couple maybe to purchase our silence into the lgbtq2+ community representation, so we would have 2 couples and shouldn’t whine about it. But ... by doing this and sacrificing maybe scene Shiro and Keith had during this season to have none at all is again just an insult to the fans of the serie. S8 was bad from beginning to end. Some elements were fine, but 90% not. This is an insult to the fandom, to the dedicated fans and also to the crew who worked on the show for so long.

.... with all that said, since we know now that LM/DS didn’t have this ending in mind, this means the S8 ending (at least the epilogue) is actually not canon. Yes it was aired, but it was made by people who took the final result, basically sabotaged/vandalized it and gave it to people to see. Sheith is canon and this is not fine that it ends this way. I do pray they will hear us all and make things right. Give us the real footage of this season, release it to us and even better remove the season we have on netflix now and put the real one. This is something they can do, they have the real footings. And some series have done this before by removing episodes that ended up being racist and disrespectful. Making things right would prove they care about the fans of the show and the people that were there to support them and also the crew who worked so hard and made so much efforts and put their soul into their work.

I’ll still be posting Sheith arts and fic. This relationship have moved me like nothing ever did in my life (and I am 32) and made me get back on my feet from a very dark place. I am like Shiro, I have ptsd due to events that happened in my life that were done to me. I was judged all my life and worked hard to be where I am today. I am disabled in some ways and also come from an abusive family where I was raised to be a slave. Seeing a show like voltron, a character like Shiro made me see what I was and the wounds I had that I was walking on all those years. Because of him I finally got the courage to get to see doctors and specialists to heal all those wounds so they would become scars. And I know I am not the only one. Voltron was the best thing that happened to me in many ways and to see it destroy so many lives now (because this is what this season has done) is the saddest thing. I am scared to see kids when scars from this and I know this is already happening. And adults will have to.

Send your love to the animators and VAs and LM/DS for all their work and let’s hope we can fix this somehow or help them do it.

#shiro #keith #sheith #vld #voltron #voltron legendary defender #vld s8 spoilers #voltron s8 #vld s8 #these are my opinions #I'm a train wreck right now

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harinezumiko · 6 years ago

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Okay like... These are some useless nitpicks that bothered me about how much the S5 finale felt like it was supposed to be a series finale--especially since the interview bits I’ve seen since do... seem like that was the crew’s initial intention? But here are some things that I’m trying to keep my shipping bias out of, but which seem like they needed addressed and weren’t:

Dewey and Buck’s relationship doesn’t seem to get addressed after Dewey stops being the mayor. Which... yeah okay, Buck is off doing band things with Sadie Killer, but I don’t think we even saw Dewey find out that was going anywhere unless he was in the pan shot at the very end?

I can only assume namedropping Sabina was a late-stage decision after they knew S6 was going to happen, but having “nobody shows up only once” as a Talking Point in this series, and then only seeing Mystery Girl/S at a concert in Empire City in a crowd shot is... not really good, imo.

Pearl and Lapis have never spoken directly. At all. I presume they talked about what humans like for the “not-Thanksgiving” episode, but that was off-screen. That’s... kind of an issue. Especially if Lapis is living in Beach City now. And friends with Bismuth. Which also should’ve gotten touched on. But a’ight.

Steven has never actually been shown having the much-needed-all-along talk with the CGs directly about thinking that they resented him for existing instead of Rose. Like. He never talked to Garnet or Pearl about it. He mentions it to Amethyst before they realize they share horrible self-esteem. As far as we’ve seen, the Cool Kids know better than the mom squad about it.

Didn’t actually... see the Diamonds’ pearls in that finale. So I mean, I obviously want to know more about that, we know they knew each other, but no interaction at all. But also, what the hell becomes of Pink’s original pearl?

Speaking of, did the CGs actually see what was going on during the fight where they were puppets? Did they hear everything? Do they now know that Steven can’t be separated from his Gem? Do they now know that Pearl almost killed him as an infant?

I take issue with the musical montage to gloss over “fixing” the corrupted Gems. Like... So much of the series was about them. About the fact that these used to be Gems. Garnet says their minds were torn, and apparently what it took to heal them was combined Helping from all four Diamonds--which, okay, makes some sense with the out-of-canon explanation about the Diamonds making up a Freudian archetype--White is the Superego, Yellow and Blue are two sides of Ego (alternatively left/right brain), Pink is the Id, all four need to exist and be harmonious for Gemkind to be balanced, for individual Gems to be balanced... but I had to go back into my psych notes and Google shit to refresh that shit, and other than the Voltron Diamond ship we really don’t get canon explaining it in a way that I think kids would get at all? The previous canon explanation that the corrupted Gems’ minds were torn in a way that couldn’t just be healed by Steven’s love and good intentions was a good message regarding PTSD and psych issues, so glossing over everyone getting “fixed” to some degree at the very end and then... not anything else, that seemed rushed and weird.

Are the uncorrupted Gems going to live on Earth now? Were we just supposed to assume they stayed? Jasper stops attacking because Yellow Diamond gives her a Look and Amethyst is suddenly friendly, but dude, there were hundreds of corrupted Gems, and they weren’t all Earth-friendly or on the CGs’ side. They’re just copacetic now?

Also what about Homeworld’s adjustments? White is going to be part of Homeworld again, but they have to Do Change and have literally no example to go off of. It’s not like their minds changed about anything except Pink, which White was the only one who needed to change her mind about.

Zoomans...? Famethyst...? Holly...? Whatcha gonna do with them? Also do our fused Topaz babbies get to be happy? We didn’t even get them in a pan shot. Is Aquamarine still horrible? Where the fuck is Emerald? Crazy Lace? Snowflake?

So yeah, idk. Like. There are many things I would have changed about the S5 finale. I am very excited for the prospect of a sixth season to address some of this shit.

#steven universe #su meta #su spoilers #complaints department #no1curr o'clock #so many opinions

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the-sixth-lion-blog · 6 years ago

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Things Happen For a Reason... Unless You Write For Voltron

There are tons of continuity errors and full on missing character arcs. So many, in fact, that I wonder if they didn't know how many seasons they were cleared for or how much time they had.

Has Lance Always Been Like That?

The Lance I met was a relatable character. Erratic, rash, defensive, but also empathetic, loyal and infectiously optimistic. Still, he's... The dumb one. That's his main title, the running joke, the flatness of his character.

So where did this suave, sweater wearing, humble nerd come from? He uses words that indicate a college reading level. He is capable of expressing his thoughts and emotions with beautiful fluency. It doesn't feel right.

This is a massive change from his fairly well developed character arc of him finding a place in the team, growing as a sharp shooter, being uplifting and learning selflessness. It also completely undermines his budding brotherhood with Keith to let him go have fun with Allura. Sure, we all like a well dressed Lance who uses big words and likes... Farming?

Yeah, so nothing about Lance's love for piloting persisted past Voltron I guess. His extreme passion for being in a team, his clear ability to shoot and his love of flying and exploring must have diminished the second he touched Earth and transformed into a completely different and unrelated field of work. I understand that, I promise, but it doesn't seem like Lance, who spent years overcoming his intrinsic dumbness to be a pilot at the garrison. We see him struggle for this! He wanted it.

He loved it.

And Speaking of Love

Guess what, this isn't going where you think it is!

That's right! Friend love!

These guys are best friends. They hang out, they know each other, they spend excruciating amounts of time stuck with each other at the Garrison on ships. So why does that all nearly disintegrate come Voltron? Lance and Hunk almost never exchange memories of their time at the Garrison. Anyone who has moved knows how fast those memories of their old life flow. And Pidge completely isolates herself. If you didn't know it you would never guess the three had been a lovely little friend group.

No wonder Lance had such a crisis when Keith showed him up as a pilot. Hunk and Pidge are immediately emotionally distant, his hero Shiro thinks he's a dumbass and he has to live on a crazy space castle with the usually angry and creepy closeted emo kid (adored by Shiro, who don't forget is Lance's #1 role model) who is somehow also clearly better than him.

Their friendship has been reduced to filler episodes.

Was That Shiro Cowering in a Corner or am I Imagining Things?

Nope. There it is.

Wow. Well. If I'm not mistaken this man has a rocket arm that delivers swift and capable punches. Now, that is clearly not as important to the show as his arm wrestling capability but if the writers wanted Shiro to have true, consistent and well written PTSD I would have accepted that as an explanation for his sudden inability to fight. But seeing as Shiro's nothing but traumatizing past (torture, losing his arm, being made to fight for his life in a space Colosseum while grappling with the existence of fully developed alien life that is trying to end earth, losing Sam and Matt, being trapped in a Lion, suffering the loss of Adam) has had almost no effect on his life past serving to provide minor exposition or to give Keith a chance to do something.

To further this point, here is a list of every time Shiro (not Kuron) got into a fight before and after Keith became black paladin. Here, a fight is if Shiro was outside of Voltron and engaged in any hand to hand combat or was injured by a malevolent being that was targeting him.

Ep 3 S1

Ep 4 S1

Ep 8 S1

Ep 9 S1

Ep 12 S1

Ep 13 S1

Ep 1 S2

Ep 3 S2 (in flashbacks)

Ep 4 S2

Ep 6 S2

Ep 7 S2 (in the astral plane)

Ep 10 S2

Now let's skip ahead.... 4 seasons... Oh man

Ep 12 S7

that's it

Ah. Hm. I think the data speaks for itself, don't you?

So what in the world happened to Shiro, gladiator and protectorate who would die for his team? When the enemy infiltrates his ship and attacks his friends, he is transformed into an inexplicably incapable soldier.

Shiro Actually Married "Adam", if You're Hard of Hearing

Have you happen to have heard the video guide for the ending of the last episode?

I'm a little skeptical of the source so let me know if this is incorrect. If it's real audio then I'm just disappointed.

Full Metal Paladin, Brotherhood

Sorry for forcing the title but it's the best thing that came to mind.

Keith and Shiro are close. Since they met, Shiro has been gently guiding Keith to his best path. Their bond is undeniable.

Out of all of the paladins, Keith should understand Shiro the best. So why in the world does Keith never bother to check in with Shiro? Strange migraines, not feeling like himself, making unnatural decisions? I doubt that anyone would see this as a warning sign for "clone," but anyone who has claimed a close friendship with someone will be concerned when they begin acting erratically. When Shiro mentions how terrible he's feeling-

(here is where I used up my image allowance so just imagine what I put in brackets)

He gets no response, and even Keith ignores his joyous outburst of "I feel so much better!". There's an appropriate "friend" response to that that Shiro does not receive from anyone. Keith, above all other paladins, is likely to know just how much Adam meant to Shiro, but Keith doesn't supply a shoulder to lean on at any moment. The writers want us to know that Keith loves Shiro. In what exact way I care not to delve into, though I would personally argue in a brotherly way. So why does Keith let Shiro's heart waste away like this?

[Shiro being sad which happens a lot actually]

Me too, Shiro. Me too.

The Allura of Power is Too Great

Why did the white lion choose Allura if not because of her intrinsic incorruptible self? And what changed in her heart or the story to make her seek dark power? She got infected with S1 Lance disease I suppose, because all of a sudden she's being dangerous and thoughtless.

[Allura opening up the stupid case and letting that thing out]

In s8, the situation is pretty dire. But it was dire before. She already learned not to trust Lotor, but then you know, he shows up and looks like Lance a little bit and that's enough for her to open up her arms and give dark alchemy a great big hug.

The white lion chose her over Lotor because she was bright and accepted her fate for the future of everything she held dear. What became of her, and why did we only see this change truly take form with less than an hour of the entire series left?

[White Lion jumping around with Allura]

Thanks for Making it Through This Post

There are hundreds of other things that I could mention, and feel free to add on to this with your own opinions! I know this isn't exactly plot continuity but characterization continuity. I hope that is okay! If you want me to focus more on plot next time, let me know 😊

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sol1056 · 7 years ago

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How should now a fic writer handle Shiro's situation properly? I, personally, am one of those writers that believe that tragedy brings growth, and I was trying to write a fanfic in which Shiro is plagued by nightmares due to his time in the gladiator pits and, even though I plan on rewarding him narratively, I'm afraid on how a inexperienced writer like me should handle a character that's, well, already on thin ice. By the way, I love the way your explains stuff, its pretty enlightening for me.

Sorry it took so long to answer, life has been… a lot of try/fail cycle in the past few months. My guess is that by ‘situation’ you mean his PTSD? Well, the first step is to research. I’m serious. Start with wikipedia — just to get the broad sense of the issue — and follow the footnotes to more specific articles. If you have specific questions, you could try sending them to @scripttraumasurvivors or similar.

The second step is to think about why you need the tragedy.

I don’t mean, “so you can tell me and I can talk you out of it,” I mean, “so you know what you’re trying to say.” In the broadest sense, stories have two general types of catastrophes, and they do different things. (It’s more complex than that, but I’ll stick with generalities and if you have questions, just ask.)

Behind the cut: the two types, how they relate to change and flat arcs, and the use of tragedy.

before the story vs during the story

When a catastrophe happens at the very beginning or right before the story, it’s the instigating event. It kicks off the story, but it’s not necessarily the story’s main conflict. This is the one time you can get away with coincidence: it can be as simple as wrong place, wrong time, and bam, catastrophe for character.

When a catastrophe happens during the story, you need to steer clear of using coincidence to heap more bad on top of bad. The character has to be making choices that put them in the path of that bad, and then they need to learn from those choices.

catastrophe before a change arc

Shiro’s instigating event (where his story begins) is when Ulaz frees him. This throws Shiro out of one world (slavery) into a new world (freedom), where the old rules (fight for your life, trust no one, etc) no longer apply.

In a change arc, we’d look to that past wound (the trauma) as the source of Shiro’s lie. He would have learned something from that experience that kept him alive, and the story is about his path towards un-learning that. Your task as the writer would be to determine what his lie is, and — once the story strips that away — what his revealed truth will be.

You’ll need to give thought to what Shiro would’ve heard or felt the most during his imprisonment, and how that would affect him. Perhaps he had cellmates who turned on him, and he learned that trust makes you vulnerable. Or he was praised most when he maimed rather than killed, until he told himself he didn’t deserve to be happy after making so many others suffer.

The story, then, is the deconstruction of that lie; the try/fail cycle is the struggle between keeping that lie vs accepting a truth. The longer the character clings to their lie, the more the story should punish them. If nightmares are your chosen method for punishing Shiro, then you’d need to make sure those get worse and worse the longer Shiro clings to whatever lie he’s telling himself.

His midpoint (and breaking point) is when he realizes he can’t keep holding onto the lie. He has to walk away from the coping mechanisms that kept him alive, and figure out who he really is. If he backslides, then nightmares, but as long as he keeps pushing forward, he’ll get free of that cycle.

catastrophe before a flat arc

Shiro’s instigating event is when he meets the other (future) paladins and they find Blue, or possibly as late as when he meets Black. In this kind of arc, his PTSD is a facet of his experiences, but they’re not a punishment per se for truth or lie, anymore than his prosthesis is.

He begins the story with a truth — that he can somehow help bring Voltron back and defeat the empire — and the try/fail cycle is flipped. The character has the truth and the world has the lie. The more Shiro holds onto his truth, the harder the world (via the narrative) should punish him.

That means superficially the first half of his story looks much the same: he does something, has nightmares. But the driving force is different: he does his best to prove he’s a good and worthwhile person, and he’s knocked down/back.

For either arc, gradually, Shiro should reach the midpoint. In a change arc, this is when he discovers his truth. In a flat arc, this is when he reaffirms the truth he’s had all along. Hopefully you can see how nightmares work a little better in the flat arc, where nightmares could feel like an internalized voice of the world, pushing a lie on him; in a change arc, his instincts/subconscious should be pushing him away from the lie, not backwards into it. Make sense?

during the story

One thing I’d counsel you not to do is to show the nightmares. Instead, show the effects: exhaustion from not sleeping, waking with cold sweats, maybe behaviors like insomnia or reluctance to sleep alone (or anywhere near anyone else at all).

A nightmare is a hugely personal thing, and sometimes we can find utterly terrifying things that in the light of day (where the reader is, as they’re reading) sound almost silly. Leave the contents of a nightmare completely untouched, and the reader will happily fill in for you some horrendous visuals that would terrify them.

The other thing is that like I mentioned above, what happens during the story should be there to push the character in one direction or another, towards a goal. It’s not just set dressing; the character should be learning something from the experience.

That means you might need to think hard about what prompts the nightmares. In a change arc, that means Shiro has to choose or do something, actively, that then prompts the nightmare as a kind of narrative punishment. In a flat arc, the nightmares might get strongest when Shiro gets closer to establishing his truth.

In the first case, he learns that if he doesn’t do X (by some subtle connection, you don’t want to sledgehammer this), then the nightmares lessen. In the second case, he learns the opposite. How to put it… as in, the nightmares are a manifestation of his fight. In a change arc, he has to walk away from the lies that make him think he should fight; in a flat arc, he has to face the fight head-on and conquer his doubts/fears.

using tragedy

With the possible exception of Carol Berg (who has to be one of the biggest woobifiers in original fiction, even worse than George Martin), extreme woobifying is really a fanfic hallmark. The purpose isn’t the try/fail cycle so much as seeing how much a character can take before they fall (or rise).

Honestly, if VLD were well-written in regards to Shiro, everything he’d gone through would’ve had a narrative purpose that leads him to some final point. His premise as someone with a major time-stamped illness, an ex-boyfriend, his dreams, his captivity, whatever he experienced in the arena or in Haggar’s lab, his prosthesis, being cloned, dying, and on and on... All of it together should’ve had some meaning, some greater purpose. His pain should’ve had a place.

Instead, it’s just... more pain. Over and over.

Normally, fanfic is more likely to woobify characters like Pidge, Hunk, or Lance, who aren’t really tested all that deeply by the narrative. None of them are really ever pushed to their breaking point, so fanfic steps in to give it a shot. For Shiro --- undoubtedly tested repeatedly and with few long-lasting narrative rewards --- canon has already kinda woobified him to an unnatural degree. (Keith and Allura also, to a lesser degree.)

Which means if fanfic gives what canon doesn’t, then I’d suggest you look at the story with an eye towards delivering that purpose, that greater meaning. When Shiro experiences each tragedy, what does he learn from it, before he heads into the next one? And what does he choose not to learn (and why), such that this wrong choice precipitates the next tragedy?

Everything the narrative does, it should do for a reason. There must be something Shiro could’ve done to prevent something (at least once the story starts), such that he can learn that lesson and avoid the tragedy, the next time.

I’ll toss in an example since I made you wait so long (sorry). Look at whatever happened to Shiro at the end of S2. If the story had done its proper job with the stakes, we should’ve had warning of how things could go wrong in battle. Like, say, a previous fight where a particular type of weapon strikes and, say, vaporizes something. The team realizes that it needs to avoid that kind of strike, or the worst will happen.

Then, while fighting Zarkon, Shiro must balk in some way (or doubt or hesitate) and that sets off a chain reaction. Like, hrm, he hesitates on using the bayard, just long enough that Zarkon can get in that particular vaporizing strike. So Shiro doesn’t twist the bayard but instead leaps to block the strike so it doesn’t hit whomever --- and he’s vaporized.

In other words: it’s not Shiro’s protective instincts that were the wrong move, but whatever led to the situation that necessitated doing that. He hesitated, or wasn’t sure in some way --- which means preventing a repeat requires his certainty or willingness to act faster. There must legitimately be something he could’ve done, and learning that lesson should be key to his final victory.

#vld #voltron #characterization #writing #story structure #character arcs #sol thinks about stuff

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pr3ttym3ssy · 7 years ago

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Only Time Will Tell

Only Time Will Tell – A "Voltron: Legendary Defender" Fanfic / Pidge&Lance -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Authors Notes: This is my first published work, I've written before but never made it public. Decided to take a chance this time around.

This is a little head canon that came to me after the end of Season 7, specially with all the Plance scenes we were blessed with("DON'T YOU TOUCH HER!"). It takes place at the hospital during those flash forward scenes and I decided to fill in the blanks. Angsty and fluffy and just what I think we all need, Hope you like it, constructive criticism always welcomed. On with the story, Plance On! -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

White walls, that's what he first saw when he opened his eyes. His dreams in a form of PTSD keeping him from sleeping. All the images of those last couple of days, replaying in his mind. The reunion with his family, his little niece and nephew. Then, the Galra ship and his unconscious sister on the ground feet away from him. He was so ready to lay down his life and then he wakes from his lucid nightmare. Lance was so sure he was out and done for. He still felt the serge of adrenaline like muscle memory coursing through him. The vital indicator jumping and beeping irradicably at his change in heart rate. Trying to catch his breath and coaxing himself back to reality. A reality where he is safe, his family and friends were safe under the care of the Garrison. He lets that notion sink in, but he can't seem to get the tears to stop running down his face. He tries to no avail until he hears a soft knocking of knuckles against his hospital room door. Its dark, but the light from the moon against his windows brightens the room enough for it to glisten against a pair of glasses.

The tiny figure tiptoes into the room "Lance? You awake?" Katie's soft pixie like voice whispers at him.

"Yes Pidge, I am" he quietly sniffles and tries to blink away the remaining tears in his eyes. He doesn't want to worry his friend, so he tries to bring his free hand to his face and rubs his hand down in a one swiped motion. "Why are you awake?" he asks her.

"Can't sleep, just had a nightmare" he hears the melancholic sound of her voice and he understandingly smiles at her.

"Same here", they stay in silence for what feels like a minute before Lance finally speaks up again.

"Ya coming in?"

Katie flinches, "Oh… yea, sorry" she sheepishly smiles closing the door behind her. She trots over to his bed, the slapping of her bare feet on the cold floor indicating she didn't think to put on slippers. Must have been a pretty bad dream if it means she wasn't thinking enough to cover her feet to the cold. They were all still pretty worse for ware and catching a cold would be pretty bad on top of it all. He feels his bed shift under her body pressure, as she situates herself comfortably.

"Do you want to talk about it? Your dream I mean, penny for your thoughts?" she gives him a lopsided grin. He can now see her clearly, the moon lighting up her features softly. Intently staring at her, he begins to wonder when she grew up? In front of him was no longer the young man he had met at the Garrison 4 years ago. Before him was now this young lady by the name of Katie Holt, the young badass that had come into their life as a pure coincidence. No snark, no teasing, just genuine concern in her voice and she wanted to listen to him. Somehow he felt the lump in his throat return and a new wave of fresh tears prickling at his ducts. He pushed them down and stayed as strong as he could, he would not cry in front of her just yet.

"I dreamt about the battle, but my nightmare had started as a happy memory. My family, us clumped together on the ground like that. Pfft… we must have been quite the sight, but that's how we all are up in each other's personal space" he laughed at this. Pidge warmly smiles at his memory. They really were quite the sight, she knew he had family from how he once spoke of them, but not to that extent. They were a happy and wholesome group and more so now that they're youngest son had returned to them. His smile changed from happy to a sad look and he continued. ''Before I know it, I'm staring at the lifeless body of my sister Vero just inches from me. The Galra ship taking a nose dive right for her and all I can do is close my eyes, take a deep breath and just give up. Then…I wake up."

A tear falls to his fisted hand, he doesn't realize he's crying again until he feels the warm droplets fall. Katie touches his hand comfortingly reassuring him that he's okay again. "It was just a dream Lance, you're finally safe. We all are, and you don't have to be scared anymore."

Lance looks at her before he tells her, "this actually happened to me Pidge, except Red came and saved us in the nick of time." Katie's eyes go big and glassy at this new information. She didn't know that he was on the brink of sure death and that if it hadn't been for the Red Lion, he wouldn't be around to talk about it.

"Lance? This all really happened?", she said tears now pricking at her eyes.

"Yea, the Galra ship that had taken the nose dive for us had found our location and shot us out of the cruiser when we were on our way to our assigned location. When I came to, there was a ringing in my ears and I saw Veronica unconscious a couple of feet away from me. The only thing I could think of doing was take my Bayard, get my assault rifle and shoot the thing down. But, it was already taking a nose dive for us and I….I made my peace with it. With the fact that I would die so my sister could live.''

Katie was full on tears and quiet sobs. She couldn't believe that this had happened to him, no wonder he couldn't sleep. Who could sleep after all that emotional distress and after accepting death none the less. "I'm so sorry we couldn't be around. Christ, Lance y-you could have died, and we wouldn't have known about it. Shiro kept it all under wrap, he never mentioned anything in the intercom. If I had to think of a reason though maybe because he didn't want to distract us." Katie rubbed at her eyes to dry the tears.

"It's okay Pidgey. You're right, we are safe and for now we have to regain our strength and meditate so we can keep a leveled head." He rubbed her ducked head trying to hide her tears from him by looking down at her clenched fists.

She sniffled and slightly met his eyes. "Can I…can I hug you Lance? Please?", she said through her hiccuped sobs. A look of shock crossed his face but then his features changed. Smiling he nodded and extended his free hand. If this were any random moment, he would have found a way to tease her for wanting to hug him. This time however, was different because they had been through hell and back and the mere thought of him not being around actually scared her to death. She crawled over to him and fell against his chest. She wrapped her arms around his waist careful not to hurt his casted arm. "I'm glad your safe and alive Lance. I don't know what I would do without you."

Lance smirked at that, "I'm sure you would have been fine", he chuckled. Katie hugging him tighter at that remark.

"Lance you're my family too and I would have not been able to let it go so easily. I can't believe you would think so little of yourself. Please don't make me break your other arm." Rising-up from her position, she punched his good shoulder and got back to laying down on his chest.

"Ouch! Pidge geez…still healing here."

"Well stop saying stupid things, idiot'' she retorted back.

"Anyway, enough about my nightmare. Tell me about yours'. What woke you up?" Pidge stopped at this and began to think back a couple minutes ago when she woke in a cold sweat. She felt his hand lay gently against the back of her head, slightly trying to sooth her. This action brought her back to reality. She had calmed some now from her earlier crying. It amazed him that she was still embracing him, like he was the only thing tethering her to earth.

"I… I had a similar dream. Similar in notion, different circumstance. I swear my minds' messing with me. Its' not a coincidence I came here though. I dreamt that Ezor had hurt you. Like wounded you, when you attacked her to defend me. She hurt you badly and I just saw your lifeless body in front of me." He could feel the hot tears through his white shirt. "I was mad I couldn't fight back, she had me. Her yellow eyes bearing into my very core. I was frozen, stuck with all this anger inside me. Incapable of doing anything for you" she said between sniffles. "But my nightmares hold no comparison to what you went though." If she was being honest with herself, the act alone of defending her sparked something in her that laid dormant since that time he helped her find enough Gac inside the fountain at the space mall to buy her game console.

The moments they spent together and had fun were very special to her. It made her believe that she might be feeling more than just a friendship towards him. She would be lying to herself if she didn't admit she felt a twinge of affection for the young Cuban. He was easy on the eyes. They we're pools of bright Cerulean, and he was very selfless. Flirtatious demeanor aside, he stood for what he thought was right. Besides Keith, he was the only other Paladin to have a strong connection to two Lions for crying out loud. If that wasn't impressive, then she didn't know what was. In that moment she felt the arm that had been splayed on her in a hug, tighten around her.

"Pidgey, what do you mean your nightmares hold no comparison. Last time I remembered this wasn't a competition. Besides, I couldn't just stand there and let Zethrid and her goons do anything to you. She's right, we all do have a soft spot for you" he chuckled and laid his chin against her head. Katie's blush was creeping up her neck. She was thankful the only light now was that of the moon through the window, otherwise he would have totally seen what his words did to her. It couldn't be what she was thinking though. Lance wouldn't see her as anything else besides his close friend.

He had a massive crush on Allura, that Katie was sure hadn't subsided even when he knew that the princess had a thing for Lotor. It was obvious, they all saw it. She figured she wouldn't be able to tell him how she really felt. Katie or better yet Pidge was the kind of person that didn't beat around the bush and spoke her mind. Albeit without thinking sometimes, she remembered how she hurt Allura's feelings once. "Still awake Pidge? Are you okay?" his voice was soft, and his eyes were getting droopy.

They were still in a comfortable embrace, and she was getting sleepy too. "Still awake, but not for long. You're very comfy and I don't feel like going to sleep alone. Is…is this okay?" she asked carefully scared of rejection. Katie wanted to stay? She was still hugging him too? He had to be dreaming right?

Why was he feeling suddenly conscious that if she left he would be all alone with his thoughts and he did not want to relive that nightmare again. "I don't want to be alone either. But what about our families? I think my Mama' will be coming back in the morning to see me along with Veronica. I love my sister but, she's very much like you. Very smart, very inquisitive, and very intuitive and I would flip my quiznak if she thought we did anything besides sleep."

He was blushing at his comment, Katie saw it and she didn't believe it. The rosy tint on his handsome face was matching hers' now. She giggled, could have been the nervousness and giddiness rushing through her that she was this close to Lance. Could have been that he had effortlessly described her in three words, and that made her feel on cloud nine. So, he did notice her, what made her special. But no, it would be too good to be true. He wouldn't see her as anything else. "I will leave to my room at the crack of dawn. We still have some time to catch some shut eye. Besides, I wouldn't want to cause any trouble or confusion. Specially if Allura were to see me step out your room, it would ruin any chance you have with her." Lance looked at her at the mention of the princess.

He wasn't worried about that happening, it's true that Allura confused him to no end. First, she was flat out rejecting him and then next she was asking him to be careful while showing honest concern for his safety. It's true he had felt strongly for her but with time he pushed those feelings aside. You could only get rejected so many times til it finally clicked. Then there was that time she had needed comforting. They had found out that Lotor was a total fraud and had played them the whole time. Lance was just genuinely offering his comfort, not trying for anything romantic. Allura had made a mistake, and she had felt pretty cruddy about it.

"Why would I be worried about her? I'm honestly more worried that Veronica won't stop it with the questions if she were to see you. Believe it or not I am a gentleman and I don't just sleep with pretty ladies", he said matter of factly.

Did he just call her pretty? "Oh, of course not. You wine them and dine them, right?", she giggled. He found very quickly that he liked the sound of her laughter. He wasn't sure if it was the proximity to her or the fact that she had always intrigued him, but he liked this. This was easy, she wasn't complicated, and she was comforting.

The nightmare completely forgotten and now just talking with her was placing him in a state of serenity. "Yes, contrary to popular belief. I am a total gentleman." Katie laughed again and smiled. Hiding her joy over the fact he didn't worry much on Allura catching them.

"Okay good sir, I promise we will keep this interaction our little secret", she placed her index finger over her lips. Then It happened, Lance ever so gently brushed his lips over her forehead. She wasn't dreaming, this was actually happening. His hand gently cupping the back of her head, while he pressed his soft lips into a chaste kiss on her forehead.

"You got it, night Pidge," he leaned his cheek against her head.

"Katie, you can call me Katie. If you'd like that is, Pidge is fine too. I don't care whichever is fine." She was rambling at this point and he hugged her too him, to make her stop.

Stop she did, "okay Katie, good night and see you in a few."

"Night Lance," Katie setting her glasses on his night stand, settle in again. Comfortably against his chest with his arm wrapped around her. Her arm draped around his waist, happily drifting off to sleep. Content with how everything turned out. Lance now sound asleep, dreaming of the pretty girl in his arms. Her giggles and how well she fit against his frame. He had a lot to think about when the morning came around, because truth be told he was sure something sparked within him for Katie. Maybe there had always been something there. Only time would tell. For now, nightmares all forgotten, they fell into a deep sleep until the morning came.

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Well I hope you all like this, I will continue it. I chose to post it here because my Fan Fiction page is not working for me. I have to fix it, but once it is Ill will add this to that and continue from there.

Please feel free to add any tags I missed :D

Part 2

#plance #pidgegunderson #LanceMcClain #postseason7 #angst #fluffy #slowburn #voltron #voltron: legendary defender #flirtyrobot

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ptw30 · 7 years ago

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With his terminal illness, Shiro's fear of not being a good enough paladin has an even more tragic level. He's been scared of not being 'good enough' his entire life or at least the last few years, depending if the disease was viral or genetic (I lean towards genetic), and with PTSD on the side? ... Its sad. Lets also mention, he was dying so he thought he couldn't be the paladin he should have. Now he's free of affliction, he apparently CANT be a paladin anymore... not good for the self-esteem

Sorry. I know you sent this prior to the season, and I wanted to give you a good answer. I was hoping this season would allow me to write a great answer, but it didn’t.

And though Shiro seems to be comfortable in a command position on the Atlas, it really just showed that Shiro is no longer a paladin. Shiro doesn’t seem to really suffer from not being a part of the team but seems to have a fondness for the team he once lead/kinda still leads/I’m not quite sure what his role is other than to tell the paladins how to save Earth and the day but step aside for Keith to pilot Black.

Seriously. Other than Keith finding out the right point to strike at the end of the final battle, Shiro was the one who took them step-by-step through the season. He was the one who told them how to power Voltron and get home. He was the one who told them how to call the lions, which led to Hunk urging them to call the lions on Sendak’s battlecruiser.

…I’m sorry. Why is Shiro not the Black Paladin anymore and Keith in Red and Lance in Blue? Cuz the narrative never said. Where Keith used to back Shiro in Black, he didn’t ask Shiro to pilot Black, and Shiro didn’t talk about why he wasn’t back in Black.

So…the series never really said why Shiro isn’t the Black Paladin anymore.

#voltron #vld season 7 #shiro #black paladin #onetrueblackpaladin #keith #lance #lion swap #knightofacherus #answered

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wildzinkyu · 7 years ago

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(long post, VLD season 7 spoilers, I'm on mobile so I can't really do a page break I'm sorry about that guy's!) (art is mine btw) I'm honestly getting really tired of hearing how Adam dying in season 7 is a bury your gays trope, and condemning VLD as this aweful thing for allowing it. Yes, Adam was mlm, and yes, he did die. And maybe yeah, they could have chosen to kill someone else, but in the end, it isn't going to change the narrative to do so. Adam's death was included to show how high the stakes were in the war against the Galra. He was used because he was a familiar face, so we would connect with what was happening. Adam's character wasn't all that important in the larger narrative of the show, either. He was included for several reasons. First, to show in an organic was that Shiro, a main character, was mlm. Second, to contrast his relationship specifically with Keith- almost all of Adam's lines are directly echoed by Keith, Adam saying he won't stay with Shiro if he leaves for Kerberos, vs Keith saying he refuses to give up on Shiro no matter what. And third, as already mentioned, to give us a familiar face in the first assault against the Galra to show how high the stakes were. Adam isn't the only character to die, he dies with his entire squad, and showed JUST how underprepared Earth was for the Galra. On top of this, so much focus on a character who got less than a minute of screen time, starts to overshadow why Adam was even thought of as a character in the first place: to show Shiro was mlm. Shiro, who is a MAIN character in an action adventure series. They did not have to make Shiro gay. And let's really talk about Shiro, OK? Shiro is not only one of the main characters. He's a character who has gone through so much, and keeps going. He's Asian, disabled, mentally ill (ptsd) and mlm, and he's also strong, a leader, someone who cares about and supports his friends, a talented leader, and he keeps going. He's literally DIED, and been dragged back to a living body by the love of another member of his team (Keith). Shiro is a gay man who belongs to an Earth military organization and allowed to be out and gay (this is so important considering don't ask don't tell). Shiro is amazing. Shiro is so wonderful as lgbt+ rep, and it makes me so sad and so tired to see him overshadowed by Adam. And to say that Adam's death means that Shiro now has no one to come home to on earth... Well, Adam LEFT Shiro before Shiro left on the Kerberos mission, prior to the start of the show. Even if Adam were alive, they weren't going to get together again. The showrunners have been very clear about that. Adam being alive wasn't going to give Shiro a 'happy ending'. Shiro's 'happy ending' doesn't have to hing on him being in a relationship. Right now, he already has the start of his happy ending- he's been shown to have achieved his goals and more, and now has a found family in the Voltron team around him who love and support him. I am certain that season 8 is going to be good for Shiro! And we know the VLD showrunners had to fight to make Shiro gay. They've told us they wanted the flashbacks in S7 to happen back in S2, but weren't allowed to. We know that DW made them record alternate lines for the flashback with Adam, casting him as a roommate best friend, and not as a romantic partner. Knowing they had to do that, fight and convince their executives that yes, they should make Shiro gay, really does make a difference, and shows how much they do care about their fan base. And yes, it would be awesome to see Shiro end up with someone in S8. But this is an action adventure show, where romance is NOT the focus. And as a fan and as a queer person, I appreciate that Shiro is allowed to just BE gay, that it's just one part of him. And if Adam was alive, I don't think I'd want to see him get back together- not only did they break up prior to the series start, but Adam is someone we know next to nothing about. If Shiro DOES end up with someone, I could only hope that it's someone we already know in the series, and that we've been allowed to see have development with Shiro. But even if Shiro remains single... Shiro is still amazing rep. Again, he's disabled, mentally ill, Asian, and gay, and still strong, still GOING... Him being gay doesn't doesn't hinge on him being WITH someone. And all of this outrage over Adam, who again, had less than a minute of screen time, is really starting g to overshadow the fact that we now have a gay main character, and that the showrunners had to fight for that. I'm glad they did. I love Shiro. I love that HE'S our lgbt+ rep. And I want to thank the VLD staff for doing that. I want to add as well that, I'm not saying people can't be upset about Adam, but just that I hope people consider everything involved, and that they just be aware that this seems to be getting more traction than the fact that we now have a main character in an action adventure series who is gay and who isn't cast as some kind of stereotype. Who is strong, a leader, and surrounded by a found family who genuinely care for him.

#Vld #Voltron #Adam discourse #takashi shirogane #Shiro #Pls I am so tired and about as salty as Shiro looks in my art up there

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voltorb-graveyard · 7 years ago

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unpopular voltron opinions @ 3am

why did we collectively think lance was gonna be the black paladin?

like looking back at it, it really didn’t make any sense. he was still feeling shaky in his role as “sharpshooter” so he really wasn’t about to lead 4 other people into different battles…

klance is a cool bromance but it’s not endgame material

i finally said it out loud, nice.

first of all, sheith was never okay to ship. whether we had the official ages during the first season or not, there was clearly a maturity difference b/w them

secondly, y’all were really out here feening for that weird shit so badly that they actually had to throw in the line “you’re like a brother to me”; not to mention they had to do it again in the 6th season because y’all wanna still be out here acting like crackheads

what allura did to shiro was really fucked up. he never asked to have his soul transferred into his literal clone’s that tried to kill his brother and friends

did it seem nice atm? sure. but is this nice feeling gonna last? more than likely not.

shiro didn’t tell anyone when he was experiencing flashbacks let alone that he had ptsd, so y’all know he’s really not gonna mention that being in his clone’s body is fucking him up

allurance is…not good

lance repeatedly flirted with allura even when she was clearly uninterested and even if she had become interested, she didn’t give him a shot until after lotor was revealed/confirmed to not be an option

(i can’t tell if after a while she just decided to stop trying to fight lance’s advances or she just genuinely didn’t care anymore)

punk is the cutest brotp @ me if you want

i want some more shatt material @dreamworksanimation

lotor was wrong for killing narti and that’s when we should’ve known he was a shady fuck

another cute sibling duo? season 1& 2 allura and shiro

i’m tired of watching the same damn 54 second transformation sequence

i want words to sing along to at the beginning of each episode

i can’t keep singing drum beats

if the team returns to earth and it hasn’t been like 3 or 4 years since they left, i am going to throw hands with the writers

speaking of throwing hands with the writers, there was a character from the first season that i wanted to see again but i forget who it was

if shiro wasn’t a whole ass grown man, shallura c/would’ve been cute, ❌🧢

i want an episode dedicated to my space uncle, coran!

another reason lotura would’ve never worked: lotor is an emotionally abusive, manipulative fucker

is2g if keith’s dad’s name is some hillbilly redneck fuckshit i might cry

keith named his space wolf “dog”

#i'll probably add more to this later #but for right now take these #i'm open for discussion #hc #headcanon #voltron headcanons #voltron hc #vld headcanons #vld hc #voltron

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ao3feed-safeklance · 6 years ago

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In our bedroom after the war

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2rOj3l2

by Apple_cheesecake9

Set one year after the war that almost destroyed every reality.

Lance is still grieving for Allura, spreading the word about her and living a simple life as a farmer with his family.

Meanwhile, Keith is working to give humanitarian aid to those who need it, going around the universe.

In the anniversary of Allura's death and the end of the war, team Voltron comes together to celebrate and remember.

Words: 487, Chapters: 1/?, Language: English

Fandoms: Voltron: Legendary Defender

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: Gen, M/M, Multi

Characters: Lance (Voltron), Keith (Voltron), Pidge | Katie Holt, Hunk (Voltron), Shiro (Voltron), Coran (Voltron), Allura (Voltron), Lotor (Voltron), Voltron Paladins

Relationships: Keith/Lance (Voltron), Curtis/Shiro (Voltron), Allura & Lance (Voltron)

Additional Tags: Season/Series 08 Spoilers, Im going to try and make it right, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Altean Lance (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), Season 8 made me sooo mad, Lance deserves better, Slow Burn, Im going to give what the writers won't give us, bonding moment, Mentions of PTSD, Korean Keith (Voltron), Cuban Lance (Voltron)

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2rOj3l2

#ao3feed #fanfic #voltron #klance

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littlewhitetie · 7 years ago

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Collect Call

“Yeah?”

It’s not like Lance is expecting a warm, fuzzy greeting from Keith, but the brusque tone still gives him room to hesitate. Maybe calling Keith was a bad idea. How, exactly, did he talk himself into this, again?

The boy on the screen is wearing his old black t-shirt instead of his Marmora uniform; his bad hair is even messier than usual. “Did—did I wake you up?” Lance asks.

“Yes.”

“Oh, sorry!” Lance squeaks. Lance isn’t supposed to squeak—especially with Keith, of all people. Confidence, confidence. Lance needs to get it together.

“Did you need something?”

Yes, but for once, Lance’s words have left him. What’s he supposed to say? Hey Keith, I want you to come home because I feel like something might be wrong with Shiro, but I can’t even figure out what the problem is—if there’s even a problem to begin with. Hey Keith, I want you to come home because I’m not you, and Shiro won’t talk to me again, no matter how hard I try. Hey Keith, I want you to come home because I miss you, and I don’t want to deal with this alone.

Nope, not happening. “I—I can call back later.”

Keith frowns. “Something wrong?”

Maybe. “No, I was just, y’know, wondering how you’re doing,” he says, aiming for casual and missing the mark completely.

Keith raises an eyebrow. “Since when do you care?”

Lance recoils, but he relaxes a bit when he sees the corner of Keith’s mouth quirk up—it’s not actually an accusation.

“Couldn’t find anyone else on the ship to talk to, huh? You’ve gotta be desperate if you called me just to chat.”

“Ha, yeah.” Not completely untrue—‘Team Punk’ (so uncool) is working with Coran on upgrading the ship’s power system, Allura and Lotor are discussing weird Altean magic stuff together (but not together together, because no way), and Shiro is… well, Lance doesn’t know what Shiro’s up to, because he doesn’t actually tell any of them. He’s more distant than ever.

“Things are good here,” Keith says. “What’ve you guys been up to?”

The response catches Lance off guard. Keith actually wants to chat? …Okay. He can do this. “Well, uh, where should I start? When’s the last time you talked to any of us?”

“A while ago. Probably before Zarkon was defeated.”

“You serious? That was ages ago. You really haven’t talked to anyone since then? …Not even Shiro?”

“No,” Keith confirms.

“I would’ve thought you guys would be talking all the time.”

“No, not in a while.”

“Any reason…?” Lance is being far from subtle, but it is Keith he’s talking to.

“Just haven’t had much time.”

“Yeah. Kolivan’s got you working hard, I bet.”

“Yeah. Lots of missions and stuff. But… Lance, I—I found my mother.”

Lance’s jaw drops. “No way. That’s amazing, Keith!”

Keith has always been hard to read when it comes to any emotion that isn’t anger, but the omnipresent crease in his brow has smoothed out; his eyes are soft. He’s happy. It’s been months since Lance has seen him wear anything even resembling a real smile. How can Lance ruin this moment for him, especially with a problem that might not even be real?

“Yeah. Her name’s Krolia. She’s a member of the Blade. I’ve been learning a lot from her—I actually have a mission with her tomorrow.”

“That’s awesome, man. Are you allowed to tell me what you guys are up to?”

“I don’t see why not.” Keith pauses. “Well, I do, but this is a secure line, and I know I can trust you.”

Something about that sends a shiver down Lance’s spine. Trust. So much of Voltron is built on trust. But lately…

“You alright, Lance?”

“Yeah, yeah! I’m good. Sorry, just zoned out there for a minute,” Lance says. “So, mission tomorrow. Tell me about it. Tell me about your mom. What’s she like? Is she purple? Is she as grumpy as you? …Is she hot?”

The dynamic of their conversation falls into familiar territory, laced with harmless jabs. Keith tells Lance about some of the missions he’s been on. Lance talks about finding Pidge and Matt’s dad, the adventures they had with the sentry Pidge and Hunk had reprogrammed, and all the cool stuff Allura’s been doing. He keeps it light and glosses over anything to do with Shiro.

Eventually, Keith interrupts Lance’s numbered list of reasons Lotor is a prick. “Okay, I get it, he’s a jerk. I should probably get some sleep before the mission tomorrow. But thanks for filling me in on everything that’s been going on. I appreciate it.”

Lance bids him goodnight, and the screen vanishes. He sighs, posture slumping. He should’ve said something. “You had one task,” he mutters to himself.

His fingers hover over the touchpad as he deliberates calling Keith back. But that would be stupid; he should let him sleep. Let him spend time with his mom, catching up on nineteen years of lost time. This maybe-or-maybe-not-a-problem has waited this long; it can wait a little longer. It’s probably nothing, anyway.

But what if…?

In the end, Lance decides to leave him a message. “Glad we could catch up. I’m sure the others would love to hear from you too—you should call Shiro when you get a chance. Good luck on the mission tomorrow. Let me know how it goes.”

He hits send, and then heads off to pester Hunk and Pidge. He’ll figure out how to bring up what he meant to later; he’s got time to figure it out.

…

…Or not. Lance isn’t expecting Keith to call him back the very next day.

“You said to let you know how the mission went, didn’t you?” Keith says, when it’s clear he’s caught Lance off guard.

“Yeah, I didn’t think you actually would, though,” Lance admits. His insecurities slip through before his brain can catch up. “Didn’t think you’d actually want to keep talking to me if you didn’t have to.”

Keith looks a bit like he’s been struck. “I—I’m sorry if I—”

“No, wait, wait, I didn’t mean it like that,” Lance backtracks. “Sorry. You’re good. We’re good. It’s just, not everyone wants to talk to me these days. Have you—have you called Shiro yet?”

“Not yet.”

“Why not?”

Keith doesn’t answer right away.

It’s the opening Lance needs. He doesn’t want to, but he presses onward anyway. “Keith, why didn’t you come back?”

“Come back from…?”

“You left us to go on a mission to track down Lotor. But after we found him—or he found us—you didn’t come home. Now he’s here, and you’re still out there. Why?”

It’s not like Voltron was still doing ice shows (much to Lance’s chagrin). Up until recently, when they started playing the ‘let’s cater to Lotor’s every whim’ game, they’d been doing the kind of stuff Keith lived for. Big, front line, action-y stuff—rescuing people and fighting bad guys and all that. Keith would’ve loved flying through those lava tunnels.

Keith doesn’t have an answer for Lance. “I…”

“Was it because of Shiro?”

Keith blanches, giving him away. “What? No! Of course not—”

“Because I wouldn’t blame you if it was.”

“W-why would you think…”

“Shiro’s been acting weird,” Lance says. “It’s been a gradual thing, and looking back, it started quite some time ago. I’m guessing you saw it before any of us.”

“I don’t… what do you mean? Weird how?”

“Weird like he’s distant, and harsh. Really harsh, sometimes. He snaps at us. He pulls rank to get his way, and does stuff without consulting us first. He’ll apologize afterward sometimes, but it’s never a real apology—like, I’m sorry if your feelings were hurt but I’m still right. He doesn’t respect our decisions. Undermines them. It’s like we’re just subordinates, not part of a team… Like we’re means to an end, instead of his friends. And it—it hurts, you know?”

The lighting is low, but Lance can still catch the way Keith’s eyes glisten from behind the screen. “I know,” Keith whispers.

“When did you first notice?” Lance asks, softly.

“…After he escaped from the Galra the second time, I guess. But it was only with me. I assumed it was just because I was being such a shitty leader.”

“You weren’t,” Lance shakes his head. “Different, maybe, but not bad.”

“Well, I made a lot of calls he didn’t agree with, and he wasn’t happy about it. Not to mention I’d taken the Black Lion from him. Leading Voltron and flying the Black Lion? That’s, like, everything to him. I thought having that back would help him. And he was only really like how you described when he was around me. So, I guess I thought maybe he’d be better off if I wasn’t around.”

Lance winces. “You honestly thought that?”

“I… I don’t know,” Keith says. “Maybe leaving wasn’t the right call.”

“No, it wasn’t,” Lance says. “Not for that reason, anyway. I mean, it’s awesome you found your mom, and that probably wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t been with the Blades. But, Keith, no. You’re important to him. To all of us. We miss you, man.”

Keith ducks his head. He sidesteps responding directly, instead saying, “So if it wasn’t me, what do you think it is? …Could it be trauma? His—his PTSD or whatever getting worse?”

Lance had suspected Shiro might have PTSD, but he didn’t know the full extent of it. “Maybe. He was already having memory issues, right? And flashbacks.”

“He was barely sleeping, had nightmares when he did… Had panic attacks, sometimes,” Keith divulges. “He was way more on edge than before and, yeah, more distant. He—he didn’t come back the same the first time he escaped, either. So, I don’t know, maybe the second time just…”

“I… I didn’t know it was that bad,” Lance admits. “That could explain a lot of the recent stuff. At least from what I remember about PTSD from that health course back at the Garrison, the increased distance, the aggression, the outbursts, the recklessness… that could all be part of it.”

Keith’s eyes are wide and he’s… trembling. “Then he was… and I just…” He wraps his arms around himself. “I shouldn’t have—”

“Hey, listen,” Lance says, before Keith can spiral. “I know we’re no substitute for you, but he’s not alone here. He still has the rest of us. He… he came to talk to me, once, about some stuff that was bothering him. And… I feel like there might be more to it. There might be something else going on.”

“He… came to talk to you?” Keith looks concerned.

“Hey, I know I’m not you, but it’s not like I can’t—”

“No, it’s just… he doesn’t do that with anyone unless something’s really wrong.”

Lance can count the number of times Shiro’s confided in him on one hand. With one finger. And while he’d been glad Shiro had opened up to him… maybe it’s worse than he thought.

“So what’d he say?”

“Well he told me about these headaches he’s been having.”

“Yeah. He’s been having them since he escaped from the Galra the second time. He said it was probably the lack of sleep catching up to him, not to mention all the concussions he’s had.”

“Okay, but he said they feel ‘weird’, and more recently, he’s been noticing a pattern. He said they get worse before a mission.”

“Leading missions is stressful,” Keith offers.

“Specifically when he’s making a decision. One that goes against what other people are saying.”

Keith frowns at that.

“Like when we said going to the Kral Zera would be way too risky so we weren’t going to go along with it, so Shiro decided he’d go behind our backs and bring Lotor there himself.”

Keith’s frown deepens. “I was wondering why you hadn’t told us about that plan, and why you sent him there without backup. That was really dangerous. We weren’t expecting any of you guys to be there. We almost blew the entire place up. They would’ve been caught in the explosion if I hadn’t deactivated a bunch of the bombs.”

“Yeah. And this was right after he’d given Lotor his bayard during the prisoner exchange I told you about. Also without telling us.”

“He… why would he—?”

“I’m worried, Keith.”

From the tension in Keith’s jaw, it’s clear Lance isn’t alone in the sentiment. “Has he told you anything else?”

“He… he only talked to me the one time. He’s back to shutting the rest of us out; I can’t get through to him again. But that one time, he said that sometimes he feels like he’s not himself. And from the way he was talking, it didn’t sound like a metaphor. He said it feels like he’s not always in control. He—he sounded scared, Keith.”

“I’ll… I’ll come back.”

Lance wants Keith to come back. He does. But… “But you just found your mom.”

“Yeah,” Keith says, wilting slightly. “She’s my mother. But you guys are my… I can always go back if they need me, but right now, this is more important. The Blade will understand—if there’s something bigger at play here, I need to help figure it out. And Shiro—Shiro’s always been there for me. I have to be there for him.”

“I… yeah. I’m sorry I couldn’t take care of this myself. I don’t know what to do anymore,” Lance admits.

“No, I shouldn’t have left this on your shoulders. Thanks for looking out for him, and the rest of the team. …I’m glad you called.”

“Yeah. Yeah, me too.”

…

Red is more than capable of retrieving Keith on her own, but it’s probably a good thing Lance came along. When Keith steps into the cockpit, he brings with him a tidal wave of emotions. Guilt, regret, fear, sorrow.

“Hey, man.” Lance gets out of the pilot seat, putting a hand on Keith’s shoulder. Feeling the minute tremors under his red paladin armour, Lance does away with his inhibitions and pulls him into a hug. “I’m sorry you have to leave your mom so soon after finding her.”

Keith shakes his head. “No, I… I shouldn’t have left Voltron in the first place. I should’ve come back sooner. What if—”

“Hey. It’s gonna be alright,” Lance soothes. “Shiro’s gonna be fine.”

The words are for his own comfort as much as Keith’s, and Lance isn’t sure he even really believes them. Keith might not believe them either, but he relaxes a fraction and says, “Yeah. You’re right. Thanks for coming to get me.”

“Of course. I’m glad you’re coming home.” He holds fast, and Keith’s tension slowly bleeds away. “Everything’s going to be okay. We’ll figure this out together.”

(Update: you can read part two here)

#voltron #voltron legendary defender #fanfic #hurt/comfort #platonic klance #keith #lance #littlewhitetie writes #my idea well is dry #if you have fic ideas please hit me up #writing

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ahumanintraining · 7 years ago

Text

every day, the same dream Every day, he wakes up starving — like he hasn’t eaten in years. — shallura, if you squint.

mentions of: ptsd, guns notes: everyone's asking where's shiro and we all hope it's somewhere resting, but here i am writing this... (also if you haven't heard of the 2009 flash short game that shares the same title as this piece, i would recommend you do so and watch a play through (it takes like 4.5 minutes on 2x speed). it's kinda interesting.) read on ao3

Today, he wakes up starving — like he hasn’t eaten in years.

He clutches his stomach, wincing, and notices his tank top is drenched in sweat and his blankets and sheets have been kicked down to the floor.

A nightmare?

He grimaces, swinging his legs off his mattress and standing to his feet. He bends back down and throws the bedding back onto the mattress where they belong, not bothering to straighten out his bed. Clumsily, he stumbles to the other side of his studio, letting the blood come back into his head as he waits for the black curtain over his vision to fade. He reaches forward for the handle of the refrigerator, opening it wide.

The cold air wafts over his body. There’s nothing in the refrigerator.

He swallows, feeling the edge of another growl in his stomach coming. His mouth fills with bitter spit. He needs to get something in him before he drops dead.

He spots an empty cup on the counter, next to an orange prescription bottle. He steps forward, taking the bottle in his left hand and reading over the instructions:

Take once daily.

Right. He takes this every day in the morning.

He shakes the bottle, seeing one small blue pill rattling around inside. He looks back at the glass cup, seeing some dried trails of water around its rim. He thinks briefly, then rinses out the glass in the sink, and fills it with tap water. He slams the bottle down onto the counter, his left palm over the cap, and twists his wrist. The bottle opens with a satisfying click, and he tips the remaining pill into his bottle, washing it down with a few gulps of water.

He looks around his room, his head still pounding. He feels hungover, but there is no trace of alcohol in the anywhere. He must have been out late, or something.

There’s a paper on the desk, and he staggers over to it, reading it:

Doctor appointment today.

Things start to clear in his mind. He thinks slowly to himself, making a list in his head as he falls back to his bed. He sits back onto the mattress and falls to his side, staring at the wall in front of him. What does he need to do today? See the doctor, refill his prescriptions, and get some fucking food for the refrigerator…

“Shiro.”

He closes his eyes, smothers his face in one hand, and groans. Fuck, what is this voice in his head? Who is this voice? Why does she call his name like she knows him, like she has known him?

And suddenly her voice, so close —

“Shiro?”

His reaction is automatic. He grabs for the gun under his pillow, offs the safety, rests his index finger on the trigger and points. In front of him, a woman with white hair, brown skin, pointed ears, and pink crescents under her eyes.

“You again,” he mutters to himself.

He keeps the gun raised high, aimed at her face. His arm shakes — but he’s sure that is because the gun is in his non-dominant hand, and not at all because she looks so damn familiar.

She raises her hands to him, shielding herself. “Don’t shoot!” she tells him. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

“I never asked if you were going to,” he replies. He cocks the gun again. “Who are you?”

Her eyebrows furrow, and she gives him a glassy stare. She looks once down the barrel of the gun but immediately comes back to his eyes. She isn’t scared of him.

Why not?

Maybe there’s more to read in her eyes, but right now, his mind is too clouded to decipher it.

“Listen to me, Shiro,” she continues calmly. “You’re not in a good place right now. I’m here to help you get out.”

“Help me?”

“Yes,” she affirms, nodding her head. “We don’t have much time,” she says, stepping toward him. “We have to go. Come with me.”

He frowns. “You never answered my question. Who are you?”

She bites her bottom lip. “A friend,” she replies. “Now, come on. Get up.”

She takes another step toward him, entering the limits of his personal space. He leans back into his bed and waves his gun in front of her as reminder.

“Who are you?” he repeats.

“We don’t have time for this,” she urges. “I don’t have much quintessence left, and we still have to get you out of here.”

“Here?”

She inhales sharply. “You’re stuck between two planes of reality right now. Like you’re in limbo. You’ve been stuck here for many phoebs.”

He lets his gun fall onto his lap, but keeps his finger on the trigger. “I have no idea what the fuck you’re talking about.”

“I’ve been trying to get you back,” she explains, a little more desperately. “For a long time now.” Her hands clasp together. “Please, just listen to me, Shiro. Please.”

“You even know my name,” he groans, getting up from his bed. He slips past the woman and walks to the window. He stares outside for a moment, passively watching the traffic and the pedestrians walking on the sidewalk four or five stories below.

He turns his head back to her. She looks back at him with a somewhat confused expression.

He translates for her. “You’re not real,” he tells her, tapping the side of his forehead with his gun. “You’re just in my head.”

Her eyes widen. “No, no, I’m real,” she says. “You’re real, too. But this… place that you’re in isn’t real. You have to believe me.” She steps toward him, looking beyond his shoulder. “All of this,” she continues. “This entire apartment and what’s going on outside — don’t you realize it’s the same every morning? This is just a place built out of your memories from Earth.”

He throws his gun onto the nightstand, not listening. He walks past her again, toward the bathroom. He needs to get ready. He recites his plans for the day in his head again: See the doctor, refill his prescriptions, and get some fucking food for the refrigerator…

“Shiro,” she calls for him, following behind him.

He reaches for the jacket that hangs messily over the back of a chair, hanging it over his shoulder. The faster he leaves, the faster he escapes these illusions. His apartment is haunted of them.

“Shiro,” she says again, voice stronger. He doesn’t respond, walking around her again to head to the door. “Shiro! Please! Listen to me!”

She reaches out for him, grasping his wrist — but then immediately retracting her hand back to her body when she misses, suddenly realizing that his right arm is not there.

He turns around, looking at her. He sees her shocked eyes.

“I’m sorry. I forgot that you…”

He shakes his head. “Even if I did, you wouldn’t have been able to touch me anyway,” he replies. He lifts his left hand and shoots it out in front of him, through her torso. His hand completely goes through her, and her body flickers. “See?” he continues, pulling his hand back. “You’re not real.”

“No, no, Shiro, I… I just… I’m real but I’m projecting myself into this plane. It’s why you can hear and see me. But my physical body isn’t there,” she explains. She hesitates, and then adds, “And the last time I saw you, you had a prosthetic. You weren’t proud of it, but it was another hand I could hold.”

He considers her points, tilting his head to the side. Rationalization is a technique he’s been taught to effectively ward off the unreal. If he outreasons them, they will break and never bother him again.

“So, by your logic, there wouldn’t be a point in trying to reach out for my arm in the first place,” he replies simply.

“I know,” she says, swallowing. “I… I’m trying everything I can. I wish I had enough power to touch you, but this is the limit of my power and ultimately this is a place you’ll need to convince yourself to get out of.” She looks up at him, and he thinks he sees tears along the rims of her eyes. Her voice trembles. “I can help you with everything else, but first I need you to be convinced that this… all this around you isn’t real. I don’t know where your real body is, but I was able to locate your soul, and it’s stuck here. We just have to get your mind out of his space and then you can come back to us… back to Voltron… to me.”

His mouth twists, unable to pick apart her story. “You’re not making sense,” he finally says, giving up. “I lost my arm in war.” His voice lowers. “I’m not planning on losing my mind either.”

“You have to believe me! Please!” she begs him again. “I just need you to concentrate on what you remember, not what’s around you. Remember the Black Lion? Remember Keith, Lance, Pidge, Hunk, Coran? Remember me?”

He looks at her for a long time. “No,” he replies.

And perhaps that’s the right answer, because once he says this, her body fades into the morning light until he’s standing with no one but himself.

“You’ve been keeping up with your medications,” his doctor says.

Shiro nods, resting his forearm on his left thigh. He sits on the edge of his chair, tapping both his feet onto the ground every now and then.

“Why don’t you make yourself comfortable?” When Shiro looks up, his doctor motions with a hand. “Sit back a bit. We’re not going anywhere soon.”

He shakes his head. “It’s okay. I’m good,” he replies. He looks down at the floor, following the ridges of the hardwood floor.

“You seem tense,” the doctor observes. “How’s your sleep?”

“I’m sleeping,” he replies.

“Nightmares?”

He shrugs. “I don’t think so. I don’t remember.”

The doctor nods, jotting something down on a notepad. “That’s better than the last time you checked in. What about hallucinations?”

Shiro flinches. “What about them?”

“Are you still experiencing them?”

He thinks back to this morning. “Yeah…” he replies.

“Do you want to talk about them?”

He stumbles on the words. “No… it’s just… things saying that this isn’t real.”

“What’s not real?”

“…Everything.”

“Who’s telling you that? Your voice or someone else’s?”

“Someone else… I don’t know her.”

He doesn’t add any more detail.

“I see,” the doctor replies after a moment. “These kinds of experiences are very normal in people living with PTSD.”

“I know.”

Some more silence passes. “You mentioned you keep a gun at your bedside. We talked a little bit about that last time.”

“Yeah,” he says. “I… I know nothing is going to happen but it’s just for my own comfort.”

“I understand,” his doctor says. “I do need to ask if you store it in a safe place, however. Or if you use gun locks.”

Briefly, he remembers how automatically he pulled out his gun this morning and pointed it at a woman that meant him no harm.

“No,” he admits, and then adds, “I need to do that.”

The doctor nods. “You were talking about phantom pain last time. Are you still experiencing that?”

Shiro looks down to his right side, where no right forearm lay on his lap. “Not really,” he replies. “Just every now and then it feels like something brushes against it.”

He doesn’t mention that he actually felt it when the woman from his hallucination grasped his wrist.

It was the only reason he knew she reached out to touch him in the first place — the only reason why he turned around and didn’t just walk out the door.

His doctor hums in understanding. “That’s also very normal.”

Is it?

Is it normal his hallucinations become more real as the days pass? Is it normal that his hallucinations remind him on a daily basis that the world he is living in is not real?

Either he’s becoming more crazy or more sane.

He can’t tell the difference.

When he returns home, he carefully looks around the room to search for any trace of a woman with white hair, brown skin, pointed ears, and pink crescents under her eyes.

Nothing.

He takes a slow breath in and out. She was just a fucking hallucination.

He throws his things onto the counter — the refilled prescriptions and some granola bars he picked up from the pharmacy on his way back — before he tosses off his jacket onto the back of a chair and throws himself back into bed.

Will he ever be free? How long will it take for him to recover? How long until these nightmares and these illusions go away? How long until Allura —

Allura?

Why does that name suddenly come to him? Who is that? How does he know that name?

The answer never comes to him, but he eventually falls asleep.

Today, he wakes up starving — like he hasn’t eaten in years.

He clutches his stomach, wincing, and notices his tank top is drenched in sweat and his blankets and sheets have been kicked down to the floor.

A nightmare?

notes: I never specified a gender for Shiro’s doctor. ;)

#shallura #shallurangst #shiro x allura #shiro #allura #voltron #mention of ptsd #mention of guns #basically a weird theory of where's shiro #...somewhere in limbo #hehehehehe #—shallura #—voltron

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