#the lives of the few -while important- cannot outweigh the lives of the many

[reinelefey]

This is the issue I have with Tumblr and the "mobility" of any actual movement here.

Part of me hates being the person who writes what comes next, as I know the backlash that will come with it. Please read this, and sit with it, and think about it.

Before we begin: I am chronically ill. I have the lovely h-EDS, AuAdhd, POTS, and MCAS combo. I am a FREQUENT patient at hospitals, and have had 13 pulmonary embolisms as of this writing. (Blood clots blocking off portions of my lungs, and also quite likely to kill you.) I am one of the patients you speak of. I am the one with crumbling teeth who still must eat while I pull shards of bone from the mouth with needlenose pliers because dental care costs money I don't have, if I want to have somewhere to live, and something for my family to eat. I do not have access to pain meds on demand, nor doctors, because I do not have insurance that can pay for it, because despite being chronically ill, the government decided to remove my coverage with ZERO warning about doing so leaving me with my last hospital bill of 45k to pay OUT OF POCKET. I work, and struggle to survive because I "do not qualify" for aid from the government. I desired an idealogical revolution. I hoped if we could just SHOW them how much we need what they deny us, we could make our government care. But we can't. They don't. We don't have the money the corporations have. The truth is, the people no longer lead their government, as we are meant to do. The corporations do, and they do not care for people.

You see, the issue here is that the OP has a point. You cannot tell someone your life is worth more than theirs because no one's life is more valuable than another. That's not how it works.

But a further issue is that though the OP has a point, as do you.... It is also a non point.

The revolutionaries will not have guns aimed at your hospitals, will not cut the power to them. Because we fight for those in the hospitals, we fight for those to sick to fight for themselves, too weak, too scared. That's the thing.

Right now, we have TRIED peace. We have TRIED protests, we have TRIED voting. But in a system where the oppression is BUILT INTO the system, the only way that we can change things is to change the system. The government does not want to allow that because this current system benefits them so much.

This IS going to come down to a fight. I'm sorry, but at this point it is an inevitability, if we actually intend to progress to a point where we are able to sustain this country.

So the point now is to figure out how this CAN be done with the lowest number of casualties. You see, I don't think my life means more than any other life. But I do think that the life and security of the whole is greater than the one.

People are dying in the streets. People are dying in hospitals. People are Dying because the government is not allocating enough funds to healthcare.

We do not fight because we want your patients to die. I myself am chronically ill, and am unfortunately a frequent flyer at my local hospital because of it. Without the blood thinners I take daily, my lungs would fill with clots and I would slowly suffocate to death while my lungs die piece by piece inside of my body.

I am fighting because I want for me, for your patients, and for those dying in the streets of treatable illnesses, a fucking life. A CHANCE to live. To SEE what this world has to offer without the fetters we have been placed in.

Yes. People will die. I will likely die if it comes down to fighting. Many others will die. Innocent people will die.

My life is not worth more than theirs. But the freedom of the whole is worth the risk to my life, to their lives, to all of our "lives". Because we do not have lives currently. What we have is survival. And I guarantee that any chronically ill person will tell you that there is a difference between survival and living.

Of course you don't want your innocent patients to die. Neither do we. But we cannot- CANNOT- put survival above the freedom to live.

The truth is, no one wants this to go violently. Not those who genuinely want to make things better. We would prefer peace. But peace is not changing things anymore. Peace has been making them worse.

It's time we change the power balance in this country, and remind the government who they are meant to represent. Despite their beliefs, we do not belong to them. They belong to us. Unfortunately that might mean violence.

How much violence depends on them. So, no, my life, my freedom, my needs are not above the needs of a single other human. But the needs of our country as a whole are above all. A single life cannot be held comparable to 330 some odd million. 100 lives cannot be held comparable.

I understand the horror of losing patients, I understand the trauma of losing people you /know/- people you /care/ about. But every single day someone out there is going through that loss with someone they /love/, someone they /birthed/, someone they now get to bury because a representative of the government "thought" a 12 yr old boy had a "real gun", instead of a water pistol. Someone they get to bury Because the police bust into her home in the middle of the night, and shoot her. Someone to bury because someone couldn't listen when he said he couldn't breathe.

There are homeless men and women starving, and dying of preventable, treatable illnesses on our streets. There are disabled people ROTTING in their beds because they can't afford the care that would make their lives livable.

The truth is, your patients are already dying- some before they have a chance to be your patients. You want to save them, and of course you do, it is human nature. But posts like this that would try to create guilt over what is to come are not helpful. They are not informative. And all they serve to do is put more burden on people who are already carrying those burdens with them.

Those of us who have seriously taken the time to try and figure this out, to try and come up with something, ANYTHING Else to change what is coming, what must come, are not your enemies. The corporations who tell you you can't treat someone because they can't pay are the enemies. The government who tells you you cannot remove a fetus from a woman's body to save her life are the enemies.

We do not fight you. We do not fight your patients. But we will not carry the guilt of their deaths. It will be the government that attacks infrastructure like this because they will not want hospitals and medical available to treat thos who fight them. Their deaths will be on the heads of those that already bear such guilt with pride.

I know this is anathema to you, and it would be anathema to anyone who fights on a daily basis to save lives - as it should be. But unfortunately... Sometimes saving lives comes at the cost of lives.

We need to keep thos casualties in mind, and do every single thing that we can to decrease those casualties, but we cannot let the guilt of their deaths stop the motion of change. I'm sorry, but we cannot.

I am sure this will anger you, and I am sure that it will anger others. And you and they SHOULD be angry. It should have never gotten to this point. It should have never come to a place where the government ceases to weigh the cost of human lives in their policies. It should never have come to a place where the corporations and their supply of over inflated American Currency have better handle on American Lawmakers than the American People do.

But the fact is that we are at that point.

People will die. But what is important is making sure that those deaths, that terrible cost is not paid in vain.

We said Never Again after 1945. But we are ignoring the signs now, before it is too late to stop it. What will we say in 2045 once the dust clears, If Never Again didn't mean Never Again? How will we explain to our children that we SAW the fascism coming, and CHOSE not to stop it because some people may have died?

No. I will not be the one to explain that to my children. No matter the outcome, I will fight this. I will protect the future of our world, I will do my damnedest to make sure that I leave this place a better world than when I got here.

And if that means there will be blood on my hands, that is the cost I will pay for my children to live, instead of just surviving.

I think a lot about how, if the glorious violent revolution happens, every kid with significant medical needs in a hospital where power gets cut will die.

You can decide you're willing to sacrifice your own life, but you don't get to tell everybody else on the planet that they're acceptable collateral damage.

[skrrts]

Home Is ✧ yeosang version (oneshot)

✧ gn!reader x kang yeosang ✧ genre: non-idol, slice of life, fluff, romance ✧ word count: 1,3k ✧ warnings: food / eating

You have found the love of your life, and now the two of you are ready for the next step in your relationship: moving together. Neither of you can wait to finally be able to spend every day together but it's out of the question ... the whole progress looks a lot more casual and aesthetical on social media than it actually is. Chaos. Your furniture delivery is delayed but that doesn't mean you can't have a cute dinner in the middle of unpackaged moving boxes and fake candlelight. It still feels like a dream, looking at the most beautiful man with whom you'll now truly spend your life with.

a/n: #2 of my friday oneshot series for September ft. the hyung line. delayed because i deleted the original post while on a trip. hope the start of autumn is a pleasant one for you so far 🤎🍂

It was a little silly, the way how you shoved some of the moving boxes together as a replacement for a table and threw a bedsheet over it so that it looked much nicer than simply doing it without that. You placed one of your smaller plants on top and added one of the LED candles you bought the other day. Soft sounds came from the kitchen, Yeosang unboxed a few plates to use instead of eating out of the plastic containers your takeaway food arrived in.

This was your very first apartment and everything was so new and exciting, easily outweighing the downsides of it, the stress and endless amount of work still waiting for you. Your parents owned a small house and until last week, you lived in the small rooftop apartment your dad built for you. It had been small but perfect for you and you’d always cherish the hours you spent there growing up, time with friends and most of all, those soft nights with Yeosang. 

The two of you had been dating for over two years and when Yeosang proposed to move together, you accepted it without hesitation. Your parents were thrilled and excited to see their youngest child venturing into this new part of life and there had been many helpful hands to help bring all you needed here. Now all that was left were shelves to set up and boxes to clean out, well and waiting for your bedroom and living room furniture which had been delayed by a week due to poor weather conditions in your area.

It would take weeks until this really would be homely but Yeosang and you both were simple people and you managed to feel happy with the smallest of things.

“The dinner is served.” Yeosang carried two large places swiftly inside, placing them on your small setup table. 

You allowed yourself to admire his beauty for a moment. While he wore comfortable jeans and a loose white shirt, his muscular body still was showcased beautifully, and while his brown hair reached his eyes by now, the birthmarks you adored so much were still visible.

Yeosang covered them up still when you two started to date but now, he was comfortable not to do that anymore and you were proud of him.

“What are you looking at?” he asked in his deep voice, a curious smile on his lips when you blinked, being caught once more and quickly picking up the fork and knife. 

“Just was thinking how I get to stare at you properly now at any time of the day without having to answer anyone’s question of what I am looking at,” you teased but wanted to be sincere. Your parents always taught you the importance of being sincere and honest with your partner and you liked how the two of you boosted each other’s confidence, helping out with the insecurities you faced.

You weren’t perfect but you could remind each other how you were perfect in the other’s eyes.

“Is that so? Well, I cannot deny that is a good point,” he chuckled and clapped his hands together: “Thank you for the shared meal.” 

With that, Yeosang also started to eat but he was slow, his eyes on you adoringly. You did not realize just how hungry you must have been after all the hard work of today and it tasted even better than usual, your plate empty in no time.

Your boyfriend disappeared for a moment and returned with two plates of cake and you didn’t even know when he had the time to get those. “Now you are tempting me to eat sugar at such a late hour,” you laughed and he winked.

“Well, I was just thinking how I can spoil you to any given hour now without having anyone to ask if we always do it like that.”

Tch, using your own words against you, all you could do was smile.

Yeosang picked up a little bit from the cake, offering it to you on the tip of the fork. You carefully leaned over and accepted it. His pretty face was lit by the fake candles, making him look like what you thought angels must look like.

The cake was delicious and you soon repaid the favor. This was nice, you enjoyed how soft everything felt, the excitement to know you’d share your life like this from now on.

Once you were done, you cleaned up and decided to call it enough for the day. 

Yeosang prepared the couch, there were blankets and pillows and more candles. Yet, the most beautiful part was him with arms wide open, inviting you to come into his embrace and you did so without hesitation. 

He hugged you tightly, wrapping your bodies into the blankets as he turned on the TV. You relaxed against his body and his arms kept you tight as you picked a random show you two watched before, something easy that did not require your full attention. Today really had been too exhausted to pay any show much mind.

Yeosang began to place little kisses on top of your hair and you find yourself sighing. 

“You are okay?” his voice was soft and caring, his fingers entwined with yours as he leaned a little forward so that you could look at his face.

“Mhm, I was just thinking, this is nice. I mean, I know in theory we do not do anything different from all the evenings we spent at your or my old place but knowing this is our home now…”

The budget had been a bit tight but this would be more than enough, you did not need a whole lot of space.

Yeosang’s eyes wandered over the living room or the parts you managed to set up earlier before he smiled too: “Knowing how it won’t get boring.... I am excited, thinking about mornings where you get nervous because you cannot find your keys and they just fell off the shelf or when I have no memory just where I left my phone in the middle of the night.”

It was something the two of you would do very likely. You could already see it in your mind, how two mature people just were silly and clumsy together, maybe a little lost. 

“But also, do not forget how we will be too late at work because we got lost in each other’s embrace, little kisses exchanged while one of us mumbles how we should get going but the other is simply unwilling to let go just yet.” 

Most of your friends had a hard time imagining how the two of you were like that as you were considered the mature ones but it occurred several times and now living together, well.

You loved how you were a little more silly when it just was the two of you together like that. 

“That sounds amazing,” Yeosang admitted, humming as his gaze wandered back to the TV.

“I do not care if in the end, we do decide to expand families or live just like that, the two of us. I know that now, my home in form of the person I adore the post and the place where I return to are finally together and I am so very lucky for that.”

Your cheeks turned red just a little when he said that.  “Sh, you make me all shy!” you complained and Yeosang grinned: “Good, get used to it.”

You rolled your eyes and he laughed, pressing a gentle kiss on your lips.

“I love you, so very much,” he whispered and your hand rested on his cheek.

“I love you too, Yeosang.”

Yeosang looked happy and content when he looked at you and for a moment you just remained like that before snuggling closer to him again. The TV was still running in the background but all you could think about was how you had a future, one really starting now, together with the man you loved more than anything in the world.

[clippingamazon]

7 Advantages Of Carbon Fiber Parts

Carbon fiber is gaining significant acceptance in many industries, like automotive manufacturing. Since the past few years, carbon fiber parts have become increasingly sought after by car lovers and even manufacturers. Carbon fiber comes with many advantages including improved performance and increased security. Here we'll look at seven benefits of carbon fiber components.

Performance improvement and weight reduction

One of the major benefits that comes with carbon fiber parts is their remarkable lightness. Carbon fiber is considerably more lightweight than other traditional substances like steel or aluminum. Reduced weight improves efficiency on a variety of different levels. Firstly, it enhances acceleration and allows cars to achieve higher speeds faster. It also contributes to better handling and better maneuverability. This results in an enjoyable driving experience.

Energy Efficiency and Emission Reduction

Carbon fiber auto parts are extremely light and contributes to improved fuel economy. Fuel consumption is reduced when a vehicle weighs less. The car owner not only gets a benefit from this however, the planet can also benefit by reducing carbon dioxide emissions. Carbon fiber is an important element in the search for sustainable automotive alternatives.

Security Boosted

Car components made from carbon fiber are very strong and rigid while still maintaining an ultra-lightweight appearance. The result is enhanced security features of vehicles. In the event of a collision, carbon fiber components offer a greater strength-to-weight ratio than traditional materials, thereby providing better protection for passengers. Carbon fiber absorbs, and then disperses energy. This helps lessen the force of impact during collisions.

Durability and longevity

When compared to conventional material, composites exhibits remarkable endurance and durability. Carbon fiber parts for automobiles maintain their structural integrity over longer periods of time because of its resistance to wear and tear. The longevity of carbon fiber means lower maintenance costs for car owners and enhances the overall lifespan of the vehicle. Carbon fiber also lasts due to its resistance heat and UV.

Customization and Design

Carbon fiber allows for unparalleled design flexibility and customization options when it comes to car manufacturing. The unique appearance and distinct woven design makes carbon fiber parts for cars visually attractive. Carbon fiber car parts come in a wide range of styles, including matte, glossy, or color. The ability to customize the finish gives a personalized touch, making the car stand out other vehicles.

It is impervious against corrosion.

As opposed to other metals, carbon fibre is highly resistant to corrosion. This property is especially advantageous when you live in areas that have harsh weather conditions or high humidity levels. The carbon fiber components in automobiles are not susceptible to rusting and ensure their efficiency in time, and also maintains the appearance. By using carbon fiber components that are used in cars, owners reduce the risk of corrosion-related issues and enjoy a more reliable and easy-to-maintain driving experience.

Cost-effectiveness

Although composites parts may initially seem more expensive than traditional materials however, they provide long-term value-for-money. The durability and resistance to wear makes it less necessary to replace or repair. The weight loss also leads to improved fuel efficiency, which results in a long-term savings on gasoline. In time, the advantages of carbon fiber outweigh the initial cost, making it an excellent choice for car owners.

Conclusion

Cars made from carbon fiber provide a range of advantages that have changed the way we do business. From enhanced performance and greater energy efficiency, to increased security and endurance carbon fiber provides advantages that traditional materials cannot compare to. In addition, its options to customize and resistance to corrosion contribute to a superior overall driving experience. Carbon fiber can help car makers and enthusiasts achieve new levels of performance and design.

[makeallthingsyours]

For whatever reason, my Tumblr malfunctioned and caused a question which I had been sent to be removed, so I regrettably cannot credit the person who asked it. The question regarded Vulcans as neighbours, and them living in blocks of flats.

I am very grateful for this question, and here is my take on the matter. It is, of course, just my imagination, not canon in any way.

Vulcans as neighbours.

I imagine that Vulcans tend to live in the proximity of their family and their House. The most prominent Houses may have residences or fortresses that can easily house a thousand of people comfortably, and even more with some crowding. The Houses of lower status will usually still have at least one big house the families can flock to for holidays or in times of hardship. Members of the same family would often live in one, multigenerational household (in rural, sparsely populated regions) or in neighboring houses or flats. It would be quite common for an entire block of flats to be shared by people who are all related. Since the typical living arrangement is as described, the only people on Vulcan who live apart from their families are these who moved from their hometowns for some reason, these who do not have any surviving family (which is extremely rare, since Vulcans consider even the furthest family ties to be important, and a person who lost their immediate family would be quickly 'adopted' into some other part of their House or Clan), or immigrants.

This bit of information is necessary to understand the attitude many Vulcans have towards their neighbors.

A person who spent their entire life living close to their family may get rather lonely when removed from that environment, even with their telepathic bonds. Thus, many Vulcans who move, for example to study or work, opt for at least semi-communal settings, like various dormitories, which are especially common in academic towns. This setting allows both privacy and a sense of community, both vital for a Vulcan.

When living in a block of flats with strangers, they would usually be very careful when initiating social interactions, as it is seen as impolite to infringe upon someone's privacy in any way. Still, they often wish to acquaint themselves with their neighbors and sometimes choose the strangest ways to do so. These can range from asking for help in matters that certainly don't require it to leaving a full bag of fresh vegetables on someone's doorstep.

For an immigrant that moves into a mostly Vulcan neighborhood, the most difficult thing is to not get involved into local social life. Vuclan communities are generally extremely open to anyone willing to accept how they function. Because of that, many people who come to Vulcan for a work assignment or to study stay for life.

When Vulcans move to a different planet, they ussual seek other Vulcans and form communities there, as living without that support net is generally difficult for them. Community isn't only a way of satisfying the needs for interaction with others, it is also a support net that aids self control, which is very important for them. It is less likely for someone to lose their nerves when everyone else is calm.

In the end, while Vulcan culture treats privacy as one of the most important rights of an individual, Vulcans are naturally social beings, just as Humans, or maybe more due to their telepathy. That also connects to the fact that in the light of vulcan philosophy, an individual is responsible for the good of the society. (The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one.) Thus, Vulcans certainly care for their neighbors.

If you have any other ideas, questions or suggestions, please, share them.

Live Long and Prosper

[thekingofwinterblog]

It’s all for his sake - Endeavor and the Sunk Cost Fallacy

My hero academia 301 is a pretty interesting chapter, but for me, the most notable piece of it was how Endeavour reacted to the realization that Touya couldnt surpass All Might.

upon realizing that his son might not be able to do it because of inborn physical limitations, he immediatly stopped his training, which frankly was the responsible and adult thing to do. 

This stint of real parenthood did not last long however.

After taking the matter to a doctor, he is flat out told that not only cant Touya achive what endeavor wants, but it is a direct result of his incredibly selfish and irresponsible attempt to play god, by trying to breed the “perfect” hero into being.

It is how you react when you lose however, that shows who you really are, and endeavor illustrates that very, very well.

Upon being told in no uncertain terms that his attempts at Breeding an heir failed magnificently, producing a child that was not capable of resisting his own immense power, but also admonished by his doctor for even attempting it, and adviced not to try again, Endeavor instead doubled down, while focusing on the child he screwed over from the start with his attempt at genetic manipulation.

It was all for him you see. Endeavor doesnt use those words, but that is how he spins it here. it was all for Touya, all for his sake. if i stop now, then Touya was all for nothing, a mistake, im doing this for my son.

if im doing this for my son, then im not responsible for any of this.

his wife however, calls him out on it, as she understands Touya much, much more than endeavor does. or rather, she sees him fully as a human being, instead of as a thing, a weapon, a failed attempt at an heir.

Unlike Endeavor, Rei is able to see the way this all is affecting her son. She is able to see, and understand that Touya has fully accepted what Endeavor wanted him to be. a stronger, and better version of himself. however, unlike Endeavor, she only cares about him as a person.

Endeavour by comparison isnt completely uncaring about Touya. like most abusive parents, he does possess love for his offspring, but it is forever tainted by the fact that however much he might care, or not care about Touya, any familial love he has for his son is tainted by the fact that to Endeavor, he is a failed experiment, a failed heir, not his child. 

He is the golden child that Endeavor was building up as his true and only heir, who he breed, trained, and molded to for that single purpose, and now that he’s reached a point where he cant continue that legacy.

so, its time to abandon him, and start over new, despite literarily having just learned how stupid this plan was, and that it can, in fact, go completely wrong, with a quirk that will fuck over the person he brings into the world.

Of course, Endeavor doesnt use those words to frame it. there is no way to pretend to be a hero, if you phrase it like that after all. Intead, this is the words he uses.

this is a very important series of panels for a great number of reasons, some that can be debated, argued, and we will probably never know the full truth to the questions because this is a series published in 2020′s shonen jump, and there are things that probably wasnt gonna fly with Hori’s editors, if it was the case.

but lets start with what can not be debated. Endeavor’s words here.

“If we want him to give it up, then we have no choice... Touya... Cant surpass him.”

These are very telling words, and however you believe The third and fourth children of the Todoroki family was concieved, there is not denying the meaning of what he’s saying here.

The only way that my son will stop being an idiot and fall into line, is if we have another baby. that is the only Right way to move forward. it is morally right, because if we dont do this, then he’s going to destroy himself.

there are two ways to interpret this scene.

The charitable way is to read it as the fact that he used Rei’s oldest son’s mental state as a justification of guilting his wife to have a third child, to give this attempt at a superpowered breeding project another shot, despite the fact that they now know that this can lead to a child who is essentially born crippled from his own powers, and despite the fact that Rei obviously understands the effect of them continuing this insanity will have on their oldest son.

the uncharitable way to look at it, is that he used this as justification for flat out raping her, and forcing a third, and then later a fourth child on her.

I personally believe the last one, given a number of factors shown in this chapter(the way this page is framed, the fact Rei obviously didnt want a third child, given she predicted exactly how touya would react, the way her eyes would latet turn when she looks at who is presumably touya which really brings to mind how she would later react to her youngest son’s face after her mental breakdown, etc.), but i’ll frankly admitt that withouth a direct quote from Hori, its impossible to know for sure one way or another. 

either way however, this is a very good example of Endeavor both being influenced by, and using Sunk Cost Fallacy to justify bringing another potentially crippled child into the world for his own, selfish goals.

sunk cost Fallacy, is a mental reaction to when you invest more time and resources into a project, that you becomes so emotionally invested into said project that you will continue to invest into it, even if it reaches a point that it becomes clear that the resources you put into it, far, far outweighs the potential gains you can achieve.

because if you give up after having invested years, and years of effort to breed, raise, and train a kid, and then all that effort was absolutely wasted. hence he choose to keep going, despite having learned what a terrible idea this is.

He doesnt care about the fact that his next child might be even more crippled than his firstborn, he doesnt care about his son’s actual wellbeing. he cares about the fact that if he doesnt continue this insanity, then not only will he not achieve his dreams, but everything he did to get to this point was for absolutely nothing.

and endeavor cannot accept that. and so long as he can justify breeding more children into the world, and there being any chance they might inherit both quirks perfectly, he doesnt care about anything else.

and the moment he realised that this kid wasnt gonna cut it either, he did it again. it is not a coincidence, that the age gap between Endeavor’s second, third, and fourth children were all 3-4 years apart. because thats the age where you can usually tell when a quirk will manifest or not, as established earlier in the series.

While she isnt brought up directly by Endeavor as a justification, it is very telling that Endeavor decided on having a third child, only after his second child was old enough that he could tell that that there was no chance she could take the place as his heir instead.

So, he had his third child, and as time passed and it became obvious that he wasn’t gonna be able to fulfill Endeavor’s goals either, he dumped him, and instead breed a fourth child into existence.

and finally, he struck gold. he did it. he produced Shoto.

everything was finally worth it, and now, everything would be absolutely fine. the cost fallacy had reached its end, and it was now all full sails ahead.

except of course it wasnt.

His oldest son, now in middle school, had been raised from birth to believe he would surpass his father, only to be thrown away, and getting to see his father try to replace him, not once, but twice.

frankly, this scene is probably my favorite in the chapter, because it goes to show Endeavor’s mindset. Natsuo made a point that their father completely ignored his older children. and he did... from Natsuo’s perspective. however, having a more thourough picture of things, we can clearly see that this wasnt the case with Touya.

Endeavor genuinly cared for Touya, enough that once he got that child he tried to breed into existence 4 times, he genuinly wanted him to just abandon trying to be a hero. he genuinly thinks of himself as a good dad here, wanting his son to abandon the mission he set out for him before he was born. of course, with context, this heartwarming scene is incredibly sad and insidious, because we understand why Endeavor got so attached to his oldest child. because he WAS the golden child. he was the child Endeavor genuinly cared about, and invested in, and trained personally with great warmth and enthusiasm.

And not only did he abandon him as a failed project the moment he realized he wasnt gonna live up to his ridiculous standards, but he literarily created 2 more kids to try and replace him, just as his oldest son was old enough to understand what exactly his dad was doing. over the course of this chapter, we get to see Touya’s start as a 5-8 year old, his deteriorating mental state over the years, until he finally seemed to reach the breaking point with Shoto’s birth sometime in his middle school years 12-15. 

Endeavor is in this scene, just not capable of understanding why Touya so desperately wants to become a hero, when obviously he isnt physically able to do so. he isnt able to understand that he is 100% to blame for the fact that his son is having a full emotional breakdown after literaly being replaced by his siblings. 

In other words, Endeavor genuinly think’s he’s a good person. a person who has made a few mistakes along the way sure, but a person who was always justified in the end, and now that he’s having to face the fact that as dabi would later say “The past never dies” and has to face the aftermath of his inane attempt to play god for the pettiest of reasons, things simply arent going to work out.

He isnt going to have a happy family, who can now put the awful early years behind them, he put way too much effort, caused too much suffering and sacrificed too many years of his life for this not to work out as he wants.

after all, if he walks away from this project now, and lets Shoto have a normal childhood, and decide for himself, with no pressure from him, wheter or not to become a hero, then the sunk cost fallacy will have reached a negative end. it will all have been for nothing.

and we know he did eventually double down on this mentality, literarily beating into Shoto that he WAS going to become a hero, and there was not but’s or no’s about it.

there was no way that Endeavor was EVER going to let things be for nothing. His treatment of his older children could not be for nothing. His treatment of his wife could not be for nothing. His treatment of Shoto, and the way he beat him black and blue to train him, could not be for nothing.

Because if it all was for nothing, if everything he feels guilty about was for absolutely nothing, then he was in fact, a bad, bad person, who had no justification for anything he ever did.

[kaijusplotch]

Ok there is something that really annoys me about people and the bad batch

Rant ahead you have been warned

[[more]]

Hunter is the SARGEANT of the Bad Batch. He IS THE ONE IN COMMAND.

People don't seem to understand what military hierarchy means, even in Star Wars.

So let's take a look here at the "ranks" of clones and the batch.

Cody: MARSHAL COMMANDER of the GAR and Third Systems array. COMMANDER of the 212 Battalion. Answers only to Palpatine (realistically) and Generals.

Wolffe: Commander of the 104th. Answers to Palpatine, Generals, OR the Marshal Commander (Cody).

Rex: Captain (later promoted to Commander) of the 501st. Answers to Palpatine, Marshal Commander Cody, Generals, Commanders (including Ahsoka).

Greggor: Commando Captain. Answers to Palpatine, Marshal Commander Cody, Generals, Commanders.

Hunter: Sargeant. Highest rank of the bad batch. Answers to Palpatine, Generals, Marshal Commander Cody, Commanders, and Captains.

Echo: ARC trooper. Now there are a LOT of ranks between Echo and Hunter. But there is some independence with ARC troopers. They are, as their name suggests, Advanced Recon Commandos. Echo answers to everyone above him, but he has some leeway in "respect"? He leads small squads of regular troopers or works with other ARCs in specialized units and missions.

Finally we have the rest of the batch:

Wrecker, Tech, Crosshair: all Troopers. Unranked officially, they are specialized but they are, to put it bluntly; Cannon fodder in the scheme of things. They are the "enlisted men".

Now why is this important for people to understand?

It comes from the many MANY posts I see complaining that Hunter is self centered and refuses to "rescue" his brother, and puts the batch over "regs". Saying he doesn't care about the others or about Crosshair.

These people are disregarding the fact that Hunter is THE HIGHEST RANKING CLONE IN THE BAD BATCH.

YES. The bad batch is family. But that is SECOND to them being a Squad in many aspects.

Hunter has his entire squad AND OMEGA'S lives in his hands every single time he takes a mission from Cid.

Being in command of a squad means you have to either prioritize the mission or your men. Hunter is far more compassionate than people make him out to be. He does not like putting his men, his brothers, into situations that would risk their lives.

Yes, he has "left Crosshair behind". But let's take a look at EVERY SINGLE ENCOUNTER THEY HAVE HAD WITH CROSSHAIR SINCE HE WAS TAKEN OUT OF THE BRIG IN AFTERMATH!!!

Crosshair has had MULTIPLE fully trained clone troopers, often double digits or MORE, align with the three/four? (rip man who got shot you were a good one for an empire brown noser) highly trained Nat born soldiers with him Every. Single. Time.

Crosshair is deadly on his own, but he has been fighting the chip. Look at how many shots he has MISSED! Or even took WARNING shots like on Bracca on Tech!! He could have sniped him through his open helmet gap and his goggles! But Crosshair DIDN'T. SO to people saying Crosshair is EVIL, no. He is fighting. But he is not the focus of this rant.

Hunter KNOWS the limits of his squad. And he knows without their lookout/sniper/eyes in the sky Crosshair, they are fucked. Add in the non-combatant Omega, A CHILD, and Hunter has to protect those under his command.

He knows that his squad cannot take on Crosshair and any troopers he is allowed to have without loosing lives.

The lives of the many outweigh the lives of the few l.

Hunter knows where Crosshair is. He knows that as of right now; Crosshair is an asset to the empire and Hunter doesn't think Rampart will decommission him.

Now what about Hunter not listening to Echo?

Echo has barely any rank. His advice and comments are advisory at the very most. But listen, Hunter DOES take Echo's thoughts into consideration. Echo has had FAR more training than Tech or Wrecker, he has seen things the Batch hasn't.

Echo technically is out of line, but Hunter NEVER pulls his rank on Echo. He listens he stores those comments away to think them over.

And in today's episode? He realizes that yes! Echo is right. Hunter realized yes, this is similar to Sako Minor. He took a risk and listened to his ARC trooper.

And they almost made it. But let's look at the order in which the group got into the Marauder.

Wrecker plays main cover for Echo and Gregor to get in. Gregor is injured and Echo does not has as much fire power and foghorn capability as he has one arm.

Next up? Tech. He is less armored, and although highly capable, with the fighters coming back, they needed Tech to pilot and hold the Marauder steady.

Hunter is LAST. He puts his MEN his BROTHERS ahead of his own safety.

And when he fails to get in? When he falls off the side OF A FUCKING MOUNTAIN while the Havoc Marauder is in a dogfight with what are basically Proto-Tie fighters?

He ORDERS them to LEAVE HIM BEHIND.

Hunter knows the lives of the many outweigh the lives of the few. Even his own. Greggor is injured and needs help. The Havoc has taken damage and will not survive a long dogfight.

Hunter makes the call to put his men, AGAIN, above the mission. To his own detriment. To him being captured.

And I don't think he is expecting a rescue. Because he expects his brothers to put the lives of themselves and Omega over his life.

[caedescorvirpg]

PEREGRINE FALCON. ESTHER SUN-HI PARK   —   29,  W.

Perfect Shot: For a set amount of time, you hit with 100% accuracy (+) applies to any weapon or movement of your own (-) bound by the laws of physics and matter, a bullet cannot go through steel doors, just as it cannot hit someone across the country (-) power does not apply to avoiding damage.

HISTORY

cw: violence, implied death

THEY ARE WATCHING WITH TENDER HUNGER; a thousand gleaming smiles peering from below, wounding like wire from the perch. They want you to stumble, to trip, to fall without having to ask for it. They want you to bleed and they want you to want it. Standing atop a silver pierced edge you feel the world shift around you — movement as memorized pain learned only by failure. What comes after the performance is of no consequence, what matters is the face you recognize not as your own but as some history of another. Your mother’s hatred is a mirror, a distorted fate with someone else’s future. (Here: a knife held to her your throat; a hand reaching out too late;  sharp objects tearing through soft flesh; a corpse made before you can move). You do not understand her death as the consequence of duty, the sacrifice a person must make to atone for some fault in humanity, but one day you will and that might be enough. Until then, obsession becomes you.

They’re shooting the scene where you die now. A woman and her love, slowly falling, slowly floating to their deaths amidst the clouds and the birds and the gravel. Her face is obscured by passing skyscrapers and when the moment ends your body does not find ground to land on. You have chosen this life as a stunt performer but it does not negate the hurt that comes with it. The world moves on but you are suspended in time, doomed to watch every girl’s death like your own. It is a strange, docile thing of an eternity, and it echos what you have always known: the needs of the many outweigh the lives of a few. Beyond your beginning, the fractured mirror is traded for violent rows of violet stars scattered across your face. Your body is battered nightly, but there’s an art to violence and this is a choice you have made as an act of freedom. One day you will die for someone else’s dream, but tonight you have chosen this path on your own. No one else could have done it for you.

CONNECTIONS

SNOW OWL ﹒  THE SHAPE OF YOUR TEETH IS WRITTEN INTO MY PALM

It’s something like starlight: beautiful, bright, illuminating. Her hands flatten against the side of your face directing your gaze to the spot above her head, and it’s more painful worse than all the harm you’ve endured so far. But while she has her hands on your face, you have her heart in your mouth. You could swallow her whole, betray yourself with the thought of her dissolution, but you have plans for your former lover and to ruin it now would be a waste. So for now you act ignorant, tantalize her with the thought of your failure, and allow yourself to be swept in the same story you two have played time and time again. You will win this war of hearts and she will pay the price for it.

BLUE JAY ﹒  THEN LET IT BE

cw: violence

You’re dying and he leaves you for dead. The blood drapes around you like a curtain at the end of play. Your dying and his eyes locks with yours. The bullet is lodged in your side, forcing you to the floor. You’re dying and he rips his hand away before exiting stage left — the objective is far too important. You survive and although you cannot remember why, you do not forget to weight of his betrayal.  From now on, BLUE JAY can fend for himself in the same way he once thought you expendable. Time has broken the rib of your forgiveness and so when you kill him, you will make sure he knows how easy you could have saved him.

SWAN ﹒  I DO NOT SAY THIS IN ORDER TO WOUND

In another lifetime, you might have liked her, loved her even, but in this one the farthest you can fathom is indifference. Her gaze is not an innocent thing. You know what she wants and in this denial she has made a home for herself, expecting you to long for her in the same way all people seem to do. But you’re tired and you cannot believe in anything else than the one who created you. But even unsettling things can be still be made useful, and so she will play her part in the plan you have crafted so carefully.  You cannot dare to dream of being with another when already your heart has yet to be filled by something even more cruel. Still, you wonder what part of her she would have you take first: her hands or her mouth.

This skeleton is TAKEN by JO and is portrayed by SORA CHOI. Their highest stat is STRENGTH and their specialty is PICKPOCKETING.

[itsclydebitches]

Vine’s death/sacrifice really kinda messes with the “themes” of this volume, the idea of not sacrificing anyone to save others. I guess self-sacrifice is considered ok because of Hazel and Penny, but I just think about their conversation with JRY, with their talk of doing everything possible to save a beloved teammate.

Yeah, self-sacrifices are a whole different ballgame in RWBY. It’s framed as heroic to do everything possible to save an individual, or for an individual to sacrifice themselves for everyone else. However, it’s not framed as heroic for others to sacrifice an individual to save the whole. So the idea of saving Oscar at any cost is presented as the unambiguously good thing to do... with the show largely ignoring the reverse question of, “So it’s okay to sacrifice hundreds or thousands of people--and the safety of an entire city housing the majority of the city below--for one?” 

There are admittedly differences in terms of the presumed fatality of each situation. Meaning, Hazel, Vine, and Penny are framed as having to die or lots more people will definitely die: Salem will get JRYOE, the Ace Ops + Qrow will perish, Cinder will get the power and do horrific things with it (even if this supposed inevitability isn’t executed well. Example: there apparently just isn’t time to heal Penny). In contrast, Oscar is presented as a case where they can still save him and keep others alive. Obviously it all turned out the best it could--because these are the heroes and the plot ensures things go well--but the show doesn’t grapple with that risk, despite RWBY naming an episode after it. We don’t engage with the fact that JYR were 100% willing to let an entire city perish to save their teammate. It’s a heartwarming characterization from one perspective, absolutely, but the flipside is that they’re licensed huntsmen in a position of authority and their willingness to abandon the vast majority of a nation for one guy is... arguably horrifying. These issue is only exacerbated by this decision not being a one-off thing. Ruby’s desire for a perfect solution led her to trapping most of the Atlas/Mantle citizens there and then prioritizing two other teammates--Nora and Penny--over helping the people, despite her inability to do anything to assist those teammates. She isn’t defending them from anything (prior to the Hound’s arrival), doesn’t have the skills to heal them, they’re not even conscious to ask her to stay with them... she just decided that sitting at her friends’ bedside, doing nothing, was more important than helping the people who were currently in life threatening danger. Oscar was in life threatening danger too, but JYR were still in the same position of being official protectors of the people who said, “No. Our friend is more important than the whole nation. We’ll let it burn for the chance to save him.” 

Since I just started Voyager (side note: I WOULD DIE FOR JANEWAY) I’m reminded of how often Star Trek as a franchise emphasizes these moral questions. Not just in the classic “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few,” but also when it comes to any position of authority. Captains and Commanders have to grapple with whether they’re able to send an individual--likely a friend--into a deadly situation to help the rest of the ship, like ordering your Chief Engineer into dangerous territory to fix something. They also have to grapple with whether they’re able to leave people behind for the sake of the ship and how much danger it’s ethical to put the whole crew in to continue trying to save the few (something that takes center stage in numerous episodes). Star Trek, though far from perfect as a franchise, largely achieves a great balance between having characters be hopeful, pushing the odds, upholding the importance of every life... but also recognizing that, as the authority here, they cannot put the life of one individual over the entirety of the ship (not unless the entire ship agrees to take that risk. Hence, The Search for Spock). They cannot prioritize their personal desires and needs over that of their crew... but that’s precisely where the RWBY group has ended up. Frankly, this wouldn’t be as much of a problem if the show had just made them into rogue entities, rather than licensed huntsmen who are very much using their authority to gain power over the people they’re not prioritizing (Ruby starts her video by telling the world she’s a huntress, Jaune uses his credentials to get people to follow him). It’s the authority that’s the problem. If a civilian that happens to have a talent for fighting decides to defend their friends instead of helping the people, fine. We may not personally agree with that decision, but it’s theirs to make. The problem is our heroes are huntsmen. They have a duty and they are continually ignoring that duty despite reaping the benefits of their position. Someone with the authority of a huntsmen can sacrifice themselves to save the people, or to save a friend. They cannot, however, willingly sacrifice the people for themselves, or a friend. And yes “sacrifice” includes not just active harm (keeping Atlas trapped), but also increasing the risk of harm (not wanting the whale to be bombed) and passiveness (sitting in a mansion) when it’s their responsibility to protect others. 

What was it Weiss said at Mountain Glenn? 

“It's a job. We all had this romanticized vision of being a Huntress in our heads! But at the end of the day, it's a job to protect the people and whatever we want, will have to come second.”

The characters have completely forgotten that... and the writers have too. Now, “whatever we want” is framed as the heroic thing to do. Ruby wants a miracle despite all evidence to the contrary, so all the people they’ve successful evacuated have to remain in danger until she gets one. The JRY group want their teammate back, so the army will just have to keep dying until they get him. (The fact that they eventually agree to the bomb going off whether they’re still in there or not--something I quite like--doesn’t erase that they initially wanted the Ace Ops to not drop the bomb at all.) Ruby doesn’t want to have to choose between Mantle and Atlas, so both cities just have to lose out on three of the very few people who exist to protect them while they’re torn apart by monsters. “Both houses deserve to be saved!” says the firefighter, standing there and refusing to help either. Inevitably, both burn down. 

The willingness to leave behind an individual for the whole--something which, I should point out, exists in the “Are you willing to leave the few in Mantle for all of Atlas + a large number of refugees?” question-- isn’t just the sacrifice of the individual, it’s also a sacrifice of the authority. Are you willing to live with the guilt of this decision? Are you willing to sit with that choice and accept any consequences that might come your way, including others’ hatred of you for failing to achieve perfection? Ironwood was. He knew he was hurting Mantle, knew no one had been able to come up with a perfect solution, and decided that helping the whole world was worth it. Others despising him was worth getting communications back up and (he thought) defeating Salem. That’s a sacrifice, one that makes Winter’s “You sacrificed nothing!” line sound particularly ridiculous. What has the group sacrificed lately? I don’t mean what they’ve lost--what’s been taken from them--but what they’ve willingly given up to help others. I can’t think of much, especially not in Volume 8. Ruby never even made the choice at all, let alone accepted the drawbacks of it. 

RWBY wants to be a complex, morally gray show, but you cannot write that and have heroes who insist on that fairy tale ending. Something has to give and, inevitably, RWBY keeps supplying that ending instead of forcing the characters to grow. If they want a dark, imperfect world then they need protagonists like Ironwood. No, not crazy, murderous, keep-him-away-from-me Ironwood, but the Ironwood of early Volume 7 who was willing to acknowledge that sometimes perfection is impossible. Sometimes it’s your duty to just get the best outcome possible, not the best you’d hoped for. Sometimes you have to make incredibly hard decisions and shoulder the weight of that because you accepted this responsibility when you took on the role of leader. The group hasn’t accepted a thing and Ruby absolutely didn’t accept the responsibility of seizing power and presenting herself as the world’s leader. Instead, they’ve reverted to their characterizations at the beginning of Mountain Glenn. What do you mean I can’t make the world perfect by wishing it was so? Fine, if I can’t have perfection than I won’t accept anything at all. 

[yeeyee-alumni]

Ellie’s (lack of a) character arc & why the result is an unsatisfying story

Let’s state the obvious: Ellie does not have a character arc in The Last of Us Part 2. A character arc is defined as a gradual transformation or inner journey of a character in response to changing developments in the story. And you may argue that Ellie from the beginning of the game is not the same as the one at the end of the game, and I would agree with you. She went from a woman consumed by revenge (not really but we will stick with that for now) to a woman able to forgive her aggressor and move on. However, there are problems with this supposed inner change on multiple levels. a) the change is not gradual b) the change comes out of nowhere c) the change is not informed by anything I don’t think there’s any need to thoroughly explain the first statement. Ellie has the same goal from the beginning to the very last second before attaining her goal. At no point in the story is she self-reflective, questions her methods, there’s no moral dilemma for her, no inner conflict, no doubt that causes her to put her own actions into a new perspective and possibly change her motivation. From beginning to end she believes to be 100% justified in her goal to kill Abby. Subsequently, if Ellie were actually consumed by revenge, the only logical conclusion to her story would be for her to eventually drown Abby.

Which neatly leads me to the next point: her change comes out of nowhere. The decision to let Abby go, as is implied by the narrative, is triggered by a random, arbitrary flashback of Joel. First of all, the timing here is outright comical. For what reason is she having this specific flashback at this very moment? Sounds like contrived, convenient bs to me to give the appearance that her decision is informed by something (which it isn’t, and we'll get to that in a moment). Second of all, getting a flashback to the most important person in your life that has been brutally murdered in front of you, seeing an image of what could have been and what was unjustly taken from you, is not gonna inspire you to forgive your aggressor. If anything, it would make you more determined and sadistic. And third of all, I hear you all yelling "but it was a flashback to their conversation about forgiveness and that inspired her to forgive Abby." And I have multiple qualms regarding this line of thinking. Number one, forgiving the person you love most in this world for having lied to you cannot be compared to forgiving the person who brutally took said person from you. This actually further accentuates my previous point, this is the person that robbed you of your opportunity for reconciliation. Implying that Ellie's thought process here is „I wanted to forgive Joel, but this person robbed me of any opportunity to, so I have to forgive her” is muddled, nonsensical and quite frankly unrealistic. And number two, is the implication here that this is the first time Ellie has thought back to that conversation? That’s a whole new level of nonsense. She will have reflected on all moments with Joel, including this one, and yet at no point prior to this moment had she considered even the possibility of forgiveness, as I have illustrated earlier. So why now? Very obviously to get a payoff, which was neither set up nor properly developed. And moving on to my last point: it is not informed by anything. I know a lot of players didn’t want Ellie to kill Abby, and even I felt that way at first, albeit presumably for entirely different reasons (I was so drained and removed from the narrative by that point that I only thought to myself "just go home, you psychos"). But upon reflection, I concluded that that would have been an unsatisfying conclusion narratively speaking. Nevertheless, Abby seems to have grown dear to many players. After all, they have spent several hours with her, they have seen her struggle, overcome her obstacles, fight for what she believes to be right. Their feelings towards Abby are informed by the person they have seen her to be and by the experiences they went through with her. Yet Ellie is missing all of that context. She has not been with us throughout our three days in Seattle, she doesn’t know Abby outside of her having horrifically killed Joel and she has not gained any new information that would lead her to change her opinion about her. And so, we have another example of the story making characters do things that are not informed by anything, for the sake of a poor payoff. And since we're talking about characters acting nonsensically, let's talk about the roughly three minutes leading up to Ellie nearly drowning Abby, shall we? Ellie approaches the beach absolutely determined to find and kill Abby (repeatedly murmuring Abby’s name to herself). Yet when she reaches the pillars, she cuts Abby down, letting her free Lev and follows them to the boats, indicating that Ellie has changed her mind, showing pity/empathy upon seeing Abby a mere shadow of her former self. And yet again, we have Ellie acting in a way she never has before. She didn’t have pity for Nora who was coughing her lungs out, or for Jordan who had advocated for letting her live, or for any other innocent WLF or Seraphite that came in between her and killing Abby. But the one person she holds a grudge against to the point of killing hundreds of innocent people without batting an eye, that is the person she is suddenly capable of feeling pity/empathy for? Is it really that surprising that Ellie's actions here feel forced, uncharacteristic, and illogical? But it actually gets worse. In an additional display of Druckmann not knowing how humans work, we have Ellie putting her backpack with all her gear in the boat, looking at her bloody hand and then remembering "Oh yeah, that's the woman who killed Joel. I almost forgot.” And at this point in my playthrough I was laughing out loud. And so, we have Ellie all of sudden determined to kill Abby again, so much so that she is willing to threaten an innocent child’s life (this by the way was the final nail in the coffin for me, they thoroughly obliterated Ellie’s character throughout the entire game, but this goes against the very core of her being). And we know the rest, they fight, Ellie nearly kills Abby but eventually lets her go. To summarize what happened in the three minutes before our big emotional payoff to our 25 hour-long journey of playing this epitome of misery porn: Ellie has 3 - count them 3!!! - changes of heart. Her motivation does a perfect 180 almost every minute. This is not how people work! That’s lazy, contrived beyond believe, and borderline comical levels of writing, because Druckmann prioritized having a final boss battle on a beach over organic, coherent, and logical storytelling (but I guess it was worth it for the goddamn visuals). However, what’s most infuriating is that there are such easy fixes if one only thinks about it for more than two minutes that could erase nearly all for the major issues I just illustrated while maintaining the plot points of the two fighting on a beach and Ellie letting Abby go. If we have Ellie walk to the beach immediately, finding Abby there untying the boat (Lev nearly passed out in the boat, Ellie not seeing him) and she then attacks Abby, immediately we have erased two of Ellie’s changes of heart, she remains consistent in her goals/motivation, not jumping back and forth between two extremes. The two women fight much like we see it in the game, and then as Ellie is about to finish it, we hear Lev calling out to Abby. And there we have our motivation for Ellie to not kill her. Not because she gets a random, convenient flashback, not because she forgives Abby (Abby has done nothing to earn Ellie’s forgiveness), not because Abby has earned her redemption, but because Ellie cannot find it in her to put an innocent child through the pain Abby has put her through. Because at the end of the day, Ellie’s hatred for Abby does not outweigh her capacity for compassion and empathy for those deserving of it (a core characteristic of hers that was established in the first game). Because Ellie would rather let an individual live that is undeserving of it than cause the same pain she was put through to an innocent child that is undeserving of it. Granted, if we were to go with this ending, we would still have to build towards it properly and therefore would have to tweak the rest of the game, mainly by showing Ellie being self-reflective, merciful towards innocents, and even doubtful about her goals at times to make her final decision informed by prior developments in order to have the character arc actually be a gradual transformation leading to a logical conclusion. I have been a writer for nearly 4 years now, which means I am in no way an expert, or the most creatively talented person around and yet I would argue that this ending would be much more satisfying to most players than the alternative we were presented with. Because as it stands, none of our actions or decisions (and yes that is something important to consider when we are working within the medium of video games), or Ellie’s for that matter, lead up to this conclusion. The conclusion to this story, the final moment, the big emotional payoff hinges on a random flashback, not on any other developments that previously occurred in the story. Subsequently rendering all of the 25 hours entirely pointless, none of it had an influence on the finale, none of it mattered narratively speaking. So, is it even a surprise that many found this to be dissatisfying? I noticed a few people who are fond of Abby accusing people feeling differently of having too much of an emotional bias or even going as far as to say they are less emotionally intelligent. This is problematic for two reasons, a) different people have different reasons for disliking Ellie’s final choice. Some still hate Abby as much as in the beginning, others feel drained and indifferent, and others still feel similarly to how I feel in that it’s mainly narratively dissatisfying. And b) the same story can have a different effect on any amount of people (otherwise, we would have settled the discussion about what the greatest movie all of time is long ago). My point being, that no matter how you feel about this particular story you are 100% justified in feeling this way, and yes that includes people that by the end of the game still hate Abby just as much as they did the moment she bashed Joel’s skull in. That does not necessarily have to be personal bias, more often than not it’s the ability to see through the storytelling techniques used, rendering them mostly ineffective for these people (and I include myself in this). I wanted Ellie to kill Abby not because I was unable to empathize with her or couldn’t see past my own personal bias, but because that would have been the logical, narratively satisfying conclusion to this specific story.

[floaroanemoia]

amazonite: what kind of situations call for my muse to be dishonest

tsavorite: if my muse believes in destiny or fate

lapis lazuli: where 'home' is to my muse !!

Gemstone headcanons ​@volot

amazonite: what kind of situations call for my muse to be dishonest

   Sarana tries her hardest to live as honest a life as possible, if only because she has been raised in an environment where a lie malicious enough, or even a slight deviation from the truth, could result in the death of entire families. Telling the truth, even if painful or undesirable, had been an idea instilled into the medium as what has kept both her and her people alive for so long. The Floaro Area is not ideal for life, and it is far easier to die there than survive. Thus, what was adopted over time was the belief that being maliciously dishonest—and the consequences stemming from that—are held against the perpetrator by the fates. So, for Sarana to ever be truly dishonest one or more of a few things would have to occur:    1) She would have to be far from the Floaro Area or Eterna Forest    2) It would have to be a situation where the lie causes absolutely no harm, or a white lie, such as telling a child their drawing looks amazing    3) It is dire information she needs that Sarana cannot get any other way

    White lies are easier to pry from her—especially around children or young pokmon. These are done with warm smiles and caring gazes, said to not crush the spirits of whatever is being said or shown to her. She could never sit there, in good conscience, and tell them that their nonsensical scribble or potato-esque portrait looks horrible, or nothing like what they claim it to be. No—in those cases, the medium will always take a path of slight dishonesty, gasping and gushing about how wonderful it is—how much of an artist they are; how much talent and promise they have.

   Or, in direr cases, if children have lost their parents or family member in a tragic accident—as is a somewhat common occurrence in Hisui—, she cannot bear to tell children who have no concept of death the truth, and will instead veil it with something sowing the seeds of what happened, but in a much more comforting light. She will never tell them that they are alive or coming back, for that is equally as cruel, but instead opts for a path that is a mix between reality and a beautiful lie.

   In the third case, this would really only arise if the information was pertaining to her search for Shaymin, and deemed important enough to the woman, or if someone was holding back information from her regarding Sarana’s loved ones—the location of her parents, pokemon, friends, and in the future, children or significant other. While trying to stick to honesty as much as possible, if there is no other way, Sarana will resort to being incredibly dishonest, and it can be extremely difficult to discern the truth from falsities. This is the woman who communes with the dead on a daily basis, and has stashed away in her mind so many secrets and disturbing sentences ushered her way—although lying is extremely rare for her, she is quite masterful at it. If someone has seen Shaymin and is refusing to tell her, or holds in their hands gracideas and refuses to divulge their origin, Sarana can and will concoct any lies that she believes will give her upper hand, or manipulate them into telling the truth. After all, in that case, the wellbeing of her people and pokemon there far outweighs the feelings of one person, in her mind.

tsavorite: if my muse believes in destiny or fate

   Yes. Sarana most certainly believes in destiny and fate. It is an extremely common belief among her home, and although they believe firmly in the existence of both, neither are perceived as things entirely set in stone. In their, and Sarana’s, view, what cannot be changed is the final destination of an individual’s life, dreams, aspirations or goals—only the journey on the way there. And it is only through divine intervention that the way it ends can be changed, since every living being exists to fulfil a specific purpose. Be it something grand, or something mundane—in her eyes, everyone exists for a reason pre-determined by the fates, to fill a gap in the world that exists prior to a person’s birth. Life and death are tightly controlled, and so must everything in-between be. Freedom of the journey there, and the ability to appeal for change from other deities, comes only as a safety net—a way to prevent certain deities from manipulating the fates or becoming entirely unstoppable.

   Adding onto this, Sarana, and her home, also carry the belief that those blessed with specific abilities are bound to the whims of destiny and fate even more so than usual. They have been given a gift by the pantheon, and such things come with a specific reason, no matter how clear or vague it might. To not fulfil it, or reject the idea, is an insult to the gods themselves. It is for this reason why Sarana will put her own wellbeing on the line to create keystones for binding spirits, or allows spirits to speak with her at all times of the day. Her, and her ancestors dating back thousands of years, have believed their fate is to collect the knowledge of the deceased, and bring it to the present, be it to add to the wealth of information held by humanity, or to prevent history from repeating itself.

lapis lazuli: where 'home' is to my muse

   Despite her nomadic lifestyle, home will always be the Floaro Area and Eterna Forest to the medium. It was where she was born and raised in; where she learnt to read, write, walk, talk, sing, and everything else. It is where her community lives, and where her ancestors thrived. Every fibre of her being is dedicated to the place and its revival. And no other place in Hisui can evoke such a strong feeling of connection to the land as those places, although she does feel inexorably bound to Hisui in general, and a little more so in places connected to her blood. To be away from her home for too long, even if she remains in the same region, brings about a sense of being lost; being spiritually drained and as though she is missing part of herself.

   If she had to pick a close second, however, it would be the Flower Paradise. Although Sarana has only visited it and the Seabreak Path a few times in her life—when rituals called for it—, it is perhaps the only other place that evokes such a sense of belonging and being home in the medium. Another place where her soul can rest, if only for a little while.

[acti-veg]

Why Vegan - Animal Rights

While there are various facets to veganism, a belief in the rights of animals is central to the philosophy behind it. As vegans, we believe that animals should have some fundamental rights granted to them by merit of their being sentient. There is a great deal of discussion in the community on what precisely those rights should be, but there are at least a few that the majority of vegans can agree on.

First and foremost, animals have a right to life. This is as simple as it sounds; animals have the right to live, regardless of how ‘useful’ or profitable those lives are to anyone else, just as you and I do. This sounds obvious, and even many non-vegans will agree with it in principle, but in practice it is this fundamental right that is violated when we choose to eat, wear and experiment on animals. No matter how ‘kindly’ an animal is treated before they are sent to slaughter, no matter how large their cage or field, the mere act of taking away their life to serve humans ends is unethical, on the grounds that an animal’s right to their own life is being disregarded in service to human interests.

Animals also have the right to self-determination, insofar as we can give it to them. This means that ideally, animals should be allowed to determine the course of their own lives and to pursue their own interests. They shouldn’t be kept in cages for our amusement, or have their will bent towards our own purposes. It is often argued in industries like wool or egg production that these products ‘don’t kill animals.’ While this isn’t even technically true (as we shall discuss later), even if it were, exploiting animals for profit would still be in violation of their right to self-determination. 

In this same vein, animals have the right to bodily autonomy. This means that the body of an animal is owned by the animal, to do with as they will, not to be subject to exploitation, profiteering or manipulation. This means that even if an animal is not physically hurt as a result of their exploitation, it would still be unacceptable to take what they produce and use it to benefit us, rather than allowing animals to benefit from their own production. An example of this would be taking honey from a beehive, rather than allowing them to make use of the result of their own labour.

Finally, there are some, such as the prominent philosopher and legal scholar Gary Francione, who contend that the only right animals really require is the right not to be regarded as property. It is, he argues, the property status of animals that is at the core of their mistreatment; it is this which allows us to exploit and abuse them on such a staggering scale and still have it be perfectly legal. If animals were not considered property, they would be granted some of the same legal protections from abuse which are granted to humans. As long as animals are considered property, they will be subject to human exploitation.

It is worth noting that you do not have to believe that humans and animals are equal to be vegan, and certainly not that animals should have the exact same rights that humans do. Vegans simply acknowledge the fact that animals are worthy of moral consideration, and so should have some fundamental rights. Animals will never need the right to vote, but they clearly do have preferences - preferring to live, to not to be in pain, to have access to comfortable shelter and adequate food. The decision to refuse to take these preferences into consideration when making moral decisions which will clearly affect animals simply cannot be justified.

Using animals for our own benefit ignores these rights and treats the lesser interests of humans as more important than the greater interests of animals. This is known as speciesism; an attitude of bias in favour of your own species over any other in cases where your interests and theirs come into conflict.

 There are times when the interests of your own group will be favoured over the interests of any other group, and in cases where your needs outweigh theirs that may be justified. In the case of eating animals though, our desire to eat their flesh is being weighed against the animal’s right to live, it seems obvious that we would be acting selfishly if we favoured our own lesser desires over their greater needs. Yet, this is exactly what we do to millions of animals every single day.

-An extract from my free eBook: The Green Road - A Practical Guide to Veganism

[robertreich]

Public Health First

Dick Kovacevich, former CEO of Wells Fargo bank, thinks most Americans should return to work in April, urging that we “gradually bring those people back and see what happens”.

Lloyd Blankfein, former CEO of Goldman Sachs, whose net worth is $1.1bn, recommends “those with a lower risk of the diseases return to work” within a “very few weeks”.

Tom Galisano, founder of Paychex, whose net worth is $2.8bn, believes “the damages of keeping the economy closed could be worse than losing a few more people … You’re picking the better of two evils.”

Donald Trump is concerned that a prolonged lockdown might harm his chances of reelection. “We cannot let the cure be worse than the problem,” he said last week. On Sunday he backed off his Easter back-to-work deadline, saying social distancing guidelines would remain in place until the end of April.

But senior public health officials including Dr Anthony Fauci, director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, think this may be too soon.

America already leads the world in coronavirus cases. Dr Fauci believes we haven’t yet felt the worst of the pandemic.

It may seem logical to weigh the threat to public health against the accumulating losses to the economy, and then at some point decide economic losses outweigh health risks. As Stephen Moore, who is advising the White House, warns: “You can’t have a policy that says we’re going to save every human life at any cost, no matter how many trillions of dollars you’re talking about.”

But whose “trillions of dollars” of costs are we talking about?

Workers typically bear the biggest burdens during economic downturns, especially if they lose their jobs and don’t have enough money to pay the bills. Eighty percent of Americans live paycheck to paycheck.

Late last week, lawmakers made an important step to prevent such hardships. The $2.2 trillion coronavirus bill provides jobless Americans an extra $600 in unemployment benefits per week for four months, and includes contract and gig workers.

The bill was almost scuttled when Republican lawmakers objected that this would boost incomes of some job losers higher than their pay when they worked.

Apparently, these lawmakers hadn't noticed that the pay of the typical working American has stagnated for decades, adjusted for inflation. So a temporary boost in pay in order to get people to stay home and thereby help slow the spread of Covid-19 is hardly unseemly.

Here’s what is unseemly. The “economy” that the bankers and billionaires are eager to restart had been growing rapidly before the pandemic. But most of its gains had gone into corporate profits, as shown by the meteoric rise of the stock market until a few weeks ago.

The bankers and billionaires now urging Americans get back to work own a huge share of that stock market. The richest 1 percent of the population owns roughly half of the value of all shares of stock. (The richest 10 percent own more than 80%.)

So when they recommend Americans get back to work for the sake of the “economy,” they’re really urging that other people risk their lives for the sake of restoring the bankers’ and billionaires’ stock portfolios.

While it’s true that we can’t save every human life at any cost, and at some point may have to end the lockdown of America and accept some additional coronavirus casualties, we need to keep in mind which Americans we are talking about.

The trade-off average Americans might make between getting back to work and exposing themselves to the virus is likely to be quite different from the trade-off bankers and billionaires make, especially if average Americans have enough income support to get through the crisis.

Even four months of extra unemployment benefits may not be enough. The richest nation in the world surely has enough resources to keep its people safe at home for as long as it takes.

[strings-have-been-cut]

Building off that anger headcanon, what did you think of The Most Toys?

see the original post here

Buckle up. 

There are so many levels to this episode. It's very interesting that you would connect this one to anger - I’m sure many people do! As an audience member, I believe I'm meant to feel anger - outrage at how Data is treated, at the insufferable nature of Fajo, at all the unnecessary murders... but I don't believe Data would be inherently angry about any of it, at least not in the moment.

Data absolutely disapproves of Fajo's actions. He holds unique and historically significant artwork and inventions in very high regard. This is mentioned many times throughout the series, but the quote that comes to mind is in ‘Measure of a Man’ when he tells Maddox that something ‘unique and wonderful’ will be lost if Data himself is lost (I have a whoooole other lot of feelings about this conversation.) Fajo obviously appreciates the same things, he sees them as something to be possessed while Data believes they should be preserved and shared so others may learn from them. Aside from this, it is clear he acquired the objects the same way he acquired Data - illegally - which clearly Data disagrees with. 

Fajo seems to be just the sort of man Data strives not to be. He has no moral code and no regard for others. Fajo refuses to obey Federation law, shows no remorse at all for anything he’s done, and seems to be able to outsmart Data enough to prevent him from escaping. Already, this marks Fajo as an enemy of the Federation and someone Data may be forced to defend himself against.

“Captivity” was an accurate description. Not only is Data physically unable to leave the room, any silent protest results in Fajo threatening his employees. Allowing an innocent life to be taken on his behalf goes against his programming and moral code. He does not have the choice to kill Fajo for the force field around him, and I don't believe he would have anyway, especially not at the risk of harming someone else.

When Varria becomes involved he seems to have more of a reason to risk himself. She’s clearly being mistreated by Fajo and being used to blackmail Data into cooperation. When she asks him to take her with him, his first thought is to warn her of the possible consequences. He seems mainly concerned with her safety.

At no time does Data seem concerned with how he is being treated. He only says that he is being held against his wishes and that he does not desire to wear the purple outfit or to sit in the chair. He refers to his situation as "imprisonment" and "captivity", but does not protest being treated as an object or comment that the only other living thing in the collection is an animal. He does say to Fajo that “most intelligent lifeforms find involuntary confinement offensive and inequitable”, but doesn’t go beyond that. Basically, he knows it’s wrong, but doesn’t complain beyond reminding Fajo that what was happening would be wrong to anyone in his position. He doesn’t take it as a personal offense.

I think he is used to being viewed as an object. The number of times in his life he must have brushed off being called an object - if the entire second season of interactions with Pulaski isn’t proof enough - perhaps he just stopped arguing it. If he thought pointing out that he is a living being would have helped his case, he might have mentioned it, but in his conversation with Varia, a parallel is made between the two of them - Fajo "has them both". Not only is he aware that Fajo views him as an object, he does not think it's worth it to try and convince him otherwise. This seems to be a trend. He doesn't try to take the time to convince people of his personhood so long as they show him a semblance of respect. Maybe it is a battle he has spent too much time fighting and he doesn’t see a point anymore.

The final scene shows Data making the fire upon Fajo right before being transported, leading the audience to believe he has chosen to kill Fajo. I could see how some people might interpret this as anger. I always have taken Data's comment at face value. Just before being transported, he tells Fajo," I cannot permit this to continue." Several things could occur to him in this moment. If Fajo refused to turn himself over, he would most likely continue killing people for his own gain. He would continue to mistreat those in his debt. He could possibly kidnap other individuals and hold them against their will.

Do I believe Data was motivated by anger? No. I believe stopping Fajo was a choice made by the same logic he uses to employ the safety of others on a daily basis. I also believe his thoughts on the use of force have changed. At the start of the episode, he tells Fajo that he is "designed with a fundamental respect for life... and a strong inhibition against causing harm to living beings." I believe this evolves from "hurt no one" to an ideology similar to "the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one". Data decides that the potential lives at stake are too important to allow risking Fajo's escape. 

Why he hides it from Riker, I don’t know. Maybe he believes he will be judged harshly for making the choice he did. Maybe he thinks Riker will not understand why he chose to do it and will assume it was a malfunction. Maybe he believes he came to the wrong conclusion and he should not have fired and sees this as an opportunity to amend his mistake. 

[kinetic-elaboration]

July 28: 3x01 Spock’s Brain

Today’s ep was the infamous Spock’s Brain. I’d never seen it before and always insisted I didn’t want to but...this is a complete rewatch so I guess I kinda had to.

As predicted, it was bad. Utter nonsense for a premise and the actual execution shot through with sexism. There were some aspects that I did like but most of them have been done better by other eps--and in any case were not worth the ridiculous basis of the ep itself. Honestly, if I were watching all this live, and I waited months for this, I might have wondered if the show weren’t better off cancelled.

But I would have been wrong because the next ep is The Enterprise Incident so! Sometimes you just need to be patient.

This episode is starting out so strangely. Why is the bridge being shot from all these weird angles? And why do the colors seem...duller?

They really can spy on these other ships, huh?

“My name is Captain James Kirk.” Not breaking out the middle initial today, I see.

Chapel going for the drama as she falls down.

Kirk too, sprawled over his chair. (Makes me think of “The chair is, in fact, not bolted to the ground.”)

This honestly reads like a bad parody of Star Trek.

Ridiculous lines include: “His brain is gone.” “His incredible Vulcan physique.” “In search of his brain.” “Where are you going to look for his brain?” “It was taken out, it can be put back in.”

“Spock’s body is more dependent on his brain” than a human’s. Ummmm I feel like there’s something suspicious in there.

The only good thing about this ep is Kirk’s devotion to Spock.

Seriously why does the bridge look so different? Filming it from a different location changes everything.

When Kirk paces in front of the view screen, it really shows off how small it is.

“The spaceship that has Spock’s brain.”

I like these schematics and Chekov’s little presentation here. Also Kirk can automatically put years to all the planet evolution codes or whatever--like on the one hand, of course he can, that’s his job, but on another... what a nerd.

Honestly these people--obviously, they are underground on the ice planet. Obviously!!! I actually do appreciate this scene in general, with the bridge crew working out a problem on the bridge, which actually almost never happens--it’s definitely the best scene of the ep--but still. It’s obviously the ice planet.

Also, I like that Uhura gets to contribute. She thinks outside of the box, asks the good questions. Don’t just look at the outside evolution of the planet--ask about what the brain could be used for, and where it might be.

“Get there, find the brain.”

Oh no, he accidentally called Scotty Spock :(

“High of 40. Livable.” I realize this is a Russian joke but that’s really not that bad lol. Definitely not an ice age anymore.

“They give pain and delight.” So they’re dominatrixes?

“You are small.” Well no need to be mean about it.

Don’t you have a companion?? Love that that’s one of their synonyms for “spouse” or “partner.”

The alien men look like they’re wearing short jean skirts.

“A dead and buried city on a planet in a glacial age.” That’s a good idea. Could have done something better with that.

Chekov’s still stuck on the no women thing, I think.

Why did they dress Spock in a leftover outfit from This Side of Paradise?

McCoy and his stimulants again, waking up the alien lady after they stunned her. Multi-purpose.

“I know nothing about a brain.” Clearly.

So all the women live below ground, and all the men live above...

Ah-ha, they have found Spock’s voice.

“There is a definite pleasurable experience connected with the hearing of your voice.” This ep is almost worth it for that line.

Also Kirk’s face when he hears Spock’s voice.

I like that Spock is still funny. Honestly he’s probably funnier disembodied. This is a very humorous Spock characterization. “That is a practical idea. It seems unlikely that I shall be able to get to you.”

WHAT IS BRAIN.

They’re being quite sexist, aren’t they? “No engineering geniuses here. Only women. None of these women could ever have done surgery on Spock’s brain.” Like I know it’s that they’re obviously (or supposedly obviously) naive and childlike but like combining that with the sex segregated society and the actual phrasing of these lines (WOMEN?? Engineers?? Doctors??) plus Kirk assuming the Controller is a man (who says?) all creates this like definite sexist vibe while watching. Ugh make it stop.

How can Spock’s brain control everything? They’ve only had it for 5 minutes.

“Mistress.” I told you they were dominatrixes.

Oh yeah Captain Sulu!!

More sexist quotes: “What a way to maintain control over a man.” “I’ve certainly noticed their delightful aspects.” Please stop talking; you’re digging yourselves in a deeper hole.

(Seriously though--I feel like the unspoken world building fact here is that the women need the men for procreation specifically, which is why they capture the men, and then control them--using the “pain belts”--to have sex--the “pleasure.” They probably also use them for other labor, given the presence of the male guards and the line “they won’t help us if we don’t control them” or whatever it was. But surely the delightfulness of the women is more than their physical appearance, is what I’m saying.)

What is the commentary on gender here? Women = scary, dumb, and hot?

Yeah, how DOES Spock’s brain fit into this?

Lol at Spock’s empty body calmly watching them all fighting.

“Science will triumph.” A real lost opportunity in the AOS-verse to have Kirk say this after a bar brawl.

“You are a disembodied brain.” I feel like there’s a (McCoy) joke in here about how he’s reached his ideal state.

His body is the building. (I was right, I totally called this plot point as soon as Spock started talking about his incredibly large body and how his brain was still doing things like regulating oxygen. I must say... this is not a bad idea, except for the brain stealing part. Like there’s something in there, the idea of the complex as a body, powered by a brain. Idk.)

So basically Spock is taking another opportunity to insult Bones’ medical skills. Oh Spock, never change.

I feel like Bones is enjoying his Spock puppet, on some level.

“Pain bands.”

Use the Spock puppet, Kirk! Use it to fight the lady alien!

“The controller is young and powerful, perfect.” / “How very flattering.” LOL I can’t believe this is real.

“You took his brain. You will put it back.”

So the alien lady puts on the spiky helmet and now she’s suddenly smart. I hate thissssssssssss.

(I actually do think the idea of old knowledge stored outside of the... brains...of the current generation, for their own protection, as decided by the paternalist elders... is not itself a bad concept. Of course it’s also a concept that other eps did better, like The Apple or For the World is Hollow or even Return of the Archons. Again, combining it with all the gross things they said about women earlier just leaves a bad taste. Even though--even though!!--we don’t know who the elder people were. Like, was this a matriarchal society that saved the women in the underground because they were better? Or was it a patriarchal society that put the women in the underground because they were considered weak and in need of protection? I rather assumed the second, but I think there’s some evidence for the first, in particular, that the story reeks of Sexualized Male Fear. What’s a better combination of hot and scary than a matriarchy of women in short skirts?)

“Got your gun.” (But the other way around.)

“Our need for the Controller is more important than your need for your friend.” That sounds an awful lot like “The needs of the many outweigh needs of the one” and we all know what Kirk thinks about that. That said, he’s really not...engaging with her facially fair argument at all.

“No one may kill a man. Not for any purpose. It cannot be condoned.”

Love Scotty’s acting skills. Gotta get this gun back really fast--create a diversion by fainting! But not too much!

I do love McCoy. He’s an adventurer too. He pretends he’s not but he jumps at the chance to discover and learn. He will not hesitate to put himself in danger if it’s for the common good or to protect his friends.

“Put the teacher on.”

Now finally Kirk is engaging with the fate of the society he’s encountered lol. Like, again, he’s not wrong; they’ve stagnated under the computer/controller and it’s not moral to steal from someone else to keep your comfortable and boring life going when you could just do the work yourself, but coming this late, it feels like an afterthought. It’s also weird that she just like stood by and let them take Spock and his brain after all that to do about...not letting them have the brain. Like at the end of the day she was not so inept. Also, they never explained what happens to all the knowledge in the teacher. One would assume they’d have to access it--or not? They’re just to start from scratch? Also legit I guess. And finally... all I can really hear, in the emphasis on integrating with the men again, is “You’ll learn how to develop a society naturally and also about heterosexual sex wink wink.” (Except that as I said... I think they know about that.)

I see McCoy’s regretting that “child’s play” talk now.

“Give priority to reconnecting Spock’s vocal cords.” Yep that’s how the brain works for sure.

Wow Spock really does have to do everything himself. Including operate on himself.

“This Vulcan is telling me how to operate.”

How did he operate without...opening Spock’s skull... in any way??

Not to question the verisimilitude of Spock’s Brain lol.

Everyone’s being so rude--Spock is providing valuable last minute exposition/explanation about this weird-ass society!

It’s always odd when they don’t return to the bridge. Like, they’re not going to collect Chekov?

That was... something.

I liked a few things: any excuse for Kirk to be devoted to Spock; the humor Spock showed; I liked the bridge scene where they looked at the map of the planets; and I liked certain things about the premise of the episode, although, like I said, most of the general aspects (post-disaster society, reliance on computers, etc.) had been done better in other episodes. I liked the look into the Male Brain lol.

What I didn’t like was how outright ridiculous the basic catalyzing event was--Spock’s brain has been literally stolen like??? Are you kidding me? That led to a considerable amount of dialogue that read like a Star Trek parody. Did not like that. And of course, as I said... the sexism. I think I’ve unpacked that enough. It didn’t need to be sexist, and you can explain it in a way that’s not, but the vibe sure was. It was like... well a lot of TOS is like this imo. You can give it an A (or at least a B) for effort, but what comes out is so obviously tainted by the sexism of the creators. Like, for example, how they say they believe in women who are just as capable and professional as men, but struggle to show it. This ep wanted to show a matriarchal society but it wasn’t really a matriarchal society--it was a Freudian dream that was all about the male psyche and what it most fears and wants.

All that said.. the next ep is a D.C. Fontana creation featuring one of my favorite TOS Ladies, the Female Romulan Commander, so I will be receiving a consolation prize.

Also the AOS verse is still more sexist and doesn’t have an excuse I said what I said.

[i-will-physically-fight-you]

A Singular Cog in the Machine Chapter 3

Chapter Title: Soul and Emotion

Summary: "It was pure logic when it came down to it. Why allow harm befall the others if Logan could stop it? Surely, it was much more beneficial for only one to be harmed than for all to undergo excruciating pain and misery. A broken cog is more easily replaced than if the whole machine fell apart.“

Logan adheres to the belief that needs of the many far outweigh the needs of the one, the latter being himself. Or in other words, Logan tries to sacrifice himself for the sake of the others. Fortunately for Logan, they won’t let him get away with that.

Chapter Word-Count: 2k

Pairings: platonic lamp

Warnings: Injuries, Referenced Torture, Crying, Misunderstandings, Angst With a Happy Ending

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | End       AO3 LINK

As promised, here comes the comfort! I want to give a quick shout-out to both @delimeful and @today-only-happens-once as their own sci-fi aus helped inspire me to finish what I started with this one heh <3

-

Logan woke up alone for the first time in a long while. Approximately sixty-six cycles, five hours, thirty-two minutes, four, five, six seconds ago. 

‘Internal Clock program is running functionally,’ Logan thought as he closed his eyes, running a quick diagnosis scan. It was not...completely optimal. Parts of his code had been ravaged, leaving him vulnerable and exposed. His biological body still suffered grievous breaches. His artificial eyes were damaged, only working at 70% efficiency. 

This made viewing things from a distance rather difficult. However, it was clear enough to recognize he was not in his own quarters. Rather, he was still in the ship’s common recreation area. The “living room” as Virgil referred to it. 

He laid on the couch, swaddled in soft blankets and cushioned with a plethora of pillows. Both he expected came from Patton’s hoard in his quarters. He was almost surprised not to see a stuffed animal in the crook of his arm. The television was on, the volume lowered to only a pleasant murmur could be heard. Images of animals flashed onto the screen. A nature documentary, one that Logan had previously found to be captivatingly informative.

 “--we’ll take care of you, we’ll watch all your favorite nature documentaries, how does that sound?”

Patton had said that, he recalled. But when? He tried locating the source of the memory file. Except--

ERROR MEMORY FILE CORRUPTED.

He dug a bit deeper, finding more and more memory files in a similar disarray. He’d known this problem was occurring. But that didn’t explain the chill that swept through his body just then. A fever perhaps? No, his body temperatures remained at their normal regulated levels.

Before he could contemplate this further, his ears picked up on noises in the distance. Too far away to make it out from his position. There was a simple solution to his quandary. The ship computer. Or Odysseus as Roman insisted on calling it. He could request an audio transcript. 

Pinging...pinging...pinging…

He couldn’t reach the ship computer. That was not optimal. His only option was to investigate the noises himself.

Logic dictated he was wounded. He should remain on the couch unless absolutely necessary. He remained put, concentrating on the television. The urge to find the source of the noises would not go away. It festered, growing rapidly like a disease until he could not withstand it any longer. 

Standing up from the couch proved far more difficult than he anticipated. His torso flared in pain, his legs shaky and unstable. He gripped the side of the couch, breathing in deeply. His vision spun, distorted and decorated with bright spots of light. It took a moment for it to completely clear.

He looked down the corridor, the distance stretching into oblivion. No, that was a falsehood. It was only ten meters long. However, in his current physical state it might as well be a thousand meters.

It didn’t cause his pressing curiosity to fade in the slightest. He took a step forward, his foot stinging like pins and needles to quote an idiom of Virgil’s. He didn’t collapse. Granted, he heavily leaned onto the couch for support. He took another step forward and then another.

 He held onto the corridor wall the whole way, a small grunt of pain leaving him. The dizziness returned, but he pushed through it. All that mattered was reaching the end of the corridor. If Logan’s memory was still accurate, it should lead to the ship galley. Perhaps the others were engaged in re-energizing through fuel consumption? 

As he drew close, the noises crystallized into recognizable speech. 

“Are you sure?” Virgil’s voice asked, pointed and edged. Someone responded, much too low for Logan to catch. He gritted his teeth, propelling himself onward at an accelerated rate. His vision frizzled and crackled, everything becoming a blobby mess of colors.

“Maybe we should--Logan!” 

An arm wrapped around his waist, hoisting him up. Logan opened his mouth to protest when a wave of nausea hit him. He quickly shut it in favor of keeping his stomach contents down. The person guided him to a chair, careful and steady. He sat there, grimacing as the nausea gradually subsided from his systems.

When he glanced up again, he met the furrowed brows of Roman, Patton and Virgil. They gathered around him, forming a semi-circle. He examined them, scrutinizing every detail. His drive whirred from the amount of tests he processed in the matter of nanoseconds. Each one proving the validity of his suspicions every single time.

“You’re real.” He croaked.

They all exchanged a glance.

“Yes, we’re here Logan, you’re safe now,” Patton confirmed, laying a hand on Logan’s shoulder. A gesture meant to be reassuring except it wasn’t reassuring at all. 

“No,” Logan shook his head, “You should--cannot---I don’t--it does not make sense!”

“Why does it not make sense?” Roman asked, dropping down on one knee. He acted odd,  more muted than usual. The way his head bowed indicated a sign of exhaustion. Logan shook this thought aside in an attempt to formulate a response.

“To quote Spock from the movie Star Trek II Wrath Of Khan, ‘The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one,’” Logan said. Upon their blank stares, he elaborated, “A singular cog in the machine is more easily replaced than if the whole machine falls apart. As the ship engineer and navigator, my role is vital but replaceable, therefore--” 

Patton drove into Logan, embracing him firmly around his middle. The titekan’s whole frame shook as deep, guttural sobs fell erupted from him. Logan blinked, almost short-circuiting from this unexpected turn of events.

“I...do not understand.” Logan admitted. He glanced up at Roman and Virgil only to find them in similar states of malfunction. 

“You colossal intelligent idiot,” Roman murmured, his face dripping with ivory tears. He shoved his head against Logan’s shoulder, placing his arms around both him and Patton. “Did you really think we could function without you?”

‘‘Yes,’’ Logan wanted to say, but he couldn’t. The word wouldn’t come out of his clenched throat. Virgil was the only one left standing at this point. He was the captain, the system administrator. He was a much-appreciated source of reality.  Surely, despite his human emotions, he understood the logic. 

“Lo,” Virgil sighed, running his hand through his hair, “When you disappeared, we searched all over the galaxy looking for you. We looked for weeks. And after we found you, we’ve been taking care of you in shifts. You know why?”

Logan shook his head.

“Because you’re not a broken cog to us. You’re more than that--you’re a kraffing sentient being. You’re--” Virgil’s voice wobbled. He inhaled harshly, pushing on, “Dammit, you’re family, Logan. And it’s cheesy but we don’t give up on one another. Never.”

“Captain Fearless is right,” Roman said, and Patton made a rumbling sound of agreement.

“Oh,” Logan managed, swallowing, “Oh.”

He’d thought so much about the others’ and their importance to the system. He analyzed and calculated it all. He saw how removing any of their variables would be detrimental. But in all his calculations, he never considered how he himself affected the equation. 

“I did not--I made a slight miscalculation--” Logan breathed in, “I am sorry.”

“No,” Virgil said, stepping closer, “I’m sorry. It’s my fault. I should’ve told you, I assumed it was an understood thing. We could’ve rescued you sooner if I hadn’t second-guessed myself--”

“Virgil.” Logan said, the clenching feeling in his throat tightening. Wordlessly, he reached out a hand to Virgil. He wasn’t quite sure what he was attempting to convey. Fortunately Virgil seemed to understand. He leaned over and joined the entangling of limbs and bodies. 

‘A group hug,’ Logan’s dictionary program informed him, ‘an instance of three or more people embracing one another simultaneously, typically to provide support or express solidarity.’

They held onto one another for quite a while, not moving a single muscle. Great globs of tears were shed amongst them all; even Logan wasn’t immune to it. He rationalized it was his body reacting to the others’ emotional displays. It probably did not have to do with the strange, tingly warmth lit up inside his chest.

He would worry about this sensation if not for the melatonin in his system starting to take effect. He closed his eyes, a long intake of oxygen following this action. 

“Logan?” Patton sniffled.

“Yes?” 

“Th...there’s something we need to tell you about.”

Logan’s eyes fluttered open. He looked expectantly at Patton, waiting. The titekan opened his mouth to continue, but Virgil and Roman beat him to it.

“Patton, are you seriously going to tell him--”

“We should wait--”

“No,” Patton said, interrupting them both, “we can’t keep this from him. He deserves to know.”

It didn’t increase in volume, but Logan’s heart was the only thing roaring in his ears. Deserves to know? The only scenarios Logan could come up in his mind was his tests were faulty, wrong wrong wrong about this being real. It was all fake. A simulation, surely or worse; an experiment. The thousand eyes watching him behind a screen, shattering his hopes once more.

“Logan?” A soft hand touched his cheek, “you with us?”

“Yes,” Logan heard himself saying, “Yes, I’m here. Go on, Patton. What is it that you’d like to divulge?” 

“When we brought you back, I did a few medical scans, to try and see if there was any internal bleeding going on,” Patton hesitated, refusing to meet Logan’s eyes, “I found an AI chip in your brain.”

What? Impossible, his AI was supposed to be undetectable by scans--

“That disgusting buvah must’ve stuck it in you for the kriffs and giggles,” Roman growled, his scaled tail whipping with indignation. 

“As far we can tell, it doesn’t have a tracker,” Virgil said, “and removing it could be lethal.”

“Okay.” Logan said faintly. 

“Okay?” Roman repeated, squinting, “We just told you that you have a freaky AI chip in your brain and your response is, ‘okay?!’”

“Hey, lay off him, Princey,” Virgil hissed, “He’s been through a lot, you know that.”

“Well,” Logan began, “this is not how I expected to inform you all of the fact that I am an advanced artificial intelligence operating inside of a biological body.”

“What?!” Roman gaped at him. Virgil and Patton also stared at him, showing similar signs of duress. 

“I did not think it was imperative intel as it did not negatively impact my performance as neither an engineer or navigator.” Logan said. And while it was true, it was also a bit of a lie. The reality was that most people seemed to be wary of AIs. This was why he chose to clothe himself with a biological body to blend in, so to speak. All it took was working lungs and a beating heart for others to respect and listen as illogical as that may be.

“I admit, that perhaps that was another lapse of judgment on my part. I understand if knowing this...makes you uncomfortable,” Logan added, a weird twisting feeling settling in his gut. Perhaps he was ill? He could not find himself to meet their gazes. He tried not thinking about how that was a sign of nervousness. He was not nervous, after all, AIs do not get nervous.

“Freaky?” Roman let out a high-pitched laugh, “did I say freaky? I meant to say there’s a freaking fantastic AI chip in your brain.”

“I agree,” Patton chirped up, “You could almost say that he’s too cute to compute!”

Now it was Logan’s turn to gape at them. “It really does not bother any of you?”

“It’s like I said,” Virgil told him, a small smirk growing on his lips, “you’re family. We love you, AI or not.”

Logan blinked, slowly processing the others--no, his family’s words. It didn’t make sense. His systems struggled putting it in neat, quantifiable boxes. He feared trying would only result in his systems crashing. For once, however, he found it didn’t matter that didn’t need to make sense.

So his response to this was purely logical. In ways Logan refused to elaborate or share even within himself.

“I...find you all sufficient as well.”

[mothercetrion]

It’s Not Easy, Being in Love

Summary: Fujin is grateful that he found the courage to ask Nightwolf out. His long life has never been filled with so much happiness.

Characters: Fujin, Nightwolf

Word Count: 2631

my contribution to the growing love of windwolf... I hope you all enjoy!! :)

warning: very brief mentions of revenancy and past deaths, but it’s really mild

———

When Fujin wakes up in the morning, the first thing that he notices is that Nightwolf is not in the bed next to him.

It is still dark out, so early that Fujin has woken before the sun itself, but he notices the lack of Nightwolf’s presence in their bed instantaneously.

They live in the woods of Earthrealm. When Fujin decided to leave the Sky Temple, he moved in with Nightwolf in his humble home near the place he grew up. It is a wooden log cabin, built by Nightwolf himself, with vast clearings on either side for training, lounging, or whatever they desire. There is a lake up a pathway for swimming or fishing. Fujin can lift them into the trees so they can look out at the world around them for miles. It is a blissful location, a place that both of them are honored to call home.

Fujin rises from their shared bed, putting on warm slippers and wandering out of their bedroom. Moving through the hallways with silent steps, he pulls his long hair into a messy bun, hoping to keep it out of his way until he has the time to brush it later in the morning. It is a grand ordeal, a task that he simply has no time to conquer. He has to find Nightwolf. He is always his top priority.

A glance out the window in the kitchen confirms his suspicions. On their back porch, still dressed in his pajamas and still looking rather tired, sits Nightwolf in their porch swing. He was awaiting the sun’s rising. It isn’t the most common of occurrences—once Nightwolf learned the joys of sleeping in, he took advantage of it rather frequently—but it is a lovely sight to see him enjoying the nature he so strongly loved.

Fujin opens the door to their back porch and steps outside. Nightwolf looks up from the horizon, and he instantly smiles. “You’re up early.”

“You woke up before me,” Fujin says sweetly. He sits down on the swing and moves an arm around Nightwolf’s side. Nightwolf leans into him, allowing Fujin to easily kiss his forehead. “Is there a reason you’ve decided to partake in the sunrise?”

Nightwolf grabs at Fujin’s spare hand, pressing a kiss to the tips of his fingers. “I woke up very early and couldn’t fall back asleep. I decided that this morning was as good as any.”

Fujin nods with a soft sigh. The plague of a lack of sleep… It was an unfortunate situation. “It’s always good to start your mornings with the sunrise,” he muses. “We can always nap later.”

Nightwolf leans over to fully rest on Fujin’s shoulder, returning a sigh. “Very true, my love.”

Fujin cannot help but smile at the sentimental pet name.

It has been well over four years since he had gained the courage to ask Nightwolf to be his. It had been a decision that came with countless days, months, of thought. He refused to make any romantic moves towards Nightwolf—someone he deeply admired and cared about—without being fully sure of his feelings.

And that strong consideration was what made their love stronger. He was sure of it.

The instant that he realized that he had fallen for Nightwolf caused a whirlwind of emotions. Never in Fujin’s life had he fallen for anyone—no god, no mortal, no one. Romantic feelings were something that he desired, but he never met anyone that stirred them within him. That was… until he met Nightwolf.

He saw him for the first time in a passing glance. Raiden had welcomed him on their side for the Mortal Kombat Tournament. Raiden introduced them to one another, and immediately, Fujin found Nightwolf to be respectable. He hailed from the Matoka, a tribe that he spoke so fondly of that Fujin found himself liking them from his kind words alone. He spoke of the importance of his title as Nightwolf in his tribe; he was “undeserving of the honor” to be the best of his people. He worked to prove to them that he was worthy, and he fought to protect them from otherworldly forces.

From his words alone, Fujin knew that he was worthy of the title.

The events of the tournament came. When they were not busy representing Earthrealm, the two of them spent time together. Fujin was drawn to his focus on the future, the love he carried for those close to him, and his unique connection to forces that Fujin would never understand. They bonded over their love for both their families and for Earthrealm. Fujin found himself able to confide in him his deepest concerns, most hidden secrets, after just a few days.

When the calamitous end to several Earthrealm allies came, Nightwolf sacrificed his own life to protect the living protectors of Earthrealm from a corrupted Sindel’s wrath. Fujin was notified, and the moment he found out, he was… devastated. It was the strongest anguish he had felt in his many years of life. He knew the concerns of getting attached to a mortal, especially one who was willing to do anything for his people, but he ignored the warnings passed down for thousands of years. He became attached, and he suffered.

Months later, rumors emerged of restoring some of the Revenants to their human forms. Raiden told him while at the Sky Temple. Fujin was stunned, and he immediately expressed a desire to restore Nightwolf. Raiden teased him of his strong attachment to the Earthrealmer, and Fujin excused it as a love for his desire to protect other people. He sacrificed himself for the sake of others. He was the most selfless man that Fujin had ever met.

“If anyone is worthy of a second chance at life,” Fujin said, “it is someone as honorable as Nightwolf.”

With that, Raiden swore to his brother that he would try as hard as he could to restore him. Thus, when Raiden traveled to the Netherrealm with Johnny and Sonya, he was thankful to the Elder Gods that Nightwolf’s Revenant form came alongside Kuai Liang, Hanzo, and Jax to defeat them.

It was that evening that Raiden came to the Sky Temple and informed Fujin of the delightful news. Alongside several other valuable Earthrealm allies, Nightwolf had been restored to his former self. He was alive.

Fujin was overjoyed at the news. He and Raiden traveled together to the medical ward of the Special Forces base, where the restored Revenants were being monitored. No one wanted them to be sent to live on their own without being sure that they were mentally stable. It was a precaution, if anything. Raiden and Fujin had faith in it.

Sonya told them immediately that Nightwolf seemed well-off. He had high spirits, and he was asking if the others were safe. She also pointed out that he asked about Fujin.

The wind god went to visit him immediately. He was eating some sort of meal when Fujin walked in, and without hesitation, Nightwolf put down his fork and greeted him eagerly. Fujin had never been happier to see a man smile than he had been then.

Nightwolf was cleared to leave the medical ward that day, but a medical advisor urged for him to stay with someone to be extra sure that he would be okay. Nightwolf said that he would prefer if Fujin was there with him.

“Who better to accompany me than someone who can blow my troubles away in the wind?” Nightwolf said.

They decided to reside at the Sky Temple following Raiden’s permission to have Nightwolf as an exclusive guest. He and Fujin shared a bedroom, where they spent their days recovering Nightwolf’s strength through light training and sparring, eating, and resting if Nightwolf even slightly implied that he was tired, even if he insisted that he wasn’t.

Some nights were rough. Despite his positive outlook and insistence on not focusing on the past, Nightwolf had still undergone trauma. He still died. He was still a goon of Quan Chi, forced to be evil against his will. There were nights where Fujin would come back from a walk in the extremely early morning and saw that Nightwolf had not slept a minute. He would discuss his feelings with him, the experiences he faced, as much as he wanted until he was able to get some sleep. There were other nights where Fujin would be woken from his light slumber to see Nightwolf trembling in his bed, woken by a nightmare but being too proud to ask for help. On these nights, upon getting permission, he would hold Nightwolf as he cried; he assured him for as long as it took that he was safe. He would run his hand through his hair with the gentlest of touches, and he would ease Nightwolf to sleep and stay awake the rest of the night, making sure that he got the rest he needed.

Even though the gods did not need as much sleep as Earthrealmers (or even Edenians) to get by, Fujin found himself staying up for days to make sure that Nightwolf was recovering, and the lack of sleep began to take its toll, but he did not change his actions. Raiden asked him about his sudden exhaustion, and Fujin replied simply: “I would do it a thousand times over for him.”

But the days where Nightwolf was defeating Fujin in sparring, eating, and smiling outweighed those rough nights. Fujin saw firsthand how much stronger that Nightwolf was becoming, both physically and mentally, and it was something that made him smile if he ever thought about it. He even sometimes told Nightwolf about his incredible strides towards a happier life. Nightwolf always assured him that it was not a solo effort.

“I would be nowhere without you, Fujin,” he said. “I am forever indebted to you.”

Perhaps it was then that Fujin began to fall for him. But he didn’t realize it.

Around three weeks after beginning his stay at the Sky Temple, Nightwolf announced that he felt as though he was healthy enough to live on his own once more. He wanted to return to the States and live with his people, and he wanted to begin the rest of his life. He would still honor Earthrealm in kombat whenever his assistance was required, but he wanted to begin life on his own. He thanked Raiden and Fujin for offering their home to him, and before he left, he thanked Fujin for giving him the strength to carry on. He swore that Fujin was a lifelong ally, and he was forever indebted to him.

With that, Nightwolf went home.

And Fujin missed him.

He missed the smell of the woods that came off of him no matter what. He missed his soft humming when he was sharpening his weaponry. He missed his whispered thank-yous to the Great Spirit every night before he slept. Fujin missed Nightwolf so strongly that he wandered the Sky Temple in hopes of finding something to occupy his mind of something that wasn’t the warrior.

Three more weeks following his departure, coupled with the fact that Fujin wrote back and forth with Nightwolf nearly daily, Fujin came to realize that he had fallen for Nightwolf. It wasn’t friendship that drove him to care for Nightwolf so strongly. It was love.

In honesty, Fujin did not know what to think. Would he pursue his feelings? Was it worth it falling for a mortal? Did Nightwolf… reciprocate his feelings? He hadn’t a clue.

And one eve, over dinner, he confessed to Raiden these feelings of uncertainty. Raiden, to be blunt, was stunned.

He had always warned Fujin of the dangers of getting strongly attached to Earthrealmers. Their short lifespans compared to those of gods always left their hearts shattered. Raiden did not want him to go through that pain. Fujin simply cast his gaze away from his brother and uttered words that left Raiden silent for several seconds.

“To see him smile, Raiden… To be in his life,” he said, “is worth my heart shattering a thousand times. I need this time with him before he is gone.”

With that, Raiden knew there was no convincing him of anything different. His heart was set. He never told him to find Nightwolf, but he told him that the day was still young. Fujin had no other plans. He needed to follow his heart.

And with that, Fujin left for Earthrealm. He knew that Nightwolf lived among the Matoka in the United States, but his exact location was unknown. But he would search for miles to see him.

Fujin’s arrival was met with shocked stares from the Matoka. He said to them, “I need to speak to Nightwolf. It is urgent.”

Fortunately for him, Nightwolf was there. He pleaded him to speak to him in private, and he was grateful that Nightwolf granted him such a thing.

And with his heart on his sleeve and exactly no thoughts in his brain as to what he would say, Fujin spoke. “Nightwolf, I have traveled all this way to tell you my feelings about you. My true feelings. I… I hope that you will listen to my words with the most open of hearts.”

Fujin let out a nervous sigh. “Please know that no matter how you take these words, I care so deeply about you. These months of knowing you, these months of hoping for your rescue… I have realized how big of an impact you have made on me. I have realized just how important you are to me, and I mean that in a way that… that is far beyond the protection of Earthrealm. It’s—It’s more along the lines of love.”

Nightwolf’s warm expression turned surprised in an instant. But his smile remained as Fujin continued. “I have been warned throughout my existence that becoming attached to mortals is a mistake. But… But knowing you is the furthest thing from a mistake. Knowing you is one of the greatest things that I have been blessed to experience. There is no one in this world like you, no one that I have ever met in my life is as selfless, honorable, and kind as you. Your love for your people, your love for Earthrealm… It’s amazing. It’s beautiful.” Fujin’s hands began to shake as the meaning of his own words sank into his heart.

They felt right. It was the truth.

“I suppose that what I have come here to say is…” Fujin couldn’t help but laugh. “I have fallen for you, Nightwolf. Will you give me the opportunity to show you how fond I am of you?”

Nightwolf’s kind smile had only grown. He took a step forward and grabbed Fujin’s shaking hands, squeezing them. Fujin smiled back.

“Oh, Fujin… Of course I will.”

Something beautiful begins.

And in the present day, the sun begins to rise in a beautiful sky.

Nightwolf lifts himself from Fujin’s shoulder to get a good look. The sky quickly becomes filled with an array of colors—reds, oranges, pinks, blues. The beauty of the sky leaves both Fujin and Nightwolf speechless for several minutes. No two sunrises are the same. It’s something that they both adore beyond measure.

When the sky has become mostly blue, Fujin turns to Nightwolf with a kind smile. “Care for breakfast, love?”

Nightwolf returns the smile, and he kisses Fujin’s nose. “I would want nothing more.”

Fujin moves his kiss to Nightwolf’s lips before he can fully lean away. And there they sit, on a porch swing and in love.

Falling in love is never an easy thing. But what can make life better than someone you can love with all your heart?