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afreakingdork · 1 month ago

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You Are My Sunshine, My Only Moonshine - Chapter 16

RotTMNT x Reader

@2aceofspades had such incredible vision for this week's chapter art! I'm so glad to have been party!

Rated: Teen and Up Audiences

Relationships: Michelangelo (TMNT)/Reader, Michelangelo (TMNT)/You, Donatello (TMNT)/Reader, Donatello (TMNT)/You

Warnings: POV Second Person, Gender Neutral Reader, Anxious Reader, Introverted Reader, Stuttering, Aged-Up Mutant Ninja Turtles, Romance, Love, Love Confessions, Falling In Love, Unrequited Love, Rejection, Aromantic Asexual Michelangelo (TMNT), Bisexual Donatello (TMNT), Pansexual Leonardo (TMNT), Lesbian Cassandra Jones | Foot Recruit, Demisexual April O'Neil (TMNT), Implied Cassandra Jones | Foot Recruit/April O'Neil/Sunita, Endgame Donatello (TMNT)/Reader, Romantic Love, Platonic Love, Panic Attacks, Sexuality Crisis, Agoraphobia, Social Anxiety, Happy Ending, Fluff

Synopsis: You’ve lost most of your life to anxiety and fear. Now, in your late 20s, you are desperate to reclaim it and during one such outing you encounter the sun personified. With his and his similarly celestially inspired family, will you finally reach your goal or will you lose yourself along the way?

Also available on Ao3

First 💛 Previous

Six months.

This had gone on for half a year.

Donnie held his phone up as a pretense. There were things he could look at. He even had feeds he wanted to scroll through, but he couldn’t bring himself to move. In the last 179 days, this was the closest he had been to you. From where he was currently laid out on the couch, he had an arm craned behind his head so he could optimally hear your laughter bubble up below him.

He missed that.

He missed everything.

Waiting was necessary.

At least, that’s what he kept telling himself.

Time came with perspective and that had been at the forefront.

Mikey needed time.

As a dutiful brother, Donnie showed up like the rest of them. There had been stages. Mikey had gone through multiple routes of expression that bordered on mania to deal with his heartbreak. Donnie, being the most prone to such flights, accepted the phases best. If Mikey said he had to keep painting until he fully captured the illusive sensation in his chest then who was he to tell him to stop to eat?

The others weren’t as understanding, but they had Mikey’s wellbeing in mind.

The care was good natured in that sense, but that hadn’t meant Mikey didn’t occasionally snap. The youngest amongst them also happened to be the most powerful, both in a physical, mystical, and emotional sense, so, in the end, he got his way. If any one of them pressed too hard for Mikey to deviate from how he wanted to process his grief, then they risked life and limb. In all, it had taken three months for Mikey to work out all he needed. It had concluded by the youngest walking into the living room one day and announcing that he was ready for a new hobby. It was Mikey’s way of saying he had exhausted himself on what had come before and was ready to return to his sense of normality in his constant pursuit against boredom.

Donnie had kept his mouth shut as he wondered if that meant you would join him.

He buried the thought immediately.

He was supposed to be happy that the youngest had recovered.

He meant to congratulate Mikey with the rest of them even if Mikey didn’t understand what ranks he was joining or what he was being honored for.

Mikey lived.

Mike came out the other side of heartbreak.

Donnie felt like the one full of shrapnel.

From art to reading to eating to talking, Mikey had done what was necessary to move on.

Where did Donnie start?

He had no basis.

When he examined his connection to you, he found the first flames of attraction at best. You two had only had a few paltry conversations about interests. The only notable facet was that once the two of you started talking, the rest of the world seemingly disappeared. You would enter a vacuum sealed bubble and he liked how he had all your attention. It reminded him of the contact high he got when in the throes of a project. It was a chase he pursued when it came to construction. It percolated in certain video games. It even appeared amongst science texts that explained or laid the foundation for that which others found just as mysterious.

What did he know about you?

He knew he liked you.

He knew little else.

You had a crane game plushie, but did you collect stuffed animals?

You had movie facts, but did you enjoy watching films?

You had eaten a litany of snacks, but there seemed no commonality for a favorite.

How was he supposed to move on when he knew so little?

How was he supposed to start when everything had ended before it began?

This was his usual tipping point. He only needed the faintest interest in something to kick off a journey to becoming an expert. That first ember was a flame to be fanned and he was always in need of fire. He couldn’t even say he was flighty. When he committed to something, it was with his entire being. He found science at the age of seven and never looked back. Sure, he had projects that he had shelved, but that was because they themselves had run out their use, not their larger purpose.

You were a supernova.

A stunning and luminous explosion.

No, that was intrigue talking.

He was fantasizing without coming up with a scenario to run through.

What he had done was research. Love came in stages and he didn’t need articles to tell him that. He could break down the chemicals released in regards to fondness and spell them forwards and backwards. He knew all the internal mechanics. Those who believed absence made the heart grow fonder were too tied up in theatrics to see the point.

Being apart was about work.

You either appreciated what you missed about the person or you put in the additional effort necessary to maintain a relationship of distance. It was hard enough to navigate sharing yourself with another when they were right there. When you were separated, all of that was doubled with doubt and unknowns. Honesty was the key and communication was a house of worship. He detested the latter, but knew its barb all too well.

Yet again, none of this related to you.

He had no parts of you to miss because who he had come to know was an acquaintance at best. He had nothing to maintain because you’d never gotten to a point where that was necessary. You’d left him in the kitchen that night with an agreement to see each other again. It wasn’t even a promise. He didn’t even have your contact info. He had resorted to stealing your number from Mikey and putting it in his phone, but he couldn’t actually message you.

That would reveal too much.

He had his duty as a brother.

It didn’t matter that Mikey had actually given him the number without prompting.

It didn’t matter that the younger had asked him once or twice if he knew how you were.

Four times to be precise and it wasn’t because he date stamped any mention of your name in his recordings.

That would be absurd.

Borderline creepy.

He just had so little to go off of.

He needed knowledge.

Mikey needed time to process.

Donnie should have moved on from the crush.

After that three month marker had been announced, Donnie watched the youngest avoid his phone. Not in a sense that he stopped using it, but instead he was painfully aware of its existence. Every time Mikey got a message ping or his phone gave the slightest vibration, he would startle as if he had never seen such technology before. He would then immediately go taut in a way that said all he was fighting feral instinct to check the notification. The odd dichotomy escalated until Mikey bought an alarm clock if only to avoid setting similar ones on his phone. Donnie made it exactly one week before he had enough and took the device away from the youngest. He then threw it back in Mikey’s face and told him to call you.

In a bout of yelling, their father had been forced to step in as he had quite a bit in the passing months.

Donnie needed to make a reminder to bulk up his usual father’s day gifts this year. Splinter had been doing his best to be present. On his own accord, he had fumbled his way through online research and spoke of how the type of love didn’t matter. What was important was happiness and with that he asked if you made Mikey happy. Mikey had hugged their dad long past the point where he should have let go. Their father had held out with minor complaints that were mostly for show.

Donnie was left standing on the other side of the room.

He was the only brother to bear witness.

He instigated the event.

Why?

Did you make Donnie happy?

He hadn’t seen you in months.

By all accounts, you caused him far more misery than joy if he were to weigh the scales.

He hated the state of his acquaintanceship with you.

He wanted more.

He sulked.

Donnie sulked as you and Mikey started talking once again.

He sulked as you agreed to meet Mikey for coffee.

He sulked as you tested the waters of your new friendship.

He sulked as you realized things were still okay.

He sulked as you both remembered how you liked to hang out and went back to doing it regularly.

He hadn’t seen you, but he saw Mikey leave.

He avoided the youngest whenever he returned.

Mikey could take his time dipping his toe into the body of water that Donnie so greedily wished to dive in.

Donnie wasn’t proud of the thought.

He may have prematurely torn up some schematics because of them.

Mikey could be so altruistic.

Donnie had none of those markers.

Donnie was selfish.

Donnie was possessive.

Donnie was.

He was alone.

He was by himself in heartache and longing and there was nothing he could do about it.

Even work lost its luster. He moved like a hollow shell just to keep busy. Nothing quieted his mind, so he didn’t bother. He moved his hands for the sake of it and creations came at an incredible pace. He got praise for his speed and utility. He wasn’t over embellishing as he usually did. The machines were simple and to the point. The others made remark after positive remark, but Donnie saw the edge. They noticed immediately how he hadn’t lavished in the praise. They put two and two together in relation to what had been made.

They worried.

They knew.

Bickering had revealed his feelings, but there had enough talk.

Long nights with Leo had Donnie coming the closest he ever had to admitting they were twins. Sessions with Raph where little was said until a lot was unloaded. Joining April in reconnaissance even after he blew her cover because he couldn’t stop his mouth from rounding on his misery. Even Mikey, an unintentional catalyst for his current dilemma, had trapped him under the talk of food science and there had been light mentions of what could be done.

They all had one common response: if his feelings persisted then there was a reason.

If there was a reason then it needed to be explored.

Donnie knew that much. That was the basis for all science. The only problem was that he couldn’t and that came with its own cascade. One brother agreed he should stay away, one brother fell neutral, his sister said it was okay as long as he was honest, and the last brother told him to go for it. Paralyzed by the split decision, Donnie had opted to do nothing.

He suffered for it, but at least he owned it.

Until he saw you again.

The first time had been innocuous.

It was around the four month mark and you had come down the lair to drop off some leftovers in their fridge. There had been mention of a secondary location and you hadn’t wanted to let the food go bad. The lair had been close so you both popped in for only a moment. Donnie had been across the room, discussing something with Leo when you walked by. You hadn’t seen him. Mikey yammered on by your side, taking your attention, but Donnie had stopped to look.

He only realized how long when Leo pressed him with an annoying whistle. Donnie really needed to enact vengeance on the bird call situation. Leo had always done it to personally piss him off. Leo’s flimsy excuse of having learned them for signaling was an enormous load of crap. Donnie was translating exactly this when you passed through on the way out and made eye contact.

He watched it in slow motion.

The dip of your lashes.

The small smile that appeared on your face.

The way your lids translated how you felt about him.

How you still felt about him.

The way Mikey screamed that he’d be back later and tugged you away.

Leo hadn’t even made fun of him the second time. He’d pulled a ‘that’s rough’ and Donnie yanked Leo’s mask down to choke him. Leo had lived because Donnie hadn’t had the time to set up proper manslaughter. Donnie survived on scraps alone.

For two months, he lived on fleeting glances as you passed him by. Both of you were somehow always busy and you were never in the same room long enough to spare more than a few words. Eventually, it was six months from the heartbreak date and Donnie wandered in on you and Mikey hanging out in the living room like it was nothing.

He received no notice, but he hadn’t expected any. In fact, he hadn’t meant to leave his lab as he was deep in the construction of a shuttle, but he had gotten notice that a necessary part was just delivered. Goggles down and only oil free because he’d shucked his coveralls, there you were, sharing the same bean bag with Mikey as if it were a pillow. You were amongst a lively conversation about a mobile game that Donnie vaguely remembered Mikey had been going on and on about.

Donnie walked toward you before he could stop himself.

“Heyo!” Mikey chirped, hammering his thumbs into his device. “Y/N! Look! It’s Donnie!”

“Uh!” You squeaked out, similarly banging your screen. “J-just a sec!”

“Almost got him…” Mikey’s tongue flipped side to side.

“Ah!” You sunk back with relief and some fanfare played from both phones.

“Heck yeah!” Mikey held up a hand.

You high fived it.

Donnie had a wrench.

He wasn’t supposed to be here and he had a wrench in hand.

“Hi.” You didn’t seem to notice his folly as you looked up at him with an eager shine.

Nothing about the rocket was that pressing. “Mikey snared you as well it seems.”

You gave a sheepish smile. “You mean Leo?”

“Ugh!” Mikey grunted and moved something on his screen. “He’s playing in the worst way! He’s not even playing! He paid for a bunch of buffs so he could rush the first region and skipped all the dialog! No story!”

“Y-you have like twenty… seven…? levels on me…” You murmured.

“So?” Mikey squinted at a menu. “You’re playing. You’re trying. You called me to talk about the story last night. Then, you listened to me go on about pulling best boy in my first ten!”

“You were about to have me pull.” You giggled.

“See! That’s different! You care!” Mikey punctuated the last word with a nod.

“Do you play, Donnie?” You sent your gaze over.

You folded him into the conversation.

You cared.

Maybe he would.

Maybe he would download the game right now.

Maybe he would hack it and make himself the same level as you.

Maybe he would make himself a higher one than Mikey so you’d come to him to play with instead.

“No.” Was what came out of his mouth.

“He gets too upset about the free-to-play thing because he had a bad experience once.” Mikey finally pulled his eyes from the screen and sent Donnie a lethal gaze.

“I almost leveled the city and destroyed you all in the process!” Donnie brought up his hands to complain.

Mikey shrugged. “Whatcya doing out here? Weren’t you building a rocket?”

“You bring up a complaint only to drop it!” Donnie hissed.

“Level the…?” You looked between them in horror. “Rocket…?”

“Those events are unrelated!” Donnie rushed.

“Yeah, he’s making a rocket. Didn’t I mention that?” Mikey tilted his head and returned to tapping on his phone.

“N-no…” You gaped.

“Mikey…” Donnie grouched.

“Huh? What? You still here?” Mikey couldn’t keep a creeping smile off his face. “Y/N, wanna keep going?”

“Um…! Well…!” You sat a little straighter with what Donnie read as a plea in your eyes.

Did you need a break?

Were you having trouble telling Mikey?

You should be able to do as much.

What was the point of your friendship otherwise?

Donnie was left again, unsure, and in stasis.

“I… guess… that’s fine…” Your eyes dropped, sad, to the floor.

A guilt cropped up that Donnie offset.

He couldn’t help you with something so simple.

Rocket.

He could keep working on his rocket.

Donnie moved to leave and saw you perk up in his periphery before you wilted again.

He wouldn’t be some easy out.

“Or did you wanna take a break?” Mikey wondered in a loud way that Donnie knew was for him.

“I was grabbing a package.” Donnie spoke both remembering why he’d come out here and to answer.

“Too bad.” Mikey hummed.

You sank down into the bean bag.

“Why…?” Donnie rounded close to the couch that was beside the two of you.

“You could use a break. I’m not sure, but it’s been what… 9 hours? I can tell from how shrimpy you are.” Mikey fiddled with his phone.

You rose up enough to study Donnie.

He avoided your gaze and bore holes into Mikey as he tried to figure out what his goal was. “My back is fine and it’s been 7 hours and 42 minutes.”

“Back making fried rice.” Mikey snickered.

“Yes, because now I obviously want to rest where I am ridiculed.” Donnie touched one hand to the couch’s arm and threw the other up in gesture. “Sarcasm!”

You were still watching.

“Back curved like a wok.” Mikey’s smile split his face.

Donnie rolled his eyes to leave.

“Y-you could-!” You spoke up.

Mikey stayed quiet save the tacking on his phone.

“Yes?” Donnie watched you openly struggle.

“L-laying down… for your b-back… I mean… It might… help?” You pleaded with him. “The sofa is… um...”

He would not be your scapegoat. “My back is fine.”

“Oh…” You sank beneath your third pitfall of the night.

His stomach was gutted.

He couldn’t take anymore of your guilt.

“I’ve got to get that package. Excuse me.” Donnie left.

Just as he exited he heard a soft curse from you followed by soothing words from Mikey.

It wasn’t for him, Donnie reminded himself.

Maneuvering to the chute that he had installed so dropped packages would be safely stored below ground, Donnie opened the hatch and pulled out an envelope. Holding it and the weight of the part inside, he sighed as he made the return trip. He would have to pass the damn sitting room again on the way and slowed to make the mental preparations.

If he didn’t look at you then he wouldn’t get hung up.

Deciding that was the best strategy, Donnie moved forward with purpose and his head high.

Your voice drifted across the brick.

“L-look at this one…”

“Oh, that’s cute. I have another from that artist! Let me-!”

Donnie just needed to walk by.

Unseen, undetected.

Maybe he should have opted for a sneakier approach.

Mikey was further reclined though his phone was still in his face. “Get your package?”

“Yes.” Donnie rounded the sofa with his guard up.

“D-Donnie?” You called out.

To say he hadn’t seen you would be a lie, but you were being swallowed up by the bean bag as of now.

Pretending not to hear you would be rude.

“Yes…?” He tried to keep you in his periphery by looking just beside your head.

“We… Um… Well, we’re taking a b-break if you w-wanted to… I know you were b-busy, but…?” You held your phone close to your lips, hiding behind it.

Mikey smiled as he clearly scrolled.

Donnie stared.

There had been some sort of development that he had missed.

He wasn’t sure what.

You had wanted to stop playing, but you hadn’t used him.

Was that because he avoided you?

Why would you ask him to join now?

Mikey elbowed you.

Donnie watched on, feeling that creeping territory that said he shouldn’t be here.

You sank down in further misery.

You looked near tears.

Don’t wipe them.

They weren’t worrisome.

You were safe.

You obviously needed to process.

Mikey bumped you harder.

“I’m t-trying!” You complained.

Mikey had his phone up to show you something and frowned.

You blinked out of your concern. “O-oh… You weren’t trying to e-encourage me…?”

Mikey chuckled. “Where’s your head? I’m showing you the art I told you I was going to.”

“It’s nice…” You mumbled. “Send it to me?”

Mikey nodded back into his spot. “I’m sticking to the fanart thing. Have fun failing to invite D to hang out.”

You fumbled your device.

Invite him?

He already said he wouldn’t play the game.

Had he not been clear?

Donnie shifted his weight to one hip to think.

You took a deep breath. “T-that’s n-notI…! I w-wanted… to m-make sure you… didn’t f-feel uncomfortable be-because you thought that m-maybe we were e-excluding you…?”

“Excluding me?” Donnie reared with further confusion. “We didn’t have plans.”

You looked like you wanted to disappear into your seat.

“Okay.” Mikey sighed and let his phone fall onto his plastron. “I know you both too well. Here’s the deal.”

You made a nervous little noise.

Donnie felt the pull to flee again.

“I thought you should take a break. Y/N worried you thought you were intruding, which isn’t wrong. I know that you get all up in your head when… how do you say it? Something like, ‘your attendance isn’t expressly requested?’” Mikey gestured between the lot. “So here’s the invite: if you wanna hang out, we’re all gonna mess around on our phones. That’s like your fourth favorite parallel play. Join us! How’s that?” He turned his head with a rustle towards you.

You gave a nod that appeared to confirm your portion.

Donnie blinked once. “Huh.”

“D-don’t f-feel like y-you have t-to…” You rushed to add.

“Yeah, that too.” Mikey picked his phone back up.

Mikey moved on and you appeared to be the only one waiting for Donnie.

Donnie finally looked at you properly and you jolted.

You noticed he hadn’t been gazing directly and, after the initial shock wore off, your lids lowered with a beckoned question.

He was laying out on the couch and staring up at the ceiling before he realized it.

Pathetic.

It wasn’t even comfortable because of his battle shell.

He’d preferred to be sitting up.

The couch was too old.

“D-Donnie have you seen…?” You were on the floor, but you were almost right next to him.

Technically Mikey was closest, but you were the next.

He turned his head to look at a meme you showed him.

Had he seen it?

Yes.

He asked to see more anyway.

Mikey’s body buckled under a laugh and suddenly there was a flurry of messages being discussed. Donnie’s phone appeared as a safeguard. Conversation continued on about gossip this and breakthrough that. You kept him from being a third wheel. Nine total times you brought Donnie into the conversation.

Donnie felt oddly settled. By now, Mikey would have forgotten about him. Donnie knew his brother. It wasn’t done out of cruelty, but because they’d known each other their whole lives. Mikey didn’t feel the need to include him. Donnie was often plugged in and half listening in gatherings anyway.

Did you know that?

He didn’t care.

He ate up the attention and if Leo were here, he would have called bullshit on the many lies Donnie told just to keep your attention. Whether Mikey noticed or not, Donnie didn’t care. Mikey could be equally oblivious. On more than one occasion the youngest had feigned innocence on a topic if only to allow another person more room to talk.

Altruistic.

Donnie felt like a liar in comparison.

He wanted you to include him.

He played dumb so you would keep supposedly helping him.

He was painfully selfish.

The conversation eventually drifted.

Each person was supposedly doing their own thing except Donnie who was staring at a feed he hadn’t touched. He should try, he thought. He had only prompted you through the entire verbal exchange. It was meant to be his turn. A conversation was between two or more parties. That meant he needed to instigate something. He only had to choose a topic.

Which?

Hadn’t he treaded all over the usual ones?

What else was there to say?

This spelled doom.

You had nothing in common.

What a farce.

“Oh… Oh!” Mikey piped up.

You turned lightly to give him your attention.

“Y/N, that night market you wanted to go to finally scheduled another date!” Mikey held out his phone.

“R-really?!” You sounded excited.

Good.

Donnie was happy for you.

“Yeah, so it’s now on… Oh…” Mikey brought his device back, crestfallen.

“What’s w-wrong?” You moved to rotate your body as your head wasn’t enough.

“It’s the same nights as my Italia fair…” Mikey wilted. “I’m working.”

“O-oh…” You similarly sank.

Donnie needed to beat his passivity and he supposed this was an opportunity. “What sort of night market? There always seems to be one.”

“Y/N wanted to go to the dumpling one!”

“D-dumplings!”

You both tittered at speaking in unison.

It made Donnie feel sick.

“You said another?” Donnie directed his question toward Mikey.

“Yeah, Y/N and I were gonna go to the last two, but there was… stuff… that came up!” Mikey swiped through his phone to move on.

The period of sadness Mikey went through and the subsequent distance that had been exacted between you both.

Donnie let his phone go to sleep.

That made sense.

He also understood if you weren’t ready to go out on your own in this case. He knew what a sensory nightmare the night market was and it was not an experience he imagined anyone survived alone. Lights, smoke, yelling, and lines, he avoided that sort of thing himself if he could help it.

He turned his head enough to peek at you.

You had pulled up the night market page on your phone.

You stared sullenly at the date.

You were excited.

You wanted to go.

His lips parted, but he froze.

It wasn’t his place.

This was Mikey’s territory.

Mikey probably told you about the event.

Mikey probably knew the vendors.

“When is it?” Donnie spoke in spite of himself.

“Fourteenth and fifteenth.” Mikey bobbed his head to his own beat before he stalled out. “Wait.”

His little brother was like an emotional bloodhound.

Donnie’s eyes shot wide at his error.

He tried to bury it as he watched in horrified slow motion as Mikey spun around with a craning elbow to view him with starry eyes. “You!”

Jostled by the bean bag, you looked up, not comprehending what had transpired.

“Mikey…!” Donnie warned and sat up in preparation.

Mikey dropped right back down into his spot and started scrolling.

That was unusual.

What was he going for?

With a cold sweat, Donnie remembered their shared family calendar.

His blood pressure plummeted as he switched to trying to get his own app up to revoke Mikey’s access.

“Ha! Perfect! You’re free!” Mikey announced, beating him to it.

Donnie winced against the calendar’s color coding.

“I don’t…?” You wondered.

“Well?” Mikey shot him a look and waggled his brow ridge.

“I was only curious.” Donnie got hold of his tone and forced out neutrality.

Mikey continued to study him.

He could play it cool.

Donnie switched back to the thread he hadn’t read.

He felt his little brother’s eye hover for a few moments longer before he dipped into the bean bag again. “Really? Again? Fine… Whatever!”

You made a little curious sound at having been left in the dark.

“Nothing, I guess.” Mikey shrugged. “Seems like I’m the only one who knows how to ask questions tonight. I thought someone was going to ask if you two could go together.”

There was a whack and you squeaked.

Both men turned to find you plucking your phone from your face. “D-dropped i-it! S-sorry!”

“Silly.” Mikey hummed affection before shimmying into the bag once more.

“It was an a-accident…” You held your phone tighter to offset your shame.

You both bickered lightly while Donnie was stuck.

You could go together.

Mikey seemed fine with the proposition.

It was weird.

Wasn’t it?

How had Leo put it?

He’d said something about no matter how chill Mikey was, there’d always be an inherent weirdness to you and Donnie doing anything together.

You didn’t do that to family.

Raph had announced his faith.

If Mikey said something then he should be trusted.

Neither brother was wrong.

April had told him to be true to himself.

Donnie wanted to know you.

He wanted to have his own inside jokes.

His own shared activities.

He wanted to be selfish.

Mikey had given his blessing.

“You’re… grouchy tonight…” Your voice broke through even though your tone was a quiet one.

“Am not!” Mikey huffed in return.

A silence stretched between you and quieted Donnie’s mind.

“Okay, fine!” Mikey relented. “I just want to keep playing the game and you’re both being ridiculous.”

“T-that’s not f-fair…” You verbally pursued him.

“It’s a little fair and you know exactly why.” Mikey had a knowing tone.

Your mouth audibly clicked shut.

Mikey hummed in victory.

“Just d-dont… a-assume for… him…” The last part was spoken in near silence.

Donnie heard Mikey turn toward you.

Something he couldn’t catch was exchanged and by the time he looked, you were returning Mikey’s gaze.

“He’s here.” Mikey whispered. “Isn’t that proof enough?”

“You asked…” You responded and tucked into the bean bag.

For a moment Mikey gave an affectionate, but hopeless look at you.

He then trended upward to share that look with Donnie.

There was an obvious expectation there.

Donnie had been meant to extrapolate something from the exchange.

What was it?

He reviewed the facts thus far and tried his best to sweep away the errant thoughts.

There had been murmurs of a secondary conversation.

He heard it now and when he went to get the package.

Mikey had said you failed to ask him to hang out, but that had been a joke.

Hadn’t it?

Donnie searched Mikey.

The younger only gave him a knowing smile before his gaze dropped obviously to where you were still hiding.

Did that mean you wanted to spend time with him?

Donnie was speaking before he could stop himself. “I can’t say I enjoy events like this. I won’t know the chefs. I prefer to critique outdoor food prep as it’s never up to New York code. I won’t conjure a peppy demeanor. The sounds. The sights. I will surely be in a bad mood.”

That sounded terrible.

If he was trying to sell himself he was doing the opposite.

Was he trying to talk you or himself out of going?

You and Mikey were painfully quiet.

Mikey was right; he was too much in his own head.

His eyes closed.

“I d-don’t mind any of that…”

Right.

It didn’t matter with who, you just wanted to go.

He was moronic for letting his little brother convince him otherwise.

You needed a body and barrier for the crowds.

It didn’t make sense for you to go alone.

Donnie didn’t want to be used and yet here he was offering himself up.

He held off a sigh.

That was his own doing.

“I d-don’t… e-expect you to… be Mikey…” You were firm even in your stammer.

His pupil trailed off, afraid to search for you.

“You’re… you.”

Him.

“As l-long as M-Mikey d-didn’t force you…? Um… I-if you really d-don’t mind going…? I… w-want to go…” Your legs slid out of his vision as you pulled them up close to your body out of fear.

You.

“With you…” You looked straight at him. “I want to go… with you.”

There was a moment where Donnie could only hear his heart in his tympanum.

“It’ll be fun.” Mikey interjected casually.

You nodded a little too furiously.

How did you do that?

Donnie thought his heart might escape the cae of his chest. “If you’re that determined and don’t mind my lack of enthusiasm then I suppose it’s settled.”

“D-don’t you want… d-dumplings?” You turned to him with a sort of offense.

“A dough with a wide ranging definition?” Donnie shared a look he hoped translated some levity.

You took note of it and pouted.

He smiled.

Your features softened and you gave one of your own. “W-we’ll f-find one y-you like.”

Donnie gave an interested hum.

He did like an objective.

“Good for you, Y/N.” Mikey spoke encouragement. “You can finally check something off the mega list.”

Donnie blinked once towards his brother and back to you. “Mega list?”

You flushed and disappeared from his sight. “I-it’s nothing!”

Mikey clucked with laughter. “Y/N is actually a fiend at making lists. I called it the mega one, but it’s like their anxiety bucket list of things they want to do someday.”

“You make lists?” Donnie turned an alluring gaze on you. “Let me see.”

You made lists.

He loved that.

He could barely contain himself.

There was so much he didn’t know.

He wanted more.

He wanted every detail.

He was voracious.

“It’s not…” You started to protest, but moved to flip through your phone before offering a page up. “D-don’t expect m-much… M-Mikey m-made it seem b-big… but it’s just a few things that I’ve n-never been able to… do…”

Donnie took great care in plucking your device out of your grasp and read.

Dumpling Night Market

Planetarium Show

Theater Performance

Amusement Park

Donnie smiled. “Nice formatting.”

Mikey hummed agreement.

Donnie rolled his eyes and held your phone out.

You took it with a tentative look in your eye.

“It took forever to convince Y/N they were ready for even one list item.” Mikey mentioned to Donnie before looking at you. “I’m really glad you won’t miss it again.”

You gave an excited nod and held your phone close.

“I will escort you with that in mind.” Donnie told you.

Mikey put a hand on your head. “Now, kids! I better see you back by curfew!”

Mikey was scolded from two sides until he couldn’t contain his laughter.

You were late.

You were so late.

Your keychain thumped in tandem with the lightweight bag against your hip as you ran. Plowing forward, you did your best not to bump into anyone. You managed, but still received several dirty looks. Trying to shrug them off as you felt bad enough, you hit a crosswalk buzzing with traffic. Mingling with the others, you checked your phone to find Donnie’s last message was the one confirming he’d meet you there.

You hadn’t meant to be late.

You wanted to meet him beforehand.

You’d wanted to talk to him in a place where you didn’t have to battle against the noise of a crowd.

You wanted more time.

You were finally going to see him.

There was a blip and pedestrians were given the go ahead. You picked up the pace and moved with the throng as you grew closer to your destination. Only a few streets away from the night market, you jogged as best you could with the thickening crowds. The group was converging on the same place and your heart sank as you realized it would be nearly impossible to find Donnie.

That was until you saw him, lifted above the other heads with his goggles down, and doing an obvious scan of everyone entering.

You moved as obviously toward him as you could and when he spied you, he clicked his goggles up and dropped down from whatever had lifted him. Within a few more steps you were united and he snagged your arm against the pull of the crowd before gesturing behind him. You trailed with him, trying not to linger on the warmth of his touch until he tucked you in beside an open area of fence.

You were with him.

You were finally together.

For every terror you had about this event, it was immediately either worth it or forgotten.

“Let’s see…” Knowing he wouldn’t lose you gave him the confidence to observe you. “Your footwear is sensible. Perfect and what’s this...?”

He turned his hand over in an obvious gesture as he carefully took the Black Bean plush clipped to your bag.

“A good luck charm…” You told him.

He appraised it and you with an appreciative eye before he released. “I find your outfit commendable.”

You looked down at yourself with a smile. “I thought long and hard. I have this bag so it’s easy to get to my stuff without being a pickpocket target. I tested out to make sure the plush wasn’t going anywhere. These are my most comfortable shoes and I picked clothes that didn’t stick out or have loops so I won’t get caught on anything!”

When you brought your gaze up, you found him staring with large eyes.

“U-uh, i-is s-something w-wrong?! I t-thought…” You almost wished you had an errant sleeve to tug on.

“No.” He reached out tenderly and took both of your hands. “Nothing at all.”

“I-I?!” You squeezed him. “Then w-what is it?”

He shook his head.

There was something to him.

The carefree nonchalance said everything was as it should be.

You believed him.

“Can I also assume you have a plan of attack?” He asked with a bright gaze.

You perked up.

All your planning was not only worthy, but requested.

You pulled from him immediately to get your phone.

He leaned in and you showed him the map you had drawn up. “I researched the past events and then tiered the vendors based on what we have to get. It’s impossible to eat everything, unfortunately.”

You peeked at him and found that same warmth on his face.

It translated to yours and your lips warbled in not knowing how to ask what was stirring him.

Whatever it was, you hoped it kept up.

You felt indebted to him.

Both because you could finally spend time with him and attend this event.

You wanted to do anything that would make this outing easier for him.

You wanted to do anything for him.

You liked him.

Overwhelmed by a rush of butterflies, you pointed out a nervous finger. “I-if I h-had gotten h-here earlier, w-we could have g-gotten at line for the m-most popular booth… N-now I doubt it’ll m-matter… They’ll s-sell out…”

“I’ll monitor. I can estimate crowds and chart approximate movement.” His chin bobbed and with a sharp snap his goggles fell into place over his eyes.

You hid your giggle behind your phone.

His observation skills were adorable.

It was hard to recall the time you dreaded them.

You guessed that was the case for everything in your life as of late.

“Show me your map once more. I’ll log it.”

You adjusted the size and held it up to him.

His goggles made no sound, but his head eventually moved away with a purpose that said he got all he needed. “Only three people are in line at booth option 104. Let’s move.”

You gave yourself one last mental pep talk as you walked. While you coached yourself, Donnie took the lead position in line. Once there, he appropriately judged the people in front, the vendor, and then finally you as he turned to speak.

His mouth was open when you realized you hadn’t started a single conversation the entire time you’d been with him.

You hadn’t even told him hello.

You went straight into a stupid spiel about yourself before tending to the one man you wanted to take care of more than anything. Flushed at your sudden mountain of failures, you waffled on options and made a pitched sound. His brow cocked an exaggerated high for you to see and he closed his lips so you could take your turn.

You had interrupted him on top of everything else.

You could not be ruining this date anymore.

Date.

Where your cheeks were already hot, they exploded.

That wasn’t what this was.

You were barely friends.

You’d barely seen him in 7 months.

Half a year was the time lost from when you told him you liked him in his own kitchen.

You presumed nothing.

You had gone through this already.

You had no idea if he still liked you.

By all accounts, he seemingly didn’t.

In all the small moments you had seen him since, he hadn’t reacted at all. You’d tried sending your lingering intentions to speak to him with your eyes alone, but none of them had coaxed him. You had worked so hard to be appealing. You didn’t dare consider it flirting, but you had looked up non-verbal techniques from ancient magazines. There was a shifting gaze under your lashes that was supposed to be alluring. You’d practiced it for hours in a mirror until you attempted it on him. He hadn’t even glanced at you for more than a second before he was gone. You did it wrong, you were sure after that, but you tried again and again.

All until Mikey had taken notice and asked why you were giving Donnie the stink eye.

You had nearly burst into tears.

A few talks later and Mikey encouraged to actually talk to Donnie, but that was easier said than done.

You need to get his attention, but catching him felt more like hailing a busy waiter in a restaurant. Walking up to him out of the blue was a moot point. The tenuous steps you would take in his direction would undoubtably match the time necessary to talk yourself out of it. All you could do was wait for his attention. For weeks, then months, you waited with darting eyes and hope he would walk your way, but he did.

He caught you off guard by appearing on a day when Mikey said he would be busy. Despite failing that conversational tree in every way possible, you still ended up here. All your previous worries were founded as here you were, once again getting ahead of yourself on top of a mounting trash pile of shortcomings. Your lip warbled and you felt your throat tighten around sound, but it was swallowed up by the crowd.

The line moved.

Donnie took his dutiful step with it.

You followed after and stared at the ground.

What were you doing?

You were wallowing.

You rolled on the bottom of your comfortable sneakers.

Their cushions kept your feet safe.

You were safely buried in your own psyche.

It felt like too much was on you.

You needed to lead.

You needed to have a good time.

You needed to make sure Donnie did too.

Feeling mixed up, you screwed your eyes shut.

The only thing you could thank the crowd for was that it blanketed your misery.

For now you were alone in your cold, dark mind.

The empty void where time wasted away.

A smell wafted up to your nose.

One of many that seemed to come and go, this one lingered.

Cracking an eye, sound rushed you first before you realized a small brown tub holding two dumplings in it was being held at your chest level.

It brought your eyes which you traced up to find Donnie’s arm extending them.

He was on the other side with a casual look on his face and his own boat in his other hand.

Your breath came out stuttered and you looked back to the vendor where you were clearly in the way of the line.

You scrambled a few steps to the side while murmuring a string of apologies.

Donnie followed after, still trying to get you to take the dish.

You grabbed it with both hands. “I don’t… I didn’t tell you what kind… I’m sorry. You had to pay and-”

“I got the one you marked: traditional vegetable momo, aka the most famous at the stand along with the spicy dipping sauce, which was mistakenly placed in my container.” Since you freed his hand up, he plucked the little plastic cup and placed it into your boat.

“But…?”

“Your list.”

You looked down at the faint steam wafting from your food.

“Your plan was thorough.” He urged you to go ahead and used a toothpick to scoop up one of his momos.

You rushed to catch up to him and took an immediate bite. Piping hot to the point it scalded, you blew out a few times before the flavor and juices hit your tongue. You then shot starry eyes in Donnie’s direction which he received with a nod. “There’s this girl-” You were careful in pouring a bit of sauce over your other momo. “-she’s obsessed with any kind of chili oil and makes it look so good, but I’m a little scared it’ll be too much.”

“A girl?” He asked as he chewed.

“Someone I follow on social for food in the area. Her videos are so good and she’s super honest. I can’t go to sleep until I’ve watched one. It’s a good thing she posts daily!” You took your second bite with a bit more care and felt the spice blend mingle into the dish. “So good!”

“Quite.” Donnie tapped his tech gauntlet.

Your mouth was full so you couldn’t ask, but you tilted your head in question at his action.

He extended his arm to show the screen had a list of what he would eat and his ratings. “Michael told me to bring back a full report. He knows not what he’s wrought!”

You giggled as you swallowed. “I like doing that t-too! I can look back and think ‘yes, I did love the veggie one!’”

Donnie made it obvious as he added another table and punctuated it with your name. “How many categories would you like to rank them on?”

You stepped a bit closer to him and took his boat to free up his hands. “I’ll stick with one.”

Donnie had a slight wrinkle to his beak in judgment, so he added notes for item, stall, and then an open blank for review.

You dictated your thoughts to him and he took them down word for word.

You watched him then switch back to his own list where he noted food temperature.

He wrote until you built up enough steam yourself. “Donnie…?”

“Yes?” He didn’t look up.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?” He wanted to linger on his review, but he drug his eyes to yours.

You saw a clear expression there.

Had he really not noticed?

He usually noticed when you were upset.

Had you banked on that too much?

This was an easy situation to get over-stimulated in.

Did he just not care?

You had no idea where he stood.

“Y/N.” His head lowered some, closer to your vision.

“Y-yes?”

“For what?” He pressed again and one corner of his lips turned up the slightest amount.

He had known.

You hadn’t overestimated.

He cared.

He just wasn’t making it a big deal.

Because it wasn’t.

Your heart filled and you gave him a watery smile. “I was so excited I forgot to say hello!”

His lips expanded with a bit of bright teeth. “True. You were so tardy that it interfered with our entrance.”

You jolted. “I’m sorry! I s-swear I had packed everything in my bag, but suddenly I couldn’t find my emergency kit and I can’t leave home without it!”

“Emergency kit?” He took back his trash and yours with some amusement.

“It’s…” You looked up the top corner of your vision in an attempt to seek out a way to explain it without making you sound insane. “Not… like a first aid kit, but a kit… to well… Um… Cover anything? It has bandages, burn gel, mint chapstick, a to-go pack of antacids, a fishing line, an emergency blanket, hand sanitizer, a granola bar….”

Donnie eyed you with a growing smile.

“Everything's tiny!” You made a box with your hands no bigger than your fist. “The whole thing is like this! It’s compact!”

“Tell me about the fishing line while we head towards number seven on your list; the line has been moving fast.” He swept a hand, but led toward said stall.

You followed after trying to explain how fishing line could be used for not only its intended purpose, but also as thread for clothing or stitches. You went into far too much detail about its utility for your liking and hadn’t realized until it was too late that you’d launched into a story where you’d once helped a friend with it when her bra strap had broken. He seemed undeterred by your babbling and eventually took his turn in explaining his battle shells. They had a litany of their own emergency provisions and you eventually had soup dumplings in hand. This time you let them cool and you shared that you had misplaced the kit because you’d refreshed its supply of stomach medicine for just this event.

“Worried about adventurous eating?” Donnie gestured to his dish.

You gave a guilty nod.

He pushed no further and switched gears to eating and exchanging notes.

Both from the delicious dumpling and because Donnie had not only indulged, but sympathized with your preparedness, you were warmed. He took extra time writing his review and you watched him unabashedly. Letting affection leak on your face, you only wanted to know more. You wanted to know what he thought about every stall even if you couldn’t eat at them. You wanted to walk with him and learn about every invention he ever made. You wanted more of those not so sly confirmations that he was present when with you.

When he finished and moved to pass you a comment, you hadn’t had time to put the love struck expression away.

You also didn’t bother hiding it.

You watched him take it in before he gave a metered one of his own that held a tinge as if it couldn’t be helped.

“Hi.” You spoke the syllable in a voice that sounded melodic to your ears.

It caught him off guard and his brow bent. “Hello…?”

“I wanted to… thank you for coming with me.” You shifted your weight and tried your best to open you body language.

You wanted to hug him, but had no idea how to initiate.

You didn’t like relying on him, but it was all you could do.

He studied you very closely before he seemed unsure in offering one of his hands.

You remembered how he’d grabbed you when you’d entered the night market.

It warmed your cheeks and you slid your fingers past his palm to instead grasp his forearm.

He allowed it. “Glad to be here.”

You moved your other hand up as a signal.

“I’ve been pleasantly surprised.” This time he placed his arm into your hand to match the other side.

You held steady as you ramped yourself up for more.

“The crowd is otherwise tame.”

You moved your grip up to his elbows.

“The food’s been enjoyable.”

You stepped into his space.

“I can’t say I mind the company.” He spied you.

Your shoulders rose, sheepish.

“I wonder…” His head lowered, but he pointedly looked away as if searching for something else. “You seem to want something.”

“Y-yeah…?” Your fingers curled around his upper arm.

“You can’t hide a thing on that face of yours.”

“My face…?” You tried to look up to him, but he was already there, hunched close.

You were caught by the teasing in his eyes.

He chuckled lightly and moved to encase you.

You were ready to return his affection when you caught a glimpse of someone walking by.

You dipped out of Donnie’s hold and started jogging towards that direction. “Donnie! One is open!! Number one! The number one!”

You couldn’t look back where you’d left him behind.

This seemed like your only chance.

He appeared with longer legs to surpass you and snapped up the first spot in line at the stall against several other people trying to do the same.

You joined him at his hip and sent him the full brunt of your gratitude.

You didn’t feel great about ducking him, but you hoped he understood.

You never saw his face as the vendor had his attention.

“Good timing!” The man at the stall cheered. “I just got a fresh batch ready. Almost ran out, but my son came through!”

“This early?” Donnie had a judgmental tone.

You bumped him lightly as you tried not to dance in place.

“You see…” The man opened a steamer and disappeared in a meat-scented blaze. “I usually have a surplus, but there was a party earlier today and my best staff member is on maternity leave!”

“I see…” Donnie nodded, evaluating.

“Surprise boy! Three weeks early.” He placed three dumplings each in two bags. “You won’t see me close. We shall continue on!”

“Good luck to both of you.” Donnie paid and took the food which he immediately passed off as you couldn’t wait.

The man cheered behind before taking the next customer’s order.

Your hands were warmed and you cradled both crinkling sacks while staring through the steam at Donnie. “I can’t believe you tried to sass number one!”

“I’m allowed judge. You got your results.” He cocked a lazy grin as he pinched his portion free from your hold.

“I didn’t think we’d get these!” Your grin was so wide you felt the wafting mist brush your teeth. “I can’t wait. I’ll deal with the burns tomorrow!”

“The list says bao, but there are a litany of varieties. They need to stop curtailing their naming conventions for Americans… What kind are they…?” Donnie pondered as he searched for something.

You secured a bit of fluffy dough and sank your teeth into the scorching softness.

This was the stuff famous stalls were known for.

You couldn’t help it.

You tossed your head back and gave a full mouthed moan.

You heard a shutter click and shot to attention.

Donnie lowered his phone from where he’d spun around to take a selfie with your euphoric moment. “Good one.”

“H-hey!” You tried to grab the device.

He pulled it away before showing you the well composed image.

You didn’t look bad.

You looked ecstatic.

You dropped a certain level of your complaint.

“Come on…” He held out a hand and flapped his fingers for you to give him his compliment.

“You should have asked.” You told him as if that was a tip and stuffed the rest of the bun in your mouth.

“Well I never!” He feigned a scandalized gasp.

You hummed the notes of ‘I can’t hear you’ as you chewed.

He took another photo and you chased him. “But those cheeks!”

You swallowed hard. ”Donnie!”

“Cute.” He jeered and led you purposefully to another stall.

You bumped annoyed into his battle shell as you waited behind him.

“This one wasn’t listed…” He spoke with a new cadence as if he hadn’t realized where he’d gone.

“Huh?” Your phone was out as soon as his goggles came down. “How can that be…?”

“It’s not on the vendor map.” Donnie turned and pulled his goggles up in time. “How do you account for a situation like this?”

“Try it!” You pulled eager fists up. “A surprise contender!”

He chuckled and seemed to remember his last purchase which he munched on until it was your turn to order.

He quizzed the stall owner on their admittance to the market and came to learn they had slipped in last minute due to a friend of a friend. Donnie openly criticized the sloppy admission process, but you still came away with a set of gyoza. You listened to him pout as you ate yours and eventually prompted him to try. He was only slightly abated by how tasty they were and you cycled through stall after stall.

Talking all while you walked and ate, you eventually grew fatigued of all the wrapped foods and got a pair of fruit teas in bags. The dark coloring and vague menu meant you hadn’t known they were packed with grass jelly which Donnie choked on with his first sip. Put off from the texture and experience, he dumped his while you sipped more carefully on yours. A drink a little too large, you ruminated over wasting it, but it also weighed heavily in your hand.

While you switched it to your other palm, Donnie tapped your shoulder and gestured for you to follow him. You trailed after and he brought you to a clear spot against a planter box. He hopped up to sit on one side and you stared at its height. It was something you would have to jump up onto you and you weren’t prepared. Struggling further as your drink wasn’t really made to be put down, Donnie took it. You thanked him abysmally as that wasn’t a solution to your true problem. You didn’t have the best track record with getting up on high seats, but you willed with your entire being for this to work. Lowering your core, you hopped up the best you could.

You missed and scraped your leg as you slid back down to your feet.

Humiliated and hanging onto the planter for dear life, you waited for the inevitable shutter of Donnie immortalizing your humiliation.

Only the sounds of the market continued to drone on.

Peeking at him, you found him looking ahead where his eye darted lazily as he people watched.

You jumped, but missed yet again.

This was the part where Mikey would swoop in.

This was the part you assumed Donnie would too.

Your failing.

Waiting to be scooped up like the child you were, again nothing happened.

This time checking on Donnie found him reviewing the map.

“You’re… not…?” You murmured even though you hadn’t meant to.

“Not what?” He didn’t give you his eye and flicked his thumb to scroll. “We’re nearing the end of your required targets. When we return, let’s get a sweet bun so our taste buds don’t fatigue as quickly since we had a failing in our… drink debacle.”

“Sure…” You looked down at the brick you clung to.

Was he downplaying again?

If you asked, would he help?

You had several more questions stewing, but for the first time tonight you narrowed your gaze and told them no.

Uncharacteristic of yourself, the negative thoughts shirked away into the recesses.

You were tired of it.

You were tired of missing out when none of the things you’d worried about had once gotten in the way. Tonight was a rousing success and you weren’t even feeling that sense of doom that happiness would inevitably lead to ruin. It felt only like everything was as it should be and with a heave, you hoisted yourself up onto the planter and right next to Donnie’s side.

He gave a light chuff. “Look what Raph just sent me.”

Careful and with a certain distance, he tucked an arm behind your back to stabilize himself as he leaned in to show you the projected screen on his gauntlet. You looked at it and felt yourself sinking into his presence. Everything he did tonight was calculated and non-intrusive. While he helped lead, everything he did was orchestrated from your plan.

You giggled for many more reasons than just the video he showed you. Donnie hummed a sort of affection and swiped so a related video would come up. It almost seemed like he wanted to hear you laugh again. He wanted you to be happy. He wanted to share his light with you as it was shared with him. You leaned in enough that you could play it off as bumping his shoulder, but you gingerly rested your head against him.

He stilled.

You lifted off and commented something about what you had just seen.

You gave him cover.

You made a mistake.

You assumed.

Just because one wanted their companion in good spirits didn’t mean they had adjunct feelings.

That was fine.

You were here with him.

You were having a great night.

It was okay that his reply was taking too long.

You had misjudged his intention.

You knew your place.

You wouldn't touch him again.

That almost hug earlier would have been too much.

It was a blessing that you had interrupted it.

You logged the information.

It was fine.

You were fine.

His arm shifted and he gripped the brick on the other side of your hip which tucked you in against him.

From the side of his body to his entire arm, he pressed around you.

It was your turn to tense.

He didn’t shirk away and brought up another video.

Still waiting for his retreat, you let that one cycle for exactly one minute until you found he hadn’t moved.

Was that an offer?

You were terrified to find out.

Yet your head tipped and pressed against him a second time.

For a millisecond every one of your atoms screamed guilt.

He squeezed you ever so slightly.

It dispelled your concerns in an instant.

He’d been startled just as you had.

You felt drunk off the moment and laughed a little too loud as a lovebird tossed a toy in a jealous fit.

Scrolling there and onto other videos, you spent so long going back and forth sharing things that you only sot of registered that the crowd was tapering off. Donnie shut his gauntlet down while clearing his throat and said the timeline would need adjusting. You hopped off the planter for a relatively alright landing. He stood next, showing you your drink bag that loosely hung from his wrist and tipped his head toward the trash. You nodded furiously, thankful you had an excuse to get rid of it, and he made the quick trip to dump it.

You followed after him, having made some mental adjustments to the schedule and you shared them with him. He agreed with your calculations and together you rushed one line. There you each got dampfnudel and meant to take it with you to the next stall. The line there appeared to be good cover so you could eat your current faire, but time caught up with you. You were still waiting with empty trays after the German dish was devoured. You hummed nervously as you looked across the walkway to see the final stall on your list, your last must have, looking like they were about to close.

You bumped Donnie in your anxiety.

He only had to take one look to see what your concern was. “It would make the most sense to split up.”

“You’re right…” You nodded, trying not to show how downtrodden you were.

“I’ll be quick.” He brushed by you as he slipped away.

You meant to watch after his form, but he spun around and walked a mechanical backwards toward the stall so he could watch you instead.

You giggled and, at first, covered your mouth before you shifted to cup your lips. “Behind you! Your left!”

Donnie dodged a group of kids who rushed around his feet.

He sent you a thumbs up before he neared the cart and finally turned around.

“Move!” Someone behind you shouted and you scrambled as your line moved.

Heart thudding out of your chest for more than one reason, you only spared Donnie glances where he seemed to be talking to the vendor for a little too long. Knowing that probably meant they were sold out, you resigned yourself to having missed one. The trip was nowhere near a loss, but there was something frustrating about getting so close to a perfect run. Stepping forward one last time, you felt Donnie near you and turned to find him toting one single cup.

You looked over it and then him.

He held it just out of your reach.

“What’s up?”

“The last of the night was sold ten minutes ago.” He looked over his holding.

“Then what is…?” You moved up on the tips of your toes to try and look inside.

“How did you put it? Try something new when there’s a surprise contender?” He finally lowered the object so you could see inside.

You spied a splash of warm looking stew topped with a few springy balls of dough.

“I told him about your conquest and he found it impressive. He made me wait as he showed me his dinner. He said it was Madombi that his sister made. He insisted it fits the dumpling theme and that we take some. He talked up his sister’s cooking and forced me to accept an invitation to his brick and mortar restaurant. He tried to give me an entire pot, but I bargained him down to a sample.” He passed you the dish.

You took it with radiating surprise.

“I hope it's suitable… It was the best I could do.”

“Donnie-!”

“PAY ATTENTION!!!” The guy behind you looked to be one step away from body slamming you.

Donnie rose to his full height and glowered down at the man. “We were in the middle of a conversation.”

The man made a peep very much like a scared chicken.

Turning, Donnie tucked a hand behind your back and led you the few paces forward that had you fallen behind in line.

“You didn’t have to…” You murmured, cradling the warm cup.

“True. I wanted to.” He clarified, his hand not moving.

You snatched a spoon from the closest stall as you hadn’t gotten utensils and worked carefully in creating a perfect little bite.

You felt Donnie watching you and the line.

Once you crafted everything you hoped, you held it up to him. “You s-should get the first bite…”

His face was painted with affection. “It’s for you.”

You didn’t relent and only said, “If you d-don’t want it, that’s one t-thing, but…”

He came down in a snap bend and popped the tip of the spoon in his mouth while maintaining eye contact.

You inhaled sharply and watched intently as he came away from the utensil clean.

He then adjusted his posture and considered the taste.

You came away from the one heart throbbing interaction and went straight into the next as you now saw your spoon as an indirect kiss. There was always the option to get another utensil, but you used the excuse of the line stepping forward to abandon that and got your own bite. When you came up to share your thoughts, Donnie was making notes and had your section ready. You dictated your thoughts for him, but you were cut off when the vendor suddenly asked, “What’ll it be?”

“O-oh, can we get two…?” You checked the menu and found it to be a sleek one food item and one drink. “… bowls, please?”

The worker thanked you and you took a turn to pay while suddenly feeling terrible that you barely had all night.

Now juggling three containers, you turned them to Donnie where he took one of his own.

The two of you walked out of the way of the grumpy man behind you and you debated cross contamination in finishing both dishes so close together.

“I need to pay you back…” You murmured and ate the last bite of Madombi.

“Hm.” There was an airy dismissiveness to Donnie’s tone.

You shot him a look that he pretended to ignore as he sipped the broth from his cup.

You shook your head at him and worked through your new offering while sharing your thoughts. There was another pit stop at a trash can where you worried over how filled they were and all the trash that had been created by this event. Donnie spoke of future technology to deal with waste and you listened with warm interest as he did a good job in simplifying the technical jargon. When you praised him, he only said he had years of practice with a haunted look.

Knowing the audience he was referring to, you gave him a wrinkled gaze. “Do you want to get them something to-go?”

Donnie’s beak scrunched up.

You giggled.

He waved the thought off, but you could tell you planted the idea.

You didn’t make a big deal out of him bringing back up his list and scrolling back through it to see if any contenders were applicable for transport. You mentioned the bao and he seemed to like the idea. You both then wandered with a belly filled saunter back towards that stall.

Night truly reigned over the market as many of the stalls were no longer lit. People were leaking out of the space and seemed to appear between pockets of light from overhead lamps. You drew close to Donnie and were just lulled enough to consider taking his hand when you reached the bao stall to find it closed.

“Well! That’s too bad!” Donnie seemed pleased until something else occurred to him. “We… did we complete your list?”

“I think so…” You got your phone out to double check and listed the stalls you meant to try.

Donnie filled in each notation with what you’d eaten.

“That’s… all of them…” You slowed and stared at your phone with a growing gooeyness to your gaze.

You’d done it.

You’d managed to do the event.

You’d completed your quest with only minor delay.

Now it was over.

Watching your screen darken, you felt a tug in your chest. There was no excuse now and it had been a few hours since you met. You and Donnie would go your separate ways. It seemed all too fast and there no longer seemed like enough time. In a small fit of dismay, you turned that worry up to him to find him scanning the market with his own urgency.

A bubble of hope said he felt the same.

“Walk me home…?” You whispered as quiet as you could, fearful of your own boldness.

You watched the question permeate him regardless and he came down at you with metered lids. “Of course.”

You gave a withheld nod, joy flooding where you earned yourself another block of time with him.

You might have been projecting, but he seemed just as happy for it and he gestured for you to lead.

You feigned a courteous bow before doing so and he moved beside you to give you his closing remarks on the whole event. He held nothing back, complaining loudly of disorganization and poor line management. You watched on with an obvious fondness. Even though he pulled eyes with his volume, you liked how honest he was. It was how he always carried himself. It felt as though you never had to worry about bothering him because he was going to abashedly let you know the moment something did.

In your distant periphery, you saw a huge swing of movement.

It was a stark contrast to the people meandering around and you slowed.

Donnie took a few more steps before noticing and you got a clear view across the lot.

Just outside of the market proper, there was a stall set up. Something informal, a man stood before a giant flaming pot. He swung high with some type of squeeze bottle in hand and spiraled out what appeared to be dough in perfect coordination. He had amassed a small crowd and you saw another man behind him scoop golden loops out of the burning pot with a comically large spider. The two moved in perfect harmony and you saw fried spirals fly between them.

“Jalebi…” You spoke with knowledge you didn’t possess as you hadn’t actually seen the dish crafted.

“Pardon?” Donnie fumbled back to your side while also trying to catch what you were looking at.

“I’ve never seen a jalebi stand for real.” You told him, mesmerized as more dough was spun. “There’s videos of street markets online, but never one here. They have it at restaurants, but you don’t see this part…”

Donnie finally located the stall in question and griped. “That is not legal. An open flame like that? They’re begging to be run off.”

You moved closer to Donnie as his complaint broke your intrigue.

He was right.

You would stay at this distance.

You could watch safely without culpability.

Even the chance of getting yelled at was something you preferred to avoid.

“Yeah…” You forced it to the ground. “Y-you were s-saying s-something about… um…? Oh! You were upset about the stands closing at different times?”

“Yes.” He waited beside you. “If they’re a coordinated effort then…”

He immediately tapered off.

His silence weighed heavily so you looked up to see what had stopped him.

Instead of elsewhere, his gaze was keenly trained on you.

“What is it?” His head tilted.

You stuttered your confusion.

“Why did you give up just now?” He appeared to loom.

You shrank. “G-give up?”

“Jalebi!” He gestured behind him. “You couldn’t look away. You clearly wanted some, so what changed your mind? Is it because I lacked interest? Are you simply full? Was it the spectacle?”

His attitude change seemed harsh and you flinched further.

He held his stance.

The weight of his gaze became suffocating. “D-Donnie, I-”

“Be honest.” It was a plea.

It was unlike his body language.

It pulled your eye.

This time you tried to examine him without pretense.

Where you’d read anger, you now read frustration.

His drawn brows said it was less with you and more about what he didn’t understand.

He’d been so good to you this evening.

He’d been watching.

The thought repeated and you stepped a little closer to him.

The sharpness of his eye softened, but he continued to beg you for information.

He’d been trying harder than you even noticed to be supportive.

Now that he was faced with a situation where he didn’t know the best course, he’d piped right up with his honesty.

You moved close enough and lightly touched his arm. “I-I’m worried s-since it’s illegal…”

He chuffed into a smile. “You’ve kept the wrong company.”

You blinked up at his insinuation.

“I am very often on the supposedly incorrect side of the law.” He explained with a cock of his brow that said you should very well know that.

You looked down and remembered clearly how he’d terrorized you.

He’d also been building a rocket.

Among a dozen other little borderline nefarious notes you’d heard.

You tapped him once to illustrate you recalled and a second time to give yourself a moment before you looked at him anew.

“I… d-don’t want to get yelled at.” You tried again.

“You won’t.” His face was set in determination and you thought you should always clarify your responses from now on. “How about this? I’ll keep watch and you get yourself one of whatever that is.”

“M-me-!?” You squeaked out until the rest of your horror at having to order something alone took your tongue.

He seemed ready for it. “What are you worried about? You’ve already made one independent purchase tonight.”

For a moment, you didn’t know what he was talking about.

Then it struck you that you’d been the one to order at that last stall.

You hadn’t even noticed.

You’d been distracted.

You’d been out of your head.

He watched on with a half cocked grin as you came to all those realizations.

You resisted sinking into him and offset the feeling by leaning close. “W-was it a t-trick?”

“No.” He reached up and lightly traced your arm. “It was all you.”

“You…” You fought a million more worries and thought of the strength you could siphon from him. “… don’t want any?”

“I don’t know what it is. I’ll reserve the right to taste if that changes your order. You will surprise me with your decision upon you return successful.” He had a levity to his voice.

He made it a game.

He gave you a challenge.

One that was achievable and had a clear reward.

You turned up watery eyes to him and gave a sharp nod.

He stepped out of your way.

You marched straight toward the stand and held your anxiety by the throat. You weren’t going to let a drop of your resolve slip away and you entered the line. You added one caveat to the contest; you weren’t going to make it harder and instead, you were going to sweeten the pot. You decided you weren’t going to look at Donnie until you had your treat.

The line stepped forward.

You followed suit.

He was there.

He was watching.

He was your safety net.

You would see him the moment you were successful.

You could do this on your own.

You didn’t need an obvious guiding light.

It was always hanging there above.

Supposedly cold, but in actuality made of overflowing warmth.

Another step and you were next in line.

The men running the stand laughed between themselves.

You had a sense that they were putting on a display to make the most of their time.

You decided the laws regarding food carts in this city were silly.

Everyone was just doing their best to make it.

It was your turn.

You ordered two with a punctuated peace sign and the man taking your order beamed you a smile for it. He passed something off to the other guy glazing the dough and you watched as there was a flourish of sugar crystals. You were then passed a folded wad of paper with two sticky treats folded inside. Translating your thanks first with your gaze then your wallet, you turned and felt invincible as you headed toward Donnie.

He had a casual lean to his stance and offered you a slow clap as you approached.

“I did it.” You spoke highly.

“You did.” He agreed with a similar sweetness to what was in your hand. “Now tell me what jalebi is.”

You chuckled and unfurled your pack to walk and talk. You told him what you knew and the travel videos you watched. You admitted your guilty pleasure of having them on in the background along with cooking videos. Donnie related that to you getting along with Mikey and you dispelled the notion. Sharing with him your concerns of inadequacy, you took your first bite and had to stop. It was an intense burst of flavor. Pricked with happy tears, you took a few more bites and skipped to catch up to Donnie.

He almost timidly asked about his portion. You split the two you had and fumbled an apology as you gave him one. He took it by steadying your hand and you felt heated when he pulled away. You buried your flush into fried dough and he probed you about what other street foods you wanted to try. It became a steady back and forth that morphed as you walked. You felt like you had gone a great distance as your current topic of discussion was what TV universe you were each best suited to survive in.

“Ah, to fight alongside Atomic Lass…” Donnie mooned.

You drank in his cuteness like a fine wine.

“Oh.” He said suddenly and stopped.

You missed the cue and made it a few more steps before turning back. “What?”

“We’re here.” He was looking up at your apartment.

“O-oh…” You hadn’t noticed.

His pupil darted for a moment before he swept it up to you. “I have become a big enough mutant to admit when I am wrong: I was wrong about dumplings. They are truly a wide spanning dish that is worthy of a dedicated market.”

You smiled and shifted side to side in an obvious way that you were eating up his admittance.

“Yes, yes.” He let you have it with an eye roll. “Thank you.”

You shook your head. “Thank you. I couldn’t have done this without you.”

“Yes.” He stepped closer. “You could have.”

Hug.

You were overcome with the desire to hug him.

You wanted your hug from earlier.

Was that alright?

You suddenly weren’t sure.

You wanted to wipe your hands.

You knew they weren’t sticky because you’d been careful, but you didn’t want to chance making him uncomfortable.

A handshake.

Was that a normal goodbye?

How did you sum up your gratitude?

“I’m proud of you.” He said.

Your heart could have exploded out of your chest and you would have been none the wiser.

“I hadn’t brought attention to each and every victory as that is not my style of learning, but I’d be remiss if I didn’t give you overall praise. You did wonderfully tonight and your progress is phenomenal. Good job.”

You reached for him at an aching pace.

You had to touch him.

You had to.

He met you with a flowing lift of his arms.

You used them as obvious leverage as your face drew close to his chest.

He moved in for the motion of a hug and his arms tucked behind you.

You ghosted up his limbs on a trek for his neck.

He dipped close ready to slot your bodies together.

You caught your hands behind his head, brushing his mask tails in the process, before you used your locked digits to pull him flush to you.

He came easily and trended toward the side to tuck his cheek beside yours.

You wove your head, interrupting his course, and gave him a single lashed look.

You perceived desire off him and you leaned in just shy of kissing into him.

His beak wrinkled with a squiggly grin and his lids swung shit as he closed the distance.

In a near instant shift, you deepened the lip lock.

You missed this.

Monumentally so.

His sweetness was enhanced by the treat on his tongue.

You needed more.

You weren’t going to waste a second.

You released your hands to instead coil your arms around his neck.

It bumped you apart where he tugged you back in a needy press.

Kissing once for each month since your last, you were forced to part only because you required oxygen.

Don’t apologize. “I couldn’t help it…”

“Good.” He spoke heat.

You kissed one more time to grow on before he shifted his grip.

He hugged you tightly.

He squeezed until it was almost too much before he lifted you off the ground and joy brought him to spin you.

“Finally!” He raved.

You were both giggling as he set you back down and peppered you with an assault of kisses. “Donnie!”

“See me again. Planetarium. Let’s do your list.” He told you with a fire in his eye. “Together.”

How could you deny that? “And that restaurant?”

“Dinner and a show. That will be our proper date.”

“Because this…?” You flushed off to the side.

“I don’t care for retroactive naming.” He squeezed your attention back. “I’m looking forward. I’m asking you out now, right now.”

“I accept…” You told him.

“You accept.” He repeated to cement the words.

“Yes.” You kissed his cheek. “Yes!” He hoisted you up and you only made it back inside when the jeers from passersby became too embarrassing.

💛 NEXT 💛

I'm currently on vacation so maybe my poor overworked betas @tmntxthings and @thepinkpanther83 get a break too

#sunshinemoonshinefic #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt x reader #rottmnt donnie x reader #donatello hamato #donnie x reader #rise donnie #rise donnie x reader #rottmnt donatello #rottmnt Donnie #me #fanfiction #my fanfiction

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casscainmainly · 3 months ago

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hii, do you read fanfics? and if yes, do you have any fic recs for cass, either as a solo character or focused on her relationships with the rest of the batfam?

Hi!!! I'm not the most well-versed in fanfics, but I have read some great Cass ones. These are mostly going to be solo Cass focused, since I haven't found that many great ones with the Batfam.

Volving by @shobogan

This short fic kills me everytime. Set after the end of Batgirl (2000), it's honestly the conclusion I wish we'd gotten. The dialogue for Cass is on point, and I'm quite picky about Cass dialogue! I also recommend shobogan's equally amazing Equinox, which is a Brenda/Cass story.

Hot Girl Shit (The Feminine Urge To Die Young) by @havendance

An astonishingly clever fic that places Claire Clover (Gotham Girl) into the events of early Batgirl (2000). No knowledge of Claire is strictly needed though, the author makes it really easy to follow along. The parallels are unmatched, the feels are tremendous, it's just a great fic everyone should read. Also recommend havendance's Cassandra Cain vs. The World!, where Cass has to fight Kon's seven evil exes (it's as hilarious as it sounds).

Nourish by Ptelea

This fic is as sweet as its theme - Cass gets a moment with each of the Batfam, bonding over fruit. The writing is beautiful, and the Jason section in particular is stellar. The fluffiest fic on this list by far!

what's past is prologue by Icestorm238

Cass only appears in the sixth story in this series, but the entire thing is worth reading. A Dick-goes-back-in-time-to-save-Jason fic, the character twists and turns are so good, and there's an excellent Steph-centric story here too! Even if you don't care for the other characters, Cass is incredibly well-written in her section, a rarity for whole Batfam fics.

When Pinioned Birds Take Flight by @iowriteswords

This series (Robin and Other Flightless Birds) is well known, but this story is the most Cass-focused, and doesn't necessarily require knowledge of the prior fics. Though this is an AU, Cass is anchored in canon, and her relationship to Babs in particular gets a lot of development in the last part of the fic.

Not as Cass-centric as any of these, but bad signal by prismatical is an excellent story with some great Cass moments. The fic is definitely more focused on Dick, Jay, and Tim, but Cass isn't just a prop here and is actively involved, so I'd still check it out!

I wish I had more recs, I know there's some great Cass stuff out there I haven't found yet. Thanks for the ask, hopefully other people can chime in with their own recommendations!

#cassandra cain #batgirl #fic recs #the fact that the cass cain-centric tag only has 197 works is criminal #tried to tag those with tumblr accounts but i wasn't sure about some of them #anyway no more cardboard cutout cass 2k24 #sick of batfam fics where cass is there to just read someone's body language and disappear #honestly rather they not include cass at all than tag her and do nothing with her #duke fans i feel your pain

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kinniemikey · 2 months ago

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Sunsets Duo's overlooked relationship

Analysis for Mikey's and Raphael's relationship.

Let's start this off with something easy, people tend to ignore Mikey's and Raphael's dynamic or brush it off as Mikey disliking Raphael.

Which is just plain wrong, they have reasons for why they act the way they do.

It's a bit easier to tell, why Mikey dislikes Raphael protectiveness solely for the 'Hot Soup: The Game' and or 'Men vs. Sewer' episode but people are way too fixated on that and ignore every other episode to see, where Raphael is coming from.

Just look at Mikey anytime, he's by himself without his brothers, there is definitely a pattern going on.

This fight or flight instinct kicks in, anytime something doesn't go as planned. He freezes on spot and it takes him a very long time to run away as a last result.

(Todd literally had to carry Mikey away from Meatsweats after Meatswats was about to punch them in this tree like monster form and another time Leo had to pull Mikey away from the robo ghost)

This is all linked to Mikey overthinking situations.

Mikey needs to be told, what to do.

This is something he learned from Raphael and Donnie, the training session with Raphael made him a strong fighter no doubt and Donnie's advice is just as helpful for Mikey in certain situations but this is also why Mikey is very reliant on others, specifically Raphael and Donnie.

He never learned how to do his own thing in missions without his brothers. He always just listens and you can see this very strongly in 'Repo Mantis' episode with Donnie.

Like yes he still does impulsive stuff due to his ADD but regarding the mission, he mainly was listening.

This is also an episode in which Mikey pleads for Donnie to not call Raphael and Leo for help.

Everytime he gets to shine by himself through battles, he can do just fine but anytime he overthinks something, he usually tend to mimic his brothers fighting style and of course loses that way.

It's not helping that usually his ideas were never taken into considerations. They were usually brushed off by Raphael and or Donnie as nonsense or something to immediately correct, which amplifies Mikey's anxiety to do something wrong on his own without his brothers being there to tell him what to do.

They may have good intentions but those good intentions are also hindering Mikey's growth.

It's why his first solo mission was an entirely new experience for Mikey. He wanted to do things his own way and proof Raphael that he can be trusted.

It's why he got serious after he got the call from Raphael and managed to fend off Cassandra pretty well.

Now with this in mind, we also got some canon confirmation regarding Raphael.

Raphael possess emotional intelligence.

Which means, Raphael completely understands Mikey's fears but has no clue, it's him being a cause of this.

(Donnie understands Mikey's needs as well but in a different way and luckily isn't protective to the extreme as Raphael)

This is why Raphael gets very protective over Mikey the most. He worries about him way too much and in turn Mikey is starting to get irritated by this.

He even gets passive aggressive, especially in this scene below.

It's also not helping that Mikey is pretty sensitive as a whole and all of his brothers know.

Mikey is the most expressive in the family when it comes to his sad or scared emotions and doesn't shy away from showing this, not even to strangers.

The fact that Mikey always seems to be on Raphael's back is very notable as well, which means Raphael is Mikey's safe space and Raphael is fully aware of this fact.

Those are points as to why Raphael is overprotective to Mikey, he doesn't do this for no reason.

Now the question is, why does Raphael not consider Mikey's ideas in missions and why does Raphael struggle to trust Mikey, if he is emotional intelligent as the creator says?

It's pure stress, Raphael is very stressed in a lot of episodes, he can't always keep track on everyone's emotional side.

He is just a minor that happens to take care of his younger brothers, we also can't forget that he is just 1 year older than Donnie and Leo, the way Raphael reacts, it's pretty realistic honestly.

If everything is quiet and nothing stresses him out, he's right there to comfort Mikey, if needed.

Now to the trust question, I will elaborate.

People usually pick the 'Mrs. Cuddles' card to show that Mikey apparently hates Raphael.

No this is quiet the opposite, sounds weird but the reason why Mikey acted uncharacteristically mean towards Raphael, is purely because he can't grasp the idea that Raphael, a big guy, who is the strongest and most reliable person, would be afraid of an insignificant plush like Mrs Cuddles.

They joked about it because it's funny for them but then Mikey gets irritated that the person who always have answers just doesn't have it and is shows to be scared...of a plush of all things.

I mean in the very same episode, Mikey screams his lungs out because he hopes that Raphael will go safe him, despite being with Leo.

Now you can perhaps see, why Raphael was worried sick for Mikey in the 'Hot Soup: The Game' episode and struggles to trust Mikey to do things on his own.

Both Raphael and Mikey are unintentionally hurting each other, Raphael doesn't mind to take care of Mikey but sometimes it's just too much and he needs a break. Whereas Mikey needs to have a voice in certain missions, figure himself out and not rely heavily on Raphael to do all the lifting.

The latest episodes and season was showing us growth for both Raphael and Mikey that seemingly went unnoticed 'One Man's Junk' is the ultimate episode for that.

Mikey and Donnie already went once to this junkyard at the ‘Repo Mantis’ episode and did fine, it’s why Donnie and Mikey wanted to get to Repo because they knew how this guy ticks.

But Raphael didn't listen to Mikey and wanted to go with his plan instead, he had no idea that Mikey and Donnie prior went on an adventure with Repo as their opponent.

As before, Mikey was able to tell that this isn't his fault, he almost finished the mission in ease with Donnie just like he almost finished his first solo mission.

Raphael is the one who kind of ruined Mikey's progress, even if his actions were intended to be good.

I think right this moment Raphael realizes this, after Mikey communicated this to him.

In the end, he decides to go with Mikey's plan, it may sound silly but at the same time it sounds like this is going to work, which it did.

This is where the relationship of the two, slowly started to get mended.

How communication can solve issues like this!

Moving on from S1, let’s talk about S2 with another sorta Mikey and Raphael episode with Draxum included in 'Reparin' the Baron'. Now since Mikey's confidence is geared up by a lot after Raphael has shown to trust his plans and by default trust him, he wants to help Draxum in his own terms, which confuses Raphael because he can't for his own sanity understand why. He isn't necessarily listening to Mikey but for good reasons, Draxum was their enemy the entire run time in this series, Raphael jumped to the conclusion that Mikey is putting himself in danger without any plans or idea on what he is doing.

But seeing that all of the Hamato family joined this apartment of Draxum, it's a bit clearer to Raphael that Mikey didn't do this with nothing planned ahead, no.

Mikey wants everyone to see that Draxum is part of their family and should be treated as such. He wants to convince everyone, including Draxum that he is part of their family.

So Mikey chose Raphael to come join him with Draxum.

This episode as a whole shows us how much Mikey and Raphael have grown to understand each other much better. Mikey is not afraid anymore to pursue Raphael into his plan because he knows Raphael will get worried the most out of everyone and wants to show him that he can take care of things on his own.

Raphael on the other hand didn't downright tell Mikey that this is stupid or dismisses Mikey altogether after being calmed down enough, he softly asks Mikey if this is really a good idea and doubts Mikey's word that it will work out but still he goes along with Mikey's idea.

Everything was fine, until the bounty hunters found them. Mikey is the first one to step up, ready to defend Draxum and Raphael readied himself to help Mikey, if things goes south but instead Draxum ran off and left Mikey to fend himself, meanwhile Raphael got upset at Draxum for leaving Mikey behind.

Mikey still wants to help Draxum but obviously Raphael doesn't want to anymore, not after the stunt Draxum has pulled on Mikey.

This is where he takes the time to listen to Mikey again and Mikey’s reasoning was still the same. 'He made us, he is family'. Raphael's realization was creeping up on him that Mikey let something this awful slide because he sees Draxum as family.

Sometimes I get a feeling that this face Raphael is making, is pure shock and a bit of guilt right here.

He doesn't want to abandon Mikey's feelings, the same way Draxum abandoned Mikey. He reluctantly agrees to help, not for Draxum but for Mikey's sake.

Now this is more of a theory but still possibly part of this analysis.

A lot of fans think that the fall out between Mikey and Raphael started, when they were very young.

I for one thing that either S2 or S3 was going to be this fall out episode between Mikey and Raphael, it would have happened not because Mikey goes on a streak of doing more by himself and not relying as much on Raphael as time goes by.

Knowing Raphael lost his leader role to Leo and the way how Raphael treated Mikey for a long time, makes him question if he really was a good leader to begin with and I think Raphael would ultimately believe that Mikey never needed him in the first place.

Which is just plain wrong because Mikey still needs Raphael, even if he acts more independent.

#rottmnt #rise of the turtles #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise of the tmnt #sunset duo #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt raph #rise raph #rise mikey

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lokisprettygirl · 1 year ago

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Close Ties (Daemon Targaryen x Female Reader) (Modern AU) (Non canon) (18+)

Read Chapter 8 // Series Masterlist

Chapter 9

Summary : Trip to Japan with Uncle Daemon doesn't go as planned but that could be a blessing in disguise.

Warning: 18+, dad's best friend trope, canon (we don't know her..don't like don't read), feeling of hopelessness, slight uncle kink if you squint, familial uncle niece sort of relationship but he's not really her uncle, there will be more smut later, significant age gap but reader is in her mid twenties, mention of infidelity, divorce, smoking and alcohol drinking, physical violence implied

You were in your room at your parent's house packing for your trip to Japan, sure you had a place of your own but since you frequented here often you made sure to keep the majority of your belongings here as well, besides you had your flight with Daemon in three hours and didn't have much time to spare.

“Lingerie ..yup ..keep the lingeries..he may not touch you yet but he sure can look”

Daemon had told you to go see him in his room before heading downstairs. Was he going to kiss you? You had no idea, he was such a tease and very unpredictable.

You were excited to go see him when out of nowhere Cassandra came rushing into your room..

“Babee auntie just told me you're leaving for Japan”

You heard her voice so you gave her a fake smile, like a coward you still had not confronted her, but it's been two weeks since you had seen her last so that was good progress right?

“Yeah it's a work thingy with ummm Uncle Daemon” you told her so she smiled,

“Mmm how's your Uncle daemon doing anyway?” you gulped as she questioned you, if she knew what was going on with you and him she'd lose her mind completely. It was weird because she probably would have been the first person you would have gone to if things were normal between you two or if she hadn't slept with Daemon or gone on secret vacations with your ex..

“He's alright..” you mumbled so she sighed.

“How long is this trip for?”

“4-5 days?” You told her so she looked at you with a full smile.

“Good I'll have to pack accordingly” she jumped up and down as if it was a pleasant surprise for you that she wanted to join you.

“What do you mean?” You asked her as you crossed your arms in nervousness,

“Aren't you excited..we are going to have so much fun babe..i have never been to Japan” she giggled but it didn't amuse you at all.

“Cass I'm not going there for fun, it's a work trip and I'm pretty sure I'll have to be with Daemon to all the meetings, that's the whole point of this trip” her smile faltered as you said that,

“Did you just call him Daemon?” She asked you as she crossed her arms like a petulant child so you sighed again.

“Sir..Daemon.. whatever..he's my boss as well now Cass and things have been weird since you two had that fling ..I don't want weirdness on this trip..i need to focus on work”

And on your relationship with him. You needed privacy.

“Wow are you really not taking me with you now that you have a big girl's job? God you have changed” She said to you, she seemed genuinely upset and offended.

As she turned around to storm out of your room you called her once or twice but you didn't make much effort, a part of you did feel guilty but you shoved it aside. You really thought she'd just leave but she went downstairs instead and it must have been your misfortune that your father was home for once. After a few minutes your dad called you and told you that you didn't have to worry about the trip, her ticket was taken care of and that you could take Cassandra with you, and he would make sure all of you have a good time there and not just drown yourselves in work.

Gee thanks dad. Daemon was going to be pissed for sure.

When you didn't go see him like he had told you, Daemon went to your room first but it was all empty so he went downstairs and he saw Cassandra giving him a sly smile, there was luggage right next to her.

He glared at you and you were avoiding his gaze, probably due to embarrassment.

“Mate forget about the past and you both should move on, we are like family and that's how it should be..take this trip as an opportunity to resolve your differences” your dad said to him as he pointed towards Cassandra, she was exceptionally giddy ofcourse, she got her way like always.

Jackson was going to drive the three of you to the airport, there was an awkward silence in the car, you could see him looking at you through the rear view mirror and then you heard your phone ping,

He didn't respond to you after that, he wasn't even looking at you or talking to you, he was upset and rightly so.

As you all took your seats in the plane she swapped her seat with you because she wanted to “apologize to daemon and make things normal” but you knew it was just another excuse to stay close to him.

She wasn't even acknowledging that she had gone against your wishes and joined this trip despite your clear resistance.

You had to sit on the right side of the business class row while they were on the left, it was going to be a very long, very lonely and very tense flight for you..you wanted to spend these 12 hours just talking to him but that won't happen now.

After a few hours as Cassandra went to the bathroom you quickly got up from your seat and sat down next to him. He had his airpods in, his sunglasses down, and he appeared to be lost in thought. You gently tapped him on the shoulder and he looked up, visibly annoyed at first, thinking it was Cassandra who had woken him up. As he spotted you, his expression softened, but he still seemed unhappy about the whole situation.

“I know you're cross with me.. extremely cross”

He sighed as you said that,

“I told you to confront her, i have said it a million times in the past month” his voice was firm and strict like a school teacher,

“I know i should have –”

“Yeah you should have..she wouldn't be here right now if you had done so”

Your eyes teared up as he said that, you didn't like making him upset.

“I'm sorry..it's just not easy..we have been friends for years” you mumbled meekly and he was about to turn to you to comfort you but Cassandra returned so you quickly got up and went back to your seat.

His anger was misdirected he knew, he was pissed at Cassandra but as he didn't want to pay any attention to her he didn't even let his anger out on her because it didn't really matter to her what sort of attention she was receiving..

He knew he had to comfort you soon because he understood your plight. He stayed in a broken relationship for more than a decade, he understood how hard it was to let go of things you wanted to keep forever. You had always struggled to make genuine friends, so you had put a lot of effort into building a relationship with Cassandra but he could tell what kind of a person she was. She just wanted to use you.

He also wanted to discuss the work presentation with you so he asked Cassandra to swap seats with you which she did after rolling her eyes and whining for a minute.

“Daemon–” he interrupted you as you took his name because he could feel Cassandra's eyes on you and she was eavesdropping as well.

“Let's just focus on work alright…it's a work trip” he said to you so you swallowed the rest of your words, this wasn't going well, your relationship had just started like last night and this wasn't supposed to happen this way.

However as you helped him with the presentation you felt the tension melting slightly, he seemed in a better mood as he was smiling often and he was trying to cheer you up as well.

“Are you guys done ..like ..this seat is a bit uncomfortable not gonna lie” Cassandra threw her words in the air so Daemon glared at her,

“Then jump off the bloody plane” your eyes widened as he said that to her and she just scoffed in response. Now that had managed to bring a huge smile to your face.

As you all finally reached Tokyo and made your way to your respective rooms you couldn't help but stress about Cassandra, when you were at dinner together there was a pin drop silence between you three and it was the weirdest and most uncomfortable situation.

When you returned to your room you quickly showered and changed into a night dress. As you heard your phone vibrate at first you thought it must be Daemon but it was Cassandra instead. She wanted you to go visit a local nightclub with her that she had read rave reviews about. Did she realize that you were there for work and had a meeting in the morning?

You didn't respond but texted Daemon instead because you wanted to see him and clear the tension between you both however you didn't receive a response for a good fifteen minutes and you couldn't wait even a second longer so you put on a robe and stepped out of your room.

All three of you had rooms right next to each so you had to pass by Cassandra's room to reach Daemon's.

You knocked on his door and he opened soon after, he still had the laptop on his arm and he was on a call so he stepped aside and gestured for you to get in. You sat down on his bed so he smiled as he looked at you even though he was still deeply engrossed in that call.

“Hai! Yoroshiku onegaishimasu Mr Hayashi…Oyasumi” you crossed your arms as he spoke something in Japanese, as he hung up he took the airpods out and walked towards his desk to put his laptop down.

“You speak Japanese?” You asked him so he chuckled.

“Of Course not..i Googled it right before the call”

You smiled as he said that and reached closer to you.

“I texted you and you ignored me” he smiled and leaned down to kiss your forehead, sure he was upset with Cassandra's lack of boundaries and manners but he wasn't going to ruin this trip or hurt you because of that.

“I was working sweetheart”

“Mmm you're upset i know”

“I'm not upset ..i worry”

“She won't trouble you, you just have to ignore her” he sighed as you said that and sat down next to you.

“It's not me that I worry about”

“I tried to make her not come with us, i really did” your eyes teared up so he pulled you closer to him and hugged you, he hadn't done that since he had seen you last in his cabin which to be Frank was barely 24 hours ago.

“I know but did you try to confront her about the doubts you had regarding Dylan?”

“No” you shook your head and he placed his forehead down on yours,

“You know you need to do that, she's not a good friend you must know that now don't you?” he asked you softly and you nodded in response, you knew everything but you had a hard time accepting it..

“It's just..I don't have many friends..I have lost friends before but at least i knew that they just wanted to get close to me because of my dad..with Cassandra I just..what does she want?” your voice was laced with a mix of sadness and frustration as you spoke.

“Same thing but even worse i fear, first of all she's so annoying I don't know how you tolerate her”

“Well the same way you were able to tolerate her while you were fucking her”

There was a silence before you felt his fingers clutching around your hair and he pulled on it slightly. You had trouble breathing as soon as he kissed the corner of your mouth and trailed his lips down your chin,

“What have I said about swearing?”

“Mmm that i should do it more often?” he smiled as you said that.

Lord he found you absolutely adorable when you got all sassy with him.

“Your mouth is going to bring you trouble sweetheart, I'm asking again so this time think carefully before you speak”

Oh god. A part of you really wanted to defy him again just to see what he'd do to you but then your need to be his good girl weighted heavier.

“Mm that it doesn't suit me?”

“Mmm that being said, i fucked her because I was a lonely single man and she was available and quite eager to throw herself at me, her personality isn't what attracted me to her, but you can't say the same now can you?”

He caressed your scalp before he kissed your cheek, he could tell you were thinking about what he had said.

“She wasn't always like this..or maybe I just ..maybe I like to live in denial” your voice sounded defeated and he absolutely abhorred seeing you in this situation.

“I don't want you to lose a friend..but i need you to be careful before letting a person into your life like this. She has been going on free trips with you since she met you, she's using your name and your dad's wealth to get what she wants from you ..but that's not enough for her and you know that” Daemon's voice was filled with concern and your eyes teared up again as you knew he was looking out for you.

He might have just become your boyfriend of sorts like two days ago but he has always been someone who had your best interests at heart, you knew he'd never give you bad advice.

“In college ..during our last year, there was this guy Seth..he ummm..I liked him and i thought he did too because he used to look at me when I wasn't looking at him and he'd try to talk to me at times ..but on New years bunch of us went to New York City together and they kissed there as the ball dropped, I never confronted her because she didn't know that i liked him” he kissed your forehead softly as your innocent words clenched his heart. She always had her eyes on whatever you wanted.

“Or perhaps she did, ever thought about that?”

“Now am I'm thinking about that and..I just thought she had changed with time..it's hard to accept that maybe she has always been this way and I was so dumb that i couldn't see her real self” he cupped your cheeks as you said that. There's no way he'd ever want you to feel bad about keeping your heart kind and open for others..

“You're not dumb ..no my sweetheart, not at all, you're my sweetest pixie.. a bit naive yes but you'll learn and grow from such errors in judgement” he mumbled softly so you smiled as you hugged him before you climbed on his lap.

He quickly wrapped his arms around your waist and rocked you back n forth gently to comfort you.

“Besides.. every time you feel dumb, just remember that i spent eleven years with a woman that couldn't stop cheating on our marriage”

You pulled away and cupped his cheeks as he said that.

“Well you learned too Mister, now you have me and I'd never ever put you through that pain” a smile crept on his lips at your sweet words.

“Me neither, you for me ..as long as you want me”

“Mmmm as long as I want?” you spoke in a childish voice and it made his smile even wider.

“I got 30 years max..not making it past 70 so yeah it's as long as you want”

“Don't say that..”

“Mmmhm what are you gonna do about it?" His tone was challenging,

“I might kiss you”

“Ooohh is that a threat?” he let out a playful gasp,

“I am threatening you”

He laid down on the bed with you still on top of him and then he flipped you under him. He kissed your forehead and then kissed the tip of your nose, grabbing his chin between his thumb and forefinger he made you look at him. Not that you had your eyes off him.

“I have thought about this so many times” you mumbled as you caressed his chin with your fingertips.

“Mmm so have i..but only in the last four months”

“I know..you don't have to justify yourself to me of all people” he sighed and nodded as you said that.

“It's just strange at times. We have photos of us together when you were just a kid, on several occasions i had my arms around your shoulders or was hugging you, things can be misconstrued. I always feel like i should watch my words when I speak”

“Not with me”

You felt that he was finally going to kiss you but then you both heard a knock on the door and you quickly got up as you had a feeling it was Cassandra. Of course it was.

“What do I do?” You asked him so he chuckled,

“Hide in the closet? I'd suggest we pretend to work but I don't trust her to not fabricate things and snitch on us to your parents”

Could she really do that you wondered?

“Okay hiding in the closet it is then”

He had left the door of the closet slightly open, lights were dimmed in the room so she won't be able to see you anyways he figured. You stood inside with bated breaths as you heard his footsteps fade away from you.

“Have you seen y/n? She's not answering the door or her calls” she asked him as she entered the room on her own accord even though he hadn't invited her in.

“Look Cassandra..you nobhead.. I'm busy so just fuck off yess?”

He glared at her so she smiled. She was just shameless like that.

“Awn i thought you'd be more worried about her, isn't she like your niece?” her voice was so shrill it really pierced his ears in the worst possible manner.

“I reckon she's in her room”

“Mmmm or she's out with a bloke or something, it's not that she hasn't done it before” she sighed as she sat down on his bed.

Now you had a clear view of her from the closet that he had left ajar, your phone was on his bedside table and he was just hoping it won't start ringing , also what she had just said about you had pissed him off more, he knew you weren't the type to do something so careless even if you both weren't in this new relationship.

“uhhhuh that seems like something you'd do”

He clapped back at her so she smiled again. She wasn't done just yet.

“You know you have no idea how careless she can be with men in these new places..i mean i get the appeal of course but safety is important don't you think? She can't even defend herself in such situations as I have had to do so for her countless times before. I just worry too much, I think that's why she has been avoiding me lately” she made a sad face but he wasn't falling for that, he hoped you had heard the way she was talking about you behind your back, if she said all that your supposed uncle he couldn't imagine how she has been portraying you in front of strangers.

“She has really changed since she met Rhaenyra” his brows furrowed as she said that. He knew you had befriended Rhae since your birthday party.

“My niece?”

“Mhhm she's definitely a bad influence on y/n”

“Rhaenyra is a decent girl and so is y/n”

“Mmmmhm really because I saw your niece in a club a few days ago giggling in the arms of a man who seemed much older than her, i couldn't help but wonder where I had seen him before and then i realized I met him at your birthday party” he turned to look at her as she said that, sure he didn't want to believe a single word that came out of her attention seeking whore mouth but his protectiveness towards his actual niece weighed in. Rhaneyra was the same age as you so he knew she could make her own decisions like you but he was still worried.

“What man?” He asked her so she smiled,

“Mmm, your brother's business partner? I don't remember his name to be honest as I don't really care about her” she shrugged and she had that infuriating smile on her face so he smiled at her finally

“Well perhaps you'd have remembered his name if you had fucked him”

She glared at him as he said that she had been trying so hard to make him see her differently but she didn't know why he was so unaffected by her, usually guys often caved in eventually.

“Now fuck off i have a meeting tomorrow” he grabbed her arm and walked her towards the door, when he reached he shoved her out with a little force, he then watched her huff and make her way to the elevator instead of going to your room to check on you again. She was so deeply worried about you but didn't want to see if you were alright or not?

As you heard the door closing you stepped out of the closet and he immediately noticed that there was a dejected look on your face, not only has she bitched about you behind your back but had also tried to malign Rhaenyra's image in front of her uncle.

You snapped out of your thoughts as you felt him wrap his arms around you and you immediately pressed your chest against his broad comfy chest, he truly was your safe haven. Now that he had returned you couldn't imagine going years without never hearing from again.

As you looked up eventually he cupped your cheeks and kissed your forehead before he kissed your cheek.

“You alright?” He asked you so you nodded,

“Now i know what I have to do with her, maybe this was the push i needed”

“Good girl” your face flushed as his soft voice infiltrated your senses but there was a look of confusion on his face “Do you know anything about Rhaenyra and Harwin?” He asked as he stepped a little away from you, making you gulp in nervousness, his hand combed through his hair.

“You know you can't believe anything she says” you chuckled but he could see right through you.

"I find it unusually precise for her to invent such a story. She's not particularly astute. And you, my love?" He paused for a moment, gazing at you intently, before resuming, "Don't even consider attempting to deceive me like that." You let out a small sound of frustration before letting out a long breath, weighing his words carefully.

“Daemon she's a big girl, I'm sure she knows what she's doing..you can't go all uncle on her.. it would make you seem like a hypocrite” he scowled as you said that.

“It's not hypocrisy to look out for your loved ones”

“I know..but it's not a mindless affair …she's in love with him” you mumbled hurriedly and his eyes widened.

“I don't even know what sort of bloke he is.. didn't even get to talk to him at the party..isn't he like forty?”

Instead of answering you just tilted your head at the irony of the situation. “Oh pipe it down love..not every older man has good intentions.. consensus would say that majority of them are just predators..just sharks waiting to pounce on younger flesh” you walked closer to him as he said that and wrapped your arms around him, he was kind of cute with his feathers all ruffled.

“Mmm so you have good intentions for me hmm?”

“Of Course I do”

“I know mister, just calm down okay, besides if you want to know him better you just have to reach out to her, she has missed her uncle as well in these years, in a pure innocent way ofcourse unlike me” he chuckled as you said that, you caressed his cheek with your thumb and it made him smile, you weren't wrong though, you always had something wise to say to him.

“We all loved you so much even as kids, you had no idea how comforting it was to have you around me especially during festivals and vacations, you didn't alienate me like other adults, you spent time with me and made me laugh with your funny jokes…and I'm sure you did the same with Rhaneyra and Aemond when you were with your family..they'd love to have their old uncle back”

His eyes were teary by the time you were done speaking so you cupped his cheeks and curled your arms around him.

The decision to leave his family and you wasn't a well thought one, he left on an impulse, he was angry and raged, nothing else made sense to him at the time, he just knew he couldn't have stayed here.

However the way your relationship with him has changed so drastically now, for once he didn't regret leaving because watching you grow up into this fine young woman and then developing an attraction towards you later in life would have been way worse than what it was now and he probably never would have acted on it if that was the case so maybe everything happened the way they did for a reason.. that's to say he hadn't forgotten why he had to leave. He'd never forget.

“Do I get to cuddle you tonight?” You asked him so he shook his head,

“That won't be a wise course of action if we are trying to take the slow approach”

“Ummm hello? You are”

“Well you deserve that sweetheart”

You grinned from ear to ear as he said that. Yeah you deserved to be treated tenderly and with utmost care, he'd never do anything that would ruin the bond he shared with you, even if you both part ways someday in romantic sense he hoped that you'd still think of him fondly.

Next day you watched him at the meeting and your mind was blown, you were trying to focus on the work but you couldn't just turn off that part of your brain that made you tick and so devastatingly aroused for him, he was confident and fierce, he knew how to manipulate and get those people to like him, and he was so charming. He was a businessman through and through.

And he was a great mentor to you, you were actually going to learn plenty from him if you wanted to stay in the family business, no wonder your father trusted him to teach you the tricks of the business , everything seemed fine between them now but you often thought about him fleeing the country once and you still didn't know the reason for that.

As you reached the hotel again, you found Cassandra in the lobby and she walked towards you. Daemon then looked at you and he gave you a knowing look. It was now or never for you, she'd continue to remain toxic if you don't confront her just now.

As you neared her you were going to say something but she opened her mouth first.

“I have a confession to make, i slept with Dylan”

👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

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#daemon targaryen #daemon targaryen x female reader #daemon targaryen x reader fluff #daemon targaryen x reader angst #daemon targaryen x reader smut #age gap relationship #non canon au #modern day au #modern daemon targaryen

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thedeviltohisangel · 8 months ago

Note

Blurb idea of Cass bringing John a gift back after her overseas trip?

All The Things I Did (Interlude): All I Brought Back With Me

CHAPTER 1 CHAPTER 2 INTERLUDE 1 CHAPTER 3

INTERLUDE 2 INTERLUDE 3 interlude 4

a/n: this got a little out of hand. cass and john have a mind of their own. i took the prompt in a bit of an evil direction but am i sorry? you be the judge. interlude ideas still open/come scream thoughts and questions at me. esp curious if you guys think cass should visit more? what does she do when she notices bucky's decline? does seeing her help or hurt? interested in your thoughts. love you all, enjoy !

When she landed at Thorpe Abbotts, her trip to rescue John failed, Colonel Harding was waiting for her on the runway. He looked like her father did when he caught her sneaking back into the house after night swimming with friends back in South Carolina. Hands on his hips and jaw twitching.

“You look like hell, Lieutenant.” Cass had spent the flight back biting her lip so hard it drew blood in an attempt to keep it from trembling. The tears had fallen silently but she was doing her best to keep them at bay. She couldn’t waste time crying over the current situation. Emotion would distract her from the task at hand. Prevent her from focusing the way she would need to do to break him out of the camp. She wasn’t going to sleep until he was back with her and safe.

“That’s where I came from, Colonel.” Her ribs were hurting with each breath, the bottle of whiskey the pilots had given her not numbing the pain at all.

“We’ve got to get you in front of an interrogator.” Cass nodded. She knew the drill. Knew they would want to know about the layout of the camp, the susceptibility of the guards, the process of transferring pilots. “For what it’s worth, Cassandra, I’m sorry about Egan. He was one of our best.”

“Is. He is one of the best. He’s at that godforsaken camp and I’m going to get him out.” She grimaced and reached for her side.

“I think your supervisors at the OSS have an opinion on that. They’re waiting for you inside.” Fuck. Now she was screwed. They had kept out of her business the entire time she was in the field. Had sent her instructions by classified mail or cable and praised all of her reports. For them to show up in person, she must have pissed someone off all the way up the ladder.

“Well, Colonel, I guess this is goodbye.” Harding removed his aviators and looked at her with sadness behind his eyes. He reached out and tenderly touched the bruise on her cheek before his hand dropped back to his side. “Cassandra-”

“Colonel, you already declared your love for me once. Don’t do it again.” Every professional wall she had built would break. She turned before he could change his mind and take the risk and walked into the building where she was sure her career was going to end. In there was a table with a man in a suit sitting behind it, a thick file open in front of him. All the chairs for her to sit in had been removed and she would’ve taken a deep breath if she thought it wouldn’t have killed her.

“Lieutenant Cassandra Ann Egan. Ink barely dry on the marriage certificate before your husband goes down over Germany and you recklessly insert yourself behind enemy lines. I might add, also in defiance of orders from your local, cover consistent chain of command, in direct violation of your training. Any comment so far, agent?”

“No, sir.”

“You’re lucky you were successful in Berlin last month. If you weren’t the only officer to ever accomplish that operational objective, I’d be here to escort you back to the states in handcuffs.” Cass gulped but maintained eye contact as best she could. “Instead, I’m here to promote you.”

“Sir, that doesn’t seem-” She caught the new rank he threw her way as best she could with one hand.

“Captain, you’re being sent on mandatory R&R back to the states until DC decides where to place you. Understood?”

“Yes, sir. Do I get to choose my location for leave?”

“I presumed South Carolina-”

“Wisconsin. There’s some people I need to meet.” He looked at her pensively but nodded.

“Very well. Now, let’s get a doctor in here and start the interrogation, shall we?”

----

When Cass finally made it back to her room, breathing was easier and the moon was illuminating a giant trunk that was now at the foot of her bed. She froze in the doorway. It was John’s. And now it was hers. She kicked her shoes off and padded over to her desk, his large sheepskin resting over the back of the chair. It still smelled like him when she put it on and it shattered her last will to stay strong. She dropped to her knees and wrapped his jacket around herself tighter, the sheepskin catching her tears like she imagined John would himself if he were here.

“You were right, Johnny. We should have never left London.” It had been the happiest two days of her life. It had been normal. Just like she imagined falling in love with a boy might be. They had gone to dinner and danced and danced and danced until her feet hurt. He had kissed her and ran his hands down her body and whispered in her ear how he needed her. They had gone to bed and claimed each other over and over until she forgot where she was and how awful the world around them was. Until she forgot how dangerous it would be to tell him she loved him and said it anyways. Had married him the next morning because neither of them could shake the feeling something bad was going to happen. That they needed to be each other’s fully in this life to guarantee they would find each other in the next.

Cass crawled over to the trunk and opened it shakily. There were the items she was expecting. Books, gum, cigarettes. A photo of his family back home and Yankees baseball cards. There was a pile of letters from home and then at the very bottom, an envelope with her name on it. And then she found another one and another one until there was a stack of letters he had written to her on the floor.

The first one dated the night she found the nerve to claim him in public. He wrote that he was going to tell her he loved her. That he couldn’t keep it in any longer so he wrote it down. That he knew she would be the one to get his trunk if anything happened to him because he had known she was it for him all along. She held that one close to her chest and felt the words seep into her skin and soothe the ache in her chest.

The rest of them followed similar themes of John pouring out emotions he was too afraid to say out loud. They all made her giggle because almost immediately after the letter was dated, he had said those words to her in person. He was never good at restraining himself when it came to her. The last one made her heart ache. It was the morning of the last mission, his handwriting rushed and sloppy. He poured out his love for her, how he was fighting for a future with her and hoped at least one of the men who owned the bullets she collected was down there today.

And as soon as I get back, we are going to celebrate our wedding and plan our trips to South Carolina and Wisconsin and practice our baby making. Cass smiled. The version of her that had met John that first night at the social club would have never guessed how broody he was. Now that she knew, it made her tingle. My sun. My moon. My stars. My wife. My precious Spook. I love you, Cass, and am eternally yours. She wiped the tears from her eyes and gently placed the letter back in its envelope. Sitting at her desk, her pen hovering over the blank paper, she looked up at the moon. Whenever her dad spent the nights camped with the farmhands in the field and Cass missed him, her mother would tell her to look at the moon and remember he was looking at the same one. John was looking at the same moon as her tonight. As she whispered her love into the moonlight and wrote the first of the daily letters she had promised him, she hoped the moon did her a favor and carried the message to Germany.

----

She spent the first day or two of her leave building up the courage to knock on the door of the Egan family. Her and John had discussed the eventuality of meeting his family. It felt odd to do it without him but she felt in her heart they deserved to know where he was and how he was doing. Selfishly, it was like getting a piece of him back.

After knocking on the door, she hoped for a moment it didn’t answer. Maybe this wasn’t going to make her or them feel any better. Maybe it would just break her heart all over again.

And then, the door opened.

----

A few weeks later she was pacing outside that wretched chain link fence. She had managed to make it without any broken ribs this time and she was thankful her contact hadn’t confiscated her canvas bag. In it were hats and gloves for John and Gale and the other men, enough chocolate to hopefully bring them some happiness and some mementos from Wisconsin his mother had sent with her. Cass wasn’t even sure how many of her letters had made it to him yet. If he even knew of the trip she had taken.

“There’s my beautiful, beautiful girl.” Her smile split her face, surging to meet his lips through a gap in the fence. “I’ve missed you.” Seeing her soothed the ache within him only incrementally. There was still something endlessly aggravating about the fence in between them but John knew he was lucky to even be able to see her like this. Counted her as his chief blessing before he tried to find sleep at night.

“I’ve missed you too but your face looks better than the last time I saw you.” John scoffed.

“Worried I wasn’t handsome enough for you anymore?”

“Worried you weren’t going to take care of yourself more like it.”

“Buck’s got me covered.” He pressed as close to her as the fence would allow. “I’ve gotten a few of your letters. Wrote you one back.” She smiled at how sheepish he seemed. Nervous that maybe she hadn’t liked what he had written.

“It hasn’t made its way to me but I’m sure it's lovely if the letters to me in your trunk are any indication.”

“You found those?” he asked while rubbing the back of his neck.

“It was waiting for me when I got back from here the last time. You loved me a lot earlier than you said it, John Egan.”

“Loved you from the moment I saw you.” He smiled, he thinks he only smiled when he read her letters or the one time she had visited, took any opportunity to escape into their solar system that he was allowed. “Your last letter said you got in trouble at work.”

“Colonel Harding ratted me out for not obeying his orders.” John’s jaw clenched at the mention of the man. The man who had used his rank to take Cass to dinners and dances and promised her the life of a General’s wife if she wanted it. “But you’ll be happy to know after I got my ass thoroughly chewed, I got promoted.”

“Promoted?”

“You are now the lucky husband to one Captain Cassandra Ann Egan.” He whistled, heart stuttering at the reminder she was his wife, as she did a little twirl and took a bow.

“Congratulations, Captain. You certainly earned the hell out of it.”

“You’ll have to feign surprise when the letter telling you all of this gets to you.” John watched as her face fell and grew concerned. “You’ll also see some letters from me that are postmarked from Wisconsin.”

“Wisconsin?” Then realization settled on his face. “Cass, did you…did you…” He was struggling to formulate the question.

“Please don’t be upset with me,” she breathed desperately. “When they mandated stateside leave it just slipped out. It was selfish of me. I’m sorry. I should’ve just gone to South Carolina and left it alone.”

“I haven’t been to Manitowoc in years,” he spoke wistfully. Had wanted to go back with her on his arm when all this was over. “My sisters give you a hard time?”

“I brought some fabric from my last trip to Paris to butter them up.” John laughed. Only his Spook would be able to tame his two older sisters. “I spent most of the time promising you were okay. They thought you injured your head when I told them we’d been married, something about you not seeming like the type.”

“Just had to find the right girl.”

“Your mom misses you. A lot. Wanted me to give you this.” Cass reached into her bag and pulled out a slightly tarnished silver watch with a date engraved on the back.

“My dad’s watch.” It was hard to swallow around the lump in his throat. “His dad gave it to him on my parents' wedding day. That’s what the date on the back is. Told me when I got married, it would be mine.”

“I can get it cleaned and upgrade the engraving and bring it back if you’d like.” John coughed and shook the fog from his head.

“No. It’s perfect. We’ll get the engraving done together when I’m out of here.” He tucked the watch into his shirt pocket.

“She also gave me this. Was horrified I wasn’t already wearing it.” Cass handed him a small ring box and he knew it was his grandmother’s engagement ring before he even opened it. “I told her it would be wrong to put it on my own finger. One more thing for us to do when we get you out of here.”

“Yeah but you best keep it safe while we wait to get the chance.” He removed the cross from around his neck, slipping the small diamond ring onto it and passing through the fence. She took the chain but slid the cross charm off and handed it back to him with a look. “I’d rather use it to protect you.”

“It’s not up for debate.” He took it and slipped it onto the same chain as his pendant. “Here comes our friend. Catch.” Cass launched the canvas over the side of the fence, John gathering it with ease.

“Thanks, baby. I’m sure all the guys will be very grateful.”

“I’m not sure when I’ll be back. Moscow is my new station.” She had asked for London but was turned down. Told she had earned more of a challenge than London presented. “I have to get the lay of the land and keep my head down for a little bit.”

“I’m sure you’ll win them over in no time, Spook.” She rolled her eyes and reached for a kiss. “I love you, Cass. Now and forever. I promise.”

“I love you, too, Johnny. I’ll see you soon.” Cass stayed until he was walked out of sight, the chain heavy against her chest once he disappeared from her view.

Soon was never soon enough.

#masters of the air #john egan #callum turner #mota #masters of the air fanfiction #john egan fanfiction #callum turner fanfiction #mota fanfiction #masters of the air fanfic #john egan fanfic #callum turner fanfic #mota fanfic

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shift-shaping · 1 month ago

Text

please don't stop

enaste invites solas to join her on the roof. it's going to be a cold night, you see.

rating: explicit

pairing: solavellan

warnings: 18+, solavellan

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first fic in this series

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Enaste curled on to her side, blankets wrapped around her like a cocoon, and tried again to will herself to sleep. The air on the roof smelled like the ocean and carried the quiet murmurs of distant gatherings. If she looked out past the overhang that protected her from potential rain, she could see the dense veil of stars strewn across the dark night sky. She'd even had the chance to bathe before crawling into bed. It was cool and soothing and exactly what she'd pictured when she first climbed the ladder from her room.

So if everything was so perfect, if she'd gone so long without sleep, why wouldn't it come to her?

The situation on the ground was tenuous at best. The city guard and the nobles they protected were actively hostile to any attempt Enaste or her allies made to clear the wells; they believed themselves at the precipice of a major elven rebellion, bolstered by the support of the elf-ruled Inquisition. Even the Chantry presence in the city was entirely unhelpful, dedicated as they were to permanent neutrality.

Blackwall believed they would call for backup, and Enaste sent for her own in anticipation. The nearest resupply outpost Cullen had set up for them could supply reinforcements, though in what numbers she was unsure. She also sent a crow to Skyhold updating her advisors on the situation, but any help from them would take days, at best, to arrive.

She did not want to involve her clan any more than she already had, and in a third letter she'd urged Deshanna to move them out of the area.

The lower classes of the city had been more understanding, especially after one of the more trusted dwarven merchants recognized the danger of the red lyrium. He'd said something about Kirkwall, and Bartrand, and with that alone she figured she owed Varric her gratitude upon their return. Whatever he'd been through had made their efforts to sway many of Wycome's residents to her side much easier.

So with three letters in flight and half the city preparing for battle against her and her allies, perhaps she should have expected sleep to evade her. Her thoughts swam like minnows in her head, and try as she might to slow them they kept slipping from her grasp.

What did not escape her was the painful reality of how poorly she'd handled everything. The Duke was dead, the blood mage had escaped, and her face burned where the infiltrator's arrow cut her. The wells were still poisoned with red lyrium. Her allies were exhausted and the most powerful people in the city wanted her dead. Even now she was hardly safe, protected only by the density of the alienage and the unwillingness of her enemies to enter it.

And how long would that unwillingness last? Bran wanted to prevent a purge, but she feared she'd only brought it on them faster.

Perhaps she should have stayed out of this, let Jester and Lady Volant handle this matter on their own. Since when had her presence really helped anything? The Anchor was useful, she supposed, but maybe Isabela had a point: perhaps they would all be better off if Enaste cut off her hand and left it on Cassandra's pillow.

She needed to relieve herself.

Once she'd untangled her legs from her blankets, she stood with a wince and opened the hatch back down to her room. She was careful not to make any excessive noise as she eased herself down the ladder; Solas was a heavy sleeper, but not so heavy he'd sleep through her falling on her ass.

He snorted as she slipped past him, but did not wake. There was a washroom attached to her tiny quarters with a chamberpot inside, a feature that would have been unthinkable to her less than a year ago but now, compared to Skyhold's more elaborate waste disposal, was downright rustic.

She must have taken longer than she thought, because when she re-entered the room Solas was sitting on the edge of the bed and looking up at the hatch.

"Oh, sorry," she said quietly. He looked at her, eyes shining an eerie violet in the dark. "I didn't mean to leave it open."

He shook his head. "No need to apologize. The fresh air is appreciated."

She stepped closer to him. "Are you feeling better?"

"Yes," his voice rasped, and she smirked as he cleared his throat. "And you? Have you been able to rest, Inquisitor?"

"No," she said bluntly. She looked up at the hatch. "There's too much going on."

He lowered his voice. "Are you comfortable?" His words were gentle, kind, and the compassion in them warmed her heart.

"Yes. It's nice, seeing the stars, smelling the ocean." She leaned against the ladder, standing directly in front of him. He watched her, meeting her eyes, and suddenly she was hyper-aware of how little her clothing left to the imagination: her shirt was lightweight and tight, and her leggings were essentially underwear. That she was wearing something so revealing hadn't occurred to her until now; being seen in her nightclothes had never bothered her until he was the one looking.

"I... Imagine that would be comforting," he said slowly. Her face and ears felt hot.

"You should see," she replied, a little too quickly. She looked at the hatch nervously. "The roof, I mean. It's nice."

She kept her eyes off him as he spoke, but the humor in his voice was obvious. "You did say that." Then he paused, and she didn't know what would happen if she looked at him but she wasn't brave enough to find out. The silence lingered heavy and thick and a chill raced across her skin. "I suppose I could... have a look."

She smiled, still determined not to look at him. Then she climbed the ladder up to the rooftop alcove she'd made into her bed. It was a very small space, just big enough for her nest of blankets, with a small strip of space beside it for her shoes.

"How did you bring the blankets up here?" Solas asked, sounding impressed.

She smirked. "You're a very heavy sleeper." She collapsed on to her makeshift bed, legs crossed, and yawned.

He scoffed. "Hardly that heavy."

He was wrong, but she was only teasing. She nodded to a mechanism on the side of the roof. "There are pulleys on a lot of the windows and rooftops here. Once you know which one is yours, it's easy to just pull things up."

"Clever," he said, but he was distracted. She finally looked at him again, just fast enough to catch him avert his gaze.

He'd been staring at her. She narrowed her eyes, saying nothing as he looked out over the rooftops and held his arms behind his back. Somewhere in the distance, she heard the sound of breaking glass and cackling laughter.

"You should stay up here with me," she said, finally, softly, and drew her knees to her chest. "It's warm enough now but... it'll be colder in the morning."

He closed his eyes for a moment, and even when he opened them he still wasn't looking at her. "Inquisitor..."

"You don't have to call me that, either," she corrected gently. "I don't... I don't want to be that with you." A small, sad smile tugged at his lips. "Please, Solas." She wanted him there, wanted his warmth beside her and his breath at her ear and his arm on her waist. She wanted to sleep knowing he was alive and safe beside her, that no one could hurt them because they were together. "Stay."

Then he finally looked at her, and exhaled slowly, and behind him the stars spread out like a map against the endless void. She offered him her hand, already so close she could almost touch him.

And he took it, his long fingers so strong around hers. He knelt, easing into the blankets, still holding her hand as he sat down beside her. He shifted, her hand sliding to his forearm. He looked at it, then at her face. He gently brushed her cheek with his knuckles, and time itself froze around her. Her eyes traced the hard cut of his jaw and the soft fullness of his mouth. Then he turned his hand to cup her cheek, fingers just barely gracing the edge of her bandages. He eased her close, and she shut her eyes.

He pressed a careful kiss to her hairline. His lips were warm, and soft, and even when he pulled away his presence lingered on her skin.

Her brows furrowed, her chest filled with a strange mixture of happiness and dissatisfaction. He pulled back, searching her face, and he must have picked up on her confusion. He chuckled softly, and the sound alone –rumbling deep in the minute space between them– scattered her thoughts. "You actually have to sleep, da'len."

"Or I could--"

"Sleep," he was teasing now, playful, as though she were an unruly apprentice, and that imagery wasn't helping her get to sleep any sooner.

"Will you meet me in the Fade? We could... continue our lessons." He laughed more openly now as he pulled back from her. It was such a beautiful, frustrating sound.

"If you have the stamina for it, I will meet you in the Fade." He shifted so he was lying down on his back, putting more distance between them. The bed was so small, how did he manage to be so far away? "If not, I will see you in the morning."

She sighed and gave up. Admittedly, she was tired, and just having him close made her more comfortable than when she was alone. Yet exhaustion didn't stop her gaze from wandering over his broad chest, from taking in his large, elegant hands, from wondering how they would feel if he–

"Enaste," he started, but she cut him off.

"Touch me."

A demand, a plea, two words that split the night around them. He inhaled sharply, staring up at the sky. "Please, just... please." She lay on her side, facing him.

He was quiet, and the playfulness in his expression disappeared. He shifted to his side. His shimmering eyes flicked to her face, taking her in. He shook his head slowly, as if in disbelief.

Then he reached up and traced a delicate line from her cheek to her shoulder. Her eyes widened and her body flushed with heat.

Suddenly he pushed her down into the blankets. Her breath caught in her throat and her eyes widened in shock. He leaned over her, the stars behind him, and for a moment she thought –was he scared?

"Please," she insisted. The weight of his hand on her shoulder set a fire in her core. "Please, Solas, I want you to touch me." She wrapped her hand around his wrist as he pinned her to the bed. He eased off, and in response she brought his hand down so that it cupped the curve of her breast. "I want you." Her nightclothes bore no padding –he was only a thin layer of fabric from her bare chest.

His free hand reached up to stroke her cheek, and it was so hot beneath his touch. She could see the conflict in his eyes, a turmoil she could not begin to interpret. Was this wrong of her? Was she too plain, too inexperienced, too desperate? Was she pressuring him into something he didn't want?

He leaned close and brought his lips to her neck and in his rolling, gentle tenor said: "you are so beautiful, Enaste."

The hand on her breast squeezed softly, and the thrill of his touch made her pulse pound. His teeth brushed the sensitive skin below her jaw and she shivered. She still held him by the wrist and felt the wiry muscles there tense as he palmed her full, heavy breast. His hand brushed across her hard nipple and she cried out –in need, in shock, in a bottomless hunger for more.

He paused, pulling away from her neck, and the concern in his eyes sent a wave of affection through her blood. "I'm, it's– don't stop," she sputtered, and his deep, rumbling chuckle made her feel like she was suddenly expected to survive without any bones.

"Ma nuvenin, da'len," he nearly growled the words into her skin. He grasped her breast again, its weight filling his hand, and a single stroke of his thumb across her nipple made her entire body shudder with pleasure. She bucked her hips involuntarily and a wet, desperate sound escaped her lips.

No one had ever touched her like this, except herself. That Solas was here, now, his hands toying with her breasts and brushing the skin of her neck with his soft lips was overwhelming, all-consuming. Then his teeth brushed against her ear and she briefly forgot who she was. She moaned, deep and low from somewhere base inside her. He teased her nipple between his fingers, over the fabric, making her squirm and gasp and push her chest towards him and the friction of her shirt on her skin only made it all stronger.

He pulled back from her neck, and her skin was damp where he'd marked it. He hovered over her, watching her pant and gasp beneath him. It took so little effort for him to make her weak. His hand lingered on her chest, his grip firm but not enough to hurt.

She reached up and cupped his cheek. His thumb trailed around her nipple, tantalizingly light. He leaned in to her, and she shifted to meet him.

Again he did not kiss her, and instead brought his teeth to the other side of her neck. She would have been disappointed were it not for the movement of his free hand: he stroked the bare skin of her lower stomach where her shirt had come up, and the feeling of his skin on hers was electrifying. He just barely touched her, the contact a ghost along her nerves.

Her eyes widened. The emptiness inside her cunt, the dampness she felt –he was so close, and her body was so sensitive, and she needed him to touch her. She grasped at the back of his head and pushed him into her neck, quickly, hungrily.

He groaned against her, sending shocks of pleasure across her skin. The sound reverberated through her body and sent a wave of slick between her legs. From their earliest battles together she'd wanted him, wanted to know how the hands that helped her off the ground could touch her, how the subtle music of his voice would feel against her ear, how the arms that so expertly wielded a staff could hold her.

His palm flattened against her stomach. She grasped his wrist, urging him into her leggings. He hesitated, halting as she pushed him.

"Don't stop, please don't stop," she breathed. "I want you, I need you, please don't stop." She let go of his wrist, and wrapped her arms around his back. "I want this. Solas, please."

He panted against her skin. His hesitation hung heavy in those scant millimeters between them. "Inquisitor..."

His use of her title made her heart drop. He couldn't do this, not now. "Don't go," she begged. She tried to hold him closer but he wouldn't budge. "Don't –don't leave me like this." His breath hitched against her. She gripped his shirt. "Please."

He pulled away. The force he had to use to untangle himself from her was like a knife in her heart. Her hands dropped away from him. "I am distracting you, Inquisitor. I'm sorry." He already sounded so far away in that cold night air.

It was more than that. She knew it. There was something about her that he couldn't bring himself to be with. She was too weak, too stupid, too ugly. If her magic was stronger, if she was smarter, if her decisions didn't hurt the people she was supposed to protect, if she was someone else–

But she wasn't. And she couldn't be.

"Fine," she said. He stood slowly, turning away from her. She stared off the edge of the roof, into the sky. "Go."

His presence lingered a moment longer, hovering in the space she'd made for herself. Then she heard the ladder creak, the hatch close, and he was gone.

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#solavellan #solas #dragon age #glimpses #fic: raven #normal healthy couple behavior 👍👍👍#_(:ι」∠)_#asdfghfdsa #🥲

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heraxic · 9 months ago

Text

re8 as classical music

badly explained cause its 2am and i dont know musical terms.

Btw if anyone has any notes or other songs that would fit them id love to see it-

Ethan: Tchaikovsky - Marche Slave

youtube

Slow start, Ethan is unknowingly ensnared in a trap. As he realizes the danger Rose (and himself) are in the song becomes tragic and determined. Fastpaced strings, frantic beats —like prey escaping from predator— keeps escalating into something more and more insurmountable. A hopeful jingle is heard as Ethan finds out he can still save his daughter. A heroic theme plays as he overcomes the horrors despite it all (a sense of control over the situation is marked by highpitched anxious flutes superimposed by a deep stable horn). Then comes the first faceoff with Miranda who taunts him and Ethan’s tragic hero theme comes to a grinding halt as his heart gets pulled out of his chest. The drums pick up again and the little soldier is off to his final battle.

Mia: Claude Debussy - Clair De Lune

youtube

Sadly the real Mia doesn’t appear much. In the Winters home, Ethan writes that Mia doesn’t want to talk about what they went through in Louisiana, which leaves him with a lot of questions unanswered. In the flashback where she desperately tries reaching out saying ‘𝘺𝘰𝘶 matter’, she still can’t help keeping secrets- maybe out of fear that Ethan wouldn’t let it go (being extremely persistent) and they’d never return to normal. The song is heartbreaking and sad as she struggles coming to terms with the guilt and grief over what she’s done and what the one she loves went through because of it. On a last somber note, her child, who takes after her father both in looks and unresolved powers, is all she has left.

Rose: Saint-Saëns - Le Cygne

youtube

A little girl whos only ever known unconditional, all encompassing love. Even before her birth, it was known that her life would be full of uncertainty. Though stolen away for possessing powers she’s not even aware of yet, she continues to live and provide a beacon of hope for her family.

Chris: Richard Wagner - Ride of the Valkyries

youtube

Comes in the dead of night and rains hell on the Winters home. In his eyes, he’s doing the right thing, but has made himself the villain to the one he was trying to protect (victorious trumpets superimposed by high fearful strings). The transport gets intercepted by Miranda and the music falls. Once Chris finally explains himself to Ethan they’re allowed a brief bit of victory (steadier horn) as their combined efforts take down Miranda’s last line of defense (Heisenberg). In the end, Chris has to live with the victory of taking down the megamycete, the guilt and grief over Ethan’s death/sacrifice, and the troubling news from BSAA. A tainted victory.

Alcina: Tchaikovsky - Swan Lake

youtube

Appears first as a noble elegant socialite. She’s at the height of her power, owns a castle and three daughters and believes herself to be Miranda’s favorite. It’s business as usual, calm serene music. Suddenly an outsider has made his way into her home, killing her daughters one by one. She reaches out to Miranda, who only cares about the stupid ceremony, and realizes everything she knew was a lie. Anger and frustration builds. The music deepens, falls and rises again as she transforms, tries taking revenge on Ethan and fails, having lost everything in one evening.

Bela, Cassandra, Daniela: Rimsky Korsakov - Flight of the Bumblebee

youtube

Self explanatory. Hurried, manic and playful.

Donna: Tchaikovsky - Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy

youtube

Entrancing but with eerie insidious undertones. Fitting for the childlike dollmaker and her little porcelain friends. Ends with a fast and chilling theme for the twisted game of hide and seek

Moreau: Edvard Grieg - Hall of the Mountain King

youtube

Quiet, lumbering and slow. Ethan takes the Rose flask back easily; threatened with losing Mother Miranda it very quickly escalates as panic sets in and Moreau throws everything he has at him. The music swells and ends with a bang.

Karl: Aram Khachaturian - Masquerade Suite

youtube

A bold start. Right from the beginning he exudes arrogance, charisma and danger. He plays nice in front of Miranda with a waltz that picks up in intensity when putting Ethan through his first gauntlet. Then the tone gets deeper and quieter for a moment, as he plots in secret; it’s finally time to set his plan in action. It’s a race to the finish line as Ethan tears through the other lords, unknowingly playing right into Miranda’s plan. Realizing he could be a particularly useful asset/ally, Heisenberg puts him through the second gauntlet. The music is sadistically playful as he tests his will and endurance. Upon failing to recruit Ethan, the music picks up for the third gauntlet and ends with a bang, as Karl dies at the hands of Miranda.

Duke: Georges Bizet - Votre Toast

youtube

A friendly face unfitting in a place such as this. The upbeat and energetic theme sticks out like a sore thumb among the others. Whimsy and grandiosity acts as a brilliant facade for his enigmatic true nature. Though the jolly merchant schtick may be a lie, he always delivers on service.

Miranda: Sergei Prokofiev - Dance of the Knights

https://youtu.be/bBsKplb2E6Q?si=jnSpMO-bIhEcjJzb

Immediately imposes a sense of authority and dread. The dark theme plays over and over as she performs the same cruel experiments expecting different results, though it only succeeds in remowing her further from humanity. She imagines a world of pure bliss in acquiring her child, which at this point is as illusory as chasing the holy grail since she’s never satisfied. When she hears of Rose she schemes her way into the Winters home, elated to find the perfect vessel after a century of searching. She steals the child away, leaving behind a trail of destruction that finally catches up to her.

#re8 #re8 ethan winters #ethan winters #re8 mia #re8 rose #re8 chris redfield #re8 alcina #lady dimitrescu #re8 donna #re8 moreau #re8 karl heisenberg #re8 heisenberg #re8 duke #re8 mother miranda #classical music

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commandershepardvasfuckit · 8 months ago

Text

Chapter 4 for the indulgent original writing (4.2k words)

Chapters 1-3 are in my pinned post.

Just unpolished writing to get ideas out of my head

No real content warnings like last last chapter, but wow it’s actual story lol

The entire way down to the dining hall he never faltered, never once did you slip in his grip, never did he need to readjust his hold on you, just strong and steady. It felt like the trek there had taken forever, just miles of hallways and endless flights of stairs, though it also might have dragged on from

your embarrassment of being carried about half clothed clearly in a state where everyone you passed very clearly knew how you spent your morning.

Much like the other parts of the palace you have seen, the dining hall seemed to follow the king’s personal style. Dark wood floors and furniture, drapes and tapestries trimmed in black and gold, jewels inlaid in surfaces that most definitely did not need it.

He took his place at the head of the table, an overly ornate carved chair, nearly a throne, but when you went to climb off his lap and sit in your own chair he tightened his grip.

“No my pet, I’d much rather you warm my lap”.

Serving staff trailed in, the woman from yesterday, Mirabette, and two other women who you guessed where probably around your age.

“And what would you like for breakfast my treasure?” he asked. “Anything you little heart desires”.

This would have been exciting had you not been so overwhelmed. Every possible food seemed to slip from your mind and you fidgeted on his lap, wracking your brain for any possibly reasonable answer.

“If you keep wiggling about like that you’re going to get me hard again” he whispered in your ear, promptly making you freeze. “Oh don’t tense up like that. If I choose to fuck you over the table I’ll send the staff away, don’t worry. I’m not fond of sharing after all”.

His words were not reassuring, regardless of whether he was telling the truth or not.

“Would you prefer if I just chose what was for breakfast and you can add anything you can think of? I do suppose you aren’t used to so many options, it must be quite overwhelming”.

You nodded, “Yes please, my king”.

“Very well! Mirabette, a pot of tea, my usual, and bring everything you can think of, spare nothing for my little pet. Such a sweet little thing should be pampered, especially with how well she pleased me this morning”.

“Yes, my king” Mirabette turned on her heel and disappeared back through the doors, never once batting an eye or making any acknowledgement of how the king spoke so openly.

The two other women remained at the side of the room. One seemed entirely at ease, hands clasped behind her back and simply staring forward, ignoring everything much the same way Mirabette had.

The other women though, a sour expression on her face as she watched you. Eyes narrowed and staring at you as if she thought to stare a hole straight through you.

“Cassandra!” yelled the king, “Either you will control your expression or you will retire to the kitchen, I care not for your opinions. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, my king” she curtsied, her facial a forced neutral as she stood back up.

“Pay her no mind, my treasure. It appears some may be jealous of my affections for you” he kissed the top of your head. “No one’s opinion matters but mine, and I have quite the high opinion of you”.

Mirabette returned with a large tray, precariously balancing a tea pot, two tea cups with saucers, milk, sugar, honey, lemon wedges, various breads, butter, jams, and other small pastries. “Tea and a little something while you wait. The kitchen is working on everything else. May I get you anything else, my king?”

“No, that is all for now. Thank you”.

Mirabette curtsied again, same neutral smile as before, and took her place between the other women.

“Tell me, my sweet little pet, how do you prefer you tea?”

“I don’t know, my king. I haven’t really had tea truthfully” tea in your city was quite the luxury. As it was not a port city or along any major trade routes, nor had a suitable climate for its cultivation, any true tea was a costly import reserved only for the rich.

“Another first for you then. Fine wine and bath soaps last night, sleeping in the bed of your king, wearing my clothes, the first of many times being so throughly fucked” he smirked at you, clearly enjoying embarrassing you.

It was working. You buried your face in his chest, even clinging to him was better than making eye contact with any of the staff.

“So cute that you’re flustered, but I’m sure everyone here knows your role, they see that pretty collar around your neck. No one should be surprised to hear that I fucked you until you cried this morning, how you satisfied me so well, how my cum is still on your thighs as you sit here on my lap in front of my staff”.

“Why are you doing this?” you asked.

“Manners”.

“My king, why are you trying to embarrass me?”

“No, little one, not embarrass, I’m simply praising your good behavior. I think everyone should know what a good girl you’ve been for me”.

You hated how he called you ‘good girl’. Hated that part of you enjoyed his praise, hated how his words made your legs a little weak and caused a heat between your legs.

“Speaking of how well you’ve satisfied me, I do suppose you’ll need something for that, I’m much past the point of wanting to sire any more whelplings”.

In surprise you yanked your face away from his chest to stare at him.

“What? Were you not aware of that possibility? Has no one ever taught you where children come from?” he laughed.

“I know how it works with humans! You’re not human though!”

“But human bodies are highly adaptable you’ll find, almost like humans arose just to serve dragons. Not that humans are particularly capable of having very sturdy whelplings anyways, half whelps just don’t have the hardiness of a pure dragon. They’ll look just like a pure dragon, but never have the full magic or size. But don’t worry yourself over the details, like I said, I have no desire to deal with that anymore”.

You tried to banish the thought. Possibility aside, the entire concept seemed rather unpleasant in general, especially with him being the father.

“Alondis!” he barked, “Let the apothecary know I need something to avoid any unnecessary consequences from this morning and something for daily use”.

You had not noticed Alondis standing just inside the doorway, he seemed an ever present constant, a bored expression on his face as he waited on orders.

“Yes, my king” he vanished through the doorway.

“Now, little one, where were we? Tea! Yes, I’ll prepare yours the same I take mine in that case”.

He leaned forward to grab the tea pot, his sudden movement nearly sending you toppling off his lap and causing you to wrap your arms around his shoulders to prevent falling.

“I’m not going to let you fall, my other arm is still around you. I promise I’ve got you. Though I do quite like you clinging to me like this”.

Gods he was warm, even in the drafty open air of the dining hall it felt like there was a fire just below his skin. Clothed only in his shirt it felt quite nice to be so close to him.

“There you go, a nice cup of tea for a lovely pet” he handed you the cup.

It was warm, sweet and earthy as you sipped it.

“Is it to your liking? I do prefer mine on the sweeter side. I fear I’ve developed quite the sweet tooth from spending so much time around humans, perhaps not the most becoming of a dragon”.

“It’s good, my king”.

“Wonderful! Hopefully everything else will be- Cassandra!” his voice dropped into a growl, his lips pulled back into an angry snarl that showed off sharp teeth.

You snapped your head over to look at the woman, her nose was wrinkled in disgust and a sneer on her face.

“Kitchen! Now! I will not tolerate your disobedience after you have already been warned. You do not have to like or approve of my new plaything but I’d rather have you locked up for the foreseeable future than show any disrespect to myself or my pet” his grip around you tightened.

“Though maybe it would do you better to remember your place below my pet if you were her personal handmaiden. I was going to have Mirabette attend to her, but Mirabette already has to keep all of you in line so instead you will wait on her. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, my king” she responded through gritted teeth.

His chest was heaving and he was not settling down. This was a much stronger anger than you had experienced last night when you refused him, this was animalistic and much scarier.

“Out! Everyone!” he yelled and the three women wasted no time retreating to the kitchen.

Tentatively you leaned your head against his chest and tried to wrap your arms around him, hoping to calm him down. Your touch seemed to snap him out of it for the most part.

Much of the rage receded from his expression as he looked down at meet your own frightened expression.

“Oh darling, I’m sorry you had to see that” he kissed the top of your head softly “I do suppose a display like that does not really endear you to me”.

Darling. Not pet, or treasure, or bird, or even ‘my’ in front of it, just darling.

“Why don’t we enjoy our tea and a light breakfast? I have something I’d really like to show you”.

“Whatever you would like, my king” you answered.

“I would like it to be your decision, actually”.

You furrowed your brow, trying to suss out if this was a trap or game, but his expression genuine seeming.

“In that case, I do think that would be nice, my king”.

Breakfast was a fairly quick affair, and he promised you a much nicer lunch to make up for it. He actually seemed sorry for his outburst even though he continually framed it not as him losing control but as Cassandra making him lose control, though for a dragon that was probably to closest he would ever get to an admission of fault.

Once more he carried you in his arms, this time you wrapped your arms around his neck and laid your head on his chest as he carried you out into the large central courtyard.

“I want you to see me, my actually self and not just- this” he vaguely gestured to himself once he had sat you down on the stairs. “I don’t get the chance to just exist as me often, but I do want you to fully know me”.

“My king, why do you spend so much time looking human then?” you ask.

“It’s just easier this way. The world isn’t really built for dragons anymore, it hasn’t been for a long time, since long before my hatching even. And there’s not many of us left, especially from pure bloodlines. Too much infighting between the bloodlines and humans advanced too much to control the same way”.

“I live somewhere clearly not meant for a dragon, and the process of changing shape isn’t exactly pleasant, it’s not something I do often” he said. “I haven’t even been able to be myself in my own palace since I was a whelpling”.

“Did you grow up here?” you asked.

“I did, before this was my territory it was my father’s, though it was a much smaller territory then. I suppose you’ve heard the stories about me” he smiled.

“Though when I was still little, young enough where I couldn’t even take a human form yet, I would run down the hallways as fast as I could. Oh my mother hated it, she’d be chasing me yelling ‘Valathos! Valathos! Get back there! You’re going to knock someone over!’ She never could catch me though” he laughed, “You try catching a young dragon while you’re stuck on two legs”.

His relaxed expression quickly vanished, his eyes widening as if he just saw something truly awful. “Forget what I just told you” he snapped.

“What?”

“What I just told you, forget it, that was not meant for your ears”.

“Oh” you said softly, not sure what to quite say or what the issue really was, but you had a name for him finally, Valathos. You wracked your brain, trying to remember if you had ever heard his name before, but it was not familiar at all. In all the stories or songs never once had you heard his name, just titles and epithets.

An awkward silence settled between you both. It was a strange bit of information to learn about him, that staying in a human form was less a choice and more of a necessity. As you mulled your thoughts over a noticeable expression must have settled on your face.

“You don’t need to look upon me with such pity, it’s my choice to confine myself as such. I could fly off and control my territory as a dragon at all times if I truly wanted, but with how the world is, this is just easier”.

“I don’t mean to be nosy, but what is so unpleasant about changing shapes?” you asked.

“To be honest, going from this form to my true shape is actually euphoric. I can’t really explain it, there’s nothing that feels like it, just this rush of freedom, feeling like I can finally breathe again. Nothing compares”.

“It’s going from that to this” he once more gestured to himself, “that is so unpleasant. To feel yourself collapsing and folding in on yourself. Every fiber of your being getting twisted and condensed until what is left isn’t you at all. I try to keep a few things, but nature doesn’t like splitting the differences, it wants humans to look like humans and dragons to look like dragons. I try to keep some height, my teeth to some degree, and my eyes. I couldn’t stand to see this face and not even see my own eyes”.

“I didn’t realize any of that” you said softly.

“No, I can’t say I’ve ever heard of a dragon really openly admitting it to a human. It’s not a particularly powerful image for us huh? That one of the most well known parts of our magic is actually so horrible and painful that many of us just choose to stay trapped to avoid it”.

“You don’t have to do this now. I’m sure there will be other times where you’ll have to change shape and I’ll see you then instead of putting yourself through it now”.

“It’s been nearly ten years since last I was myself. Not that long compared to my age really, but it’s not often there’s a reason where I have to change shapes. I’d rather just show you on my own terms instead of my hand being forced”.

“Then I think I’d really like to see the real you” you smiled.

“I’m quite the handsome dragon you know, even if you may not be able to tell” he smiled back.

“And what makes you such a handsome dragon?” you teased.

“My horns! I’ll have you know my bloodline is one of only a few to have double horns and I’m the only of my siblings to get them! You would be very impressed if you were a dragon”.

“No, I’m very impressed!” you held your hands over your head, mimicking horns.

“Very dignified” he laughed, “Thank you for humoring me, I don’t really joke much anymore. You’re a sweet little thing to indulge me so” he ruffled you hair.

“Well at least the first part is fun” he shrugged, “Help me undress?”

“What?”

“I actually happen to somewhat like this shirt and these pants, would be a shame to destroy them in the process, so help your king undress?”

“Yes, my king” you smirked.

He knelt down to where you sat on the stairs so you would not have to stand. You lifted his shirt up, letting your hands linger on his chest, looking over the scars than adorned his skin as you removed the shirt.

“So are the scars your own choice too then?” you asked.

“No, those I can’t change. Injuries inflicted by magic can’t been covered up, even by magic”.

“You have quite a few”.

“I’ve lived a long time, I’ve established a large territory, you don’t manage that without fighting, especially with other dragons”.

He stood up and kicked off his boots, “Now, I will ask you turn away while I change forms. The magic tends to be too bright for human eyes and the process has been described as a bit grotesque, so I’d prefer if you did not see that part. Understand?”

“Sure”.

“Manners” he said firmly, apparently whatever playful closeness was between you moment ago was over now.

“Yes, my king”. You quickly finished removing his pants.

“Do not turn around until I tell you to. I’m serious”.

You heard his footsteps recede to the other side of the courtyard and even with your back to him the whole area was painfully bright. It dragged on for what felt like ages, before you heard his voice.

“Will you face me, little one?”

His voice echoed oddly, it was still very much his voice but something felt off.

As you turned around you found yourself sitting in his massive shadow.

This was the Dragon King, not the man you had just spent the last day with. He was imposing, towering over you even when sitting, your head not even level with his elbow. His scales were a dark charcoal tone, nearly black, his claws a gold tone, you could see where his own personal style came from now.

His eyes though, they were familiar, the same piecing gaze as always but even harder to read like this.

“You are quite handsome like this” you smiled at him.

“Simple flattery, but I’ll accept it”.

His voice did not seem to emanate from his mouth, rather it echoed in your mind.

“How are you doing that?” you asked.

“Speaking to you? Just how dragons communicate, we’re not exactly built to speak verbally like humans”.

“Can you speak like this in your other form?”

“No. I don’t have much access to magic in my other shape, just the basics” he stretched out to lay down, lowering his head to rest on the ground to rest next to you on the stairs and to be relatively eye level with you.

“So, you like this? My actual self?” he asked somewhat uncertainly.

“I do, I meant it when I said you were quite handsome”.

“Did you see my horns?” he tilted his head to the side, careful to not knock you over.

“Quite magnificent, my king” you ran your hand along one of the horns.

Two horns swept back from the top of his head that curved up at the end. The second set arced back before curving back along his jaw to point forward, one horn on each side to frame the center horns.

“I like this, just having you near to me like this is nice” he said.

You leaned against the side of his face, avoiding the point of his horn. His scales were rough, but there was a warmth to him, like he had been sitting out in the sunlight for hours.

“I like it too” you said.

What felt like hours passed, and at some point you definitely napped for a while, but it was comfortable, there was a secure feeling about being curled up against him like this.

“My little pet, it’s time to get up” he gentled nuzzled his face against you, “I know I promised to take you around the palace, and a nice lunch to make up for breakfast, but I long for the skies. It’s been so long since I’ve soared, since I’ve felt the wind beneath my wings. I cannot bring myself to confine myself to the ground quite yet. I hope you don’t hold my nature against me”.

“No, I understand. It’s the same anyone else would want, their freedom” you could not look him in the eye. The horrible irony was not lost on you, that he felt like he had no freedom while he held so many captive here.

“It’s not the same” he said firmly, “The very nature of my being is to fly, to roam. The very nature of humans is to serve. Here at my side you’re able to fulfill your nature and serve me, it would do well to remember your place”.

Powerful wing gusts knocked you over as he took off, the discussion clearly over.

As you tried to pick yourself up off the ground, a gloved hand reached out to offer assistance.

“He’s a hypocrite, and frankly an asshole, in case you didn’t notice” it was Alondis.

“Yeah, I don’t know what I was expecting” you took his hand and let him help you up. “How much of that did you see?”

“Not much. I got back to the dining hall and you were both gone but it’s pretty difficult to hide a dragon so it wasn’t hard to find you. You were napping when I got out here so I left to actually go get some stuff done and I had just gotten back to hear you lecture him on freedom. Quite boldly of you for someone literally wearing a collar”.

“Shut up”.

“Look, I’m sorry. I’m not trying to be rude, but you’ve been here for less than a day and you think you’re going to find something to say to him that hundreds of others haven’t already? He quite literally will never see a human as anything more than a subservient pet. His nature isn’t freedom, it’s subjugation, sometimes he just hides it well”.

“Yeah, I’m noticing that” you sighed.

“He’ll be charming as long as he gets his way, praise you and dote on you, as long as you’re a docile little lap dog at his feet. But he was so happy to announce that he made you cry this morning, happy to tell everyone that you tried to push back against him and he put you back in your place”.

“So that’s just it? Just roll over and take it?”

“I mean, in a very literal sense for you” Alondis smirked.

“That’s not funny!”

“I’m sorry, that was an awful joke, wasn’t it? I swear I’m not trying to be an ass for no reason, I don’t get the chance to speak freely often. I’m either tailing him around waiting on whatever orders he has, or having to be the jerk in charge keeping everything running around here”.

“Have you been here a long time?” you asked.

“About 27 years now in all, 10 years of being his personal guard though, and no, I don’t know why a dragon needs a personal guard either before you ask”.

“Personal guard? Not errand boy?” you teased.

“Very funny. Captain of the Royal Guard, personal guard to the king, and now glorified babysitter of you when he’s out”.

“Of me?”

“Yep, like it or not, you’re stuck with me. Strict orders to keep you out of trouble when he’s not around”.

“So that’s it? I step a toe out of line and you run and tattle on me?”

“Gods no, I really don’t care about what you do as long as I don’t get yelled at for it. I have no interest in being another captor to you, we’re in the same boat after all” he shrugged.

“So, uh, 27 years?” you asked tentatively.

“27 years of captivity and servitude, yeah. It’s great, been here longer than I lived in my own town before” he said bitterly, “A royal caravan came through to collect tribute and unfortunately the previous guard captain decided that I’d make a good apprentice so that was that. I was 14 at the time”.

“I’m so sorry” you said, but your words felt hollow. You did not know what to else to say though. ‘I’m sorry’ did not begin to cover how you felt about his situation, or yours, or for anyone else trapped here.

“Yeah, so am I. None of us deserve this, waiting hand and foot on that monster. But you either play your role or suffer the consequences”. He handed you the bag he had been carrying, “For you, from the apothecary. Blue bottle for right now, green ones are daily. Apothecary said pick a consistent time to take the daily ones, unless you want little versions of him running about. And for all of our sakes, please be good about this, one of him is already more than enough”.

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