#the implications of this post is terrifying and awe-inspiring

[satans-codpiece]

Darkfic Enjoyer here. please share some of your dark thoughts since you said you only unleashed your demons in only one fic of yours >:)

With Ramattra, you mean? Because EY doesn't even come close to releasing demons as compared to a lot of stuff I wrote with Kylo Ren or Michael Myers.

I just never really got a lot of darkfic inspiration for him? I honestly haven't in quite a while-- I dunno if that's better commentary on my relationship with my recent string of blorbos or on my mental health lol. Because the potentiality for darkfic with Ramattra is right there.

TW: Noncon, kidnapping, paralysis/forced to watch, injury, probably more

I briefly started a hard noncon fic where Reader is injured and/or pinned in the wake of a Null Sector attack and Ramattra unleashes some of that pent-up rage on them. Lots of Ramattra using his strength to keep Reader still and him talking about how this is justified by the simple fact that they are human and deserve to suffer as so many omnics have.

But I just didn't have the drive to write it?? There's so many WIPs I have with him that I want to finish but can't force my awful brain to look at for more than a few minutes at a time, but with the noncon fic I wrote a little bit and then my brain was like mmm, no. not this flavor. I still love reading noncon with Ramattra, I just don't have that drive to write it.

Hell, even, a Reaper/Reader noncon fic (with Sombra/Ramattra noncon in the background) was of higher interest to me than Ramattra/Reader noncon.

(For interested parties: where Talon is done using NS so Reaper & Sombra are sent to deal with Ramattra & Reader, but in particular Reaper's more than happy to make a point on what happens to people who betray Talon. so Sombra disables Ramattra-- but makes sure that he's awake and aware of what's happening as Reaper attacks Reader, with maybe some unwanted wireplay so that he's forced to cum watching it).

But with Megatron it comes so naturally. The very first thing I wrote with him was “Mmm, fabricating desire in exchange for your own survival is hardly the worst idea your species has had.” Literally the first line of dialogue my muse spat out to me was him accusing (and approving of!!) Reader trying to seduce him so that he wouldn't kill them.

And everything I have written with him since then-- which is all unfinished or no-context snippets that idk if I'll post-- has involved some degree of fuckedupness.

Megatron/Reader mutual noncon + Starscream/Megatron/Reader where Starscream catches Reader & forces them to suck off a regular gun. And Reader's humiliated and scared and just so confused as to why Starscream has this regular human gun laying around- until they realize it's literally Megatron stuck in a new alt mode that they've been polishing with their tongue. To which Starscream giddily fucks them with Megatron's barrel and the whole time Reader is terrified because... what does an overload look like for a gun? Also, Starscream's motivation is much more centered on Megatron, Reader is completely incidental and just gave him an opportunity.

Megatron & Knock Out discussing the mental health implications of kidnapping a human for morale (everyone is jealous of the Autobots' pets obviously). Namely, Reader is having a bad time of it- who wouldn't?- and Megs suggests to KO that he'd rather kill this high-strung human now and replace them with one more... agreeable before the crew gets attached. KO (who is already attached) insists that Reader will feel better as they get acclimated.

During the events of Rock Bottom (TFP), it's Reader who finds Megatron. They, naively, agree to help him (because it's the right thing to do TM) in exchange for his promise that he won't harm any of the other humans or autobots in the mine. Of course, he just kidnaps Reader at the end instead. When they're furiously kicking the inside of his jet form, he'll insist he didn't lie; they weren't harmed, were they?

Not really super dark in the way any of the above are, but literally just a little dubcon-y drabble with Reader & Megatron making out and Megatron's denta cut Reader's lip. And Reader tries to back off, but Megatron is so fucking horny about it that he holds them still and kisses them harder.

And that's just what I've written. I've also toyed with Facsimile!Reader where Megatron fucks you because why not, you exist only to serve the decepticon cause and, well, you basically feel like a human on the inside and he's curious. Super fucked up not because of the dubcon but more in tone, that you entire existence is for obeying him and serving him and dying for him and you're okay with that.

[nehswritesstuffs]

Not A Doctor Who confession: given the choice between adopting Young Amelia Pond or Courtney (the kid who was in a few Capaldi episodes) to be your daughter, who would you choose?

THIS IS VERY INTERESTING ON SEVERAL NOTES.

One is that I’m a quarter Scottish (well, a bit over, but my paternal grandfather was the most recent immigrant from that sourcing). I’d understand wee Amelia and know about things she’d need in regards to her home culture. She was an interesting character study as a small child to start based on the fact she was raised in England but kept being Maximum Scottish, which shows how her ability to resist what she found to be unnecessary changes was in place quite early in life. That’s part of why she was able to resist the space-time crack in her wall, but whatever. She’d still get access to Burns Night festivals and fakey Highland Games and Irn Bru and we could learn Scottish Gaelic on Duolingo together.

Two is that my boyfriend is dark-skinned, and adopting Courtney would just kind look normal for us as a couple. We’d, again, know quite a bit about her specific cultural needs (is Courtney descended from Windrush immigrants? Older than that? Both? Neither? I guess we’ll never know) and the fact is we’d be fairly well-equipped to help her out in regards to staying on-track. There wouldn’t be a parent-teacher conference like the one poor Danny had to go through; I mean, she’s gonna be President of the United States of America. She has to stay on-track if she’s gonna be a good one (and hey we’re also Americans so that would help loads, as I think natural-born Americans adopting a foreign-born child makes them eligible to run, though don’t quote me on that considering we still have people whining about a natural-born citizen holding office). I actually think that in a parent-child situation, we’d get on great, if a bit rocky at first.

Three is that both Amelia and Courtney have both their parents in the end and they seem as though they are loving families from what we see of them. I wouldn’t want to edge in on that unless necessary.

Four is that I’m pretty sure Amy would’ve been my grade in school. That’s kinda weird and could cause problems. I wasn’t that into Lisa Frank and Jelly Pens as a kid and I can’t guarantee Amelia wasn’t either. We don’t have wide access to ClipHits and Tomogatchi and Spice World is decades old--issues would arise.

Five is that I’m pretty sure adopting Courtney would look like either I had a kid immediately after high school or that she’s from a potential previous relationship from my boyfriend’s side. That might cause problems as well, mainly in all the questioning.

Six is that there’s time travel involved. I would be very concerned about my child going off in some weird space-time box.

Seven is, well... why not both? They’d get on wonderfully and be best sisters by circumstance. They would cause absolute hell and no one could stop them... except their new mom and dad.

[zuko-always-lies]

ATLA AU Idea which is Basically “Azula Raises Katara for Several Years”

I’ve had this idea kicking around my head for months, and, since I have no intention of writing it, I figure I might as well post it. To be clear, the premise of this fanfic is “Azula, Katara, and Sokka get traumatized in ways they weren’t in canon, but the events that traumatize them potentially help lead to a better outcome in the long-term,” so be prepared for rough sailing.

This idea is very much inspired by all the “Katara gets kidnapped young and raised within the Fire Nation royal family” fanfics, which I think can be excellent if done with care. However, in a situation where Katara and Azula develop a relationship when they are young, the natural tendency is to make Katara the “motherly” or parental one, and I wanted to turn that on its head. I also wanted to explore some of the possible implications of Azula taking on adult sized responsibilities as a child and of the perverse ways that power differentials can influence things. I also wanted to explore some of the ways that Azula’s commitment to duty and responsibility can be a positive thing. Another ~2000 or so words under the cut.

The premise is that, shortly after Zuko gets banished, Katara gets captured by the Southern Raiders as the last Southern Water Tribe waterbender and brought back to Caldera and presented as a trophy to Ozai. Ozai’s first reaction is to have her executed, but fortunately Azula is also present in the throne room. For reasons which Azula doesn’t entirely understand herself but which definitely have something to do with her guilt over what happened to Zuko, Azula decides to intervene, despite the risks involved. However, not being Zuko, she manages to do this without provoking Ozai, through convincing him that Katara is more valuable alive as a trophy, a symbol, and a plaything than she is dead. Ozai doesn’t really care that much, so he pawns Katara off to Azula and basically forgets about her, accidentally using language that implies to Azula that Katara and taking care of Katara is now Azula’s responsibility. Azula is at an age where she’s started to take her responsibilities and duties with deadly seriousness.

Katara doesn’t know what to make of this all.  She’s been severely traumatized by being kidnapped and torn from her family and culture and by having her life threatened by Ozai. She’s aware that Azula saved her life, but the language Azula used to in order to do so sounds warped and screwed up to Katara, who is unaware that Azula had to say what she said in order to manipulate Ozai.  Katara noticed that Azula seemed a little nervous when she talked to Ozai, but Katara doesn’t initially know how risky and dangerous what Azula did was.

Again, Azula takes her responsibilities with deadly seriousness. So, when it becomes her responsibility to take care of Katara, Azula is determined to do the best possible job, even though she’s 11 and Katara is also 11. If there were any responsible adults present, they would intervene and talk to Azula about how awful an idea this is, but there aren’t any left.  In any case, Katara’s waterbending abilities make it so she has to be kept under some kind of supervision, Azula is perceptive enough to worry that Katara might be mistreated if she got fostered out, and in any case Azula is convinced she can do a better job than any foster family.

Azula is a badly abused 11 year old who grew up indoctrinated in an absolutely toxic ideology. She’s never really seen good parenting in her life. The idea of her trying to parent should be terrifying. Yet she’s aware that Ursa didn’t do the best job with her, and since Katara isn’t a “monster” Azula sees no reason to replicate Ursa’s behavior. Azula believes the way that Ozai treats her is absolutely justified, even though she has some knowledge of its negative effects on her, but since Katara isn’t a princess who has immense duties to her nation and family, Azula sees no reason to treat her that way. In fact, Azula is aware of ignorance about parenting, and tries to read as much about parenting as she can. She also reads as much about the water tribes as she can in order to try to understand Katara better.

In terms of being a “parent,” Azula is overall a little standoffish, absent, and demanding.  She doesn’t need to directly look after Katara’s physical care(she has servants for that), but she has to look after Katara’s emotional needs, her education, and her overall care. As a temporary measure, she arranges that Katara sleep on a cot in Azula’s room because she’s not sure where to put her, and this arrangement becomes permanent. This means Azula and Katara usually eat together, since Azula has taken most of her meals in her room, but Azula is very busy with her duties, training, and education, so they don’t spend much time together in a typical day. Azula has Katara officially declared a servant(but one who only reports to Azula) in order to regularize her status and allow Katara to draw a salary(most of which Azula holds in escrow for when Katara comes of age), but Azula only rarely asks Katara to do work; Katara had far more chores back in the Southern Water Tribe. On the other hand, Azula demands that Katara work hard in her education and on practicing her waterbending. Katara is too old to be sent to the Royal Fire Academy for Girls, but Azula obtains tutors for her, in addition to getting her whatever waterbending scrolls she can and trying to obtain the best possible bending coaches for Katara’s waterbending, sometimes even stepping in herself to try to coach Katara.

Azula is aware that Katara wants to return home, but she doesn’t think that Ozai would ever allow that, and, in any case, Azula is an imperialist who thinks Katara is better off being “civilized” in the Fire Nation than she would be back in her ignorant and “savage” home.  A large portion of Katara’s education is intended to “civilize” her. Azula doesn’t have firm ideas of where adult Katara will fit into Fire Nation society but plays with the idea of marrying her into the nobility or of making her governor of the conquered Water Tribes. So overall, Azula does a shockingly good job as “parent” given she’s an abused 11 year child acting within the toxic norms of the Fire Nation, but that still means she does a bad job, and her relationship with Katara remains pretty toxic.

Ozai and the rest of the court have some awareness of what’s going on, but they honestly don’t care as long Azula continues to be an exemplary princess, fulfills her duties, and continues to exceed expectations. Some members of the court even find Azula’s personal commitment to “civilizing” a savage to be inspiring. However, the burden of taking care of Katara means that Azula is under even more pressure than she is in canon, with the good news being that Azula has something more of a support network than in canon. Katara provides some measure of support, and in this AU Azula never has the energy to really push Ukano’s political career forward, and so Mai never has to leave, so Ty Lee also stays put.

Katara, again, is severely traumatized by her experiences, and to a degree feels helpless. She knows that she can’t escape and go back home. She’s resentful of Azula and particularly of the efforts to cut Katara off from her culture, but at the same time Katara ends internalizing some Fire Nation culture. Yet after a while Katara gets a sense of how toxic the environment is at the Royal Court, and she soon(after overhearing a conversation between Mai and Ty Lee which was supposed to be confidential) learns what happened to Zuko and realizes how much Azula risked in order to protect Katara, and Katara can’t help but feel intense gratitude to Azula for it. Azula also gradually becomes more and more respectful of Water Tribe culture, and Katara deeply appreciates the emphasis Azula places on Katara mastering waterbending.  Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee are also the only people in the Fire Nation who are ever consistently kind to Katara, and Katara ends up deeply bonding with each one of them, although the resulting relationships are not the healthiest. Katara eventually starts to develop a sense of how each one of them has been deeply victimized by Fire Nation culture. Azula goes to great lengths to hide her own struggles and pain from Katara, but Katara spends a lot of time with her and sometimes notices. Several years in, Katara notices some positive changes in Azula and begins to play with the idea that she can positively influence Azula so that Azula will be become a kinder and anti-imperialist Firelord.

Azula thinks Katara’s waterbending is the coolest thing ever(well, aside from firebending at least), a sentiment shared to a lesser degree by Mai and Ty Lee. Azula also thinks that learning to fight is vital, so she brings Katara along for her spars with Mai and Ty Lee. Katara makes rapid progress, particularly due to her access to many waterbending scrolls. As a result of this, and of Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee not separating, all four girls end up being significantly better combatants than they were in canon.

Mai and Ty Lee have complex reactions to Katara, but they eventually come to like and even love her. There is an element of resentment present because Katara takes up so much of the ever busy Azula’s time, but Azula forces her friends to spend time with Katara, and they end up bonding with her.  Katara’s empathy and compassion works in her favor here, especially since she rapidly develops into one of the few people who sees and appreciates them for who they are. Mai and Ty Lee also find Katara’s waterbending to be an interesting and intriguing method of combat, soon come to respect Katara’s budding combat skills, and, as people deeply unhappy with their own places in society, they find Katara’s stories of life at the south pole to be interesting. Mai has issues with Katara being a little too “motherly,” but on the other hand appreciates that Katara pays attention to Mai’s actual desires and needs.  Ty Lee sometimes finds Katara to be a little too similar to her for comfort, but also at the same time appreciates Katara’s caring side and the way she’s not reluctant to give her positive attention. Frequently Azula is too busy to join her friends, so Katara, Ty Lee, and Mai end up hanging out together. Freaks and outsiders stick together.

Azula, through her research into the Water Tribes, personal experience with Katara, and interest in Katara’s waterbending, begins to subtly yet strongly move in anti-imperialist directions and doubt Fire Nation ideology, but her transformation has scarcely begun by the time Book 1 begins. She does benefit from better relationships with her friends, though, and Katara gives her some emotional support. Meanwhile, to a lesser degree Mai and Ty Lee have had their own doubts develop about imperial ideology.

Azula tends to see her relationship with Katara mainly in terms of responsibility and duty, but she ultimately comes to fiercely love Katara.

Zuko and Iroh do their things, just like in canon.  They receive vague reports about Katara’s presence in court, but they don’t understand the significance of them.

Sokka gets badly traumatized by losing his sister and believes her to be killed by the Fire Nation. Hakoda, Bato, and the water tribe warriors also still leave to fight the Fire Nation. Sokka is absolutely dedicated to seeking vengeance on the Fire Nation, and when he accidently defrosts Aang, he sees an opportunity.

Book 1 largely plays out the same, with minor changes. I think an interesting one is that Suki ends up joining a badly understrength Team Avatar and temporally leaving her warriors behind in order to aid Avatar Kyoshi’s reincarnation with the fulfillment of his destiny.

Book 2 opens with Azula being sent to capture Zuko and Iroh. Mai and Ty Lee tag along, in part with the hope of making sure Zuko is captured without being harmed, and Azula decides to bring Katara too rather than leave her alone in Caldera.  However, the operation goes south, and Azula, Mai, Ty Lee, and Katara soon find themselves hunting the Avatar. Katara’s loyalties are about to be tested like never before…Meanwhile, Azula, Mai, and Ty Lee all have seeds of anti-imperialism growing within them, but what will it take for these seeds to blossom and give fruit? Meanwhile, Azula grapples with not only her canon trauma but also the trauma she experienced through her parentification.

[defilerwyrm]

⭐️ Bei Mir Bist Du Schön

FIC SPOILERS AHEAD!

Bei Mir Bist Du Schön on AO3

He opened his mouth to thank Essek but what came out instead was, “Deine Augen sind wunderschön.”

Essek stared at him, perfectly neutral save for the subtle rise of stark white eyebrows. “I don’t speak Zemnian,” he said, flashing his customary, placid little smile.

This is early Essek, well before c2e097, so this is a fully calculated move. That stare is him running simulations in his head, as it were, weighing his options, and he finally decides that he can learn more about Caleb if the guy thinks he doesn’t understand these little asides.

And boy did he ever just learn something juicy.

The second time, he was feeling petulant. Essek was normally a very patient and talented teacher, but there came a time when they butted heads over the best way to work a spell: Essek’s experience and Caleb’s contradicted each other, and neither was willing to admit that he was wrong because they weren’t. Caleb couldn’t have said why they were getting spirited over it. It was unlike them to lock horns this way, and the condescension chafed fiercely.

To my understanding, Wildemount never—at least post-Calamity—had a continent-spanning culture like the Roman Empire that would standardize learning across regions, and the Empire and Dynasty have utterly lacked in cultural exchange pretty much throughout their histories; so I reason that their approach to magic must be very damn different right down to the fundamentals. But, I also reason, magic is like math, in that there’s more than one way to come to a given conclusion—so the same spell cast by an Imperial mage might use different theory and somatic/verbal components with the same results.

I love fic that plays homage to cultural differences, so I figured that there must surely come a point where Caleb and Essek quibble about how to do a thing, with the crux being that they’re both right.

In a fit of pique, he muttered, “Du hast Glück, dass du abartig schön bist, denn du bist so ein Arsch.”

Essek’s head whipped up so fast that, for a moment, Caleb thought maybe he understood after all—but Essek just squinted at him without recognition and said, “I beg your pardon?”

Essek’s poker face is doing triple duty here because Caleb just said he’s hot af but also a dick, and this isn’t a sentiment Essek hasn’t heard before, but it hasn’t really gotten under his skin like it does this time.

Caleb passed a hand over his face and scratched at the beard he desperately needed to shave off. “Nothing,” he lied, “just annoyed with myself. This should be a moment of discovery, now that we know this can go either way. A door has unlocked and we’re both pulling it shut. Can we start again?”

The slip, and Essek’s reaction to it, made Caleb realize that they were both being dillweeds about the whole thing and it wasn’t going to move them forward at all.

It was—of course, of fucking course the intonation mattered. “A tonal shift,” he breathed. He took Essek by the lapels of his robe and shook him gently, and blurted out, “Ich könnte dein Gehirn küssen und dann deinen Mund.”

“What the hell is going on,” Nott squeaked at the same time as Essek chuckled almost nervously, “Caleb, I don’t—”

Hot boi damn near let the cat out of the bag right here. It’s certainly not that he specifically did not want to be smooched at all, but more that 1) Nott was RIGHT THERE so it would be mortifying, 2) he’s still very D: about physical contact and this point, and 3) he’s still very privately going “fuck fuck fuck WHY a HUMAN” about his own attraction to Caleb. There is very much a part of him that Wants That, but the rest of him is just not coping with it at all just yet.

The following morning, though, all he could think about was Dein Bett wäre besser and Essek’s careful fingers touching his face.

Both of them are fully mortified with themselves. They’re ridiculous. I see Caleb heading back to the Xhorhaus with shoulders bunched up, brow furrowed, and wide eyes glued to his own feet as his brain screams “DEIN BETT WÄRE BESSER” at him, mockingly, over and over. Slipping up and confessing your attraction to your crush is relatably horrifying (gods, I’ve been there, it’s awful) and Caleb is predisposed to beat himself up to begin with. Add in the rest of the party making a big deal over the fact that he spent the night over at Essek’s towers and you’ve got an abject storm in that little ginger head of his.

It did not help matters that no matter how much he insisted that nothing happened, the Mighty Nein were dead set on believing that he’d slept with his mentor, and they spent the next three days teasing him about it, none of them aware that he was simultaneously tormenting himself.

Okay so I try to be good and not talk shit about my own work these days, but that sentence just landed in a belly flop for me. I’m not sure it actually gets across what I’d meant, which was that Caleb was beating himself up for a different reason than what they all thought.

In the midst of a messy ambush by three of the wolf-cat eye-beasts, one of them managed to get the drop on Caleb, and it pinned him, screaming, to the ground. Its claws dug fiery punctures into either side of his chest. He thrashed, trying to get both hands up to cast, but it would be too late—his reflexes weren’t good enough. His body had never been nearly as sharp as his mind, and he was about to pay the price in the form of massive, dagger-like fangs lunging towards his throat. He screamed again, chest nearly frozen with fear, when—

Adventurers are generally made of tough stock, but I really wanted to dig into the POV of someone who’s being attacked by a terrifying cerature intent on ripping them apart. “You take 12 piercing damage and are knocked prone” is mechanical and dry; I wanted to show the full in-character implications of those mechanics.

Another fic that represents game mechanics narratively to absolutely stunning affect is Hard Mouth by road_rhythm, which I cannot recommend highly enough. I wrote Bei Mir before Hard Mouth started posting but had it been the other way around, it 100% would have been an inspiration in that regard.

He could not help but murmur, “Götter, ich bins so verschossen in dich.”

Fun fact: I got myself the book Talking Dirty German specifically for writing Caleb dialogue, and it really came in handy here. This idiom is from that book, as did abartig schön. The literal translation is “Gods, I am so shot into you,” which coming to think of it sounds a wee bit dirty but is figuratively very sappy.

Speaking of sappy….

“Das Gefühl ist Gegenseitig,” came the warm and sleepy reply.

Part of this is Essek being barely-conscious, but the bulk of it is this—and this is basically giving away the whole way the fic progresses: pretending not to know Zemnian began as a manipulation tactic to get intel, then became a game of “Let’s see how long it takes you to figure this out, smart boy” as their bond grew and Essek stopped deliberately trying to throw Caleb off, and finally when they were a couple he figured it would be cruel and pointless to keep up the ruse, especially since he’d been growing to appreciate pet names in their mother tongues.

Caleb took a deep breath, set his tea aside, and launched himself at Essek, who yelped, laughing, and danced out of his grasp. Essek led him on a merry chase around the kitchen and held out as long as he could before crying mercy at Caleb’s vicious tickling.

You know, I probably shouldn’t point this out in case my readers hadn’t cottoned onto it yet either, but it wasn’t until like a week after publishing this that I stopped and thought, “WTF happened to Essek’s teacup? Did he take the time to set it down? Did it get dropped and shatter? Did he show off and levitate it?? Did he bring it with him and get tea all over the place and himself?!” Smh…. Choose your own explanation, I guess, lmao.

The rolls were a little burnt that morning, but Caleb had no regrets.

Part of me feels like this is kind of a weak ending, but I justify it to myself by remembering how hard Caleb regretted his slip-ups over the course of the fic. He spends a good bit of copy beating himself up over them, so ultimately I think it fits, even if it kinda lacks punch.

[orime-stories]

Watcher’s Opinions on the Gods

Tagged by @yanara126 to fill this out. Thank you! ^_^

Tagging @aban-ataashi @adraveins @atomizednat @embajadora-montilyet @ganbarimaster @grandmamohawk @haledamage @luminousbathhouse @lunarowena @orokin-made @queen-scribbles @risualto @serenbach86 @serialephemera and @shimmer-like-agirl for if any of you are interested and might need anything for this fine Watcher Wednesday.

This post contains a lot of spoilers for the events of both Pillars of Eternity games below, for anybody who would prefer to skip past it.

What does Seluna think about the gods?

1. Abydon: Likes him well enough. He’s about hard work, self-improvement, and sharing your knowledge and the fruits of your labours with others, which are all good traits for a community to have. I don’t think I’m going to cover The White March in my story because it’s not flowing so naturally for me, but in game Seluna chose to restore Abydon’s memories. She was very moved to hear how hard he’d fought to protect Engwith from the others despite what it cost him.

2. Berath: Complicated. Started out with a basic respect and appreciation for the key role they have in overseeing the cycle of death and rebirth. There’s no warmth or kindness there, but it’s a necessary part of kith existence. She didn’t really appreciate them bringing Raedric back, but she’d felt so guilty over what happened with him that she blamed herself and her actions for what happened more than she blamed Berath. She’s grateful Berath saved her at the start of Deadfire, but horrified when she fully realises the implications of how beholden she now is to the god and how little choice she might be allowed as the events of the story unfold. She’s particularly terrified that Berath will use her as an unwilling instrument to end Eothas.

3. Eothas: Oh my poor girl. So she’s a priest of Eothas, and she spends most of the first game refusing to believe that he really was defeated in the Saint’s War. She confidently continues spreading his faith and reassuring everyone that everything’s fine. Then when she’s confronted with the truth in the Hall of Stars, she does not take it well. At all. Then soon after she finds out that the gods aren’t even real anyway. X_X In the end she decides that Eothas’ principles of benevolence, honesty and redemption are still principles that are worth cultivating in the world, god or no, and she finds a new rhythm for herself. Then he inhabits a giant statue that kills her and destroys the keep and community she’d spent a lot of time and love on cultivating. That hurts. A lot. So she goes chasing him through the Deadfire with extremely mixed emotions - not sure whether to rejoice at his return, fear it, or curse him for it. I’m still tangling out the orders and combinations of when all those feelings hit. But ultimately, she still loves him and what he stands for and what he’s trying to do for kith, and it doesn’t really take much convincing for her to remember and dive back into that. She hopes that they’ll all be able to live up to the faith he has in them to find a new way forward.

4. Galawain: Very uncomfortable with him. His way of survival of the fittest and at the expense of others is very far removed from her ideals of community and helping each other to survive together. She’s also nervous around / afraid of animals, so she’s honestly probably just plain frightened of him.

5. Hylea: It was all going so well until Skaen revealed that she’d been the inspiration for what happened to Aelys. Up until that point Seluna really liked Hylea and all the beauty, song and life she spread throughout the world. And she was so grateful to hear that Hylea’s followers were helping to shelter Eothasians during the Dyrwoodan purges. She accepted Hylea’s blessing to make it down to Sun in Shadow and returned the souls to their originally intended owners. But after hearing Skaen’s jibe, and in the greater context of getting fed up with the rest of the pantheon for opposing Eothas, Hylea loses a lot of her respect.

6. Magran: Very uncomfortable with her. She doesn’t agree with the way Magranites romanticise suffering as a necessary part of growing or improving and how that can easily pave the way for crueler world views. She has also had negative experiences with fire that turn her away from Magran’s whole aesthetic in general. She doesn’t appreciate that it was largely Magranites that fought Eothasians in the Saint’s War, but she’s unsure how much of that was Magran’s direct will and how much of it was just kith being awful. But then she got confirmation that the Godhammer bomb was indeed made under the god’s guidance, and also experienced first hand her attempted destruction of Eothas (and Seluna’s party as collateral) at Magran’s Teeth.

7. Ondra: It’s very complicated, but ultimately not positive. Seluna is a moon godlike, but her parents had told her and she’d always believed that she’d actually been marked by Eothas. So that was yet another existential crisis the poor girl got to face in the Deadfire when it was confirmed that she had always been Ondra’s. She’d never felt much of a connection to the god. She likes the sea well enough, but wallowing in sorrow and loss and willfully forgetting and obscuring truths doesn’t work for her at all. So when she learns the full extent of the power Ondra has over her, she is extremely uncomfortable with that. All these gods staking a claim on her soul, except the one she’d willingly give it to...

8. Rymrgand: Utterly terrified of him. His domain is the inevitable end of all things. No purpose to it, no meaning, no chances to affect change or make amends, just an end. Her usual weapons of words and kindness are utterly useless against it. The animancers accidentally sending her to his realm in Deadfire was the most scared she’d ever felt in her life. So that put an end to any chance of her continuing to pursue the Vailians as her allied faction.

9. Skaen: Extremely uncomfortable with him. She has a lot of sympathy for the beaten and downtrodden people he represents, but completely disagrees with his methods for helping them - inflicting the cruelest punishments possible on those oppressing often while destroying the oppressed too in the process. It feels like such a horrible and pointless way to end things, turning your back on every other possible avenue of communication and change that could improve things more slowly, but ultimately more stably in a way that benefits all. (This insistence that there’s always a clean and kind way out of things is absolutely a flaw just as much as it is a strength). What his followers planned to do with Aelys just makes her sick to her stomach.

10. Wael: Does not get them at all, but is comfortable enough with the understanding that she’s not supposed to. They don’t seem actively harmful? Or helpful? Might as well just not be there maybe? She doesn’t know.

11. Woedica: Actively angry towards her. She is not impressed with the Leaden Key. Or Thaos. Or that Woedica was literally stealing the souls of babies. Solely to empower herself. Which seems pretty against the “god rules”. But apparently Woedica just picks and chooses which rules she wants to follow at any given moment. Despite being the literal god of oathkeeping. Seluna is just absolutely infuriated with her cold meddling and hypocrisy, and thinks she’s potentially the most dangerous of all the gods.

[zombiequincy]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

My muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless /

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO.

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO.

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

How strictly do you follow canon?  — I’d like to think I follow canon fairly decently in regards to Giselle’s powers but then again there really isn’t much to follow. So we’ll go with a shaky ‘ehhhh’.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.  —  She’s one of the most objectively fucked up Sternritter. Her powers completely spit in the face of everything the Soul Reapers try to abide by and their cycle of life and reincarnation by basically crushing it under her heel and refusing to allow the process of death to run its course. She’s also just such a cheery and utterly irredeemable villain which is so refreshing sometimes. None of that brooding ‘woe is me my powers and situation makes me so sad’ no no no, she is here to FUCK shit up for everyone and laugh while doing it. Also the whole idea of forcing someone to fight against their will is just so supremely fucked up but always interesting to see in action. She could have singlehandedly turned the tides of the Quincy invasion if she got her hands blood on the right people and that’s a terrifying though. Also a lot of her motif and powers link closely to the sort of biblical fucked up imagery of angels that you can see in novels like Paradise Lost or Dantes Inferno or the Old Testament, that just themeatic attitude of like show no mercy even to the weak and how morals are meaningless in the face of war and if you’re doing everything in the service of god then even the most fucked up actions can be justified, so if like me, you’re a huge nerd for that shit, she is PERFECT.

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).  —  She’s one of the most objectively fucked up Sternritter. She’s annoyingly over powered in the sense that she just doesn’t die, which can really be a sticking point for some people because it just seems like there’s no threat present when she’s around. I also don’t blame anyone for being disinterested with her portrayal and character as it is in the manga since her whole identity seems to just be a shitty allusion to predatory lesbian trope and god awful transphobic jokes, so seeing those it can be easy to think that’s all there is to her character and not even want to entertain everything else she has to offer. Also the way that she treats Bambi, turns even my stomach, so I absolutely do not blame anyone who might want no interest in any of that and the implication of those scenes.

What inspired you to rp your muse?  —  (Kaiman lol) She was one of the femritters I naturally gravitated towards because of her fight with Mayuri and I fucking hate Mayuri soooo, queen rights! Also I just love characters who can like puppeteer and control others against their will, there’s something so really interesting about that power in fiction and it always gives way to tons of angst and sadness which is absolutely my shit. I also had a ton of issues with the way that Kubo presented her in canon, especially in regards to her trans identity and I kept obsessing over that and wanted to kinda push away from all those shitty moments and try to focus more on her powers and attitude as a young Quincy who was eager to join a war and murder her way up the ranks. 

What keeps your inspiration going?  —  My love for evil women. But you know, mainly music and goth aesthetic posts. Also other pieces of gothic literature and undead monster lore and mythos. If there’s a will and way, I will always find a way to bring it back to Giselle.

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO.

Do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO.

Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO.

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day?  YES / NO.

Are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO.

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO

Are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO.

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?  —  Haven’t gotten any yet but I am always open to it. I know there’s a ton of choices I’ve made in my portrayal that are open to heavy scrutiny, like making her very young contrasted against the other Sternritters, making her a serial killer, making her a self declared man eater etc etc. Even though my main goal with rp is to just have fun, I’d never want to do so at the expense and well being of others, so if anyone has some serious critiques to make about Giselle or to say that she’s making them feel uncomfortable, then it’s the absolute bare minimum for me to listen and be considerate about that criticism! 

Do you like questions which help you explore your character?  —  If I say no that makes me look like a mad woman and an asshole but like GKJLASDKDJSA look its really hard to try to explore a lot of the inner depths of a character like Giselle who just joyfully takes pleasure in others suffering. Like she’s just here to kill and eat people, trying to explore the why and how and who led her into that way of thinking and informed her deeper beliefs, high key gives me a headache. Sometimes she’s just evil and a dickhead for the sake of being an evil dickhead. I have to be in a very specific headspace and mood to want to discuss in detail her attitudes and beliefs and how certain personality traits of her came to be and even when I do that, it’s not usually public. As I write with more and more people, her views and ideals begin to reveal itself in the threads and situations so I prefer to do the exploration that way via my writing and threads. I’m always open to questions which help me explore her ideals and beliefs and reckoning with her past but because I haven’t made any plans for her to really confront or express those beliefs directly yet, it’s hard for me to explain them accurately or correctly.

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?  —  Yes! I’d never declare myself as an expert on Bleach since I learn a lot of the nitty gritty details through osmosis of people who do know more than me, so if I get something wrong or a headcanon is a little bit far fetched, I’m always open to hearing the details as to why and how I can improve it. Also a lot of my headcanons are just stupid jokes so if you have one that’s funnier, then I will always love to hear it.

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?  —  In my stride. I always say this Giselle is mainly just a goof so I don’t take it too personally if someone thinks I’m doing her wrong, half the time it’s just be making bad jokes about murder and maiming and cannibalism. There are about a hundred different ways to approach someone like Giselle and mine is FAR from being the most accurate or correct one.

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  —  I can certainly understand why considering her actions in canon and how brutal and cruel she was. She kinda is a figure made to be hated and disgusted by and in certain threads I do really lean into her more ‘evil’ side. So I’d never take it personally. 

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  —  Dear god please do it. I’m dyslexic and English technically isn’t even my first language I struggle with this VERY bad. Let me know please please PLEASE.

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?   —  I think sooo? I’ve never rushed anyone for replies, I take my own sweet time to get stuck into threads and I approach any headcanons or ideas people have for Giselle with a sense of optimism and good faith! I’m always down for some silliness but I’m always cautious about how far to go with her considering that the way she acts can be triggering in some regards so I like to think I’m both pretty careful and laid back!

That’s about it, congrats for filling out!

Tagged by:  @windstormwielding cheers my dear !! Tagging: @fleshpurifies @bazzardburner @hyouketsu @oscuras and YOU!

[cameron-malkin]

Exit Wounds || Self para.

The intrusion had been unwarranted. In the throes of a new creative process, charcoal stained hands worked painstakingly across the page as the black and white image came to fruition. Eventually leaning back to observe his work at a distance, sapphire eyes studied the drawing meticulously, critiquing every inch of his creation. There had been a recent spark of creativity within the young man, an intense level of muse unlike any he’d experienced before. 

“Open up!” A thunderous boom from an unfamiliar voice interrupted him, eliciting an eye-roll from the 28-year-old. 

“Nobody’s home!” He sing-songed in return, the snide retort rolling easily off his lips before focusing his efforts back onto the page. Diligent blue hues turned their attention towards the developing art, the delicate curvature of pencil lines distracting him from relentless knocking upon hardwood. Eventually, the culprit of such upheaval made his presence known, entering the room, “Malkin, pack your shit. You’re moving to yellow.” 

Spinning in his chair to face the intruder, a sharp comment locked and loaded on his tongue, a deep frown of annoyance etched across his features. Suddenly he was thrown into a vast abyss of confusion as he caught the tail end of the command. “Excuse me, I’m what?” Demanding repetition from the stranger, Cameron leant forward, elbows resting on his knees as two hands clasped in front of him. “What’re you on?” Was this some kind of twisted prank? The twenty-eight-year-old had to stop himself from erupting into a fit of laughter, a heavy exhale of disbelief taking its place. 

A disgruntled groan pushed through the guard’s pursed lips before reiterating simple instructions, “You’re moving. Yellow floor. Five minutes.” It irked him, the way the guard couldn’t bring himself to use any more words than necessary — the implication in his voice clear: Cameron wasn’t worth the wasted breath. A burlap sack thrown in his direction signaled the end of the conversation, coaxing a frown onto Cameron’s lips once more. Reaching out to catch the bag flung towards him, a whirlpool of thoughts swirled menacingly onward, reeling from the sudden loss of belonging the small space afforded him. 

Azure orbs glanced around the space he had occupied for the better part of five years. The walls that had once been bare were now finally brightened by few belongings, decorated with polaroids of late night adventures and inspired drawings that filled him with a sense of pride. Carefully prying each item off with delicate precision, ocean eyes gazed over the dimly lit photo of Lexus on the hood of Charles' car, a wicked smirk pulling at the corner of his lips as he recounted memories from the crisp autumn evening beyond the walls of Thornewood. 

Cameron leant against the hood of Charles’ car, cigarette in hand as smoke intertwined the cool air surrounding him, sidewalks decorated with pumpkins accompanied by the ghoulish decor that hung from every post and pillar. The awe-struck smile never faded from either of their features as they basked in their newly found freedom. One size twelve stepped in front of the other, approaching Lex before strong hands enveloped her waist. “Hey, beautiful.” He murmured in her ear, his lips moving to line a path of delicate kisses to her neck. It was an understatement, her standing there in skin-tight jeans hugging her curves in a way that made his mouth water. He’d meant for it to be a simple distraction before lifting her up onto the hood of the car, but it left him wanting more, positioning himself between her thighs. Reluctantly, he pried himself away from her open palm, desperate to grasp a fistful of his jacket. Curelian hues glided over her frame, heart heavy with the desire for this singular shared moment to stretch into eternity. The beginning of their nights together had always been the most joyful, excitement and anticipation igniting deep within his bones. “Wait, stay there,” In retrospect, to his ears, the words were more of a love-stricken plea than a seductive invitation. He recalled the burning need for the photograph, the image of it hanging on his bedroom wall too good to resist: Lexus sprawled out on the top of Charles’ car, like she owned it.

There were a multitude of reasons behind Cameron’s minimalistic style of living, chief among them that he could never afford luxury items, and the few belongings he did have lacked sentimental value. Moreover, he had lived by the belief that when he eventually left Thornewood, it would be to return to a life of poverty unable to be swayed by an abundance of possessions. He’d need nothing apart from the clothes on his back. However, it became clearer day by day that his future was morphing into something with more promise. Not only had he gained a vision of a future worth fighting for, but he'd acquired more everything. More clothes, more cologne, more cheesy trinkets — all from Lexus that he would never be able to part with. One by one, he placed them gingerly into the rucksack. Coming to terms with the fact that he clearly was unable to object to the move, a tornado of thoughts created a path of destruction as he struggled with the notion. His personal demons whispered harsh truths about the significant progression. What possible growth had occurred? He hadn’t earned this.

Incarcerated within Thornewood, the patient had watched numerous people come and go over time. Some stayed longer than others, but always worked their way through the levels eventually. Even Lexus — despite her cemented belief that she was incapable of improvement — hardly spent a year on the same floor before moving. Such progress hadn’t gone undeserved, but this transfer felt anything but justified. With an angry beast waging war inside him, Cameron knew this progression symbolized something he was not: tame. It was abundantly clear that there was a higher power at play here, an overwhelming sense of trepidation surrounding him as crystalline hues stared at the now empty room, his prized possessions slung over his back. A terrifying realisation struck him as he descended the carpeted stairs: he was unable to name the force that moved him. Who possibly could have swayed the Forresters to look the other way? And why would they? 

The walk to the new room — his room — was paved with a painfully long stretch of silence. The only twisted form of relief from the ear-splitting stillness were the perturbed thoughts occupying his mind. Cameron’s self-loathing knew no bounds, incapable of bottoming out as copious insults were hurled at him from every direction. Somewhere in the spiralling depths of his self-hatred, the notion that he would now have to occupy a space with another smacked him in the chest, eliciting an angry snarl upon impact. In a matter of seconds, the privacy he had taken advantage of on the third floor was unapologetically snatched from beneath his feet. Swallowing hard as he pushed past the outrage bubbling below the surface, the 28-year-old turned towards the guard escorting him. 

“Not to question you, your highness, but there’s got to be some sort of massive fuck up here.” A demand to talk to Charles almost surpassed tight lips, struggling to stop himself despite being intimately aware of the naivety behind such a thought. No one requested a meeting with Charles Forrester — not even Thornewood’s oldest resident. 

Deafening silence answered him, falling over the two men before abruptly stopping at a closed door on the second floor. The guard held out his hand, an unspoken demand for Cameron’s wrist, before producing a small pair of scissors to remove the last remaining shred of his existence on the red floor. For a split second, the tender skin of his sunless wrist came into view. He noted how odd it looked, almost as though he’d forgotten about the patterns of ink now exposed. The moment was, however, short lived as the garishly bright new colour was clamped onto his arm, repulsing the New Jersey native immediately. The inaccurate mark granted him new permission, throwing the lone wolf into the pasture rife with sheep. The road before him became rocky and uneven, sharp twists and jackknife turns appearing out of nowhere, leading him to a destination he was wary of approaching. 

Upon entering the new room, a grimace replaced the look of confusion he had been sporting. Uncertainty spawned a pounding between his temples as a frustrated hand flung up to rub his forehead in desperate search of relief from the growing pressure. A guttural groan escaped his clenched jaw as he flung his bag onto the bed and slammed the door behind him. The feral beast within paced the confines of his steel cage with insurmountable irritation on the rise. A clenched fist leveled with brick, a scream on the tip of his tongue as the threat of an impending collision of bone against cement loomed overhead. 

“I don’t give a shit.”

“I don’t give a shit.”

“I don’t give a shit.”

Backing away from the wall, Cameron collapsed onto the edge of the bed. His hand dropped in defeat as two lungs gasped for air, head shoved between his knees in an attempt to force himself off the ledge. 

With his gaze fixed upon unscathed knuckles, he was stunned by the distinct lack of blood. The beast locked eyes with him, nearly unrecognizable as it prowled behind the iron bars of a newfound equilibrium.

[ladyleoart]

First Time For Everything

Fandom: Marvel - Avengers {MCU} AU:  Domestic Avengers - Let’s pretend they’re in a time bubble, I just want them to be HAPPY okay! Pairing: Steve/Tony {Stony} Rating: This is a solid fucking G, basically? Sex implied Warning(s): None <3 Prompt: "Stony goes through a haunted house, Steve does bobbing for apples for the first time, Tony takes Steve trick or treating" 

For: Eric @fiction-is-my-diction also viewable on ao3!

(Note: Bucky’s halloween costume is actually inspired by this post from @dorkcoffee !! Amazing artist <3)

--

Captain America is a symbol of hope. He’s an American icon, but his reach extends beyond its shores and touches the heart of every dreamer, the fiery soul of every broken and beaten outcast, the spot buried deep in anyone who looks into the face of inequality and inhumane treatment and yearns to kick and scratch bloody stripes into their skin. He’s a hero, a role model, a mythical figure in his own right.

And he’s terrified of robot babies.

Tony can’t believe it, but it’s true - Captain America has fears, and not something so grand and vague as fascism, war, or another metaphoric big bad. His fear is the goddamn animatronic baby in the haunted house crib.

“Steve, it’s not real.”

“I know that!” He groans, fingers digging into Tony’s arm so hard it hurts.

“We can’t leave until we walk past it.”

“I know that too!” His feet seem to be glued to the spot, and the baby’s scripted routine of jerking upright and wailing resets, causing Steve to jerk and yank Tony’s arm nearly out of the socket.

“Steve,” he hisses involuntarily, and the star-spangled crybaby relents slightly, allowing Tony to roll his sore shoulder and grab his wrist instead. “Alright, come on, I’ve got you.”

A soft whimper and at first Steve’s dragging his feet through the small “nursery”, but once the baby lays back down Tony is able to pull him out the draped doorway and into a hall of mirrors.

As they wander through, Steve seems to calm down; he’s almost back to normal by the time they make it to the exit - but Tony can still feel him flinch when a short little vampire pops out for one last jumpscare. The kid must be about sixteen, but Steve glares him down like he’s Red Skull all over again; Tony can’t help but slide him a twenty to make up for what are most likely stained pants as he drags his surly boyfriend across the lawn of the haunted house.

Steve is dead silent - pun intended - and Tony shoulder checks him gently. “They do say it’s the scariest haunted house on the east coast.”

“I am never doing this ever again,” Steve snaps, but the pout says he’s more embarrassed than angry.

“Hey, at least that kid has a story to tell about the time he almost made Captain America cry.”

“Oh shut up.”

 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They show up to the Halloween party fashionably late - a quick pit stop to change into their costumes turned into Tony’s suggestive “Trick or Treat” implications which turned into a quick tumble in the sheets. Eventually, Steve manages to get into his cowboy costume without Tony prying pieces of it back off, even if it means he has to yank Tony’s grim reaper hood down over his entire face.

There’s music playing and lights pulsing when they finally make it into the party, which is conveniently located three floors under their penthouse apartment in Stark Tower.

“The party’s at your house and you show up late?” Rhodey greets them with a grin, an arched brow, and two glasses of scotch, one of which he hands off to Tony while initiating their routine banter. He’s making the most of his robotic leg braces and has committed to being a cyborg for the party, complete with glowing red eye-piece.

“Oh, you know traffic always sucks.”

“You know,” Natasha interrupts, appearing from seemingly nowhere to stand directly beside them. “This is the boring business equivalent of a Dad Joke.”

Tony looks horrified. “You take that back, I am funny.”

“Maybe the first time, if I’m being generous.”

“Hey, Nat,” Steve interjects, casually sliding between them to steer her away from a sputtering Tony and laughing Rhodey. “Where are Sam and Bucky?”

“Just arrived to the party and you’re already heading to the time out corner?”

“The what?”

She grins. “That’s what I call the corner where they’re inevitably snarling and glaring at each other.”

He snorts. “Guess I better go make sure they don’t start another brawl.”

“Nice costume by the way,” she gives him a once-over. Natasha herself is wearing what can only be called a combat ballerina costume. Grey tights and steel-toed black boots, a fluffy pink tutu and bedazzled bodice, hair in a tight bun and war paint streaked on her cheeks.

He can’t help but laugh. “You too.”

She salutes him with her glass of vodka and a dangerous smirk.

He finds his two best friends right where Nat suggested - staring each other down in a little corner lounge space. The armchairs are plush and they’re sprawled in relaxed poses, but the tension in the air does nothing to suggest comfort - in fact, the chairs seem to have been yanked out of place so they can stare unblinking over their bottles of beer. Sam is decked out in what he calls “modern warlock regalia” which is really just a fancy, fitted charcoal gray suit and a velvet magenta duster, both dripping with chains and jewels. Bucky, true to form, has gone the lazy route with his costume. He’s wearing a blousey black shirt with loose sleeves that has a laced front undone to mid-torso, tucked into tight black pants and tall boots with several belts and a red sash.

“Are you a prince, or a pirate?” Steve interrupts their staredown brightly.

“Pirate,” Bucky spits, wiggling his many-ringed fingers and taking a long swig of Sam Adams’ Octoberfest without breaking eye contact.

“Alright, that’s enough,” Steve frowns sternly. “This is a party and we are here to have fun. No more pissing contest, ya hear me!”

“Aw, fine.” Sam is the first to break and cave to societal convention. “I know what to do!”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Bucky is scowling and Sam is grinning and Steve is wary, but Thor enthusiastically grabs them all in a big bear hug as they approach the bucket of water.

“Bobbing for apples?” Bucky’s brow is arched sharply as he squirms away from the embrace, but his relaxed stance betrays his interest.

“On Asgard we call it epli grípa,” Thor explains. “And it is a great game of sport.”

“I saw Thor carrying in the bucket,” Sam explains excitedly. “My cousins and I used to love bobbing for apples as kids.”

“Y’know,” Steve muses aloud, “I don’t think I ever did bob for apples.”

“Wait what?” Bucky frowns. “I did.”

Steve smiles wryly. “I think too many dunks in the school toilet turned me off the concept.”

Sam spins to look at him, incredulous. “You got swirlies?”

“There’s a name for those?”

“Oh yeah,” Tony grins, sliding up behind them and wrapping an arm around Steve’s waist. “I had my fair share, being the misunderstood rich genius that I was.”

Rhodey snorts. “You were a smart-ass punk and everyone could see it.”

“Same thing,” he waves a hand dismissively. “All geniuses are inherently misunderstood.”

“Now!” Thor grins. “Will the Captain be the first to…bob?”

He pauses, and Tony nudges him. “Go on then, Cowboy. Reclaim your honor.”

“Reclaim his honor?” Bucky frowns.

“Don’t you dare!” Steve snaps.

Tony smirks. “If you can catch the apple within three tries, I take the secret……to the grave.”

Natasha, passing by with Pepper and Darcy and a plate of snacks, groans. “Oh, reaper puns? Now it’s getting worse.”

“You shut up, you,” Tony points at her sternly, shaking his scythe, and she sticks out her tongue.

“Fine,” Steve declares, pulling attention back to himself. “I’ll accept your challenge.”

“When have you not accepted a challenge?” Bucky mutters.

Thor claps firmly, grinning broadly. “Yes!”

“I kinda wanna hear the story,” Sam wonders aloud, and Tony winks.

Steve is focused on the tub of water like it hold the secrets of the universe, eyebrows furrowed with concentration.

It’s like watching a blind dog try to find its water dish in the dark. He’s flailing and pecking at the water like a chicken, and Tony Is trying so hard not to pee himself laughing. In the end he goes past three attempts with no success, a fact which seems to drive him further out of spite. Steve is nearly submerging his entire head at this point, and eventually Bucky and Tony have to pull him back by the arms - with an apple clutched firmly in his teeth.

“Good job babe,” Tony smiles, pulling the apple free and taking a bite. “I’m still telling the story though.”

Steve groans, proud grin falling into a resigned expression. “I knoooow….”

So Tony gets the treat in the end.

[theperidotshade]

hamelin-born replied to your post “distressedherbalist replied to your post: I have...”

Ardyn is playing games with both sides. No - no, Ardyn is playing THE Game. The Great Game, and he's doing it /masterfully/. How long, do you think, before Regis et al realize that Ardyn is the most DANGEROUS politician they've ever encountered?

And - well. Is this the first glimpse they have of Niflheim's internal unrest?

He is!  He is doing at least a third of it purely for his own amusement, but it’s all very, very calculated.

They have suspicions from the moment Ardyn starts manipulating the other Niflheimr envoys, but it really hits home in the immediate aftermath of the assassination attempt, when Ardyn, with complete unconcern, leverages an attempt on his own life against the people standing in the way of his goals.  It’s disconcerting and kind of awe-inspiring, and absolutely terrifying when they have a moment to let it sink in.

It’s not the first glimpse, necessarily, just the one they actually pay attention to.  Niflheim’s official reports and military maneuvers have been their spies’ priorities, and the Imperial Court’s official stance on the unrest up to this point has been ‘ignore it, except when they speak out directly against us’.  So they have a vague idea that there’s some sort of internal problem, but no sense of the scale of it.  But the implication that Niflheim is no longer exporting goods because all of them are needed internally due to scarcity of laborers and resources—that’s huge, and the Lucians are taking the hints they’ve received before seriously now.

[jessiegoesabroad]

waste management in a world heritage site and bubble tea on every corner > Hoi An & Ho Chi Minh, Viet Nam

coming to you live from a cafe in the old Medina of Rabat, Morocco! forgive me for this being a little late, but here we are cause i just could not delay my sharing my excitement about how much i love love love Viet Nam any longer!

for our last couple stops in Viet Nam we were in Hoi An for about 4 days and HCM city for about 3. Hoi An is a UNESCO World Heritage site on a river delta on the central coast of VN. We stayed along one of the rivers, which always became filled with lanterns at night. Being in the central part of VN and then the south near the delta was veeeery warm, but just spectacular!

One of the most memorable moments I had was an interview I conducted for my term-long research project with the daughter of two of our guest speakers, Clara. My term project, a comparative study of the education systems in all of the countries I visit (including the US), was perfect to discuss with Clara. She has spent many years in the Vietnamese public school system in multiple cities before going to her international school in Hoi An. She had many criticisms of the general education system, but showed me a more holistic view of what the curriculum actually is like, and how it is applied with the students. I learned about some really surprising similarities between the VN and US school systems, like the emphasis on math, but the differences in how that is implemented. Clara showed me more evidence to something that I had already suspected; that the government’s ideals and what they want for their children not only determine their immediate school experience, but transitively also their futures. This is only a little terrifying, as I look back to home to see my corrupt and oligarchical government back home in the US. However, it also gives me hope, because (and I say this veeeery optimistically) with good policy and government representatives looking to progressive sustainable education systems, we can give our kids the better future they deserve. Clara and I talked about this, and her powerful views on what makes a healthy classroom, a lot.

In addition to spending time in the classroom in Hoi An, our incredible country coordinator Phuong set up an awesome site visit for us where we got the chance to discuss waste management with one of the leaders in the sanitation sector in Hoi An. We visited a wonderful organic farm amidst rice paddies and some temples outside the main city area of Hoi An. They support the local economy, supply locals with fresh produce, and make their own safe pesticides with a mix of teas and vinegar! The waste management director showed us all around, and even had us go on a little boat ride near the farm. With the director we talked about how Hoi An is really setting a positive example for the rest of VN by getting communities involved in practices like composing and recycling, which in turn benefits a lot of the agricultural land that surrounds the immediate city. A lot of what our group talked about was the implications of why this happens - to benefit the tourists and bring in more revenue? For simply the good of the city and its people? A lot of my group members thought the former, but the perspective of the waste management director came seemed to come from the latter. Either way, seeing communities come together for a cause is heartwarming and does indeed set a great example for the rest of the world. Sustainability is realistic and very possible!

Not going to lie, I didn’t get to see a whole lot of HCM City while we were here for a few days. I got pretty ill and was resting a lot of the time. Rest assured, the excellent health care and abundance of love and care I received from Phuong got me better super quick. I feel all better now! Pro tip - if you are ever struck down by a stomach infection AND period cramps, fast food pho and mint tea will be a perfect cure :) however, I did go on plenty of walks especially in the evenings when I was feeling more up to it, and would walk all around the plazas and the river we were situated near and got a little taste of the city. HCM city, the former Saigon, is the most populated city in VN and it certainly feels like it! In a way, it felt like my own little slice of heaven because bubble tea is easier to acquire than ever as there’s one on nearly every corner, it feels like! Our last day, one of my close friends Riley and I managed to find some of the most amazing coconut coffee in the world before we hopped on our plane to Dubai, then Casablanca.

I could not possibly finish my last VN blog post without talking about Phuong! The amount that I have learned from her, in and out of the classroom, is definitely more than I can express. Phuong has spent time in both the VN and USA school systems, with a history in a lot of civil society programs in VN. Currently she works as in education freelance and also as a professional photographer! She traveled with us every single place we went in Viet Nam, and organized everything from where we stayed and how we got there to every single guest speaker and professor and site visit. We would not have had nearly the same program with anyone else. This past month has been nothing short of life changing and that has definitely been made by Phuong! Not to mention, she took me to the clinic every time I had to go to the doctor! I am in awe of how committed she was to our group - all with the utmost inspiring compassion, dedication, and thoughtfulness. Everyone back at the Rock, don’t worry, I am in good hands!!

All in all, (and y’all who know me know I am sappy as heck so let this last bit come as no surprise) everything about being here feels just right. Being abroad feels just wonderful. I feel like so much of my education has been building to this and I feel liberated by how much I am learning and how open and happy I feel. I definitely am living in my yellow zone all the time, and learning and pushing myself a ton because of it, but man am I feeling good and feeling lucky to be here. I am learning about what I am passionate about, and getting the chance to learn from people who have really changed my life and my perspective. Viet Nam is just amazing - my vocabulary isn’t big enough to express my love for this country! I know I will find my way back here. :)

Get ready to hear all about my incredible Moroccan homestay and the wonders of being in the desert!!!

agapé, hugs,

jessie 

outside a temple in the middle of some rice paddies in Hoi An

my friend Jack and I at the organic farm in Hoi An! he is the biggest Oasis fan ever!

in traditional boats on the river in Hoi An!

Riley and his INSANE coconut coffee! a local delicacy!!

my friend Maggie on the plaza in beautiful HCM!

[alamble23]

It’s Tuesday, doing my Timeless re-watch thang:

I’ll be posting updates during the commercial breaks.  

First off: this episode takes place one week after my fourth birthday, so I’m taking it as a personal shoutout to 4-year-old me. :)

As it has been all season, Timeless is very topical with this cold open of John Hinckley Jr. writing his confession letter to Jodie Foster. This dialogue was pulled straight from the actual letter.  The more things change, the more they stay the same.

Is this the first time we’ve ever seen Denise and Michelle’s son Mark? We’ve seen Olivia a couple of times. 

Rufus is currently in the lead for the title of Worst Bunker Boyfriend, and good on Jiya for calling him out.

Aw, seeing our OG Time Trio together, making breakfast, makes me happy. 

Lucy watches Real Housewives?  Does the bunker get satellite?

Seriously, how is it possible that Rufus never ONCE mentioned Jiya’s visions in the entire six weeks he and Wyatt were stuck in the bunker? OG Time Trio, I love you, but you guys are FAILING at friendship lately. 

Wyatt and Lucy in sync about The Alamo is everything.  

A+++++ use of Hall & Oates in the transition to 1981.Kiss On My List is an excellent song, and very appropos for our two couples.

Baby Bear Jiya’s a bit of a klepto, and Brother Bear Wyatt seems vaguely disapproving of her additional five-finger discounts? I need more of those two interacting. 

Light bulb moment for Wyatt! The fact that Wyatt groks to Rittenhouse’s plan immediately makes me happy. The boy has brains, he just forgets to USE THEM sometimes.

Wyatt and Lucy’s eye contact when Lucy realizes the implications of eliminating Agent Christopher in the past is so significant. Those two say a lot with minimal dialogue.

Really, Flynn? Why ya gotta be an asshole?

Ha, Wyatt was a fan of Magnum, P.I.! SAME, Wyatt. When I was little, I would make my mom laugh by imitating Tom Selleck’s eyebrow lift.

Wyatt taking charge is my jam.

Cagney & Lacey!

Families, yo.  We love our moms, but all of these ladies have fraught relationships with them.

This fight scene in the hospital elevator is INSANELY BADASS choreography and beautifully shot. I’ve watched it five or six times already and I still can’t figure out if that was actually Matt Lanter doing the backflip off the wall. Given that he and Annie Wersching did the entire fight sequence in 2x05 without stunt doubles, it wouldn’t surprise me if it were. 

Where the heck did Wyatt and Rufus take the sleeper agent? Did they somehow sneak him downstairs to the boiler room of the hospital?

Oh dear, Wyatt’s ditched the jacket and is rolling up his cuffs. SHIT IS ABOUT TO GO DOWN.

I swear, I thought everyone on the team knew that Denise had a wife and kids, but apparently not? Connor does, and surely Jiya and/or Rufus could have easily hacked her NSA file?

Jiya, incidentally, is practically a natural at this stuff.  A quick thinker, our girl is.

Well, except for the fact that she keeps slipping modern slang into her speech.

I need to re-watch “Hollywoodland” (such a trial, I know!) because I totally don’t remember how long Jiya’s dad has been dead.

Dude, Carol’s doing the recruiting PERSONALLY? #WorstMomEver

Uh, Wyatt, you’re Special Forces, surely you know from painful experience that “enhanced interrogation techniques” don’t get usable intel out of suspects.

Also, how old is this sleeper that he got plucked from 2018 with a wife and two kids, and has spent TWELVE YEARS in the past? Early 40s maybe?

I still feel like Rittenhouse really didn’t think this sleeper agent plan through very well. 

Denise’s story about her father’s murder is equal parts devastating and inspiring. 

Flynn’s still an asshole.  Denise has a point. This whole conversation is just sad. Anyone who’s lost a loved one can relate.

Back in the Hospital Boiler Room of Death, Wyatt and Rufus are having a necessary conversation about what to do with the sleeper agent. And for all of you freaking out about the possibility of having to leave someone behind in the past, LISTEN TO RUFUS CAREFULLY.

Sleeper agent pulls the Ace from his sleeve about the second sleeper - his brother. 

Lucy and Jiya pull a MAJOR Hail Mary by showing Denise the flash drive.

Guys, Karen David is just SO BRILLIANT in this episode.  I checked out of Once Upon a Time before she joined up, but she was so much fun in Galavant. I’ve said this before but it bears repeating: the casting team on Timeless hits a goddamned home run with the guest cast almost every week.  And they definitely nailed it with our core cast.  

Also, Robert Duncan’s score in this scene of Denise hanging out with her family is so beautiful.  

Basically, everyone involved in this show is operating at the top of their games every week. 

Holy jebus, Wyatt and Rufus went full-on Get Out on the sleeper’s bro.  Overkill maybe? (pun totally intended)

So Wyatt essentially grandfather-paradoxed himself onto the team? I have thoughts.

Leftovers from Denise’s mom are probably better than anything else this crew can scrounge up for food. 

Denise takes what could have been a terrifying situation - knowing her own future - and turns it into a positive.

By contrast, Rufus is still pretty freaked out. But he loves Jiya, and Jiya loves him, and those two are just the BEST.

The infamous journal. I posted thoughts about this yesterday, so I won’t expound upon it here. Suffice to say, I think Flynn is not telling Lucy everything.

Clearly, not only does the bunker have a great cable package, it has excellent wifi as well.

I hate this whole scene.  Saw too many spoilers, knew it was coming, hate it, hate it, HATE IT. 

Some final thoughts: Sakina Jaffrey was as advertised this week.  She’s great in this role, which could have easily turned into your basic law-enforcement functionary/occasional adversary to our Time Team, but the character has really evolved into the Mama Bear we all know and love.

I am a little disappointed with Wyatt’s origin story. I was just hoping for something a little more substantive, I guess.  I am glad that it ended up not having anything to do with either Rittenhouse or Jessica, though.

The promo: I have some predictions about next week’s finale, but I’ll roll those up separately.  Suffice to say, the stills that rolled out tonight are MAJOR.

[aion-rsa]

DuckTales Season 3 Episode 14 Review: The Split Sword of Swanstantine!

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

This DUCKTALES review contains spoilers.

I had a grin on my face from the start of this DuckTales episode to the end. The premise of this outing was a winner from the jump; the family all-splitting up to find three different pieces of the titular split sword of swanstantine.  It’s a simple “find the macguffin” story that could have been routine but DuckTales has its characters to fall back on. The team behind the show have done so much work developing these characters over the last three seasons that simply watching them in these “mini-ventures” was a pure delight. 

Webby and Dewey was a likely pairing which the show has used time and again but the added element of action out of a video game let us see different sides of them. The added complication of the two being functionally blind lead to some fantastic interplay, with Webby unsure how to proceed without sizing up the situation and Dewey wildly leaping into everything. It also gave us the best quotes of the episode which you’ll find in the quote section below. To the DuckTales writers, having Dewey add his name to everything is one of your best jokes and it never fails. Please keep using it.

Louie and Violet was an unexpected pairing to be sure but one that produced fantastic results. The layers of story and character in this mini-venture were rich, with the implication that Louie’s lying has somehow reached across the world. That’s perfect for him but then seeing it called out and finally having to live up to those boasts? That challenged him and it’s in that kind of challenge that the three of the plots in this episode had depth despite their short length. 

Like Webby earlier with her usual action hero strategy, when Louie’s in his comfort zone (lying) no one can touch him. Here though he’s backed into a corner and, though Violet saves him, realizes that eventually all these lies can come back to hurt him. Of course Louie pushes it to the back of his mind for now but Violet makes it clear, there’s power in truth and actually being able to do the things you boast about. Louie is going to have to find a new go-to strategy if he doesn’t want to be downing more deadly foods in the future.

Pairing up Lena with Huey was an unexpected break from the usual Webby/Lena/Violet team and it produced fantastic results. When the two are confronted by Steelbeak, Lena manages to stop time (a great display of her magical powers) and Huey’s first thought is to run infinite simulations on how to get out of the situation. It’s the perfect Huey plan that his brothers would just roll their eyes at, but Lena, being a relative outsider, can see deeper than that with the help of her powers. We learn that Huey keeps his pure emotions locked up inside his mind, terrified they’ll get in the way of his thinking. This is a huge revelation for the character that makes me love him even more. As much as Huey likes to portray himself as the wiser and sensible one of the group, he does have wild emotions like his brothers. He’s just ashamed of them. There’s a lot I could read into here but the thing that stands out most is he takes an enormous amount pride in his more analytical side. He looks down on his more emotional brothers and is afraid that, if his wild side comes out, he’d have no leg to stand on. He’d be the type of person he always complains about… and secretly fears. It’s a rich bit of characterization made all the better by Lena imparting lessons she’s picked up over the course of the show. That you can’t ignore the parts of yourself you don’t like or are afraid of. You have to embrace them because they’re who you are. Locking them away will come back to hurt you later on… or at least cause weird dreams of having looooooooong legs. Is every bit of Huey characterization going to revolve around that joke in my eyes? Yes, yes it will.

Watching Huey attack Steelbeak was intense but it underscored an important point. You don’t just give yourself up to the sides of your personality you don’t like. Turning into a raging monster is not a good thing. Instead, you blend it into yourself. You adapt the parts of yourself you may not like for good. In Huey’s case it was defeating Steelbeak with a calm determination. It was still Huey, just with a little more take charge to him. Hopefully we see more of this in the future.

What a joy of an episode. Just a solid outing all around. Even Rockerduck, who I haven’t been the biggest fan of, was fine here. As usual there were many great details, like the Glomgold poster warning, “DO NOT ACCEPT CHECKS FROM THIS MAN.” Violet and Lena still being in their pajamas because Scrooge dragged the kids out on the adventure was a genius reveal after his opening exposition. The “cheetahs or cheaters” line shows how much fun the team behind this show has in even the smallest of moments.

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This was one of DuckTales’ breeziest episodes yet, the three mini-venture” plots the perfect way to show off a large group of characters at once. I hope the show uses this kind of structure again, especially so more of DuckTales‘ large ensemble cast can be seen again. DuckTales is great television and I hope it runs a long time so we can get more episodes like this.

DuckTales Quotes To Make Your Life Better

-“Consider your treasure hunt officially F.O.W.L.ed up.”

-“Prepare to get Ctrl Alt Dew-leted!” -“Try something!” (This one is all in Violet’s delivery, which was awe-inspiring.)

The post DuckTales Season 3 Episode 14 Review: The Split Sword of Swanstantine! appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[ewh111]

2017 Annual List of Favorite Film Experiences

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

With each passing year, I find it harder to keep up with new release films, as well as the growing queue of ones on my “To See” list. On the other hand, it feels like quality films are sequestered till the end of the year (nothing against summer blockbusters, but with a few exceptions, many are forgotten by the time you get back to your car) and the growing appeal and abundance of quality television fostered by its broader canvas for in-depth storytelling and character development is another distraction. 

But that brings me to one of my favorite things about the holiday season in Los Angeles. The last six weeks or so of the year is filled with many appealing options as films jockey for exposure ahead of the awards season. And I have a great deal of appreciation and gratitude (and a bit of jealousy) for the many artists and others who have the passion to make these visions come to life for us to enjoy.

All the best for a wonderful 2018 and hope that you get a chance to see some of the films below that moved me in some way, sometimes filling me with emotion or awe, or provoking long-lasting thoughts, or just trigger the desire to re-experience and see it again. So, here they are, in no particular order.

Cheers, Ed

P.S.–I’ve gotten many requests to also review favorite meals of the year, so that might come in another post. :)

Indelible Coming of Age Tales

Call Me By Your Name — Northern Italy, summer, 1983. Having read the André Aciman novel, this was my most anticipated film of 2017. And it did not disappoint. This beautifully told and lushly shot coming of age romance features a remarkable and revelatory (and perhaps best of 2017) performance by newcomer Timothée Chalamet (also in Lady Bird), who achingly captures the universal yearning, passion, heartache, and torment of first love. Kudos also to Armie Hammer and director Luca Guadagnino. While many moments stand out, including the empathetic and compassionate speech by father Michael Stuhlberg (also in Shape of Water) that is the dream of every LGBT kid, it’s the minutes-long reactive close-up on Chalamet as the credits roll and song of yearning plays that devastatingly endures. My favorite of 2017.

Lady Bird — Sacramento, 2002. A semi-autobiographical coming of age in the suburbs tale featuring the humorous, turbulent, and affecting relationship between mother and daughter by Greta Gerwig in her directorial debut. With a fabulous performance by Saoirse Ronan as the head-strong teen who calls herself Lady Bird, a terrific Laurie Metcalf as her mom, and HW alum Beanie Feldstein ’11 as her best friend, this is the rare comedy that is smart, witty, and endearing.

Compelling Period Piece True Stories 

Dunkirk — Dunkirk, France, 1940. A visually and viscerally compelling piece of filmmaking about the miraculous evacuation of 300,000 British troops from the doomed beach at Dunkirk, masterfully crafted by director Christopher Nolan via three intertwined timeframes (a week on the beach, a day by sea, and an hour in the air) that intersect and fold back and ultimately, come together in the end. 

The Post — Washington, DC, 1971. Spielberg + Streep + Hanks = a highly timely and relevant telling of the Washington Post’s saga to publish the Pentagon Papers. Resonant on so many levels with urgent themes of today—the need for a free press, the role of women in a man’s world, and a judicial branch independent from an overreaching executive branch—all told with briskly entertaining and thrilling pace. 

All the Money In The World — UK/Italy, 1973. I’ll admit that I was initially attracted to this pic to see how director Ridley Scott erased Kevin Spacey and recast Christopher Plummer in the role of billionaire J. Paul Getty and reshot major portions of his film six weeks before its release date. Hats off to him for pulling off a very engaging thriller depicting the notorious kidnapping of Getty’s grandson. Michelle Williams is spot-on as the mother who goes toe-to-toe with her infamously frugal father-in-law who refuses to pay ransom for her child. 

Dark Master Works By An Irish Playwright and a Black Comedian 

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri — Ebbing, MO, present day. Loved this very dark dramedy whose story emanates from a tragic event in a small town. There’s plenty of levity and wonderfully drawn characters via Martin McDonagh’s clever screenplay that mixes revenge, redemption, and moral ambiguity, featuring a trio of tremendous performances by raging mother of deceased raped daughter Frances McDormand, small town police chief and target of McDormand’s ire Woody Harrelson, and racist, violent, alcoholic mama’s boy police officer Sam Rockwell. 

Get Out — Suburban countryside, present day America. A creepy, twisted, funny, scary, and subversive version of “Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner” crossed with a little bit of “Invasion of the Body Snatchers” for the post-Obama era. A brilliant, provocative, and unnerving nexus of sophisticated horror, comedy, and extremely biting social satire by Jordan Peele in his directorial debut.

Strange and Untraditional Love Stories 

Phantom Thread —London, circa 1950s. I love Paul Thomas Anderson, and he’s made one strange but riveting movie here. A gorgeous Jonny Greenwood score swings from elegantly jazzy to intensely haunting, setting the mood for this darkly humorous film featuring hard to describe relationships (I hesitate to call it a love story) between an obsessively demanding and fastidious fashion designer (Daniel Day-Lewis supposedly in his last film role), his muse, and his ever-lurking sister/business partner and their respective emotional/psychological (and ultimately perverse) gamesmanship. And one may not listen to water-pouring or toast-buttering, or mushroom omelet eating in the same way again. 

The Shape of Water — Baltimore, circa 1962. Mix in a large dose of Cold War thriller and Creature from the Black Lagoon, plus a little Busby Berkeley, and you either get a political allegory (marginalized “others” whether mute, black, gay, or non-human vs. the Man) or romantic fairy tale. Leave it to Guillermo del Toro to bring us the more “romantic” one in this strange love stories category, an oddly beautiful and enchanting interspecies romance between two mute and isolated beings, one a cleaning woman (a wonderful Sally Hawkins) and the other a Creature From the Black Lagoon-inspired merman kept in a top secret government facility. Arguably, the “monster” in this story is the intensely sadistic government agent played with gusto by Michael Shannon. 

Bizarre Truth Is Stranger Than Fiction Tales 

I, Tonya —  Portland, OR, 1994. A stellar Margot Robbie plays the hard scrabble, trailer-trash, and ultimately disgraced Olympic figure skater Tonya Harding in this unbelievably crazy but true story of her life leading up to the infamous incident before the 1994 Winter Olympics. Told in zippy mockumentary style that is fun to watch, Allison Janney as her zany, abusive mother leads a supporting cast of inept characters involved in Tonya’s dysfunctional life. Directed by Craig Gillispie who also directed the offbeat gem, Lars and the Real Girl. 

The Disaster Artist — Hollywood, 2003. Another bizarre, but true real life story about the enigmatic writer/director Tommy Wiseau who made one of the most absurdly bad films ever that eventually turned into a cult classic (The Room). Humorously portrayed by James Franco, who also directed this offbeat but unexpectedly poignant movie about making a movie, though it’s ultimately more about the importance of friendship, having dreams, and America’s fascination with celebrity and movies. (And the side-by-side comparison of scenes from the actual The Room and recreations in Franco’s film are hysterical.)

Docs About Felines and Cheating Russians 

Kedi — Yes, this a documentary about cats, but it’s not just about cats. Rather it’s a meditative and heartwarming look at the community of felines that inhabit the streets of Istanbul, delving into their centuries-long symbiotic relationship with humans in the old city. The city is teeming with cats that are neither feral or domestic, each with different personalities and lives they share with the people they adopt. And therein lies the heart of this film, as the locals share their bonds and therapeutic experiences with these complex creatures, ranging from the mundane to the profound. 

Icarus – Putin + mysterious deaths + performance-enhancing drug conspiracy = A fascinating and crazy documentary that plays like a spy thriller. It starts out as an odd personal experiment by the filmmaker/amateur cyclist mimicking Lance Armstrong’s doping regimen, but through sheer dumb luck and serendipity, he develops a friendship with Gregory Rodchenkov, the affable, eccentric, and charismatic camera-loving head of Russia’s Anti-Doping Lab…and, as it turns out, the country’s mastermind behind its decades-long state-sponsored doping program. It then becomes a terrifying race to uncover the world’s biggest sports conspiracy, implicating everybody including the Russian president (resulting in the NY Times exposé) while trying to save whistle-blower Rodchenkov’s life from the clutches of Putin. 

Docs about Life and Death 

Obit. —While it may sound morbid, this behind-the-scenes look at the NY Times’ obituary staff writers is enlightening and fascinating, and in fact, quite lively (even its peek into the “morgue,” the paper’s clipping archive). Beyond celebrities and notables, who makes the editorial cut in the pages of the NY Times obit section? And how does one get appropriately celebrated in death, warts and all. Now you can find out.   

Chasing Coral – A wake-up call to the accelerating world-wide death of entire coral reef ecosystems by “coral bleaching.” This remarkably emotional doc follows a team of biologists, including a self-proclaimed “coral nerd” in a race against time to document this die-off with powerful visual evidence, and the result is an inspirational eco drama that moves you to act before it’s too late. 

Others Worth Mentioning 

Baby Driver (the soundtrack and editing alone are worth the thrilling 112 minutes of this stylish heist story about a young getaway driver); It (I don’t generally like horror films, but this retelling of Stephen King’s classic was one of the most engaging and well told of its genre); Star Wars: The Last Jedi (my favorite of the series); Loving Vincent (every frame of the film was hand-painted in the style of Van Gogh); Mudbound; Spider-Man: Homecoming (loved Tom Holland as the new Peter Parker); Beach Rats; The Big Sick; War for the Planet of the Apes;The Only Living Boy in New York; Wonder Woman; Spielberg; Battle of the Sexes; Stronger 

In the Queue

Coco, Darkest Hour, Detroit, Film Stars Don’t Die In Liverpool, Downsizing, Molly’s Game, Florida Project, Victoria and Abdul.

Binge-Worthy Television

13 Reasons Why, Stranger Things 2, The OA, Mindhunter, Big Little Lies, Grace and Frankie 

Trailers

All the Money in the World: https://youtu.be/KXHrCBkIxQQ

Call Me By Your Name: https://youtu.be/Z9AYPxH5NTM

Chasing Coral: https://youtu.be/b6fHA9R2cKI

The Disaster Artist: https://youtu.be/cMKX2tE5Luk

Dunkirk: https://youtu.be/F-eMt3SrfFU

Get Out: https://youtu.be/sRfnevzM9kQ

I, Tonya: https://youtu.be/OXZQ5DfSAAc

Icarus: https://youtu.be/qXoRdSTrR-4

Kedi: https://youtu.be/w9fwhVx9zR0

Lady Bird: https://youtu.be/cNi_HC839Wo

Obit.: https://youtu.be/BgpMNerK9cU

Phantom Thread: https://youtu.be/xNsiQMeSvMk

The Post: https://youtu.be/nrXlY6gzTTM

The Shape of Water: https://youtu.be/XFYWazblaUA

Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri: https://youtu.be/Jit3YhGx5pU

[aidenwaites]

Still Breathing

A short little fic I wrote earlier inspired by this post I saw yesterday. Enjoy.

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She didn’t know that her comms hadn’t gone out over Alchera.

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The Shadow Broker's lair was much less.. dark that it had been when Shepard had helped Liara take it. Liara's influence was obvious; there was more lighting, and the windows that looked out into the constant storm on the planet Hagalaz had open shutters, and the overall atmosphere felt less like an overbearing and threatening lair of the shadow broker and like something much more welcoming- but maybe that was just the obvious lack of a yahg hellbent on ensuring their deaths. Liara had kept herself busy with trading intel and keeping a tight network of spies in the past month, and they hadn’t had much time to talk since taking the base. It seemed strange, to see her in such a position, but Liara seemed comfortable where she was. 

     They sat together, watching the storm rage outside, and their conversation had long since lapsed into a companionable silence. Shepard cast a sideways glance at Liara. She'd come to visit for a last time before she went into Alliance custody, and it seemed strange that Liara had so little to say on the matter. It meant, after all, that the Reapers were closer than they could hope. 

      "I really am glad you're back, you know." Liara looked up at Shepard and smiled. "I know I must have said that at least twenty times now, but it still doesn't feel real. I listened to you die in my nightmares for two years, and then.." "Listened to me die?" Shepard asked, turning to her. "What do you mean? I didn’t even think anyone but Joker had seen me after I was pulled from the Normandy.” "No one's told you?" Liara looked at Shepard and shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "Shepard.." She hesitated. "..Your comms didn't go off when you died." Shepard opened her mouth to ask what she meant, then paused, realizing the implications behind Liara's words. Her comms hadn't gone off. She recalled the moments of her death with unease. She didn’t remember them in detail, but she remembered the burning in her lungs and her throat, the taste of bile on her tongue, the way her vision dimmed as she caught a glimpse of the Normandy being torn apart. She remembered clutching at her throat, at her helmet, trying desperately to close whatever hole was leaving her vulnerable to empty space. She looked away from Liara.“You all heard me die?" "Yes. It was.. oh, Shepard, it was awful. We saw the escape pod leave, and we thought you were safe, and then.." Liara looked pale. "It was the worst thing I've ever heard. Ashley tried to call out to you, I think, but you were just.. choking. Gasping for air. At one point it sounded like you'd tried to speak but I couldn't make it out. It got worse the longer it went on. You became.. quiet. Instead of gasping you were just whimpering. You sounded terrified." Shepard turned back to see tears in Liara's eyes. She reached over and laid a hand on her arm. "Liara.. I'm so sorry." "No, Shepard, it wasn’t your fault.” She shook her head. “Honestly,  the worst part might have been finding Joker." Shepard wanted to ask, but she hesitated. Liara glanced up to meet her gaze and continued. "He had gone into shock when the Alliance soldiers found him. I don’t think he could really register what was going on. When I saw him on the Alliance ship, he looked awful.” Liara looked down. “He spoke maybe ten words for an entire month. Every time you were mentioned, he’d leave the room. We all knew he blamed himself.”

Shepard couldn’t think of a way to reply. She’d wondered, of course, how her death had hit each of them. Joker hardly spoke of it. After a while the conversation lapsed, and Shepard stood. “I should get going. The Alliance isn’t going to wait on me forever.” She turned to Liara just as the asari pulled her into a tight hug. Shepard relented for a moment. “It was good to see you again.”

“You as well.” Liara pulled away. “I don’t imagine you’ll stay grounded for long, Shepard. You always seem to find yourself into the middle of some sort of trouble.” Her face darkened. “And when the Reapers get here..”

“The Council will finally have to acknowledge their damn existence.”  Shepard smiled at Liara and stepped away. “I’ll be sure to find you when something happens. That is, if you don’t find me first.”

Liara smiled. “I’ll keep an eye out.”

----

Joker spun to face her as she stepped back onto the Normandy. “So, how’s Liara?”

“She’s doing good, I think. She seems oddly comfortable with being the Shadow Broker, but I won’t question it.” Shepard walked into the cockpit, crossing her arms. “We’re heading to Earth.”

“Will do.” Joker turned back around, interacting with the interface. “You’re ready to turn yourself in, then?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be.” She stepped up beside him, watching as he directed the Normandy towards the nearest relay. “Be sure to take care of the Normandy while I’m grounded, Joker.”

“What, you think I’d leave my baby uncared for? Have we met?” He looked up at her and grinned.

“I’m not the one who spilled something in the cockpit and got your fancy leather seats all sticky.” She raised an eyebrow and glanced down at him. He frowned.

“Fine. You got me on that one.”

[kuwaiti-kid]

What Jurassic Park Taught Me About Personal Finance

*Jurassic Park movie and book spoilers below*

There has always been something thrilling and enticing to me about dinosaurs.

They seem like a fantasy, but they were real-life monsters that actually walked this earth. And, though they are terrifying, there's something attractive about them too. They seem to threaten humanity as the dominant species, even from their extinction — reminding us that we're lucky to have made it this far.

The Jurassic Park franchise, especially the first movie, does an incredible job of capturing this idea and sharing it with its global Hollywood audience.

I've always been a dinosaur junkie. Growing up in the early 1990s, I was too young to catch the theatrical release of Spielberg's Jurassic Park movie. I had my fair share of dinosaur pop-up books and action figures though.

Later, I had full-on kids' dinosaur encyclopedias. In high school, I finally watched all of the Jurassic Park movies (the first 3 that were out, at the time) and I read both of the Michael Crichton books. This inspired a years-long period of Michael Crichton fandom and science fiction consumption.

Now, I write a blog about early retirement. I'm realizing that many of the moments that make the original movie so special also apply to personal finance. Maybe my nerd colors are showing, but I feel a similar sense of intrigue and excitement when it comes to financial planning.

Here's why Steven Spielberg's Jurassic Park movie applies to personal finance and means more to me than being just CGI and sharp teeth.

There’s a Sense of Excitement and Possibilities

The opening sequences of both the Jurassic Park book and movie build tension and excitement about the possibility of the dinosaurs. Could scientists really achieve this dino re-boot? And if so, should they? The plot has viewers asking themselves these questions, both in the fictional movie realm and in real life.

When our archaeologist heroes finally arrive at Isla Nublar with dozens of the re-born creatures in full view, it's an iconic scene in cinematic history. Groundbreaking CGI (that still holds up decently well, considering its age) and an extraordinary music score from John Williams solidify the sense of wonder and was truly unprecedented for 1993 viewers. The main theme still gives me goosebumps, even today.

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In the movie, the paleontologists, kids, and businesspeople alike (especially John Hammond) experience moments of joy and awe at the sight of the living dinosaurs. I like that both Crichton and Spielberg showed these people across a spectrum of ages and backgrounds — everyone is in awe of the dinosaurs, at least in some way.

The first time the significance of investing and financial independence “clicks” can feel the same way. The compound growth of your investments is an immensely powerful force. It's awe-inspiring. Financial independence can create simultaneous control and flexibility with your time. And, like the appeal of dinosaurs, personal finance affects everyone.

Over the past millennia, the concept of financial independence or retirement didn't exist until relatively recently. The ability to dictate your own schedule and priorities is a thrilling concept that, like the Jurassic Park movie, is really unprecedented in human history.

Be Skeptical — Bad Guys Take Advantage of Good People

In Jurassic Park, bioengineering company InGen seems to be motivated primarily by corporate greed. InGen has developed a groundbreaking technique that lets them harvest dino DNA and fill in the gaps so they can create healthy dino eggs.

Rather than using this technology exclusively for research or gradual entrepreneurship, the company goes all-in and develops a theme park attraction with about a dozen species (including ferocious carnivores). Any viewer or reader could sense that something was bound to go wrong.

In the book, and many of Crichton's other novels, there's an even stronger tone of warning. Crichton's stories repeatedly suggest that corporations are bound to take major risks to achieve possible profits, even at the expense of human lives and society as a whole. This worldview may sound extreme, but it's certainly a valid concern in today’s technological and business climates.

From early on, Jeff Goldblum's Ian Malcolm was skeptical that the Jurassic Park experiment would go according to plan.

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Similarly, you need to maintain a level of skepticism and awareness when it comes to your investments and financial products.

Many people in the financial services industry are not obligated to act in the individual's best interest. Often, investments and insurance products are sold with huge fees and expenses that seriously reduce the benefit of the product. Customers need to be informed and very careful when making investment and insurance decisions.

You Need to Prepare for the Unpredictable

The Ian Malcolm character is a mathematician and he famously specializes in chaos theory, which the movie references multiple times. Chaos theory “seeks to explain the effect of seemingly insignificant factors. Chaos theory is considered by some to explain chaotic or random occurrences.”

Very small, unpredictable factors can cause ripple effects that lead to significant results.

The Malcolm character acts as the voice of author Michael Crichton — the voice of caution and reason in the face of the greedy, hasty InGen corporation. Through the plot, Malcolm is proven correct as the park's plans unravel and the death count grows.

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Many of chaos theory's implications can be applied to personal finance, too. Seemingly small or isolated events can lead to major changes in your own financial situation or in the global economy. So, it's best to be cautious and be prepared. Be aware of the risk and manage it. Some of the best ways to do this are to increase your financial literacy, diversify your investments, or make the retirement transition more gradual and strategic through semi-retirement.

Don't Go at it Alone

As a bit of a corollary to the chaos theory takeaway, the Jurassic Park movie shows the danger in avoiding or disregarding expert input. None of the scientist consultants in the movie were comfortable with InGen's plans for resurrecting dinos. InGen was blinded by their own greed and John Hammond, specifically, was blinded by his own enthusiasm — even though the movie portrays him as good-natured, in a way.

In the book, Hammond is killed by the dinosaurs and it takes more of a righteous punishment tone, due to his lack of caution in designing and managing the park.

The Jurassic Park heroes (Malcolm, the paleontologists, and the kids) make it out of the park alive, thanks to their sober critical thinking and problem-solving abilities — skills that InGen lacked.

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In the same way, it's incredibly valuable to not approach your finances completely on your own. Seek professional input from a fiduciary advisor, if you have questions. Engage with the personal finance blogging community to encourage you on your journey towards financial independence. If you have savvy friends or family members, ask for their advice too when you're not sure how to move forward. You will develop your own sense of what advice is right and wrong. You'll be encouraged, and you'll realize that if a financial product seems too good to be true, it probably is.

It's Not About Dinosaurs (or a Big Bank Account)

The Jurassic Park movie masquerades as a prehistoric thriller, full of monsters and sci-fi-induced adrenaline. But really, as Crichton intended it, it was a cautionary tale. Jurassic Park is about the evils and selfishness of big business, the imperfections of humanity, and a lack of understanding and respect for other life and for the earth's history.

Likewise, personal finance isn't just about running up a high score in your retirement account. Progressing towards financial independence is about higher values that it can unlock — controlling your own future, self-actualization, flexibility, and creating a life that's in line with your own values and goals.

Maybe I'm just a dinosaur and money nerd, but I love seeing the parallels between these two topics. There's something beautiful that the Crichton books, the original film, and the financial independence movements all share — humble reminders of the best and worst of what we can be as humans.

The post What Jurassic Park Taught Me About Personal Finance appeared first on Your Money Geek.

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