#the honest answer would be
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studiousandrogynousfox-blog · 3 months ago
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last semester ever?
the semester started a couple of weeks ago, but because i'm doing the research portion of my degree, this normally wouldn't mean anything (research doesn't stop during summer), but i bailed on my resit in the summer so i actually have one final lecture course to do.
i just hope i somehow make it through this semester, pass the exam, and can finish the research project, because then i'm finally done with this degree
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knifearo · 10 months ago
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ultimately when it comes to shipping and fandom space treatment of aspec characters i just don't accept "aro/ace people can still date/have sex" as an answer from nonaspecs. like yeah. mhm. okay. now i think we both know that you're not saying that out of real interest in the diversity of aspec experiences. so you can turn in your seventeen-page essay on why and how you plan to examine this character's aspec identity within the context of a romantic or sexual relationship complete with evidence from canon and peer reviews from multiple aspec people within the next week or i'm putting you in the pit from the edgar allen poe story
#you know. the one with the pendulum#'hey. why are you as an allo person shipping this aspec character like this'#'oh aspec people can still date/have sex!'#'yeah. now can you answer the question that i actually asked you'#like goddamn just say you don't care they're aspec and you want to fulfill a sexual/romantic fantasy with them. that's Fine#it like. sucks. for sure. lotta aspec people will be unhappy with you. but everyone is entitled to their own wants and experiences.#but i'd prefer you just be honest with it rather than using our community's conversation points as retroactive justification#and ONCE AGAIN. you guys are real fucking cavalier with this shit and it shows a real fundamental lack of respect for aspecs#when most of you would NEVER ship a canonically gay character with the 'other' gender. cause again. it would suck.#you can do it. nobody's Stopping you. but it would suck.#and we understand that putting a queer character in situations that erase that queerness is shitty! until it comes to aspec characters!#and whoa... there it is again... people don't consider aspec identities to be queer... crazy how it always comes back to that#anyway. you all know what i'm talking about. have seen many posts about this lately#it is [ long sigh ] unfortunately a very hot button issue with the advent lately of alastor hazbinhotel#which. again. god i wish there were other canon aspec characters to be having this conversation about.#but we'll have to do our best with what we have#aromantic#aromanticism#arospec#aroace#talking#aspec#asexual#asexuality
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kittykatninja321 · 10 months ago
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Any au that has Jason willingly working for the government even if it’s as a social worker has automatically kinda lost me because we’re talking about someone who distrusts the system so much that as a child he chose the streets over going into custody of social services. Jason’s lack of faith in institutions continues into adulthood (but also through his original Robin tenure low key), one of the most substantial differences between his and Bruce’s philosophy is the fact that Bruce puts his faith in the law and the criminal justice system while Jason decidedly does not in the slightest
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canisalbus · 8 months ago
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Does Ludo crossdress? I imagine she'd be, on most occasions, be seen walking about with Vasco's clothes, near indistinguishable from men.
In my mind she's projecting major sword lesbian vibes so I wouldn't put it entirely past her.
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lunar-wandering · 8 months ago
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do y'all think Macaque is falling back into the role that Azure and the others put on him by remaining on the outskirts of the group because he thinks his input/presence is unwanted (and yeah his presence isn't really wanted by MK and the others BUT. something about the fact Macaque is placing himself at the edge of the group, the edge that Azure and the others pushed him to, doesn't really sit well)
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#Monkie Kid#lego monkie kid#monkie kid spoilers#lmk spoilers#im gonna be completely honest: i think the only reason Mac HASN'T apologized is cause he thinks they wont listen to it#so he's trying to do things WAY more subtly and it's NOT working out#and when i say ''he thinks they won't listen'' i dont mean he thinks they won't forgive him#honestly the group would be split 50/50 between ''forgives him'' and ''suspicious but willing to let him try''#i FULL OUT mean he thinks they won't listen. that they won't even hear his apology and will just talk over/ignore him#or completely misinterpret what he's saying#THAT'S what he thinks#when he was being the villain he was putting on a show. it's HILARIOUS how obvious his actions are a front when you rewatch s1 and s2#but like?? being actually him?? he does NOT expect them to listen to him when he's just himself#sort of like a. ''if you want people to listen you have to anger/frighten them into paying attention'' kind of mentality#not a good mentality to have#it DOES explain why he reacts Like That whenever someone does something that indicates they DID pay attention though#like. listen hear me out. i do NOT think Macaque expected MK to remember the Warrior thing.#so when MK brought it up it hit him like a truck#also why he reacts like that when Wukong somewhat seriously answers his ''you know this is just the calm before the storm'' question#+ when Wukong says ''we''#cause he does not consider himself part of the group. hence staying on the outskirts#GOD this guy is such a delicious pack of trauma to dissect. thank you lego for giving me not one#not two#but THREE traumatized monkeys to analyze
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 1 year ago
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Smell Check [Easy: Failure]
MDZS Disco Elysium AU part 1 (part 2 - part 3)
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#disco elysium#MDZS Disco Elysium AU#So sad I didn't manage to get this comic out on the 15th (pd-mdzs's 8 month anniversary and DE's 4th year anniversary) but I'm here *now*#I have a very extensive and detailed MDZS Disco Elysium AU that I am Not Normal About.#I've seen a few other people point out the potential in a crossover (true) but they make the mistake in having it be set in 51!#A true crossover would take place closer to The Antecentennial Revolution!#Disco Elysium did not go that hard on its cool lore for people to only make surface level crossovers!!!#One day I'll write the fic or post my notes. I don't know who would read it but it tickles *my* brain and that's enough.#No spoilers for DE (here or in comments (please)) but please consider....Magpie Wei Wuxian B*) On his way to be an innocent.#I do think there is a good chance a chunk of the MDZS readership would enjoy DE but...it's also not a game I easily recommend#It's more of an experience you have to marinate over. It's dark in ways that are off putting to some people.#It makes you feel like a very bad person all the time. It gets extremely personal if you allow yourself to be honest in your answers#and it's also the game that saved my life. My life was truly forever changed after playing disco elysium.#If I recommend it to people it's a badge of the trust I have in you to appreciate something dear to me B'*)#If you decide to play: PLEASE go in as blind as possible. You will regret spoiling yourself.#edit: this is based on real disco elysium dialogue. HDB has many canon kinks but this is not one of them
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mohntilyet · 1 month ago
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i’m having illario dellamorte thoughts. what if instead of knowingly betraying lucanis he did it like, unknowingly. idk how this would work but i’m intrigued by what it gives us. illario ‘i accidentally caused my cousin’s death & can never tell anyone’ dellamorte. genuinely grieving. blaming himself. does he take advantage of the year before lucanis comes back?? does caterina still ignore him the whole time?? how different is the canon plotline once rook shows up with lucanis post-rescue…..
anyways i would love your thoughts!!
95% of what i do with illario operates on the idea that he is frighteningly competent so you can see why the way the crows plotline plays out in the game might frustrate me. it’s also this reason why i don’t actually think too much about “illario got lucanis killed, but didn’t mean to do it”, because i like the idea that everything illario does in his life is planned to the second and that he’s too well trained to mess up this badly, if that makes sense. with that being said. 5% of my brain power does sometimes go towards “and what if he just sucked actually” and it was a theory i enjoyed before the game even released. so i have in fact been thinking about this anyway LOL . maybe he tries to honeypot zara, accidentally actually reveals lucanis’ next assassination job, and zara gets rid of him as a ‘gift’. illario is horrified and that gets even worse when lucanis’ body shows up, and he assumes this must be because he spurned zara by leaving her and not having the guts to seize power.
i think we could make his inferiority complex worse. illario’s worst fear confirmed: he is as worthless as his grandmother believes he is, botching something so badly that he accidentally sentences his cousin to death when what he wanted was lucanis just… out of the way for a bit (maybe while he kills caterina. LOL. i still think his resentment of caterina trumps his jealousy for lucanis though those two things are very intertwined its hard for him to differentiate them). so incapable that he got the only person who actually supports him killed, and now he’s dreading the idea of becoming first talon. he doesn’t want first talon without lucanis backing him, and now the only person left is caterina which is suffocating and makes him even unhappier. at least he hadn’t lived through her alone, and now through consequences of his own decisions, illario has no choice but to.
i think that would affect his plans for talon because of how horribly he’d fucked up, and tries to mask it because if he suddenly actually doesn’t want to be talon that would be a red flag for everyone. lucanis coming back would delight him (talon is within his sights again if lucanis comes back!) and freak him out. i think the plotline would actually be pretty similar because of this freak out, so he still shows up to zara’s fight to cover his tracks. lucanis can never know, caterina can never know, because what little faith they have in him will be lost. like he committed fratricide and didn’t even MEAN to😭 ...corpse whispering still happens, and zara is like “ohhh that coward. he can never finish what he started, can he?” + “elaborate.” + “i gave him what he most wanted in the world and instead of being grateful, he ran away.” so lucanis finds out about what happened but feels a mix of “illario, you idiot” + pity because turns out he didn’t even mean for it to happen, and keeps his secret for now, otherwise he’d probably have to kill him.
i also think not meaning to kill lucanis would sour his feelings towards the venatori, who are a reminder of how badly he failed, so the alliance wouldn’t happen. this does mean if the story goes on as it does in canon, he has to take desperate measures another way and kidnap caterina for some other reason but i can’t think of why….. maybe a thing where illario is like “ok. lucanis is distracted by the elven gods. this time i just have to kill nonna for real and then nothing is in my way” and recruits disgraced houses or houses that don’t like caterina to do so? not sure tbh but i don’t believe caterina made it so far without making enemies lol. this would happen post bloodbath + corpse whispering— lucanis leaves his cousin unchecked because while he knows illario didn’t mean for him to die, he has no idea how far he would go to have caterina dead. teia could find out about this and send word to foil the kidnapping and assassination attempt
so ‘murder of crows’ is still about saving caterina, the illario-lucanis fight still happens, but it’s a little more hesitant and lots of “why won’t you just let me kill her? i’m doing this for the both of us”. he’s had to live with being the un-favorite, but never would have thought lucanis would actually pick caterina if it came down to it. with all of his missteps here, i think the final decision (and i think it should be like this in canon anyway) would be to imprison illario or kill him. imprisoning him is just a lot of “i can’t kill illario as much as he couldn’t kill me”, vs killing him as is expected from him as talon, and what he knew he would have to do after finding out about illario's failures. unlike canon, where illario is actually meaning to kill him and can be seen as a 'good crow' despite the sloppiness, here he's like. just bad at everything. the allied traitor houses that went against caterina would also have to be imprisoned or killed. no happy ending at all here, and lucanis still becomes first talon. now that i’ve written it out this is actually probably the worst ending LOL
the above sticks a lot to what is canon to the game (plot points, choices, etc) and i didn’t go very far away from it so it's like canon 3 inches to the left. tho my thoughts on this are not fleshed out* because i think illario works better as an antagonist character that sets things in motion !! not necessarily the villain in a cain-abel story, but a character who opposes lucanis while still not wanting to hurt him. that kind of discipline where he finds a way to get what he wants (first talon) without compromising what he also cares for (family) is so much more fun for me than a man who apparently just loses it and decides to enact a bad plan to get rid of his cousin. if he waited 20+ years to become talon i think he’d be more careful when it came down to it. if i had my way illario would be playing insane 5d chess to rival solas (insert black sails “i once thought that to lead, to be liked was just as good as feared. and that may very well be true. but to be both liked and feared all at once, is an entirely different state of being.”)
#*my thoughts are ‘not fleshed out’ but i still wrote all this. LOL#i nearly answered this ask with the companion-illario au from my mind because i think vg needed a companion that lies to you LOL#but thats less 'illario didnt mean to do it' and more 'oh illario did it and just feels so guilty he goes on a one man crusade#against the venatori because he needs an outlet and both of them are known as magekillers'#he would have lied for most of the game about how lucanis got kidnapped/'killed' and resolves it by saving lucanis + confessing his guilt#this au had elements of 'it was an accident' but i kept flip flopping between if i wanted that or not lol#because . idk. i like when he purposefully does all this and then regrets it. my walking contradiction (slash i want him)#illario guilt inferiority and jealousy you all mean so much to me#but yeah. last point relates to the envyllario rewrite also from my mind#the idea of like. that caution vanishing because of the envy demon is quite fun for me#so spite makes lucanis a victim to his own anger and sense of justice#while envy refuses to let illario maintain his veneer of charm and forces him to act rashly despite his planning#ok. i have to stop talking. thank u anon for this because i am always looking for an excuse to chat shit#prompt me at any point to speak about illario and i honest to god will just be sat here thinking#actually it was pretty bad a few days ago when i was thinking about ways it could go for him in my aus and drawing a blank#and had the very clear thought 'i NEED to put my thinking cap on' which was . a bit humiliating#illario dellamorte#long post#answered#anonymous
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pseudophan · 10 months ago
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Not sure if I've maybe sent you this before but every time someone brings up the cat whiskers, I recall freshman year when I nearly got suspended for wearing cat whiskers to school for months and refused to stop sharpie-ing them back on every night (when they started bothering me about it I started using an industrial sharpie, it was Not Coming Off), which then led to like like 8 other people being threatened with suspension for wearing cat whiskers in solidarity with me after I told them about it, lmfao. Most people at that school never received context for why this happened, and most of the participants did not really know who Dan and Phil were either. Honestly teens just love a rebellion so I think everyone had fun, but I will be haunted by this event until I die.
this is honestly legendary and as a proud llama-hat-to-school wearer i salute you
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b0tster · 1 year ago
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how much does eyeliner cost ruin your pockets per month? be honest with us
10 dollars a pen and i go through 2 sets of 2 a month (one for the outline one for fill) so 40 i guess lol?
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itsonlypolite · 2 months ago
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how has your day been?
Thanks for asking! :) Honestly though, bit slow. I always go through highs and lows of creativity, looks like I'm back on my way down from the high I was on. Ah well!
Usually whenever this happens I try to switch up whatever I was drawing before as a brief break, so I've actually been doodling my Favorite Character Ever - Sean Hampson from Vampyr! Not StP related obviously but he'd be besties with VoT Broken, and I hope you don't mind but I'm just going to share all my drawings of Sean here:
(SPOILERS FOR VAMPYR)
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I'm so mentally ill about sad people with religious trauma that have their Moments, anyone who likes Broken should play Vampyr just for this guy, I am forever rotating him in my mind, anyways thanks for asking and I hope your day is going good! :)
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teecupangel · 3 months ago
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@saltyartofcroatia left this reply on the Desmond in Honkai Star Rail idea
Oh, cool we're talking about Hoyoverse games :D I started playing Genshin Impact this years new years and the second I learned about the specific criteria someone needs to 'check' to get a vision, my first thought was: 'How do I put Desmond in this situation?'
One of the reasons that they believe the Traveler could use any element is because they’re outsiders so, if this is a case of Desmond being the ultimate isekai protagonist, Desmond would be counted as an outsider by Teyvat.
Or, if you want a more dramatic entrance for our Desmond…
In the Archon story of Inazuma, part of the possible consequence of losing one’s Vision is forgetting one’s ambition or drive (which supposedly was the reason one was granted a Vision in the first place) and sometimes they even lose memories related to their ambition or drive.
In this case, Desmond would wake up somewhere in Inazuma and he has no idea why he’s there. His last memories are dying to save the world.
As he’s trying to get his bearing, Yae Miko would appear before him because there was a peculiar scent in the air.
Desmond has no recollection but Yae Miko told him that he was employed in the Grand Narukami Shrine as sort of on hand fixer and muscle. She was actually looking for him because he went missing last night, seven days since his Vision was taken by the orders of the Raiden Shogun.
As far as Yae Miko and the rest of the shrine were concerned, Desmond is a member of the shrine.
But Yae Miko does admit to him that he smell different. He has a similar scent to the Traveler who she hasn’t made contact yet but had been keeping an eye on.
Desmond is left trying to figure what the hell is happening and people of the shrine thinks he lost his memories and try to help him. At the same time, the rest of the canon story continue in the background.
(Maybe Desmond decides to join as a third party Assassin who attacks the Shogun’s army once he heard about what was happening, maybe Yae Miko managed to keep him isolated with teaching him about Teyvat and everyhing else long enough for the Traveler to finish the storyline, up to you)
By the end of it, the Visions are returned to everyone and Desmond gets his but…
His Vision returned cracked. There was no symbol of what element he had, just… nothing.
They managed to get an audience with Raiden who told him that she doesn’t know what happened to his Vision. His Vision was kept at the same place as every other Vision and his was the only one that was damaged.
When she saw Desmond, she also instinctively felt that he was an outsider. She doesn’t know if it’s because Desmond was an orphan with unknown parents (and due to how he looks, many believe he’s from another nation) or if Desmond’s belief was right and he came from another world.
Either way, it seems to Desmond that even the archon does not have the answers he seek.
.
Not gonna lie, my favorite is Sumeru and I would love to put Desmond in Sumeru just to make him stare at Alhaitham, internally debating to himself if Alhaitham reminds him of Altaïr or Haytham or if he’s just seeing something that wasn’t necessarily there because of Alhaitham’s name which could still happen if the plot is that Desmond leaves Inazuma for Sumeru to check if that nation would have any idea why he’s there and if he truly came from another world.
Although my suggestion that Desmond’s element should be Dendro is definitely not because my main team is Hyperbloom team. Nope. Definitely not.
My suggestion for Desmond to be Dendro is related to him amplifying his ancestors’ Elements.
Altaïr - Electro
Ezio - Pyro
Ratonhnhaké:ton - Hydro
And this brings me to my next idea for this one.
Since we are obligated to throw Desmond a bone in the form of OP powers in exchange for making him our favorite isekai protagonist chewtoy, the idea would be that he learned his Vision is Dendro but he’s able to wield a secondary element.
(Gameplay-wise, this would be similar to him having a Dendro infused normal attack, his secondary element being trigger via his skill and being able to change his secondary element via his burst)
His skill would appear similar to, I cannot think of a Hoyo equivalent at the moment sorry, Desmond summons a Phantom ala Wuthering Waves’ Calcharo that appears to look like his ancestor, wrapped in their element and delivering an AOE strike that infuses a certain area with their element at the same time they hit an enemy with their actual strike. (this is also a reference to Altaïr’s Assassin Ghosts in AC Revelations)
I gave Ezio Pyro because the burning of Cappadocia. Altaïr gets Electro because Electro feels like the fastest element thanks to Clorinde. And Ratonhnhaké:ton gets Hydro because it’s still the strongest DPS element at the moment XD
(For course, we'll get a similar setup if we make Desmond have Anemo but that would mean Desmond would have to remember to use his skill first before his normal attack lollol)
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chasedeys · 1 month ago
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hi hello i keep thinking about joemarr being fwb at lsu but it never turns into anything until they’re playing together on the bengals and they’re a little older and more mature. but when they think too much about what their relationship is they realize they’ve been in love this entire time and neither of them want to be the one to admit it </3
oh hellooo!!!! this is sooo??? i would love!!!!! to hear more of your thoughts on this fwb au!!!!!! insane little tidbit of them not realizing they're actually together are you in my headddd are you planning on writing a fic?? please say yes 🫶
i have. so many thoughts. on fwb joemarr 😔 and all of it is angst. which i don't write. but just the way i have this in my drafts 😭 please don't ask why i never actually reblogged it
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i know i said i have thoughts on this fwb au but in all honesty it's very jumbled it's a mess it's unfinished it has a beginning and a little point in the middle and literally no end. but i'd like to expand on it anyway! so:
like 20% knowledge of their lsu timeline sorry (i wish i knew more of their roster btw :(( this would make writing this entire thing easier and more detailed) but midway through their undefeated season when they're finally getting way more comfortable outside of the field, a post-game party in one of the seniors' house, drinking, partying etc, they weren't exactly attached at the hip that time yk still slowly learning how to be friends instead of just teammates, learning how to joke with each other, learning what makes the other tick etc. they end up seated together at a table with the rest of the guys, table small enough and crowded enough they're pressed right up against one another but it's casual you know they're bros completely normal to have your arms touching as you yell at one of the guys to chug etc etc. they just end up staying close the whole time—yapping at one another, jeering at others together, ganging up on justin that one time, weirdly sharing personal things with each other in the middle of a crowd when no one was paying attention to them, smiling at each other dopily for a weirdly long time like for some strange reason, that night they clicked in ways never before outside of the field?? like that moment ja'marr said they both clicked on the field for the first time ever, but this time in the middle of someone's dining room, pressed ankles to shoulders to each other, also in the middle of the loud cheers of their teammates, breath seemingly in one space from how close they were together.
the crowd dwindles but they stick close together, joe has his arm around ja'marr like he usually does at times when his adrenaline is high but this time it's just because he just wants to (not that he fully understands why), ja'marr is quiet because he's sleepy so he just follows wherever joe is dragging him, and they're walking out the house with some of the guys, someone is singing ballads loudly and incoherently for some reason, and joe's house is close by, so they stop there and ja'marr is just following in like a dumbass because he's so fucking buzzed but he feels safe with his quarterback so who gives a shit if he's intruding. none of the other really say anything because, hey why not their star qb and their little wide receiver seem like they'd follow the other anywhere really at this point so have at it. and they're hollering the two goodbye as they walk away and now joe and ja'marr are just alone together in joe's modest little rental and it's quiet and comfy and they're grinning at each other dopily for the nth time and then somehow the most natural progression for them is for joe to offer ja'marr the bed and ja'marr to scoff and say they should just share like hell either of them is fucking up their back on the shitty couch and then they're brushing their teeth in joe's modest bathroom side-by-side and joe is offering him some sweats and a t-shirt to sleep in and ja'marr is just staring blankly down at the faded spongebob t-shirt handed to him while joe is rambling at him how he has just one pillow so do you want to rock paper scissors this or—they kiss 🤗
like you could say ja'marr dropped the t-shirt and stepped right into joe's space and kissed him or you could say joe trailed off mid-sentence because he got so fucking distracted by his wr being shirtless in his bedroom in his sweats staring down at his shirt with those stupid lashes that he reached out an arm to reel him in to kiss him or you could say they just decided right then right there they wanted the other in no other way than like that that they both did the stupidest thing they could possibly do mid-season and kiss their teammate and undress them and shove them toward the bed and climb on top of them and grind down against them and—
they completely blacked out unfortunately for their first time 😔 joe woke up first with his face tucked into ja'marr's neck and he groggily untangles himself without clocking how or why they're like this and he sits up and looks blankly down at ja'marr spread eagle snoring in his bed wearing nothing that he could see and covered in bitemarks and promptly untangles himself away from the bed and out the door and into his bathroom to freak the fuck out by himself. got himself together somehow and starts making pancakes (? does he cook. i don't actually know.) because fuck if this ruins anything between them or their chances of winning the natty his one-track-minded-ness and sheer determination to win saves them tbh. ja'marr wakes up alone but joe's clanging pans in the kitchen so he knows damn well someone's outside and he knows this is joe's bedroom and all those clothes strewn around is both of theirs and the splitting headache and sore everything doesn't stop him from realizing that holy fuck they slept together. frantically tugging yesterday's clothes on, panic mounting like crazy, probably crying too, and stopping right in front of the closed door with his head pressed against the wood feeling like everything is falling apart. he musters up the courage to walk out anyway and he can't read joe as well as he does now while joe's putting up a frigid front through sheer stubbornness when he's also freaking the fuck out inside especially when he comes face to face with an ashen-faced ja'marr clearly crying too.
there should be like more after this like hooking up only sometimes, growing closer and attributing it to how they're also fucking now but is it really all there is to it. they completely sidestep that initial awkwardness because what else could they do they got a game to win a championship to get to. they get sooooo much better on the field making each other look stupid good etc etc. and throughout this shit show of sleeping with each other they have talked about it just once and that was to say 'I don't think im gay but' and how there's 'no harm' in continuing the way they do. yeah.
things come to a stop after the natty of course, they don't see each other as often because joe's getting ready for his combine (?????) etc i don't actually know what goes on after tbh but basically they grow apart, joe moves out of nola back to ohio, gets into cincy, gets injured, etc. i think i could add like more to this entire arc (?? what fucking arc) but no thoughts rn tbh. oh but this little period is also where they come to terms with their sexuality!! being apart for a whole year, learning how to be somebody without the other, exploring other options, settling firmer on who they are, etc.
ja'marr gets into bengals, and things don't really start up again at first because they don't really feel like it? like they're still relearning who the other is after all these months apart? like it was just really genuinely casual to them they either fuck or they don't, it was a bit of fun, they aren't going crazy when they see each other again because to them it didn't really mean much of anything other than a bit of fun between friends! but there's some totally insane underlying feelings that they don't realize of course. the emotional roller coaster of ja'marr's preseason drops getting attacked left and right, joe steadfast in his belief in ja'marr comforting him (there's totally a high tensioned scene of this where they're just shy of something but ja'marr was too fucked up about his drops for it to actually come to anything), then their first game together first nfl touchdown 🫶
they might fuck again after that? but to be completely honest i have nothing else to add to this. maybe some angst of them starting up again and then stopping because suddenly it got...weird? because they're starting to realize oh wow hey what i'm feeling for you is not casual stuff. theres a little 'hey i don't think we should do this again tbh like let's focus more on the sb now that we're yk in the nfl we're not dumb kids anymore' or something idk but mostly i want them to agree not to fuck again untilll ->
this one fucking sceneeee that honestly kickstarted this entire thing but basically post sb loss they just slow-dance to the first time ever i saw your face by roberta flack. this just would notttt leave my minddd. they just dance slow and intimate in the middle of joe's living room. and it's like. after they lost the superbowl. after ja'marr dragged his ass out to the get him out of his head and after a whole day of just getting drunk of their asses and drinking away their feelings very manfully and fucked-upped-ly. they spill out their uber to joes house but they can't sleep and they just. start up the radio that's annoyingly repeating the superbowl fuckery and they just keep switching the station until they end up weirdly in this obscure one where the host is saying something completely unintelligible and then the song's opening instrumentals start up and of the sudden they're just wrapped around one another in the middle of joe's living room.
and then they're just in each others arms and staring deeply into the others eyes and still trying to deal with the loss and this uncertainty between them as roberta flack croons the first time i ever kissed your mouth i felt the earth move in my hand like the trembling heart of a captive bird that was there at my command my love and i just feel sooo fucked up over it. staying rooted in one place on joe's ridiculous rug just wrapped up in one another neither able to say a word the radio conveniently shutting off just dead air until boom who knows kissed who first they just end up in bed together like all those times before.
and its the first time in a while that they actually sleep together again after their pact to not do it again! and the thing is it's good this time! it isn't like any of the other times they slept together and pretended everything was fine and made the stupid conclusion that it was bad for them! i mean it was because they didn't really talk about it if they did it would be great you know but. this time they feel settled! they actually cuddle unashamedly in the afternoon that they woke up! had brunch together with the food that's usually delivered around that time for joe! made very distinct training plans together, fired up for the next season and trying again for a ring etc etc actually making plans for the future together basically.
AND THIS COULD END HERE OKAY like they have full blown realization and actual conversation that oh. this is it. this is literally the it that they've been avoiding for some reason and oh my future is literally you and not just on the field as a quarterback or a receiver or a teammate but you as something so definitive for me that there is literally no other way this could end other than us being together! totally could end here but!! in a separate timeline by which i mean if i could make it wayyy angstier than it needs to be:
like everything is niceeee, everything is hot and horny it's crazy they keep doing things together they've never thought of doing with anybody else! but they're not fucking talking even when they keep getting feelings and freaking out in the most random of moments over the other (hence the posts up top) and then burying their feelings down the next second because they think the other doesn't feel the same and think that what they have going on is enough. really. it is.
okay so like this fwb fic in my head is actually. way longer. like as in ja'marr trades out of cincy longer 😭 just they just keep pretending everything is fine and dandy and that shit is sooo not good for them and this actually ends in ja'marr being unable to handle all his feelings and running away leaving cincy lmaooooo sooo sorry (no idea if they won a sb before ja'marr left or not lmao which would be more fucked up do you think). i feel like i should expand more on why this ends up that way but i can't. which is like why this is never going to be a full fic 😭. it's kind of like that one time i mentioned this in an ask sort of inspired by bad bunny's cloud 9 'you will always be my favorite form of loving' 😃.
this is honestly mostly because of another slow dancing scene i can't get out of my head :")) they slow dance one last time before the news officially breaks out the next day to hey that's no way to say goodbye roberta flack ver. jesus sorry im in my feelings with her sooo sorry but look at the lyricsssss do you get me
I loved you in the morning, our kisses deep and warm And your hair upon the pillow like a sleepy golden storm Many loved before us, I know we are not new And in city and in forest they loved like me and you But now it's come to distances, both of us must try Your eyes fill with sorrow Hey, that's no way to say goodbye I'm not looking for another as I wander in my time Walk me to the corner, our steps will always rhyme You know my heart goes with you, your love stays with me It's just the way life changes, like the shoreline of the sea But let's not talk of love or change, things we can untie Your eyes fill with sorrow Hey, that's no way to say goodbye
ja'marr trades to another team, the nfl actually set them up against each other for week 5 and so they finally see each other again after that one last dance where they didn't hook up btw to add to the misery. they fall into bed again after whoever the fuck won i have no idea and. fought......fucked each other up beyond repair.........
i don't actually know how the story would progress after :) so sorry. it's like my mind stopped right there and theres no end in sight to their misery hurt no comfort etc. but if it's any consolation i do think i would end this not fic im not writing with ja'marr trading back to cincy and they finally make up officially and win a sb together <3 (the i love you post up top is set during their first match up btw so they got way too fucked up about it because?? you fucking left me for another team??? and fought etc but the love is there ofc so they called each other and made up etc)
on another handdd i also have thoughts for a completely different fwb au where they aren't freaked out at all btw. like no life changing thing about it they just go on with their lives like 'oh we're fucking now? of course we are' because they're soooo comfortable with each other they don't need to freak out about it or talk about it they know each other why would trusting the other with something as intimate as sex be anything bad. it feels food! it's fun! they love how they are in the bedroom together! and their relationship just progresses naturally to actually being together in an actual relationship because of course! they go on these dates anyhow what's more with feelings involved?
joe thinking 'oh I'm in love with you' as ja'marr unpacks their uber eats for them on joe's living room where they plan on binge-watching star trek discovery rambling about every little thing he could think of and then just nodding and going on with his life helping ja'marr unpack and needling him for his pickiness with food. ja'marr thinking 'oh I'm in love with you' as joe fusses over the new chrome hearts catalog that ja'marr showed him trying to pick over their new matching jackets or something and then just nodding and going on with his life telling joe to shut the fuck up he is not wearing that pick something else. pressing foreheads after the second orgasm of the night and just staring at one another and quietly letting out their first i-love-yous and then grinning at each other and laughing and rolling around on the bed trying to be the first to kiss the other after that bombshell and going on with their lives deciding if they want to move in together, if they want to tell their parents at the same time to save the hassle, if they should finally bring tee out of his misery of pretending they aren't together no matter what tee says, etc etc. just one without angst because they trust the other so much it really isn't difficult at all.
oh and there's this lovelyyyyyy bit of one night stand thing during the natty championship that @cementcornfield cooked up that i am sooo obsessed with that you should definitely read if you haven't!!!
sorry if any of this doesn't make sense or the grammar is shit btw 😭 but i would loveeeeeeeeeee to read more on this ask you sent!! tell me all about your ideas!!!!! please <3
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wishchip106 · 8 days ago
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why does all the X-Men movie prequel posters looks like that...like they're all so..... badly edited 😭🙏
idk honestly 😔😔😔
the 2010’s were a strange time indeed 🤔
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canisalbus · 4 months ago
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💕Positivity prime time! Share five things you love about yourself, four things you're excited about, OR three people you care deeply about and why. Pass this along to someone whose posts make you smile💕
- It probably doesn't come through in English since it isn't my native language, but when it comes to speaking Finnish irl, I've been told I have a large vocabulary and I'm good at explaining things. I try to remember that whenever I'm feeling like an idiot.
- I have pretty good skin, I think. It's not too dry or oily and I don't get pimples often. I started using moisturizer regularly for the first time last winter and it's really nice how soft and smooth everything feels now.
- I'm reasonably good with houseplants. My personal favorite is my sago palm, but I also have accumulated lot of prayer plants and various euphorbias. I love cacti but never seem to be able to keep them alive for long, unfortunately.
- Apart from my face blindness and poor sense of direction, I have above average visual memory, or at least I strongly suspect that to be the case. It's fun. And useful.
- I've developed a liking for long, aimless walks and I think that's a positive thing. I've always been a homebody indoor person type of guy and I'm okay with that, but it's still good for you to get some fresh air and casual, no pressure exercise every once in a while. Soon it'll be winter again though and I'm not going to go outside for any longer than I have to when it's -20°C for weeks on end, but right now I'm enjoying wandering around more than I thought I would.
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moeblob · 2 months ago
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"Him? Oh, you know, he's kind of a loser." - probably everyone except for his younger brother.
Germaine is based on the layer of hell (Dante's Inferno) for material wealth before self, others, and god. So basically very materialistic and possessive of his belongings. Unfortunately, his younger brother qualifies as a belonging in his mind. So he does his absolute best to keep his brother safe and sound and scratch free - which is a bit tough in a post apocalyptic setting but he mostly manages.
Also a fact I just like to mention: he is incapable of lying.
#my characters#germaine wellington#welp guess who watched an anime recently (its not complete) and the dad of the mc made em think of a loserman big brother oc#its me! correct! the dad just reminded me a bit of germaine and i blame appearances mostly but also the dad was kind of a loser (i love him#and germaine does practically raise tremaine which further messes up their absolutely awful codependency#like yeah both brothers would kill for many reasons (survival and resources mainly) but !#if tremaine lost germaine hed probably cry and become incapable of moving on and eventually just dying w no reason to live#but if germaine lost tremaine hed go insane cause no no no thats HIS brother and hed start blaming everyone#and lose all rationale and logic while hes actually one of the most logic based in the group#hes a loser but dont let him lose things or he loses it more#but when hes really mad at tremaine for whatever reason his best friend is like uh huh what are you gonna do about it#and germaine is like........... we both know i will sigh and accept it and probably pat him on the head next i see him#which is incredibly honest and exactly what he does because yeah hes mad but even mad he cannot say#im gonna slap some sense into him because thats a lie he wouldn't hurt his brother#everyone in their group knows he cant lie so when he gets hesitant after being asked something they just know#hes trying to plot the best way to skirt the answer bc its apparently Not Good#he looks angry and annoyed often but its just resting bitch face#he lights up when he sees tremaine and he lightens up a little with his best friend#like lil smiles for his bestie and brother but when talking ABOUT his brother? he lights up and beams because hes so proud#of the coolest and smartest thing in his life (his brother)
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hyperfocusthusly · 2 months ago
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Actually idk if you’ve seen Schitt’s creek but I kind of want that similar relationship of Patrick and David where Patrick kind of teases David but in a lighthearted way. E.g. Patrick humouring David cause David needs ‘a steady hand’ for his eye cream.
Hello love!
I have seen Schitt’s Creek and honestly Patrick and David are one of my absolute favourite couples in terms of their dynamic and I can 100% see Buck and Tommy having a similar vibe, it would be a dream for me honestly
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