#the funniest thing is when i was driving my partner to work and when we arrived he was talking in a jersey accent all of a sudden

[catboynutsack]

listen nj drivers are a special kind of driver born out of our weird aggression and I think that's why everyone hates us (reasonably so when we're out of state). within our own ecosystem we thrive bc the aggression is cultural, it's just part of life. everyone does it. but when u take us out we become an invasive species. and when other species enter our home ecosystem we fuckin tailgate them and swear loudly for some reason (the reason being that they're going 25 in a 35 when everyone knows you're supposed to go 45 dhfhshdhah)

[goshdangronpa]

Where to begin in sharing my thoughts on Class of '09: The Flip Side ...

Well, how about the positives? Everything I've seen is so negative, and trust me, I have thoughts. But I enjoyed quite a lot of it, and I wanna do my part to balance out the discourse. So, here's a list.

Jecka makes for an interesting protagonist compared to Nicole. She's far more emotional - I swear, she breaks down crying in every route, which is genuinely disconcerting. She's also way less savvy. I'm not fond of how overwhelmingly negative these endings are (more on that in another post), but it at least makes sense. Nicole gets the upper hand in several endings from the previous two games because she's usually cunning enough to avoid potential problems, manipulate her way out of them, and/or get people in serious trouble. Jecka may be a bit of a bitch (and I love her for it!), but as she says in one ending, she kinda needs Nicole. Putting her in the protag role isn't just subbing her in for Nicole. Flip Side explores how things would go for someone with slightly more conscience and way less guile.

Jecka's so goddamn gay, oh my god. Wanting to look for a "goth work girlfriend" at Hot Topic. "I can afford holes, Imma buy me some hoes!" Kissing Ari! She says she only did the latter for attention, but girl ... girl. Someday she'll ask someone "Doesn't every girl think about sleeping with their gal pals?" and be shocked when that someone says no. (Tbh when I heard that one route would explore a previous game's route from Jecka's perspective, and when I saw the CG of the jeckari kiss on Tumblr, I created an entire plotline in my head that didn't come to fruition. Pity - it'd at least make for a good fanfic.)

"It's been seven seconds." The scenes based on this bit are some of the funniest in the whole series ("Why don't you magically gather some friends?"). Like something straight out of South Park. If the Co09 anime Kickstarter had reached the stretch goal of a full 25-minute episode, would this have been the script? I've heard people say that Flip Side doesn't feel like Class of '09, or that the dialogue isn't as good in this one, but this part, among others, works for me. "Can anyone do the math?" "... I thought this was health."

I'm a lifelong FYE patron who will drive 40-odd minutes to visit the only remaining store in my entire region. So for me especially, the entire FYE storyline was a ride. It reminded me of American Dad, where every episode turns something mundane into an elaborate conspiracy or wild adventure into its secret underbelly. It's awesome from beginning to ... well, not the end, but it's mostly awesome. And we get to hang out with Kelly! That's neat!

This is apparently my hottest take: the "foot whore" routes are not that bad. For starters, they're not presented in a way that fetishizes Jecka herself. You never see her feet, or see what she does with them. Yall can still find the suggestion of it gross if you want, but comparisons to Quentin Tarantino seem unwarranted! More importantly, the foot services enable the writers to explore topics of sex work while keeping the game light on actual sexual activity. It's rare to see such subject matter broached in a thing like this, yet we get to see how circumstances can pull desperate people into selling their bodies, and how swiftly and easily they can have their boundaries violated and their safety compromised by the customers they depend on. The increasing disruption of normal conversations by the text notifications of Jeffery's donations is a genuinely despairing plot device. Both endings are troubling for different reasons (again, that's for another post), but the game's got something to say in a way that, to me, is fairly mature yet distinctly Class of '09. (Credit to my partner for this observation, I'm so grateful I could play this with them.)

... Uh ... the music sting from the opening monologue bumps ... It sounds more Class of '17 than Class of '09, but it's still cool ...

Okay so I can't think of more, at least not right now. (EDIT: How did I forget the Hatman? That was cute!) Flip Side may be the most flawed game in the series, but it's still pretty good. At the very least, I don't think it's the shitshow other people are making it out to be ... though there is a smell. I'll go deeper on the negatives in other posts.

[awholelotofladybug]

On Ice 2: A Stammering Adrien AU Story

Based on this AU.

Disclaimer: The only characters or locations I own are the ones I make up. All other fictional characters and locations in Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug and Cat Noir are the property of Thomas Astruc and Zag. Please support the official release.

Ladybug hissed at the cold as she navigated through a now-frozen Paris. Even with the new power-ups, every second she spent moving through the chilled wind felt like an hour. Her cheeks and nose were probably the coldest. She'd give almost anything for a scarf or a ski mask at that moment.

'Maybe thinking about warm things will help,' she thought. 'A blanket. No, warmer. Hot cocoa. Better, but still not warm enough. A nice campfire. Yeah, that's good. A big, heavy coat. That works too. Chat Noir. Wait, Chat Noir?'

Yes, amid her thinking, Ladybug saw her partner coming toward her, as fast as a torpedo.

"Chat!" she exclaimed with a smile.

"M'lady!" Chat shouted as he rushed to hug her. "Boy, am I glad to s-s-s-see you!"

Ladybug laughed. "You too, kitty. Say, how were the macaroons I gave you last week?"

"Delicious," said Chat. "Ate… Ate the whole box in one go."

"Careful, kitty. Don't want to overdo it with the sweets," Ladybug teased as she patted his stomach.

Chat chuckled. "Moi? Never."

Ladybug smiled. It was always great to catch up with Chat. It was just a shame it had to be during an Akuma attack. That's when the windchill came back.

"Brrrr. This cold is driving me crazy," said Ladybug. "We better get a move on and…"

"Put this Akuma on ice?" Chat said with a smirk.

Ladybug couldn't help but let out a snort. Yes, the pun was lousy, but in the funniest way. And she could see the smug look on Chat's face. He had one every time he made her laugh.

"Honestly," she said. "Are you a cat or a clown?"

Chat shrugged. "C-C-C-Can't I be both?"

With a few more chuckles, the young duo stopped their jesting and went through the streets to find the Akuma, hopefully before they caught frostbite.

Frozer laughed as he skated expertly across the frozen Parisian pathways.

"Ah, revenge really is like ice cream," he said. "Sweet and best served cold. Wouldn't you agree, Hawkmoth?"

"Overused metaphors aside," said Hawkmoth telepathically. "There's still the matter of Ladybug and Chat Noir's Miraculouses."

"Keep your jacket on," said Frozer. "I'm sure those little pipsqueaks are on their way right now. And once they get here, I'll make them into Ladybug and Cat-sickles."

"Ooh, Do those c-c-c-come in different flavors? I'm p-p-partial to orange, myself."

Frozer's eyes went wide as he spun around to see none other than Ladybug and Chat Noir in the flesh.

Frozer smirked. "Well, if it isn't Paris' favorite pair of pipsqueak protectors. Come to see me turn Paris into my own winter wonderland?"

"Sorry, Frozer, but we're here to serve you a piping hot plate of justice," said Ladybug.

"Ooh," said Chat. "G-Great one-liner, m'lady."

"Yeah," said Frozer with a grin. "Great one-liner. I'd even say it was COOL!"

FWOOSH!

With one swift motion, Frozer sent a barrage of sharp icicles flying toward the heroes.

"M'lady, look out!" Chat exclaimed.

As he did, he pushed Ladybug and himself out of the way, only getting half of his tail cut off.

"Yikes!" said Ladybug. "Chaton, are you okay?!"

Chat picked himself up. "I'm alright, m'lady. J-J-J-Just a little winter wardrobe malfunction."

Ladybug would have made a witty reply, but she and Chat found themselves dodging another icy blast as Frozer continued his assault. It was one dodge after another in what almost felt like a dance for survival. Ladybug even caught herself doing a pirouette.

"You kids are good," said Frozer, "Would have made some excellent students if the city hadn't decided to RUIN MY LIFE!!"

As the villain ranted, Ladybug and Chat took cover behind a frozen bus.

"I think now would b-b-be a pretty good time for one of your lucky charms, m'lady," said Chat.

"Right," said Ladybug as she drew her yo-yo. "LUCKY CHARM!"

With a burst of energy and a flash of light, a large bag of salt materialized before them.

"A bag of salt?" Ladybug pondered.

"Of course," said Chat. "When salt d-d-dissolves, the sodium and chloride separate and..."

Chat's statement found itself cut short when an icicle pierced the ground in front of him, forcing him and Ladybug to move.

"Layman's terms?" Ladybug asked.

"Salt melts ice," said Chat. "Quick, toss me the bag."

Ladybug tossed Chat the bag, but as she did, she couldn't help but worry.

'Does he know what he's doing?' she thought.

However, just before he rushed off, Chat gave her a wink and a smirk. Her fears were put to rest.

'Oh,' she thought. 'He definitely knows what he's doing.'

Once he was close enough, Chat opened the bag, and did what he did best. He ran his mouth.

"Hey, F-F-F-Frozer, next time, try for a more original gimmick," he said. "There's, like, a dozen ice-themed supervillains already."

Frozer snarled. "You're judging me?! Who's the one running around in a kitty costume?!"

"No judgment," Chat said with a shrug. "I'm just... I'm just saying. Ice-themed villains are a dime a dozen."

Frozer's temper flared as he kept blasting at the young hero, only for him to dodge every shot

"Oops, touched a nerve. You know, for an ice villain, you're a real hothead," said Chat.

"You insolent little whelp!" Frozer exclaimed. "When I'm done with you, there won't be enough of you to fit in an ice tray."

Chat chuckled. "You know, I think you need t-t-to lighten up. No need to let a few jokes make you SALTY."

Salt was sprinkled all over the villain in the blink of an eye, and whatever wasn't on him made it to the ice beneath his feet. The once-solid ice became a pile of slush, and the villain would find himself hitting the ground with a painful THUD.

"Ladybug, now!" Chat exclaimed.

Ladybug wasted no time, skating as fast as her skates could carry her. She rushed over and snatched the earrings from Frozer's ears, smashing them until the Akuma finally emerged.

"No more evil-ding for you, little Akuma," she said with a swing of her yo-yo. "TIME TO DE-EVILIZE!"

The butterfly was captured, cleansed, and set free.

"Bye-bye, little butterfly," said Ladybug. "MIRACULOUS LADYBUG!!"

She tossed the empty bag of salt in the air, and in an instant, Paris went from a frozen wasteland to the City of Love again. Frozer transformed back into Phillipe, who couldn't help but shed a tear.

"I meant no harm," he said. "I was just trying to save my business, my dream."

Chat stepped up. "I'm sure a few more c-c-customers and a good lawyer can help. Your dream doesn't have to be over yet."

"Chat Noir's right," said Ladybug. "In fact, maybe we can help. We've pushed a product or two in the past."

"You two would do that for me? Oh, merci, Ladybug, merci beaucoup," said Phillipe as he picked himself up.

Ladybug nodded. "Whatever we can do to help."

With everything settled, Ladybug and Chat ended the mission with their signature fist bump.

"Bien Joué!"

Luka stood outside the locker rooms of the ice rink, conflicted.

'She's right in there,' he thought. 'You could just knock on the door, ask her to come out, and talk about it.”

Did Luka really want this? Did he want to risk breaking Adrien’s heart by asking Marinette out? It’s not like Adrien couldn’t find someone else, right? Then again, he knew for a fact that Adrien and Marinette loved each other. Did he really want to disrupt that? This debate went back and forth as his hand unconsciously moved toward the locker room door. That’s when he heard a loud “Ahem.” He turns to see an irritated-looking Kagami Tsurugi, causing him to gulp.

"Kagami, I swear, this isn't what it looks like..."

"I hope not," said Kagami. "Because it looked like you were about to be a total scumbag."

Luka threw up his hands in defense. "I was just going to knock, that's all."

"And then what?"

Luka sighed. That one question managed to put an end to Luka's mental debate.

"You know, for a second, I really was ready to disrupt their melody, just to be with Marinette," he said. "But I can't... No matter how much I want to."

"I know the feeling. Part of me wants Adrien more than anything, but he's chosen his target, and it's not me."

Luka exhaled. "Yeah. But hey, it's not that bad, right? I mean, they make each other happy."

"Yeah... Yeah, you're right," said Kagami. "And besides, there are plenty of fish in the sea, right?"

"Exactly. I ought to know. I live on a boat," said Luka.

Kagami shook her head. She could tell Luka was prouder of that joker than he had any right to be. Still, the point was as clear as crystal. Marinette and Adrien were meant for each other, and Kagami and Luka's destiny lied elsewhere. As this thought began to sink in, Marinette and Adrien emerged from the girl's and boy's locker rooms respectively. Without missing a beat, Kagami and Luka rushed to them.

"Are you okay, Mari?"Luka asked. "You're not hurt, are you?"

Marinette blushed and smiled. "I'm okay. No harm done."

Luka felt a wave of relief was over him. Meanwhile, Adrien was being inspected from head to toe by Kagami and Gorilla, causing his face to turn a bashful pink.

"I-Is this n-n-necessary?" Adrien asked.

"Hold still," said Kagami. "Gotta make sure you're okay."

Adrien shooed their hands away. "I'm fine. Really."

"Hey, don't you dismiss me," said an irritated Kagami. "I was worried."

"I know. I'm s-s-s-sorry. But really, I-I'm okay."

Kagami smiled. Everything seemed to wrap up nicely until Kagami caught Adrien and Marinette awkwardly avoiding each other's eye contact. She groaned softly, growing weary of this emotional rollercoaster, but then, with the ding of a phone notification, Kagami got an idea.

"Hey, Luka, my ride is here. You need a lift home?" she said with a wink.

"O-Oh, yeah, sure. Thanks," said Luka. "I'll get my things."

Adrien and Marinette's faces both went pale as they heard their friends' plan. Adrien shot a desperate look to Kagami, and Marinette to Luka. Both expressions screamed, "Please don't leave!" But these pleas fell on deaf ears, for better or worse, as Luka mouthed 'Good luck' to Marinette and Kagami mouthed 'You've got this' to Adrien. Without another word, the heiress and the musician were out the door, and Marinette and Adrien were left alone.

Adrien could already feel himself starting to shake. Left alone with his crush. What was he to do? He couldn't just run. What would she think of him? But that blunder they had on the ice was just so awkward, so embarrassing, how could they even hope to address it? Then again, if they didn't talk about it, would anything change? That's when Adrien made his decision. He took a deep breath, forced himself to stop shaking, and looked at Marinette.

"Hey, M-M-Marinette..."

Marinette gulped. "H-Hey, Adrien..."

"About what happened on the ice," he said. "I'm really s-s-s-sorry. I was... I was caught up in what I was doing, and..."

"No, no, no, I'm sorry. It was my fault," she said before chuckling. "Clumsy ol' Marinette, right? You're fine, really."

"You're not that clumsy all the t-t-t-time. Besides, I'm... I'm the one who got on the ice without knowing the first thing about skating."

"Yeah, but this was my idea, and..." Marinette said before shaking her head. "You know what, this is silly, letting a little spill embarrass us so much. Accidents happen, right?"

Adrien gave a sigh of relief. "Yeah, yeah. Accidents. That's all that was. An accident."

Marinette blushed. "So maybe, if you want, we can do this again?"

"Yeah," said Adrien with glowing, pink cheeks. "I-I'd like that."

Just then, Adrien felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked to see his bodyguard tapping his wristwatch.

"Oops, that's right. I have to go," said Adrien.

Marinette then looked at her phone. "My ride's here too. Have a good night, Adrien."

The two youngsters parted ways. Both seemed calm, but they were doing cartwheels and backflips in their heads. Despite the awkwardness and embarrassment, both were excited to see each other again. A small victory. One both Marinette AND Adrien hoped would lead to something more.

Prev | Next

[dark-elf-writes]

Hi! I’m quite bored right now and am in the mood for Gossip. So if your agreeable I’d like to ask you + your followers some questions. You can answer one, none, all, or whichever ones you want.

1. What’s an unfortunate piece of knowledge that you have?

2. Does your family have any secrets you don’t mind sharing?

3. What’s the weirdest/funniest reason you’ve broken up with someone/someone’s broken up with you?

4. If you had to get any body modification, what would it be?

5. Is there any funny/dramatic event that happened in your friend group/ a friend group you know of?

6. Is there a story you’ve been wanting to share but haven’t had the chance to?

7. Whose the strangest person you know and how?

8. Is there any drama/event you haven’t been able to stop thinking about?

:D

Oooo this is fun let’s see

I have many but right now the only fun fact going through my head is that snakes have two dicks. I blame Dimension 20 and Hank Green for that being so readily available in my head and that I can’t think of anything else

Most of my family secrets are A Lot™️ and also very recognizable but for a tamer one? Not so much a secret as a weird tradition that makes no sense , my family does a “hunt” where you go run around in the woods looking for a fake creature as a right of passage for kids and people marrying in. It’s just a silly goofy thing that we don’t tell people about because it’s a surprise.

GOD I have so many breakup stories. The crowning achievement was one time I got broken up with because I was going to an anime convention that I told him about moths in advance and he didn’t want me “dressing like a slut for a bunch of nerds”. Jokes on him I had a great time and got laid by an incredibly attractive Deadpool cosplayer so like who was the real winner

Besides top surgery? I want pointy ears. I want to be an elf so bad. Let me be an elf.

So many. One of the stupider ones was beef over Sherlock. I don’t remember what it was about it was so long ago.

Oooo I have a lot of weird stories but I’ve shared a lot. Um. Might have told this one already but. One year when we had a snow storm on Halloween I was driving back from work when my car’s computer (how it was explained to me. Basically just the thing that tells the car it is running while it’s running) fried itself while I was driving. I pulled into a side road right Inc. don’t of a burger king with no power steering or anything and waited for my stepdad to come help. The problem? We had to push the car into the burger king parking lot and I was in five inch heels and a tiny Wednesday Addams dress with no coat. In 0 degree weather. We made it three steps before two massive “clearly works out on the nearby farms” looking guys jumped out of their F150 mid getting their food to help. I got several lectures about proper winter attire. The fact that I pulled out a massive Star Trek blanket from my backseat didn’t help for some reason. But I still picked that damn car in heels in snow and ice and deserve acknowledgment for that tbh.

Strange just by being kind of weird? Me. But if I’m not included there was a guy that worked with my dad that I called Scary Larry (he was probably not scary but he was over six feet tall and loud and I was a tiny undiagnosed neurodivergent child) he smoked three packs of cigarettes a day and the first house I ever broke into was his trailer when I was like eight when he and my dad boosted me through a window and I fell into a four foot tall wall of cassette tapes

Globally? No. Personally? Two people in my family have broken up with a partner they lived with, didn’t move out, and the ex’s new partner moved in with them in the worst roommate situation I can imagine. Two. Two separate people. I was baffled when it happened once!

[its-a-hil]

ok. random question. literally from the random question generator at randomwordgenerator dot cahm: What's your go-to funny story now, but was horrendous at that moment?

(i think it gave me a question i already know but eh shoot)

hm.

alright i think this is actually more of the reverse than the forward direction, but sure

when i was in middle school, i was such a horrible procrastinator (note: i am still one of those) that i often wrote rough drafts of essays during lunch

(the one year in middle school i didnt do this was when i had english 1st period. tbh i wish my schedule had worked out like that all 3 years, but alas)

but i got so comfortable just throwing out words with a pencil that i kept doing it and now i almost never edit anything bc i need to write it all in one go or it's wrong

but final drafts still had to be typed & printed, so it was only my rough drafts that were like this

fast forward to high school, and rough drafts became less of a thing

my compulsion to procrastinate did not.

oh also relevant here is that i was emotionally incapable of asking for an extension or submitting online after class or anything

so.

senior year of high school. we had an essay to write on Twelfth Night, where we had to pick a word that was repeated a few times and discuss its effect on the story

i picked 'fancy' and used it to argue the absolute bullshit point that it meant the whole thing was a dream, because i had no other ideas and my brain refused to set aside time to do something more reasonable

except.

i did not begin writing until lunch of that day.

i did not have access to the computer lab i had planned to write the essay in.

i pleaded with a friend to lend me his laptop, on which i did the most frantic writing of my life. i dont remember if i ate any food during that lunch period.

(according to my diary i also said something shitty to that friend even as he was doing me a massive favor, which. god.)

looking at the document now (ty google drive), it seems that i didnt actually finish the essay, just wrote notes on the different uses of the word

im not sure if it was just a rough draft or notes kind of thing that was due, or if i lucked out and the essay was extended or something? unclear

but what is clear is that i wrote 440 words in just over an hour, and that's not counting the quotes i had to transcribe (which also made up over 400 words)

the following night i turned it into an actual 750ish word essay in also about an hour, bc. yeah. (i still didn't write an intro until i printed it out during study hall the next day lmao)

so anyway the essay was shit, the teacher was genuinely confused and pulled me aside after the class where she handed the essays back

note: she was also the theater teacher & that semester i was doing the play afterschool, and i think she knew i was better than what i handed in

:/

in my defense i was fairly depressed that couple of months, partially due to an responsibility that i did not realize i could easily say no to. the only consequence that refusing that responsibility would have had is that i would have hated myself less and possibly liked engineering more

oh also looking at my diary apparently that was also the week that i taught precalc bc the teacher's partner was suddenly out for paternity leave and i had an essentially free period during the precalc class

so yeah that's probably the third most interesting week of my senior after the week that we had the play performances and the week i was out in the hospital when my lungs spontaneously collapsed

the funniest part of that story is that it took me another 3ish years to realize that i wanted to be a teacher, and another 2 years after that to act on that desire. lmao

anyway bc im sure you freaks want to see it, im putting the essay under the cut

Actual essay:

Twelfth Night is one of Shakespeare’s most fantastical plays. Even without the use of magic, the supposedly realistic events are completely improbable. There is evidence that the play was intended to be a fantasy, and throughout the play, the word “fancy” is used to suggest to the audience that the events of the play are little more than a fanciful construction of Orsino’s mind. 

Orsino speaks four of the six instances of “fancy” or “fantasy.” Two of these instances come in his first monologue, right at the beginning of the play. He claims that “so full of shapes is fancy that it alone is high fantastical” (1.1.14-15). As Adams says, in this passage Orsino claims “that his own imagination is so fertile that it is supremely capricious and whimsical.” (Adams 58). It is odd that the play would start with this double mention of fancy, especially when the word is not mentioned again until the end of Act two. It is even stranger that the plot concludes with Orsino making Viola/Cesario his “fancy’s queen” (5.1.415). Although Feste finishes the play with his final song, this line is the last spoken by any other character, and is a natural conclusion to the play nonetheless. There must be a reason why the play both begins and ends with a word only used six times throughout. This is the most direct clue that the play does not merely describe events in Shakespeare’s mind, but instead describes events in Orsino’s mind. 

More clues can be found by examining the other uses of fancy in the play. Sebastian remarks “Let fancy still my sense in Lethe steep” after encountering a smitten, and unfamiliar Olivia (4.1.65). This line comes in one of the more fantastical scenes in the play, where Sebastian enters Illyria and is mistaken by everyone for Cesario. Sebastian can only conclude “this is a dream,” and calls upon fancy - imagination - to keep him from waking up. Sebastian addresses fancy as a powerful being, that has the ability to manipulate the world he sees. If the play does take place in Orsino’s imagination, fancy would have this power. Another thing to note about Sebastian’s mention of fancy is that it is in reference to Olivia. Her love for him, and reproach of the men who were dueling him, is the only reason he would want to continue living in this dream.

Olivia is a common subject of fancy, as used in its alternate definition of love. Malvolio, just before seeing Maria’s letter, thinks aloud that “should [Olivia] fancy, it should be one of my complexion” (2.5.24-25). Almost all references to fancy are directly related to Olivia. In fact, every major male character, except her uncle, is in love with Olivia. It is difficult for Orsino to conceive of a character who is not enamored when in the presence of the beautiful lady Olivia.  To him, when Olivia enters, “heaven walks on earth” (5.1.99). 

Regarding the rest of Malvolio’s scene, it is no less strange than Sebastian’s. The dour puritan begins with a statement of love for his lady, and then follows the insane directions of a letter that apparently describes her love for him, while the pranksters hide and watch in a nearby bush. Orsino’s mentions of “fancy” also take place in strange scenes. Without touching on the chaotic mess that is 5.1, 1.1 regards a Duke, who has been laid low grieving over his unrequited love for Olivia. She, in turn, decides not to admit any suitors until she has spent seven entire years mourning her dead brother. This scene feels almost surreal, setting the stage for the play that is to follow. Since almost every instance of the word fancy comes during a surreal scene, it can be inferred that the word is an indicator - a message to the audience that this play is a fantasy in the mind of Orsino.

There is one more use of “fancy,” however. During the argument between Orsino and Viola, Orsino speaks of men’s fancies as “more longing, wavering… than women’s are” (2.4.41-42). Twelfth Night is certainly long, spanning three months in Illyria, and the play constantly wavers from uplifting to demeaning, from reasonable to insane. The play as a whole fits so well with Orsino’s description of his “fancies” that one must wonder why that particular description was used. Interpreting Twelfth Night as a fancy conjured up by Orsino’s stricken mind makes a good deal more sense than attempting to reconcile the events with the real world. 

Work Cited:Adams, B. (1978). Orsino and the Spirit of Love: Text, Syntax, and Sense In Twelfth Night, I. i. 1-15. Shakespeare Quarterly,29(1), 52-59. doi:10.2307/2869169

The notes i wrote during the lunch period:

The first appearance of the word comes during Orsino’s monologue. The grief-stricken man describes his lovesickness by referring to his imagining of fantasies involving Olivia. Fancy is “full of shapes” to hear him tell it, filled with all kinds of images (1.1.14). This implies an interesting idea of the plot; it may be nothing more than a lovesick dream conjured by Orsino’s mind. After all, the plot is as “high fantastical” as something a distressed lover might imagine. (1.1.15). 

Malvolio’s mention of fancy is also about love and imagining it. He talks about “her [Olivia’s] fancy,” but the context of the scene and the rest of his dialogue imply that he is the one who fancies Olivia (2.5.24).. Malvolio claims that Olivia has said she would fancy “one of my complexion,” indicating that Malvolio has, through confirmation bias and imagination, convinced himself that Olivia was in love with him even before reading Maria’s letter (2.5.25). The fact that Malvolio, the outwardly stalwart Puritan, is as fanciful and in love as Orsino is a strong device for making fun of the Puritans as Shakespeare was wont to do. 

Sebastian has his reference to fancy when he meets Olivia and finds that he is the object of her fancy. 

[Discussing of the other two quotes]

In Twelfth Night, characters mention fancy when in fantastical scenes. Orsino had neglected his duties as a Duke to be lovesick over Olivia, Malvolio convinced himself that Olivia was in love with him moments before happening upon a letter regarding Olivia’s love, Sebastian came to a foreign city and found that a woman he had never seen was madly in love with him, and the final scene is perhaps the most fanciful of them all. Everything comes together in a hilarious, satisfying, and utterly unrealistic way. The use of the word fancy indicates that a scene either was or will be fanciful. This implies that Shakespeare is breaking the fourth wall, drawing attention to works of the imagination when the audience may be considering the play as imagination. In that way, Shakespeare implies that this comedy, however nice it may seem, is just a lovesick fantasy in the mind of Duke Orsino. 

Note also that almost every mention of the word is in reference to Olivia. The only exception is when Orsino calls Viola his “fancy’s queen,” but Orsino could just be (Inception-style) trying to prove to himself that he can love another. That is why the timeline does not make sense; Orsino needed to believe that his mind was not so changeable, that he would need three months with another woman to move past his love for Olivia. 

Quotes:

1.1.14-15:

Orsino: “So full of shapes is fancy 

That it alone is high fantastical.”

Context: These lines conclude Orsino’s opening monologue about his lovesickness and passion for Olivia. The monologue is discordant throughout, and this line sounds very arrogant, that nobody but a lover could have an extreme imagination.

This quote illustrates Orsino’s arrogance about his position (which is expanded upon in his later argument with Viola) and tells the audience that Orsino has spent some time cooped up in his mansion thinking of Olivia. 

2.5.23-25

Malvolio: “I have heard herself come

thus near, that, should she fancy, it should be one

of my complexion.“

Context: This comes just before Malvolio finds Maria’s letter, when he is fancying that Olivia might be in love with him. He has almost convinced himself of her love even before he sees Maria’s letter, which would be a strange coincidence if Twelfth Night was not a comedy. 

This quote describes Malvolio’s desperation to be loved by Olivia. He uses a few choice words and actions of Olivia as a justification for her love, indicating confirmation bias and lack of perspective. 

4.1.63-66

Sebastian: “What relish is in this? how runs the stream?

Or I am mad, or else this is a dream:

Let fancy still my sense in Lethe steep;

If it be thus to dream, still let me sleep!”

Context: This comes just after Sebastian enters Illyria and finds a beautiful woman suddenly wish to marry him. It is so illogical that he believes he must be dreaming, and he wishes for fancy to keep him from waking up. 

This quote tells us that Sebastian is wondrous at his entrance to Illyria. He forgets about Antonio as soon as strange men wish to duel and a strange beautiful woman claims to be in love with him. Sebastian is far more relaxed than most people would be in this context, especially if they could not find Antonio, the only person he was close with for the past three months.

5.1.412-415

Orsino: “Cesario, come;

For so you shall be, while you are a man;

But when in other habits you are seen,

Orsino's mistress and his fancy's queen.”

Context: This is the last line spoken by any character except Feste. It comes after Orsino learns of Viola’s true identity and gives up his love for Olivia. 

This quote implies that Orsino still thinks of Viola as Cesario, at least while she is in men’s clothing. 

[average-guy-reviews]

Eddie Fortune is 'Single' (and a little bit gay)

Live at the Liverpool Royal Court Studio, February 2023.

THE VENUE:

The Studio at the Royal Court is a basement venue with a stage at one end, banked seating at the back, and to each side of the room, and space on the floor for tables and chairs. It's a really nice, simple, venue and is great for a stand up comedy evening. Having seen Eddie perform here I think it's easy to see that it was a perfect venue for him and his solo show.

SUPPORT ACTS:

Danny Davies: did a short set about the reasons he had to stop smoking weed. Overall he was really funny. One particular section about his fear of robots and his dog 'talking' to him had me laughing out loud. I don't know how long he's been doing stand up but I can see a pretty solid future ahead of him. I'd happily watch him again.

Adam Rohan: is a flamboyant gay comedian, which runs right through the centre of his comedy. It may just be me, as I heard others laughing more than I did, but I did find Danny the funnier of the two support acts. Adam is a potential star though, I think. The building materials are definitely there, and I think if I see him again in a year or so I'll be laughing my ass off.

THE MAIN SHOW.

Eddie came on stage in Whitney Houston t-shirt. He was sweating and the t-shirt was damp and he made a Whitney in the bath joke. I don't say this as a bad thing because it was fucking hilarious. I tell you this to give you an idea of how Eddie works. He has a lot of levels in his performance and the Whitney joke was a great test of the audience, to see where they stood humourwise. Thankfully we all reacted really well. It was a healthy start to the set.

The audience was a pretty handy crowd for the majority of the gig, though some of them did get a bit chatty in the last few minutes. Overall though it was a solid bunch. They reacted in ways Eddie did not expect at times. The biggest reaction that surprised him was when he was talking about one of his partners and referred to his 'leather cheerio'. Everyone got it and everyone was laughing hard. It almost threw him for a minute as he really hadn't seen that reaction coming.

He pulled it back and rallied on, giving me one of the funniest nights out I have had in a long time. My personal favourite part was the Karen Erotic Novel excerpt he had written. He read it out after describing a woman he had run into on a train. He started reading it, and it seemed as though every single person in that room knew where it was going. The vividness of the descriptions in what he read show that he is actually a pretty fine master of the written word, even if the subject matter is the smallest bit weirdly, and disturbingly, arousing.

His performance flows really well, pausing only to talk down any hecklers that might try to interrupt. Thankfully there weren't too many of them. But this is a part of what makes his stage presence work so well. His interactions with the audience are really personal, and funny as fuck. There was one crack about older guys driving a blue Ford focus, and one guy in the audience did. Throughout the show Eddie slipped in the ford focus occasionally, and each time locked eyes with the guy in the audience. It was a really nice touch.

This is my first time reviewing a live gig and I know there's things I've missed, or moments I've forgotten, but my style will improve the more of these I do. Overall Eddie is a bloody good comedian. He's funny, self-deprecating, outrageous, flamboyant but, most importantly, he is a likeable guy, and you feel like you get to know him really well when you listen to his jokes and stories. If you've ever seen him perform you'll know, and if you haven't then you should.

[kittenwalker]

just evan talking about reader in an interview with Jimmy fallon and him being hellaaaaaaaa whipped for her and everyone is like Awwwwwweeeeee

you asked and shall receive :)

notes : imagine this story being put in 2019 after evan filmed for dark phoenix. Also I'm starting to get more time to write so expect more stuff to come ;) enjoy xxx

“ Hello everyone! Welcome to tonight’s show hosted by me, Jimmy Fallon. Tonight we have a special guest who so kindly flew all the way here to New York City. Now put your hands together for… Evan peters! “

Evan came out from behind the curtains and gave a wave as he walked out, sitting down on the famous blue chair beside Jimmy’s desk. The applause started to lower down as Jimmy spoke.

“ Okay, we only have about 30 minutes with Evan today as he is busy. So we are going to speed things up a little during tonight’s show. Alright, welcome Evan it is really nice to have you here today despite your busy day. Let’s start off with your experience in New York City, how is it so far? “

“ Well I’m a hot mess, I landed here at about 5 in the morning and was really jet-lagged. But other than that I’m having a great time here, I also did uh explore some of the cool places around New York. Like Central Park, The Metropolitan Museum Of Arts and Time Square. I’m actually leaving tomorrow morning and uh am going to definitely miss the drunken people on the streets who always bump into me. “ Evan joked, making the crowd and Jimmy laugh.

“ It’s nice to know that you are enjoying your time here in the city I grew up in, but now let’s jump into your newest movie you filmed for. In Dark Phoenix you acted as Peter Maximoff and there are a lot of cool moments for your character but one thing I’m most curious about is when Peter runs and his face gets all dented, how does that work? “

“ Alright, so basically a guy with a leaf blower literally just blows the strong air onto my face while I’m running on a treadmill. It’s definitely was um one of the most uncomfortable but funniest things I have done so yea that’s kinda how it works. “ he explained with a smile

After hearing Evan’s response, the audience burst out laughing and applause for him. Making Evan himself laugh at the funny memory. They talked a little more about his character and his experience on set and being in his last X-men movie. Until Jimmy checked his watch and saw he had about 12 minutes left and decided to move to his last question. Jimmy pulled out a board with an Instagram post printed onto it. It was Y/n’s post, Evan’s girlfriend, it captioned ‘ Happy 4th anniversary my love ‘ while the picture was her licking sauce off his lips as Evan made a goofy face.

“ So um what is happening in this picture? “ Jimmy asked, chuckling at the funny photo.

Evan burst out into a bright smile, which is very contagious, while putting a hand over his forehead and shaking his head. Y/n showed him the picture that day and told him she was going to post it, but he thought she was joking not knowing she actually posted it.

“ So uh it was our 4th anniversary a few days ago and of course, we went to celebrate it. We went to lunch first and I ordered some mushroom soup, when I was drinking it some of the soup got onto my mouth. Then she came over to my side and just licked it off while snapping a picture of it, yea the story is exactly what the post shows you. Also after that, I surprised her by driving her back to where we had our first date. It was a drive-in movie theatre and we kinda just sat in the car while watching a rom-com. It felt very nostalgic and nice, like going full circle. “ Evan told the story while smiling to himself as the great memories flowed back.

“ Woah that is very thoughtful of you and sounds like the perfect anniversary night “

“ Well yea because I’m the best boyfriend “ he joked with a smug face

The crowd laughed and some agreed with him.

“ No no of course I’m joking, it’s all Y/n she deserved it. She really is the best partner I could ever ask for. Y/n is very caring and would always make me dinner, take care of me when I’m sick and would always be by my side. During my Kai Anderson days, whenever I came back home from uh a hard shooting day she would either listen to my rants then make me a bubbly bath. Or when I don’t really feel like talking she would put on a movie and we would cuddle while watching it. Y/n is really like a gift sent from god for me and I’m very grateful I laid my eyes on the most beautiful person and initiated the first move. “ Evan could go on forever about his love.

The audience awed and clapped their hands as he said his sweet warm speech dedicated to his darling, Y/n.

“ You must love her a lot Evan, I’m glad you found the right person but it’s now sadly the end of our time. It was my pleasure to have you here to chat with us, and everyone that’s Evan Peters! Go watch Dark Phoenix, streaming in theatres now! “

-

A few hours after the interview

Y/n was scrolling on her phone, finding a video to entertain herself while she does a few chores. Scrolling through her recommendation page until she stumbled upon something which caught her eye, Evan’s interview with Jimmy. She forgot Evan had travelled to New York City to do a Tonight Show with him, 10 hours ago it stated. It’s quite recent so she decided the chores could wait awhile, she had to watch her love first.

Sitting down on the couch she intently watched the 10 minute long clip, until it was when she reached the near end of the video. Y/n listened to his loving words about her as he looked so passionate while talking about her. She was so touched by his words it brought tears to her eyes without her even knowing. His words really did something to Y/n, made her heart burst and made her stomach do flips just like the first time she met him.

Y/n knew he was the one. The light to her darkness, the one she’s going to marry and spend her forever with. The one who makes her forget everything when he smiles or does the smallest things. The man who makes her feel like she’s having a teenage crush all over again. The man named Evan Peters.

[unadulterated-syd]

Giving Up On Your World

Regulus x Dead!Y/n

Warnings: Angst, slight mentions of su!cide nothing explicit but metaphorical mentions.

I wrote this like a year ago, Its probably very out of character but I was sad when I wrote this! I love Regulus so very much 😭. And this is short!

Perhaps the sky above couldnt really save him from the fact. Y/n, his best friend, his lover, the funniest person he'd ever known, was gone. Forever. And to his own ideas, it was his fault.

His head ached, the room spinning, his fists clenched against his slacks. Y/n used to always tease him about his constant need to dress 'fancy'. In a way he wish he'd taken Y/n's advice and dressed like an 80s virgin. That's what Y/n would've called it, anyway.

"Are you sure?" He was sure this was at least the 3rd time he'd asked his older brother this. It broke his brother all the same, "Yes. You need rest, Regulus. Please." But it wasn't enough for him, he didn't want to rest without Y/n, he didn't want to laugh without Y/n, he didn't want to walk the same Earth Y/n did without Y/n.

Lily, James, Sirius, anyone remotely close to Y/n or himself attended the funeral. That's how Y/n was. Y/n was someone no one could forget, no matter what conversation you'd had with Y/n you remembered. He also knew Y/n's irrational fear of death, the poor thing had been terrified, cried everytime a new year passed, and here he was alive without Y/n.

The thing he hated the most was what had happened, Y/n held his hand and cooed him through death, even though he had never been close to dying in that moment. Y/n always put him on the front burner, it was one thing that made him feel so guilty yet so loved.

As the night faded, and the sun came up it was just him, his brother, and a gravestone. "Regulus, we should go..Y/n needs rest." Sirius knew the man in front of him would never take that as a good reason, obviously the dead aren't sleeping, but he still had to try. He was his big brother after all.

Regulus put a finger up, a finger that said a million words without a noise. Sirius left him, giving him the second alone he'd requested, but he stayed near by out of pure need to keep Regulus safe.

"I suppose this is a second good bye." He cleared his throat, keeping his voice from breaking, "Even now you choke me up, Y/n. I'm sorry. I promised you'd live forever, I promised myself I'd go first to show you it wasn't all that bad. And yet here I am, and there you are." He paused once more, pulling out a singular Pansy from his pocket, "I know you never liked flowers, you said they weren't worth the money, but I think this is a special occasion."

Regulus stood up, looking down on his partner's grave, and sighed. "I love you. I'm sorry I never got the chance to say it back in person." He took one last shakey breath, and set the flower down, "If there ever was a heaven I know you'd be there. I'll see you someday, soon hopefully, my love."

And he set off towards Sirius. They went home in silence, Hogwarts was over for them, it was a journey they'd never thought they'd be in together. Everything they'd planned, Regulus and Y/n, ending with Sirius and Regulus driving no where in particular.

The worse part for Regulus was watching James and Lily from there. They were so in love. Y/n's brother, happy and healthy with someone he loved, and Y/n dead with him left alone. He'd never hate the two, but he'd always envy them.

He began his work for the ministry until his own death came. Perhaps he had never been happier to go, he'd always wanted to go, since Y/n had, but he had never wanted to do it himself, he didn't want Y/n to feel worse about dying than Y/n already would have.

Now it was Sirius crying at his grave. Life has one cruel sense of humor and Sirius had now been dealt this hand twice. Y/n had been his best friend as well, James and Lilly long gone, and now, his baby brother.

"I've never been happier to have the world leave you behind, my love. " Regulus looked at the one who he'd been searching for, for years, the voice of reason to the chaos of himself, Y/n.

Maybe death wasn't all that scary.

[bisexual-horror-fan]

Random Billy And Stu Headcannons I Have.

Sunny or @polyghostfacehours and I were talking about the boys like we always do and she liked these and told me to post em and I thought eh fuck it, why not! Have some random headcanons. No real warnings, most of these are random, mostly soft, domestic with a little spice.

---

-Stu has, shockingly, so many opinions on music, like so many, like you could bring up nearly any band and he has an opinion in some fashion, even something as simple as he doesn't like the bands name, or if he realllly likes or realllly hates a certain song, if he likes their overall vibe or presentation, he just has Opinions.

"Fucking, Deep Blue Something? How lame is that shit?! They can't even pick something to BE deep and blue. Wishy washy bullshit, indecision in a band personified. Like have an identity and maybe we could talk."

-Billy prefers hardwood floors, this seems soooo random I know, but he really prefers hardwood wherever he lives. He likes that he can have the option to change without much commitment if that makes sense? Throw a rug down and call it good if you are worried about your feet getting cold, and you can change a rug with like no effort and it can totally change the whole vibe and feel of a room.

-While Billy adores lingerie, so fucking much, all kinds and colors and fabrics, you know what really gets him? Seeing you in one of Stu's sweaters and nothing else. Holding you and feeling the material, how warm you are, and if you stole it off Stu so it still kinda smells like him AND you? God he is soft for that.

-Stu loves cuddling on the couch so much it is stupid. You throwing your legs over his legs, him spooning you, just being as close as physically possible while watching something or gaming or whatever, he like needs it esp after a hard day

-Billy notices the taste of whatever you wear every time you kiss. Whatever flavor of chapstick, lipgloss or lipstick and he has favorites and loves to like parse the meaning of it, even if you didn't explictly think about it before putting it on, he likes to put meaning to it, just a little quirk of his.

-Stu thinks about shit you say, all, the, time. He would talk you up just all the time to anyone who would listen? "My partner y/n, you know y/n, they said the funniest fucking thing the other day-"

-Underrated date you don't do often but both boys love, love love?! Brunch. A weekend brunch date? My God. Billy doesn't wanna call a spade a spade but that is what it is and when you are all out and doing it, he loves it but he doesn't wanna say it. "Yeah we did brunch on Sunday-" even tho he totally loves doing it, like bottomless mimosas and an omlette bar? Like uh duh, what isn't there to like?

-Speaking of breakfast I totally think Stu would some mornings just get in the mood and wake up and be taken with a craving and you come downstairs to him working and when you ask what he is doing he is like, "It's a bagel and lox kinda morning, you know?" and I mean you aren't gonna say no, so you sit down at the bar and watch him make it and talk to him as he does it and it is suuuuch a chill way to start the day. I fee like it isn't an all the time thing but sometimes Stu just WANTS a good bagel and lox, he had it on a trip with his folks to new york and got hooked.

-While Stu looves traveling. And Billy loves it too because of Stu spoiling him with it and exploring new places with you. Billy looooves a staycation like getting a hotel room in town or at most one town over and pretending like it is a trip away to some totally different place and just trying new shit that you've never gotten around to in the city you live in all the time and making new memories and finding new fave places to indulge in on the reg? He lives for it. Because you get the best of it both! Staying somewhere you don't live, trying new experiences and places, but with the familiarity and comfortability of it being the city you reside WITH the added bonus of getting reminders after it is over just driving by some place you made new memories? Perfect.

-STU IS THE BEST CONCERT BUDDY EVER. He will go to any show you want to, doesn't care, will put you on his shoulders so you can see, has water on hand, just loves the vibe and energy. Seeing you get hyped get HIM hyped. Also a post concert hook up is fucking amazing to him. All sweaty, make up running off and hardly able to get clothes off all the way, rushed and frantic and maybe a little tipsy.

-Sometimes you can't even make it home, alley of the venue being the scene of your hook up, skirt hiked up, back to brick as you hook up, arms around his neck, leg over his hip as he fucks into you, hands on your waist as he has you. Hoooot.

[spinster-sisters]

laughing too hard at the seonghwa bias ask!! what about headcanons about people who bias each ateez member, just for shits and giggles? (i think what people normally name this is ‘what your bias says about you’ or sumn like that? anywaysss)

Ask and you shall receive.

What your ateez bias says about you. According to me. An irrelevant bitch.

Before we begin i went kinda heavy with this so tread lightly so small trigger warning.

-

Hongjoong: ur into toxic people. Not that my beautiful baby is toxic, no no no. But a lot of your real life relationships probably treat u like shit, so you find his reliability and how strong he loves comforting. Also because of those less than ideal relationships, your better at over looking the things about him that would make others go eek, like the whole work a holic thing and the more than slight possessiveness because they pale in comparison to the shit your used to. In fact? You probably crave the idea of someone wanting you that much.

In a more lighthearted take you are probably one of the most interesting people to talk to. Probably have a million hobbies and great stories to tell. Your life is full of amazing experiences that other will love hearing about.

Seonghwa: abandonment issues. Perhaps have some problems in your home life that make you crave domestic things like fucking heroin because your own home is kinda whack. Seonghwa feels like home. Also you probably have a large personality, the kinda thing where people get tired of it kinda quickly and it leaves you feeling left out and alone. Basically you want a safe space to exist with someone who actually wants to be there with you. (This is a self call out)

Once again to ease the tension. You probably match his caring energy. You are amazing at looking after others and are very aware of the people around you. A people pleaser but in a good way. I dont want to say a natural leader cuz thats not it, but people tend to look to you when the going gets tough.

Yunho: how's your anxiety treating you? No seriously. Like you need his big golden retriever energy simply to get through the day. Yall know how he is just naturally amazing at everything? That is what your find so attractive about him. You want him to take you by the hand and lead you through all the problems in your life cuz he could do it so effortlessly. You need someone to come through and take all your cares away with a smile.

Your energy is unmatched. You are the type of person people just sort of like to be around. Supper soft and nice. Easiest person in the world to talk to its almost unfair. Probably extremely good at 1 or 2 very specific things that leave people in awe.

Yeosang: i promise you the world is not as bad as you think. Probably pretty nihilistic. Like if pessimism was a person, it would be you. Always expect the worst literally no matter what. His honesty is probably super comforting to you. You need someone to sit on your shoulder and remind you whats actually happening. You know how when you feel bad, it only pisses you off more when people say everything will be ok? Yeosang doesn't do that, he tells you the truth and thats what you need to hear. Basically Yeosang is a realist and you desperately need to be reminded that things are not as bad as they seem.

Funniest bitch alive no fucking cap. Perhaps a defense mechanism but we in a happy place now so let's not think about it. Probably supper relaxed and chill vibes. Ur invited to all the 🍃🍃 seshes.

San: you probably aren't used to having a lot. Whether it be a lot of things or a lot of people in your life. Its not like your not likeable or hard working cuz you definitely are, its just for whatever reason it constantly feels like everything you want is just barely out of reach. San is just special you know? Like he could be that one perfect thing in your life thats yours and only yours.

Supper energetic. Like literally. Your running around all excited and shit. Its v cute keep it up. Lil heart breaker too. Everyone wants to be your friend or to be your partner. Are genuinely always smiling even when your not feeling to great.

Mingi: oh baby who hurt you. Trust issues. Someone needs to give you a fucking HUG. Ima say that you just had one person in your life that really fucked you up. Friend or a significant other, it doesn't matter. You need someone like mingi who just had that incredibly pure and can do no wrong energy. Mingi is just so incredibly trustworthy, like absolutely anything you need from him he can provide. Your always on your guard with people and you need someone to just fucking rely on.

First off, has anyone every told you how pretty your smile is? Stunning. Probably likes naps far more than the average person. Also great sense of fashion. Idk yall just always look so correct? Even if its not whats exactly in style your whole look just matches your energy.

Wooyoung: your self esteem is not it. You probably have a large group of friends and you are constantly comparing yourself to them and others. Just take a break babe, your absolutely fine. You kinda look up to him. You want his confidence, his energy, his aura that seems to make everyone like him, you want people to look at you the way they look at him.

You know that song thats like "thats my best friend, she a real bad bitch" thats you. Could not possibly be bothered by shit. Like you handle everything. Even if its not the best solution, you still always have one. Brains always working a mile a minute.

Jongho: you hold yourself to a high standard. You get extremely upset with yourself when you don't succeed. Probably throw yourself full force into absolutely everything you do and its not healthy. Like your relationships may be suffering because you don't let yourself make time for them. He just, seems like the type to not only understand that drive you have, but also be willing to stick it out when the going gets tough.

Just a sweetheart. Probably have some cute ass hobby like baking. Music is your lifestyle. Like the rest of us listen for enjoyment, you listen because you need to. Like always have background noise going on.

[welkinsky]

Can I request Shisui Uchiha for your 100 follower event?? (I hope you write for him?!) And congrats for reaching this ☺️

Shisui Uchiha X Reader

Masterlist

A-Z Headcanon

Warning: 18+ Content

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Shisui is a very kind person and once you both and do it and you're all tired, he'll make sure that he gets all the things to you or will run a bath for both of you to relax if you have enough energy left. And before you come back the sheets are already changed.

B = Body part (Their favorite body part of their partner’s)

Your face. He LOVES to give you kisses all over your face. He adores it so much! Sometimes you catch him zoning out looking at your face in very serious conversations. Which you find adorable but others don't lol. He still can't help it.

You can accept waking up to him adoring or creasing your face in the morning. "You're doing it again" You say with a shy whining voice and cover your face.

He takes your hands off of your face and says in the same whining voice to mock you "Whaaat I like looking at your face, not my fault you're this pretty." And will probably laugh when you get even redder.

C = Cuddling

Oooh as much as he loves being the big spoon, also loves to just lay on top of you.

"Don't sleep again okay?" you asked him to which he answered "Yeah I'm not gonna sleep this time. So how was your day?"

If he's laying on top of you, he'll pass out mid-way your answer. He feels like he can let down his guard for once, it is soooo relaxing for him since he has to be on his toes the entire day.

D = Dirty Secret

He once walked in on you while you were pleasuring yourself. He wanted to but his eyes were stuck on you and the moment you moan his name. He had to go back and find a place to do, you-know-what.

He cannot confront you because it felt like he invaded your privacy.

E = Experience 

You could be his first. He is a ride or die kinda guy so he waited for the right one. You both experience new stuff together.

F = Favourite Position 

He likes you on top FOR SURE. Not a hard dom kind of guy *exceptions are there* so he loves it when you are in control but if you're too tired he WILL switch you over and give your a sweet kiss and then go hard, lol. That kiss was sorry for what is going to happen to you now.

G = Goofy

Okay, he IS THE FUNNIEST person you know. No cap. He has a good sense of humor and can make a good joke out of the most serious conversations to make you laugh. He also does it when you're too tense. Will MAKE a joke out of you being stressed! But he sometimes does this to hide how stressed HE is, so make sure to pay attention to him.

H = Hair 

Before you met him, it was a mess, almost a nest *oh that rhymes* Anyways, you introduced this guy to a thing called "conditioner" and bro his world turned upside down. Is so impressed with his own hair that he cannot stop playing with them as he talks in general.

I = Intimacy 

He is not much into PDA, not because he doesn't like it it is just that it doesn't occur to him. You take his hand he'll pull you in and walk with one hand across your shoulder. Kiss him on a cheek, he'll kiss you back on lips. So he has no problem with PDA he just doesn't remember if that makes sense.

Your emotional intimacy is something to envy. You two feel emotions so strongly for each other or for this relationship. If one is down then the other one CANNOT leave them or feels the worst for doing so. 

J = Jack Off 

Not that often, I mean he has YOU. But if you are on a mission or he is on a mission will do it and that too not that often.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

He likes it when you tease him in public. Because it is just the two of you who know what is going on and nobody else. He will smirk and won't take his eyes off you *and later won't take his hands off you*

Apart from that neck kisses turned him on too, the ones right under the ear.

L = Location (Favourite places to do they do)

He. Will. Take. You. Anywhere. I mean not literally but literally. The waiter is taking too long and you've been teasing him the entire day, a bathroom trip it is, you two are chilling on the top of the mountain, make-out session? No problem. he covers it up with "we only live once" every time.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

When you are nice to others. This really makes him realize how much of a gem you really are and you should be treated like one too. He'll be a soft romantic the entire day and a bit clingy too. Later at night, expect it too.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

When someone is being rude to you or hurting you in general. He is not particularly mad at you AT ALL. But it really pisses him off and he loses it. He is kind in general, so it really makes him feel bad when people aren't nice and especially to you.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Oh, he LOVES receiving it! Bro this man is a hard dom for this and this only. He loves it when you moan with him in your mouth and when you look up at him and see how much you are enjoying it. Keep eye contact with him and you'll receive it all back 100X, eye contact turns him on that much!

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

He loves to go fast and pound into you but if it is more of an emotional one, then he'll be slow but still hard and deep. He can't do it half-assed after all!

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He. Is. Always. Down. You have to mention it once and his 100% answer will be "Let's go, but where? Wait I know a spot"

No cap.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Again, he is not afraid to take risks, only if you're into it. But even if you are, he wants to make sure that you're privacy isn't compromised AT ALL.

S = Stamina 

The max you both went was 3 rounds and that is when you got tired. So chances are that he can go more, 4 maybe 5? It still is a mystery.

T = Toy

He likes handcuffs. He sometimes even use them when you're giving him oral. He likes to see how vulnerable you get and he is the one in control. But apart from that, he is open to anything.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He is not that much into him teasing you but you teasing him? Turns him on like hell! He'll get back to you by being rough when he finally gets the chance.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He only means enough for you to hear, his volume usually isn't that loud. He likes it when only you can hear it and bro, moan his name or moan in general in his ears and you are not going to walk straight the next day.

W = Wild Card (Just a random headcanon because I cannot think of anything starting with W)

He told you about the friend that he lost, pretty later in your relationship. You can see it on his face when he is sad or down about that. Just pull him in a hug and make him fall asleep or he won't stop thinking about it. He just wants your company, there is nothing that you or he can do to make it better than just you being with him.

X = X-Ray

He is kinda buffed. Like not hella buffed but still, he is. You love his chest muscles the most and his muscular arms hug too.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

He doesn't have it that often but a very normal and healthy one. Tease him and he'll be down to do it for the next 3 days.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

He can do it and then go on a mission, he doesn't get tired easily. So expect him to make sure that you're asleep and slide out to do a bit of paperwork. He never admits that he does and when you say that he does that he just cracks another joke and avoids the topic. He feels guilty about leaving you alone like that but he is not that free too so he needs to complete his work too.

[pridewishes]

hi! not sure if this is okay to send or if this is the kind of thing you're hoping for so feel free not to answer, but what are some little things you like about your partners? maybe like unique traits you love that they might not really think about! please gush as much as you'd like, we love love <3

this is lovely and cute. it's just me (host) answering for now since idk if anyone else feels comfortable or wants to talk and ill use emojis for my partners as to not just blurt out their names or anything personal <3 ill put this under a readmore since ik most followers don't care much abt this kinda thing

📼 - very bright to everyone and extremely friendly and caring. it does it's best with everything it encounters and always does it's very best to keep things on the brightside which I truly admire. he's always been a positive driving force for me and motivated me to do things with my life I never thought I was capable of

📿 - she's always doing her best to be a loving and positive beacon of light for people and it's very motivating. i admire that while they're very sweet they never let that make them a doormat for anyone and stands up for literally everyone. she's so strong and i want to be like her in that way.

💄 - my real evil villain wife but really she's just so kind deep down. she doesn't show it really to anyone but i know how soft her voice can get when she really cares and how gentle she gets. it's really nice to know how loved and well taken care of you are when with her. she always knows what to do and how to help and it's so comforting. whenever im stressed and tired i think she helps a lot with how affectionate she is to me

💼 - he's one of the most loving husband's anyone could ask for. he's amazing with kids and will always listen when you really need it. he's patient and funny and one of the best listeners. whenever i just want to decompress he's one i look to often. he's so kind and so sweet.

⚰️ - really i can think of not many people who get my deep interworkings quite like mun does. i know opposites attract but mun and i can relate to a lot of things about eachother but i think that really helps make us work. he's not afraid to give it to me straight and give me what i need to hear, not want to hear. they were there for me at my worst and i was there at their worst too but we worked on ourselves and are both amazing people now. im very proud of mun and everything mun's done to work on munself.

🔎 - afraid of their own shadow sometimes i think but one of the most clever people i know. they're very sweet and laugh at my jokes even if they aren't that good or I'm just being stupid. he's always looking at things from angles i never thought about and he's also another wonderful listener. you can tell them just about anything and they always offer ideas to help figure things out. he's very admirable and a wonderful sweet person

🩹 - as much as i think he wants to kill me he's one of the funniest people i know. he's very stubborn and can be jokingly mean but i always know he means well and wants to understand me. they're wonderful to share interests with and i think despite our joking banter we get along well and share some very deep things with eachother

⚡️ - there's nobody I'd rather spend a good time with than zem. ze always knows how to make me laugh or just feel better no matter what's going on. i think discovering how good they are with kids was another great thing about them. he's always good at bringing people's moods up and going with the flow for the most part which I wish I was even slightly good at doing. They're a real dork but my dork and my goofball so it's wonderful. we've also shared some pretty deep and personal things and ze knows when to get serious but they're just wonderful.

🐈 - he really is my husband and we are forever meant to be together. we don't completely understand one another and are a bit different but that's alright. he's always been patient with me and done his best to see where I'm coming from in how I am with things. He doesn't like opening up but I do my best to be patient and listen when he's ready. I love my special moments of making him genuinely laugh or smile about even the smallest things. He's a treasure to me and means the absolute world to me.

🎥 - she is the absolute cutest on the entire planet and I want to eat her up. i didn't think I'd develop feelings for him but I'm really glad I did and I'm glad we're together even if it's only been a little while. hes told me he feels like we're soulmates a few times now and i think it's genuinely so cute. she has a weird sense of humor and can be a little freak but that's what makes her so very endearing to me. i just want her around constantly and she's so comfortable to snuggle with she's wonderful.

[dewipersikkk]

Daily Rivamika Fanfics Recommendations : Day 2

Theme : Modern AU (PART 1)

Collide by eplrluieett

Rating : M

Summary : A series of one-shots, stand alones, and drabbles dedicated to Levi and Mikasa. 

Review : Collection of "chef kiss" one-shots of Rivamika. The one-shots are heartwarming (some angsty) and I love to read it! The first one-shot has an Ackerbaby and it's emotional and super cute.

The other agent Ackerman by @alienheartattack

Rating : M (SMUT)

Summary : Mikasa, an up-and-coming agent at the Bureau of Intelligence, has an enormous crush on the top spy at her agency. When she's paired with him on her latest mission, she finds out a lot more about the other Agent Ackerman than she bargained for.

An accidental encounter by seekingtomorrow

Rating : General

Summary : Mikasa has to steal Levi's cravat for a sorority initiation, but she gets caught.

Review : Some of of my Rivamika reading lists in the past :). College AU! I love the author's works.

Roomates by seekingtomorrow

Rating : Teen

Summary : Sometimes Armin loves his roommates, loves living with Mikasa and Eren. And sometimes, Armin wishes he could live with anyone but a sex-starved fitness buff and a pyromaniac.

Review : FUNNIEST FANFIC THAT I EVER READ! Some Aruannie crumbs too!

The Million Dollar Man by volti

Rating : M

Summary : “You never thought love was selfish before.”

“I never thought we had a way out.”

Mikasa’s mother arranges for her to marry millionaire Levi to settle a debt/financial problems. Mikasa hates the idea and has no feelings for Levi, who is in love with her, but goes through with it for the sake of saving her family. 

Review : OMG I CAN'T GET BORED READING THIS FIC FOR THOUSAND TIMES! HEART-BREAKING, TEAR-JERKING AND I'M SO EMOTIONAL READING THIS AAAA!!! At least, Mikasa learns to love Levi right?

Textbook notes by KawaiiCaptain

Rating : General

Summary : Levi and Mikasa are in the same class, unfortunately they have to share a textbook, though some things start to change as time progresses.

The taste of pomegranate by @alienheartattack

Rating : Teen

Summary : Mikasa Ackerman has just landed her first big role, dancing a pas de deux in a showcase for Erwin Smith’s dance company, but the partner he’s chosen for her is driving her insane. Ballet AU!

Mint Tea and Post-its by monidon

Rating : General

Summary : Mikasa isn’t sure when the first note appeared on her desk, but it was clearly from someone who knew her- or at least knew she preferred her tea hot and plain. Deaf!Mikasa

Review : I love Monidon's fanfics so much and I remember monidon always post up her crochets Rivamika featuring Baby Izumi and Erwin.

Pure dawn by sulkyfuckingcat

Rating : Explicit (SMUT)

Summary : It's a late evening on Christmas eve. Mikasa thought it would be like any other night: close the coffee-shop, watch TV and go to bed. What happens when a regular customer decides to stay a bit longer...

Can I Get Your Name, Please? by robin_jonahs

Rating : Teen

Summary : Levi works at a busy coffee shop with Hanji, along with others. Hanji is in a great mood, and Levi is not. Hanji knows Levi's got a thing for that customer, and Levi doesn't want to admit it.

Astringent on the Tongue by @alienheartattack

Rating : M

Summary : Levi's favorite customer at his tea shop has been away for a few weeks, and he misses her terribly.

Spicy : Jalapeno by Hallow17

Rating : M

Summary : Mikasa has worked something up just for Levi- in the form of some sexy lingerie. This leads to something sexy for the both of them!

Cultivating Happiness by thedrunkenwerewolf

Rating : Teen

Summary : Mikasa asks Levi for help fixing her garden, which leads to something more.

White noise and blue shadows by @valya-azucena

Rating : Teen

Summary : Levi is a 31-year-old office worker by day, and a video game addict by night. He doesn't have many friends, but while playing he meets Mikasa, a mysterious girl who threatens to surpass his gaming statistics.

The Sound of Lightning by @lychee-green-tea

Rating : M

Note : Incomplete

Summary : Levi has always known that someday, a day like this might come. A day that will shatter the peace that he has come to know. Peace is a fickle thing, after all, and never lasts. But it is the culmination of a hard earned life, of finding that one human who he chose to spend the rest of his days with, of bringing some actual light into the world instead of away from it, that leads him to this thought: whoever is dumb enough to come after humanity’s strongest pair, bring it the fuck on.

Or, the one where Levi and Mikasa are badass protective parents.

...........

END OF PART 1

[amazingphanisnotonfire-imagines]

Archie//sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart

Request: Hey agian lol sorry I was also wondering if you could do 2 archie andrew imagines where the reader gets pregnant and tells archie in a cute way, skip to where they find out the gender, then the birth and Archie makes a promise to reader and their baby and proposes to the reader also archie does skin to skin contact 

hey! so, this was fun to write! i hope you like! there’s a lot of baby themed things being posted right now, i must have had an influx of baby requests. also, title is a winnie the pooh quote, so credit to that adorable yellow bear i guess. he really has way with words doesn’t he? 

Andrew’s construction is in popular demand these days, the legacy of Fred Andrews has travelled far and wide through the surrounding towns of Riverdale, and Archie feels like he hasn’t stopped in the last month. He goes to work before you wake up, comes home when it’s dark, eats, showers and sleeps. 

Today is no different, and as he drags his feet up the steps to your apartment, keys jingling in his hands as he goes over what he has left to do on the build he’s currently doing, his eyes get heavier with each step. 

He expects you to be waiting by the door, or pottering about in the kitchen when he walks through the front door, but there’s no one there. The lights are switched off, causing a frown to form on his face. 

The first thing he feels is panic, but then he hears you coming out of the bathroom, a bright smile on your face as you near him and he feels himself relax. 

“Hey babe.” You greet and wrap your arms around his neck. He kisses you slowly and you feel a blush creep up your cheeks. “How has your day been?” You ask and grab his coat from him. 

“It was alright. We’re almost finished the house, hopefully it’ll be done in the next few days, so maybe next weekend we can get away somewhere.” He replies making you grin. “Right now though, I need a shower.” He sighs and untangles himself from you, cringing when he realizes just how bad he needs one.

“Wait!” You grab his hand and he looks at you confused. “I need to give you something first.” You add and pull him into the small dining room. Candles line the room, making him furrow his eyebrows as he looks at you. “Okay, close your eyes.” You tell him and he sends you a look before reluctantly closing his eyes. 

You take a deep breath, feeling your heartbeat in your throat as you pick up the small box hidden on one of the chairs. 

“Hold your hands out.” You instruct and he does, slightly apprehensive of what you’re going to do. 

“If this is a spider I swear to God, Y/n.” He teases making you giggle. 

“It’s not I promise. Just give me your hands.” You say and he shifts uncomfortably, but holds his hands out anyway. “Okay.” You place the box in his hands and he squeezes it. “Open them!” 

His eyes snap open and he looks down at the small white box. He looks between it and you before pulling the lid off. A small bear stares back at him and for a moment he’s confused as to why you’ve given him his childhood Winnie the Pooh bear to him as a present. But then he notices what he’s holding and his eyes widen. 

“Holy shit.” He whispers and picks the white stick up. “Are you?” He squints while reading the small screen. “positive...are you pregnant?” Tears blur his vision but he can just make out you nodding and he grins at you. 

“Don’t worry, I cleaned the test before I put it in the bo-” A squeal leaves your lips as he picks you up and spins you around. Tears roll down his cheeks while he laughs loudly. 

“I love you so fucking much.” He mumbles against your lips. You run your fingers through his hair, and his eyes flutter closed. 

“I love you too.” You reply and pull him in for another kiss. 

---

“Go ahead.” The bell above the door rings, alerting the few people sitting in Pop’s of your arrival. Archie presses a kiss to your head and squeezes your hand before ordering. 

You take a quick glance around, trying to find an empty booth for the two of you to sit and celebrate in, but when your eyes land on a certain blonde and beanie clad couple, your eyes light up and all thoughts of private moment are gone. 

“What are you guys doing back?” You ask, pleasantly surprised and Betty and Jughead stop their conversation. Your smiles mirror each other as they stand up to hug you, and you feel tears spring to your eyes. “Sorry guys.” You wipe at them and Betty looks at you concerned. “It’s the hormones. Although, I am really happy that you’re back.” You send them a watery smile and they look at you sympathetically. 

“Here.” Jughead hands you a napkin and you take it gratefully. 

“Thanks.” You slide into the seat opposite them, resting a gentle hand on the top of your bump. 

“We’re just visiting our parents.” Betty explains. “My mom’s been on the phone every single day for the past two weeks so I thought I’d come down for the weekend so she’ll leave us alone for a bit.” She explains and you roll your eyes. 

“I see she still isn’t quite over the two of you moving.” 

“You’re telling me.” She sips her milkshake while huffing. 

“It’s not like we moved half way across the country. We’re an hour and a half drive.” Jughead adds through a mouthful of food and you pull a face. 

“Jughead, Betty!” Archie grins while placing your drinks down on the table. “What are you doing back.” 

“Alice.” The three of you reply and he shakes his head, a small laugh escaping his lips. 

“Oh.” 

“Yeah.” Betty nods. “Anyway, how are you guys? What have you been up to?” She asks and you and Archie share a look. He places a hand on your bump and you give it a squeeze. 

“We went to the doctors today for a scan.” Archie starts and a soft smile twitches at your lips. 

“Oh you’re twenty weeks now!” Betty squeals making Jughead jump slightly as she leans forward. “Do you know what you’re having?” 

“Nope.” You shake your head and she slumps in her seat. “The doctor wrote it down but we haven’t looked at it yet.” You add and she picks her head up, her eyebrow raises as she glances between you and the bag sat beside you. 

“Nope!” Archie picks it up before she has the chance to grab it and she sits back down with a loud huff.

“Meanie. I think as the auntie and uncle of your baby, we have a right to know what it is.” She crosses her arms and you roll your eyes at her. 

You may have all grown up, moved away and gotten actual lives. But whenever your back together in Riverdale, you all revert back to teenagers winding each other and everyone else up. 

“Hey babe?” Archie interrupts yours and Betty’s small argument and you send her a glare before facing your boyfriend. “Where’s the envelope?” 

“What?!” Your eyes widen and you grab the bag from him. Jughead and Betty lean over the table and watch you empty your bag. “No, no, no.” You mumble and shake the worn leather. 

“It’s fine.” Archie tries to calm you down. “Isn’t it fine guys.” 

“Yes.” Jughead nods. 

“Totally fine.” Betty adds and searches through the pile of things on the table. “It’s got to be here somewhere.” 

“Hey, do any of you guys know why somebody would just have the world ‘girl’ in an envelope?” Reggie drags a chair up to your table and everyone goes silent. “Because, even I know that’s weird.” He continues and drops the paper on the table.

Black curly writing faces the four of you and you all stare down in shock, it takes a few minutes before Archie breaks the silence. A shocked laugh escapes his lips and he looks at you, tears forming in his eyes. 

“We’re having a girl?” He says and you nod. 

“Yeah.” You laugh. “I suppose we are.” He cuts you off with a kiss and Betty and Jughead share a look, clinking their glasses together. 

---

“Y/n. I have loved you since we were 16. I love how smart you are, and how you’re always the funniest person in the room. Your smile is just my favourite thing to look at, it makes me smile just thinking about it. You’ve made me a better man, and now a father, so I would like to make you my wife. Y/n Y/l/n, will you marry m-OW!”

“Are you seriously asking me to marry you while I’m giving birth?” You seethe and squeeze his hand. 

“I thought it was romantic.” He argues and pulls his fingers from your grip. He’s about to continue when you send him a glare that quickly shuts him up, maybe even forever. 

“Birth is not romantic. It is the furthest thing from romantic and when I’ve finished this I swear I’m going to tear your head from your shoulders, shove it in the hole and then see how you like pushing something of that size out of you.” His eyes widen at your threat and he gulps a little. 

The midwives and doctor surrounding you stifle their laughs at your words, all of them excited to tell their co-workers the newest insult to go on their wall of insults that’s been hurled at partners. 

“Sorry.” He mumbles and rubs the back of his neck awkwardly. “You’re doing amazing babe.” He strokes the top of your head and you groan loudly as another contraction hits. 

“That’s it Y/n, keep pushing. Well done.” The midwife talks you through it and you grit your teeth as you push again. 

“Why do you have your boobs out?” You ask through you’re panting and Archie looks down at his bare chest. 

“The midwife said it would help bonding.” He shrugs and you stare at him. 

“With who? The midwife?” 

“No.” He shakes his head. “The baby.” You’re about to argue when another contraction cuts you off and Archie’s bonding is the least of your problems. 

“Fuck!” You curse and Archie grimaces at the noises you’re making. If he could swap places with you, he would in an instant. He hates seeing you in pain, even if you just get a paper cut, so this is killing him, even if he does know after it’ll be worth it. 

With a few more pushes and lot more curses, you finally give birth to a 7lb baby, born at 8:17am with bright brown eyes and head full of blonde hair. 

“Do you think she’ll turn ginger?” You ask through sobs as she’s carefully handed to you. 

“I hope so.” Archie cries. “Although, I don’t really care. I’ll love her no matter what.” He adds and wipes the tears from his eyes. 

“Archie?” You ask and he looks at you, both of your eyes full of love and awe. “I will marry you.” You say, a tired smile twitching at your lips while your head falls onto his shoulder, pressing a soft kiss to it. “Would you like to hold her?” You ask and he nods eagerly. 

“I’m always going to be here for you and you’re mom...I promise.” He starts, and walks over to the window looking over the car park and the rest of Riverdale. “You are the most loved thing in this world and I am already so proud of you. I love you.” Archie whispers, the chatter from the nursers and the curses from you all fade away as he stares down at her. Her wide eyes look back at him, they pierce through him and stare straight at his soul. “Hi, Winifred, welcome to the world.” 

✨tagged ✨

 @moxleybabe

[roses-ruby]

sinner;

Jungkook x Female Reader

Genre: Cop AU, An onslaught of Angst, Thriller, Mature

Warnings: Obsessive/Possessive behavior, Toxic relationships, Yandere, Stalking, Emotional and Physical abuse, MiSoGYny, Violence, Bad parents, Bad cops, Kidnapping

Word Count: 11,000

Summary: No matter where you run, the past will find you.

The dark clouds approached along the light blue fabric of the sky.

You watched them from your car window, dreading the downpour you’d have to drive home through tonight. With a sigh, you open the door and step out of your 2012 Hyundai Accent, planting your soles firmly onto the cemented parking lot. Your rustic car shakes with the loss of weight and the door creaks at the hinges once you slam it shut.

Somehow the old you had managed to entertain yourself with the thought that receiving a promotion would ultimately be able to afford you a better car, but no – you were stuck with the same failing engine, same worn out tires, same chipped paint aside the right headlight and occasional oil leaks.

Old you was a fool, you think, placing your hands in your coat pocket and walking towards the station in a swift, rigid pace. The air was chilly, and the strong breeze hit your face in unpleasant streaks. You kept your head down, arms clinging to the sides of your body to warm you up. There were barely any people outside the station, just a couple of men in blue quickly ensuring victims or witnesses. Years on the force had given you the eye to spot the differences between your average citizen and a perp with ease.

Perps always had an emptiness in their gaze. A vacant spot that erased their crime from their own mind. Defense mechanism they call it. You weren’t a stranger to that emotion yourself.

With no time to waste, you rush up the steps. As you pull the door of the station open, your ears are immediately filled with chatter, paper clatter and ringing phones. More importantly your body is filled with warmth. Like it was memorized in your head, you sift through the desks and file cabinets with ease, trudging past several rushing bodies on your way to a hallway down the right. Reaching the end of the corridor, you see the four men you were expecting through the clear glass window in front of their room. They were laughing at something one of them had said, a laughter that came to a full stop the moment you burst into the chief’s office.

All eyes were on you.

“There you are, detective! Right on time.” The chief, a charismatically aged character, calls out your last name as he leans back in his creaky leather chair.

“Not like she has anything better to do…” Hyun, the Sergeant’s younger partner, remarks underneath his breath.

“It’s my day off chief…this better be good.”

“Why? Did you have a date?” You catch Hyun’s sarcastic eyes before he bursts into a fit of laughter at your unamused face.

“Like you ever get laid.” Jimin scoffs at him with a raised eyebrow from the opposite side of the room.

“Motherfucker I got laid last night!” Hyun shouts like that was the funniest thing he’s said while Jimin holds back his growing smile.

“Yeah? Your asshole still hurt?” Sarge slams Hyun in the back as they all break out into mutual cackles. Hyun fights back by pushing his older partner into a cabinet while making derogatory remarks.

You try not to scowl at the suffocating testosterone in the air as you watch the boys play around.

“All right, all right, quiet down.”  The chief shouts, rubbing his forehead wrinkles with his fingers and looking back at you like he suddenly remembered you exist. “___- uh…we got a little situation for you.”

He reaches to the left of his desk and picks up a file before throwing it up ahead on the table. There was a sudden coating of thick silence around the room as your eyes roam from the detectives scrutinizing you, back to the thick manilla folder thrown out in front of you. You carefully walk up to where the file laid, picking it up and examining the name on the small name card clipped at the top left.

“Jeon Jungkook?”

You question in surprise. Your orbs fly from the chief’s empty face to the white name card.

“How much do you know about Jeon?” The chief asks slowly. You recognize that tone of voice. That tone you’ve witnessed multiple times in interrogation with a suspect. The aura in the room felt strange.

You drop the file to your side so you can look the chief right in the eyes.

“What do you mean? I know that he’s the most accomplished assassin-for-hire to this date. I know that he has his dirty hands everywhere across the East. I know that he’s responsible for Asia’s most influential triad trade. I know that he’s taken down too many of our own and I know he should be jammed into a cage for the rest of his life, chief.”

The chief exhaled, some tension leaving his facial features as he leans further back in his chair and shuts his eyes. You studied the man in pity. Was this how you were bound to end up in a few years? Bald, stressed, only black coffee in your system, suspicious of everyone and everything with a failing marriage and kids who won’t speak to you?

Half of that was actually how you lived like right now.

“I’m sorry, ___. You know how many rumors there are of officers under Jeon’s thumb. Patrollers, lieutenants, even agents…they are all chummy with that bastard. I can’t help but be careful.”

“What do you mean? What does this have to do with me, chief?” You furrowed your eyebrows, still not understanding what was happening or why you were called in on your day off for an ‘urgent’ matter.

“We caught him.” Sarge interjects, “Tip came in this morning about a deal in the abandoned mill off the northwest. He surrendered as soon as we showed up, no casualties.”

You couldn’t stop your mouth from dropping. Did you hear that correctly? Jeon Jungkook, who had been on the world’s most wanted list for 6 years now just happened to be caught in your city, at the abandoned mill in the middle of the day? It was hard to believe but Sarge didn’t seem like he was joking.

“T-that’s great…w- is he in custody right now? Here?”

“He is. But we have a problem though…” You look back at the chief who was staring right at you. “He won’t talk.”

“I mean we expected that, right? He did the same thing in Hong Kong. Wha- is...is he pleading the fifth or-”

“That’s the thing, he surrendered but didn’t make any attempts to cooperate, he’s just been sitting stationary on his ass for 3 hours. The deputy had to phone it in as soon as he got here, so Kane’s bound to show up at any minute. They’ll take him away to some fucking facility and we’ll just have to stick out our tongues and wag our tails while the big boys do the real work. Damn! We couldn’t find jack shit when raiding the fucking mill!” The chief rambled, still massaging his forehead like he had a headache. “And that deadly weapon expert? All he had on him was an old handkerchief.”

He snorted but there was no amusement in his voice. But suddenly his vigor died down and his eyes stared off into the distance.

“…There’s only one thing he said the entire time he’s been in that interrogation room.”

“…What did he say?” You ask carefully, noticing the way everyone present was glaring holes into you.

“He said he’ll only speak to you.” The chief leans towards you, placing his elbows on his desk with his eyes slightly squinting and an unspoken question on his lips.

Suddenly the room turns cold and you feel like you were outside in that freezing chill once again. Your mind runs a mile a minute and your skin breaks out into goosebumps. It all makes sense just then. The threatening atmosphere, the stare downs, the discerning. They all had one question staining their mind. Why would the world’s most powerful hitman and black arms dealer want to talk to some random low-grade rookie detective?  

Hell, you didn’t know yourself.

“Me? Why would he want to speak to me?”

“He said he knows you.”

You couldn’t stop yourself from scoffing. That was ridiculous. If you met someone like Jeon Jungkook before, you would remember it…wouldn’t you?

“Chief, I’m telling you, I don’t know what he’s talking about.”

“Then how could he know your full name?” Hyun interrupts

You glare at him from your position in the middle of the room. “How am I supposed to know dumbass?”

He smirks, his disgusting gaze sharpening. “Maybe he just knows how to sniff out the cunts.”

“Watch your fucking mouth Hyun.” Jimin steps between you both in a flash. He was facing away from you, but you could tell he was pissed by how he clenched his fists. Hyun scoffs, the corner of his lips picking up.

“I sniff two.”

It all happens in the blink of an eye. Jimin tries to leap at him but you barely manage to hold your partner back by the shoulder. Smart mouth also gets up from where he was leaning before Sarge rushes up to the younger. They both glare at each other like they were ready to kill while you grimace looking at each of their loaded holsters. The fact that these men were allowed to open carry was the most terrifying part.

“Enough!” The chief shouts, standing from his desk, “Hyun learn how to shut your yap hole for once, and Park, I need you to back off. There’s already a lot of tension in this room cause of Jeon…let’s handle that motherfucker first, officers.”

He warns Jimin to which you hold him tighter, whispering at him to let it go. Eventually the blonde simmers down – they both do, and you watch the way the chief exhales defeatedly.

“___, is there any reason at all- anything you can think of- and really think now, all the way back to before you transferred here- as to why Jeon Jungkook would want to speak to you? Why he would say he knows you?”

“None, chief.” You state calmly. There was nothing to think about, you didn’t know him.

The man stares at you for a moment before nodding. “Alright then, officer. I’ll need you in that interrogation room immediately. Maybe you can find an answer to this whole mess of a situation.”

“What the hell chief?” Hyun immediately complains, “I brought him in! I should be the one questioning him! You can’t just do that to me-” He growls, stepping up to the boss’ desk.

“Shut it!” Sergeant smacks the back of his big head while you breathe through your nose to keep calm.

Hyun always made his dislike for you obvious. It was difficult to pinpoint the exact reason he hated you because there were one too many. You were a stickler for rules and tradition, a woman (more specifically a woman who has made more arrests than him), and not the type to try and fit in. He hated how you didn’t fall in line and mostly kept to yourself – private and introverted. Whatever, you didn’t give a fuck about what he thought of you. Although you were used to Hyun’s moronic nature, it was still rarely this chaotic and tense in your station. Everyone seemed to be at one another’s neck. The most thrill you all had was capturing a local drug dealer a few years back.

But then again, Jeon Jungkook was far from your average criminal.

“You were in there for 2 and a half fucking hours with the captain himself, Hyun. What did you get out of it?” Chief groans

“I-I just need a little more time, just a li-”

“Time we don’t have!” The older man yells at the top of his lungs. “I know you’re the one who cuffed him and I’m real happy for that 20 second thrill you got but you can’t just get your panties in a twist when things don’t go your way. ___ here is just as capable of an officer as you. If she can get him to talk and we can gain some info on him and his little gang before those FBI pigs show up – just think of what that could mean for the team…”

Hyun scowled at the elder for a minute before contemplating on what was just said. Pursing his lips, he took a step back with a face that screamed defeat. “Yes, chief.” He mumbles.

“Good. Now ___,” The attention was once again placed on you. “We don’t have much time. Get out there and find out what that son of a bitch is thinking.”

“Yes, chief.”

“But listen, this man knows your name meaning it’s safe to say he knows your identity. He’s smart and he’s dangerous. Don’t get caught in any of his traps. We’ll be listening from the other side of the wall so if you feel like something’s off, signal us at any time, alright?”

His order had all the men in the room frowning for different reasons. Jimin had on his usual concerned face and even Sarge seemed worried. The thought of any stranger knowing your identity terrified you. But these were the last people on earth you would tell that to. You paid their disturbed expressions no mind as you nodded in determination, pulling your posture straight and holding your head up high.  

“Yes, chief.”

_

You clench the file towards your chest.

There was an unsettling feeling you felt standing outside the door of interrogation room 4. Same one you had felt the first time you became a detective and were ordered to interrogate some big burly guy who had slashed his ex-girlfriend’s tires. Even though you thought you had left your past behind, here it was, surrounding you in an uncomfortable heat. This wasn’t just some petty thief who robbed a local convenience store or some middle-aged man who tried to choke his wife to death.

No. This was much, much bigger than that.

Jeon Jungkook, also known as JJK was a notorious hitman with several successful operations carried out around the world. In Washington, Libya, Hong Kong, Brazil and even Rome. He made the most wanted list when he was only 19 and was infamous for getting the job done. None of the men in his list survived…ever. Not only was he a perfectionist in his handiwork but also knew how to deal with the preparation.

A master of weapons; he could operate a H&K P7 in his sleep and take down 10 operatives with a single combat knife. His knowledge of artillery made him a big deal amongst the triads so setting up a little side business as a black arms dealer was a walk in the park for him. He was strong, fast, smart and feared. Not even the finest could catch him and at times months would go on by without a sighting.

Yet suddenly…he was just behind this door.

And who did he desperately want to see?

You.

By name.

Of all people.

Now you consider yourself a logical person. Someone guided by intellect before anything else. You did the math, worked on the equation, pondered on the systematics but nothing clicked. Nothing. There was absolutely no reason for someone like him to want to meet you but then again, the whole situation was the strangest fucking thing you’ve seen.

Surrendering at an abandoned mill in your jurisdiction would be the last place you’d think Jeon Jungkook would be captured. In your mind, his destiny was meant to end on a grander scale at the edge of the world. Some Hollywood theatrical-like bullshit where they would have him cornered on some rooftop with multiple choppers and snipers ready to take him down. This however – the threatening but anticlimactic atmosphere… it didn’t make any sense. Not for someone as careful and calculated as Jungkook.

For some reason, it just felt like he was waiting on something…something big to happen. A sensation of doom coursed throughout your body. Everything about today felt wrong. Like you and your colleagues were caught right in his talons.

By far, the most bizarre part about the situation was how he knew your name and you. You’ve always kept such a lowkey profile, it just didn’t make any sense.

“___?” The sound of your name startles you and you whip towards your side to see your partner dressed in his usual face of worry. “You alright?”

“…I’m good.” You choke out, trying to sound as lucid as possible.

It doesn’t seem to convince him however as he tilts his head and frowns at you.

“Listen, if you don’t want to talk to him, you don’t have to. Chief shouldn’t have pushed you into this bullshit – why do we even have to listen to what a criminal wants anyway? I-”

“Jimin, calm down. I’m fine.”

“Bu-”

“Your mollycoddling doesn’t help as much as you think it does, Park.”

Your words seem to have surprised him, his stubborn expression morphing into denial.

“That’s…I didn’t mean…”

You shut your tired eyes, feeling bad about the way you spoke to your only friend at the station. This is exactly why everyone thought you were way too rigid and unapproachable. Jimin however was too much of a nice guy, always going out of his way to make friendly with you. It always made you wonder – why would a well-liked, popular and talented guy such as Jimin want to hang around you or even ask the chief to be your partner? Maybe it was pity he felt for you.

That feeling was not something you desired. It left a nauseous impression down your throat. All you wanted was to do your job the best you could, go home, take your pills and sleep your days away. You didn’t want anyone’s kindness or company, you just wanted it to be over. Park Jimin’s sincerity was a hindrance.

“I’m sorry it’s just…I’m real tired of getting treated like this. I get it, I’m a woman and somehow that means I’m a less than, a cause for concern or just a fucking HR liability. I fucking get it without every single one of you reminding me every damn day.”

“You know that’s not what I meant, ___.” Jimin stares at you apologetically

“Then please, Jimin. Let me do my job.” You hold his stare until he eventually sighs, giving you a nod and retreating.

Once he walks away, you let out a shaky exhale, reaching towards the door handle with trembling fingers. Get it together, you whisper to yourself. After all the tough talk, the truth was you weren’t ready. You were scared shitless. Maybe Hyun was right about you.

Maybe your father was.

Drowning out every negative thought, you turn the door handle and push the door open.

_

You were immediately greeted by the usual silent man on the interrogation chair. His dark orbs were soundlessly watching the wall ahead of him. When you step into the room, he turns his head to look at you. Once he notices you, he instantly breaks out into a smirk. Clenching your file harder, you physically stop yourself from shivering.

You had seen him before, in blurry internet sightings and news coverages. But never up close and personal…and never smiling. It was like you entered a whole different world; the room you were pretty familiar with felt like a surreal fantasy. He was drop dead gorgeous. Lethal, you could say. His face was round, and features were sharp. A prominent nose, pink lips, sharp jaw and intense, smoldering eyes. Midnight black hair shyly covered his temple as he sat upright and confident in his chair.

He was dressed rather casually – a dark blue denim jacket that molded around his muscles and black top that covered his long neck. Tight fitted black pants that were ripped at the knees, displaying his thick, strong thighs and the heaviest leather boots you’ve ever seen. His hands were cuffed to the table so everyone can see them at all times. All he did was sit still but somehow commanded your whole attention. You gulped involuntarily at the sight before you.

You’ve never seen a man more comfortable in his own skin.

When he notices you ogling, he raises a brow in amusement. It alarms you, your eyes shooting to the large mirror on the other side of the wall. They were probably watching you…waiting for you to mess up.

Not wanting to throw them anymore bones, you clear your throat. Walking in and sitting down opposite to Jungkook. You don’t give him the time of day, pretend not to notice his bottomless orbs following your every move as you flip the file open a couple pages. As you continue to ignore him, you swear you could hear him tsk under his breath.

“So… Jeon Jungkook. Aged 23. Professional hitman. Side arms dealer. Wanted by the CIA, FSB, NSA and the Navy seals. Says here you’ve pissed off a lot of people, Jungkook.”

This was routine. The lighthearted police tone you always used. Very rarely would officers come off strongly when interrogating perps unless they were fucking morons. It was better if everyone just cooperated like this was an elementary school’s playground and none of the children got violent. Perps had to feel comfortable enough to spill it all. Being approachable, calm and levelheaded was normal for an efficient detective.

It was normal.

But it didn’t feel normal. You found yourself cringing at your voice, at the way you spoke. Your words felt so out of place and awkward. For some reason, you were hyper aware of everything you were doing. Maybe it was because you were under Jungkook’s extremely scrutinizing gaze or maybe because you knew Hyun was probably sounding out some sarcastic remarks about your abilities behind that mirror. Whatever it was, you didn’t feel good. Yet you continued on like everything was fine.

“You’ve been quite the busy boy, haven’t you?” You continue on, flipping through the file and swallowing the uneasiness.

“Like you wouldn’t believe, doll.”

His pet name for you stops you in your tracks. In the middle of turning a page that hung in midair. Slowly, you look up at him from beneath your lashes and he has on that same damn smirk. Stress-free posture and concentrated gaze. Looks like he was comfortable.

“…Really? Mind telling me about it?”

He continues to stare at you for a moment before letting out a humorous sigh. Jungkook leans forward, resting his elbows on the table and rolling his tongue in his cheek.

“What would you like to know?”

“Whatever you have for me.” You reply back, leaning in and using in the same low tone he used. Mirroring the suspect, playing the game. No matter how shaken you were, you knew how to do your job.

Another smirk appears on his face before he props back on his chair.

“Mhmm, I don’t know how much I can tell you doll. We all have secrets you see, we all got someone to fool. Like you right now.”

As his words settle in, you become confused. And by the way he chuckles, you know he can see it.

“That face you have on, that cute look of determination. Flipping through those pages like you’re learning something new about me. Something that I myself might not know. Like you didn’t already memorize it front to back, way before you came in here...those eyes that are desperately trying to win us over…like you have so much to prove still.”

You were thrown off. The way he unflinchingly delivered his speech in the most persuasive way. There was a certain way you had expected this to go in your mind, a certain power your brain gave you over him but now you realize all your thoughts were dust. In reality, you couldn’t comprehend what the fuck he was going on about which gave him the upper hand.

Thus, you looked into his eyes for an answer. Genuine eyes that shone as clear as day. It made you realize that he had nothing to hide. There was nothing he was trying to erase.

It left you speechless.

Your face must have been very obvious because next thing you knew, he was answering the question that lingered your thoughts.

“Your uncertainty gives you away. I guess it’d be present in anyone who’s constantly been made to feel inferior. All your life, you’ve had to go above and beyond to be considered half as good as your colleagues with dicks. No matter how much pain and humiliation you’ve endured, everyone expects more from you. It would drive anyone mad.” He moves in further, practically whispering at this point. “It could make anyone commit sinful acts.”

“…sinful?”

“My mother used to tell me about them,” He relaxes back in his chair, “…before she left that is. She was big on religion so she’d tell me all about these people who did bad deeds- sinner, she would call them. She’d go on and on about how they look and how they act. How they don’t have a place in this world amongst the good, non-sinners. We’d know exactly how to identify them, wouldn’t we doll?”

In the bright center of interrogation room 4, your pools were glued on the stranger that knew too much but let on too little. Jungkook was the one in cuffs, but you were the one who was starting to feel trapped.

“You don’t know me. We’re not the same.” You said out loud.

He turns silent for a moment, before grinning. “I think we’re more alike than you are aware of, detective.”

“Don’t fall for any of his traps.”

“W-” You swallow, “We’re not here to talk about me…”

You tried sounding as rational and self-assured as before, but your voice was barely above a murmur. And after you spoke, he smiled. His smile was way too innocent compared to who you knew he was.

“So, you want to know about me?” He chuckled “What do you want to know?

This was your chance, you thought, surprised at how easily he seemed to be ready to change the subject matter. You began flipping through the folder nonchalantly again, trying to get back on track.

“How about you start at the mill. Who were you meeting with so early in the day, Jungkook?”

Suddenly, his eyes darken and the look on his face becomes sinister, but that smile never falls. You couldn’t help but shift in your seat at his unexpected gaze.

“If you really want to know about everything that led up to this morning…then we’d have to look back quite a bit. Maybe back years ago…to a kid whose mother was never around and whose father beat the living shit out of him twice a day.”

He throws his head back and breaks out into a laugh at your unimpressed face. You were all ears but the last thing you wanted to do was spend an uncomfortable hour or two in here. The man creeped you out, so if he could just hurry up and get on with it, maybe you could go finish your nap and forget about today.

“Okay, okay, hah,” He sits back up straight, trying to conceal his laughter, “We don’t have to go that far back, but yeah this kid had it hard. But he was never one of those cucks. As he grew older, he couldn’t just sit there and take it. No…it wasn’t like that for him…he had to fight back, and he did fight for what he could, no matter what it took. He-”

_

“Open this fucking door you little freak!”

The door’s pounding shook the whole room. His anxiety was through the roof as he watched the weak wood quiver each time the monster banged against it. It could break at any moment now and he was afraid. He always, always acted tough. Always fought back the best he could. But the truth was that he was just a skinny teenaged brat.

He didn’t want to fight. He wasn’t built for it.

“Fuck off!” The kid tried to sound as menacing as possible, but it came out a pathetic whimper and only seemed to anger the man on the other side of the locked door even further.

It was hilarious really; the kid couldn’t help but leak tears. He hadn’t eaten in days, it was his 4th beating of the week – he felt lightheaded and his body was on fire. All he wanted in that moment as he clenched his fists over his ears inside the dark bathroom was for the door to stay strong. For anyone to help him.

But as the lock broke and the wood let out a heinous whine and he was hit with sudden light and a large shadow, he realized circumstances do not work in your favor when you stand there and do nothing. And the moment he understood that, was the moment his life was about to drastically change. More accurately, the very next week.

When you entered his life.

“So- Jeon Jungkook, age 16, failing high school student…written up 4 times, visited juvie twice. Now, tell me why you beat up that kid, Jeon?” You stood up straight, writing away mindlessly in your small notebook.

The kid did nothing but stare at you through his bruised eye and busted lip, while he sat on the edge of your desk. It wasn’t his first time dealing with the cops and something inside him always knew it wouldn’t be his last. When you didn’t hear his answer, you huffed, looking up at him from the pages between your fingers.

“Well? I don’t have all night you know. I could just lock you in.”

He smirked. It was easy to tell you were new, he noticed as soon as you walked in and were told to book him by the guy who arrested him. Your uniform had been pressed with great care, not one hair was out of place and your badge was polished and perfectly positioned. It felt like you just came out of one of those corny films about the ‘good’ cops; fighting crime for justice and truth. The kid was even younger than he was at that moment when he realized just how full of bullshit that trope was.

One glance around the room, at the other pigs in uniform and he knew you had just gotten the job. That your spirits hadn’t been crushed unlike these soulless bodies wandering the station’s premises.

That was the best quality about the kid, he had always been observant. A lot more than his peers or even the adults in his life. He could tell a great deal about you at one glance. You seemed jittery and nervous, trying to write as neatly as possible. It felt like you were trying to get someone’s attention – a high ranking older officer, who you kept observing from the corner of your eye. As the kid watched that man chortle with his equally dull colleagues, he thought there was a resemblance in you both, but that there also wasn’t.

“Then why don’t you?” The kid replied a bit too sarcastically, wanting this to be over with as quickly as possible so maybe he could get some sleep for the first time in 3 days. It would do him a lot of good actually, being away from that house for a little while. Subtly, he was pleading.

“Look kid,” You grimaced, “I know that guy you beat up, he’s a racist little shit. He probably did something to you, I’m sure or you wouldn’t carry so many self-defense wounds along your hands. There might be some way I could help you; I want to help you. But only if you tell me what really happened, alright?”

It was silent just then. He was silent.

“I want to help you.”

He was expecting you to reprimand him for his smart mouth and then lock him up. That’s what anyone who took one glance at his file did. It was filled with crap about him, shit that they peered their nose over because they were so much better than him. The kid never trusted adults; they never did anything for him. He was the child that everyone discriminated against to remind themselves how lucky they were. At least my child’s not like that, is what they all thought. No one cared about his side of the story. No one but…you.

Your answer was something that caught him off guard for the first time in years.

“Why do you want to help me? I’m a criminal.”

“Oh yeah, you got a record,” You reply casually, flipping through your notes, “I glanced over it, it’s all for stealing food.”

Suddenly you became quiet. Taking a step back, you begin to study him up and down from where he sat.

“Is… is your dad not feeding you?”

Your gaze shifted further into concern and he held his breath. He’s never seen those eyes before on anyone – never for him. Shit, his own mother never looked at him like that. Like she felt something for him. Not even when the bitch ran off with the neighbor and left him with that monster – young, weak and helpless.

Having someone worry about him made him feel strange, his whole body broke out into a quiver and his eyes watered. That kid could see himself in the reflection of your eyes that had widened dramatically at the change in his demeanor. And he tried to stop himself but for some reason, he wanted you to worry about him.

“Uh- I..wai- don’t cry-'' Flustered, you scrambled around, trying to find a tissue. You were new at the job and you weren’t used to people breaking apart yet. Everyone around you seemed so busy, hustling around the station like they didn’t see a teenage boy in the start of a mental breakdown…that or they didn’t care. Finally, you grab the handkerchief your mom had stuffed inside your uniform pocket and carefully hold it out for him.

But you drop it in a flash when you witness him get struck across the face the very next instant.

“YOU FUCKING TROUBLESOME BRAT!”

You flinched at the loud, unforgiving voice that resounded throughout the station. Everyone instantly went noiseless and it felt like the station just halted for the first time in years. All you could hear were the lingering ringing of phones.

“How many times have I warned you not to make trouble? You’re a disgrace!” The man spit into the kid’s face. He was tall, maybe 6’2, and muscular compared to the teenager but stood unevenly, favoring his left foot and walked with a limp. His face bore a scar on the cheek that was partially covered with a jungle of facial hair. His eyes seemed insane with anger and he reeked of hard liquor. You had to remind yourself that you had a taser in your holster.

Slowly, you looked back at the kid whose fringe covered his eyes. He hadn’t moved an inch since the man slapped his face. A large red handprint on his already wounded skin. It pulled at your heartstrings.

“S-sir?” You cleared your throat to which the crazy man turned his sneer towards you. But you couldn’t let that faze you. “You can’t just hit a child like that, I need you to back away.”

That was the best you could do at sounding confident, but your strength wavered as soon as the man took a step towards you.

“You trying to tell me how to raise my son, girlie?”

The scent of alcohol clouded your senses. You opened and closed your mouth like a fish. Your body started trembling, but you still tried to stand your ground until-

“Jeon!”

Another loud voice interrupts you. This time though, you recognized that voice. Your dad steps between you and the snarling man and you almost cry out of relief. You gape at both of the men in awe, staring one another down. The tension wraps around your throat and you worry for the kid behind all of this. If a brawl breaks out, he’s likely to get injured…

For a second you tried peeking back at your desk over your dad’s shoulder, until you hear sudden robust laughter in front of you.

What the fuck?

“You son of a bitch, how’ve you been?” Your father daps his hand with the terrifying man and your face morphs into confusion.

The demeanor and the whole damn atmosphere between the men changed, just like that. All the suffocating animosity had vanished in an instant as if it never existed, which left you dumbstruck and standstill.

“I’ve been good you dick. You’re a lieutenant now, I see. No wonder I haven’t seen you around the parlor much.” The guy cackles loudly, making you cringe at his rotten teeth and bad breath.

“Ahh~ You know, the old ball and chain.” Your father so kindly refers to your mother, “Heh, actually I’m a sober man now! My oldest just became an officer like her father a month ago.” He moves to your side to pat you on the shoulder. You freeze under his touch and your wide pupils flicker between him and Jeon who took a newfound interest in you.

In any other instance, you would have been ecstatic to have your father compliment you. But right now, your brain had a hard time processing everything and you kept glancing at the stoic kid.

“This one yours?” The man smirks, eyeing you up and down in a disturbing way. You almost tasered him then and there. “She’s a bit noisy, isn’t she?”

Your dad laughs louder than before while you clench your fist.

“Relax, she’s just a kid – a whole rookie. She doesn’t know how all this works yet.”

You try not to grimace at his words. Here you were hoping he would have believed in you a bit more if you received a perfect score on the academy’s exam.

As his laughter dies down, your dad looks off to the side, just behind the giant man and raises his eyebrow. “And I take it this one’s yours?”

Jeon sighs, ruffling his hair with his calloused fingers. “Sadly. The kid’s a lost cause, ___. They can’t all be like your pretty little daughter. Every damn day hurting someone, busting balls, messing with the other kids…stealing. Just…you know after his mother left…”

He becomes mute suddenly. Staring at the ground in great concentration like he just got too emotional. Funny, you saw that look in another man last week. A man who lied about not murdering his wife. You tsk under your breath and look back at the kid, almost jumping out of your skin when you catch him staring right at you from where he sat. No more vulnerability in his young eyes. They were once again making the same hardened expression you saw when he first walked in here. Something felt very off.

Your attention flies back to the taller men when you feel your father shift towards the older Jeon.

“I understand.” He states sympathetically, placing a hand on his shoulder for comfort. “Take him home…”

It took you a second to snap out of your mute state.

“But dad, he-”

“Let them go, ___. This man here,” He signals at the guy, “He used to be one of the greatest and most respected officers of his time. Spent his best years serving. It’s the least he deserves. It’s alright.”

“No that’s not- Dad!” You begin flipping through your notebook, trying to show your father your notes, “Look at the kid’s fingers and arms! His face! He looks malnourished and some of those wounds look old- and- and this man’s obviously drunk and agressi-”

“___!” Your father shouts in rage, effectively shutting you up. “This is a command from your direct superior! They’re leaving.”

“But-”

At that moment he menacingly leans in, close enough to breathe in your ear.

“Don’t embarrass me further, child.” He whispers with pure venom.

And just like that, all the fight in you leaves. Your shoulders slump and head falls to the floor. There were tiny needles poking you everywhere and your face felt hot – ashamed. His words ring inside your head like a mantra and you want to just run away and hide.

All you did was disappoint him.

Your dad apologizes for you and the next thing you hear is the man grabbing the kid by the arm and you couldn’t help but physically wince at how much pain he would be in at the moment. He staggers out of earshot and you do nothing but look at the ground. How could you possibly face the kid now? After you told him you’d help him.

Because of that you don’t notice anything. You don’t notice the fact that your handkerchief was no longer on the floor. Nor do you notice the kid’s eyes which stayed on you the whole time he was being dragged out of the building.

_

You sat there, speechless.

Jungkook tilted his head, softening his gaze at your shaken form.

“He looked at you the whole time after that. Only you…but you never noticed.”

You on the other hand couldn’t hear shit he was saying. All you could think about was that vague, really fucking vague memory you had of the moment he described. Your mind was everywhere, on your father, on his father, on that event that you ended up failing to recall somehow, at your conversation with the chief earlier.

“All he had on him was an old handkerchief.”

How does someone process this? How did you forget this? There were countless of cases you’ve dealt with before, so many unusual moments that you just began throwing them out of your head for your very own sanity. That was the truth, but would anyone believe you? Jeon Jungkook was from your old hometown. Jeon Jungkook was someone you almost booked before. Jeon Jungkook was not someone who could’ve been forgotten. You, no longer in control of your facial expression, glance over at the mirror in horror. Would the chief actually think you lied?

In the back of your mind, you knew the real reason you chose to leave all the memories of your past behind – suppress them down and drown them out. But that information wasn’t something you could reveal to anyone. Ever. The one thing you were told to do was not fall into his trap, yet here you are. Your mind was a mess, which meant there was no way you could have the advantage in this situation, and you were no longer fit to interrogate him. Desperate and anxious, you place your palm on your forehead like you were in deep thought. In reality, that was the signal. You wanted to escape this place.

Jungkook glares at the side of your face, getting angrier the more you ignore him. Today was supposed to be different, his one free day where he could finally get you to notice him. And there you sat, still not looking his way. Didn’t you know you didn’t need to worry about anyone else when he was right here?

“Doll.” He practically sneers but then simmers down and smiles when you finally turn back to him – all wide eyed.

“I wanted to thank you.” He continues, “Because that day changed me forever…”

You said nothing. Wondering why the men on the other side were taking so long. He took your silence as a chance to finish his story.

“I took my beating…took all of it and said nothing. Broke my rib and wrangled my neck but I said nothing. He was drunk, so I waited for him to tire himself out…waited till he passed out on that fucking couch. Then I strangled him…with that very piece of cloth you gave me.”

This has got to be some fucking nightmare.

“And it felt really good.” His voice slightly waivered, “To watch him turn red and struggle, to watch that bastard’s life leave his eyes while in return he saw me become his demise.” He stops rambling suddenly as if recalling where he was, “Within a span of 8 minutes…I became a criminal for killing the monster who tortured me every single day. I was a sinner. I hit rock bottom. And once you’re there, it takes a lot of blood, sweat and tears to climb back up to the top.”

As you heard him rant on, your mind started to drift off. For some reason, once you slowly start to remember that tethered kid, you felt something you haven’t felt for a while. Sympathy? Sadness? Or were you just reminiscing about who you were back then. The bright young woman who had a lot to offer the world. You shake your head, looking down at the table. That girl was dead, you chose to forget her and went along with whatever life threw at you.

Your father was right to criticize your soft heart and if he were alive today you were sure he wouldn’t be able to identify you. No longer were you that naïve child who stubbornly believed that there was good in this world – in its people. It didn’t matter to you the reasons why someone committed a crime – criminals were just labeled orange jumpsuits. Jungkook had met a completely different person back then, not you.

Then why did your chest ache this much?

“J…Jungkook…I…didn’t remember…”

“I know,” He states ensuringly, making you look back up at him, “You left your past behind, after all.”

Suddenly, all the color left your face. Your heart started beating faster and you broke out into a cold sweat. You faintly thought you heard a bang behind the mirror, but you didn’t care. For the first time since you got here, your whole attention was solely on Jungkook.

It made him so happy.

“W-what…”

“It hurt when you transferred, leaving a big hole in my already impoverished life. But I understood your reasons. How can someone stay after such an incident?”

He knows.

“H-H…How did you know…”

“Oh, I know everything about you, doll.” His sinister smirk reappeared as he relaxed back into his chair and you pursed your lips as you felt an oncoming panic attack.

He knows, he knows, he knows, he-

“I know your dad wanted a son. I know that it kills you inside to never get the respect you deserve no matter what you do and even the men who claim to respect you patronize you in subtly conditioned ways. I know what your favorite food is. I know how much you love whiskey. I know you’re wearing those red panties that I fucking love on you.” He takes a breath as you let out an involuntary gasp, “And I know it was an accident.”

The first tear fell down your cheek. Shock, anger, fear? None of it mattered anymore; it was useless to pretend. You knew he knew. It was over. He stared at you in pity, like seeing you cry made him hurt.

“How could he not want someone as beautiful as you, doll?” Jungkook whispers, as if he couldn’t believe it himself.

“I wanted…to be the best for him…I tried…” Your voice strains

“I know you did. I know. Which is why you had no choice…”

In an instant, it all comes crashing back.

-

You drove down the lane a bit too clumsily, as you took the long way home.

It was almost midnight and you were speeding past 80 on a two-way lane off a cliffside road, but you didn’t give a single fuck. Your smashed mind was preoccupied at the moment.

A whole year had gone by, but your dad still hadn’t given you an ounce of trust he had for the other officers. Your dad – the fucking police lieutenant. You told him – you warned him that the man was armed, but he still charged in blind, without back up. Almost got the rest of the family members killed by doing something so crazy and careless.

Then he blamed you for not following his lead when he came out.

The tears came out faster than you could wipe them. Growing up in that home was horror. Him being on the force somehow also made him a conservative, self-righteous douchebag. Berating you for the way you’d dress, the way you ate, the way you talked to the way you styled your hair. It made you sick.

You tried so desperately to win over your own father’s love and approval from such a young age and you had nothing to show for it. Deep down, you knew it was because he wanted a boy. A boy who could become a cop like him. And a part of you thought that maybe if you became a cop anyway – one as respected and admired as he was, then he would finally admit he was wrong. At the very least he could finally tell you how proud he was of you.

You went to such lengths to spend the year being the best damn officer your town had seen. 26 arrests, 1 successful drug raid, multiple successful testimonies and extensive gang knowledge. As a plus, you had become beloved in the community. That took the most effort – you had to look the prettiest even while overworking yourself with double shifts. Be traditional and confident but not an overbearing prude. And never let the ‘unnatural’ masculine traits your job gave you, overpower your ‘natural’ feminine ones. Sounds completely simple doesn’t it? Now everyone praised you right and left. It was record breaking; you were the shit.

Yet he still wouldn’t refer to you as detective.

It broke you apart. You were at the end of your wits. Out excelling every male peer in your force. But you had zero to show for it. Which means all your efforts were for nothing.

The pain in your chest got heavier by the minute which made you whimper. Tonight, you had drunk yourself silly but not enough to take away the ache. To help yourself along, you grabbed the half-empty bottle laying in the driver’s seat in a swift motion and popped it open. Your car entered the opposite lane without your knowledge.

You chugged down the last of the bitter liquor, smashing the bottle against the driver’s side window. The anger still remained as you wiped the remnants of alcohol away from your mouth. Your vision was hazy, and you felt so pathetic – dirty, disgusting, like you were rotting from the inside. All you ever wanted to do was earn your father’s acceptance, so much so that you lost sense of any individuality you had left in you.

For a second, everything was so still and quiet, that it felt like all would be okay. The night was dark but serene.

But that tranquility vanished the instant you witnessed two bright lights closing in on you.

It all happened too quickly. You immediately swerved to your right, a loud honking and the friction of tires blasting through your ears. Years of practice and one whole one of police chases makes your instincts faster than normal and you immediately apply the clutch as your foot floors the break and you grip the handle sturdy. Your car rotates haphazardly to the right, but you were able to come to a complete halt before your front engine crashed into a tree.

Yet it feels like you did just that as your body lunges forward and the sounds of a car smashing against shrubs pierces through your ears. You were thankful you had your seat-belt on so you didn’t go flying out the windshield, but all you could think about was the immense pressure against the front of your body. The whiplash left you in shock for a couple seconds.

“Fuck.” You breathe out in agony, bringing your arm up to your sprained shoulder.

As you gather yourself together, you finally remember your surroundings and your head whips to the opposite end of the road to where you finally spot the car you almost hit. In the disoriented dark, you really had to strain into the distance. The car hadn’t been as lucky as yours as it thrashed towards the cliff side of the road. Seemed like it was laid halfway out on the edge. A non-threatening, old compact SUV – most likely a family car. Possibly children present. You could hear them screaming.

Fuck.

You had to help them as quickly as you could. But the instant you tried stepping out, you saw the gleam of a bottle under the driver’s seat.

And just like that, your body fell limp. Because you were more sober now than you’ve ever been in any moment of your life, you barely remembered…you were drunk.

All of the pain in your body immediately changed into fear – your eyes became wide and your pores leaked sweat.

You were drinking.

If you get out to help them, they were bound to smell the alcohol. If they’re able to identify you…if the police are called-

Everything would end tonight. Your career would be over, your family’s name will be dragged through the mud publicly and your father-

Your father would never forgive you. He’d never speak to you again. You’d be disowned.

Don’t embarrass me further, child.

Don’t embarrass me further, c̴h̶i̵l̴d̶

don’tembarrassmefurtherd̸o̴n̷’̸t̶e̶m̷b̷a̴r̴r̴a̴s̸s̷m̷e̶f̷u̷r̴t̸h̸e̴r̴d̵̜͓̈́͝ǫ̵͖̏͝n̴̘̈́’̷͕͐̈́t̴̗̺̃ẻ̵̢͓m̷͉̕b̸̡͕́̆a̴͔̬͆r̴̦͒r̸͉͑̿ạ̵̳̽s̵͙̏s̵̳̣̀̇m̵͉̬̐͋ë̸͓̝̕f̶̙̑u̶͈͠ř̷͔͈̃ẗ̴̠̈́h̸̖͍̅e̵̟̘͆r̷̫̕d̵̜͓̈́͝ǫ̵͖̏͝n̴̘̈́’̷͕͐̈́t̴̗̺̃ẻ̵̢͓m̷͉̕b̸̡͕́̆a̴͔̬͆r̴̦͒r̸͉͑̿ạ̵̳̽s̵͙̏s̵̳̣̀̇m̵͉̬̐͋ë̸͓̝̕f̶̙̑u̶͈͠ř̷͔͈̃ẗ̴̠̈́h̸̖͍̅e̵̟̘͆r̷̫̕d̴̼͚̠̈́̓ơ̶̪̜̅n̸̻̬͕͂͊͝’̸̼̪͉̌̒́t̷̲͓̐͒e̸̗̅͗m̵̨̹̫̓͑b̴̯̗̪̌̑å̷̬͕̻r̵̤͌̅̈́r̸̦̃̅̑ą̵̢̖̋s̷̟̜̄͆s̶̢̬̄m̸͎͗̈́́e̸̘̩̒̋f̷̝̦̟͆ũ̴͚̖̤r̶̙̫͒͝t̸̘͓̾͗͝ḩ̴̫͔̏̒ȇ̶̪̳͠d̶̳̆͂o̶͈̣͊̈́͐ņ̴̼̾’̵̨̆͂t̷̠̺͒̾̔ę̷̯̮̅̓m̸̪̑ͅb̷͇͐͑a̶̩͛̇ͅr̴̢̟̰̄͝r̸̞͙͎͑̅a̶̓̋̃ͅs̴̹͍͋̅̉s̷͓͓͎͒̆̐m̴̹̮͙̃e̶̲͗͠f̷̨͇̐́u̶̫͆̿̉r̶̰̗͑̾t̵̨̼͉͊͘h̸̻͔̥̎̒e̴̲̍̚r̷̺̘̆d̷̟̀̌̃õ̴̲̬̕n̸̡̕’̷̨̭̘̽t̶̛̼̀ë̸͉̲̂ḿ̶͚̌̚ḇ̸͇̗̿̏ȃ̶͖̥͔̿͑r̶̲̝̣͗̅r̴̖͖͘͝a̶͚͉͚͝s̴͎̘͑s̶͙̲̜̾̚m̵̨̧͒̈ẽ̵̱f̶̯̓̑̀ủ̶͍ȑ̵̻̼̍͒͜t̸̞͕͐̉̚h̵̺͐e̷̟̠̪̅͑́r̷̹̔͠d̶̯̼̫͒̑̅ȏ̴͎n̵̹̯̈͗’̷̢͋ṯ̵͓̈́ȅ̸̠ṃ̶̲̓b̸̘̻̈̆͜͝ä̷̢́̈r̴͍̫̐̌r̷̞̂͐͑à̵̛̤̌s̶̠̟̃ş̸͍̜́m̵̰͋̏̈́ë̴̬́f̵̝͈̋̄̚u̶͉͉͇͂̓r̴͚̉̎t̴̹̤͆ȟ̸͔͔̈́ė̶̹͆d̸̟̫͆̈́ő̸̲̔͠n̸̠̈́͌’̴̮̏̂̏t̷̩̦̓̿͒e̵͉̲̰̽̿m̶̡̛b̸͓̥͙͋ă̵̭̈́r̶͓̓͐r̵̤̮̾̌a̴̗͒͘s̸̫̉̆̀s̵̠̉͝m̸̪̗͛̽e̸͈͒̔f̶̺̟͂́u̷̢̧͈͐r̵͉͚̈́͝ẗ̴͚̹͉́̋́h̵͈̰̥̔d̷̟̉ͅo̶̩̟̺̍̒̾ṇ̴͋̾’̶̟̣̓̚ť̵̳̩e̵̡̼͛m̷͉̺̈́b̶̢̙̝͌a̶̳̟̐͠r̶͉̅̿ŕ̶̞̌̃a̶̠̿̊̽ͅs̸̡̨̩̽ş̶̯͎̃̀̈́m̵͙͓̦̍́e̸̠͍̳̽̆f̷͔͛̈́u��͉̻͂̆͒r̴̥̩̀̑̋ṭ̶͔̯̊̂ḣ̵̡̭̰̔͆ễ̵͎̚r̷̝͔̙̀d̴͈͕͔͊ȍ̴̅̓ͅn̷͙̈’̴̪̜͎̓̈́͠t̴̝̾̚e̵͇̭͐ḿ̵̙̊b̷̧̝͆͛̔ͅa̴̗̲͒͠r̷͉͍̹̀́r̶̨͎̤̄a̶̙͔̳̾́͐s̸̳͑s̴̨͆͆̀ṃ̸̏̕͠è̴͎̻͆̚f̷͎͇̀ͅu̶͔̺͌̏̊͜r̷̩̂͗t̸̝̓̏h̶̠͉̏͝ȩ̷̬̣̈r̵̼̍ď̵͔̊o̵̡͉̣͑͂͒n̵̜̋́’̵̠̈́ͅṭ̷͛͝͝e̸̮͆m̷͚̈̃͊b̵͚͐͊a̷͈̲̘͛͆̚ŕ̵̻̦̘̓͠ŕ̵̹̭̈̎a̷̻̺̫̍͝s̶̜̠̹͑s̴̼̈́m̵̯̏ĕ̷̲̯̣f̵̹͔̍͝ų̸̤͌̿̀r̵̨͓̳̽͝t̵͉̟̃̐h̴̘̰͖̓͛e̵̺̽͠r̸̡̟̻̒̈́

_

“NO!” You shout, covering your ears with your palm to drown out his scalding voice.

Jungkook finally stopped talking, watching you cave into yourself on the chair in front of him. He would’ve done something if his hands weren’t tied down to the table. You looked so fragile and pained, it reminded him of himself in those days. This was the very look you had on after your father whispered something to you all those years ago. As he thought, he was always right about you.

You both were the same.

“_-”

“Shut up!” You scream, clenching your eyes shut and trying to erase the image of the car from your mind. “Just shut the fuck up!”

“You had no choice, ___.” He continued, his voice softer than before, “You had to drive off.”

“No I…” You look back up at the man in front of you through hard blurry tears, trying not to choke on your words. “I didn’t mean it…I didn’t- I promise dad…I did- i-it was an accident…”

“___...I know. It was you father who broke your spirit. It was the world that crushed your soul. They drove you mad, doll. They made you a sinner.”

You say nothing as the tears continue to fall, getting lost inside his bottomless pools.

“You drove off and left the family there. But he didn’t.”

He?

“That kid you never noticed…the kid who would’ve done anything for you.”

His response further tethers you into confusion. You furrow your eyebrows, not understanding what he was trying to say.

“That kid who only looked at you. He was right behind you that night.”

You feel a shiver crawl up your spine.

_

The kid was only slightly older and less miserable that night.

He was involved with every bad name in that town, aka his late father’s acquaintances. They provided him a new shelter, transportation and a means to earn food, as long as he did their bidding. Crime was a lot more organized than he would have ever thought. It was a hard life, but he was learning to survive. Committing small acts here and there for big games. No longer was he some petty thief who stole in desperation, he was a kid with so much blood on his hands that he couldn’t even stand looking at them

There were nights where he would have these dreams about ruling over an empire, of being feared and respected and every time he took a life, those dreams seemed closer to his bloody grasp. Although he hated taking orders, he became obedient to the never-ending pain. There was nothing he wouldn’t do to move up the ladder, but it would be a while till he could see a light.

Throughout this struggling livelihood, he did have one small, precious source of sun in his life. You.

Anytime he could, he would come watch you. Sometimes just small glimpses to get him through the day. Watching you on a stake out, prance around town, or just lounge about in your room. It was the most dangerous thing he did since you were a cop. Every time he went to you, he risked everything, but he was extra careful. There were times where he almost got caught, like the time he was masturbating in your bushes as you walked around with a towel on – don’t look so disgusted, he was just a dumb kid – but thankfully you never did find him. On the contrary, you helped him build all the stealth he’d need for his future.

In some ways, he thought of you as the better half of him. A person whose existence was nothing but a cause for regret, yet you didn’t let that corrupt you, unlike him. You were better than him – righteous and kind. Deep down inside, you were who he wanted to be.

Now that he was free of that monster’s grasp, he would imagine walking up to you as a free kid man. Wondering if you would remember him. He didn’t know what he would say, if there was anything at all he could have told you. It was a yearning he didn’t understand, he was just too young and unsettled.

The kid was content with watching you from far away because he knew he wasn’t worthy of you. It still didn’t stop him from being utterly in love with the thought of you alone.

That night he saw you leave the station. He observed you outside the bar’s window getting wasted. There was a strange feeling he had that night as you left a drunk mess, stumbling towards your 2012 Hyundai Accent and rushing out of the parking lot. The kid would soon learn to always trust his instincts.

He was driving right behind you, making sure he kept his distance. You were one hell of an officer, no doubt. Nevertheless, you were too out of it that night to tell anyone was tailing you. It all happened too quickly. The clumsy driving, the crash, and the aftermath. His heart almost jumped out of his chest when he saw you skid, pressing his own break as hard as he could. But you were able to stop before you crashed into anything, much to his relief.

The kid was trying to think about what he could do. You weren’t too hurt, were you? Should he come out and help you? He didn’t even care about the other car, just observing you in the far distance. As he continued to think, he decided he would come out and see if there was any way he could help you.

And as soon as he clicked his door open, he watched you do something he never would have imagined.

He saw you drive off.

It took a minute to realize what just happened. And the kid had always been observant, so he knew exactly what you were thinking. For the first time that night, he looked over at the other car.

These people could destroy you. Everything you have worked so hard for. He knew exactly why you had to leave. But he couldn’t do something like that. The kid had to help you, just like you did for him at one point.

So, he did the only thing he knew how. He drove up to the edge where their car hanged halfway. There were people yelling from inside, he could hear children. The car began blaring their horn as soon as they saw him drive up.

He drove up really close, close enough that his bumper banged against theirs.

_

Your mind was a blank state.

“He pushed them off.” Jungkook finishes off calmly.

You let out the breath you were holding, your bottom lip quivering softly. “Is…is that why-”

“Yeah. That’s why when you came back a minute later…they were gone.”

They were gone. Everything was as clear as day. You remember driving off, rushing even harder than before as you cried your heart out. It was such a stupid and rash decision – so fucking stupid. Half a minute later, you stepped on the break once again. As your car came to a halt, all you could hear were your sobs and the immobile engine. Your body hurt, everything hurt so, so, so much.

Was it worth it? Is gaining your father’s love worth killing someone over? Slowly, you glanced at the rear view mirror. Looking at the girl with swollen eyes. She wasn’t someone you recognized. The promise to serve and protect rings in your ears. All you were in this moment, was a hypocrite. You didn’t deserve anyone’s praise if this was your reality, you didn’t deserve anyone’s pity.

It was really dark out, and you found the slightest comfort in the world’s shadow. You bit your bottom lip, trying to stop your tears. It didn’t work – it was useless. All worth nothing.

Which is why you screamed out on the top of your lungs, banged your fists against the wheel before turning your car back around.

No matter what happens…you had to save them.

And you tried to. Within a minute, you were back where you before. But once you got there, that one place you’d never forget – those shrubs, the cliff, that road – they were gone. You got out, looking around, hoping that the family survived. The cliff itself was too high and the night was too dark to see below. Pulling at the strands of your hair, screaming out ‘hello?’, you appeared mad.

Till this day you don’t know if it was your gut instinct or an entity bigger than you that gave you a sign, if not the newspaper a few days later, you just knew they were dead. You fell to your knees – a broken woman. Not having any idea of those dark eyes that cried along with you that damned night.

Not until now.

Jungkook was the one who killed them, but how much does that change, really? It was still you who drove off, still you who left them in his hands. You were so deep in thought that you didn’t hear the sound of the interrogation room’s door cranking open. The man opposite you kept his eyes unflinchingly on you, waiting for this all to come to an end.

The last thing you felt was something heavy against the back of your head before you fell unconscious.

“Shit- that was so hard you bastard, I told you to use the chloroform shit.” Jungkook shouts at the man holding the gun’s handle.

“I couldn’t fucking find it, I told you that at the house, kid. Besides, she’s a big girl, she’ll be fine.” The man puts the barrel back in his holster before ripping his badge off his belt and throwing it aside.

“Shut the fuck up and uncuff me, Jimin.”

The blonde sighs, grabbing his keys from his back pocket.

“Tells me to infiltrate a police department, forces me to befriend and stalk some random cop girl, makes me hang out with those pigs. Fucking prick.” Jimin murmurs under his breath as he paces over and unlocks the shackles on said prick.

Jungkook winces, grabbing his wrist and twisting it around to get some circulation going. Then he stretches his neck before standing up and dusting his pants. Fuck, this chair was uncomfortable. He points at some fresh blood staining the elder’s chin, prompting him to wipe it off.

“So, what’s the situation outside?”

“Me and Kane took care of all of them. We took our time with Hyun, like you wanted. Now Kane’s waiting in the van for us.”

“Good.” Jungkook nods, looks like everything went according to plan. He glances over at your limp form and walks up to where you sat insentient. With a huff, he got on his knees so he could see your face up close, like he’s always wanted to.  

“I can’t believe this day is here.”

Jimin looks between you both. “What are you gonna do with her?”

The younger cups your cheek. “You know I was ecstatic that night. I was…fuck, I never thought you could be with me. But that night, you proved that you were meant to be mine. And I waited so long for this moment. This moment where I could introduce myself to you as your equal. It’s why I was out on that mill this morning, detective. I wanted to meet you so much that it hurt.”

…That wasn’t an answer to his question but Jimin knew not to further bother his boss. There probably was a lot he had planned for you, but he wasn’t going to say it. No one ever really knew what this kid was thinking, anyway. He was a cryptic bastard.

Jungkook turns towards Jimin and extends his free hand out to him. Without being asked, Jimin reaches into his front pocket and pulls out the old handkerchief. His boss usually didn’t go this long without holding it. He places it into the younger’s hand without a word.

Turning back around, Jungkook places the cloth right underneath your shut eyes. He gently wipes away the tears leaking out.

“No one will ever hurt us again, doll.” Jungkook whispers before standing back up.

He places the handkerchief back in his own pocket and moves in to pick you up bridal style. Safely tucking you in his arms.

“Lead the way.” He orders Jimin who nods before opening the door of interrogation room 4.

___

This is absolute trash :))) I hope ya’ll enjoy tho. Lemme know what you thought, srsly because this fic stepped out of a certain comfort zone for me. I am absolutely open to part 2 if ya’ll want. if there is something you’re curious about, ask away.

[halsteadshailey]

A little too much fun

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Upstead, Mancel and Stellaride at Molly’s oneshot

——

Set sometime after last week’s eps (all of them are pre-established)

——

*slight language*

——

can also be read on ao3 and wattpad

——

“Are you coming?” Hailey called up the stairs to Jay who was taking an abnormally long time to grab his shoes.

The couple had moved in together just over a month into dating, anyone on the outside may think that they were moving too fast, but to them, they’d waited long enough. So over the past few weeks Jay had slowly been moving his things into Hailey’s apartment and now that they had finally sold his place, it was official.

“Yeah I’m ready, sorry” Jay replied as he came down the stairs.

“What took you so long?” his partner questioned.

“I couldn’t find my shoes” he said honestly “I guess I’m still getting used to living here”

“We’ll get used to it, I don’t plan on letting you leave anytime soon” Hailey responded with a light chuckle and placed a soft kiss on Jay’s lips.

“Oh, don’t worry, wouldn’t have it any other way” Jay said as he reached for Hailey’s hips to pull her closer and kissed her again.

After a moment they broke apart and Hailey checked her phone for the time.

“Come on, we gotta go, the others are probably already there” she stated as she laced her fingers between Jay’s and pulled them both through the door, locking it behind her.

—

Stella was just waking up from a nap when she got a message from Hailey.

‘Sorry we might be a little late, but we’re on our way, see you in a bit’

“Shit” the firefighter whispered under her breath as she nudged her sleeping boyfriend awake. “Kelly, we gotta get up, we said we’d meet Hailey and the others at Molly’s”

The pair had been on shift the previous day and got home from one of the longest nights of their life that morning. Call after call they couldn’t seem to catch a break so, naturally, when they got home they slept.

Luckily they had both already showered so all they needed to do was get changed and go, they also happened to live a lot closer to the bar than Jay and Hailey did so time was on their side.

Once they were both changed and Stella had put a little bit of make up on they were out the door and on their way, due to the location of their apartment, they would actually be on time.

—

Natalie and Crockett made it to Molly’s first out of the three couples but they weren’t there long before Stella and Kelly showed up, closely followed by Hailey and Jay.

Nat had told Crockett about Hailey’s invitation to meet her and the other first responders at Molly’s last week and at first he was hesitant, simply because he still felt like the new guy but he quickly accepted when Nat talked some sense into him saying something along the lines of ‘Well the best way to change that is to get out and spend time with your friends, otherwise everyone will see you as the new guy forever’. He knows that he’s not technically new anymore anyway, but because of the pandemic it had been hard to be social. This meant he had made few friends outside of the hospital and despite being there a whole year before the pandemic hit, back then he was actually the new guy meaning he was just trying to get settled and wasn’t too focussed on making friends.

The group of six however had grown fairly close after spending a few long nights at Molly’s together. Stella and Hailey had become friends very quickly after Hailey helped the firefighter out when she got a bad feeling on a call and together they found the abducted kids.

This naturally lead Kelly and Jay to spend some time with each other once the detectives’ relationship was out in the open. Natalie and Crockett seemed to fit perfectly into the group, Nat being good friends with the girls already and as for Crockett, he fell into conversation easily with Jay and Kelly, all three guys having a similar sense of humour and a shared love of sports.

This was the first night that they had actually planned that all six of them would spend together and it was an idea that Hailey and Nat had when the police officer brought a victim into Med.

“Hey guys, sorry we’re late” Hailey said as her and Jay made their way to the table where their friends were sitting.

“It’s all good, nice to see you guys” Crockett replied.

Jay smiled and offered to buy the first round.

The six of them sat together at the table for the better part of an hour, sharing stories, laughing, talking about anything but work. It was like a breath of fresh air that none of them knew they needed.

Eventually the guys split off from their partners as the game started and made their way to the bar to watch it on the TV.

The girls remained at the table, looking over at their boyfriends occasionally and not being able to help but smile.

“So how are you and Jay doing?” Stella asked Hailey “ya know, with living together and being out in the open and all”.

Jay and Hailey has revealed their relationship to their colleagues just a few weeks before they started to move Jay’s stuff in. They figured it was time to tell everyone (if they didn’t already know) and they knew there was no way they’d be able to hide it once they lived together anyway.

They went to Voight first, he told them he’d known for a while but as long as it wasn’t affecting how they worked, which it wasn’t, he didn’t plan on saying anything until they did. They signed all the HR forms that they needed to and Voight told them he was glad to see them both happy and that they deserved it after everything. The partners were very relieved and grateful towards their boss and how he reacted to this new level of their relationship.

Like Voight, the rest of the unit were very congratulatory towards the partners when they were told the news, and they all payed up when Kevin reminded them that he had guessed the closest therefore won the bet. The team had had a bet on when the detectives would get together since Jay got kidnapped and shot trying to help Angela, they knew it was only a matter of time until the detectives admitted their feelings that everyone else could see were there but seemingly they had no idea about.

“It’s going great” Hailey responded “living together has been really fun and our relationship has never been a problem at work” she finished with a smile and a quick glance at her boyfriend who was now on the edge of his seat which she assumed had everything to do with the game they were watching.

“How about you? How are you guys doing?” Hailey added referring to the slight mishap that Stella and Kelly had made it through.

“Yeah is that all over now?” the doctor at the table questioned.

“Yeah yeah, we’re doing fine. You know, Kelly’s Kelly and I wouldn’t change him for anyone, but sometimes he can be a real piece of work” Stella said.

“I hear that” Natalie responded receiving a laugh from her friends.

“And what about you Nat? How’s your hot surgeon boyfriend?” Stella asked in a teasing tone with a chuckle.

“Ahh he’s good” she replied with a smile “funniest guy i know” she added receiving an ‘aww’ from both Hailey and Stella.

The three girls carried on chatting, often gazing over at their boyfriends when they celebrated something in the game or when one of them said something causing the other two to laugh loud. All three were beyond happy right where they were in that moment.

About half an hour later the game was over and the guys made their way back over to the table.

“Hey guys, how was the game?” Nat asked no one in particular as her boyfriend took a seat next to her and she leant against his side.

“Great! We won” Kelly said as he placed his hand on Stella’s neck and sat down beside her.

“We could tell” she replied, referring to the loud cheers that came from the bar when the game finished.

Jay took a seat next to Hailey and put his arm over her shoulders with his hand hanging down by her side, the perfect place for her to play with his fingers. This was something she did very often when they were eating or drinking together, whether it was across the table or leant against his side it still sent a spark through his arm to his heart.

As it got later and later the bar started to empty and eventually the group decided to call it a night. They all grabbed their jackets off the back of their chairs and made their way outside once they’d thanked Herrman who had been serving them all night.

Once they were outside they all parted ways. Kelly had his arm around Stella as she was attempting to keep him steady since he’d maybe had one too many to drink. Seeing as she still felt pretty beat from their last shift she, on the other hand, hadn’t had much to drink so was still able to drive.

Differently, neither Natalie or Crockett had held back on the drinking since they were both coming off a week being on call and not being able to drink at all so after Nat and Hailey hugged goodbye, Crockett grabbed his girlfriend’s hand and helped her into the cab he’d called.

Hailey and Jay were also probably ok to drive but decided against it based on the fact that they didn’t actually live that far away and it would definitely be safer to walk.

It was a cold evening so Hailey was hugged closely into Jay’s side as they started walking, one of her hands in her pocket and one around his back, his in a similar way but due to their height difference his non-pocketed hand was over her shoulders not around her back.

—

‘Tonight was really fun, thanks for inviting us all Hailey’ Nat sent to the group chat with Hailey and Stella that they had made one evening for a reason they can’t remember as her and Crockett made it back into her apartment.

“Hey, thanks for making me go tonight, I really do love spending time with the guys” Crockett expressed to his girlfriend as he took his shoes off and hung up their jackets.

“Is it only the guys you wanted to spend time with?” Nat responded in a flirty tone.

Crockett smiled and decided to play along “Yeah, well, there is this one girl that I wanted to see”

“Oh yeah, who would that be?” Nat said as she looped her arms around his shoulders.

“She’s a doctor at Med actually” he continued the joke “brunette, really pretty, funny too” the surgeon continued as he placed his hands on Natalie’s hips.

“Hmm, she sounds great”

“Oh, she is”

And with that, the couple connected lips and he lifted her up as she wrapped her legs around his waist. Their kiss deepening as they made their way into the bedroom.

—

Stella and Kelly’s arrival to their apartment was a different story. Stella parked her truck outside and they steadily made it up the stairs to their door. Keeping Kelly close to her side, she unlocked it and made her way straight towards their bedroom where she lay her already half-asleep boyfriend down.

She attempted to keep him awake long enough to get him changed but she very quickly gave in to just removing his shoes and his jacket then laying down next to him after getting herself changed and falling asleep too.

—

“Hails?” Jay called from their bed as he heard the shower turn off.

“What’s up?” his girlfriend responded as she walked out of the bathroom towel drying her hair.

“Your phone’s been going off, Nat and Stella saying thanks” he explained, handing her her phone.

“You reading my messages huh?” Hailey prodded playfully as she folded the towel up and put it down, climbing in to bed next to Jay and taking her phone from him.

He couldn’t think of anything witty to say in response so instead he gave her a quick kiss on the lips and pulled her close to him.

On their walk home they had both admitted that they weirdly weren’t that tired so Jay decided to find something for them to watch on TV while she checked her phone as they lay side by side, his arm behind her head and their legs tangled together under the bed sheets.

Hailey let out a quiet laugh as she opened the group chat and saw a picture of Kelly passed out in bed that Stella had sent followed by a message saying, ‘some of us maybe had too much fun’.

Her laugh caused Jay to turn to look at her phone too, the picture making him chuckle. “I’m honestly not sure how Kelly had so much more to drink than me or Crockett” he said, causing Hailey to laugh.

She put down her phone and hugged closer into Jay’s side, placing her head on his chest. He placed a kiss in her hair and they both turned their attention to the TV and fell asleep pretty quickly, clearly a little more tired than they had originally thought.