#the foxhole court headcanon

[disastersappho]

i’m cackling imagining criminal-justice-major-andrew minyard as a paralegal. like he’s simultaneously really good at his job bc of his eidetic memory. but is also an absolute asshole to attorneys. and occasionally alludes to having committed felonies.

[not-a-user-jussanidiot]

Something something thinking about the extra content where Andrew asks Neil to live together by telling him that "if he wants more than two chairs and a bed" he needs to think about all the furniture himself. Neil taking the job pretty seriously because due to his life on the run he now associates material possession with stability and he really wants to make sure this feels like a forever home and that he's not going anywhere, for once.

Neil ending up buying a bunch of stuff that he doesn't know how to build (never built furniture in his life) and Waymack coming in clutch to help, having a bonding moment with his now-fully-functional-grown-adult kid that almost died a few times and went against the fking mafia being like "what do you MEAN you don't know how to use a damn screwdriver?!!"

[tankuare]

Andrew was such a yapper when he was on his meds I like to think that when Neil and him get comfortable in their relationship he goes right back to yapping 24/7

[doesephs]

cosplay as an exy goalpost, it’s the only way they’d ever hit on you

[linecrosser]

so, i saw This Post by @moreau29 and... yes. all the yes. headcanon accepted.

[feelingthedisaster]

little hc that andrew knows the exy regulations book word by word (yk, edeitic memory) but pretends to not know the rules until one day kevin says something that is slightly incorrect, a miniscule error no one else would recognize, so andrew goes "well, actually..." and qoutes the rule, just to make him mad

[floretissogay]

neil and andrew rly are THAT couple that are constantly matching but not because they're trying to be cute– neil just never buys himself anything so andrew starts getting two of everything he buys

[walkingcorpse03]

i fell to my knees in kmart

[cowpants147]

I neeedddd more Foxes on TikTok content! Them doing their own versions of trending videos and challenges like the "dress up as something that starts with your first initial challeneg"

Allison, looking ethereal dressed like a literal Greek God, glammed to the heavens: I'm Allison, I'm dressed as Aphrodite and it's the onw year anniversary of my boyfriends death so I better be the drunkest tonight.

Renee, wearing a real leather F1 jacket/jumpsuit that Allison for some reason has in her closet with a blow up steering wheel in her hand: I'm Renee, I'm a race car driver and I think Nicky might be the drunkest.

Andrew, dressed exactly the same as normal but has a stethoscope around his neck and a piece of paper saying "Aaron" duct taped to his chest just stares into the camera for 30 seconds until it's obvious Allison will not be leaving without an answer: when Kevin starts puking I'm leaving.

Once everyone has given their answer the video enda with a pic of Nicky and Kevin passed out in a bathtub together.

Or the Trauma Dump Candy salad video which goes off the rails immediately and PSU makes them take down 3 hours after posting

"Hiiiiiii, I'm Nicky and I'm a gay teenage father of two and I brought Nerd Cluster Gummies"

"I'm Aaron and instead of going to rehab my evil doppelganger locked me in a bathroom w a blanket and a weeks worth of canned food and I brought Reeces"

"I'm Allison and my parents didn't even yell at my brother when he got expelled from boarding school for having coke in his room but I got kicked out of the house when I showed up to my deb ball with a black eye and a busted lip after playing (and winning) an exy game. They didn't even ask if I was OK. And I brought cherry flavoured Twizzlers"

"I'm Neil ans whenever I burn something while cooking I have a panic attack cause I start to think about burning my mother dead body in a ditch on the beach and I brought ... Andrew what are these called? Oh, I brought sour patch kids"

"I'm Kevin, I grew up in a cult and I brought raisins" except he's body tackled by a blonde blur before he gets a chance to dump the raisins into the bowl.

Them posting stupid shit to popular sounds:

Aaron, sat on the couch, study notes laid out around him, energy drink cans littering the place: I want to sit back and enjoy my my evening when all of a sudden ...

Camera flashes across the room to Neil just minding his own business: ... I hear this aggravating, grating voice

***

The "My Shalya" sound over clips of Neil absolutely violating people.

***

Zoom up of Kevin in full Queen Day sttess mode on the sidelines of practice with the sound "yes I'm a drama queen, but it's not by choice" playing over it and when it gets the "it's genetic" part the video zooms out to show Wymaxk next to him with the exact hand on hip, stressed look on his face

***

Renee doing the "actually I do cuss a little" sound while she's getting her gear on to spar with Andrew and when it reaches the "probably fuck" portion of the audio the clip switches to her taking Andrew downnnn. And then there's a beat drop just cause.

***

Another edit of Neil but with the "am I the drama? I don't think I'm drama" sound.

***

Upperclassmen scrolling through news articles or flipping through sports news channels rhag are reporting on them while miming along to "is this fucking play about us"

***

Some teammates, probably upperclasmen, definitely Nicky also miming along to "I'm sorry, not everybody fits in the bad bitch genre, it's a genre, not everybody fits on the he roster" while dressed in full exy uniform, with the caption "when you're coach only recruits the most traumatised bitches"

And forcing teammates to do "day in the life" "what i eat in a day as a member of the most fucked up exy team" and "ootd" videos.

Andrew (bribed with alcohol, ice cream and ten dollars) does a What I Eat in a Day as depressed mother of 3 whose forced to play stickball. There's no sound, its just the picture carousel style w block letters next to pics of his food:

Breakfast is a massive mug of hot chocolate with half a can of squirty cream and marshmallows.

Breakfast 2 is a big bowl of whatever sugary flavour cereal that's overflowing w E Numbers and almost illegal food dye you guys have in the US.

Snack 1 is a chocolate bar.

Lunch is a slice of pizza, fries and then there's a hand forcing salad onto his plate. Andrew adds a note to this pic saying "I'm allergic to green, Kevin's trying to kill me"

Snack 2 is a an energy drink and a cigarette

Dinner is a pint of ice cream

Midnight snack is just a pic of Neil which Andrew thinks is an obvious coming out without coming out vibe but everyone is immediately worried about Neil's safety and there endals up being a Reddit thread about Andrew being a cannibal.

Then they post a follow up video of Kevin reacting to this and he just watches on in despair saying "no. no. Andrew you have a nutritionist!"

[little2nerdy]

during the off-season and after he retires neil is one of those people that just does every single fun run, marathon, race, etc. that he can find, even some of the big ones like the Boston Marathon or the New York City marathon - just for fun

sometimes the original foxes show up if they’re in a city nearby to cheer him on, andrew is always there in the background looking incredibly pissed off but he’s always so proud of neil at the end because even though Neil is running, he always comes back to him

[skyddish]

one of the foxes seeing neil's drivers license pre-TKM: Who's Alex?

Neil: I think the better question is, "Are you a narc?"

[disastersappho]

the sunshine court really put the original trilogy in a new light bc we finally see just. regular college students. they go to get boba. they have a cute gay apartment. they actually go to classes. and then we have jean, neil, andrew, kevin, and the rest of the foxes who are just Not Having a Normal Time between unresolved oodles of trauma, not a single stable home life in sight, oh also and the literal mafia. — their metric for being Okay is just,,, not helpful. but trying to picture jean just like— in my econ section. hanging out at someone’s bday party on a saturday in socal. my man holding a corona and having no idea what to do with his hands. i cannot.

[currently-evil]

Andreil in Nutshell

Not included: rest of the foxes sideeyeing them nervously

[tankuare]

Neil Josten said “I want to see you lose control” and we expected Andrew to recover from that???

[2close2thesun]

i’m so sorry to say this about your fave but neil josten was definitely one of those kids in high school who started off their narrative assignment with “It was the night of the big game…”

this man has conquered unspeakable horrors and when given the prompt “write about a time you overcame something difficult,” he’d write about how his high school exy team won at the last minute…. (the man has been abused and tortured)

[hmmm-shesucks]

One night, Aaron FaceTimes Andrew, and he is sobbing, but before Andrew can ask what’s wrong or even panic, Aaron flips the screen to show the twins and asks them who is who. They say their names, and then Aaron says no, and they just giggle and tell him not to be silly; they know their names, and Aaron’s like, clearly not, and then asks again, and they switch names. Aaron flips the camera back around, telling Andrew they’ve been doing it for hours, and he can’t tell them apart anymore. When Andrew asks where Katelyn is because she has never once mixed the twins up in their three years of life, Aaron flips the screen again, and Katelyn is laughing so hard on the other side of the couch that she's not even making noise anymore. Neil literally almost pees his pants because he’s laughing so hard, as well, and Andrew, after telling Aaron who’s who because Andrew has even the most minuscule difference memorized, he tells the twins to keep up the good work and then hangs up.