#the feeling will pass...eventually...and then come back...and then pass again

[drowninginblox]

Thank you @possumtion for allowing me to make a drabble out of your work! You rock and keep up the amazingness!!

"Hey, furball?" Logan growled from the front passenger's seat. It was late. Really, really late when the X-Mansion had to be evacuated. Something something mansion’s rubble.

Everyone got out okay and you called a cousin to house all these displaced mutants, but after the hustle and bustle of everything that's happened in the last 7 hours... Yeah. You weren't surprised to see Kurt curled into himself. "Logan, he's out cold." You whisper through a smile. "We're thirty minutes away from the safe house," Logan warned before returning to the front window.

You take a moment to look at the passing terrain. All of you were bordering the Maine and the Canadian. To the point where the woods where to the two blurred served as a great hiding spot. The dark blues and blacks of night where lightening with the up coming dawn. Yet they couldn’t distract you from the masterpiece you’ve been sharing the backseat with. A small smile and contemptuous sigh ease you back into the comfort of knowing that he’s safe.

You've been pining for Kurt for a long time. Honestly, it's impressive. All the X-Men know outside of the object of your affection. And given your history with relationships, you were absolutely fine with that being the case.

Pinning has been your closest friend and that bitch is back to hold you through the feelings while your eyes lingered on him. The peaceful demeanor, the way his chest rose and fell in a subtle but smooth rhythm, even the reactions of his tail flicking between the crevice of his toes in response to his sweet dreams. If he even was dreaming... you hoped that he was. He deserved to dream.

Eventually, you broke away from him just to see the soft light of a… well… “Well look at what being a Potts can do for you…” Morph said a little too loud as they got closer to the property. You can only tap them as a way to get them to shut up. “One, by marriage. And Two, distant.” You gritted “Do not get used to this.” Logan chuckled lightly as he cracked open a window, allowing the soft crunch of the driveway to make itself known.

While he lit a cigar, you noticed Kurt stirring out of the corner of your eye. You leaned back in your seat as he slowly opened his tired eyes “Mmm…” he mumbled. You can only smile softly. As sad as you were to see his sleep interrupted, the sight before you was nothing less than adorable.

You watched as he stirred, eventually putting a hand on his knee and shake it a little “Hey,… hey Kurt… cmon… we’re here.” You say softly. His eyes slowly open while you move your hand away. “Hey hero. Cmon. We got room and board. No need to sleep in the car.” Morph snorts “Little bit of an understatement, huh Y/n?” You give Morph an even look from the mirror, making them raise their hands in defense as they park.

“Hey, hey- sor-ry!” You roll your eyes as you, Logan and Morph head out. Kurt meanwhile, takes his time to stretch. You do the same once you’re out, glancing over to Kurt through the still open door. “Hey Kurt, ya alright?” He only gives a heavy yawn, to which you chuckle “You want some help big guy?”

He shakes his head with another large yawn, showing off those fangs of his. You laugh again and close your door, making your way to his side of the car. Once you get there, you open his door to see his eyes still closed. “Cmon man,” he sighs “Y/n-“

“Don’t start with me Kurt. I will carry you.” He manages to partially open eyes “You would?” You nod. “Just cus I’m not an XMan anymore dosent mean I can’t pick ya up.” He smiles softly. “Ok okay… let me get out…” you offer your hand, to which he takes, guiding him out of the car. “Princess, jump up, or fireman?” You offer even though you already know the answer. He laughs “Is that even a question?” You smile and ready your arms.

His arms immediately wrap around your neck while you ready for his legs “One, two,…” he jumps and you hold his thighs with ease. “Okay spider monkey, let’s get ya to bed.” He only sighs against your chest as you walk inside.

Tony Stark’s house shouldn’t be as surprising to you by now. But every time you step into a different iteration, there’s always a new surprise. “Smaller kitchen… bigger living room… of course the wine cabinet is next to the flat screen…” you mumble as you take note of the accommodations. Kurt traces shapes into your back and arms as you do so, humming loosely to your notes “Ah… sorry Kurt. Don’t worry, just a quick trip up the stairs…” you mumble into his hair. “I gotcha. Just close those eyes.” You glance to see Morph covering their mouth while Logan glances knowingly. You send them a look, gaining a knowing smile from Morph and a shake of the head out of Logan before both turn away.

You lifted Kurt up a little more and cautiously made your way upstairs. Most of the guestrooms are on the lower level and all of which are filled, knowing your coworkers. You bypass Tony’s/Pepper's room, and head to the guestroom across from it. Peering inside allowed you to ensure that no one was in, entering as soon as the coast was clear. “ Okay, Kurt… we’re here, buddy.” You whisper “‘Time to get off the Y/n express.” You say with a chuckle. He matches it sleepily. “My hero…” he mumbled, loosening his hold on you when you carefully set him down. He hums and yawns at the mattress while you start to take your leave.

When he notices you leaving, he gets up “Mmm? Warte, hey- wohin gehst du? Where are you going?” You turn back. “Oh, uh… the couch. Or another guest room. Why?” He wakes up a little at that “Habe ich etwas falsch gemacht? Why would you?” He asks into the thick air. A blush creeps onto your face as his question stops everything. “What?” You whispered.

He pulls his legs up and sits on the edge of the bed “Y/n, you don’t have to leave…” you struggle to find your words, leaving a dense silence in the wake of his quiet offer. “Y/n, I trust you. I know we've never been in a situation like this before, and you obviously don’t have to if you don’t want to, but…” his tail disrupts the sheets on the bed from its gentle flicks back and forth. “Gott, das ist vielleicht egoistisch von mir, but I wouldn’t mind if you did. ” You hesitate but take a step away from the door. “Would this… is this platonic or…?”

Kurt’s eyes widened a little at that, processing the question in kind. Eventually, he holds the back of his neck and looks away “I- well Scheiße, … what would you want it to be?” You look down. You know you can be honest with him, always. Yet this is… “I don’t want to change anything,” he BAMFs to you, standing not even a foot away. “Y/n, nothing will change if you don’t want it to…” he assures as he takes a half step forward.

Now you’re only a few inches apart. It felt like every inch was just another painful reminder of the barrier you may be breaking. You can only hold yourself in your arms “Kurt…” you mumble “If you want what I want, then-“ “Then what Liebling? Tell me…” a hand ghosts and elbow. The room seems to get warmer.

“I-I want this, I do, but…” his gase faulters “Y/n… I-“ you swallow “Kurt… I don’t want this to be situational or… or fun… this is- I-“ you swallow your nerves and take a deep breath “It’s okay, It’s just me Y/n.”

“You say that like it’s supposed to assure me..” you chuckle while he smiles sheepishly. “We don’t have to talk about the implications or… whatever we want this to be if you don’t think you can. Or if you don't want to right now.” He hesitates but ends up holding your arm. “That can be for tomorrow. But if we do that, I need to say- that nothing. Truly, nothing will change if you don’t want it to. We could stay friends,” a hint of uncertainty laces his words “Or… we could be more… I-i would like that but,” you look up to him. “Yeah?” He moves his gaze from his arm to your eyes. “Yes… yes, I truly would. If you want to, of course. I swear Y/n, do not settle for me-“

“Wait wait- hold the fuck on, rewind?! What do you mean ‘settle for you?’” You say in a more normal tone, finally meeting his gaze. “If anything you would be settling for me!" His eyes widen "Wie bitte?" he breaths, but that doesn't stop you. "And do not say that I would be settling for you when you are the most attractive X-Man!" He takes a nervous step back "What?" Shock gives way to laughter as Kurt keeps his eyes on yours, seeing your genuineness not as delirium or a potential joke. Rather for what it is, the truth.

You smile and hold his cheek “Kurt, I’m not stupid. I know what beautiful is and I'd be lucky to have even five minutes with the most gorgeous man this side of the universe.” He chuckles as a light shade of violet peaks through his fur. “Well… then I think we should head to bed, Ja?” You can only kiss his cheek, making his face heat up more.

This was going to be the best night of his life.

Sleepy 😴😴😴

[moonlight-prose]

“please don’t make me say it if you aren’t going to say it back” with a desperately in love with joel reader would hit so much…

weaved around your finger like yarn

a/n: me writing for joel again?? this has sat in my inbox for over a year and i never meant to actually take this long with it. but i finally figured out how to write this concept. and now i am actually obsessed with the small world of softness i created for these two. this is yes jackson joel, but nothing bad happens ever to him because why would it? it's all fine right?

summary: he never made space in his life for love in the aftermath of destruction. the after of his life he once thought would extend past decades of gray hair, smile lines carved in around his mouth now set in frowns and sneers. but snowfall and alcohol blur the lines for both of you when winter comes to jackson.

word count: 1.6k+

pairing: joel miller x reader

warnings: not explicit, love confessions, heavy makeout sessions, alcohol consumption, tipsy joel, sad joel, laughter at the end of the world, hope.

He can't remember laughing until his stomach hurt. The ache that spilled into his chest, warming his insides with a sun like quality that left him shivering. He can't recall the feel of his cheeks pulled so wide the sensation became a phantom pain seconds after. He knows it happened. He can distinctly recall the jokes, the joy. But the laughter lingers like a ghost at the back of his mind—translucent and gray and distorted enough to feel false.

Alcohol simmers in his stomach with a rueful intent. A malignant aftermath that would hit him in a few hours after two months of attempted sobriety. Ellie insisted, he accepted. Easy enough to say. Difficult to follow through with.

He had his days where whiskey sounded better than the flavor of bacon Tommy would bring him in the early mornings. But the dismay in your eyes helped him hold off, regain his awareness of a world not yet shattered. For once in quite a long time...he finally lived. For you, for Ellie, for Sarah.

He lived to see his hair grow longer and the grays appear more frequently. To drink coffee in the mornings on a porch you were already settled on. To help you fix small things here and there in your cabin next door. He lived for your smile, the light in your eyes. The curve of your lips as they pulled up into bolstering peals of laughter—the furrow in your brow as you frowned from endless frustrations on long hard days.

Joel Miller lived to love you.

He existed to dig his heels in and wait shit out—it's what he was good at, what he knew how to do. But for you he relented quicker than ice on a hot asphalt driveway back home in Texas. His mind became sand that slipped through your giving hands—heart a fluttering mess that sang a tune he could never get right on the guitar stashed in his living room.

Days bloomed into weeks which grew into months. Eventually a year passed and what used to be difficult and awkward to be around people again, felt like breathing the fresh winter air. The jackets he managed to find hung on hooks by the door, a pair of heavy boots beside the small table Tommy crafted him.

The mornings were nice. When hot water hit ground coffee and the aroma plagued his kitchen for hours at a time. The evenings called you towards him—simple cooking skills shared in the confines of a home he pined for you to reside in.

Life was a sliver of peace he never imagined he'd get again. But the hole in his heart never faded, the pain still rang out sharp enough to have him clamping down on the inside of his cheek. And your smile made his stomach ache with a longing deep enough to scar.

Tommy told him to buck up and do something. Ellie called him a fucking idiot.

You...gave no indication you felt the same way. So silent and reserved he would remain.

Your feet slid on icy, fingers gripping tightly to his jacket with a yelp in a quick attempt to save yourself from slamming to the ground. Joel snickered loud and brash and a wash of embarrassment burned under frozen cheeks. Dragging you up, his arm looped tightly around your waist—hand pressed harsh and insistent to the small of your back. You swallowed the butterflies at the sight of his face flushed red—eyes shining from the effect of too much whiskey.

"We were bad tonight," you muttered, breath forming a cloud between your faces.

He grinned—skin buzzing at the close proximity of your form. "Only a little bit."

"You're not supposed to drink Joel."

Leaning in he traded his smile like a secret; you tucked it into your chest with a sharp breath. "I won't tell if you don't, darlin'."

"Joel..."

"C'mon. No one's gettin' in trouble here."

A blade pierced your heart brutally—spilling crimson along pale white snow. Even as Joel remained entirely unaware of how you clung to him. How your body called his name—your mind plagued with thoughts of his being, with images of his smile, with the sound of his raspy voice. He'd never know the way you cherished each moment with him. The mornings tucked away from an unruly world—the nights shared between friends who might one day be more.

Your teeth scraped along the cracked skin of your bottom lip, eyes cast up to the curl of his lips. The words sprang forth faster than you could drag them back. Your chest of secrets unlocked and bared to the man who drowned you in his small flecks of joy. Later you'd blame the alcohol. When the headache ravaged your head and an ache lingered between your thighs.

Later you'd comb over every small glance and breathy word.

"I like spending time with you Joel," you breathed, fingers toying with the front of his leather coat. "I like...um..."

The breath caught in his throat, gaze desperate to catch yours. "Yeah sugar?"

"It's a hard thing to say." Another cloud of your whiskey tinged breath filled the air.

"You can tell me anythin'. You know that right?" Even as hope flared bright and scorching through the width of his chest. "I'll listen."

Hesitation spilled into the night, your voice a soft whisper he barely caught. "Please don't make me say it if you aren't going to say it back."

Oh didn't you know?

Did you not see how his gaze dug beneath the layers of flesh and bone, of tendons and veins that clung to your form? Did you not understand he would take a bullet for you? That he'd bear the wound of a warrior's death to keep you alive? How could you not know that his love stuck to his tongue with a saccharine bitterness he swallowed down like the drugs he once took to numb his mind?

You healed pieces of his soul you never broke. A marred and fucked puzzle that was meant to find a home six feet underground. By his own hand no less. He was destined to die—born to suffer—yet you swathed him wool with the promise of a peaceful life.

A future etched by the hands of love.

"Say it," he pleaded, frozen hand cupping your cheek.

"It's more than just that." The breath you took shot adrenaline down his spine. "I like our mornings. I like our dinners and conversation. And even when you come into town with me. But I...I love..."

The glossy nature of your eyes created by unshed tears that pooled at your waterline dug the knife deep enough to meld it within his heart. You didn't know. You couldn't have. His silence, his hesitation, swallowed every emotion he might have told you—every secret uttered in the shadows of night that told only half his story.

He told you about Sarah. About their life together, about her smile. That in itself felt like a proclamation of love—a key to the heart he thought stopped beating long ago.

"I knew it would freak you out," you muttered, pulling away from his hold.

Only for him to panic. His hand gripped the back of your jacket, pushing you towards him hard enough for your feet to slip again. But your gasp was swallowed by the cold press of his mouth to yours. Lips chapped by the winter air slid against your parted mouth as you froze against his chest. Your hands hung listlessly at your sides. He kissed you tenderly, attempting to wake you from the spell of shock, but to no avail did it bring you back.

"'M sorry." His words were muffled against your chin, forehead pressed to yours and eyes squeezed shut. "I shouldn't have–"

The press of your fingers into his cheeks jolted him back—eyes wide as you dragged him back with a stifled moan. Your mouth found his tongue hot and wet along his bottom lip in a pleading motion he complied to instantly. Stepping forward he fell into you with a deep groan. One that echoed and vibrated right down to your stomach—one you savored with a lick along his back teeth.

Hands cupped your ass with an insistent need to mold you closer, fingers digging into the plush flesh he longed to bite and taste. You tasted like whiskey. You smelled like him. It made him dizzy with want, anxious to lead you back to his porch—to seat you on his kitchen counter in the mornings while the coffee went cold.

"Fuck I wanna take ya home sugar," he grunted, biting at your lower lip with a grin.

Your breathless reply made the hair stand on the back of his neck. "You can."

"No." He shook his head, stealing another kiss with a gritty moan. "Not tonight. 'M gonna do this proper."

"Proper," you smiled, tugging on the longer curls you refused to let him cut. "You're such an old man Miller."

The large breadth of his hand cupped your chin, pushing the cheeks he lightly bit into together. "Won't be sayin' that tomorrow when I ain't got all this fuckin' alcohol in me."

"Yeah?" The droop of your eyelids—the darkened iris now filled with lust—set his teeth on edge. His body hummed with a new buzz he craved since meeting you. "Prove it."

"Oh I will." He grinned sharply, licking his teeth like a wolf waiting to pounce. "Don't you worry 'bout that."

A glimmer in your eyes caught his attention, the grip on your face loosening. "You know I love you right darlin'?"

You smiled—big and bright—and Joel felt another piece of his soul set back into place. "I love you too Joel."

[beforetimes]

my headcanon about the alternate timeline we see in s2ep7 is that instead of ekko and powder being close friends throughout their childhoods who became lovers with no friction, it actually took a while for them to bridge the gap that vi's death caused.

when we see ekko and powder go to vi's memorial for the first time and ekko asks if she was the one who caused their death, powder very quickly retorts that it was ekko's tip that ended up sending them on the job that killed her. i think that this is important not just because the writers wanted to explicitly say that the chain of events that led to the original timeline hinged on ekko's tip but also because in how quickly she said it, we can assume that this is something that's come up between them before.

ekko already is seen as a character who carries a lot of responsibilities on his shoulders, mostly self-ascribed, which i tend to characterize as being born partially of guilt. i think guilt is a large part of his character and it would be somewhat irresponsible to shrug that off when speaking about his character in the alternate timeline that the original ekko drops in on.

powder is characterized as brighter and happier than jinx when she grows up in this universe with a support system, obviously, but she still has a tendency to anger. this is shown through how she tells ekko to get out before she does something she'll regret rather than rolling over in the face of his interrogation and insensitive statements. she also holds a grudge, as we see it takes ekko physically taking her to see vi's painted memorial in the firelight lair before she stops scowling at him in the bar and warms up to him again.

looking at all of these things, i think it's a fair assumption to make that following vi's death, there was a period of time where powder directly blamed ekko for what happened, and that ekko blamed himself as well. this, in my opinion, doesn't cheapen their relationship when they grow up into the people we see in s2ep7, but deepens it.

i think the act of forgiving is something that takes a long time, whether you're forgiving yourself or someone else, and ekko and powder's relationship being as comfortable and easy as it is in s2ep7 speaks to the fact that they had a long stretch of time to get to that space where they could move past the circumstances that led to vi's death. at least, they both do until original timeline ekko drops in and reopens that wound, which in turn leads powder to throw blame back in his face, similarly to how i assume she must have done directly following vi's passing.

the idea that powder and ekko in this alternate timeline had to move past anger, grief, guilt, and blame makes their relationship feel more heartfelt than if they were locked in since day one and there was no more work to be done. love as something that has to be earned and worked for even in a world where things seem mostly ideal shows that it wasn't just a fluke that they got together but a deliberate continuous choice to work through trauma to allow themselves to be together.

it also legitimizes the idea that original timeline ekko and jinx could hypothetically be together as well. not just because we see "oh, one version of powder and ekko can get together so this one can, too" but because both versions have baggage to work past before getting together, but the universe we see displays how this pair managed that with the luxury of a support system and a kinder environment that original timeline ekko and jinx unfortunately weren't afforded.

i think this also makes their team-up in s2ep9 more heartfelt because we can see ekko move past blame when he comes back for jinx to help in the fight, similarly to how i assume ekko in the alternate timeline had to work through his own to eventually get together with powder. both relationships hinge on the fact that they have to put effort in to get comfortable with each other following the consequences of the job that ekko sent them on rather than letting the alternate universe relationship ultimately act as a fluke that can't be replicated because of how drastically different that world is.

[revelboo]

U h, so like, I may or may not have gotten absolutely hooked on your blog 👉👈 I absolutely adore your fics with the Seeker Trine, I don’t see much of them out there so when I stumbled upon your little series, it got me good. I am super invested in each of the stories and I really, really like the way you right!! Looking forward to more :3

Thank you!

True Romance Pt 5

Seeker Trine x Reader

• Wings flaring out tiredly to stretch out the kinks, Starscream pauses in the door to the communal habsuite he shares with his trine before closing the door behind him, sprawled on his back with his head hanging off the edge of his berth Skywarp glances at him, jaw clenching, then his attention is back on the human laying against his chassis, his servos sliding along your back. Across the room, Thundercracker is fiddling with the communication screen, so engrossed in his project that he’s not even noticed his entrance. “What is this?”

• Startling, Thundercracker offers Starscream a sheepish smile. “Movie night? I’ve been watching some of their media and it’s pretty interesting,” he says, inclining his head toward you sleeping on Skywarp. And he waits for Starscream to tell him he’s too busy, because he always does that. Knows his brother is the SIC and stays buried under reports and requests, but he just wants them all together like it had been before the war. Before the Decepticons. At least for a little bit. The ‘no’ doesn’t come though as Starscream drifts closer to Skywarp, attention on you.

• “They were cold again,” Skywarp growls, annoyed at being caught tending to you when he shouldn’t care less. But he likes the warmth of you there against him, the softness that should be off putting to him. Your little cheek is against him, knuckles against his canopy. Trusting him enough to rest under his watch and he’s not sure what to make of that or why it spreads warm through his spark.

• “Always,” Starscream vents softly, reaching to pick you up. Noting the way Skywarp tenses, but doesn’t try to stop him even when you make a pitiful sleepy sound of protest until he cradles you to him. Head lifting to look up at him, seeing who has you, and immediately relaxing again. And he can’t understand this trust of yours. That you just accept this and them instead of raging to be freed.

• Feeling that thrum in your bones when Starscream cups you to him, you know you should be trying to escape. But there’s almost always at least one of them watching over you. They’re not your friends by any means, but as he runs a servo against you, you’re not sure they’re your enemies either. Know it’s just Stockholm’s ringing your bell, because they’re always fussing over you, bringing you things, food, whatever they think you might like. Trying to keep you happy when they don’t have to. You’re still a prisoner, but it’s harder and harder to see the bars of your cage every day, they just keep blurring with every gentle touch. They’ll get bored of you eventually and let you go. And you’re not sure how you feel about that. “Everything okay?”

• Sitting on his berth, Starscream looks down at you. Seeing you watching him in return. Always asking them about their day. Trying to collect intel on them to pass along to your government in case you manage to escape? That must be it, but he still finds himself telling you. And you just lay your cheek on his servo and listen, asking questions and agreeing with him. Like you might really care. Hating that he wants to believe that, because something is very wrong with him.

Previous

[sixerstanley]

Sealed With a Kiss - Teen Stancest ficlet

Hey all! I'm here with a bit of an appetizer, if you will, for a fic I've been thinking about for a while. The stans are 16/17 in this. Hope you enjoy! Please let me know what you think as I still have to work on the entire fic.

After Carla criticizes Stan's kissing, Ford offers to help him practice.

~~~~~~

“Ya sure ya still wanna do this, Sixer?”

Truthfully, Ford feels like he’s about to pass out—either that or puke. He isn’t used to this, isn’t used to sitting so close to Stan, not like this—not with him on Stan’s bottom bunk sitting cross-legged and Stan inches apart, their feet touching, and Moses, Ford can feel Stan’s breaths as he glances at his lips—

“Ford?”

He drags his gaze from Stan’s lips, back up to his eyes. They’re blown wide with…something, but Ford can’t exactly tell what.

“Uh…s-sorry,” he stumbles out, trying to shake himself out of it. “We can—we can still—”

A hand touches him gently, stopping the words from coming out of his mouth. Ford looks down at Stan’s hand intertwining with his own.

They fit perfectly, like they always did.

“Hey,” Stan says, voice quiet and serious, which is a bit odd to hear from him. “If you’re having second thoughts—”

“No,” Ford blurts out immediately. Stan's eyes grow a bit wider and he realizes his mistake, feeling his face burn up. 

“Uh…I just mean…” he trails off before taking a deep breath. He looks directly back at Stan with a newfound determination. 

“It’ll be a good thing for both of us. We can practice with each other and get ready for the real thing.”

Stan stares at him for a moment, Ford watching his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows.

It’s hypnotizing.

Then Stan is nodding. “Yeah. Sure, yeah. That makes a lotta sense.” He glances down at Ford’s lips for a split second, and Ford is really starting to question if he’s going to be able to do this without blowing his cover. “But to be fair, it’s not like I ain’t got the experience,” Stan says lowly, a teasing tilt to it.

Ford rolls his eyes. “Sure, but Carla still complained about it.”

“Hey. Watch it. At least I don’t need a robot.”

“You said you weren’t going to bring that up.”

“I say a lot of things.”

“Hey,” Ford starts, a significant weight to his words. “Are you sure you still want to do this? We don’t have to.”

Stan swallows again glancing down at Ford’s lips briefly. He tries not to stare at his throat again.

He fails.

“Nah,” Stan eventually drawls, although there’s an unusual bit of shakiness to it. “Like ya said, this will only make us better at it, y’know? It was a good idea of yours.”

An idea I had with no ulterior motives whatsoever, a small voice inside Ford’s head says. He internally tells it to shut up.

There’s a moment of silence before Stan leans in closer to Ford’s space. He feels his heartbeat start to increase like crazy, and he attempts to steady his breath. 

Stan places both of his hands on either side of Ford on the bed, crowding him. 

This is how I die. A heart attack from kissing my own twin brother.

“C’mon, Poindexter,” Stan murmurs, his voice soft and barely louder than a whisper. It sends shivers down Ford’s spine. “Show me what ya got.”

Now it’s Ford’s turn to swallow. 

He inhales deeply before he moves his shaky hands towards Stan’s face, cradling his jaw with his fingers at the back of his head.

He tries not to think about how good this feels so far even though they haven’t even started, tries not to think about how right it feels to be touching Stan like this, but it’s wrong, he shouldn’t feel like this, he shouldn’t feel this way about his own brother, he’s nothing but a disgusting little freak—

“Hey,” Stan’s voice interrupts the foggy cloud of thoughts in his head. It’s soothing, and calming in a comforting, familiar way. 

“Hey, hey,” Stan says again, moving one of his hands to Ford’s side, holding him. Ford tries not to jump at the sudden touch. “Relax,” Stan croons, lifting his other hand to Ford’s cheek.

And it really should be bad how grounding that is. How, at this moment, it truly feels like it’s just the two of them in the entire world.

“Relax,” Stan whispers this time, stroking Ford’s cheek with his thumb, and what can he possibly do other than positively melt under his touch?

He gazes directly into Stan’s dark eyes, and immediately, Ford knows this is it. This is the last moment he has to back out, to say no to this, and call it off without any permanent damage. 

This is the last moment he has before he finds out how Stanley kisses.

Every rational part of his mind is screaming at him, telling him to turn back now, but he realizes this could be his only chance to kiss the person he’s been in love with his entire life.

Any last bit of his resolve absolutely crumbles when Stan licks his lips, making them shiny and wet, and Ford leans in, finally pressing his lips to Stan’s.

He’s hesitant at first, not too sure what to do, but then Stan’s arms fully wrap around him, around his body, and his lips part a little bit and oh.

Ford can’t even bring it within himself to feel embarrassed about the small little whine that escapes him when Stan’s tongue swipes over his bottom lip, he needs more, he needs more, he needs Stan—

Their bodies draw closer together than ever, and Stan starts to press his weight against Ford as he lays down on the bed and just lets himself be kissed by his brother. 

This is wrong. We shouldn’t be doing this, a small voice in Ford’s head says.

But he doesn’t care. He doesn’t fucking care—he’s laying down with Stan’s sturdy body on top of him, and Ford does not care about right or wrong at this moment.

All he cares about is making sure that this never ends.

Ford opens up more for Stan, deciding to mimic the move he made earlier, a giddy feeling rising within him when he hears Stan groan in return. He wants to keep doing that, keep drawing noises out of Stan that he’d only been able to fantasize about before this.

Now that he has the real thing, he’ll never want to let go.

And that’s the real danger of it all, isn’t it? That this is supposed to be nothing but practice. Something to help the both of them when it comes to other people.

It would be selfish of him to keep these pseudo-lessons going. Stan is with Carla, and even if they break up, Stan is going to find someone else, because he always does, he’s Stan.

It would be wrong to continue this purely because of his own desires. 

Stan pulls apart from him, both of them breathing heavily. He looks down at Ford, hovering over him, and wow having Stan on top of him is going to fuel his dreams for decades to come.

“Was that…was that okay?” Stan asks, gently petting Ford’s hair with one hand, looking down at his lips again.

He should say something. He should stop this.

He needs to stop this.

But looking up at Stan like this, with his eyes blown wide open with what he can pretend is desire…Ford thinks he can be a little selfish. 

At least for a little while.

He’ll let himself have this for a bit, let himself know how Stan feels against him, how he tastes, how he sounds when he’s overwhelmed by pleasure.

Ford will memorize it if he has to. He knows he will. 

After all, Stan is going to end up with someone else. Someone who isn’t him.

Shouldn’t he be able to enjoy himself while it lasts?

“Sixer?”

Ford raises a hand to Stan’s face, cusping it gently. 

“I think we need a bit more practice.”

[synthetickitsune]

To Save The World ✧ h.js

Pairing: Joshua Hong x gn!reader Genre: angst Summary: Joshua made his choice. Now he has to commit to it. The world must go on. And for that, he has to make you go. Word count: 1.6k Warnings: blood, knives, reader dies A/N: inspired by @chugging-antiseptic-dye's post here bcs you can't say "joshua slitting your throat" and expect me to be normal, and also it's highly recommended to read this as well

The night falls. The stars twinkle above, yet the light seems dimmed. The world must be asleep. Perhaps it might be as kind as to close its eyes to what he’s about to do. If there’s one thing the world’s always been good at, afterall, it’s turning away from those who need its help the most. There's a duty to them that he always carried on his shoulders. He’s always tried to make up for what the universe couldn’t do. Now that he’s in need of help, however, who will save him? 

He never thought that burden would eventually end up being his own demise.

Joshua’s breath comes out as thin clouds that soon evaporate into nothingness. Just the same as him. Every breath is a thought, a memory, a part of him. He wills them to be. He needs to send them all off, so that he can at least hope to be saved one day. He hopes the wind can carry all of him far enough that he won’t be tainted. 

He spent what felt like hours standing under scalding water. As if filth can be washed ahead of time. 

Anyway. 

Washed as best as he could make it and free of all scent, he feels naked. A blank sheet. Now all that’s left is to cleanse himself of himself. Not a man, but a hero. A fragile puppet dancing however fate and duty pull its strings. Empty. To be filled again with a different substance. Transformed. A copy of himself only on the outside.

The cold makes him feel frozen in time. If it doesn’t start ticking again soon, he will surely lose his mind. But perhaps that’s an option he’d gladly take. There is little chance of that happening soon enough, though. No, it’s not going to happen until it’s too late.

He hears lone footsteps slowly approaching. Bile rises up his throat. He closes his eyes and takes a couple of long, deep breaths. He tries to keep them even. To keep the tremors out of his breathing at least. He can’t be heard. He has to keep standing but his knees can barely support him. If only the darkness of the alley could swallow him. If only the wall behind his back could turn into goo. Trap him like an insect in tree sap. Keep him trapped in amber so that everyone could witness his cowardice that even outweighs the sin he’s about to commit.

‘Hero’ is a funny world. A joke.

In the end, he couldn’t save everyone. Forget everyone. Just one person.

The sound gets closer. Have you always walked with a skip in your step when you were rushing home to him? The bile again. His stomach twists. He has to force himself to swallow. The street remains empty. Everything else aside, Joshua can’t let anyone see his face ever again. He won’t ever look at his face again. His hands feel clammy. He can’t breathe. He can’t—

The knife almost slips from his hand. He only sees your side profile for a split second. He can’t double over. Not now. He’s already a coward hiding in the shadows. So it feels like a cruel joke, the sight that his eyes let him see. It’s like the clouds part and you’re suddenly bathed in moonlight. Are the stars taking you before he can? He only has fractions of a second to pray it is so. To hope his hands will pass right through you. That the moon saves you and cradles you in its cold silver arms.

It’s with practiced ease that he reaches from his hiding spot. It’s with hard-earned skill and speed that he grabs you and pulls you back into the shadows, away from the light that exposes his weakness. He ensnares you in the darkness with him before you can make a sound or register what’s happening.

With tender strength he holds you against his chest. His arm wraps around your waist perfectly, pinning your arms to your sides. It should be like this. You belong with him. He should always hold you. What does heaven have that lying with you, your head above his heart and his arms around you doesn’t provide? Your body fits against his like you were made for him. And lately he believes you were, just to make your fate that much crueler. To start his punishment long before he knew he’s going to be punished.

You can’t make a sound with his hand covering your mouth. He wishes you could. Blame him. Hate him. (Love him.) Your struggling is useless. He’s always been stronger than you. Could always easily pin you down. Why can’t you pout about it now? (Please hit his chest. Please call him mean. Please laugh and pull him down for a kiss.)

Your efforts double when the glint of the blade catches your eye. He has already messed up. He shouldn’t have held you one last time. It comes so naturally to him, though. Instincts can’t be overridden. He had to. He tries to make his voice deeper, unrecognizable. To his own ears he doesn’t sound like himself when he shushes you. You sound every bit like yourself when you whimper. (Can’t he hold you tighter? Can’t he pull the blanket over you like he’s always done and shield you from the rest of the world?)

In his memories, it’s always your hair, your cheeks that he caresses. Your lip under his thumb. As he moves his hand lower though, he discovers that the skin on the vulnerable column of your throat is surprisingly soft too. (Did he not explore your body enough? Will this be one more regret to haunt him day and night?) Your breathing, your heartbeat, he can feel it all with his touch. It’s so fast. Like the little bunny’s that you promised to adopt with him. The one you won’t make a half-orphan because you never brought it home. Your eyes look like prey animal’s caught in a trap too.

His thumb strokes over your windpipe. You deserve that. You deserve something more intimate. You deserve something warmer than the cold steel of the knife. You deserve him. Not a stranger.

But he can’t. He’s a coward. His strength isn’t as tender now. It’s desperate. He doesn’t want to let go. You don’t make a sound.

(Please whine. Please tell him to let go. Please call him clingy. Please tell him to let you hug him too.)

His hand stops before it can dip under your shirt. His fingertips barely brush against your collarbone. How selfish he can be. You must be so scared - a stranger holding you, a stranger touching you. Joshua knows if it was him you saw holding a knife so close to your face, you wouldn’t be scared at all. 

(Smile at him. See him.)

As if sensing his hesitation, you move. Just one lone, weak attempt to break free. Just a jolt of an animal that doesn’t wish to be pet.

He leans his head against yours. (Hurt him. Do it. Please.) You stay still. For a blink of an eye that lasts an eternity, you settle and relax. Like he’s holding you while you cook dinner. Like he’s comforting you after a long day. Like you’re watching the storm outside from the warmth of your home. Like he’s saying goodbye.

Like you know what’s coming.

It’s with an order, an impulse to his nerves that doesn’t, that can’t have, come from his own brain and free will that the knife in his sweaty palm turns. Your breathing picks up more. The blade presses against the side of your throat and he—

Joshua!

The shriek pierces the silence of the night.

It rains. Crimson splatters on the ground.

But all he hears is your voice.

Did you recognize him and called his name in shock? Betrayal? Understanding?

Were you calling him for help?

Did you want his name to be your last word?

The knife clatters on the ground with echoes of his name, of your voice. Nothing else is real.

His hand clutches your throat and presses against it with force. He’s trying to pull the split tissue together but it won’t listen and the blood keeps pouring.

The warmth encompassing his hands must be your hands grabbing his. Slipping your fingers between his.

You’re just standing in the shower. It’s hot water rolling down your bodies. You’ll laugh. You’ll scold him for simply holding you instead of washing up.

What’s the point if his hands are forever dyed red.

No shower will ever be enough.

And your life keeps trickling down his fingers and pooling under his feet.

He collapses with you.

His head falls, forehead resting against yours.

(Look at him.)

He holds you like you’re dancing. Your silly wish to look at him after he twirls you. To lean back into his arms and look up at him.

So look at him. 

There’s nothing interesting to see at the back of your skull.

He sobs, but he only hears your voice. Only feels the claws of guilt and pain tearing at his throat from the inside.

Did you know? Could you tell he held you? Did you know you’re not alone? That you don’t have to be scared? 

Look at him. 

Tell him.

The world did not end with a bang. Nor with a whimper. The world did not end at all that night.

But there, in a dark alley where blood pools on the cobblestone, a life and a soul were crushed to save it. 

[neriumquill]

Imagine if you will, that you have an older brother.

He's an admirable kind of brother, the same as your parents. He has an interest in the natural sciences and is a bit of a nerd, but he's a great brother. Alongside your older brother, of course you have your parents, a younger brother (who is practically an angel to everyone who has ever known him), a cousin who is sort of your sister (and also your brother's one true love or whatever), your older brother's lifelong best friend, and a servant girl who is practically family.

Life is easy. You live everyday with great pleasure in your native home where the icy-capped mountains are beautiful and the lake serene.

Of course, like any other human being, you experience a great tragedy. One day, your cousin-sister gets sick. In her kindness, your mother takes care of her but gets sick herself and dies. It's tragic... but it happens.

Afterwards, your older brother leaves for university, and you spend your life full of enjoyment. The only thing you wish is that your father would allow you to take leave and become a soldier. Unlike your older brother, you had no fondness for the academia and would rather go out and find glory in battle.

In this time, your older brother's letters begin to slowly dwindle, that almost two years have gone by since his last writing. It bothers you, but as you are just a youth, it doesn't bother you as much as it does your father, your cousin-sister, and your older brother's best friend (who eventually does leave to go to the same university as your older brother).

From your brother's best friend, you're informed that your brother has gotten ill, but at least his best friend is there to care for him. Gradually, your brother begins to write to your family again and all seems well.

One day, you go out with your family to enjoy the nature. You and younger brother go out into the forest to play hide and seek. You seek, but do not find. You return to your family, hoping your brother went back but he didn't. You and your family try to find him for the entire night.

In the morning, you find him murdered.

A part of you blames yourself. After all, you were the last to see him. Maybe you even proposed that game of hide and seek. Maybe if you hadn't lost him he'd still be alive. Your older brother is told to come back home, and while waiting for him, you find out that your family's servant (who your family has loved like their own) was the murderer.

It's all so strange and horrible, but her trial is set, and your older brother has come home. He is visibly shaken when you first meet him after many years apart. He's changed, but he's still your brother. He raves a bit to you about how he knows who the murderer is, but instead of the servant, he mentions some other fiend.

This thought is quickly swept away by the ensuing trial and execution of someone you once held dearly. Your older brother is so distraught. He has decided to stay home, but his misery is palpable and you feel sorry for him, your father, your cousin-sister, and yourself. Although, you try your best to be happy.

Months past, your older brother has returned from a trip to some neighboring cities. Your father has been casually mentioning the possible marriage between your older brother and your cousin-sister. Instead of agreeing immediately, as you thought he would, your older brother instead decides to go to England with his best friend. Which is really strange to you, but hopefully he comes back better.

A year nearly passes... your older brother's best friend is dead and your brother has been accused of his murder. Your father has to travel all the way to Ireland to save him. Eventually they return, and your brother is a wreck - though that's to be expected after the murder of his best friend. Still, he decides to go on with the marriage - and there is happiness in your household once again.

Though somehow, your ever unlucky brother sails away with his new wife... and comes back stating that she has been murdered. The news literally kills your father, leaving you and your brother alone.

The next few months are torture as you watch your brother turn into a shell of himself, further falling into the miseries that you have both suffered. However, somehow a part of you can tell that there's something deeper in his despair, though you can't exactly know what.

Then you hear from a magistrate about your older brother's ravings about that fiend... the murderer he'd once mentioned a long time ago. The talks of a madman.

Your older brother leaves, promising to kill whoever enemy he had conjured up in his mind.

He's gone for months... maybe even years.

He comes back dead, though not alone. His body escorted by a ship captain.

He has a tale to tell you.

Oh, btw, your name is Ernest Frankenstein.

[rita-repulsa-ke]

Next time

“She killed me!”

“She does that.”

“But—the ballad. The road!”

“All a lie, I’m afraid. A little trick she uses to lure people to their deaths. Like a beautiful siren on the rocks, singing to passing sailors.”

“Um.”

“Yes?”

“You’re staring at her.”

“Am I? I guess I am.”

“Can she see us?”

“No. She knows we’re here, though. She always knows.”

“I’d like to give her a piece of my mind.”

“I can pass on a message, if you want?”

“Tell her she’s a despicable, wicked creature who deserves to rot in Hell.”

“Ooh, very harsh. I like it. So. Are you ready?”

“…No. But I don’t get a choice, do I?”

“Nope. Sorry.”

“There was more I wanted to do.”

“There always is.”

“…What happens next?”

“Come and see.”

*****

“Hi, Ags. One of them says you’re a despicable, wicked creature who should rot in Hell.”

”How incredibly unoriginal. Which one?”

“….uh.”

“Wow. You can’t even remember, can you?”

“...Maybe that one?”

“That’s a little insulting to the souls of the dead, not being able to tell them apart.”

“I see a lot of them. And they generally all have something nasty to say about you.”

“And that does hurt my feelings so. I cry about it every night. But you know, at the end of the day, I’m alive and they’re dead, and knowing that gives me the strength to carry on.”

“…you’re funny.”

”Looks like I can still make Death laugh.”

“Agatha…”

“Hmm?”

“…you know.”

“You miss me, you love me, you’re obsessed with me, that sort of thing?”

“Yes, Agatha. That sort of thing.”

“Hey, Rio, want to know something?”

“Probably not?”

“I wish I had never met you. I wish I had walked away the first time I saw you and never looked back. If I could take back every time I told you I loved you, I would.”

“What, all six times?”

“And only half of them real.”

“…stop.”

”Oh, that one hit, didn’t it? You were always so easy to manipulate. Please, my love, please. I love you so. Anything like that, and you’d do whatever I asked.”

“Yes. Because I love you, Ags, beyond all reason, even when I wish I didn’t. You can make me regret it, though.”

“Not half so much as I regret ever having loved you.”

“You do still love me, you know. You’re angry and hurt and taking it out on me, but you—“

“I don't. You can stalk me and obsess over me and follow me to the ends of the earth, but that part of me died the moment I buried my boy in the ground. I don’t think I can love anything anymore.”

“Beloved…”

“But if I could, I can promise it will never be you.”

“…All right, Agatha.”

“…That’s it? All right? I mean, that one was really vicious. I've been working on it all morning. I was hoping for a better reaction."

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Crying or sulking or disappearing or something. …Not stabbing."

"I don't really know how to cry…Were you really working on it all morning? What incredibly cruel thing to say to me this time?"

"On and off. Around other things."

"…That's nice."

"What?! No, it isn't. It's the opposite of nice, that's the point."

"It's nice that you were thinking of me."

"...I honestly wonder what it's like to be you sometimes.”

"At the moment? Lonely."

"That wasn't meant as a question. But how can you be lonely? I'm right here."

"...you are very mean, beloved."

"Ah, there, that's better. More along the lines I was hoping for. Now shoo, I have other things to do, I'm a busy woman."

"Other things like what?"

"I'm sorry, are you under the impression that I'm going to share information with you, the being I hate most in the entire universe?"

"...Fine, Agatha. Have it your way."

"Wait!"

"Yes??"

"At least try to remember which one insulted me next time."

"...Really? That's what you—oh! Next time. Next...yes."

"Mmhmm. And I promise, eventually I will make you cry."

"I honestly don't think I can."

"Watch me."

"Always."

"...No, but really go away now."

"Yes, Agatha. Until next time."

"...See you then."

Want to read more witch fics? Here's a masterpost or go check out Death on Drums because I heard the 70s version of the ballad again and thought of it

[demonpiratehuntress]

anxious

Portgas D. Ace x F!Reader

summary - you're very anxious and prone to panic attacks, and your boyfriend seems to forget that after a bad mission.

warnings - a little bit of angst, mean and kind of toxic Ace, hurt/comfort, panic attack triggers (or at least they are for my anxiety, idk about you guys but a warning anyway)

You were just trying to be thoughtful.

You hadn't known his mission had gone so sour.

It was a harmless surprise, and you hadn't known that he felt so strongly about it.

"SURPRISE!"

His expression went from anger, to shock, and back to anger in the span of ten seconds as he realised what was happening. One look at the decorations and the cake confirmed it.

"(Name), what is this?" Ace's hard gaze turned on you.

You shrunk back a little ,not used to being on the receiving end of that look, "You never celebrate your birthday, so I wanted-"

"There's a reason I don't!" He raised his voice, making you flinch.

"I-I'm sorry-" You started, panic flooding your body. "I didn't-"

"Think? No, you didn't," he cut you off harshly. "If you were thinking, you would have asked me first!" Small flames flickered on several parts of his body as he stepped closer, glaring menacingly.

At the first sign of your body trembling, Marco stepped between the two of you, "Ace, stop."

You felt humiliated. The rest of the crew had seen everything, and your face burned with embarrassment. You shook slightly, the panic growing until you became unsteady and stumbled, catching yourself on the wall.

You turned and fled, hot tears streaming down your face.

You barely made it into the room before you couldn't take it anymore, your entire frame shaking so violently you couldn't keep your balance. You fell to your hands and knees, unable to breathe as you sobbed.

Someone came in behind you, and you made out a figure trying to help you up, but you couldn't tell who it was before you passed out.

-

You woke up in your bed, but with an empty spot beside you. You frowned deeply - Ace hadn't slept here with you last night. He was never that upset with you, he always craved your touch regardless.

You sat up slowly, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. You felt horrible, not just emotionally but physically too. Still, you got up to get ready.

Your first action was to find Marco, because if Ace hadn't come back last night then it must have been the doctor who put you in your bed. Which you were grateful for, but embarrassed about.

"(Name)! How are you feeling?" He offered you a warm smile when you eventually found him.

"Better," you admitted, "But..."

"I know. I'm sorry."

"It's not you who needs to apologise," you sighed. "But anyway, thank you for helping me last night. Have you seen Ace?" The moment you saw Marco's expression, your anxiety returned. "What?"

"(Name)..." He sighed. "I shouldn't tell you."

"Why?" But even as you asked, unease gnawed at you slowly and made you uncertain you wanted to know the answer.

Before Marco could answer, someone's shout from outside made you freeze up.

"Ace, there you are! Finally made it back from the bar? With all those pretty women that were surrounding you, we feared the worst!"

It was a harmless joke to the crewmate who'd spoken, but those words crushed whatever hope you were holding onto that you could talk to Ace about what happened.

Marco quickly went to close the door, "You can stay here if you'd prefer not to see him." He eyed your trembling hands, then added, "I think it would be best if I go talk to him."

All you could do was nod, before you had to force yourself to sit down. The anxiety you felt increased tenfold, making your head spin. The dizziness worsened, to the point that you felt as if you were going to faint again. You tried breathing in and out deeply, but that failed and the tears came before you could stop them.

How could one small issue, that could have been talked through rationally, cause this much hurt?

When you eventually ran out of tears and stopped shaking, you decided you'd had enough. Ignoring Marco's suggestion to stay there, you left his room and left the ship, going onto the island it was docked at.

Acting as if you didn't hear the confused calls and shouts of your concerned crewmates behind you.

A hand closed around your wrist before you could get too far, and without thinking you swivelled around and punched your assailant square in the nose.

Ace let go and stumbled back, a surprised and pained grunt leaving his lips as he covered his sore appendage, "I deserve that."

"What do you want?" You asked emotionlessly, arms crossed.

"To apologise," he looked up at you, guilt clear in his eyes. Hurt and panic joined it when he reached for you again but you flinched away from him. A first.

"For insulting me or for going to be with other girls on your birthday?" You snapped, crossing your arms.

His guilt worsened, "I...both."

"This is the worst apology I've ever heard."

"Look, I'm sorry," he pleaded, "I'm really, really sorry. You didn't make me upset, you never do. I was just...the mission went bad, and I barely got out of there and I was just so frustrated that I couldn't see or think straight. And I ended up hurting the person I love the most because of it." He stepped closer slowly, shoulders sagging in relief when you didn't move away. "I know it's not an excuse, and I feel so, so horrible for being the cause of a panic attack...But please let me make it up to you, I want to celebrate my birthday with you. You're the reason I want to celebrate it now. Please..."

The sincerity of his words and the pain in his eyes were enough to convince you that he was truly sorry. You sighed, finally letting your guard back down and taking his hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"I forgive you, just...don't do it again. If you do I will throw you into the ocean."

His eyes lit up and he engulfed you in the tightest of hugs, "Deal!"

He sucked up to you hard the following few days, doing anything and everything you asked. He knew the crew took advantage of that and asked you to tell him to do certain things, but he never protested because he knew he had a lot to make up for.

He brought you breakfast in bed, forcing himself to wake up earlier than he would usually just to get you food for when you woke up. He made the bed and cleaned the room, organised your clothes and attended to you every need.

Because the thing about Ace is that he cares deeply, and loves even deeper. If he hurts someone he loves more than anything, he doesn't forgive himself easily and he grovels, hard. Even if you've already forgiven him.

But that's what you loved most about him, his passion for and commitment to the ones he loves.

[satureja13]

The Boys are slowly trying to get back to normal on Great A'Tuin II after they found the creature. Vlad and Ji Ho are on their way back to their quarters to be fit for their next shift and Jack and Jeb will follow them soon. They are just doing some repairs for a few hours so their sleeping times don't overlap and they can return to a healthier schedule again. They thought about locking the creature up so he can't cause further damage, but since he's able to crack metal containers and seems quite peaceful after Jack repaired his friend, and he learned that the Boys are of no danger to him, they dumped this idea.

Ji Ho and Vlad just passed the 'meadow', when Skully played 'Push It' by Salt 'n' Pepa...

'Can't you hear the music pumping hard? Like I wish you would Now push it

Boy, you really got me going You got me so I don't know what I'm doing

Ah, push it Push-push-push-push it, push it'

Vlad gritted through is teeth: "I'm going to push Skully in the trash compactor one day..."

They are both so nervous to share a bed. This barely ever happened in all those years. (I only remember that night at Tartosa and one night in Tomarang after Ji Ho had been so drained from teleporting and he needed to be near Vlad. And after Vlad crashed Ji Ho and Caleb's wedding ^^' Oh, and after Ji Ho caught Vlad trying to bond with Morgan, omg!)

Vlad looked at the bed: "You can shower first." Does that - does that mean they are going to do it? Just like that?

Ji Ho hurried to the bathroom. Finally! They will sleep together in one bed and do all the things that lovers do!

The panels between the bathroom and their hobby room, where Vlad sat and tried to distract himself with writing, have openings - and Vlad could see Ji Ho in the reflection of his monitor... It was very hard for him to maintain his composure.

Ji Ho put on their Han and Leia shirt and looked at Vlad in anticipation. It will feel so good now that he has all his feelings back! Ji Ho remembered their incredible kiss in the ocean of Tartosa a few weeks ago - and blissfully shivered by the thought of how amazing it had felt. That kiss had shaken him to his very core. How would it feel to go all the way with Vlad? And even though they'd woohooed a few times before, this would be so different. But Ji Ho nervousness was still stronger than his desire. It's still so awkward between them.

Ji Ho sat on their bed - agitated - and waited for Vlad to take a shower and come to bed to him. Vlad looked very nervous too...

The Bond does not show them their exact thoughts, just how they feel. And so the Bond showed Vlad Ji Ho's inner turmoil. Eventually Vlad stood up and looked at him. Ji Ho caught his breath.

And then Vlad cursed under his breath and left... Ji Ho was stunned. What's that supposed to mean now? Does Vlad not want him? Was it too invasive to remove Vlad's bed without his consent?

Vlad went back to the engine room, to Jack. Jack: "What are you doing here?"

Vlad is too tired and exhausted to explain in a somewhat coherent way: "Ji Ho, he just looked at me. Into my soul. And I knew that I was wrong. I'm so sorry, Jack. I was just so upset you lied to me. But Ji Ho - I had to come to apologize. Thank you for what you did for him - for us." Jack: "Are you sleep walking? What are you even talking about?" Vlad: "About the shirts. Ji Ho made me realize that I was wrong." Jack was dazzled: "You are supposed to sleep to be ready for the next shift. Or at least hold him in your arms and do all the stuff you always wanted to - and Ji Ho said you were wrong and sends you back to apologize?"

Vlad: "Eh... he didn't actually say anything." Jack huffed a laugh: "You're wax in his hands, aren't you? Fine, apology accepted. Go back to him. Now. You're sleep deprived and takling nonsense. Or are you a bit afraid, hm?" Vlad: " What? No!"

On his way back, Vlad mulled over how much power Ji Ho has over him. Just one look and his anger is gone. He would go to hell and back for Ji Ho - all over again. Back at their quarters, Vlad held his breath at the beautiful sight. He would endure everything all over again if that would bring him here. To him.

Ji Ho is finally his. Vlad took a quick shower, put on his shirt and slid next to Ji Ho. Ji Ho wore his shirt all those years - for Vlad. He must have always believed in them. And even with all his feelings buried away, he must have loved Vlad. They will get there - at their own pace. And nothing's going to stop them now.

From the Beginning 🔱 Underwater Love 🔱 Latest

Current Chapter: starts ▶️ here Last Chapter: 'Here comes the Sun' from the beginning ▶️ here

📚 Previous Chapters: Chapters: 1-6 ~ 7-12 ~ 13-16 ~ 23-29

Outtakes

So excited - and nervous :3

[lillaydee]

One More Try

Landlord Joel Miller / Reader

They say a woman is tested when her man has nothing. But a man is tested when he has everything. What happens if you both passed the test, but your partners did not?

WARNINGS:

Unplanned Pregnancy, Soft Joel (The Last of Us), SO MUCH FLUFF, Joel Needs a Hug (The Last of Us), Alternate Universe - No Cordyceps Outbreak (The Last of Us), Protective Joel (The Last of Us), Joel is Bad at Feelings (The Last of Us), Hurt Joel (The Last of Us), Reader was pregnant before meeting Joel, Slow Burn, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Mentions of Miscarriage (Not OC), Landlord Joel, No Outbreak AU

SERIES MASTERLIST

---

You kicked the door closed, your hands letting go of the two large suitcases you had been wheeling up the five flights of stairs. You were soaked to the bones from the rain, your sneakered feet sore and squelchy from your very long walk. You took all your clothes off, glad for the warmth radiating from the heater in the small study room you had rented for your doctorate. You opened one of the suitcases, found that some of the clothing was not completely soaked and pulled on some dry ones. Small victories, you thought. You scanned the room, mentally calculating for spaces to hang your wet clothes, hoping some clothes will be dry enough for you to wear the next day.

After some strategic thinking and making do with what you had in the cramped space, you managed to get all the wet clothes hung one way or another. You sat on the single sofa at the corner of the room, feet propped up on the small coffee table the last candidate had kindly left you, wrapped the crocheted blanket around your body, and fell asleep.

A small shake woke you. Your supervisor Professor Frank Anthony’s worried face appeared in front of you. Relieve floods it when you responded. He gave you a bottle of water, and two pills. You are burning up, he says. What the hell happened? You cannot think. You just felt like shit that’s been dumped onto the highway and driven over again and again. When you didn’t answer, Frank searched for his phone, and called someone. You fell back asleep.

When you opened your eyes again, your fellow candidate and best friend Maria was in the room with Frank. Both looking at you like you might spontaneously combust. You felt better than you did, but you knew without a doubt that you still had a temperature. How could you not? You walked almost 10 miles in the rain, dragging two full suitcases behind you, needing the walk to clear your head. What happened? Frank asked again. An overwhelming feeling of helplessness overpowered you, and you broke down.

---

Maria was packing your stuff. You were going back home with her, she said. No, she will not take no for answer. But you couldn’t do that, she lived with her boyfriend in a studio apartment. Frank offered you a room at his house while you looked for a place, but you said you didn’t want to intrude. You were perfectly fine right there. You will finish this doctorate if it’s the last thing you did. You just needed to find a job, and a place to live. You’ll be fine.

You cried in Maria’s lap for hours that day. Frank came up to tell you he had started the process for you to be his research assistant, just so you can start over while you look for other jobs. You only had your dissertation to complete, he said. You could do this. Maria’s phone rang, and after a few minutes of talking, she came back with good news. Her boyfriend’s brother owned a building of short-term rental apartments just outside the university compounds, she said, and one was available for you if you moved in today. The rent was cheap, and it’s close to the university, which was perfect seeing as you no longer had a car.

You were desperate. You had a headache; you wanted to throw up, everything that had happened since yesterday evening was just bubbling up in your chest threatening to come out of your mouth. But this would mean one thing less for you to think about. You quickly agreed.

When Maria drove up to the apartment building, the two of you were greeted by her boyfriend Tommy. He hugged you tight, telling you how sorry he was, and that they will help you get through this. He helped you with your suitcases into the building, up the stairs to the first floor, and into the first door on the right. Apartment 1A. The door was wide open, a man inside with a basket of cleaning supplies and a mop bucket, finishing up on mopping the linoleum floor.

It’s a room. A bathroom immediately across from the door, next to the small built in double door closet, an open floor plan living/sleeping area that housed a queen-sized bed, a love seat and a coffee table, and an eat-in kitchen separated by a collapsible door. It’s a hell of a difference from the posh condo you were just living in yesterday, but at least you will have a roof over your head.

Maria helped you unpack while the other man continued doing some last-minute cleaning. Tommy had gone to get some food for the three of you. Silence and depression must have oozed from you, enough to make Maria stop unpacking and sit with you on the love seat, her hand holding yours. The two of you just sat there quietly, eyes on each other, Maria silently telling you she will be here for you no matter what.

The man broke the surprisingly comfortable silence. He told you the only window in the room was stuck, but he will be back the next day to fix it. Also, the laundry room was downstairs, just to the left of the mailboxes, and if you needed anything, he lived right below you, just knock on his door or call him, and he will help you out in any way he could. Maria looked at him disbelievingly, as if she couldn’t believe her ears.

You thank him, asking for his name. He gave you his card.

“Joel, Joel Miller.”

And he quickly left the room, avoiding Maria’s judgmental eyes. Miller, oh, this is Tommy’s brother, you think.

When Tommy returned, the three of you ate silently, the two of them not knowing what to say to you. Tommy was quietly seething, unable to believe the man you dedicated the last ten years of your life to would do this to you. Before he left, he told you to call him or Maria, or even Joel if you needed anything. But you remember, you no longer had a phone. He even took that away from you.

When Maria took you to get a new phone, your credit card was declined. Your account had been frozen. The clinic you went to for your fever told you your health insurance had been cancelled. You had to use the cash you had to pay for a new phone and decided that buying Tylenol was cheaper than getting checked up.

He had worked fast. You had not even been out of the house for 24 hours and he had taken every comfort you had away from you. You went to sleep that night with your pillows wet from your tears. Ten years. And he just pulled the rug out from under you.

---

You met Max when you were at the teacher’s training college. He was a barista at the café you frequented, his good looks and charm quickly capturing your attention. You were inseparable since then, and when you graduated, he moved with you to the small town you were teaching at. Work was scarce for him, so when he told you he wanted to go back to school and earn his degree in business management, you fully supported it. He went to school during the day, and bartended at night, while you took a waitressing job at the same place he worked at after school ended, and a bookstore during the weekends to make ends meet.

When he graduated, with well-paying jobs still being scarce in a small town, he persuaded you to move to a bigger city, where job prospects for him would be better. You moved to the city with him, where he quickly got a job at a small marketing company, his pay was not much and both of you had to take other jobs to make ends meet. You were still teaching at a school just on the edge of the city, doing your master’s degree part time. He fully supported your decision to further yourself, knowing that you have bigger dreams to teach at a university one day. You lived in a small one-bedroomed apartment, not much, but just enough for the two of you. Your life was going well, despite money being tight.

When the company he worked for went out of business, he told you that a couple of his coworkers were getting some money together to start their own company, some of the clients from their old job had already agreed to be their first clients. It was all a go, except he needed help with some seed money, he’s about ten thousand dollars short.

Your late mother had been a frugal woman, being a single mother had made her very careful with money, a trait she had passed down to you, along with her savings when she passed. You have the money, but it would wipe out your savings. Your conscience was telling you no, do not give him the money. Be careful! But you were in love. And he really was all you had left, so you gave it to him. Max was grateful, he worked hard, money was tight that first year, but things were looking up. His earnings increased, you both could afford to let go of your other jobs, and you managed to graduate with a master’s degree on time, with no loans to your name.

As time went by, his company started doing very well indeed. You expressed your desire to pursue your doctorate, and he was more than supportive. He suggested you become a full-time student, after all, you did support him when he needed you, so why not quit your job? He could easily support both of you. His income was now more than ten times yours anyway, you have access to the joint account, might as well go full on. Let him take care of you, please? So, you did. You enrolled at a university a little over ten miles from your new shiny luxurious condo and became a full time PhD candidate.

Max, being so busy with his company flourishing, was seldom home. He bought you nice things, took you on vacations, all in the name of thanking you for being there for him when he had nothing. But being raised in a humble home, you weren’t looking for luxuries, only his time and attention, which he promised you will have once things settle down a bit. Being home alone in a big condo that had a foyer bigger than your entire first apartment together was unnerving, so you rented a study room at the university, a small room where you could do your work comfortably, without distractions whenever Max told you he would be late coming home.

And that was where Frank found you this morning.

You had arrived home the night before to your two suitcases outside your door, Max and his smirking secretary Esther demanding you hand over your keys, jewelry and phone. You came to this house that HE bought with two suitcases of clothes, he said. You leave with them only. Leave everything he bought for you behind. You were blindsided. You did not see this coming. Despite him being busy, his attention to you had never wavered. He was the same loving man you met all those years ago. Sexually, he had never given you doubt that he was still attracted to you. So, you asked him, why?

He said he wanted wife material. Someone to wait for him at home, not someone who was so ambitious they couldn’t stop getting degree after degree. What was the point of spending the rest of his life with someone who could only think about furthering themselves and not giving themselves fully to him? He wanted a wife, a family, and Esther was willing to give him that, he said, while she smugly caressed her lower stomach.

Oh. Oh…

He had always said marriage can wait. Babies can wait. Let’s focus on the business and your studies first. Get yourselves sorted, and then we can talk marriage and family. But clearly, he just didn’t want them with you. You reminded him through tears that you had always been there for him, that you had helped build his business from the ground up. He smirked, went inside, came back out and tossed a wad of cash at you.

Ten thousand dollars.

And shut the door.

---

Joel was folding his laundry when you came in, your laundry just bunched in your hand instead of a basket, having only moved in with your suitcases. He rushed towards you with a spare basket, and you thanked him quietly, your face still pale and your body weak. You still had a temperature, but you just wanted to get yourself sorted. You did your laundry quietly, mentally calculating the amount of money you had, silently budgeting, trying to figure out how to stretch the amount unceremoniously thrown at you as much as you can. The RA position Frank had gotten you will help, but not much. By your calculation, you had another year at the most before your dissertation was completed, so you needed to figure out how to get by until then, so you can graduate on time.

You just felt so stupid. You let him handle everything, thinking that your love was strong enough, that you were a solid couple. You let him talk you into quitting your job. Into having a joint account that you no longer contributed to since you were no longer working. You stood there, leaning against the folding table in the laundry room, watching your laundry go round and round in the machine.

Joel watched you silently. He wondered what you were thinking about. He had been where you were, albeit the situation may have been different. He remembered the first few months after Laura pulled the rug from under him, how hopeless he had felt, how stupid, how meaningless life had been. If not for Tommy and Maria, he would have drowned at the bottom of a bottle long ago. He wanted to say something to you, to let you know everything will be alright, but it was not in his nature to speak to women he hardly knew, let alone one in your situation. He was a man of action, not one of many words.

He watched you as you looked at your laundry in the machine, eyes looking but not really. He knew you were not really there. He knew how impossible it was for someone in your situation to think about other things, no matter how hard you tried. He worried for you, which was not like him. He only knew your first name, rental agreements hadn’t even been signed yet, Tommy insisting all that can be taken care of later. Joel placed all his laundry in his basket before taking another glance in your direction.

You were not there.

He walked around the table, and saw you on the floor, passed out.

Joel didn’t hesitate, picking you up and taking you to his truck. He called Tommy on the way, driving the four miles to the university emergency room – why does this place have to be so huge???? When they asked him for her insurance information, he told them he would pay for the treatment, giving them your first name, placing his credit card on the counter. He waited nervously outside while they checked you out, filling in the situation to Tommy, Maria, Frank and his husband Bill when they got there.

The doctor came outside, calling for Joel. All of them stood up, Joel stepping forward to talk to the doctor.

“Your wife is fine, Mr. Miller. She is just dehydrated and has a slight temperature. She can leave in a little bit. You can go in to see her if you want, but first, congratulations Mr. Miller, you are going to be a father.”

---

You couldn’t process it. You were pregnant. How? You were on birth control. Just your luck to still get knocked up despite your efforts to be safe. And the father of your child had just dumped you for his secretary, who was also pregnant with his child. Shit, you should get tested. Who knows where else he’d been dipping his wick. And you need to get insured. Shit. You had no insurance. How much was this going to cost? And oh God, you’re going to have a baby. How much do babies cost? How much would the check-ups be? You still hadn’t paid the deposit and first and last month for your apartment. And now this too. Shit. Why did they take you to the ER? Did they call an ambulance?

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.

You couldn’t catch your breath. The machines started beeping. Shit, calm down. No, no, no, no, no… more procedures, more money down the drain. Money you didn’t have. You quickly pull the heart rate thingy off your finger. But the beeping didn’t stop. The wires on your chest. You ripped those off too. No. No unnecessary procedures. You knew what was wrong with you. But the nurses were there at the first warning of the machines, they pushed your shoulder onto the bed when you tried to get up. No. No, no, no, no, no. You saw the needle. Shit. How much would that cost you now? No. No!!!

Everything went dark.

When you opened your eyes, you were no longer in the treatment room in the ER. You were in a room, a ward, and it was dark outside. There was only one bed, there were still wires on you but none on your chest, thankfully. Just that blasted heart rate thingy pinching your forefinger. You pulled it off. Your throat felt so dry, despite the hanging IV bag that was uncomfortably connected to your hand. You needed to pee. You took a deep breath and forced yourself to sit up, your feet hanging off the bed. You stood up, one hand on the IV drip stand, took a step and immediately felt woozy.

A pair of warm hands suddenly appeared on your waist, steadying you. You turned around, your eyes meeting a pair of sleepy brown eyes that you had only seen a couple of times. His clothes crumpled, his hair tousled and his face showing evidence of uncomfortable sleep all over.

You took a step back from him, almost toppling over in the process, but he tightened his hold of you, one hand letting go of your waist and taking your arm instead. He told you not to freak out. It’s only him. His voice was rough from being awoken so suddenly, but you suddenly relaxed. Something about his voice was so calming to you, but you couldn’t put a finger on what it was.

Once you had steadied yourself, he let go of you. You went to the bathroom to relieve yourself, and when you came out, he was sitting in the chair to the left of the bed, which explained why you didn’t notice his presence. He helped you back to bed and gave you some water. You were so thirsty you drank three full glasses before you placed the glass down on the cabinet next to your bed.

“What happened? Why am I warded?”

“You had a panic attack. They had to sedate you, keep your overnight to make sure you’re alright.”

“I’m pregnant,” you said slowly, remembering what happened.

He nodded. You covered your face with your hands, tears falling so suddenly even you were surprised by its presence. Your knees came up to your chest, and you hugged them, rocking your body slightly, processing the realization. Joel got up to his feet, his hands twitching, as if he wanted to comfort you but didn’t know how. He let you cry. His eyes averted slightly, giving you some privacy, flicking back towards you every now and again to make sure you were alright. He finally settled back down when you wiped your face clean with your gown and took a deep breath.

“Why have you stayed here with me Joel?”

“They wouldn’t let Maria stay – she’s not family. And since I brought you in, they thought I was the father. Someone should stay with you, make sure you’re okay.”

Oh.

“It’s okay if you want to go, Joel. I’ll be alright. I’m not your responsibility. I’m sure you’ll be more comfortable sleeping in your own bed.”

“I’m already here,” he said with a shrug. “Are you going to tell him?”

“I don’t know.”

The two of you sat in comfortable silence for a while, before he told you to lie back down and get some rest, but not before he made you drink more water. When you woke up, Joel wasn’t there. The nurses were fussing over you, taking your blood pressure, checking your temperature, before a doctor came in with more nurses and some interns, an ultrasound machine wheeled in behind her.

“Good morning, Julia, I’m Dr Servopoulos, but you can call me Tess. I’m here to do your ultrasound. Would you be okay with my interns being here to learn?” she asked, a smile on her face.

You nodded. Tess pointed at one of the interns who began to read your patient history, when Joel came back in, a paper bag in one hand, a tray with two to go cups in the other. He stopped when he saw the crowd of doctors around your bed.

“Oh, I’ll wait outside,” he began retreating.

“Is he the father? If so, he can stay,” Tess said, looking at you.

You looked at Joel, remembering what he told you last night. You nodded. You offered him your hand. He didn’t hesitate, taking it after placing the bag and cups on the chair he spent the night in. You knew this was not appropriate. You had only known him for a couple of days. But you were really scared, you didn’t want to be alone for this. You will apologize to him later, you thought. But he didn’t seem to mind, sandwiching the hand you offered him between both of his. Why did this feel so right? His hands were warm, the comfort they brought spreading throughout your body, and suddenly you didn’t feel so scared anymore.

When Tess lifted your gown up to prepare for the ultrasound, Joel averted his eyes, he moved further up to stand beside your head, his hands still clasping yours. You looked up at him, your face scrunched slightly when an intern squirted cold gel on your belly before the fart-like sound of the almost empty bottle made you snicker like a child. The young lady was persistent, determined to get every last drop of gel from the bottle, making more and more fart noises, causing you to lose control and started laughing out loud. He lost it when you snorted, letting out a full belly laugh along with you, making you forget you didn’t know this man at all. The doctors couldn’t help but laugh along. Even Tess, who must have done this a million times, was wiping tears from her eyes.

When the tiny bean of a baby appeared on the screen, you stopped laughing.

“There’s your baby Mom, Dad,” Tess said, pointing at the screen.

You felt all your problems melt away. You had a baby in your belly, this was real. You were pregnant. You felt Joel’s hand tighten around yours, and you squeezed back without thinking.

“Looks like you are about seven to eight weeks along,” Tess continued. “Let’s see if we can hear the heartbeat.”

She clicked on some buttons and maneuvered the wand around a bit and the room was suddenly filled with the whoosh whooshing sounds of your baby’s heartbeat.

Your sight suddenly went blurry. Uncontrollable tears filling them to the brim. Despite the tears, you couldn’t help smiling. You couldn’t take your eyes off the screen. You were pulled from your haze when you felt a pair of whiskered lips touch your temple. You looked up at Joel, a wide smile on his face, his teary eyes glued to the screen, just like yours were.

After you were cleaned up, Tess talked to both of you about pre-natal care, telling you your due date, and setting up the next appointment. The whole time, Joel’s hand never left yours, and you were in no hurry to let go either. His presence was welcomed. He calmed you down, although you had no idea why.

After the doctors left, the two of you settled back down, Joel finally letting your hand go. He brought tea for you, and some pastries from the café downstairs. After he helped you eat your own provided breakfast, he put the cups and plates away, before sitting back down, and began apologizing to you.

“What are you apologizing for?”

“Getting carried away,” he said, his eyes on his own feet, referring to the kiss on your temple. “Thank you for letting me share that with you. It was a special time. I know you would’ve preferred to share that with the father and not some strange man you have just met,” he said quietly.

It was then that it hit you, you didn’t even think about Max throughout all that wonderful experience. It was as if your body and soul had accepted that you would be alone in this, even if you hadn’t decided if you were going to let him know about the baby yet. You assured him it was alright and thanked him in turn for being there for you. He didn’t need to, but he did, and you had a wonderful first check-up as a result.

Maria and Frank called, wanting to come by to check up on you, but you had already been discharged, so they agreed to come visit at the apartment instead. Joel took care of the bill and took you to your new home. He made a point to keep the bill out of your reach. When he cut the engine and ran out to open your door for you, you took the bill out of the console and quickly hid it under your shirt. You needed to pay him back. For your own peace of mind. When Frank and Bill and Tommy and Maria arrived, Joel left the five of you to talk. Only then did you open the envelope. The bill was over several pages, along with a copy of the ultrasound. You took it off the clip, and studied the bill.

Your heart skipped a beat at the amount displayed. For one night? Shit. What are you going to do?

Maria took the bill, looked at it and gave it to Tommy, who glanced at it before pocketing it. But they all knew what you were thinking. Bill, ever the no nonsense lawyer that he was, looked you straight in the eyes and asked you if you were going to call Max. He told you that it would be entirely up to you, of course, but they think you should, and see how it would go from there. If he agreed to take responsibility, at least you wouldn’t be burdened by the medical costs and anything else the baby needs alone – lord knows that man could afford it. But if he didn’t, then maybe that’ll just hammer down the reality of what an asshole he really was, and you could move on from there, with their help.

In your heart, you knew you wanted to tell him. He was the love of your life for ten years. This was the baby you two made together, with love. You may not have planned this, but the love was real, at least on your part. That night, you thought about what it would have been like to find out about the baby if you two were still together. Would he have been happy? Would he have hugged you and kissed you and cried tears of joy? One part of you would like to believe so, but your mind kept flashing back to the way he dumped you. Without warning. Cold. Smug. Uncaring. He didn’t even care that you wouldn’t have any way to contact an uber or a taxi, he didn’t care that it was raining and cold. It was as if the last ten years didn’t happen. And ten thousand dollars was all he thought you were worth after all those years you helped support him. And you couldn’t get the sneering look in his eyes when he tossed the money at you, like you meant nothing to him, not even yesterday’s garbage.

But Bill was right. He should know. It was his baby, after all. And even if you were heartbroken, you didn’t have the heart to keep a baby away from its father. So, if he decided to be in the baby’s life, you would let him.

So there you were, with Bill, Frank, Tommy, Maria and Joel by your side, standing in front of his condo entrance. The guards wouldn’t let you in, their faces apologetic, but they were only doing their jobs. When he drove up, Max got out of the car aggressively, asking you what you wanted. Didn’t he make himself clear? You were no longer welcome there. Behind him, Esther got out of the car, her face clearly annoyed that you were there.

“I’m pregnant, Max.”

He froze. “What?” His eyes searched your face and body, he took a tentative step towards you. “You’re pregnant?” a small smile graced his face.

For a moment, you thought he was going to hug you.

But his smile faltered, and his eyes turned cold again. “How do I even know that’s mine? Or that you’re not lying? You spend all day on campus. How do I know you haven’t been whoring around? How do I know you’re not just saying this to trap me?”

You couldn’t believe your ears. He’s the one who left you for someone else, but he’s accusing you of sleeping around? No. You can see Tommy and Joel taking a step towards you in your periphery, but a blurry figure got in front of you first, and a resounding smack hit your face.

Esther was screaming at you, calling you a gold digger. A scorned woman. A used up old bitch. Why couldn’t you just accept that he doesn’t want you anymore? Why would you break up a family? Let it go, bitch, let it go. He’s mine now. Go and hide among your books and let us live our lives in peace. How dare you try to take him away from me? As if you could ever. Look in the mirror, slut!

At this point, Maria pulled you away, walking you to her car. Joel, Tommy and Frank followed. Bill handed a stunned Max his card, telling him to contact his office when he made up his mind. Esther was still screaming. Throwing her shoe your way, calling you every name in the book. But you didn’t even hear her at this point, Max’s accusatory words lingering in your ears.

Bill came to see you in your study room a week later, an envelope in his hands. Max had contacted his office. He enclosed a cheque with enough money to pay for your studies, health insurance and rent for a whole year, which would be enough for you to get back on your feet, under the condition that you sign a document relinquishing him of all his fatherly commitments to the baby you were carrying forever.

You didn’t even blink when you signed the document, despite Bill and Frank’s protests. Were you proud that you took his money? No. But he had hurt you so much at this point, you just wanted to be rid of him. Why worry for someone who didn’t want you anymore? Your mother raised you alone. You could do it too. You had a life to start living again, a doctorate to finish, and a baby to grow and eventually, raise.

Alone.

Part 2

[yukisloser]

how to fix arcane season 2:

tl;dr focus on Jinx, Vi, Caitlyn as A plot and Mel, Jayce, Viktor as B plot.

that's it ✅✅✅

(okay,, further elaboration & spoilers ahead:)

1: Mel, hextech, Jayvik, magic

draw Mel into the conflict with Jayce and Viktor. GET RID OF THE BLACK ROSE. ENTIRELY. why put Mel in with Jayvik? Mel was the CATALYST for hextech being created!! Jayce and Viktor were the ones who came up with it, but Mel is the one who allowed them to and supported it and made it a KEY part of Piltover!! as much as i loved jayvik moments somewhat, she DESERVED to be part of the hextech/hexcore/arcane plot 100%

2. Jinx, Isha, Sevika, Zaun

show Jinx finding peace away from the conflict through both Isha and her community. with Isha i feel that Jinx's symptoms could have flared up again (cuz where did they all go?? Silco's death made her ACCEPT she's Jinx, that's pretty extreme - ) and maybe she would ask Sevika to take Isha away or something and get someone else to adopt her. of course Isha being loyal would perhaps try to come back and she could eventually be the bridge forming between Jinx and the rest of Zaun (a sense of community which was HINTED in the Stillwater breakout, where Jinx finally felt the comfort of being accepted by a community which was THANKFUL to her - a feeling that was clearly new and slightly scary for her)

3. Caitlyn, Ambessa, Piltover

actually redeem Caitlyn: like seriously? wtf? no more notes.

4. Vi, enforcers, Powder

Vi. oh my sweet baby Vi. perhaps we should just rewrite everything for her this season. okay but seriously, they 100% needed to focus more on her unwillingness to accept that her sister has changed. "Powder" is not a person she can bring back by yelling old names as she tried to do in the season one finale - which only ended up traumatizing Jinx more. Vi needs to accept that Powder is someone she left, and CANNOT return to. she NEEDS to truly reckon with the fact that the years kept passing for everyone she knew even while she was stagnating in prison, and try to understand what Jinx has gone through. I think her arc of calling her sister "dead" and branding Jinx as her killer is GOOD, but it should have developed more from there.

[thcophagy]

laid out across the backseat of his car, caressing her curves and smiling impishly at him, lana looked just like one of the models in those old dirty magazines that sully kept hidden under his bed as a teenager. he should've known better than to fall for such overt seduction techniques but he wasn't thinking clearly, all that mattered in that moment was distracting himself from the guilt that was to inevitably come and instead touching lana like he'd been fantasying about for weeks upon weeks. there wasn't a lot of space to fit the both of them across the seats, especially not with what she seemed to have in mind but they could make it work, they had to as there wasn't any other options. with the object of his desires splayed out in front of him, sully was suddenly hit with the realisation that he didn't know what to do. he wasn't some teenage boy who had never known the touch of a woman before, he was a married man with children and a whole youth behind him filled with exploits, yet in that moment any of that experience might as well have been forgotten. he stared at her cunt with reverence, like it was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. "christ." he muttered under his breath as he watched her spread herself open, her pretty pink folds glimmering with the evidence of her arousal and causing sully's mouth to water with the desire to lean down and taste her. he didn't though, he didn't move an inch. the hands that had helped roll up her dress rested on her waist, a touch so soft it was almost like it wasn't there at all. in response to her question, all he could do was nod, his eyes still fixated between her legs till he forced himself to look up and meet her gaze. "lana, i don't..." don't want this? don't know what to do? a million different versions of the end of that sentence flittered through his mind but he decided it was better left unfinished, allowing her to decide how to best respond. after all, she was the one who seemed to know what he needed, despite everything else about them that should've had him being the one in control, he was at the mercy of whatever she deemed was appropriate. he couldn't sit there forever, just staring at her body in awe. eventually, his hands twitched back to life and he slowly slid one down from her waist, settling on her thigh which he squeezed gently between his calloused fingers. her skin was impossibly soft, smooth as silk and like temptation itself. after a couple seconds squishing the meat of thigh, sully could no longer keep himself frozen in anticipation of what to do and relented. he hunched over her lower half and pressed his nose into that soft crease where her thigh and groin connected and took a long inhale, all while he continued to knead at her supple flesh like it were dough. it was hard to tell whether she smelt so good inherently or if it was because it'd been too long since he'd gotten to bury his face into a woman and indulge in such basic things as her scent but either way, it was bringing something feral out within him, a need to eat her whole. "you're beautiful." he mumbled once again after pulling his face back, just enough so he could turn and press a kiss to her wrist before gently moving back up. his wife was still asleep at home, completely unaware what was going on between her husband and nanny but that didn't mean sully didn't feel the pressure of the clock, they didn't have an infinite amount of time and they'd already spent a lot of it bickering over whether or not he was going to give in, he wanted to spend the rest of the night buried between her thighs till his entire face was soaked with the proof of her arousal but it wasn't possible. once he started, sully knew he wouldn't be able to stop and so he held himself back, instead choosing to replace lana's hand with his own, slipping two fingers through her glossy folds before tucking inside of her after a couple of leisurely passes.

whatever problems would arise in the morning were none of lana's concern— not as she finally had him eating out of the palm of her hand. though she may have appeared reckless and hedonistic, there was a great deal of rationality that went into the important decisions she made. unlike some people, she didn't have a safety net in the form of her family's money to fall back on, and it took a great deal of skill and planning to get by in the world on her own. because of that independence, she was forced to grow up fast, learning how to do whatever it took to make ends meet, but at the end of the day, she was still young. she didn't know it all like she thought she did, and sometimes she was wrong. while she truly believed she had thought things through and that no real harm would come from seducing sully, people were unpredictable, and there was always a chance she could be wrong and put her whole source of income and housing in jeopardy. she didn't even have the capacity to be influenced by such worries, though, far too uninhibited by her substance intake to even give voice to consequence. seeing such a formidable man— the family patriarch, respected at work, a pillar in his community—reduced to this shuddering state of speechlessness from merely a few flicks of her wrist was an instant rush of power, and it inevitably went straight to her head, making her feel as though she could get away with absolutely anything. he was so eager, so desperate for more attention, it almost made her feel guilty for withdrawing her attention, though what she had in mind for him was so much better than a handjob. if he had the balls to accept her brazen offer, of course. it was still up in the air as to how he would ultimately respond once she crawled into the backseat—receiving a coerced handjob while still all buckled up in the driver's seat was one thing, but willingly following her to a more spacious part of the car in order to properly consummate the affair was inexcusable, a damning admission of guilt mr. landry couldn't hope to hide from. finally, lana began to feel a shred of worry. the pause he took was too long for comfort, and the expression on his face when he glanced back at her was hard to read. she was about to call out for him again when he finally opened his car door, and she immediately breathed a sigh of relief instead. it only took a moment or two for him to open the door to the backseat, flashing him her pearly whites in another dazzling grin as she shifted her body into a more seductive pose, hands suggestively caressing up her body and emphasizing her subtle curves. much to her satisfaction, he wasted no time in bunching up the fabric of her dress, aiding him in pushing up from the hem until it was practically bunched up around her ribcage. his eyes went directly for her exposed cunt, and lana couldn't say she was surprised, spreading her legs and following suit by running two fingers through her folds and using them to spread herself apart to give him a better view. hopefully there was enough illumination from the street lamps for him to see the way it glistened, allowing her to confess just how badly she wanted him without having to actually say it out loud. though he hadn't touched her yet, she already felt short of breath. just looking at him while he stared straight at her pussy was akin to foreplay, her head cocked to the side curiously as she propped herself up on her elbows slightly. "it's pretty, huh?"

[mintmatcha]

Does your f/o like the strip club yes or no?

[seventh-district]

it’s finally getting cold enough that i can bring my cardigan collection back into rotation without feeling like i’m gonna melt into a puddle the second i step outside!!!

[superas1an]

thank you for putting a name to the exact thing i’m writing out right now. bless you and all those you love and cherish. now to go back to writing a heart breaking story about clint and ali…

People should make more doomed by narratives siblings relationship.

Like with lovers you can just sever it and not have it related to you ever again but with siblings how could you?

You grow up with them you raise them or they raised you you both know how unforgiving the world is to both of you? You would die for them but will hate them for doing the same and yet none of you would regret it and both of you know it. They could be the person you loath the most and miss the most cause you still remember how they sneaked a candy into your hands. You can sever the tie but you can never look away at what you've lost, at whom you've lost because fate doesn't allow you to be together, eating dinners in quiet peace, if only there's another life, another time, where i can make you another plate of pancakes i would im sorry im sorry im sorry —