#the fear of it being ooc lmao
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If I knew how to write I would write about Amy and the fear that even if your friends say they forgive you for their mistakes they may actually still be bothered by it. And the simultaneous fear of accidnetly hurting a friend again and the want to avoid / ran away to avoid hurting them VS the fear that they wouldn’t care enough about you to ever reach out again so you Need to be the one to reach out or you’ll just be alone.
Also how Sonic is who connects her to the rest of her friends other than maybe Cream and Big. How if her and Sonic stopped being friends she’d likely lose all her other friendships too since people would choose Sonic over her (in her eyes.)
(Side note I think that’s also one aspect of why Metamy is interesting to me. Metal would choose Amy over Sonic. Metal Hates Sonic. Metal could be one of the only people Amy would trust to still spend time with her if Sonic stopped liking her.)
I think Amy can be afraid of being left behind and sensitive to rejection and also have way too much trouble trusting that her friends Actually like spending time with her.
#amy rose#sonic the hedgehog#Amy rose angst#Ig lmao#sth#*squeaks at you*#I think Amy deserves to have her friends do nice things that prove they care for her#I feel like in fanfics she is always planning parties for everyone#I’m glad that in Murder of Sonic everyone comes and helps her celebrate her special day just for her smile#I’m glad Amy is being less clingy over Sonic and she’s starting to be given actual hobbies and other things to focus on#but I want more evidence that Sonic cares about Amy perhaps…#not in a romantic way sorry Sonamy isnt what I mean at all#just like completely platonically#I just want Amy to feel loved is that too much to ask#sorey if this is ooc or makes no sense OOPS#me when I project my own feelings and fears onto Amy Rose
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i have been sort of at war with myself about how tlovm is going to affect how i write percy & in short... i don't think it is going to change much. i really, really, really love the way season 3 went but i think i am going to stick to a mostly campaign-centered portrayal. i'll cherry pick what i like from the show but ultimately i think i like how things were handled in campaign a little more.
#ooc.#it only took me 4 months to fucking make a decision abt this lmao#i only think in virgo i fear#buttttttt like#idk i loved how they reimagined glintshore#i reallyyyy loved the hallucinations from the party tbh / percy & ripleys dynamic & one on one interactions#but ultimately i think i love the in game portrayal of glintshore more???#also it was DEVASTATING for percy not to be there during the thordak fight which it was meant to be but#IDK IDK IDK#im just gonna stick w the campaign centric stuff w tlovm sprinkled in i love the sense of urgency in it all#i feel like in writing it's just gonna be more fun for me#that being said i will still have a side verse for people who ONLY know the show bcs i dont hate it i still love it a lot#but i will default to campaign based interactions
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okay! finally making this an official post: if you want my "new" discord, please either A. like this post, or B. DM me. either way, i'll DM you the name. it's not some secret or anything ( it's identical to my personal blog's url lmao ) but y'know. just not posting publicly this time
#☽—— ⸢ ooc ⸥#ok things to consider. first: i am. v bad. at messaging ppl first. no matter what anyone says my brain fears being annoying#i know it's silly and i'm going to try to Work On That but y'know. bear with me lmao.#second: i tend to mostly reply when at my laptop and not via mobile. there are exceptions to this but take this into account#third: while i'm going to try to be better with socializing this time around i DO have depression + anxiety + social anxiety + ADHD#i have real bad brain days so don't take me posting ooc here but not on discord badly LMAO i am not ignoring ppl on purpose#lastly: this is open to any mutuals so long as we've like. written together at least once. we don't have to have spoken ooc.#i'm down for chatting or plotting or screaming abt our faves <3
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Don't ever let me get comfortable sharing thoughts and ideas with you else you'll wake up to a wall of text about my thoughts and ideas for 0 reason other than I Can
#( scene missing ) ⸻ ooc.#i say this but generally i do not share#i play DND and my DM has to DRAG info outta me bc i struggle to share in case it's annoying or. bad.#i don't wanna share bad ideas :( so I'm just there like. quietly vibing unless I'm manic posting on social media i guess#i definitely did not develop a fear of not being enough bc of an old friend of mine being Too Good no sir#but yeah i guess generally you guys are safe from my ramblings in DMs at least LMAO enjoy shitposting instead
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I think this year I want to focus on getting back into RP but also just writing in general. FFXIV Write was such a challenge this year and I really think it's because I wasn't really writing before then! There was no training. No practice. Of course it felt like I pulled muscles.
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do you guys remember when Saitama was City Z's local cryptic horror becuz he kept leaving drastic destruction behind after killing monsters and no one knew anything abt him
#IT'S SO ???? I LIKED THAT LMAO#genuinely enjoy it when ppl get a little terrified of saitama despite all the goodness#i thought that appeal would be gone after city z was destroyed & saitama was forced into a more public place but omg.#now the association and BLAST recognize him as Something Deeply Wrong#and idc abt blast lmao BUT IT'S THERE!!! THAT SEED OF FEAR & MISTRUST!!!!! becuz it's v hard to not fear the unknown and Saitama is#such an enigma to them#“ A BEING LIKE THAT SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED TO ROAM FREE ”#love all the dehumanization of someone so desperate to be human. go on make him feel even more alien im HERE FOR IT. IM EATING THIS SHIT UP#𝐏𝐄𝐀𝐂𝐇 ; ooc.
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i feel like it’s time for my regular reminder that michael is afraid of bees
#i just think that i need to say this again. i think it’s important JDKSHDKD#the fears list in his bio being all serious AND THEN THERES THIS#i think he needed a silly fear that can be exploited just for the sake of silliness i think it’s fun DJDJHF#he gets so desensitized to the animatronics but GOD FUCKING FORBID a bee shows up in the office#his name is michael with a b and he’s been afraid of insects his whole life…#whoever didn’t know this well now you do enjoy your weapon LMAO#⁂ ・゚: i was looking for a job‚ and then i found a job‚ and heaven knows i’m miserable now ➛ ooc
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If Viv for some reason actually makes Lilith a villain/bad mom, I am ignoring it.
#(( we won't know for 2+ years I'm sure ))#(( I really doubt Lilith is going to be. Too much doesn't line up.#along with the little bits of lore from before the series was actually made when pilot was all we had#but if that becomes the case that is getting iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiignored. ))#(( mother of demons is mother. ))#[ ooc. ]#tbd.#(( this fear has been living in me pre-dating the series airing and it just got a little amplified with the finale lmao ))#(( i offhandedly whined to my gf with worries of lilith being made a villain. we both went 'oh no' at the end of ep8 sakasdf ))#(( viv and her mom character history is. concerning. ))#(( *praying* it doesn't carry on to hh. ))
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Leondas curling up in his cell as much as he possibly can, trying desperately to hide from his captors despite being fully vulnerable. His fear overwhelming him until he breaks out into sobs, begging them not to hurt him again. Strangely enough, behaving more human than he ever has in his moment of raw terror.
#{ I’m realizing that Leo’s actions are driven by both hatred and fear }#{ jealousy too but we’ll get to that lmao }#{ but he is truly terrified of being tortured the way he was centuries ago }#{ it scarred him both physically and mentally }#||❧ нανє уσυ нєαя∂ σƒ тнє нιgн єℓνєѕ? ;; ooc ☙||
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you know what i've never written but would love: ppl seeing through his act, recognizing his shitty treatment of michael, and calling him out on it
#—— ✧ ooc »#bonus if it's sb close to him/mike/both of them#anyway like he's not gonna change and he's not gonna admit to it either#like he will absolutely gaslight the fuck out of your muse and deny deny deny over this#for like 3000 reasons#thinks mike deserves his complete emotional disregard for him#truly has convinced himself that he isn't 'that bad' toward mike#subconsciously aware of his own guilt in the matter but literally incapable of processing that until like#his complete breakdown after elizabeth's death#( not to imply he doesn't blame mike AT ALL after that but like. finally hits the obvious 'i could've done xyz' point )#anyway i think his massive ego completely deteriorating along with his mental health after elizabeth is like#interesting to explore#like i need to be clear: he's inarguably worse after her death but it comes in. many shades lmao#him recognizing his failures is almost a bad thing tbh SHFKDSHFALD#sorry laughing abt 'massive ego' because it's not wrong but also how much of said ego is an act#how much of that ego is his perfect little persona and Not Him#how much of an ego can you have when you spend all your time stamping out your flaws in fear of being imperfect#is it ego or is it fear that others will see his flaws if he isn't cocky and Clearly Superior#yeah so i fucking hate him i love him we're getting married on wednesday and divorced on thursday#also fucking SIGH ->#˖ ✧ headcanon » ( the demon to his demons )
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so i know i asked you all if i should post about the ending but in the end I COULDN'T HELP MYSELF, I'M SORRY, tr ending discussion under the cut
as a summary of my previous thoughts on the ending... my number one problem with it has always been the lack of an explanation for how mikey/takemichi managed to leap back in time together. to me, this makes it seem like they just got lucky that the leap worked at all, which ruins the theme of "you shouldn't take on your burdens alone/rely on your friends a little."
the reason it ruins it is because it comes across as like... mikey was right to push everyone away, because when he finally gave into his impulses and trusted takemichi like he told him to, he LITERALLY KILLED TAKEMICHI. and it was seemingly just luck that they both managed to go back??
i have, however, had thoughts since then which make the ending work a bit more for me personally. mostly, that the reason the curse was broken/they were able to go back was still ultimately a direct result of mikey deciding to trust takemichi/breaking the mindset of "i have to take everything on alone." specifically, in part because he trusted takemichi to save him and "gave into" the dark impulses, but mostly because in the moment takemichi was dying, he begged him to come back. basically he was asking takemichi for help; asking him to prove his beliefs right - that mikey should and can rely on others, and that it's okay to do so. basically i'm trying to help the ending to make thematic sense (to me), is the idea.
now... that's interpretation of the final leap is kind of a stretch. and not really stated or implied in canon, unfortunately. BUT i do think there's some symbolism to support it, like the heavy emphasis placed on mikey's tears that are implied to play a reason in why the leap worked (at least that's what it looked like to me??). mikey has been set up as a character who believes that crying is weakness, so seeing him openly cry represents the shedding of that belief/being willing to ask for help.
but anyway i've said all this before, so what are my new thoughts? well, not much tbh WHOOPS but in the past, i interpreted the dark impulses as being a result of not the curse on shinichiro/karma directly - the punishment for THAT was shinichiro's death at kazutora's hands. instead, mikey's DI are more a circumstantial result of him having been dead in the previous timeline.
and also in the past, i said that the DI appear due to his desire to not rely on others, and are therefore broken when he admits he needs help. i still hold to that, but now i also really like the idea of like... they also come about as a result of him believing he doesn't deserve to be saved, & that he can't be saved?? and therefore it's not just him admitting he needs help that breaks the curse - but also him admitting that he wants to be saved at all. maybe even coming to believe that he deserves it, or at least that he wants a future with everyone.
after all, he DID technically manage to save everyone (but himself) in the bonten timeline. it's not just that he needs help because he can't save everyone by himself. it's also that he needs help so that he can save himself, too, and that he deserves to be a part of that happy future he created for everyone as well.
does that... make sense?? at all?? lmao i feel like it's a meaningful distinction a bit, but idk if i phrased it in a way that makes that clear or that is indeed coherent at all. regardless though. those are my ending headcanons. but god i wish wakui implied all this a little more than what we got KSJFHDSKF
#ooc#headcanons.#ending talk.#but also!! it's not just takemichi who saved mikey! everyone else did too!#without relying on the whole of the new tokyo manji gang takemichi wouldn't have been able to do what he did.#similarly#mikey did manage to protect everyone! he's not as weak/powerless as he might fear he is. BUT.#being protected alone isn't what would make everyone happy. to save EVERYONE; he needed to rely on others.#to save himself; he couldn't bear everyone's burdens alone. only by admitting he needed help could everyone be saved in the end.#...i'll admit i'm biased in that i like to emphasise how mikey did still manage to protect everyone in the bonten timeline#because otherwise his lack of agency / the feeling that he never got to achieve anything just makes me so damn sad#but yeah!! the message is “rely on your friends.” both because you CAN'T take everything on alone.#but also because you DESERVE to have help too!! etc.#i've said my piece i'm so sorry i literally cannot help myself#apologies for mostly just repeating what i've already said in other posts. lmao
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Rambles from Discord-
Thinking about the thoughts of Sol being deified again.
Kinda like in Madoka Magica and how Madoka becomes a god because of how she's tangled up in so many timelines Sol is in a very similar situation.
Being an Origin soul, Solita is tied to basically any other version of herself in the multiverse already, on top of that, dying and picking up new souls and creating an UP-level balloon cloud of souls doesn't help the situation
Solita still technically being alive makes her an anomaly. An Origin soul existing outside of an Origin world makes her a singularity. She's already technically got the power to rival most other gods, it's just she doesn't have the outlet for that and Deity keeps her at enough of a controlled burn that she doesn't just instantly blow up
I'm thinking about her potential for achieving actual godhood in her Abandoned verse when there's nobody to keep her in check. It's just a route that can go either way. Since Solita's human body can be a bit fragile and may start breaking down and basically killing her from the inside out, all the potential could end up eating her alive.
Maybe that's why she's even alive in her Abandoned verse? Like she unintentionally develops a different form of immortality without Deity there.
Or, do you think it would be better or worse for Deity to make Sol immortal before dumping her off somewhere? Instead of just letting her die, they literally refuse to allow her to so she can find a new life Really leaning into the fact of how far removed Deity really is from the mentality of normal people. And also as a science experiment, given how much Sol already was
Also the idea of maybe Deity became too attached to Sol and therefore couldn't just let her go like that? Instead of what would have been the opposite, Deity wasn't able to show her pity and didn't even give her dignity in death. And it's a bad end because of their attachment, rather than the lack thereof.
I do not make easy situations and questions for Sol ever.
#Fawn Speaks || OOC#me chewing on this girl so hard rn#also spoilers for madoka magica#i know the series is like a decade old and all but LMAO#spoilers tw#but I'm having thoghts about WHY abandoned sol is a bad end beyond Sol's worst fear being true#It's also Deity never coming to truly view Sol as a person?#Her true end Solita is given the comfort of death because Deity comes to sympathize for Solita. Bad end they don't. They dont understand wh#They never come to really understand Solita but gain an attachment that makes them unwilling to allow her to die#But i guess its a bad end with a tinge of hope given how Solita still has a chance to properly bloom somehow#Its just going to take a while
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i'm going to (re)write some dossiers later, buuuut the tldr is: I'm leaving V as Liz's biological child behind me, instead this is what Liz hints at to obscure the Truth (V is Betty Hanscombe's, a former lover of Liz's who got institutionalized in immediately post WWII lavender-scare America)
#ty wendy for being my sounding board and enabler lmao#ive spent a bit thinking about the specific time in which her and carolyn's births take place#how the psyche shifted to prioritize the return of The Nuclear Family; the home; property and capital#and scrubbing out the financially independent homosocial (and sometimes gay) women of wwii#to protect against the fear of communism and anti-capitalist insurgents who wanted to see america's wealth fall (re: burke devlin)#how that era aligns with elizabeth's ascendancy to family matriarch; head of household and the business (making these her priorities#instead of pleasure)#ooc.#and also liz's tendency to hide skeletons in the closet with more skeletons.#what's the worse secret for a 20th century matriarch in small town old money maine?#an affair with a man after your husband skips out on you? leaving you with an illegitimate child that you did *not* abort#or the love for a woman and her child that you might have raised as your own if things had been different.
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ive picked up old gods of appalachia again and hehwjfjrkek
#(ooc: i'm an unspeakable of the oscar wilde sort)#the brainrot is gonna return#also i really think i like old gods slightly more than tma#but thats bc i like the feel of it more lmAO#being from the south and around appalachia....Can Relate to the Fear of the mountains
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((Every day I live with the knowledge that a friend of mine continues to hold the torch that one day, someday, they'll get Ko/rb to sing a song for me.))
#;;ooc: mun muttering#I live in delight and fear tyvm lololol#unfortunately for me Michelle also knows of this; fortunately for me I'm safe(?) because that man doesn't have a c/ameo lol#yeah I'm blasting the entire P/yre ost shut up#obviously I'd die and yada yada; at least he's noticed us being goobers on twitter back in the day lmao
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could i request a small fic/imagine where tommy is soft with only his girlfriend/fiancé/wife and his kids?🫶🏼
Scary? My God you're divine!
A/N: hey babes, this is actually longer than I was expecting lmao. It still is under 1000 though. I am a huge sucker for soft!Tommy so thank you so much for this request 😍. I named the baby Charlotte before I realised how much her full name sucks and then couldn't be arsed to change it, so apologies to Charlotte Shelby. This is probably also ooc but I don't give a shit, but I hope you like it anon!!! 💕💕
You knew what Tommy did, what came with his job. All the illegal affairs and cutting people up. You'd be a fool not to. But you couldn't help but feel as if the real Tommy Shelby was the one who came out when he was with you.
Ever since the start of your relationship, Tommy had always acted differently around you, much softer, always there to place a soothing hand on your back or hunch over to talk to you with his lips brushing your ear, his words meant for no ears but your own. His hardened gaze softened and the corners of his mouth would quirk up in a a miniscule smile, only momentarily but you would count that as a win no less.
Arthur had employed you to help run things at the garrison, you weren't exactly excellent at maths but you were certainly better than Arthur so you would help with the books as well as working as a barmaid. The two of you met for the first time when Tommy burst into the office of the garrison with a cut on his sharp cheekbone, he thought he would be opening the door to his brother, you thought he was the most handsome man you had ever seen. You insisted on helping and sanitising the "wound" and although he initially refused he soon gave in to your worried frown and relentless offer of help. The two of you had been practically inseparable since, rarely seeing one without the other and if one was missing they were never very far behind.
Tommy took to you almost immediately after meeting you, and Polly clocked him the very next day. The woman always was good at reading Tommy and that day was no different.
Over the next couple of months, whenever he was around Tommy barely let you lift a finger, always eager to help lift things and assist in anyway possible, never letting you out yourself in any risk whatsoever, no matter how small. At first you were offended, thinking that he was doing it because he thought you incapable, what with you being a woman, or if he didn't trust you enough to do things on your own. But when you brought it up one day, thoroughly fed up, he was quick to quell your suspicions and doubts by instead admitting his growing feelings towards you. Absolutely zero persuasion was needed for you to agree to a date with the handsome Tommy Shelby, and now three years later you're married with an adorable little four month old baby girl named Charlotte.
Tommy often refers to your small family as his greatest weakness, saying that if it ever gets out how soft he is that his reputation would never recover. But you just laugh to yourself and cuddle in closer, hand coming up to stroke Charlotte's head. No one would believe it if it got out, he has nothing to worry about.
The first time Tommy had held her you would've thought she was made out of cheap glass, fragile and likely to break at even the smallest of mishandlings. You knew from the moment that little Charlotte Shelby first opened her eyes, sharp and blue like her fathers, that she had Birmingham's most feared gangster wrapped around her teeny tiny pinky. Once the doctor had shown him how to hold the baby properly, supporting her head and all that, it was hard to separate the two.
Every night when he came home to you he would lie in the centre of the bed with you curled up into his side, head resting on his firm shoulder, and he would place the small babe to lie on his bare chest, small legs tucking up in a scrunch like a frog and cute babbles making the corners of his eyes crease.
#tommy shelby x reader#thomas shelby x reader#tommy shelby#thomas shelby#peaky blinders x reader#peaky blinder fanfic#peaky blinders#peaky blinder imagine#tommy shelby imagine#tommy shelby fanfic#peaky blinders fic
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