#the fact that this whole entire thing is me going 'what would jess write about' and it's not Me Jess but Other Jess

[xerith-42]

Some Slightly More Coherent Thoughts about Void Paradox

Riveting title, I know, but this is the quality content I'm sure... 50 of you signed up for? When the fuck...? How are there so many of you?? And in spite of that title, this post is still long as fuck

Anyways I finished Void Paradox and it sure made me feel a certain way. [Cut to footage of me literally screaming anytime Laurance showed emotion in the series]. Gotta say, as a long time Laurance fan, this is really nice to have. I've been going on my tirades about how Jess ruined Laurance for the sake of Aaron, and how Laurance never really bounced back from this character assassination, but I wasn't entirely right. He sort of bounced back?

Well, we got this. I still would have liked Laurance in Love-Love Paradise but I guess I'll take him in this series. And honestly, it's the best Laurance content I've gotten that isn't fan content since... well, since I first watched the show back in 2015 when I was a literal fetus. Every time after I've gone back and watched as Laurance got written poorly from honestly really early episodes sometimes (looking at you Episode 65), and had to deal with the unfortunate truth that he was essentially unimportant to the story Jess decided to tell with both her series, despite being the main character of one of them.

It's so refreshing to have quality Laurance content, and we got a variety of it in this show. He's so expressive, so alive, so emotional. I've always loved Laurance because surprise surprise, the men in my life weren't always the most emotionally vulnerable, so I latched onto fictional men who were as a coping mechanism! Yayyy! And Laurance has always been a very emotionally vulnerable character, at least in the beginning. It's part of the tragedy that is his character arc in Season 2. That Laurance is usually vulnerable, that he's the one who's always willing to talk about his emotions, but the calling is making it harder to open up, and the world has only become crueler to men like him who dare to feel too much.

Wow I just keep sliding into depressing content in this post, I'm trying to praise Laurance's writing in this series. Because it's good. I have my problems with Void Paradox as a whole, but as a showing for my favorite character in the entire Aphverse, a chance at redemption, it's fantastic. As I said Laurance is so expressive in this series, largely thanks to Sebastian Todd being an absolutely phenomenal voice actor who clearly knows and cares about this character. His performance is absolutely excellent and a great high note for this character to go off on.

I cannot emphasize how much I adore every little thing about Laurance's portrayal. The flirtiness, the smug bastard energy, the very sincere and open care, that one scene where he gets super embarrassed and then whimpers that I haven't listened to like eighteen times. The whole thing is great. His dynamic with this alternate version of Aphmau is so good, it's so great to see him bounce off of other characters. I just love it so much.

That scene where he realizes that he's in a similar scenario to the Nether and literally instantly jumps to "If it comes down to it, let me sacrifice myself," I SCREAMED AT THIS. The whole series whenever he angsts over his old world I scream, but that line really hit me. Fuck whatever you say about Laurmau in every universe, the universal truth of Laurmau, nay the universal truth of Laurance is this;

"I would sacrifice myself so you could live in every universe."

That's Laurance! That's Laurance with literally anyone you want!! This is the best characterization Laurance has ever gotten. It's consistent with his character, and I love the fact that Mod Aphmau doesn't even let him finish his consideration of self-sacrifice, she just shuts it down and it's a great contrast to what Laurance is used to. I adore how that's what he jumps to, I adore the fact that he's as clueless as I am about the lore this season, I love the rivals esque thing he's got going on with Jaiden, that was fun. Lotta potential there. This was just a good time. I cannot emphasize how delightful Laurance was in this series. How his delightful presence is the most enjoyable thing in the series, and a literal blessing unto us all.

Wasn't it nice to feel good about an Aphmau series for like.. two minutes. Anyways here's the part where I get a little salty with Jess, as per usual. I'm not going to go too in depth on my problems with Void Paradox as a story because it's mercifully short and a lot of my complaints did come from a standpoint of not knowing any of the lore of Mod Mod World which might have hindered my full ability to understand the larger story.

I can however get VERY salty about the fact that I didn't even know Void Paradox was a thing that had Laurance in it until 2024!! It came out in 2018! How did this happen? Well the answer is very simple, the cause is the bane of my very existence. My Street Season 6 When Angels Fall. [I am shaking with rage]

I know you've likely read how much I can tear into season 2 Episode 95, and oh my Irene can I tear into that episode, but there's a similar but differently visceral emotion When Angels Fall makes me feel. Let's call it a sort of divine rage. And now, I have one more reason to hate it. Because Void Paradox, a series with actual quality content, was released at the same time as whatever the fuck that was, meaning it never had a chance.

For a bit of personal context, I briefly became active in the Aphmau fanbase when this season came out and during the time leading up to it. I had seen every season of My Street, and despite not being the biggest fan of where Jess took the series, I liked a lot of the characters and was invested in where they would go from here. I was knee deep in the My Street trenches when the many many different bombs dropped. Melissa dying but then she didn't but maybe she did and I literally spent hours arguing with people on this, Ein is turning everyone evil, there's a doomsday device, forever potion nonsense is happening, Travis' dad is evil maybe, Aaron is going insane, the multiverse is falling apart, and then Jess just killed the best character in the entire series, dare I say the entire Aphverse, dare I say the entire universe of existence as we know it--

It was a lot. And in all the chaos Void Paradox just... came out. It came out right before episode 9 of When Angels Fall came out. And anyone else who was there during the war... they know what that episode did to us. What it did to me. I wasn't the same after that episode came out. I felt like I had lost a part of myself. Something I wasn't sure I'd ever be able to get back...

And as a result, I and a lot of people didn't see Void Paradox. Looking at the numbers, Void Paradox struggled to get above 1 million viewers for most episodes, while the lowest viewed episode of When Angels Fall sits at a cozy 2.9 million as an established series. Void Paradox is objectively better as a series and deserves to have a second season. We deserve to explore more of the weird ideas Jess clearly had while making it, we deserve to know if a cure can be found, and we, or maybe just me and I'm feeling selfish here, deserve to know if Laurance is okay.

Jess has already taken one comfort character away from me. I'll be damned if she takes another.

[watchfuldeer]

“in the alternate universe where eps 8-9-10 didn’t get rewritten”

Wait, rewritten how?? May I ask? Should I?

i wrote way too much sorry

they were rewritten to include shiv being pregnant, which hadn't been written into the season until that point. everything in 8-9-10 relating to shiv's pregnancy was an extremely hasty last minute addition, which is why it made no damn sense narratively when they dropped it into the beginning of 4.04, in a scene they filmed towards the end of shooting. every person who said in the interim between s3 and s4, shiv is not fucking pregnant, was in fact entirely correct, and they didn't plan to write it at all and it sticks out like a sore thumb in terms of succession's otherwise quite delicate plotting. which is especially disappointing given the huge payoff that paying close attention had during s3.

so, it scuppered their plot big time, but they just about clawed it together, if you ignore like. every emotional beat between episodes 1-7 lol. which is a real shame! i'm sure jesse had good intentions. but yeah, that's why they were rewritten. i think 8 and 10 weren't even rewritten to a substantial degree, but 9 is hanging by a thread in terms of cohesion - it's the only episode where they had any time to put 'oh shiv is also having a baby' scenes in, and reading the scripts it's just so clear that other stuff not only hit the cutting room floor but got swept away completely. connor is pretty much a non-entity after 4.08, for instance.

as for tom and greg (and shiv and matsson, and greg and matsson, and that whole mess of a love square) i think reading between the lines there are things missing. i can't say for sure what they were, but the script books were highly edited for publication, and no way is jesse ever going to personally give me a straight answer to the question 'what was shiv's actual arc in s4, before it became She Is Pregnant', or 'why did you prevaricate in the edit on tomgreg and tomshiv to the detriment of both, but mostly at the expense of tom, which felt really weird while watching the season because where the fuck did he go'. and yet, i think the denouement for both was really fucking good. stuck the landing despite taking a bizarre, last minute route there.

but yeah, if tom and greg did bang, it was 4.09. because the final scene for tom and shiv in 4.09 > first scene for tom and shiv in 4.10 makes very very little sense for either of them. it's like something else happened for tom at the end of 4.09 than what we saw. because the beginning of the finale he's with greg like yeah we're divorcing byeeeeee, and like wouldn't that have a lot more weight if he'd done anything other than be so eepy at logan's wake, while greg was crawling on his knees for tom to mencken and had that deleted scene with ewan. wouldn't greg almost betraying tom in the finale be higher stakes if they'd slept together, wouldn't it be more obvious and devastating that tom invites shiv into the car because she's suddenly more useful as his wife because of the decision she made at the vote... i simply think it would have been delicious.

huge caveat that this is just my thoughts. just my lil ol theories and thots. i read scripts and think about this stuff alot and have kept an eye on behind the scenes shenanigans. maybe shiv slept with matsson instead! maybe greg did! idk! but there are hanging threads that were snipped imo, rather than wonky plotting from the outset.

[hottakehoulihan]

Ward reread rants/musings/babblings, as I go through arc 6

I don't think you get to create a cohesive fictional world without being a "control freak" (not a very fair term, but I just want to dash this off I don't intend to write essays) about it. People may advocate for 'death of the author' but the author needs to stay very much alive to actually create anything that aspires to quality. So, I'm 100% in favor of an author having unbending WOG even as I'll add my own headcanon on after the fact.

Also, as rambly as my typing gets, talking IRL to people is way worse and the folk who can pick up what I'm trying to communicate are rare (and I treasure them). I understand the frustration of "no I'm trying but you're not getting it and I'm not communicating it but I do know it: the structure of this thing is such that it behaves this way and not that way.

And hell, maybe if the Worm fans (?) hadn't made interacting with the Wormverse a tiresome and depressing exercise for WB, he'd allow that what people think about themselves and others as teenagers is likely to change profoundly if they live through another decade and if their headcrabs / traumas don't interfere too much with their thought processes and outlooks.

So I'm a WB sympathizer.

That said, if he said Ward was the least fun he had writing? It kinda shows. I discovered Worm after it was entirely complete, and in fact what with the vagaries and vicissitudes of life Pale was the first WB thing I had to wait for updates to finish. ...but I recall WB used to playfully troll the audience in the comments, and also played games with them on the side, and was just a goofy guy when he wasn't being the epic serialist. And I have to remind myself of this because he's--Cherrypop driving a murder truck over the protagonists notwithstanding--serious and tired-seeming now. (This could also be the demands of our era and aging.)

But yeah; there are WB-isms that grate on me a bit (I've kvetched about "less" for "fewer", but also there's "blood ran cold" and "sooner than later" (a regionalism? I've heard it "sooner rather than later" but maybe it's a Canuck thing?) and having a guy named Rain be intregal to the plot/action while there's actual precipitation going on and just blithely using the same words, or repeating the same word three times in two sentences. And there's more. It's maybe a style thing, and it's absolutely parseable and that means it's forgivable or even fine and I'm just being picky and wanting poetry from prose and if I don't like it I should get back to writing my own stuff and doing better, but I suspect that Ward is the "write a book in a month by getting to your wordcount and don't worry too much about editing" entry into WB's oeuvre. He had ideas, he had a story, and as John Scalzi puts it, writing is a job when you are getting paid so you do it whether your heart's in it or not and the technique from practice and the effort will get it done and you eat your mistakes and learn from them just like cooking.

(I like Scalzi's take, that if you're getting paid to write you write and damn the torpedoes or your own mood. I'll keep doing it for not-pay so that it's not a job, because I want to enjoy it. Also, I prefer the idea of the audience not getting input until the deed is done. I think if Breaking Bad had been produced in entirety without a test audience--like The Wire was--it would have been a vastly better show. But we wouldn't have Jesse to ship with Waltuh, so...YMMV.)

So yeah; I'm only on arc six in my reread, and unfortunately post-GM Victoria reminds me too much of the parts of myself that I like least* so it's hard for me to like her as a protag, but there are bits I'm looking forward to (banter with the Heartbroken and their parents, Kensie's whole deal, grumpy haughty Damselite doings) and I do set the book down reluctantly (rather than with relief) so I am enjoying much of the ride, even with some regret that it couldn't have been more fun for the author and--consequently--for the audience.

I guess it's got some similarities to the Simarillion; it adds context but part of your engagement will depend on your engagement with the previous work.

---------------------

And of course there's Amy, who I love from the beginning to end of Worm and while I could wish she could transcend her own trauma and become happy and healthy and confident and comfortable, in her own brain and social situations. (I wish that for myself too, and for each of you, and we have the freedom to be the authors of large parts of our own stories; if it's believable that any of us struggle but fail or fail to struggle, it's believable for Amy.) Well, I am rereading partly to review her situation and renew my understanding of what actually happened WRT her and also titans because it's foggy. ...but although I want what I want, some people just don't get the roll of the dice to achieve the right situation that allows them to escape their own traps.

Ward is that notional car that was put together on a Monday by skilled mechanics who maintained their professionalism and gritted their teeth and worked through their hangovers to make sure it passed diagnostics and QC, but...but.

----------------------------

Ward's also the story of how someone learns reconcile and achieve comfort with their long-established contemporary who has a monstrous side but is still a being worthy of love and consideration and can be--with patience--a close friend.

Shame that the monster side of Amy wasn't the one we're talking about here.

---------------------------------------

I could write another disjointed rant on the subject of Amy alone, but I'd best finish my reread first so I have all the info fresh in my brain-ocean.

But in case I don't? Here's my hot take, which at one point I had as long as the above but the subject is fraught, deleted entirely, wrote a different take on, it's STILL a hot take, and there are things in it that are loadbearing squick points for me so I'm leaving them deleted:

Amy, of her own free will, and in canon that is actually discussed in early Ward, temporarily turned off all of Victoria's emotions and then gave Victoria the option to remember or forget all the things Amy did that will give Victoria trauma For Ever. That was an entirely unpragmatic but arguably top-tier ethical choice for Amy to do.

Amy was monstrous. Sure, all humans are monsters at various points in their lives. Doug Forcett isn't real but he still had things to repent even after his childhood, and even if Yeshua Ben-Yosef was exactly what his marketers and fans described him as, he still intentionally tortured and caused death, not including the suffering his inactions caused. (What was he going to do? Avoid his abusive parent by spending all day in the hospital? No. That's what Amy did. Bonus; she didn't enjoy it, so it was even more saintlike than it would be if she got satisfaction from it.) (I'm saying it: Amy is bigger than Jesus. If you shoot me, be sure to carry a copy of Catcher in the Rye or it won't be any fun.)

But Amy stepped across a much bigger line than even normal human monstrosity (no sense dwelling on normal human monstrosity; it's everywhere and part of it is choosing not to see it but I have to avert my eyes sometimes or I'll become a pillar of salt) and it took her some time and a little circumstance to stop doing the monster thing. And now (late Worm through early Ward at least) she's martyring herself, (Jesus get out of my post!) or trying to stop being a martyr because it's been years and the world ended and redemption isn't 100% about martyring it's about being a better person too.

Amy--even the most heavily monstrous Amy imaginable in the text--is utterly redeemable, and closer to it than many of those who aren't framed as needing redemption.

Hang in there girl.

And I'll hang in there on my reread. The highlight of the first half of arc six is Imp bantering with Bitch and Bitch telling Victoria she's a good girl (not with that wording that would break the reality, but it was still cute) for finding a lost dog.

[emmafallsinlove]

Dean “violently kicked a duffel bags” is such an exaggeration. He kicked a duffel bag so what? He has a right to be mad, people act like he hit her. Also he’s a teenage boy who’s still learning how to handle relationships. Calling him an abuser is a leap.

first of all if you’re celebrating Christmas so i wish you an happy holiday!

now, shall we begin why dean is, in fact, an abusive piece of shit?

look, i didn’t made those gifset but even if i was, i would’ve still think that dean is an abusive piece of shit. and “he was a teenager boy” isn’t an excuse when he, an adult, cheat on his wife with his ex… girlfriend in her room while leading her to believe they broke up?

everything he did from the beginning is just wrong. by kissing her in their… what? third interaction ever in a public place, mind you? how is that normal? by building her a car and than dump her because she didn’t said i love you back? that’s not normal behavior.

the amount of times he calls, the amount of letters he sent in s3 while she’s in washington. his reaction to everything, really, is not normal.

there’s a way to react to anything, and the fact that rory had to write him a letter to explain what was going on because she was afraid of his reaction and the fact that he kicking the bag in public and yes, could’ve hurt rory as well him says a lot about him as a person.

now that being said i would also add that he has every right to be angry. hell, i’ll be angry if i’ll ever build a car and than it got destroyed but also, i would put my anger aside because who cares about the car while considering the fact that the person that i loved got into a car accident. it wasn’t rory or jess fault.

it was a car accident. there was something on the road, jess didn’t want to hurt it and so they got into a car accident.

it was a car accident and he could’ve react way better and not by kicking a bag on the floor because he got furious that the car broke down or something.

the way he’s always around in the beginning of jess and rory relationship, always trying to pick up fight with jess… he thinks he owns rory, dude. you broke up with her in a public place for everyone to see! you had no dignity to break up with her behind closed doors.

and that’s the thing, he always twists it around so he is the victim in every situation and not, in fact, rory. that been yelled at her house and paris, paris, had to step in and protect her.

the way rory literally had a whole panic attack about losing this bracelet he made her, as though she was so afraid to tell him she lost it. like how is that normal? a normal person would just say “it’s okay, stuff like that happen. i’ll make you a new one”

one of my favorite compression is jess reaction to rory hanging out with dean at miss patty show thing VS dean reaction to rory hanging around Jess.

jess doesn’t yell about it, or making a scene, or making rory feel like she had to hide things from him. he just asks her to tell him about it next time so he won’t read it on elsewhere and then he… moves on. like a normal boyfriend should. her entire relationship with dean is like walking around eggs being afraid he’ll get mad!

the fact that rory needs reassurance that jess doesn’t mad at her at the festival episode just shows how badly dean treated her. if she was still with dean, he would’ve yelled already, making a whole scene about how rory dares to hangs around people who isn’t him, as he did in 2x13. it wasn’t rory’s fault jess bought the basket, yet dean make it her fault and turns it around her “you’re hurting me now” (making her feel guilty about the whole thing in the first place) instead of just respecting the fact that there are stuff in this town that doesn’t have nothing to do with him.

jess had more money. the whole point of the whole thing was you have more money, you buy the basket, you take the girl who made the basket to lunch. jess didn’t forced rory to go with him, jess didn’t do anything wrong, he did exactly what everyone else did.

like correct me if i’m wrong but lorelai had to drug out luke to buy her basket so he could take her to lunch and yet, it’s rory’s fault that jess bought her basket.

if I remember correctly jackson also didn’t bought sookie’s basket for some reason and had to buy it from the person who bought it in the first place.

but regardless, you know what the first thing dean does when rory goes with jess? he goes to cry to lorelai about it, to spin it on rory, that rory would be the blame here and not, idk, him for not letting this go.

when rory comes back from it, actually happy and having a good time, lorelai takes dean’s side because dean made her to believe that it is all jess / jess and rory fault.

he blames his reaction and his behavior on her.

so it’s not, “he was a teenager boy he kicked a bag”, it’s more complicated and dean is an abusive piece of shit and that’s the hill i would die on.

[lovebugism]

Now that you watched all of the bear what are your thoughts on the current season? I feel like I wanted so much more but I’m also happy with how the finale went. I think I just care more about the other characters and I’m over carmy sabotaging himself and the whole Claire thing

thank u for asking anon i'm about to be so annoying about this bc i have Plenty of thoughts (just a warning, there is an entire essay below the cut)

season 3 wasn't nearly as bad as i expected it to be, which is coming from someone who's super duper partial to season 1. like i definitely miss the old kitchen and how the focus was mainly on that and the og characters, but i thought this season was decent! it just felt like there was a ton going on and nothing was really resolved imo. that's why i think the tina and sugar episodes were the best ones, bc at least there was some pay off, you know? (which. don't even get me started on those. i get chills just thinking about them.)

i think the finale was fine for what it was. like i said, i would've loved some kind of resolution. i really wish we could've got an actual answer about whether syd was leaving or not, or at the very least, an inkling of interaction between richie and carmy. but i loved seeing luca and jess and everyone all together!! i can't wait to see them more next season and hopefully watch them interact with more of the side characters!

speaking of. i need the writers to give all the screentime they gave to the faks this season to ebra, tina, sweeps, manny, etcetcetc. i love matty and i don't actually mind the faks too much, but i thought everyone was just being dramatic about how much screentime they were given b4 i watched the season. (spoiler alert: they were not). the faks are cool and everything, but i want to see more of the og characters!! i'm praying we get an ebra episode next season. i want to see him and mikey being bffs so bad!!!

lastly. the claire and carmy thing. claire is a cool character, i don't mind her too much, but i wish she could just be a cool side character and not an entire plot point. the fact they made an entire season about a single interaction (which, imo, wasn't that serious to being with) made the season almost unwatchable for me. almost. i just don't know why the writers would write claire and carmy the way they have been and expect anyone to care about them, said with peace and love <3

also. i forgot to mention the parallels between syd and carmy!!!! they were just *chefs kiss* the way he cooked her favorite meal before they ever met???? they were always meant to find each other, i'm SICK. and those scenes by the water??? and the panic attack scene??? heartwrenchingly beautiful. all of it.

tldr; season 3 was fine, it just felt like it was kinda cut in half. i would like to see less flashbacks of claire, less mentions of what carmy said in the freezer, and less faks next season. please and thank u.

[roboraindrop]

What? Rain writing for the first time in over a year??

Here's the first part of my fix-it fic for Virgil! I have more planned, but right now this felt like a good place to end. So, here's me getting too emotional over an obscure horror anthology character :'D

--

"Frank and Jesse James never planned an ice cream warehouse robbery…" Virgil muttered to himself as he waited outside for the next truck to load. He always hated waiting, especially when he knew he had something important to do that day. His brother Billy had plotted his revenge against the man who had reported him for robbery and sent him to prison two years ago, but Virgil just wasn't sure why he had to be a part of it… At least until he'd messed up a part of the plan in his recount the day before.

"We're brothers," Billy had been so quick to remind him after a swift, sharp smack to the face, "You and me are all each other got! Forget about your damn Jesse James comics, forget about the nothin' runnin' through your head all day, and think about me. Who's always lookin' out for you?"

"You are, Billy." Virgil had responded, looking down at his hands, "You're the best."

He always caved when Billy brought up their bond. Ever since they were kids, it had been the two of them. Billy was the one who got him his job at the warehouse, Billy was the one who went to jail trying to steal for the two of them to have a better life. His whole life was thanks to Billy. If his brother wanted him to do something, who was he to argue? If he got smacked around a little, called an ableist slur or two, that was just what he deserved for not being able to contribute like his brother could.

"Let's go over the plan one more time."

They had recounted again and again, and as Virgil stood outside, he mouthed his plan silently. First, he would tell Tom to go pick up a delivery from the distric supervisor. After he left he woudl wait for Cooter to take his break, then… Then…

"Excuse me…?"

Virgil looked up quickly at the sudden voice, his bright blue eyes meeting briefly with another pair. He hadn't been expecting anybody- Well, that wasn't true. He was expecting the next truck, but he had been so long in his own thoughts of the robbery that he had entirely forgotten that fact. The eye contact didn't last long as both he and the other party looked away swiftly. "U-um, hi. Can I help you?"

The person before him wore a bright yellow dress, something that greatly contrasted the overcast day. It was almost too bright to look at, like they were the sun. When they spoke, it was with a woman's voice, but the facial hair they sported was saying otherwise.

"Actually I uh, have an order. I'm here to pick up for Rain Badd."

"Oh! Oh, yeah, Miss Badd! Or u-uh… Mister…. Um…"

"Mx, actually. I use they/them pronouns."

"R-right! Mx. Badd. We've got your order, just go ahead and sign-" As Virgil pulled out the clipboard, he couldn't help but notice the comic book that Rain carried under their arm. "Ain't that a Jesse James comic?"

"Hm? Oh! Yeah. I actually just picked it up, I'm a collector! Kinda silly, someone my age reading comics, but…"

"I don't think that's silly at all, Mx. I'm a big Jesse James comics fan!" The smile Virgil felt on his face was the first genuine one he'd had in what felt like ages, and he didn't even realize it. "Would you mind if I looked at it?"

"Not at all, go ahead!" They untucked it from its safety and handed it over. Still brand-new in a sleeve to keep the dust off was a copy of Jesse James Great Train Robbery. "This is the last comic I needed to complete my collection! I mean, of Jesse James at least. I'm still starting out, but someday I'd love to have a full collection of all my favorites."

"That's incredible!" Virgil handled the comic with care as he turned it over in his hands, then looked up with wide eyes. "I guess if you collect 'em they just sorta sit there, huh? You don't read 'em or nothin'?"

"Y'know, you'd think so, wouldn't you? See, I've got this thing… I just can't keep things up! I love to read and reread them. That's what they were made for, after all."

"Wow," He breathed as he handed the comic back, "I never knew you could collect stuff and still use it! I wish I could read all the Jesse James comics- He's my hero!"

Before he had the chance to apologize fully, the heavy footsteps of Ms. Grafungar, his boss, approached. "Virgil!" She screeched, "You quit talkin' that lady's ear off and you get her truck loaded right now, or there'll be big trouble!" She hesitated just a moment, "And wipe that stupid smile off your face, this ain't a damn funfair."

"Your hero robs trains," Rain teased lightly, but smiled so genuinely at him that it was contagious, and he couldn't keep the smile off his face as well. "You mind if I go ahead and sign the slip now?"

"O-oh, yeah, right! Here you go." Virgil scratched the back of his head nervously, "I'm real sorry about that, I just get carried away--"

The smile disappeared right quick off of Virgil's face, and he nodded quickly. "Yes ma'am, but uh, Mx. Badd ain't no lady, Ms. Grafungar."

"You keep that smart shit to yourself, dammit! That's a woman if I ever saw one! Tryin' to tell me that's a man…"

Virgil frowned, his brow furrowing. He didn't understand her reaction. "I didn't say that…"

"You gonna stand there like a brainless idiot or are you gonna load the truck?" She snapped, but when she turned back to Rain, her tone was as polite as ever. "I'm sorry ma'am. He's a little slow- He's usually workin' in the back freezer and not allowed to talk to the customers." At this, Virgil shrunk in posture and shuffled his feet. It seemed as if this were a common occurance by the way he took it in stride, quickly getting to work loading the truck to avoid getting reprimanded futher.

Rain looked up to the manager and tilted their head with eyes narrow. They didn't even bother to correct her on their title; They had something more worrying on their mind. "Why not? There's nothing wrong with him- He's been a delight to talk to!"

"What- Did he talk your ear off about those damn comic books?" She spotted the one in Rain's hand and quickly crossed the gap between them, snatching it in one swift motion. Rain, taken by surprise at the audacity of the woman, allowed it to happen… For the time being. It wasn't until Ms. Grafungar stomper her way over to Virgil with it and raised it as if to strike him that they snapped out of their shocked state.

"Now what the hell did I tell you about bringing these goddamn picture books to work with you?"

The cornered stock boy flinched at the raised hand, and it was obvious to any bystander that this wasn't the first time he'd been threatened with violence- And even worse, it wasn't an empty threat.

"Now you wait one minute!" Rain hurried over, placing themself between the two. If there was going to be an impact, they were dead set that it would fall on them and not the innocent Virgil. "For starters, that comic book belongs to me, thank you very much!" They plucked the book from the raised hand of the woman, "Second, who do you think you are, talking to him like that? Don't you realize you're talking to a human being?"

"We're the only vendor in town- You'll need to drive three towns over before you find another ice cream vendor of our size! You're just starting out in this business, you need us!"

The fire in the gaze of the supervisor wet out as quickly as it was lit, and Rain's chest ached to think of the hell her employees must go through on a day-to-day basis. "Oh my, I'm so sorry! I didn't realize that literature was yours!" She quickly straightened herself up, ignoring the comment about her cruelty to her employee. "I didn't damage anything, I hope. To make up for it, how about I add an extra box of ice cream for your truck? No charge!"

Rain shook their head, "That won't be necessary, thank you. After witnessing how you treat your own employess just because they're a little different from you, I won't be placing an order with you again."

"At the prices you're offering, I think you need my business more than I need you. What I do need, ma'am, is for you to take a good, hard look at how you treat your employees. You turn it around and maybe I'll reconsider."

Fuming, Ms. Grafungar turned on her heel. "Have a good day, Miss Badd."

Virgil nodded, but still had that kicked puppy look in his eyes. "I hate her. She's always mean to me, and insultin' me and my brother…" He remembered his brother, and their plan. He started going over it once again, but another thought crossed his mind, as if he had just put it together. "You stood up for me… Nobody ever did that before…"

As soon as she turned her back, Virgil made a face at her, and Rain raised their middle finger in what was an accurate description of just where she could put her bad attitude and shitty business practices. After a moment, Rain approached Virgil.

"Are you okay?"

"Of course I did! You don't deserve to be talked to like that. You especially don't deserve to be hit." They knew it was stepping over some boundaries, but they felt a strange desire to protect Virgil, and they leaned in slightly, placing a hand on his arm, "She's done it before, hasn't she?"

Starting to get nervous, Virgil shook his head.

"N-No, she hasn't…."

"…But someone else has." Rain finished for him, and he looked at the ground.

"Just my brother Billy, but he don't mean nothin' by it. He just gets angry sometimes, that's all. See, its true, like what Ms. Grafungar said. I'm a little slow. Sometimes I deserve it. "

Rain's heart nearly shattered on the spot at this, and they frowned deeply. "I don't know you, Virgil, but I know that you don't deserve that. Nobody deserves that. I'm sorry that you've had to live with that."

"You don't gotta be sorry or nothin'," Virgil said softly, the kindness in Rain's eyes making his stomach feel all fluttery. Nobody had ever looked at him like that before. He was experiencing a lot of firsts today! "I'm used to it. Besides, it don't do no good to stand up to Billy like you did Ms. Grafunger. She backs down, but Billy don't. It'd be big trouble if you ever talked to Billy like that."

"Big trouble, huh? For me, or for you?" When his expression fell and he began to shrink into himself again, Rain spoke softly. "Hey, I know that I don't live your life, and I'm just some stranger you met at work, but… I want you to know that there is more out there for you. You don't have to take the abuse. You're worth more. Don't forget it, okay?"

Falling silent, Virgil felt a few tears prick at his eyes, which he didn't dare let fall. Billy said tears were for wussies, and the DeLuca brothers weren't wussies. "… You're really nice, Rain. You said things to me that nobody else ever has… I sure won't forget you, or what you said."

"Good." They smiled, and the warmth that spread through the quiet stockboy was more than he ever imagined from something as simple as a grin. He was so distracted by this warmth that he harly even noticed Rain taking out a small notepad and scribbling something down. "If you ever need anything, and I mean anything…" They tore out and handed him the page, their phone number scrawled across it, "Give me a call. I may not be able to do much, but, well… Everyone needs a friend now and then. Maybe we can read comics together sometime."

"I'd like that…" Virgil smiled again, feeling the paper crinkle under his clumsy fingers. "I'll give you a call, promise, I will!"

With that, the vision of the sun climbed into their ice cream truck and drove off. Now, Virgil could focus on what he was supposed to- His brother's plan.

[sunshinebunnie]

Hi! Regarding the Director’s Cut asks, I may not be doing it right but I’m curious…

What inspired you to write Prairie Doll? Such a unique AU, I would love to hear more about your research process. ❤️

*Squealing* Thank you so much for the ask, Jess!!! (Sorry in advance because I’m totally gonna nerd out. lol) So, given Fez’s interest in Little House on the Prairie and being all ‘bout that farm life as his long term plan, it got me thinking. One of my two majors in college was History, and I had a subconcentration in U.S. History circa the Civil War/Reconstruction era. (I’ve been fascinated with this period of US History for a loooooooooooong time. lol) Anyways, it got me thinking of what would Fez’s life look like during this era. Although people were going out to California during this time, because the Transcontinental railroad hadn’t been completed yet, I hesitated to have Lexi try to follow Cassie out to California because if she’d lost contact with her, it would be highly unrealistic that Lexi going after her would be successful, and I’ve always known I’m going to reunite the Howard sisters in my story (It’s coming! I SWEAR!!!).

Given those 2 constraints, I tried to think of somewhere in the US that would be relatively far from where Lexi & Cassie started (which would make a little more sense why Cassie was responding to a mail order bride advertisement), while having enough going on that I could introduce the other characters in a way that made sense without trying to retcon entire arcs/storylines, but still being a little chaotic in a way that a state/city that was established for 100-200 years at this point in history likely wouldn’t be. I also didn’t want to feel duty bound to really dive into Reconstruction politics/attitudes by setting the story in the post-Civil War South, not to mention, I just didn’t get the vibe that Fez would’ve fought for the Confederacy. The other thing that I really enjoy about it (although it’s definitely been challenging at times) is that it’s such a fun era of history to think about how would things that we don’t necessarily think about play out in this world.

For instance, Ash’s awkward clothing sitch. Like, for the most part (certainly in canon Euphoria), if Ash started having a growth spurt or he had clothes he didn’t like, what have you, he or Fez could just go to the store or order something on Amazon or whatever. They have the means—both actually and economically—to get him clothes he likes and that fit. The whole idea that people would give him shit for not having clothes that he doesn’t look awkward in is a little crazy. But, transport him to the late 1860s/early 1870s? Yeah, now it’s a little less realistic (even for merchants with a little bit of money) to think he either (a) has some huge selection of clothing to pick from or (b) it would be easy for him to just get/find/buy clothes that are the right size. I mean, commercial clothing production really was just not as much of a thing back then, and clothes were still fairly expensive. It wouldn’t be uncommon to expect multiple members of the family to wear the same clothes, but add in the fact that they’re not living with Kitty full time and there’s no other wife/female relative who would be expected to take care of family tailoring for them, yeah, Ash more than likely would get stuck not only wearing Fez’s hand-me-downs but wearing them even though they don’t fit and he looks ridiculous doing so. But those kinds of things are great for the story! Because then it makes it easy/easier to figure out how to introduce the characters into each other lives and have those sub-conflicts (What does A need from B?) that help drive the story forward and develop the characters within the larger context of the story I’m trying to tell. 

Anyways, I hope you like this BTS take on Prairie Doll!! Thank you so so so much for letting me nerd out and talk about my story/writing thoughts!!! 🥰💗🥰💗🥰💗

[mediocre-eternity]

Does Daniel take you hunting to clubs like he did in Rio? Do you enjoy dancing and feeding with him?

I’m not actually sure if Daniel did, in fact, dance in Rio. I think you’re referring to passages about Daniel Molloy from the book Prince Lestat.

Ah, Anonymous Mortal, I don’t really know why Lestat writes the things that he writes. His recent books are mostly pure fiction, but he likes to occasionally announce to us he’s taking stories from our minds. Perhaps Marius did take Daniel to all sorts of countries, including Rio de Janiero and maybe Daniel was fine to be on his own in crowds of mortals on that particular night. But I will tell you, when he came to me in New York City he wasn’t capable of even small gatherings without triggering blind hunger. I once took him to an art museum that had a fairly claustrophobic display and I had to drag him out of the room like a misbehaving dog, where afterwords he was crying into my chest about “not being able to do it.” Again, it mystifies me what Lestat’s recent books have been about but he’s also told me his writing phase is over for good. We shall see.

But— in much more recent years, large crowds of mortals aren’t much of a challenge anymore; including wandering off. I have taken him to places where mortals dance and we’ve had a wonderful time. Much like before, we enjoy people watching and sniffing out the odd and eccentric mortals. I really believe Daniel enjoys this even more now that he’s within The Blood. I was so fearful that that part of his personality, his love for “weirdos”, would be destroyed, but I am so overjoyed that we still share this between us.

Jesse and Benji tend to put him more at ease than I do (I think he’s more pressured to “be good” when I’m around, although I try not to judge him for it) and they’ve taken him out without me, too. Even more recently, he has begun to go completely out on his own.

I’ll take a picture later, but he managed to make it to Manhattan to buy me some Diptyque parfum for Valentine’s Day, completely un-chaperoned (he hates when I use the word chaperone but, my dearest one, my most beloved, if you read this entry understand that having other vampires and myself assist you has helped you and I enormously).

Feeding is an entirely separate activity. I would never feed without Daniel, at least not right now. Why pass on something so intense and so intimate? It’s too much like sex for me. More so. I am never more attracted to Daniel than when I witness him hunting, preying on and killing someone he chose for himself. He’s a still a mess at the Little Drink and sometimes needs a great deal of strength to stop drinking altogether. Ah, but reader, you will die never knowing what it’s like to watch someone you have so much love for pull from the neck of a human struggling against them.

I think it’s time I teach him some lite evisceration so that he can feast from the heart.

Though Daniel— do not read this and get excited. It will have to be a… whole thing. We can plan it, my love.

[l8rhader]

writing ask meme: 7, 17, 18 💜

7. What is your deepest joy about writing?

In real life, happy endings seem unachievable and few and far between. When I write, I get to guarantee that someone is happy. Even if it's not 'ride off into the sunset' happy, it's happy enough. It's now happy.

[usually]

17. Talk to me about the minutiae of your current WIP. Tell me about the lore, the history, the detail, the things that won’t make it in the text.

Truthfully, I started answering this yesterday and I had a much longer answer, but I closed the tumblr app in the middle of it. XD

My current WIP is a Nick and Jess surprise baby fic because they spend entirely too much time not being together, so I wanted to fix that. One thing that won't really make it in is the continued hesitance of Schmidt. I wanted to keep it fluffy and happy and, as much as I think that Schmidt especially, would have had some less than supportive things to say if they'd realized they were pregnant around the time they broke up in the show, I was NOT going to write that. :) Another thing that didn't make it in was a phone call with Jess and her sister or Nick and his brother. Their parents, yes. But I don't feel confident that it's not already too long and adding in their siblings would just make it longer.

18. Choose a passage from your writing. Tell me about the backstory of this moment. How you came up with it, how it changed from start to end. Spicy addition: Questioner provides the passage.

From Will My Love Grow?

"Did he call?"  Richie shook his head and focused straight out of the windshield.  

"No, he showed up in looking for Frank," Went answered.  He looked over at his son, so much older and still, like this, so much the same little brat he'd been when he was 12.  "Do you want to tell me what happened or do you just want me to drive you home?"

Richie hung his head, staring at the spot on his thumb he'd torn open.  "Is there a third option?"  It was a joke, really.  He had planned on calling Went later anyway, but the fact that Went did, indeed, have a 3rd option- well, at the very least a stall before he had to pick one- made it easier.

The little diner was abandoned at that hour, too late for dinner, too early for late-night.  Went pumped quarters into the jukebox and, like he always did when presented the opportunity, Richie punched in song after song.  When he got to The Chordettes, he paused, flipping to the next record agitated.  

Went let out a low whistle.  "That bad, huh?"  Richie looked at him, confused.  "You've played Eddie, My Love on every jukebox you've touched that had it since you first saw it.  You were probably 9?  What happened?"

"I'm sure he told you," Richie said, flipping the card back and forth.

"He did."  Went took a sip of his coffee, then folded his arms.  "I want to hear it from you."

Richie stared up at the neon shadows chasing on the ceiling.  “He scared me.”  Richie told Went the whole story, how he felt, what they’d both said that morning.  Went nodded along, following the story intently.  “I didn’t know if something had happened and then this morning, I was so relieved that he was okay but I was so pissed because, then, why didn’t he let me know?  If he had a project come up, there are payphones literally all over campus.  We saved up to buy a cell phone for the car for just that reason.”  Richie tapped at his napkin with his fork.  He hadn’t meant to blow up, but Eddie had accused him of hovering and that was something he didn’t do.  If that was what Eddie thought was hovering, what was he supposed to do.  “So, I told him that if he didn’t want me around, I’d figure something else out.”

Went sighed, shaking his head at his son.  “But you didn’t mean that.”

“Of course not.”  

But that was where Eddie had gotten the idea that Richie was going to leave.  “You know he thinks you do, right?”

He shook his head.  “He can’t think that.  He knows that I love him.  He knows he’s my soulmate and I would never-”  Richie took one look at his father and folded.  “Is that what he thinks?”

“Don’t you remember what his mother said about you?  About me ?”

Suddenly, it hit him.  It all hit him.  He didn't think about it much, at least not in a direct sense, but Eddie... Fuck.  Eddie had gone through so much and, of course, him leaving when they had a fight was “Is he still at your place or did he go home?”

“I told him to go home.  He might have stayed with Frank for a while, but that was hours ago.  He’s probably home by now.”  Went gave his son a soft smile.  They’d figure it out.  Still, it was nice to know that they still needed a little guidance, a swift kick in the ass every once in a while.  “Do you want to get our food to go?”

“Yeah.  And I should probably grab dinner for Eds.”  Richie scooted out of the booth to go find their waitress.  Went pumped in F8 on the jukebox and smiled as the familiar doo-wop song flooded the air.  As Richie had done a million times since he was little, he turned around and stuck his tongue out pointedly at Went.  Went returned it by blowing him a kiss off the tip of his middle finger.

This is actually thoroughly based off of a real life story for me.

My first crush was a boy named Eddie. I had a crush on him all throughout elementary school. Literally from kindergarten until the day I met [redacted for ick factor because you know me irl]. My parents used to take me to this little silver diner in Lancaster PA and Eddie My Love was on the jukebox. And, of course, me being me, I found it and, me being me, I would play it all the time. It was something I'd wanted to utilize in a Reddie story for ages and finally, I found a time for it. It's such a stupid little thing, but it's very true.

[lovelyirony]

prompt: “this story’s getting old/the homewrecker with a heart of gold” w/ tony going through his town bicycle phase?

Tony would like to announce that his cardio game is off the charts. He’s pretty sure he’s going to live until he’s 112 and he’ll still look better than Linda down the street. 

But the fact of the matter is, it is time to slow down and find someone that he likes and will support his endeavor to play mind games on the PTA board. 

In moves a man named Jim Rhodes. His arms are defined, he cooks, and he greets Tony wearing an apron and has flour on it. So he bakes for real and doesn’t rely on store-bought goods. (Neither does Tony, this is a good sign.) 

The only problem: Tony has been branded The Neighborhood Whore (trademark pending). He helped market it, by the way. Put it on his address stickers when he mails things. He regrettably has used those stickers on official bills. 

But he brings his best homemade dinner, which is lasagna, made-from-scratch garlic bread, and he also brings dessert. 

“Thank you so much,” Rhodey says, taking the pan from him. “I’ve been moving in, and I really didn’t want to resort to going out to eat or getting one of those frozen dinners.” 

“Any time,” Tony says, smiling in that soft way that makes most he wants to sleep with a little weak at the knees. “I’m Tony, you’ve either probably heard about me from the moms or you will.” 

“I’ll look forward to making my own judgments,” he says. “Call me Rhodey. I’ll see you around.” 

Over the following three weeks, Tony observes Rhodey’s behaviors: 

6:00 a.m. is a brisk run or walk around the neighborhood, lingering at the mailboxes to make sure everyone that gets a newspapers has it and delivers it to the front. 

(Tony starts getting the newspaper. Harley’s having a collage phase.) 

7:00 a.m. is when there’s movement for breakfast, although Tony’s busy waking Peter and Harley up, with more focus on Harley because the kid sleeps like a fucking tank. 

7:45 is when Harley and Peter are driven to school. 

A month in, Rhodey needs a favor. He has a meeting that he can’t miss at 3:45 p.m., and this coincides with picking up Lila. He doesn’t know anyone well enough to trust them with Lila, but–

“Just have Tony pick me up,” Lila says. “You know I’m friends with Peter.” 

“Are you sure you’re okay with that?” Rhodey asks. “Because I could try to postpone it–” 

“It’ll be fine,” Lila says. “It’ll give you a chance to go over and finally talk to him. Don’t think I haven’t noticed you looking out the kitchen window.” 

“It’s a nice window!” Rhodey says defensively. “Not my fault the view is Tony’s kitchen.” 

“View,” Lila snorts. “Go look up his number in the directory. Or return the favor of dinner and go give him some dessert and ask.” 

Rhodey decides a dessert would be too overt for a ride to school. 

So he does call him by phone number. 

“Hello, this is Tony speaking.” 

“Uh, hi!” Rhodey says. “I need a favor to ask of you, if it’s not too much.” 

“Ask away,” Tony responds. 

“Lila needs a ride home from school, and I was wondering since we’re neighbors and she wouldn’t have far to go, if you could…?” 

“Say no more,” Tony responds. “Just tell Lila to follow Peter to the car and I’ll take it from there. It’ll be just fine.” 

Of course, the PTA moms are having none of it. 

Rhodey is Eye Candy. He has nice arms, he smiles when he walks past you, and he is thinking about getting a dog from the shelter. 

He’s good. 

And he’s neighbors with Tony Stark, PTA Nightmare and Neighborhood Whore (trademark pending). 

So when Karyn notices Lila walking with Peter towards Tony’s Car (god it’s not even a family car model, YUCK) she has to take it upon herself to tell Lila that she would be happy to take her home. 

“Nah, thanks though,” Lila says. “I told my dad I’d ride home with Peter and Tony today, and that’s what he’s expecting. I’ll tell him it was nice that you volunteered.” 

(Lila will be doing no such thing because Karyn looks like she got her highlights done by a back alley has-been-hairdresser.) 

“Lila dear, before you go home would you like any snacks to take home?” Tony asks. “I have some cookies baked before school ended, fruit snacks, cheese sticks…” 

Lila supposes she can stay for a few cookies. And maybe take fruit snacks to go. 

This ends up taking an hour because no one told Lila that Tony Stark was a stay-at-home engineer/inventor/coolest person ever. 

“He’s awesome,” Peter says. “Right now we’re taking apart a motorcycle in the garage. Wanna see?” 

“Yeah,” Lila says, looking to Tony to see his reaction. “If that’s okay.” 

“Of course,” Tony says. “Peter, show her the works. But don’t stay out too late Lila, your dad is still expecting you.” 

Tony has sent a text to Rhodey that explains that Lila has decided to spend a little bit more time, feel free to collect her whenever needed. 

-

Rhodey decides he’s in love with Tony. 

Especially after he laughs in his car reading a text from Karyn explaining that if he wanted someone more “suitable” picking up Lila, she’d be more than happy to have Lila and her daughter Kaity spend more time together. 

(Lila is not a Huge Fan of Kaity. For multiple reasons. Including the spelling.) 

He knows he’s in love with Tony when he knocks on the door, Harley answers it, and he finds the man bent down over a bike helping his daughter and Peter take apart an engine. 

“Dad!” Lila says, smile brightening. “Look at this cool bike!” 

“Harley Davidson,” Rhodey observes appreciatively. 

“Hey sugar, how was the meeting?” Tony asks, leaning over to catch his eye. 

(Okay that is unfairly attractive. Too attractive.) 

“Went well, thank you,” Rhodey says. “Cinched a deal with a client. Glad to see everything’s going swimmingly over here.” 

“Did you know Tony’s an inventor?” Lila asks. “I didn’t know that!” 

Rhodey looks at Tony. 

“I’m impressed. But then again, I shouldn’t be so surprised. You’re smart as a whip.” 

Tony blushes. 

Harley makes a retching noise and says he’s going upstairs to do homework. 

- 

Tony sends Lila and Rhodey home with more than a dozen cookies and promises that Rhodey will bring back the Tupperware containers. 

“Thank you,” Rhodey says, eyes lingering. “For everything.” 

“Always happy to serve,” Tony responds, winking. “See you soon, Rhodey.” 

Plan A is complete. 

Plan B has to wait until Saturday, when it is supposed to get Spectacularly Hot and Tony will have an excuse to water his hosta plants shirtless. 

(Heaven help Rhodey.) 

[gracemyface]

Daryl: The Professional (Daryl Dixon x Young! Reader)

Chapter One

Key:

Y/n - Your Name

Y/l/n - Your Last Name

Y/e/c - Your Eye Color

Y/h/c - Your Hair Color

Requested by @ynreaderlol: Heyyy can you do more of the Daryl as a father figure? I think that’s such an interesting dynamic and I feel like Daryl is really good with kids/teens.

Series Masterlist | Next Part

Reader Gender: Neutral (They/Them)

Summary: Jess wanted you here, and now Jess is gone it’s up to Daryl to keep the promise of keeping you safe and he’s not entirely happy about it. He’ll get over it, he will.

Warnings: canon typical violence, hate symbols, Merle Dixon, and cursing.

A/n: I really like this dynamic, but I really hate the video game about Daryl’s past (what kind of game gives you passive aggressive achievements for dying too much?) This is a really cute fic tho, I’m proud of it-- even if I got carried away.

My friend moth made me listen to an hour of that one fortnite cover of American Boy, so that kinda forced me to write and you can thank her. 

Word Count: 2.1k

It’s incredibly, unbearably silent in the cabin of the truck.

Daryl’s fingers grip the steering wheel so hard that his knuckles have gone white and his face is screwed tight with some sort of anguish. You search for something to say, but you can’t quite force anything out.

His uncle was the one who wanted you around, and now his uncle is dead.

Sedalia hadn’t been what the two men had hoped it would be. The small town had gone up in flames seemingly overnight and everyone inside was dead— or undead. One minute everything was fine, they’d gotten their gas and were returning to their vehicle, and the next Jesse was dead, sprawled out on the pavement and twitching silently. You cut your hand in the fall, grabbing at the shattered windshield to catch yourself.

The bleeding had stopped, but it was throbbing now, and Daryl doesn’t look like he’s going to stop anytime soon.

“Hey…” You swallow. “I’m, uh, I’m real sorry about your uncle--”

He presses all the way down on the breaks and you jerk forward, the seat belt being the only thing to stop you from further injury.

“Here’s how this is gonna play out.” The redneck grinds out, turning in his seat to face you. “You don’ bring up Jess-- ever. In fact, we just ain’t gonna talk about ourselves at all, and then I’m gonna hand your sorry ass off to the first person that ain’t a shit for brains. You understand me?”

Swallowing your pride, cornered up against the door like a rat in a cage, you glare at him and nod. He continues driving. 

At nightfall, you settle down for camp, and he cleans your wound. When you flinch, he flinches too.

──────────────────

You fall into a routine. You’re to stay in the car until he tells you otherwise, or unless he needs you to reach into tight spaces, even if you’re just setting up camp.

Daryl thinks you’re useless. You glare at him a whole lot.

One day, when you’ve had enough, you get out of the car. He looks at you like you’re crazy, then like he might just kill you, but then you pick up one of the tent spikes.

“Let me help.”

If he thinks anything of your growing a pair, he doesn’t say-- he simply starts instructing.

You don’t have to sit in the car as much after that.

──────────────────

“Eat.” 

You look up from the odd skewer in your hand to stare at him like he’s crazy. Daryl repeats his command, poking at the small fire with a stick.

“I- how?” 

The man sighs and rolls his eyes, miming with his hands. “Like a chicken leg.”

You snort softly. “It’s a squirrel on a stick… it’s anything but a chicken leg.”

As you take a bite, wishing that you were eating a piece of the familiar fowl, you swear that, in the low light of the flames, you see the corner of his mouth twitch slightly.

──────────────────

You’re a few miles out from Fontana when Daryl puts some terrible country disc in the car.

You make a face and glance between him and the radio, eliciting a scoff from the man. Your hand, still bandaged and shaky, reaches up and clicks it off-- y/e/c eyes staring at him defiantly. His eyebrows shoot up to his hairline and he immediately clicks it back on.

“Your music sucks.” You huff, crossing your arms over your chest.

“What’re ya, twelve? You wouldn’t know good music if it smacked ya in the face.”

It’s your turn to scoff, correcting him under your breath with a bold ‘fuck you’ tacked on.

And then there’s nothing but the music.

Your body slowly turns away from him, curling towards the door as you look out the window. He’ll glance at you every now and then, too awkward to know what to say and too stubborn to try. After a few minutes of radio silence from you, Daryl ejects the CD and throws the pack into your lap.

“Don’ say I never did nothin’ for you.” 

He almost says it like it’s a joke.

──────────────────

Upon entering Fontana, gunshots could be heard over the music-- it sounded like some lunatic was shooting off just for fun. At Daryl’s instruction, you roll your window up.

“Keep yer head down.” He mumbles, cutting off the engine and pressing down on your head.

You curl up down in the foot well.

The redneck undoes his seat belt, leaning forward to look out through the windshield and out the side windows with furrowed brows. Suddenly, the bullets stop, and he looks down at you when you perk up a bit.

“Is it safe?” You whisper and he brings his finger up to his lips.

Another odd sound fills the air-- the sound of someone singing. As they get closer, it sounds like a man singing Bon Jovi; he perks up as it gets louder, and very suddenly he’s jumping out of the car.

There’s a joyful greeting and a quick hushed conversation. You remain in your place, your heart beating rapidly.

“Just you?” The other voice asks, laughing hoarsely.

“Naw.” Daryl sounds strange. “Hey, Y/n, you can come on out now.” 

When he knocks on the windshield, you unfurl yourself carefully and slowly peek over the dash.

Stood next to Daryl is a man dressed in all black; he’s got a gun in his hands and a cigarette hanging from his lips and he smiles malevolently.

“Well, well. Never took you for a charity case, little brother.”

You get out of the car, scrambling around the strange man and to your companion’s side. 

“Where’s your daddy, kid? Or was my little brother getting real busy while I was gone?”

You ball your hands into fists, willing your voice to be steady. “He’s dead.”

“What a damn shame.” Daryl’s brother tilts his head in faux sympathy. “Would’ve been nice to know my brother finally got it wet.”

“Lay off it, Merle.” Daryl sighs.

“What? Can’t a man wish for his brother to be taken care of?”

“Merle!”

“Why else would you be carrying this dead weight? Say, if they’re not our blood why don’t you and I just leave ‘em and go?”

“Merle, shut up! The kid’s with me, that’s final.”

He laughs at his little brother’s outburst and starts… walking away.

“Hey, where you goin’?”

“I left something in the bar, why don’t you stay there and babysit a little while longer.”

Daryl huffs in annoyance and throws his arms up, turning to you after.

“... did he have an iron cross on his belt?” You’re hesitant, dragging your eyes off Merle’s retreating figure.

He snorts and shakes his head at you, effectively telling you that the questions should stop there.

After a few uncomfortable minutes, Daryl sighs and starts patting his pockets. “You know how to shoot a gun, kid?”

“Sorta, why?”

He pulls a small pistol out of some pocket. “Cause we’re goin’ after him.”

You balk at him and then the gun. “He wants to leave me behind.”

Daryl pays your words no mind, checking the magazine and safety before handing you the gun.

“He’s a wannabe nazi!”

The Dixon brother gives you a look and starts walking. After weighing your options, you decide to follow him.

──────────────────

It all happened so fast.

Merle had been arguing with a few men over God knows what, and the scumbags hadn’t reacted well to you and Daryl showing up. One thing lead to another and, after the older Dixon shot one of them, an all-out brawl was taking place-- two versus two, a fair fight.

But the guy fighting Daryl had the upper hand, and his brother was too busy pummeling a guy to death with the leg of a chair to notice.

You don’t even really remember pulling the trigger.

“Oh-- my god.” You whisper, holding the gun out from your body. “Oh my god!”

Stumbling slightly, his nose bloody, Daryl makes his way to you, gently taking the gun.

“Y/n-”

“I thought he was gonna kill you-”

“Y/n-”

“You should’ve seen it-”

“Y/n!” You stop talking, and Daryl holds your face in his bloody hands. “Are you alrigh’?!”

You nod dumbly, and his shoulders don’t look so tense anymore.

──────────────────

Merle’s motorbike has a special sticker on it. When he rides by on it, you turn from the window to give Daryl a ‘what the fuck’ look.

He snorts again.

──────────────────

You guys stop to set camp in the forests just outside Atlanta and Merle stops you from helping set up-- Daryl forbids you two from talking to each other.

They give you a gun and tell you they’re going to be in the area, hunting for whatever they can find.

When they come back with rabbit, you make a face, and Merle is quick to mock.

“Look at your majesty, bitchin’ and moanin’ ‘cause they don’t get what they want.” 

Daryl tells him to fuck off and makes a mental note to look for squirrels more often.

──────────────────

After a few days of moving around the swarmed city, they found something that piqued their interest. A quarry.

You’ve been driving for forever now, going just slightly uphill for the last mile or so. Bored out of your mind, you’ve resigned to looking down out the window at the water, slumped against the door-- and then you see it.

“Daryl, look!”

At the top of the hill seems to be a camp. There’s an RV and a line of other cars, people scattered about, and a few tents a bit behind them; a big man with dark hair pulls a gun on your approaching party and Daryl stops the truck, Merle stopping the motorbike just in front of it.

“Stay here,” Daryl mutters, getting out.

You make brief eye contact with the burly man as both Dixon brothers approach him, their hands up.

They talk, but you can’t hear what they’re saying. More people emerge from the camp to see what the commotion is, women and children and even an old man.

Your heart swells.

The man points to you, his eyebrow cocked as he says something. Both brothers turn to look, but Daryl is the only one who returns to you.

“They’re gonna let us stay-- all of us.” He says quickly and quietly, as he opens the door. “I think he just wants to know we ain’t kidnap you or somethin’.”

He helps you out of the truck and closes it behind you, flanking you as you walk all the way up to Merle and the man.

“-- and this is Y/n Y/l/n. They’re a pain in the ass, but they’re good at foragin’” Merle claps a hand on your shoulder and you do your best not to scowl at him. “Been with my dear brother since shit hit the fan.”

The man turns to you and grins a bit. “Well, Y/n, I’m Shane Walsh.” 

He turns back to the brothers after you shake his hand.

“You three can get your stuff settled, find a spot in this mess. In a bit, when the sun goes down, we’re goin’ to start a fire, eat a meal together-- y’all are invited to join us.”

Shane doesn’t miss the way you perk up at that-- excited by the prospect of a meal and of actual conversation-- and he winks playfully before he returns to his people, likely to inform them.

You’re still smiling when your share of stuff is shoved in your hands and you’re dragged off to find a good spot to set yourselves up.

Somehow, you convince the brothers to take up Shane’s offer.

──────────────────

That night, after beer and food have gone around, Daryl launches into his story about the Chupacabra.

You’ve already heard it once or twice and, between your full stomach and the heat of the fire, your eyes are having a hard time staying open. Subconsciously, you lean into your favorite Dixon and he automatically, still telling his story, lifts his arm to wrap around you; you fall asleep like that, even as a hushed argument over the accuracy of the tale erupts around you.

At some point, Daryl looks down at you and realizes what’s happened.

If he decides to follow Merle’s plans, he could just leave you here with these people. They already like you, they’re capable, and they function well-- it’s everything Jess wanted for you back when they stumbled into their cabin and saw you, curled up in the corner and shaking, an orphan covered in blood.

You cuddle closer to him in your sleep, snoring softly, and he holds you tighter.

Yeah, he’s not letting you go

[thatsmellofrain]

🌩 astrology observations 🌩

because someday i had to hop on the bandwagon after reading them for so long.

DISCLAIMER: these observations all come from personal experience, i am no professional astrologer, only take what resonates!

☁️ venus in the cancer-capricorn axis are so damn underrated. i swear, these people are the ultimate providers in relationships, and they'll always be there for you when you need it, true ride or die energy with these people.

☁️ i can never realize someone's a pisces rising until they show me their chart. pisces in general tends to be very flowy and adaptable, so it may be more natural for these risings to blend in with the crowd.  h o w e v e r , their eyes might be a good giveaway. they tend to have an overall soft, watery look even if they're not blue (examples: billie eilish, michael jackson, zayn malik).

☁️ speaking of pisces placements, i've noticed most of the ones i know have shown deep interest in different artistic pursuits, specially songwriting, poetry, photography and film.

☁️ the same goes for leos but with them (and i say these as someone who attracts way too much leo energy) it's more related to performing arts. the ones i've seen more interested in writing also had a virgo mercury.

☁️ i've never seen two capricorns have a peaceful relationship with their parents, there's always one of them who prefers not to talk about it.

☁️ besides, i've seen that you're not "supposed" to get along with signs inconjunct (that make an angle of 150°, or are five signs away from yours) yours, since the inconjunction/quincunx is an aspect of total misunderstanding. however, i find signs like gemini and leo way too prominent on most of my friends' charts. maybe it's because i am a fire dominant as well so i tend to enjoy having fire and air energy all around me, but... i disagree with "textbook" astrology on this particular take. if leos and geminis bring me discord, i want more of it.

☁️ this is a popular one, but stop with the oversexualization of scorpio placements. the scorpio archetype has to do with many more things such as discoveries, taboo, mystery, emotional depth, secrets, the unknown, looking deep within ourselves, psychology. it is also related to sexuality, but... chill out on that aspect, please.

☁️ aquarius placements culture is saying: "i did x before it was popular". and i am directing this towards most of gen z because we all have at least one generational planet in there (could be uranus, neptune or both -i have both). if they're personal planets, of course the effect is even more intense.

☁️ the sagittarius-gemini axis gets the best ranter award, i swear i could hear these guys talk for hours.

☁️ can some people stop stereotyping sag and gemini venuses as cheaters? as a sag venus, i do tend to get bored easily, but that doesn't mean i'll cheat, i just need someone who can keep up with a great amount of energy and my random rants at 1am about useless topics.

☁️ look at the top students in your class, they probably have an earth or air mercury since those are the elements where mercury's the most comfortable in. that doesn't mean that if you have a water/fire mercury you're dumb, by the way, it's just that communication may not be as effective and striaghtforward, with cold hard facts.

☁️ people with aquarius in personal planets can go from "fashion icon" to "wtf were you thinking??" way too fast. but you guys, just like your sister sign leo, certainly do not go unnoticed.

☁️ i have come to the conclusion that the most intense energy belongs to fixed signs. i can feel those folks from a mile away. i've also been living in a fixed dominant family my whole life, so i have experience with them in general.

☁️ speaking of fixed signs, i'd like to add that not only tauruses are the monarchs of stubbornness, but the entire fixed mode can have that characteristic as well. of course, it depends of the entire chart, but when i encounter someone who's a fixed dominant and they disagree with me on something, even though i'm right, i just let them be for a while. they probably won't admit you were right and might act like it was their idea all along, though.

☁️ you may tend to enjoy music made by people who have personal placements landing on your fifth house. for example, i am an aries rising, so my 5H lands in leo, sign that many of my favorite artists have as their big three (rina sawayama, woodz, phoebe bridgers and jesse rutherford are leo suns; jungkook and heize are leo moons). also pay attention to the signs in your 8H and 12H along with your venus sign, your faves could have important placements in those.

☁️ fire risings all radiate main characte, given that the houses are all in the elements they are the most comortable in (the 1st is in a fire sign, the 2nd in earth, the 3rd in air, 4th in water, etc.). and in the case of aries risings, we have all our houses "in order".

☁️ people tend to stereotype aries placements as the ones with anger issues (when we're just being passionate, btw 🙄), but... have you guys seen a taurus? specifically a taurus mars? they'll raise hell if you cross the limits of their patience.

☁️ fire dominant culture is being told you're being "too much" at least once a week...

☁️ it's so fun to see my mom and i pick a destination to go to because you can literally see our venus signs in action. she, a taurus venus, is always talking about how much she wants to go somewhere she can be comfortable, in a resort with beautiful views to the coast. on the contrary there's me, a sagittarius venus, who would much rather get lost in a city, exploring and learning and moving all the time because that's how restless i am. i just can't imagine paying so much just to be locked up in a hotel, you know? i need to go places.

☁️ moon in the 6H people deserve an award for being the underrated mom friends we all need -they'll call you out on your bs right away, specially if they have strong aries energy.

thank you guys for reading! i might post more of these soon.

[smhalltheurlsaretaken]

Sorry but what exactly is up with the bad batch arc? I've heard people talk about the issues with echo's white skin but I haven't heard that many bad things about the arc itself? (ik you said you don't want to be negative on your blog so I would absolutely understand if you didn't answer this ask)

Oooooooooooh boy. Well I just had a long, long, LONG rant about it with someone, but I guess I’ve got an excuse to put all of my points onto a post and talk about it publicly now that I got an ask x) I’ll keep it under the cut so I don’t throw my salt in people’s face. I really don’t want to upset people who love that arc - it has redeeming qualities, but overall it pisses me off so much for so many reasons. So here:

The first issue is obviously two members of the Bad Batch (minus Echo) being being just about the furthest thing from maori no matter how much you're willing to stretch it. 

Like... yeah, nah. I wouldn’t even accept Crosshair and Tech (grey haired guy and goggles guy) as Jango’s natural biological sons, nevermind as his clones. 

The problem is that their different appearances are justified by them being described simply as clones with desirable mutations (i.e superpowers). But why the hell did the creators have to change their appearances for that to be a thing? How does that correlate? Sure, the concept of clones with different faces is interesting, except... no, no it’s not, and I’m gonna rant about it in a few secs. But basically it's like they thought giving them different faces would be a good substitute for having different personalities (another thing I’ll come back to). If they really wanted to have buff clones with super eyesight or whatnot they could have just done that, without making them lose what little melanin the lighting of the show had allowed the other Clones to keep. 

But the gigantic problem is... showing that the "regular" clones have VERY distinct identities despite their identical faces has been one of the themes of the show from episode 1. Literally, the first episode of TCW has Yoda taking time out of a mission with galactic stakes to tell the three clones he’s with (who tell him they’re all the same because they have the same faces) that they’re wrong, and that they’re very different in the Force, that their appearance doesn’t matter, that they’re all equally unique and important, and he lists all of their individual skills, strengths and weaknesses. 

And it’s not just me being bothered by that, here’s a post by @cacodaemonia​ saying the same thing. 

Introducing the Bad Batch as "unique" clones who are "different" and "not like their brothers" because they have different faces and skills completely breaks that theme of the show!! Because the entire point of the Clones in TCW is that their faces don't matter, they ARE unique! 

(Plus the Bad Batch’s character designs are so cliche and uninspired it’s just laughable to try and justify bleaching their freaking skin for the sake of visual diversity. 

This took like 10 seconds. I found the first guy by literally googling “soldier movies,” and the other two are Team Fortress characters that look a LOT like Wrecker and Crosshair. One is “Heavy” and one is “Sniper” lmao.

And behold:

The above picture is a Team Fortress reference that I found just by looking up “bad batch clone wars,” so I’m not the only person who sees it.) 

And the batchers don't even have personalities to justify calling them unique! They have no character traits beyond the most cliché american soldier tropes ever. We have a token loner sniper, a token "smart tech guy" who knows everything from xenoanthropology to biology to Separatist computers to sound waves to encryption, a token Badass Brooding Leader and a token “dumb muscle guy.”

I dare anyone to find more about their personalities than this: - Crosshair is the perpetually grumpy sniper who looks down on "regs,” - Wrecker likes to blow up stuff and doesn't like heights, - Hunter is the leader and is friends with Cody, - Tech is smart doesn't trust Echo. 

That’s it, that’s literally it. Four episodes about them and that's all we get. These character tropes are literally the least inventive ever. FFS, Hunter even has a freaking KNIFE! Not a vibroblade, mind you, like in kriffing Star Wars. A knife. Against metal droids. Why. They couldn’t make this more of an american-war-movies cliché fest if they tried. (And sure, he can feel electromagnetic waves so maybe it does make sense for him not to carry a vibroblade and maybe this is nitpicking, but he looks like a ripoff of a Predator character and it pisses me off).

Another thing is that when you introduce characters you have to make them likable - and them despising the normal Clones is a terrible way to do that! And they don't even grow from that because at the end of the 4 episodes arc they just see Rex as not bad "for a reg" and they see Echo as no longer a reg, and both of these things are infuriating! 

The worst thing imo is that Echo then becomes part of them (and irreparably loses his melanin in the process, uuuuuuuuugh) when there is nothing to justify this. 

The dialogue goes like this: 

ECHO: You coming? TECH: Not really our thing. CROSSHAIR: Accolades. WRECKER: Yeah, we're just in it for the thrill. Yo! HUNTER: You sure it's your thing? ECHO: What do you mean? HUNTER: Your path is different. Like ours. If you ever feel like you don't fit in with them, well, find us. (they leave) REX: Those are some of the finest troopers I've ever fought alongside. Echo. You and I go way back. If that's where you feel your place is, then that's where you belong.

Echo doesn't feel like he belongs anymore, okay, but why would he feel like he belongs with the assholes who up to the last five minutes of the mission thought he was probably a traitor, and also verbally expressed that he was not worth saving?? In all of the arc, Echo himself never voices that he feels he’s not ‘like the other Clones’ anymore and that he feels it’s a problem. His relationship with Rex immediately picks up where they left things off - the first thing he does upon being lucid again for the first in over a year is cracking a joke for Rex’s benefit. 

Why would Echo feel like he doesn’t belong in the 501st anymore, when we don't even see him interacting with anyone from his past life except for Rex and Anakin (who are both extremely very supportive of him)?? If there had been one scene of a “regular” Clone (ugh) looking at him with horror and disgust or something, or just Kix and Jesse cracking jokes with Echo awkwardly standing by the side not getting it, I could forgive the show trying to make it feel like he has an identity crisis, but this was so shallow!

The only thing that makes Echo and the Bad Batch’s experiences similar is that they *look* different. It’s so against the themes of the Clones I’m seething just from thinking about it. And what the hell? Echo ALREADY didn’t fit in. That was the WHOLE POINT of Domino Squad. They didn’t fit in because they thought they were better than anyone else because they had trouble getting along with their brothers, so obviously it had to be their brothers’ fault (ahem, Bad Batch?). And you know what happened? Domino Squad OVERCAME that. And Echo and Fives still didn’t “fit in” because their personalities were unique and creative, and they became ARC Troopers because Cody, Rex and the Jedi VALUED THEM FOR PRECISELY THAT. Echo having new and unique skills and a modified appearance is the most bs justification for him feeling like he doesn’t belong!! 

And that brings me to my biggest issue: Rex telling Echo the bad batch are some of the best troopers he's ever met. I'm sorry, based on WHAT? What Rex values above everything is loyalty and brotherhood, and the Bad Batch DOESN'T DISPLAY ANY OF THAT. We never see them even expressing concern for each other! Wrecker treats saving Cody’s life like a trivial issue, because it’s just ‘sO eAsY’ for him, and beyond that we never see them supporting each other or genuinely expressing affection for each other beyond boasting about each other’s skills... 

Sure they can destroy a lot of droids, but they're dismissive of Rex's brothers, and the entire Umbara arc and this arc showed what he thought of that. They keep saying things like "not bad for a reg,” don't show any trust in Rex's skills or experience (even though they can't have been fighting in the war for more than a year and a half when he’s been there from the beginning, and he outranks all of them), they are essentially guerilla fighters which has only minimal value in a galactic war, and they never grow beyond their views of what regs are, and can and can’t do. 

None of that should make them good troopers in Rex's book. Going back to Echo not fitting in, remember who taught the Domino Squad the importance of seeing all of your brothers as important and equally valuable? Shaak Ti, true, but more importantly? 99! The guy the Bad Batch are named after. He did have value and was important and was no less of a trooper than his brothers, even though his mutations made him LESS powerful, not more. (And btw, just from a writing standpoint, the batchers don’t have any weaknesses, which is shit.) Cody and Rex mourned 99 as a true soldier even though it wasn’t his sacrifice that brought them victory (which would have implied that he had value as a soldier and a brother because he saved them, as opposed to him having that value intrinsically), because that’s what a fine trooper is to them. A BROTHER first a foremost, someone altruistic, brave and loyal. The Bad Batch distort the meaning of 99's character with their behavior. They’re not altruistic, their bravery is mitigated by the fact that they’re freaking invincible, so of course they take risks (again, see Wrecker saving Cody without a care because it’s easy to him, as opposed to Rex being ready to run into a burning ship about to explode because his brother is in there, and having to be physically dragged away). The Bad Batch denigrate their brothers for being less skilled, thinking their own abilities make them unique somehow, when 99 could barely fight and was still the one who taught Hevy about being a good soldier. 

And again the batchers don't grow from that. Which is all the more frustrating because the original ending didn’t have Echo joining them, from what I remember of the unfinished episodes, and the arc actually ended with them receiving their medals in front of regular troopers who cheer for them, as opposed to them smugly ostracizing themselves and dismissing the ceremony as trivial and meaningless. (original ending vs s7 ending: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ab1eCfzKamw) 

It’s so annoying. Do you know what characters never had an entire arc dedicated to them and still have far more personality and more interesting designs and more symbolic weight?? 

Jesse, for starters. Kix. Dogma. Cut. Slick. Keeli. Ponds. Rys, Jek and Thire. Commander Doom. Commander Fox. Wolffe. Hevy. Hardcase. 

Cody was a more interesting character just in his RotS appearances. 

Waxer and Boil had one episode about them and then only two cameos plus Waxer’s death, and they’re still some of the most memorable, beloved Clones of the whole show. And Boil was grouchy and prejudiced like Crosshair, but he has so much growth that we could make a whole thread about it. 

I'd say the last problem with the Bad Batch is that it has cash grabbing money hungry vibes. Different faces are more marketable, cliché personalities are more toy-friendly, and it's basically a big ad for the Bad Batch series. And they throw Echo in the Batch at the end for bs reasons (again, it wasn’t in the original ep from what I remember) and they tease Cody in the show to make sure fans will still watch even if they notice the lack of soul. And less melanin sells more at Disney apparently. 

So that’s my whole pissed rant. 

[darthwheezely]

okay im backkkkk 💌 anything kinda angsty for fred pls (like a break up but theres a bit of making up at the end pls

resentment and reconciliation- f.w. hcs

Warnings: this one kinda hurt to write I’m ngl, I love you Jess but DAMN - cussing probably, mentions of slut shaming, actual smut, a lOT OF ANGST, hateful!fred

THIS WILL BE SO UNGODLY LONG THIS IS BASICALLY A PSUEDO ONE SHOT

people that might like this(?): @whiz-bangs78 @vogueweasley @theweasleyslut @loony-loopy-lupinn @lupinsclassroom @vivianweasley @oh-for-merlins-sake @kitwalker02 @tatesimper @gcdric @slytherinsunrise @lumosandnoxwriting

you and Fred were friends...

...simply friends

yep

mhm

only friends

friends that liked to casually dominate each other multiple times a week

sometimes multiple times a day

but regardless of your entirely messy relationship, you were best friends

...weren’t you?

“Fuck, Y/N, you’re so goddamn tight me,” Fred hissed as he was pounding inside of you, determined to release some kind of frustration from seeing you with George for the whole day when you both knew you had really just wanted to spend the day with Fred. Right?

“Freddie, you feel so good” you said airily as he hiked up one of your legs onto one of his shoulders.

“Yeah, princess? You like the way I fill you up so good, make you fucking mine?” When you moaned in response he threw your other leg onto the opposite shoulder, determined to show you just how much you were his, and what that meant for him. He had been watching you for months pretend nothing was happening outside this room, and regardless if you knew it or not, it had been killing him the day he agreed to your rendezvous the first time.

“Yes, Freddie, fuck, yes”

“Gonna come for me, sweet girl?”

“God, yes, Fred-“ and with a harsh thrust to your g-spot you clenched around him tightly, your body releasing onto him in a massive wave. He put his free hand that didn’t have your arms pinned above you to your clit, determined to have you as overstimulated as possible.

“Fred, please-“ you whined vehemently at his rough touch.

“I’m coming baby, I’m right here” and with a final pound he had smoothed your walls with him, the throbbing finally subsiding. He rolled his hips slowly to ride out his high, and he then pulled out, falling to your side and pulling you into his arms. He could feel your heart pounding as your breasts heaved against him, desperate for air flow where he had rid you of it all.

“We haven’t held each other like this in a while, Freddie...it’s...it’s really nice.” You whispered against his bare chest, pressing a kiss or two there. He nodded and buried his mouth in your hair, fluttering his eyes.

“I promise I’ll take every opportunity to hold you, okay?”

that was tuesday

let’s skip to Thursday morning

you had only told one other person about your complicated relationship with Fred, and that was Hannah Abbot

you trusted her, you saw her as your BEST friend

but unfortunately, good ol’ hannah didn’t really feel the same

she had it out for you when Roger Davies had confessed he had a crush on you at the Yule Ball, kissed you even, against your consent

see, he was Hannah’s date

and she didn’t like that very much

to top it allllll off?

she had been casually crushing on Fred ever since she had her heart broken by Roger

so now here you all were, seventh year and you assumed as per usual that everything was fine

when clearly, unbeknownst to you

this bitch saw you six feet under

so Hannah did what she knew would hurt you the most

she told Roger :)

“Please he’s absolutely balls deep in love with her, but poor thing doesn’t know she’s using him for a roll in the sack.” Said Hannah, filing her nails in the courtyard. Roger looked at her absolutely dumbfounded.

“No, Y/N, isnt like that. And besides, Fred’s a good mate of mine and...She just wouldn’t do that to him. Feelings or not, she’s not one to use people.” He shook his head starting to get up from the tree he’d been leaning on.

“Well, she used you, didn’t she?” She purred demurely. He turned to look at her, jaw clenched.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He gritted out.

“She’s making him her personal whore, exactly like she did when she rejected you at the Ball...I mean...cmon, Rog. Don’t people deserve to know who she really is?”

everyone had heard the next day how Y/N was fucking Fred Weasley like an Olympic sport

and how he wasn’t the one coming out on top for the first time

at first he didn’t know what he did when he walked into the Great Hall to stares and whispers

George had tried to get him to go back to bed so he could bring him food

but fred demanded answers

and when he found out what it was

...he was crushed

You walked into the cascading staircase, bounding up the stairs. It was Thursday night, you and Fred’s night to be alone while George and Lee would be hanging out. You walked into the room to see Fred, throwing things onto his bed and looking angry and...hurt?

“Fred, what-what is all this?” He didn’t look at you, just continued to pick stuff up off the floor, and got one of your bras. He threw it at you.

“It’s all your shit, Y/N. Might as well help since this is the last time you’ll ever be in my room. Or around me again quite frankly.” He started to look down again and keep working but he heard you whimper and his eyes flashed up to yours. He started to laugh harshly. “Oh my god, stop.” He rolled his eyes and threw his arms out. “You got what you wanted from me didn’t you, Y/N? Quick shag and no feelings and knowing you had an entire fucking human being completely and utterly devoted to you with, what did Ron say? ‘Half the commitment’?” He smiled at you but it was one with rage, with tears pooling at his eyes, pain emitting off his body in hot waves. He didn’t even know he was shouting.

“I mean, Jesus, I’m in love with you and you got to go on and-and fuck whoever you want because guess what at the end of the day you get to tell everyone that Fred fucking Weasley is your own personal whore and would do anything for you and that just got you where you wanted it didn’t it? Didn’t it?” He had stopped yelling, his heart pounding as he took in the sight of you fully in tears now, flinching at him quietly. He felt immediately then like he was going to throw up, something wasn’t right, you usually were so fiery and assertive and here you were looking like a dog that got kicked repeatedly. He swallowed thickly. “Get your stuff and get the fuck out I can’t stand the sight of you.”

Without looking at him you reached onto his bed and grabbed everything you could carry, and swiftly left the room. Everyone in the Gryffindor common room, except George, looking at you with pure unbridled disdain.

George was the only it seemed, that cared about you at this time for the next couple weeks

He didn’t tell Fred, but it had been George that had been sneaking up food to you in your dorm room

It had been George that had sent you little notes in class that said things like

I love you, Y/N. I believe in you, okay?

He even visited your dorm one day when you couldn’t move so much as one leg off your bed, and he caught you then, while you were sobbing about the loss of Fred and yourself and he held you and put you back in bed

and waited until you fell back asleep and moved the hair out of your face

he needed to tell Fred the truth

meanwhile, Fred was floundering

he had fallen back into his coping mechanism of sex and violence, mostly the first one

he had started hooking up with virtually everyone in his year that he’d ever rejected

after all - fred was labeled as a slut so why not act like one

if there was anything Fred was good at, it was being loud

in bed it had never been an issue - in fact, it was a talent now, yeah?

he’d been hearing it around school for weeks now

how easy he was

how much he would do to get in a girl’s pants

how he dipped his wick in anything that moved

anything and everything

he got it from girls

“c’mon freddie can i take a ride just once”

to the guys

“Oi freddie, you let your mates hit it for free too?”

if it were from a guy he’d usually swing a punch

or 12

he’d gotten in his most fights that he ever had in any of his years at hogwarts

but then Georgie came along:

George had waited on Fred’s bed, as his twin was in the shower. Lucky for Fred, George had been able to trace Roger’s little dip in the gossip system all the way back to Hannah Abbott, who everyone knew was bullshit, and had decided to let his brother know exactly what kind of a supreme asshat he was being to their best friend (and the love of Fred’s life, let’s be super honest.)

“Georgie, what the hell are you doing-”

“About to give you the whip cracking of your life, dear brother.” George swung his legs off the bed as Fred continued to dry his hair in the mirror, rolling his eyes.

“Is this about the last girl I had by? We didn’t fuck on your bed if that’s what you’re so worried about.” Fred quipped and George took everything in his power to not bitch slap the hell out of his older twin. George clenched his jaw and rolled it.

“You fucked up, Freddie.” He said quietly. Fred turned slowly to look at him. “Excuse me?”. “You. Fucked. Up.” George said a bit louder. “Y/N got played. By Hannah Abbott and Roger Davies. She’s had a crush on you this whole time, you absolute dumb piece of shit.” And then George did push Fred then backwards onto the bathroom wall, but he was too dumbfounded by the usually sensible twin’s behavior to do anything back.

“That’s-I don’t understand-“

“Oh my god, Fred. Hannah’s been in love with for ages, she lied. To everyone. Roger did too, he’s wanted to get with Y/N since day 1 you know that just as well as I do.” Fred tightened his arm, thinking about Roger with his lips and arms on you that night last year-

“Your point? She still said that shit about me” he said gruffly, but a pool of anxiety swirled in his stomach all the same

“Don’t you get it? Y/N is in love with you. She didn’t say or do anything to hurt you. At all. She hasn’t been eating, she hasn’t been doing homework, she throws up constantly, she’s barely left bed but to go to the library and usually all she does there is sleep anyway, she cries all the time and it’s been me making sure she still is present if not to just see people every damn day! So quit youre moping and fix this shit or I swear to God, Freddie, I’ll knock your block off.” George was heaving, pools of water in his eyes as he swallowed. “She’s my best friend too, you know.”

Fred looked up at George then and had started to cry. All of those things he said, all of the words he spat at her like they could burn her skin and cause some of the pain he believed she had caused him, when in reality you had-you had done nothing wrong.

“Georgie, I’m sorry” he choked.

“I know you are. But I’m not the one to say it to right now...you’ve gotta find her, Freddie. Please.”

you had been in the corner of the quidditch stands

the wind was blowing against your hair

you couldn’t be in your room anymore, it started to smell like you

and you, prior to an hour ago, didn’t smell too appetizing

you reeked of sweat and tears and your own sick

you took a shower so hot you wanted it to burn you alive

maybe sanitize the last of your fear and your hurt away

you had lost weight, you had lost feeling

you all in all had just lost

and you had never wanted to go home so badly, already considering writing home

you hated being reminded that your best friend and crush hated you

wanted you to be hated by everyone else too

but then, you heard footsteps

“Y/N?” Fred whispered to himself as he saw you in the stands. You looked so worn, so lifeless sitting there - he almost didn’t recognize you from the way your hair, usually scrunched up and bouncy had fallen flatly against your face, further slapped around by the wind outside. You had been wearing an oversized sweater and your sweatpants had pooled around your ankles. Simply put, you were miserable. 

“Y/N?” He called again once he was standing in front of you. You turned to look at him in what felt like slow motion, but when you locked eyes with him, you immediately felt fearful. 

“I-I’m sorry, I’ll leave now” you sputtered

“No, hey, wait, please” he reached out to grab your arm and you froze, letting him take it. He looked at you, with a flash of fear and worry on your face and he wanted to throw up knowing he was the one that made you feel like that.

“Fred, please let go” you hoarsely whispered.

“No, love, I’m not going to let go I have some things to apologize for.”

You started to cry, eyes dropping again to his hand on your arm and breathing feeling suddenly like a very hard task. “You hate me now: you sobbed and you pulled yourself from his grip, turning away from him and gathering your bag. He started to scramble for your hold again tears starting to stream down his face

“No, angel, please, I could never hate you”

“Oh? What about those things you said to me in your room-” you were walking faster over the benched seats, making your way to the other side.

“I know I know I said those things in my room but I can’t believe them because you have to believe me when I tell you I’m in love with you” and he was sobbing at your body turned away from him. You turned to look at him with a skeptical quirk of your face.

“No, no you don’t.” You spat.

“Yes, Y/N, I do please let me explain” he said earnestly taking in your bright eyes and the furrow of your brow.

“People who love each other don’t scream at them and throw things.” You said flatly. You wanted him to be true but you couldn’t make yourself believe him.

“Just give me five minutes of your time and-and if you hate me you never have to see me again. Please.” He closed the gap between you two and motioned for you to sit down. You licked a tear from your lip and nodded siting on a bench besides him.

“Hannah and Roger told everyone-”

“I know what happened. What they did. I want to hear about you. And what you said. And are saying” you looked at him in the eyes with steel burning behind your irises.

He sighed and rubbed his jaw. “I thought that what we had was purely sex in your eyes. And I was too much of a coward to ever ask you, so when I heard someone tell me that my own insecurities could possibly be true,” he inhaled a harsh breath as tears started to fall “I-I was crushed. By the idea that you saw me as what other people saw me as...as a toy? I guess? Or a sexual prop? To use when you wanted. But I hide my feelings a lot as you know, so even if you did feel that way, it would’ve looked like I agreed because I hate you knowing how sad I am,” he started to choke on his tears, the anguish of knowing he hurt you this much was too much for him to ever be able to handle. “I just wanted to hold you and whisper in your ear and tell you how much I love you and the thought of my own fears being true pushed you away. And you never have to forgive me. I-when I yelled at you like that I wanted to see you hurt, I think. I wanted you to see how sad it made me to think about you with other people like you had been with me and” he took a final breath and you pulled his body into you. “Y/N, my love I’m so sorry.” His sobs shook your body, the feeling and angle of the destroyed boy you love shaking you everywhere. You pressed kisses to his head. “Freddie, I love you” you repeated “I love you here and here and here and here and here” and with every kiss you gave him, you were determined to soothe him. “I-I’ sorry too, for not being as forthright with you about how i felt too. It’s always been you, Freddie.” He choked out a watery smile and he leaned in to kiss your face everywhere he could, his tears stinging against the wind and your cheeks. 

“If-If you could ever be with me I will always be open to it at any time, you know that don’t you? I-I understand if you can’t.” He held his forehead to yours, his nose brushing yours ever so slightly. 

“Freddie, I love you. You were who I missed when I couldn’t get out of bed for fuck’s sake you’re all I want,” and he leaned into you then fully, capturing your wet and chapped lips against his. Your arms wrapped around his neck and he melted into you like this

this

this was fred weasley

[deadbiwrites]

a video of supergirl grabbing lena luthor's ass starts circulating and it's very embarrassing for sc but extremely funny to their friends

(I am SO sorry. Where do these hide? Why do I never see them? How long has this been here?!

Anyways, have some cute nonsense!)

The day starts like any other, honestly.

Like, sure, Kara’s never thrilled when she wakes up 20 minutes late and has to use superspeed to get through her morning routine and into the office on time, but it happens regularly enough that she’s just sort of used to it by now. Like, the sky is blue, the grass is green, she manages time poorly. Whatever.

But she does get to work on time, with just enough to spare that she can make a brief detour to Nia’s desk for the coffee her protege has already bought for her, thank her profusely (with perhaps minor promising of firstborn children), and slip into the morning meeting just as Snapper, James, and Lena start handing out assignments for the day.

“Well, well, good of you to join us, Ponytail. Let me guess, a family emergency kept you out all night again?”

‘I mean, that Abraxian wasn’t my family, technically, but someone’s family, so…’ “Something like that. Sorry.”

Lena catches her eye and quirks a brow in question, but Kara just shrugs easily and sips her coffee, pulling a silly face at her friend when Snapper’s attention moves away from her. When her eyes uncross, she can tell Lena is fighting not to laugh, eyes sparking with mirth as she bites her lip. Kara takes another sip of coffee, feeling a bit smug that she can get Lena to smile without even having to say anything to her. That’s real talent, right there.

Especially since Lena has to stand up at the front with James, who has been by turns cold, dejected, and surly toward her since their breakup (a big, real, final one) a few weeks prior. Lena had said that the whole thing was a mistake, that she should’ve never gone for it in the first place because she’d been right the first time- they’d had some chemistry, after all, but it certainly wasn’t compatible long-term. 

Which… Kara can certainly relate. Like, a lot.

Especially about the whole… James being kind of wounded about it part. That part had really sucked- when he’d done it with Kara, who he’d gone on like, a date with, it’d resulted in him deciding to become a vigilante. Rao only knows what he’ll do when it’s someone he dated on and off for over a year...

“Ponytail!”

Kara jumps, realizing too late that her wandering attention hasn’t gone unnoticed. “Yes, sir?”

Snapper rolls his eyes. “Great, now that you’ve stopped orbiting Saturn, you wanna go get that article started?”

Kara’s eyes widen slightly in a panic as she realizes that she has no idea what he’s talking about. “Uh…” Behind his back, Lena catches her eye and nods subtly. Thank Rao. “Yes. I super do.”

Lena snorts, James sighs deeply, and the meeting is adjourned.

**

“So what exactly am I supposed to be doing today?” Kara asks Lena as they stroll out of the conference room together.

“Well unfortunately for you, you have to interview a big-time CEO. You have a meeting scheduled with her in three hours.”

“You?” Kara asks hopefully.

“You’re very sweet,” Lena chuckles. “No, Elena Watts. She’s a real estate developer, and she runs a nonprofit organization for homeless youth. It’s one of the articles we’re doing for next month’s spread. Contrary to popular belief, Cat and I weren’t the only women with high-profile jobs in this city. ”

“Oh, that’s pretty cool! Have you met her?”

“Not personally, no, but I have donated to her charity- it’s a very good cause, especially the outreach they do with queer youth.”

Kara elbows Lena gently. “You’re such a softie.”

“Mmm, maybe. But if you tell anyone, you’re fired.”

Kara clutches a hand to her chest, feigning horror. “Why Miss Luthor, what a blatant abuse of power!”

Lena shrugs. “I’m a Luthor, darling, I have to keep up appearances somehow.”

“Ouch,” Kara laughs. “See you at lunch?”

“Only if lunch includes a milkshake- I have a teleconference with both boards today. Unless you feel like joining me?”

“Wow, well as fun as that sounds, I’m gonna go do literally anything else.” Her comms crackle to life, alerting her of a hostage situation downtown, and Kara sighs. So much for a work day. “Alright, well, I’m, um, gonna go… see what I can find on Elena Watts. Maybe over another cup of coffee at Noonan’s.” She widens her eyes a bit, trying her best to convey that she’s going to be on Super-duty for a little while.

Thankfully, Lena picks up on it and grins. “You just want sticky buns.”

“Lena, I always want sticky buns. They’re like, my second favorite thing to eat.”

“Oh? What’s the first?” Lena asks, voice just a bit lower than usual. 

Kara opens her mouth and closes it, flushing slightly as she averts her gaze and adjusts the laptop bag on her shoulder. Stuff like that has been happening more and more, and she’s not 100% sure what to do about it. Because on the one hand, it makes her stomach do flips and tie up in knots and makes her brain do this… staticky thing where nothing filters in or out, just a pleasant buzz of how funny and smart Lena is and how much Kara likes hanging out with her and being flirted with (because that’s definitely what’s been happening, even if neither of them is really ready to address it) and just generally looking at Lena.... who is currently biting her lip and grinning up at Kara, and that buzz makes her kinda dumb, which is just really unhelpful. But on the other hand, it’s also kinda awesome and Kara really enjoys it, and-

“Kara?”

She spaced out again. Crap.

“Um. What time are you free for lunch?”

Lena sighs, seeming slightly disappointed that Kara isn’t flirting back at the moment (and thank Rao Lena can’t read minds), but she smiles back easily enough as they step off of the elevator. “I should be done by two.”

Feeling emboldened, Kara turns so she’s walking backwards in front of Lena and grins. “It’s a date,” she says with a grin, ducking forward to press a quick “friendly” kiss high on Lena’s cheek. She whirls and jogs out the double doors, leaving Lena smiling exasperatedly after her.

**

It is genuinely baffling to Kara that people still commit crimes in National City. It’s not even an ego thing, really, since Kara tries to keep herself humble (even when she manages to wrap up a hostage situation within twenty seconds of arriving on-scene without injuring any of the criminals or damaging the building too badly). Like, yeah, she gets that there’s a certain element of crazies who just sorta gravitate to places with a local hero, the big-bads who have their own suits and geek-toys and abilities. Them, Kara gets. Kinda sorta. But the regular ones, who are armed with like, pistols? Or knives? Just regular man made stuff without even the benefit of magic or kryptonite or something?

Why? 

She’s sure that if she asked, Lena would have some sort of statistical thing about large cities and poverty and all sorts of other factors that would end up making Kara feel like a jerk for being uncharitable to the criminal element of her city, but at the moment she’s mostly too annoyed by the fact that she has to spend her weekdays chasing them around instead of chasing stories.

Once all the hostages are freed and the cops secure the scene, Kara departs, flying into the alley behind Noonan’s and changing into her regular clothes before she heads inside to do a bit of research before her meeting with Elena Watts in a few hours (just because she’d used it as a cover doesn’t mean it was a bad idea…). She finds her favorite little two-person booth tucked into a quiet corner, plugs in her laptop, and gets to work, asking the waitress to please keep both the coffee and the sticky buns coming.

She gets a surprising amount done by the time she needs to leave for the interview, having a good foundation for what she wants to write and who Elena Watts is.

Ms. Watts turns out to be a pretty nice lady around Eliza’s age, if a bit busy and distracted by the steady flow of people in and out of her office. She answers all Kara’s questions with aplomb, happy to elaborate on most every point and eager to draw attention to the rising issue of homelessness among children and teens in the US.

“When I was young, my dad lost his job at the auto plant. It was supposed to be a temporary layoff, but the factory never reopened. We ended up losing the house, and we lived so far from our extended family that staying with them wasn’t much of an option. We lived in our SUV for six months, sleeping at shelters every now and again, if we could find one that allowed families to stay together. We showered at the local YMCA. Five people and a dog, living and sleeping in an old station wagon- even now, it sounds ridiculous. Eventually, we got back on our feet, but I never forgot that. It was just six months, but it was- and remains- the scariest, most uncertain time in my entire life, and it shaped me in a lot of ways I didn’t expect. And there are kids and families who do that for years. I just want to help them the way I wish that someone had been able to help us.”

At the end of the interview, Kara thanks her profusely for her time and for sharing her story before hurrying off to CatCo to type up a draft for Snapper (“What’s wrong with you, Ponytail, why is everything you bring me sappy and sentimental?”), which she finishes an outline of just in time to send it off before running to Big Belly and L-Corp for lunch with Lena.

She greets the newest in a series of secretaries (Anna? Amy? Ava? Lena’s really missing Jess, these days, but from what she’s told Kara, Jess is kicking butt in her new role as VP of Operations and will probably take over for the COO when he retires in a few years), and the girl waves her in distractedly.

And that’s when Kara’s day goes from normal to not, because inside the office are two masked men holding a stone-faced Lena at gunpoint on her balcony and demanding… something, probably. Kara’s a bit distracted by the loaded gun aimed at Lena’s head.

“Hey!” she yells, attracting both their attention. They whirl on her and Lena’s eyes widen in alarm, and Kara suddenly realizes three things- 1) she’s in her Kara Danvers clothes, not the supersuit, 2) she can’t speed into the suit now that they’re both looking at her, and 3) she has no plan.

Crap.

“Who the hell are you?!” one of them demands.

Kara… doesn’t have a good or snappy answer for that, and instead does the only thing she can think of- she throws the large milkshakes she’s carrying at them as hard as she can.

Which, in retrospect, is too hard, apparently because while yes, it is both funny and gratifying to see two grown men get absolutely leveled by a tasty dairy treat to the face, the one closest to Lena manages to elbow her in such a way that she falls backwards over the rail with an instinctual scream that makes Kara’s heart fly into her throat. She whips off her glasses, and by the time she’s out the window and speeding toward Lena’s flailing form, the suit is materialized. She gets under Lena, catching her carefully and dropping a bit further before slowing down (because she’s been made aware that when she doesn’t, the people she’s saving may as well be hitting the pavement), finally coasting to a stop about 20 feet from the ground.

Lena’s face is screwed up in a forced sort of focus, her hands clutching tightly at Kara’s shoulders and cape as she holds her breath.

“Are you okay?” Kara asks quietly.

Lena swallows thickly and nods, eyes still firmly closed. “I’m alright. Thank you- I’ll admit, I wasn’t quite sure how to get out of that one.”

“What was that? What did they want?”

Lena cracks an eye open. “Oh. you know, just my quarterly assassination attempt. I think my mother was starting to miss me, so she wanted to reach out.”

Kara snorts. “That really shouldn’t be funny.”

“Maybe not, but here we are.” Lena shifts a bit in Kara’s arms, cheeks a bit flushed from the adrenaline rush, and clears her throat. “Not to be rude, Supergirl, but do you think that perhaps we could continue this conversation… on the ground?”

“Oh. Oh! Yeah, sorry. I forgot we were, uh, flying.”

Lena chuckles as they ascend slowly back up to her office. “You forgot you were flying?”

Kara shrugs with an easy smile. “I guess you have that effect on me.”

Lena huffs a laugh against Kara’s neck, eyes squeezed shut again. They alight on the balcony, finding the two men still unconscious, covered in Kara and Lena’s lunch. Lena sighs as Kara sets her down, pinching the bridge of her nose. “What a mess.”

“Yeah, sorry, I sorta… panicked.”  

“I was so looking forward to a milkshake too…” Lena laments playfully.

“Well, then I have good news and bad news,” Kara says. She reaches out and gently wipes a bit of her own chocolate shake from Lena’s cheek with the pad of her thumb, tucking it into her mouth on instinct to get a taste of it. “The good news is, you do, in fact, have some shake on you!”

“Whats the bad news?” 

“Also that you have some shake on you.” Kara laughs, gathering the two men in her arms and hefting them a bit so they’re easier to carry. “I’ll get you another one. Be right back.”

She drops the men at the police station with a brief explanation before flying back into the office. Lena hands over her discarded glasses with a wry grin.

“I figured you’d need these before the police arrive.” She’s putting on a brave front, but she’s clearly still more than a bit rattled, if her too-bright eyes and thundering heartbeat are anything to go by. Kara steps closer and opens her arms in invitation, and Lena doesn’t hesitate to step into them. “Thank you,” Lena says fervently, tucking her face into Kara’s shoulder and wrapping her arms tight around Kara’s waist. 

“Always,” Kara promises, daring to press a reassuring kiss to Lena’s temple (and getting a bit of Lena’s strawberry shake for her troubles) before wrapping her up even tighter in her arms. “Are you actually okay?”

“I mean, my fear of heights has been reaffirmed,” Lena jokes, “but aside from that, I’m not hurt.”

“Good. I don’t like, love people pointing guns at you. Just so you know.”

“I’m not a fan either, for the record,” Lena drawls, burrowing even closer. “Even though I know you’ll save me, it still puts a damper on my day.”

Kara huffs a laugh. “Same.”

They stay like that for a few minutes, until Lena’s calmed down enough to stop shaking and calls her assistant (Audra, apparently) in, telling her what’d happened and that the police would be arriving shortly to take her and Kara’s statements, and please advise the security team to let them up discreetly. After the cops arrive, it’s a blur of questions, and Kara has to concentrate on telling the story of how she’d panicked and thrown the milkshakes at the men, and one of them had knocked Lena over the balcony (all true), and Kara had yelled for Supergirl, who had knocked the men out on her way to Lena (also technically mostly true. Technically. Mostly.). The police are sure to tell Kara that next time, she shouldn’t throw things at people with guns, and also to tell them both how lucky they are that Supergirl had shown up when she did.

“She’s always there when I need her,” Lena agrees, throwing a sly wink over the officer’s shoulder at Kara.

Kara just shakes her head and smiles. Even almost dying isn’t enough to make Lena not flirt with her. The woman is truly a marvel.

Kara’s comms crackle again, accompanied by Alex’s custom ringtone on her cell, and after assuring the police that she has no issue with giving another statement if they need her to later, hurries over to the DEO (making a quick stop in the back alley to change into her suit).

**

When Kara arrives, she’s told that J’onn and Alex are waiting for her in the Directors’ offices. She makes her way there, waving to the agents and scientists she knows. But it’s very weird, because every time one of them sees her, they start giggling before quickly hurrying off in the opposite direction. Like, literally everyone is whispering and pointing and giggling, and it’s giving Kara such visceral flashbacks to high school that it’s all she can do to not check her cape for a taped on sign that says ‘Kick me’ or ‘Freak’.

(Kids are mean.)

By the time Kara gets to her destination, she’s fully paranoid, sure that someone’s playing a prank on her, somehow, and that everyone but her is in on the joke. She opens the door with more force than intended and catches it just before the handle puts a hole in the wall, throwing Alex and J’onn a sheepish smile. She closes the door extra gently and leans against it heavily. J’onn and Alex just stare at her, looking thoroughly unimpressed.

“Busy day, Supergirl?” Alex asks, and after half a lifetime of spending time with her, Kara recognizes that she, too, is trying not to laugh. 

Kara’s had enough. “Okay, do I have something on my face? Or on the suit? Is someone messing with me?”

J’onn’s brow furrows. “No.”

“Then what’s the deal? Why is the entire DEO like… laughing at me? Did someone accidentally vent the lab fumes out into the main hub again?”

“No.”

“Did someone see me crash into that billboard last week?”

J’onn’s frown deepens. “What?”

“No,” Alex answers.

“Then why is everyone laughing at me?!”

“I mean, if I had to guess, I’d say it’s because of that,” Alex muses, nodding toward the big TV on the wall beside Kara.

She steps back to watch the news coverage of her dealing with the hostage situation this morning and frowns. “What, those guys? That was routine, what’s so funny about tha-”

“No, no, not that. That,” Alex clarifies, cranking up the volume.

“...reports are saying that the CEO of L-Corp, Lena Luthor, experienced an attempt on her life early this afternoon. Sources claim that she fell from a considerable height-”

“Hey, she was pushed,” Kara corrects.

“Shh!”

“...caught by Supergirl, who may have gotten a little… familiar with her.”

And there’s a video (clearly recorded on a cell phone but not the worst quality Kara’s ever seen) of Kara catching Lena and slowing to a stop above the sidewalk, of them talking quietly, of Kara’s hand definitely on Lena’s-

“Oh. Oh no.”

“Oh yes,” Alex drawls, clicking the TV off with relish, a large, evil-big-sister grin spreading across her face. “Congratulations, Supergirl- the world just watched you grope Lena Luthor’s ass.”

“But I’m not- I wasn’t groping, I was catching! My hands weren’t… If it was groping, I’d be all up on her, and I wasn’t!”

“Camera begs to differ. It’s already trending on Twitter in National CIty.”

Kara puts her head in her hands and groans. “Why?! I was trying to save her!”

“You were definitely trying to save part of her,” Alex agrees. “Granted, it’s a very nice part...”

Kara’s head pops up, and she shoots Alex a look that’s between a pout and a glare. “You’re not helping.”

Alex feigns confusion. “Am I supposed to be helping?”

“Alright, enough,” J’onn cuts in before Kara can retort. “We just wanted you to be aware. I don’t think that this is going to be taken for anything more than it is- a humorous moment in the middle of a successful rescue. You shouldn’t worry about the press.”

And truth be told, Kara isn't worried about the press- she’s worried about the fact that she’s going to have to face Lena after this. Lena, who she knows for a fact has google alerts set for herself, Kara Danvers, and Supergirl, a gesture which is normally actually sweet and kind but is right now definitely gonna bite her in the-

“Okay! So, is that all?”

Alex blinks, looks over at J’onn, and shrugs. “I mean, yeah. Try not to make a habit of groping your crush when you’re in the suit.”

“I wasn’t groping her-”

Alex grins. “So you admit you have a crush? Interesting…”

“Alex!”

**

J’onn’s prediction is mostly right- no one seems to be taking the shots of her grabbi- saving Lena as anything other than a funny blip of a moment in their coverage of it.

He was wrong about the sheer scale. The clip had gone totally viral in a matter of hours, and seemingly every major network in the country has run the clip at least once as a bit of filler-fluff, and almost every major network anchor (including the ones at CatCo, the traitors) has made at least a passing joke about Supergirl being ‘Super-Handsy'.

Which means that Kara is very late getting back to Lena’s office with replacement food. But like, she’s been busy, okay? It’s not like she’s avoiding Lena, or something, because she’s embarrassed- which she isn’t, because she didn’t do anything bad or wrong and-

Anyways, it’s well past sunset by the time Kara gets to Lena’s office door again. She hesitates outside it for just a moment before shouldering the door open and knocking tentatively.

Lena’s attention jerks from whatever she’d been absorbed in to Kara, and a relieved smile blooms across her face. “Hey there.”

Kara finds herself equally relieved to not experience a repeat performance of earlier scary situations. “Hi,” Kara says, unable to resist smiling back. She raises the bags and cup carrier. “I bring grease and milkshakes. Again.”

“Oh thank god, I’m starving,” Lena says, rolling her chair away from her desk and rising into a deep and probably much-needed stretch. Kara very determinedly does not stare at the slight sliver of soft tummy that appears between her blouse and skirt at the motion. “I’ve been staring at this screen for several hours. And Sam called to yell at me- she says hello, by the way- she and Ruby are in town next weekend.”

“Good!” Kara crosses the room to the couch as Lena does, easily spreading out the veritable buffet of fast food she’d brought over the coffee table. “I mean, not good that she yelled at you, or that you’re still at work, Miss Luthor,” she says pointedly, receiving only an unapologetic shrug in response. “But good that, um-”

“I get it,” Lena chuckles, resting a hand lightly on Kara’s knee and boy, if that doesn’t make Kara’s brain go fuzzy and dumb again… “Thank you, for checking in.”

“Of course I was gonna check on you, Lena,” Kara huffs. “Plus, I know you probably didn’t get lunch, so…”

Lena hums around a mouthful of burger, chewing until she can politely speak again. “Well it’s delicious. Did you make it yourself?” she teases with a sly grin.

“Oh, yeah, totally. Slaved away over a hot stove for this- I just wrapped it in Big Belly wrappers so you wouldn’t feel bad about it.”

“Very clever.” Lena pops the lid off of her milkshake and drags a fry through it (an advanced culinary delicacy Kara had horrified her with initially but had eventually become a bit of a guilty pleasure). “Although I have to say, traditionally you’d have to buy me dinner before you grabbed my ass.”

Kara chokes on a pickle. “Oh no,” she groans, dropping the burger onto the wrapper on the table and dropping her very red face into her hands as Lena laughs beside her. She peers out from between her fingers. “I am so sorry, I was just worried about you hitting the pavement and like, catching you in the least jarring way and I wasn’t paying attention to where my hands were and I didn’t even notice until I got back to the DEO and-”

“Well I have so say, I feel a bit offended that you didn’t even realize you were copping a feel...” When the only response is another groan and a deep flush spreading from Kara’s neck to the tips of her ears, Lena relents. “Kara, Kara, it’s fine!” she laughs, pulling Kara’s hands away from her face and giving them a grounding squeeze. “Nia’s been sending me memes about it all day, which has improved my mood significantly. On the grand scale of fallout from assassination attempts, this one was at least funny.”

“I know that’s supposed to be comforting, but all it makes me wanna do is wrap you in bubble wrap forever,” Kara informs her.

“Pass on that. But seriously, don’t worry about it- I know it wasn’t on purpose- unfortunately for me, you’re too noble to do something like that,” Lena laments playfully.

And whether it’s the knowledge that Lena is not, in fact, upset, the overall weirdness that has been this day, or this delicious burger fueling it, Kara feels a bit emboldened. “Hey Lena…”

“Yes?”

“What if I wanted to grab your butt? Just, y’know, as a hypothetical. For future reference.”

Lena quirks a brow at her, fighting a smile as she contemplates this. “Hmm. Strictly hypothetically?”

Kara scoots a bit closer on the couch. “Sure.”

 “Well, you’ve already bought me dinner…”

“And lunch, technically. Even if I gave it to the bad guys.”

“True. Plus you saved my life, so that gets you some points, probably.”

Kara pauses in her sly scooching. “Oh, hey, wait, no, that’s not-” 

“Kidding, Kara. I know you’d never use that to your advantage. I, however, have determined that strong moral fibre and nobility do, in fact, earn you more points, which is my choice on the matter and you get absolutely no say in it.”

“Oh. Um, alright, I think.”

Lena stares off into the middle distance, tapping her forefinger thoughtfully against her chin. Finally she shrugs. “Yes, I think you’re fulfilled the prerequisites for a bit of grab-ass today.”

Kara snorts, Lena laughs, and soon enough Kara takes her up on the offer.

**

“Hey Kara, remember that time you grabbed Lena’s ass and it made international news?” Nia asks around a mouthful of mushu pork.

“You mean last week? Yes, I remember,” Kara drawls. Beside her/halfway sitting on her lap, Lena snorts.

“That was the best.”

Alex glares. “Um, excuse you, no. No it was not. I had to sift through so much thirsting over my sister on like, every social media platform. It was the worst day of my life.”

Brainy’s brow furrows. “Surely that cannot be correct, Alex. Statistically speaking-”

Alex holds up a hand, cutting him off. “Trauma can’t be measured, Brainy.”

Kelly chuckles and presses a consoling kiss to Alex’s cheek, and it makes the tough agent melt into a doe-eyed puddle of mush that Kara snorts. And she says they’re gross... Kara sneaks a glance at Lena from the corner of her eye, and she catches Lena looking at her. She leans close and jostles her gently as she drops her head onto Lena’ shoulder. “We’re never gonna live that down, are we?”

“Probably not.”

“We have the worst friends.” When this elicits nothing but a chuckle, Kara tips her head back to see Lena still looking at her, a soft smile playing at her mouth and shining in her eyes. And like, this whole thing they’re doing is new, with the kissing and the actual dates and the... everything else. But the thing where Kara catches Lena looking at her and she doesn’t look away? That freakin’ knocks her out, every single time. “Hey,” she manages.

Lena grins down at her. “Hi.”

So yeah. Maybe the initial circumstances weren’t ideal, and she doesn’t love the mockery that’s been heaped upon her by all of her friends and loved ones (including Winn, who’d sent a missive from the future that literally just said ‘LOL’). But the fact is, Kara muses as she surges up just enough to kiss the corner of Lena’s mouth, that she doesn’t regret a thing.

[sortasirius]

what makes you think the writers want deancas? not trying to be an asshole, i'm just genuinely curious as to why you think that. i know berens' episodes are pretty heavy with subtext so i can see why you'd say that he wants it, but i'm not so sure about the rest of the writers/dabb. it seems like meghan isn't a huge fan either, given her "they twisted it so fast" tweet :/ of course she's a very new writer (think she's only writing one ep this season?) but still

OKAY this is a great question, welcome to my dissertation.

I’m going to address the end of your question first. Meghan is actually DeanCas positive, she has been for quite a long time. She actually, a few years back, posted a picture of her reading a literal book about Destiel and captioned it “writing reading” or something like that.

This whole thing just comes out of a boiling over of tensions because of how nasty fandom twitter can be. Like I said here, I think this has just gotten blown out of proportion, they shouldn’t have posted all this randomly disparaging stuff, but also like...can you blame them? The fandom is a lot, we always have been, and they’re probably also under a gag order not to talk about the finale, and are annoyed that people keep asking.

So nah, Meg is not anti Destiel.

To the first part!! So let’s take a look at the show runners since Cas has been around.

Seasons 4 and 5: Kripke

Seasons 6 and 7: Gamble

Seasons 8-11ish: Carver

Seasons 11ish-15: Dabb

So starting with Kripke. Okay, yes, I will be the first to admit that we have some pretty incredible Destiel moments in these seasons, but it’s less directly written into the plot and much more from Misha and Jensen’s uhhhh ~chemistry~. The only times it was directly written into the script was when the episode was handled by someone like Edlund (“On The Head Of A Pin,” “The End,” “My Bloody Valentine”). And you have to remember, if in season 5, there are moments here and there where you’re like huh that’s suspiciously romantic dialogue, remember that Cas took Anna’s place. Anna was supposed to be endgame for Dean, but due to a myriad of issues and Misha’s general greatness, Anna was replaced with Cas.

Onto 6 and 7. Hmmm. Gamble. 6 and 7 are my two least favorite seasons and that’s no secret, and that’s not only due to the plain old weird shit in the overall storyline, but also that homegirl killed off Cas in s7 and then Bobby like four episodes later. (Also it ALWAYS rubbed me the wrong way they couldn’t have Baby in that season lol). We still had some great DeanCas moments, but again, it wasn’t really written into the overall arc (until they had to change the end of season 7 because of tanking ratings and bring Misha back lol, anyone remember the fact that Dean kept Cas’ jacket and would randomly dream of him? Yeah.). But we still had those moments, those distinctly romantic moments, probably the best example in these two seasons is from Edlund again, specifically “The Man Who Would be King,” I wrote a little about that here.

We move onto Carver, who gave us, at this point, the most overt DeanCas season with season 8 (season gr8 is a better name imo), and this is the first time Dean and Cas’ relationship is directly written as an arc of the season.  I mean, you have everything in Purgatory, Dean “seeing” Cas everywhere, the fact that he felt so guilty that Cas stayed in Purgatory that he manipulated his own memories to think that he was the one that failed Cas, because he couldn’t comprehend that Cas would want to leave him, and let’s not forget Dean snapping Cas out of Naomi’s hold on him in “Goodbye Stranger.”  It was a very obvious shift, not enough to alert the general audience, but more than enough for most of us in fandom.

It’s also important to note that this is when Andrew stopped co writing with Loflin and started writing his own episodes (”Hunter Heroici” anyone?)  I like Loflin fine, but Dabb was able to stretch his legs a little bit more once he stopped co-writing, and we also began to see some DeanCas themes in his solo episodes.

In any case, them and their issues being a big part of the seasons continued with Carver, and Berens entered the scene, his first episode (”Heaven Can’t Wait”) is one of my favorites, with human Cas and the fanfiction gap and Dean and Cas just generally being awkward and funny and sweet.  This is Bobo’s FIRST episode, remember that.  He comes right out of the gate with it.

Also in Season 9, this is when Dean takes the Mark of Cain, and the Cas/Colette mirror is born, so obviously, Dean and Cas are the fabric of the season once again.  This is also the season where Metatron says Cas is “in love with humanity,” and then immediately refers to Dean as Humanity so uhhhh yeah.

Onto season 10, Dabb and Berens continue with their greatness (I could write pages on the DeanCas date in “The Things We Left Behind” alone).  And then we have one of the best scenes in the entire show in “The Prisoner” where the Cas/Colette mirror continues and Dean, driven by grief and pain and rage and the Mark, still doesn’t kill Cas.  He still can’t kill Cas.

Season 11 is important because it takes choice away from both Cas and Dean, and shows us, as the audience, how much losing each other takes out of them. We saw in season 10 how much losing Dean takes from Cas, but what about Cas losing Dean?  Dean loses his choice with his connection to Amara this season, and loses even more when Lucifer reveals he’s been possessing Cas, and plays on Dean’s connection to Cas like a mockery.  It’s also worth noting that, similarly to season 8, Dean breaks out of the connection with Amara when he’s worried about Cas, and that’s something that even SHE is surprised by.

But then season 12, the beginning to the Renaissance.  This is when we get the writer’s that become important for what Dean and Cas are today, and, truly, why I believe they want canon Destiel as much as we do.

This is the first season with Dabb’s writers: Davy Perez, Meredith Glynn, Steve Yockey, and of course Bobo all come in with their incredible talents and gave us episode after episode of good content.  “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets” is probably my favorite, probably the best example of what I’m saying.  An episode where Dean is called out by an enemy directly, told to “roll the dice” on Cas’ life.  And Dean won’t, it’s not even really a hesitation.  And this comes from a character that has known Dean for ten seconds.  I also wrote more in depth about this episode here.  There are also some.....distinctly domestic details we get this season, specifically in “The Future” (written by Berens and Glynn) with the mixtape.  The most tropey of tropes mixtape.  Yeah, I’ll just leave that one here.

And then season 12 ends with Cas’ death, but also with the parallel between Sam and Dean with Jess and Cas.  Sam literally has to drag Dean away from Cas, just like Dean had to drag Sam out of his burning apartment in the pilot.  The episode drives it home in every way that it can: Dean is the one left kneeling by Cas’ body, while Sam goes to find out what is upstairs.  Dean is the one who stares at the sky, finally broken.  This isn’t a random thing, this is Dean’s whole arc, it’s the entirety of the beginning of 13.  Dean’s pain, his anguish, his anger.

Season 13 starts with them burning Cas, with Dean, who has begged God to bring him back, who has split his knuckles punching a door, standing, staring at Cas’ pyre with brokenness on his face.

I mean.....

Anyway, season 13 is where it gets interesting (well, I think all of this is interesting but I’m a writer nerd so).  So Cas comes back from the Empty in “Advanced Thanatology” written by Steve Yockey, and then a wombo combo of “Tombstone” by Davy Perez next (”Brokebacknatural” as the PR said at the time).  Listen.  This is the part that SPN crossed a line that they couldn’t come back from.  With Cas being Dean’s “big win,” the fact that Dean and Cas watch movies together, “I told you, he’s an angry sleeper.  Like a bear.” Talked about it here.

This is where, in my opinion, the network stepped in, but the damage was already done.  They had already established that Cas was Dean’s big win, that Dean’s poor coping was not due to Mary’s disappearance, but solely due to Cas, and that Dean and Cas have more married energy than anyone else.  The network had nixed blatant canon at this point, and they writing room had been pushing the boundaries of what the network would allow. 

After these episodes, we see a marked drop off of DeanCas heavy scenes.  They’re still there, still a part of the fabric of the season, but not as...obvious as it had been in early season 13.

And this continued through season 14, we’re back to scraps of Destiel scenes here and there, but to me it always felt like there was something bubbling under the surface, something distinctly unsaid in the themes of the season, even after the walk back of obvious “Dean and Cas are in love” scenes.

And then we get to season 15, which, y’all know I talk about all the time.  What’s important here is that Bobo and Glynn are both executive producers, calling more of the shots than ever before.  Additionally, it’s important to note that, though they only co write occasionally, Glynn and Berens refer to each other as “work husband” and “work wife.”  Each episode has just turned up the volume, and, not for the first time, but certainly the most obvious, Dean and Cas ARE the season.  Sure, they’re trying to beat God, they’re trying to finally find peace, defeat the final big bad, but really?  This season has been about Dean, and Dean’s relationship to Cas.

And not only do we have obvious and clear Destiel in nearly every episode, but we have episodes like “Last Call” which canonize bi!Dean (wrote about that here).

And, maybe most importantly so far, we have “The Rupture,” the breakup, and “The Trap,” Dean’s confession (both written by Berens).  And here’s the thing.  These episodes feel connected, but also feel like they’re missing something.  Beren’s last episode is 15x18, “The Truth.”  We’ve all spec’ed about what could happen in this episode, and I think *I* know what it’s leading to.  But for it to be leading to that, it means that the network has to have approved what we’ve all been waiting for years for.

Who got this change to happen?  Who got the network to change their minds?  It wasn’t us.  It was them.  I am fully convinced that Dabb and Berens quite literally put their careers on the line for Dean and Cas.  They believe in them, they’ve shown that from the beginning, but the only thing standing in the way was the network, never allowing them to take the final step. 

So, to answer your question: I think the writers want canon DeanCas because they’ve already shown us that they do.  Take a look at their episodes, at Dabb’s, at Beren’s, at Glynn’s, at Perez’s, at Yockey’s.  They’ve been telling us what’s going on with Dean and Cas for years.

Sure, I’m not in their heads, I guess I don’t know for *sure* that this has been their thought process, but if we put it all together, from the marked shift when Dabb fully took over in s12, to the change right after “Tombstone,” to the new shift, the blatantly romantic shift in season 15, what else is there?

I’ve said for a long time that we, the SPN fandom, are beyond lucky to have the writer’s that we do.  They’re all going to go on to have prolific careers and we were lucky to get them at the end of our little show.  I give them a lot of credit for what we have in the show today.

Just remember, they’ve been telling us in all of s15 who Chuck is.  He says he’s the writer, right?  But a writer who doesn’t have control of his characters?  A writer who wants to do the same ending over and over because it “works”?  That doesn’t sound like a writer, it sounds like a network exec.

They’ve been showing us what they want for years, and the way s15 is going?  I think they may have convinced the network to let us have it.