#the fact it’s been months literally made my stomach drop

[acourtofquestions]

Me to Cairn who my audiobook says like “Karen” because Chapter 4 has already killed a piece of me

Me starting KoA:

[gremlingottoosilly]

thinking about konig asking to eat you out and you being like “lol no i’m on my period.” and he’s all “ohhhh idc idc i wanna eat it so bad 🥺” and you need to be like no. buddy. you clearly do not get it. i am not a 2-3 day period, “who needs pads i’ll just freebleed” girlie. i am a 7-8 day, heavy flow, bleed through the pad girlie, lmfao.

and then he eats it anyways because not only has he been around so much more blood than you could ever imagine but also he’s lowkey highkey into it teeeheeeeeeee ;P

"Schatzen, I kill people for money. You really think I'm scared of a little blood?" You wasn't nervous of the fact he wasn't scared of a bit of blood - even though it was not, in fact, just a little. Even though it was, in fact, a lot and made you ask him to bring you newer pads. You didn't really think he would be scared of a bit of period blood - but you were fucking terrified at the fact that he seemed to adore it. To cherish every drop, till the last one - to press his face between your thighs and look at you like a kitten who wants a bit of cream. The thing is, Konig missed you. Returning from a two month contract only meant he was ready to destroy your pelvis and fuck you for every hour he is on leave - unfortunately, he can't quite do that, you're too fragile to take his cock four times per day...but you can take his tongue. Even if that means having the metallic taste cling to his tongue for days on end, he would gladly spend the whole week buried in your cunt, relishing in your taste. It's a nice way to deal with cramps, he might think. Konig literally read one article about how orgasms can sometimes help some people with their cramps, and he'd use this for the rest of his life. Oh, your stomach is hurting and you feel like your womb is trying to eat you from the inside? Just let him eat you out! No matter how many times you push him away and beg for him to stop, he'd still laugh and push his tongue deeper, over and over. He is a mercenary, he is getting paid tons of money to cover himself in blood of his victims - having his pretty girlfriend cry and cum on his tongue is a nice addition. You don't even question it when he starts to track your periods, knowing you'd have it even when you forget - you don't question the dates he literally keeps posted on your shared calendar, don't care that the amount of heating pads in the house had largely diminished - and he won't buy you a new one because he is much better at being a heating pad anyway!

[feirceangel]

Imagine | Protect (Luffy)

Imagine guarding Luffy’s hat.

Warnings: hurt/comfort

Word Count: 1,224

(Not my gif)

There is something you are one hundred percent certain of. In a life plagued with precariousness and anxiety, there is one truth you can always cling to.

And that is the fact that your captain, Monkey D. Luffy, always has your back.

No matter what situation you find yourself in, he never fails to brighten your day with a smile and defeat whatever foe you're facing.

Whether you're homesick, bored, or literally having your life threatened, he's always right by your side.

He guards each of his crew with a vigour that only he can. His warm smile brighter than a thousand suns as he celebrates yet another victory.

There is another thing you're certain of.

That your captain has one treasure more precious than any of his other objects.

His straw hat.

Given to him by the infamous Red-Haired Shanks, Luffy values that hat above all else.

Even at the cost of his own safety.

There's been countless times where you've watched in horror as Luffy was struck but managed to keep one hand firmly atop his hat.

It never got easier seeing him battle men quadruple his size and strength. Your stomach would clench with worry and you'd do your best to help battle the other opponents, but you always felt so helpless.

Watching him take on such intense foes made you feel proud of him and also concerned for his well being.

Although now that you've been sailing as a Straw Hat Crew member for months, you've come to realize that your captain can take on anything.

His hat, less so.

So, here you sit, quietly mending his hat as Luffy gapes at your handiwork.

"Awesome!" He grins, face alight with joy, "You're good at this, Y/n!"

"I'm just glad you're okay," you confess, carefully stitching away.

It's no secret how you feel about Luffy: everyone on the crew knows about your crush. And you have confidence that Luffy feels the same way.

It's in the little things he does. Always finding an excuse to hug you, explore new islands with you, and even share his food with you. And he never shares his food with anyone else.

So, it's safe to say he at least likes you.

He laughs, "You need to stop worrying so much!"

"You need to stop getting beat up!" You fire back, finishing your stitch. "Seriously, I'm starting to think you like pain."

He laughs, "I don't! But I got him in the end, Y/n! That's all that matters."

You sigh and motion for him to bow his head. He does and you gently set his hat back in its rightful place.

He grins up at you, "Thanks, Y/n! Let's go see if Sanji's done making supper!"

Luffy snatches your hand in his as soon as you drop your needle into your sewing kit. He drags you into the kitchen, using his devil fruit power to snatch up an apple.

"Sanji," he mumbles around a mouthful of fruit, "When's food gonna be ready? I'm hungry."

"Not yet," the cook shakes his head. "I need thirty more minutes."

Luffy groans loudly, leaning his head on your shoulder, "That's too long!"

"You have to wait!"

Luffy scrunches his nose in annoyance before dragging you outside again. Once there, he shoves the apple near your mouth, "Have a bite!"

You're surprised he hasn't eaten it all already. Opening your mouth, you take a large bite of the tangy goodness, humming your approval.

"Thanks," you start to mumble but he stops you mid sentence by leaning in and pressing his lips to yours.

A furious heat flushes your face at his abrupt actions.

"W-what was that for?"

He grins and swipes his tongue over his mouth, "You had juice on your lips."

You're floored, unable to respond as the kiss replays in your head. Meanwhile, he's already walking away with a giddy giggle.

~

You watch with bated breath as Luffy's hat goes flying.

He's fighting a particularly strong foe, having to use all his focus on the battle.

Without a second thought, you race after his treasure, determined to keep it safe for him. He's always doing so much for you, so you want to return the favour.

The other Straw Hats are occupied, no one noticing as you slip away to chase after the stray hat. A strong wind has blown it quite the distance, and you find it stuck on a tree branch.

You grab it, turning on your heel to trudge back to the main fight. But there's a problem.

A large group of marines stand in front of you, each one wearing a menacing grin.

"Look who we have here," the supposed leader comments, stepping forwards.

You instinctively hide Luffy's hat behind your back, grinning back ferociously.

"Gentlemen, what are you doing so far from the real fight?"

"Could ask you the same," he sneers. "What's that behind your back? Is it the infamous Straw Hat Luffy's straw hat?"

Your grip on the straw tightens.

"You're in charge of safeguarding it huh? Is that all you're good for?"

They laugh amongst themselves.

"I wonder if they'd kick you out if you failed the one task they gave you," he steps forward again.

"Over my dead body," you hiss, taking out your weapon after securing the hat to your belt. "If this hat is destroyed, then I have no reason to go on."

Before they can make the first move, you've taken down two of them, angered at their words and fuelled with the desire to protect Luffy's treasure.

The fight goes on too long.

Outnumbered, you take hits that knock you down and leave you bloodied and bruised. Maybe even with a few broken bones.

By now, you're on the ground, clutching the hat in your bloodied hands as a torrent of kicks fall on your back.

You took down well over half the marines but the few remaining are mad as hell and taking it out on you.

You barely register the outraged cry of your captain as he shouts, "Gum-Gum Gatling!"

The kicks stop as your attackers go flying, landing with dull thuds. They don’t get back up again.

Luffy is quick to rush to your side, “Y/n! Are you alright?!”

“Luffy,” you manage a small smile, shakily handing him his hat. “I protected your treasure.”

He doesn’t smile, in fact he looks angry.

“Idiot! You’re my treasure,” he shouts, gripping onto your shoulders, “And now you’re hurt!”

Confused, you stare up into his eyes, “But you love this hat.”

“But I love you more,” he shakes you again before screaming for Chopper to come and assess the damage done to you.

After you’re back on the ship, nicely bandaged and safe in bed, Luffy approaches you again. He seems less energetic than normal, dragging his feet as he comes to the bed.

“Thank you for protecting my hat. I’m sorry I didn’t protect you.”

“Luffy,” you gently clasp his hand, “You’ve always protected me.”

His eyes are wet with tears, “But-“

“I couldn’t ask for a better captain,” you reiterate, pulling him closer. “You’re all I could hope for.”

“Really?”

“Honest,” you smile, “Now come here.”

You drag him into your arms, wincing slightly. He is cautious of your injuries, gently returning your hug.

“Thank you.”

[cannellee]

TOKYO REVENGERS OMEGAVERSE ☆

୨୧ alpha! tokyorev x omega! f! reader (pairing: ran, rin, izana, mikey, shinichiro)

— seeing you texting a guy they don't know

note : hi guys, I'm back!! I'm so so sorry for not posting anything for months (._.), I've been trying to enjoy my holiday and spend less time online! also I'm slowly getting back to writing but for now I'll post tiny stuff just like that one! (^-^)

MY MASTERLIST: ☆

𐙚. RAN

"who are we texting babe". after seeing you so focused on the screen and the name of guy on top of it he literally snatches your phone away from your hands while scrolling through your convo : he has little to no shame and has no trouble keeping you away from your phone as he quite simply towers over you. he wont give it back unless he wants to.

he kinda acts like he's joking because he doesn't wanna get mad for nothing but inside he's actually a tiny bit angry that a dude he doesn't know is talking with his omega, no matter what's your relationship with him.

                                    · · ୨୧ · ·

𐙚. RIN

rin's jealousy is cuter, maybe less invasive and annoying. he does take a peek over your shoulder to see who has your fingers working so hard to hold a convo but doesn't go further than that.

when he notices it's a guy who has your attention right now instead of him, he still has the decency to ask who he is and what you both are talking about and not outright look at your texts. you answer him and tell him about your friend and he just hums before poking your side and stomach, trying hard to make you laugh and giggle and make this damn phone fall down and get your attention off of it.

he's sweet and understanding with it, contrary to his brother.

                                    · · ୨୧ · ·

𐙚. IZANA

izana isn't letting it slide but if you're in a relationship with him, it means you probably already have come to term with the fact that you have little to no privacy. he looks through your phone and knows your password, checks your gallery and your texts. izana insists he has that same transparency with you so you have free access to his phone as well, even though you trust him enough to not do anything with it.

if you're texting a guy he doesn't know, it means he's a new friend you just made and that you actually don't know much about him either. izana uses that excuse to make you drop the convo with him and have your attention back on him. if you disagree, he's quick to get annoyed and could even go as far as deleting the guy's number without any regard for your opinion.

                                    · · ୨୧ · ·

𐙚. MIKEY

you often spend time together like this on the couch, mikey with his head on your chest and his eyes glued to your phone. if a text of a random dude he doesn't know pops up, he isn't quick to jump to conclusions but is rather curious, especially if you try and dismiss it. he wants to know what's your relationship: classmates? colleagues? friends? either way mikey will find a way to belittle and badmouth him even without knowing anything about that person.

he'll get grumpy and sometimes a bit angry each time his name appears on your screen so you start interacting less and less with that friend, until you eventually don't anymore.

                                    · · ୨୧ · ·

𐙚. SHINICHIRO

he jokingly acts sulky and pouts to get a reaction out of you, he loves to have his pretty omega all over him and absolutely adores the attention you give him. of course it's nothing serious in his eyes so he simply shrugs it off and keeps an ear open whenever you talk about that friend because he knows you don't have a lot of guy friends, so he's both curious and wary.

that guy better not be an alpha though because shinichiro is quick to get jealous. he can't help but seeing in him as a rival and his instincts are quick to turn him possessive.

                                    · · ୨୧ · ·

[l13]

bitter

dunno what brought this on but reader has good taste;P also let's pretend that lyla is team reader x miguel for plot reasons

word count: 2.3k

WARNINGS: NSFW 18+, MDNI, f!reader, ex!miguel, aged up bf!hobie<3, miguel has some v descriptive sexual thoughts about you (p in v sex, f!receiving oral), swearing, jealousy, ANGSTTT

English is not my first language so I apologize in advance for any misspells, errors or grammatically incorrect sentences.

Miguel often thinks about how he ended up giving in to his desires and starting a situationship with you, how he regrets it when he can tell how you've fallen for him. How your eyes crinkle when you smile at him, looking at him like he hung the moon. He regrets it because that's how he looks at you as well.

Why’d you have to ask him on that stupid date?

“That’d be unprofessional.” is what Miguel had said in reply. Because it was the truth. You were only fucking, nothing more.

You’d scoffed, “Oh come on, Miguel, we’re not office workers. Surely we can go out together?”

“What, fucking me ain’t enough for you?”

You'd huffed, your expression dull, shaking your head in disbelief, “No, actually, it isn’t. I genuinely like you, is that so bad?”

Miguel had ignored the flip his stomach did at your confession “You know why we can’t, now drop it.”

“No, I want you to tell me why.”

“It’s not in the canon” He cringes every time he remembers what he’d said, but it doesn’t change the fact that he was right. He was, but fuck, how he wanted to be wrong. He so desperately wanted it to be him that you were meant to fall in love with, him you were meant to build a life together.

“Fuck the canon.” had been your reply, before you turned to walk away and he'd made no move to follow you.

He'd failed to ignore Lyla when she'd whistled, “That was painful even for me,”

“Jesus- can you not?”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, can't interrupt your brooding time. I'm just saying. You prevented the woman of your dreams from falling in love with you, because she's meant to fall for someone else? But that's stupid- Your heart literally jumps when you see her-”

“Lyla I swear to God, if you don't stop talking-”

And now, as he stands in front of your house months later, waiting for you to answer the door, Miguel found himself to be annoyed. Annoyed that he hadn't gotten your mission report on time, and had to come and fetch it for himself.

Some sick, twisted part of his brain wanted you to have forgotten it on purpose, and ignored his calls in order for him to come over, maybe reconcile- fuck your brains out till you're begging him to take you back, even if it meant putting your feelings aside.

“She better be home,” Miguel hisses to himself, his hand massaging his temples, and he doesn't even flinch when Lyla shows up out of nowhere “Oh, she is. The thermal scan picks her up, see? Wait who’s-”

Miguel was thankful for the interruption, but what he saw when you opened the door was not at all what he expected, or was even prepared for.

You were practically naked, an oversized t-shirt covering your body, stopping just under your ass and- Jesus Christ were those thigh highs? Yes they were, pretty ones, too. They were sheer white tights, that ended just in the middle of your plush thighs, the material hugging your legs beautifully, the very top of them decorated with a lace material, giving them a sexy twist.

God, he'd get on his knees right here and now if you just asked-Miguel licked his lips and cleared his throat, quickly averting his gaze, praying that he doesn't appear flustered.

“Miguel! Are you okay? Is something wrong? Hey Lyla-” you seem out of breath as you talk, clearly not bothered by your lack of clothing in front of him. Lyla offers you a bright hello and wave, one you softly smile at.

No, he's not fucking okay.

“I'm great.” he hisses, but really he was trying to convince himself of it. You study him for a bit longer before humming, not believing him for a moment.

“I need the report from the mission that you were sent to do yesterday. The one you forgot to send me.” Miguel inhales sharply and stands taller, trying to hide the fact that your presence damages his brain functionality severely, by trying to look more intimidating.

Memories of last night flash in your mind suddenly, being pressed against your bookshelf, the furniture rattling loudly, books almost toppling to the floor, but you didn’t have the heart in you to care. Not when he was grinding up at you, hand under your thigh to keep you upright as you moaned against his mouth crossing your legs around his waist and bringing him closer, the sound of your watch beeping pulling you out of your trance, “Fuck, wait. T-the reports-”

He undid your watch expertly with one hand, and you gasped trying to snatch it from his grasp, but he held it up above your head, placing it on top of your bookshelf carelessly, before grabbing the top shelf to brace himself and grind himself harder against you, moaning under his breath, “Fuck ‘em.”

Your eyes widen comically, and you sputter, “Right! Shit- fuck. I'm sorry, umm, wait here.” and you slam the door right in his face. Miguel's eyebrow twitches.

There's shuffling from inside before Miguel realizes that you're talking to someone-

“Can you go in five minutes? Please?”

“Nah, ‘m afraid I need to go right now, love. Got things to do, places to be.”

“Can't you open up a portal here?”

“When there’s a perfectly usable front door? I don’ think so,” “C’mon pretty.. what are y’so afraid of?”

“He’s our boss.”

“He’s your ex. Now, if you’re ashamed to be seen with me, I get it-”

“No! Baby, no. I just don’t want to rub it in his face, don't want him to think that I am either,”

“But that’s so boring. Let’s make ‘im suffer, you’ll thank me later-”

“Hob-”

The door opens suddenly and Miguel could act surprised, could act like he’s been waiting for quite a while not knowing what’s going on inside, but he doesn’t. Not when he’s face to face with Hobie. Not when he obviously knows how good Miguel’s hearing is, how he could definitely hear every word that was spoken, not when you’d tried to be nice- tried to whisper and be subtle, not when Hobie blatantly did the opposite out of spite.

So he just stares ahead with a blank face, as Hobie leans against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest lazily. There’s a hickey on his neck and Miguel feels like he might throw up.

And somehow, Miguel still thinks that this is all some sick joke, a prank, a dream. Anything to explain what he's seeing. Because there’s no way you're dating Hobie. There’s no way you fucked Hobie fucking Brown- the single most annoying person in Miguel’s life (after peter, of course). And after what, only eight months after you stopped seeing him? That's how long it took for you to get over him? He can almost hear Lyla laughing in his head, 'You're just bitter that you're not over her yet'

Hobie smirks at him “Hello mate, long time no see.” Miguel at least has the human decency to offer him a curt nod, which Hobie apparently finds hilarious as he huffs out a laugh, “'S alright if I send my report later, right? I'm kind of exhausted right now, did a lot of runnin' yesterday, y'know,”

Lyla visibly winces and disappears a second later.

Running. Miguel needed breathing exercises and he needed them now-

Miguel's eyes snapped to yours. Were you just gonna let Hobie talk all that shit, without saying anything? (Knowing Hobie's life was in imminent danger?) Apparently so, because you just scoffed and rolled your eyes with a smile on your face. What a great couple you two made.

He refused to believe that this is who you chose, refused to acknowledge that his anger was pointed at himself and not you. He’d never, ever, admit it, not even at gunpoint, but Hobie was a good kid, he’d treat you right and that's what pissed him off the most.

“Fuck the canon.” Hobie would have laughed and nodded in agreement at your words, not Miguel though. Miguel had said nothing and it had cost him his future with you.

Sensing that Miguel wouldn’t reply anytime soon, Hobie just shrugged nonchalantly, “Thanks for understanding, boss.”

Miguel felt like he could hear his own veins pulsing. Boss, he'd called him boss. That little-

Turning to you, Hobie throws a hand around your waist and squeezes you against him, pressing a kiss on your cheek “I'll see you later love, don' forget to put some ice on that, yeah?” he lays a slap on your ass that makes you almost tumble forward, and Hobie's smirk widens when he sees Miguel ball his fists at his sides, nostrils flaring. Hobie throws a wink at Miguel before squeezing through him to walk out, seeing as Miguel didn't make any attempt to get out of the way.

Miguel doesn't turn to see him open up a portal to leave, he's too busy looking at the way the multi-colored lights illuminate your face, how you grin and wave shyly at your boyfriend.

“So sorry about him.. d'you wanna come in?” you ask, shifting from one leg to another once the portal disappears. Miguel just stares at you, eyes hooded, mouth pressed in a tight line.

“Ookay, I’ll just go get the- yeah” you trail off and turn to walk deeper into your apartment, and Miguel hates himself for craning his neck to catch a glimpse of your ass. And then hates himself even more when he thinks about how smug Hobie would be if he knew Miguel was checking out his girl. He'd say some dumb shit like "Wanting somethin' you can't have again, boss?"

Meanwhile, you're standing on your tippy-toes in front of your infamous bookshelf, arm outstretched, trying to grab your watch but to no use, cursing Hobie in your mind for putting it so high up. You had no idea that by trying to get your stupid watch, you were giving Miguel the perfect view of your backside, seeing as your shirt rode up each time you stretched out your arm.

No, fuck that. You knew exactly what you were doing, and Hobie was right. Let him suffer. He chose this, so now he can deal with the consequences.

Miguel wanted to give everything up right then and there. It's funny how quickly you could strip him of his morals, and he just wishes he could have done that before realizing he'd lost you forever. He could picture his future in his mind so clearly, if only he'd just said yes to your question.

“Will you go out with me?"

He’d resign, move out some place nice, next to a beach preferably. Spend his days laying on the sand and drinking piña coladas with no care in the world.

Except you’d be there. Straddling his lap to steal his drink, giggling and laughing when he tried to take it back from you. He’d grab your hips and with a swift motion you'd switch places, your back against the hot sand. The drink would spill from the movement, the liquid falling over your bikini covered tits, and you’d gasp oh-so prettily when he’d bend to lick it all up.

You’d moan even sweeter when he’d move lower, when he’d eat you out till you’re a crying, babbling mess, whining that you can’t take it anymore. Oh, but you could. You would take it, and he’d prove it when he’d later fuck you against the pool, and he’d make sure he fucked you good. Your mewls would be panted against his ear as he’d thrust into you relentlessly, your fingers digging into his wet back, and all he’d taste would be your pretty moans and the faint taste of rum against his tongue.

His cheeks would hurt from how hard he'd be grinning as he stared at you when you both would go for a walk by the beach later. He'd jog up to you, springing you in his arms, nuzzling his head against your hair- your distinctive smell fogging up his brain- your laughter mixing together, as you chased each other through the waves.

When you'd had enough, and stood panting, your -now wet- dress clinging to you like second skin, he'd drop to his knee, pulling out a ring from his pocket, one he was anxious not to drop when he was chasing you around, and you'd gape at him, tears already welling up in your eyes.

You would have said yes that night. In fact, the word would have been repeated against his shoulder as he fucked you later, rolling his hips into you slowly, kissing your pretty tears, holding you, loving you–

“Done! I just sent it–,” you could have sworn you and Miguel shivered at the same time when he blinked down at you, his mouth parted. His eyes were glistening all of a sudden, and it made your whole being fill with a sense of longing and dread.

“Lyla?” you swallowed harshly at Miguel's hoarse tone, gnawing at your lip as you avoided his gaze.

It was as if Lyla knew not to fuck with him either, because she didn't even make him beg for it, instead pulling up a hologram that showed the report, “Yup, got it!”

You cleared your throat, eager to get back into bed and forget the look on his face just now, suddenly feeling nostalgic for a memory you couldn't quite place- “I'm sorry that I forgot, it won’t happen again, promise.”

Yes it will.

“See you back at HQ?”

Miguel hums, not saying anything, not even caring to correct you, because he’d sooner see you in his dreams than at headquarters.

2023 © l13 | Do not steal, copy, edit, translate or re-post any of my works.

[mercwiththem0uth]

another drabble because i have soft!wade literally living on my mind 24/7. not proof read!

x gn!reader showering with deadpool and caring for him when his skin has a bad flare-up.

you had been in a relationship with wade for a couple of years now. you knew him inside-out. you loved him so deeply and would do absolutely anything for him, and he was totally head-over-heels for you because of it.

unfortunately, sometimes his mutation causes the scars on his skin to flare up, becoming irritable and painful. he would say that his skin essentially hurt him all the time, and he was just very used to the pain. however when these rare moments happened where it hurt more than usual, you tried to do everything you could to make things more comfortable for him.

in the earlier stage of your relationship, when the first flare-up happened, you spent a long time stood in the kitchen surrounded by a huge amount jars, test tubes, liquids, essential oils, and syringes, trying to find the best combination for a special lotion that wade could use to moisturise his unique skin.

wade stood in the doorway, a small smile on his face as he watched your eyes narrow, tongue poking out of your mouth slightly, concentrating so hard on the task in front of you.

you were so engrossed in measuring out the ingredients and stirring your lotions into different labelled pots, that you hadn't noticed him observing you.

"what are you doing, doll?" wade's voice spoke gently as he stepped towards you in the kitchen. you jumped, heart almost skipping a beat as you hadn't suspected anyone to be home with you.

realising it was him, you relaxed. "you're back early" you smiled at him, tilting your head.

"no I'm not" he smiled widely, motioning his head towards the clock, which read 7:36pm.

oh...

you had been stood in the kitchen doing your little experiments for much longer than you had realised.

wade came behind you, wrapping his strong arms around your waist, dropping a kiss to your exposed shoulder, before whispering in your ear. "so... you never told me what you are doing." he stood back and leaned against the counter, inhaling a deep breath of the different smells that you had created. he was getting senses of ginger and honey... coconut and oatmeal.

"if i was to guess, you're starting up some sort of etsy home-business?"

you giggled at his silliness.

"i'm trying to create a lotion for you. to help... you know... your skin. i know it's been hurting recently." you blushed slightly, suddenly feeling a bit embarrassed.

wade felt his heart swell at your words. he almost melted right there on the floor. you had only been together a couple of months, and wade was still very insecure about his appearance around you. but the fact that you were going out of your way to make something to help him, almost made him want to cry.

he knew in that moment that you were something extremely special. you were still in the early stage of your relationship, yet you were being so selfless and kind towards him.

"oh, baby" he whispered, a small smile on his face. "that is so kind. thank you."

the sincerity in his voice made your stomach flutter. you hadn't seen a very affectionate/grateful side of wade yet, but little did you know that this was only the beginning, and you are yet to meet the very clingy, loveable deadpool.

he came and wrapped you in a hug, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

you spent the rest of that evening sat together round the kitchen table, testing the lotions and altering some of the recipes, before he settled on one that he really liked. he still uses it to this day, and you happily make him a new batch every month.

wade sat in the passenger seat of dopinder's taxi, staring out the window. his lips were curled until a soft smile as he thought about that memory. you had been his biggest supporter since day one.

he climbed out of the taxi and gave dopinder a high five, before slowly making his way up to your shared apartment. his footsteps were slow and heavy as his muscles ached and his skin screamed against his suit with every step that he took. he finally crashed through the door, immediately relaxing slightly as the familiar scent and warmth of home surrounded him.

"hey baby!" he heard you call from the bedroom, as he kicked his shoes off and made his way to find you. you were folding laundry as you looked up at him and smiled, having missed him all day. he managed to smile back, never once breaking eye contact as you approached him for a kiss. resting your hands on his shoulders you pressed a sweet kiss to his lips, a toothy grin on your face as you pulled away.

"are you okay?" you said gently, watching as your boyfriend began to take his suit off, his face screwing up and flinching in agony every once in a while. "does it hurt?" you whispered.

he just nodded his head, a small sigh and grunt escaping his mouth. you frowned, wishing you could take away his pain. "i'm sorry baby, anything i can do to help?"

"i'm gonna take a shower" he said, voice barely above a whisper, as he peeled the last piece of his suit from his body. you followed him into the bathroom, watching as he leaned to turn the shower on to a lukewarm/cool temperature, making you frown again. he couldn't even enjoy the feeling of hot water. "what's the frown for, kitten?" he said, pulling his underwear down and kicking them off his feet.

"i just feel bad for you", you sighed, hating to see the love of your life feel this way.

"don't be silly" he pulled you against him, holding you in a small hug, "i'm used to it."

"but still, you don't deserve it."

"hey now, if i wasn't a mutant, cancer would've got me a long time ago and I never would've met you." he squeezed your shoulders before pulling away, watching your face waiting to see you smile.

he climbed into the shower, before turning back to you. "you can join me if you like," wriggling his eyebrows, "i wouldn't recommend it though, your sweet cheeks will get cold."

you smiled and rolled your eyes. eventhough he was in pain, he was trying to be his usual-self that always cheers you up. you pulled off your clothes and joined him in the shower, letting him stand at the water end. his big eyes looked down at you, filled with love and adoration, but underlying sadness. he was just in pain, and needed some comfort. you noticed immediately, reaching round to grab his soap. it was an expensive one, formulated to be kind and gentle to his skin.

you poured some onto a soft sponge and used your hands to lather it up with some water, directing him to turn around. you placed the sponge ever so gently at the top of his shoulder blades, before slowly moving it down across his back. he tensed up, liking the feeling but hating it at the same time. his hand reached backwards and he used his fingers to brush against your thigh, indicating to you that he wanted to hold your hand. you reached down and locked fingers with him, giving it a small squeeze, whilst still using the other hand to slowly sweep the sponge across his backside. you squeezed the sponge in your hand, letting the soapy water trickle down his body, so you weren't putting any friction on his most sensitive and inflamed areas.

you brought his hand up to your mouth to kiss it, before tightly tugging him to face you again. he turned around to let you wash his chest and stomach.

you peeked up at wade, his head was dropped down to his chest with his eyes screwed shut. you put an arm around his waist, pulling him close and pressing a kiss to his forehead. he leaned into your touch, wanting more. you breathed a laugh against his skin, giving one more kiss, before passing him the sponge and letting him finish washing his more intimate areas. (although he definitely would not have minded if you'd done that for him)

once he was rinsed off, you helped him out of the shower and passed him the fluffiest towel you could find. you left him alone and ventured back into the bedroom, pulling out some clean pyjamas for the both of you, before going to the kitchen to order his favourite chimichangas.

wade eventually appeared, wearing nothing but some cotton underwear. you looked at him confused, "i got some clothes out for you, bub."

his eyes darted down to his hand, where he was holding a bottle of your home-made lotion. your eyes softened as you whispered an "okay", before quickly washing your hands.

you joined wade on the couch where he was turning on a movie, sitting next to him and rubbing some lotion between your hands. he leaned into your touch and began to finally relax against you, as you gave him the gentlest massage you possibly could.

you spent the rest of the evening cuddling your big baby of a boyfriend, using your fingers to moisturise every nook and cranny of his back, arms, chest, legs, hands and feet. your heart melted every time you heard him let out a sigh or a grunt of pleasure, knowing his pain was finally easing. even if it was only slightly.

after you'd eaten, wade laid across the couch with his head in your lap, your hand resting lightly on his head. you were both fighting sleep as you tried to make it to the end of the movie.

before drifting away, you felt wade tilt his head up to look at you. you met his eyes, softly blinking at him, trying to read his thoughts.

"i don't deserve you," he mumbled, reaching his fingertips up to caress your cheek. "thank you for everything"

you stared lovingly at him for a moment, before leaning down and pressing a long kiss to his lips. he meant every word. what did he do to deserve someone who loved and cared for him so deeply?

guys I'm so in love with this fictional man it's not even funny i just wanna kiss his face and give him the love he deserves :'(

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

Slice of Paradise

a/n My brain literally now run only on Joel... So here's a little something something. 🫧

summary: Joel dream of having a farmhouse comes true. What makes it even better is that he's not there alone. He has his own little family to enjoy this little slice of paradise with him.

warnings: just tooth rotting fluff, mention of reader being pregnant, mentions of morning sickness.

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If someone were to tell you that somewhere along the line you were going to end up at a place like Jackson in a farmhouse with a loving husband and kids, you would have laughed at them. Or brushed it off to the outback insanity. It seemed impossible. Safety seemed impossible at first. Then followed freedom and, of course, happiness. Those things appeared to be worthy of history textbooks. They could have a title like - at some point in human history, they were happy.

It was hard to move past deaths and past killings. Making sure you kept your humanity alive. Not to become a killing monster. Similar to clickers or any other of those fuckers. When Ellie happened, you had a feeling your life was going to change. You just never imagined it would change so drastically. You and Joel had settled for a dull day-to-day routine. Coming to terms with the fact that your life in QZ was as good as it could get. You never complained. You had one after another. Others didn't even have that kind of luxury.

But here you were now. In a little farmhouse with green shutters that Joel and Ellie had painted over for you because that's what you had always wanted. A garden - full of flowers that you tended to. Of course, to share with the town, but also for your own enjoyment. A couple of dozen of sheep were carelessly plucking grass in the fields around. Something that Joel wanted. Something that had helped him think clearer.

You hummed to yourself. Cutting up the last pieces for supper. The warm spring sun peeped through the windows, only making the smile on your face bigger. It still seemed surreal at times. Like all this was just a dream. One from which you never wanted to awaken. A little flutter in your stomach made you stop. Hand slipping on your five-month pregnant belly. Big enough to let everyone know that you were with a child but not big enough to make it hard for you to move around just yet.

Joel still found the walk to the house odd. It was weird in itself that he had a home to come to. And it wasn't the house itself that surprised him. Oh, no. You, Ellie, and now the baby that was on its was what made it home. A place where he could finally let go. Where the ghost of his past had a harder time finding him. Joel had finally been able to see the bigger picture. He was finally a part of a bigger picture.

With a gun still on his shoulder, Joel opened the wooden gates as he strolled towards the house. The dog on the side of the patio lifted his head, and Joel quickly reached to scratch his ear. "Hi, Brandy, why are you out in front, boy?", Joel questioned as the dog eagerly wagged his tail.

Ellie had come up with the name. She was eager for Joel to name the pup. No one else was allowed to pick a name. "Oh, come on, old thing! Think of something", she said, pushing for a thousand time. She wiggled a toy in her hand as the dog jumped around happily. "I don't know, Ellie. Just name it yourself," he grumbled, even though he knew that she wasn't going to drop the subject until he came up with something. "How about that nasty shit you always drink?", suggested Ellie, looking up. "Brandy?" Joel questioned, and the dog cocked his head at the sound of Joel's voice. Ellie's eyes grew big as she clapped happily. "You like it, boy? Do you like the name? He likes Brandy," she chirped happily. You leaned closer to Joel, laughing as he shook his head, and yet the smile was evident.

The house was quiet as Joel undid his jacket before hanging it up neatly. Knowing that you would be up his sleeve if he left a mess behind himself. He made his way through the house, stopping to listen in the living room. Hoping that he would pick up any sound that would lead him to you. And he did. A light humming came from the kitchen.

And you were indeed there; however, Joel nearly had a heart attack when he saw you standing up on the counter as you tried to reach for something in the upper cabinets. "Have you gone mad, woman", his voice started you, making you nearly drop the jar of spices in your hands. Joel's hands came off either side of your torso as he carefully lifted you off the counter. Your hands pressing into his shoulders.

"What are you doing here?", you questioned, not expecting him to be home just yet. Hence your little adventure. "The better question is, why were you up on the counter at five months pregnant?" You rolled your eyes at him. Appreciating the protectiveness but also slightly hating that now he thought that you were made of glass. "I needed this," you said as you fiddled with the jar in your hands. Moving to take off the lid of the pot before pouring some of it in. Joel's hands didn't leave your sides. "You get the step stool for that, love; we talked about it. You can't do this weird monkey shit; you're not ten." You turned back to your husband. Hands moving to cup his face as you looked at him, "You haven't seen half of my tricks", "I will tie you to the chair if you'll continue to do stuff like that", Joel warned you, and you couldn't help but laugh a little, "Don't forget your gun while you watch over me then".

His eyes altered as he glanced at you, and you couldn't help but let out a sigh. Joel leaned in, pressing his forehead against yours, "I just don't want you both to get hurt." You moved your palms to run up and down his chest. "I know, honey, I promise no more jumping on counters," you said softly, kissing the tip of his nose. "Unless you're supervising me," you chirp, causing Joel to let out a chuckle.

"How are you feeling today?", Joel's tender palms slipped to run over your bump, and you hummed in delight as the warmth from his skin seeped through your flowy dress. "We're good. I didn't start my morning with a head down the toilet, can you believe it?", you cackled, and Joel gave you a knowing look. Morning sickness had taken its toll on you. To the point where he had rushed you to the doctor in town when you blacked out after vomiting for an hour straight. Joel refused to do any morning petrol after that. He wanted. He needed to be by your side. Even if every time you tried to usher him out of the bathroom, claiming it must be extremely disgusting to him.

"That's good, I was worried the whole morning," he admitted, focusing his attention on the bump. "Joel, we are all okay," your hand slipped on top of his, "She's been happily kicking away all morning," "She? No, it's a boy, aren't you, little guy?" Joel leaned down, pressing a lovely kiss and then the other on the swell of your tummy. Shortly after, a light kick followed up Joel's touch, making the male smile as he repeated the action once again.

"And where's El?", Joel asked, looking around the place. She usually sat by the island doing her homework happily by now, but there was no sight of her there. You hummed, "She said she would come a bit later than usual. She's out with a friend," you wiggled your brows, briefly turning your gaze to the food. "A friend?", "Yeah, Dina I think, and I suspect she likes her", a smile spread on your face as you thought about the little girly chat you two had.

"That's good; she deserves to have a friend. Good for her," Joel's arms were still roaming your skin as you turned back to him, giving him a look, "No, Joel. I mean, like, like her," Joel's face blanked as the realization dawned on him, and you hummed. "She brought in pancakes with fruit and cream to school to share with her", you giggled. Joel stayed silent as he stared ahead of himself. It felt silly, but Joel was almost jealous that Ellie suddenly had someone else in her life. Like he didn't want to share her with anyone else. You three had fallen into such conformable dynamics. It felt easy, and it felt right. To Joel, Ellie was still too young to date or have a crush. "Wipe the frown off your face; it's not like she's getting married already," you said as you nudged your husband's shoulder as he folded his hands over his chest.

"Mom," Ellie's voice echoed down the corridor. Your heart fluttered. It still did. Even after more than a year of her referring to you like that. She had sat you and Joel down after a month or two of you moving into the farmhouse. She was a stuttering mess as she tried to explain, or more specifically, ask if she would be allowed to call you her parents.

"Because we like live together, and then you let me stay, and I have my room. But the room, of course, means nothing, but you like wanted me to stay so…", you reached for her hand and then gave it a little squeeze as you cut her ramble off. "I'd be honored to be your mom," you said softly, and Ellie bit down on her lower lip in hopes of stopping it from quivering. Her eyes landed on Joel, who had his arms crossed over his chest. His usual stance - an unapproachable demeanor that he hadn't dropped even now. "Go ahead, just no daddy shit, or you're sleeping in the stables," Joel said. Ellie instantly rounded the corner of the table and launched herself into Joel's arms. Hugged his torso as she smiled. "Okay, daddy," she whispered, making Joel tickle her.

You smiled to yourself as the memory melted into your mind. "In the kitchen, baby," you shouted back. Joel's hand moved back to your hip as he and you waited for Ellie to appear. The footsteps sounded weird. Not as familiar. As if there were more than one set of them. And well, your hearing hadn't failed you, as another girl appeared on Ellie's left side. "Oh, dad, I thought you wouldn't be home." Ellie's face paled slightly, as she noticed Joel, but the lazy smile on his face made her ease up almost instantly. "I missed my girls; I thought I'd surprise you," he said in return. In a way, he was hoping that Ellie would run up to hug him like she always did when Joel returned from work, but he also understood that now that she had a friend here, she probably wouldn't do so.

"Ah… well, this is Dina, a friend from school," Ellie said shyly, and the girl by her side waved nervously at you two, "Can she stay for dinner?" Joel studied the girl. The girl who possibly Ellie liked. He tried to pinpoint the features she might have taken to her liking. "Of course, that would be lovely. Go wash your hands, you two, and I'll come to get you when it's ready." Stepping closer, you caressed Ellie's cheeks tenderly. She flashed you a bright smile as she took Dina by the hand, and the two ran up the stairs laughing.

You turned back to your husband, fanning your hands in front of your eyes as the tears parked up, clouding your vision. "Sugar, what's all of this for?", Joel stepped closer to you, embracing you once again. "Don't pay attention, hormones," you muttered, wiping away the tears. Joel chuckled softly, leaning in to press a kiss to your forehead. "Didn't you just tell me that she ain't getting married just yet?", he teased, making you bite down your lip. As another wave of tears rolled down your cheeks, "Imagine her in a dress, no, a suit—she would do a suit, ahh," you whimpered, covering your face with your hands.

Joel shook his head, pulling you even closer to him, his hands running up and down your back, soothing you. Secretly enjoying this more sensitive side of you. That one that cried at Brandy bathing in the sun or Ellie's school project. Even Joel's neatly folded clothes had you shedding tears. Joel breathed in the scent of you. One hand slipped back down onto your bump. "Take nice, big breaths, honey. Want a glass of water?", he asked, shifting, reaching for a cup as he guided you to sit down on the chair. Quickly stirring the pot before turning back to you.

"Do you think this little bug will grow up just as fast?", your hand slipped over your bump subconsciously once more. Joel hummed, "Don't they all? We'll blink, and this one will be climbing up the countertops," you sniffed again, unable to suppress a grin. "Go to your sheep before you turn me into a puddle", you waved Joel away playfully. It had been his habit for some time. He had a little talk with his soft friend before he sat down for dinner. A way for him to digest the day.

"Do I at least get a kiss?", Joel cocked his head to the side, watching you. "Do you think you deserve one?", "For putting a baby inside you, yes." You let out a gasp, hitting his chest. "Joel, dear God, they might hear you", he lets out a deep belly laugh, stepping closer to you, "Shut me up with a kiss", you roll your eyes. Cupping his cheeks before you leaned in, as you pressed your lips to Joel's in a tender kiss. Yeah, this was home, and even if Joel often thought he didn't deserve it, he wouldn't trade it for anything else.

[captainhotch]

This Love | Roy Kent

note; random ted lasso imagine for the girlies who are in love with roy kent (me). not proof read as per usual

masterlist

There was no such thing as right person wrong time, you reminded yourself for the twentieth time in the past two months as you turned off your tv— absolutely tired of seeing your ex boyfriend blasted all over the football channels.

You had broken up about mid way threw his last season— well, he had broken up with you. You had been together for about a year and a half. A beautiful, really happy year and a half. Sure the man was an absolute grump, preferring more to groan than talk half the time, but he had the largest heart of any person you had ever met. His love was so pure and so kind.

The breakup was a bit of a blindside. He had been playing poorly, slowing down as a consequence of his age catching up. He was making mistakes. And Roy Kent did not make mistakes. So he did what only made sense to him in that moment and cut out all distractions. And you, well you were the biggest distraction of them all.

So you packed all of his things in a cardboard box and marched through the halls of the Richmond FC clubhouse, heals echoing across the lithium floor. Your head was high but your heart was in your stomach as you willed the tears to wait until you were safely back behind the tinted windows of your car.

You smiled at Higgins as you passed him outside of the locker room doors, receiving a sheepish wave back. You didn’t realize it at the time, but your smile paired with the dead look in your eye was absolutely terrifying. Next thing you knew you were dropping the box down on the floor in front of him, whipping your hair over your shoulder, and walking away with a sway of your hips that you know had his eyes glued to your admittedly amazing ass.

It was, of course, an act, cause there you were two months and a retirement later, heart still aching every time you saw the unfortunately handsome man across your screen.

Apparently Roy Kent did, in fact, make mistakes. Maybe not on the pitch, but literally everywhere else. Going home to a bed that didn’t have you in it? A mistake. Not having you by his side through the most difficult decision of his life? A mistake. Watching as you laughed along with Jamie’s flirting across the bar? A horrible, terrible fucking mistake.

Roy Kent was an angry man, but my god did he think he was going to explode in that moment. He wouldn’t be surprised if steam was comically coming out of his ears. He could only be brought to tear his eyes from you at the sound of the seat beside him being pulled out, and an insufferable American accent ordering a whiskey from the bar tender.

“You know Roy— you’re about as subtle as a hot pink convertible driving through a south Georgia suburb.” Ted nodded, eyes following Roy’s to you standing beside a smirking Jamie. “You know you breaking up with her hurt more than my own divorce.”

“Fuck off.” Roy muttered, throwing back the rest of his own whiskey.

“I’m serious man. Y’all two love each other— and no amount of pretending like your don’t will change that. That right there,” he paused, pointing to you—“that is a mighty fine woman. One who loves you. You don’t let something like that slip away if you can help it. Take it from me.”

You couldn’t help but to laugh at Jamie’s jokes. It was a good distraction from being in the same room as Roy for the first time since you had dropped off your stuff. Still you could feel him watching you without even glancing in his direction, like he’d never left. You had to be begged by Keeley to even show face, your dear friend insisting that everyone missed you loads. You had a feeling that she was just testing her theory of the two of you not being able to stay away from each other once you took away the distance.

The back of your neck burned, the same way it would when he’d kiss it in passing. Your stomach, once filled with butterflies, was now heavy with lead. You knew Jamie was only speaking with you to piss Roy off. You didn’t care. Or maybe you did, and that’s why you let it keep going.

You watched with confusion as Jamie’s eyes grew wide peering over your shoulder, “I’ve got to run now love.” He muttered, his thick accent mixed with both of your alcohol intake leaving you in confusion.

You could feel that burning feeling getting worse, palms slicking with nervous sweat. You turned around to to met with a wide chest clad in all black, tipping your head back your eyes danced over a familiar bearded chin up to a set of dark eyes that set you on fire. The familiar, gruff man grabbed your wrist, taking your drink and throwing it back himself before dragging you out to the porch.

Your feet were moving faster than your brain, still struggling to process if this was that recurring dirty dream you kept having, or a much more frightening reality. The cold nipping at your bare arms answered that one quickly— you were always on a beach in that dream.

Before you know it Roy had your back against the railing of a porch, body warmed from where it was trapped against his own. He brought his head down against yours, eyes screwed shut like he was in physical pain. You brought your hands against his chest, fists closed tightly around the material of his overpriced black suit jacket. He smelled familiar, like the cologne you had gotten him for his birthday.

“I’m such a fucking prick.” He muttered against your hair, bringing his hand to cradle the back of your head.

“Damn right.” You responded through a teary laugh against the side of his neck. “Proper fucking idiot you are.”

He let out a gruff laugh, hands coming up to cradle your face— pulling you back gently so he could look at you. His eyes were soft, that special look that he saved just for you painted across his face. You loved him so much that it physically hurt. Even after he took a knife and stabbed you in the chest.

Right person wrong time didn’t exist, because even through everything, Roy never stopped being your right person.

“I will spend every last day of my fucking life making this up to you. If you’ll have me back.” He muttered, eyes scanning your face with such sincere regret you might’ve fallen over if he wasn’t holding you up.

Maybe it was stupid to take him back, but you hadn’t realized until that very moment that Roy Kent owned a very large piece of you. And standing there in his arms, you had finally gotten it back.

[lenacosse]

Sirius black x reader that are in a secret relationship to not ruin their friendship, make it angsty, they pretend they don’t love each other and that it’s just secret sex (because the sex is fantastic) but they do love each other so much it consumes them.

Say don’t go…

pairing: sirius black x female reader

cw: brief smut, alcohol consumption, angst

word count: 3,295

(this is my first request so i hope it’s okay. hopefully this is what you were expecting!)

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You run your hands through Sirius’ hair as he pounds into you, the sound of your moans and the bed rocking against the wall fill the room. You feel yourself getting closer by the second, the tension in your stomach rapidly builds.

“Sirius,” you moan. “Im so close”.

“I know me too.” His thrusts get sloppier as he groans in your ear.

The tension in your abdomen releases as your whole body feels euphoric. Your moans get softer as you slowly come down from your high. Sirius gets faster, chasing his release, your legs shake around his waist as your nails dig into his shoulder pads. He lets out a deep moan and releases onto your thighs. Sirius gets dressed again, cleans you up and sits at the bottom of his bed handing you your clothes.

“You good to walk?” Sirius asks, passing you your jumper.

“I’m good, thanks pads.” You smile, what you said was only partially true. You knew you couldn’t stay, you never stayed that was one of the rules you gave yourself. For you having him in anyway at all is better than not having him. Even if it meant you had to hurt yourself every time by leaving.

“Alright, see you later. Remember if you see the boys on your way back tell them we were doing homework.”

You nod and give him a smile before leaving his dorm. Once you’re out your smile drops and your eyes water. Every time he doesn’t tell you to stay feels like a kick to the gut, you knew you were going around in circles with yourself. You were so undoubtedly in love with Sirius that you couldn’t even think straight. Any rational person would have ended the hooking up months ago, but you couldn’t get enough of it. It was the closest way to being with him and that moment when he’s undressing you, then touching you, and kissing you everything drifted away and all you felt was him. So you accepted the fact he only wanted one thing out of you, or so you thought because to everyone else it’s so obvious he loves you, anytime Sirius has liked a girl the only thing he would do is tease her and prank her. But he cared too much about you to do that, so instead he soaks up everything you have to say, he searches for your face in crowds, he values you opinions on literally anything and most of all he betters himself for you. However you couldn’t see that, and so he assumed you didn’t love him back.

“Where have you been?” Lily raises and eyebrow from behind her book as you walk into your dorm room, Mary is painting her nails and Marlene is finishing homework.

“Nowhere.” You reply and kick your shoes off. You sit on your bed avoiding eye contact with the girls, see you hadn’t exactly told them about you and Siriushe didn’t tell his friends, not even James. Yet Lily was catching on, she just knew but couldn’t prove it.

She puts her book down and goes to sit on your bed, she crosses her legs and sits directly in front of you. You look over to Mary who just shrugs in response.

“(Y/N) please just tell us. It’s so obvious,” Lily tried to get the truth from you.

“Tell you what?”

“You know what I’m talking about,” Lily sighed.

“No I don’t actually, I’m not psychic.”

“You and Sirius? You’re hooking up right?” Mary looks at you, her question circling in your head.

You just start laughing, looking at her as if she’s mad. A part of you felt embarrassed, how you saw it was that Sirius was embarrassed to be with you, so he never asked you out to Hogsmeade or told you to stay. And now your friends were catching on which made you feel nothing but a deep shame.

“I’d never get with Sirius.” You scoff.

“It’s so obvious you’re obsessed with him. Why can’t you just tell us?” Asks Lily

“Im not having this conversation. If you don’t believe me then that’s your problem.” You glare at Lily and Mary. Lily moves off your bed and goes back to her book, Marlene didn’t hear a thing from listening to a mixtape through her headphones.

As you lay awake to Merlin knows what hour as you think of Sirius. Not being with him would drive you mad, but there’s no way you could go on like this. Nothing made sense, if you told him how you felt and he didn’t feel the same way things would be weird. You valued your friendship with Sirius and his friends, your friend groups had just started to merge together. Especially now that Lily tolerates James, and you didn’t want to ruin that. But you also couldn’t lose Sirius, Sirius who brought out the best parts of you, Sirius who brought excitement and thrill into your life. Sirius who made you laugh until your sides hurt, but most of all Sirius who gives you life who lifts you up and makes you feel important. You needed him, so you came to the decision not to talk to him, maybe one day you’d have the courage.

———————————————————————

You walk into the common room to hear cheers and clapping. Your friends had thrown you a surprise party for your birthday, you couldn’t hold back the grin that spread across your face. Birthdays were a touchy topic for you considering your parents didn’t exactly care to celebrate, but you’ve found happiness in them since first year, and nothing made you feel more appreciated than seeing all their faces cheering for you.

“Happy birthday (Y/N/N)!” Remus smiled, pulling you into a hug.

“Thank you. Whose idea was this?” You ask taking the drink that Mary forced into your hand.

“Mine.” Sirius walked over to you and Remus. He nudged you with his elbow. “Happy birthday.” He winked. You smiled into your cup trying to defuse the blush that was creeping up over your cheeks. You looked up to Remus who stood awkwardly watching the interaction.

“Im going to go..” he walked away. You turned your attention to Sirius.

“Was this really your idea?”

“What you think I don’t care about you? Lily was trying to get us to have a picnic for your birthday, that would’ve been awful.” You shrug as he said the first sentence, it took everything in you to not question how much he actually did care. But fighting wouldn’t solve anything right now.

“My saviour.” You roll your eyes playfully, Sirius excuses himself and you scan the room. It was packed with your friends and those in your year group, the smell of cigarettes and cheap alcohol filled your senses as the record player that Marlene has filled the room with ABBA, you leaned against the wall a content smile resting on your face. The reality that Sirius had planned this made you have butterflies, maybe he did feel something for you.. or maybe you were reading in to it too much but regardless you wouldn’t dare act on it.

Marlene walks over to you already half cut, you couldn’t help but laugh as she tumbled into some Slytherins.

“There she is, birthday girl.”

“Drunk already marls?” You tease.

“Of course I am.”

“Why are you standing alone, come sit with us.”

“I was just seeing who was here,” you replied and followed her to your group of friends. There sat James, Lily, Mary and now you and Marlene.

You played a game of never have I ever which of course ended in someone getting absolutely plastered. Surprisingly that person was James who drank to some really concerning things, which you absolutely planned to hold over his head.

“You should talk to Sirius.” James blurts out, Lily smacks him hard in the arm causing a groan to escape his mouth as he flicked her cheek.

“What are you talking about?” You sigh, topping up your drink with fire whiskey. It burned its way down your system as you took a sip, making you shiver.

“Watching you two is a complete disaster,” James tutted.

“There is no us. We’re friends, that’s all.” You scoff. You look over your shoulder to see Sirius standing there with a gift present, his face drops as you turn around. Before you know it he’s gone up the stairs.

You rack your brain trying to understand what just happened, until you realise he heard everything you just said. But that didn’t make sense. Sirius wasn’t into you, so why did he look at you like his whole world has shattered? You get up from your seat and head upstairs after him, you knock on his door and slowly open it.

“Sirius?” You call out walking into his dorm.

He turns to face you, a bottle of fire whiskey in his hand. He smiles at you, but he looked upset, you could tell by his eyes.

“Everything okay?” You walk to him. Sitting next to him, he passes you the bottle of fire whiskey. You take a swig, your throat and eyes burning from the sensation.

“Of course.” He replies flatly.

“Are you sure?”

“Just drop it.”

“Sorry.” You sigh. You awkwardly pull on your sleeves, the silence between you both is consuming you. “Lily thinks we’re hooking up. Can’t keep anything from her.”

“What did you tell her.”

“I said I’d never,” you cringe as the words came out of your mouth. You internally kick yourself, who the fuck says that?

“Of course you did.” Sirius scoffs.

“What do you mean?” You look at him, you look him in the eye, his eyes hold so much emotion in them that it makes your heart hurt. It was in that moment you realise what you’ve done. He loved you. He adored you. Yet sitting here looking at him you watch that love and adoration die. “Sirius..”

“Don’t.” He looks away. His eyes burning holes into the wall. Without looking at you he gives you the present bag, you take it and leave the room. Not daring to say anything that would make matters worse.

You stand against the wall, with shaky hands and open the present. You heart drops once you see it, he wrote you a poem, the poem talks about the little things you do that he adores. Reading it makes your head hurt, you feel like the worst person ever, you’ve frankly never felt shame like it. You can’t hold the tears that fall from your eyes, in the bag is also a bracelet, it has red ruby stones in it, seeing it makes your heart shatter even more. You go to your dorm, to catch a breath. Which entails you first starting at your present and crying, then trying to think of something to do but you ultimately decide that you needed to give Sirius space, talking it through is the worst decision. So you go back to the party soon after and the only thing you do is drink. You have never felt more ashamed, so of course you pity drink which leads to you being an absolute mess, but it kept your feelings at bay somehow.

“I think you’ve had enough (Y/N),” James says trying to pry the bottle off you.

“Fuck off.” You slur taking another swig.

“Seriously give me the bottle. This is ridiculous.”

“James. Fuck off.”

James just sighs and accepts defeat, you keep looking for Sirius. But you can’t see him that is until you’re sitting talking to Marlene who’s just a drunk as you are, suddenly you hear a bunch of cheering. You look over to where the noise is coming from and there’s a group of people circled around. Out of curiosity you get up to see, you stumble over and squeeze your way to get a good view. You see Sirius and this girl throwing back shot after shot, he catches your eye and gives you a cold glare. The act gives you goosebumps and makes your skin crawl, as he’s still looking at you he grabs the girl by the collar and they share a very passionate kiss. Your stomach churns and your vision blurs, you feel an arm grab you and next thing you know you’re in your dorm, uncontrollably sobbing.

“Drink this,” Remus gives you a cup of water, you take a little sip in between your sobs.

“I ruined everything,” you sob, “Sirius is never going to talk to me again.”

“He might.” Remus shrugged.

“Well aren’t you just so helpful.” You poke his chest. He gives you some tissues and sits with you until you pass out from all the crying you’ve done. Remus felt bad for you but he knew Sirius would eventually come around, he just needed time to be defiant.

——————————————————————

Two weeks has passed since your birthday, two weeks of torture. Everything between your friend group was so awkward you stopped sitting with them at breakfast, lunch and dinner. Sirius upright refused to acknowledge your existence and anytime he looked at you it would be countered by him snogging his new girlfriend. Lily had tried to force you to talk to him but you couldn’t bare it, you also cried yourself to sleep most nights, you knew it was your fault but that didn’t make it hurt any less.

“(Y/N)?” Marlene snapped her fingers in front of your face, startled you jumped a little and look at her.

“What?!” You snapped.

“You’re supposed to be quizzing Lily.” You sigh and look at Lily, she offers you a sympathetic smile and hands you her flash cards. You, Marlene and Lily were in the library studying for upcoming mocks. Except you couldn’t focus.

“You know what. I’m sick of this. Go talk to him.” Lily snapped, she had been trying to get through to you every single day since your party.

“I told you already, there is no point he won’t talk to me.” You fire back.

“No. There absolutely is. This is getting ridiculous! I can’t stand it, you have two choices. Stop sulking or go talk to him!”

“You don’t understand!”

You quickly realise all the people in the library are staring at you, you duck your head in embarrassment until you hear someone clear their throat behind you. You turn around and see Madam Pince standing with her arms crossed.

“You three out. Now. This is a library show some respect!”

You all scramble to collect your things and rush out of the library. You feel the eyes of students on the back of you head but you didn’t care, anymore.

“Look what you’ve done. I swear (Y/N) if you don’t go talk to him I’ll force you both into our dorm and lock the door until things get sorted.” Says Lily as she angrily walks beside you and Marlene back to the Gryffindor tower.

“You’re the one that started shouting not me.”

“I wouldn’t have to shout if you would just do the right thing.”

“Can you two both stop. Seriously, Lily I agree with you but she won’t do anything she doesn’t want to do.”

“Thank you Marls.”

“I’m not defending you here.”

You roll your eyes at Marlene and the three of you burst out laughing, Lily apologies for shouting at you but you understood her reasoning. At the end of the day things weren’t going to work out between you and Sirius if you didn’t try to fix things.

———————————————————————

You pound your fist at the door rapidly for the third time, on the other side of the door you can hear music playing. Eventually after you’ve knocked so much that your knuckles have swollen the door opens.

“Ah the woman of the hour. What can I do for you m’lady?” James teases

You roll your eyes at him. “Is Sirius here?”

“He is.” James looks over his shoulder back at Sirius. “One second.”

James shuts the door and you stand waiting outside, you hear muffled voices and a few minutes later James opens the door again. “He can’t wait to talk to you. I’ll be in the common room.” James walks out of the door and you walk in, closing it behind you.

“Hi.” You say softly awkwardly standing at the foot of Sirius’ bed.

“What do you want?”

You sigh and think of what to say. “Im sorry.”

“For?”

“You know what for.”

“Doesn’t ring a bell you’ll have to remind me.” You stay silent looking at Sirius waiting for him to crack a smile, but he doesn’t. You forgot how petty he can be. “Go on.”

“Im sorry for saying we’re just friends,”

“…okay.”

“Is that all you’re going to say?”

“There’s nothing else to say.”

“Sirius come on. You know how I feel about you.”

“No actually I don’t. You never ever made an effort to show me, all you wanted to do was fuck and then you’d leave right after.”

“You pushed me away!”

“I was doing what you wanted me to. You said it yourself were only friends there’s nothing between us.”

“No. Don’t do that. I wanted you to tell me to stay, I wanted you to want me. You don’t even like me so why did you write me that poem Sirius?”

He stands up walking towards you. “Because it’s not simple with you (Y/N).”

“What do you mean?”

“All the boys you like are refined and smart. I’m neither of those things.”

“I don’t care if you’re smart!” You gesture with your hands. “You make me laugh Sirius, you make me feel important.”

“Then why didn’t you say that?”

“Because I liked our friendship too much to sabotage that. Plus I never thought you’d actually like me.”

“Bullshit.”

“What?”

“That’s bullshit. I done so much to show you I liked you.”

“Like what?”

“I read those books you like, I listened to the music you like, I listened to you talk about the things that you’re interested in.”

“That’s what friends do Sirius! That has nothing to do with liking me.”

“To me it does.”

“…well I’m sorry. But please stop hating me, I can’t bare it anymore.” Your voice cracked and you eyes welled up.

“I don’t hate you.” He replied softly, taking your hand.

You look down biting your lip as a tear escapes your eyes, Sirius lifts your chin with his hand gently and wipes your tear.

“Im sorry too.”

You let out an airy laugh. “For what? You didn’t do anything.”

“I should’ve heard you out.”

“I understand why you didn’t.” The silence fills the room again, you look up at him your expression soft. “Please give me a chance? I know I was wrong, but I won’t let you down”

Sirius cups your face and kisses you softly, the kiss was intimate and soft. Not like your usual rough and intense kisses. He pulls you in a hand running down your back gently, you slowly pull back.

Suddenly the door cracks open and you look behind you, there stands Lily and James both with smug looks on their faces.

“Finally. Up top Evans?” James puts his hand up for a high five.

“Absolutely not.” Lily rolls her eyes. You look back at Sirius and he cracks a smile. You felt beyond relieved that things are looking up, and the fact that Sirius doesn’t hate you makes everything better.

Lily drags James away and you kiss Sirius again. “You’ve no idea how relieved I am.”

“I think I have an inkling.” Sirius tucks a strand of your hair behind your era. “I love you so much, seriously it’s freighting.”

“Trust me, I understand. I love you too.”

[moneymartin]

PLEASE PLEASE do a kate martin fic where the reader is her ex and they cannot stay away from each other. like “uh oh” by tate mcrae PLEASE

・❥・- favorite bad decision

summary: you see kate at a practice after the two of you split

warnings: nfsw mdni. 18+ as fawk! but the smut is kinda short sozzzz

rpf. don’t read it if you don’t feel comfortable

a/n: i’m negl all my kate fics are fluffy cause i cannot see myself writing smut. (but i try to deliver so this sucks cuz i got a lil uncomfy) 😭 also i’m sorry for lacking on my writing im so stressed w all these exams im taking and some family problems. this also might go off track cause i wrote this half asleep 😕 didn’t know how to end this one too

stars are the skips :)

it’s been 5 months. 5 stupid months since that relationship you refused to let go ended. you couldn’t believe it either when your girlfriend suddenly said “we need to breakup.”. she never told you why, despite the multiple calls and texts you sent when she left the morning after that were begging for her to come back or at least explain why she felt that way.

you felt like absolute shit.

it was a long relationship, your longest one too. it was the fact you believed it would last forever. you wished for it to last when you saw those repeated numbers and whenever a star dotted across the sky. you believed in those silly little things, but you only believed in them for this stupid 1.5 year period.

everything felt like it had been going your way during those times. you felt alive again after meeting kate. she was the definition of a literal ball of sunshine when it came to you. constantly bringing you to her basketball games, showing you off to her friends and teammates, introducing you to her family. things were great. the feeling was refreshing, especially after being in probably the worst relationship of your life.

a guy played you behind your back so many times and you were unable to figure out yourself. the second you did, you didn’t even know why or what to do. you struggled with school from the thought of never finding out what he thought was weird about you or why he even considered doing that in the first place. you treated him like he was the best boyfriend in the world!

then kate had dug you out of a hole you thought you’d never have the guts or the fucking courage to get out of.

“there’s nothing wrong with you trying to get your mind off of it y’know.” jada says. shes been helping you cope with this thing even though her and kate are the closest people ever. she’d never tell a single soul anything you always talk to her about. “coming to our last game in carver won’t be that bad!”

“yeah, not so bad until i see kate! you know how i feel about her, jades. it hurts.” you murmur and swipe the back of your hand against your face. there’s a painful feeling at the bottom of your stomach and it makes your skin crawl uncomfortably. “i’m not going and there’s nothing you can do to change my mind.”

jada’s face contorts into a half smile when she hears the way you talk about the whole shebang. she knows you that still can’t let it go, and she wishes so badly that you could let kate go. “right.” she breathes out and grinds her teeth together. “you don’t need to come.”

but you do anyways.

you sat there at court side awkwardly, watching the hawkeyes train before their final home game. you only saw caitlin, hannah, gabbie, syd, and kylie. jada was sitting next to you and cheering on her teammates. thankfully, you didn’t spot kate anywhere close or on the court at all.

until you fucking did.

kate walked in through the tunnel and dropped her gym bag on the floor, a loud thud echoing through the arena. she had her hair up in that same stupid braid, that same stupid smirk on her face, and that same stupid look in her eyes. you hated her so fucking much and you hated the fact that you couldn’t stop thinking about her no matter how hard you tried to.

that churn in the stomach made you feel like you had level 1000 cramps, but it was just that feeling you got when you felt absolutely sick to the core. sick because you didn’t know what, or how to feel after seeing kate again. it was the shitty feeling of not knowing why she even chose to leave you in the first place. it was the feeling of frustration when you saw her smile again. the feeling of confusion rushing back to you. you felt like a small child getting yelled at when she broke up with you, it was when nothing made sense at all to you. when you didn’t get the answer you wanted after multiple tries of begging for it.

you didn’t understand it, and you still don’t.

“you alright?” jada snaps you out of whatever the hell you were thinking about and you jump slightly, eyes diverting away from kate. “yeah, why wouldn’t i be?” you huff and smile with your teeth out. your body starts to grow numb and you feel as if you can’t breathe as well as you normally would, which jada notices. she grabs your shoulders tightly and places her palm on the side of your face to move your head towards hers. she knows you’re staring at kate. “you’re not fine.”

thanks captain obvious.

“yeah, obviously not!!!” you blurt out way too loud. it makes everything and everyone around you stop. the sound of the balls dribbling against the floor and the continuous chatter around you just stops. everything is silent and you know that its because of you. your face flushes at the embarrassment you feel and you step off onto the court, walking towards the exit. the sound of footsteps follow you and you don’t even have the guts to turn around. it seriously feels like you’re about to get completely flamed for acting out at a clear statement about what you felt.

but it’s not jada. or caitlin. it’s fucking kate.

a wave of anger and bitterness rushes through you like no other, and you can’t tell whether to be upset or nervous about this little interaction. you still love kate and you know that. “you like to yell, huh?” she chuckles and pushes your shoulder lightly. when her hand touches you, you don’t move away and just let her do it.

“lighten up, will ya?” kate’s lips curl up into the damn smirk again and she looks at you with those eyes. the eyes that she knows you can’t say no to, the eyes that got you hooked in the first place. “i missed when you acted up like that, to be honest.”

you’ve missed her touch so badly, but you just can’t admit it.

there’s a lot of things you acknowledge in life. things that you know. you know whats right and wrong when it comes to decisions and when it comes to certain things like seeing people you know you aren’t supposed to.

but you know that this is right. it always has been.

promises are always broken too, and this was one you swore you’d never break. it was hard, especially because kate was the hottest fucking person on the planet. saying ‘no’ to her was practically impossible. she asked you to come over after the game and you happily complied. which was a horrible idea.

“you’re such a fuckin’… asshole.” you whine out and let out a bated breath. your body shivers when kate’s fingers run up and down underneath your shirt and when her breath hits your sopping core. she’s in between your legs and eating you out like a madwoman. your head falls back into her pillows, fingers gripping tight at the roots of her hair and the bedsheets on the side of your body. “am i?” she mumbles, sending vibrations through your body that you haven’t felt in months.

that feeling is so good. and you know it. you missed it when kate acted up too. seeing her all tough on the court made something reignite in your stomach again, and it exploded when you saw her in the locker rooms. you literally dragged her out of there while she was in the middle of a conversation with addi and into your car. you couldn’t even wait before your lips were eagerly on hers and her hands were roaming in all the right places.

“yeah, you are. you fucking bitch…..” your voice goes up an octave the moment kate licks a stripe up your pussy and starts leaving hickeys around your thighs and stomach. “i tried ignoring you when i saw you at the club last week. all i wanted to do was jump into your arms and kiss your face off.” you admit awkwardly and let out a quiet cry the moment your stomach turns into knots. you’re close and she can feel it, her head diving down again while you absentmindedly hump at her face.

“shit!” you whimper and prop your head up, watching kate lap up every last drop of your cum. “i got you, baby,” she breathes out heavily onto your stomach. her breath is warm and she presses her cheek up against it when she feels your legs shake. her thumb rubs your sides and she looks up at you, rising up slightly and keeping herself steady with her hands. yours grabbing at her shoulders. when she keeps herself up you can feel her arms bulging underneath her shirt and she leans in. “mmf.. that’s my girl.”

her tongue swirls around yours, making you taste yourself all the way before the moment turns over quickly. “mhm..” you hum and slide your hands down her arms to get a feel again. the second you pull away, kate’s eyes go from feral to soft. she leans back and searches around on her floor, picking up your undergarments and sliding them on for you. “it’s okay.” she smiles and moves her head towards you. kate rests her head on your chest, chin in between and her arms around your stomach while your fingers cup her face.

you’re never gonna be able to stop forgiving her if she keeps doing this to you. and you know it.

[charles-simmons-fanfiction]

A cup of hot coffee - Paul Bäumer / Female Reader

Description: Paul was caught stealing from the farm, again. Fortunately, the daughter of the farmer sympathized with him. [fluff, slight angst, oneshot, 3k words]

Omg, this is literally so self indulgent. Just saying but I only watched the 2022 movie, so I'm sorry if this isn't accurate to the book or to the other movie. Might also not be the most historically accurate thing either, bc I think the famers probably wouldn't speak his language, but hey, this is a tumblr fic.

Hope you enjoy it and pls let me know if you do, it always means a lot! <3

Part I

Paul was almost reaching another egg when he heard the door opening. He turned around instantly. Before he even saw a person, he saw the rifle.

No words came out of his mouth as his eyes widened and he raised his hands to the air, dropping the egg. It broke on the floor. He gulped.

"Don't do any movement, or I will shoot" It was too dark to see who was talking, but the voice was of a woman. On one hand, that probably made it easier to escape. On the other hand, Paul hadn't seen a woman in months and was caught off guard.

"Do you have any weapons with you?" Her tone was firm and she had the rifle pointed at him. He shook his head no. "I don't believe you"

Paul sensed he had no choice. "I have a knife."

"Throw it on the ground, away from you"

He did as she said and looked at her again. As his eyes adjusted to the light, he started to see who was at the door. She was no older than nineteen.

"What's your name, soldier?"

"Paul Bäumer" He kept his voice steady, but low. "I apologize, ma'am. I am very hungry"

"Bäumer, you'll get to live another day" She didn't lower the gun, just stepped away from the door. He hesitated, only walking towards it when he was sure she wouldn't shoot. She stopped him just before he could leave, "You're very lucky you didn't wake up my dad. Don't come back again if you care about your life," and stepped back again.

He nodded in silence and left. As soon as he was outside, he sprinted away, with just one egg on his pocket and a rumbling stomach.

---

That was at least three weeks ago and the soldier had, in fact, not come back. Or at least you didn't notice if he did.

Your dad was in the nearest city, and probably would only be back by tomorrow. There were more chores to do than usual, but you didn't mind. Your day had already been quite productive, so you calmly folded the laundry while you waited for the water to boil for coffee.

Then the dog started barking and you heard a loud thud. You quickly grabbed the rifle and ran outside. The barn's door was slightly open.

"Who's there?" You asked, raising your voice as you entered the barn.

You found a soldier, getting up from the floor, his uniform stained in blood.

"Don't shoot!" He was quick to ask, raising his hands. For a moment you were confused, until you finally recognized him as the same soldier from before. He looked like he had been to hell and back, and he probably did.

His eyes found yours and you were left speechless. His whole face was covered in dust, mud and dry blood.

"Are you alright??" The soldier stared at you in confusion, not quite sure what to answer to that. Giving it a second thought, it was actually a pretty stupid question, so you didn't expect an answer. "You're Bäumer or something, right? I had told you not to come back."

"I deeply apologize, ma'am" His voice was shaky, although he managed to keep a collected posture. You should probably just shoot him, that was the smartest and safest thing to do at the moment. Still, you couldn't get yourself to pull the trigger. You sighed.

If you weren't going to shoot him, you should at least just tell him to leave, but if he had come back once, he'd do it again. There was a moment of tense silence between the two.

"Would you like a cup of coffee?"

"What?"

You lowered the rifle and gestured for him to follow you. Every part of you was telling you that was a terrible idea. Letting a man, more specifically a soldier, into your house while you were alone was, at the very least, completely reckless. But there was also another part of you that felt terribly bad for the guy.

He didn't move for a few instants. "C'mon," you rushed him and he started walking, glancing at the weapon in your hand, which you made sure to keep close to you even after you entered the kitchen, holding the door open for him.

You simply gestured at a chair for him to sit down and started to make coffee for both of you. The two remained in silence, and you would make sure to keep him in your sight. It was hard not to notice how much he was shaking. At first you wondered if it was out of fear or something, then you came to the conclusion he was just freezing. Now, giving it more attention, his lips seemed to be already slightly purple.

"Do they not give you food over there in the trenches?" You broke the ice.

"They do, but rarely enough for everyone"

You nodded. "Tell me, how old even are you, Private Bäumer? You're a Private, right?"

"Yes, I am," he quickly said. "And I'm seventeen."

"Pretty much my age," you thought, but didn’t say out loud. You took his cup of coffee and handed it him.

At first he didn't drink it. He held the cup with his two hands, feeling the heat of it. Then slowly took a sip. You could swear his eyes were teary.

"Thank you, ma'am." His voice was sheepish, shaky almost.

"You're welcome. I'll get us some bread too" You looked for it as you spoke, then shared some with him.

The soldier was fast to eat it. He didn't seem to be lying about not having enough food. You took your time as you drank your coffee, trying not to feel pity towards him.

He looked out the window, and sighed.

"I should go back now, before it starts to get dark," Bäumer downs the rest of the coffee. "Thank you, again. I owe you a lot for this"

"If you want to thank me, then don't come back"

He nodded. "You won't be seeing me again"

There was both a huge sense of relief in hearing that and a slight disappointment. It was easier if he actually didn't come back though.

Private Bäumer got up and stared at you for a few instants. "Have a good day, ma'am."

"You too." The words were merely something polite to speak and you knew it, although you wish he could actually have a good day. He didn't look like he had had any it's been long time.

You opened the door for him and gave him a small smile. He smiled back, the tears now not so visible on his face, and you thought that maybe you wouldn't regret any of this at all.

"Before I leave, what's your name? Since you know mine"

You silently considered on whether you should answer it or not, then spoke. "My name's y/n"

Part II

The next time Paul saw you, he didn’t plan on trying to steal from you or anything. He wasn't even sure what he was doing. All he knew is that he couldn't sleep even if he wanted to, and for some reason he wanted to see you again.

As much as he loved his friends, he missed talking to someone outside of all the war. He missed feeling like just another guy instead of a soldier. And he missed talking to girls too.

So he was walking towards the farm, knowing that it was a terrible idea.

"She didn't shoot me the last two times," he thought. "Maybe third time will be the one."

On the way there, he almost stepped on a beautiful white flower. Barely noticeable in the snow. Paul stopped and knelled next to it, then carefully picked it. "I could give it to her as a way of saying 'thank you for the coffee'," he considered, "or at least as a 'sorry, I'm here again.'"

"I'm definitely getting shot" was his final conclusion as he kept walking anyway.

Then he saw you, and Christ, he needed to pull his shit together. He instantly felt anxious. It was embarrassing, really. "It's just a girl existing, chill."

Paul took a deep breath, looked around, and walked up to you.

"Good afternoon"

You screamed and turned around, pointing the shovel in your hands towards him. When you saw it was him again, you almost yelled, but was interrupted by the voice of an old man coming from inside the house.

"You okay??"

"Yes, dad. The dog sneaked up on me!" You yelled back with the best excuse you could think of.

"Sorry, I didn't think this through" Paul tries to apologize, but is cut off by you pushing him to the barn.

You close the door behind both of you and when you looked at him again you could swear you had never hated a soldier this much. "What are you doing here?? I was nice for not shooting you dead and you can't keep a promise to simply not come back?!"

Paul opened his mouth to defend himself, and closed it again. He probably looked like a kid being yelled at and he couldn't help but cringe at himself.

"You'll stay here until my dad goes to sleep, because if he sees you, he will kill you and I'll let him," You warned harshly. "Actually, no, I highly encourage you to leave, it'd make us both a favor if that happened."

The door is slammed after you leave and Paul takes a few instants to think about what happened, his heart still beating way too fast. He looked around and sat down on the ground, feeling hungry but not daring to steal anything. The flower had probably fallen somewhere.

---

You watched in silence the soldier who had fallen asleep in your barn, taking courage to actually wake him up.

Bäumer actually looked only slightly better than last time and he smelled terrible. One could easily find him like this and assume he's dead. You sighed and sat next to him, with your head on your knees, wondering what you were even doing.

Were you really this lonely? So desperate for any sort of human interaction with someone your age that you'd do something this stupid? That was pathetic, there was no good reason for you to be helping this guy.

"Are you alright, ma'am?"

You flinched and quickly moved away. "Yes. I thought you were asleep"

"I was, kind of. I sleep very lightly just in case" He explains.

You nod with a sigh. "Were you out of food again?"

"I mean, we always are, but I came here to... I don't even know, talk?" He visibly cringed at his own words.

"Well, Private Bäumer, that was stupid of you" You couldn't help but feel annoyed at his presence. Although not annoyed enough to kick him out already.

"Call me just Paul, no one calls me like that"

"You call me ma'am, so it sounded appropriate"

"Touché, y/n" He smiled a little, not looking directly at you.

There was silence. You looked at him carefully, analyzing every detail. The mud under his nails, the dark circles under his blue eyes, the chapped lips.

"He's probably good looking when he's clean," you thought, almost immediately feeling guilty about it and looking away.

"How's life here? I suppose it is very calm," he still didn't look at you as he spoke.

"It is, usually. Recently there's been this dude who won't stop trespassing though. It's annoying as shit"

Paul chuckled. "Really? What a jerk! It must've been awful!"

"I know right? People these days are unbelievable!" You said dramatically.

He sat up with a smile. "Good thing the army's around! I'm sure the soldiers would help!" You snickered, rolling your eyes and suddenly not being that mad at him anymore.

Surprisingly, the conversation lasted for at least another couple hours, which felt like just a few minutes. As time went on, Paul started to talk more about himself and so did you.

You couldn't help but notice he had a beautiful smile.

Part III

"I brought a bottle of water, if you want some."

"I do. Thank you," he took the bottle and drank a least half of it in one go.

You two were walking in the woods, something you have been doing a lot recently. At least once a week, he would find a way to escape the trenches and you would do the most chores you could in the morning to have some free time later.

As it turns out, Paul was really nice. For the most part at least. He could also be annoying as much as he could be shy.

"I think you might actually be in love with me," he stated matter-of-factly out of nowhere.

"Excuse me?" You laughed, indignant.

"I'm just saying, I think you are," his voice was so sweet it barely even sounded sarcastic. "You like me too much."

"That's a problem?" You raised an eyebrow, curious on where he was going with this.

"Maybe. I don't know," he kept his eyes on anywhere but you, while you couldn't keep your eyes on anything but him. "Just doesn't feel like the brightest idea."

"Well, you don't have to worry about that," you chuckled and, this time, he looked back at you. For a few instants, you two just kept eye contact, feeling comfortable enough to not say anything.

Paul looked away first, maybe a bit embarrassed. "If you say so"

Everything felt lighter on those moments. Just chatting about whatever came to mind, from the most frivolous subjects to the deepest ones. And life wouldn't feel so lonely.

You listened to Paul's voice attentively. Wondering how was it even possible for you to like a person this much.

---

That night, there was another attack.

You barely got any sleep. The trenches were miles away, but you could see the lightning of the bombs in the sky. You closed the windows and prayed, trying your best to not cry or think of the worst.

---

The days passed excruciatingly slowly. You didn't get any news of Paul and was trying to at least keep focused on the chores and helping your dad with the farm. You had honestly never missed anyone like this and it was agonizing.

One day, after your dad went to sleep, you sneaked out again, needing air. You leaned back against the wall with your hands in your face and your eyes tightly closed.

You didn't sleep much that night either, or the one after that, not even in the whole week afterwards. For some moments, you tried to just accept Paul's probably dead. To simply go through whatever grief has to happen and move on. But then you would find something else to do and distract yourself from the idea. You wasn't sure why you even cared that much about a soldier whose fate was most likely always going to be this one.

Soon the sun would set again, ending another day. You were alone and had just decided to heat up water for coffee when you heard the dog barking. At first you brushed it off, but he kept barking. You sighed deeply, annoyed that you'd have to go outside.

"What is it, Otto?" You took the rifle, went outside and started looking around for you dog or why he was barking. It probably wasn't anything, as it usually wasn't.

A noise came from behind you and you quickly turned around, but before you could react any further, you felt something covering your mouth and stopping you from screaming.

"It's me, don't scream," it took a few instants to calm down and see who was really in front of you.

He took his hand off your face and you dropped the rifle on the floor to hug him.

"I'm so, so relieved to see you, Paul," your words came out muffled by how tightly you had your face pressed against his shoulder.

He was left completely in shock and took a way too long time to wrap his arms around you back. At first he was hesitant, but when he finally held you with the same strength you did, you could hear quiet crying. You couldn't even remember what had been the last time you felt human touch and it was so warm.

"Me too," he whispered. You could feel his hand on your hair. You would have to bathe again soon, but that was the last thing on your mind.

When you pulled away, the first thing you looked at were his eyes. You could never get tired of watching them.

"I know, I know. I look like shit right now," Paul said apologetically. You shook your face and put your hands on his cheek.

"No, you look great," his eyes widened and he couldn't get any word out of his mouth. "Maybe in need of a bath, but still great." You added with a small smile.

The sun was now almost gone and everything was quiet. Paul leaned against your hand and closed his eyes for a few seconds. Enjoying the silence and the comfort before he lost it again.

There were still tears on his eyes as he slowly opened them again. You gently brushed the tears away and he looked away with a embarrassed laugh.

You leaned in very slowly, giving him all the chances to pull away. But he didn't, and as he leaned closer too, you knew how much he wanted this.

Paul's lips were so soft pressed against yours. His hands made their way to your hair again and you closed your eyes. Your noses bumped and you could feel his smile as you kissed. Neither of you knew how to do this, but that didn't feel like a problem. He was here, alive, and you two had a life ahead of you to figure it out.

Both of you remained silent after you parted, still close to each other and trying to calm your heartbeats. You looked up at him again, and he did the same. There was so much you wanted to say, and not much you could get out of your mouth. Why was it always like that?

"Would you like a cup of coffee?" was what you asked.

Paul smiled. God, his smile was beautiful.

"I'd love to, please"

[cocogum]

The Great Wave - Chapter 3 Review

‼️ SPOILERS FOR THE CHAPTER ‼️

Warning(s): extreme use of foul language.

Aurora is not pregnant.

I don’t believe it for a second, that cow is lying through her teeth. I already mentioned in the second chapter review that she just couldn’t be pregnant because there are three major reasons that easily disprove her claim.

First, it’s the amount of time that passed by. It has been a few months since Season 4 and the manga, around four months to be exact. And yet, Aurora’s stomach appears to be completely flat. How is this possible? Shouldn't there be a visible bump by now?

Second, season 3’s artbook already confirmed that Aurora was a manipulative woman and wanted to reflect it with her design (by having her hair covering one of her eyes) so who’s to say she’s telling the truth right now??

Third, @kilfeur pointed out in this post that if she was pregnant, Armand would not have allowed her to fly high up in the cloudy sky to gain knowledge about the Eliatrope goddess' eliaculus. Armand was already worried about Aurora when she went up, and the thought of her flying high while carrying their future child would have made him refuse the idea entirely, as he feared it could put their unborn child in danger.

So yeah, this skank is clearly lying her ass off just to manipulate the sadidas so that they could take her side. She’s so fucking petty omg I cannot deal with her. And her father is even worse my god wipe that ugly ass smile off your face you fatass.

This man clearly wants power that’s outside his kingdom. He just wants more even if it doesn’t belong to him and it painfully shows because he won’t stop making this fart face.

But it’s okay because as soon as Amalia opens her mouth, he immediately stops looking like a dumbass and immediately FROWNS because he knows she’s spitting FACTS.

And this is the only reason why I loved this moment. Amalia literally put him in his place and shut him up.

Amalia on the first panel: “What right do you return after you have shamelessly abandoned us? The osamodas kingdom, the nations of Bonta, Brakmar, Amakna, Astrub…”

Amalia on the second panel: “We asked you to come help us!”

Amalia on the third panel: “BUT NO ONE CAME! It was the future of the world that was at stake, not just the Sadida Kingdom!!!”

LIKE YES GIRL YES FUCKING DESTROY THIS OLD WASTE OF SPACE!!!

She literally dragged him on the fucking floor with all these facts omg I can’t she’s such a queen I love her so much. 💖💖

But then, instead of just taking it all like a good boy, this old bag of furry bones only had one thing to say and it was:

Osamodas blue cow king: “You give honor to your egocentrism, Amalia…”

Bruh what.

What are you talking about, you crusty old bat?

She drops so many facts and events that happened and this guy’s only comeback is “you’re being selfish 🥺😡”. Like what the fuck was even that???

Dude if you’ve got nothing to say, then don’t say anything but don’t just blurt out the first thing that comes out of your mouth??? Like what??

This is the equivalent of a detective who presented all the proofs that you committed the crime and the only thing you have to say is “your mama”.

Then, as if things couldn’t get any worse for this guy, he says:

Osamodas blue cow king: “My soldiers would have beat these creatures just as efficiently as yours.”

Oh yeah, where were they then, you fucking liar??? The worst part about this is that you didn’t even try hiding the fact that you would’ve been ‘ready’ but you’re so dumb you have no idea how brain-dead that makes you sound right now. You’re saying you could’ve sent your men BUT YOU DIDN’T DO SHIT. WHAT’S WORSE IS THAT YOU KNEW THE SADIDAS NEEDED HELP CUZ UR STUPID DAUGHTER FLED TO GO BACK TO YOU.

Also didn’t you once claim that Armand’s army was weaker than yours but then all of a sudden you’re now saying that your army could’ve beat the necromes like theirs did???

(oh oop- Armand don’t kill him yet 😭)

Bitch doesn’t even know what he’s talking about anymore. I doubt he even knows wtf he’s saying half the time.

Are you dumb???? Are you actually suffering from constipation????

You’re implying that you were free to help and that you knew they needed help. YOU’RE INDIRECTLY SAYING THAT YOU KNEW AND DIDN’T HELP DESPITE HAVING THE TIME TO DO SO.

While the old fart is yapping, Yugo’s face is just so 🫤😑 I’ve been staring at this panel for 2 minutes now and I love how fucking out of it he looks while listening to the cow 😭 Actually, I’m not even sure if he’s listening, I think he’s just hearing him from one ear but it all goes out on the other side. He looks like a god who’s about to squash an annoying ass ant lol

He’s literally like “is this bitch fr?”

Like Yugo is 100% confident to say that the osamodas king had no idea what the hell he was talking about when he thought his troops and he would’ve been able to fight off the necromes.

Yugo: “You have absolutely no idea what we saved you from!”

Yugo’s making that face cuz he knows the king has no clue what he’s barking about. (Also can’t Yugo just use his wakfu sensing abilities to check if Aurora is actually carrying another twelvian?? Or is he not able to do that because an unborn child does not have wakfu yet?) Little blue bro doesn’t know what necromes even are cuz Yugo never told him about them so how the hell was he supposed to know if his men would’ve stood a chance???? No seriously is this cow okay? Why is he talking? Is he talking just for the sake of talking?? Is he that self-conscious that he’ll make up lies on the spot just to protect his image??? The cow king doesn’t even know that the necromes had a leader. Yugo and Amalia are dealing with a fucking grown-ass child omg.

Osamodas blond cow: “I left because I made the promise to my dear Armand.”

This is a lie. Armand never heard of any promise. An analysis conducted by @geekgirles even indicated otherwise, supporting that the claim made by Aurora was fake. According to the analysis, Aurora was more inclined towards her family than her new life with Armand, and the claim that he made any promises to her was baseless. If you wish to read the detailed analysis conducted by @geekgirles on this matter, you can find all of it in this post.

I’ll now explain to you, in my own words, why her bullshit is hot donkey ass. Keep in mind that the whole reason why she left was to protect “the child” aka “the future heir”. As I said before, Aurora couldn’t have promised Armand anything because he knew she still held a bit too much on her osamodas family. From what we’ve seen, Aurora had the time to go back to the Osamodas kingdom to check up on them because of the eliaculus in the skies, had sided with her osamodas family during the meeting with the eliatrope goddess, had tried to marry off Amalia to one of her brothers and cousin, deliberately brought some of her relatives to Armand’s coronation to….stand around, and even keeps her father around in the Sadida kingdom when he should either be ruling his own kingdom or go back to his cave. Armand is not a moron. He knows that she constantly brings her own family to a place that doesn’t need them. So when he’s about to sacrifice his life unbeknownst to Amalia, he tells her this:

“The future is yours.”

Armand had passed the torch to Amalia.

It's worth noting that this is a crucial moment because he chooses not to pass the leadership to his own wife, Aurora. This decision is based on the fact that Aurora is heavily influenced by her family and is unable to make independent choices. At the same time, he also chooses not to give it to someone else who is just as important.

And that is the imaginary baby that Aurora is carrying.

Remember that the baby doesn't exist, and that's an important fact to keep in mind. Armand, who still loves Aurora, doesn't trust her enough to give her the leading role, or any role for that matter, especially not one that involves a child they could potentially have together. Instead, he gave the role to his sister. Aurora knows this and is fully aware that her promise to him was never even a thing. In Armand’s mind, it wouldn't have mattered if she ran away because he never intended to give her a part of the kingdom’s responsibilities in the first place, even though her getting away like that would have hurt his heart.

And Aurora is over here saying that her dad will help her lead the sadidas while she’s pregnant, girl sit your ass down no one called for you. Hoe thought she was in the same group as freaking warriors, shut up. You clearly want your father to rule for a much longer time literally wtf.

Osamodas blond cow: “During my pregnancy, my father will help me lead the kingdom…and I also count on him to train the future heir.”

It's concerning that her explanation might make sense to the sadidas. I'm not sure how she managed it, but that skank made it sound like her father would automatically assist her in ruling the Sadida Kingdom (despite them being Osamodas) since she would be pregnant and without aid due to Armand's demise. And after her baby would be born, her father would train him under his guidance to make him become strong and successful. She made it sound like a simple plan with no problems attached to it. She hasn’t even mentioned if the “baby” was an osamodas or a sadida. She only mentioned the gender, that the baby was a male (in French, when she calls the unborn child “the heir” she says it by using male pronouns).

Hey, Aurora what happens when your lie doesn’t work anymore because your stomach will still stay flat after eight months? You’re gonna tell the people that you swallowed the baby or something? That it fell down? What happens when you can’t keep up with your lie anymore?? Huh? Ever thought about that, you dumb bitch?

I have an idea, Amalia: how about you throw Aurora to the other side of the world and then try to get yourself pregnant by using Yugo so that you can also have a better reason to stay? Or better yet, you can tell her to prove her pregnancy because again, HER STOMACH IS FLATTER THAN A WASHBOARD AFTER ALL THESE MONTHS. Make her suffer from her lie and try to make her work hard for it.

You know when a dog lifts his tail and head up while he’s walking away from something cuz it shows just how sassy and confident they are? I see no difference with this crappy blue cow ‘family’ except that it ain’t cute when they do it.

They just ignored everything Amalia and Yugo said, looked the other way from every proof and situation that they were currently in, and only brought out Aurora’s pregnancy as a trashy uno reverse card, then decided to dip out before blurting out that they were gonna wait NEXT TO ARMAND’S FUCKING TREE GRAVE SO AMALIA CAN PREPARE HER STUFF TO LEAVE.

Osamodas blonde cow: “We are going to pray at Armand’s grave tree, while you make your arrangements.”

The fucking nerve to say that.

I don’t give a shit if she’s crying while saying it, this bitch is supposed to be a professional manipulator.

She and her family have no shame whatsoever. They genuinely thought they did something there. The only thing they had as “leverage” against Amalia and Yugo was Aurora’s stupid “pregnancy”. And even if she was actually carrying Armand’s kid (for whatever reason), her reason would still be shit cuz Armand already declared in his final hour that Amalia was going to take his role.

Osamodas blond cow: “Your presence here is no longer desired, sister-in-law. Just do what you’ve always done…Go explore the world!”

Like-

Who are you???

Blond cow had the audacity to exist.

Not only do we know that the royal osamodas family are liars and manipulators, but we also now know that they’re complete dumbasses for even wanting to rule the Sadida kingdom of all kingdoms. The Sadida kingdom is not built like theirs. The Sadida culture and its customs are extremely different and very much the opposite of the Osamodas since these two races are polar opposites. The Sadidas care about plant life while the Osamodas care about wildlife. It would be extremely hard for the osamodas to fully accept a culture that preaches everything that opposes what they preach. Not only that, but the Sadida kingdom is the literal embodiment of nature. If anything tries to hit its source no matter how big or small, then there would be dire consequences to the entire ecosystem of the world. The Tree of Life is such a big deal in fact that Armand even nicknames it “the lungs of this world”.

And to protect it, you not only need to be one with nature, but that also means you need a SADIDA to guard it which is a person that can literally SPEAK FOR THE TREES. Aurora you NEED Amalia, not only because she’s a Sadida, but because she’s also a royal AND has the strongest connection to the tree more than any other sadidas. You’re not just ruling a kingdom, you’re taking care of the world’s core.

And Aurora’s father doesn’t seem to understand that very important detail. When Armand reveals to him that the sadida kingdom keeps getting targeted at all times because it represents the lungs of the world, this fucking dumbass cow thinks that it’s because the sadidas are weak and can’t protect their own home which is why it keeps getting attacked.

Aurora’s father is such an idiot that he doesn’t even understand why the kingdom is so precious when he’s just been TOLD THE ANSWER DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF HIS FUCKING FACE.

At this point, even a iop would get it. BECAUSE THE PERCEDAL FAMILY ACTUALLY UNDERSTOOD THE ASSIGNMENT-

This is why imagining an osamodas ruling the Sadida kingdom is a literal death sentence. Because an osamodas, someone who only takes care of beasts, shouldn’t be able to properly take care of the sacred tree that links every single living plant in the world. For fuck sake, Aurora, why do you think they call it “the Tree of LIFE”?????

If the Tree of Life doesn’t have a proper guardian (aka A FUCKING SADIDA), then it dies. And if it dies, that means the ecosystem dies. Aurora, you dumb blond, let me explain it in osamodas language: if every green that you see outside disappears, that means that your stupid animals won’t be able to properly eat, shit, reproduce, drink, breathe, and live. And yes, Aurora that last one also means that they won’t have a surface to walk on, aka death.

You don’t have a brain because you keep listening to your egocentric manipulative fat father every time he opens his mouth and you keep making constipated decisions without thinking about the later outcomes because you think you’re in control of the situation.

The only thing you can do, and I’m being generous here by giving you a “talent”, is to shut the fuck up and sit there looking pretty. You did a good job doing that in Season 4 and I want you to do that again. And while you’re at it, go make me a sandwi-

Not only does Aurora need Amalia, the sadida who has the strongest link to the Tree of Life, but the Osamodas king also needs Yugo. I’m not sure why these blue people didn’t catch the fact that there’s a gigantic ass necrome dragon that’s only been PARALYZED and is currently standing in the fucking Sadida Kingdom’s backyard. The dragon is very easy to spot and the only reason why Yugo still keeps the eliatrope dofus on him at all times is to prepare himself for when the dragon gets out of this state. Because yes, Armand did beat him, but he didn’t kill him. Again, you are not able to kill a necrome. If the royal Osamodas family somehow takes hold of the Sadida kingdom, how the fuck are they gonna beat a fucking dragon, one of the most powerful fucking entities of this world who also had been necrofied to NEVER FUCKING DIE??? The osamodas cow king never saw a necrome, never beat a necrome, doesn’t know how it became a necrome, and doesn’t know where it comes from. Since he doesn’t know shit about the necromes, how is he gonna be able to fight a fucking necrome DRAGON?????

Sweeties, do you get it now?

Staying in the Sadida kingdom isn’t for power-hungry clowns. Staying in the Sadida kingdom means that you’ve gambled with your life more than once and you know the taste of adventure and combat. Staying there means knowing that your life can be taken away from you by either the enemies who try to take the literal lungs of the world, or the paralyzed undead dragon who can wake up at any time if he simply wanted to.

You bozos NEED Yugo and Amalia to the point where you can’t even be the ones to stay there, let alone own the place. You can’t stay there because there is so much to keep guard of, to be aware of, and to be ready for. The sadidas have practiced this dance for centuries now and they’ll keep doing it even harder because of an additional menace that is living on their grounds, the dragon being that very threat. Now, not only do the sadidas have to be vigilant of the outside, but they also have to be vigilant of the inside.

So yeah, the royal osamodas are a goofy ass family and I hate the circus.

(i love how the French commentaries on Allskreen and the Krosmoz app are clowning this family lol everyone understood the assignment)

[veelaa]

DO I WANNA KNOW? - ETHAN LANDRY 🎸 (SONGWRITER!Ethan)

SUMMARY: your ex boyfriend is a famous songwriter and singer who writes many songs. ever since you broke his heart, he’s not able to get over you. his only way of escaping reality is writing songs about how he feels.

warnings: angst?, some sort of toxic relationship.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

it had been about 6 months since you broke up with your most recent ex, ethan. you have made it clear that you didn’t want any songs written about you no matter what, but of course he couldn’t obey.

you made sure to keep distance from his songs since they always made your stomach turn. you simply just didn’t wanna be reminded of him in any way.

he was a well known artist as well which made things worse, his whole fanbase of girls sided with him, without knowing the real story behind your breakup. but you didn’t wanna try and solve everything. you decided to show some mercy by not exposing his toxic habits.

but of course that meant you’d have to keep a low profile in order to not get jumped by some stray fans. every brain cell inside your brain yelled at you to reveal the truth, but you were a good person at heart and you decided to live life, which you eventually got over him after that painful process of continuous hate comments and constant nights of crying.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

you were sitting at the bar, no thought of ethan lingering in your mind anymore. you have fully healed from the toxicity of his fans and your relationship.

you heard the small bell at the door ring which caught your attention, making you break out of that small reverie that you were just in.

he was wearing a black leather coat jacket and you immediately were attracted to him. you didn’t know why, but attire was definitely an attractive aspect to you.

your eyes followed his every body movement. he was about the same height as your ex boyfriend which made your stomach turn. it couldn’t possibly be him. you knew that he was on tour or fucking another girl. you were sure that it wasn’t him.

you rolled your eyes and finished your drink, the relaxing sting of the alcohol hitting your throat which calmed down your mind for a few.

you fought everything in yourself to not look. you knew that it wasn’t ethan, you knew that you were over him but all of a sudden he’s popped back into your mind, interrupting your peace that you have been working on for months.

you gave in and turned around. you turned around at the exact time he began to speak. your heart pounded at the sound of his voice.

“can i have a bronx cocktail?” his voice was loud and clear. your heart dropped into your stomach. it was him. it was ethan.

the bartender obviously got straight to work, knowing that ethan was a famous artist and he was a top priority to many.

you spun your chair the other way, your back facing the direction ethan was just standing in. you could hear his boots stomp against the soft wood floor which made you feel sick to your stomach. you were in the same room as him. you were literally breathing the same air as him.

you turned your head to look over your shoulder. you softly gasped to yourself. he was walking towards you. you hoped that he hadn’t noticed you at all and he had another friend at the bar, but to no avail, he stopped right beside you, making you sulk into the stool that you were sitting on.

“long time no see.” his voice made you wanna burst out into tears. you kept denying the fact that you missed him, but now, you couldn’t keep denying it anymore. “yeah.” you answered, nodding before cautiously turning your head, meeting his deep brown eyes that you used to admire.

you chugged your drink down while he repositioned himself, now standing in front of you. he had a sly smirk on his face, the one you always hated whenever you knew that he was up to no good. the one he used whenever you confronted him about him possibly cheating on you.

“have you listened to any of my new releases?” ethan asked, taking a sip of his bronx cocktail. you couldn’t help but stare at his lips which perfectly hugged the rim of the glass that he was sipping out of.

you shook your head at the answer. “no, i really don’t got the time to.” you lied. you were trying to find a way to make him shoo. but you knew that he was like a parasite which is why it took you over a year to get rid of him.

ethan shook his head and laughed. “but you had so much time to listen to my music when we were together.. i see.” he answered. you felt your stomach turn even more. he was clever with his answers and you hated it.

“whatever.” you stood up from the stool and walked away, paying for your drinks that you just enjoyed. you hoped that ethan wouldn’t follow you or anything since you wanted absolutely nothing to do with him.

of course he followed you. you never really knew his intentions from the start which made you absolutely terrified of him.

you walked into a dark alleyway, finding a place to hit a smoke. you reached into your purse to try and find a cigarette and a lighter but there was nothing.

you then turned around on your heels to go walk back home but you were met with ethan once again. he looked better than ever. the streetlight brought out his most attractive features. you couldn’t help but admire him for a few seconds.

“c’mon. can’t we talk?” he begs, his soft lips forming a frown. he was a good manipulator and he was able to manipulate you into doing so many things which you definitely regret.

“not right now.” you said, annoyed, avoiding his gaze completely. he let out a light chuckle, his grin finally showing.

“not right now? c’mon. i really wanna know what could possibly be holding you back from having a small talk with me.” ethan said, his voice turning to a tone of disappointment and hurt which made you feel horrible at this point.

“fine.” you cross your arms and look at him. “spit it out.” you sighed and waited for his bullshit to come spewing out his mouth.

“y/n. i haven’t been able to get over you. i’m just too busy bein’ yours to fall for somebody new.” he began. you immediately roll your eyes at his desperate behavior. “i just wanna know if this feeling flows both ways..” he asked desperately. his body movements becoming more exaggerated.

“you’re horrible at manipulating.” you said angrily, knowing this was one of his tricks. but little did you know that this was one of his songs that he just released.

“i’ve dreamt about you nearly every night this week!” he admitted, his cheeks becoming flushed. “c’mon now.. i’m on the cusp of kissing you right now.” he inches forward which causes you to take a step back.

he was making your heart pound. you had no words left. you just wanted him to do the talking at this point. “we could be together.. if you wanted to.” he said, his face turning into one with puppy eyes. “and- and i was sorta hoping that you’d stay.” he added on.

“i would’ve stayed if you weren’t such a shitty boyfriend.” you began to get more angry. he was wasting your time and you had better things to do.

he gulped and began once again. “c’mon. just crawl back to me. come back to me.” he pleaded, his voice cracking from trying too hard at acting desperate.

“do you want me crawling back to you? because i don’t think i’d do that.” you started to become extremely annoyed now. he was spewing his bullshit once again.

“you never even thought of calling when you had a few. but you know what? i always do. i still care about you.” his words started to make you feel extremely guilty. you thought he’d changed. you hoped that he changed.

“i was wondering if your heart’s still open.. and if so i wanna know what time it shuts.” he inched closer. at this point you just gave up. “simmer down and pucker up, babe.” he said before inching once more to you, smashing his lips onto yours.

you wanted to fight him off but of course your body craved this. you craved ethan so much that you had to deny him.

you kissed him passionately, your lips, teeth and tongue colliding. you wrapped your hands around his dark curls. oh you missed those curls between your fingers so much.

you both finally pulled away for a breath of air. he let out a small chuckle. “listen to the song, ‘do i wanna know’. i recently released it. do it for me, babe.” he whispers before giving you another passionate kiss, except it was more shorter.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

of course you listened to the song for him. your heart was still open, but only for him.

you liked the instrumental, but the lyrics is what sparked your interest the most. some lines felt more familiar than others.

you then remembered the night when ethan trapped you in an alleyway and you both made out. you realized that his ‘bullshit’ was actually song lyrics, and you knew that it was dedicated to you. he never wrote about any other girl besides you.

you received a text from him. “do you like the song? :)” he texted you which made your heart flutter. it was safe to say that you were both on good terms once again.

“oh ethan..” you whispered to yourself while shaking your head. you were head over heels for this man all over again..

~~~~~~~~~~~~

THIS ISN’T REQUESTED BUT I COULDN’T GET THIS IDEA OUT OF MY HEAD😭

[genericpuff]

What the actual fuck are they thinking-

Okay, the caption might seem overblown but... this is not good.

The main LO subreddit has been closed for weeks now. It closed due to the API protests but considering the options in the community poll were to either "stay open indefinitely" or "stay closed until the decision is reversed", there's a tinfoil hat theory going around that the single mod that overlooks that place saw the API protests as an "easy way out", especially considering how hands-off those mods are. By the time the main sub decided to take part in the protests (after the height of the protests were over) it had already been stated by u/spez that they were not going to reverse the decision. Essentially, the LO subreddit is done.

Do you know what's been happening since it closed? Activity in ULO has been skyrocketing, but we've also been seeing a lot more discourse from people who have been forced to stomach the ULO content after having their main community shuttered.

Listen, I've got a lot of issues with the main sub and the things they've done over the past year. There are definitely some really shitty folks in there who have ruined things for those who are just casual readers by just being way too protective of this comic. But that doesn't mean the main sub shouldn't exist. The main sub, as dead as it was by the time it closed, was still an option for people who didn't want blind praise or relentless criticism/shitposting. Though there were people who tried to gatekeep the shit out of the main sub (attempting to make it a "positive vibes only" space) the main sub was never explicitly designed for only praise, and by the time it closed, it was seeing a lot more balance between praise and criticism (to no one's surprise, because criticism has become a lot more mainstream in the LO fandom, simply due to the comic's undeniably tanking). All that said, it made for a nice middle ground. Even I enjoyed going in there and reading people's takes on new episodes every week, whether or not I agreed with them. ULO was not designed to be the only route for discussion concerning LO, it's very specifically run for one specific purpose and that purpose will not line up with those who are now without a space.

Without the main sub, there are people with nowhere to go. Some people casually grin and bear it through ULO, others have gone to /r/LowSodiumLoreOlympus, but considering how dead that sub is also, it's clear the popular opinion is swaying more towards criticism. I can't imagine what it's like to be a community refugee right now.

So what does that leave for those who don't want to use ULO? The Facebook groups, and the Discord. The Facebook groups are probably the most accessible communities - not everyone uses reddit, not everyone knows how to use Discord, but everyone uses Facebook.

So the fact that the Facebook groups aren't going on a small break, but are going on their own 4 month hiatus?

Not only does this further reduce the options for fandom interaction, but this is terrible for the comic. Hiatuses like this can kill long-term retention, and fandom communities are often the best way to keep that retention on some form of life support.

Think of it this way - if I didn't have the ULO community, I probably would have dropped off LO ages ago, cut my losses, moved on. But it's the fact that I have a community to keep in touch with and have fun with that keeps me on this series. This goes the other way as well, into the casual and praise communities - while I'm sure many will still eagerly return in October, for those who are more casual readers, Lore Olympus will essentially be out of sight, out of mind. And that is NOT something you want to happen to a comic that is already losing traction.

I genuinely do not know what Rachel is thinking closing these groups. And yes, I am pointing to Rachel on this decision because she literally runs the official LO Facebook groups. LO going on a mid-season hiatus over the summer when HALF OF HER DEMOGRAPHIC IS HOME FROM SCHOOL is already such a huge risk that will likely kill her numbers; but to go and cut off her official groups from being able to stay connected and talking about the comic during the hiatus, on a platform OCCUPIED BY THE OTHER HALF OF HER DEMOGRAPHIC, LITERALLY ADULT WOMEN ?? What is that supposed to achieve? If she wants to give her mods a break, sure, okay, do that for a few weeks, but four months? Is she so allergic to fans being able to theorize or "figure her out" (because god knows Rachel doesn't like being predictable) or, god forbid, is she worried about giving them too much "freedom" to reflect and discuss the comic during this time without the weekly dopamine distraction hits that they actually stop and realize how shitty the comic is right now?

All I can say is, as much as we're theorizing that LO is going to be getting a 4th season, I really do hope this midseason hiatus is its last. Whatever life this comic has left is being choked out by Rachel and Webtoons' own hands.

And when it does go out, it better go out with a bang. That's the least it can do for itself and its community at this point.

[ughgoaway]

matty leaving the studio early and bringing teacher girlie a travel mug of peppermint tea to the school during her lunch breaks when shes early on in the pregnancy because he knows how nauseous shes been 🥺

Oh, this is SO SWEET. I just know Matty would be doing absolutely everything he could to make sure you were as happy as you could be, pregnancy is rough as fuck (from what I've heard lmao) so he does whatever little things he can to make it better. 

✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿✿❀✿

You've probably been violently nauseous the first trimester, the only thing you can stomach is peppermint tea and crackers. So imagine your disappointment when you get to work, and there's no peppermint tea left in the cupboard. Despite you labelling it a thousand times, someone had stolen it.

You fight the tears brewing and take a deep breath, you almost text Matty to complain to him but you are starting to feel bad about how much he is dealing with from you.

Every morning you wake up and immediately rush to the bathroom to vomit, to say the morning sickness has been bad would be the understatement of the century. And each time, despite your protests, Matty comes to sit with you. Sometimes he rubs your back or holds your hair but mostly he just sits with you. And once you're done coughing up your guts, he escorts you back to bed and doesn't let you get up until he's made you some herbal tea.

He kisses your forehead with a cheesy smile as you hands you your tea, and feels his heart flutter each time you grin up at him before taking your first sip. Matty always waits for you to take one sip, he loves the little happy wiggle you do each time. It was the little things like that that made him fall so unbelievably in love with you. And you doing those same things whilst pregnant with his child? well, lets just say the fact that he's not just staring at you lovesick all day is impressive.

But you're feeling pretty high maintenance about it all, despite Matty assuring you he would do this and more if it made you even fractionally happier. so you don't message. You take a shaky breath and shut the cupboard, going back to your classroom with no tea and trying to prepare for the energy of god knows how many 5-year-olds.

When lunch swings around and you finally get 5 minutes of silence, you once again feel like crying. God pregnancy hormones were making you a fucking mess. you felt as if your brain was swimming in them, and you weren't even that far along.

The kids had been gone for just 10 minutes when you get a knock at your door, and you assume it's one of them coming back to annoy you. You love them, but you sometimes just need time away. 

However, it was literally your job to look after them, so you plaster on a faux smile and say, “Come in!” in your fakest sweet voice. 

You can't hide the gasp of surprise that escapes you when Matty walks in, he's wearing the leather jacket and douchey rockstar sunglasses combo you loved so much, and holding your favourite travel mug. 

He pulls his glasses off with a smile, pressing a kiss on your head when he finally reaches your desk. “Hi my love, just popping in to drop you some peppermint tea. Assumed you wouldn't get a second over lunch to grab your own, and I know how nauseous you've been so I brought it from the studio for you” he softly says, leaning on your desk and stroking your cheek with his cold hands.

“But the studio is so far from here?” you say, sipping the tea happily. And Matty can't hide the Cheshire cat-like grin that pulls at his cheek when he sees you do that little happy wiggle he loves so much. 

“I know, but I had to come and see my girls! And this little one of course. Saw Annie running around like a maniac outside already” Matty rubs your stomach with a grin on his face, flicking his eyes from your face to your bump. He was obsessed with your little bump, even though you're only a few months along matty insists on having his hands on you whenever he can. 

You immediately tear up at his words, and you can't help but let them fall, borderline sobbing in the middle of your classroom over some tea.

Matty immediately snaps into overprotective dad/boyfriend mode, “Woah woah woah. Whats up sweetheart? You okay? Is the baby bothering you or something?” he crouches next to your chair and tries to wipe the tears falling down your cheeks, but they keep streaming as you blubber and sob even harder at his words. 

You try to give him a coherent response, but nothing apart from vaguely word-sounding gibberish leaves your lips, matty gives you a worried look and pulls you into his neck. Rubbing your back gently and shushing you softly, “Oh it's okay darling, whatever it is we can fix it okay? Do you not want the tea? Because I can go throw it away right now” he assures you, pulling your head from his neck and holding your face between his hands.

His worried eyes scan your features, desperately trying to figure out what made you suddenly burst into tears. You sniffle and eventually, your tears stop falling, now you just have wet pink cheeks and a slightly snotty nose.

You suck in a shaky breath before answering Matty, “No no, it's perfect. You're perfect.” you say, smiling at him with love swimming in your eyes. 

Matty smiles bashfully and goes to wave you off, but before he can start speaking again, you cut in, “No, I really mean it. You have just been the most perfect boyfriend I could ask for. I don't know how you knew I needed peppermint tea right now, but you did. And you came out of your way to bring it to me. Just love you a lot, s’all” You feel your cheeks heating up at the slightly embarrassing confession of your unbelievable love for him. But any embarrassment fades when you see the same pink flush rising on Matty's cheeks. 

Very few things felt as good as making Matty Healy blush, an almost impossible task for anyone but you.

“I love you too sweetheart,” Matty whispers back at you, leaning in to press a kiss to your lips. You quickly shoot back and shake your head at him, trying not to laugh at his disgruntled pout. 

“You can't kiss me! Im all gross and snotty” you pout back, wiping at your face and laughing at yourself.

“I don't care. You're the mother of my children, I always wanna kiss you” Matty smiles as he moves in again, and this time you don't pull back.

[vivalas-vega]

new perspectives / jake ‘hangman’ seresin x reader / part three

things are happening !!!! jupiter meets the gang !!! things are starting to line up but I just hope they can make it work...

drops of jupiter is literally her and jake’s song, I don’t make the rules I just enforce ‘em. as always lmk what you think and if you want to be added to the taglist!

new perspectives / jake ‘hangman’ seresin x reader / part three

add yourself to my taglist

prologue - one - two

word count: 4.4k

warnings: language, drinking, a smidge of jealousy, a very cheesy moment at the piano but I could not help myself

The days were passing by in a blur, a monotonous blend of the same thing day after day… You were fighting to stay focused but a few days of mild cases and routine patients had you double and triple checking each chart before entering a room to make sure you were keeping everybody straight. You were officially entering the lull period of your residency where attendings gave you a long leash and let you take the lead, and you were even getting out of work at a decent hour which allowed you to start up a workplace romance with the hospital's forensic pathologist. You’d met him in the bar a few weeks ago and he didn’t take offense to the fact that you didn’t call him by his name, which was Blake, but rather Dr. Death, and he simply thought it was cute when you said he was the reaper and forced him back down to the basement anytime he tried to visit you during the day for fear his energy would affect your patients and send them circling down the drain. At first you’d tried to find something wrong with him, like really truly searched for red flags but there just weren’t any. 

He was supportive and encouraging, definitely wasn’t hard on the eyes, and was endlessly understanding of your work schedule because he endured the same difficulties. You’d sneak out of the hospital late at night and go to that 24 hour diner a few blocks away where you would load up on fries and milkshakes, meet for lunch over soggy cafeteria pizza and surprise each other with a cup of coffee when you could. He waited until the third date to take you home and for some reason you’d hoped he would be terrible in bed because then at least you would have a reason to call the whole thing off but he wasn’t and all of your friends got along with him if they overlooked the fact that you were slumming it with a basement dweller… a fact that never went unchecked by either of you with the reminder that he did in fact go to medical school like the rest of you. 

He was good, and you were seemingly happy yet you couldn’t really figure out why you hadn’t told Jake about him… you’d been seeing each other for two months now (you wouldn’t go far as to say you were in a relationship yet) and it was something you had chosen to leave out of every facetime or phone call. It just never felt like the right moment, talking about your dating lives was really the only thing you two struggled with, it always felt awkward and in a way you felt like you were cheating on Jake. Logically you knew you weren’t, logically you knew (through Coyote) that he was a bit of a ladies man and made his rounds wherever he was stationed that month but it just wasn’t something you ever talked about. Which was why as you sat in the Chief of Surgery’s office early one morning you felt a pit develop in your stomach when he let you know you’d be headed to San Diego for the day.

“UCSD got your fellowship application and they were very impressed… I spoke with their Chief and they’re requesting you for the day, I reckon they’re about to woo you,” he chuckled. “You’ll take the hospital’s charter and return tomorrow evening, you leave in an hour,” he said and you just stared at him in shock.

“Woo me, sir?” you asked and he nodded.

“You’ll spend the day in their facilities, get the lay of the land and meet the Head of Trauma, they’ll likely let you scrub in on something cool… they’re putting you up in a nice hotel in Coronado on the beach and giving you tomorrow to explore the city, likely in hopes of you falling in love with the San Diego lifestyle,” he said and you were still looking at him skeptically. “This is the part where all of your hard work starts paying off, Jupiter. This isn’t going to be the first hospital that tries to get your attention but they’re certainly hoping to be the last,” he said.

“But sir, I have patients… I’m supposed to take Mrs. Murphy in for her-”

“You’ll still have patients when you get back, go… maybe have a little bit of fun,�� he said with a smile and you nodded as you left his office. Having fun wasn’t something you really did often, your life existed within the walls of this hospital. For you, fun was cutting people open and maybe you could constitute what you were doing with Blake as fun but you really thought of it as more of a time filler.

And they’d done exactly what he said they would… you were given a tour of the hospital by an overly eager resident (who had a million questions for you about the clinical trial you’d worked on with your Head of Neuro during your second year) and you learned cutting edge trauma techniques during a GSW surgery that you’d only read about in medical journals all before they sent you packing while the sun was still out to get settled in your hotel and see everything San Diego had to offer you. Jake was still here, he’d returned from his mission a few weeks ago and there was talk about keeping him and all the other pilots that were recalled for the detachment here permanently as a squadron while teaching new recruits at Top Gun. You changed out of the scrubs you’d been wearing since Boston and showered, throwing on a sundress and sandals before walking out of your hotel and strolling along the beach… Following your phone's maps you knew you were only a few minutes away from the bar where Jake told you he spent most of his time nowadays and you dialed his contact, hoping he was around and not up in the air somewhere.

“Hey angel, perfect timing. I just got to the bar, man it was a crazy day at work today,” he said and you could hear the chatter in the background as he greeted Penny and ordered a beer.

“Yeah? Tell me all about it,” you said and you listened as he went on about a new recruit who reminded him a lot of himself but not in a good way, mentioning something about almost losing total control of his jet and taking Phoenix out and you shuddered as you imagined it, stopping right in front of the entrance and taking a deep breath. “Hey, what was the name of that bar you’re always at?” you asked, a soft smirk playing on your lips as you walked in and recognized the group of pilots around the pool table from the photos he sent you.

“The Hard Deck, why?” he asked as you made your way through while praying you weren’t in his line of sight and you saw him leaning against the bar with his back to you and you leaned against a beam a few feet away.

“Huh, that’s weird… I just walked into a bar called the Hard Deck, must be a coincidence,” you said, doing your best to sound nonchalant.

“The Hard Deck? In Boston? That doesn’t make any… are you fucking with me?” he asked and you stifled a laugh.

“I don’t think so? Yeah, there’s this red neon sign out front, a lot of coffee cups hanging from the ceiling which is an interesting design choice,” you said as you watched his head tilt upwards, “a lot of people in khaki. Actually… there’s this guy at the bar wearing the hell out of a khaki uniform that I think might be cute but I can’t really tell, he’s got his back to me… do you think I should make a move?” you asked and he turned around slowly as if he was in a horror movie expecting the killer to be right behind him and you were worried his face was going to split in half from how wide he smiled when he spotted you. He was crossing the distance in an instant, wrapping his arms around you and lifting you off the ground as you giggled.

“What the hell are you doing here?” he asked, squeezing you tight. 

“I was at UCSD for the day getting the star treatment,” you said a touch dramatically as you threw your hair over your shoulder. “Thought I’d surprise you.” 

“Well I am certainly surprised, what do you want to drink?” he asked and you shook your head.

“In a minute, I’m quite liking this surprising people thing…” you said, walking over to the pool table where Coyote was so thoroughly invested in the shot he was lining up he didn’t even notice you.

“What’s a girl gotta do to get a drink around here?” you sighed, leaning against the edge of the table and ignoring the confused looks from the other pilots… 

“Well, give me a moment here darling… I’d be happy to oblige once I win this game,” he replied and you chuckled at the suave voice he’d put on to try and impress you, still not realizing who you were. “Holy shit, Jupiter?” he said after he sank his shot and you laughed as he pulled you in for a hug. “What are you doing here?”

“Thought I’d come see what all this Top Gun nonsense was about,” you replied and he brought his hands up to cup your face and squish your cheeks.

“It’s been far too long, what are you drinking?” he asked, already halfway to the bar and you called out beer after him. 

“The Jupiter?” the dark haired woman you recognized as Phoenix said, sticking out her hand and introducing herself. “Those two talk about you so often I honestly thought you were a myth at this point.” 

“I’ve heard a lot about you too… thank you for keeping this one’s ego in check,” you said with a laugh as you gestured to Jake and he just rolled his eyes at you.

“Someone has to,” she muttered before going around and introducing you to everyone else and you smiled as they all eagerly hugged you, seemingly you were already a part of the family with how often Jake and Coyote mentioned you. “Rooster’s around here somewhere, you’ll meet him eventually.” 

“Okay, tell me all about UCSD,” Jake said, directing you to a chair and you filled him in on all the details… maybe leaving out a few about the surgery at first but Bob had appeared out of nowhere and expressed an interest in the gory details which you were happy to share, and Jake took that opportunity to excuse himself when Coyote brought you your drink and challenged him to a round of pool. His friends were great, they asked a lot of questions and hung onto your every word when you answered and they were thrilled to tell you all about their lives as pilots.

“This could be good for you two,” Phoenix said when the two of you found yourselves alone standing by the window overlooking the beach, “did Hangman tell you we might be getting permanent stations?”

“He mentioned it, but definitely downplayed it,” you answered and she nodded.

“It’s looking more like a serious possibility now,” she said and your eyes brightened, “this is the best squad I’ve ever been a part of… if you overlook half of what Hangman says,” she said and you chuckled. “Turns out the bigwigs feel the same and want us to instruct at Top Gun permanently in between deployments.” You tried to temper your excitement.

“I’m sure you’re all loving that idea… might be nice to officially call someplace home,” you mused.

“We’re all excited… besides, the last mission really bonded us, I don’t know if I could just go back to my old squad after that.”

“He didn’t tell me much, assumed he couldn’t, but from what I hear it looked like a few of you weren’t going to make it back for a minute?” 

She nodded, “Rooster and Maverick, Hangman is actually the one who went after them and saved them,” she said and you turned to look at her with wide eyes. “Disobeyed orders too, surprised the hell out of all of us. He’s a jackass but if you ignore all the bravado he’s kind of a good guy,” she said, “but don’t tell him I said that.”

“Your secrets safe with me,” you chuckled before excusing yourself to grab another drink. You knew from Coyote that Jake had a bit of a rough exterior when it came to work and was often off putting to a lot of other pilots and you were happy to see that he was finding a place here, dropping some of the ego and making real connections. You met Penny who gave you your next round on the house despite how you tried to protest and just as you were about to rejoin the group you came face-to-face with a tall redhead who had an annoyed expression on her face.

“You’re Jupiter?” she asked and when you nodded tentatively you could have sworn she scoffed. “Look, I’m just going to be blunt… Do I need to be worried about you and Hangman?” she asked and you were truthfully stunned and glanced at Penny who gave you a look that seemed to say tread lightly. 

“I’m sorry, you are?” you asked.

“Hannah, he and I are kinda…” she trailed off and you nodded in understanding. You looked her over once more and felt your heart twist as you did, if you looked past her somewhat aggressive disposition she was absolutely stunning. 

“Got it, no you have nothing to worry about… just childhood friends, I’m actually seeing someone back home,” you offered, hoping it would appease her and it seemed to because she disappeared back to her friends and you shook your head in disbelief, tossing back the tequila and smiling at Penny who was already pouring you another. “Thank you,” you said.

“No problem… that happens all the time, there’s always some kind of turf war happening in this bar over the pilots… especially Hangman,” she said and you nodded softly as she went to serve other customers. This shouldn’t hurt, you knew this already but it didn’t do anything to ease the sting or stop the nauseous feeling that took hold in your stomach.

“You’re seeing someone?” You heard Jake ask from behind you and you turned to meet his eyes, letting out a sigh as you did so.

“Kind of? It’s not serious,” you shrugged and really it wasn’t a lie… you weren’t exclusive with Blake, you knew he might want to get there eventually but you weren’t yet. “Didn’t know you were seeing someone,” you added.

“Kind of… it’s not serious,” he repeated your words and you nodded, taking your next shot and looking over to Coyote.

“Your pool partner is beckoning you,” you said and he looked you over, trying to decipher if you were mad or not but he couldn’t tell and honestly neither could you. You had no room to be jealous, you were doing the exact same thing he was. Maybe you were jealous that he wasn’t confronted with it, Blake was just an idea all the way across the country while Hannah was just a few yards away shooting daggers in your direction… you nodded encouragingly, silently telling him to go back to his pool game and you watched as he did so as you leaned against the bar. 

The rest of the group was smiling and laughing, playing darts or engaged in conversation and you thought about how easy it would be if you could just slip in here… you knew you still had to entertain the offers from other hospitals but choosing San Diego just seemed natural and obvious. Your ears perked up as you heard the jukebox suddenly cut out and the sounds of someone tinkering with the keys of the piano and you followed the noise to the end of the bar where you saw a man with a questionable mustache and a rather loud Hawaiian shirt sitting. “You must be Rooster,” you observed and he looked up at you slightly.

“You must be Jupiter,” he shot back, “the girl who has captured everyone’s attention tonight,” he said as you smiled and leaned against the piano.

“I have a tendency to do that,” you chuckled, listening as he switched gears and you recognized the opening notes of Drops of Jupiter, and you let out a loud laugh. “Oh, don’t do it...” you said, trailing off and he just smirked at you, one that you were sure had reeled in a lot of girls before, and it even would have worked on you if you didn’t have Jake to worry about on the other side of the bar.

“Now that she’s back in the atmosphere with drops of Jupiter in her hair,” he started singing and you couldn’t keep the smile off your face as he looked up at you with mischief in his eyes, nudging your leg with his and encouraging you to join in but you just shook your head. “Come on, don’t leave me hanging,” he said before starting the chorus and you begrudgingly sang along with him, maybe a little out of key but it didn’t seem to matter. The rest of the bar had started to move towards the piano and you had an inkling that this was a regular occurrence in this bar. Rooster seemed to have this natural pull to him, almost like gravity as your new friends circled around you and joined in.

But tell me, did you sail across the sun? Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded, and that heaven is overrated? And tell me, did you fall for a shooting star? One without a permanent scar and did you miss me while you were looking for yourself out there?

Across the bar Jake was watching you with an unreadable expression on his face as you danced and sang with his friends, and while you were lost in the moment as you lead the bar in song with Rooster he was abandoning his conversation with Hannah mid-sentence and walking towards you on no accord of his own… you had your own gravitational pull, and when you met his eyes he felt like nothing else in the world truly mattered. Not when you looked that beautiful, not when you and Rooster had the whole bar eating out of the palms of your hands. He couldn’t take his eyes off you, and you couldn’t take your eyes off him as he leaned against a beam and smiled that classically Jake smile at you. When you looked away it was to laugh with Phoenix as Rooster really played up the moment and put his whole heart and soul into it and you thought to yourself that this was what you wanted.

Can you imagine no love, pride, deep-fried chicken? Your best friend always sticking up for you, even when I know you’re wrong? Can you imagine no first dance, freeze dried romance, five hour phone conversation, the best soy latte that you ever had and me?

These were the moments that you were missing… and it wasn’t because you didn’t have the time back home, you could make it if you wanted to. It was because you never felt like you could truly let go of yourself until Jake was around, you didn’t know how to relinquish control and go with the flow unless you were in his orbit, knowing that he was watching over you and these were the moments you craved. You wanted more nights in this bar, with these friends and with those green eyes watching you.

But tell me, did the wind sweep you off your feet? Did you finally get the chance to dance along the light of day, and head back toward the Milky Way? And tell me, did you sail across the sun? Did you make it to the Milky Way to see the lights all faded, and that heaven is overrated? And tell me, did you fall for a shooting star? One without a permanent scar and then you miss me while you were looking for yourself?

The bar was trying to stay in time with Rooster as he ad-libbed the ending but truthfully it was just chaos as you danced with Phoenix and laughed with Coyote as somewhere Bob was recording the whole thing. You wrapped your arms around Rooster’s shoulders as he finished and placed a kiss to his cheek, “thank you,” you whispered into his ear and he nodded after giving your arm a squeeze. You lifted your head to see Jake still looking at you and you made your way through the throng of people, giving him a look that said are you coming? as you slipped out the doors. You kicked your shoes off and set them beside one of the picnic benches before walking out into the sand and you heard the bar doors open and shut behind you… you didn’t need to turn around to know who it was.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he asked and you chuckled.

“I didn’t fly all the way across the country to not get my feet wet,” you answered, turning around to face him as you continued walking backwards. “Gonna join me?” you asked before running towards the water and he just watched for a moment.

“Ah, hell,” he muttered, pulling his boots off and abandoning them in the sand as he rolled his khakis up as high as they would go and chased after you. The water was biting on your ankles and you laughed as Jake caught up and wrapped your arms around your waist, lifting you off the ground.

Inside the bar the jukebox had been turned back on and the group had gone back to their usual spots before catching a glimpse of the two of you out there splashing around in the water and laughing under the moonlight and soon they were crowded around the window to watch.

“You mean to tell me that’s Hangman out there?” Payback asked in disbelief.

“Can you blame him?” Rooster asked, “if she wasn’t the Jupiter I’d be doing anything I could to get her to look at me like that,” he said, overlooking you beam up at Jake.

“The real question here is how are they not together?” Phoenix asked and Coyote shrugged.

“They were a long time ago… They broke up before college because they knew it was going to be impossible to stay together.”

“What a load of shit, they are so in love,” she replied with a faux-gag and Hannah scoffed behind them, coming to see what they were all looking at.

“I knew it,” she muttered and Phoenix shot her a glare.

“Just go home already,” she said exasperatedly and the boys all stifled their laughter.

“Oh come on, you guys are shameless,” Bob said as he returned from the bathroom. “Let them have their moment.” 

“I’m sorry about Hannah,” Jake said as you settled in the sand and you just shrugged.

“It’s okay… I’m sorry about Blake,” you replied and he shook his head.

“I want you to be happy.”

“I want you to be happy, too,” you said, turning your head to face him.

“Are you?” he asked and you pondered this for a moment. 

“I don’t know… I’m happy right now,” you offered and he nodded. “I really like it here… and you might be stationed here permanently?” 

He sighed, “maybe… I don’t want you making any career decisions on my behalf,” he said and you looked back to the water.

“I know.” It fell silent between you two as you both watched the waves. You really were happy right now, you’d known the other pilots officially for a handful of hours but you felt like you were better friends with them than Holly or anyone else back in Boston… you’d come out of your shell and you felt like you were at home. You knew he was going to encourage you to at least hear out any other offers from other hospitals, and you knew that you should but you just didn’t want to. Even if Hannah was someone permanent and even if you didn’t really know where the two of you stood you wanted to be here. “Would it be such a bad thing if I did choose San Diego because of you?” you finally asked.

“I don’t know… I just don’t want you missing out on other opportunities,” he answered.

“They made me a really good offer,” you said, turning to look at him and he raised his eyebrows questioningly. “The salary is way above a standard fellows, they basically greenlit my rural health initiative, and offered to cover my relocation costs, a mortgage allowance and to absorb all of my loans,” you said and his eyes widened. “Even if I consider other hospitals all they’ll be able to do is try and match that, and it’s a really good hospital… you being here is just kind of the final thing that makes it perfect.”

“If you took me out of the equation and another hospital offered you the same, would you take it?”

You shrugged, “I don’t know. San Diego was my number one before I even knew you might be here permanently.” 

He nodded, “don’t get me wrong, I want nothing more than for you to be here but I just want you to consider all of your options.”

“I know,” you said, refocusing on the water. “But I just don’t think making a decision because of you would be a bad thing.”

“I didn’t say-”

“You kind of did.” you cut him off, “and I get it… I wouldn’t want you doing the same for me but… Hannah? That sucked, and I know it didn’t feel good hearing me say I was seeing someone,” you said. “I just… I’m tired, Jake. I had more fun tonight than I’ve probably ever had, I can see myself living here and I just don’t want to have to justify that to you because you think I should keep my options open.” 

“I’m sorry,” he said, wrapping an arm around your shoulders and you leaned into him. 

“Everything has been hard… the last ten years of my life have just been hard and I’m finally in a position where I can do something that would make everything so much easier so if that’s what I decide to do just… let me, okay?” 

“Okay,” he said, holding you tight as you let your eyes drift closed. “I’m really proud of you, Jupiter.”

“I know…” you said, twisting your neck to look up at him. “I’m really proud of you too...”

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