#the entire point of the fiction here is that they ARE good people. unlike cops! they cannot be cops!!

[mamawasatesttube]

i think, for me, a large part of why i refuse to accept edgy writers at dc trying to make batman an abusive parent (while ofc refusing to acknowledge that what they're writing is abuse) is that... the entire premise of the justice league, as a narrative tool, is that they are Good People. the second any of them turn a blind eye to one of their founding members abusing his kids, the superhero narrative falls apart. they can't be good people if they enable child abuse! this just turns them into, like, fucking cops. it doesn't WORK.

also like clark kent my good friend clark kent is the best man on the entire planet and he would not fucking say that. he would not be besties with a man who abuses his kids. and given that he is literally superman, it would be very hard to hide that from him. he would not fucking let that slide

but like. the entire concept of the dc universe where superheroes exist and we as an audience are supposed to root for them and believe in them. this falls apart when people go "actually, bruce hits dick and is extremely emotionally manipulative and etc etc etc". by all means let him fuck up, let him have flaws, and let him get things wrong, but to be a hero he fundamentally needs to be a good person. that's the entire point.

[ghostflowerhotpotch]

How good of a parent is George Stacy?

Okay, this was going to be part of another post, but it got so long that I decided that you know what? Let's give its own.

I want to make one about Miles's parents and a bit of a preview: 1) Rio and Jeff, while not perfect, LEAGUES better than George, and all things considered they almost deserve a medal for how patient they are about the situation and 2) Part of the reason that post hasn't come out yet, is because I had been trying to get dig some sources about some cultural differences between America vs Latin America, as well as Puerto Rico and the importance of family (because I am not from PR, just to make sure instead of assuming is similar because our countries aren't that far,) and how diaspora also impacts this.

As you can imagine, that's a lot of things to consider, unlike this, that is the equivalent of not-so-well adjust adult in their mids twenties screaming about adult parents because hey, I am bitter and I think Gwen deserves better.

This also will talk a bit about cops, implied childhood neglect, nothing would get too graphic but take this into account.

Let's go!

There are many reasons why I think this, but let's start with the biggest one: Peter's death.

Now, I can't say this is entirely George's fault; if you see things from his perspective, it all makes sense in his eyes.

In his eyes, you need to have a public face when you do this type of job, you shouldn't hide. That sounds dumb, especially when taking into account the type of villains spider people fight, which usually is the type that will try to go to your loved ones to hurt you.

However, he kind of has a point. If there is damage, if someone else gets hurt, even by accident, the person who did should be able to face consequences.

Do police do this? Not really, at least not in most places I had lived, maybe is different somewhere else, but let's not dig too much into politics here. Perhaps in Gwen's universe the police system works; this is a work of fiction with super senses that can travel past dimensions and time, this isn't the craziest thing.

Going back to the point.

In George's eyes, SpiderWoman, at least at the beginning, should give a name, since you shouldn't hide with that amount of power. The guy doesn't realize the fine print because either he isn't aware of it, or thinks the bad guys can be stopped easily enough that the vigilante in question shouldn't worry.

Then, the next time you see her, she is with the corpse of your daughter's best friend; and for how she behaves later; the last friend she has to his knowledge.

Sure, he doesn't have any idea of what happened, but as far as he knows, she killed him. This also checks out with the fact that he believes you shouldn't hide, and go by the book; he probably believes that if she truly didn't do anything, Spiderwoman would have cooperated with the police because is innocent; so if she is running, is because she is guilty.

Could all this be fixed if she had talked to him at some point about this? While she was hugging Peter's corpse, while grieving him, before this all happened? Maybe, maybe if he could have known what was at risk, why she was doing it; and emotions weren't running high, this could have been better.

There is some blame on both sides in this situation, however-

This, is a good indicator of something.

Look, we don't have an exact time of how long has been since Peter died, or when exactly this conversation happened, we aren't even sure how much time has been since ITSV in this instant either. We only know this conversation happened a few months before ATSV, and that's not much.

However, I can't believe this is too recent, anyone feels free to bring me the evidence; but until we have something set in stone, I believe Peter died not so long after Gwen became Spider Woman, if only because the bite and the death of someone close to them are fairly close. And by ITSV, Gwen already has been SpiderWoman for 2 years.

(I don't think it was a matter of days, personal headcanon is a few weeks, since Peter had pictures of SpiderWoman and everyone close to her knew about it, which meant she already gathered a bit of a name in the area. As well as enough for Peter to want to be more like her.)

All of this is to say: It has to be a while, and Gwen is clearly not interested in this topic.

Considering the possible timeline, it has been a while since Peter died; I don't think this is the first time they have had a similar conversation, maybe not with Gwen shouting, but with her preferring to not talk about it, or move on.

Is not that odd; sure, partially because Gwen doesn't want her dad to hate her alter ego, but the fact of the matter is this: Gwen is telling her dad that she doesn't want revenge, she doesn't want to continue chasing anyone. Even if Gwen and Spiderwoman were different people; Peter was her best friend, she was the one who suffered the biggest loss, and she has the right to mourn her friend as she wants.

I understand that George needs to do his "job," and that a lot of people feel relieved when the murder of a loved one is captured; but Gwen is telling him that is not going to her grief, and he clearly hasn't been able to help her with that.

I didn't want to put that image because this post is going to be long; however, when Gwen says she quit the band, he looks a bit unsure at first, and then breaks the news that he feels they are closer to capturing Spiderwoman.

George is trying to bring good news, but the fact that she commented on quitting the band, and this was his first idea to how "cheer her up," shows how much he doesn't know how to help her out.

Can't he help her because she isn't telling him the full story? Yes, but that fear comes out of nowhere? Nope!

I try to do one pic with multiple scenes for this one, it's a trial; hopefully, Tumblr doesn't mess up the quality too badly.

George says "I have a job to do," when Gwen says Spiderwoman may be innocent. Not only this is the truth, George doesn't have all the facts; Spiderwoman was cradling Peter's body when he came by, and she ran away after he pointed a gun at her and has been hostile. The fact that anyone would be nervous at that doesn't come across his mind, let alone; the position she was in with Peter wasn't anything close to lethal. Not to mention that the other students should at least have mentioned, that the lizard try to attack them, and probably that regardless of what happened to Peter was voluntarily or not, as far as everyone is aware, no one knew Peter was the lizard. I doubt they didn't examine his body to figure that one out, considering this is supposed to be attempted murder so they probably checked stuff.

I bet this happens often. Look, I get it, both of my parents are alive but I grew up mostly with one parent for most of my life, and this parent had a very time-consuming job, as well as energy-consuming. I understand that even if we don't know how long Gwen's mom has been gone (though you can guess a while considering she isn't mentioned at all in either movie.) George has a job to do. That being said...Gwen has probably suffered from this; you can see it later in her face, in the fact that her color changes (she was blue as sadness, got warm when they hug, and then went back to blue when he left her.) She probably has to spend a lot of time alone for this, perhaps for a while she was terrified that she would lose her dad forever in a job, considering how dangerous is his line of work. And while it may be the right thing to do for your work/duty, it definitely means he is prioritizing his job over her; Gwen said it more than once, her dad is all she has, and she probably doesn't have an uncle Aaron, even with other living relatives, they are clearly not close enough. If he dies, Gwen effectively becomes an orphan, and goes to the house of someone she isn't close to, blood or not. (Sidenote, hey how are the chances Miles also had the same fear, and both becoming heroes partially, to ensure they can be there for their respective fathers?) Let me tell you a painful truth; even if George has good intentions in doing what he does, none of that eliminates Gwen's pain. If a kid loses a parent in a fire-related accident because the parent was a firefighter and they risked their life, it doesn't mean the kid doesn't grieve a parent just because said parent didn't abandon them like a deadbeat; in fact, if it is for a noble reason, it may make those feelings more complicated and difficult to deal, especially without professional help (that I doubt Gwen has gotten much of.) And I am sorry, but there is a difference even in my hypothetical scenario, because is one thing having a risky job when you have another partner, and in case you have family or friends that can be there for them in case something happens to you. As far as we can see, the closest they had was Ben and May Parker, which is nowhere to be found in the present time. I am sorry, but in my eyes, that's failing Gwen, especially because she is suffering from needing to deal with sudden absences, possible wounds, and scares.

She is giving her big speech as to why she needs to do this after he attempts to walk on her for being salty (which I still feel annoyed at, I think he should have groveled, but WHATEVER, not the point.) And he is trying to justify this as "you need to obey the law no matter what." Look, I understand there are laws for a reason, but laws can be fallible, and in this case, hurt the wrong people. Both in real life and in this moment, if they try to go by the law, things would get worse; Gwen would have her identity leaked, and even if proven innocent, more people would be at risk for it.

The last two pics show the same point but also illustrate the gravity of the situation in different ways. First, George refused to listen to Gwen, despite her trying to explain the situation to him. And btw, the second? that's not when she is masked, that's when she has already revealed her identity, just before Miguel shoots a trap at him. Sure, he may not have pulled the trigger, but that's EXTREMELY close to pointing at her, and let's remind you, he didn't stop because he remembered she was his daughter, he didn't have to point directly at her because Miguel threw a trap to him before it happened; maybe he wouldn't have pointed at her, or truly pull the trigger; however, do I need to say how absolutely HORRIFYING is for him to do this to her?

I know, all of this is happening in a specific timeline of their lives, and doesn't necessarily need to reflect their reality the rest of the time, much less that maybe things were better before Peter's death, or before she became SpiderWoman.

To that, I said: that may be an argument for real life, but this is a movie, normally, you try to show often, things that show you how a dynamic works so you have an idea of what's going on in the character's lives.

(For example, in ITSV, we see in the beginning Miles being late for school, barely getting ready, and talking to a bunch of people before his dad picks him up. While this is a new day for him, it also gives us an idea of what's normal for this family and their dynamics on a semi-regular basis.)

George, repeatedly puts his job over Gwen; there are even other hints in moments I didn't bother to show. And this is not new; as I pointed out, which really is a bad look.

Now, do I think is the worst? No, of course not; I had seen way worse before.

To be fair, this is the defense.

He is interested in what she is doing, and being his idea ask her how the practice went and check on her. Yeah, he didn't know what to say about her quitting, but aside from the guy not being the best emotionally wise (which he looks like Gwen inherited from him, not shocking considering the very likely scenario that the mom kicked the bucket early and may have also had the same issue for all we know,) but he is trying to ask about it and isn't mad for her leaving like that.

I know what you are going to say "WAIT, didn't you put this as a negative earlier?" Yes, and I still think is a negative, however; there are nuances in everything, and if I brought up the bad in that scene, I need to recognize the best. Do I think he should take the hint and drop the topic, at least? Yes, but I say this earlier: He thinks this would help, and in most cases, it does help; a big part of the reason is not going to do it in this scenario is because it makes more messes than anything else, yet if the scenario was exactly what he thought it was, perhaps it would have helped. As far as he is aware, Gwen just wants to drop the subject because she may be disappointed this hasn't been solved already, and the fact that even if it isn't, it looks like the real reason she has become so much angry and solitary.

This one kind of addressed both images, and none of them are big talking points, however, I need to say it: 1) It was HIS idea to ask for a hug, and mind you, asking; maybe is because I am someone who can't hug people they aren't comfortable with, but I prefer people ask me, especially when I am feeling emotional. 2) See how he looks at her, he clearly loves his daughter.

Gwen went to hug him, if he was that much of a horrible father, she wouldn't have done this, let alone as quickly.

I know this one carries controversy, but yes, I believe Gwen is a trans girl, and probably has been out for a while (nope, I don't have sources or similar, just hc based on other clues.) I don't think I can say anything that someone else didn't say already, so I will not analyze why I think this is the case. I will say this; yes, I am aware there is no hard proof in the movie. Yes, I think is okay if other people think her dad is trans, or Peter was, or maybe everyone is just an ally. My only issue is people saying is IMPOSSIBLE to happen, or that is not the case because (insert theory with no hard proof, meaning is okay to believe it, but not to push it down anyone's throats.) With that out of the way; as someone who is trans, I can't say enough about how having a parent supporting a transition is MASSIVE. Especially early on.

He QUITS. Did he wait at the end after doing something absolutely horrifying to her, leaving her in a very vulnerable position that technically, lead her to be in a dangerous position? Yes, it took a while all things considered? Also yes. I consider those factors important, HOWEVER, he decided to quit. While the emotional wounds are probably still there, he is finally listening, and deciding to change for Gwen. Mistakes or not, he is doing the right thing, and is up to Gwen if she can forgive him or not. And she does, which should show something.

Again, it needed a very serious experience, but this was the wake-up call he needed. I didn't show it all, but he says how his job as a Captain doesn't matter anymore, because ultimately he loves her more than his position, and she is at the end of the day, the best thing he has ever done. Not becoming captain, not detaining a dangerous criminal or anything, her. I believe it would have been valid for Gwen if she decided to not forgive her dad, or that they still have a long road to recover; nonetheless, I think when you aren't the one who was directly affected, you need to take into account when someone decides to do the right thing, and turn a new leaf. Is one thing to not be able to move past a betrayal for someone really close to you; and another is hearing someone you know to some degree made mistakes and then fix them. It took me a while (in fact, almost 3 hours; there is another post that is half-done since this was part of something else, but yeah.) While I believe George Stacy did mistakes, he is turning a new leaf, and working to be better. And that's amazing in itself. If anyone thinks that the bare minimum or some of my points were the bare minimum, I think that's fine. My baseline for parenting and judging parents is kind of off, and that's as much detail as I want to give about it. One way or another, I think George for a while, wasn't able to support Gwen in all the ways she needed; he was trying his best, and a few things aren't his fault considering the circumstances. However, Gwen definitely needs more than him. Next, Gwen's possibly wanting a mom, and the role Jess plays in all of this.

[vetlan]

Summary: Nothing says "Impromptu Darkwing Duck Reunion" like being arrested for something a group of lookalikes did, and then being bailed out by a… Darkwing Duck cosplayer? Fanboy? Well, there were odder things that happened in relation to that cursed show.

Characters Present: Megavolt ( Actor ), Quackerjack ( Actor ), Liquidator ( Actor ), Bushroot ( Actor ), Darkwing Duck ( Drake Mallard )

Notes: The Actors are named after the original Voice Actors! Also this isn’t meant to make much sense, I just sat down today and chose violence, and by violence I meant a “short” humor fic based on the idea of the old actors seeing their villain alter-egos on the news. Serisouly how did this turn into writing almost 5k words in one day...

---

Dan Rattus-Sphynx was having a bad day, but not a terrible one. He was stuck in traffic on his way home after a long day at work, thinking on the cold tv-dinner he'd be indulging in while wondering what was causing the hold up -- unfortunately, if he'd been listening to the news on the radio, he would've been tipped off to the one fact that was about to turn his bad day into a terrible one: the old cast of Darkwing Duck was to be brought in for questioning. After Jim Starling's little explosive breakdown, when mirror-perfect images of the old actors started looting and terrorizing the city, the mayor wanted to take no chances.

And maybe then he wouldn't have laughed and asked the cops if they were a fan of his work as Megavolt -- he was pretty sure now, sitting in his cell, that they took that the wrong way.

He was the first to be apprehended.

Next came Michael Peckbell, once known as the actor behind Quackerjack, who was embarrassingly enough, arrested in a clown costume. Dan genuinely tried to hide his snickering as the old clown jingled miserably into the cell, done arguing for his innocence. It is only after he threw a dirty look at Dan that he recognized who he was sharing a cell with, and his annoyance turned to recognition and then confusion, head tilting to the side and making his hat jingle.

"Wait, why are you here?"

"Same reason you are, I guess… There's a warrant for our arrest because some lookalikes decided to rob banks while cosplaying as our old Darkwing Duck roles."

"No, seriously, Dan, why are we here? I was at a brat's blasted birthday party when these BRUTES went and tackled me!" Hands on his hips, Michael didn't look particularly amused as he tapped his foot, and Dan tried his best not to get short with the ex-actor turned party clown.

"Hey, I am serious! It's all they're showing on the news, I got taken while driving home! Wait, shh, do you hear that--" "Oh no, you're not shutting me up--" "I'm serious serious Mike, listen!"

Holding the duck's beak shut, which earned him another dirty look, Dan shuffled them closer to the holding bars so that they could listen to the news from the dingy little tv at the start of the holding cells corridor. Seriously, couldn't they turn the volume up a little? Luckily, as if hearing his silent wish, they do turn the sound up.

"... we interrupt this segment to bring an update on the current string of robberies and break-ins that have been plaguing St. Canard to inform that massive plant growths are starting to block off city exits, we strongly recommend that you resist fleeing the city and instead head home where it is safest -- ah, I am now getting reports of streets being flooded! Again, stay indoors and do not head out until further instructions! Your city's law enforcement is currently working with Darkwing Duck to apprehend the criminals behind this!"

"Oh quack, actual super villains, we're doomed!" A wailing voice can be heard from the front of the police station, paired with a stern: "GET IT TOGETHER, they have Darkwing Duck on the case!" The commotion paired well with the confused and genuinely taken aback look Dan and Mike shared.

"Drkwng dck?!" Mike tries to get through his beak, then realizing Dan was still holding it shut and slapping the hand away. Probably for the best right there, as that exclamation would've been much louder otherwise. "Has the world gone cuckoo? He's fiction! We're fiction! Well, not us, we're not fiction, but the characters we played! They can't be serious, this why we're here? Hah! Give me a break!" The party clown jumps on the cell bars, shaking the door and making a ruckus, refusing to believe a single thing he's heard: "Ha! Ha! Ha! Very funny, now let us out!" Each 'laugh' is punctuated by a vigorous shake and increased irritation, visibly huffing from anger from his beak… and absolutely not helping their case. One policeman dared peek over their way, and he squealed!

(Jeez, what is it with clowns and short tempters?)

"Would you cut that out? You look deranged! Is this what you do at birthday parties?" With a sharp tug at the back of the collar, Dan manages to pry his ex-co-star from the bars, who seemingly immediately deflates and jingles to one of the benches, sitting with his elbows on his knees and his cheeks in his hands, absolutely pouting. "I'm not any happier about this than you are, you know! But it makes sense! Almost! It explains why we couldn't get any work done at the office today, our system kept going down like someone was messing with it!" That earns him a scoff from his current cell companion, and Dan can't help but throw a look in the clown's direction. "What?"

"You, work in an office?" The question can come across as derogative, but there's genuine curiosity there. "I thought you were big into the acting thing, had your big break and everything as a villain or something." A pause. "Well, bigger villain than before."

There Dan pauses, brings up an index finger as if he's going to make a point, then just sighs and practically collapses into a slouch. It has been a while since the last Darkwing Duck meet-up, huh? No wonder Mike was so out of the loop.

"Yes, well, I gave it up. Want to hear a secret?" An earnest jingly nod is his reply. "I was asked to return for the Darkwing Duck remake… reboot… whatever movie they were making, but I just said no. I feel like I got typecast into the 'weasely evil rat' archetype, you know? After a while, I just started to wonder if people were laughing with me or at me. At least you made it work out somehow."

"That's exactly my deal! People kept making me into the laughing stock so I figured I might as well be an actual clown and beat them to the punch. The brats are annoying, but it beats the circus I was at before the show. Keeps me from getting rusty, even if I'm just going through a checklist of party-tricks at this point." From his pout, Mike perks up, banging his fist on the bench to his side before standing up again, seemingly bracing himself for -- ah, he twirls into a handstand, and Dan claps in genuine amazement.

"Wow, you still got it!"

"Eh, it's nothing. Unlike you guys, I had to work with Jim directly, by his rules. No doubles allowed, or I was a puffy-tailed coward. Quackerjack had no real special effects, remember? Just toys and acrobatics to use against Darkwing Duck." He could do it, but admittedly his endurance wasn't what it used to be. Still, to be a bit of a show-off, Mike stays like that for another minute before twirling right side up, trying to shake off the dizziness that came up with it -- only to stumble and be steadied by Dan when the lights in the entire station flicker and a distant rumble shakes the entire street, and suddenly they remember their current predicament. Yeap. Whatever was going on was very real. 

"Hey, cut that out!" Someone calls from the front of the police station, and Dan tries his best not to sound absolutely peeved off when he answers back. "It's not me, you bumbling meatheads!" He genuinely tried.

The silence after that is frustrating and uncomfortable. Meeting up was nice and all, but no one was talking to them, they didn't know if their friends and family were safe, and apparently, the city really was being overtaken by super-powered criminals based on characters they played in a kid's tv-show. So Dan sat on the bench, momentarily stunned by that fact even though he was the one trying to convince Mike it made sense, all the while the clown decided to tire himself out further by continuously jumping up to try and look out the tiny cell window they had.

"Would you STOP your jingling about!?"

The only answer Dan got was a raspberry blown in his direction. Real mature.

---

Tino had made his mind up the moment he caught sight of himself on live tv robbing a bank: he was turning himself in. For one thing, it would immediately prove his innocence because he couldn't be robbing banks if he was in captivity, and then he'd hopefully be safe from these super-powered evildoers! Alright, so, well, his initial plan was to flee the city, but then his green lookalike decided to go and BLOCK every exit to St. Canard just as he was trying to drive away. It was almost impressive, really, to see what a bigger budget could have gotten them back in the good old days, but it was mostly terrifying that the guy behind these massive green growths was out there. W-w-what if these copycats had some sort of personal vendetta against the originals?! He wasn't sure why they would, but he wasn't taking any chances! He was driving to the nearest police station and that was it!

Only one road is cut off, the other is flooding towards him and it takes all his composure to slam on the reverse and scream at the same time, and instead, Tino decides to just head for the high ground at a park and go from there. Tino might have been speeding for the first time in his life just then, but he figured that it was fair -- and hey, maybe a cop would come and arrest him! No such luck, however.

The mallard duck looked positively green in the face ( no pun intended ) as he thought over his options, though it felt more like he was frozen in shock, just sitting there with his hands on the wheel and looking straight ahead. Was that… the ground shaking? If he looked at his bobblehead of Bushroot (which he'd be tossing out after this endeavor, thank you very much), he could take note of how it kept shaking as if with the steps of a giant duck --

The passenger door to his car opens, a figure jumps inside and Tino screams like a banshee and just tosses his wallet and car keys at them, fruitlessly trying to open the door and escape after he reactively locked them with the press of a button.

"TAKE IT, I DON'T NEED IT, I'M A POOR COLLEGE PROFESSOR SPARE ME --"

"JUST CALM DOWN, I DON'T WANT YOUR DANG -- wait Real? Tino Real?! It's me! Jack Pumi! Old co-star?!" And as if a switch had been flipped inside Tino's head, first his voice gives out and then his beak shuts, and his feathers unruffle themselves. Yes, he knew a Jack Pumi, that's right.

"Oh, sorry friend! You really shouldn't sneak up on a duck-like that, I feel like I almost laid my heart there!" Tino practically melts into his seat as his stress is wrung out of him at the sight of a familiar face during these scary times. "What brings you to… my car?" Hey, why did Jack get into his car?

"Ah, don't sweat it old chum! We're all a little jumpy nowadays, criminals on the run and all that." The Bushroot bobblehead is starting to shake with considerable vigor, but this is missed by the two as Jack pats Tino on the shoulder. "As for why I'm here --" A look in the rearview mirror, the surprisingly unmistakable sound of a car being stepped on not too far behind them by a giant clown robot. "DRIVE!"

You didn't have to ask Tino twice, even if they both fumbled with the keys back and forth before finally taking off as a massive foot concaved the ground where they just were, but it was best if they focused on that later. Right now, they were flooring it to… somewhere.

"Just like the good old days, don't you think? So, what's the plan, captain?" As Jack tried to hold on through Tino's panicked driving, he felt he might as well make some small talk -- not to mention that he talks when he's nervous.

"In the good old days, we were the bad guys squashing innocent civilians, and I have to say, it isn't much fun when you're on the other side of it! And p-plan, well, I don't know, drive until it leaves us alone? Until the deranged clown gets bored?"

"If I recall, boring that quacking menace is the last thing you want to do…"

"Well, what do you suggest?! Ohnononoit'sgettingcloser!" And the laughing is getting considerably irksome, if not straight up giving the both of them goose-skin.

"Where were you going before I showed up, why were you just sitting there at the park?"

"I was thinking of driving to a police station and hiding there, but the streets got flooded so I drove to higher ground and then… I froze in the existential terror of considering that a super-powered copycat of myself was wreaking havoc."

"First: beats driving in circles trying to lose this clown, second: boy I feel ya, but now's maybe not the time to focus on that pal-io! How's about you really step on the gas and see if we can't throw it off? There, right there! Turn!"

A paired screaming match occurs when Jack just grabs the wheel and sends them on a sudden turn right, Tino struggling to regain control of the car before laughing hysterically with nervous energy as Quackerjack's mech kept going straight… before turning to look at them again. They screamed again and floored the gas as far down as this crusty old car could go.

Meanwhile, Quackerjack just let out a singular 'huh' at the realization that there was a car under him the whole time… before devolving into a manic fit of giggles at the realization of the terror he caused to the two little bugs hidden under his massive robot's beak. Oh, he loves being a bad guy. Endless fun!

---

"I'm TELLING you, that's a giant Quackerjack robot! Look! Look!"

"How many times do I have to tell you that I can't jump that high?!"

---

The rest of the drive was… surprisingly peaceful. Sure, there were random root systems on the road that pretty much served as speedbumps every so often, but outside of that there was no sign of any evildoers, only the ominous red glow in the sky coming from some skyscraper or other, neither Tino or Jack cared much for the fancy science labs uptown… but that probably explains the commotion going on! The bet was on if it was science or magic behind this mess, and Tino was feeling pretty sure about his bet on magic.

Alright, so maybe peaceful wasn't the word, more like… eerie. But it beat constant panic 100%, so Tino wasn't complaining! About that, at least. He was most certainly complaining about his current treatment at the police station -- they wouldn't arrest him! Which wasn't a complaint he thought he could make.

"We're not looking for fanboys, we're looking for the actual actors to turn themselves in!"

"F-fanboys!? Why I oughta -- do you expect me to grow a plant on top of my head? I'm Tino Real, I played Bushroot, this is Jack Pumi, he played the Liquidator. What's next, you expect him to turn into liquid?"

Perhaps a bad choice of words, as that's exactly the footage that was shown through live news on the tv right then and there, Bushroot and the Liquidator teaming up and just wiping the floor with what appeared to be… Gizmoduck. Huh. Oh well.

"Honestly, yes. We already caught the other two, and they're not causing any problems anymore."

"Wait, other two? Do you mean Dan and Mike?" Jack interrupts, only to be interrupted himself by the officer that had just been speaking. "Quackerjack and Megavolt," the officer corrects.

Tino can't resist facepalming.

"You can see Quackerjack in the distance from here…" It was true, it looked like he was headed for the building emitting that ominous glow, for whatever reason, but there's no missing that giant clown robot-toy thing. That murmured exasperation does give the officer pause, and he holds up an index finger telling them to wait where they are… which they do, with a tap of a foot and impatient crossed arms, as he walks around his desk, doggy tail impatiently swooshing behind him… before quickly tucking between his legs as he hurried back inside, seconds before the lights inside the station all shut down, emergency generators kicking in seconds after.

"Quackerjack, Megavolt, accounted for. You were right." Snout pale, the dog looked like he was sweating underneath his coat of fur, licking his lips in nervousness. So maybe they shouldn't have been quite as ruff when apprehending the first two… Oh well. "I don't care anymore, you can share a cell with the other washed-up acts." The green duck said something about it being safer in than out, and well, the police dog couldn't exactly argue against it. Besides, the mayor said to apprehend them, right? Hopefully, no word about them trying to turn these two away would surface…

---

"Dan, Mike, buddies, remember me?!"

That got the two sitting in the cell snap their heads up so fast, one could almost hear a whip crack, and Mike punches Dan in the shoulder, a large grin on his face. "See, what did I tell ya, they got caught too, which means they know we're innocent, so they have to let us out. That, and you owe me 20."

"Funny joke, clown, they're joining you, not the other way around."

One click, two click, and Toni and Jack join the other two actors inside the cell, and Toni nearly kisses the floor he's so glad to be inside and safe. Well, safe-ish.

"Haha, don't mind him, we just had a rough trip on the way over, traffic was absolutely killer!" No, Jack couldn't help it, he had to make that joke. "We would've gotten here sooner, but we spent like ten minutes driving away from a killer giant robot that looked like… what's with the clown costume?" It wasn't Quackerjack-y, but that was definitely a clown outfit.

"Oh, was that your car?! Ahahaha -- sorry, sorry, but that's all I could see from that window -- he almost crushed you two a good five times! And I'm a clown. End of story." The tone of voice certainly said so, but then it quickly turned to confusion. "Wait, what do you mean 'gotten here sooner'? You want to be in jail?"

"Well, we, we, we were going to turn ourselves in! And we did! It's safer to be in here than out there, you know! You watched us almost get crushed!"

Mike looks like he's about to say something, and then he realizes Toni definitely had a good point there, so he settles on shrugging his shoulders, looking at Dan and hoping he'd have any sort of opinion on this other than just 'meh'.

"So…" Dan starts, feeling particularly coerced by Mike's incessant staring, but not having anything interesting to talk about.

"So…" Jack copies as he looks around their holding cell before slapping his hands together. "We're staying in here until this all blows over, as I'm pretty sure they know we're not the ones causing the big old ruckus. Kind of slaps me with a terrible sense of deja-vu, to be quite honest. The Fearsome Four, back together!"

That does bring up some amused mumbling from the group, even if the mere mention of the show had since gotten stale thanks to Jim Starling's obsession with it, mentioning it wherever he went.

"The only thing that's missing is Dorkwing Duck, huh?" Mike adds, snickering to himself, before pausing with a pensive look on his beak, and Toni can't help but regret what he's about to ask:

"What's on your mind, Michael?"

"Just thinking, really, but… What if this is Jim's doing? You all heard how he went crazy about the movie, right? Single handedly got it canceled, got into a fight with the new guy playing Darkwing Duck. What if this is him trying to reboot it on his own now?" Ignoring the fact that it sounded like a conspiracy theory, it almost made sense. He hasn't been seen since, so what if he was planning his comeback all this time?

The four occupants of the cell look at each other, and then break down laughing.

"As if! That thick headed, self-centered dimwit couldn't plan something this far ahead!"

"Where would he find these super-powered copycats, anyway?!"

"You'd think he'd come for the source material, if it came to that!"

"Ahaha, I know, right!?"

And just like that, the ice was broken, and the four of them made themselves as comfortable as they could in their current situation, deciding to look at it as a surprise reunion. Funny how most of their problems with the old show stemmed from Jim…

---

A large explosion echoes through St. Canard, and Mike wastes no time in trying to peek out the tiny cell window while a commotion began at the front of the police station. The ominous red glow faded from the sky, the plants withered, lights flickered back on through the city, and floods ran down drain pipes.

Whatever it was, it was done. Hopefully.

---

The next morning wasn't exactly glamorous. They were served their breakfast slop and told to wait until they fixed the bureaucracy involved in this mess, because apparently there was no paperwork for "interdimensional villains from an old live-action hero show", and there was no real proof they weren't connected somehow.

"Outside of the fact that we spent all night in here?! Let! Us! Out!"

"Seriously, what is it with clowns and short tempters…" Dan mutters, but all that Toni and Jack offer him is a vague shrug. Mike was just like that, why else would they pick him to play Quackerjack?

"Experts agree, stressing yourself out won't get you anywhere, friend!" Jack starts, even if he's not exactly sure who the experts would be in this case. It does make the duck stop trying to strangle or otherwise pry the cell bars appart with sheer physical strength -- that, or someone was finally coming to see them. Turns out it was the later, but Jack would like to believe he helped anyway!

No words of acknowledgement, just the same cop that greeted Toni and Jack yesterday, but now, instead of a scared look on his face, he looked positively starstruck. Which would be nice, if he hadn't made it clear that he didn't care about their acting careers, so what gives? The four of them look at each other, and after a vague shrug from Dan, they file out of the holding cells and make their way out. Or plan to, at least, until Mike comes to a full stop and forces everyone behind him to stumble over each other.

"Hey, what gives --!"

"JIM!? I WAS KIDDING WHEN I SAID THOSE THINGS YESTERDAY, I DIDN'T THINK IT WAS ACTUALLY YOU BEHIND THIS --"

The clown-attired duck rattles off, and that startles both the party behind him and the supposed Jim, who jumps a whole foot into the air and stretches his hands in front of him, trying to calm the shocked duck down.

"N-no, no, you got it all wrong, I'm Darkwing Duck! The one and only! Technically based on the remake but we don't talk about it! AlsoI'mabigfanandIwaswonderingifyouwouldn'tmindsigningthisposter--"

The first part wouldn't be unbelievable if it had been Jim, but the mention of a remake knocked it down a peg, and then saying he's a fan and asking for an autograph, even if said all in one breath, definitely meant it wasn't Jim. The (once) Fearsome Four let out a shared sigh that they didn't know they were holding as they surrounded this… cosplayer, for lack of a better term.

"Could've fooled me, you're his splitting image, I tell you what… Well, no, you're smooth. He was more…" Mike takes a second to mess up his face feathers, making it look like he'd been sleeping face down for a month. "Gruff, yeah? You look like a baby in comparison."

"Hey! I'll have you know I saved this city from complete annihilation!"

"What was that about a poster, kiddo?" Jack interjects, leaning over Mike's shoulder. "I guess it's the least we can do for saving our city, and in turn us. Not going to lie, it's been a while since I've signed a poster, ever since I started selling --"

"Tupperware?! I have your entire collection, you weren't lying when you said those things could last!"

Jack had to stop and blink for a second, even if his brain automatically had him fetch a pen from an inner pocket. The guy was a "hero", yet here he was fanboying over a tupperware salesman. "Haha, well, I don't like having my face attached to cheap products, what can I say. So, who do we make it out to be?"

"Uh… Darkwing… Duck?"

"Creative," Dan adds with a snicker, but takes the pen from Jack anyway to sign the poster.

"Short notice, what can I say, I came as soon as I heard that they had you guys locked up in here, after making sure the interdimensional evil-doers were in their respective places of course!" The masked duck before them poses in what they guess he thinks is a heroic pose, and out of politeness they don't mention that it makes him look like an absolute tool.

"So those… look-alikes, they're gone? Oh, I never realized quite how frightening our characters were at the time, it was just a silly children's cartoon…" Genuinely, all that Toni wanted now was to crawl home and pass out for a week straight, even if he might miss a weeks worth of work. He felt like it was only fair!

"Darkwing Duck guarantee! I would tell more in hopes of assuring you, but it's all classified, I'm sure you can understand. Just know that there's a real hero watching St. Canard now! Petty thug or super-villain, I'm your guy!"

The poster goes from hand to hand, and they all sign it before giving it back, and the excitement the masked duck shows for it is a little nice, as Jack had mentioned previously. Usually Jim hogged all the attention at fan meetings, whether the fan wanted it or not.

"Oh Launch… I mean, LP is going to eat his scarf when he sees this! You guys have just made a hero's day! Say, would it be too much if I asked for a h--"

"Yeah, no, too much." Dan deadpanned, and everyone agreed wholeheartedly, instead offering a handshake instead, which is gladly taken.

"So, what are your plans now? I could give one of you a ride!" Wringing his hat between his hands, this Darkwing Duck wannabe looked like he wanted to tag along with them, as if he expected them to act like they did on the show, and an awkward look was shared between the four of them. How to gently let this guy down… Seriously, they didn't need a vigilante deciding reality equals fiction -- IGNORING THE EVENTS OF LAST NIGHT.

"Thanks but no thanks, my plan is to go home, pass out, and forget this ever happened." Answer, you just don't, it's a grown man for quack's sake. Mike drops the cape corner he was inspecting and waltzes out the door, his hat jingling behind him.

It didn't take much for everyone else to follow after.

"Pretty much." "Ditto." "I'm still not certain it wasn't an overly elaborate dream."

Not taking a hint, Darkwing Duck follows after them, waving as they all squeeze into Toni's little car. "Good thinking, guys! Just remember, if there's trouble --"

"You call DW!" Alright, he could have that one freebie on the house, Jack decided, even if everyone else in the car stink eyed him for indulging the masked weirdo. "What, it is a catchy tune!"

The car wasn't the only thing grumbling as it drove off.

[darkarfs]

the worst movie tie-ins in the history of wrestling

Wrestling is stupid, and will show its ass at the mere mention of cross-promotion, especially when it comes to movies, which is it's cooler older brother that can get away with a lot more. Hell, the 2nd ever SummerSlam's main event, in 1989, was Hulk Hogan facing the main villain, Tiny Lister as Zeus (RIP), from the film they were both in, No Holds Barred. So wrestling's always wanted a piece of that. So... - Army of the Dead Let's just get this one out of the way. Here's the thing; I thought the WrestleMania Backlash's card was fucking perfect...except for this weird business. WMB MIGHT've been the best show of the pandemic (hot take) were it not for making sure we sell Big Dave's big zombie heist movie. If they had just kept some of the guys in zombie makeup on the Thunderdome's webcam footage, that would have been borderline charming. But instead, the Miz (who was WWE champion 3 months ago, don't forget) and Damien Priest (who they're making WWE's pop-culture liaison so far on the main roster, for some reason) had to sell for zombies in a lumberjack match. If this was the first ever wrestling show you watched with a loved one who had never watched wrestling or hadn't since like, the end of the Attitude Era, would you for a second want them to stick around after Miz and Morrison get, for all intents and purposes, kayfabe killed and eaten, and then watch Damien Priest shoot the logo at the ceiling? My money's on "no." - Shaft Speaking of the Attitude Era, anytime someone tells you that wrestling was cooler in that 3-year time frame, point them to the June 15th of 2000 episode of SmackDown, where a storyline that ran throughout the show followed Patterson and Briscoe through New York City to find Crash Holly and his Hardcore Title. Now, I admit parts of this are kinda funny, like Briscoe just wanting to give up and find a "gen-yoo-WINE New York hot dawg!" That's fun! And who does Crash Holly run into but none other than Shaft, and his woman, the only one who understands this complicated man, John Shaft. So, we have real Samuel L. Jackson, playing fake John Shaft, talking to real/fictional Crash Holly, and man is it weird. Anyway, Shaft agrees to be Crash's bodyguard for the night, and he slaps around Patterson and Briscoe in a nightclub. After all, what better way to get across how cool and badass a character is than having him knock around the fucking Stooges? - The Wrestler Well, this is complicated. The Wrestler, starring ancient wooden lion Mickey Rourke, is a somber tale about an industry that, in its heyday, left people physically spent, washed-up and addicted to adrenaline at best, and dead at worst. It famously moved Roddy Piper to tears because he recognized what destruction and brokenness the industry once left in its wake. Which is why it's super-weird that WWE jumped at the chance to promote maybe the bleakest possible look at their world in 2009, and did so by having Chris Jericho smack the shit out of three old wrestlers at WrestleMania 25, including Roddy Piper. And then have Rourke jump into the ring, wearing his "do you want to take peyote in the desert?" starter kit and bring out his amateur boxing chops. Tonally, it's just really bleak. Like if the creator of Super Size Me screened the premiere at the world's biggest McDonald's. - Bride of Chucky Poor Rick Steiner. You didn't deserve this. You're the sane Steiner. They shouldn't have made you talk to the puppet. So, WCW was heading into Halloween Havoc 1998, and after years of stomping all over the WWF in the ratings, the wheels had come off, and dramatically. Like, all at once. Like the car in the Blues Brothers. To boost PPV buys, they spent a fortune bringing in the Ultimate Warrior to rekindle a feud with Hulk Hogan, mostly by hiding in his fucking mirror. And the Steiner Brothers, one of the best teams of the early 90s, had been feuding with one another since Scott turned on his at SuperBrawl. What was the best way to build hype around this match at Halloween Havoc? Why, to have Rick get into a war of words - and lose - to Chucky. Yes.

Serial killer doll voiced by Brad Dourif, and it's so sad. Chucky cusses Rick out while Rick challenges the fucking doll to a fight, which is promptly ignored (Chucky's video segment is pre-recorded, and you can tell because he starts talking about 3 times in 3 minutes while Rick's mid-promo and missing his cues to stop) and then is made fun of. And all the while, people were probably wondering "what's going on on Vince's show?" and the answer is...that was the episode of Raw where Austin fills Vince's Corvette with cement, which is slightly more badass than being teased by a puppet. - The Goods Here's the thing: Raw is, right now, a bad show. It is bad TV. It's been bad for a while now. And as bad as it is right now, it's still not as fuck-awful as it was in 2009, aka the Age of the Guest Hosts (which, in kayfabe, was given to us by Donald J. Trump, so blame that ambulatory Nazi scrotum for one more thing, he's certainly earned it). For those of you fortunate enough to not be watching what was objectively unwatchable at the time - and hell, I sure as shit wasn't checking in very often - from mid-2009 to around mid-2010, a celebrity would be the special guest host of Monday Night Raw, often to promote a TV show or movie, and it was nearly all horribly-written, cheesy wank. Imagine if every week was the week of the zombie attack at Backlash. That's what it was like. Bob Barker was funny. The Muppets were good. And THAT'S the end of the list. MacGruber coming out to blow up R-Truth made me want to fall on a knife. The A-Team coming out to beat up Virgil was fucking awful. Go straight to fucking HELL, the Three Stooges, Dennis Miller, the reverend Al Sharpton, the 2010 Pittsburgh Steelers, Don Johnson and Jon Heder, the poor entire cast of Hot Tub Time Machine...and then there's Piven. Jeremy Piven. He showed up with Ken Jeong to promote a movie no one remembers...called the Goods. He stunk up several segments, infamously called SummerSlam "the Summer Fest" and then got roughed up by John Cena. Wrestling's the worst. Stop watching. And many did. For a looooooong time. - Robocop 2 This one's infamous, so I'll keep it brief. Robocop 2 came out in 1990, and goddamn, I don't know how much money the producers threw at WCW, but it was enough for them to rebrand an entire PPV "Capitol Combat: the Return of Robocop" and marketed the entire thing around the fancy metallic gentleman. The branding really made it seem like Robert Cop was old friends with the promotion, and indeed, old friends with Sting. Makes sense; two big, heroic idiots running on BASIC. He had been feuding with the Four Horsemen, who locked him in a cage at ringside. Out comes Robocop, called completely straight by Jim Ross, who rips the cage door off his hinges, and then leaves. An accumulated 85 seconds of screen time. Totally worth being the centerpiece of this PPV! But a little context as to why WCW fans hated it so much: 1989, the year before, was regarded by WCW fans as one of the best in company history. The era that gave us stuff like Chi-Town Rumble and the still-very-much-lauded peak of the Steamboat/Flair feud. To go from that to Robocop was seen as a bit of a slap in the face, because WCW was always seen as the more traditional "wrasslin'" company and was never into cheesy pop-culture crossovers, which is why the last one...is all the funnier.

- Ready To Rumble First of all, those dumbasses at Turner had to give Michael Buffer - who they still had on retainer - around $350,000 just to use that title, because he owns the trademark to that phrase. Strike 127 million, capitalism, that a guy gets to own a phrase and gets paid an obscene amount when he or anyone else uses it. Secondly, I initially wasn't going to do movies where the promotion itself is producing the movie, or oh holy HELL would See No Evil and the infamous May 19 shit be on here. But unlike See No Evil, this had a hand in killing a decades-old wrestling promotion, so it feels weird to not include it. On April 7th, 2000, bad movie Ready To Rumble was released, a film about two hapless dorks trying to help Oilver Platt, aka the lawyer from the West Wing, become WCW World Heavyweight Champion. Two weeks later, to promote the movie, they made David Arquette, the lead actor in the movie, the WCW World Heavyweight Champion. He pinned Eric Bischoff, who wasn't the champion, of course, in a match where he was teamed with Diamond Dallas Page, his best pal and the company's top babyface at the time, but who is also one of the villains in the film to make it extra confusing for the mainstream casual audience the movie was made to attract. And, to be fair, Arquette didn't want to do it, NO ONE really wanted to do it, and it tanked viewership for WCW once and for all. At the very least, David took his payday from the wrestling appearances and the film and gave it to the families of Owen Hart, Brian Pillman and to Darren Drozdov, who had been paralyzed from the neck down in a wrestling match the previous year.

[prompt-master]

You're always up for discussion and debate right? So is it okay that I pose this to you and you give me your opinion on it? Danganronpa V3 was the worst game in the series because while it had interesting characters and very (visually and aesthetically) pleasing executions it ruined the immersion of the DR universe by playing the 'Oh it's all just a game and anime in this universe!!! Ha ha' card (gonna do a pt2 so I can continue giving my points hope that's okay)

(pt2) Because they played this card I feel like it was a cop out in a way, an excuse to make more content but without a way to fit the game into the existing canon without shoe horning it in, which the creators clearly didn't want to do given the details they put so much effort into. I just personally think, as I've said, it takes away from the immersion but also that it discredits the meaning behind the other games intertwining storylines and characters (2/3)

(pt 3/3) and to me that was what sold me on the series, the fact that in the games world these were real people, these were *kids* and their actions had effects on the world around them and V3 making it so that it was fake in universe and then trying to make it so that people willingly put themselves into a killing game to me just... didn't work. One of the key points of THH was how *disgusting* the killing games were, that it was morbid and sick that Junko aired them. Anyway, your thoughts pls?

-------------------------------------------------

Yes I am always up for discussion and debate! I find them to be some of my favorite things I have done on this blog and I thank you for taking the time to pose this topic to me because it’s one that I’m actually very interested in.

See,you are certainly not alone in your opinion! And I wholeheartedly understand why the games ending is disappointing! Because it is! By design the game was MADE to upset us as fans. But I actually have a very strong disagreement with the assertion that it is the worst game in the series. In fact I think ndrv3 was better than sdr2, which is often called the best game in the series by fans.

The reason why I feel so strongly that ndrv3 is not the worst game in the series..is because of udg. I don’t want to go into too much detail on this particular post, but udg has a lot of irredeemable content for grossly handling incredibly serious and sensitive topics. If a game makes me feel like the FBI should be coming to my house I would not consider that a good game. Not to mention that unlike ndrv3 which aside from the ending you can see a LOT of effort put into it, udg feels incredibly lackluster and uncared for. The models used look unpolished, giving the game a beta testing feel that does not feel professional whatsoever. The lighting has a lot of issues to the point where Komaeda’s hair looks grey, even in key scenes, but no one bothered to fix that glaring issue. The model movements are awkward. The story is repetitive and rather face value, I often find myself thinking about how in the end Komaru still was on the side of hope, she did not defy being like her brother that she so strongly wanted to defy. The gameplay is also too easy and boring, but thats my personal issue. and finally when I learned that they dropped the idea of the game being about capturing the remnants I just found myself disappointed..far more disappointed than ndrv3 made me. Especially since udg wasn’t attempting to be unsatisfying.

Now as for the reasons that I actually quite like ndrv3...I understand that the last leg of chapter 5 and chapter 6 as a whole as a complete let down. But even right after playing I did enjoy how you could rework the ending to fit in the dr canon by having everything still be real. There’s a lot of evidence supporting Shirogane, and there’s a lot of evidence against her. As mystery game lovers it is our job to take these bits of evidence and try to work out what the truth is to the best of our ability. The ending is designed to be disappointing yes but the ending ALSO implies that they WILL find out about HPA, so that it may exist. And if HPA is real, so is everyone. (personally I believe that the first games are a long time ago due to 53 seasons being a lot. and that the outlandishness led to people forgetting that it was real and processing it as fiction)

I also feel as though I had a lot more fun in ndrv3 than I did sdr2. sdr2 I felt like had a lackluster start and a lot of missed opportunities from chapters 1 to 4. The redeeming quality of the game comes from chapters 5 and 6, where suddenly the game picks up incredible pace and goes out VERY strongly. In a way, ndrv3 is the exact opposite of sdr2. ndrv3 begins with THE strongest beginning in the series without a doubt (I partially blame HOW GOOD chapter 1 was for why chapter 6 was so disappointing, it’s hard to live up to such a good chapter), chapters 2-5 I felt held up pretty damn strong as well before Kiibo got his antenna knocked off. Because of this I had a lot more fun experiences in ndrv3 than I did in sdr2, making me consider ndrv3 as a whole the better game. I also really enjoy the characters and the depth to them. There is so much to analyze in ndrv3, and I really enjoy how every character is more affected by the themes of the game than the others, which felt rather concentrated around a select few individuals. The game is intense, although pessimistic, and if you look more into it the more intriguing the character relationships become. 

Of course, you’re entirely right about the ending shooting down the series. In fact i think it was fairly obvious that it was a direct message to us as fans. You say that the game was made to allow for an excuse to make more content but I argue it’s an excuse to NOT make more content. To add another game to the series after the way ndrv3 ended would quite simply feel WRONG. And you have every right to be upset and annoyed at this and the way the writers handled it! But again, the interpretation of reality that shirogane gave us...it almost feels like they WANT us to prove her wrong with all the contradictions. Now, this could absolutely be the writers not having a real ending and wanting US to write it, but as a mystery lover and a person who loves rewrites I don’t necessarily mind this. In fact I wish the ending didn’t ruin the game for a lot of people. There is a lot of really good things to discuss and analyze about the game but it doesn’t happen too often because of this disappointment. But I sincerely encourage you and others to look closer! There is a lot of gold to be found here, with or without the ending!

[murasaki-murasame]

Thoughts on Higurashi Gou Ep11

*Rika voice* we poppin’ the BIGGEST bottles next week when we successfully tear apart fate and reclaim our happy ending! :)

Anyway, thoughts under the cut.

I think we can all agree that there’s no way in hell this is going to go as smoothly as this episode wants us to think it will, when we still have 13 episodes left to go before this all ends, lol.

Obviously this won’t play out exactly the same as Minagoroshi, but even Minagoroshi ended with everyone getting brutally murdered because they didn’t actually manage to achieve the proper win condition, so going into this type of scenario was never really a good sign anyway.

And yeah on that note, this episode takes a hard swerve into full on Minagoroshi mode, which I figured might happen, but not in such a 1:1 way. But the fact that it’s suddenly lining up so much with that arc just makes me even more suspicious that we’re being given a false sense of hope.

Obviously the bottom line is that one way or another, this isn’t Minagoroshi, it’s Tataridamashi, and the overall situation is distinctly different. Like how Ooishi is on bad terms with Keiichi this time around, unlike in Minagoroshi, so they’re probably going to have a much harder time getting the large-scale protesting done if he decides not to help them. Which might also lead to the Sonozaki family refusing to help them either.

I also get the feeling that even if Keiichi has been successfully convinced by his dream to not murder Teppei, it still feels like both Rena and Shion are on the brink of going off the deep end, and if their attempts to handle the situation via peaceful protesting gets shut down by the cops this time, that might push them over the edge.

And even though I have mixed feelings about the ‘Satoko culprit theory’, I’m becoming increasingly convinced that the big twist of this arc will be that Teppei already got murdered off-screen by Satoko before anyone else could get to him, and she’s been lying about it.

Specifically I don’t like the idea of her being some kind of villain who’s intentionally and maliciously lying about being abused to get away with murder, but I think it’d make a lot of sense if we find out that Satoko did something like accidentally overdose Teppei with his medication, or push him down a flight of stairs in an abrupt fit of her syndrome, and then afterward she might enter the stage we saw in Tatarigoroshi where she straight up hallucinates that he’s still alive. So even if he’s dead, she might not be intentionally lying about it.

I can at least imagine a scenario where the gang [or at least part of the gang] gets fed up once and for all and breaks into Teppei’s house to murder him, but they find his corpse instead. And in a Tatarigoroshi type of way, maybe Satoko will see them and assume that they’re the ones that killed him, and everything will go to shit.

Then there’s also the whole separate question of what’s going on with Takano and Tomitake, and the statue in the Saiguden, and so on. We should at least get some more clues about that stuff before the question arcs end.

This episode is also making me even more confused about how much Rika actually knows about what’s going on, and what arcs she actually remembers. She seems to directly quote Keiichi from Minagoroshi in this episode [I think], but even in the VN they stated that she completely forgot what happened in that arc, and Hanyuu had to tell her about it later.

But her being more active in this episode and thinking that they actually have a shot at winning this is kinda just making it even more strange that she hasn’t said or done anything about the Takano situation. Especially since the entire deal with Minagoroshi in the first place was that they assumed dealing with Teppei in a timeline where neither Rena or Shion go L5 was enough to get a happy ending, but then Takano came around and killed everyone. So the fact that she seems to have basically the exact same mentality she had in Minagoroshi after Keiichi convinced her she could change fate makes it feel like she’s in the exact same position of thinking that Takano isn’t important.

And then there’s the fact that in ep2 she talks about ‘knowing who kills Furude Rika’ and how they all achieved their happy ending, so really there’s just a lot of conflicting information going on here, lol. I honestly can’t tell if it’s intentional, or if it’s literally just weird writing and Rika is acting ‘out of character’ because having her immediately reveal the Takano situation would spoil new fans.

I can’t exactly deny that it might just be a weird writing issue that we shouldn’t think much about, but I think it’s more interesting to try and think about what it could mean if this apparent contradiction in Rika’s level of knowledge and her actions in Gou thus far is actually intentional and meaningful.

I haven’t entirely ironed out my theory about this yet, but my current idea is that the whole meta-structure of Gou is that it’s basically a series of fictional stories created by Rika and Featherine together after the events of Matsuribayashi, and the Rika we see in Gou is effectively just a fictional character in this story who doesn’t actually align fully with Rika from the VN.

Specifically I think that Gou’s whole story is basically written from the premise of being a what-if fanfiction of sorts, where the Rika we see in Gou is more or less based on Rika’s character as of the end of Meakashi, or maybe Tsumihoroboshi. So she starts off in Gou at the point where she’s already figured out the basic rules of the gameboard, but doesn’t actually know about Takano, and also hasn’t experienced in any timelines where they successfully deal with Teppei, and she maybe also hasn’t seen any of her friends start to remember past timelines yet.

And I think the way they might explain what we see Rika say in ep2 of Gou is that Tataridamashi is actually the first arc chronologically in Gou, and it might with a deceptively happy ending where everyone on paper gets their happy ending, and everyone even survives long enough for Rika to go to high-school, but then she winds up dead there, and it’s after that point that Rika wakes up in ep2.

I don’t even necessarily think this would be incompatible with the idea of this arc going off the deep end and going in a more tragic direction. Maybe Teppei does end up dying one way or another, but everyone else survives, not even Satoko goes L5, and Teppei’s murder gets successfully covered up and everyone just goes back to living their lives. And because of whatever’s clearly been changed behind the scenes with Takano, the GHD never happens, so everyone just assumes they managed to achieve their happy ending by killing Teppei. But then Rika ends up dying a few years later in high-school anyway, in a way that ties into whatever the actual mystery of Gou is that all the characters are missing. At the very least I think teenage Satoko is gonna end up being the one to kill teenage Rika, and I could easily see that happening in a timeline where Teppei dies and she doesn’t immediately go off the deep end, but still has psychological scarring that nobody is fully aware of or properly deals with. So maybe she ends up becoming secretly resentful of Rika and all of her friends, blaming them for what happened, and she winds up killing Rika because of it.

I think this would actually pretty neatly explain the apparent contradiction of Rika talking about ‘knowing who killed her’ and ‘getting her happy ending’, while coming across like she genuinely doesn’t understand what’s actually going on. Her wording to Hanyuu in ep2 was always intentionally vague, but instead of just being about hiding the truth from new fans, maybe it was a multi-layered twist where what she’s talking about is totally different to what VN readers assume she means. Maybe the happy ending she meant was Tataridamashi, with everyone killing Teppei, and the person who kills her is Satoko.

She did act like she knows who kills her in *every* timeline, but if Rika in this arc is effectively pre-Minagoroshi, and this ends with a version of events where Takano never kills anyone and the GHD never happens, and it’s Satoko who kills Rika, that might lead Rika to falsely assume that her death in at least most of the timelines is just a result of Satoko going L5 and killing her.

Gou’s whole deal seems to be based on the idea that Rika is acting on false information, so I think it’d make sense if we find out that the truth she talked so confidently about knowing in ep2 was totally misleading.

One thing I’ve also been considering that might support this is that we see what at least seems to be teenage Satoko in the OP, but given that they’re going to change the show’s subtitle for the second half, they might change the OP too, which would imply that we’ll see teenage Satoko before this arc ends. Which makes me think that there’ll be some kind of timeskip epilogue at the end of the arc, and it’d be pretty likely at that point for that to be the big pivotal thing that happened with Rika as a teenager.

It’d also just flow better for new fans if the timeskip stuff with them in high-school takes place after one of Gou’s arcs, rather than Matsuribayashi, since that’d be kinda confusing and make new fans feel like they’re missing out on vital information.

Either way, like most people I think most of Gou’s central mystery is going to revolve around Satoko, and I think ultimately it’s gonna boil down to the question of what it would truly take to ‘solve’ all of her personal problems, and whether or not just getting rid of Teppei would be enough. For one thing, I imagine this arc will also still leave Satoshi’s whereabouts completely up in the air, which is another bit of unresolved trauma for Satoko.

More broadly than that, though, I feel like the Gou gameboard is Featherine’s way of giving her own perspective on the original story of Higurashi, and being like ‘if I take control of the story and introduce a new element to get rid of Takano before she does anything, does that automatically mean that everyone will get their happy ending, or is it more complicated than that?’. And I think this arc might be the best representation of that, where everything seemingly goes well for everyone, and Takano seems to never do anything evil, but everything still goes to shit anyway because of the various issues that the main characters still have even if Takano is dealt with.

I’m not sure exactly what new elements Featherine could bring to the board, and how it could lead to Takano being dealt with in every arc, but it probably has to do with what Takano found in the Saiguden, and also the fact that Featherine herself literally appears in the Saiguden in the OP.

I won’t get into super explicit details about Umineko here, but I think that Umineko Ep5 gives a pretty good example of how a new author can take control of a gameboard and insert a new ‘piece’ in order to achieve some new goal.

Anyway, once we get into the second half, I think the next arc will basically just be a version of Meakashi that acts as Watadamashi’s answer arc. We’ll probably spend about three episodes on Shion and Satoshi’s whole backstory from Meakashi [mixed with some of the flashbacks from Matsuribayashi], and then the arc will end with showing Shion and Mion’s perspective on Watadamashi, which I don’t think would take very long if they just focus on showing what they were doing in some of the important scenes. And some of it still might be left a little intentionally ambiguous.

Then I think that either whether they label it as it’s own arc or just treat it as part of one big final arc, we’ll get around three episodes that show Onidamashi from Rena’s POV, which would basically serve as a substitute for Tsumihoroboshi, and we’ll finally get an explicit reveal of how Keiichi hallucinated part of their fight scene. It might play out in the exact same way, but I could also see it seeming like a 1:1 retelling of Onidamashi at first, that then diverts at the last minute by having Keiichi remember the truth of what really happened in Onidamashi after he invites Rena into his house, in time for him to talk her down from killing him. Then after that I think we’ll basically get Gou’s take on Matsuribayashi, where everyone properly tackles the real issues and mysteries going on, to achieve a proper happy ending.

I’m not really confident about a lot of this, but I think it all more or less makes sense, especially since I’ve been thinking for a while that Gou will probably end up being much more of a remake than a full on sequel.

And then in the final episode we might get a glimpse at the ‘outside world’ where Rika/Bern is going over Featherine’s manuscript version of Gou, to help explain the whole framing device.

Also, I’m still wondering if Lambda is gonna play into Gou’s story at all, going by how we’re more or less already dealing with Bern, and Featherine has shown up in the OP and will presumably come into play later on. It’d feel a bit weird to have those two show up but not Lambda.

I feel like it’d be much harder to provide context for her whole deal compared to those two, though, but if Gou is effectively a fictional story in-universe, then she doesn’t necessarily need to follow the same logic she did in the VN. She was technically already present [but unmentioned] in the VN as being the witch who provided Takano with her blessing of certainty, so maybe she’s going to do the same for Satoko here instead [and maybe her not providing Takano with her blessing within the context of Gou is part of how Featherine is ‘dealing with her’]. Maybe a post-Tataridamashi Satoko ends up making a deal with Lambda as a result of her years of unresolved trauma and whatnot. Maybe she wants to go back in time to stop herself [or her friends] from killing Teppei, and Lambda agrees to provide her with the power to turn back time.

And along those lines, I’m also wondering if that might be part of why the Saiguden statue’s hand is undamaged in Gou. We’ve seen how Satoko thinks that she got cursed when she did that, and that it caused everything in her life to go to shit, so maybe she specifically wants to go back in time to prevent that incident from happening. And like I’ve also theorized, maybe the statue is undamaged in the first two Gou arcs because they happen chronologically after this one, and start from the premise of Satoko avoiding that incident.

Anyway, this is a whole lot of wild speculation that might not turn out to be true at all, lol. For one thing, even though I think teenage Satoko will show up in this arc because she’s in the OP, I’m not sure if or even how Featherine might appear in this arc, and that might really take things in a whole new direction I can’t predict.

[cautelous]

arcane bellyaching & whatnot feel free to look away it’s mostly rambling and the result of me being up early for other reasons. also talking about politics i guess if that isn’t your thing

damn they really did pull the “what side are you on? the oppressors or the oppressed? both sides are weighted as the same by this statement, and also here’s some animated police brutality!” thing huh

like yeah sure of course i’m not saying that piltover pre-the-present-day has to be perfect and whatnot (nor does present-day piltover have to be perfect either, but... idk, not a fan of this direction!) and of course that is me speaking about old, independent, single-city piltover - i guess this new one can be as corrupt as it wants for as long as it wants - but like, insanely uncomfortable to have just talked about the way that caitlyn’s outfits and abilities and general thing have become less “detective” and more “militarized cop” and how everyone is eating that up because it’s hot that she has more clothes and it’s hot that she has a SWAT outfit only for. ok here is our trailer with a scene of policemen physically breaking up protests! (of course people do seem to be cringing somewhat at that, which is good, and i am not saying that a work of art/piece of media can’t talk about such things, but like. do we trust riot to?)

like even if that scene is from the past (which considering that arcane seems to be both in the past and present, eh, 50/50) then the implication is just that current piltover hasn’t solved whatever issue caused said protest and also hasn’t stopped brutalizing, because current piltover lore has such delightful color stories as “caitlyn electrocutes someone with a bola net” and “vi lectures rich pilties and physically threatens them for breaking windows for the ~zaunite cause~”. the latter is literally just repeating the message that all property damage in protests is the work of outside forces and actually good real actual protesters are completely peaceful :), you see, and so any property damage during a protest immediately discounts its legitimacy. so like. (and secondarily, child of zaun portrays zaunites as easily swayed by a demagogue, unlike those Very Smart Piltovians and Vi, Who’s Not Really Accepted As Fully Zaunite Anymore You See And That’s Her Character Struggle.)

so either a) nothing has gotten better since however many years in the past that scene in arcane was or b) this is the present, and the present in this work of fiction is just. mirroring reality’s present, which is just... i dunno. i think that a fictional world so apart from our own (to the extent that there’s no homophobia, at least from word-of-god, but idk i also have thoughts on that declaration) can do better than 1:1 mirror our world’s police brutality and class struggles. but i’m always an idealist who’d like to see media do more than darkness for the sake of darkness, or repeat reality for the sake of repeating reality and nothing more.

anyways idk man hope they don’t impart absolutely horrid themes in their multi-million-dollar project (or however much this ended up costing) but considering this starting point i am not very sure of that!

anyways idk x2 there’s totally a way to do a piltover-zaun "cities at war” narrative in old lore framing that shows both the struggles of piltover and zaun and compares and contrasts them. piltover “wins” in that framework because zaun is a hypercapitalist hellhole and old piltover’s implications are closer to a steampunk utopia than anything else, but i think the point of that narrative wouldn’t be “see, both sides are bad! and good! equally! just a big old moral perfectly-balanced scale!” like this seems to be shaping up to be, but like. showing that there is goodness and good people even under the most soul-crushing of states (zaun. and also a narrative that i think is important, considering how often we confuse being a citizen of a country for being a follower of that country’s government’s ideology) and that a good nation* and good lives for its citizens has to be worked for with blood, sweat, and tears - and even then it is so easy to fall back into old patterns of behavior and fall upon old prejudices and backslide into a “more comfortable” (for some), but worse society (piltover. and, again, also a narrative that i think is important).

*i have many thoughts about if a nation can be “truly good”, but i would be mad if i thought league or most media would touch the idea of a stateless society with a ten-foot pole. so we’re just working within reason here.

i dunno. tl;dr not very excited at riot choosing to tackle police brutality in their fun animated series for fans when their track record with revolutionaries is what it is. (yes xayah and rakan are portrayed in a positive light yes that’s the gottem everyone uses for when people bring up how xerath and sylas are treated. there are multiple types of revolutionaries and the lovebirds are of a stripe (a feather?) that is easier to market.) not very excited (still, what a surprise) about zaun being squeezed into entirely being the poor underclass, because i feel like that nukes a lot of narratives you could have done with old zaun that would, you know, be directly critical of capitalism and whatnot. there are very interesting stories to tell with these two cities, and i’ve told some of them and my friends have told some of them, and i am just tired of this... bottom-of-the-barrel gritty-to-be-gritty low-hanging-fruit take that riot has chosen. i think that a company, even one making a mass-market game, who tries so hard to convince everyone that they have serious lore for serious people can and should do better than this.

what do i close this ramble with. go play disco elysium? yeah. let’s go with that. go play disco elysium. i like it and think it does a variety of complex themes that other works can only dream of.

[sebastianshaw]

I'M HERE TO YELL ABOUT THE WEREMOLES AGAIN THEY'RE REALLY AMAZING AND INTERESTING AND UNIQUE AND I LOVE THEM

-While a lot of the other Changing Breeds all dislike each other for one reason or another, or at best just don't interact, the moldwarps actually had it in their laws to aid their cousins in their respective duties for which Gaia created each of them, but -- "Killing Sceatha with the Garou, allowing Ratkin to travel to Run’s End, or showing the Moldwarp Burrows to other Breeds’ Kinfolk all fall outside of the realms of acceptable aid." CLEARLY THE RATKIN DID SOMETHING LIKE I HAVE NO DOUBT THERE IS GOOD REASON FOR THAT RULE (the wererats are chaos incarnate and I love them) -k so there is basically a trinity of spirits in this setting, the Triat---the Wyld, the Weaver, the Wyrm. Generally speaking, everyone is fighting the Wyrm and sometimes also the Weaver. But the moldwarps seek true balance between all three. And there's a small group of them called Apes Redeemers who want to basically exorcise the Weaver AND Wyrm out of human beings--- "Redeemers take humans in direct service to the Weaver, or with strong behavioural traits in its favour, and attempt to cleanse them through a mixture of psychological abuse, isolation, and repurposed rites. Freethinking Moldwarps shun this Hill’s ideals as quite beyond the pale, but Redeemers hold up examples of humans who have been forced into bestial states of primitive regression, the Weaver’s hold utterly stripped away, as evidence that their methods are in fact effective." (The Weaver is like...organization, society, technology, tools, etc. Normal humans are very much Weaver creatures.) - AW BUT THERE ARE ALSO PLAGUE DOCTOR MOLDWARPS WHO GO TO DISEASE RIDDEN AREAS TO TREAT PEOPLE - In addition to being the jailers of Gaia, they are also the undertakers, burying the dead of other creatures - There are different “Warrens” or types of weremole, based on their role in weremole society and the jobs they have. Most notable to me are the Cleansers and the Wardens. Cleansers “strive to emulate the motherly aspect of Gaia in all that they do. Calm and considerate, their lot is to cure the fallen, correcting their spiritual bearing and keeping them healthy during their stay in the Den. Sadly, despite their caring natures, Cleansers make for arguably the worst weremoles to act as the face of a Sett while interacting with other Fera. Speaking of tainted beings as patients needing treatment wins few friends in the wider shapeshifter community, and Cleansers find it difficult to adjust to the more punitive mindset broadly shared by most Fera.” “ They act as their communities’ confidants and carers, conduits for the worries, stresses, and strains which would otherwise hinder important work” “ Passionate and creative both in conflict and at peace, Cleansers tend to the Burrows’ feeding, nursing, and childrearing tasks outside of their main duties” “ Most Cleansers adopt a calm and measured persona following their Vision Crawl, and are incredibly difficult to infuriate.” Whereas the Wardens are “the closest thing a Burrow has to a standing force of warriors” and “the least empathic of all Warrens. Where Cleansers are the good cops, the Wardens are their counterparts, expected to keep Sceatha in line by any means necessary for them to be successfully rehabilitated. They embody force, conviction, and authority, and are granted Gifts which reflect such qualities in order to contain and recover the corrupted.” “ these Moles are tough, courageous, and stoic. These qualities are much called upon, for it is their burden to contain, monitor, and protect Sceatha held in captivity” “ Wardens embody intimidation, conviction, and authority in every action they take. This can sometimes be expressed with the exciting encouragement of an elder sibling, the sternness of a loving parent, or the detached professional attitudes of their human namesakes.” There are others, like Trackers and Diggers and Architects, but those are more concerned with burrowing tunnels or simply finding/retrieving Sceatha (Wyrm-tainted or otherwise corrupt creatures in need of healing/rehabilitation) rather than actually guarding and treating them, so they’re of less interest to me. The Diggers do also make tunnels in the Umbra, which is the spirit world, which is a pretty cool concept. - Their Homid (human) forms are as wonderfully unglamorous as moles themselves-- “ usually naturally heavy, with excessive body hair and poor eyesight. Their hands and feet are often disproportionately large compared to their small stature and otherwise short limbs, but for these physical shortfalls they make up with greater levels of strength, health, smell, hearing, and directional coordination” A far cry from the ridiculously sexy werewolf boyfriends of paranormal romance fiction. Love it. They also typically have jobs in sanitation or rehabilitation-- “ These individuals find employment as city planners, prison guards and wardens, subway and sewer maintenance operatives, and similar jobs focused around organisation, rehabilitation, and the conservation of resources both material and human. It’s a rare occurrence that an up-and-coming track athlete or singer enters the Vision Crawl.” Again, love it. - Their Crinos form (the hybrid form or “war form”) is HORRIFYING-- “ a large amalgamation of mole and human standing at 7 feet tall and over 80 stone in weight, a hunched monster which could never exist in the natural order of the surface world [. . .] twisted faces and sightless eyes [. . .] Knife-like teeth protrude along the length of their muzzles and shovelling claws grow from each clubbed hand” - Most wereanimals are weak to silver. Some varieties are weak to gold. But weremoles are weak to obsidian and other black gems. - Unlike most wereanimals, moldwarps can become vampires, and these unfortunate creatures are called The Baogane, also known as Bugbears. They are the saddest things I have ever heard of. “ The existence of a Baogane poses burning questions to her Sett. Should she receive an honourable Final Death and be given over to Gaia? Should she be put through arduous cleansing in the small hope it works? Or, more dubiously, should she be allowed to serve the Burrow eternally? Setts who are unfortunate enough to lose one of their own to a Leech make their own decisions on what to do with their fallen kin.” “ Baoganes look similar to how they did in life, save for their fangs being unnaturally long even for vampires. In Crinos form, these fangs splay out either side of their face to resemble the curved tusks of a boar, and sometimes punch through the flesh of their gums and lips. The fur of all forms - even Homid hair - becomes permanently sharp, coarse, and patchy, again similar to that of a boar.” “ Soil does not merely cling to the fur and skin of a Bugbear as it would to any other subterranean creature, but latches on with supernatural power, reflecting the earth’s desire to see such a monster dead and buried. Over the space of but a few nights, the Moldwarp may become so covered in filth and earthen debris that her size and shape cannot be discerned.” “ Baoganes often spend their unlives trapped within cleansing chambers, awaiting rehabilitation that may never come without their much-sought-after destruction. Many are granted the Thing of Salvation, though some willing penitents are denied even that.” The “Thing of Salvation” of course, is final death. The weremoles call very important ceremonies or celebrations, Things. Thing of Deliverance, Thing of the Hill, etc. - I honestly can’t overstate how new and crazy it is they wish to rehabilitate the Wyrm-tainted and save the Wyrm itself. For DECADES the entire point of this game has been FUCK UP THE WYRM’S SHIT. The Wyrm has always been the ultimate evil, even more so than the Weaver who is technically the one at fault for it going crazy, and EVERY wereanimal has had “destroy the Wyrm’s servants” in their own laws. And yet in the weremole’s laws, you’re NOT allowed to kill Sceatha unless your own life is threatened---” Sceatha are not of sound mind and so do not deserve unnecessary harm, irrespective of their most vile actions; only once they are cured are they to be judged as independent beings by the rest of the world. If that judgment is death, then they must be returned to Gaia without delay. Destroying befouled artefacts out of hand, meanwhile, is wasteful and disrespectful of their already-violated spirits.” Like this is just...so out of line from EVERY OTHER WERECREATURE it’s WILD, and it’s no wonder all the other critters are distrustful of them AT BEST. - So, Run’s End, that place they don’t ever let the Ratkin go? It sounds AMAZING, like so beautiful and spooky. It’s this realm “where death and decay occur, but peacefully and purely. This peace, however, is maintained only by the avid cleansing of its space by high-ranking Moldwarps, making it a nigh-impenetrable refuge of solemn deathliness suspended between zones of total corruption. Only by travelling along the Run, or traversing the turbulent dimensions held up by Run’s End to eventually find a border between worlds, may a being enter this place of pure, tranquil death. All is not quite as it should be, of course, for vicious battles constantly rage at the borders of Run’s End” “ The geography of Run’s End is reminiscent of an ancient Mayan jungle, at the heart of which stands a colossal obsidian temple to the Balance Wyrm, the structure in which the Lord of the Run resides beside his High Scrivein, Sanctus, and Thegn. This temple, the Body of Death, plays host to any great debate waged by high-Ranking Moldwarps, including each and every Althing. Around the Body of Death stretches the Fungal Forest, with mycelial growths a hundred metres tall stretching as far as the eye can see, generating natural luminescences of deep purple, dark red, and ochre green. From the unseen roof of the realm slowly descend all manner of remains - of humans, animals, plants, and even concepts, hopes, and dreams long forgotten - like snowflakes, landing gently atop the fungal canopy to be slowly digested. A fine film of red, brown, and green covers the undergrowth, having seeped down from the mushroom caps high above. Amongst these fungi are found equally decomposed but animate carrion beasts of all varieties lapping up the rotting fluids: insects, corvids, and Consumer Worms as long and thick as oak trunks winding amongst the mushroom stumps, soaking in the decay Despite its dire aspect, the fear of death for any being present in the Fungal Forest is simply absent; the fact that death comes for all is readily apparent, but comes as a comfort. Though not part of the Underworld proper, the Forest is a manifestation of final rest. From the gentle dripping of corpse-fluid to the slow undulation of the Consumer Worms, there is no violation or undue destruction in this Forest, only the equalising end of all things. Indeed, all beings who enter Run’s End begin decaying almost immediately; only those with some form of supernatural regeneration, or whose protection has been specifically petitioned for, may withstand it. Equally, the Body of Death allows only full-blooded Moldwarps to enter, with instant death and rapid decomposition coming to all others. At the Obsidian Reach, young and old Moldwarps alike dig to find something that they believe will bring them renown and acclaim, with no actual promise that anything lies beneath. The Obsidian Reach was actually discovered by the Gazers of the Deep during their very first visit. The Reach is infinitely high and wide and consists of solid obsidian, which naturally is almost unbreakable by Moldwarp standards. The stone itself bears the scratch marks and gouges of generations of claws trying to breach its shell. Beyond the stone’s infinite blackness, it has been told, are beings swept up in a storm mocking those who try to reach them, lands of shining cyclopean architecture, and even the resting bodies of mighty but unborn giants. Such claims are overlooked by all but the Gazers, but this does not prevent adventurers from ceaselessly trying to breach this inky vault.” LIKE THIS IS SO EERIE AND UNNERVING AND YET STRANGELY LOVELY AND SOOTHING TO ME? I AM REALLY LOVING MOLDWARP LORE

[taiblogcomics]

Mon-test of Champions

Hey there, fabric faces. Well, it's quite nearly Halloween. As such, I see no reason to spoil the nice holiday with a Red Hood comic. Instead, let's follow what's become something of a tradition for this blog the last couple years. Alas, due to pandemic, I did not return to that used bookstore and pick up more Bailey School Kids like I promised last year. But I do have another excellent treat for you. While this particular book wasn't a major part of my childhood, its author was: Bruce Coville.

I don't think this guy ever wrote a stinker of a book. Maybe some of the Space Brat series, but I think they were directed at a younger audience. But others were really good. The My Teacher is an Alien books were about humanity's place in the universe and their worth as a species. The Aliens Ate My Homework series was ultimately about the importance of being kind. The Magic Shop books were always about self-improvement. The point is, they were great books. I highly encourage you to pick up a few if you've never read any of his work. Now, as for the one we're covering today, it's not really as deep as his other works. But it does suit the season, and that's what's important~

Here's the cover, as photographed by me, because it's really hard to find a decent one on Google:

Oh boy, you can really tell by their jeans and high-tops that this is the '80s. Not to mention the audience's haircuts. And indeed, this book was published in 1989. It's actually one of his earlier books. Anyway, the Count here has something to declare, Frankenstein is supportive, and the Mummy's just happy to be here. The Wolfman, however, is looking directly into the camera like a jerk. He's also brought his dinner onstage with him, which is pretty rude. Don't get me started on this tentacle monster, who does not actually appear in the book proper. And thank god for that~

So our protagonist today is Mike McGraw. His mom runs an advertising firm, and his stepdad is a science-fiction author. Mike, however, is your typical teen, bored during the summer. His stepdad suggests he get a job, and furthermore encourages the job to be at his mom's workplace. Mike's actually into it, but his mom needs to be talked into it, so Mike excuses himself to the basement to bring up more drinks. In the basement, Mike is suddenly attacked. But it's okay, it's just his best friend, the unlikely-named Kevver Smith. Mike and Kevver have been friends since early childhood, and even share the same birthday. Kevver's also one up on Mike on their prank war now. Oh boy, just wait until Youtube happens, guys.

The boys return from the basement, and Mom has decided to give the boys a shot at being the office gofers. Kevver is included mostly so Mike doesn't get bored. The book skips a bit to get to their first day, where they meet Wendy Moon, the firm's major artist. She's also extremely dramatic, posing on the floor with an "Art is Dead" sign affixed to her chest. See, their current client wants a very boring design, and Wendy objects because, like, why do you even hire a graphic designer if you're not going to take their suggestions? Also working at the firm is Pete, who is the muscle, I guess. The book is unclear on his actual duties. It's not important.

Anyway, time passes and the pair get used to their new job. Everything seems fine until it isn't. Ed the Plumber, the client Wendy was complaining about, has decided to cancel the contract. He's been talked into it by Myrna Smud, a local activist who runs BAM: Billboards Are Monstrous. Get this: she's not against them for, like, aesthetic reasons. If she thought billboards were an eyesore, I could at least understand that. No, it's because she thinks billboards are too creative. They overstimulate children's imaginations and lead to criminal behaviour. And yes, she's serious. So the firm's in a bad mood because a blank billboard is a drain on the company.

The boys' birthday is coming up, and when asked for present ideas, Mike only has one thought in his head: he wants that billboard. It's going unused now, so why not let him do a goof with it? As usual, Stepdad Jeff talks Mom into it. Taking inspiration from Ms. Smud's ranting, Mike and Kevver collaborate with Wendy to design them a monster billboard. After a long brainstorming session, they come up with something not unlike the cover, inviting people to "Enter the Monster of the Year Contest Today!" With the design created, they reproduce it onto panels, and Pete helps them put it up on display. This has been a good third of the book already, which might be even slower pace than some Goosebumps books~

Fortunately, things do start to kick off now. With the billboard up, people begin to wonder who set it up. They contact the firm, and since the boys aren't trying to keep it a secret, they cop to it immediately. This gets them an invite to be on the radio with their favourite early morning DJ, Skip Toomaloo. And as unlikely a name as that is, you could get away with thinking it's just a radio persona. But no, when they actually go on the show, turns out Skip has a daughter named Lulu. Let me repeat that for you: Lulu Toomaloo. Saddled with a name like this, is it any wonder little Lulu turned into kind of a complete brat, planning revenge on her father at every waking moment? Worse yet, she's also a walking fat joke, since her wrath can be bought off with food. It was still the '80s, and that's what we did with fat characters. Seriously, though, nearly all her lines are her announcing she's hungry. There's probably a reason why this isn't one of Bruce Coville's more beloved books~

Anyway, the real meat of the story starts shortly after they find a cloud of bats conspicuously hanging around the billboard. A day or two later, they start to receive telegrams from Transylvania. Someone's now actively sponsoring the contest, and another someone is coming to enter. After confirming that Transylvania is, in fact, a real place, they decide to humour whoever sent the telegram, just in case it turns out to be true. They head to the airport at the stated time, though the flight ends up delayed, coming in at midnight. How appropriate~

The man who comes to meet them is a little hunchbacked fellow in a labcoat, who introduces himself as Igor. He's a bit harried, and rushes them all off to the baggage claim as quickly as possible. It's a good thing, too, since the plane crew has just unloaded an enormous crate for him. Before they can move it, though, the crate begins to shake. Suddenly a huge green fist smashes through one surface, threatening to burst out of the crate entirely. Either Igor's got a monster in the box, or his illegal Hulk Hands smuggling job is going poorly. Igor springs ahead and uses a syringe of some kind on the open hole in the crate. You can tell this is the '80s, since he managed to get that on the plane with him. The crate calms down and allows itself to be transported out to their car.

They try taking Igor to a hotel (conspicuously named the Karloff Inn), but Igor throws a fit when they won't take his Transylvanian money. Dude, I know your flight got in late, but you should've visited the currency exchange. That's on you, man. Since the hotel won't take him, they agree to put him and his crate up at their house. Igor insists on taking the crate up to the guest room with him. Fortunately, he's strong enough to make it an easy task. They all go to bed, and when they get up, there's a seven-foot green-skinned fellow at the breakfast table. Sounds like a typical Wednesday to me~

So this green fellow. He's exactly who you think he is, but what to call him? Well, this one is named Sigmund, but the brain is from a fellow named Fred. So he's called Sigmund Fred. Mostly the book just calls him Siggie, so that's what this review will do as well. But I will never, ever, ever, ever make a song about the Siggie. DJ Skip drops by, and he lets Igor and Siggie on his radio show so they can rant about how they were treated at the hotel. So at this point they're still debating how much of this is real or a publicity stunt. Even Mike's not sure--at least, until the enormous bat turns up in his room that night.

The bat, of course, quickly turns into a tall, pale man in a neat tuxedo. He introduces himself as "The Count" (and it's always just "the Count"), and assures Mike that he's not here to drink his blood. No, he's looking for hospitality. While Mike goes to clear it with his parents, the Count's coffin is delivered to the house. This is one of the funniest jokes in the whole book, because Stepdad Jeff thinks that vampires are more believable than a delivery service that operates at 3 AM. They set the Count up with a partitioned space in the basement.

At breakfast, it turns out that Siggie/Igor and the Count have a bit of a rivalry. They begin to fight at the breakfast table, both leading up to arguments of whose movies were worse. It only gets interrupted when the doorbell rings and the Creture from the Yucky Lagoon is standing there. We'll just be calling him Goony. Goony's appearance is a bit too convincing for anyone to think it's a costume anymore. (He even confesses they used to put a fake zipper on him for his movies.) And shortly after Goony moves in, someone else comes to the door. He's a perfectly ordinary-looking man, except for his large unibrow. After a comment from Igor, Mike realises he must be a werewolf. Where wolf? Here wolf.

The Mummy shows up overnight and off-screen, and Quasimodo (or "the Quaz" as the book decides to nickname him) also joins them further in the day. Skip invites the group out to dinner at a semi-formal restaurant called Chez Stadium. I see what you did there, Bruce. Anyway, as the group makes a toast to Mike and Kevver for hosting and judging the contest, and that's when Mike suddenly realises he's in deep shit. He's got to pick one of these monsters to make happy--and make the rest of them very angry. Mike tries to steer the conversation to their movies instead. This turns out to be a very bad idea.

Goony is a very sensitive sort and begins crying when teased at how bad his movies are (it's sadly true, one of them was even on Mystery Science Theater). This starts a long discussion and argument. The argument quickly turns physical, with all of the monsters rough-housing and throwing food. And of course, Myrna Smud is also at the restaurant, and she gets a faceful of it. Eventually, the police come and break it up. By the next day, Myrna has changed her BAM! campaign from "Billboards Are Monstrous" to "Ban All Monsters". Wasn't that a Godzilla film?

Hey, speaking of Godzilla, the doorbell rings again and delivers another package to Mike. Inside this one is a miniature, fire-breathing Tyrannosaurus. This is Gadzinga, star of those Japanese monster movies. Everyone knows they use miniatures in those films, right? Gadzinga talks very roughly, but fortunately not anything I would mark as stereotypical or racist. More of a Joey Wheeler Brooklyn accent, really. Which is... weird, but not questionable. They also make mention of a masked phantom in this scene, which is I think the only time it's mentioned. Anyway, to bolster their reputation, they decide to put in some appearances at the local schools.

This goes about as well as you're expecting. Actually, most of it goes pretty good. The Mummy talks to the history classes, Goony sits in on biology, and so forth. But then suddenly, all hell breaks loose. One classroom has cornered Igor, and he's not even a participant in the contest. He's more like Siggie's manager. Nevertheless, the kids are gonzo for Igor, mobbing him like a rockstar and demanding he sign stuff. I dunno, as a kid, I'd've gone for the Count myself. They manage to extricate him from the action, but the news crew catches it on film, leading Myrna Smud to talk more about "corrupting the youth" and "overstimulating the imagination".

And yet, it's finally time for the day of the contest. And of course, on the way there, there's a minor riot by Myrna Smud and her BAM squad. Lulu Toomaloo (who has been a major secondary character throughout, just not interesting enough to mention) actually grabs a megaphone and begins her own counter-protest. Essentially you have two sides shouting "we love monsters" or "ban all monsters" at each other. Eventually it boils over, and only ends up resolved when Kevver whips out their finale show-stopper: a mechanical flag that pops up and plays "The Star-Spangled Banner". Everyone's patriotism is stirred and resolves the issue. Nowadays, you'd think that'd only make things worse~

And now Mike has to make a decision. Struck with sudden inspiration, Mike begins a long speech about what it means to be a monster and how he's gotten to know each of these monsters and understand them over the course of the contest. But there's only one person present tonight to really exemplify what it means to be a monster, to have that ugliness inside and out. And that person is... Myrna Smud! Yes, who else is deserving enough of the title of Monster of the Year than someone who calls to ban a group of people from public appearances and declare they're ruining the children's minds. The other monsters look taken aback, but amusingly give their approval after a moment.

The book wraps up pretty quickly from there. Everyone decides not to sue each other. The monsters depart, keeping in touch with Mike and Kevver by mail. Turns out the whole contest did get them some publicity, and they're pulling in some new endorsement deals. Okay, boys, but if anyone tries to talk you into a "Dark Universe" series of movies, turn them down. It won't end well, I assure you. And the monsters themselves had so much fun tha they're willing to get together for a convention again each year. So watch out, because you never know if they'll host it in your town next~

This book is, honestly, pretty good. It’s one of Bruce Coville’s sillier works, which might also come from being one of his earlier works as well. And if you get down to it, it’s ultimately a story about treating folks with respect. It’s pretty much what all the monsters wanted, and why Myrna ended up worse than the lot of them. You could even argue Lulu fits a bit into that, in that no one likes her because she’s a terrible brat. I gave a very short summary of each scene because honestly it’s mostly a lot of back-and-forth dialogue, and that might be worth reading on your own~

And this Halloween, may you also open your home to the monsters that mean the most to you~

[kob131]

https://spectralscathath.tumblr.com/post/190909103203/fight-analysis-rwby-vs-ace-ops

So let’s start with the set up for the fight, specifically, these quotes from Marrow and Harriet.

Marrow: We’re not actually going to slug this out, are we?

Harriet: We’re not doing anything. They decide what happens next.

This puts a heavy emphasis on the fact that team RWBY starts this fight. They are the aggressors in this situation, which then makes it both incredibly cowardly and utterly manipulative when, seconds into the Harriet vs Ruby fight,

Hold it hold it hold it.

How come you don’t mention the music in the background or the alternative to Team RWBY here? The foreboding music indicating a fight is inevitable and the alternative is Team RWBY being arrested while leaving people to do, something fundamentally against their morals?

That line is more of a confrontation Team RWBY will be offensive instead of being ‘the aggressors’ (AKA negative connotation).

... This is gonna be intensely biased in the Ace Ops favor isn’t it?

Ruby: Come on, Harriet! We’re playing right into Salem’s hands! You know we need to be working together!

A quick aside, Ruby’s voice is pitched up with this line, compared to her earlier bragging that the Ace Ops aren’t the best anymore. Her cocky smirk is replaced by a wide-eyed, fearful look, and I’d like to point out that this only happened after Harriet landed the first blow of the fight, kicking Ruby into the elevator doors. This is entirely faked, purely because Ruby’s suddenly realised that Harriet poses a threat and is trying to put on her cute ‘I’m just an innocent kid don’t hurt me’ act, while also trying to heap all the blame of this fight onto Harriet.

Her tone was also pitched up when she was talking into her school. That’s the result of raising her voice. To say nothing of how her look is PLEADING in nature, not FEARFUL.

Harriet doesn’t take any of this crap, thank the good lord, and decides to put her focus on pummelling the ever-loving aura out of Ruby.

... I really should just ignore you huh?

And boy, does she manage it. I went through and counted every single blow landed in each fight, so let’s start the blow-by-blow, literally. I’ll focus on each specific match-up one at a time, to properly break it down.

Yeah huh, sure. And Tyrian would be unbiased moderator in a debate between Ozpin and Salem right?

I’ll just keep the Ace Ops fight open in another tab so I can peer into reality.

Also, just so we’re all on the same page, I am a trained martial artist, having studied Karate (specifically Zen Do Kai), and boxing. Let’s keep this in mind as we analyse this fight.

Also keep the rest of what they’ve said in mind as well, as in ‘I have already shown an intense bias for the Ace Ops’ so you really shouldn’t be listen to.

Hits Taken Harriet: 2 Ruby: 7-8

Wanna know what isn’t counted? The amount of time or the number of times Harriet and Ruby used their semblances. Wanna know long/many times Ruby used her semblance? Five times. Two times for extended distances, once for a quick defensive deflect and two for split second dodges and maneuvers. The longest being 7 seconds. 

Harriet? Fuck, I don’t even know how to measure her because EVERY MOVE SHE MAKES is using her Semblance. She uses it CONSTANTLY. So naturally, her aura would drain faster.

Does the OP consider this?

Now, if we take into account aura levels, we are aware that Harriet’s are noticeably lowered, as seen from her fight with the Megoliath. She and Ruby are both using their semblances a lot, hard to say who’s using theirs more. Possibly Harriet, but Ruby isn’t far behind.

Fuck no, they keep it VAGUE so you don’t see how much Harriet uses her Semblance. 

I shouldn’t even consider the rest of this post considering how FLAGRENT this shit is, but we’ll move on.

Hit 2: Harriet kicks Ruby in the chest with both feet.  (Some of these screenshots are hilarious but I’m doing it as categorical proof of the hits)

Yeah, see how Harriet’s feet are ON Crescent Rose?

That’s a block. So -1 hit.

Hit 3: The next one is a little hard to count, as it’s the shot where Harriet blitzes by Ruby. The first hit is hard to tell if it connects or not, while the second hit most definitely does, meanwhile Ruby blocks the third strike. The first of these is the only hit that is ambiguous.

Yeah, it looks that way in screenshots...in animation Ruby doesn’t react correctly, meaning she wasn’t hit AT ALL. So -1 as well here too.

Hit 5: Harriet restrains Ruby’s hands behind her back, enough to cause Ruby pain. However, that is an unfortunate side-effect of having arms pinned in that manner, so I’m not going to call it excessive. After all,

Harriet: It’s not excessive if it’s necessary.

Quick fuck you: This can be said of Team RWBY fighting the Ace Ops, necessary to defeat them and try and save as much as Mantle as possible.

It’d be reductionist but that’s OP’s speciality at this point.

Hit 6: Ruby escapes Harriet’s pin, ties the bolas around Harriet, before yanking Harriet backwards into Ruby’s uppercut to the spine, which appears to go near the area of Harriet’s nape and the back of her head. (I’ll come back to this)

Yeah, that’s a pretty serious hit. Most people would suffer serious pain from that. OP even tries pointing this out as a failing of RUBY.

Yeah. That one. I study in Australia, which, had a certain event happen that leads me to be somewhat biased against punches specifically to the nape/back of head, you know, that place where your spine meets your skull? From Wikipedia, just for a basic rundown: ‘During 2013 and 2014, significant media attention was paid to two violent killings involving one-hit punches in Australia. Noting that 91 people had died in Australia in the previous fourteen years from brain trauma as a result of being so hit, a media campaign was launched to refer to them as coward punches.’

91 people. Yep.

So, if I sound like I disrespect Ruby for the single hit she landed, while Harriet seems to get a pass for punching Ruby in the back and the throw to the ground, I would like to point out first of all, Harriet only started going for attacks to the head and neck area after she had been restrained, in which case she is trying to put Ruby down hard and fast. Secondly, Ruby not only pulled Harriet backwards into the uppercut, she’s fucking grinning.

How triumphant. None of the Ace Ops show this level of glee at landing hits, I’m just saying. Also, calling back to Harriet’s line about it not being excessive if it’s necessary, Harriet was at that point restrained, only showing she is capable of fighting despite that after being punched. While hitting Harriet may not have been excessive, you would also think that perhaps a leg sweep, or a kick to the back of the knee, would be enough to stop her, instead of a King Hit, specifically one that Harriet could not have even tried to block due to how her arms are tied.

Rant about my own personal biases towards coward punches is over let’s continue the actual analysis now that I’ve copped to it

P.S. No admission of your self evident bias for the Ace Ops? yeah, not gonna buy this.

Hit 7: Harriet headbutts Ruby in the face. This one doesn’t have an impact SFX like a lot of hits do, but the way Ruby reels back makes it clear Harriet connected the blow

Notice how OP doesn’t have an image here?

Yeah, -1 again.

Hit 9: Harriet runs into Weiss’s ice wall, her aura is shattered, and she is knocked unconscious.

What isn’t shown: Harriet running head first USING HER SEMBLANCE (which makes her faster than Ruby in close quarters) into a thick ice wall.

For demonstration: run as fast you can, leaning into it, at a wall of ice. Actually don’t because people have DIED from that too. And we don’t have super quick powers in INCREASE the damage.

But how, the pray tell fuck, does Ruby apparently have enough aura to tank at least 7 hits, most of which are kicks, from a combat-trained runner, and come out smiling? Tyrian gave her a few scratches and one kick to the stomach and that had her aura flickering. Now, yes, Tyrian is on a level all his own that only Qrow and maybe Clover can match, but also; are you fucking kidding me?

Difference: Ruby used her semblance a fuckton, Tyrian is probably stronger than Harriet considering he was equal to QROW and could block bullets with his tail FROM SOUND ALONE. 

Ruby barely used her semblance in comparison to Harriet spamming the thing while the OP says she had LESS Aura.

All while taking FOUR hits, maybe 5 since OP manipulated shit.

Suddenly doesn’t seem so implausible huh?

Ruby’s a speed fighter/sniper, a DPS main, and I’m supposed to believe she’s all of a sudden more of a tank then Yang?

Because fictional characters in a world without definitive roles unlike an RPG fit neatly into all roles and not like certain circumstances gave Ruby more durability that you CONVIENENTLY ignored.

So… yeah. Take that bit as you will.

Take it as an indication you’re biased as fuck? Okay.

Anyway. Shall we move onto the next round?

You’ve sunk your creditability with that last fight and I REALLY shouldn’t listen anymore out of sheer offense at the lack of principles here, but fine,

Blake and Yang vs Elm and Vine

Hits Taken Blake: 4 Yang: 4 Vine: 3 Elm: 4

Ah huh, what is said about Semblances?

Okay, so. Elm and Vine use their semblances liberally enough, while Blake and Yang barely use their semblances outside of finishing moves. I’ll grant them all that.

...After all that with Harriet and Ruby, you don’t even BOTHER discussing the use of semblances?....

You know, they don’t even really ANALYZE the fight. Wanna know what they say beyond stating hits (NOT a good indicator of whose winning)?

And aside from the suicide bomber attack, this fight is solid enough, animation-wise at least. Elm proves herself to be an absolute goddamn beast of a woman whom I love, but… it’s a little sad that the only hits Blake makes are team attacks. Once again, even worse then it was with Bees v Adam, Yang carries the fight while Blake is near-useless, aside from a few token team attacks.

I do wish Elm was more of a tank, though. It’s what she deserves.

Honestly, this feels so INSULTING. What, you didn’t have problems so you skipped the fight effectively? Analysis doesn’t mean ‘bitching about what I don’t like’, I learned NOTHING from this. 

All I can say is-

It’s not even necessary? Anyone remember this handy lil trick Blake has?

Look at that! It’s an exploding clone that doesn’t rely on someone else to pull the pin on the bomb!

What the actual fuck was the point of this move, other then to make me worry about Blake’s mental health? Who approved this? Who said ‘what’s the ultimate show of trust? Having the former member of a terrorist group put bombs on herself that someone else detonates! Brilliant!’

This is utterly bizarre.

Just sayin’.

Blake’s clones are BLATANT when infused with Dust. Vine wouldn’t have fallen for it.

Weiss vs Marrow

Hm. Hmmm. Well. Weiss got her first solo fight win. Unfortunately,

Harriet: Marrow! Cut the crap, will you?

Marrow: I’m trying to arrest her, not kill her, Hare!

Her opponent was holding back. Looks like Weiss’s special power is still ‘losing every fight she’s in with an opponent who’s not self-sabotaging’.

Marrow: I know you Schnees are used to getting what you want. But it's time to let this one go!

Yeah, don’t buy it.

Hits taken Weiss: 0 Marrow: 1

Yep.

Weiss takes no hits, at all, while Marrow blocks and dodges every single one of Weiss’s hits aside from the last. I’m serious. So I can’t go by hits for this one, I need to go by attacks.

So you say basically nothing about the actual fight but the dodgefest you say more? Really?

Hm. Yes. Hmmm. There’s some rather, shall we say, unfortunate implications here, since this looks, to me, rather more like an execution than anything else. As pointed out to me by a friend, when I showed them these screenshots, Marrow’s posture in the last is a very submissive pose. Head down, tail drooped, arm slack, reliant on external support (his boomerang), and kneeling. Also, what is with Ruby and Weiss and going for the back of the head?

He JUST got done dealing with the Knight and had to use his Semblance to stop it. After dodging and blocking a fuckton of hits. After all of the shit with the Grimm before. For someone trying to make the Ace Ops look as innocent as possible, why would you ignore how tired he must be?

Also that isn’t an execution pose. You have to be aiming for the NECK for an execution, not the HEAD. 

There’s also the unusually heavy focus on Marrow’s tail getting burnt, and this tone-deaf line, if we’re going to point out all the ‘faunus racism’ implications that show up.

Marrow: I know you Schnees are used to getting what you want, but it’s time to let this one go.

Weiss: This is my home, and I’m not giving it up without a fight.

...

You mean like when Kefla was launching her barrage of lazers at Ultra Instinct Omen Goku and they focused on his hair just barely getting grazed? It’s to emphasize how close the attack was.

Weiss, honey, you’re from Atlas. Mantle is a separate city. Twin cities, at the most, but you’re Atlesian. Also, this came right the heck out of nowhere. Absolutely nowhere in Weiss’s arc this season were we getting anything about her giving a damn about Mantle beyond ‘I kill grimm there’.

... HER ENTIRE ARC IS ABOUT CARING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE!

And, just because unfortunate and hopefully accidental implications are the order of the day on Weiss vs Marrow, she’s saying this to the faunus that’s managed to get racism humansplained to him by the same woman who calls him ‘Wags’ as a funny nickname.

Sorry, I don’t speak wet farts.

Seriously, how the fuck is this a racism thing when Weiss is assumed to be someone who always gets her way, even in THIS Volume.

Weiss: Don't you think "tyranny's" a little dramatic?

Forest turns around to respond and looks surprised upon realizing who had just spoken.

Forest: Easy to say for a Schnee heiress, living comfortably up in Atlas.

Weiss: (sighing sadly) Not anymore.

Marrow deserves more respect than this, guys. I don’t even want to get into how bizarre it is that the final shot of his defeat puts the focus on his shackles, putting them even more in the foreground then Marrow himself. That’s just weird.

To emphasize he has them. Dumb I know but considering this post’s bullshit, you guys kind of earned it.

To conclude:

Ruby should have gotten her aura broken three hits in, sorry not sorry. Ruby is also a cold-cocking manipulative lil brat who has lost even the dregs of my respect for her. What a shame.

Which was complete horseshit beyond even Adel Aka or Dudeblade.

Harriet and Elm’s defeats seemed to have been framed in ways that were meant to be a little humiliating, with Harriet making dumb faces as she passes out and Elm landing in an awkward position. I disapprove of this. I would prefer if they were defeated with dignity.

It’s called humor.

Blake continues to be a useless damsel in distress in Actually Important Fights, while Yang is Angry All The Time and does all the heavy lifting.

That had fuck all to do with what you said, and as if being evasive and wasting enemy resources and acting as support for one of the BIGGEST HEAVY HITTERS IN THE SERIES is bad?

Weiss v Marrow has some weird implications that make me uncomfortable.

Which says more about you than anything else.

Credit where credit’s due: the voice acting, sound design, and the fight animation was great. Do I think the Ace Ops should have won? I would have found it more interesting, to be sure. Can I live with team RWBY winning? I can, but I could have done without the smugness.

Smugness you inserted.

Is there anything I would have changed? Bees vs Elm and Vine was fine, but I’d have either made it Ruby v Marrow and Weiss v Harriet (for a speedster vs Schnee fight, and a Lil Rd vs the Wolf fight), or would have let Harriet break Ruby’s aura.

Instead of personal stakes, bland ideas! Wonderful!

Also: War should and hopefully will be an Ace Ops’ song, not a team RWBY song. If anyone got betrayed here, the Ace Ops were the ones who put their trust into four liars who hid vital information and had the gall to act offended when they got told what a dick move said information-withholding was.

*insert equally shitty take about Ace Ops with bias in favor of Team RWBY here.*

Anyway, thanks for reading, I’d love to hear other thoughts on the matter. Ta, luvs.

Which is why the reblogs do nothing but regurgitate what you said while I’m blocked.

Speaking of reblogs....

https://jadekitty777.tumblr.com/post/190942492544/fight-analysis-rwby-vs-ace-ops

A lovely read dear! I’d also like to add, just because I was curious:

During the Qrow &Tyrian Vs Clover fight, I decided to do my best to count the amount of hits Clover and Qrow took.

I’m going to start with Qrow - he took about 5. One toss and 4 punches, mostly to the face (jeez Clover, I thought you liked his pretty face lol). Keep in mind Qrow is also primarily more a close-range fighter and took front lead in the Tyrian fight in the episode prior AND just went through a plane crash. The same plane crash that knocked Robyn unconscious - despite the fact she was only back-up during the other fight  and hadn’t been down in Mantle during the evacuation efforts up until the end to lure Tyrian out. The point is, his aura should be hurting, but it doesn’t even flicker.

For Clover? It added up to be about 11-12 - one of which was a point blank shotgun blast to the chest, 3-4 hits from Tyrian’s bullets in the back, and one more sword slice from Harbinger to his back.  I highlight those ones because they’d be the hardest to tank. The rest were various kicks and punches, most to his face and midsection.

(Also really Qrow,you should not be surprised Clover’s aura broke. You guys were killing him).

But the point I want to make is… Clover was down in Mantle just like the rest of the ops fighting for who knows how long before they went for Tyrian - considering they were coming back only slightly behind team RWBY and the others, we can surmise only maybe an hour or so they diverted to deal with our little scorpion. It’s also worth mentioning that ALL of our team members have been up an entire night and these fights in c12 happened closer to dawn, considering the sunrise at the episode’s end. They are all equally exhausted.

So to circle back around: Clover got struck with double to triple the hits his own team got - a full team of Atlas specialists. It feels like Clover is the only one who seems to be treated like he’s on Qrow’s level, wherein they really ALL should be at his level. Instead, it’s like the rest of the Ops had to be significantly nerfed to be beaten by Team RWBY.

If you want me to believe Team RWBY can beat them, then you also have to make me believe they can beat Qrow. And yeah, I don’t.

...

Clover never used his Semblance.

Qrow hits harder than ANYONE.

He was also attacked by Tyrian.

And Qrow was in a PLANE CRASH.

Fucking hell, this is one of the worst analysises I’ve read. Yes, including RWDE slock.

[janamelie]

LGBT+ Characters

What This Isn’t

A claim of “proof” of the sexuality and / or gender identity of any of these characters.  We don’t need that or anything else to “justify” shipping.

What This Is

A reference post to collate instances in canon which could indicate LGBT+ characters.  In the case of regulars, I won’t include every instance as it would simply take too long.

Rimmer

As I was saying… :p

Honestly, Rimmer is so obviously LGBT+ to me that I don’t know where to start.  How about his reaction to Ace in “Dimension Jump”?

RIMMER: "Commander Rimmer!" I ask you.  "Ace!" Barf city.  I bet you anything he wears women's underwear.  They're all the same, this type, you know, Hurly-burly, rough-n-tumble macho marines in public, and behind closed doors he'll be parading up and down in taffeta ballgowns, drinking mint juleps, whipping the houseboy.

KRYTEN: Sir, he's you!  It's just that your lives diverged at a certain point in time.

RIMMER: Yes, I went into the gents and he went the other way.

KRYTEN: I assume, sir, you are making fatuous references to his sexuality.  If I may point out, if --

Or how about Low Rimmer?  Surely Rob and Doug could have got their point across a little less graphically?

Or if you prefer something less rapey, this passage from “IWCD”.  Unlike the show, Rob and Doug had more time and leeway to explore the characters and this is what they chose to include for Rimmer:

“Rimmer began to regret his outburst. He didn’t like to see his other self upset, and he even contemplated briefly going up to him and giving him a manly embrace. But in a brief moment of homosexual panic, he thought his double might get the wrong idea. Not that he would, of course, because he was him and he knew for a fact he wasn’t that way sexually tilted; so obviously his double wasn’t and obviously his double would know that he wasn’t either, and it was simply a manly embrace meant in a sort of mano a mano kind of way…Perhaps he was tired…Two or three days in bed and he’d be his old self again…Who cared if his copy saw it as a sign of weakness? He’d suggest it anyway.” Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers, Grant/Naylor, pg 233.

And this from the end of the “Better Than Life” novel, when Holly - whose IQ has been restored - comes up with a way to bring Lister back from the dead (no, not as a hologram):

“Rimmer stood in the hatchway and his face yielded to a grin, which in turn gave way to laughter.  Not his normal hollow braying empty laughter, this was an altogether different noise.  This was a noise his vocal cords had never been called on to make before.

It was the laughter of joy.”

Better Than Life, Grant/Naylor, pg 218.

I know some fans read Rimmer as asexual and you can certainly make an argument for that, most obviously in “Marooned” where he describes his younger self as not “particularly highly sexed”.  Of course, that wouldn’t preclude him also being homoromantic or biromantic.

Lister

No-one’s denying Lister’s obvious attraction to and affection for women, but that doesn’t mean that he can’t be bisexual or pansexual.  In fact, his “I’m not gay!” protestations in “Duct Soup” is a fairly common way for people attracted to more than one gender to describe themselves if they don’t feel comfortable using labels.  Given that he was talking to Chloe!Kochanski to whom he’s attracted, it makes sense that he’d prevaricate like this.

And then of course, in the very next episode “Blue”, he dreams about kissing Rimmer.  It’s not only the fact of this, it’s the subsequent scene drawing a direct comparison between him missing Rimmer and Kochanski missing her Dave - her boyfriend.  And despite the ending of this episode, when Lister actually meets Rimmer again, he’s delighted.  Until he realises it’s not HIS Rimmer and even so, he gets used to nano-Rimmer and they eventually become quite chummy.

Not forgetting the chemistry between him and Ace, of course.

Kryten

I know he's a mechanoid, but no-one has any problem reading his relationship with Mechanoid - and later Blob - Camille as romantic and Camille literally says herself that both she and her husband Hector are actually androgynous, which makes Kryten - at the very least - panromantic.

And that’s before we get to his very obvious love for Lister which he states himself in “Back In The Red”.

Holly

Holly was actually conceived as a female character and became male due to Norman Lovett’s original casting.  Sources: “Stasis Leaked” by Smegazine writer Jane Killick and “The Unofficial Red Dwarf Programme Guide” by Smegazine writers Chris Howarth and Steve Lyons.

With Hattie’s replacement casting and later Norman’s return, Rob and Doug may not have intended to create a trans or genderfluid character, but that’s what they ended up doing.

Holly is also bisexual - male Holly was attracted to Hilly and female Holly to Ace.

George McIntyre

It was actually Rob and Doug’s audio commentary on the pilot version of “The End” on “The Bodysnatcher Collection” which alerted me to this possibility.  I know it’s a stretch but I’m including it precisely because I’m indifferent to George as a character and it makes no difference to me whether someone believes this one or not.

During George’s speech at his “Welcome back” party, he says “I don’t want you to think of me as someone who’s dead, more as someone who’s no longer a threat to your marriages - I think Joe knows what I’m talking about!”

We see a man and a woman laughing and the woman playfully pokes the man in the arm.  He stops laughing and looks a bit sheepish.

Rob and Doug comment confusedly to the effect of “Shouldn’t it be the other way round?  This is one of the things we had no control over at this stage.”

Come on, Rob and Doug.  Not only does this scene appear intact in the final televised version of “The End”, you also included extra background on George in “Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers”, showing the events leading up to his death.  Unlike the hologram he replaces, Frank Saunders, there is no mention of George having a wife or indeed any partner, so as far I’m concerned, we shippers can read whatever we choose into this scene.  We would regardless, but the way canon leaves it is particularly open-ended.

Deb Lister and Arlene Rimmer (“Parallel Universe”)

See previous entries.  If their male counterparts are LGBT+ then so are they, plus I always got that vibe from the performances anyway.

Camille

Yes, everyone uses female pronouns for her as that’s how she presents to the crew, but she says herself: “We’re androgynous, but I suppose you could call [Hector] my husband.”

Noel Coward Waxdroid (“Meltdown”)

Mr Coward was gay in real life and his fictional incarnation here greets Rimmer with “Delighted to meet you, dear boy!”  I rest my case.

Nirvanah Crane

And arguably the entire crew of the Holoship according to her speech: “It's a ship regulation that we all have sexual congress at least twice a day.  It's a health rule … Here it is considered the height of bad manners to refuse an offer of sexual coupling … We are holograms.  There is no risk of disease or pregnancy.  That is why in our society we only believe in sex -- constant, guilt-free sex.”

Does that sound as though they’re fussy about the genders of their partners?  It certainly doesn’t to me.  So:

Captain Hercule Platini

Commander Randy Navarro

Commander Natalina Pushkin

Commander Binks

Sam Murray

From the Series V DVD booklet:

“Briefly revived in “Holoship”, it came as a surprise that Sam was male.  In the original pilot script - and Series 1′s deleted funeral scene - deceased crew member “Sam Murray” is said to be dating “Rick Thesen”.  Possibly Red Dwarf’s first gay couple?”

Cop (“Back To Reality”)

I’m sure it wasn’t written as such and maybe he didn’t intend to, but the way Lenny Von Dohlen plays his character’s reaction to the Voter Colonel just pings my gaydar.

Frank Todhunter (“The End”)

I know the conversation in “Duct Soup” (which also includes a reference to a gay crew member nicknamed “Bent Bob” *cringe*) where Kochanski tells Lister that the Todhunter in her dimension was gay is played off as something she made up to take Lister’s mind off his claustrophobia, but she never actually says as much.  There’s nothing to say that at least part of what she was saying wasn’t true.

Ackerman (Series VIII)

In the Series VIII DVD documentary, actor Graham McTavish says he was playing Ackerman as someone who enjoys sex with women “or at a pinch, men dressed as women”.  So onto this list he goes.

Big Meat (“Only The Good”)

I don’t blame you if you’ve blocked this one out as I find the scene almost unwatchable, but he’s the big prisoner who takes to the idea of being Cat’s “bitch” unexpectedly quickly.

Katerina Bartikovsky (“Back To Earth”)

Credit to @clueingforbeggs for noticing that in “Pete Part 1” Ackerman claims to have been “having jiggy-jiggy with the Science Officer’s wife” and connecting that with Katerina being a Science Officer.  There’s nothing to say that the Joy Squid didn’t conjure up the image of an actual crew member.

But maybe the ship has more than one Science Officer?  Well, the way it’s said makes it sound as though there is only one but in “Holoship” Kryten gives Rimmer a mind patch from two officers, one of whom is Science Officer Buchan.  There is no mention of Buchan’s gender so who’s to say they aren’t also female?

Begg Chief (“Entangled”)

“We prefer the ship of green.  And the sexy light man with the lady legs so long and luscious!”

Chancellor Wednesday (“The Beginning”)

Actor Alex Hardy says in Series X DVD doc “We’re Smegged” that he was playing the relationship between his character and Dominator Zlurth with a homoerotic undercurrent and you can see it subtly in his performance.

Dolphy (“Cured”)

All I’ll say about this one is that if Messalina had behaved towards Lister as Dolphy does in this episode, nobody would have doubted that she was into him.

Ziggy (“Timewave”)

Proof that LGBT+ characters in this show work a lot better when Doug isn’t intentionally writing them as such.  Sorry.

Feel free to add any examples I may have missed.

@lord-valery-mimes  @aziraphale-lesbian   @notalwaysweak  @feline-ranger  @downonthepharm-red-dwarf  @hologrammette  @rosecathy  @cazflibs​

[letterboxd]

Murder, He Wrote.

“They say casting is 90 percent of directing and it was really true in this case.” Knives Out writer and director Rian Johnson tells us about the intricacies of whodunits, the joys of over-analyzing movies, and—yes—Star Wars.

From Hercule Poirot’s debut in an Agatha Christie novel in 1920, to the hard-boiled detectives of the 1930s, to the Pink Panther comedies, the whodunit was a perennially popular film genre—until its decline in the 1980s, when true-crime re-enactments took over. But, with Knives Out, writer/director Rian Johnson (Looper, Star Wars: The Last Jedi) is on a mission to reaffirm the whodunit’s rightful place on the big screen—and casually reinvent the form while he’s at it.

Knives Out has a gobsmacking ensemble, with Christopher Plummer (as writer Harlan Thrombey, the victim), Ana de Armas (as Marta, Thrombey’s nurse and confidant), Daniel Craig (as Benoit Blanc, the famous private detective who shows up to query Thrombey’s apparent suicide), and Lakeith Stanfield (as the investigating Lieutenant Elliott). Making up Thrombey’s extended, entitled family are Jamie Lee Curtis, Don Johnson, Chris Evans, Michael Shannon, Toni Collette, Riki Lindhome, K Callan, Katherine Langford and Jaeden Martell—all well fed by his wealth and determined to protect their piece of it.

It’s a Rian Johnson movie, so Noah Segan shows up as well, in perhaps his meatiest role yet, as a cop working with Stanfield. There’s also a delightful cameo from Frank Oz.

Rian Johnson directs Ana de Armas on the set of ‘Knives Out’.

Despite the lack of big-screen whodunits of late, there’s no shortage of audience enthusiasm for them, as evidenced by our ‘Murder Mystery’ Showdown, a great starting point for anyone looking to delve into the genre. Letterboxd members who have already seen Knives Out are very much enjoying what they see, with the film boasting a giant 4.2 average rating (at time of writing).

This is one of those films where you can just tell how much fun the cast is having, an aspect that Letterboxd member Wes nails in his review: “I’d really, really, really like to believe that Rian Johnson gathered all these actors in this giant house, hid some cameras everywhere, hit record, and none of what we saw was fictitious.”

Demi Adejuyigbe writes—in his charming Letterboxd review of the time he lunched with Johnson (!)—that the film is “absofuckinglutely phenomenal”. He marvels at how Knives Out stays one step ahead of what we expect from a whodunit: “How do you fool an audience that has come to be fooled? Johnson is so deftly able to get that joyful, wondrous reaction out of me by expertly controlling every aspect of the script and the direction in a way that makes it clear he sees the entire process as a symphony that he’s conducting, where the audience is just another instrument being played.”

Or perhaps Patrick Willems best encapsulates the joys of the film when he writes that Knives Out is “a movie as good as its sweaters (the sweaters are excellent)”. (The most popular sweater has its own story, here.)

When we got in a room with Rian Johnson recently, we naturally wanted to learn how he juggled such an impressive ensemble whilst navigating the twists, turns, and more twists of Knives Out’s plot.

Chris Evans and Ana de Armas wearing sweaters, Rian Johnson not wearing a sweater, on the set of ‘Knives Out’.

You’ve often talked about your lifelong love of the whodunit genre. How did you go about making your own? Rian Johnson: It’s very interesting, the whodunit genre. It’s one of my favorite genres. I love all the things about it. I also kind of agree with Hitchcock. Hitchcock hated the whodunit genre. To Hitchcock, the danger of the whodunit is: it’s a lot of build-up for one big surprise at the end, and that’s not very satisfying or fun. That’s why he was all about suspense. He would give the audience information early and then you’re in suspense and not just crime-solving. He would also mislead the audience, so you’d think you’re getting all the information early. And enough so that you’re leaning forward, you’re not sitting back. That’s Hitchcock’s whole deal.

So for me, what was interesting is: can I put the engine of a Hitchcock thriller in the middle of a whodunit? Have a whodunit that then turns into a Hitchcock thriller that turns back into a whodunit? That was kind of the starting point for me, from a genre-wonk point of view.

So then I started filling out, okay what would that actually mean? I’m talking around it because I don’t wanna spoil anything, but, okay if we did this and then that could be interesting. And then I started zooming in bit by bit and filling out what characters I would need for what plot points. All the details come later but it’s as ‘big picture’ as that.

Jamie Lee Curtis, Christopher Plummer, Don Johnson and Michael Shannon in ‘Knives Out’.

Were there ever any alternative outcomes in play? Not really, because I didn’t really work, like, “if this happens, then that happens, then that happens”. I worked it like a satellite map. I zoomed back. I work in little notebooks and I have to draw one line and see the entire plot along that line. So it’s not like a game of Clue where I can pick out different solutions at the end; it’s kind of set because the shape of the whole thing determines a different kind of ending from the very inception of it.

Watching this, I thought about your film The Brothers Bloom, as that’s another ode to a somewhat specific genre—the con-artist film—in which your affection for that kind of film was also evident. How challenging is it to write and shoot films in genres you grew up loving? Any time I’m attacking a genre it’s because I deeply, deeply love it. The heart of it for me is always trying to distill the thing I love about it and set that as the goal-post and then find my own way to it. Whether it’s the con-man movie with The Brothers Bloom, or Star Wars as a genre, or this, it’s always about trying to get to the heart of what I love about something and then trying to put that on the screen so the audience will have as pure an experience of it as possible. And sometimes to give the audience the purest experience, you have to shake it a little bit, because… we’ve seen so many versions of it over the years that the audience can kind of ignore it. So sometimes you have to put it in a different context, like with Brick, with film noir or something. But the intent is always to give the audience the most sharp and vivid experience of what’s at the heart of it for me.

This film is a blockbuster of chemistry. Was it difficult to cast? Once we got Daniel on board, no. Once he was the centerpiece, I think everyone wants to work with him so it was like a snowball. Because then we got Michael Shannon, and everyone wants to work with him. And Lakeith Stanfield. So, no, the cast came together very, very quickly, just like everything else in this project. With these actors, my job is easy. They show up on set, they clicked in so easily. They’re such pros. They say casting is 90 percent of directing and it was really true in this case.

Lakeith Stanfield, Noah Segan and Daniel Craig in ‘Knives Out’.

Speaking of Daniel Craig, his character is a microcosm of the film in that he is not in any way like any detective that has come before, yet you cannot help but think of precedents. Were you consciously trying to make him unlike Hercule Poirot? When I started writing, I actually kinda got myself in trouble because I was thinking too much about Poirot. I love Poirot so much and I think I was thinking too much like: how do I make my Poirot? And so I started doing all this sort of quirky stuff, and throwing all these quirks in there, like maybe he has an eye patch and a peg leg maybe. It was just silly. And so finally I said “this is so stupid”, and I pulled all that stuff and I just said: “I’m gonna write this character very straightforward. The way that he needs to be for the script. And I’m gonna give him a Southern accent, because then he’s a fish out of water in New England. And then whoever I cast, I’m gonna believe that they’re gonna inhabit that character in such a way that he’ll be unique.”

I think what Daniel found—that is exactly what is at the heart of Poirot—is Daniel found kind of what’s funny about the character. Beyond the accent. He found the self-inflated, clownish aspect of him, while still maintaining a humanity and an intelligence, which is really what Poirot is. It’s why Peter Ustinov is my favorite Poirot—he gets what’s funny about the character. And like Columbo or like Miss Marple or any of the great fictional detectives, it’s that element that makes you not quite take him seriously until it’s too late and they’ve solved the whole case. I think that’s what Daniel keyed into more than anything else.

This feels like a film that people are going to pore over the details of, as they did with Looper. I love it because that’s part of what I love about those kinds of movies. First of all, let’s separate them, because with time-travel movies, the notion that a time-travel movie can make sense is absolute nonsense. So time travel is much more like the spells in Harry Potter than science, and anyone who thinks otherwise is fooling themselves. Except maybe Shane Carruth. Shane is the one person who can actually figure out time travel. Everyone else, it’s kind of like a fantasy element more than anything else.

Ana de Armas in ‘Knives Out’.

So with Looper, I felt like I had to have it make narrative sense, but I didn’t feel the pressure of it having to work in every little detail, because it can’t. Whereas, it’s a little different with a whodunit because every screw has to be tightened and I can’t leave any loose ends. I do want people to be able to re-watch and dig in. But I’ll be a little more sad if they find things that don’t make sense. I’m sure they will, but it’ll actually make me a little sad if they do, because I’ll be like: “I messed up there”.

How do you feel about your films being subjected to that kind of scrutiny? I think it’s fun! That’s the thing: for a certain kind of moviegoer, that’s the pleasure you get—it’s almost like the kid who if you hand them a radio, you’re gonna wanna take it apart. If that’s what someone loves about watching a movie then I think that’s fantastic. I’ve done that with certain films. I’ve watched them over and over and tried to analyze, so I get [that] that’s part of the pleasure of it.

How are you feeling about your Star Wars experience? As a filmmaker, as a Star Wars lover, it was the best experience of my life. Everything about it. Writing it. Making it. The people I got to meet. The places I got to go. The experience I had putting it out. The last two years interacting with the fans has been so rewarding and so fantastic.

I feel like I always have to say that the bad part of that gets written about a lot because it’s interesting to write about. From being in the middle of the hurricane, I can tell you that 95 percent of my interactions with fans are absolutely lovely. That’s not to say they all even like the movie—some of them don’t, or some of them have issues with the film—but they’re all engaged and respectful and so deeply engaged in it in a way that when you make movies you only dream that people will engage with something that you made on that level. So no, for me, the whole thing top-to-bottom has been the most beautiful experience I can possibly imagine.

Rian Johnson directs Joonas Suotamo on the set of ‘Star Wars: The Last Jedi’.

Something that I know in my bones from being a Star Wars fan since I was five years old: everybody has a slightly different version of what Star Wars is to them, absolutely. That’s why I’m excited that stuff like [new Disney+ series] The Mandalorian can exist. The more Star Wars stuff we make, the more there’s gonna be a spectrum that gives different people the things that they want. But we also have to recognize that nothing is gonna give everybody what they want, and somebody is always gonna be upset.

What George Lucas did originally was make a movie that was straight from his heart, and expressed exactly what this world was to him. And expressed emotional truths in this world in a way that was resonant for him personally. I feel that every filmmaker who comes to Star Wars, that’s their job. Their job is not to take a survey and to see what is going to have the broadest demographic appeal. Their job is to speak from their heart and make a thing that resonates with what Star Wars is for them. And I think the more diverse filmmakers we have doing that, the more diverse Star Wars movies we’ll have, the more people will hopefully be happy and the less yelling there’ll be all around.

‘Knives Out’ is now in theaters. Comments have been edited for clarity and length. With thanks to Studiocanal.

[tzigone]

Favorite characterization of Dick Grayson

What's your favorite era or writer for Dick Grayson?  What characterizations do you like or dislike?

Here are my opinions.  I may ramble a bit. Sorry about that. 

You can skip this paragraph if you don't care how I ended up here and which comics I’ve read  - it's not particularly important, I just wanted to share.  First, while previously having seen on-screen versions of Dick Grayson, and read a bit of DickBabs fanfic (Batman: TAS sold me on them before the show went directions I loathe), I never actually read any issues of DC until 2015ish.  Had been a Marvel girl because they didn't do reboots, but then they destroyed Peter Parker's marriage and rebooted the universe, so I abandoned comics for a while.  But then I saw some reruns of Young Justice cartoon.  So I read some fic.  Many fics incorporated comic characters.  There I discovered Spoiler, who I really liked the idea of as Spoiler (someone who works against Batman's wishes and doesn't obey his orders and refused to back down, but isn’t a killer).  So I read the Robin series for the first 100+ issues (quitting when I knew War Games was near because the storyline sounded bad).  But that made me decide to read the Nightwing comic that stared in that era.  Really liked that, and really liked Dick Grayson (on-screen portrayals had already lead me to favor him).  Then Birds of Prey, Dixon-era, too.  Then, because I liked Dick, the Original and New Teen Titans. Original was too Silver Age for me, but really enjoyed 1980-1986ish New Teen Titans (thought it went downhill after that, and abandoned when I reached 1990 issues).  Also read assorted Golden, Silver, and Bronze Age comics.  So I have relatively broad, but very shallow knowledge of most Bat-eras, with more in-depth knowledge of the '90s and much less of post-2000 (mostly fic, which isn't always representative of the comic).

While I have opinions on various Bat and non-Bat characters and storylines, I'm starting with Dick here. He was my favorite. It's so dependent on writing (as is ever character), and right now he’s Ric, and that is something I’m not interested in. 

While I absolutely like aspects from other eras, and I dislike some aspects from these eras, my favorite time periods for Dick are probably 1980-1986ish and 1996-2000.  There’s some good 70s stuff and I like certain dynamics of him as guardian/mentor to Damian (and some stuff with other family), but as whole, these two eras in his titles (Teen Titans and Nightwing) are my favorites.  For his characterization as stand-alone (rather than his relationships with other characters).

Golden and silver age Dick merit a bit less discussion. Characters weren’t as distinct from each other back then.  Nor, really, as consistent.  But Dick was sometimes regarded as quite a mature young man in the golden age.  Responsible, good grades, intelligent, etc.  But so was Speedy - like I said, not much distinction.  Despite some impressions, in the stories I read I did not notice Robin to make lots of puns or be unusually cheery and smiley.

Come to the mid-60s and Dick was so much a teenager. I mean the original Teen Titans fairly scream with it early on (so much slang, really folks). One writer I didn’t like had him behave like an idiot (I’m not the only one who thought so, judging by the letters pages, though opinions were split).  Really, though, in the early original Teen Titans it felt like writer(s) were trying to push the “teen” thing too much, and they sometimes came off like caricatures.  But it was a time in comics when stories and characterizations were shifting and there were, IMO, both failures and successes in trying to embrace new and different.

The ‘70s were okay. Some bits I liked, and some I didn‘t. Dick is usually responsible in Detective Comics stories. He did a little bit of playing the play-boy (with Silver), which isn’t my speed, since I like the idea that Dick, unlike Bruce, doesn’t put on a facade in day-to-day life.  Had a few girlfriends - very normal and not either stunningly celibate or shockingly promiscuous. Though the entire 70s was one year of college for Dick.

I am not at all fond of the "goofy" Dick that seems to have popped up fairly often in the past 20 years.  They often seemed to have seriously dampened his brainpower and detective skills (because Tim is the smart one and the detective and for some reason they can’t both be that).  I’m not a fan of separate out all Batman’s skills and assigning one to each Robin. It makes the Robins all less than Batman and inferior to him and sets that they will never be his equals and that I do not agree with. Now this is by no means a *consistent* thing, but it does happen, and it does irritate me.  I don’t like seeing characters diminished.

I really love old-school Dick.  Back when he was young (late '70s to mid '80s), they showed us how mature he was (probably to contrast his youth and make him a viable peer to older heroes).  Both Wally and Roy commented on it. Roy said how he always felt so much younger (issue where he got custody of Lian).  Wally though Dick was always on top of things (Kory and Donna knew better).  Heck, Terry's (Donna's ex) bachelor party was another fine example how much more of an adult he was than some men twice his age.  He was pretty cerebral, a fantastic detective, a good fighter, etc.  He could hang out and have fun, too, of course. He wasn't a stick-in-the-mud.  He was too closed off and unwilling to talk sometimes (moreso with his team, and perhaps because he thought he needed to project confidence as a leader?).  He was, in a reverse, quite willing to talk about other people's emotional issues.   Sometimes as a friend, and sometimes as a leader.  He behaved most immaturely when dealing with Batman, particularly as their relationship became more difficult - there were times when they brought out the worst in each other. Though it wasn't steady, of course.

We really got to see Dick as a leader in this era. Someone people respected and looked up to.  Not that his team always agreed with him or that he was always right, but that but that he was a person that people did have trust in. And that he usually did a good job of deserving it.  It’s not just other teenagers, though, but the older heroes respect him as well.  It’s also the first time we a real, substantive romance - with Kory.  Saw where he floundered and how he loved, and such.  Which I thought worked well until it reached a point where I thought it needed to end, and it didn’t (or rather it did end, but didn’t stay ended).  Readers who like the ship, though, will likely have a different perspective, if they are like me (I just blame the writing when this sort of thing happens with ships I prefer).

Batman: Year Three - not the best story.  I don't remember most of it, to be honest.  But one thing I really liked was the highlighted difference between Bruce and Dick.  It hits that Dick is more emotionally healthy than Bruce. That Dick had the emotional support Bruce lacked as a child (I don't think continuity had yet settled on the idea of Alfred as a father-figure to Bruce).  That could segue me into changes in Bruce's backstory and characterization, but I'll refrain.  I will say that I preferred Dick with the nice-nuns orphanage to Dick-in-juvenile-facility (though I really, really like Dixon's run on Nightwing).  It makes Bruce less of a "rescuer" of Dick, which I prefer. I do not like the idea that Dick was doomed to end up dead on street (or a criminal) if not for Bruce.  Though I admit to preferring old-school Dick-goes-directly-to-Bruce's-home, no matter how unrealistic.  I dislike the entire Talon thing even more. I hate the back-projecting of more angst and more terrible things, like his parents being murdered wasn't bad enough.

Now we come to Nightwing series. I  really liked Dixon's run.  I'm a DickBabs fan, so seeing them get together was great.  I did read he wanted Dick/Donna, and I'm glad that didn't happen.  Partially because I'm a DickBabs fan, but also because I really, really liked the platonic friendship between Dick and Donna during the New Titans.  And I liked that it was platonic and that a friendship - rather than romance - could be so very important.  I don't think friendships get near the credit they should as important relationships in fiction, and so often fans want them to be romantic.  And the older I get, the more I value good fictional friendships and sibling relationships and so on.  For the record, I also really liked the Vic/Gar friendship. And I still tend to think of Donna, rather than Wally as Dick's BFF. Though he has many friends.

Anyway, I really liked seeing Dick working on his own and having his own city.   He was finding his own path and his rogues were being developed. I liked the idea of him as a cop, and I enjoyed Amy. I liked a lot of his banter with Barbara. But not just the banter, the serious stuff. Dick was looking for a real, long-term, serious relationship.  And Barbara was the hesitant one - for understandable reasons.   It's an everyday reminder of the things they used to do together.  Things he can do that she no longer can.  And she really wants to.

Of course, in this era, he was totally a big brother to Tim, a relationship he never really had with Jason (post-crisis).  Now, Bruce's character was becoming worse and worse in this era, so that provided some conflict for Dick.  Early in the series, Bruce wasn't that bad yet, and he and Dick had some nice bonding/reconciling moments.  And so some of the issues were just on Dick's side.  He has, since at least the Titans days, had a persistent need to prove himself Batman's equal.  To others and to Batman. I was kinda peeved with Donna when she said he'd never be as good. He thinks Bruce thinks less of him on occasions when Bruce doesn't. But Bruce still treats him like an underling a good portion of the time.  He expects Dick to take orders with no questions and doesn't give him full details of plans and doesn't listen to his opinions or consider Dick's needs.  Way too often, Bruce just puts his goal ahead of everyone else.  That's an issue with Bruce.  But Dick feels like it's Bruce not seeing him as equal.  Which it is, IMO, but mostly in the sense that Bruce tends to put himself/his goal above all others in terms of importance (a problem that has only gotten worse with time).

I wasn't real fond back-projection/retconning of the Dick/Babs relationship over the years. Or her de-aging.  I like her at least 4 years older than Dick.  With no involvement when he was in highschool.  Flirtation when he was in college (1970s Batman family issues), sure, but nothing really happening until he's in Bludhaven and in his mid 20s and the 5-7 year age gap doesn't matter because they're both adults.  I much prefer her pre-crisis background with Batman to the post-crisis one, but that's a topic for my post on her.

Then the Devin Grayson era - I don't agree with all the positions of the author, but I do agree about Devin Grayson: http://theflyingwonder.tumblr.com/post/107703923021/you-made-me-curious-and-i-couldnt-resist-it-tell and I think way too many of her aspects stuck with the character.  Which I guess makes her a success, but doesn't work for me at all, because I don't like the character she describes at all and he is not Dick to me. I've read her interview on Dick Grayson and her perception of the character was just nothing like mine. She acts like he's not a thinker (even though got called too cerebral in the old days).  She acts like Dick either "fights or fucks" everyone he meets, and totally disregards so many other types of relationships. Now, the Mirage-rape had already happened (and was horribly handled), plus the Raven-mind-controllish thing (also didn't work for me), but Grayson made Dick the sleeps-around type.  That was specifically contradictory to earlier characterizations where Dick was the committed-relationship type - something he actually discussed with Roy at one point.  I liked Dick being a relationship-only guy, it was a big contrast with Bruce (particularly post-Crisis Bruce).  I don't like Dick being Batman-lite at all.  

Not Devin Grayson, but Nightwing Annual #2 - ghastly. So incredibly out of character for who Dick was back then.   Another not-my-review at http://theflyingwonder.tumblr.com/post/93534635531/can-you-explain-the-nightwing-annual-2-thing. Though I would go further in that it's  reason I don't like post-Kory’s-political-wedding Dick/Kory.  It felt like a lot of build up to "love isn't enough" and then he basically chunked his beliefs to stay with her, which makes the relationship a bad thing to me. Here's my less-well-worded thoughts when I read the wedding. http://tzigone.tumblr.com/post/170389768364/nightwing-and-starfire

So, Dick's life in Bludhaven was destroyed.  His life as independent hero was destroyed.  I enjoyed Dick with the Titans, but him in Gotham is a no-go to me.  Because he goes back to being an appendage of Bruce.  He's working in someone else's city, he's a subordinate (at least with Bruce is actually there).

I haven't read as much of the Dick/Damian relationship as I maybe should have.  While interested in their dynamic, I'm not keen on Dick's wider characterization.  I do not like lothario-Dick.  And I do not like Batman-lite Dick.  So I deeply disliked him taking Robin from Tim and giving it away without discussing it, just like Bruce did to him.   Yeah.  To top that off, I unlike many, did not like the first 12 issues of Red Robin, so there wasn't even pay-off.  And then later we'd get Dick faking his death and hurting his family for the sake of the mission (Batman's mission).  Too Batman-like. I do get incredibly frustrated with that no matter how badly he treats them, Bruce's "kids" keep coming back and following his orders.  I didn't like his non-masked storyline, in N52, either. Sadly, at least Barbara (who I don’t like being a student of Bruce’s), Dick, and Tim have all adopted some of Bruce’s worse traits in regards to secrets and manipulation at one point or another.

But my biggest thing is that Dick all to often (not always, but even once is too often) gets treated like a joke. He's the lovable brother, and that part is okay. But he's all cuddles and cartoons and Disney and most of his maturity is just gone.  This is heavy in fic, but it's present in the comics, too.  At 19 he was man, and now he's a man-child. Not when he's working, I mean, but in personal life.  Lex Luthor says he's not a big thinker and some people agree. And that is just totally wrong to me.  For me Dick, while far from perfect, is a person that has earned and has respect not only from his peers, but from the first-generation heroes.  And it just gets worse later.  Late Pre-Crisis they de-age him and he's 21 in N52 (when it starts anyway). And I hated his de-aging, and Barbara's.  It feels like they're being drug backwards and not allowed to grow up. Even though Barbara *started* grown up and Dick had pretty much been a man even during his endless year at Hudson.  I don't like the idea of Dick as someone people don't take seriously. Bart or Booster, maybe is someone villains don't take seriously, but should. But Dick, at least as he reaches his adult years, should be someone that people (villains and colleagues) do take seriously and respect.  Thought without the intimidation Batman has, at least with criminals.  I will say I do think it was done partially to keep Batman from getting too old to do the job, but I still don’t care for it.

Don’t get me started on Dick and what he thought was Bruce’s body and the Lazarus pit.

I thought the entire issue with Dick and Bruce after Bruce’s failed wedding was bad.  Dick tries to be the goofball. They try to redeem it at the end, but it falls flat because he was stupid enough to think it would help in the first place.

Some people seem to think it's the sweetest thing ever if Dick moves back to Gotham and lives in the manor and Bruce takes care of him, and that's just a no-go to me.  It's infantilizing. He's grown up and should be allowed to grow up.  I see a lot of infantilizing of Dick, Jason, Tim and Damian.  I get why it's done (to see Bruce the dad), but dislike it intensely.  It's demeaning to me. I like Bruce the dad, too. But he can be a dad to adult children and treat them like adults (well, the grown ones). And yes, like equals, but that it what I think the relationship between adult parents and children should be.  Though it’ll be a long time before Bruce gets to a point where he’ll consistently do that.

Side note: the comments on Dick's body get a little old.  I totally get that he's stunning.  I'm cool with Kory or Barbara or his current girlfriend enjoying his body or complimenting him on it.  But sometimes it seems like various characters (usually female) are discussing him like a piece of meat. Particularly frustrating when his hero colleagues do so.  I know a good bit of this comes with me binge-reading, making it seem more often than when issues are read a month apart.

[allourheroes]

Reasons I’m Bitter: Almost Human Edition

It’s been over four years since Almost Human was canceled after one season. In looking it up today to remind my generally science fiction-hating sister who also loved it (as did my entire family—which usually only happens with sitcoms) that it’s gone, I found an article about “terrible shows” that Fox canceled. I admit, outwardly it does just seem like a buddy cop drama with a twist, but even if that was all it offered, have we as an audience actually tired of the trope?

This time, we got human cops who must be paired with android partners. How is that not a fun twist on the buddy cop genre?

Anyway, here are just a few reasons in no particular order why I’m still bitter (some of them are for the Great Shipping™, just so you’re forewarned):

Karl Urban and Michael Ealy were fantastic together! Amazing chemistry!

Subverted the human and robot dynamics (super soft android who is great with kids and wants to talk about issues while the human is closed off and wants to pretend feelings don’t exist)

The specific android that Dorian (Ealy) plays is a type that has been replaced in the police department and because they’re “too emotional” so now most cops have these boring nobody unfeeling androids instead

Cute silly moments like them singing Elton John’s “Bennie and the Jets” together

Emmy-nominated special effects (You read that correctly: Amazing top-notch special effects on a non-premium science fiction television show. It was a fucking gift.)

Fox aired the episodes out of order so it was confusing to watch when it aired and therefore harder for the audience to follow (just like they did for Firefly, etc.)

The ethical dilemmas of the future (including sex bots, genetically-engineered children, etc.)

Strong female police captain who is not all hard edges but actually sweet and considerate as well

Good cast in general

Rudy! Played by the guy from Pirates of the Caribbean who has the fake eye/some dude in Game of Thrones. He’s a techie who loves the androids and is cute with Dorian and gives us nice comic relief. (I love him, even if he is a little bit pervy.)

An actual quote from a scene in “Are You Receiving?” (what a title):

KENNEX (Human, Karl Urban): Hold this. And this.

DORIAN (Android, Michael Ealy): What am I doing here?

KENNEX: You're heating my coffee. Hey! I like it hot.

DORIAN: It's best between 155 and 175 degrees, most people prefer it at 175. You like it at 165, and that's what it is.

KENNEX: You know how I like my coffee?

DORIAN: Yes, I, unlike you, pay attention to details, like what time it is and what time you're supposed to pick up your partner for shift.

KENNEX: Oh, I pay attention to details, like you just put your finger in my coffee.

DORIAN: If you'd like, I could put it somewhere else.

(!!! A fucking fingering joke? Are you kidding me? I could die.)

Things Dorian the android is confirmed to have:

A “synthetic soul” (ROBOT WITH A SOUL)

A dick (ROBOT WITH CONFIRMED GENITALS) (The replacement cop robots do not have dicks, just FYI.)

There was just generally a lot of cool future stuff and the plot was good and the characters and their relationships develop nicely (if you watch in the correct order) and it left off with a cliffhanger about Dorian’s creator and what was on the other side of the wall and now we’ll never know and I’m angry

Also, it had a lot of inspiration from Blade Runner but it was modern-futuristic with way more POC

Oh yeah, the human cop lost his leg and has PTSD and has an electronic android leg that he has trouble dealing with

Dorian tells him to lube himself up with olive oil to help. And then later comments when he knows John did (*Martha Stewart voice* It’s a good thing)

It was just fucking cool

All in all, it was fantastic and, to be honest, we probably didn’t deserve it since I remember literally seeing people comment at the time that it was too unbelievable for Dorian to have trouble being accepted because he’s a robot when the bigger issue is that he’s black. Like, yikes. Humans are terrible.

Anyway, if you want to legally experience this treasure, it’s available for purchase on Amazon (DVD or digital), but the episodes are still out of order, so check here for the correction (through the production order numbers). Or just, like, illegally download it or stream it because it probably makes no difference at this point. :(

(I have some far-fetched hope that somehow this will get renewed by someone else still, but I know the likelihood is probably less than zero percent. So, like, just suffer with me.)

Thanks for reading my long rant. The end.

[emilyplaysotome]

Chapter 5 - From Good to Bad

Catch up on Chapter 1 - 4 here! (or just Chapter 4)

A leopard cannot change his spots and it would seem that Soryu Oh was destined to be on the wrong side of the law.

There was no ski mask, no hiding of features - just the man I’d known for some time looming over me in a similar fashion to how he’d once stood over me in his suite, as I cowered beneath him on a couch back at the fictional Tres Spades. His hair was slicked back and I found myself frozen beneath him, unclear as to why he was resorting to petty thievery.

“Hurry the fuck up!” He yelled as the train began to slow into Queensboro plaza.

“Ok…ok…I’m just going to reach for my wallet…”

Soryu’s eyes darted and he clicked his tongue in an irritated fashion.

“Shit!”

I held my wallet out to no one as I caught his back running towards an adjacent car. In my own, two NYPD officers barreled through the doors at the opposite end and began to chase him. It all happened so quickly that I barely could process what had transpired, but as the train pulled into the station I realized that the doors refused to open. After a short commotion in the empty train car next door, I watched as the subway finally allowed people on and off, and Soryu was escorted out in handcuffs by a plain clothed officer.

“Are you ok miss?” asked an African American cop. He stood at least 6 feet tall and peered down at me with a concerned expression.

“Yes. I’m fine.”

He handed me his card and I took it.

Terek Bishop was a detective at the NYPD. He was quite striking, with handsome features, short cropped hair and a clean-shaven face. He was the type of officer that broke the pot belly, doughnut eating stereotype and instead had the body of pro athlete with an intellectual sharpness that comes with outsmarting criminals on a daily basis.

He told me that the man who had moments ago held me up had been terrorizing the trains at night and made me sit on the platform at Queensboro Plaza as he took an official statement from me. After a good 15 minutes of talking, he finished his report and noted that I would most likely be called in as a witness against Soryu.

It never crossed his mind that I knew the man who had momentarily forgotten about me or his past life in this world. I was happy that Soryu had been apprehended yet if he was to end up in jail I had absolutely no clue as to how exactly I’d get that kiss. It was unlikely that I’d be able to meet Soryu through a dating app considering he was a criminal and seeing as how I had no idea insofar as how one schedules a conjugal visit, I could feel the king laughing at me from his invisible vantage point.

My face flushed as Terek took down my information and my mind started to run away with itself. Luckily he didn’t seem to notice and instead noted that someone from his unit would get in touch.

“Sorry for keeping you out so late ma’am,” he said politely and I found myself stopping him with the realization that Soryu wasn’t the only one Terek might be able to help me locate.

“You don’t happen to work with a Jin Namba?” I asked cautiously. “I think he’s NYPD as well…”

Terek shook his head with a smile and said, “We’re a large organization ma’am. Name sounds familiar but I don’t think I know him. You a friend of his?”

“Something like that.”

“You could call the main switchboard but that’s about the best I can do for you.”

“The switchboard?”

“Yeah, hold on. Hey Fuller?”

Terek spoke into his walky and I heard a static-y type of sound before the man on the other end of the line provided me with a phone number. Terek told me I could give it a call and be put in touch with an officer, should Jin Namba be NYPD.

I thanked him, well aware of the fact that I didn’t know if the king had left Jin’s profession intact or if he’d turned him into something else entirely. Coupled with the fact that even if he was still NYPD, I couldn’t just call him on a professional line and ask him out on a date.

Regardless though, these were questions best handled after a good night sleep and being keenly aware that the clock was nearing 1 am on a work night, I needed to get to Meg’s and get myself to bed.

The next day I rolled in to the office overtired and with a latte the size of my head.

For the most part being a manager meant not being subjected to the same sort of scrutiny when it came to arrival and departure times at work. However, maintaining an atmosphere built on “fairness” meant that I upheld the expectations set for my underlings. I wanted to roll in late but instead I dragged my haggard ass outta bed and was in my office by 9:30 knowing full well that I was an example for the junior employees that tended to go out more often than I did these days.

I had hoped to get through the morning with as little human interaction as possible, but as luck would have it Anita decided to pay me a visit around 10 AM. She was one of my few real friends at the office, seeing as how we were both senior level people and often found ourselves stuck on different iterations of “manager island”. She was an executive creative director, and with a twinkle in her eye she plopped herself down and announced that they were pitching for a new account.

“Do you remember when we did all that work for Marriott?”

“Vaguely - why do you ask?”

“A much, much sexier hospitality brand is coming down the pike for a pitch in a month and I’m looking for all those consumer testimonials you did.”

“Hmm.”

I could feel my metaphorical feet dragging as I waded through my old files and Anita knew me well enough to smirk and ask, “What did you get up to last night?”

“Oh, not much.”

“That’s not what this seems like…”

“I had a date if you must know.”

“A date?” She asked with a perplexed expression, “but wait…you and…”

It was then that I’d realized I’d messed up. I hadn’t really wanted to talk about our breakup seeing as how I wanted to believe I’d get the opportunity to see him again and figure out my feelings once and for all. As stressful as this new game was, I hoped that it would allow me to solidify what I wanted and get it but I hadn’t really wanted to broadcast the journey to those in my real life.

“Please, keep it on the DL,” I said. “I’m still hoping we’ll get back together.”

“So you went out with him?”

“Not exactly…”

“Noami…I’m not judging, just confused.”

“It’s a long story that I don’t feel like getting into,” I said quickly. “And I found the presentation. Should I slack it to you?”

Anita nodded and said, “Thanks. And if you ever want to talk I’m here. I won’t push, just saying.”

“I appreciate that.”

Anita left and I found myself thinking about Meg’s return and the fact that I was mostly on my own. I spent a good portion of the day trying to figure out how I could loosely explain my dilemma to friends, but other than Leon I had a hard time believing anyone in this world could comprehend what had happened to me during my time down the otome rabbit hole. I found myself thinking of those last few days when all I wanted was my New York friends to offer their advice and support on what man I should take back to this world, yet now that I was home I had no way of leaning on them.

I trudged through as much work as I could handle and around 4 pm decided that I was mentally done for the day. Luckily for me, that meant laying low in my office having no pending meetings and most of my department busy with their assigned work.

As I once had in an otome cafe, I pulled out a new notebook and wrote the names of the men I was looking for in order to help get some sense of organization or a plan. I’d fallen into a date with Hiroshi, but having met Soryu once more realized that I couldn’t just keep swiping and hope to run into these men. I’d need to be slightly proactive and hope that the king had preserved some of their defining characteristics considering there were traces of the men they had been in both Soryu and Hiroshi.

At the moment I figured outside of waiting for my park date with Hiroshi on Saturday, I could follow up with Terek and feign some story of wanting to look Soryu in the eyes and confront the man who had accosted me on the train. For Jin, I could call the NYPD switchboard and confirm whether or not he was an employee. If he was, I’d have to concoct a story to meet up with him and if he wasn’t I’d cross that bridge when I got there. Hijikata and Zyglavis’ whereabouts remained a complete mystery at the moment and I jotted down a few clues and interests ranging from martial arts to chocolate cake.

Taking into account the size of New York City, the exercise felt far more futile than it had back in otome-ville where I’d had the upper hand. Even though you’d think I’d have the home game advantage considering we were in New York, the vastness of the city left me feeling like I was attempting to locate a bunch of golden needles in a dirty, rat infested haystack.

With these men I’d have to cross my fingers and hope we’d cross paths on an app, while researching hot new spots that may have opened up and attracted them.

Then, there was the last man that the king summoned who at the moment remained a total mystery. When he had noted this fact I initially thought the man in question might be Shunichiro Tachibana and I’d be lying if my heart hadn’t been hopeful of this fact. Zyglavis never knew, but I continued to play Shun’s routes from time to time seeing as how Irresistible Mistakes never had the issues that the other games had upon my return to this world. However, as I mustered up the courage to launch the game with the hope that Shun’s route would be mysteriously unavailable, I couldn’t help but think that was far too easy considering how duplicitous the king was…

…and when Shun’s route loaded without issue, I could feel my heart sink.

If I was being honest (and somehow the king’s games always forced me to take a long, hard look in the mirror), Shun and Hijikata were always the two that I questioned saying goodbye to. With Hijikata, I didn’t have a choice to explore where that relationship could leave as I was taken back to the future before it could unfold. Shun, on the other hand, was someone who had always matched well with me on paper and it was nothing more than a fleeting gut feeling that made me leave him behind.

It may sound ridiculous, but I was jealous of his MC whenever I’d read his stories and as a result, that emotion that bubbled up made me question why it was that I had deemed him not my match. He really would have been the most perfect boyfriend, and having played more and more of his routes I realized that I’d gone with someone I had more information about over someone I was getting to know. His dismissal haunted me more and more as Zyglavis and I had a harder time being together and I often wondered how he would have handled his jealousy.

Now it was clear to me that we would not be getting a second chance to find out, and despite being at work that realization did not prevent tears from welling up in my eyes. I was happy that most of the office had headed home, but there were enough of my employees left that I attempted to compose myself as I hid behind my monitor.

By the time I’d finally composed myself, I was in an empty office and had little choice but to go back to Meg’s and pack in anticipation of returning home this weekend. She was set to return tomorrow evening and we discussed having dinner together before I went back to my empty studio on the Upper East Side.

I was surprised at how hard I was taking the news that Shun was most likely not the mystery man brought here from the otome world, and convinced that I needed to cheer up pushed myself to recover with a yummy dinner and marathon of Vanderpump Rules. Naturally, it’s the moments of feigned positivity when the universe decides to throw another gut punch and though one could argue it was my fault for having my attention on my phone instead of the street in front of me I accidentally careened into a beautiful woman.

I didn’t mean for her to topple over in such a dramatic fashion, but she looked up at me stunned with large doe-like eyes as her long legs were sprawled out on the pavement. Before I could off her an apology or my hand for that matter, a familiar man flew out of the restaurant she’d been waiting in front of and rushed up to her.

“Are you ok?” He asked.

“I think so.”

“Someone could have gotten hurt as a result of your carelessness!” he chided, confirming my suspicions and adding to what was already proving to be a downer of a day.

Zyglavis’ not only had a girlfriend, but she appeared to be everything that I was not.

Read Chapter 6

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[scripttorture]

I once read something about this kid who’s dad worked in the Italian Mafia and they mentioned eating and the men going down to the basement to beat someone. I mostly hear about torture conducted by the government or police. Would something conducted by the Italian Mafia still fall under torture depending on what they do? If they had a torturer group, how would other characters react since they wouldn’t be like a good cop or supervisor, but another criminal?

(Part 2 of mafia question) Also, could I use a torturer group to point out structural flaws in my fictional organization?

 That first question is actually something I’m having to double check atthe moment because the law has changed/is changing in some places.

 Some countries are moving towards counting abuse by internationalcriminal organisations as torture. Some countries still legally define tortureas an abuse conducted by either government employees (soldiers, policeofficers, etc) or armed groups thatcontrol territory. It really depends on where exactly your story is set.

 Generally torture is legally defined more by who does it than what they do. To meet the legal criteria fortorture something has to be-

Painful (mentally or     physically)

Deliberately inflicted with     the intent to cause pain

Done for some kind of reason     (ie punishment, to terrorise, to try and extract a confession)

Done by either a representative of a government or a group that controls territory

 Some countries count certain organised crimes groups in the lastcategory and therefore their activities legally count as torture. The keything, regardless of country, is that this is abuse done on behalf of a largergroup by a group member. It isn’tdone by a private individual.

 Without knowing where exactly your story is set I can’t research whatwould and wouldn’t count for your story. And….I’m not a lawyer so I may not bethe best person to research that for a specific country anyway.

 You could try to look up the answer for the country you have in mind.You could also try treating the case as something huge in your story, somethingthat leads people to start debating the law. In a fictional country (or indeedjust fiction) you could just make a narrative choice about whether or not thislegally ‘counts’ in your setting.

 I will say that you couldeasily make an argument that the Mafia controls vast swathes of southern Italy.

 I’m not entirely sure what you mean with your second question. I’minterpreting it as asking how other criminals within this organised crime groupmight treat and react to the torturers.

 That’s not something I have any research on, so my answer is based on acombination of anecdotal accounts from soldiers and my own instinct/generalknowledge.

 I think that responses would vary pretty widely depending on theindividual. Even within violent groups individuals often have a sense of…Ihesitate to call it ‘morality’ but everyone has a sense of what is ‘too far’,what is acceptable and what isn’t.

 It seems unlikely that members of the Mafia would be well versed inresearch on torture and its effects.

 But I think it would be perfectly realistic for a number of yourcharacters to be more or less against it anyway. This could be based on‘practical’ considerations, such as it bringing more police or political attentionto the group, being hard or unpleasant to clean up, difficulty holding victimsfor days without discovery and so on.

 It could also be based on personal dislike for the torturers. Torturersdo tend to come across as prettyarrogant and self-important. That’s part of the toxic, hyper-masculinesubculture they tend to build. A sort of chest-thumping bravado that has themseeing themselves as the biggest, baddest, most important person in the room.

 That could easily aggravate other characters, especially if they seethemselves as doing all the ‘real work’ of actually bringing money in.

 And I think you could still reasonably have one or two people objectingto specific incidents as going ‘too far’. Or individuals who just think it isn’tparticularly useful. Someone outside the torturer sub-group might have a moreclear-eyed idea of how much useful information they’re getting from torture, ienone.

 It’s worth noting here that I’m not convinced torture in organised crimehappens in the same way as torture in the military. In military organisationsyou tend to see sub-groups of torturers within larger organisation, made up ofindividuals who spend the majority of their time torturing rather than doinganything else.

 The impression I get of organised crime (and it is just an impression because I haven’t found any specific researchyet) is that there are a lot of individuals who occasionally torture ratherthan specific torturers who spend the majority of their time torturing. Thatmakes a difference. It could mean that working from the military as a model isentirely wrong and that torture within organised crime groups functions in adifferent way, with different patterns and sub-cultures.

 I’m going to keep going with the assumption it functions inmilitary-like ways because that’s the best/only pattern I can work from at themoment.

 With that in mind- yes I think you really could use torture to highlightthe flaws in this organisation’s structure.

 Torturers tend to cause fragmentation in the groups they’re in. I thinkthe types of issues I’ve discussed in regards to…why other criminal charactersmight not get on with torturers should give you a little bit of an idea whythat happens.

 Torturers essentially don’t function well in communities. Some of thatis due to the mental health problems torture causes in torturers. But a lot ofit is also due to the way torturers seem to…form cliques.

 They form sub-cultures/sub-groups within larger organisations. And thetoxic hyper-masculine culture they develop in those groups is….not conducive tocooperation with other people.

 They’re very competitive, extremely violent and well- the kind of macho,individual ‘competition’ for an imagined ‘alpha’ position they tend to engagein means they tend not to listen to orders. That’s not just in the area oftorture particularly. They disobey orders. Their discipline is atrocious. Theyargue with their superiors.

 They create an awful working environment by antagonising theircolleagues, undermining discipline (and hence fracturing the group) and eggingeach other on to worse and worse behaviour.

 If there are weak points in this organisation, old resentments,rivalries, the chances are torturers will bring that out. They might not do itdirectly, but by worsening the group environment and sowing distrust-essentially all of these characters are going to end up more stressed than theywould be otherwise, leading to shorter tempers and more frequent arguments.

 You might already have some ideas in mind for how your torturers couldbe used to emphasise the organisation’s flaws. I’m going to make a fewsuggestions just in case though. :)

 I think the way they undermine the chain of commandis a good thing to use. Arguing with superiors, outright disobeying them (andthen perhaps blaming it on others) or just complaining about the people incharge could all be used to show rivalries ramping up in the group and/or afracturing between ‘loyal’ and ‘disloyal’ characters. As a side note torturersseem to love complaining about how they’d get so much more done if they justhad less over sight. So I think using just gossip and rumours coming out ofthese complaints would be very true to life.

 Highlighting the ways torturers tend to lose otherskills could also work as a fracture between them and the larger group. Asignificant part of the group might start seeing them as a drain on resourcesthat gives the group nothing as torturers demand more resources and morespecial treatment without really doing anything the rest of the Mafia couldn’t.A prominent example of torture failing (failure to get information or a kidnapvictim who was supposed to be kept alive dying for instance) could be used as aflash point.

 And I think I’m going to leave that there. I hopethis helps. :)

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