#the dickhead

[silly-inky]

Hazbin Hotel Characters Ages

TW: mention of death, drugs, alcohol, guns

So I got bored and wondered about the ages of some of the Hazbin Hotel characters, so here is the information I gathered, this also includes their theorised causes of death as well

Just be aware that some of this information may not be the most accurate so if I get something wrong do forgive me

Anyways

Charlie is in her 200’s, she doesn’t exactly look it, but she is immortal and her parents haven’t exactly aged much either, so she appears to be in her 20’s

Angel Dust died in his mid 30’s in 1947 from a drug overdose, he is the only one (apart from Baxter) who has a confirmed cause of death

so that would put him currently in his 110’s

Husk died at 75 in the 1970’s his death is not confirmed but is theorised to be from alcohol poisoning/ some other alcohol related incident, or he possibly could of took his own life

That would put him currently in his 120’s

(that would mean he would be, at the oldest, 52 when angel dust died)

Vaggie died in her 20’s in 2014, she does not have a confirmed cause of death, the theories I have heard about her death may not fit well now that we are aware she originally ended up in Heaven

So that currently puts her in her 30’s

Niffty died at 22 in the 1950’s, she does not have a confirmed cause of death, but some theorise it was either from being shot, falling down a chimney/ into a fireplace or being caught in a house fire

Which puts her currently in her late 90’s to early 100’s

Alastor died in his 30’s-40’s in 1933, his cause of death was a dog related incident, it is theorised he was shot and killed in a hunting accident (Alastor was either hiding a body, or was out hunting himself, when another hunter’s dog(s) was alerted to Alastor’s presence and started barking at him, the hunter mistook him for a deer and shot him in the head, and then was possibly mauled by the dogs afterwards)

So that currently put him In his late 120’s to his early 130’s

Sir Pentious died in his 40’s in 1888, he does not have confirmed cause of death but it has been theorised that he died to an invention failure

Which currently puts him in his late 170’s

Cherri Bomb died in her 20’s in the 1980’s, she does not have a confirmed cause of death but it had been theorised she was shot and killed by police during one of her rallies judging by the X’s on her body, tho is could of also been in an explosion she caused

Which currently puts her in her 60’s

(Dickhead) Valentino died in his mid 40’s in the 1970’s, he does not have a confirmed cause of death but has been theorised to have died from some form of std probably HIV/AIDS, since it was around the time of the AIDS crisis between the 1970’s and 1980’s where unfortunately a lot of people, primarily gay men, were getting it and passing away (I’m apologise but I really don’t like this character)

which currently puts him in his 90’s

Vox died in his 30-40’s in the 1950’s, he does not have a confirmed cause of death but has been theorised to have been killed on set with a piece of equipment or a literal TV (he could have been a TV host in life)

Which currently puts him in his 100’s

The list of oldest to youngest with years of existence overall

Charlie (200’s)

Sir Pentious (late 170’s)

Alastor (120’s-130’s)

Husk (120’s)

Angel (110’s)

Vox (100’s)

Niffty (90’s-100’s)

Valentino (90’s)

Cherri bomb (60’s)

Vaggie (30’s)

The list of oldest to youngest according to the age they were when they first died (this is more of a rough estimate and personal opinion)

Husk (75)

Valentino (mid 40’s)

Sir Pentious (40’s)

Alastor (30’s-40’s)

Vox (30’s-40’s)

Angel dust (mid 30’s)

Cherri bomb (20’s)

Vaggie (20’s)

Niffty (22)

If you are interested in learning more about the characters causes of death theories, there are a few posts on Reddit and YouTube (and here ofc) that go more into depth about it, the video I originally watched was:

“How every Hazbin Hotel character perished” by the YouTuber KolkoCat

I believe the YouTuber “Ayy Lmao” has also touched on the topic multiple times as his channel is mostly dedicated to Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss content, you can also find other theories, reviews and analysis about the show there as well

[tiny-gay-satan]

gangggg i met a guy and i cant stop smiling. im gonna kms what the fuck is this.

[froody]

I hate it when actors talk about an animal they had to work with on set and it’s obvious they were not patient with the animal at all. You especially see this with non cat people who had to work with cats and are like “Working with that cat was the bane of my existence, never on cue, scratched me once, always seemed afraid of me.” Like yeah, she’s a cat. She could probably sense you hated her. It’s hard enough to be an animal in the entertainment industry without some guy being a dick to you. Are you that uncharitable with human costars (and particularly child actors) or do you just hate animals?

Conversely, it’s so heartwarming when an actor speaks positively about an animal they worked with and/or there are behind the scenes stories of the crew genuinely trying to make the animal comfortable and giving them grace.

One of my favorite examples of this is Mad Max 2 (1981) which was made on a budget of $4.5 million AUD (about $13.5 USD in today’s money). They ended up casting a dog from the pound that was scheduled to be put down and by all accounts the dog was a nightmare to work with. But most of the cast and crew loved him. The dog’s name was Dog so his character’s name was also Dog. He was difficult to train but super food motivated so they kept writing dog food into scenes for him. He kept freaking out on set and they couldn’t figure out what was wrong. Eventually they realized part of the reason he kept acting out was because he was terrified of the sound of cars and motorcycles so they had special doggy earplugs made. His character was supposed to be aggressive but real Dog was very affectionate and could not be made to behave aggressively so they had to use selective editing to make him seem more menacing. When filming was done multiple crew members wanted to adopt him because he was such a good bad boy. He was adopted by one of the stuntwomen and got to live out the rest of his life doing actual blue heeler things. That was his only film role.

[cashmoneyyysstuff]

shoto todoroki is fucking shameless. and surprisingly clingy.

he’d done a good job becoming a little more social little by little. he’s still a little wonky and awkward during the few times he tries to make conversation, but he tries and that’s the good part. you’re proud of him.

you’ve known shoto since you were kids, his closest friend, you’d seen him through it all and you’re so grateful that he’s found friends he feels comfortable and happy with, though he always reassures you that you’re dearest to him, which always makes you a little too giddy and flustered for somebody who’s supposed to be his closest friend and nothing more.

you’re in the cafeteria chatting with your mutual friends, shoto had told you to go off without him since he needed to go the bathroom and you found yourself sitting next to midoriya when he’d scooched in next to you, happy to see there was still a spot for him at the table. you liked midoriya a lot, he was sweet, cute and most importantly he made shoto come out of his shell in a way that you regrettably never could, plus the way he flails around when he gets embarrassed is pretty funny.

(you did notice ochaco’s face going completely blank for a few seconds, but you didn’t think much about it.)

after a few minutes of giggling and chatting shoto shows up, and something is immediately wrong with the way his natural straight face goes absolutely dead in the span of three seconds. it’s subtle, but you know him and it’s there. there also seems to be a chill in the room now.

he’s at your side of the table in three seconds, but he doesn’t register your smile in greeting as his cold gaze is glued to the green haired boy next to you.

“midoriya,” and his voice even sounds a little deeper, colder as he speaks like he somehow managed to use his right side on his mouth.

“that’s my seat.” he states calmly.

“oh ! my bad, todoroki !” izuku splutters an apology, but shoto’s eyes do not waver, staying fixed on the boy until he grabs his tray and makes a move to stand “i didn’t realize this was your spot, sorry !”

you feel a little bad at how intensely he’s apologizing, but you’re still shell shocked about that look. shoto seems unfazed though, his expression morphs slightly when izuku goes to squeeze in next to iida.

“i always sit next to yn.”

it’s so stupid. really, it is. how fast that makes your heart beat. because shoto does always sit next to you, he always has and he still always does when you come over to his house. but it’s the fact that he didn’t say he always sits here, in his unassigned assigned seat.

he said he always sits next to you. and your mind and heart races.

you don’t get much time to think because immediately he’s next to you, sighing before sitting as close to you as he can. he looks over to you and you look back, still a little startle but his features are soft again when he looks at you. he drops his utensils to thread his fingers with yours under the table.

“ did you wash your hands, mister ?” you tease, but you squeeze his hand when he squeezes yours. he frowns but it’s not the one from before. it almost looks like a pout and you snort.

“yes, i did.” he snips, you giggle and his eyes soften. even as you assure him you were just kidding he doesn’t mind, he couldn’t be mad at you.

you offer him a bite of your lunch as truce and he leans forward and plops a piece in his mouth from your chopsticks, then offers you a bit of his precious soba noodles and even holds a hand below them so they don’t spill because he insists on feeding you himself.

your friends pretend they don’t see the lowkey romantic exchange, but with the way shoto keeps insisting to have you eat his food and the soft barely there smile when you crack a joke that manages to break through his icey demeanor, they can start to figure out why he wanted to sit next to you so bad.

[kartoonatic]

Yes Ford is a monster fucker and yes Bill is even more of a monster fucker but just how much more is like, hard to process.

Bill is fucking with a creature which, from his perspective, has:

Infinite sides (euclidians are basic geometry)

Infinite sides that branch off into smaller extremities (do you think he realized at first the difference between a neck and a finger)

Is made out of several unique compounds (like what's the difference between flesh and bone and spit to him)

And he convinced that thing to do exactly what he wanted for the better part of it's natural life span. At one point had that thing hanging on his every word. Like I kinda get the hubris. If I successfully convinced an existential horror like that to do my bidding you couldn't talk me down from that high. And he says he likes me. Maybe like-likes me. I kinda get it.

You can argue that Bill likely came into contact with much stranger shit than humans during the entire period between meeting Ford and destroying his own home world, and you'd be right. But also I think while manipulating/romancing horrible space creatures might not be a completely new experience I also don't see how you could get bored of it.

[totallyseiso]

In the post about removing tipping.

"Rather than give money to creators you like to support their work you can instead buy them pointless shit no one cares about with zero monetary value they can put next to their username. They'll love that"

[spiderbitesandvampirevenom]

STOP TREATING THE USAMERICAN COLONIAL PROJECT LIKE IT IS COMPLETE!!!!! it is an active settler-colony, and by acting like it's not actively colonizing the land it is on you are literally doing their job for them. you all are like five minutes away from lamenting the fucking vanishing indian.

[liberalsarecool]

Republican masculinity is a disaster.

Where do you start? The insecurities? The complete lack of self-awareness? The control issues?

Imagine calling yourself a News Channel as you preach abandoning your second wife over not being able to manage your fragile ego as an admirable trait?

Conservative men are incels for the most obvious of reasons.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

You made her cry, time to die.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[theabigailthorn]

just got a transphobic commenter who said my transition didn't work because I'm "barely attractive" and I'm like

[couldvebeenus]

(inspo - screenshots)

[bitchylittlevictorianchild]

I just got out of military training for school, and let me tell you something. Just as much as COs push their companies/squads/what-have-you to their absolute limits...they also have an indomitable sense of humor that they will push onto their subordinates.

In other words, all those fics in the CoD Fandom about any character taking their anger/sadness/what-have-you out on their company by pushing them extra are true to an extent. But there is also the opposite side of that coin, which is this: COs often fuck around with their company and take out their good emotions on them. Which has the potential to be very, very funny.

Examples:

Soap: Private, when I say "Pop your shit, twin." you will drop that thang Magic Mike style, is that understood?

---

Ghost, with a thousand-yard-stare: Take this disposable plastic fork. It is now an inspectable item to be kept on your person at all times. You will give it a name starting with L.

---

Gaz, leading his company in a march: When I give the command, you will left-face and post an L at Delta Company, understood?

Price, leading Delta Company: Recruits! Right-face and flip off Bravo Company, am I clear?

---

Soap: Private? Who is the General of the sassy man apocalypse?

Recruit: Sir, Lieutenant Riley, sir!

Soap: Very well.

---

Ghost: Recruits! Do you think...that Sergeant Mactavish...is pretty?

Soap, posing like a 50s pinup: Recruits, say ooh! Say ahh!

---

Gaz: Private...you have IBS?

Recruit: Sir, I think so, sir.

Gaz, monotone: Me too. One time, I made the mistake of eating Taco Bell while inebriated. I cried on the toilet the whole night.

Price, walking the hallway behind him, trying not to laugh: LOCK IT UP!!

Gaz: From now on, your nickname will be Private Midshitman.

---

Ghost, yelling a jodie: Now, from the top!

Recruits, responding: Make it drop!

Ghost: That's a-?

Recruits: WAP!

Ghost: THAT'S A-?

Recruits: WAP!

--

Gaz, too tired to PT: Recruits, fall out on my command, and griddy into the barracks.

[shaxza]

james somerton’s biggest fear

[katnissandpeetamellark]

HERES THE DEAL

Lucy gray’s fate is meant to be a mystery

Like Highbottom said… mystery’s drive people crazy like that’s THE WHOLE DEAL. She haunts Snow because he doesn’t know WHAT happened exactly

Sitting there and telling people they’re stupid for believing either she’s alive or dead ??? Wack move. It’s literally not confirmed for either and I really doubt it ever will be as its supposed to haunt us as well.

[xanthickee]

Meanwhile American Invasion💀

someone take my phone away🙂

[tooblindtizzy]

from the floor of my mind