#the degradation paper
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Thinking about the Degradation Paper again and decided I'm just gonna drop the whole outline because this is a project that's already taken literal years but I wanna get some form of it out there. There are citations missing from the outline because there's a separate file with timestamped in-game video links in it, a folder of images to be linked as examples for certain points, and a whole bookmarks directory with every real-world scientific citation, so they're not all pasted in here. I don't assume people will be typing any of them in by hand anyway, I just wanna clarify that I do have citations for everything! It's just writing it all up that is...so extremely difficult.
The whole last section of the outline just says this:
I'll get there, me from the past.
#final fantasy vii#FFVII#final fantasy 7#FF7#crisis core#crisis core reunion#ccff7r#genesis rhapsodos#angeal hewley#vincent valentine#fandom ramble#wip wip wip#the degradation paper
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passages that make you whisper "oh my god"
#text!#working on a paper abt the degradation of the line between real/unreal in modern society and this one paragraph blew my MIND#like it literally tied all of my other sources together#also this whole paper is about how sex has disappeared from american media so if ur interested in that i highly recommend it
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you know considering how many clinically insane takes on history I’ve already seen I’m surprised no one wrote a paper on Alexander I’s sexuality yet. Like Napoleon has a whole book trying to prove he’s bi but Alexander “religious guilt” Romanov who doesn’t have any kids, keeps platonic relationships with nearly all his ‘mistresses’ and is routinely described as effeminate is supposed to be straight? Like there should be at least some sort of discussion about this
#idk maybe there already is a paper on it but I haven’t seen it#i’ve seen historians imply that but in a way that’s more degrading than actually trying to explore his orientation in a serious way#i need like a lisenced psychiatrist to write a paper about him asap#tsar alexander i#alexander i of russia
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Bastian and Volo - The Antichrist and his Hound
There once was a boy who served in a castle. The noble family who lived there paid him no mind.
One day, like a blow through the heart, that boy saw God.
Something bright. Something terrible. Something holy, greater than every blazing star: Bastian, second issue of the Duke of Burgundy, seething and ambitious and wrathful.
Souls depart the body through the eyes; the boy never looked away.
.
Bastian was eighteen when he noticed Volo: the young son of a stablehand who had taught himself to read, to carry, to serve. Desperately ready to file himself into a cold and razored sword for Bastian's hand, if only that hand would close like a collar around his neck.
And so, in time, Bastian seized him.
.
It is your turn to see them now, years on, as the storm gathers.
Ecce homo: A Conqueror on a pale horse, his banners flying behind him, with a hunger for heaven on his lips and a burning crown on his head. But that which truly bears his glory runs at his heel.
Ecce canis: A chaste and brutal Galahad, rimed with frost, leading the legions of his Lord to any end, any dictate, as long as he is granted the final honor of slitting his own throat on Bastian's altar.
They are linked by a silver chain. God to slave, king to knight, love to worship. Even death cannot break it.
.
There once was a dog who served his master. The dragon who holds his leash will never let it go.
#*KICKS OVER A CHAIR*#your honor they belong together (derogatory)#Bastian and Volo are the stuff of nightmares - the stuff of biblical prophecy and the utmost horror#and they are fully and completely obsessed with one another#it was a long road for Bastian to realize what he had in Volo but once he did he was uh -- radicalized shall we say#he fucking loves Volo - he loves his dog! - his dog just happens to be a perfect and chilly and upright twenty two year old man#and to be called a good dog by Bastian is to Volo like being called by name was to Christ's disciples#there is no task Volo will not fulfill - no act he will ever find degrading - nothing he will ever EVER hold back from his Lord#and Bastian knows that and loves that and loves him and takes and takes and takes and takes#Volo is the hilt of his great and terrible sword and Bastian knows no power like resting a hand on that hilt - at the nape of Volo's neck#they are so feral I am breathing into a paper bag about it every second#heretic
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"...!!!"
"...oh shit- I'm so sorry, Sal, I didn't mean to...!!"
"...uh, it's fine [y/n], just... try to watch your aim next time, okay...?" 💓💦
[Prison uniform and no shirt variations under the cut]
(Potential POV: He asked if you fr find him attractive and now the proof is all over his face whoops 😳💦💦💦)
#k.e.w.k. draws#sally face#sal fisher#sal fisher x reader#sal fisher x y/n#sorry steve#lemon#grapefruit#tw unsanitary#tw degradation#tw eye trauma#(kinda sorta not really but tagging just in case???)#i made this for me but you can look at it 🎁💖#i'll bet some of you thought i stopped simping didnt you#well jokes on you I was busy making digital paper dolls so i could simulate various scenarios of giving him a big fat facial uwu ✅#(and experimenting with drawing his scars and prosthetic a little more canon compliant whatcha think??)#PSA: do your best to not get that shit in anyones eye/ eye socket (it stings)#anyways happy yanbruary enjoy~ 💕💦#edited#very slightly#(i added a heart emoji to the dialog bc he still enjoyed himself overall despite you being an absolutely horrible shot 👍)
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my Actual most controversial silm take is that the tengwar kind of suck, as an alphabet
#mine#silm#silmarillion#tengwar#‘similar phonemes have similar base shapes and you modify the base to indicate which phoneme it is!’ your letters degrade like GARBAGE#similarity is actually your enemy when working with anything subject to information degradation. like PARCHMENT and PAPER#in a writing system where the length of a single stroke marks the difference between Four Different Letters#the same amt of damage to a manuscript makes it Significantly Harder to reconstruct that text#than it would be if the letters were BETTER DIFFERENTIATED.#however my second most controversial silm take is that turgon shouldn’t have killed eöl hope this helps <3
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I was stressed the fuck out for 2 months worked weekends etc to finish a paper my bosses kept pressuring me to work on so i could meet a journal deadline and now i am almost finished but i feel so drained and i just know this stupid fucking paper is not gonna matter at all it's gonna have 0 impact
#it's just gonna be in a fancy journal which is theoretically good for my carreer but it act isn´t caise i don´t wanna continue in academia#and no one outside of academia gives a fuck ab where you published your papers#my boss reviewed my final draft and she was like this is great well done and reading it made me so angry like#you humiliated me and pressured me sm for this. i don´t want your fucking praise. she showed le sm disrespect that i find ir offensive and#degrading that she continues to think i want validation from her. fuck her i don´t need praise from someone that belittles me#idgaf ab her or ab this work itns just a paycheck to me. i fibd fulfillment in other parts of my life. even if my supervisors want this to#be my passion#also one of my supervisors edited so much of the original draft that it feels like the praise is undeserved. i feel lije it´s his changes#that are actually good#the paper doesn´t feel mine anymore#it sucks cause i am a student i am supposed to learn through practice how to write good papers but he took over a lot cause he wanted to#meet the deadline#and now i´m like... for what? i got a paper that doesn´t feel mine in a fancy journal. for what? who cares?
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one of my biggest pet peeves and my smallest hill to die on is when people act like parchment is just The Old Fashioned Paper, or worse, use those terms interchangeably. it’s especially egregious in the fantasy genre, of course.
and i can kind of see how they got there: a lot of surviving texts from medieval europe are on parchment and that influences the way people perceive things; because ofc western fantasy draws a LOT of things from medieval times, that just gets exported along with the ideas that thatched houses are constantly falling apart and gothic churches come pre-blackened with soot
there’s a lot of ground to cover with the history of the written word, but the thing about paper is that it really took off because the gutenberg press made it fast and cheap to make books and paper was CHEAP and much easier to produce. parchment is expensive and, quite frankly, a much more limited resource (and it also didn’t disappear after the printing press took off. i’ve seen books printed on vellum, but by that point it was for the novelty/explicitly because it was so expensive). but it does have significant longevity vs paper, so of course it was usually reserved for important cultural items. people wouldn’t be using parchment to make a flyer for the county fair or to advertise a job, and probably only used it for correspondence if they’re very rich. granted, before the printing boom galvanized literacy levels (because it made reading material cheaper and more accessible), generally only rich people were literate and would have a need for something to read and write on, but there have been pamphlets forever
paper existed before the 13th century and honestly, whether it was anachronistic in real life shouldn’t bother you in a made up setting and anyway PLEASE remember that paper and parchment are not the same thing
#i don’t even know what set me off this time lol i was just standing at the toaster and blacked out#i know i say a lot of things are my biggest pet peeve but GOD this might actually be it#extremely low stakes and irrationally high annoyance#spell scrolls printed on parchment. iffy. i understand they need to be transcribed with expensive paper but also#what is the average wizard’s cow body count#honestly if we’re gonna be REAL picky and wizards are supposed to use the high end fancy shit. their spell books should be on vellum#another thing to note abt this tho#parchment isn’t indestructible. it needs to be kept under very specific conditions or it will bloat#fun fact: this is why old books had clasps or chains on them. so they could keep it closed tightly and limit moisture getting in#but it doesn’t degrade like paper does#the category of ephemera is fascinating to me. the stuff that wasn’t meant to stick around like wrappers and ads and flyers#most of that stuff was on cheap paper and has long since disintegrated bc no one thought to preserve it bc why would they#yknow. the stuff we generally consider trash lol. but when it’s OLD trash i want to study it#mine
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I'm working on the degradation writeup and....uh.
This is normal, right. This is is a normal thing that normal people do when discussing fictional media. Surely. Surely this is normal.
Jiminy Fucking Christmas no wonder I imprinted on Genesis so hard when he treats Loveless the same way I treat FF7.
#fandom ramble#wip wip wip#nashi writes#I guess#meta analysis#maybe I'll finally finish this thing#maybe#crisis core#crisis core reunion#CCFF7R#genesis rhapsodos#the full title btw#is 'Characterizing Degradation: Transmissible Hyperactive Apoptosis via Hostile Mitochondrial Diffusion'#the degradation paper
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being the only person you know who is struggling is so fucking humiliating.
we’re talking about getting me a job at a gas station. my friends all make $60K plus.
i have to work in a gas station.
#man so glad i almost died to finish my fucking degree#so glad i worked my ass off for five fucking years so i can watch everyone else succeed and i can be a 36 year old gas station employee#again#when all my friends were going off to college#i was working in a fucking gas station#my friends got to be people and i got to be a fucking gas station employee#my friends all get to be treated with respect at work#i get to work in retail#yep going into debt so deeply i’ll probably never be able to pay it off was worth it#all so i can do fucking minimum wage menial labor.#great.#fantastic.#love that for me.#didn’t make me radically suicidal the first time around nah#everyone else gets to succeed#while i only ever get to fail in the shittiest and most humiliating way possible#cool cool cool#i’m going to bite my fucking wrists open all over the first customer who talks to me#i would legitimately rather be dead than have to work in customer service#it’s so fucking degrading. no one thinks you’re a person. no one cares.#minimum wage 36 year old fuck up loser#that’s me#awesome great cool awesome#everyone else gets a normal happy life & i get nothing#because i don’t know#something is missing in me#i am woefully inadequate to the task#hey what’s a good job for stupid idiot fuck up morons who can’t do anything & wasted 5 years & 70 thousand fucking dollars#on a fucking sheet of paper#that doesn’t even list my fucking degree
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I don’t know who needs to hear this, but if you’re thinking of using masking tape for long term labels for the love of everything good in this world DO NOT. That shit degrades so fast and becomes crumbly as hell. Use a piece of paper and put it inside if you can, or use any other material.
#paper is most reliable least likely to instantly degrade#but other stuff can work#most tapes just become so brittle so fast#most of these samples are from the 70s-90s and the tape is already hot garbage
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unpopular (maybe?) opinion: the kombat kids would've definitely worked better if they weren't introduced as the next generation
#tox talks#by that i mean#making them their own separate characters without being tied to the og cast#sure it wouldn't fix all the issues (like lack of individuality for cassie and jacqui. takeda and jin are okay-ish by standard)#but the main reason they're despised is because they fall into this dreadful trope#i will say: even this trope can be done well with enough thought put into it#but when games like mk do it... it indicates the degradation of the franchise#not knowing what to do#wanting to do something new#and failing#it's quite sad because i for one genuinely enjoyed jin as a character#his gimmick is quite unique and his story + personality sound really cool on paper#if only nsr were able to execute it well enough too#i think the weakest of the four is jacqui as she doesn’t bring anything to the table#cassie is another wasted potential (also she's identical to her mother which is? not how genetics work?)#(also hate her story and how she was even born)#takeda is fine. just fine#he's a mix of both of his parental figures but at least he's not just a blatant copy of either of them#though i'd argue he looks more like hanzo than kenshi#anyways i love them#i want to try and make ocs that are inspired by them but like. actually do them juctice#me to these four: I'M GON GET YOU OUTTA HERE /ref#mortal kombat#mk#cassie cage#jacqui briggs#takeda takahashi#kung jin#mortal kombat x#mkx
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just remembered how much of a deplorable movie the last jedi was and convulsed. rian is really going to hell lmao
#i cant believe he did every character in the movie dirty#the fact that tlj was carrie’s last film and leia was placed in a coma a majority of her screentime. yeah pls die#the plot being so paper thin and nonsensical#luke being ooc. rey turning into… THAT…#finn being shocked and slapped and degraded.#gwen having 2 minutes of screentime#just terrible truly a 0/10 will never watch again
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I get it when you're a kid or a teen, but when you're an adult, 30 years old, and even your stick figures look like shit (ie me), there's a level of shame there.
"So what? Shake it off. It doesn't matter. Everyone starts off that way-" Except artists waaaaay better than me will talk shit about their art. They feel frustration and shame towards something I stare at all year long on my laptop.
When you don't have talent for it? It almost feels like entering a world of masochism, and like... why would I do that.
"I cant draw" then do it bad who gives a fuck.....
#the issue is how prominent self-degradation is in the art world#I wish I could just put pencil 2 paper & ENJOY- but idk how to turn off the critical part of my brain until I hit a mark several years late
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#too ashamed to admit this on twt but ehy do i have a maggot infestation.#i cant be that disgusting . that theres maggots . crawling on my floor im literally . dawg i hust wanna do my laundry#have a feeling thered smth hidden in Something near the washjnh machine but also#idk i just how the fuck do i get rid of them im literally . HOW. HOW .#whatever ill figure it thr fuck out#i just YUCK man .#majority of them being in the fabric bag from my laundty basket (whuch was jus sitting on the floor ubder a picture frame)#i jus i put fuckint socks on just so i could walk n not wanna c r y#whatever whatever whatever whatever !!!!!!!!!!!!#will contunue to do this fucming laundry n fifure it iut . in just lacking tbe energy bc dawg this is so fucking disgusting i dont#understand where theyre coming from#or why tjeyre HERE . if anything id expect them arou d where the cat bowl is (i havent had my cat jn a week#n i havent exsctly cleaned the station sk its . kinda gross ill admit)#anyway . will get to that im working kn it#putting vloves on fuxk this#adoptibg the mindset kf “life has no set rules” has kinda saved my life in an odd way#like . i can do whatever the fick i want to function at home . n that rlly meant buying single use gloves and sponges i can theow iu#after one use bc like . fuck that fr (yea its paper towels what abt it. theyre vio degradeable AND easy shhh)
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So I'm researching mitochondria to get citations together for my eventual writeup on degradation and I have learned a thing that actually works really well with my theory and I'm really excited about it!
Okay so, the short version is that Jenova operates via the mitochondria, because they're the only organelle that was originally its own separate organism, they divide separately from the rest of the cell; I'm working on a detailed writeup that will have citations about all this but I AM REALLY EXCITED so bear with me here.
The only type of cell in the human body that doesn't have any mitochondria is the red blood cell, which makes sense since they basically eject the majority of their organelles (up to and including the nucleus) to make as much room as possible for hemoglobin to facilitate effective respiration.
This means that Genesis' strain of Jenova would be bloodborne only via white blood cells. White blood cells can pass through tissues and organ walls effortlessly through a method known as migration, which isn't well understood and is also the method by which fetal cells transfer to the mother during pregnancy—something discussed at length in my earlier ramble about when Lucrecia had her seizure.
So basically I'm almost definitely right about how Jenova works! And this is why Sephiroth was told that Jenova is his mother! Mitochondrial DNA is always matrilineal, if he got his from Jenova then she is his mother, in one genetic sense!
#fandom ramble#incomplete but still#genesis rhapsodos#sephiroth#jenova#jenova project#the degradation paper
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