#the cool uncles

[junglemax]

kyle o’reilly and hook talk about their uncles while waiting to be picked up.

[drabble]

Kyle skips along the path up until he makes it to Hook’s side, where he plops down next to him. “Hi, Hook!”

Hook nods at him. He holds his backpack a little tighter in his arms.

“Who’s picking you up today?” Kyle asks.

“My uncle Joe,” Hook responds.

“Ooh, I don’t think I’ve seen your uncle before. That’s funny though, because my uncle Mark is picking me up today! I love hanging out with him, he’s crazy, but it’s funny. It’s his birthday this weekend, so we’re celebrating at his house. He’s got a pool, and some four wheelers. And we’re probably gonna shoot fireworks too! It’ll be like the Fourth of July! We’re gonna be eating a lot of fish that he caught. So, he’s picking me up today so I can help get ready for this weekend! What about you? Why’s your uncle picking you up today?”

“Dad and mom had to go somewhere for the weekend.”

“And you couldn’t go?”

Hook shakes his head.

“Huh. Well, what’s your uncle like?”

Hook thinks about it for a moment. “He’s big. And teaches me how to wrestle.”

Kyle gasps and his eyes go wide. “Your uncle teaches you how to wrestle? That’s so cool! I wanna learn! Can I come over someday so he can teach me? Maybe I can ask my uncle to teach me, or bring me over to your uncles house. Maybe our uncles can hang out and be friends too!”

Hook shrugs. “Maybe.”

The car line is two lanes, and just their luck, both of their uncles are side by side.

“My uncle’s here! Uncle Mark!” Kyle shouts and waves before getting up.

Hook gets up too. “My uncle is right next to yours.” He walks on over.

“Bye, Hook! I’ll talk to you on Monday! Teach me what you learn!” Kyle waves and gets into his car.

Hook waves back and gets in his car.

Joe smiles as Hook tosses his backpack in the back seat. “Hey, champ. That a friend of yours?”

“I guess,” Hook mumbles.

“You guess? What’s that supposed to mean?” Hook shrugs, and Joe rolls his eyes. “You’re such a weird kid. So quiet, unlike your dad.”

Meanwhile Kyle is talking up a storm in his car. “-and I said, well maybe your uncle can teach me some wrestling stuff, and he said maybe! Isn’t that so cool? Do you know any wrestling moves? Could you teach me some if you do? Please?”

“Do I?” Mark asks, and laughs. “Boy, I’ll have you twisted five ways to Sunday when we get home. I’ll teach you how to be the best of the best if you want!”

“Yes!” Kyle high-fives his uncle. “This is gonna be the best weekend ever!”

[moonieee]

How i see Wei wuxian leading the band of disciples through out the book:

[prlssprfctn]

AU, where Bruce accidentally gets de-aged (physically and mentally), and the first person he bumps in is... Red Hood.

To Jason's defence, he didn't connect the dots at first. He was just patrolling around his usual turf, thinking of nothing in particular, when he saw a small child in a ridiculously serious suit, sulking around Crime Alley. He looks distraught, and considering that he looks rich, it is no surprise - that is not a place for him. So, he is either lost or something happened, right?

He takes the helmet off, as he usually does when he is dealing with kids (they got scared easily) and carefully approaches a brooding baby.

'Hey, shrimp. Where are your parents at?'

That said shrimp turns around, his big blue eyes looking confused and lost, and Jason thinks he looks awfully familiar.

'I am not shrimp,' he protests instantly, pouting at him. 'And they are somewhere... here. We just left the movie theatre together!'

Jason glances at the abandoned movie theatre, back at the little rich boy with a familiar frown, and it clicks. This is his fucking dad. Suddenly, a kid - but it is fucking Bruce Wayne, for sure.

'Was watching Zorro by any chance?' Jason still asks, just to be sure that he is not going insane.

Bruce - and it must be him - beams at him.

'Yes! This is a great movie, by the way.'

Oh, hell. At least, he didn't witness his parents' death just yet. Jason wasn't sure he would be able to deal with his father being so small, and mourning his mom and dad. He would probably cry himself at some point.

'Hey,' Jason calls out for him slowly, squatting down; God, who would've thought that this little shrimp would become so tall and big in the future. 'Aren't you... You must be Thomas's kid, right?'

Okay, yeah, Jason is going to lie to this kid. Because there is no way he manages just to steal Bruce as a stranger to bring him back home; it is still a kid, even if it is his father. Right?

'You know my dad?' Bruce tilts his head, little fingers tugging on the hem of his jacket; suspicious.

'You could say that,' Jason nods. 'Alfie... I mean, Alfred called me. Asked me to pick up a kid, since Thomas and Martha got an urgent call.'

Fuck his life and stupid life choices. What the hell he was even doing? He looked like a mugger; or like a psycho. But Alfred was his best bet - he could call him, after all; ask, well, support his idiotic made-up story.

'No one calls Alfred Alfie but my dad,' Bruce pouts in a very, very spoiled manner.

'Well... I do. We served together in the army,' he blurts out.

His armour, apparently, is enough a proof for the kid to nod slowly.

'Okay. But you gotta take off your strange mask first,' Bruce folds arms on his chest.

...???

Did this kid just agree for an unknown man to take him home? Like this? Who could've thought that this pouty child would become the most paranoid man alive in the future?

'Uh, why?'

'So I can remember your face and do an identikit, if you turn out to be a bad guy,' Bruce smirks stupidly. 'Duh.'

Jason is going to cry. This kid is so cute.

'Yeah, duh,' Jason huffs, but despite his better judgment takes the domino mask off as well. 'Go on, take your time. My identikit should be the prettiest, shrimp.'

Bruce... gawks at him. His eyes are comically wide now, mouth open, and then, he jumps a little closer to him - oh, God, he is jumping when excited? - putting his hellishly cold hands on Jason's cheeks.

'Woah. You look like dad.'

'Uh,' Jason nods awkwardly, and because he is an idiot, adds a joke: 'We are brothers, actually. Just don't talk much.'

...Apparently, little Bruce can't take jokes. Because he lets out an adorable gasp, and throws himself on Jason as if they knew each other for ages now.

'Uncle? That's so cool. You look like Zorro!'

Damn this little kid, and this stupid family. Damn Joe Chill and the night he killed this kid's parents. Damn it all. Bruce might be an asshole sometimes, but he was so... cute and innocent.

'Thanks, shrimp,' Jason slides a domino mask back on, picks up little Bruce with one arm, and grips a helmet with another. 'Come on, let's go home. Alfred will make your favourite tiramisu.'

'You know my favourites?!'

Jason sniffles.

'Yeah. Yeah, I do, kid.'

If he gets so emotional over this kid, he has no idea how worse Dick is going to be once he finds out.

Oh, this is going to be one hell of a night.

[chloesimaginationthings]

FNAF Abby and Gregory discover Michael is an artist too

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Put that thing back or so help me.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

[lesansnom]

Damien Lavey et son oncle méga cool : Hellboy !!

Il avait commencer à se couper les cornes pour faire comme tonton avant de se prendre une giga raclée des darons

J'ai sûrement trop joué à Monster Prom ces derniers jour mais je veux battre ce putain de soleil !!

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

[aithusarosekiller]

Andy leaving her sisters/cousins to babysit her daughter would be insane

Like baby tonks learnt her chaos from somewhere and it wasn't from Ted, it was very much a 'mums side of the family' thing

-

Bella, standing in the corner: 🧍what does it want from me

Sirius, holding her: I don't know?!?! Why is she staring like that oh my god, please blink Dora

Narcissa: stop holding her like that you useless imbecile, you'll mess up her spine...no that's WORSE

Bella: make it stop staring at me

Reggie, coming to take her away from Sirius: I don't even like this baby but I chose to save you all from your incompetence so you are welcome

Baby tonks: :D

Narcissa, who had just tried to hold her and stop her from crying, claiming 'babies love me': what on earth did you do?

Reggie: no clue.

[morriemonnie]

babysitting is kinda hard ... 🫡

[just-more-pr0mts]

Consider an alternate universe (AU) where Danny is dragged along to a gala and introduced as Vlads heir. And instead of the classic meeting bat children, he meets a young Bruce Wayne.

The young Bruce is around 4ish and Danny makes quite the impression on him being the "cool older boy who can make snowflakes". Next thing he knows Danny is coming around the Manor 3 times a week to babysit Brucie.

They grow up together for 4 long years. Danny hanging out with Bruce and Galas and being an older brother figure for him. Until the fateful night of the Wayne family murder. Now there aren't any more galas and Alfred's busy taking care of things around the manor. Soon Bruce and Danny loose all forms of contact.

Skip to years later, when the Justice League summon the ghost king, intending to establish a peace treaty after a harsh scolding from contsintine and dr fate. And when Danny comes through the swirling green portal in full Ghost king regalia and swoops down and Hugs Batman. And when batman doesn't back away and proceeds to hug back.

Chaos, absolute chaos

[areallyyellowmango]

Anastacha's "cool uncle or whatever" ™️

[cartoonguy08]

Just a thought

I hc Soldier as a good dad figure even before he had kids (that man’s an awesome dad I just know it). I’m gonna go insane.

[zevampirex]

Don’t disturb the hobbit when they eat

[divine-draws]

they're watching magical mystery cure. me too girl, me too

[levemetal]

Shen Jiu becomes a Qian Cao Peak disciple AU

This is my excuse of yet another MuJiu AU. Incredibly silly but basically:

Before SJ was accepted to the peaks, the future Mu Qingfang finds him and immediately imprints on this sad traumatized orphan. So he gets his shizun to poach SJ for their peak. They agree, mostly because they have been unable to get SJ to, you know, get a medical checkup.

SJ is apphrensive cause A) who tf is this med student clinging onto him 24/7 B) why does he want to help him??? Without anything in return?? and C) he is a monster who can do no good, so why would he go to a peak of doctors? Surely this must be a mistake?

But it's okay, they can *teach* him how to do good. They can teach him to help, that all these things are choices rather than something you need to be born with. Slowly, but surely.

His cultivation problems? Can be fixed! They can treat him immediately, and somehow, a certain An Ding disciple always finds stupidly rare plants for the treatments he needs. It's not perfect but I imagine that a lot of his cultivation problems could be resolved. Especially with a shixiong who is all too eager to help out. And make sure he eats right damnit!! Shidi one meal every few days is NOT good nutrition!

Since I personally like to imagine that SJ is a plant nerd, maybe he becomes the plant encyclopedia for the peak. His bedside manners need work, but he's a great pharmacist!

Going down to the brothel to sleep is also no longer a huge problem. No Liu Qingge, he's obvs going there for clinic practice and helping out the women in the brothel! They need medical assisstence without judgement you know.

As for his Qi-ge predicament, maybe he is able to sense something wrong about YQY's cultivation and confronts him then and there cause Qi-ge. Qi-ge what stupid thing did you do. Qige you dumbass.

Mu QIngfang still becomes the peak lord, but SJ is happy to do his thing on the peak, probably a hallmaster or simple pharcamist/specialist. Somehow MQF wormed his way into SJ's prickly guarded heart and SJ's his closest confidant on the peak, to the point that he trusts SJ to handle other peak lords as patients too. (He's good at knocking out LQG so the brute will finally get treated. No you can't walk off a broken leg and 10 broken ribs shixiong.)

Either way, they're happy, they're cozy! Maybe one day SJ brings Ning Yingying along from one of his trips down the mountain. She'd do great on QIng Jing, but she has decided she wants to stay on QIan Cao with Jiu-shushu. Another day he brings in Ming Fan from the disciple selection, and as always Ming Fan becomes the eternally stressed mom-friend to all his shidis on the peak.

TLDR: Shen Jiu is literary happy on every other peak than Qing Jing how the fu-

[tapakah0]