#the calculus

[callmebliss]

Y’ever read something and have understanding that has eluded you interminably suddenly stop, curl up, and snuggle neatly into a fold in your brain because a new way opened to it?

[lianmilanesa]

Alternative universe

[stormtide-leviathan]

I don't actually want to pass as cis, I want to be visibly a trans woman and be gendered correctly because people see trans women as equally women as cis women

[professorcalculusstanaccount]

as newspapers today dont tend to hire children, a modern day Tintin would run a clickbait YouTube channel, except the clickbait is 100% real every single time

he starts off as an irritating conservative pundit at 14, meets Chang then leaves the think tank paying him and launches his own independent channel and blows up shortly after. Chang helps with video editing and managing his socials and they often chat on video calls between adventures. Haddock, his foster dad, has absolutely no knowledge of his earlier videos.

[evercelle]

but the show must go on

[kimeoshi]

Corrupted Ratio for Twitter! Reached 2k followers and he won in a prompt game

Timelapse:

[saintforan]

McChicken sandwich

without the copypasta ver cause they look cute on their lil date

[lothmoth]

did you know they say calculus is the language of God. did you know they tried to hold math up to infinity like a candle to the void. did you know statisticians plunged into the vastness of random chance and picked out patterns and equations and eight hundred ways to tell you how big your inevitable errors are and how far off those guesses at errors might be. math haters I can't sit with you anymore. human innovation is cradled in these ancient, methodical, desperate attempts at understanding what we are not designed to understand

[dreams-of-soft-rain]

kirby reads hatcher!

[ryuusea]

mornings with a math professor…

inspired by this twt

[pimn]

my calc professor just called inflection points nonbinary critical points and I'm like ah yes the 3 genders, local maximum local minimum and inflection point

[monochromeia]

Reading The Way of Kings is really funny so far because you go from reading about Kaladin and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day(s) to Shallan and her sailor buddy Yalb's wacky book-buying adventure back to Kaladin about to fucking kill himself.

[miscellaneousmathematics]

[professorcalculusstanaccount]

Tintin's first conversation with Martine since the archive theft goes surprisingly cordially. Chang is left in the middle, wading through everyone's complicated emotions.

Follows on from here! Part of my story, The Fractured Urn.

I tried to model Calculus' lab as closely to references I could find in The Calculus Affair. The swimming pool is entirely made up by me and has no roots in canon, I just like to imagine it was built to celebrate Rastapopoulos taking a final tumble off a cliff! The Incredibly Sus statue of Haddock is my take on the statue Ramo Nash creates of Haddock at the end of Alph Art. I based the design on this 25th anniversary illustration for Tintin magazine!

[furiouskettle]

you know those cartoons where rodents go on adventures and solve mysteries

i cannot decide what to make calculus. theres sooo many options

and, of course, snowy

[shoccoe]

So… I may or may not have written an entire Conlang based on a single joke in Minecraft Parkour Civilization 2. That would be ridiculous. Aha. Hahahaha. Ha.

*cough*

A Quick Guide to Writing in Parkour

Flourish List.

You add these in front of blocks to change their meaning. There’s a key at the bottom containing the Parkour alphabet which demonstrates how the space, 180°, 360°, and 720° Flourishes are used to refer to specific English-Letter analogs.

_ = Space

C = 180° Flourish = 5 spaces

O = 360° Flourish = 10 spaces

8 = 720° Flourish = 20 spaces

? = Reverse = Reverses input

^ = Vertical Jump = Raises Intensity

v = Drop = Lowers Intensity

Block List.

These are the building blocks (lmfao) of the language and are what would be counted as an “input” or “letter”. Also included are short legends under each block describing what each flourish does to each block!

(Note! _,C,O, and 8 cannot be applied to any block other than [ ] and H)

[ ] = Block = Grammatical Value

(?[ ] = Capitalized)

(^[ ] = Impassioned)

(v[ ] = Depressed)

H = Fence = Numerical Value

(?H = Negative)

(^H = Exponential)

(vH = Square Root)

u = Pot = Period

(?u = Comma)

(^u = Hyphen/Equality)

(vu = Parentheses)

I = Pane = Question

(?I = Exclamation)

(^I = Command)

(vI = Sarcasm)

% = Brewing Stand = Addition

(?% = Subtraction)

(^% = Multiplication)

(v% = Division)

Alphabet

a = [ ]

b = _[ ]

c = __[ ]

ch = ___[ ]

d = ____[ ]

e = C[ ]

f = _C[ ]

g = __C[ ]

h = ___C[ ]

i = ____C[ ]

j = O[ ]

l = _O[ ]

m = __O[ ]

n = ___O[ ]

o = ____O[ ]

p = OC[ ]

r = _OC[ ]

s = __OC[ ]

sh = ___OC[ ]

t = ____OC[ ]

th = 8[ ]

u = _8[ ]

v = __8[ ]

w = ___8[ ]

y = ____8[ ]

Numbers

0 = H

1 = _H

2 = __H

3 = ___H

4 = ____H

5 = CH

6 = _CH

7 = __CH

8 = ___CH

9 = ____CH

Now that you have all the tools, let’s put it all together~!

————————————

?8[ ]____C[ ]__OC[ ] ____C[ ]__OC[ ] OC[ ][ ]_OC[ ]__[ ]____O[ ]_8[ ]_OC[ ]?I

____CHH% _HH ^u _HHH

?C[ ][ ]____OC[ ] 8[ ]C[ ] _OC[ ]____C[ ]___[ ]^I

————————————

Big thanks to my friend PrismaticKoi for giving me the idea and helping me figure this all out! Working with her made this process super fun!!!

Enjoy Parkour-!!! I’ll be coding an English<—>Parkour translator at some point, so stick around to find that!!

All of you need to go watch Minecraft Parkour Civilization though. It’s seriously fantastic.