#the bpd doesn't help

[creatureintheaffinicompact]

as much as the kink part of being florted is hot, it will never compare to the sheer fantasy of being taken care of without expectations. i keep fantasizing about it, the idea of being cared for and loved despite my disorders. that world where i can be taken in and helped, to have my owner wash me and cuddle me after, the absolute sensation that i will never have to worry about being abandoned again echoing in her biorythm. to finally feel safe enough to be weak, to be vulnerable and know that it wont get me hurt, to bare my soul to someone with the awareness that they will love what lies within.

to me being owned just means being loved for the simple reason of existing

[fernlessbastard]

hot take moment cwilbur is literally just psychotic as all hell and i think people got way too comfortable villianizing the shit out of a man who was clearly portraying signs of severe mental illness. cwilbur was like im so fucking paranoid and scared and i think everyone is out to get me and hurt me and ive spiralled to the point i cant reach out to the people closest to me because im so afraid and lost in this spiral and im having constant panic attacks and hurting myself because i dong know what to do with myself and the only way out for me is to die. and everybody was like EVIL MAN WHO ENJOYS HURTING OTHERS AND IS ABUSIVE ON PURPOSE AND A VILLAIN AND SHOULD NEVER BE TRUSTED AGAIN. and then he came back and was like im still deeply troubled and afraid but im desperately trying to make up for the wrongs i did in the past and the people i hurt in my own way and communication is really hard for me but i hope people know that im truely sorry and i love them. im going to try my hardest to fix this in the only way i know how and then respectfully remove myself from the situation because i feel thats the kindest thing i can do to the people ive hurt. and people were like ABUSER ABUSER ABUSER EVIL MAN ABUSER. like girl

Yeah no based true real no questions asked

I'd hope I manage to portray Wilbur the way he deserves in my content, cause that man is heavily bpd coded and he just needs therapy and someone who genuinely loves him but also can handle his bullshit (which has exclusively and reliably been Quackity like, canonically)

But yeah no completely agreed. The man has issues and has definitely fucked up a lot but at the end of the day he really does need love and care and patience, but also boundaries (and therapy and meds, obviously)

[trainerethan]

In my imagination of red and leaf being twins and both autistic I think the only reason leaf doesn't have the same totally blank 😐 face as red is because she did the age old classic of practicing facial expressions in the mirror every day until she learned the basic ones. She also made her default expression a smile 🙂 to seem more approachable.

Unfortunately since the expressions don't come naturally to her and she had to learn them, the can come off as exaggerated/overly dramatic. Which is fine for some people but others find it equally as off-putting as reds poker face. It makes her a little sad when people dislike her because of it bc shes doing her best to fit in but can't seem to get it right.

She puts a lot of effort into masking at least when she's a kid-teenager but once she's older and has made more solid friendships she can let herself relax and not need to stress about it so much, although in social situations she may still slip back into old habits.

Red does not mask and never really has. I choose 2 believe his mom was really supportive and accommodating so he wasn't forced to hide his autistic traits unlike leaf. This is because in my au they are twins but their parents split and leaf had to stay with their dad. Who is not as understanding as their mom.

Idk if he'd be actually horrible to her but he was not as patient or understanding as their mom + leaf also just craved more friends and wanted to be able to socialize more so she eventually learned how. Red is content with the 4 people he knows (mom, oak, daisy, green) and prefered to mostly be alone so he didn't have that motivating factor to do it.

He was very content with having one friend, green, but he was def lonley during their "rival" phase when green stopped hanging out with him and was focused on trying to prove himself in some way only he understood or worried about. Along with that is green also being the master of masking for the most part. I don't see oak as being particularly accommodating and patient with him so while Daisy probably was, she's also not a parent so she couldn't be responsible for caring for green the way oak should've been.

As they got older green also craved to be seen as cool and popular amongst his peers so he started masking heavily and also distanced himself from red. Unfortunately he realizes that being accepted for a fake version of himself by mainly strangers is actually very lonley and he misses their friendship 😢 but atp he probably figures red wouldn't wanna be friends again bc of how green ignored him for so long so I think they don't become close again until After the gym challenge "rivalry"/red dissapearing/reuniting years later. So they were both missing each other a lot but both felt unable to reach out bc of the distance that grew between them when green pulled away. Anyways tldr green pro masker leaf trying very hard to mask but struggling a bit and red rawdogging his autism never masked a day in his life.

[clowngore]

mental illness/personality disorder acceptance isn't "i should be able to do what i want forever with no consequences because of my disorder, and if you get mad at me for being an asshole then you are being ableist"

instead it's not believing in thought crime. it's not thinking that low empathy makes you a bad person. it's not judging attention-seeking behavior. it's not enforcing ableist societal standards on people who can't meet them. it's being understanding when people are trying their best. it's not thinking that doing bad things makes you irredeemably a bad person forever, and supporting people who want to do better.

you do not deserve to have your harmful behaviors 100% excused just because you are mentally ill. you are still hurting people. you don't have the moral right to hurt people, and it doesn't make you superior to not want to get better.

[graveyarrdshift]

born to "hiiiii :3" forced to be medicated

[violentcal2]

I need to control my jealousy issues actually so um um I'm no longer jealous I'm sane :3 !!!!

[sinkingisbetter]

bf refused to come to bed all of last night and then slept all day today and now he's planning on staying downstairs again all night and now I'm going to get unreasonably upset about this because I've barely seen him all day and now he's going to begrudgingly spend like fifteen minutes with me because he feels like he's obligated to and he's going to make fun of me when I get upset he's leaving

[clownprince]

Mfw I have my heart set on addressing Joker's aspd in this fic but the entire field of psychology is so horrifically ableist against cluster b personality disorders there are next to no resources on what aspd recovery looks like because the general consensus is that it isn't possible

[bhaalsbabe]

Love how I'm either paranoid that everybody secretly hates me and talks about me behind my back but at least I have the illusion of friendship OR I cut all ties so I don't have to think about how much everyone hates me but then feel lonely and don't speak for days to anyone and it's killing me inside

[forgotten-daydreamer]

one day people will stop saying they have bpd just because they get "irrationally angry sometimes", but that day is not today, unfortunately for us all.

[peony-pearl]

Got prescribed some new meds for a while everyone wish me luck

[borderlinebastard]

I can't talk to people about my problems because their reassurance goes through this filter in my brain which makes it sound like "awwww diddums! you're having a hard time with something everyone has to do! oh, poor you, boohoo 🥺 the world should make itself easier just for you. gws"

[wild-at-mind]

TW abuse talk

Hey, remember that era of tumblr when it was completely acceptable and social justice-y to say: let us describe our perfect gay trans nonbinary world which we were going to build, our utopia. What would we do about rapists and abusers you ask? Well we will just kill them! Easy solution!!

[1101200905]

experiencing mild inconveniences and being suuuuper normal about it. my plans falling thru did not ruin my entire day !!11! the action or inaction of another person has never made me feel abandoned in any way actually and I'm being really cool about it

[graveyarrdshift]

the way my grandma can completely ruin my mood by belittling me should be studied

[katyspersonal]

BPD lack of objects permanence regarding friends and associates is so ridiculous, and inconvenient for both sides. Like, you completely lose sleep once you pick up on subtle signs of something being wrong, and another person most likely will turn on you exactly because of this issue. It is just, like

- Hey, do you still like me?

- Of course I do, you know that?!

- Yes, but you said that two days ago, literally everything could have changed since then!