#we as in people who actually (unfortunately) have it

[salemlunaa]

☀︎it’s not transactional ☀︎

stop looking at methods as a unit of currency…

When people speak of relationships, they say it shouldn’t be transactional because that’s toxic. For example just because your boyfriend/girlfriend has done something nice for you doesn’t mean you owe him or her sex. And the same goes for your relationship with manifesting, you aren’t owed your desires just because you did some method? And why? because you already have them.

Stop seeing methods as if it’s some unit of exchange!! what it’s not:

you do the method ➯ you get your manifestation

you affirm “I AM” ➯ you induce the void state

you listen to that one subliminal ➯ you have your dream body

It’s not something that you exchange, it’s not “I give my time and effort to this method and then in return I get my manifestation” stop seeing it like money. With money you give and you get something you paid for in return. That’s not how it works here because you don’t need to get something you already have and failure to understand will cost you a lot of time with your manifestations and will cost you a lot of blood sweat and tears that just don’t need to shed.

Methods don’t help you get things, the things you wanted were yours the second you wanted them to be. What methods do is remind you, because unfortunately we live in a society that drills a horrible way of thinking into our heads. Thinking that tells us that “nothing is free”, “you have to work for what you want”, “life isn’t fair”. And due to this thinking being instilled in us since forever, we need reminders, in a perfect world we would think of something and it would appear infront of us, but because of society, so much resistance has been created that we need reminders to brake those barriers, those reminders come in methods. And that’s all they are.

Now since i showed you what doesn’t happen, let me show you what actually happens:

you thought of it ➯ it’s here ➯ remind yourself with a method (optional) ➯ stand firm (mandatory) ➯ your already real desire appears in the 3d as a mere byproduct, the cherry on top if you will.

you are “I AM” ➯ you set the intention to induce pure consciousness ➯ you affirm “I AM” to remind yourself (optional) ➯ you’ve induce pure consciousness, congrats

you are the operant power ➯ you decide you want that body, it’s not desired anymore it’s just how you look ➯ subliminal reminds you of that ➯ appears in the 3d as a side effect

So do not come here and say “I tried this method and it failed me”, no. that’s just not possible. You failed to remind yourself and you wavered. Nothing to do with a lifeless method.

Let’s say you want to go to a certain destination? The method isn’t the car driving you there, it doesn’t help you get there, it doesn’t help you get anywhere. Because guess what? you were already at your dream destination, the method just helps you remember even when circumstances shows that your still in the unfavourable destination.

so please stop scrolling endlessly for the “best method”, because there is no method that objectively works better than the other, however there may be methods that help you stand a lot firmer. But you need to remember it’s individual, just because you saw a girl who did affirmations and got her dream life in a week doesn’t mean that will help you stand firm better, visualisation may help you achieve the favourable mindset a lot easier and quicker than a subliminal, everyone is different.

And that is why, you don’t need methods, when bloggers say “all you need is yourself” we’re not tryna give you some sappy motivation, it’s truth. You don’t need any method, at all.

☄️🐋 Methods are the reminder, not the booster or the helper… 💋

[ittybittyfanblog]

Error 404: (Self-Aware!AU, Sylus Edition) – Pt. 3

Summary: A LADS self-aware!AU featuring Sylus and a (now skeptical!) player. That’s it, that’s the plot. A/N: I’ve already outlined the entire thing–now it’s just a matter of writing it, so don’t worry! Even if some chapters take me longer to update, I’m gonna finish this one way or another. Promise. *fingers crossed* Tags: player!reader x sylus, fem!reader x sylus, reader x lads, self-aware!au, strong language, reader thinks she’s losing her marbles because of a certain someone

Pt. 1 - Pt. 2 - Pt. 3

“Alright—okay, don’t be stupid,” You chant to yourself as you pace restlessly from the kitchen area of your studio, to the coffee table where you’ve set your phone lying facedown. “Just open the damn thing.” 

You’ve just arrived back at the condo a little past seven PM after a, frankly, productive–if not slightly distracted–day of running errands. You’re home, and you haven’t even got to unpacking the two paper bags (and a box) worth of groceries that were all but thrown carelessly on the kitchen counter, and already, you’re back to stressing over all the weird shit that's been happening lately.

Throughout the afternoon, you tried your hardest to resist the urge to check your phone, especially whenever you see the screen light up–whether it was in your hand or stashed away in your half-zipped fanny pack.

It’s at the most random times too, but always when you act on your unfortunate tendency to monologue your thoughts out loud. 

Sure, it could just be some random push app notifications. Text messages from the few people that hit you up on the weekends–invitations to hang out, maybe. A few newsletters you forgot to unsubscribe from, if you’re unlucky. 

But you think the timing’s far too deliberate to be purely coincidental. 

“Do I get a dozen eggs or just half? What do I even need a dozen for?” (Phone vibrates)

“Oh, hey, Indomie’s on sale if you buy in bulk. How much for a box?” (Screen flashes. Twice.)

“Who the hell is holding up the line, damn–oh, it’s an old lady. Better hurry the fuck up, grandma.” (Screen flashes) “...Sorry! I didn’t mean that.” 

“Ughhh… my tummy hurty…” (Phone vibrates) “What—” 

“Everything’s perfectly normal. Just your average, sunny Saturday! You are an independent, capable adult… who’s fucking losing it.” (Screen flashes–after a minute interval) 

Of course, you have an inkling as to what’s–or who’s–blowing your phone up; in fact, he’s never left your mind since this morning.

So presently, you’re in the middle of having a small existential crisis over what that means, for you and your sanity. No big deal. 

You puff out your cheeks for a couple of seconds before letting out a deep breath. Don’t be a pussy. I’m sure there’s a logical explanation to all of this. You’re–you’re not crazy. 

Landing heavily down in front of the low table, you finally grab your phone, hand shaking with the teensiest amount of trepidation. Not giving yourself any more time to think and second-guess, you flip it over, switching it back to Ring mode as you swipe up to see—

—a barrage of notifications; one popping up after another. 

Some of them are what you’ve expected: plain, old push notifications from banking apps, others from varying socials. There’s one from your mom. A reminder to email her the flight tickets you still haven’t gotten around to booking yet. 

And. Six banner notifications from the game. From… from–him. It’s something you’ve already braced yourself for. It doesn’t prepare you, however, for what they actually said. 

A knot grows in your chest, spreading rapidly like slithering twine as your mind tries, and somewhat fails, to make sense of what your eyes are seeing. 

Grab a dozen, sweetie. It won’t add much to the total cost, and you need that protein every morning. Cereal’s not gonna cut it. 

You really ought to lessen your sodium intake, kitten. (and) Do NOT get the box. Stop. 

Haha. A feisty one, aren’t you? 

Mmm, poor baby.

I– we can talk about this later when you get home.

Each notification contains a completely unique dialogue you’ve never seen before. A play-by-play commentary specifically in response to you— to your personal remarks from earlier, spoken out loud— that there is absolutely no way anyone could still pass it off as simply being system-generated. 

A faint ringing echoes in your ears as you slowly draw back, putting some distance between the onslaught of text and… you. You can’t seem to tear your gaze away from the screen, though. Even if the back of your head bumps against the seat edge of the sofa behind you from how far you’ve already leaned back. 

Blinking in stunned silence, the only thing you could croak out is a strained “what the fuuuck.” 

... Ping!

Still mustering the courage to face me? Don’t keep me in suspense, darling. 

The sudden message jolts you back to reality. You suck in a deep breath.

… Despite everything, you can’t help but find his nonchalant response to your gradual spiral into hysterics–because he knows–a little amusing. Also rude. But mostly funny. 

(It’s also probably just your brain’s last-ditch effort to find some semblance of control, but whatever.)

At this point, you know that you’re merely delaying the inevitable. Swallowing, you press on one of Sylus’ messages and it immediately boots up the game. 

Instead of soothing your nerves like it usually does, the orchestral background music from the loading screen puts you more on edge; your anxiety builds up to a crescendo, harmonious to the heralding of what you know will undoubtedly change the trajectory of your life. 

Dramatic, but true. 

48%... 82%... 98%...

There’s a hollow drop in your stomach when the screen–finally–reveals the familiar sight of the café. The golden ambient light enters your field of vision for a split second before your eyes flit reflexively to the man standing in the middle of the screen, whose presence commandeered your full attention.

He’s wearing his motorcycle jacket–the black one with the red and white thorn(?) accents, paired along the pair of leather pants with the iconic double zipper. Aside from the black zircon studs, he’s not wearing anything out of the ordinary. Nothing is looking out of the ordinary, actually. 

Holding your breath, you wait for the other shoe to drop. 

“Are you waiting for me to say hello? Then–” Sylus muses with an amused lilt to his voice, sauntering closer to flick “my” forehead. There’s a beat before he continues: “That’s my way of saying hello.” 

… Huh? 

That’s—this isn’t how it’s supposed to go. You… you don’t know what you were expecting, but this wasn’t it.

The man in front of you doesn’t look any different from how he usually does; the way that his… character animation (Should you call it that? It doesn’t seem right, given the circumstance, but you don’t know how best to describe anything anymore) flows is so–-so infuriatingly… normal. As if it’s just like any other day that you’ve logged in the game. 

Where did the sentience go? Why is he reciting lines he’s programmed to say? None of it adds up.

Your mouth tries to form words, but nothing comes out. With wide eyes, you helplessly gape at him. Speechless. For a moment, you feel like you’ve actually gone mad. 

A small “what’s happening?” slips past your lips. Your eyes dart across his face, trying to analyze every microexpression, any hint of sentience on him–in his eyes, in his movements. 

You find none. 

Mechanically, you exit the game.

“What the actual fuck?” You whisper-shout at nothing in particular, and maybe to the biggest cause of your current disconcertion; one who you thought… Who you were sure was—

-

-

Fuck it. It’s time to put your detective skills to work.

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

Unfortunately I think the root of so much OFMD discourse is that OFMD is a show that is not subtle but also does not talk down to viewers like they're stupid. The show has clear and cohesive themes (what we're taught about being a man is wrong, building queer community, the journey of learning to live authentically, etc.) but it expects you to keep up. This is great and I wish more shows did it. Even though OFMD is about as subtle as a brick through your window, and if it's trying to tell you something you will know, it always feels as if it is engaging in discussion with the viewer and introducing us to its themes, allowing us to put together the pieces as we go rather than holding our hands.

And yeah honestly it feels a lot of the time that people just didn't do that and have been making up their own show instead of engaging with this one lmao. And that's how we still get discourse that, like, gets mad at us for saying Izzy is a side character who had an atagonistic role like that's somehow controversial instead of just. what happened in the show. and people who enjoy the show as written might not want to treat fanon as canon. There is such a thing as actively reading against the text and the problem with all the discourse that remains most persistent in this fandom is that it's always something like "Ed and/or Stede actually suck and are awful" and it doesn't understand it's actively reading against the text with that take. Like yeah every good story has many different interpretations but there is a difference between "interpretation that is actually rooted in what the show is trying to do and say" and "shit you are making up to justify disliking the main characters"

[numathehusky]

🌱 My first was surprisingly Gumball from TAWOG! I’m not sure what my middle school self saw in him but whatever.

🥀 I just sometimes believe I am not up to their standards, plus, I am okay with just two F/Os. I’m sure they know I have a crush on them.

🎉 Surprisingly, I believe back when DDLC first released, I think I had more of a connection to Monika than the others. At the time, I did not know what lesbianism was, and I thought it was wrong to be someone of the same sex.

📦 Alastor. This selfship lasted for years, I think during my entire highschool years. It was unfortunately ruined by my abusive ex who is gone now. I just see Alastor as a best friend now, I never really stopped liking him honestly.

📸 This was fun to do!

🎵 I got a whole playlist dedicated to my selfship, but heres my top 3.

- 🤍 - DJ Khaled - I’m the One ft. Justin Bieber, Chance the Rapper, Lil Wayne

- 🤍 - La Bersuit - Un pacto para vivir

- 🤍 - Modern Talking - You’re my heart, You’re my soul

📝 This my favorite art piece I did for her!

💟 As much as I’m embarassed to tell her, I find her adorable in cat ears and paws.

💭 I’ve seen people headcanon that Monika can also play guitar, not only piano. I do think the guitar is very fitting for her.

💢 Monika is one of the most valid hopeless romantics ever.

🚩 Sometimes she’s a little bit controlling. As much as I sort of like it, it’s something me and her have been working on together.

💌 She actually confessed first, at the end of the game (DDLC) in the spaceroom. Throughout the game, I had developed feelings, and I did not know she was having the same feelings till the end.

💗 She said it first, but it shouldve been me, I would have said it 100 times more.

🌺 We sometimes spoon, but we mostly just hug each other. I snuggle into her as she pets me till I fully fall asleep. I also hug a plushie of her too for extra comfort.

🛀 Sometimes at the couch, I’d be arting on my tablet while she reads a book or two. Sometimes I secretly look at her reading and ask what shes reading so far. She info dumps to me.

🎀 Uh- HER ADORABLE WHITE RIBBON BOW HELLO??

🎠 She has a very caring side to her. The most sweetest personality you can think of. It’s like she always knows what’s up with me. It’s a little scary she can read my body language and face like a book.

🎡 I think us going to buy milkshakes and sitting together in a comfty cabin while it’s raining hard is the best date scenario ever. After we’re done with the shakes, we’d cuddle!

💚 I do get a bit jelly when she pets a dog she sees, i sometimes puff my cheeks and cross my arms a bit. I know we’re in public and I am kind of shy for PDA, but I love headpats, and I can’t help seeing someone else recieving it and get jealous.

🎇 Ya’ll are going to kill me.. Monika x Spacecore.

♨️ They don’t know about it yet, but I’m assuming Rainbow Dash would definitly tease me about it, but Alastor and Kai Lan would be accepting and proud of me for being in a healthy relationship.

🔒 It’s more so Alastor that’s protective of me. Since he’s my bestest friend and my ex, he wouldn’t want to see me go into a depression if something went wrong with my relationship.

✩ sleepover inspired selfship asks! ✩

send one or more emoji's alongside a fandom or specific f/o! (if applicable)

🌱 Who was your first F/O?

🥀 Talk about some of your fictional crushes and why they aren’t your F/O!

🎉 Tell us some fun facts about your newest selfship!

📦 Who are some F/Os you no longer ship with? Why?

📸 Make a moodboard for you and your F/O!

🎵 List three songs that remind you of your selfship.

📝 Give us a piece of a WIP involving your F/O (writing, art, etc.)

💟 Give us an embarrassing/secret headcanon you have about your F/O!

🧾 What’s your favorite headcanon someone else has made about your F/O?

💭 What’s your favorite uncommon headcanon about your F/O?

💢 What’s an unpopular opinion you have regarding your F/O?

🚩 What are some of your F/O’s flaws? Any red flags?

💌 How did you/your F/O confess your feelings to one another?

💗When did your F/O first say ‘I love you?’

🌺 How do you and your F/O cuddle?

🛀 What’s your favorite mundane thing to do with your F/O?

🎀 What’s your favorite thing about your F/O’s appearance?

🎠 What’s your favorite thing about your F/O’s personality?

🎡 What’s your dream date to go on with your F/O?

💚 Who are you most jealous of when it comes to your F/O?

🌠 What’s a crack selfship that you’ve thought of?

🎇 Which is the most CURSED crack selfship you’ve thought of?

♨️Did your platonic F/Os tease you about your feelings for your romantic F/O?

🔒 What does your platonic F/O think about your F/O? Are they overprotective of you?

🍦 What do any familiar F/Os think about your romantic F/O?

proshippers dni - this isn't for you ✩

[o3o-lapd-o3o]

okay! part 4 is here! still no dinner scene but hey, who doesn't like a telemachus and athena moment? huh? huh?

the post/thread that started this whole au

dinner scene: part 1 | part 2 | part 3

*later that day* *telemachus walking around the palace ground and speaking with athena about poseidon & also tomorrows family dinner*

telemachus: so, you said lord poseidon is your uncle, right?

athena: *under her breath to herself* unfortunately

athena: *to telemachus this time* he is indeed my father’s brother.

telemachus: what does he like? what’s his favourite food? does eat with you and the other gods on olympus?

athena: *not expecting to play 40 questions about poseidon*

athena: HU- *coughs* why do you want to know? i thought you studied the gods when you were younger?

telemachus: i mean yeah, but those are other people’s words. what better way than to ask his actual family?

athena: *regretting this conversation, but answers because it is telemachus asking*

athena: if you are looking to strike a conversation with him, i can say for certain he will be interested in anything about his kingdom, the sea.

athena: as for food, i’m sure you know we gods, do not require mortal food for sustenance.

telemachus: *confused and stops walking*

telemachus: *turns and looks up at athena* but you ate breakfast this morning with us? and other meals?

athena: *stops walking also and laughs a little at his confused face*

athena: *ruffles telemachus’ hair* yes i did. we can find it enjoyable, whether it be an offering, during a feast or with…

athena: *stops ruffling his hair & smiles warmly at telemachus* family.

telemachus: *smiles*

telemachus: *continues walking*

athena: *continues with him*

telemachus: so, you still never said what his favourite food was?

athena: *shrugs* i don’t know, fish?

telemachus: *laughs* well we certainly have plenty of that!

*both continue talking and walking together*

*a short while later*

telemachus: ok so even though he does have a place to live on olympus, he doesn’t live there? how come?

athena: the sea is his domain, i would expect he feels more comfortable being always part of it. he knows everything that is happening on and in it then.

athena: also, i’m sure that having my father be king of the gods while also being his younger brother, is not something he would personally want to be around all the time.

athena: i think if it were my younger brother…

athena: *imagines ares as king of the gods* *shakes the thought immediately away*

athena: *waves hand in front of her in dismissal* never mind that thought.

telemachus: *eyebrow raised in confusion* uh ok.

athena: as i was saying, my father, while he is a great & wise king of us gods, occasionally having to sometimes deal with his...

athena: *thinks to the lighting shaped scars on her face and body*

athena: …games, does not always end up good for those who play them.

telemachus:

telemachus: so, he just prefers living in his palace under the sea basically?

athena: pretty much, yeah.

athena: maybe you could save some more of your questions for my uncle at dinner tomorrow?

athena: trust me, i’m sure he’d love to talk about himself.

telemachus: yeah, i’ve got so much to ask him!

telemachus: not just about himself, but how he and my father came to be such good friends!

athena: *laughing to herself as she knows the truth of said friendship*

athena: oh i too would like to know…

athena: *has a thought* little wolf, you’re helping your mother and the palace servants plan everything for tomorrow, correct?

telemachus: yeah i am!

telemachus: actually, i probably should go and find mother to discuss things.

athena: *gently holds his arm before he can run off* before you go, i believe it would be best if we sat your father and my uncle right next to each other don’t you think?

athena: i normally know your mother and father would sit together as king and queen, but this is a family dinner, is it not?

athena: *grins* friends should be with friends.

telemachus: *holds hand up for a high five* that sounds like a great idea athena! that means you’re next to me, right?

athena: *hive fives and then smiles at telemachus* of course.

telemachus: *smiling back* okay, i’ll go and let mother know!

telemachus: *waves before heading into the palace* bye ‘thena!

athena: *waves back* goodbye telemachus.

athena: *now to herself* oh tomorrow will be fun indeed.

[a-dragons-journal]

I want to engage in otherkin/therian spaces but i often find that i feel woefully uninformed and don't understand the nuances of this community and I have seen a lot of vicious backlash for people having "wrong" opinions on things. I am uneducated and wish to be educated and my typical method is to just interact with people and come to my own conclusions but in this instance i cant quite tell where I should be looking. I fear if i have "too hot of a take" i will end up ostracized because I've seen it so often before. I don't really know what I'm asking...advice i guess? I'm just frustrated and genuinely don't really have anywhere else to express this.

Honestly, my advice is do it anyway, do your best, and if people bite you for doing your best instead of politely and kindly engaging with and educating you, block 'em.

The otherkin community, and the alterhuman communities as a whole, are unfortunately on a bit of a collective hair trigger right now regarding misinformation, mostly because of how prevalent the "kinning for fun" problem has become and therefore how many people turn around and tell us we're "taking it too seriously" or "you ACTUALLY think you're an animal??? wow lol delulu much??" (or my personal favorite real phrase I've seen, "otherkin are ruining kinning"). We can be a little bitey because of it, sometimes toward people who don't deserve it, and I'm sorry for that. I've been guilty of it at minimum as an internal and/or private reaction too, though I try to control it and remain kind or at minimum polite in public/when actually talking to the people in question. But it's my hope that if someone is clearly doing their best we can still be polite and kind when talking to them, and if a group of people can't or isn't interested in doing that, block 'em and go to the next one. There's always more of us out there.

[lov3-from-loserlane]

Qiu Lin character/enneagram analysis

@onelastskip thank you so much for the request!

I did have every intention of making this write up, sorry it took so long!! Unfortunately a lot of my hard ““evidence”” comes from beta and other patreon exclusive content, but I can absolutely write a more generalized and theoretical response about Qiu’s enneagram. And I literally just replayed the prologue yesterday so it is freshhh.

(I also love the enneagram, I prefer it over MBTI. Great minds think alike ;) )

And if you’re a newbie to the enneagram, don’t worry! I’ll be thorough with my explanations, so you should be able to follow along. Verrrrrry thorough hahahhaah. This post is literally over 2k words.

But! Just think about this as a general character analysis through the lense of the enneagram. It’ll be at least kind of interesting and fun, I promiseeee 😉🤞

So, anyway, let’s get started then.

I typed Qiu as a 3w2 sx/so

So what does this mean?

I believe that Qiu is an enneagram 3 with a 2 wing. The instinctual variants for their enneagram being sx and so. I’ll explain what that all means later on, but we’ll start with just about the basic description of the enneagram.

Enneagram 3 Description

The Enneagram is a personality theory that aims to describe the most vulnerable parts of ourselves, our hopes, our fears, our motivations, and potentially our trauma. It’s how we see the world and make sense of our emotions.

So then, what does it mean to be an enneagram 3?

Well, 3s in their most basic form, can be understood this way:

The enneagram 3 is defined by their need to differentiate themselves from other people through their accomplishments and can appear incredibly ambitious and goal oriented. 3s like to keep themselves busy, and their schedules are usually jam-packed with things to do. They’re very charismatic and acutely aware of the correct polite conduct. They make it a point to make good first impressions. 3s do not believe that they are inherently worthy of being loved, however, and that being loved comes as a result of what they can achieve. 3s fear their own irrelevancy, and are driven by a need for attention and admiration.

I’m sure you noticed that some of that description does fit Qiu! However, there’s a lot that *doesn’t* which probably stood out, and needs to addressed.

Like, what’s this about being super goal-oriented, ambitious, and needing to be successful? Nothing about Qiu, from what we’ve seen, proves that to be true about them.

Those of you who know the enneagram may even be thinking, “well, what about enneagram 2? They’re also people oriented, want to be liked and appreciated, and then we don’t have to worry about the fact that Qiu doesn’t seem necessarily ambitious or goal-oriented on being successful.”

Well, I kinda mislead you there. Because I think Qiu is very ambitious and goal-oriented, just not in the way we traditionally think about these concepts. Usually we think a person with these traits aims to someday have a high paying job, invent something new, do something genius that’ll get them celebrated worldwide or accumulate a comfortable amount of wealth. Which doesn’t sound like Qiu at all. But that’s not the only way this desire can be exhibited.

Instinctual Variants:

Thats where the instinctual variants of the enneagram come in. Instinctual variants are basically just subtypes of the enneagram, different ways in which the same enneagram can be presented. And it’s a part of enneagram that is relatively more unknown, but can actually be a huge help in figuring out which enneagram applies to you/a character. (So if you’re into enneagram at all, I recommend checking them out! Fair warning: the instinctual variants can really delve into the worst possible version of your psyche in a lot of cases, so be prepared for that. Be honest with yourself.)

Anyway, the instinctual variants are abbreviated as “sx”, “so”, and “sp”. These stand for “sexual”, “social”, and “self-preserving”, respectively.

I typed Qiu as a sexual 3. NOW CHILL cause before you come at me “sexual” doesn’t LITERALLY mean sexual, sexuality, sex, etc. I mean in some cases it can definitely be related, but it does not mean that inherently. And that’s not what I’m gonna be talking about with Qiu like at all. I don’t know why they called it that, I didn’t make it up. I just read about it and then apply it to fictional characters in my tumblr posts 😪

But anyway, the sx 3 can often times not look like a traditional 3, which would make Qiu a little difficult to type as a 3 initially. But once you get into the description of the sx 3, it starts to become more clear.

Sx 3s aren’t so much focused on making achievements in the real world so much as they are on pleasing others and creating an appealing image around themselves. They extract feelings of accomplishment from the happiness and success of the people around themselves. Unlike other 3s, sx 3s aim to connect to others mentally through supporting them. They expend much of their energy for the sake of other people, and they’re hardworking and ambitious in this way. They don’t necessarily feel the need for tangible achievement like other 3s. They love, admiration, and desire of others is enough for them. They are unconventional achievers in this way. Sexual 3s have a very community driven mentality, where they’re always looking out for the greater good of the whole team.

They can also often times feel the need to play into the role of an easily digestible feminine or masculine image, depending on how they were assigned at birth 😳 Whichhhh I want to yank a quote from the beta moment “fancy fun” for this so bad. But you’re just gonna have to guess what I’m talking about if you played it. And if you haven’t, I’m sorry 😔‼️ but I do feel like this point can be somewhat inferred from the demo, if only abstract based on how Qiu conducts themself.

Now, the enneagram 2’s flavor of wanting to be “likeable” isn’t necessarily rooted in being admired and looked up to. In a lot of ways, it’s the opposite. The enneagram 2 wants to be useful and needed by others. Qiu may feel like they are useful and that they are needed, but that’s not necessarily what they’re looking for. Qiu at the end of the day just wants for people think they’re cool and kind and the best friend ever. Which is why I don’t think they are a 2, they simply have a 2 wing. (The wing just being another thing that indicates what way the enneagram presents itself).

So yeah, I think sx 3 is the perfect fit for Qiu. Because while they don’t necessarily need to be revered for any personal accomplishments, (only rarely taking the opportunity to brag, and if they do it’s played off more or less as a joke) they do however have this intense need to be liked as a person and looked up to for that reason.

Childhood Wound:

Another way we can infer somebody’s enneagram would be based on their “childhood wound.” In enneagram, this would be the root of where this person’s enneagram would come from. Meaning yes, a person’s enneagram is established during their childhood years and does not change.

The childhood wound of the enneagram 3 is as follows:

(Screenshotted from a deleted user on Reddit)

Based on some information given in the QnAs on patreon, we can infer that this is true of Qiu’s childhood. But I also believe it can be inferred by public content as well.

Based on how Qiu conducts themself, I don’t think kids in Golden Grove ever really appreciated Qiu for being Qiu. People liked them because they were expending themselves for the sake of others, trying their best to include everybody and putting on this “act” of being cool about everything. They actively minimize their own needs/boundaries while being hyper aware of everyone else’s. This made them likable, which made them popular, which made them a high commodity to their classmates.

We also kind of get this in the explanation for Baxter’s crush on Qiu. Baxter could have liked Qiu genuinely, I’m not discounting that at all, after all he was one of their closest friends in childhood. However, the way he goes about rationalizing it to himself is this:

(Screenshotted from the GBPatch tumblr)

“You’re popular, so why shouldn’t I like you.” And it’s safe to assume a lot of other people felt the same way about Qiu, whether it be related to a crush or completely platonically. It was this sort of self fulfilling prophecy where Qiu tried their best to live up to the expectations of others, which made them even more desirable to people, which made them feel they had to become subservient to these expectations, which made people want them all the more. And in a way, they themselves kinda wanted that. They actively seek out that kind of attention and feel fulfilled when it’s received. But not to this extreme of a point, as we can see in Step 2.

What about Step 2?!:

That brings us to one glaring problem some may already be considering. Qiu’s personality in Step 2. It seems to have taken a complete 180 from how they were in Step 1.

In Step 2, the last thing Qiu wants is attention or to be around people at all. They could seemingly care less if they’re liked which can be observed in how they treat Tamarack’s concerns about their litter in the current Step 2 preview. They straight up disregard her feelings completely, and not politely. Qiu really just wants to hide away from it all and not be bothered. And if the enneagram is developed during childhood and then never changes, wouldn’t it be better to find something that also encompasses that side of them? Maybe they’re not a 3, or even a 2!

Weeeeeell ackshually ☝️🤓, I think enneagram 3 is still very applicable to Step 2 Qiu, but there’s not much I can say about that *definitively* at the moment.

However, we do have this description of Step 3 Qiu to work off of:

(Screenshotted from the GBPatch tumblr)

So obviously, Qiu’s presentation in Step 2 isn’t all that it seems. Qiu is actively *going against* their true nature during Step 2 for one reason or another. My best guess would have to be that they feel they previously let their identity rely too heavily on the needs of the people around them, and that notion freaks them out. So even if, in a way, their true identity DOES revolve around what they can be for others, they also want to make sure there’s a real, individual, person in there somewhere. Maybe in a twisted and fucked up way you can suggest that it is in fact because our culture heavily celebrates and looks up to that kind of individuality. Like, we as a society can consider it an admirable quality to be an outcast for the things that make us unique. That could potentially be added motivation. But thatssssssss really pushing it kind of and I’m talking out of my ass a little bit. So I’ll leave it there. 🥱

Either way, we can conclude that in Step 2 Qiu is not at all a “completely different person,” I don’t really think that’s even possible, and tbh I hope people don’t believe that about them. But I do think that they are actively *trying* to be. Which is sooooo 3, in a way (I sound like an astrology girl heheh >:3) But yeah, as a young teen, you think you know you want a lot of things. And then when you grow up, you realize that’s not what you actually wanted in the first place.

Side tangent, this is also why I loveee the idea of playing the game with jealousy/envy turned on for Qiu. I just feel like it’s so natural to their arc, but that’s just my own personal interpretation/preference.

But anyway, that’s how I came to my conclusion, Qiu is an enneagram 3w2!

Conclusion:

Let me once again reiterate that this is literally pseudoscience, so there isn’t an end all be all. You could totally think I was wrong and have your own ideas, and we could all totally be wrong and right and the same time together. I just do this stuff for fun, cause I think it’s cool and interesting and helps me better understand both my favorite characters in fiction and the viewpoints of people completely different from me ^_^

If you read this, I honestly CANNOT thank you enough, seriously. Because wow this post was crazy and long and insane and insanely crazy long. And I feel like I’m really bad and disorganized when it comes to explaining things. But I appreciate it if you did take an interest! I hope you were entertained and learned something new.

Qiu was specifically requested, and this post is long enough as it is. And that’s without all the beta and patreon stuff, which then we could be here for hours getting into the nitty gritty details. But anyway, I would love to do a separate analysis on Tamarack’s enneagram next. Though spoiler alert, her’s will be a lot moreeeee theoretical and hard to explain T~T I’m sure that would be super fun for me to attempt though HAHA. So if you’d be interested in that, let me know! And if you wouldn’t, too bad because I’ll probably do it anyway!

(PS. I tried to make sure not to give away anything directly related to content only included in the patreon. But, if I made a mistake, please let me know and I will edit it out of the post immediately!)

My references:

[softness-and-shattering]

Oh, yeah, of course. No one with a stake in the patriarchy says "oh you're a guy actually? Sweet, lets get you set up with those privileges". They say "you're delusional and I will force you back into your place of servitude, little girl". Transmascs arent a win for the patriarchy, we're all gender traitors, all trans people are. To posit otherwise its actually ludicrous. Those macho guys have 'hard-won' their place as manly man safe from ridicule, they're not welcoming anyone into that club, its exclusive.

And Im starting to feel like I need to caveat these posts with, we're talking about a certain type of person. Unfortunately there are many of them, but they aren't all of humanity. We have allies, and we have people who dont care either way. Not every single cis person alive is incredibly dangerous. Obviously some are and obviously we have to be careful. I just also dont want to be spreading an idea that we're fucked and its all doom and gloom. We have each other, and we have allies and supporters and neutral people. We have spaces where its safe, or more safe than other places. When we're talking about this its more in the extremes, we're talking broadly about people in general, usually people who lean more asshole and bigot, more patriarchal and white supremacist. That isnt everyone I dont want to terrify anyone.

I’ve said it before + it’s becoming true again this time. Whenever I’m alone (i.e., without a boyfriend) my crossdressing becomes more serious + constant. In my search for the perfect male companion, I find myself. In my need for a man in my bed, I detach myself from my body and my body becomes his; I stroke his hair, I see his wrist. I feel the warm winds blowing my open shirt from my smooth, hard, flat chest. I catch the hungry eyes of another beautiful youngman. I reconsider male hormones—trying to remember why I decided against them before.

— We Both Laughed In Pleasure: The Selected Diaries of Lou Sullivan

[drakorn]

Rewriting Veilguard Part 1 - The World State

Disclaimer: I don't hate the game, I actually think it's quite great given the development hell Bioware went through in those 10 years. This is more of a hypothetical universe where there was less of that behind the scenes drama. Just a fun writing exercise.

Expanding Veilguard's World State Editor

Like many of us, I was disappointed with the total amount of choices carrying over from past games being only three, one of which dealt with romance, two with decisions made in the Trespasser DLC, and all of them being from Inquisition. This already set the precedent that we shouldn’t really be expecting the game to be as connected to our unique Thedas as we have come to be used to from previous titles—no more uniquely flavoured codex entries, no more small but sweet cameos here and there that make the world itself feel like a larger place that we had helped shape.

Given The Veilguard’s very troubled production history of multiple delays, staff layoffs, and all-around restarts of the entire project, it is honestly a surprise that we even got three choices, so credit where credit is due. They made with what they had. But what if The Veilguard had this vision from the start? What if there wasn’t any of this meddling? What if Bioware simply had more time and control? What if they could truly let us import the World State this game deserved?

Now, for this hypothetical rewritten playthrough, I’m going off from the fact that the Dragon Age Keep will not be used; I actually found it a neat idea to tick my three choices in the character creator, and it would have probably been better had Inquisition done something similar. Why do I think that? Because it means we are not running into any dangers of servers potentially shutting down, leaving us trapped in the canon we happened to have imported last. Converting the Keep into an offline editor was a good idea, but unfortunately not executed nearly enough as, let’s face it, we all expected. So we’re gonna have some fun for Veilguard.

Disclaimer: I’m going to refer to the game’s title as Veilguard from now on, not “the” Veilguard. I really don’t like the change of having a “the” in a series of otherwise one-word, or one-number, titles.

Of course, we have to be realistic about this. It is virtually impossible to implement every single decision from across all three games, and those that can be implanted can’t alter the main plot too much. Certainly, we like to imagine and picture things, but let’s approach this from an actually doable point of view.

Right, so imagine you just finalised your Rook, and then get a screen titled “Past Adventures”. Not just “The Inquisition”. And it would take up the entire screen instead of being shoved somewhere in the corner of the final CC page, which many people missed. I could have missed it too, had I not known beforehand that it was going to be there!

It would say something akin to “You can customise the protagonists and several events from the games Dragon Age: Origins, Dragon Age II, and Dragon Age: Inquisition. These choices will have both major and minor effects on the plot of Veilguard. If this is your first Dragon Age title, you would be advised to skip this section for now, as you may otherwise risk getting overwhelmed. A default World State has been pre-generated for the game.”

Why did I add this disclaimer? Because it would show us, right from the get-go, that we respect both new and old players. If you’re a new player, feel free to skip this part as it won’t matter to you anyway and, quite frankly, you wouldn’t want to spend an eternity in the character creator doing things you might not even be familiar with. But if you’re a returning player or someone who has read up on recaps and watched countless lore videos, come on right in, we’ve got you covered, don’t worry! We know how much time you spent meticulously crafting your World State for Inquisition, so join us and customise to your heart’s content.

If you choose to not skip ahead (honestly the only time I would click “skip” on that shit is if I was a new player), you will be presented with three tarot cards, one shows the griffon, the Grey Warden symbol, one shows Kirkwall’s heraldry, and one shows the Inquisition’s banner. Here’s your previous three games. And now we get to customise them a little. The little gremlin in me would be quite gleefully rubbing his hands at this prospect.

Past Adventures: The Blight

We open the first slide and are immediately hit with a crimson screen and an ambient reprise of several of Inon Zur’s themes from DAO. I loved this part in the game, when you click to customise your Inquisitor and are immediately hit with “Calling the Inquisition”. Really great stuff for early emotions. Now let’s actually customise things.

The Hero of Ferelden

I do not expect us to actually be able to recreate the Warden in the flesh, but I believe they should be at least brought up in conversation or mentioned in codex entries and letters. Here are the things we get to customise about them specifically:

The Hero: Here, we get to tick the race, gender, class, and background for our Warden. Again, no character creator, just fancy tarot cards. But guess what? That would already be more than enough for what we can do. At least we know the game acknowledges their continued existence.

The Warden’s fate: Did the Hero of Ferelden perform the ultimate sacrifice?

Romance: Who did your Warden romance, if at all?

The Companions

Now that our Warden is set, we jump over to DAO’s companions. Each companion has their own little mini-section. The first few questions will always be “Did you even recruit them? And if so, did they survive? If so, were you on good terms or not?” These questions, depending on the answers, will immediately lock or open the more specific ones. Which are, as follows:

Did the Warden have Morrigan perform the Dark Ritual?

What is Alistair’s ultimate fate?

Was Sten reunited with his sword?

What happened to Loghain?

What happened to Marjorlaine?

The Battle of Ostagar

What happened to the prisoner at Ostagar?

The Arl of Redcliffe

What is Connor’s fate?

Is Isolde alive?

Did you help Bevin and return his sword?

The Urn of Sacred Ashes

What happened to the Urn?

The Nature of the Beast

How was the situation between the Dalish and the werewolves resolved?

A Paragon of Her Kind

What happened to the Anvil of the Void?

Who rules Orzammar?

Did the Warden help Brother Burkel create a Chantry in Orzammar?

Did the Warden prove the Legion of the Dead was connected to a noble house?

Did Orta join the Assembly?

Warden’s Keep

What happened to Sophia and Avernus?

Denerim

Did the Warden complete Slim Couldry’s crime wave?

Who rules Ferelden?

Who killed Urthemiel?

Awakening

What happened to Nathaniel?

What happened to the Architect?

What happened to Vigil’s Keep and Amaranthine?

As you can see, I have not included all the choices, just the ones I think can be carried over in both realistic and interesting manners. Not all of them will heavily feature in the game; in fact, many of them are for flavour and codex entries only, but there is still merit in those. We know there is a whole lot of stuff happening in the South thanks to the letters the Inquisitor regales us with. So let’s put some world-state uniqueness to those letters. But in this rewrite, some of these choices will, in fact, feature in a more substantial manner.

And that’s Dragon Age: Origins done! Moving on to the next one!

Past Adventures: The Tale of the Champion

When we enter this screen, the CC assumes Kirkwall’s orangey-yellow tone and we get a reprisal of the key DA2 themes by Inon Zur, the most prominent one being, of course, Hawke’s family theme. This one is not going to be as big as DAO, but there are a few important factors nevertheless, especially concerning possible deaths and survivals.

The Champion of Kirkwall

Unlike the Hero of Ferelden, Hawke will actually be customisable in this one. Because no matter whether or not they were sent to the Fade or Weisshaupt, there is always the potential for them to still be alive. So, here are the choices regarding Hawke:

The Champion: Here you can customise Hawke’s gender, class, and personality.

Who did Hawke romance, if at all?

The Party

Pretty much every companion’s card, aside from a few, will have the questions “Did you recruit them?”, “Are they still alive?”, and “Were they friend or rival to Hawke?” at the forefront. Most of it is gonna be flavour, but it’s still my flavour, dammit!

What happened to Bethany or Carver?

What happened to Isabela and the Tome of Koslun?

What happened to Fenris and Danarius?

What happened to Merrill, her eluvian, and Clan Sabrae?

What happened to Bartrand?

What happened to Anders when the Chantry exploded?

Did Hawke approve of Ander’s actions?

Did Aveline marry Donnic?

The Tale of the Champion

Did Hawke protect the Bone Pit from all its dangers?

What happened to Feynriel?

Did Hawke let Zevran go?

Did Nathaniel survive?

Did Hawke side with the mages or the templars?

Fewer choices are carrying over here compared to DAO, but many of the events that occurred in DA2 are only relevant to Kirkwall’s immediate fate, which is already resolved by the time of DAI. Many of these will be flavour again, but some of them, I’m not going to say which, will definitely have a bigger impact.

Right, we’re done with DA2, let’s move on to the last one!

Past Adventures: The Inquisition

And here we get to the big one, the game that most directly impacts much of DAV’s story. We click on the last page and get the green shades and DAI’s ambience themes, a beautiful reprisal of Trevor Morris’ great hits. I would like to once again reiterate how emotional the CC music made me feel here when I was playing the game. Let us now customise our choices.

The Inquisitor

While the Hero of Ferelden will be a background figure in letters and codex entries, and Hawke more of a minor character with a significant role, the Inquisitor will have a much larger presence. Just how large, you’ll find out soon. But for now, let’s customise them:

The Inquisitor: Here you can customise your Inquisitor’s race, gender, class, and specialisation. Their personality as well, for while it wasn’t as apparent as with Hawke, the Inquisitor does still have a distinct range of dialogue choices. You can still be diplomatic, lighthearted, or even rough.

Who did the Inquisitor romance, if at all?

The Inner Circle

As with the other companion sections, pretty much all slides here will feature the “Did you actually recruit them?”, “Are they still around?”, and “Are you friends or not?” questions. Alongside a few specific ones that will definitely have more of an impact here.

Did Dorian resolve the issue with his father?

What happened to Blackwall?

Did the Iron Bull remain loyal to the Qun?

Did Cassandra rebuild the Seekers of Truth?

Did Cassandra discover the book of secrets and what did she do with it?

What happened to Harmond?

Which path did Cole choose?

What happened to Solas’ friend?

Did Varric track down the red lyrium source?

Did the Inquisitor give Vivienne the heart of a snow wyvern?

How was Cullen’s lyrium dilemma resolved?

How did the Inquisitor help Josephine resolve her family’s fortunes?

Was Leliana hardened or softened?

The Path of the Inquisitor

Did the Inquisitor embrace or denounce their title of Herald of Andraste?

Did the Inquisition side with the mages or the templars?

What was the general principle upon which the Inquisition was founded?

Who rules Orlais?

Who stayed behind in the Fade?

What happened to the Grey Wardens after Adamant Fortress?

What happened to Samson or Calpernia?

Who drank from the Well of Sorrows?

Did the Inquisitor respect the rituals at the Temple of Mythal?

Who became Divine Victoria?

The Inquisition’s Influence

Did the Inquisitor ally with the Hinterland cultists?

Was the rift in Crestwood closed?

Was Caer Bronach captured?

Did the Inquisitor make a deal with Imshael?

Was Suledin Keep captured?

Was Griffon Wing Keep captured?

Was Sutherland’s company formed?

What tone did the Inquisitor’s judgments take?

Jaws of Hakkon

Did the Inquisitor learn Ameridan’s fate?

Was Hakkon slain?

Did the Inquisitor share the truth about Ameridan?

The Descent

Did the Inquisitor stop the earthquakes from destroying the Deep Roads?

Trespasser

What is the ultimate fate of the Inquisition?

What is the Inquisitor’s final goal regarding Solas?

Again, this looks like a lot, and it is, but bear in mind that a lot of these will only have minor impacts on the story in the form of cameos and codex entries. However, there are several major DAI choices that will have significant impact.

For our hypothetical rewrite, I shall not list every single choice I made for my imaginary playthrough. Instead, I shall reveal them as we go along so as not to clutter the space too much. And it’s a bit more fun this way.

And that’s the World State editor finally done! I believe all of these choices are able to feature in some capacity, be it big or small. But no matter if it’s a big world-changing consequence or simple flavour texts and cameos, it will still be our Thedas, our own unique version of it that we helped shape.

Now that the past is dealt with, let’s look at the present. Next time we’ll talk about Rook, the six factions, and why a DAO-style origin story selection would have not only been beneficial but very doable.

[randomfandomblabdom]

I think part of what's making the conversations around the casting choices in the live action HTTYD so annoying to me is that for me, it has nothing to do with any of the supposedly controversial casting and more to do with the fact the movie seems to be cherry-picking what it wants to carry directly from animation to live action.

We have to wait to see more but as of right now, it looks like a near shot-for-shot remake. I know the director, Dean Deblois, said it wouldn't be but he was also on record of saying he would never make a live action remake and called them lazy several years ago but here we are so forgive me if I don't completely take his word on that. They did their damnedest to make poor Gerard Butler look as much like animated Stoick as humanly possible even if it means it looks like he just walked out of a Spirit Halloween store. Hiccup looks pretty much identical to his animated counterpart including that late 2000s haircut. It appears that they tried their best to replicate set pieces and props from the animated film. They obviously didn't mess with Toothless's design in very obvious ways because he's so iconic that god knows that would've caused absolute chaos...etc.

But then you have characters who don't look a thing like their animated counterparts - not just regarding race but smaller details like hair color or their costumes - in a movie that already looks to be a direct remake of the animated film where other aspects of said animated film are being perfectly replicated (or at least they tried very hard to replicate them).

If they had decided to do something completely different with this live action adaptation and change up every character in some way, this would be a completely different conversation and frankly, none of it would matter but because they seem to be cherry-picking what is and is not a direct remake/replication from the animated film, suddenly the conversation needs to exist because if they're being so particular about Stoick and Hiccup and hell, even Tuffnut looks like a pretty accurate replication then you can't help but ask... well, then why isn't Fishlegs blonde? Why isn't Astrid blonde? Why is Snotlout dressed in bright fucking orange? Why didn't they cast actual identical twins?

They're picking and choosing and it's adding fuel to a fire that was completely avoidable if they'd just picked one side or the other. They could've gone the historical route, they could've said to hell with it and made it all completely different, or they could've made it exactly the same... instead, they've created this confusing mosh pit that frankly shouldn't even exist that is unfortunately going to spark this so-called nitpicking whether people like it or not because you cannot argue that hair color or costumes don't matter when so much of the rest of the film already looks identical to the animation.

[horce-divorce]

hiii we still just need $25 urgently, because we are OUT of the medication which keeps us both off of feeding tubes and out of the hospital

We have a little bit of money left, but not enough for a refill.

$25 is the bare minimum we need; $40 would be ideal-- but we NEED to go get some TODAY, and 25 is an easier goal to meet. so we will take absolutely whatever we can get. Even if you've only got 5 or 10 to spare that gets us a LOT closer than we were a minute prior 💖

Please reblog 🙏 I know everyone is struggling more and more, and this time of year is always especially tight, but a mere 25 bucks can literally help save the lives of 2 trans people right now and I'm not joking. I really wish I was.

my bday is on nov 15th!! 🎉 it would be ideal not to have to beg for my life for my bday gift, but alas, my bf and I are two homeless, disabled transmascs who have been trying to get back on our feet for over a year. especially in the shadow of the us election, our futures are very uncertain, but we are resolved to live + stay Out no matter what happens. theyre stuck here with us, too >:)

our short term goal is just to get enough $ to pay for meds and the phone bill, maybe $150- just enough to survive the month. I have a rare disorder that doctors refuse to treat, and my med regimen is just barely keeping me off a feeding tube and is ofc not covered by insurance

I don't have much on my WL right now, but being able to manage my pain would be nice <3 we live on less than $3 per person per day, so a little goes a long way for us!!! even $5 or $10 makes a huge difference!

[ 🫐 paypal ] will go further but we also have [ cshpp🐛 ] 💖✌️

[mxtxfanatic]

Just for the record, I actually don’t hate any mdzs character. Mxtx’s stories are so well-crafted that I love the roles that every character plays. I love the chills and digust that Jin Guangyao inspires in me. I loved the hatred that Xue Yang causes to flare up in me when I reread the Yi City arc. I love the amusement I get every time Jiang Cheng lives up to his failed-hero role, doubly so when I remember that he is also a failed-villain because Xue Yang is actually the better version of him lmao. I love dissecting Nie Mingjue’s hypocrisy in what it means when Wei Wuxian thinks of him as an “upholder of morality.” I love the pity that I feel for Lan Xichen such that I struggle to commit to how I view him just like how he struggles with how to view those he loves. And the complexity and diversity of each character’s life experiences and autonomous choices is the icing on the cake that makes fans’ (me included) obsessions over them wholly understandable.

What I hate is feeling coerced into liking a character how fandom wants me to like them, especially if the “evidence” supporting liking said character is just popular fanon that the fandom has taken as gospel truth. The more I feel pressured into ignoring a character’s canon personality to adopt a fanfic version of them whose only similarity is that they share a name, the harsher I want to be with my critique of them. Don’t give me morally righteous!Nie Mingjue who totally would’ve defended the Wen and I won’t give you hypocrite!Nie Mingjue who deserved to be cut into pieces, just not by the person who did it. Don’t give me best brother, best jiujiu!Jiang Cheng and I won’t give you pathetic manbaby!Jiang Cheng who deserved to have Wei Wuxian’s golden core removed from him the hard way for his ungratefulness and for his sister to come back to life to bitch slap him for how he treats her son. Don’t give me best bro wangxian shipper!Lan Xichen and I won’t give you morally weak!Lan Xichen who deserved every bit of the psychological torture Nie Huaisang put him through for his inability to truly stand by any of his brothers, biological or sworn.

Don’t give me some “everyone is secretly good with no flaws” bullshit and I won’t feel the need to balance it out by listing every single one of their sins and nailing it to the door like Martin Luther. I like these characters. Don’t turn me into a hater, cause if you think I’m mean now? Lol

[tinseltina]

trying to make fanart of leona from @kiame-sama's humans are extinct twst au (warning it is a yandere au and 18+ so minors DNI)

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

Okay challenge mode. You are a therapist and Eridan Ampora from Homestuck has just walked right out of his intro page into your office. How do you fix him?

put him and karkat in a room with a pile of stuff and tell them they can't leave until they've jumped into it and talked about their feelings

[vidavalor]

Aww, thank you for reading & for the kind words, @blackthorn-roses 💕 I hear you on The Final 15. The part that actually breaks me in a good way about the end of S2 isn't even that Aziraphale got into the elevator. It's the way their song in The Bentley and Crowley staying outside the car showed them both still fighting for their relationship.

It circles back to what we learn about what they're both working on back in season's first episode with the argument over Gabriel. Their interactions there show that these two (who already have the healthiness that is The Apology Dance) are continuing to work on getting better at arguments, which is the most married thing possible. They each have something they're working on with it that we can see in the argument.

Aziraphale says stuff he doesn't mean that he regrets when he's angry so he is trying to curb that. Crowley runs away in anger and is trying to get better at managing that. In reality, both of them are stuck in a difficult situation because it's hard to recover from trauma when you're still threatened with it but they're both actively trying and the dialogue suggests they've agreed to both work at these things and help one another with it. Crowley has that oh, so this is how you wanna do it, then? moment when Aziraphale is about to snap that is very much honey, you're about to do the thing, giving Aziraphale a moment to take a breath and use more productive words. Crowley winds up having to do The Apology Dance because he's the one who doesn't hold up his end and left during the argument but they both know that it's pretty understandable, given his PTSD and the situation triggering it. They approach each other's challenges with empathy and humor in The Apology Dance afterwards. This is all healthy and it's shown to be what they can do when they can communicate openly and privately, which is what is taken from them in The Final 15.

In The Final 15, they can't speak openly and, even then, they normally would have been able to manage that better than they did here but a series of unfortunate events pile up and cause them to misunderstand one another. It takes a whole bunch of things happening for that to even happen in the first place. Even if it seems like it's over, it's really not, because they refuse to stop fighting for each other. They both didn't do well in their disagreement in The Final 15 and did the things they have been trying not to but then they both turn around and try to show the other that they know that and make it as right as they can, right in the moment. Aziraphale has the car help him with the song to tell Crowley he loves him. Crowley went out the door but he stayed by the car, trying to live up to his promise to not leave. Through the last scenes, they're still trying with one another.

Those aren't the actions of people who got Ineffably Divorced. They're ones of people who love each other like crazy and don't want to lose one another. A series of outside events caused a lot of confusion and misunderstanding but they'll realize what's happened and sort it out. It's a sad ending for sure because they're both miserable at the end of it but there's more hope there than I think it gets credit for sometimes.

Just on the back of your last post about how Aziraphale and Crowley have been a couple for (literal) ages, of which you have me thoroughly convinced, there's one thing I've never been able to figure out.

In 1941, when Crowley saves the books, what are we seeing from Aziraphale? By this point he knows damned 😉 well that Crowley adores him, so I very much doubt the 'this is when Aziraphale realised his love was returned' theory. Is it to do with their holy water fight?

Apologies if you've covered this already but I've read through your master post and most of your previous posts and couldn't find anything. I keep musing on it and thinking 'oh Vidavalor will know but I shouldn't bother them'!

Ground Control to Mr. Tom! 😊 Hi there. 💕 You are correct that I haven't done a post about this, which feels very much like my all-over-the-place blog, because this is one of the most-discussed scenes in the show. 😂 You are absolutely not a bother! Do not speak such silliness. I'm going to explain my take on that scene with some help from The Archangel Fucking Gabriel. Therefore, there is hot chocolate, should you want a mug.😊

This is also going to be my contribution to the Azirafeast celebrations so I wish any of you reading this many scrumptious returns!

Below the cut is the one in which someone who thinks Crowley and Aziraphale have been lovers since ancient Rome offers an opinion on what's going on with Aziraphale and the books in 1941... by way of a look at what we might be able to learn about this moment from its sister moment in Gabriel & Beez's flashback.

Be them real people or fictional ones, angels-- especially our two, main ones on Good Omens-- are not accustomed to feeling seen.

This is largely because they believe they exist to sacrifice themselves for the protection and betterment of others... that this is literally what they were made by God to do... or at least what they've been told God wants them to do... and, as we know, they've got plenty of questions over all of that.

They can often feel guilty about their consumption of resources-- or their curiosity about doing so in different ways-- when they've been told that those resources and the experiences that come with them are not for them, even if all evidence seems to suggest that might not really be the case.

They are told they are supposed to live small lives of sacrifice and are, as a result, full of conflicts about their hungers, their needs, their desires... about their love, and the want of a free life of their own.

They exhibit perfectionist behaviors, are full of self-criticism, and are excessively self-sacrificing.

Intellectually, they know they are a person with wants and needs like everyone else but they've been taught that they are supposed to be above all of that and breaking free of that abuse comes with negative self-thoughts, anxiety, depression, and a whole slew of other fun struggles.

That attempted thought control and oppression of people that is responsible for these angels' inner torment, though? As The Supreme Archangel aptly puts it while having a total breakdown shown by chasing his metaphorical self (The Fly) around the bookshop and trying to kill it with a Bible...

...it never works.

It might, unfortunately, get some people but it never, ultimately, works in society as a whole for very long because people want to live. People are made to live. They will seek out coffee over death and rebel against any society that seeks to oppress them in whatever way that they can. Eventually, angels who want to break free will find different ways of letting themselves be individuals on their own terms, even as they are still full of conflict about it, as we've seen Aziraphale and Gabriel do throughout the story.

They'll express themselves in different ways but with the same sense of desperation to have something of their own as a way of admitting that they are a person, too.

Maybe, one night, an angel will, say, allow himself to indulge his hungers by eating an entire ox... maybe in front of the demon he'd like to consume with just as much enthusiasm. Maybe those hungers become ones that, despite his inner conflicts that lead to periodic episodes of depression and fasting, this angel will allow himself to otherwise regularly satiate, and in which he finds enjoyment, nourishment, connection and peace, that he would not have otherwise found.

Maybe, on another night, a different angel will let himself slip away from Heaven and return having consumed resources for himself, in the form of a tailor-made suit that serves as proof to himself that he isn't just a symbol but an individual person in his own right. Maybe it gives him a connection to his body that also leads to him jogging and exploring more of the world. Maybe he allows himself the freedom of owning what he can of his own body and own appearance because control over these things have otherwise been taken from him in the process of denying his personhood and making him more of a symbol to be venerated.

While these are good examples of these two angels finding different but similar, healthy paths to recognizing themselves as people, it's one thing to recognize yourself but another thing for someone else to recognize you.

Angels are wonderful at taking care of everyone else but they sometimes have a blind spot when it comes to their own needs and safety. They are so busy taking care of everyone else that they are prone to making mistakes with their own care.

Such as this angel below being so pleased with an opportunity to contribute to the war effort that he missed that he'd accidentally let himself be recruited by the wrong side...

...and needing his partner to identify some Nazis and redirect some bombs to keep him from being discorporated...

...and such as this other angel below being pleased with his ability to show care towards his new partner...

...but also, as we can see by the expression in his reaction to Beez's suggestion above, so unused to being cared for that, even if he was intellectually aware of it, the aspect of partnership involving mutual care was so foreign to him that it threw him for a bit of a loop.

Sometimes, an angel will be going through a period of struggle when it comes to their interactions with the world. It's often times not even just the feeling that they should just be advisors more than active participants and that the world is not for them. They are, in these moments, just imposter syndrome run amok, and that robs them of pursuing that which makes them feel happy and fulfilled.

Loving an angel in this mode requires gentle, genuine, affirming care:

The imposter syndrome modes can strike at any time for angels but tend to do so especially when they've very recently tried to engage with the world in a big way and saw it backfire.

Like when they spend a lot of time trying to sort out their place in the world and regularly go back and forth between being so influential that they personally own and have developed an entire city neighborhood but also then have days when they don't want to open their own bookshop to the world.

Like when they are supposed to be an angel and nothing else but, if they could choose a vocation, they'd be doing card tricks and pulling rabbits out of hats at birthday parties for all of eternity, and they feel so massively guilty about it that they tell themselves that the magic shop is not a place for them.

But maybe never more than like when there is a war on... an absolutely massive, global war... the first atomic war, the war that could bring about Armageddon, for all the angel knows... and everyone in the human world is trying to do their bit as best they can and, one day, a young woman claiming to be British intelligence knocks on the door and says that they need the angel-- this particular angel and only him... this angel who sometimes feels like he doesn't always know how best to help but wants nothing more than to be good and do good and help others.

The Allied Forces needs Mr. Fell for an intelligence mission to help thwart the Nazis and work towards stopping the war. And what do they need from this angel, in particular?

They need his books.

Aziraphale collects books of all kinds but he has two major personal collections that are highlighted in the story. One is humorous and self-aware-- a collection of misprinted Bibles. Those are living proof of the fallacy of language and gospel-- of the bullshit of people. They are comforting to him in their existence, as they reinforce his sense that following what others say is the word of God is not really a better path than following his own moral compass. The Allied Forces don't need these books, though.

They need the other ones that Aziraphale has been collecting forever:

His books of prophecy.

This angel collects written works by humans that profess to be prophetic. He has original works of Nostradamus and Mother Shipton and many others. He has preserved them throughout centuries, keeping them safe in his care, even if the works are, largely, complete and utter balderdash. He has kept these books, nutty as they are, safe from damage and in existence, for years, just in the event that maybe these humans, in some way, really did have answers as to the future of the world in which the angel lives, too.

The one that he knows has been slated to be destroyed around 6,000 years from its inception-- a date that was approaching closer with each breath in 1941.

Was it really going to happen? Was there a way to stop it? Aziraphale has been trying to see if maybe the humans have found a way, studying their prophetic works for centuries upon centuries, anxiously looking for clues on how to stop Armageddon and save the world he loves...

...and also therefore be able, as a result, to stay on Earth with the person he loves and not be separated from him for eternity.

It's these books of this angel-- these beloved, material possessions; these perfect examples of everything that he's been told that he's not supposed to have-- that Captain Rose Montgomery of British Intelligence says that he can provide to entrap some Nazis and help save the world for his fellow humans and his partner.

An angel's biggest blind spot is always wanting to help and never feeling like they're doing enough. They're vulnerable to trusting the wrong people for the right reasons. Their desperation to do good and be good in the face of feeling like they're not a good person at all can cause them to have the best of intentions but be open to manipulation by those with the worst of ones.

Sometimes, it's a human Nazi. Sometimes, it's a supernatural one...

...same difference. Both dangerous. Both examples of an area where an angel might not survive if they don't let in a trusted person who can give to them the same love and care they give to everyone else.

The fallout from making a mistake can be devastating to an angel.

They feel embarrassed and snappish-- the anger and frustration related to the miscalculated situation triggering (and masking) the anxiety and depression to which angels are hardly strangers.

They can retreat into self-doubt. Moments of bravery when it comes to trying again are sometimes just as quickly diluted by their compounding insecurity and the fear that they are just jiggery-pokery and do not belong in the world.

This is when they need their demons the most.

Demons? They are fallen angels.

They know all this about angels because they're not much different themselves.

They have had the experience of having to redefine themselves in the face of being told by their societies that they were no longer angels and, in some ways, that has freed the more introspective demons to have enough perspective to offer counsel to willing angels as to how to manage those conflicts.

These demons, like Crowley and Beez, are uniquely well-suited to loving angels because they have also been through these same conflicts-- and still struggle with many of them.

These demons have experienced violence and violation as a result their angelic conflicts. They are drawn towards the inherent goodness of their angels, who approach them with kindness, respect, and a sense of equality to which the demons are not accustomed but which helps to build trust.

Just as these demons seek to protect these angels from harm that might befall them in the future, the angels we're discussing are both mindful of their partners' pasts and take care to help them feel safe. They are emphatic about their partners' comfort, reinforce their expectations of a partnership involving free choice and equality, and continually make clear that they consider-- and will always consider-- explicit, enthusiastic consent essential.

Their demons' knowledge of the darker aspects of the world also make them uniquely aware of the risks to their angels and they seek to protect them from experiencing the same pain they have felt from trusting the wrong faces. They do everything they can to keep their angels from falling-- literally, as in from Heaven, or more figuratively, as into despair.

They give them music and food and companionship... they open up the world for the angels and help them live life with the other people in the pub, literally and metaphorically. They explore the human world with them and make them feel less alone, letting the angels do the same for them.

Loving an angel is first seeing that angel there and acknowledging their humanity. It's affirming their imperfection as being just part of personhood and holding up that personhood as being worthy of love. It is reflecting back to the angels the same empathy, openness, and lack of judgement as what the angels give to them.

It's seeing that the angel who wrestles with living up to the expectations of the statues in his honor and the titles for which he never asked is, really, an imperfect, good-hearted, kind person beneath his snarky, sharp-edged exterior. It's seeing the depression that clouds his eyes and the fine edges he's walking in Heaven and knowing what comes next more than maybe can see in the moment and protecting him, as best as someone can, from the fallout of those actions.

Beez knows what it is to fall. They see Gabriel already in a downward motion in every way there is and knows that it comes with risk of losing himself, the way that they once did themselves. They dump out the matchsticks because the good kind of fire is already lit between them and the fire of Hell is not for their angel. They gift him a fly-- that which is made from their body. They are Gabriel's container. He is safe by putting all of himself, literally and figuratively, into Beez.

While this is a big moment in the Ineffable Bureaucracy parallel and one that also parallels the holy water, Gabriel's response to it is a mirror to Aziraphale's response to Crowley saving the books in 1941. What can Gabriel maybe tell us about what Aziraphale was feeling then, through what is similar and what is different about these two moments?

For starters, Gabriel and Beez knew how they felt about one another before The Fly. They already had shared that through "Everyday". The Fly is not an "oh" moment for Gabriel, in the sense that it wasn't a sudden revelation of either Beez's love or of his own. If anything, he and Beez never really had an "oh" moment in that sense of one because elements of how they both felt were always just understood and present in their interactions.

This is honestly true of a lot of relationships. A lot of "oh" moments are not so much becoming aware of having feelings for someone but are just being hit with a new aspect of love that both/all parties is/are already aware is in existence, even if it hasn't always yet been fully spoken.

In S1, we see that Gabriel and Beez only let their guard down around one another. They have always been as close to friends as they could be in their positions. They already care about one another when we first see them together and then, in S2, Gabriel is completely unsurprised at Beez's flirting with him moments into the first date-- and Beez had no hesitation in doing so, suggesting that they likely have before.

Their attraction to one another is presented as an existing given between them from the very start of their flashback sequence. There's no "oh" over The Fly or anything else because they just know. They start to give words and actions to it as they fall deeper in love throughout the scenes but there's never any doubt that they both have been long-aware of what exists between them.

If anything, Ineffable Bureaucracy is probably the real, millennia-long pining relationship in Good Omens, as while they had all these very good foundations for a romantic relationship, they didn't really begin to pursue one until between S1 and S2.

Gabriel's response to The Fly parallels Aziraphale's response to Crowley saving the books in 1941, even if the contrasting part of the parallel is that both are responses to gestures made by these demons for their angels in very different stages of these relationships.

For Gabriel, The Fly is an "oh" moment-- but not one that is about a new revelation related to love existing. It's about what is, for him, a heartbreakingly new experience:

It's not that Gabriel doesn't already know how he and Beez both feel about one another because already he does by this point. Gabriel isn't having a realization of the existence of his love or of Beez's love when Beez gives him The Fly; he's having a realization that this is what it feels like to be loved.

And what is feeling loved, to an angel?

It's being and feeling truly seen.

It's someone noticing them and coming along to care for them while they're out there, trying to save the world when they're sometimes not sure they can even save themselves. It's someone seeing that in them and not seeing anything worth berating them about the way that they berate themselves but, instead, seeing a person worthy of their love and protection.

Loving an angel is giving them the same kindness and care that they give to the world but that they often deny themselves.

For Gabriel, that night in The Resurrectionist was the first time that anyone had ever done something like that for him. It wasn't an "oh" of I'm in love because he already knew that and that Beez felt the same way. It was an "oh", though, of falling deeper in love. It was an "oh" of feeling love.

Beez had already done kind things for him before they gave him The Fly but The Fly and its matchbox are the first ever physical things Gabriel has been given by someone. He has never had any possessions besides his clothes before. He's never been given a gift.

He and Beez go to bars and pubs on their dates; they're surrounded by humans with songs and birthdays and Christmases and going on dates and living a life that involves tangible, physical things that Gabriel is supposed to be above but to which he is drawn.

On the first two dates we see, he and Beez meet up in places but they do not order anything. They do consume the music together and, by the night at The Resurrectionist, they take another step towards engaging more in the human world that they've largely been absorbing and observing together to date. They do so through allowing themselves to be a part of the space, too-- Gabriel miracling the song on the jukebox for Beez-- but also through material objects.

They start ordering stuff. Gabriel is happy to bring Beez something-- buying them beer and a bag of chips/packet of crisps, even if they're undecided on actually consuming them. He makes it clear that he doesn't have any expectations that Beez actually eat or drink anything if they don't want to but the idea is that they have moved to a place where they can see what the humans see in bringing one another things as they move through the world together.

Gabriel has gone from a being who barely knows why he's meeting Beez in this bar to being excited to see them again and happy to buy them a drink and their preferred snack to stare at. Beez is having a ball getting the food-judgy-if-also-food-curious Gabriel to buy them what they've clearly told him he had best call a packet of crisps if he plans on seeing them again. 😂 They have begun to let themselves claim resources for each other and themselves and to start to get less intense about consumption, which are features of recognizing the humanity in one another and themselves.

Gabriel's "oh" moment when he is given The Fly is that this is the first time he knows what it's like to experience the world as a person who has a person who cares about them and has brought them something.

What he means when he says "no one's ever given me anything before" is really "no one's ever thought about me before."

He means no one has ever seen him there-- until Beez did.

The gift of The Fly reminds Gabriel of that and shows him getting used to the new feeling of not being invisible and alone. He falls deeper in love with Beez and sees them more fully in return as well as a result of their gift and that, it could be argued, is what love is.

Love, if it's good, is a lot of "oh" moments-- because you don't fall in love once. You fall over and over again, deeper each time.

The difference between this moment with Gabriel and Beez versus the paralleling one between Crowley and Aziraphale is that, by 1941, our angel, Aziraphale, has known years upon years upon years of being seen by his demon.

(Amusingly, considering the theme of love as recognition, The Serpent is also literally, ya know, um, rather watchful at times. 😂)

Aziraphale is no stranger to Crowley being kind to him or rescuing him from the times he might have blundered, like we all do at times, in trying to do good.

Crowley saving the books in 1941 is absolutely not the first time that he's ever done something as Beez-and-The-Fly-level romantic as this for Aziraphale. In many ways, that's likely the point.

While The Fly was the first time of what will be many that Gabriel experienced what it was to feel loved by feeling seen, Crowley saving Aziraphale's books is a gesture that could not have happened at all without Crowley's long-held, intimate knowledge of Aziraphale as a person.

What makes Crowley saving Aziraphale's books so romantic isn't even just that he knows how important the books are to Aziraphale but that he knows Aziraphale so well that he could predict that the books would need rescuing.

Crowley knew that his angel would only focus on getting the two of them out of the church alive and unharmed and absolutely was going to forget about those beloved books of his while trying to protect them both and then be completely and utterly crushed when he did.

In this way, it's a contrasting parallel to Gabriel and Beez because, while that was the first time Gabriel had ever felt seen, 1941 is time number six trillion and five that Crowley had made Aziraphale feel seen like this and he's now so well-practiced at it that it's old hat at this point.

There is no judgement from Crowley about what happened with the Nazis in any of this. Aziraphale is horrible to himself over things like mistakes like he made in this church and being forgetful about these books but Crowley sees no such need for any of that. He protects Aziraphale from the fallout but in such a way that says he admires Aziraphale for trying to take the actions that he did. He sees Aziraphale as brave and his actions quietly affirm, much in the way that Beez does for Gabriel, that just because they are an angel who is used to doing for others doesn't mean they're not also a person who needs someone to do for them, too, and that Crowley is happy to be that person.

Aziraphale is reminded by Crowley knowing him well enough to anticipate that the books will need to be saved and taking care of that for him that they are a team. That Aziraphale doesn't have to worry about managing everything on his own because he and Crowley help each other manage life. They know each other well and have been together so long that they just know how to take care of one another.

It's not an "oh" of a realization of I'm in love for the first time. It is, as Michael Sheen says, a moment of falling in love. It's an "oh" of having been in love for a very long time and that love still finding new ways to surprise in its ability to keep causing Aziraphale to happily fall deeper and deeper...

This isn't realizing love and it's not the first time that Crowley has done something sweet and romantic like this for him-- it's the power of it being the nine billionth time Crowley has. It's the feeling of "oh" for Aziraphale that is a reminder that he is safe in the knowledge that Crowley knows him, through and through, and when confronted with the most real Aziraphale there is... the one that can be prone to making mistakes out of insecurities and self-doubt... the one that struggles sometimes with self-worth and brutal perfectionism... Crowley knows, sees him there, and is still madly in love with him.

Crowley never sees Aziraphale as weak or lesser for feeling any of it. He loves those sides of Aziraphale because he loves all of Aziraphale. He won't let Aziraphale be embarrassed because he likes and admires him as he is. He's gentle and kind and understanding about Aziraphale's insecurities, treating Aziraphale with the same care that Aziraphale shows him.

Crowley, better than anyone else ever has or will, sees Aziraphale for who Aziraphale truly is.

He loves that angel and his love helps Aziraphale to quiet some of his self-doubts and be a little kinder to himself-- much in the same way that Aziraphale's love does for Crowley. Crowley loving him makes Aziraphale feel like maybe there's a chance that he might be worth loving.

Loving an angel is making them feel seen and Aziraphale, holding those books Crowley rescued for him?

He felt very loved indeed.

The "oh" moment of 1941 is one moment where we see that Aziraphale has just been reminded of just how much Crowley truly sees him there-- and of just how much Crowley loves him. What we are watching, imho, is not the first realization of love but just one of a million different moments throughout history of Aziraphale continuing to fall deeper and deeper in love with Crowley.

[starry-bi-sky]

Stillborn? No, still born au -- Dani Phantom! Clone girl herself. :]

She can't exist in this au. And it's not that I don't want to add her -- although I'll be blunt, I don't, I'll be the first to admit that I think she's more often than not nothing more than a narrative deadweight used to prop up Danny and I don't like adding characters as props -- but her existence quite literally goes against and muddies the Vlad and Danny dynamic I have for this au. Ellie's existence in canon itself states that she was created -- and Danny's other clones too -- because Vlad gave up on trying to convert him to his side and decided to just make a son instead.

Something that just, doesn't happen in the stillborn-still born au. See, for folks who are only just hearing about this au or didn't see my post about Vlad in this au, he and Danny have a complicated love-hate relationship where they mutually want to adopt each other, but their morals and way of doing things -- mainly Vlad's insistence on getting revenge against the Fentons -- gets in the way of them being able to do that in full.

Vlad knows Danny wants him to adopt him, and is only fighting him on it because he refuses to let Vlad kill the Fentons for essentially killing the both of them. He's succeed in 50% of his goal. Canon Vlad never even made it to 1%. With that in mind, stillborn Vlad has no reason and sees no reason to clone Danny, he has his son. He just needs to convince him to let him avenge them both.

Dani simply has no place in the stillborn-still born au. And in fact, if Vlad did decide to clone Danny -- for whatever reason, -- it would damage his relationship with Danny damn near beyond repair. That's because Danny would view it the same way he views Damian's existence; as a replacement for himself. He would become beyond furious and hurt, and not for the typical 'I can't believe you cloned me, you creep!' reason, but for a 'I can't believe you cloned me, you said I was your son!' reason.

I am not pulling any punches here when I say Danny wants Vlad to be his dad just as much as Vlad wants Danny to be his son, there's just a lot of factors getting in the way. They are, as the french say, ✨mentally unwell.✨ Danny has a ton of abandonment and trust issues due to his experiences in foster care. He would immediately become jealous, insecure, and incredibly furious and hurt. He'd despise her on principal and want nothing to do with her, or Vlad for that matter. He'd just fucking haaate her. It's not her fault she was made but Danny doesn't really care, he's lashing out and pushing people away because he's been betrayed yet again.

The only way they could get along or for Danny to actually like her in any capacity would be if it was his idea to clone himself. Which is like, kinda obvious but considering most clone plots tend to be non-consensual it's kinda gotta be said. He has to have a hand in creating her, that's the only way I can see him liking her in any way. Or if someone other than Vlad created her. If Vlad clones him though, all bets are off the table and he'll despise her.

TL;DR: Dani can't exist in this au because she goes against the narrative I've got for the two most fucked up half-dead could-be-father-son duo in existence, but if she did exist Danny would despise her.