#the best defense is a good offense
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Citrinne!!
One shot queen.
#citrinne#fire emblem engage#fe17#fe engage#fe17 fanart#fire emblem fanart#brodia#my art#i appreciate that she would level up in magic and absolutely nothing else#the best defense is a good offense
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My sensitivity level is set to the highest value. And I feel bored
So...
It's time to DDoS Cortex Center
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”Local man cheekboned to death as an act of revenge”
-What Tom feared would be in the paper the next day if he wasn’t quick enough with the ashtray
#The best defense is a good offense#Seriously tho Freddie better be careful#He turns around too fast and someone gets smacked to the ground#ripley 2024#ripley netflix#tom ripley#freddie miles#eliot sumner#You don’t mess around with that bone structure#ripley
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#kirby#krtdldx#kirby's return to dream land#Maxim tomato#kirby meme#the best defense is a good offense#who needs super powers?
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NO BUT ALSO
Portions of the African continent have the zorilla, which while technically not a skunk (mustelidae instead of mephitidae) looks much like a skunk. And also, defends itself much like a skunk.
Which means the same settler/colonizer postulated in the original tweet might've gone, "That's it, I'm taking my crimes somewhere safer!" and then been ass-blasted by a completely different critter, "BARBARA, IT'S HAPPENED AGAIN!"
#skunk#zorilla#the best defense is a good offense#and boy howdy#by talos this can't be happening again
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About to climb through Dracula's window
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Restoration AU: Ned I
Previous part, Bran I, here.
NED 1
Ned was embroiled in discussions with Vayon regarding the additional food stores that would need to be procured to feast the king’s party in accordance with his expectations—and Robert’s expectations certainly tended toward the lavish—when Jory burst into his solar, looking so rattled that Ned rose in alarm, convinced that something had happened to one of the children.
“My lord,” he said. “There are—that is, your son, Bran—”
Before Ned could fear the worst, he caught motion beyond the door frame, and his gaze fell upon the auburn hair of his second-youngest as he poked his head in the door. Robb and Jon had also accompanied Jory, trailing just behind, and they looked as perturbed as his captain of the guard. Robb’s mouth was a hard, harsh line that recalled Cat when she was in full fury, and Jon looked as pale as the direwolf pup he’d named Ghost.
His nerves settled on mild apprehension. “What is it, Jory?”
Jory cast a hesitant look at Vayon. “It is a matter that my lord may wish to discuss in private.”
Ned frowned. Jory and Vayon had known one another for several years now. Enough for his captain and steward to know that he held both of them in high esteem. He was unsure what it meant that Jory should be wary of the man now, but it could be nothing good.
“We can finish attending to the feast preparations later, Vayon,” Ned said. “It seems my sons have found themselves a spot of mischief.”
Robb’s eyes narrowed, further mystifying Ned. His steward inclined his head, then took his leave, and the children crowded into his solar. But rather than just the three he had expected, two more entered behind Robb and Jon, furs wrapped around either of them, and Jory’s own cloak atop that.
Ned’s mouth, which had opened to demand answers of his captain and his son, snapped shut as his gaze fell upon the two strange children, his wits abandoning him for several blank seconds. One, with hair but a shade or two lighter than his own, returned his stare with a wariness that wavered as it went on, taking on the faint sheen of tears. His face was as familiar as his own, as alike to Jon’s as a brother’s would be.
It cannot be.
It was the other child’s appearance, however, that lanced through his shock, turning it icy with dread. Rhaegar Targaryen was fourteen years dead, but Ned had known the prince’s face well, for it had haunted more than a few nightmares since, he and Lyanna both. This child could be the prince’s son—a comparison driven home as Ned glanced from one to the other, finding as many similarities between them as they shared with Jon.
Brothers. They must be, of nearly identical height and build. Twins, perhaps, except that one could be his son, while the other—
How? The children looked to be of an age with his daughters, meaning Rhaegar would have been four or five years dead by the time they were born. Ned himself had seen the mangled skull of his infant son, Aegon, and had the boy lived, he would have been Jon’s age.
And yet that is what they look like. Rhaegar’s sons, four years too young. The son whose death Robert celebrated, and the son whose death he would seek, if he only knew.
As he studied the dark-haired child more closely, subtle differences presented themselves between him and Jon. His eyes were a lighter grey that took on a tinge of purple the longer Ned stared into them, recalling the terror of the first few months of Jon’s life, before his own had darkened to a deep grey. His hair was a shade lighter, its dark brown slightly warmer.
And yet none of that mattered. The Valyrian coloring that House Targaryen had been known for was not uncommon in the Free Cities, but anyone who had ever seen the mad king or his wife and son would recognize their blood in these children. The other child’s coloring would all but invite such comparisons, and there was no greater danger. They could easily be siblings, the three of them.
It cannot be Aerys, nor can it be Rhaegar. Could Rhaella have lived after all to follow her children into hiding? Her remains had been cremated in accordance with Targaryen tradition by the time Dragonstone had been taken. Died in childbed, they had been told. Any whispers of the exiled queen’s survival surely would have made it to their shores.
Yet it was the only possible explanation. Any child of Rhaella’s would look like her slain son. But why would they be here? Why now, as Robert openly travels to Winterfell?
“We found them on the outskirts of the wolfswood, half frozen,” Jory said, breaking the tense silence. “Young Bran spotted them.”
The children were both shivering, Ned realized at last. He managed a smile at his youngest. “Bran, lad, go see if Gage has any soup on—something hot for our guests.”
Disappointment flashed across his son’s face, his curiosity readily apparent, but he cast the two boys a sympathetic look and swallowed his protest. “Yes, Father. I shall bring it myself!”
Once he had gone, Ned turned back to the children. “I am Lord Stark,” he said, keeping his voice low and gentle. “And you are in Castle Winterfell. Who might you be?”
“Is it not plain, Father?” Robb snapped, tensed as though for a fight. “There is no need to make a farce of it, now that you’ve sent Bran away.”
Ned sucked in a breath, feeling a fool as comprehension struck. Jory’s obvious discomfort, Robb’s fury, Jon’s quiet shock—
They think that I…?
Ned stared into his son’s eyes, finding shock and betrayal beneath the anger. A mirthless chuckle rose in his chest and he forced it down. Why should they not, after all? He had soiled his honor once in claiming Jon as his son. The appearance of two children on the outskirts of Winterfell who looked to be his bastard son’s younger brothers offered one obvious explanation.
Denial followed his stalled laughter, smothered just as quickly in the wake of another realization. Deny their relation, and Jon’s apparent kinship to two children of Targaryen features would invite all the questions Ned had feared in the first few years of his son’s life. Why would a boy with no relation to House Targaryen look like one of their long-dead scions?
Suspicious minds would turn to his sister and the man who had kidnapped her. The timing of Jon’s appearance, the fact that Ned had been the one to find her in the Tower of Joy, it would all point to a deadly truth—a treason that Robert would never forgive.
Unless there was another explanation. One that Jory and both of his sons had clearly seized upon, one that would all but guarantee Jon’s safety.
If they were my own bastard sons, Jon’s brothers…
Then there was no possible relation between Jon and Rhaegar Targaryen. How could there be? His brothers would have been born years after the prince’s death, their mother some woman from Lys, perhaps, with the silver-blond hair and purple eyes of Valyria that were so prized in that city. No one would look for House Targaryen in them, if House Stark offered an excuse for their shared resemblance.
To protect Jon, his only option might be to stain his honor beyond recognition. To flaunt these children, as though he had nothing to hide.
“Leave us,” Ned said. “I would speak to these children alone.”
Robb’s face reddened, his son’s outrage whipped to a frenzy. “I will not—”
“That is your lord’s command,” Ned said, unable to keep the edge from his voice. “Go. I will speak to you later.”
His son’s fists clenched, the hurt swimming beneath his anger plain, but he gave a stiff nod. “Come, Snow,” he said to his brother.
Stark, Snow. Names that his sons had taken to calling one another in the past year as they neared manhood, the growing understanding of their differing circumstances wedging itself between them. The names were not spoken unkindly, but Ned caught the barest flinch on Jon’s face this time.
Jory was the last to leave, pausing by the door. “We returned through the Hunter’s Gate, my lord, but we ran across Theon on our way to the keep.”
Ned nodded tersely in understanding. His ward was loud of mouth and held no fondness for Jon. If he too had concluded that the boys were Jon’s bastard brothers, then word would spread quickly through Winterfell. It would reach Cat soon enough, if Robb had not gone to tell her himself, and Ned’s heart clenched. As keen as Robb’s pain and betrayal had been, his wife’s suffering would be far worse.
But the children in the room with him now were a more immediate concern. Ned approached them slowly, testing their reaction. Jon’s young twin had lost none of his earlier wariness, though he did not appear to be frightened of him. And the other child regarded him with a quiet curiosity that was entirely Jon’s.
They are so like him.
“I am Lord Eddard Stark,” he said again. “What are your names?”
“I am Jon,” said the dark-haired one, and it was all Ned could do not to react. “And this is my twin brother, Raymar.”
Jon and Raymar. Vale names, both, which was no less puzzling than anything else about them. Ned doubted that Rhaella Targaryen had been hiding herself or her sons in the Vale, which had practically served as the heart of the rebellion against her family’s rule.
“We thank you for your house’s kindness, Lord Stark,” Raymar said with a bow of his head.
Neither seemed uncomfortable in the presence of a lord, let alone the Warden of the North. Their composure spoke to an upbringing a highborn child would have.
“And to which house do you belong?” Ned asked, curious if they would answer plainly.
Young Jon shifted slightly to put himself between his brother and Ned, and the twins exchanged an uneasy look that as good as answered his question.
“I would know your true names,” Ned said, keeping his voice gentle. “No harm will come to you.”
Even the way this Jon bit at the inside of his lip was so reminiscent of his own Jon that Ned felt freshly unnerved. “I am Baelon,” he said finally. “And he is Aemon.”
It took him a moment to place the names. Sons of Jaehaerys I. Perhaps Rhaella had wanted to cling to a time in her family’s history when they had been at the height of their power, though these names in particular bore an ill omen. Two heirs to the Iron Throne, both of whom had died before they could claim it—not unlike her firstborn.
Good men, though. That had been their legacy, the princes who should have ruled, rather than the king whose reign had ultimately led to the Targaryens turning on one another, dooming their dragons.
“Why have you come here?”
That was the question upon which everything hinged. Were they a message to Ned? A threat? Had Rhaella learned of her grandson’s fate? But he could not imagine what madness could have taken her to send two young children here to deliver such a message, especially when it could so easily be interpreted as a threat.
“We did not come here by choice, my lord,” Aemon said. “We were taken from our father.”
Ned had been so focused upon their Targaryen heritage that he had not even considered who their father might be. “What is your father’s name?”
The children exchanged another glance, and it was Baelon who spoke. “Daemon.”
Ned could not hide his reaction this time. With Maelys the Monstrous’s death, the Blackfyre line had been thought to be ended at last. The male line, at least. Could there have been a descendent willing to tie himself to the exiled House Targaryen? The benefit for Rhaella Targaryen was plain: the Golden Company was said to be ten-thousand strong and of impeccable discipline—the closest to an army one could hope to hire, as sellswords went.
Rhaella Targaryen gives them the legitimacy they desire, and they offer her the start of an army. And yet—could such an alliance have been formed without whispers eventually reaching Robert’s ears?
And if someone had kidnapped her two sons, the joining of House Blackfyre and Targaryen, then that spoke to yet another plot. Someone who opposed their ambitions?
Someone who also knew, or had guessed, the true circumstances of Jon’s birth?
I am as much a pawn in this game as these children are, Ned thought grimly. As Jon now was.
“What can you tell me about your captors?” he asked.
“We were bound and blinded at first,” Aemon said. “And later made to drink a concoction that ushered us to sleep.”
Dreamwine, mostly like. Or even milk of the poppy. “You remember nothing at all?”
The child shook his head, distress creeping into his voice. “We were with our father and then we were here, alone in the cold and snow.”
“And your mother?” Ned asked, because he had to be sure.
Sorrow settled over them, keenest in Aemon, whose brother answered for them. “Dead.”
Ned watched them carefully. “Rhaella?”
Aemon’s gaze snapped to his, widening in surprise before the child could compose himself. His brother squeezed his hand and gave a silent nod.
Dead. That both simplified and complicated matters, though Ned was not certain precisely how. It made their kidnapping all the more mysterious in its purpose. A power struggle between the queen’s surviving children, perhaps? If her eldest, Viserys, feared that the Golden Company would support their claim over his, due to whatever Blackfyre blood might flow in their veins, then sending them away might have been his answer.
Sending them here could yet be a threat against Jon, or simple coincidence.
A rap at the door startled all three of them, and Ned gestured at them to remain still as he answered it. It was Jory once more, bearing a tray of stew and bread. Apparently Bran had insisted on bringing it himself, but the captain had intercepted the heavy load, judging it best that he take it up instead. Ned nodded his thanks, and brought the tray back into his solar.
“Here,” Ned said, setting it down on the table and beckoning the children over. “You must be hungry.”
Baelon broke off a piece of the bread, handing it to his brother first, then taking a bite of his own. He seemed to relax then. They have been raised to know our customs, at least, Ned thought. Though it pained him that the child had feared they might have been harmed.
Stolen away from their family and abandoned in the snow-covered fields outside the wolfswood, in the heart of a kingdom loyal to the man who had killed their kin, and would gladly see their house erased, down to the last child. That they had remained this composed in his presence was a sign of either great bravery or misunderstanding of the danger they were in.
And given how wary Baelon had been since their arrival, Ned suspected they both knew precisely how much danger they were in—to the point of fabricating names for themselves.
The stew put some color in their cheeks, and the fire had warmed them enough that they were no longer shivering. Ned, who had taken a seat opposite them, fought the urge to sag back against his chair as the throbbing pressure of a headache formed at his temples.
“You seem to understand that you cannot be Baelon and Aemon here,” Ned said once they’d finished their stew and sopped up the remnants with the last of the bread. Both children nodded. “I can protect you until I have found a way to return you home, but until then, I shall require your cooperation.”
They looked to one another once more, but seemed in agreement. “What do you require of us?” Aemon asked.
“You are Raymar,” Ned said. He glanced at Baelon, unnerved yet again at how like his son he looked as he studied Ned back. “You cannot be Jon, as I already have a son named Jon.”
The children blinked in twin surprise, seeming to immediately grasp his intention. “Willam,” Baelon said. “I can be Willam, my lord.”
Another name favored in the Vale, though not uncommon elsewhere. “That is acceptable,” Ned said. Then he took a deep breath. “And you must call me Father.”
x~x~x
Okay but my favorite thing is that Ned giving two more of his bastards Vale names is so very recognizably him, even though he didn't suggest either name to them!
Which POV to write next? Decisions, decisions...
#resonant 'verse restoration au#ned embracing the chaos because what other choice does he have#sometimes the best defense is a good offense#and what an offense...
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your f/o is deep in your guts trying desperately not to nut, but you're so warm and wet and squishing against them just so and you sound so cute and perfect... anyway, what are they thinking of to stay focused?
#izuku is thinking of how to best advertise his friends' hero merch at the hero convention next saturday without showing a preference#asta is thinking of better recipes for moguro leaf juice that he could adapt from a clover tasty! recipe#tanjiro is thinking about the easiest places to find fatsia sprouts without depleting the ecosystem#reno is not thinking#tsukasa is thinking about protein powder that also doubles as hair skin and nails treatment#yuuji is memorizing that bee movie gif backwards#mash is also not thinking#suo is thinking about how the best defense is a good offense#barou brought protection and does not care#mimi speaks
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i missed the game last night but hearing Rumor they did the “we talked abt heiskanen, now of course you have to talk about makar” thing. presumably compared them . etc etc. my controversial opinion is that miro could score a goal on makar defending but makar couldn’t score a goal on miro defending . if anyone cares
#that like old meme that’s like change my mind and it just says this#like if they ran it 3-5 times miro would come out with more success ykwim#and that’s not saying anything abt who is a better PLAYER. but i think miro is better at defense than maybe anyone else in the league#is he the BEST at offense. no he doesn’t aim shots he just rips it in the direction of the net and prays#hes good at generating it but makar is probably better at actual scoring probably#but i think we put too much weight on offensive ability when discussing defensemen… we know this#yap yap yapping
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mindlessly scrolled through tiktok today and saw a rhaewin edit of harwin saving rhaenyra during her and laenor's wedding feast + harwin beating up criston (set to the 'i need a big boy' sound) anyway my thoughts immediately turned to jace's kingship and i went
"jace enters a room but the first thing ppl see is joffrey's shadow and the first thing they hear is the sound of aegon iii's armor"
basically joffrey most closely inherits harwin's sheer mass+height meanwhile aeggie grew up to be part of jace's kingsguard (also #justiceforjoffreyvelaryoncommanderofthecitywatch)
#jacaerys velaryon#joffrey velaryon#aegon iii targaryen#king jacaerys targaryen first of his name#hotd thoughts#rhaewin#best believe NONE of them play abt jace's safety#i'm a big fan of mad dog joffrey#bc yknow harwin's build on a boy DAEMON raised??🤭🤭#the flavor is simply too good#also a big fan of calm and collected but no less protective aegon iii#when jace is threatened joff plays offense while aeg plays defense basically#and they're always together#my precious middle children🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻#hotd headcanon
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defending my thesis today y'all!
#quynh: defending? what kinda armour are u wearing?#andy: best defense is a good offense. throw rocks at em#sogd
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#I was talking to some buddies about lies of p and sekiro and how LoP’s defense as offense mentality helped get into sekiro#but then how sekiro overwrote that mentality with its own “offense is the best defense” mentality#or “hesitate and you lose” as Grandpappy isshin would say#and how the switch for the change for me was genichiro who I think is one of the best designed bosses in gaming#you CAN’T play too defensively with him because he’s happy to pepper you with arrows from a distance#and then the moment comes when you realize your sword interrupts his bow attacks sekiro truly begins as a game#lady butterfly is also a good fight but all her moves bring her to you so there’s less incentive to be as aggressive#vs genny baby who will back off and fire off his bow if you let him#this isn’t even like a video of me playing perfectly but I LOVE getting my feudal edgelord corner stunned and just bursting him down#I kinda hate the owl shinobi fight bc he hits too hard and his attacks just aren’t interesting to react to#but it’s also possible to corner stun him and just go to town on his health bar#owl father and inner father are much better fights and I actually really enjoyed inner father a lot#but the Ashina family fights are absolutely stunning achievements in game design imo#perfectly balanced to be difficult but fair and visually stunning to boot#even if there is a layer of artificial difficulty in the final battle with the flowers obscuring their swords when they’re crouched#but the animations are solid enough that there are enough other more subtle differences like how hes shifting his weight#if he’s centered he’s going to lunge but if he’s angled he’s gonna sweep#I had so much fun with LoP and sekiro 🥰🥰🥰 I crave more…#I can’t say the combat in Elden ring gorilla gripped me like these two games have but I like HAVE to play dark souls I know this#sekiro#tsuchi plays games
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some surprising stats about the matchup today
like some stuff is certainly what i expected, but we're fairly evenly matched in other spots that i wasn't.... i knew our run defense is better than the eye test, like we aren't necessarily allowing explosive runs like we did last year. (run blocking is, as expected, atrocious lol.) the fact that we're technically better at tackling than the nfl's number 1 defense is shocking though! logan and germaine are doing A LOT of heavy lifting there, and they haven't necessarily been consistent (hence still being 20th lol). i'm also surprised we have a better rushing score, but that just speaks to those flashes where chase has been good, he's been really good!
i genuinely have no idea how this game is gonna go basically!
#what i'm hearing is they have the best defense but haven't necessarily played any particularly great offenses#we have a very good offense. but sometimes we just kind of fuck around for a quarter or two and forget that lol#tee being back is gonna be huge i feel. and maybe jermaine is going to be particularly inspired being back in LA??#with his bestie brenden on the other side??#also justin herbert can absolutely sling it. his receivers letting him down is probably the only reason he doesn't get talked about more#who knows!!!#this is as must win as it gets btw#like. i guess we /technically/ aren't out of it if we lose. anything can happen.#but if we want any kind of realistic path to the 7th seed or higher then winning this is our best shot.#and now to wait around for 8 hours overthinking things until kickoff!!
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bengals win today yes?
#manifestation post 😊🙏#RIGHT#against a team with a winning streak#🤠#We Shall See#playoffs seem very impossible i can't lie lmaoooo but honestly i just want to see them Play Their Best and idk have fun#last home game this season!! and possible Last Home Game Ever for Some People apparently or whatever#i don't want to know ok. fuck that. fuck that endlessly.#so please win <3 i believe in you bengals i love you <3#insane passing and receiving yards!! insane touchdowns!!! insane passer rating!!!! insane receptions!!!!!!!#break bengals recordssssss#defense step the fuck upppp offense you're going against a savant of a defense is what I'm hearing here apparently lmao so just idk#do your best 😭👍 have fun#to be Honest i don't expect much 😭 because again. savant of a defense. holy shit. and rain?? BUT WHATEVER WE BALLLLLLL#bengals defense 👉👈 time to prove it isn’t just a minute thing okay? okay.#defense when i tell u u need to stop a run game u need to stop a run game genuinely why can’t you tackle. how. how the fuck.#god two more games im so sad 😔#no but really i read the what to watch article and just broke down a bit i genuinely don’t know what to expect#(also look at joes tongue poking out as he reaches out a pinky to ja’marr 😀 ok.)#is it too much too ask for a 60+ td from ja’marr ehehe#like ik its supposed to rain (oh boy) and he’s going against ps2 (oh boy) but i miss it#miss him 😔#anyway did u know mims my beloved favorite child mims is going to play through a broken hand. golly 🤠 and objs back!!!!#just keep everyone healthy i beg#i hope we get a pick six too lmaooooo am i really asking for too much for the last home game of the season against a team with such good#stats and players and with the probability of rain (?) am i really am i. am i.#im so anxious im sorry 😭#anyway hope joe keeps his streak going chase and geno too lol and ja'marr gets to break the rec and td record etc etc bengals win ilu
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Before you enter the final segment of the game, I’d recommend getting as many healing items as possible
literally dont you even worry im always stacking up on healing items before any of the finales
#Kind of terrifying though that youre telling me for this one............ BUT WE'LL FIGURE IT OUT#im actually kind of improving at the fighting system#now that ive attempted to broaden my strategy past ''the best defense is a good offense''#<- How she managed to get through these games with this mindset a laptop and a trackpad is truly a mystery for the ages.#ask#krafterwrites
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so one thing about melanie that i think people often forget is that she's not a naturally aggresive person, at least not in the sense that she immediately goes into a situation looking to bite someone's head off. melanie, rather, is deeply defensive. i think this is most aparent in season one and two, but it's a trait that i think remains all throughout. the only time she doesn't at least try to start an interaction in a peaceful manner is when the bullet is buried at its deepest in her.
otherwise all her conversations seem to follow a pattern: trying to keep calm and civil, reaching out with an olive branch, only to at the very first sign of offense snatch it back and lash out instead. melanie's main cause for aggression is not some inate tendency towards violence or threat, but rather a deep insecurity formed by a life-time of being doubted or questioned or mocked. be the one to hit first and hit hardest, and maybe their punches won't feel as bad
#it's like when artists feel the need to critique their art and tear it to shreds before anyone else gets the chance#people who think she just enjoys tearing into people#and always views her actions through that lense severly misunderstand her character#because she tries! she tries so hard!#it's just that at the first sign of threat she can't help but revert back to safety#and sometimes the best defense is a good offense#even if there's not true need to defend yourself#melanie king#tma#the magnus archives
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