#the aubreyad

[bomberqueen17]

liveblogging the Aubreyad: a snippet from book 4

This is a long snippet that is totally incidental to the plot and does nothing but advance our knowledge of several characters, so of course I could not resist it. Mostly it is an excellent example of what a fucking troll Stephen is.

context: McAdam is the ship's surgeon on a vessel called Nereide, upon which Stephen is being transported to do some intelligence-work. McAdam is another Irishman, from Ulster, and a physician also, of high reputation but fallen on hard times-- his specialty is diseases of the mind, and he remains fascinated by psychological and psychiatric issues, but he himself is now deeply alcoholic to the point of frequent inability to function, though he maintains an unfortunate perspicacity in some matters that perhaps Stephen might wish he did not. He and Stephen do not really get along, and in fact the previous night he had upset Stephen severely. Stephen's good humor, severely tried by recent events, has been restored because he has just been summoned on deck by Nereide's solicitous captain, who is aware that Stephen is a passionate naturalist, to witness a mermaid, who was floating next to the ship as it passed.

McAdam looked singularly unappetizing in the morning light, ill-conditioned and surly: apprehensive too, for he had some confused recollection of harsh words having passed the night before. But, having beheld the mermaid, Stephen was in charity with all men, and he called out, "You missed the mermaid, my dear colleague; but perhaps, if we sit quietly here, we may see another." "I did not," said McAdam, "I saw the brute out of the quarter-gallery scuttle; and it was only a manatee." Stephen mused for a while, and then he said, "A dugong, surely. The dentition of the dugong is quite distinct from that of the manatee: the manatee, as I recall, has no incisors. Furthermore, the whole breadth of Africa separates their respective realms." "Manatee or dugong, 'tis all one," said McAdam. "As far as my studies are concerned, the brute is of consequence only in that it is the perfect illustration of the strength, the irresistible strength, of suggestion. Have you been listening to their gab, down there in the waist?" "Not I," said Stephen. There had been much talk among the men working just out of sight forward of the quarterdeck rail, cross, contentious talk; but the Nereide was always a surprisingly chatty ship, and apart from putting this outburst down to vexation at their late arrival, he had not attended to it. "They seem displeased, however," he added. "Of course they are displeased: everyone knows the ill-luck a mermaid brings. But that is not the point. Listen now, will you? That is John Matthews, a truthful, sober, well-judging man; and the other is old Lemon, was bred a lawyer's clerk, and understands evidence." Stephen listened, sorted out the voices, caught the thread of the argument: the dispute between Matthews and Lemon, the spokesmen of two rival factions, turned upon the question of whether the mermaid had held a comb in her hand or a glass. "They saw the flash of that wet flipper," said McAdam, and have translated it, with total Gospel-oath conviction, into one or other of these objects. Matthews offers to fight Lemon and any two of his followers over a chest in support of his belief.” “Men have gone to the stake for less," said Stephen: and walking forward to the rail he called down, "You are both of you out entirely: it was a hairbrush." Dead silence in the waist. The seamen looked at one another doubtfully, and moved quietly away among the boats on the booms with many a backward glance, thoroughly disturbed by this new element.

[softly-and-suddenly]

I’ve folded to the pressure (from myself) and started reading Master and Commander. I’ve never seen the movie or anything so I went into it blind, and it slapped me in the face by instantaneously being one of the most charming books I’ve ever read.

The first thing that happens in the book is Jack Aubrey, a naval officer, is enjoying a concert so much that he starts tapping along to the beat. Some random guy next to him tells him to shut up and they almost get into an altercation over it. The next day, Jack gets made a captain and he is so over the moon about it that when he runs into that guy on the street, he apologizes and takes him to lunch. They become best friends within maybe an hour, and Jack asks him to join his crew as their surgeon after having known him less time than it takes to cook a turkey. It’s incredible. Patrick O’Brian you are a gentleman and a scholar

[neosatsuma]

jury-rigged. even keel. by the board. three sheets to the wind. loose cannon. son of a gun. pipe down. taken aback.

[fluentisonus]

one thing I love very much about the master & commander film is how much it loves the lines on the ship & is so willing and happy to show the sheer number of them, there are so many shots where this always leaves such an impression on me watching it. like just off the top of my head (apologies for the image quality I'm on my phone). ough:

[elodieunderglass]

what do you like .... do? I see people tagging you all the time. Is there a reason or are they just moots who think that post is youcore?

It’s not so much what I do, it’s what other people kindly do. For my part I am just grateful.

Things I am known to collect (and admire and reblog):

#Horrible things with legs for a tag I’ve curated for, like, 10 years.

Relatedly, some absurd/weird fusions and chimaeras fall into this (usually being horrible or having legs) as well as fine art. It’s more about the ~vibe.

Wild animals exhibiting colour morphs, particularly leucistic ones.

Piebald birds in the wild, that made people kindly think of me, because they knew I’d be excited right there with them.

Swans, for obvious reasons (my swan comics, my avatar, the fact that I draw myself as a swan)

Other waterfowl, especially geese (sometimes people mistake geese for swans) and ducks (the ritual reply is usually something referencing “the massive continuity of ducks”)

Equines if they’re especially notable in some way.

Chickens ditto

Feathered dinosaurs ditto

Narrowboats (rarely)

I sometimes make jokes about wanting (a bag of) teeth, and so sometimes I am kindly given tumblr posts that are functionally like being given a bag of teeth.

Lord of the Rings, particularly hobbits

Birds generally, if they have the right flavour. I cannot explain what the right flavour is, but there is one

Deer when they’re completely normal

Art and craft of a certain level of absurdity

I’ve been a fan of the Aubreyad for 8 million years

References to my writing

In-jokes and references

as for why, you will have to ask everyone individually, and I think they’ll probably answer “Elodie sometimes makes funny noises when poked.”

I am sure this explains nothing, which is exactly how I like it. Cheers

[thekenobee]

Why, I’ve been clearing out the drafts!

[leona-florianova]

‘Must I put on silk stockings?’ ‘Certainly you must put on silk stockings. And do show a leg, my dear chap: we shall be late, without you spread a little more canvas.’ ‘You are always in such a hurry,’ said Stephen peevishly, groping among his possessions. A Montpellier snake glided out with a dry rustling sound and traversed the room in a series of extraordinarily elegant curves, its head held up some eighteen inches above the ground. ‘Oh, oh, oh,’ cried Jack, leaping on to a chair. ‘A snake!’ ‘Will these do?’ asked Stephen. ‘They have a hole in them.’ ‘Is it poisonous?’ ‘Extremely so. I dare say it will attack you, directly. I have very little doubt of it. Was I to put the silk stockings over my worsted stockings, sure the hole would not show: but then, I should stifle with heat. Do not you find it uncommonly hot?’ ‘Oh, it must be two fathoms long. Tell me, is it really poisonous? On your oath now?’ ‘If you thrust your hand down its throat as far as its back teeth you may meet a little venom; but not otherwise. Malpolon monspessulanus is a very innocent serpent. I think of carrying a dozen aboard, for the rats – ah, if only I had more time, and if it were not for this foolish, illiberal persecution of reptiles … What a pitiful figure you do cut upon that chair, to be sure.

Barney, Barney, buck or doe, Has kept me out of Channel Row,’ he sang to the serpent; and, deaf as an adder though it was, it looked happily into his face while he carried it away.

--Master and Commander, Patrick O'Brian

[proto-language]

"Throughout the series, neither Jack nor Stephen makes any measurable progress on their deficiencies—such being the nature of the running gag. Instead, O’Brian has the two men fit themselves to one other’s blind spots. Eventually Jack automatically stands by to catch Stephen as he inevitably falls between the jolly-boat and the ship’s ladder; Stephen, in turn, can sense from miles away that Jack has given his power of attorney to a landshark."

[sherlocks-freebitch]

‘DEAR ME, STEPHEN,’ she said, lying back, her hair, her black hair wildly astray on the pillow and her blue eyes filled with a splendid light. ‘I have a thousand things to tell you, but you have driven them all out of my mind.’

oh no

oh no jack aubrey is canonically terrible in bed

meanwhile stephen has such incredibly insane game, he keeps bagging the most incredible women

what's his secret, he's five feet six and like 120 lbs soaking wet and kind of ugly and has no hair? well his secret is that he absolutely will not pursue them unless his conscience is clear, because his self-discipline (except for drugs) (oh yeah and duels, he'll duel anything that moves) is absolutely ironbound, and also while his tastes run exclusively to absolutely exquisite women of incredible beauty he also only really admires them for their intrinsic character, their intellect and courage and other not-related-to-physical beauty characteristics, which he praises in them with incredible insight, which i must admit is incredibly effective and would also work on me. also he gives really good gifts. like damn son. okay.

it does not specify this straight out in canon but i have reason to believe he also fucks like a champion. which canon kind of uh. does explicitly specify that jack does not.

sorry jack stans.

i love this series.

[beamorgan]

THE NOISE I JUST MADE

[neosatsuma]

my favorite thing on earth is when he gets crabby about nautical nonsense he's my SPECIALEST little creature

[squashfolded]

[maturiin]

save me boccherini sonata for violin and cello in d major: ii, vivace

[heathcliffgirl1847]

[jadetuin]

Never forgetting the fact that Stephen Maturin is my 78-year-old grandfather's blorbo. He's read ALL but one of the Aubreyad. The movie adaptation is one of his, if not his most, favorite movies of all time. Whenever he brings it up, he talks about how Maturin is "the most interesting character in all of fiction" and lists stuff about the man that he finds interesting - HE DOES NOT USUALLY GO ON RANTS LIKE THIS. The highest praise I have ever heard from him has been for Dr. Stephen Maturin and I think it's hilarious

[thekenobee]

i had a vision