#the LEAST you can do is follow through and show their death mattering to people longer than 10 seconds after the fact

[thenegoteator]

👀 Happy New Year!

happy new year!!!

this was while the Ahsoka show was airing and I was feeling salty about how little Kanan came up initially. it's the "my death is unreasonably downplayed/ignored in recent star wars media" support group. but then we did get the barest of crumbs eventually so I didn't feel it was worth following through

[send me a 👀 in exchange for unposted art from 2023]

[sylus-doll]

Synopsis: You tend to forget that Sylus is a dangerous man. There are moments when reality decides to slap you across your face. It reminds you that he is unhinged— an untamed force of incomparable power.

Warnings: Death; he kills someone. People, actually. Sylus doing his job. Descriptions of violence, blood, etc. Licking of said blood (done by MC [you]. Don't ask why, I'm ashamed). MC (you) lowkey being obsessive of him because why not.

Author's note: Felt unhinged. Comments and reblogs are appreciated. <3

Your time spent with Sylus is always pleasant. Even with the constant banter, filled with your witty remarks and his teasing. It feels right. Everything seems to fall into place when you stand by him. This is natural; to embrace the rough edges of the other and sharpen it with your tongues. It feeds into your unlabeled bond. Two people dancing, never intertwining— not yet. Not lovers but not quite discernable from it.

Sylus is not forceful. At least, not anymore. Very persuasive at best. He knows exactly how to tug your heartstrings. You think it is because Mephisto has been out on “kitten duty” as Sylus so affectionately puts it. Just a nicer terminology of stalking you. He takes the time to learn more about this version of you. Invites you into his territory, his home. Has the twins deliver you clothes, trinkets, and whatever else he knows you love.

Anything that money can or cannot buy, it is yours so long as he thought of you while obtaining it.

“I thought this necklace from the auction would look nice on you. Throw it away if you don't like it.”

Sylus never tells you how much it costs. Or the price of anything he gifts you, for that matter. You know the number is likely to be in the millions. That's what he does— spoil you endlessly and ask that you discard whatever is not to your liking. You've tried protesting, insisting such gifts are far too much. And he does tone it down. But he could never resist adorning you in glorious luxury every once in a while. All he says is that you could stand to be a little greedier.

It goes beyond material pleasures. Sylus knows when you step into the N109 Zone, sent by the association to deal with whatever they need done. Sometimes through Mephisto, sometimes because you tell him. After every mission, whether it ends in success or failure, you'll know he's not far away. Mephisto's incessant caws only cease when you follow him back home— back to Sylus. What welcomes you are a set of red eyes, a quirked brow and a soft tug of his lips. His thumbs in the pocket of his pants, waiting for you as he always did.

Rinse, repeat.

Too comfortable. You've become complacent with that routine, and you are reminded of who exactly Sylus is. Infiltrate a protocore auction; that was your mission this time. An Aether Core fragment was rumoured to be the star of tonight's show. You should have expected Sylus to be here, too. Why would he not be? He was always interested in Aether Cores. The scene before you is familiar, the only difference is the man you've grown accustomed to.

“Well? What's going through your head? Don't tell me you've forgotten what exactly I do, sweetie.” He looks at you, piercing, bored. The term of endearment tastes bitter on your tongue, how ironic.

But you already learned that this expression is simply a mask. Sylus cannot afford to lose anything, so he gives away nothing. Only you could tell, of course you could. His breaths are heavy, deeper. There's a slight tremor in his voice. He stays deadly still as the bodies that lay at his feet. Splatters of blood on his cheek. Crimson coats his fingers, dripping, he's painted an eerie silence of death.

You had been compromised. One of the attendees blew your cover. And soon enough, the guns were pointed at you before you could even raise your fists. Yet, the bullets never came. Black-red mist decays people. Whoever was closest to you met their demise through Sylus's gun to their heads or even his bare hands. You watched the spectacle, rendered incapable. The stark contrast of the Sylus you know and this— this man who is the leader of Onychinus.

So why are you not afraid? This is who Sylus really is. Who he has to be despite the warmth and safety he provides for you. The same hands that cradle you are tainted, the heart he has given to you have rotten bits. A monster, soaked in an ocean of blood that only grows with each day. But it is still a heart, yes? He still chooses to love you, yes?

You walk towards him, stepping on carcasses. His thumbs are in his pockets; he's waiting for you again. Always. This time, you reach for them. This time, you nuzzle into his palms like a cat starved of affection. You look into his eyes and don't break away even as you lick his fingertips clean. Sylus's hands were meant to cradle you, damn whoever's blood decided to taint what's yours.

“You always said I could be greedier with you. Don't start complaining now.”

[witchygagirlwrites]

That Damn Chain

Jay Halstead x Reader

In which you blurt out things in the heat of the moment and reveal some things about yourself and feelings you'd buried for one of your partners

NSFW happenings

How was it that you and Jay had yet again drawn the short straw to go undercover? You loved your partner but you were so damn tired of playing arm candy. The last three undercover ops you'd been dolled out and while normally you would've loved the occasion pampering the fact remained you hated not being able to have a weapon of any sorts on you. That left not only yourself unguarded but Jay's back as well should something go south.

You knew without a shadow of a doubt he’d protect you with his life, same as you him but if something happened where you walked away and he didn’t because he was protecting you? You weren’t sure of a scenario that would end well. No matter how hard you tried to deny it to yourself your partner had won your heart quite a while ago. You’d never admit it under threat of torture. Too much bad waters for him when it came to partners and too much to lose for you when he undoubtedly didn’t feel the same.

“Kim!” you flinched when she poked your eye with the eyeliner and she grimaced “I’m sorry honey!” Voight had lent you his office to get ready considering it had an actual locking door but it also didn’t have a mirror so you had to rely on her help with makeup and hair. You let a small smile slip onto your face “Didn’t hurt as bad as Adam getting the wire tangled in my hair the last time” she cracked a grin at the memory of you chasing him through the tech room and threatening to wax his beard off.

You and Jay were due at the club around ten to meet with Alex Henderson. A tycoon's son with too much money and not enough morals. He’d gotten bored partying it up with small-time drugs and hookers and moved onto trafficking heroin, fentanyl and as of late people. You just needed to get him on tape making a sale and you’d have him for it all. Jay was set up through a C.I, to meet with Alex. Poe was a former friend of Alex’s and when he’d gotten rolled up for suspicion in his girlfriend’s death when she overdosed he’d cut a deal to avoid the death sentence.

“There, you’re ready” she replied after a moment and you smiled. Your breasts felt like they were directly under your chin with how high the combination of a push up bra and corseted top accented them. The skirt you wore barely skimmed your thighs and as for the boots, you’d arrested actual hookers wearing more. “Do I at least get a jacket?” you groaned and she held up the long coat. At least it looked warm “It’s lined” she added as if she was reading your face so you smiled “You’re an angel Kim”

About that time there was a knock on the door followed by Voight asking if you were ready. You cut your eyes at Kim and took a deep breath before walking out. Hailey let out a low whistle “Damn Y/N” you winked at her “From you? I’ll take the catcall”

Adam looked at Kim with wide eyes “Those are a bit…much��  Kevin and Jay walked around the corner and both stopped dead in their tracks. “Jesus” Jay muttered under his breath and Kevin grinned before slapping his shoulder “C’mon Jay. That’s your partner man. Am I the only professional around here?” 

You were too busy practically drooling over what Jay was wearing. He was wearing a suit, tailored to hug his shoulders and the gold chain Will had given him for his last birthday peeking out the collar. After the last time he got shot he swore it was a good luck charm and wore it however often he could. That damn chain was a hazard to your health. The thoughts it caused to pop into your head were never rated to be having about a coworker. 

You plastered a smile on “Kim wired me up. If everyone is through admiring my cleavage can we please get this show on the road?” Voight chuckled “You heard the woman, lets get it done”

You walked into the club next to Jay. He had one arm tucked around your waist, fingers rubbing small circles onto your hip. You noticed he did that anytime you were supposed to be his girl undercover and it made you wonder if that was something he actually did or if it was just a thing to keep him in the mindset of the moment.

You covered his hand with yours and squeezed gently. “You ok Johnny?" you cut your eyes up at him and he smiled “Yeah baby, I’m good” your heart flipped anytime he had to call you baby or sweetheart or darling on these things. You knew they didn’t mean anything more than your false name at the moment.

—---------

Alex stood outside the V.I.P. section with two thick necked guards “Mr Reynolds!” Jay laughed “Man, call me Johnny. Only my old man goes by Mr Reynolds” the two shook then Alex looked at you “And the lovely Gwen is with you I see” Jay pulled you into his side “Always”

Alex motioned behind him “Let’s grab a drink and talk”. You felt Jay’s hand slip into yours as the two of you followed him and the guards. 

When you got to a booth Alex purposely sat where you’d have no choice but to sit next to him. Jay met your eyes before reaching a hand out, you took it and he pulled you down into his lap “Always been your favorite seat, right baby?” you smiled “Always Johnny" he looked over at Alex “Now, lets talk”

The teams’ voices through the com in your ear was your only grounding factor against the fire raging in your core every time Jay slightly shifted his leg. Did he fucking realize what he was doing?  His hand slipped down to gently squeeze your ass all the while never missing a beat at backing Alex into the corner all of you needed him in. You bit down hard enough on your bottom lip that you tasted blood to be able to focus.

You knew the moment the sale was made the unit would come in along with the uniforms waiting around the block to not only clear the club of civilians but to make sure none of Alex’s business partners showed up. “So what are we thinking here? Six kilos and five girls?” Alex said and you heard Voight give the order to surround the club.

—------------

Jay cut his eyes at you as he pulled you down next to him, effectively shielding your body with his. “Yeah” “That's a hefty price you sure you got it?” Alex pushed and Jay stood up, pulling you with him “Look man if you don’t want the money just say so”  “I didn’t say that. I’m just asking if you’ve got that funds for that much heroin and that many girls. It ain't cheap to bring either product in and I don’t want to lose my invested time and money and from the looks of it you put enough money into Gwen here, I mean if you wanna offer a trade” 

Alex took a step towards you and Jay stepped squarely in front of you “If you want to draw another breath you wont even finish that thought” “Point taken” Alex chuckled then looked at his guards “I gotta make some calls. Treat them well”

—-----------

When Alex left Jay eyed the guards then whispered “Go with it” he grabbed your hand and winked at the guard “We’ll be back fellas” the guards eyed the two of you so he slipped his hand down to grab your ass again and you gasped lightly then giggled to cover it up. The guards chuckled “Bathroom is down the hall” 

“What was that?” you asked and he whispered “I think we’re made. He may not be thinking cops but he knows something is up” “Do we need to come in?” Voight asked over the coms about the time the two of you made it to the bathroom. You’d just closed the door when the first bullets hit just above your head before Jay tackled you to the ground, covering your body with his.

“CHICAGO POLICE DEPARTMENT” you heard ringing out from around the club. Jay pulled his gun from his lower back and slowly crouched over you, his chain slipping free of his shirt to dangle in front of your face as he asked “Are you ok?” you weren’t sure what the hell came over you but when you looked up into those blue eyes after such a burst of adrenaline with that damn chain dangling you blurted out “I’ve had a few dreams in this position but they never started with us getting shot at”

His eyes widened before a grin slipped onto his face “Either you’re fine or delirious. We’ll figure that out later” he pulled your backup from where he’d carried it in on his left ankle and pressed it into your hand. At your questioning look he shrugged “You hate not having a weapon nearby” then pulled you to your feet so you could both go out and meet your unit.

 For the next few days you barely looked Jay in the eye, hoping like hell he had forgotten the dream comment. Maybe he’d chalk it up to weird shit people said when adrenaline hit?

You should’ve known better when Friday night found you at Mollys. You were talking to Ethan and April at the bar while Stella made your drink. The week had been a little crazy so you were happy to relax. 

You knew the presence anywhere the moment a hand slipped around your waist “Hey partner” you cut your eyes up “Hey Halstead” he nodded to April and Ethan before passing a twenty over your head to Stella to pay for your drink and his own beer. He leaned down close enough, his breath caused a shiver to run through you when he whispered “Can we talk?”

You nodded, thanking Stella for your drink and telling April you’d see her later. Jay kept his hand at your lower back as the two of you walked over to a booth in the far corner. You slid in and cut your eyes up at him “Is this you making fun of me? Because if so I swear..” he grinned “No, this is me asking about those dreams”

You raised an eyebrow and he shrugged “What was I doing?” you leaned across the table to flick that damn chain out of his shirt before saying “Well that thing was dangling in my face for an entirely different reason besides you tackling me to keep me from getting shot” he damn near choked on his beer at that.

You laughed “Jay, chill. It’s no big deal. People have weird sex dreams. Doesn’t mean anything” his eyes flicked up to yours “So you don’t have any feelings for me? Because it’s been hard as hell acting like I don’t have feelings for you” “What?” you asked, sitting your drink down on the table.

He grinned and leaned over to grab your hand “I’ve wanted you for so damn long but because of my past relationship with a partner..” you shrugged “Just because you and her didn’t work out doesn’t mean anything” he stared at you for a moment before saying “I want you so damn much but I don’t want to rush things” you smiled slightly “Well in our job we could get killed tomorrow?” 

He shook his head but that smile he gave you was nothing short of gorgeous “Are you trying to get me in bed?” you took a sip of her drink then nodded “Yeah, I am” he nodded then took a swig of his beer before standing up “Just making sure” and grabbed your hand.

“You’re sure about this?” Jay asked as the two of you stumbled into his apartment, barely breaking away from each other long enough to make it inside the door and get it closed behind you before he had you pushed back against it as his mouth worked the sensitive skin of your neck.

You gasped when he hit a particular spot, hands digging into the material of his shirt “I’m sure. Take your damn shirt off Jay” he pulled away from you and grinned “You’re always so bossy” before slipping his shirt over his head and tossing it. You pushed him back from you a little and he looked concerned until you smiled and ran your hands over his chest “Fuck Halstead” you couldn’t help but to be a little dumbfounded at having him in front of you like this. He grinned “I’m yours” and pulled you back into his arms, dropping another kiss to your lips before tugging you towards his bedroom. “I think you said something about wanting to be in a position with my chain dangling in your face?” you fucking whimpered in response and he chuckled “Oh I’m gonna have fun with you baby. You make such sweet sounds to be so mean to me at work”

He walked backwards into the room and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling you down into his lap. You straddled him and just the way he looked up at you could’ve made you come apart. His hands went to the hem of your shirt “Can I take this off?” you pulled it off yourself and tossed it across the room. He smiled “Look at you. Looks even better than that damn top was showing” his mouth lowered to your clothed chest, kissing across the soft mounds of flesh “What’s better is only I get to see you like this”

He reached behind you and slipped your bra off with ease before his hands came up to cup your breasts. “Damn” you moaned lightly at just how gentle he was being, like he was afraid you’d break.  One hand left your breast to slip around your throat, not applying pressure just controlling your attention. “If we do this baby, know it means I’m yours and you’re mine. I don’t share well” 

You nodded and he shook his head “Words baby, I need words” “I’m yours Jay” you spoke and he leaned forward, just shy of kissing you before saying “Damn right you are” he turned, flipping the two of you so your back was on the bed and he was on top of you. Your eyes flicked down to his chain and he chuckled “Does that turn you on?” you nodded and he grinned “It’s turned you on the whole time I’ve had it, hasn’t it?”

“It has” you admitted and he grinned before catching your lips in a bruising kiss. He moved from your lips, across your jaw then down your neck. The stark comparison of the warmth of his lips with the cool metal of the chain had you squirming under him. One of his hands went to your hips, pinning them.

He kissed across your chest, taking his time to mark both breasts “So everyone knows they’re his” when he got to your jeans he looked up at you and winked before slipping them off your hips. He started at your left ankle, kissing up and stopping just shy of where you needed him before giving the right leg the same treatment.

Just when you were sure you’d die from teasing he licked one long stripe through your folds and when your hips bucked up and fingers went to his hair he kissed your inner thigh and said “That’s my girl” before diving in.

—------------------

You’d had men go down on you before but Jay was an entirely different story. The way his tongue worked at your clit, fingers finding their way inside of you to move in tandem as he worked you over that edge back to back until you were pushing at his shoulders begging him “Please Jay! It’s too much”

When he pulled back to look at you he smiled before kissing your trembling thighs “How ya feeling?” you curled a finger at him and his smile turned into a full blown smirk as he kissed his way up your body before finally making it to your mouth, letting you taste yourself on him.

You could feel his hard cock pressing on your thigh so you spread your legs a little further to give him the invitation. He pressed his forehead against yours as he moved one hand to line himself up with your opening before slowly slinking in. When he was finally bottomed out you both let out a moan. 

—------------------

He held himself up once he was sure you were ready and gave a tentative thrust.  When your response was to grip his shoulders he buried his face into your neck for just a breath before it was like a thought occurred to him. He pulled back and grabbed your hands then pulled them up over your head,holding them in place as his eyes met yours “I wanna see you fall apart” he grunted and you felt yourself clench around him. 

His eyes fluttered at the feeling “Just like that then huh baby?” he sat a rough pace that meant with each roll of his hips you could feel every ridge and vein of his cock as he pounded into you.  You were itching to touch him but he still held your hands, that damn chain in your face as he worked you closer and closer to that edge.

When his fingers found your clit and he started to rub tight circles onto it you felt that pressure that had been building inside of you burst and you came with a loud moan of his name. The feeling of your orgasm pushed him over the edge as well, burying himself inside of you with one final thrust.

He finally released your hands as he buried his face in the bend of your neck, both of you working to get your breathing back to normal. Your hands went to his shoulders, smoothing down the muscles as your lips kissed any skin you could reach. 

He laughed lightly and leaned up to press a kiss to your lips “A damn chain got us to admit how we felt” you shrugged and tapped it “I happen to like that damn chain” he looked down to where he was still buried hip deep in you “Yeah, I like it pretty good myself”

[yuespropagandablog]

Hello esteemed mutual. If you are reading this, then that means my propaganda is working. But you might still have questions, so I am here to answer them.

What is Falsettos?

A damn good musical.

But time to get serious. It's a sung-through musical written by William Finn and James Lapine, with Lapine also writing the music and lyrics. Falsettos is a two-act musical, like many, but it's important here because Falsettos is actually two musicals in one. The first act is March of the Falsettos, and the second act is Falsettoland. These are the last two installments of the Marvin Trilogy. The first part, In Trousers, flopped on off-Broadway and is also not part of Falsettos. Are you following?

The first acts centers on a Jewish man named Marvin (the main character of the Marvin Trilogy, who would've thought) and his homosexual relation with Whizzer, and how that impacts the family. He's left his wife Trina and son Jason to be with Whizzer, but Marvin is also Marvin, and loves to have a tight-knit family that includes all of them, but fails to see how his wish impacts the others. The second act takes place two years after the first and it's all about Jason's bar mitzvah, but oh, oh no, it's a homosexual story set in the 80s. Yeah folks, I am going to be upfront: this musical does not have a happy ending. Spoiler. I know. But I just want people to know what they're getting themselves into.

The show has a lot to say about gay life in the 70s and 80s, gender roles and masculinity, traditional family, illness, and Judaism. Yes, you cannot separate the Judaism from this show, no matter how hard a Spanish production tries.

Where can I watch it?

The original Falsettos debuted in 1992 on Broadway. I know it from its 2016 Broadway revival. There are, uh, slime tutorials for both (and also for In Trousers if you're interested), and the 2016 version also got a proshot that was aired on PBS, so they did have to censor some language. RIP "You save lives and I save chicken fat, I can't fucking deal with that", you will forever be missed. This link totally definitely does not lead to a YouTube upload of that proshot, what do you mean?

There are also a bunch of other productions, sometimes with footage, sometimes not. I actually saw the Dutch version in 2021 in Amsterdam (probably while I had COVID, but in my defense, I tested negative before I boarded my train!)

Is there a trailer or something?

Yes, here's a trailer for the proshot.

Here is their Tony performance, which is also my favourite song of the show:

(They did take out the "Lighbulb up the ass" and "I can't fucking deal with that", because America is America. But at least we got Andrew Rannell's boner in return?)

And for funsies, here's the Tony Awards performance of the OBC:

(They did censor the words "homosexuals" and "lesbians", unless that was the original lyrics. I dunno. I am not very familiar with the original one.)

You implied AIDS. Are there other content warnings?

Yes. AIDS will be the main theme of the second act. You can ignore it by just turning off the show after the song What More Can I Say, but that is obviously not the full show. There's also some period-typical homophobia, as in in act one, Jason is afraid that his father's homosexuality is a fatal hereditary disease. There are also a lot of dysfunctional relationship dynamics in act one, including one instance of physical abuse. Act two has the AIDS of it all and because of that, the major character death warning.

But is there also fun to be had?

Yes, definitely! One thing that makes Falsettos a good show is the tonal whipslash. Both act one and act two start out as the funniest shit you've ever seen and then BAM, drama. It is kind of impressive how the show does that. It has stellar comedic songs like Four Jews in a Room Bitching, My Father's A Homo/Everyone Tells Jason to See a Psychiatrist, I'm Breaking Down, Jason's Therapy, Year of the Child, Miracle of Judaism, The Baseball Game, A Day in Falsettoland, Everybody Hates His Parents and whatever the fuck March of the Falsettos (the song) is.

The first half of both acts you can't stop laughing and the second half of both acts you can't stop crying. That's Falsettos, baby!

Does the music slap?

Oh yeah. It is a fully sung-through musical. If that's not your jam, then you're better off skipping it. It also has a more "traditional" musical theatre sound, whatever that might mean. As you saw in the previous section, it has a lot of great comedic songs, with stellar lyrics like "Look, look, look, look, look, it's a lesbian from next door!/Followed by her lover who's a lesbian from next door too!", "Hepa-hepa-hepatitis-hepatitis?", "We're watching Jewish boys who cannot play baseball play baseball", "You have paintings of dicks!/Don't talk to me about taste!", "Lightbulbs in the ass!", the entire "You are going to kill your mother" section, "Homosexuals!!!!!" and of course the opening line of the entire show "Four Jews in a room bitching". And many more. But don't be fooled, because this song also has some emotional bangers (mostly in the second part of the acts due to the aforementioned tonal shift).

Are there German characters in this musical?

Mendel's last name Weisenbachfeld sounds German. Is that close enough?

[thefirstknife]

Literally every time I tune in for a story update and think "there's no way I'll be taking emotional damage this week" and then I do.

First I really like the added context about what an Echo is, from Ikora:

Genocide. Thousands of civilisations across the universe, all visited by the Black Fleet. All lost to the violence of the final shape. That's where this Echo comes from. At least, that's our theory. Reports from the Pale Heart, readings on the Valence emanating from the Traveler... Everything we faced when we stared down the Witness and broke its fleet. At first, we didn't know what to call them. But Echoes seemed apt. Memories from the victims of the Pyramids, held by the Darkness... then coalesced by the Light into artifacts as sharp and fatal as their pain. If Darkness is memory, and Light is form... What else could they be? But... there's still so much we don't know. Is this the only one? What forgotten people gave form to this Echo? What was their final cry at their end? For control? A means to turn back their oppressors? My Hidden will keep searching for whatever answers the Witness' death can give us... hopefully they number more than the questions it left behind. But we need to stop the Conductor and secure the Echo. Guardian, descend into Nessus. Massive amounts of radiolaria has been diverted beneath the planet's crust. We need to find out what the Vex are building there.

I think it's fair to assume that the memory of the Qugu is what formed this Echo then. That's fascinating also because of what other species we might learn about in the next two episodes.

Psion mention:

Show us the Psions. What are they doing. Don't throw these hints at me, at the same time with Otzot and OXA hints.

And then the emotional damage??? First Saint on the holoprojector:

Guardian. I hear that you are hard at work on Nessus, following the Echo and the Conductor. I know you do this in part for me, but... I do not know if I am worth the trouble. I was pulled through Nessus like a toy on a string. The Conductor's words still echo in my mind, "A copy of a copy of a copy." Osiris pushed through time to find his Saint-14. [sighs] He said he was careful, but... he reached blindly, and pulled out... only me. And no... I live a life tat does not belong to me. I am something left over from a broken timeline... a remainder. The Conductor whispered I should be thrown away... A solution as simple as, correcting an error. And maybe... that would- Ah! I-I do not know what to think anymore.

Saint. "Not worth the trouble"? Saint, I personally walked through the corridors of time to get you out. I had to see your dead body with my own two eyes. I need to tell him this. He has to know. Oh my god.

But also. Osiris did not reach blindly. I am jumping off a cliff! He spent so much time and effort trying to find the right one in the right moment. That was the whole point. But Saint doesn't know this because Osiris never told him exactly what he did. If they don't mention everything we've done in Dawn, I am just going to walk into traffic. This Saint knows that we saved him. That we gave him the shotgun. We saw him in several different moments of his life and he carried the shotgun through: this is important because he died with it originally. So we know it's the right one. That's the only reason the Sundial worked out even; because we're tied to Saint via a paradox.

And then the radio. WHAT is happening.

Osiris: You're only doing this to hurt yourself, and I will not be a part of it. Saint-14: Osiris. Answer the question. I need to know. Osiris: It doesn't matter! Not like this. Saint-14: It matters to me. Please. How did I first tell you that I loved you? Osiris: Saint... [sighs] You had asked me for something, some tactical report. I gave it to you, and you thanked me, and-and you said that you loved me. You said it as if you had, already said it a thousand times before. I was not ready to say it in return, but... it was not long until I was. Saint-14: That is not... I do not remember it this way. That is not what happened in my... my simulation. We were together in the Tower, overlooking the City. Talking about... something small. And I said what I felt in that moment. And my Osiris did not hesitate to say the same. Osiris: "Your Osiris?" Saint, you love me. It doesn't matter how or-or where that began. Not in such fine detail. Saint?

I reiterate. What is happening. We know that the story Osiris told is true because we got it as a lore tab. And we also know that we saved the right Saint. We didn't pick one randomly as he thinks, Osiris and the YW went to great lengths to do this. So what's going on. Did the Conductor mess him up? Saint has not, until now, exhibited any issues with memory and has never had different memories from Osiris or anyone else. What did she do to him when he was yoked? Did she use the power over Vex to mess with his memories? Implant memories the Vex might have in the network about him from other timelines? I'm losing it.

Speaking of the Conductor, we got a firm confirmation it's Maya in the lore tab from Polyphony. And it's MSund12 so that also tells us which Maya; one of the copies from the Vex Network. It also details stuff about her shock upon learning about the Collapse and all that was lost and how humanity never truly recovered. She thinks she can... "help" by using the Vex and simulations. This also links to the mysterious lore tabs on the exotic items from the season pass.

Anyway, I'm perishing.

[pitchprowler27]

Hearts On The Sidelines Part 3

Part three is here and present. Smut for sure in the later parts. You already know Top Leah.

Its been a week since Ellie last saw Leah at her game. Its something that Ellie can’t stop thinking about, again. If you were to ask her she certainly has not taken the upmost care of the jersey. Bobby thinks she’s being a bit ridiculous but if feeding into this meant Ellie has a chance of getting laid then who is he to stop her. The two have had some pretty shitty shifts after that night. It seemed like no matter what they did they just couldn’t save anyone. Death is not something that the two are unfamiliar with but its something they haven’t dealt with as much. Ellie has held dying soldiers hands in the heat of battle. She’s patched up many of men in a storm of a fire fight but the sting of losing someone at home hurt more then she was able to describe. She was known for stitching people up its how she got her nickname “Stitch” from the people in her platoon. Bobby was known for patching other up hence the name “Patch”, together the two were Stitch and Patch. They helped many people when they were Army medics and they would never forget them. However, being away from that scene has made the weight in Ellie’s heart lighter. Something she is ashamed about. She shouldn’t feel thankful for being away from the people she saved but being around them always made her think of the ones she couldn’t. Ellie does her best to forget about the ones she couldn’t save. 

That’s how her and Bobby ended up here at a club dancing and drinking. The two needed to blow off some steam after the week from hell they had. Ellie is in black skinny jeans cuffed at the ankle, some white air force ones and a white crop top. She has her hair in a half up half bun look with lose waves. Bobby is in a very similar fit to Ellie that showed off how good his arms looked. Blue jeans and a black shirt that hugged his arms. He was on the prowl to get some dick tonight and Ellie was here to support that. She on the other hand just wanted to do as many Green Tea shots as she could and dance the night away. 

So there Ellie was in the middle of the dance floor letting the liquor take her anxiety away. She felt just enough buzzed that she still felt in control. Ellie could see Bobby in the corner of the bar making out with some lucky man and she knew that she’d be going home without her friend. It didn’t matter to her she knew he would be safe. Just as she was about to turn and get another drink something - well someone caught her eye. Leah Fucking Williamson. Of course she was wearing her signature smirk while not discreetly looking Ellie up and down. To her credit Ellie did her best to be discrete but Leah looked damn good, especially with her abs peaking out from her crop top. 

“Well well well pretty girl what are the odds seeing you here tonight?” 

Ellie stared at her long and hard to the point Leah thought maybe she didn’t hear her over the music and was leaning closer to her to repeat herself. “Are you following me?” Ellie blurts out. 

Of course Leah laughs at her because Ellie always seems to have a knack for making her laugh when she isn’t trying to. 

“I should be asking you that pretty girl, you’re everywhere I turn” 

Ellie continued to stare at her and then finally, in one alcohol induced brave moment blurts out “Well if you’re going to continue to follow me you could at least buy me a shot and dance with me” 

Leah looked impressed at the smaller girl in front of her “Feeling brave tonight? I think I can buy a pretty girl a shot and dance with her” Leah did just that. She lead Ellie back to the bar with a hand on the small of her back. Ellie could feel how close Leah was, could feel her breath on her and it made her knees weak. She is so thankful that the alcohol coursing through her is protecting her from her awkwardness. While they are waiting for a shot Leah tries to strike up conversation with the girl. Her front is pressed into Ellie’s back trapping her in between the bar and Leah. “What dragged you out here tonight?” When she asked Ellie could feel her breath on her face making her shiver a bit. 

“My weak has been a shit sandwich. What brings Arsenal football superstar out tonight?” Ellie felt proud of herself for not being a stuttering fool in front of the girl. If only Bobby could see her smooth moves now. 

“You think I’m a superstar eh? I didn’t know you were such a fan Ellie or else I would’ve signed the jersey I gave you” Ellie didn’t have to turn around to know that Leah was smirking at her. Ellie wonders where she gets this endless cockiness and confidence from. Wonders if she has any to spare her. “Whats a soup sandwich?”

Ellie actually laughs because she’s never had anyone ask her that before. Everyone in the army knew a soup sandwich was code for a cluster fuck. Ellie leans back into the girl behind her “Its like if soup was a sandwich it would be messy. Its code for cluster fuck. My week as been one big old cluster fuck”. 

Before the blonde could answer her the bartender presented them their Green Tea shots much to Ellie’s delight. They quickly downed them and Leah looked at Ellie the whole time with a smirk on her face watching the smaller girl enjoy herself. Even though they only encountered each other a few times it was nice to see her so carefree. Ellie grabbed the blondes hand and dragged her to the dance floor “You promised you’d dance with me!” 

Leah just laughs at the girls antics and lets her take the lead. She doesn’t want to push too far especially if the girl had been drinking. Leah may come off a little cocky and a playboy vibe but she was a gentle woman first and foremost. Ellie is swaying her hips to the music her back to Leah’s front just like it was at the bar. 

“Are you having fun pretty girl?” She heard Leah ask close to her ear. Ellie was having fun and she was glad she ran into her. She was especially bad she had liquid courage on her side. She turned around and wrapped her arms around Leah’s neck much to her surprise. 

“I’m really glad I got to see you tonight.” 

“Really? What is that?” Leah asked close to her yet again so she could hear her over the sound of the club. 

“You’re making my soup sandwich less soupy” Ellie mumbles out. She cringes a bit at what she said but feels at ease when she sees Leah laughing at her. They stare at each other no one speaking. You could feel the tension between them, it was palpable, hot. They were still swaying to music but only focused on one another. They slowly lean in closer to each other, “I really want you to kiss me right now” Ellie admits softly, almost too soft. 

“Who am I to deny a pretty girl?” Leah leans down to connect their lips when Ellie hears a familiar voice she wasn’t expecting to hear tonight. One that made her blood run cold. 

“Stitch! Stitch is that you?” Ellie can feel her whole body tense up and all the fun / ease leave her body. She’s clenching her jaw to the point that it may crack some teeth under the pressure. Leah can sense the mood change and holds her tightly to herself. 

“Do you know him Ellie?” Leah is trying to catch her eye to see if she’s okay. Update: Ellie is not okay. She gently pushes Leah back a bit but wont look her in the eye. She stands up straight with her shoulders back and turns to the voice calling her name. 

“Stitch it is you!” A tall man around Bobby’s build comes over to the two girls. He grabs Ellie in a big bear hug squeezing her tight. “I can’t believe I’m seeing you here!” 

Ellie just took a step back looking at the man “Yeah, Patch - I mean Bobby and I live out here now.” She tries to keep it short and sweet. She wants this conversation to end immediately and forget the night has ever happened. Her once fun carefree night has taken a sharp turn she doesn’t want to go down. “How’d you end up out here?” 

The two make small talk and the man in questions turns to Leah “I’m sorry I’m Mack, Ellie saved my life once or twice over seas its nice to meet you” They shake hands and Leah looks at Ellie with an expression she can’t quiet place. 

“Ellie is quiet impressive isn’t she?” Leah is looking at Ellie when she asks but Mack answers anyway. 

“Oh hell yeah. We didn’t call her Stitch for nothing. She was almost always able to stitch us up. She even took a round for me. I’ll never be able to thank her enough” before the conversation could continue someone was calling Mack back over to their group. He squeezes the smaller girl one more time before disappearing. 

Ellie, for her part, is doing her best to act normal even though she can’t feel her legs. She can feel her heartbeat in her throat and her hands get clammy. The room is spinning, and its not alcohol induced, its pure panic. She looks at Leah and can see her mouth moving but can’t hear the words coming out of her mouth. She turns around and makes a beeline for the door. She makes it outside and feels the cold air surprise her. Its not enough to shock her system into getting its act together. 

Her breathing is labored and she can feel the tears coming down her face. The flashbacks of being at war and trying to save everyone hit her like a ton of bricks. She’s doing everything she can think of to calm down. She knows she’s in trouble when her hands start shaking. She’s just mumbling to herself “please please please stop” She almost has a heart attack when she feels a hand on her back. She quickly spins around and sees its Leah. 

“Hey hey hey” Leah is trying to make eye contact with the younger girl “whats going on?” 

Ellie just keeps shaking her head “I cant -“ She’s gasping for air. Pleading for her lungs to work but they seem to be betraying her. “Leah please” she looks at her hands shaking “I can’t help if they don’t stop shaking please make them stop shaking” 

Leah grasps her hands and holds them close to her. She’s finally able to get Ellie to look her in the eye “Hey. You are safe with me Ellie. You are okay. Follow my breathing okay? You’re safe and you don’t need to save anyone right now” She continued to coach her into steady breathing. Ellie’s spiraling took a few moments to calm down but when she did she felt spent. She didn’t even realize she was leaning her forehead onto Leah’s shoulder. To Leah’s credit she stood steady and let the girl get her composure and did not care how long it would take. 

“I told you my week has been a soup sandwich” Ellie mumbles out into Leah’s shoulder making the older girl laugh. 

She pulls away and holds Ellie’s face in her hands and wipes her tears away gently “Oh pretty girl what am I going to do with you?” 

“Pretend the last thirty minutes of the night didn’t happen so its not weird?” Ellie cautiously is looking at the blonde but sees nothing but adoration in her eyes. 

“Only if you give me your number.” 

Ellie is shocked by the boldness but wordless hands over her phone. Leah puts her number in her phone and calls it so Ellie could have her number. The two make small talk why they waited for Ellie’s Uber to come to pick her up. Just as it was about to arrive Ellie says “I really wish you would’ve kissed me”

Leah looks at her fondly and leans down and kisses her on the forehead. Ellie closes her eyes and enjoys the moment, unsure if she will ever have one like this again. Leah opens the door for Ellie to get into. “Until next time pretty girl, and text me when you get home!” 

As the Uber is pulling away Ellie can’t help but smile a bit. Even though her week was a soup sandwich she thinks it might’ve been worth it if it meant she got to be that close to Leah. 

[lordofmelancholy]

Thoughts about Arcane Season2 and "bad writing" (Ramblings)

When you sit down and just think about it for a moment without people screaming in your ear

a lot of writing choices in Arcane make sense and works

Because they don't follow traditional tropes

they follow Real Life

Sometimes in life you dont talk to someone when you should Sometimes in life you dont make right decisions, or make right decisions people will think are wrong Sometimes in life bad people get away with things that you believe they shouldn't Sometimes in life people DIE in war you never expect Sometimes in life you dont NEED words to apologize, you need ACTIONS, especially in a world where words can be twisted and untrustworthy and not worth the dirt on your shoes.

I love Arcane SO MUCH because it does what no show really does anymore. It doesnt follow trope, it doesn't follow immediate reconciliation, or conversation or WHATEVER. It just lets these characters LIVE (and die) just like how the world turns.

No one is out of character because a person CAN NEVER BE out of character. You are never the same person day in and day out, your life REFUSES to allow you to do that because if it did you would NEVER adapt to change.

Its how you adapt to that change that is important Take Cait and how she is in Season 2 for an example

I don’t think it’s bad writing Not entirely One of the reasons I like Arcane is cause NO ONE is truly good or bad

(Cept maybe the few like Loris, Ekko)

Everyone is just morally grey, believing their doing right, but going about it in ways that aren’t

When they do right, they do right

When they do wrong you know it, but in the end I love that cause no creature, let alone people are ever one dimensional

But the ISSUES I’m having with the Caitvi side of the fandom is their ERASING what makes them good characters which is that MORAL dilemma side. So often you see people try to brush their issues under the rug, or water them down

AND THATS NOT WHAT ARCANE IS ABOUT it never was

Cait was Cassandra’s daughter The one person whose been there for her

Her death was basically what Silco said

It was the undoing of her daughter DO I like Cait

Yes I do She’s the perfect blend of morally delayed character that I love. But I don’t like what the fandom is DOING to her

Cait didn’t even honor her mother correctly when she went about her revenge

It doesn’t MATTER if she gassed just the chembarons and left the civilians alone It doesn’t MATTER if she thought she was doing right

Because she did something that Piltover ACTIVELY PROMISED THEY WOULD NEVER DO

She USED the gas, she used GREY

Piltover may have been absolute SHIT to Zaun But they at least KNEW that even the gas was too much Knew that if they used it they would hurt more then just the people they were aiming for

GAS doesn’t discriminate

It’s why even in the deadliest of war’s only the most vicious or determined to win EVER reverted to chemical warfare

Cait did it on a whim

But in the same breathe YOU cant only blame her

Blame Ambessa too She took a vulnerable person. Knew how to twist the tragedy she went through and turn it into something with her advantage

But people also seem to forget that Cait STILL had a moral code and she was learning from her mistakes

She CLOSED and forbade the use of the cells that Vi was subject to during her prison time

She called out Ambessa for instigating fights

SHE WAS FIGHTING WITH AMBESSA, turning her back on her when things got to terrible It wasn’t just

oh vi stared at her once and called her a petname

NO she was actively LOOKING for a way out from under Ambessa

and she found it

And it’s because of that I have to agree media literacy is at a all time low

Because if you ACTIVELY WATCH THE SHOW you realize things are not as face value cut-dry as they looked

S1 Cait NEVER left

S1 Cait is still present in S2 Cait

But the issue is we are seeing a side of Cait that is loosing her way and aligning herself with people who MAY act like their doing her right but aren’t and now she’s stuck in this loop of hell after hell after hell

Until the ONE greatest thing in her life, something that’s been constant in its support and love but not afraid to fight back with her when she thinks she’s wrong

came back

Vi came back during a time where Cait was once again lost in not knowing how to fix what she did wrong because now she was turning on Ambessa and had no one at her side

Vi literally just said cupcake and cait’s eyes widened to the point SHE ACTIVELY CRIES shortly after Vi called her that. Her eyes legit water if you look closely at her turn her head away.

And the best part is is Vi didnt just jump back into being steady with Cait

She didn’t trust her

until Caitlyn showed her she could be

[auspicioustidings]

Bannockburn

Summary: Your boyfriend Johnny has come home in a strange mood, and you are about to get your shit rocked at Bannockburn.

Technically, if you squint, a sequel to Savage set just over 700 years later. Like I will perhaps write a proper sequel at some point, but you can blame Bunny for this one.

Words: 3.6k

CW: CNC, smut, implied character death

You were getting nervous. You were getting really nervous. There were two Johnny’s and you never knew what one you were getting when he came home from a mission. Most of the time you got your Johnny, sweet and loving and tackling you to the bed with a laugh while he showed you how much he missed you. But sometimes whatever happened out on mission got his blood up. Whatever he usually did to get himself settled and out of war mode didn’t take. Sometimes you got the Savage Johnny, the one who heard your English accent and became more animal than man. The one who went into such thick Scots that you hardly understood what he was growling into your ear as he took you. 

Usually you knew what Johnny you had the moment he walked through the door. Not this time. This time he seemed like he was boiling with energy under the surface, but he kissed you nonetheless and ate dinner with you and held you as you slept. When he got you both up and packed into the car the next morning for a trip you had the sense to at least be a little worried. Now, hand held in his as you listened to the guide, you had some inkling that you might be in for it. 

“Now King Edward the second invaded as a result of Bruce’s demand to his people to recognise him as their King. He summoned 25,000 infantry and 2000 horses, the largest ever army to invade Scotland. Bruce only had command of 6000 men.”

You could feel the blood draining from your face as the guide went further into the background of the battle. Around about the time she briefly mentioned how Wallace had been hanged, drawn and quartered, limbs displayed in different cities, just shy of ten years before the Battle of Bannockburn, you absolutely knew what Johnny you had on your hands. And this Johnny? There was nothing you could do to save yourself from this Johnny. This Johnny was taking in every word, ready to punish you for your ancestors' transgressions against his. 

You were trying to pay attention, but your eyes were darting around trying to pinpoint any little nooks that might spell danger if he got you in them. Only that was dangerous in itself, because the first time you felt your attention drift from what was being said Johnny had let go of your hand and moved to instead hold you firm by the back of the neck, fingers massaging a little too hard in warning. That got you to pay rapt attention to all of it, to the whole history of the Scottish wars of Independence as it related to Bannockburn. 

It was strange sometimes, you and Johnny. There were times like now when you would be learning about the history of your countries and it felt like some long forgotten memory. There were times when you met his Lieutenant and swore you knew him from somewhere. Like there was some ancient part of you that trusted them when they fought together to watch each other's backs. No matter what Johnny you got, you held such a deep love for him that it scared you sometimes. Your heart twisted as they described what the battle would have been like for the soldiers, the sights and sounds and weapons. It must have been awful. 

You were stuck on it. Stuck on the image of a Johnny with a sword on the battlefield. That was your mistake, zoning out and just following along when he led you out to the grounds. Only when you had been walking for a while did you realise how far you were getting from the safety of a building full of people.

“Where are we going?”

“Dinae pay any attention at all did ye? Must naw have been interesting tae ye learning about how my people battered yours when they tried tae grind us intae nothing.”

“No, I was paying attention. Of course I was” you said, trying to be meek and quell some of his building fury. 

“Couldnae even hunt a bunny without some English noble claiming it wisnae our right. Punishing us” he ranted before turning to you with a feral look in his eye. “Cannae stop me from hunting one right now though can they? Ye going tae run for me wee bunny?”

Fuck. He looked ready to tear into your throat with his teeth. You felt every bit a prey animal, eyes darting around to find a way out of this. The woods. There were woods here. That was where he had been leading you while you had been busy getting stuck on the idea of him as some ancient warrior fighting to the death. Gillies Hill. The guide had told you about it, how the Scottish had made their camp here. It was where they had attacked from.

And it was where you found yourself sprinting through, heart pounding. Your logical mind knew it was a mistake, you running only meant he could chase. You should have just stayed where you were, tried to talk him down. You were stumbling and tripping, trying to get your bearings as the woods became dense around you. Every snap of a twig or sway of a branch sent you darting away in the other direction until you were shaking from exhaustion and no small amount of mounting terror.

You had never been hunted like this. Johnny had been rough with you before in the warmth of your own home, had fucked you into the bed like he was trying to mould you permanently to him. But this was a different creature entirely. This was the monster under the surface that you only caught glimpses of, that you never thought you would meet face to face. The woods were silent of another human, had you managed to escape him?

“Yer naw even trying little bunny, ye want me tae catch ye is that it? Slut.”

His breath was hot on your ear and you choked on any response you had tried to come up with. How had he gotten right behind you without a sound? You were running again, tripping and scraping your knees but clawing your way back to your feet to keep going. The little summer dress was not suited for this, but at least you were wearing boots. At least Johnny had told you to wear boots this morning. 

It was with a sickening dread that you realised he had planned this. He knew you would be running from him, knew he wanted you in a dress for easy access but boots for fleeing into the woods. At least you knew that your Johnny was still in there somewhere, enough to care about you not breaking an ankle. Not enough to care about breaking you in other ways. 

“Aww wee English princess got her knees all scraped up? All yer kinfolk are going tae ken how ye love getting on them for good Scottish cock when they see the marks. Wee whore down in the dirt fucking gagging on it, crying over how much ye love it.”

You couldn’t properly tell what direction his voice was even coming from. The shame of his words was flooding you with a sickly humiliation that only increased when your body reacted differently to how it should have. When you throbbed with need for him. 

“I’m not! That isn’t what’s happening!”

You were flustered and scared and needy and felt like you were yelling at nothing as you kept catching sight of him on your periphery only to turn and find nobody there. 

“Naw? Slick is practically running down yer plush fucking thighs princess, bet yer clenching down on nothin’. Dinnae even have tae catch ye dae I? Could just wait until ye come crawling tae me, begging me tae claim ye. Fucking pleading for it right here, right where my army celebrated before decimating yours.”

His words sent a shiver up your spine. Out here felt removed from time, it really did feel like you were betraying something by finding yourself drawn to this savage. By imagining that his prediction would prove true, that you’d beg for him. You couldn’t, it would be too much, too shameful. So you kept stumbling through the woods even when the deep tenor of his voice rang through in a mocking little song.

God he had translated this for you once. Told you that brose and butter was a euphemism, that it was about fucking a girl full of cum. It had made you blush and laugh at the time when he playfully sang it over to you now that you understood the meaning, but now? Fuck now it just scared the hell out of you with how the words were tinged with a promise. This was hardly playful, he really meant to hold you down and shove himself inside you out here in the woods where anyone could walk by. 

“We can’t! John please, not here” you pleaded, pausing to try and find where he was. “I… you were gone for months, I’ve not…”

He had made you promise before he left that you’d save yourself for him, wouldn’t even put your own fingers inside yourself while he was gone. And you hadn’t. Fuck you would be so tight now, not ready for him to take you hard. Had he known even then that this was the plan?

“Maiden are ye? Scared it’s going tae hurt, princess? It will, did they naw teach ye that we’re animals? We dinnae treat wee English lassies the way yer own men would. Ye’ll get treated the way ye should, like a fucking whore. And ye’ll take it won’t ye? Ye’ll take it wherever I want tae give it tae ye.”

Fuck, you were starting to slip away to whereever he was. You were starting to feel less like yourself and more like the poor English maiden being hunted by the enemy. The bunny being hunted by the hound. Starting to drift away into pure animal instinct, pure fear and arousal. You could hardly breathe now, feeling tears prick at your eyes.

“Please…” you sobbed quietly, not even sure what you were begging for.

And then he was there, towering over you and wrapping a hand around your throat, thumb beneath your chin to tilt your head and force you to look at him. 

“Wonder whit they’d think of ye begging so pretty for the enemy. Cannae help yerself can ye?” he said, as if fascinated by you, slipping his other hand up your dress and under your panties. “Fucking English slut. Y’er dripping.”

Your reaction to those words was violent and unexplainable. It made your legs shake and your pussy clench painfully hard. It was confusing how much it affected you, causing such a flood of wetness that Johnny noticed, his pupils dilating as he squeezed at your throat and laughed when that made you whimper and claw at his hand. He only kept on squeezing until you were starting to see stars.

“Dinnae fucking move princess.”

The pressure of his hands was gone in an instant and the flood of oxygen made you dizzy. There was no time for you to recover before he was on his knees in the dirt, treating your pussy like it was a mouth and sloppily kissing it over your panties. The press of his tongue was insistent and overwhelming, like he was trying to bully it past the fabric. When he ripped at your waistband with his teeth the lace tore. 

He continued his attack like he truly was a wolf sinking his teeth into a fresh meal, completely ruining your underwear until the mangled scraps fell to the floor and left you bare. Your hands were woven into his mohawk and you tried to pull him away, earning a growl that reverberated into your bones and a heavy handed smack to your ass before he assaulted your clit with tongue and teeth and spit. 

You felt yourself clench so hard that you almost felt nauseous. Fuck. You were trying to keep some sense of self, trying to remember that you were out in public and he was some feral version of the man you loved who was saying horrible things to you and promising he was going to hurt you. But there was a creeping haze taking over, turning you dumb for him. 

It wasn’t even something you had been aware was happening when you came on his tongue. It was just sensation, just the desperate need for more. The primal desperation to be fuller even as he pushed his tongue into your over sensitive hole while your walls fluttered through the pleasure of that high.  

“Please, need you.”

“Aye, that right? Needy wee slut.”

You were too far gone to notice that while he was rough in getting you onto your back in the dirt, one hand was gentle in cradling your head to make sure it landed softly. 

“Use those pretty wee words. Ask me for it the way ye’d ask a good English man.”

Ask me for it the way ye’d ask Simon.

When all you could do was wriggle underneath him and whine he grabbed the neckline of your dress and yanked it down to let your breasts spill out, slapping hard at one and making you howl. 

“They naw teach ye how tae talk proper ye wee slut? Ask fucking nicely.”

“Please, please I want you inside me.”

“Aye, can tell that princess. Whit else?”

“Want you to cum inside me.”

“Good fucking girl, wisnae so hard now was it?”

He didn’t take any of his clothes off, just fished his hard cock from his jeans, hooked your knees on his shoulders and pressed into your wet heat in one fluid motion. You both groaned as he bottomed out. It had been so long, you were so fucking tight around him. 

“M’so full, thank you thank you ,m’yours, need you. Fuck, ah. Made for you, it’s so much” you rambled, incoherent in your bliss. 

“There she is, needed this naw? Needed my cock deep in this tight wee English cunt. Cannae be a person without it, it’s whit ye were made for. Fucking built tae be on yer back with yer legs open for me.”

He stayed like that for what felt like forever, the fullness pushing any coherent thought out of your head. Fuck he was so deep like this, with you nearly folded in half. It felt like you were choking on his dick. You were clawing at the dirt by your sides so hard that you thought your fingers might bleed, but he grabbed your wrists and pinned them above your head before they could.

You were so cock drunk that you were only distantly aware of the look in his eyes now, the almost obsessive adoration as he took in how you looked pressed into the earth like this, dress rucked up from the bottom and pulled down from the top, palm print visible from where he had slapped at you, knees by your ears, hands pinned over your head and yet despite it all so blissed out you were salivating and babbling at him how you needed him.

When he pulled all the way out to the tip and then slammed back home you choked on the wind being knocked right out of you. It only encouraged him as he started to fuck you hard and deep, taking him time to make sure every thrust settled him so incredibly deep inside of you that you were floating. 

“Braw wee creature aren’t ye? Feart of me and gagin’ fer it anyway. Dinnae fash bonnie, gettin’ yer hole proper.”

You knew vaguely that he was close because you could hardly understand what he was saying. You were so unable to do anything in this position, no leverage on your arms and legs that you could use to pull him closer. 

“Inside, need it inside. Please, please ah!” you cried, no shame left in so as you begged like a bitch in heat for him to cum inside you. 

He shifted and sped his pace, nailing that spongy spot inside you that was making your vision black out with every thrust. You’d have marks on you from the buttons and zipper of his jeans. You’d have marks on your throat and your wrists, on your tits. He needed more, he needed anyone to take one look at you and know who you belonged to.

“‘at’s it, take it. Fuck. Good lass” he groaned as he sunk his teeth into your throat and your eyes rolled into the back of your head as you came, clamping down on his cock.

He jackhammered into you, forcing his way in while your pussy tried to force him out. The tight heat of it was too much and he growled and stilled after one more brutal thrust had him cumming deep inside you. He collapsed on top of you, the painful stretch from being folded as you were a delicious burn with the extra pressure forcing you to stretch further. 

You stayed like that for a while, both panting. Only when you were slowly coming back to your senses did you feel a sharp pain in your back from what must have been a particularly jagged stone. Ah, you thought you were probably bleeding on it, feeling something sticky. 

“Bannockburn” you breathed out softly.

The pressure was off of you almost immediately and he let go of your wrists and kneeled up, pulling out with a soft sigh leaving both of you at the feeling. He was quick to tuck himself in before his hands were back on you, gentle this time, fixing your dress and rubbing at all the spots he had marked.

“C’mere bonnie, ye did so well. Hurting anywhere I need tae look at?”

He looked at your back when you told him, laying soft kisses of apology on you as he cleaned it up. You used to tease Johnny for the little first aid kit he always had strapped to the back of his jeans whenever you went out, but it was coming in incredibly handy. Your panties were toast and he sheepishly tucked the remnants of them into his pocket before getting you to unsteady feet. 

“Creeping Jesus, I’ve made a right mess out of ye” he said with a bashful sort of grin, doing his best to try and fix your hair. 

“Hmm, s’ok” you replied, still a little hazy. 

He kissed you soundly and then gave you an absolute squeeze of a cuddle before scooping you into his arms in a princess carry.

“Let’s get ye all tucked up in the car then we can have a bath and dinner when we’re home eh?”

You nodded and nuzzled into his chest to get comfortable. He would take care of you, he always did.

–

John MacTavish didn’t know how he got so lucky. Not any woman would be softly dozing off in his arms after what he had just put you through. Fuck you were beautiful all of the time, but when you were like this? Fucked out and marked up but achingly soft for him in the afterglow? Jesus, he loved you. He would love you forever, through lifetimes. 

He’d explain obviously, he should really have warned you how hard he was going to go, that should have been pre-negotiated. But he had been so wound up. Fucking Simon Riley and his little comments about you, winding him up by putting thoughts in his head about how demure an English man could get you. It should have just made him laugh and shove at him, instead it made his blood boil and his cock hard and he had taken it out on you. You had let him, you always did until either of you thought it wasn’t safe. 

He paused on his way out of the woods with you, considering waking you so you could see the little glade he had come upon. It was pretty as anything, almost felt like hallowed ground with a giant stone right in the middle. Something about it called to an ancient longing within him. Fuck. He wanted to marry you out here. Was that ridiculous? Maybe just post orgasm stupidity.

Still as he settled you in the car and took you home so he could love you properly, he thought maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad idea.

–

“Fuck, Johnny.”

Simon Riley was an Englishman through and through. Everytime he stepped into battle it was to strike down those who would oppose his King and country. Yet he had left the battlefield. He had tracked into the woods, to where he knew MacTavish had crawled off to die. He found him leant against the stone that sat in the centre of a glade. Of course this is where he would want to die. Not on the battlefield, but here. The place he had married you. The place they both had.  

“Ye come tae watch it for yerself Si?” Johnny said with a laugh that turned to a hacking cough. 

“Course. Been trying to kill you for years, not about to miss it.”

Simon sat next to him, both of them looking at the sunlight filtering through the trees. It was peaceful here. Maybe in another lifetime they would not have been enemies. Maybe in another lifetime they could have been brothers.

“Ye’ll look after her until I can find her again?”

“Always.”

[ratboyy-withtheexistentialdread]

Nevermore Chapter 97

Spoilers ahead, lads. Skedaddle if you don't fast pass. EDIT I guess I’ve said too much in this post and need to pull it back a little. So imma gonna edit it so it doesn’t say too much about this chapter.

Alright, first my reaction cause HOLY HELL those last few panels really got me like

I really had to put my phone down and talk myself through them. Now, lets talk about what I gained from this chapter and the infamous Annabel Lee. I've noticed, at least in the comment section, the fandom really doesn't care for Annabel's character and its difficult to know where the animosity has come from. Tumblr obviously loves her but us heathens support women's rights and wrongs (Don't we gents?) Many call her a sociopath or what’s happens in the last few panels. Annabel is indeed ruthless, calculating and stone cold but she obviously cares. She cares for Lenore above everything. It can be easy to see this as obsession as we really haven't seen her care about much else or even herself. But one comment on the Webtoon brought up a very valid point which I've also picked up on.

Annabel and Lenore in life were very isolated and broken people when they met one another. Annabel, broken and then rebuilt into a prim and proper lady. Lenore, broken physically and mentally and closed off from the world.

Meeting each other saved them. They were no longer alone. There was an understanding between them at least that we know of.

Their differences though is what divides them in death.

Annabel played games, and masked her true self around her father and family connections. She now makes games of situations to retain what little control she had in life over a society she knew she could never break the rules of. A Game that was always rigged against her.

Lenore rebelled against society. She fled the estate to escape a suitor, was bound to the attic and ostracized by her family, she then faked her death and posed as man to court Annabel, the one person who cared for her.

Lenore wants to break the rules of the deans Death Game. Annabel wants to follow them.

It’s all they’ve ever known.

Before it was only them that mattered. Now Lenore has so much more to fight for and Annabel still only has Lenore. Both are right in their own way of playing the game but it pains the other to witness.

Annabel, I’m sure is aware that the Deans are not all they seem to be and won’t simply allow the students to turn the tables on them if they played how Lenore wants to.

And playing Annabel’s way means the callous death of many many people that do deserve another chance at life.

Now. I do have to agree with Annabel in the sense that Lenore forgets

This is a Death Game

Right now the “villainous” characters show their true face with pride and the “hero’s” are charming and true but as we get down to the wire, it’s going to get grey. There are no good or bad at the end of these games, only survival.

Could Annabel show some restraint and more tact when speaking strategy and making plans with Lenore? Absolutely. She’s little too giddy about sweeping some pieces off the board.

Lenore also needs to stop being so naive. She saw first hand what exactly the Deans are capable of in Dreamland, it put the fear of god in her.

In fairness to both characters though they and we are still missing big pieces of what happened between them and what their causes of death were. Which could hold big aspects of their characterization.

Maybe Lenore was originally very callous about others. In life, aside from Theo and Annabel, we’ve never really seen her interact with others. Perhaps this is the Lenore Annabel speaks of.

Anyway, I’m rambling. In conclusion, I’m a bit disappointed in Nevermores comment section. I enjoy Annabel’s character although some parts do worry me a bit but I have hope Red and Flynn have plans to curve this to a satisfying reason and conclusion.

That cliffhanger, boy howdy, what the fuck is Lenore gonna do…

[don1t1red]

Honestly, one thing about DotO which always bothered me is how Billie seems to be so lonely in her journey. And not in a way of "she is a lone-wolf" but in a literal sense of loneliness and not-belonging. It almost feels like it is her first day in Karnaca, a city where she doesn't know a single thing or person. Which isn't true. I know that a lot of people have already talked about this, and so I won't jump into the depth of criticism. Treat this post as a bunch of thoughts which occurred to me in my first playthrough.

Firstly, there is no recognition from different people. Stilton, for example. In DH2 she was ready to battle her way to his house and help him, she payed with her blood, her eye and her arm. And yet in DotO we don't see any valuable mentions of this man. Yes, we have a photo in her cabin but that's it! Nothing more nothing less, just a photo which exists in the cabin only to show us, the player, the Void rifts. Almost like it was never meant to actually represent their relationship, just a funny mechanic of the game.

Maybe I don't understand her character to that extent but when I firstly played and heard Billie's monologue about the state of the Dreadful Whale, I had a thought. Was there no one who could help her with that? And my first thought was Stilton, especially after I saw their photo together. But alas she didn't mention anything like that which was completely fine… till the The Stolen Archive mission. With a plot progression things became absurdly stupid. Billie learns that the cult uses Shindaerey as their hideout. And what is Shindaerey? It's a literal mining quarry.

And so you want to tell me that Billie who I know, cunning Billie, who was, by Daud's words, extremely good at unsolving mysteries, won't at least ask Stilton about this quarry? She won't ask a mining baron of Karnaca? Really? Give her skills some credit! I'm not asking for a 5 minute long cutscene but at least a small panel in the pre-mission briefing where Billie talks to him about that, and where we can see how worried he is for her. She is not alone and, no matter what, there is still at least one person who remembers her, sees her and wants the best for her. But again, for whatever reason Billie has no valuable connections in this game, it seems. So it didn't happen.

Two other people about which I keep thinking about are Thomas and that person who borrowed Billie's skiff and returned it during the Follow the Ink mission.

If that note from a certain T. was actually from Thomas I can't think of good enough reasons not to include some of the letter which might happen in between them during the events of the game. Thomas knew that both Billie and Daud were in Karnaca but he didn't know that Daud had died. And honestly an unfinished letter from Billie to him where she tries her best to write about their master's death but just can't - would be absolutely gut-wrenching and insightful. Also it could be interesting to see the difference in how Billie is talking about this event and how she is living through it in reality. Because - obviously - people's internal and external dialogues would be different and seeing that difference in Billie would help us, the player, to understand some shapes of her character.

Or maybe Thomas would learn about Daud's death himself somehow, maybe he could recognize Billie's work as she goes though the city to uncover its secrets. And, finally, it would be simply fun to find a small lootstach from Thomas on one of the missions, accompanied with a letter from him. How is he now? What are his thoughts about Billie? How do her actions are seen by the common folk? Or by the gangs? After all, a good character is not only divided by how the story sees that character but also how this character sees themselves and what other people in the story are thinking about this character. And, as I already said, this small letter exchange between Billie and Thomas could cover up those aspects.

And so we are left with only one character whose presence and absence in Billie's story bothers me. That person who borrowed the skiff. Because the skiff was Billie's main link between the shore and the Dreadful Whale. We learnt from DH2 that in any port there would be a “fee” for leaving the ship there, later, in DotO she complains that hiding her ship wasn't an easy task. So whoever borrowed it must be a good friend of Billie, as absence of the skiff puts her in a bad and potentially dangerous situation. Besides there is a note by a certain M., which talks about meeting with Billie later. I was kinda excited to see who this person might be. Someone whom I already know? Character from the first game? Maybe from the second one? Would it be a howler or black market dealer? Would they give me some special mission akin to one that Emily can get in the Royal Conservatory mission? Well, should I say that I was left wondering as there was not a single special NPC which met the criteria.

What? I forgot about someone? Deirdre? Oh, right. Deirdre. The best person in Billie's life and the worst death in Billie's memory. Right. It's almost too easy to forget that she exists, as Billie talks about her approximately two times in the game? More or less so. Should she talk more about her? Maybe, I don't know. But I remember thinking about using the rat charm in the Void or in the quarry. I thought that in the Void I could hear the real Deirdre speaking, this idea gave me chills back then. To adjust to the voice of your loved one's from rats, only to hear her cursing you for all you have done or to call you from beyond. I thought that she would appear somewhere in the Void, just in the corner of my vision. But again it didn't happen. And I don't know for better or for worse. As in the current state if you want to completely strip her out from the game - you won't lose a single thing. After all, a rat charm is just a rat charm, and so is a voice in it, as it never changes and never really speaks to Billie, it was never a personal matter.

Overall, I don't want to be another person who throws rocks at DotO as, honestly, I like Billie and I'm just… sad, I guess. I'm sad that the game about such a character fails to make me think more of her. I'm sad that the plot of this game was kinda ruined with a terrible script. And, at the end of the day, I'm just sad that Billies didn't get her chance to shine in her own game.

But nonetheless I still like Billie and, at least, her sarcastic comments on the surrounding was always a delight to hear, so I'm gonna replay this game one more time in vain hopes to find what I see in it.

[nalyra-dreaming]

I know people have a lot of different theories about this, and my apologies if you've already shared your own but do you think it was really Armand that got Louis out of the wall after the trail? Louis said he recognized Armand's blood in the rocks, but Louis has also been wrong about the way a lot of things happened. When he asks if Armand saved him at the trail and Armand says yes, I hear more hesitation there while he is bald face LYING than in his next yes to Louis' question about if he freed him, which makes me think it might be at least some what true? And if it is why save Louis when he'd just tried to have him killed? Maybe some kind of parallel of him counting on Louis to destroy the coven the way he'd manipulated Lestat into doing the same before?

The main thing that bugs me is that obviously Armand's whole "Woe is me I was being punished by the coven for saving Louis" schtick is bullshit, so how much of the following part of that story about how his "reduced status" allowed him to sneak Louis out of the wall is true? There's also the fact that Lestat was still in Paris, and I cannot imagine a reality where Lestat knows Louis is being starved to death in a wall and doesn't try to save him. Like. If he had any control in the matter, he wouldn't let that happen, period. There is of course that we know for sure now (thanks Sam lmao) that Lestat was coerced/controlled into being at the trail in the first place, so he very well could have been in some kind a captive state himself, in addition to probably also being grief mad over Claudia, while Louis was trapped in the coffin that would have stopped him from doing anything about or knowing it was happening in the first place.

I am so excited for s3 I am going to gnaw off my own arm! Anyway, would love your thoughts, thanks!

Okay, so up until yesterday I would have said: well it must have been Armand, Lestat was chained up in the tower after the trial.

However, the writer's room just posted this:

And look, there's a "Lestat's coffin"... that we see Armand close when he tells of how he has been "demoted".

Now, I always thought that Lestat would be there, I mean we see him sitting there, but I thought that he might be in one of the tombs maybe, but no, they put him in a coffin.

And when he didn't behave like he should at the trial they punished him, and Armand went and took his coffin, which is a very Armand thing to do, I can tell you, lmao. (Arguably he is seen doing that in his narration of events, too.) (EDIT: @lightleckrereins pointed out it likely wasn't Lestat's coffin after all, so I'll stay with 'Armand so would' *g*)

Anyways, back to your question:

The show established that maker and fledgling can feel each other through the cord.

There is no way - no way! - that Lestat would have stayed calm and silent while he would have felt Louis starve to death (as you also point out). NONE.

Which makes me think that maybe he made some kind of deal with Armand (and this is one of the approaches I am using in my fic, just for the record), to get Louis out.

Now. The thing is.

There IS a possibility that Armand got Louis out, dragged the box through the sewers to a certain point, got Lestat, took him also through the sewers, to revive Louis.

But I think that is unlikely, as much as I would love it to be true. Because I don't think there's a way in HELL that Lestat would have left Louis then.

And Louis wasn't dead or deaf, he would have noticed Lestat and Armand there.

I think it is far more likely that Armand freed Louis, and then left him, as part of ... whatever deal.

There is also the third possibility, that Armand and Lestat took Louis out of the wall, Lestat revived Louis, and then Armand dragged Lestat away (who was clearly not at the top of his powers as seen and stated by Sam).

But I think the coven dynamics after the trial would argue against that, as well as the aforementioned fact that Lestat would have wanted to stay, and even then, even in his weakened state he would have fought.

EXCEPT maybe... that part of the tale is true, namely that Armand waited for Santiago to be distracted to make his/their move. But again, there, still, does someone not being there when Louis wakes up come in. Which weighs heavily, imho.

All in all - I think it is a possibility that it was Lestat who got Louis out, yes. A high possibility if you factor a deal in.

The blood? Possibility as well, but not likely, for practicality reasons. Except, of course, the whole aftermath went vastly different, which is another possibility.

We do know Lestat's skin looked weirdly like still healing from burns in the reunion scene after all....

So maybe he did, and was still there when Louis burned the theater.

That, too, is a possibility.

Until we get more posts or clues it will be impossible to tell, tbh. :)

And yes, I am soooooo excited for s3, I can't even :)))))) And the tease in OnlyFangs with the quote between Lestat and Gabrielle!!!!!!!!!

[troius]

What we learned from the war

"Endings are hard" is a something of a truism, but it's borne out in Bleach, where every story arc besides after the first two stumbled at the finish (even the endings of the first two arcs don't really "end" so much as continue into a new story). In the Arrancar arc, the number of characters and plotlines got so overwhelming that an ending that had to be rushed if it was to arrive at all. In the Lost Agent arc, the characters were pared down, but the ending wound up thematically inconsistent with the story anyways, possibly due to real-life circumstances. And the Thousand-Year Blood War somehow managed to have both problems.

The change in direction from "tightly focused character drama" to "sprawling cast of soldiers" meant that it was unlikely to ever give us the development of our protagonist that we craved, and that lack of focus was only aggravated by the widely-reported health problems of the author. And yet, perhaps because we don't get that, because so little of this arc is filtered through Ichigo learning about himself, we get a much clearer statement of the values inherent in the work.

This is most evident in our antagonists for this Arc. Yhwach and the Wandenreich don't really have the relationship with Ichigo that previoius antagonists had. He never knew his Quincy heritage, never identified with their ideals, and so feels very little conflict about opposing them. He doesn't ever develop his Quincy powers, at least beyond integrating them with his already existing powerset. And he doesn't take much of a personal interest in Yhwach, who in turn, doesn't seem to think much of him when he's not directly in front of him.

But for all that Ichigo doesn't end up having much of a dynamic with them, the Wandenreich still manages to maintain a unique character. Every antagonist has a priority, something that they are willing to do great evil for. For Soul Society, it's its own existence, the continuation of the system they've built. For Aizen, it's his own self-aggrandizement. For the Fullbringers, it was simply living another day, screwing over others so that they can't screw you first. But the Wandenreich has no such priority. They simply want it all to end.

That's most obvious in Yhwach's ending monologue, but you can see it from the very beginning as he kills Yamamoto, the man who tried to move on from his bloody past being slaughtered by the man who would absolutely not let it go. Yhwach shows more emotion towards the skeletons of Argola and Huberdt, his dead soldiers from a war long lost, than he does towards any of his living subordinates. And his subordinates follow his lead in showing no love to one another, happily stabbing each other in the back without even the Arrancars' uneasy level of camaraderie. Their movement has no future, and neither do they, so nihilism is the only recourse.

Most of the time. I think it's important to note that every time a member of the Wandenreich expresses positive feelings towards one of their comrades, it's immediately followed by them turning on Yhwach. Liltotto, Bazz, Giselle, eventually, in her own twisted way…even Jugram, at the very end. Sure, Yhwach kills them for their impertinence (he is the bad guy), but he also massacres the Wandenreich faithful en masse. There's no salvation, only death, and he'll enforce that state on his followers rather than allow them to discover any alternative.

I imagine the lesson, and the general attitude of the Wandenreich, was not lost on Uryu Ishida. Even in his relative paucity of appearances, it's he who is at the moral center of the arc. His culture, which he had thought was nearly entirely dead, turns out to be alive, and out for vengeance against the people who exterminated them. It's something he probably fantasized about growing up, and I don't blame him for joining. How could he not?

But at the end, he makes the very easy choice. Calling it a matter of "life and death" is a little on the nose, but it's morally quite black and white. Yhwach has no hope for this world, or for his people within it, or even himself. He lost a war for the nature of existence to a monster a thousand years ago, and never got over it. But Uryu has the strength to look at the horrors of this world and yet hope for better. Because he has people he loves in life, and who love him in return, he can dream of a better tomorrow.

And that's what the ending is all about. Yhwach loses to Ichigo, and it is very much "good guy beats bad guy". But he also loses to Uryu, and to "I hope to have a family with my girlfriend who I love so much" Renji Abarai, and to "I have a tremendous amount of hope to eventually make myself king of everything" Sosuke Aizen, and eventually (in a way I'm still confused about mechanically) to the child Ichigo and Orihime will eventually have, the literal embodiment of the potential of the future.

The final villain of Bleach is not society's tendency to preserve itself at any human cost. It's not individual selfishness, or manipulativeness, or any of the many vices we saw embodied in the hollows throughout the series. It's despair, the idea that life might not be worth living even through all the struggles and horrors our protagonists have endured. Sure, it will always raise its head, sometimes at the most inconvenient, or ill-fitting times. But having its reincarnation be blown away by the supernaturally normal lives of our cast…well, that's as clear of a message as I can imagine.

[xxhypersomnia]

My Gladiator II Review

Before I get into my individual analysis I would like to say a few things. Please keep these points in mind: 

Reviews are not a substitute for your own personal feelings or ideas about a movie. A review should never determine how a movie made you feel. Movies are art and we each experience them differently. That is the whole point. 

Step outside the fandom. The majority of people watching this movie are not deep within the bowels of the fandoms of the many amazing cast members in this movie. They do not know every leaked detail, they have not done research on their character’s real life history, they have not soaked in every subtle detail. They like Ridley or Gladiator, and they sat in a seat when it came out. Our expectations are often higher or at least different than the general public. Ridley also has a duty to make sure his stories are understood by the general public. So even though we may have wanted more, I doubt most people would want to sit through an 8 hour movie. Also take into account the general thought process of a movie. How people feel about things is based on their own personal experiences and qualifiers, as well as their attention spans, relation to art or history, etc. People go with their gut more than anything. 

Movies are art. They are not required to follow your personal beliefs, they do not need/nor can they satisfy every viewer. The creators of movies are allowed artistic integrity.

Subtlety & Brainpower 

One of the things that Ridley does well in all his movies, but also this one, is subtlety. There does not always need to be a lot of dialog to get a thought or feeling across. The visuals are their own character and that is the mark of a great director in my opinion. Things like the way a character looks at someone, or the proximity in which they stand can say a million things. Many of these moments can be seen in the eyes of Macrinus, Acacius, Lucuis, Lucilla, etc. They all have moments like this. A good actor can convey the feelings without having to say a word, and I think that all of them did a marvelous job in showing their talents in this arena. Some key moments being Macrinus and the way he notices the connection between Lucilla and Lucius, you can see the wheels turning in his mind, the way he needs to get ahead of this, to preserve himself and his rise to power. The way he needs to formulate a plan to still keep Lucius under his thumb because he knows he could ruin his whole plan if he brings back the connection with his mother. This is done in a matter of seconds with just a simple look on his face. 

Another great example is the connection between Acacius and Lucilla. They don’t really say a lot to each other throughout the movie, but you can feel that connection between them by their body language, the way Acacius looks at her like she means everything to him, because she does. Another is when the arrow comes into the emperor’s stand. At this moment Acacius actually looks like he fears it was for Lucilla, thinking Lucius is aiming for her, when in reality it's him. This is a magnificent moment. The look on Acaius’ face when that eye contact happens with Lucius is intense. A feeling of “how dare you? Why would you aim here?” And trying to figure him out, that is just perfection. 

Now, I will also say that recognizing things like this are also on the viewer. I cannot expect everyone to be a good reader of body language, or empathic enough to pick up on the emotions the actors portray. Which really is unfortunate for anyone who watches and doesn’t see things this closely, but I cannot make them have those abilities, unless they work on actively looking for these sorts of things. 

Lucuis’ Anger 

Beautifully expressed: rage from pain trope. Especially the scene where he fights against the chimps. Our pain is primal. Seeing his friend die just added fuel to the flame after his wife’s death which is still incredibly recent. It wasn’t survival anymore, it was a way to avenge those he cared about. His rage toward Rome began at a young age, when it took Maximus and his mother from him. It took his home from him. Then it got worse as he just continued to lose those he loved. (If you are a TLOU fan, you will also notice this character trope in Ellie which is incredibly, incredibly executed as I am sure you know.) 

The death of Acacius added to this rage, as well as the death of his mother which directly led him to finally bring down Macrinus. Lucius reached his breaking point, this is enough bloodshed, enough pain. He is thinking, this is not a responsibility that I asked to take on, but I cannot sit idly by and let Rome continue its tyranny on the innocent (a strong quality he got from his father). While we’re at it, let's talk about how Lucius is not Maximus. I think this was also expertly crafted, and when people say the second was a remake of the first, this is the biggest thing that stands out to me. Maximus was angry at Rome I am sure, he also experienced loss and heartache, but he was a trained military man. He fought with a type of calm and calculation that Lucius does not have. Lucius fought for his people, but he was not spending his life expertly learning to control his emotions like a general must. I loved this distinction, it is clear in so many parts of the film. 

The way that Lucius is incredibly stubborn, or the way that he delivers speeches to support the men is much different than Maximus, and I believe that is with purpose. One thing rang true between them both, which was like a string connecting Lucius to Maximus, is that it doesn’t matter your experience or expertise, you show the people that you care and that you will lead them with caring and humility and you will earn their trust. Maximus and Lucius did not just care about their own survival, they cared about the survival of everyone who was forced to be a gladiator. They cared about working together, which is something Lucius definitely learned from watching his father in the arena. He knew that things were better accomplished as a team. This was also the way Rome needed to function, and that is what was going to make them good leaders. By taking into account the suffering of others. In the end, Lucius may not know the first thing about politics or running a council for the people, but he understood the people. 

They also both were good leaders in the sense that they were unafraid to take the helm. They knew someone had to help, so they took the duty upon themselves. 

Macrinus & Lucius have the same motive 

Denzel’s character and Paul’s character both hate rome. They both want to see it change/fall. However, while Lucius’ reasons are based on avenging the loved ones he lost, Macrinus’ reasons are selfish. He remembers the pain that was directly caused to him and he wants revenge. He wants to make Rome pay, he wants to burn it to the ground. But the way he was going about it was making him no better than those who mistreated him in the first place. He was too consumed by power, literally saying “I must have power” and he was willing to do anything to obtain it, regardless of who he hurt. 

(This shows the clear difference between revenge and avenging) 

The Emperors

In reality this was much too short a time to understand a lot about their characters, but the point got across. These two characters deserved much more screen time but sadly that wasn’t available. They could have each had their own movies to be honest, but I think that Ridley did enough with the scenery, the supplements around them to create a narrative that could still be understood. We knew that Fred’s character had syphilis. We knew they both were losing their minds, they were twins. They were easily manipulated and never should have been in power in the first place. They were easy targets for Macrinus to come in and manipulate them. I immediately loved both of them and believed their mental states. Without having to be told specifically they were unstable, we could see it immediately, through their appearances, the look in their eyes, their laughter, their inability to discuss things at a level of intelligence needed to run Rome. Joe especially was deep into the mental state of his character and he did so beautifully. 

The Use of Lighting & Color

There are multiple moments in the movie where lighting is expertly used as a tool for storytelling. A lot of the lighting I noticed around Lucilla especially. There is a moment where she is in one of the cells I believe and she is lit so beautifully by the window (I tried to find a photo, but have not). This can represent how she was light, a sign of hope, of safety. 

Color is huge in film. Colors can convey emotions that you don’t even recognize they are making you feel sometimes. A huge example of the importance of color was the end scene where Lucius says goodbye to Maximus and Lucilla. The scene is mostly blue and purple. Colors that are often said to be calming. Blue is related to grief and death. What I find beautiful about this is that most of the movie is in natural tones. Beige, brown, white. Then there’s this one scene that is so blue, as gentle as it is, it's a stark contrast to the feeling of the rest of the film. 

I also enjoyed the scenes where Lucius drifted to another “realm/dream” and envisioned his wife. I think purely from an artistic standpoint this was beautiful to do in black and white. Death and the shock of death can feel hollow, colorless, like every ounce of vibrancy has been sucked out of your world. There could have also been a cultural representation here, forgive me I am not versed enough to know about the way people in these areas viewed death besides they thought they lived outside the realm of the living, which could potentially be represented by the taking away of his wife or how he ran but couldn’t get to her. (I would need more research into this subject to know more. Although I have a lot of great books about death and how different cultures view death if you would like to expand yourself.) 

General Acacius 

To put it bluntly, Acacius needed to die. Again, beautifully executed. Putting aside my massive fangirling of Pedro Pascal, he was a flushed out character with the little that we got of him. With very little language, they were able to build him as a character that we knew had a good heart. From the beginning we see him grieve the loss of human life, regardless of his role as general. Acacius was no doubt seen as merciful, but also most likely as a pillar of the growth of Rome. The expansions that, by view of the people, kept them alive and thriving. Continued to give them lands to harvest and feed the people. Obviously we learn more about his character later from the full script, which helps explain a lot of other stuff I won’t get into right now. But Acacius did a great job as a much needed story support. Acacius was fiercely loyal to Lucilla. Not only as her love and husband, but as someone who was tasked with caring for her (which is lightly touched on in the first scene of Acacius and the emperors together). This is absolutely beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time. From the original movie, we know that Lucilla was the subject of much pain and heartache, being misused by her brother and discarded, as well as losing her son and Maximus. It was so lovely to know that she had spent the last 16 years, no matter how strenuous, with a man who would give her the world. She deserved that. (all women deserve that ahem). 

Why did Acacius HAVE to die in the manner he did? 

Let’s start with how this character was perceived. Much like Maximus, we get the sense that Acacius was much loved, selfless in his fights for Rome and understanding. He commanded gently and caringly. When Acacius was captured for treason, Macrinus saw this as a “two birds with one stone” opportunity. He could buy the loyalty of Lucius, by giving him the general’s head, but he also could use this moment as a way to manipulate the emperors and begin to turn the people against them. He makes the suggestion of having Acacius enter the ring. Which is not what the people would have wanted. They did not want to watch their beloved General die in spectacle. Executions were often reserved for non-citizens of Rome as well, he was being degraded by being put in the ring at all. Lucius line about how they treat their heroes was perfect here. Lucius, refusing to kill Acacius, set him up for future success as the prince of Rome. The people were able to see that he was also merciful. If he had killed Acacius himself, they would have hated him for taking away their beloved general. 

When Lucius realizes that Acacius cared for his mother and his father, as well as refusing to fight him, he is able to see past his anger and realize he was not an enemy. Acacius being killed so abruptly, and by arrows again, reignited his rage for Rome. Recognizing that Acacius, a good man, was also being forced into a form of servitude, unable to deny his post as general. And thus forced to continue taking lives in the name of Rome. In this moment, there is realization, for himself but also the people of Rome, that Rome is not there to help. There is no discerning between enemy and hero in the eyes of Rome. Acacius’ death serves as the catalyst for the people to begin to turn against the idea of the emperors and open the space for Lucius to become the one people look to. 

The symbolism of arrows/death by arrow 

Everyone that Lucius loved died by arrow. Arrows are a disconnected way to kill someone, it's less personal. It's distant and emotionless. Using arrows was incredibly symbolic. Those in power are cowards, unable to take the lives of the people directly. Pedro’s character however, has had to do this multiple times. A close, personal kill resonates with you. You see the pain, you feel it, you get covered in their blood. Arrows are a cowards’ tool (or any long distance weapon) where you can disconnect the life you’re taking from yourself. This just showed that Rome didn’t care, killing was easy to do and they would do it to anyone, there was no grief in their actions.

It felt like theatre 

The directing style of Ridley leans hard into this being an aspect of the film. We know that he enjoys single cuts and doing things from start to finish and that was really shown here. I recommend watching the movie again and just making yourself aware of this. There were multiple scenes that made it feel like you were watching a play, from the placement of the characters to the way they had to act in the moment. A phenomenal example of this is the scene where Macrinus manipulates Caracalla. The monkey, Sherry, was definitely doing her best to throw them off their game and they acted their asses off. Bravo! But also, the set up of the scene felt very theatre-like which resonated with me. Who knows, maybe that’s because I’m a theatre kid. 

Shock Factor 

There were a few moments that actually made the audience gasp, which to me is just great. Movies with a strong emphasis on fighting and death can easily be turned into just a gore fest but I do not feel that happened here. The parts that made you tense were done well and were few, such as Macrinus’ hand being chopped off, and Geta’s death at the hands of his “brother” (technically Macrinus). 

Homage to the original

While some people think this was a cheap way to do the movie, I don’t. I think it was marvelously executed and nostalgic. What is cheap is things like Disney literally making the same movie but just making it live action. This was a way to bring your memory back to the original, to spark the feelings you originally felt, or to get excited over what might happen when you realized that things were similar. Personally, I rewatched the original right before going to London to watch the sequel and I was so glad that I did. I was able to pinpoint those exact moments and it made me wonder where the story was going to go. Were they going to do the same thing? Then I was pleasantly surprised when it was different. I think Gladiator reserved the right to do this. It has been 24 years since the original, it was a big deal when it came out, a fan favorite and the reason being, it was a good story. So to implement those same story elements into this one and not only bring back memories, but create memories for a new audience, I think in my own opinion was appropriate. 

There were some beautiful, almost shot for shot moments, like when Lucius’ friend rides to find the military to enlist their help or after being captured in the original, Maximus’ injury was helped by a fellow slave and Lucius did the same for another in the sequel. 

Cons

Too many storylines to flesh out 

One of the great things about this movie is we got a lot of really great characters, when in the original we had about 3 main characters (Maximus, Lucilla and Commodus). In the new one we have 6 (Acacius, Lucilla, Lucius, Geta and Caracalla). They are characters that we want to imagine more of, that we need more of. The issue is there wasn’t enough time to give them all the storylines they deserve. While some of us may have gladly sat through an 8 hour movie, I don’t think that is the case for most people. However, I did not leave the movie theatre feeling I didn’t understand any of the characters. I maybe wanted more of them, but I was given enough to understand them and their place in the storyline. 

Do we need to talk about the sharks?

(maybe a little bit…) We know that the reason we don’t have great white sharks in tanks in aquariums right now is because of transportation. Great whites must have constant flowing water over their gills to live, this is why they are continuously swimming. There have been many cases of modern technology attempting to move them for human entertainment, which have failed miserably. So I am confused as to how they were transported into the arena (if they were. I have not done my research to see if this was at all historically linked.) If you would like to learn more about how we have made attempts to transport sharks, I recommend one of my favorite books “Devil’s Teeth” by Susan Casey. 

Recap

I know this wasn't much of a review as it was an analysis and that was by design. I do not wish to tell you whether or not you should like the movie, but to instead give you tools to look at the movie more objectively. I hope you liked this, and please feel free to message me here or on instagram. I have more to discuss but I can't possibly go on forever in this post.

[inbarfink]

One thing about ‘Fionna and Cake’ the Show’s view of trauma and recovery is that it loves to emphasize the idea that a step forwards is a step forwards no matter how flawed it is.

Simon’s decision to embark on the Crown Quest is definitely the most obvious example. It was a terrible move that speaks both to Simon’s inability to see value in his old life outside of noble self-sacrifice and a deep streak of basically-suicidal self-destructiveness. Fionna is only really starting to fathom just how truly a terrible bad no good idea it is, and Simon has yet to really admit it at all.

But compared to where he was just moment before he made that decision, literally resigned to drinking himself away and waiting for death at the hands of the Scarab even though that will also doom all of Fionnaworld - self destructing so hard he was taking an entire universe down with him - that was still technically a Step Forwards.

It got Simon to take Fionna and Cake’s feelings into consideration and actually engage with them as Real People and not just another example of the universe kicking him when he’s down

And it kept him motivated enough to keep moving forwards and really helped him rediscover his capacity to feel happiness 

And that’s how he and Fionna really made friends and developed a bond

And that is what saved Simon from the Magic Crown and his own self-destructiveness in ‘Jerry’, at least temporarily.

Him opening up to Fionna and allowing her to know him beyond just a Pathetic Old Weirdo Who Doesn't Even Have Magic Anymore is what allowed her to so quickly understand why letting Simon turn himself into Ice King is actually such a terrible thing.

And Fionna’s hesitation to give Simon the Crown and the chance she’s given to him to relive his happiest memories stopped - or at least delayed the most self-destructive part of Simon’s plan. 

And I feel it’s pretty probable Fionna’s words and actions and the friendship they forged and the positive experiences the adventure has given him will have an effect on Simon’s decisions in the future.

However toxic and flawed Simon’s first step was, it still mattered to his overall recovery.

And you can say similar things about Fionna’s progress as a hero.

Most notably her blunder with the Obvious Trap in “The Star”. 

Was it a Bad Terrible No Good Idea? Yes, absolutely. Both for Fionna’s psyche in specific and also for Literally Everyone in Vampireworld actually

But it was a Step Forward in the very very bumpy road of Fionna towards true heroism. Her earnest desire to truly help people and make the world around her just a little bit better and questioning authority - after blindly following the Winter King’s flattery in a quest to Defeat All the Baddies made her hurt so many people… 

It shows how much her experiences affected her and mattered to her how much she’s trying to learn from her mistakes. Taking responsibilities for her actions, dealing with the consequences. Even as the people around her are, however well-intentionally, trying to tell her to pay it no mind at all 

Fionna still understands that it is important to her to care about everything that happened and to try and do better. And she did really try to do better. 

And after that little blinder went up in flames, she started trying to do better by being more careful. And that also wasn't perfect because she became kinda overly-careful and overprotective and put a huge wedge between her and Cake

But it's still an important step in Fionna learning to process the consequences of her actions. And because Fionna is now so much more invested in thinking things through and not wanting anyone to get hurt - that is also a big reason why she hesitated to give Simon the Extinctworld Crown. And it's probably going to lead to other good deeds in the future.

And that… doesn’t negate All the Terrible Things that happened as a result of her decisions - but it still mattered as a step forwards for her character as well. 

[phantom-of-the-501st]

"I don't enjoy solitude" Pt 2

I'm gonna call this a part two because it follows on from the post I made yesterday. Although I guess it is less of a follow up and more of a case of reworking what I said in the original post into something a little bit more fleshed out, because I feel like I glossed over a lot of stuff I wanted to say initially (and didn't because it was almost midnight when I wrote it @saturn-sends-hugs don't yell at me for not sleeping I know 😭)

I'll probably just recap everything I said in the other post in this one anyway so it doesn't matter whether or not this is the only one you see I guess

Like I said yesterday, this line is interesting because while it initially puts forward the idea that Echo doesn't like being alone, the actual context had nothing to do with Echo being put in a situation where he would be by himself. In fact, Omega is asking him if he wanted to join her in something. And yes, Echo does hate being by himself, but the line is more about Echo being left alone with his own thoughts. It isn't just being by himself physically, its being stuck in his head without any escape. That's what terrifies him.

And it makes sense. Echo went through some atrocious things and a lot of his memories are either bad or have likely been tainted by other circumstances in a way that means that he doesn't want to think about them. Outside of that one scene of Echo in the cockpit following Tech's death, we never see Echo not doing something or not being with someone. There is always something that is keeping him from his thoughts and that's the whole point. The last thing that Echo wants to do is confront what is in his head. Being alone with nothing but his own mind is exactly what he went through on Skako Minor and the last thing he ever wants to do is revisit that.

But the thing is, it isn't healthy (at least, not in the long run) because for as long as Echo keeps running from his thoughts, he's going to wear himself down. This man never stops. He just keeps going and going and going and half the time if he isn't doing anything "practical", it's against his own will. And so much of that is linked to survivor's guilt. As many other people brought up, Echo likely blames himself for the clones who died as a result of the Techno Union getting a hold of the battle strategies. We know that it's not his fault but to Echo the fact that he survived that entire ordeal, while it was his own plans that were used and manipulated to kill his brothers, must eat away at him.

Echo has never really taken the time to mentally process a lot of what he went through. By the end of the show, he is in a much better place than he was initially: he's physically healthier and he's actually cracking jokes again. A lot of that is thanks to the Bad Batch. They were integral in his healing journey. However, that doesn't mean he's okay. This is a man who can't be left alone with his thoughts because it will cause him to spiral. Not constantly being around people or constantly doing something leads him into a dark place and that isn't a great position for him to be in. This man doesn't really know peace because every part of his life, even his mind, runs at 300 miles an hour. And Hunter knows this. He wasn't wrong when he asked Echo when it will ever be enough. He's watching his brother run himself ragged trying to rescue the clones and to fight against the Empire, when realistically, it's not a battle they can win. Every time Echo leaves Pabu, the Batch are faced with the idea that it may be the last time they ever see him. Because if we're being completely honest here, unless Echo ever gets to the point where he is okay enough to sit down and actually relax for once in his life, there will be a point when it will be the last time they ever see him. Whether or not it's in two days or two years or two decades, this man will lose his life to the cause, even if it's as a result of him working himself down to the bone.

Echo will never value his own life over the life of his brothers. He won't retire because to him it will never be fair that he can live a life of peace when there are others out there who can't have that, and that means he will only stop the fight when there is no-one left worth fighting for. But there will never be a point where there is no-one left to fight for. Echo will continue to find a reason to stay in the fight, to keep working, to never keep still because that's just who he is. And we love him for that. We love his loyalty and his dedication and his endless ambition. But it's also to his detriment. I don't know if we will ever see Echo at a point where he is truly okay. He will keep going until he can't anymore and if that is at the cost of his own life, then that's what he'll take.

[crimson-and-clover-1717]

I mentioned Maslow’s hierarchy of needs* in this post regarding Ed and the gravy basket. His needs are lower rung and basic. But Ed does demonstrate an intuitive understanding of self-actualisation and self-esteem which rests at the top of the pyramid.

The show is so careful not to suggest Ed is ‘cured’ by Stede. Stede isn’t mentioned by name at all in the gravy basket. He is alluded to as things get ugly later on and shown in flashback, is strongly linked to Ed’s reasons to live, and is probably there symbolically as Ruthie.

But when Ed is trying to think of a potential life outside of piracy, it involves self-fulfilling work regarding what is likely a long-term dream: the innkeeper. It’s taken other forms, such as Blackbeard’s bar and grill, but it’s something that Ed aspires to which is his dream before it becomes something he wants to share with Stede.

*I know Maslow isn’t the be all and end all. It’s familiar and useful.

In the gravy basket, Ed is focusing upon both the bottom and top of Maslow. It’s the middle of the pyramid, Love and Belonging, Ed tries to ignore for as long as he can until it breaks through his consciousness in the diatribe during the innkeeper skit, followed by his beach confession, ‘I don’t think anyone’s waiting for me.’

It’s important that Ed’s vision of Stede triggered by Stede’s presence, mirrors Ed and gives him space; the vision seems to say, I’m here for you to share a life with, not to be your life. You are safe to be yourself with me. Part of that ‘self’ is the innkeeper dream, and Ed thinks he can actualise that dream with Stede. Both are part of what a happy life looks like for Ed. It’s a surprisingly healthy iteration of what love should be - freeing.

Outside of the gravy basket, Ed doesn’t let go of the need for self-actualisation and self-esteem. He reasserts in 206 that Stede and he are innkeepers even though they aren’t at this stage. It’s as if he’s trying desperately to manifest it, whilst also reinforcing to Stede how important this dream is to him.

In 207, perhaps thinking the innkeeper dream is a stretch without Stede (whom he thinks he is losing to piracy), Ed panics and grabs at the nearest thing - becoming a ‘fisherman’. It’s not optimal, but he is trying to keep the self-actualisation flame alive, even though he might need to do it alone. For Ed at this point, it probably feels like a matter of life and death, physically and spiritually. That the flame dies quickly is because it was a false attempt at self-actualisation which we see parodied in the ‘majesty in fish-scales’ montage.

When Zheng asks Ed to team up to destroy the British, Ed’s lack of enthusiasm for the task couldn��t be more apparent (I’m surprised when I see people say they’re blindsided here by Ed being at the inn at the end, because Ed ‘agreed’ to team up with Zheng. He agreed with less enthusiasm than Stede did to the China plan. His body language screams not gonna happen). It’s not enough that Stede and he will be together in joining Zheng. Ed does not want to be a pirate anymore. He wants and needs at least a crack at the innkeeper dream.

The final scene is Ed’s at least having a shot at true self-actualisation, and in the process, giving Stede a go at it too. Stede has proven people skills, and has shown himself adept at customer service whilst working at Jackie’z. Stede could never even begin to self-actualise in Bridgetown, and the parts of piracy that allowed him to - creativity and purpose - he can do just as well, if not better, as an innkeeper. Both now have Love and Belonging, plus intercourse with orgasms. Whether they will have good food and warmth in their love-shack… well, we trust the OFMD-verse will provide.