#thats its just a vocal small minority

[oifaaa]

Ive never been happier that I'm only on tumblr I've been discussing the new season of Bridgerton with my friends and one of them said "Yeah and people are being so shitty towards the Benedict and francesca reveal" and my reaction was what people??? I've literally seen nothing but excitement at which point they reminded me that twitter and tiktok still exist

[selamat-linting]

its not even the shipping stuff that really pisses me off. its everything about it... a mainstream political page about indonesia thats entirely written in english and mired with stan culture (butchered AAVE) language and chock filled with usamerican pop culture references. the way it only focuses itself on electoralism and voting as the only valid way of political struggle as if we didnt have a struggling yet developing grassroot orgs and protest scenes of our own. its the pessimistic comments of im moving out im moving out of this shithole to europe/usa/aussie/japan.

it paints a segment of indonesian youth who is choking on their own self-hate and powerlessness and yet never even consider to unlearn their own internalized racism and colonial mentalities. very much a slave for the "international rules based order", never wants to learn about the role of imperialism, colonialism, and us-backed intervention in this country and how it perpetuates it in the modern day. but then its not like they want to learn. most of them are in that upper-middle class strata who aspire to leave and be good immigrants and progressive liberals in the imperial core. the actual horrors of the oligarchy never touches them. dont get me wrong, aspiring to work or live abroad isnt bad actually, got get that bag sister, i want to do the same, but the way some of them look down on ppl who dont leave, or absentmindedly paint their own home country as a backwards hellhole that needed saving. ugh. its disgusting.

tbf, theyre just a small yet vocal minority online, theyre very much apathetic from the get-go so its very much me getting annoyed at terminally online losers. but still. ANNOYING AS HELL

also the admin of that page likes hamilton. so obviously i'd hate them.

[fandomshatepeopleofcolor]

PART 1 thats fine ifyou cant watch him because he never openly apologized for his harmful decision 4+yrs ago. but consider: people have also made mistakes doubled down on those and acted harmfully stupid towards certain minority groups but then learned to be better. I personally wouldnt suggest anyone trust him either but I do think people can learn to be better. That he hasnt even mentioned P* and has openly supported BLM LGBTQ+ and women's rights since shows he's moving in the right direction

PART 2 its not enough but imo so long as he stops platforming P* that's already forward step. an apology would rebuild trust but deplatforming public figures is the biggest way to remove vitriol. Mark's content by itself isnt problematic and some of his closest friends who he streams most often with are people who have openly criticized P*. its a small thing but that he creates content with them but not P* is still a statement

PART 3 I apologize the first two asks I sent mightve been wrong tone. I was irritable and shouldn't have let it takeover. The response to the Markiplier info made it seem like no matter what you do as you make a mistake you cant be a better person and that made me feel angry. But people are entitled to their feelings at his lack of apology and not feel comfortable watching him or want to ever forgive him with or without the apology and I need to learn how to let those coexist

____________

I appreciate you worked through your feelings and I encourage people to read your words and really work through their own feelings wrt canceling problematic creators/celebrities.

Like I appreciate your perspective because none of the others who weighed in on Markiplier mentioned that he's supported BLM, LGBTQ+, and women's rights and it makes it more likely that I'll watch him now especially because I'd rather watch someone who's learning and being vocally supportive of marginalized people's causes than not.

If it helps anything at all I used to be OBSESSED with SuperWhoLock and even saw all three hobbit movies in theaters and it wasn't until I did some work on myself and started with these blogs that I really saw that my selfesteem got better the more I watched media with brown ppl as its focus. (JTV, Superstore, Elementary etc) So yes I know people can grow just based on the fact that I used to be pretty problematic myself.

mod ali

[donutdisturblivball]

re: the recent twoset video— pls ignore and dont read under the cut if u dont want any spoilers!

content warnings: mentions of suicide, homophobia, and racism. also— this is a LONG post.

ok so like i got a little worried at first because they imitated the try g*ys set up in the beginning which couldve gone really wrong because the try g*ys handled that situation REALLY WELL and im sick of seeing them be shamed or made fun of for it (SNL skit and NYT article) but it really delved into the hate THEY faced after dropping sell out and a bunch of the comments and DMs they showed were really hateful (some of them were homophobic, others telling them to kill themselves, and there were some that were racist which was really weird bc the groups they support r asian too??? so idk i dont really get those ones) and it’s honestly really clear that thats not even the worst of the hate they received… its just really sad and messed up.

i didnt expect that twoset would address the issue again after the ll40hrs episode we got a day or two ago, but im really glad they did. its oftentimes that overly obsessed fandoms (not just kp0p, tho those fandoms r definitely the more well known ones) can get really really hateful, and in the process they cross a lot of lines and are unapologetic about it. no matter how you twist it, nothing gratifies you with the right to tell others to kill themselves, or to threaten their families. you dont get to call others faggots, and you dont get to make fun of others because of how they look or their race. no one deserves that kind of fear or tasteless hate, no matter what they’ve done. you cant justify that sort of behavior— if who you’re “standing up for” believes that sort of behavior is okay, then a) their morals are WAY out of place, and b) maybe you shouldn’t be standing up for someone who thinks its okay to tell others to off themselves (not saying that bp or anyone condones their fans behavior, just saying that as a fact in general). im nearly 100% sure that whoever ur standing up for would think it to be disgusting and disappointing to know that their supporters are the types of people to wish bodily and mental harm onto others for reasons that aren’t justifiable.

i know for a fact that the people who do these types of things r a minority of the fandom, at least in most cases. it’s just that that minority is so loud that the normal parts of the fandom get drowned out, but its the fact that that minority can be heard and can be/is harmful to others that’s really messed up. i know that not all kp0p fans are as bad as these ones, and i’m friends with a lot of kp0p stans and i know for a fact that they would shame this behavior, but the way that the loud minority has decided to act and continues to act has completely tarnished the name of being a kp0p stan. i know it’s like a “joke” to say stuff like “oh you cant say that, the stans will come for you!” but the thing is that it’s not a joke. you really have to be careful of what u say or else those “stans,” that small but vocal minority will literally come for you.

it’s just so disheartening to see this behavior repeated again and again. you dont know this person’s situation, and you don’t know what they’re going through. being told to kill themselves could totally just be someone’s last straw, and the people who perpetuated that might just celebrate that they got rid of another hater. that type of behavior isn’t normal, and the fact that it’s gone on for so many years atp despite being called out is just so… i don’t know how to describe it.

like— if the tables were turned, and it was the group you’re stanning who was getting harassed by deranged fans, if they were being told to kill themselves, or if they were being called slurs that didn’t apply to them, or if they were being made fun of for the look of their eyes and the way they speak english, that behavior would be just as bad as the behavior that is constantly displayed against twoset and other people for jokes that are made, because it’s literally the same exact thing. if you wouldn’t do it to your faves, then don’t do it to anyone else. no matter if you care about them kr not, that behavior is disgusting and inexcusable in any situation.

going back to the OG video— i hope twoset is okay. they handled the situation really well, i think, and while it doesn’t really seem as though the comments and DMs got to them as much, i still really hope that theyre okay and that they know they’ve got people who love and care about them. i also can’t really imagine my best friend saying all those hurtful things to me, even if i know it’s fake. personally, thats just me and im honestly like— super sensitive (lol) but i also hope that brett and eddy filmed that, then went out and got lots of bubble tea and fried chicken together and just reminded each other abt how much they care and that in any real situation, nothing could come to them calling those each other those things irl (whether that would be a verbal or non verbal confirmation is up to u).

anyway, thats all for this long post lmao.. cheers to twoset and once again im SUPER PROUD of their 4mil stream (deffo not over it at ALL!) and just them in general. i’ve been following them for a few years ish now and just seeing how far theyve come is so 🥹🥹🥹 i hope they continue to make me smile and laugh with many new videos and projects to come. :)

edit; ​coming back here just to clarify i wrote most of this in a pretty emotional state and there r some things abt the video im more than a little iffy on lol but i dont really wanna get into that rn 😭 maybe another post or maybe never ill come back to it

[youngshiney]

saw an interesting article about how bang pd thinks that kpop might be slowing down and an comments/insiders disagreeing. i actually think hes right tho, not necessarily that its slowing down but i think kpop as an industry is in a bubble irt worldwide attention/expansion and its going to pop at some point

point one: album sales. someone said groups are selling millions every comeback which is a true fact. however we know that a majority of those albums end up on the streets, "donated", or end up being thrown away once the inclusions are taken out. the sales are massively and artificially inflated, and thats not sustainable in the long run. at some point consumers will not be able to continue spending that amount of money every comeback.

point two: massive debuts and lots of debuts per year. while there's no shortage of groups that are releasing music every year, how many are actually memorable? is there that much of a distinction between each group that would allow them to grow and remain in the industry for a long while? and musically, what is the draw to these new groups? a distinct sound, incredible talent? and while debuts are becoming more massive every year, does that translate into long term fan retention and promotablity? its great if a group gets millions of views and sales for their debut but what about two years from then? three? if everyone come for the debut and the spectacle of it but doesnt stick around, then how much longer would a group succeed?

point three: resources. theres a huge distinction between the big companies and the small to mid size companies. the big companies have the money and resources to keep funding groups regardless of sales and views and retention, whereas smaller companies most likely dont. that then leads to a disparity between the groups of those companies.

point four: worldwide impact. pd bang also said that kpop is not as hot in the market as we expect, and honestly i think its a bit true. the only kpop song ive ever heard on mainstream radio was jimin's solo debut. jennie's minor role was the first time i saw an idol acting in the us who was marketed as a kpop idol specifically. (this isnt counting the work people like Rain and god's Joon who were in hollywood when i was a kid). groups and idols are going on talkshows for promo but has it translated to gp knowledge at all? and thats only considering the us where theres a massive push in marketing and promotion. outside of that, has kpop actually made a significant impact to markets or are we seeing a very vocal subgroup of consumers? this is excluding places like China, Japan, and a lot of South East Asia where kpop has always had a significant impact on the music and entertainment market.

and it could be that im missing a lot of data and details bc these are just general thoughts from my observations of both my surroundings and what i see/hear online. but honestly, i do think hes right to an extent and i fully believe kpop is a bubble that will pop sooner rather than later

[masterdilucs-c0cksleeve]

albedo + xiao + anyone of your choice if you want to do more! with a s/o thats having a kissing session with them until their hands wander (up their shirt,, in their hair,, or maybe they palm them if you'd like hrlpwjdje) and we end up swallowing their cries or sighs each time they attempt to make a noise? :) love your writings!

Getting Handsy are We?

Thank you for this request Anon! I decided that this would work best as a short fic post. I added Diluc and Venti as well<3

Albedo, Xiao, Diluc, Venti (separately) x gn!reader

Warnings: Implied NSFW, Sexual Touching(lol idk), Minors DNI

Albedo

You were supposed to be studying, reading up on Albedo’s next experiment and the traveller was supposed to be here any minute to help out. But, you were far from reading anything with your hands all over Albedo kissing him just the way he liked. Usually Albedo was the one to take the lead during your make out sessions yet, something had come over you today. You wanted to make him melt in your hands, to be so blinded by pleasure that he had no choice but to submit to you. You kissed down his neck slowly to the star that sits between his collarbones, this action always got you whatever you wanted. Before you knew it Albedo was moaning quietly at every touch, kiss, lick, or nip you gave his flawless porcelain skin. Wanting to push him further, you hands made their way towards the problem that had risen in his pants causing his head to fall back and release and uncharacteristically loud moan.

“Y-y/n-” He moaned as you applied pressure with the palm of one hand while the other found it way under his shirt caressing the toned skin that hid from the icy mountain air.

You tsked at him before bringing you lips back to his savoring every moan and whine that feel from his. You released him from the confines of his pants and you swallowed all the sounds he gave you when skin finally met skin. Who would have thought a little bit of kissing would get you exactly what you wanted.

Xiao

The wind swirled around the two of you and the night lingered on, the view from atop the Wangshu Inn was unbeatable. It was obvious why Xiao spent most of his time up here, secluded, quiet, and peaceful. Most nights you and the quiet yaksha sat up here in each others company gazing at the stars, but tonight something had come over the both of you. You both were ravenous for the other tonight, lips locked in a heated make out session. You straddled Xiao’s lap as he rained kisses down your neck and across your collar bones. It was only when your hands found their way into his teal and black hair that Xiao began to get vocal, his hair was his weak spot. Pretty moans and sighs fell from his lips as he stopped his assault on your skin distracted by your movements.

“more-” Xiao moaned sultry and low, so you kissed him deeply distracting him from anything but you.

He moaned deeply while you kissed him muffling the sound to anyone but you and him. You pushed your hips down on his creating friction between you too causing his pants to feel tight as he grew harder beneath you. His hands found your hips as he guided you to grind down harder and faster, giving your both the friction you yearned for. This cased you both to moan simultaneously drinking in each others sounds. One of your hands found its way to the mint green tattoo that adorned his skin tracing the symbols and curves from memory. The yaksha was vulnerable like this with only you and you lived for that.

Diluc

The stoic and professional winery tycoon caged you against the wooden walls of a small closet inside the tavern he owned. The night was still alive with many  patrons drinking to their hearts content, none the wiser of the two hiding in the back. You had been teasing the redhead all night with light touches here and small remarks there, resulting in a heated make out session with you pressed up against the wall. Diluc was easy to rile up and you knew this all too well as you kissed his lips feverishly, seeming to never have enough of him. You hands tangled into his long red locks as you both moved your hands along the others body. With a soft tug Diluc’s head fell back with a deep moan, exposing his neck to you.

“Now, now Diluc, you wouldn't want any of your dear customers to hear what you are doing with me back here right?” You teased lips ghosting over his collarbone before flattening your tongue against his skin and dragging it all the way up to his ear.

Shivers racked his body as he gave a small nod, submitting to you quite easily. The hand that was in his hair moved to cover his soft lips, telling him to keep quiet before you sank to your knees. 

Venti

The Windrise tree was tall and large, surrounding you and Venti entirely. His hands roamed your thighs as you kissed him deeply. He had picked a higher branch than usual today. If the situation you two were in now has anything to show it’s that this was his intention all along. The two of you had been making out for quite sometime when you decided to take it up a notch. You pushed the bard back against the trunk of the tree as you hovered over him one hand came under his chin as he looked up at you wide eyed.

“Hmm, if I didn’t know better I’d say you planned this.” You teased hands snaking up his legs now.

“And why would I do that? You started kissing me if I recall correctly.” He smiled teasing you right back.

With that you kissed him passionately hands moving closer and closer to his lap where you knew you would get the sweetest sounds from him. You hands barley touched him and moans tumbled from his soft lips. You took every moan he gave and swallowed it down, the more you touched him the more he sang.

Oh how you loved to make your bard sing.

[ruvatia]

Sorry if this is a bit much with everything going on, but could I request a scenario where the Paladins + Matt & Lotor have a black s/o and they’re scared abt everything that’s happening in their country and are sad that racial injustice is happening? I’ve been rlly worried the past few days, but if this is smth too uncomfy I understand ;w; Thank you 💖💖💖

This got really long, I apologize but I turned it into half-headcanons with just the main paladins-- i apologize for not doing all the characters you’ve mentioned, but I don’t think they would fit all in a single post anyways www

On another note I hope you and every other reader take good care of their mental health; it’s important to be aware of what’s going on but it’s also important to be in the right mindspace to be able to tackle everything that’s being shared. It’s pain that’s been boiling for a very long time and there is absolutely no shame in taking some downtime to recover before heading back into current issues.

SHIRO:

If you were saddened, Shiro would suggest that maybe you switch to something else; if there was something that he knows will distract you and temporarily have you be a little more at ease, he’d do that!

But also maybe add a little twist-- extra soft blankets (fresh out of the oven! Screw the bills you’re worth it), extra cheese on your favorite dish, whatever it is that can make your smile a little wider, bigger or brighter just let him know!

Would give you hugs if you asked, but usually Shiro pets your head and brushes your cheek for comfort

He also does this when he wants to ask something of you, but thats another story

Why the TV was still on was a mystery to you, you’d stopped listening a long time ago. Your partner besides you noticed, and you felt the hand around your shoulder tighten his grip a little, bringing you out of your thoughts.

“Hey, maybe we should watch something else?” he asked softly, brushing your cheek with his hand. “I can’t really listen to this anymore.”

“Yeah… Sure.” you replied, though it felt like an automated response more than your actual opinion.

“Okay, I’ll switch to that weird show Pidge recorded the other day, we agreed to watch it, right?” he replied, quickly grabbing the remote to change the program.

The first episode started playing, but the moment that it did, you felt cold as Shiro left your side.

“Where are you going?” you asked, your interlaced fingers the only thing keeping him close.

“Ah, I thought I’d make us something. We both kinda skipped dinner….”

He’d thought about putting something together that you’d like, maybe order dessert to surprise you but seeing the look on your face, leaving your side was the hardest thing to do right now.

So he gave in, and your both fell asleep until the doorbell rang with your delivery.

KEITH:

I have this headcanon that Keith isn’t very good with physical touch but after the end of voltron and after enough time of humanitarian relief, he learns how important it is for someone that’s in a specific state of mind

So the best he has to offer when his words fail is physical touch

Over your time together he’s learned what you need depending on your mood, and it helped him out lots when you were more vocal about it-- if anything he liked it when you asked for things that he could easily deliver, he’d do anything to see you smile

A hand came over your phone screen, Keith’s fingers lacing into yours and making you drop the device onto the crevices of the sofa.

“Why did you--”

“You’ve been staring at that thing for the past hour, biting at your nails.” he said in a worried tone. “That’s enough. We’re going to bed.”

“But it’s just--”

“We’re going to bed.” he repeated in a harsher tone, lifting you off your seat.

Keith sat down onto the bed first, pulling you into him. You both fell onto the bed, Keith quickly pulling the covers over your shoulders before his arms came around you.

“My alarm is my phone.”

“That’s nice, but we both know we have nothing to do tomorrow.” he replied right away, making you chuckle.

“Keith…” you called, your hands sneaking up to his face.

You brushed away some of his hair from his face as he gave you a complicated expression, unable to reflect the small smile you wore. He knew things were shit outside, that being apart from your family and other loved ones was a toll on both you and that lately negative thoughts have plagued you more often than not but Keith, despite his good intention was still somewhat of an awkward man.

“Thank you.”

He kissed you in reply and you both left it at that, glad that he had someone like you to meet him halfway.

LANCE:

Lots of hugs the moment he feels something is off with you

Will be a brat™ for the sole purpose of distracting you, bET

I feel like post-series Lance tries his best to be as observant as Allura and tries to understand others better-- but it didn't take a genius or incredible empath to know why your eyes looked like they were about to overflow at the sight of the news.

I’d like to think that Lance, with a big connected family is one of the paladins that very easily gets what you’re going through, wouldn’t be surprised he’s been called one or two things in his past either

That being said it doesn’t mean that he completely understands your personalized struggles with racial injustices that you encounter everyday; as another minority himself + coming from a culture and upbringing that might be different than yours, its a very different experience.

Memories flooded as the news anchor spoke about “lootings” and as you scrolled down your feed to see feeble attempts at sympathy from local peacekeepers. You sigh and retweet another thread, only to find something equally as shocking right after. You stopped commenting in quote retweets a while ago, you felt like you were constantly repeating that none of this was okay and that a reform was desperately needed. Rather than typing out your thoughts you typed out your name, address and email over and over again, signing one petition after the other.

Hearing sigh after sigh, Lance eventually put an arm around your shoulder. He startled you, but his soft voice made both your shoulders and your guard lower.

“Hey, do you want to make a midnight snack with me? I’m getting kinda hungry.”

“What about that new rule we were talking about? Not eating 4 hours before we went to bed?”

“Every diet has one or two cheat days, don’t they?” he replied, kissing one of your eyelids. “Come on, I’m sure your neck is sore from being like that for so long.”

In the end you both made some soul-food until a food-coma knocked you out until tomorrow. In the morning, you realized that Lance must’ve woken up in the middle of the night because you remember cuddling on the couch, and yet you’re waking up on the bed. Of course, still in his arms.

HUNK:

Having a sensible heart, I feel like both you and hunk would struggle a little about maintaining a healthy distance with current events.

Though overtime he would understand that keeping in touch with everything that’s going on is important, but not at the sake of burning out

His best bet, to him, to pull you out of a such a dark space is with comfort food

“Ok ppl feel like they want to eat a horse but they actually cant when they’re in that mind space Hunk, let’s make something sweet and small; something direct and straight to the point! Let’s add smiley faces on it!”

Your turned down the volume from the news, let your head fall backwards and brought up your forearm over your closed eyes. It felt warm and made it you realize that you had probably been staring very intensely at the screen as a wave of comfort hit your eyes the moment they were drowned in darkness. Letting out a deep breath, you stilled and let yourself bask in your thoughts until a familiar voice brought you back.

“Maybe a little bit more sugar? No, then it would be disbalanced. The base is already so sweet-- Ah, I have to take the cupcakes out or else they might get burned!”

You felt a smile grow on your lips, making you ignore the horrid news being broadcasted to turn to your partner that as usual, seemed to juggle ten thousand things to create a whole meal.

“What’s going on over here?” you asked, leaning over the counter to note that one of your favorite dishes was made and machines that were mostly used for baking had been brought out.

“Oh you know, just a little pick me up for my most favorite person ever.” he shrugged, but a smile soon came to his face. His hands were full but he leaned over, his lips meeting your cheek. “Things outside are a little dark, so I thought we could both use a little something nice.”

He turned on the machine after dropping a drop of dye to make it your favorite color and within a few minutes the icing was finished. Hunk scooped up a small amount on his finger and brought it to his lips and nod.

“Wanna taste?” he asked you, his finger dipping into the icing.

A mischievous grin spread on your features as you took his wrist and let his finger fall on your tongue, the sweetness quickly spreading through your mouth. The yellow paladin shivered as you let his digit hang in your mouth for longer than necessary, letting out a satisfied hum when you returned it to him.

“Tastes perfect.”

PIDGE:

She knew what could be fixed, she knew how to fix it but this meant she was also aware of how long such a transition would take

I think Pidge would be similar to Shiro: whatever she remembers that helps you be at ease, she would defect to that in hopes to maybe distract you for a while.

I don’t think Pidge is a very touchy person either, so if she reaches out to you _physically_ in worry, it’s a very clear sign she’s serious/anxious

I feel like she would reach out in other ways and then if she knew you were in a specific state of mind where touch was not useful, or if she just also wanted to try things out lol

As you watched the twisted information that was being shared on screen, another message caught your attention. Rather than a small red icon in the corner, a small window appeared in the middle of your computer screen.

<I found a way to modify notifications sent to another device.>

The video had stopped, every horrible gif about police brutality was paused and there was nothing else but the small window pidge had thrown onto your screen. You chuckled, and felt a pressure behind your working chair.

Another message popped up.

<You’ve been catching up with twitter for the past two hours. Surely you’re done now?>

A soft laugh came from you, making Pidge release a breath she didn’t know she was holding. You typed out an answer:

<Is it possible to be completely caught up with twitter? I follow like 500 accounts.>

<Okay, but half of them are just cat videos and the other half are just retweets of said videos.>

<Oh here I was thinking that this was an intervention to brighten my mood. We’re dragging each other’s follows now?>

<Oh please like you don’t want to be dragged, with that kind of follow list.>

<I can’t believe you’ve done this.>

You both laughed, before Pidge turned around and tapped your shoulder. She let her hand float in the air, yours coming to join it as a soon as your turned her way.

“Wanna take a nap?” she asked, letting her head fall onto your shoulder. “I had Chip make some hot chocolate, Hunk style.”

You squeezed her hand, putting your computer on sleep mode.

“Yeah, that sounds nice.”

[natromanxoff]

4 - It ain't much I'm asking

Greetings from a very wet Sydney.

Having just checked my emails I've received a few comments, via Jacky's office, about this stuff I've been writing. They were all very nice, so a quick thank you to all my loyal readers. A couple of months ago I wrote to Jacky saying how good the Jazz Web was, and lo and behold I got a message from Sam, no questions, just a hello. Great site mate, keep up the good work, and if I'm ever in Perth we will certainly have a party.

Here are a few questions all rolled into one answer:

Did the band have a favourite dressing room song they'd warm up to?

Since you obviously saw lots of Queen shows, did it just become routine or was each show exciting?

Were there ever huge rows before a concert which meant they went onstage furious?

When the band were onstage, were you just offstage the whole time?

Did the band do the soundchecks or was it left up to the specialists paid to do them?

Was the atmosphere easy and jokey most of the time?

The band always did their own soundchecks. On very rare occasions Freddie would miss one so he could rest up and not strain his voice. The crew would get it as near as possible so it was easier when the band turned up, but there's no way they could ever get it exact. After the soundcheck all the guitars were taken to a separate room where there would be a small amp and guitar tuner. About half an hour before show time Brian and John would go into the tune-up room and re-tune their guitars so they were perfect when they went on. The piano was tuned before soundcheck and then again after.

Roger would have some sticks in the dressing room and would bash chairs and tables, and sometimes my head, so his hands were flexible. When they were dressed and ready to go on, Roger and Freddie would screech. They didn't have a song to loosen their vocal chords, they would just screech these high pitched noises. I can assure you it didn't sound very musical to me.

I can't remember them ever going on stage pissed off with each other. Even though I've done every show since N.A.T.O. and up to and including the Tribute concert, I've never actually 'seen' one. I was always onstage and usually behind the little drummer boy, so all I saw the back of their heads and their bums.

The shows were never routine as such, even though the stage was set exactly each time, and the set list would change very little from the start to the finish of a tour. During the show you always had to be alert and expect the unexpected because it's impossible for anyone to tell when a string or drumskin is going to break, or a bass drum pedal. If a string broke, Brian would swap guitars and Jobby would change the string and re-tune the whole guitar and get his beloved Red Special back to him as quick as possible. If a stick broke Roger would just change sticks, he had about a dozen hanging on his floor tom-tom. If the bass drum pedal broke I would grab a new one and dive on to the riser, lying face down between his stool and the floor toms. Most of the time he will have moved his foot as much as possible, but if he hadn't I would tap his ankle so he knew I was there and he would move his foot so the offending pedal could be swapped.

There was usually a fun feel about everything, we even got up to a few pranks on stage, band included. In the days before cordless mics, Freddie and Brian would move around so much that their leads would become a mass of spaghetti, and Ratty would run on to untangle the mess and Fred and Deaky would sit on him. Needless to say, revenge was sweet. While I'm on about stage antics I should tell you about Spike in Sun City. I won't tell you the bands nicknames but most people had one, and as Spike was the new boy he wasn't really Royalty, just a minor one, so he became 'The Duke'. As you know, the Duke played keyboards, he also played guitar on Hammer To Fall, and during Crazy Little Thing would play Freddies grand piano. (talented little bugger isn't he) After Crazy, Fred would say to the audience "Ladies and Gentlemen, on keyboards, Mr Spike Edney". With that Spike would take a bow and go back to his own little corner. We were supposed to do 11 shows, but had to cancel 3 because Freddie completely lost his voice. On the day of the sixth show somebody found a huge green board which just said 'TO LET' in white letters.

During one song, can't remember which one, the Duke would start the song and was finally lit so he could be seen. When the lights came on him we lifted up the board behind him, and with the help of some white tape, it now had an arrow pointing at him and the sign read 'TOILET'. The next night Collie had found a bra (don't ask), and when he hung the guitar over the Dukes neck at the start of Hammer, had fixed the bra to the guitar strap and had it screwed up in his hand so it couldn't be seen. Spikey then ran on stage and got into his heavy metal pose and didn't realise that the garment was swinging around for all to see.

One more night so we had to go out in style. A few minutes before we were to leave the dressing room and head for the stage I got Freddie on his own, and said to him "When you introduce Spike at the end of Crazy, could you get him over with you and introduce him from your mic." He replied "Sure, but why?" I said "He'll love it, right at the front, center stage with the singer, its good for his ego." Fred said OK, and then I added " After you've spoken, do me a big favour and get out of the way." He looked puzzled but agreed. Crazy finished and our beloved singer remembered his cue, he beckoned the Duke into the middle, made his usual announcement and moved well over to Brian's side. While the Duke was lapping up his moment of glory, six of us ran on stage, from every angle possible, and each of us had a huge cream pie which we smacked straight into his face, there was cream everywhere and he was a mess. He has a good sense of humour and took it very well, and the band thought it highly amusing as well. Welcome to Queen tours Duke.

Thats it for now, I'm outta here.

Crystal

[emblemxeno]

Anon Asks about Three Hopes Spoilers

If your ask isn’t here, it may be in the queue!

Apparently there is a 4th route once you beat the other three (heard this from others so take it with a grain of salt) so maybe the reason why all the routes end in a cliffhanger is to set up the ‘True ending’. The Sonic Adventure games are the best example of this I can think of and I hope that’s what they’re doing cause if the ending is locked behind dlc that’s scummy as hell

There’s been rumors of a true ending that unlocks after playing all routes. That’s the only thing that can save the game for me at this point. Not even Dimitri getting character assassinated the least is making want to buy it.

That's what I hope for, but I'm always skeptical. It would be really scummy if they just saved it for DLC.

*spoilers* so question, since you can avoid byleth and jeralt in the respective chapters and recruit them, I wonder if doing so in all three routes via ng+ will have a different outcome or not vs not saving byleth and jeralt and keeping them as enemies? maybe arval’s dialogue may switch around?

I don't know myself, but I think Jeralt surviving creates the alternate path in one of the chapters, cuz his death leads to Byleth's rampant hostility against Shez

...and I already have seen some Edelstans complain that Dimitri is an asshole because he just left Edelgard there in AG ending. Like wtf. Yes She has been controlled to do awful things but she started the war voluntarily. Is that too  much to ask Dimitri reach his hands towards her? That's why I have problem with AG ending because it just like shift the responsibility. Still AG overall is much better than GW.

Can’t say I’m surprised. It’s weird that Edelgard apparently got reverted to “a child like mindset”, but at least he didn’t kill her? If I were them I’d look for the small victories.

I remember when Fates came out, people were so pissed that Revelations was locked behind DLC. I was okay with that, since Conquest and Birthright were at least complete games. 3 Hopes ending on cliffhangers, which will presumably be “fixed” with DLC, is inexcusable. I just wonder, due to the sheer popularity of Three Houses, if people will even care.

GOD, SAME! Like, people can complain all they want about Fates’ business model, but at least you’re paying for 3 separate campaigns, with uniqe maps and stories, and each route has an actual conclusion! Is everything solved? No, but at least the main conflict is over! Three Hopes just... what???

I know this will probably be a hot take idk. But by removing Byleth and whiteclouds/silver snow the game loses a lot depth and lore. You loose the ability to understand and bond with the green family. Which ruins the impact of siding with them or caring about Rhea at all. Rather you recruit Byleth or not has zero impact on the story. Which is such a weak willed move to do its like removing Corrin from Few1 because a vocal minority hated Corrin. Crests somehow end up even less important. 1/2

Its incredibly stupid marketing to as the game hypes up the Shez Byleth rivalry. Which in the end don’t matter because the lore doesn’t matter. What they did to Claude is also so strange. Its like they took offense to people saying “good guy” Claude wouldn’t fight Dimitri at grondors. By making him Pepsi Nitro Edelgard. At the cost of his own interesting under developed concept of using church for his own goals. But thats not even consistent thanks to Claudes SB actions. Also what happened 2/3

to three houses redemption themes with Rhea and Dimitri. Heck the revenge themes are even watered down. In a game were the empire and ancient evil king are called revenge. The only thing they did right is war is pointless and endless. But the war in three houses was only a handful of chapters. 3/3

All of this! Like, I get that it’s a spinoff musou and they don’t wanna tread the same water here, but not having any closure on the Nabateans when you bothered to show them in the first damn cutscene? Warping character motivations from the ground up? Hyping up a conflict that doesn’t even impact the main plot that much at all? I think it’s incredibly shoddy.

Do you think the FE fandom (specifically the 3H fandom) is going to enter the Voltron post-s8 phase after 3 hopes/nopes?

LMAOOOOO, I don’t think we’re in fear of going that far, but damn it’s gonna get annoying as hell

I like Fates and the way I feel about 3 Hopes is what they like to claim Fates is: good gameplay with bad story. I’m holding out for a Revelation route to fix this mess.

At the end of the day, it’s a non-canon musou that gets a lot of lore and story shit wrong, so if there’s a fix it route, all we can hope for is some kind of cheesy “friendship saves everyone” last hurrah

from what i have seen there seems to be three versions of Claude’s fate in SB, and the ending will be changed according to the fate of Claude.

1, Claude betrayed empire earlier, died on fighting the Empire, alliance revolts against empire in the ending txt.

2, Claude did not die and he betrayed empire in the ending text, fought empire with beleaguered Kingdom. The war seems have no end.

3, Claude stay allied with the empire, only Kingdom left for the empire to be taken, arguably the best ending for the empire.

do not know what are conditions though, maybe are related to the death/survival of Byleth & Arval.

Interesting. IMO, idk why they have different versions of the endings when they all end in a cliffhanger anyway. Guess they wanna give some semblance of “your actions matter”?

The is game has me on an emotional rollercoaster man. I just saw the King Awakens cutscene on YouTube. I don’t ship Dimidue, but think their platonic relationship is one of the best in the game. I know you don’t like Byleth, but I do and I ship Dimileth and fucking Shez is stealing their moments; that quip should have been the Felix/Byleth BFF moment. I need to get off the internet.

That cutscene is so cute!!! And yeah, Byleth’s not my favorite, but it’s mostly how the story goes around them rather than the character themself. I actually quite like the whole “emotionless merc grows feelings and attachment to their students” arc, and it’s a shame to see that none of it is here because of OC Infinite the Hedge-merc

[janeyseymour]

I saw the second preview of six and here are my thoughts (along with a few fun stories at the end):

My heart literally fell out of my ass when the queens started walking out They changed a few small little things here and there and it was perfect If six doesn’t win best lighting at the Tony’s I will sue Ex-wives was WOW I literally could not stop smiling Some of the poses were different 

ADRIANNA FREAKING NAILED NO WAY

I am convinced she just is beyonce always

She’s just fantastic in that role and that’s what I have to say about that

Ig abby danced a little too hard during no way because she kept messing with her wig after

Actually she lowkey played with it throughout the whole show and it was adorbs

Britt was helping her fix it and like pointing out where it was a little cray (also abby’s wig looks so good omf)

ANDREA IS- WOAH DURING DLYH

Her delivery throughout the whole show was a bit more mature, but it was still so babey I love her

(On a side note someone today told me I look like Andrea, which is very kind but so untrue because I literally look like a broken thumb and she is gorgeous)

Her “IM NOT SORRY” was amAZING

She like low-key cut made the whole head joke short and im kinda sad ab it, but it was still fantastique

Through the “Wearing Yellow To A Funeral Bit” abby looked confused through the entire thing and I was cracking up

HEART OF STONE HOLY SHIT

She was INCREDIBLE and her dress was so pretty and sparkly and I just wow 

Shes just so pretty in general like ma’am how do you do that please drop the skin care routine 

The emotion that was conveyed was enough to make me tear up BUT I DID NOT CRY AND I AM VERY PROUD OF THAT 

she did the “you lift me high” line and kinda went into this airy place in her voice and it was angelic and heavenly and all the good things

HER RIFFS WERE JUST DFJDHJLFH

She was just fantastic and thats all I have to say 

Thats a lie I have so many things to say about that woman but the time will come

HOH was a whole acid trip there was a point during this song where I literally just took it all in and then thought “Janey, you really spent your hard earned money to go on an acid trip for a solid few minutes good job”

Their dancing is hilarious and thats that

ABBY SAYING “BUT WE CANNOT GUARANTEE THAT YOU’LL STILL WALK AT FORTY” I had to stifle a laugh because my queen is indeed 40

THE GERMAN ACCENTS HAD ME QUAKING

Brittney Mack is… all bad bitch energy and I was living for it

She is a queen

When she did the “my horses can trot up to twelve miles an hour”- in the boot (not that I watch those…) abby is always making a 😳😶😲 kind of face and this time she just couldn’t stop smiling and it made me laugh

WOOF

Her reveal was SO GOOD she literally just started checking out her nails while everyone just applauded… AS THEY SHOULD

When britt told the person to get up, this person full on WENT and britt was like shook it was hysterical

THE INTERLUDE BETWEEN GET DOWN AND THEN KAT’S ROAST WAS ICONIQUE

i dont think it was here but I cant remember where it was but BRITT WAS PLAYING WITH ABBY’S WIG AND IT WAS REALLY CUTE SHE WAS LIKE PLAYING WITH THE ENDS OF IT AND AWH

justice for the beheaded cousins 

BOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOO BABY MARY HAD THE CHICKEN POX AND YOU DIDN’T GET TO HOLD HER HAND… YOU KNOW ITS FUNNY BECAUSE WHEN I WANTED TO HOLD MY NEWBORN SON…. IIIIII DIIIIIIEDD. Abby lowkey went feral and I loved every second of it and then her pose after got so many laughs it was truly amazing

THE K HOWARD ROAST WAS JUST SO GOOD IT WAS SO GOOD

Aywd destroyed me

I also teared up here but I did not let those babies fall because I was not about to ruin my look

justice for my pink queen

Her delivery is insane and honestly its gotten better and I didn’t even know that was possible because WOW SHE WAS ALREADY STUNNING BUT DAMN MY HEART GOT RIPPED OUT OF MY CHEST

The whole “Catherine not singing” bit was fantastic

Abby looked so confused the entire time 

Andrea’s “hahaha what” was perfecto 

when Anna said “should we really be doing this” someone in the audience went “yes” very loudly and made the queens break for a solid second abby almost forgot to say her line and you could barely hear it because the audience was laughing at the rando 

Anna acknowledged it and just went “I know” before turning to the queens and saying “I know” it was hysterical 

“I’m Catherine parr, I draw the line in arbitrary places bLaH bLaH bLaH”

THE CLAPPING- BRITT GOT IN HER FACE AND JUST *CLAP. CLAP. CLAP.”  It was the funniest thing oh my gosh

“Are you sure Catherine? I-we don’t mind if you wanna sit this one out… I mean you must be exhausted from all those backing vocals”

IDNYL WAS INSANE AND ANNA UZELE IS WICKED TALENTED LIKE DANG

I dont know if this was intentional or not but when they all start to understand the purpose of parr’s thing- abby is the last to stand up and in my head im like “no yeah that makes sense because shes “the one he truly loved” and shes still trying to get to a point where shes realizing he wasn’t all that great and I dont know I just really like that minor detail

The whole “remember that I was a writer…” part got loud cheers, especially from abby it was very cute

She did a new riff on the “we all disappear” line and WOW my eyes went so wide it was so good I was genuinely shook

the “i dont get it” was sooo good

“My sixth finger” was said so casually and so determinedly that it was a whole new joke and I loved it

“Everyone notices Jane cant dance” -abby just looking so sad

“Yeeeaaaahhhhh. I read!” Was so cute and she sounded so proud of herself it was adorbs

The way they just stood there awkwardly was amazing and got so many laughs it was so good

When sam said the line about competing, abby really almost cut Anna’s line out but she caught herself and it was funny I dont know if anyone else noticed it, but I did and it was glorious

REMIX

“Rise abo-o-o-o-ove” WAS BEAUTIFUL THEY WERE IN SUCH GOOD HARMONY

AGAIN, ANNA’S RIFFS HOW DOES THAT WOMAN DO THAT AT THE END OF THE SHOW LIKE SHIT

After it was over, of course it got long applause and the entire time abby was doing her like “sparkle hands” but also awkwardly moving her arm kinda like a noodle and then going back to sparkle hands and it gave me a good chuckle

Six

The slow acoustic part was so soft I died

The harmonies was delicious

The audience was so hype

Megasix

Super hype

Amazing

Fantastic

All the good things ever

Basically it was just adorable and amazing and absolutely stunning

The new costumes are gorgeous and the lighting is wild if they don’t win best lighting for Tony awards I will full on riot

Aragon and Boleyn interacted a lot and so did Seymour and Cleves and it was very very sweet

Abby interacted with the band a lot to the point where she almost missed a cue and it was very endearing

AND THEN THEY DID THE CURTAIN UP THING AND FIRST OF ALL WOW THEY ARE ALL SO CUTE AND IT WAS SO SWEET SEEING THE WAY THEY ALL WATCHED EACH OTHER WHILE THEY WERE SINGING AND I JUST JDKFDJLA

abby’s hair is SO LONG but I am here for it

So I was looking for my friend when I hear “Make some room, make a path!” From a security guard, and the queens legit walked RIGHT PAST ME

I wanted to go to the theatre anyway to take pictures, but when I saw them, I did follow them back to the theatre because wow I wanted to bask in their glory I didnt even want to talk to them I just wanted to be in their presence

So im like, walking behind them when this happens:

I guess abby saw someone she knew because I heard this “abby!” And then she was like “OH MY GOD” and like RAN to hug them and i legit almost walked right into her/got stepped on but i freaking stopped like a noob i should’ve just let her run me over but I did not I just stopped in my tracks and let out a soft “aH” and then went around her

And then I got to meet a friend and apparently toby heard us squealing and watched us hug for a solid however long so that was awkward

And Julia schade was like talking to him and stared at us for a good amount of time

And then I was walking away and passed Julia again and she kept looking at me, but she was talking to someone else and I think she thought I was going to stay to talk to her (and I would have loved to) but I didnt I just gave her a smile, a nod, and a little wave because I can not do confrontation like if I could not confront abby ma’am I cannot confront u either I am SHY

And that is a very detailed run down of my time in nyc at the brooks

[bonny-kookoo]

Packed Love (BB AU!, JJK x Reader) 💜(🔪)(🔞)

🍱 Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader (Bunny Boy AU!)

🍱 Genre: Yandere AU!(Although very minor mentions of it), fluff, slight mentions of smut at the end

🍱 Warnings: Look mom, I can write stuff that's not nasty! Its literally just pure fluff

🍱 Summary: Jeon Jungkook hated his birthday. But considering that his birth also meant he'd been able to meet you, it wasn't so bad, after all.

This is only sidecontent! The full work can be found here:

Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3

Jungkook hated his birthday.

There was no easy way to put it. He was never really vocal about the date he had been born into this world, and always made sure that everyone around him knew he wasn't joking or compliment-fishing whenever he said he did not want anyone to even acknowledge his date of birth. No one really questioned it, figuring that the young boy had his issues for a reason; they didn't really pry. He kind of liked that about them.

However, now he wasn't alone anymore.

She knew from a look onto his ID-Card once at what exact day he'd been born, a pure accident. Otherwise she would've shamefully had to admit that it completely never crossed her mind. Her own birthday was something she forgot herself almost every year; so maybe that was why she was adamant to remember his.

When she showed up at his workplace, she couldn't spot him at all. To be fair however, she'd never visited him at all- she only remembered the place from a past visit when he'd forgotten something at work like his wallet or his phone charger. It sometimes happened, yet she'd never left the car during these small visits, always listening to Jungkook to stay behind.

"You lost?" A tall guy asked, surprisingly with no malicious intent in his voice whatsoever. He seemed friendly, curious on why she was there- well, she could see how it looked a bit weird to see a young girl dressed in a white summer dress at a dirty motor shop like this.

"I uh.. I'm looking for Jungkook?" She asked, and the guy smiled, nodding before he wiped his hand with a towel nearby, silently telling her to wait. She took the time to really look around for a moment, many machines and tools she had no clue where for what laying around, making her wonder if Jungkook knew how to use all of this. He was truly an amazing young guy- even though she was a bit biased, maybe. But whenever she asked him something, he seemed to have an explanation for it, no matter how weird or insignificant her questions seemed. She adjusted the small bag in her hand, the box containing some homemade cake and lunch for him suddenly feeling heavy. What if he didn't want anything? What if it tasted bad? Or what if she'd overstepped a boundary by coming here? She knew he didn't like that, so what if-

"Angel?" His voice asked, as he walked towards her with wide eyes, looking like he'd rushed all the way towards her as he stopped in front of her, checking if she was okay. "Everything alright? What're you doing here?" He asked, and she looked at the grinning guy behind Jungkook for a moment, his teasing eyes evident. Jungkook was ready to throw a comment his way, as he'd beat the young boy to it.

"Take a break romeo, but no funny business." He said, and someone else working underneath a car she hadn't noticed yet laughed at that, making her jump a bit. Jungkook led her outside, before opening a door to a small break room it seemed, lights flickering as they turned on with a bit of hesitation, probably due to age.

"Is everything okay? Did something happen?" He asked suddenly, as she shook her head, cheeks now dusted pink at the fact she had to come clear on her intentions now. She simply but the small cotton bag down, revealing the stacked lunch box. Sure, it was sadly not the most plain one, pastel blue and white with numerous stickers on it, but you didn't own anything else. You also had no idea what to really get him- since you didn't have a job, you didn't have much money. And buying him a present with his own money seemed.. weird. He simply looked at it, opening the boxes to reveal their contents; neatly placed and decorated with outmost care. Jungkooks eyes widened at the view, fresh scent hitting him as well as the warmth radiating off of the savory foods where his fingers touched the box, showing him that you'd just finished cooking, and went to bring it immediately. You'd dedicated time and effort into this, for him, for his birthday. He didn't even care at this point how you knew;

because for the first time, he felt happy receiving something for his birthday.

"I uhm.. if you don't like it I'm-" She started, yet couldn't finish as he'd leaned over, holding her cheek in his hand as he kissed her deeply, gratitude a prominent taste on his lips as his hand moved, now buried into her hair.

"Don't-" He started, pecking her lips once more before he chuckled. "Don't finish that sentence. I love it." He said, kissing her again as she giggled. "I love it. I love you. Thank you." He said, before finally letting her breathe, sitting down to eat.

Truth be told, he'd eat it even if it had tasted bad, just because she'd dedicated so much time and effort to making it, but he had to actually admit that it tasted absolutely amazing. It filled his soul with warmth in a way he hadn't been able to feel for a long time, making him almost teary eyed as he scarfed everything down.

He looked at her as she'd placed her elbows on the table, chin resting on her palms as she watched him with a fond smile. He smiled back, as he picked up a piece of meat with his chopsticks, holding it out to her lips as she tilted her head. "Open up Angel." He said, and she blushed a bit before parting her lips, letting him feed her as he smiled. "When did you even make this?" He asked, wondering since it was barely 12. She simple shrugged, as she spoke.

"I woke up right after you left for work, and then started right away." She said, and his eyes widened. He gets up at 5, and he knew for a fact that she hated to get up early. How pure and angelic could she really get? Jungkooks eyes softened as he picked up another piece of food, resting his own cheek now on his palm as he watched her take what he gave her without hesitation. So obedient. "I messed up the cake once, so I had to do it again." She said, and it was only now he noticed the red stripe on the back of her hand, something he'd first brushed off as maybe a simple mark from the way she'd carried something or whatever. But.. she'd gotten hurt? Because of him? She seemed to sense his uneasiness as she immediately tried to calm him. "Nothing bad happened though, it doesn't hurt at all- I'm just clumsy, thats all!" She said, and he nodded, deciding to leave it at that. He would keep an eye on her from now on though.

"I'm finishing my shift soon- do you want to stay here, or do you want to go home?" He asked, knowing her answer already. She still had her drivers license- she was technically free to take his car and come back later to pick him up, but ever since the accident, she'd refused to sit behind the steering wheel- much to his pleasure. He never liked the fact that she drove anyways. He could deal with her in the kitchen, he'd already made sure no Knife was too sharp anyways. So when she shook her head, he already had a plan for her. "Okay. My stuff is right there, where my Jacket is. You can stay here, I'll leave my phone with you. I'll hurry, and then we'll go home, alright?" He asked, and she looked at him innocently.

"Don't you want to go somewhere on your birthday?" She asked, and he closed the now empty food containers with a grin, before he leaned over, brushing some hair away from her face.

"Oh angel-" He said, voice low as his eyes stuck to her lips. "the only place I want to be after I finish here is between your legs."

[femboty2k]

Long post about something I think about a lot and that doesn’t matter to anyone else but me probably

I’m sure there’s a million posts out there on why good representation is important and good but I just wanted to talk shortly about something that happened to me in a recent span of a few months involving a character in a dumb game about collecting jpegs of anime women and hunky dudes with giant swords.

There’s a game called Granblue Fantasy, its an extremely popular gacha game/JRPG with a very large roster of characters and a lot of stuff to do as far as reading through character lore, fighting JRPG battles, raids, and basically playing VNs for character dialogue. It’s a pretty good game, and one of the coolest things about it, is it has (to my knowledge, I dont play/keep up with it very often) 2 canon trans characters. One is named Cagliostro, an alchemist who was born as a man but through extensive experimentation and some self discovery has since transitioned into a woman, hell bent on making herself as cute as possible. Fun right? She’s presented extremely well and is one of the game’s more fun characters. The second character is one that has become a personal favourite for me for many reasons, her name is Ladiva.

Ladiva is a part of a race of people called the Draph. The Draph are a humanoid, and pretty much human looking, race of people with their defining features being their large stature and bovine like horns and ears. This is important because male draph are usually much larger and more muscular than female draph (but its a horny anime game so who can say they’re surprised lol). Ladiva, as my discussion here makes obvious, is a trans woman belonging to these folk. Because of this, she’s both quite large, muscular(and more masculine presenting on the surface), and has rugged looking facial hair. The surprising thing about her presentation in comparison to how she looks, is that she’s presented incredibly well. despite her appearance being not as feminine as it could be (with Cagliostro even offering to make her a new totally feminine body only to have Ladiva refuse, stating that she should love her own body along with the rest of herself) she’s treated as what she is, a woman.

So why am I talking about this? Why am I putting my poorly put together thoughts on this tumblr post no one will read? Well, I am trans. I have felt a certain way about myself all my life that I’m sure most trans people can echoe so I won’t wast time waxing poetic about how I’ve always felt more feminine than I was “supposed” to be. My core purpose of this post comes from the fact that I am 6′2, nearly 300lbs of muscle/fat/body hair, and have had a full beard since I was 14. I am EXCEEDINGLY masculine, which has made my own internal struggle with my transness sort of difficult to accept. A sort of constant push and pull of wanting to just repress it all because I already pass as a man and wanting to work towards being who I know I actually am. Another factor is that I never felt truly comfortable with purely feminine pronouns. In highschool I went by a different name, and I used she/her pronouns and for a while it felt okay. But it was always just, okay. It never felt right on top of several people giving me some rather hurtful backlash for it and how it contrasted so much with my physical appearance. So I stowed it all away until about a year ago. I now have something that I didn’t have before, a truly wonderful and supportive group of adult friends who treat me like an adult as well and take me seriously. So through careful examination of how I felt i began trying new things to explore my identity. It began with me deciding I wanted to use they/them pronouns, this stuck and still feels like its the right thing for me along with the label of Nonbinary. However, slotting myself into this new label and finally feeling comfortable in an identity brought about new thoughts as well as new things to mull over in my head. Things like the fact that most nonbinary representation in media falls under the same category of a waifish AFAB person who presemts femininely if not androgynous, and how people like me are a vocal minority within the community itself even being excluded by a small portion of it. It was a new set of things to tackle and think about. But that aside, with them came the most important thing I asked myself, “am I comfortable with how I am now? Or do those thoughts I had all those years ago mean something?”

This question isnt easy. Gender is a strange subject and is different to everyone who experiences something with their identity, so I wont pretend like I have any definitive answers for anything because, there arent really any of those. The question for myself, boiled down to “Am I more comfortable identifying as transfeminine, or am I comfortable with just being nonbinary.” This question vexed me for a little while. It hurt to think about. A lifetime of bullying and being made to be ashamed of my body type and stature had made my confidence in myself rather lackluster. This made the decision more difficult. It would be easy to try and own a sense of pride in being a masculine presenting nonbinary person. There aren’t many of those in representation as I mentioned before, and at the time it made me feel nice to think that it was what I wanted. But those thoughts I had all those years ago did mean something, and thats not who I am. The answer I ultimately came to, was that I am trans, and want to present more feminine than masculine, because that’s who I know I am, and not just what I think would be easiest. So, to bring it all together, how the everloving fuck does this relate to a character from a gacha game? Well, when i first saw Ladiva I nearly wrote her off as a character that probably was used as a disrespectful  joke on trans women and how they’re viewed. She’s not though. She has an entire montra of loving herself and others for who they are and owning every aspect of herself, including her body. She’s not a small lady, she’s a large/muscular wrestler who, in no mistake of words, still looks very masculine, right down to her facial hair. But none of that matters, not her appearance, not her beard, not her height, she’s still a woman and she’s seen as one by the others around her because, well, that’s what she is. She makes it known and others accept, or at the very least, respect it. It was something entirely new to see something like this in a form of popular media, and in turn it gave me an odd sense of self confidence in my own current appearance, even though I do intend on changing it through HRT and other means (exercise and other health related means). It meant a lot to me to see someone who was, in at least some way, like me who was loved by the community of the game she was in. And it still does. In conclusion, Ladiva is a very cool character, and her existing gave me a boost of confidence that helped lead me towards accepting things about myself that I had found it hard to previously. Go look into Granblue if you like games like that, there’s even a fighting game that came out not too long ago. Thanks for reading, if you did, this whole post is long and kind of dumb because I’m kind of dumb. But I wanted to put it somewhere. Have a nice day <3

[whosaysitsfantasy]

Juke/Maddison & Charlie

So I just want to address something about Juke and then I’m literally not going to talk about it again, because I’ve seen a few posts about people shipping the actors and then people hating on the ship a little bit because of the age gap and it’s just been frustrating me so I wan’t to kinda get this out and then just get back to enjoying the show. Also Apologies if this upsets anyone but these are my opinions and you in no way have to agree with them I just ask that you read my thoughts fully before passing judgment and to please be respectful.

Here is what I think it is ok to do:

Shipping Luke and Julie together. Why? Because in the show they are both teenagers (16/17). I saw someone say it was kinda gross because the boys should be like 42? which I think is a little ridiculous because if they had lived sure they would have been 42 or w.e. but they didn’t... they died, and it is  canon that to them no time has passed. What this means is that the boys are still mentally, emotionally and physically 17 years old. For this reason the characters are perfectly capable of being together and their biggest obstacle remains Luke being a ghost lol. 

Here is what I think it is NOT ok to do: 

Shipping Maddison and Charlie together in real life. Now I’m going to break down for you why this is gross and not ok and why saying “when she’s 18 he can date her” is also not ok. 

A 16 year old and a 22 year old have two completely different maturity levels. A 16 year old can be mature absolutely but that doesn’t mean that they are at the  same maturity level as a 22 year old. I’m 26 and I can tell you that my maturity changed DRASTICALLY between the ages of 16-24. I use to think I was very mature when I was 16. When I hit 22 and looked back at who I was I realized that I was not nearly as mature as I believed I was and now at 26 I can clearly see the differences in who I was as a person at these ages. I can guarantee that most people (if they’re self aware enough) would agree that their maturity level was completely different as a teenager then it was once they hit their twenties. A lot of this has to do with the simple fact that in your 20′s you’ve typically gained more life experience through jobs, and relationships and higher education your brain has also developed more. Now. Maddison is definitely mature for her age in no way am I claiming she isn’t however it is still very obvious through different interviews and lives I’ve seen of her and of Charlie that they are not at the same level. Mentally, emotionally, physically.They definitely have more of a brother/sister friendship. It’s clear that they care about each other and they can of course get a long as friends but friendship and an intimate relationship are two completely different things. Maddison and Charlie’s maturity’s work fine as a friendship but if you were to factor in intimacy and romance it quickly becomes problematic. Some people might still think that the maturity levels don’t matter. I’m here to tell you it does. 

While I don’t think that Charlie would be the type of guy to ever pressure a girl he is with, that doesn’t mean that the pressure would not still exist. If they were to hypothetically date Maddison could easily feel pressured into participating in things she might not really feel ready for like certain intimate acts, parties ect because she want’s to please her partner or because she might feel like this is what she SHOULD be doing rather then doing what she is emotionally and mentally ready for. That pressure can easily influence someone of a young age who hasn’t had many experiences into doing things they eventually regret or doing things that end up having a negative impact on their mental health and the way they view themselves or even how they view healthy/unhealthy relationships down the line. Now Maddison seems smart and has a good support system but your support system can’t protect you 24/7 in an intimate relationship no matter how hard they try which is why a lot of teenagers end up going through something that they end up wishing they hadn’t done because they didn’t know any better. To also say that he can just “wait” for her to turn 18 is just predatory and gross and suggests that it’s still ok to pursue someone of a young age so long as you wait till they are legal which it is not that still means you wanted to be with a minor even if you wait till they are 18.

Also it is important to note that an actors personal life is NONE of your business. An Actors job is to perform in the show/play/movie that they have been hired to perform in and to then promote that project. That’s it. That is all they owe you and anything else is entirely up to their discretion. You are not owed information about their personal lives and you are not owed a say in who they date. If you like two actors who are dating and you think they are cute that’s fine, if they are sharing their relationship and you want to support it that is fine but you have to understand boundaries. I’ve seen fans overstep in a LOT of fandoms (one example being Lili and Cole from Riverdale) where they attack other people for being close to the people in the relationship or they bother the actors to update them about their relationship ect. It’s disrespectful and it’s honestly not your place regardless of if they have shared information about a relationship previously. It’s also not cool to try to pressure the actors into dating, you don’t know what they are actually like irl you have no idea if they are actually compatible you do not have a full picture of the situation and for that reason your opinion should be kept to yourself.

Finally I want to address the whole Luke & Julie kissing issue because I totally understand why people are a little uncertain about it due to the age gap. Now normally I’d be a little put off by it but I am actually ok with the idea of Luke and Julie kissing on screen and I’m just going to list off quickly below why I think it’s ok and why I wouldn’t get upset if it happened.

1. It is very clear that Maddison’s family (specifically her dad) are very involved with Maddison and her job on JATP. Mr.Reyes is often shown on set with her at rehearsals and during shooting. He was there when they practiced the perfect harmony dance which I personally thought was kinda intimate. I feel better about it because I know she has a strong support system who will be there to ensure that if a kiss DID happen she would be safe because she has her family looking out for her on set.

2. Much like above both Kenny and Charlie are very respectful people who very clearly have a lot of respect and love for Maddison. I also don’t think they would ever put Maddison into a position she was uncomfortable with. If a kiss DID happen I am sure there will be a lot of conversations about it and it would be done in a respectful healthy way.

3. This is a job. They are not kissing because they like each other in real life they are not pursuing anything romantically. They are performing a job that they are being paid for in front of a group of people also performing a job. This for me helps me feel less gross about it because even though they are actually kissing it’s not a ‘real’ romantic kiss. It’ll be a staged one that they have gone over and discussed at length with Kenny.

4. This is a Kenny Ortega project. The show has very clearly established that the relationships are about more than physical intimacy. IF we get a kiss between Julie and Luke we are not going to get more then a PG rated kiss.. hell probably more of a G rated kiss. Not only because this is a project by Kenny but because the actors are different ages. It is also unlikely that we will get more then one maybe two kisses a season. I personally don’t think they’re going to make them kiss in season two I think it might happen if we get season 3 but I would still be ok with a season 2 kiss because again it will probably be very simple and very respectful especially cause it’ll also probably be Julie’s 1st kiss. If they were to have them  make out or something that would be when I would  feel uncomfortable, but that just doesn’t seem like Kenny’s vibe. He’s worked with a lot of young actors and it’s not like they’re going to french kiss or something. Kissing is intimate of course but a small closed mouth kiss is honestly pretty innocent in my opinion especially if done correctly. So it doesn’t bother me much.

5. Finally by the time they get around to filming a season 2 or 3 Maddison will also be a bit older (17 or 18) hopefully so she will also be at an age where it will feel more comfortable for her.

So in conclusion: shipping Juke good, shipping Maddy & Charlie bad and wanting Juke to kiss is acceptable so long as they do it appropriately which from what I’ve seen of the cast and the crew I believe they would. I personally have a lot of faith in the creators of this show it’s clearly a very healthy supportive environment and I trust that they know what they are doing. 

Again these are my personal opinions but I felt like some people weren’t really looking at it from a completely logical standpoint but more of an emotional one which is understandable because its a very serious subject matter and it could very well also be a trigger for many people who’ve gone through something similar. I just needed to get all that off my chest cause this kind of thing can breed negativity in fandoms and thats why I don’t participate in them anymore. and listen if this was a different show with a different cast and crew and creator and they had a 16 year old and a 22 year old kissing I would probably find it more unsettling but I think one of the reasons why we all love this show so much is BECAUSE it is so healthy and because the cast are so involved and vocal about the show. I have no doubt in my mind that Maddison would have the space to speak up if she was uncomfortable and I have no doubt in my mind that Kenny and her family would make sure she was safe.

So anyways thanks for coming to my ted talk and please if you disagree that’s totally ok just don’t be hateful, I’m happy to have discussions but I won’t tolerate rudeness cause at the end of the day it’s a show and it’s out of our hands and I’m not saying you have to agree with me. This is just how I feel about these issues. 

Ok thanks bye <3

[westernchords]

2020: a replay & reflection

so... here we are at the near end of a very long, unsettling & strange year. and at this particular moment in time, spotify has released its 2020 wrapped feature, an annual highlight for gay people everywhere (self VERY included). since the world is very large & this is a personal blog with a limited scope, i'll talk about what i know best: the view from my corner of the musical world.

i only had two songs in common with any previous year -- i wish i missed my ex by mahalia & sugar by brockhampton (... i know, the heartache is loud already,)

4 unique rain asmr audios made it into my top 15 (they help me sleep lolol)

show tunes was my #4 most listened to genre and yet not a single one made it into my top 100. (i'm pretty sure it was all of my late night waitress sing alongs)

i discovered 1,012 new artists and 162 new genres

all very fun and interesting things! however, in looking at this year, there are two things to discuss that are most important: the amount of time i spent listening to music (111,989 minutes) and my top song, fake mona lisa. let's discuss both.

on time: in short, music means a lot to me. in long, i mean that music has been central to my life for as long as i can remember. i think of my church choir and my mother singing eartha kitt and corrine bailey rae in the kitchen, my father's surprise talents at piano when he would play in chapel, and how i like to make up little ditties to sing for my dog or while i cook or to solely entertain myself. if one was to take a look at my journals, each entry is annotated with the song i was listening to or suited my mood at the time i was writing. at any moment, i am capable of revisiting the emotional landscape of old memories all set to the very soundtrack that holds that particular past closest.

i still remember plucking violin strings at 5, how i used to stack music books so i could sit up straight on my piano bench because i was too short at 7, picking up woodwinds in highschool and letting my best friend act as conductor, and now, singing endlessly- day in and day out, because it makes me feel like i am traveling home. i think of creole folk songs that connect me to my family, my diaspora. i remember the favorite songs and artists of people i don't know anymore, but still. it stays with me. my friend cj says i have a great emotional sensitivity to music, but more so, music simply connects to every cornerstone of who i am. the creation of it, the listening, the love of it. the constancy.

music is integral to my daily routine and life. since i was 13, maybe younger, i have always believed that the first song i hear in a day sets the tone so i always try to play something i love and makes me feel joyful to start off on the right foot. i will do this my entire life. every day is permeated by sound and the data shows it. 111,989 minutes is almost 3 months straight. this doesn't even count soundcloud listens or youtube tracks or music i play on my own. this felt fitting. music, this year in particular, has been a salve to both new and old hurt. and maybe i am picking at my scabs, but 2020 has amplified so much anger and shame and fear and despite that, there is so much joy in art. music is a balm for the world, it is poetry in its own right.

on fake mona lisa: so .. i am kind of obsessed with this song. fifteen hours worth of listening, i text my friends i'll join the video call soon - i just need one more replay, i got high and played this song while lying in the middle of a meadow and experienced more emotions than i had had in a very long time, my friends lovingly tease me about it so it's sort of like a character trait now, kind of obsessed. my turning to this song was the sort of romance that i didn't anticipate, but fell very hard into and, if you know me, you know that's my favorite kind. let's get into why: when dedicated side b came out, i was heartbroken. there's really no other way to put it. i was alone, back in my childhood bedroom, and harboring a reopened wound from past relationships that maybe had never closed in the first place. i was in this strange, melancholic knee-deep-in-emotions place & if you're an avid CRJ fan, you recognize that's a place she knows and sings about well.

as a song, fake mona lisa tends to be one of carly's more lyrically opaque tracks. which is fine, i'm a storyteller at heart, i'll craft my own narrative. (and honestly, there wasn't much legwork here.) without doing a full blown analysis, here are pieces that i find important to note about the song lyrically and resonate most with me -- big or small.

(transcription at bottom)

what i'm basically saying is that this song is about risk and young love and sex. its about secrets, cheap thrills, fast & easy desires, and the fantastical euphoria of a dead-end-but-still-fun “we're young so what's the matter,“ relationship. (very reminiscent of LA hallucinations, imo) and to me, someone who has been in and out of this same subset of emotional affairs, fake mona lisa stuck with me. vegas is a city of high risk, high reward- where else to chase that superficial, unattainable someone? more so, the song gives you the understanding that the relationship doesn't last, but that was not what carly ever truly wanted out of it. fake mona lisa is, at its core, about over indulgence in pleasure as a stand in for actual love + commitment, something i am oft to do myself & only did more of after dedicated side b dropped. i latched onto the slow and simmering exposition into glittery pre-chorus, starlit imagery, shiny-faraway vocals, and frankly, there was no competition for my song of the year. the song is a dream. i love it and i know what that says about me, but i stand by it. 

dedicated side b, especially fake mona lisa, carried me through the healing process of heartbreaks that crystallized into many other things- indulgence, desire, risk, short lived romances, secrets, joy, kisses i should've kept to myself, spontaneous dance breaks, tears, etc., it is an album about love, recovery, and returning to the self. fake mona lisa is just my favorite stop on a long train ride to an okay-ness with aspects of romance (both with the self and others) that i am still figuring out the messy, rose-tinted, contours of.

and sonically? i just adore the key of d minor.

as a last touch point, fake mona lisa was only the tip of the iceberg of songs  i obsessed over about not-exactly-ideal romances. again and again and again, heartbreak anthems appeared in my top 100, a deviation from my typical warmth towards romantic sentiments that appeared in past years. instead, there is a sense of love-at-a-distance, a painting yourself as the object of desire, a severed attachment, a not wanting to commit at all (see let's be friends, heartbeat, want you in my room, all by crj ... all appearing on the list.) however, much of what appeared celebrated love and having tremendous, special, struck by cupid, feelings. it's all there. what i'm saying is that carly rae jepsen writes music for lovestruck people- both lucky and not so much, hopeless or hopeful -- you name it. she writes about how you can fall in love with almost anyone, soundtracks for the highs of the first throes of intimacy, the first (and last) kiss, the shared moments between two people when they are each other's whole world, and the palpable distance of heartache, separation, and the landscape between. 

she writes as though she is both eros and psyche, armed with arrows of cascading melodies, tipped with a salve for suppressing+healing+amplifying heartbreak, and lyrics so intimate and dreamy, you really can't help but believe in love with the way she speaks of it. love is a venture from shame, a fantasy that is more real than anything else, tender and kind, pleasurable, and escapable into. the world is better in it, the world is better because of it. in carly rae jepsen's discography, love is the defining pillar of experience. a northern star and guiding principle. it is the only thing, no matter what form. & frankly? i cant help but agree.

as a final note, in hanif wills-abdurraqib's emotion review for MTV, carly rae jepsen's public displays of affection, he says this:

thats all for now. bye 2020.

- august

///

transcription of my notes:

verse 1:

city/star light imagery

i am known for wearing a star stamp on my cheek

infatuation & attraction

paints a photo of a starlet and her lover, a fair weather affair

pre-chorus:

always waiting fro a chance the object of desire

a high from love, addictive pleasures

chorus:

sex & art & risk taking (art synonymous with beauty. + seduction)

she knows she cant handle this in a real way, but wants it

desire vs/& (in conjunction with) pain

verse 2:

an idealistic worldview, hoping for the best, always somewhere else not present. 

dreamy lyrics + dreamy state of mind, cloudy even.

specifically the words fake mona lisa:

contrast, beautiful yet fully acknowledged to be unreal/superficial

a stand in for “real art“ aka “real love“

[bringing-myself-joy]

@piakichu​ I wanted to respond to your response in a fresh post because we started to move away from the topic the op brought up.  (For anyone who wishes to read that it is here. It’s just too much to simply summarize.)

Thats definitely true as well. I myself had a big advantage because growing up I always had access to my parent’s healthcare which is pretty good especially when compared to the way other companies treat mental health. And on top of that, I live in NJ so forced conversion therapy was never really a fear for me even with the worse therapists I encountered.

Right now the practice I go to is awesome in lots of different ways. When I started paying for my own bills they were supper helpful and even gave me some pro bono sessions when I had lost my job last year. It’s also one of the more diverse practices I’ve been to, not only with their general staff but with the therapists themselves. And it is absolutely an outlier in the category of mental health care. If I did an exact headcount, the majority of the staff would still probably be white because even if this place was perfect* the overall system is fucked in a way that ends with the majority of its members being white. And when I say majority I mean almost 90%, and each year this trend continues  with the new members entering the work force.

So even if the therapist themselves is queer, a white queer person still will never have experiences the same as say a black queer person. And that makes it much harder for the therapy to give that person any benefits at all. The therapist in this example still has all the experiences and biases that come with white privilege making it hard for them to truly understand or sympathize with their client. The client will likely have a difficult time discussing most issues (even if a level of trust is eventually established) because it will always require another level of explanation than it would if their therapist was also black.

And honestly, even and explanation is not good enough. Its likely impossible for a person of color to get the same benefits of therapy that a white person does as long as PoC don’t have the option to pick a doctor who is a PoC as well.

I as a white person will never understand the fear that a black person has to experience while just existing. A few words cannot undo the imbalance of societal power, and no level of imagining will make me able to understand the effects that has on one’s mental health. So how could I possibly give a client the treatment they deserve if I can’t relate to them in that way? 

It’s not the same as a therapist treating an abuse victim when they themselves haven’t been abused. If you aren't white in this country your life is fundamentally different than the one the white therapist has had. And this isn’t something that can be taught either, because we’ve already tried that. Cultural sensitivity and general awareness are part of the schooling to become a mental health practitioner, it just doesn't make enough of a difference to be an acceptable solution. Its been shown that white counselors are less likely to actually use these practices than ethnic minority counselors, even when their personal client base is at least 20% made up of PoC.  

So what is really needed for improvement is (as with most things in the us right  now) is a redesign of the whole system, to allow PoC the same opportunities as white people in the mental healthcare field. And to do that we (white people) have to do our part to be better. Which brings me to the current BLM movement. 

I wanted to post this on my mental health blog because white people, even ones who are part of other marginalized groups, have the privilege of getting to being unaware of these kinds of things. And if they are made aware, they have the privilege of forgetting about it, which its not something a PoC gets to do. So, for my followers who are white, please do not forget about this. We can’t allow privilege to blind us to the shit happening around us. Protests have been making a huge difference, we have to keep the movement and the story going even as the news finds other topics to focus on. If you can’t protest, donate. If you can’t donate, share resources and be vocal about your support of our siblings of color. Listen to the voices of color around you. 

I know people with mental health issues have a lot of our own personal struggles, but they do not prevent us from helping. There is always something we can do. If you get overwhelmed easily, start small. Pick one thing to focus on, one charity and donate what you can or share it with those around you who can. Or pick a gofundme for a trans PoC or other lgbtq* person trying to reach a donation goal for surgery or safe housing etc.

In addition to this, check on your black friends. Remind you love them and will fight to keep them safe. Call out other white people who use being part of a marginalized community as an excuse not to care or try to help. Black lives must always matter.

Notes/Citations

*I’m sure it has its faults despite all the praise I’m giving it rn, because it doesn't exist in a bubble

**above link takes you to chart showing the diversity of the psychological work force from the American Psychology Association.

***click the above link to be taken to the 2014 article - “Therapist Ethnicity and Treatment Orientation Differences in Multicultural Counseling Competencies” - from us national library of medicine. Def worth giving a read if you have the time.

[ac3has6l00d]

Shit my band director has said

I have been keeping track of a bunch of the funny shit my Band Director has been saying to us since like, halfway though the school year-last year. Here is what I have so far. If it is in reference to a person, I will put their instrument and if It's a song I'll put the song (if I remember it). He is referred to as Barr (an ironic last name). Also don't clock me for spelling I'm not meant to have my phone out during band and yet here we are.

-Highlighter of a thousand suns

-YESSS, Cole (a french horn player) no, BUT YESSSSS

-Dee dee, I'm part of a drum set

-He dead, but a surprise ending

-Haha, I am the sailor, you fell in love with

-Santas Depressed (Minor Alterations)

-Though the woodwinds I heard the buuuRR

-It's the best of all possible worlds, and then they get invaded (Candid Suit)

-harcan back to the yesterday of your, when we had counting issues

-horns, a little more, yes, I am sure

-let it ring

-no, no *disgusted face* no

-do it again!

-can I hit you with some scary knowledge

-this is good enough, thanks, this is never wrong (talking about Dr. Beat)

-the raseing of the prevorial oooohs

-goodjob Joel (a trumpet player), you rythemmaster you

-i can say this because I am one and I'm raising a girl, but boys are weird

-Alright, Angelic fruity boy (in reference to a trumpet player)

-Horns... the heroes instrument

-i actually didn't hear you at all

-did they take your triangle?

-Right notes are also important

- Teacups? It's a small world? *Ian (a french horn player)- Mt. Everest* You got sasquatch on the brain?

-morse code people

-a shade under the tempo

-woofie woofie woofie all the way around

-That isn't our Forté in the horn section to play lightly (He played french horn)

-can I get a rallintado amen

-tess (flut/piccolo player), Jordan (percussionist) - Jordan tess, Piccolo tambourine, - tambourine Piccolo

- we have plenty loud in this piece, enjoy the soft

-thats when they get invaded (Candid Suit)

-thanks trumpets... yah yeah yeahh

-flute hanger-oner

-Bold, Underlined, and in all caps

-music land

- *impersonates Kristin chenoweth* (Candid Suit)

- coming in from the basement

-were you trying to roast me? i will defend myself

-all a Twitter about arby's or something I dunno

-that was also a bold, all caps email

-unicon has a limp

-where have you been all my tambourine life

-can we agree on right notes then?

-melody melody melody, finnaly finnaly finnaly (trombones getting the melody)

-slip the surely bonds of earth

-ah please, decapitate all the invaders

-good for you... breaking norms

-christmas arrived early for you but not for anybody else

-ill write you an invitation next time

- but shut up

-stare out the window

-you may be alright young man

-seniors is theirs enough of an amen? (Chosing to Play Angel's in the Arcatectur by Frank ticheli)

-if I see that guy in a dark allyway...  I'll play him a recording of Angel's in the arcatectur (To they Guy that gave us a bad score on our MPA)

-whah whah what is like a bad joke on the trombone

-gone fishing be back in a hour 

-im just music roasting you

-i dont like this key HAAAAAAHHHH

-empty that spit

- everyone is still standing, so that's good

- im monolouging, you get that input later

- that's a really anticlimactic chord trumpets

-three f's. And your all thinking rainbows and unicorns

-Joels (a trumpet player) paying attention

- twirling the wherlys (tubes at the beginning and end of AitA)

-i dont mess with my post-its

-dropped mute isn't apart of my score

-i wanna see fire coming from your nostrils... like GOT IT

- it's muddy but we're getting there

-alive and well

-i would expect guys from he middle school band .... that's the only roast I have

-rob (a percussionist), we need to do spinning practice

-the devils intervals

-we can end on an amen

-it's like a great dane with crippling anxiety, its scared of everything. So what do you do, you put it on a treadmill and start popping balloons around it... this is training

-if I cant trust you then give it back to me.

-it's about me not you, me not you.

-for trombones, not toilets

-im going to let the trombones use their new toys (some trombones got plunger mutes (I was not one if them, Bass trombone life, bro))

-like... poof

-the devil in band

- satan himself... in the form of your phone

-welcome to band

-it's kinda hard, if you havent noticed.

-please hold for your next representative

- you are playing the elevator muzak version

-some of you are counting... and some of you play the alto. Sax (actual shade ngl)

-the best bond song from one of the stupidest bond movie (this nerd had us playing James Bond music at the end of the school year)

-jordan, finally, a use for your whistling.

-the first thing ella (his daughter) said to me, was flower

-impeckable german

-im going to save you all from this and mute it

- for those of you unitallans

- they chuck 'em

- bread and butter band keys

-there is no humor in marching band

- the fads you kids are into these days.

- our boiiis

- instrament of mass destruction

-ahoy mates

-is there a pre malone

-the newest version of mac... high Ciara (a chick in my Music Production Class)

-your in your pre stages

-thats a great beat son

-were on a bus my child

-if you don't music speak

-where is the beat, I am trying to adjust accordingly

-Ich Bin confused

- if you use the word angelic I will come back there (One of the Horns said it as a joke)

-it's like the piccolo of the percussion section

-mr. Barr is now in his office

-boys, why and no

-why are you whistling Hawaii 5.0?

- yeah, I need a highhat to subdivide too

-we got new old bessy back there (about the new bass drum frame since the old frame broke during the MB season)

-oh I've used dumpsterfire, I've seen quite a few in my day

-dumpsterfire? (I used it and he picked up on it)

-you went even alive, why am I telling you?

-do I sound hip?

-thats the right answer

-if I don't do that to yours, it doesn't mean you are not a great person

-you found 8th position (I'm pretty sure this was him talking to me about bass trombone stuff)

-i see what I did there

- don't get old, you wake up and then you can't feel your leg.

-the sparks were there but it's not raging yet

-long live the king

-i will brb

-thats annoying

-its quitten time y'all

-Barb Peterson (Our lovely Colour Gaurd instucter) Hotline

- please escort this out, I hate it

- is Seth's (Clarinet and Pit) head one of those two way mirrors?

-that's incredable seth

-should I not make spinal tap references?

-nevermind a reference I will put away for this class.

-i now live in fear of that.

-this is bumpen

-im having some real memory issues.

-death star trench run

-think the towel, be the towel

-dont poke the barr

-my wife watches garbage tv when I'm not there

-the most dramatic little people show

-soundtrack, moving on

-twiggles (there is a teacher with the last name of Twig)

-saf to say

-i like you, but not that much

-im going to give you the confused dog look

-this is not open roast time

-zing

-i love how it creeped into your subconscious

-nooooohhoo

-what a quick roast of me annie (a very, very, very good clarinetist)

-it's like the end of the commercial where they add all the legal stuff.

- the flex tape tape

-am I going to have to sound really aloof and do commercials

-i love how you are all responsive

-let me finish!

-don't juule

-i have my box o' toys (MTP we were recording sounds for a project so he pulled out a bunch of percussion stuff)

- if i squint I can hear the right thing

-I feel like hot garbage

-if only we lived in the information age

-were hitting the gym annie... I don't know what that means

-the gong is in the room

-i blew up the death star

-25% of people who conduct this come down with this crazy illness

-your like the studio aduiance for like QVC, "what do you do?" "SCRATCH IT OUT!"

-i dont understand your generation

-youve poisoned me. I hope you are happy

-weight not wait

-oh wow

-shut up

-you just lead your sled into a ditch (Midnight sleighride)

-i love his vocal signature, like "I did this song and I'm jason derulo"

-the power of pan

-wait, what's tic-toc

-shut it

-its like a hippo with Ballarina shoes on

-it's thick with a whole bunch of K

-im trying to throw him a gong bone

-Trombasusaphoneabone

Yeah I have no clue if he knows he is saying that stuff