#thats enough fuckery for today

[onelostmoth]

i felt this so im shoving it at you ppl lmao

[sordid-dog]

[aire101]

[asphaltvalkyrie]

I had an extremely slow day at work today, so I chose to look busy by writing about BG3. Someone smarter than me has probably had this revelation before, but it gave me pause enough for me to feel like I need to share it.

I decided to romance Gale in my 2nd playthrough, with the intent of letting him get ahold of the Crown of Karsus, and its making me Feel Things.  I like this walking apocalypse of a wizard a lot (he and Karlach are my easy faves,) but its taken romancing him to really see that

tl;dr Gale's backstory really makes a handy allegory for gifted kid burnout.

From the beginning he was special, a golden child, someone who would do great things and go far. So, he ended up building his entire personality on that eventuality.  Older authority figures took a special interest in his talent and he immediately wanted nothing more than to please them, at the cost of making friends or learning life skills (well, except cooking apparently?) 

(Then there's the whole issue of him developing a sexual relationship with Mystra who was without a doubt considerably older than he was and had that "but he's so mature for his age," mindset and all the fuckery that comes with that holy shit I can't even begin to desconstruct how much that would fuck someone up.)

Then he makes a mistake. He breaks a rule he didn't know existed. Why doesn't he know that rule existed?  Because no one told him.  They conflated his intelligence with maturity and his self-confidence with knowing his own limits. They forgot that he's basically a kid compared to them. (Elminster is what, centuries old?  And Mystra is a fucking deity.) He lacks the emotional maturity to understand why what he did was so bad. 

Gifted kids know.  Among the absolute worst thing an adult can say to you is "I expected more of you," or "you should have known better." Which is pretty much what Elminster and Mystra said to him. And then they not only withdrew their attentions and support, but they also refused  to help him deal with the orb - an omnipresent physical and spiritual reminder of his trangression. After that... he just has no idea what to do with himself. He sits in his wizard tower until the Mind Flayers get him.

By the time the others find him, he's realized that the talent he used to get by on no longer serves him, but since he built his whole personality around it, he doesn't know how else to act.  So he maintains the bluff and bluster of a child prodigy, but he's now keenly aware of how pointless it is. He seems insufferably arrogant at times, but there's a razor-fine edge of self-loathing to that arrogance that he couches in self-aware humor. Over the course of his short time with the party he starts to feel like he's cared for and among friends, and even proves himself an attentive, affectionate and very grateful partner if you romance him.

Then Elminster shows up and tells him to atone for what he did by suicide bombing the Elder Brain. Bam, there goes his hope of finding a life outside of that "greatness" others told him he was destined for.  Once a gifted kid always a gifted kid.  Destined to be a human sacrifice on the altar of someone else's expectations, for good or ill. 

And in a semi-related note, when you take him through the Dryad's trial, the answer to the question "whats his biggest flaw" is that "he thinks the world would be better off with him dead" and he says that its very true, but he didn't realize it until you said it.

Then you find the Annals of Karsus, and what does he say he wants to do with it? Reforge the Crown of Karsus with it so that he can obtain godlike power and make the world better for mortals, and he wants to share it with you.  With how smart he is, he really should know thats a terrible idea. But he doesn't, because of a combination of hubris and naivete.  He learned absolutely zero lessons from the orb debacle because he hasn't really been allowed to learn any lessons beyond "I just have to do the thing I'm good at, only I have to try harder this time."

I'm only on the second netherstone, but I have a feeling that this is going to end very badly.

[6of575]

my goal is to try and make at least a post a day on here, even if its nothin very interesting to anybody else

i feel like,,, if i can finally successfully make it a habit to post and engage, it might just trick my brain from task avoidance

so! post done and heres the part for me thats fun:

(under a cut since its ramblin long)

the books im currently reading concurrently are some conlang construct books mr am got me that have been on my wishlist for ages, along with a very cool book about black holes and theories surrounding them, which mr am loaned to me from his collection

one of the things we share is a love of science and space, and more specifically, stars and time travel and all the things about our known universe that black holes straight up break

i have a lot of fun chatting with him; i really cant overstate the value of a friend so genuine, who i am never too much of, and i can talk about all my interests without the reflexive dread creeping on in

all that bullshit i learned growing up, yanno the kind: "im boring, im dumb, who could possibly enjoy swapping rock facts, much less listen to hours of it even when it our interests DONT align"

like, theres so much else about my friendship with him thats meaningful, but thats top tier right there

and lately? ive gotten a few others in my corner, who when i share, im starting to feel like that with them, too

its so weird! to have gone from one person to a tiny community of folks (and i mean little! its like,, five? six? of us max usually) that thrive on a love of the weird and the cringe and the stubborn hope

plenny others have waxed more eloquent than me about this sorta thing--how fandom spaces come sorta pre-fab with common, shared interests that its fans bring, and they build their fort and theres rules already laid out, and it becomes a second (sometimes first) home, of sorts

but when its starting from scratch, when its about stuff and is made by people that others just wouldnt ordinarily invest in or look at without outside prompting, thats not the same! its not a bad thing, more neutral, but its stressful, its really such a lonely feeling

except--when you finally find it, that person, and thats a community of its own, and it can grow, and suddenly you swappin stories, throwing jokes! and memes and links and hey inevitably, theres also those what ifs about your little guys

and everything is srs and sacred and everything is hilarious and "i cant believe this is real life" levels of stupid

you get to learn habits and quirks and whole personalities

"hey this reminded me of you" "hey, check out this view" "oh, thats right, yer the possum dude" "you love medieval lore--and i read this, and what do you think about it, too"

its suddenly kind of a fandom space after all, and its like, still work of course, reaching for and keeping more and being a person with, it aint that neat or pretty

but its got warmth and joy and expansion, after a lifetime of making yourself small enough to try and fit

you end up fans of your friends, fans of their life, hyping each other up and up and up about the most mundane shit and it starts to look like not even the skys the limit

planning things to do together, spending long hours into the night to parallel play with vidgames or watchin movies like time aint nothin thisll last forever, right? (it doesnt, always, but thats also part of this, and the ones that stay, the ones that work with you

those are the ones waking up to backread your chats like its the morning newspaper

and your life matters

like its better than the best hot goss, its saturday morning cartoons and their favour ice cream flavours

only now we adults and its also commiseratin over breakups and bills, and cross-country moves, and its celebrating that i saw chickens in the yard today and you finally got your boygirlthemsomethin gender fuckery juice)

idk idk idk

i feel some kinda way about all that

i never thought id make it so far that im nearly forty

never thought id get to ask "okay, well, now what? what do i wanna do, and try, and be?"

im... starting small i think, and im for reals happy, happier than i have been in years; i learned how to be alla my friends biggest fans, and im starting to finally believe

other people can feel that way about me

i just really think thats kinda neat

[alex-washington-rackets]

The hunt for coffee

TAGGING ➝ Alex Washington, Bree Brown @blckbarbree

LOCATION ➝ PSU Cafateria

TIME FRAME ➝ 10/17 afternoon.

WARNINGS ➝ None.

SUMMARY ➝ Alex and Bree get to know eachother

Bree Brown

[follows him to coffee] So the rest of the questions, I am from LA so been here like my whole life, I am a mathematics doctoral student and a TA for Professor Delilah Rose, my favorite color is pink unless it's purple and I have no red flags, unless you count being damn near flawless a red flag.

Alex Washington

[whilst on the hunt for coffe at bree's admission Alex stops in shock] Your a mathematics doctora student [he repeats] What! So your like really cleaver! Should i be calling you Dr Bree? [Continuing on the hunt for caffeine] Honey i am obsessed with your confidence! These are the kinds of vibes i love. So what about your ex's? Is there anyone here? Spill the tea!

Bree Brown

Clever is certainly a word I would use to describe me, and not yet. I still have about two years left in my program and then Dr. Bree Brown PhD has a very nice ring to it. [smiles just thinking about it] Shockingly, I don't hate your whole thing either. Which, actually means something because most people exhaust me beyond belief. Well, he's not really my ex anymore, don't know if you saw the handsome man in the corner hunched over a phone, but that one is mine, Jake Puckerman.

Alex Washington

As you should! And i bet your gonna boss the next two years too. [Finally finding the coffee Alex sorts them out with some] Im gonna call you Dr Bree. It fits. [Sending her a wink] You know ive made a lot of wins today but winning your favour has got to be the top. How on earth are you surviving here with so many people if they exhaust you? [Alex asks in wonder] i mean i dont mind people but ive beem going stir crazy the last few days being cooped up inside. You mean to tell me that that all drink of water brooding in the courner is your man! Honey hes beautiful! well done! [Offering Bree a high five]

Bree Brown

[has never been more excited to see coffee in her entire life] You can literally call me whatever you want now that you've found coffee. Although, I do like Dr. Bree, so that definitely has my stamp of approval. [quite frankly, she's lapping up this attention and it's feeding her soul] Oh, no, don't let the demeanor fool you, I am absolutely fourteen minutes away from chewing my way out of here, but I am trained not to o such things or indicate in any way with my body language that I feel anything less than perfect. [might have just realized it isn't people that exhaust her but rather the fact she has to put on a front every time she's around others, damn] I figured if I was going to be with a man I might as well be with one that looks good enough to compensate for the male fuckery I am sure to endure. And believe me, I have endured.

Alex Washington

[Alex laughed at her admission] Thats fair. I've always been of the mind of if you cant beat them join them. Its always kept me safe. But even i can admit that that can get pretty draining. I can totally see you knoring your way out with your sharp mouth. [Alex smiled at the crazy image. He admired Bree for her confidence. It was refeshing to meet someone who just told it like it was] Oh Dr Bree how did you train yourself to be perfect. I am anything but no amtter how hard i try. I will never be enough for my mother. [He thought ruefully on the amount of effort he had dedicated his life to his mothers approval.] Oh believe me women can casue just as much fuckery! I'm sorry to hear youve had to endure so much.

[elfyourmother]

ffs no rebagles but @ everyone still smugly posting lukewarm “lol wardens don’t get involved in politics so why did we get involved in the landsmeet” takes in 2018:

eamon guerrin’s ulterior motives don’t change the fact that loghain’s regency was actively impeding the wardens’ ability to carry out their primary mission, ending the damn blight by 1) preventing the Orlesian Wardens from coming over the border to fight and 2) actively trying to capture/kill the only two Fereldan Wardens left alive

just like we had to get involved in dwarven politics in order to get the dwarven military support we needed to fight the darkspawn army

just like we had to get involved in chantry politics when the circle was all fucked up so we could get mage or templar military support to fight the darkspawn army

“wardens don’t get involved in politics” where tf do you think those treaties came from? do you know what a treaty is?

ending blights is the primary objective and duty of the grey wardens. it’s literally why the order was founded. “wardens don’t get involved in politics” is something they tell political leaders to keep them out of their business so they can do that work. they generally try to keep to it if for no other reason than it serves their own self-interest, keeping the trust of temporal powers so as to continue to have the right of conscription honored

but if said powers that be are dithering about or actively interfering w the wardens’ ability to fight a blight the way loghain’s happy ass was they can and will do end runs around them (it happened in the 4th one) or failing that, get them the fuck out of the way because, again, the very raison d’être of the grey wardens is to end blights, not to stay politically neutral at all times lmao fuck

also the idea that Duncan of all fucking people would somehow be proud of an idiot Warden recruit who refused to get rid of an impediment to fighting the darkspawn bc it was technically against a rule—Duncan, who became Warden-Commander of Ferelden thru basically mutiny, helped King Maric hide his bastard child and cover the lie just ‘cause, and is 100% cool w the use of blood magic to fight darkspawn among other “the ends justify the means” tactics—is really goddamn hysterical

[liyawritesss]

Having Aizawa As A Dad Would Include...

Genre: fluff

Synopsis: dadzawa!!! Because we can never get enough of him

Warnings: cursing I think?

First of all if your aizawas kid whether by blood or not, best believe you are one badass mf cuz Aizawa don't raise pussies in this household.

Right off the bat doesn't want you going to UA bc let's be honest he views it as bullshit fuckery, but if its what you set your mind on, he makes sure you have the best possible educational environment

Which means pulling strings to have you in his class, which he doesn't have to do much of since you've got the skills and qualifications to be in 1A.

Personally oversees your training, whether it be for upcoming exams or just in general. Even though he's your father, he's also your harshest critic, and both of you know that you can't grow without blunt honesty abt your skills.

If he's 1A's dad you're definitely the big sister. You help everyone in class with anything they need - homework, training, personal problems, etc - which in turn drains you, and that's where Dadzawa comes in

If he sees you've pushed yourself an unhealthy amount, he'll force you to take a chill pill and send you to your room. Will order your favorite takeout and eat with you while talking about the most random things, so long as it helps you replenish yourself

May not say it out loud but he is so so so proud of you and the young woman you're becoming.

Has a picture of you he keeps with him always, and when he has down time on patrol he'll call and check up on you if you're still up.

He's generally a chill dad, not one to be in your business unless its for health reasons, and let's you do what you want within reason.

Although he does have to deal with Mic constantly pestering him about you

"Hows are baby girl doing Shouta?"

"Please let me sleep, Mic."

You'll keep him company in the teacher's lounge, helping him grade papers and come up with lesson plans in your free time

Youre the one thats reminding Aizawa to eat and drink throughout the day, if not verbally, by leaving g snacks where you know he'll find it.

"We've got training today, you can't observe on an empty stomach. We don't need you passing out on us if Midoriya breaks an arm today."

He secretly snickers when you throw shade at your other classmates, whether it be a joke or seriously.

He has to "scold" you afterwards or else people will start saying he's showing favoritism towards his daughter, and he can't have that

But let's be honest he would if he could

I been meaning to write something Dadzawa for a while now and I finally got to do it thanks to @todorkihoe giving me the motivation to. Hope this warms up some of you who've had a bad day today!

If you enjoyed, please leave a like, comment, and reblog for others to see! And don't be shy to send a request!

[the-kipsabian]

I died today 💔njpw really said fuck you to us today 😩idk about anyone else but I hate it. I hate that Ace joined the stupid bullet club. I hate it so much. There was total bullshit and unnecessary at all. At this rate why don't nj should just add their whole roster to the Bullet Club 😠😠to think we just discussing Alex and Ace and then this FUCKERY happened

this sums pretty perfectly how i feel tbh

like i dont get it why this was a thing that needed to happen. if it was someone else, someone smaller than ace its like yeah okay more airtime like they did with bey. then i would get it

but they have no reason to make ace join the club apart from the shock factor of him turning his back to fans and alex. thats literally the only reason i can think of, and while yeah okay it fits bullet club, it doesnt make sense. like i cant stress enough how nonsensical this move is from anyones behalf. like this is the "jay removing g.o.d from bullet club" levels of nonsensical and that just wasnt good to begin with

the ace/alex part hurts the most tbh, but i also think this is the part we need to get him in slammiversary now - not for aces aid, but to kick his ass. i need this revenge story now and they better give it to me or else. i was just also thinking about it how we had totally different plans earlier and well. now we're here

im just. i cannot believe

[shoezuki]

Do u understand the new dream drama??? I am confusion

Whoop sorry i been doin fuckery n hw All day n like. I still aint able to get on my computer rn but im gon give u a tldr without sources because lazee

I know Practically all a it beyond maybe like. Exact time frames n shit. So ill give u the runnerup to all this

John swan is a commentary youtuber w like. A devent following. I think around 200k? He definitely had 'fans' n an audience for all this n crap

At some point i believe a year ago (idk exactly How Long ago but john swan had like 6k subs on yt) dream n john swan Converged and knew each other. Whether they were friends or not im unsure. But thats not exactly relevant

But essentially john swan on discord made his account out to look like dream and messaged at LEAST one person pretending to be dream, saying slurs like the n word, horrible shit, n something about coding a 'sex mod' ??? Pointing that one out specifically cuz it has become a whole goof

This person Relayed this info to dream who confronted john swan about it. John swan essentially said 'i havent been on discord in a few days. My discord login info was on a family friends computer and a 12 yo i know did all that'

This kinda like. I dont think anything happened While it was jus happening. But at some point a bit over a week ago now, dream made a reddit post saying such about john swan, that he was 'a suspicious guy' and such things on a smaller subreddit. John swan himself screenshotted it and brought it up on twitter that dream 'has a large audience' and defamation of his character can do a Lot of damage to him, and that he was lying

Imma speedrun this cuz its gotten to kinda like. Jus twitter beef. Its essentially 'im not lying YOURE lying' between john swan n dream on twitter. There was some drama alert shit, dream's whole 'detective' stream, john swan made some 18 page length Thing i couldnt be bothered to read.

Dream's arguments the whole time like. Objectively were better and jus more understandable. Made more sense. Although some things Couldve been poked through if john swan replied well enough. For instance one point dream made about it Absolutely being john swan was that the messages sent by this '12 year old' used similar speech patterns n terminology. Which Cam be solid evidence but for some fuckin reason all ppl w followings on twitter type n text like they eat cardboard in their free time like. The blandest ass shit. Whatever

BUT it came to some kind of 'end' today because apparently some Absolute no argument Evidence came out against john swan which hadnt been revealed publically as far as i seen. John swan First admitted to it in dms with friends n other commentary yters who'd made videos n shit on the whole bullshit. Dream tweeted bout it too a thread of like how 'he and the community deserve an apology' but he didnt think itd happen.

The john swan made a tweet w an apology that was essentially. 'Yeah it was me me and a friend were messing around on discord when i had a small following and i hadnt thought it was a big deal but once dream found out and confronted me i lied and continued lying im sorry'

All around its jus wack n like. Dumb as all fuck. Like yes in a 'discourse sucks' way but also in My way that this is No Fun. Like not even that juicy drama i live for. What COULD be actually important (john swan basically admitted to using the n word???) Just Doesnt get mentioned. Wack

[voidselfshipp]

DRACO THE FIRE DANCER

(Okay to rb!!!)

♤DO NOT REPOST MY ART♤

Heres my s/I to selfshipp with tenzin!

(Some suggestive stuff ahead!and anxiety mentions)

(Sidenote: this s/I is made to build up my self steem)

Jerico "Draco" Von Terra , the Fire dancer

Shes skilled in dancing(ofc) and firebending, she mixes both of them to make amazing and complicated coreographies.

Her dance moves are inspired by todays dances wich is a surprise to newcomers to her show.

Shes comfortable with her body wich leads her to use revealing clothing.

Femme fatale (ish)

Has golden marks that she hides when outside work but lets them shine when she performs.

Her dances often include suggestive dancemoves( since sex appeal sells).

Actually a sweetheart, shes a kind giving person who Will put herself before others.

Very selfconsious and suffers from anxiety, is also very self conscious of her golden marks across her arms and back, and the sun Mark in her back.

Works out to have enough strenght to lift up the rest of her crewmates.

Often searches for inspiration in other cultures and wants to make a coreography based off each bending style.

She meets tenzin in a show who was convinced to go by his brother bumi.

Tenzin wants to congratulate her on her performance and sneaks into her changing room.

"An admirer?my my...~" "I uh... I didnt want to interrupt just wanted to congratulate you...I uh..." "dont worry dear I dont bite~"

Tenzin is red of shame everytime shes around him.

And she asks him to help her with her airbending coreography.

Shes very secretive of her family a lot but she really loves them.

And about her past, she doesnt talk much about it.

Tenzin respects that but he cant help to feel something off with her.

And the ammount of power that irridiates form her.

Still,their relationshipp is very healthy! And they help eachother get out of their Shell.

"Let me see them" "my marks?" "They are like the air nomads arrows" "I dont know tenzin..." "trust me...please"

Jericos marks are sensible to the touch and Will shine brightly when touched by someone as powerful as her ( example,the descendants of the avatar).

Tenzin quickly realizes what is it about.

(warning oc stuff here)

"Youre....youre a goddess?" " I was, decided to live as a human..." "I saw you once in the spirit world...you saved me,only that you were a huge red dragon" "pft...yeah your face was prizeless"

That only strenghtens their Bond and finally jerico explains the fuckery thats going on in her family

"And I thought mine was messed up" "you havent seen how family dinners go"

Thats as much as I have of her rn!

[eurydice-thefool]

so i started playing Obey Me

or at least enough through the tutorial, because someone (*cough* @touch-starved-apprentice​ *cough*) was spamming my dash with it and I had to see it myself

Some spoiler-y thoughts under the cut

Okay so I was losing it over the fact that MC has no idea what was going on. “We thought we’d strengthen the relationship between our worlds” okay okay yeah I’ve seen halloweentown high but they at least kNEW WHERE THEY WERE GOING. THEY THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA IM. “naaah we’ll just explain it to them when they get here” WHAT.

ALSO

I HAVE TO KNOW WHAT KIND OF TROUBLE TWO RANDOM DEMON KIDS SHOWING UP AT A NORMAL-ASS HIGH SCHOOL CAUSES. I HAVE TO MEET THESE GREMLINS I HAVE TO.

I was so fuckin happy that “I have to write a paper?!?!” was a response I could use as MC this game Understood that

My dumbass forgot that Lucifer was doing some fuckery so I could have Mammon’s phone number and I was so fucking mad when I called him back and he was like. “So, what business does a human got with THE Mammon?” like asshole you called me first!

But of course I said “Let’s be friends” and he says 

Oh he’s gonna be my best friend.

ALSO HEY UH DOES THE TIME REALLY EFFECT THE GAME THAT MUCH CAUSE IF SO MY EXECUTIVE-DYSFUNCTION AFFLICTED ASS IS IN TROUBLE.

Ah and this. This is. The word association that made me absolutely lose my shit. I had to turn my phone off until I could breathe again.

I have to scroll down and stop fucking looking at it cause I’m losing my shit again.

OH AND HERE’S THE SHIT I CAME FOR! Assholes that have to work together energies. Siblings fucking with each other.

Thats the good shit.

Bitch I only just learned today that demons are real and I have to hang out at their school you’re telling me there was magic accessible to humans and nobody thought to tell me???

I haven’t met this one yet but my dumb ass thought “Catnapping” meant that he stole cats. kidnapped cats. and hid them around. like alphonse elric. then i realized he’s probably sloth and it just means he sleeps a lot.

but you know I could still be right he might do both

The glowsticks are great. they’re just powerful demonic entities and they just think glowsticks are neat. i love it.

So anyway the experience was overall good! Kinda silly but in an endearing way, well-written. I was prepared for the connections my brain would make with FMA but I was not prepared for “Gordon, I’m hungry” so I lost my shit over that for a while. It’s kinda complicated and the uh. only dating sim app i’ve played is Arcana and thats just a visual novel. So there might be a learning curve with that, I hope it doesn’t fuck my gameplay up too much.

Also might have a problem because this is a dating sim with only male LI’s and I’m a lesbian but I’m not here for the dating anyway I’m here for the sibling brainrot

[lilkittay]

what fuckery is this that i can look up at the sky and its not blue but white. because of wildfire smoke haze from the other side of the continent. and yet the air quality here is "good" low particulates. pretty darn clean. cuz thats up so so high. but it shrouds the sun.

its a fucking analogy for this fucking plague which feels just as far away as i still dont know personally a single person who has had it. the cases here keep rising and yet they claim its "controlled".

seems to me, a smouldering fire isnt controlled. put the fucking thing out.

i dont need to see political shit or social shit or racial shit. theres enough apocalyptic shit going on without goddamn idiots and their fucking idiot boat parades.

goddamn 7 year olds playing with toys in the fucking bathtub.

im enjoying the collective insanity creeping over us all. maybe i should buy more toilet paper.

OH AND MY CAT JUMPED OUT THE WINDOW TODAY.

[a-pretty-nerd]

Wild Ride (Klaus Hargreeves x fem!reader smut)

Request: "The second one is where the kinky fuckery happens. So in the 2nd idea you get to let him be true to his sub heart and dominate his ass so like tie him tf up and peg the boy bc HE WOULD BE SO FUCKING DOWN." ~ @trickkombowerskru

"Would you do a fic about pegging Klaus and then riding him after please 🤠" ~ Anonymous

Wham Bam thank you ma'am 🤘❤

A/N: Oof, so many new Klaus requests! Lets get goin'! As always, your requests and feedback mean the world guys ✌💕

Warnings: NSFW, SEX, bondage, pegging, rough sex, so on and so forth

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Klaus had a funny way of telling you he was feeling on the sub side. He would have this habbit of acting similar to a sad puppy. Sure, Klaus was always a lil sub and femme, but the sexual side always started with something very specific. For example, Klaus would often stuff his face into the crook of your neck and then proceed to plant very sweet and gentle kisses across your flesh. His hands would very slowly creep up your arms until they reached your shoulders. At this point, you would drag your hands down his chest and rest then on his hips. He loves it when you hold him by his hips. It makes him feel safe.

This night in particular, Klaus was feeling very vulnerable and needy. It started, at your desk. Where you sat and tried your best to finish some leftover work. You heard the footsteps enter your shared room, but they stopped very suddenly. You paused, and listened. When you heard nothing you asked,

"Klaus?"

"Yes, sunshine?" He cooed. He reached his hands around the chair and rested them firmly on your shoulders. He leaned forward and rested his chin on your shoulder where he kissed your cheek.

"Are you about ready for bed?" You asked. Klaus took a deep breath before he stood back up, and then took a few steps before swinging his leg around you so he sat down in your lap. Your hands instinctually sat on in hips.

"Not really." He was already half naked, nothing but a pair of briefs decorated with eccentric colors and patterns. If that wasn't distracting enough, what laid beneath was. A smile stretched across your lips as you ran your hands down his thighs, back up and then down to his ass. You groped him as you watched him from above. He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath of pleasure as you ran your fingers over his flesh.

"Is someone a little sensitive today?" You asked. Klaus nodded with a small whimper before looking back down at you with a lustfilled gaze. "Well sweetheart, it looks like you'll be keeping me away from my work."

"Oh! You and your work!" Klaus huffed like a fustrated house wife, crossing his arms over his chest.

"You know what that means, don't you?" Klaus relaxed and nodded again. You pulled him a little closer to gently kiss and nibble his neck before harshly slapping his ass. It made him jump and whimper with glee. "I'll have to punish you."

Klaus made his way to bed a little too quickly. He laid down on his back while you removed rope from the bottom drawer of the bedside table. Klaus watched you strattle him to keep him down as you leaned over to tie his wrists to the headboard of your bed. He tried to pull out of them to test it, but at this point, you had gotten too good for him to break free. Where you sat, you could already feel his bulge grow against your ass.

You pulled yourself off of him and proceeded to rumage through the bottom drawer where you kept all your toys and other dirty artifacts. Finally, you removed a bottle of lube and placed it firmly on the bedside table.

"What are you going to do?" He asked with a fake sense of fear, playing along as he loved to do. You smiled as you finished getting completely undressed. You didnt answer until you finally pulled out the belt and dildo.

"I'm gonna fuck you senseless." Klaus's eyes practically lit up. You strapped the belt and dildo onto yourself before climbing back over him on the bed. You leaned over and gave him a password and heated kiss before you sat up again. Adjusting yourself so the cock strapped to you sat at his lips. "Go on." You told him. He looked up at you with his big eyes as he licked his lips and parted them slowly. You loved how sweet and vulnerable he looked as he took in the head, and began sucking and licking. Soon, his was bobbing his head up and down, taking in as much as he could until you placed your hand st the back of his head and pressed it all the way down to the base. He made a muffled made as he stayed there for a moment, looking up at you once again. Finally you pulled it out and away, leaving a string of spit running down his chin. "Fuck, you're practically bursting out of these, aren't you?" You asked as you sat between his legs and saw his struggling boner in his underwear.

"Mmhm." He moaned. You placed a hand st the visible based and ran it across his twitching length. He let out a sharp breath as he closed his eyes. You smiled and finally pulled them off and down his legs. His cock sprung free almost enthusiastically, if you could call a dick enthusiastic. Klaus's almost always was. Especially when he was be teased and dominated. You took it in your hand and stroked it a few times before running your thumb across the tip a few times. You felt a small amount of precum leak from it.

You looked up at him, his head back against the headboard with his eyes closed, enjoying your touch. He opened them and looked down at you when you removed your hand, curiously watching you. You took the bottle of lube and poured a small amount in your hand before snaking your fingers down to his ass. Klaus's eyes trailed back up to the ceiling where he then closed them as you inserted one of your fingers inside. He gave a content moan as you began to finger him with a second. He bent his knees and spread them to give you more room.

"Ready?" You asked him. He smiled and gave a nod, his eyes still closed. You poured lube across the dildo and stroked it a few times before positioning it at his entrance. You slowly pressed in, which made his jaw drop.

"Ohhhh fuuuuuck." He gasped as you pressed further and further into him until your reached the base. You stayed still from just a moment before you started to move. Slowly thrusting in and out of him as he gave soft moans and whimpers. "Fuck, baby." He moaned and you started to move faster, harder. Finally getting into the motion as you started to fuck him. He held his legs up higher for you to get deeper, hitting his G-spot. It made his eyes roll into the back of his head as he moaned your name loudly. "Oh god, yes!" He cried as you slammed your hips into his ass. At one point reached to scratched down his thighs which made him hiss with pleasure. "Oh oh I'm gonnna- mmgh I'm gonna cum!" He cried. You pulled back quickly, pulling out of him and sitting above as you watched him groan and squirm uncomfortably.

"Not just yet, darling." You unstrapped the belt and tossed it aside on the bed. Klaus watched you with a small pout before he bit his lip and gave another satisfied moan as you pressed a buttplug into him. You the poured lube on his cock, stroking him a few times before strattling him once again. This time, sliding his cock deep inside of you as you gave a small moan of pleasure. You started bouncing on him, slowly rocking your hips on him.

"Ohhh god, thats good." He grunted as you rode him. "Thats it, fuck me" He practically shouted. You held out your hand wrapped it around his neck. He gave a small chuckle as you choked him gently. You panted and moan uncontrollably as you fucked him, rocking the mattress against the wall so it made a repeated creeking sound. You felt warmth rush over you body as you got closer and closer. Klaus started to struggle against his restraints. Normally, when you rode him he loved to hold you and feel you. But not he was unable to, and it annoyed him more than anything else.

"Oh fuck." You moaned loudly as you continued to ride him. He gazed up at you and watched you, your eyes closed, pleasure and need flowing through your veins.

"Yes baby cum, cum on my cock." He encouraged, the closer he got, the more he broke the character from foreplay. The more he just needed and wanted to release. Your jaw dropped as your orgasm washed over you, pushing Klaus closer to his as he threw his head back. He closed his eyes tightly and grit his teeth as he came shortly after you. You sat there panting for a moment, thouroughly spent. You lifted yourself off of Klaus and fell down bedside him. He huffed with a giggle.

"Mh, I needed that." You smiled.

"Me too." Klaus panted with a satisfied smile. "Say, would you mind?"

"Oh yeah." You untied him, cleaning and tossing all used items back inside the drawer before closing it, and plopping back into bed. Klaus snuggled up to you, giving you a sweet kiss.

"Mmh. You're so good to me." He cooed.

"You're good to me." You smiled back before sharing another loving kiss.

[just-some-random-blogger]

Wheel Of Fortune

EXO Park Chanyeol x Reader + others Characters: EXO Summary:  Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Chanyeol was head over heels for you but he was 100% in denial that you liked Kyungsoo. Word Count: 1k+ Warnings: CRACK FOOL. RUN IF YOURE NOT HERE FOR THAT, jealousy, bottled emotions, fluff ending, etc.

A/N: this was TOO FLUFFY tbh. i wanted to hurt myself but it turned into fluff but oh well

let’s start at the beginning

your parents were introduced by mutual friends and started talking on the phone

okay kidding that’s too far

right

so you worked at SM

and is the maknae of a seven member coed group that debut a year after BigBang and a year before SHINee

(so 2007)

which considering the fact you were younger than Sehun by a couple of months meant you debuted at 10

just roll with it cos ITZ MY VERY SPECIFIC PLOT DMMIT

wheLP

the members were all exactly one year apart and the members from eldest to youngest,, the sequence was a guy (@ 30 yrs old), a girl (29), a guy (28), a girl (27), a guy (26), a guy (25), then you (24).

I KNOW I DONT NEED THIS BUT THIS IS HOW I IMAGINED THIS PLOT IT DMMIT

ok

since you were basically a sunbae at SM even tho u were a smol child you wanted to show your support to your hoobaes

So a day before their debut as a whole group, you, along with the eldest member of your group, who was the leader, visited EXO in the dance studio and gave moral support

You were A BIG FAN and it showed

not that you were hiding it in the first place

your leader was HIGH KEY embarrassed by you, but low key thought it was kinda cute how excited you were for this song

so dUH EXO dances growl for you

anD YOU NEARLY SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUST BECAUSE OF HOW PERFECT EVERYTHING WAS

Luhan’s voice

Baekhyun’s attitude

Sehun’s resting bitch face

eeeerrrrrthing

YOU WERE ON THE FLOOR SCREAMING 

literally

and Junmyeon thought you were adOrAbLE

“I think she malfunctioned,” your leader gave a face and pushed you on the shoulder to see if you were still breathing as you let out a silent scream

“CAN YOU GUYS DO IT ONE MORE TIME”

????? 

Jongin was too out of breath to fight you

but lol u know what

they did dance again for you

BECAUSE YALL HAD THE CUTEST LIL FACE AND YOU WERE LIKE 16 SO

after that your band and exo were pretty much in one group 

like hella tight 

you were bsicly conjoined twinss

You could be at an award show and your table would be abandoned because you decided to sit with exo or vice versa

HYPING EACH OTHER WAS NOT EVEN HYPE ANYMORE BECAUSE IT WAS LIKE YOU GUYS WERE RABID OR SOMETHING WTF 

!!!!CALM!!!!!DOWN!!!!

like you + your group to them:

“thtAS MY CHILd!”

“DID YOU SEE YIXING AND HIS HIPS FUCK YOU BITCH!”

“HE WAS RUDE. THAT WAS RUDE. THAT’S NOT ALLOWED”

“GET OFF THE STAGE SLUT”

��WWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP BITCH!”

“~~~that was sooooooo sOFYT”

“CHEN STFU! YOU NEED TO STOP USING THAT DAMN VOICE OF YOURS JONGDAE. THATS ILLEEEEEGAL!”

“myY HERT!”

“OPPA *cries in korean* PLESS!”

“WHAT IS THIS FUCKERY!!!!!?“

‘iN fRonT oF MY sALaD”

“PA$$ THE H01Y W4T3R”

“NO KAI. BAD KAI. STTOOOOPPPP.”

you @ baekyun

baekyun @ you

thIS IS A CHANYEOL HEADCANON BUT I LOOK AT THIS FUCKIN MORON WHO I HATE SO MUCH SOMEONE SAVE HIM FROM HIS IDIOCY

them to you + your group:

“first of all fuck, second FUCK”

“wh-- whT WHAS THAT HIP MOVEMENT. U ARE 4 YRS OLD”

“HE did t h a t.”

“NOOOOOONNNNNNNNNAAAAA ch0k3 me”

“I CANT HEAR YOU OVER U BEING SUCH A HOE”

“i cant beLIEVE THIS STADIUM IS SO QUIET” *ears are actually bleeding*

“NOt TODaY S4T4N”

“I DIDNT ASK FOR THIS”

“how does this have 300M views????? ONLY 300M I--”

“GAAAAAHHHHH WHAT WAS THAT MOVE WHT WAS IT”

“my soul has been touched”

“this is TOOOOOOOO much ma lord”

“DID YOU JUST RIP YOUR SHIRT OFF?“

“TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF!”

“ASDFRTYUJM ive been shot”

ya dig

it’s not verbal abuse if they can’t hear you cause of the bass and the fact your on stage performing

but like

you guys did everything together

practiced

ate

shopped

toured

pranked

T O G E T H E R

like who else in SM mattered

SHINee who?

JK YOUWERE A SHAWOL THROUGH AND THROUGH

you reassure Minho everytime unless you wanted to die that day

YOu EVEN FANGIRLED OVER TAEMIN’s MOVE WITH MINSEOK

BUT YOU OBVI you had MORE THAN ENOUGH ROOM TO BE AN EXO-L and an elf and a cassie and a so-won and DONT FOrget a vip and a---

you get the point

ANYWAY

as you were close with everyone you had a special bond with every individual

YALL STILL TEXT WITH YA BOY KRIS

yOU WENT ON A SHOW IN CHINA WITH LUHAN

TAO LEAVES PUKE COMMENTS ON YOUR INSTA POSTS

my ot12

and as much as you say you are equally close with everyone

errbody knows that be bull the size of russia

yall caNNOT dENy that you and chanyeol have the same crack powder on your philtrums

LIKE KYUNGSOO CANNOT LIVE WHEN YOU TWO ARE TOGETHER

LET HIM LIVEEEEEE

this moment must never die

ya boy be mindin his own business then

BAM BITCH

you and chanyeol be makin D.O. cray af

rest assured he HAS thought of how he’d kill both of you

ANd that’s why chanyeol loves you

like he decided he liked you the moment you lost your breath laughing when he threw a rubber duck at Kyunggsoo’s head, making it squeak in the most demented way no one thought possible

but he knew he loved you when you helped him lighten up on one of his dark days

you had that kind of effect on people

i mean all you did was sit down with him, both of your backs leaned up against each other’s, head occasionally leaning against the other’s head or shoulder, and played some nothings on the guitar and ukulele

but that was more than enough

you were there with him

and that’s what mattered

But literally the moment he accepted his feelings for you

he began to notice something he felt 100000% dumb for not seeing before

the way you laugh when Kyungsoo says a lame-ass joke

the way you always hug him from behind

you did that with literally everyone you were close with sure, 

but Chanyeol noticed you did it with him more 

and he 3

there was also the way you were just always winding up next to Soo when he was around, like he had some sort of magnet on him

and how you just liked poking his cheeks, begging him to show his dimples

which were really faint like gurl--

chANYEOL HAD DIMPLES TOO

CHANYEOL HAS DIMPLES

why daheq did you like his close to nonexistent ones?????????

????????

okay you liked poking Lay’s dimples more

look at my boy, who i love with burning passion ANDWILL DESTROY SM FOR BECAUSE HE JUST WANTS TO BE WITH HIS BAND SM SM SM!!!!! CHINA KOREA POLITICS FK ALL YALL

and suho

and chen

anD FINE--

yeah you did poke his too

literally anyone who remotely has dimples tbh

BT WHY KYUNGSOO

ads;ajsd;lasjdkas #jelly

so chanyeol decides to ask someone about it

so he obviously goes to his wisest hyung

but the day he  wants to talk to Suho, YOU WERE ON A DATE WITH HIM

like a date but not a date date he could tell

BUT A DATE NONETHELESS AND HE WAS KINDA JELLY

so he goes to Baekhyun for some fucking reason

and he’s like “omg u like her i couLDnt FUCKING TELL FROM ALL THE HEARTS IN TH AIR”

instant regret

but like Baek did give him some advice

like 5% was advice

the other 99% was him screaming to just be a man and tell her

so chanyeol is like, “STFU.... also she likes kyungsoo so fml”

and for a hot second Baekhyun has nothing to say

BAEKHYUN HAS NOTHING TO SAY

“idek dude. this is why i flirted with her openly”

Chanyeol punched him for saying that

but he decides he’s going to tell you after like 231109 years

cos Jongdae said you don’t like Kyungsoo and that he’s sure of it

Chanyeol asked how he was sure and he was just all like

“she had a crush on Sungmin hyung before and DID NOT act like that at all.”

That made Chanyeol a lot more hopeful

So he just went for it

and asked if you wanted to get lunch

and then after eating, you guys walked back

and he just sort of blurted it out

“Joahaeyo.”

you just looked at him and chuckled, “Thank you. I like you too, Yeolie.”

bitch are you for real rn

before Chanyeol could clarify, your walking slowed, “I’ve known for a while now.”

ok

wait

w h a t

“Minseok oppa told me.”

?????????? uhm HOW DID HE KNOW

Chanyeol’s hands were waterfalls atm, “Why did he tell you?”

Your face starts burning red and chanyeol cant help but think of it as a bad sign

“I told him I liked him...”

“... and he said he can’t reciprocate because he knows you like me, and that he can’t do that to his dongsaeng.”

waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah 

cool story bro

you liked someone in EXO that was NOT him

cool cool cool

I GUESS CHEN WAS RIGHT 

THANKS

wait did that mean chanyeol was this obvious

wait did that mean chanyeol ruined your chances with his hyung

wait was this why you cried that one time

WaiT WAS THIS WHY YOU HUNG AROUND KYUNGSOO

BECAUSE WHENEVER MINSEOK WAS IN THE ROOM, YOU WOULD GET KINDA STIFF AT A POINT AND KYUNGSOO MAKE A JOKE TO MAKE YOU LAUGH

WASTHIS WHY YOU TWO HUNG OUT MORE

WHY HADN’T HE NOTICED

AND IF EVERYONE ELSE DID

WHY DIDNT THEY TELL HIM

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Chanyeol frowned and called out your name, proceeding to apologize

“Wae? why are you sorry? did you tell minseok to say that to me?“

he couldn’t feel mushy and weird at what you said

“YA dont tell me youre going to be weird around me too. It’s bad enough Minseok oppa distanced himself a bit.”

Chanyeol couldn’t help but be angry, sad, protective, and annoyed all at once at what you just admitted to him

“I’ll tell him to stop.”

You pouted, “you don’t have to tell anyone anything, chanyeol.”

“yes but you don’t deserve to feel awkward around anyone.”

“yes but that was minseok oppa’s choice.”

“yes but he was only doing that because he’s my hyung and he’s dumb.”

“yes but-- 

OU KNOW WHAT WHY DONT WE ALL JUST BE AWKWARD AROUND EACH OTHER”

and so you walked forward fast and tried to ignore chanyeol

Chanyeol, with his freakishly long legs caught up with you though

he caught your arm

“What tf are you doing?“

“Ew dont talk to me its awkward. im awkward. your awkward.”

Chanyeol laughed. “yaaaaa, why do i like you?

“THAT’S WHAT IM THINKING HO”

[taz-clark]

*big le fucking sigh*

i dont intend on going through my account/s and editing them for this fuckery i’ve woken up to, my main is largely SFW anyway and if i lose stuff then its lost. if i didnt save it to my files then i guess i didnt care enough about it to begin with. and if it all survives? yay. i dont intend on going anywhere.

SO WHAT ALT SITES ARE WE DOING TAZ?!

good question me. first heres all the accounts i currently have in various forms of use/understanding:

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/lady_darkstreak

yeah, its a paywall but $1 an month for full access and i’ll draw for you? bargan really.

 FurAffinity: https://www.furaffinity.net/user/lady-darkstreak/

90% furry porn. more of a ‘work account’ than a personal one, but im there alot and while im not a furry myself, the community is decent and largely respects artists, so i like it. plus i cant post whatever i want and not have to worry about “female-presenting-nipples” offending ppl.

FaceBook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100009053557595

i barely use it, but it’s there if FB is your thing. honest tho; dont expect a lot from it, i dont.

Twitter: https://twitter.com/LadyDarkstreak

i still dont know how the fuck it works, but im trying. i found a setting that makes it look more like Tumblr, so thats a thing. my main problem is all the posts blend together but i imagine i’ll figure it out soon enough. this one is SFW. although i might just go with the NSFW one and delete this one in time, we’ll see

DeviantART:  https://www.deviantart.com/lady-darkstreak

basically dead, but i’ve had it for 10yrs so i might as well keep it. sometimes i throw something at it.

--- ---

but! i need sites to share my nsfw content since thats whats being thrown into the bonfire today. and while FA and Patreon are largely just that, i need more.

NSFW twitter: https://twitter.com/TazSmutts

Newgrounds: https://lady-darkstreak.newgrounds.com/

i JUST made these, so nothing there right now, but i fully intend to flood them with my drawings of the D.

are there other places? let me know. not Instgram tho, something about that place dont feel right.