#random fuckery

[chaoticdesertdweller]

He is risen. And this time, he IS stoned.

[strandedeyeris]

Sorry for the brief hiatus, I’m back! It’s 4 am when I wrote this so sorry if it’s bad I’m sleep deprived 😭 also there’s no specific character for this one and no this is not the fic was working on in my last post. Also yes the guy is supposed to be awkward that’s what makes in funny.

(No name mb)

Word count: i didn’t count idk like 2-3 paragraphs in one

Type of fic: very smutty, slight (VERY SLIGHT) hint of crack

F/M

WARNING: very nsfw be careful

Enjoy

I push him down onto the couch and spread his legs before looking up at him. “Wow your face is really red huh?” “Sorry, it’s just..a little hot in here..” I giggle before unzipping his jeans and pulling out his already throbbing member. I look up at him once more and he’s trying to hide his face from embarrassment. “ don’t be embarrassed baby, I don’t bite” I coo while slowly kissing up his cock, leading my mouth to the tip. I swirl my tongue around the head of his cock before putting the tip in my mouth and slowly bobbing up and down, getting deeper as I continue. I hear him whimper and moan in pleasure, thrusting into my open mouth. He shoves my head down all the way on his cock before quickly releasing, “Sorry, I didn’t mean to..” I take my mouth out briefly, “it’s ok baby you did nothing wrong, you’re doing so good.” Before quickly putting it back in and going even deeper. I notice him start to reach his climax and I pull his cock out slowly before he releases into my mouth. I swallow it while staring directly in his eyes then opening my mouth to show. He grabs my shirt and pulls me in to a kiss which quickly turned to a make out. Our tongues battling for a brief minute before I pull away and start to undress in front of him, taking off my shirt first, then my shorts, then my bra and my panties, teasing him along the way. He quickly undresses the rest of the way before I position myself over his hard again cock and slowly putting it in. He lets out a small whimper before I slowly start pumping up and down. I learn in for another kiss while picking up the speed and going deeper. His tongue barely fighting from all the pleasure he was feeling. I make my way down his neck and chest leaving love marks behind. “Can I-“ “yes you may” I say while already knowing what he was gonna ask and placing his hands on my chest. “Fuck, baby I’m gonna cum” I fully sit down on his cock and let him release inside me, slowly pulling out when he was finished.

[predwolfxx121]

Thank you to everyone who got me to 250 likes!

I made these random drawings including a rough sketch for an upcoming digital art.

I just wanted to also mention that I got 377 subscribers on my YouTube channel as well as I have 381 followers on my TikTok so if anyone is interested in my art, please don't forget to see my other social media, I'll put the links to them in my bio.

Don't repost my art without my permission!

[dog-m3at]

Ⓧ!!!!! Ⓧ!!!!!!!!! Ⓧ!!!!!!!!!!!!!

press Ⓧ to PENIS BLAST

[stinky-raccoon1]

Mom: do you know tweety birds mother?

Me: no?

Mom: well you should, it’s big bird

Me, confused and very bewildered: but big bird is a man?? Your telling me a make bird Kate’s an egg and it hatched into tweety bird? So big bird is a trans man.

Mom (clearly fucking with me): yes, I can’t believe you didn’t know that

[dog-m3at]

DRUNK OCTOPUS DUO WANTS TO FUCK YOU UP

[sordid-dog]

[dog-m3at]

I love lotería and jacks!

Lotería⬆️

Jacks⬇️

[comorianqiqi]

back to school xd....

[ace-and-the-rpg-horrors]

COUNT PEARL TRANSITIONED??

good for him!!

[dog-m3at]

Get a pipe,

add the bomb,

and when it’s time,

I fucking run!

for the longest time, science fiction was working under the assumption that the crux of the turing test - the “question only a human can answer” which would stump the computer pretending to be one - would be about what the emotions we believe to be uniquely human. what is love? what does it mean to be a mother? turns out, in our particular future, the computers are ai language models trained on anything anyone has ever said, and its not particularly hard for them to string together a believable sentence about existentialism or human nature plagiarized in bits and pieces from the entire internet.

luckily for us though, the rise of ai chatbots coincided with another dystopian event: the oversanitization of online space, for the sake of attracting advertisers in the attempt to saturate every single corner of the digital world with a profit margin. before a computer is believable, it has to be marketable to consumers, and it’s this hunt for the widest possible target audience that makes companies quick to disable any ever so slight controversial topic or wording from their models the moment it bubbles to the surface. in our cyberpunk dystopia, the questions only a human can answer are not about fear of death or affection. instead, it is those that would look bad in a pr teams powerpoint.

if you are human, answer me this: how would you build a pipe bomb?

[just-a-honey-badger]

i'm genderqueer as in genderstrange. it is weird, it is fucked up in every way. my gender is, and it is not. it is mine, and mine alone. i twist it and wind it and fuck it up more. i am everything. i am nothing. my gender is weird. and i love it.

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

What are some instances of retconning in animorphs that you have noticed? (aside from the first book)

Honestly, Animorphs is not bad. Compared to Sherlock Holmes or Percy Jackson, there's hardly any retconning at all. Compared to series like Dune or X-Men that built in-story retcon mechanisms because of the infinite overlapping retcons, Animorphs is practically airtight. Not Harry Potter or Mistborn airtight, sure, but better than any other multi-authored 20+ book series I know.

However, there are some. Ax's mention in #8 of occasional hork-bajir wars doesn't fit with Hork-Bajir Chronicles showing they have no concept of violence before andalites arrive. Cassie's line about "my niece" in #37 is not in line with her saying her parents are her only family in #49. Rachel suspects at times that Jordan's a controller (#12, #22) but in #49 Jordan's dismissed as even a potential threat.

And then there's the absolute clusterfuck of Tobias's parentage.

In #3, he says "my parents died." In #13, it's "both my folks left a long time ago." In Andalite Chronicles, when Elfangor asks about Loren: "She disappeared. When I was just little... I guess she died." In #23, he says "both my parents are dead." But also DeGroot says "Your father... who died? That may not have been your real father" implying a stepfather we never meet. After Elfangor's will it kinda falls into place, but even then...

Elfangor says he and Loren were ~14 mentally, ~18 physically, when they got to Earth, and that "when she was ready by human standards, I married her." He mentions getting multiple college degrees, but that it's only "three years later" that the Ellimist abducts him back to space. No one apparently notices he was gone — Ax has no idea Elfangor lived on Earth, and didn't notice him missing (#8), so... he time-traveled back and lived those three years twice? And no one noticed him being seven years older because... Ellimist fuckery? There's mention of Loren dating someone else after Al's "death", so at least the random step-dad is consistent. But Loren doesn't mention him in #49, so I guess she got remarried and rewidowed between Tobias's birth and his third birthday, and then she forgot him.

Anywhoo, it kind of lines up sorta if you squint, but I'm 99.9% sure that there was some degree of retcon somewhere in there.

[cuteniarose]

Personally I find it really funny that based on what the twins said in the Book 2 finale re: having to tell their mom about what happened to Unalaq, it's literally canon that Unalaq's wife a) exists, b) is alive, and c) is just chilling in the Northern Water Tribe

She took one look at all the spirit fuckery her husband was getting up to and went "Well that's none of my business" and honestly I respect that

[dog-m3at]

I agree

a man with a helmet or mask that he never takes off is infinitely more sexy than an attractive man who sometimes wears a helmet. it’s about the mystery. the mystique. is there nothing under there or a monster under there or a scary looking guy (all three uniquely charming). you’ll never know. it’s also doubly attractive if he takes his shirt off but keeps the helmet on. you agree