#thats another thing im just so fuckin stupid for what

[snobgoblin]

.

[impostorsshow]

I love going on Tumblr because I can't sleep hoping to get cheered up by the fandom blogs I follow and then having to clear out my following tab because my feed is nothing but "the world is ending everyone is horrible DNI list donate to the 50th person that can't afford rent".

I fully understand even making this post is hypocritical but I don't have the energy to fight with my phone constantly crashing to draw a doodle to justify the post otherwise I just wish I could find a blog that doesn't appear to be a normal art blog only to suddenly find myself overrun with depressing reblogs. Why do people actively look for and repost depressing things on the internet aren't most people nowadays complaining about being overstressed. Maybe don't search out sources of stress m8 that's the main reason I don't use Twitter or Instagram like cmon man anyway. Uh feel free to send an ask if you want me to draw something, don't reblog this post to say it because that would mean you just did not fuckin have reading comprehension at all

[gamblersdoll]

semi nafw leading into nsfw, tiktok trend gone wrong, teasing, hakari pov (not my usual, testing out.)

you must love getting fucked up in your guts, dont you? you like when i have to fuck you slow and stupid, huh?

you must have to. these stupid tiktok videos making you think its a good idea to test it out. especially the new ones as of late. and you act as if i dont fuckin’ know what they are.

yer also pretty stupid, posting on there saying ‘im going to try this trend on him!’ as if i dont fuckin’ follow you. maybe thats what good dick does to your tiny brain.

“cmere bae, come sit next to me—“ you say, a teasing smile on your face and taking your index finger and beckoning him to come to you. “come and take yo drawls off.”

i look up from my phone, this bitch must think im stupid. as if im not always on go. speaking of which, its been maybe two weeks. i raise my eyebrow, pushing my pants down. fuck, these boxers. probably gunna have to give these to you, too.

“damn, you at the edge of the bed, you bout to fall off.” you giggle, watching your gambler boyfriend look at you.

im at the edge of the bed, huh?

i drop my phone onto the coffee table, pulling myself off the couch and crawling on top of you.

“hakari! im kidding!” you squeal, giggles and eyes closed. you pat at my chest, babbling about whatever the fuck it was about some trend.

“i aint.” i say, eyes going half lidded and snapping my fingers. you stop patting at me, thighs suddenly trembling. you definitely felt that. “did you feel a tingle?”

you nod, good as you usually are.

“kari..” you whine, trying to wriggle and writhe out of my grasps. “p-please..”

“please what?” i ask again, pressing a kiss to your neck and licking a long ass stripe. “use your words, pretty baby.”

“need you..”

“yeah? i know you do, i can feel it.” i chuckle, reaching a hand down to pinch your clit through your shorts. that was another thing, been told you about wearing such tight shorts around me. might just pinch you, yeah?

you moan again, nipples getting hard through your tank top and visible.

“can feel that muh’ fucker..” i whisper, a hand now pinching a nipple. “seems like yer little video went wrong..”

you roll your eyes in pleasure, and just using one of my hands, do i rip your shorts off. youre not wearing panties again, huh? oh well, too bad fer this pretty pussy here.

“baby..!” you squeal, my free hand now unbuckles my belt and jeans. “please, need you, please please.”

“what did we learn, babydoll?” i ask, pulling my boxers down to my knees and tapping my tip against your clit. you jump, poor precious baby so sensitive.

“not to do so many trends on you..”

“and?”

“and not to wear tight shorts around you….”

i slap my tip against your clit again, you jump and almost cry. shit, is my cock that heavy or are you just so sensitive like a bitch?

“yeah, thats my girl.” i say, biting a lip and aligning my cock to your slit, slowly pushing myself inside while i make you watch it slip in with me.

[moonlit-dreamers]

Can you rate all Eclipse ships?

*rubs my grubby hands together* i abso-fuckin-lutely can

the lower they go doesnt mean "i despise it" (unless specified) its just that i dont find it interesting/dont personally ship it/never think about it. this also wont include poly ships bc then i just Wouldnt Stop. btw im not gonna edit this so if some shit is typed wrong then uh . sucks ig hjgfjhfh

eclipse/solar - 10/10 - nothing could be better than this. this is my otp above sun/eclipse. nothing can be improved upon bc it is perfect. learning to love urself by loving another version of urself? SIGN 💥 ME 💥 UP 💥

eclipse/sun - 10/10 - second thing i ever shipped (first was sun/solar <3) and its stuck with me ever since. enemies to lovers. wonderful. scrumptious

lord eclipse/sunvant - 10/10 i say this counts to be added to the list bc i fucking can. theyre also my otp. toxic codependency. sunvant having pure blind devotion to lord eclipse despite everything hes done to hurt him? GHOD

eclipse/sunbeam - 8/10 - grumpy cat x golden retriever. or maybe a yorkie with how much sun yaps ghdfghfgh. he'd probably act so fucking annoyed with how much sunbeam yaps but in reality he actually pays attention to all of it bc despite how little of it makes sense its actually entertaining

eclipse/moonshine - 8/10 - theyre nerds that kiss each other. they work on games and random projects together. theyre wonderful

eclipse/ruin - 8/10 - okay im actually writing these out of order and i was almost done THEN FUCKING FORGOT THIS. toxic yaoi at its finest. while ruin is still forcing eclipse to work for him he gets Silly™️ and just goes "i can do whatever i want and nobody will stop me" and ofc he does. if that includes torture or messing with him until his mind breaks then thats up to you. would this be accurate to canon ruin? absolutely not. do i care? fuck no <3

eclipse/dark sun - 7/10 - ADDING THIS IN EDITING BC I WAS FUCKING STUPID AND FORGOT THEM OTL. this the good shit. toxic yaoi. i have thoughts but theyre all gone rn idk wtf happened to them so imagine i made a shitty summary of a fucked up scenario

eclipse/old moon - 7/10 - gwuh creator/creation beloved. idk man. it could either be healing and fluff or angst and toxic. you pick <3

eclipse/solarflare - 7/10 - again. creator/creation. im unwell. AND YET ANOTHER COULD BE TOXIC OR FLUFFY. me thinks onesided pining from sf while eclipse is either oblivious or ignores it would be fun. OR they both use it as a chance to explore bc why not :3

eclipse/earth - 6/10 - not my favorite but its good for fluffy shit. idk why but every time i decide to doodle eclipse being flustered its always with earth. she just appears and makes it her job. idk what to do my hands just move on their own

eclipse/nexus - 5/10 - lower than old moon bc i just dont find it as interesting

eclipse/lunar - 5/10 - personally not that interested in it. but if you bring it up in the middle of a conversation another alter WILL come running over. he responds to it faster than his own damn name. ask him and he'd start going OFF.

eclipse/ballora - 4/10 never think about it but it could be fun

eclipse/bloodmoon - 4/10 - think it could be fun. again, could be toxic or fluffy.

eclipse/killcode - 4/10 - yet another "good ship but not personally interested". tho i think it could be fun. giant soft monster x angry small creature

eclipse/puppet - 3/10 - i like it more than puppet/foxy but thats only bc its eclipse added. i just. i dont like puppet. shes getting better but for a while she was SO annoying to me and i just. my opinion is tainted 😔

eclipse/vincent - 2/10 - i can see it? maybe? who fuckin knows lol

eclipse/anyone else - 1/10 - im just lumping everyone else into one thing so i dont go on forever. basically just the "never thought about it and probably wont continue thinking about it" ships

[andieluvsduckie]

OKAY HELLO THERE FOLKS im here rn to tell you abt a heathers au i have where jd survives !! i wrote most of this vv late at night so forgive me if it doesnt make sense or if its dumb lol, also this is based off the movie bcuz i havent seen the musical yet

(copypasted from notes)

(putting it under the cut cuz its long as FUCK)

-okay so theres multiple versions i have of this au, in one of them jd and veronica arent together, but that made me kinda sad (my poor little mega-crush-on-jd heart doesnt want him to be lonely </3) so i have another au where their shared secrets end up keeping them together, and then that one also has two versions, one where they have a kid and one where they dont (this is proof i have too much free time amd i write shit way too late at night) (also i have way more hcs abt the "they do stay together" version lmao)

-so the bomb didnt work quite as well as he thought it wld. he still got blown the fuck up but not bad enough to kill him (obvi). someone called an ambulance (im not sure who but definitely not veronica /lh), he got rushed off to hospital, he was there for quite a while and got a lot of scars and stuff but somehow he managed to survive (they thought he was a total goner man)

-veronica didnt know he was still alive for a few weeks. the explosion was on the news, but she was majorly avoiding tv altogether at the time (no matter where you are the news is always reporting on some sort of death and tragedy, and it served as WAYYYYY too much of a reminder of what she and jd did). she didnt find out til she actually saw him in person

-she was at the 711 (or wherever the fuck they got the slushies from idk its midnight rn) getting potato chips (yes this is an important detail to me. dont ask me why.) and he happened to be there at the same time

-she totally freaked the hell out when she saw him ("no. no! youre dead! youre dead! youre fucking dead!" "well you see, the thing is, im actually not.") and it took her awhile to come to terms with the situation

-in the "veronica-less" au, they ran into each other a few times after that, veronica refused to talk with him, and he ended up leaving sherwood and going to. um. somewhere else idk thats honestly as far as i got with this version 👍👍👍

-in the "they stay together" version (holy fuck i need proper names for these man), they also kept running into each other, but this time it worked out different yk (god i sound stupid sorry). they were both rlly conflicted abt it. it was like they both wanted to see each other again, but at the same time it felt like the worst thing that cld possibly happen. but you see, it kept happening. and happening. and happening. its like they couldnt  avoid each other. and at some point or another, they started just wanting it to happen. then kind of actively trying to make it happen. and then he finally just asked her out. she said no bcuz she needed some time to think abt it (they did go out a couple weeks later tho)

-(skip back in time a lil here bcuz im a fuckin scatterbrain lmao) when veronica found out jd was still alive she was scared of him yk (i mean i wld be too if my supposed-to-be-dead ex showed up outta nowhere) but she realised that like. he changed. smth happened in his silly lil head when he nearlu died, and he realised that everything that happened was totally fucked up and he actually regrets it and wants to do things different yk. (wanna be a better person? have a near-death experience /j)

-youd expect them to go get slushies when they finally do go on a date. NOPE. they actually go out for breakfast and get waffles (jd absolutely 100% loves waffles and you cannot convince me otherwise)

-at some point or another, veronica buys him little vinyl dinosaur stickers (yknow like the kind you can put on laptops and helmets and stuff). i dont know when this happens. i dont know why this happens. but i know it happens.

-jd kinda wants to be a theatre actor for a lil while, he ends up having tiny roles in a few things but he never rlly has any cool roles yk (im not quire sure why this is part of my au now but its probably just bcuz i wanna watch the musical lmao)

-okay i told you there was two points where this au branches off and congratulations youve just reached the second point 👍👍👍 this is where the path splits between "jd and veronica with no kids" and "jd and veronica with a kid"

-in the "no kids" version, they cant have a kid bcuz theyre scared that they wont be able to raise a child properly and the kid will turn out like they did, and thats the scariest thought in the world to them

-in the "jd and veronica with kids" version (srsly i need the power to create au titles man eueueue), they have a teenage daughter named alina

-theyre super super SUPER protective of her and like theyre always fretting abt whether theyre doing a good job

-they dont tell her abt what they did in '88 bcuz theyre worried abt how shell react, sometimes they think maybe they shld say smth but they always end up agreeing to "just wait til later" (theyre never gonna tell her man theres no way in hell)

-jd knows that the only reason veronica was involved in the deaths was bcuz she was with him, and so he gets extra extra worried whenever alina starts dating someone bcuz hes scared that shell get taken down the same path that he took veronica down all those years ago (which is very unlikely but i mean can ya blame him?)

-jd 100% needs therapy but cant get it bcuz how the fuck do you tell a therapist that you murdered three ppl and then tried to explode yourself. so instead he has a diary he writes in every day and he uses it as sort of self-therapy (i tooooootally didnt just take one of my own personality traits or habits or wtvr the word is and give it to him. totally not. totally. 👍)

-uh thats it for now but i definitely have more au hcs tucked away in my one singular braincell, i just need to find em apparently- also apologies for the excessive parentheses 👍👍👍

[zundamind]

wow, would you look at that! it's been a full ass year since you fucked me over! september 29th.... yeahh..... XD our fuck-you-versary! hi clifford!

in case you dont remember, the name piko might jog your mind. yeah thats me!! hellwo!! honestly you shouldve known better than to stick with your old username but hey props on you for changing it last minute! almost didnt find you for a second lolll!!

i wanted to drop in and say HEY! HELLO! HI! and give you some status updates :3

update one: i'm getting better!! no thanks to you, of course. and actually i should say we're getting better. yep! thats what happens when you suffer so bad your brain cant take suffering solo! XD

update two: while my mental health has been at an all time low ever since you fucking dropped me like a fucking ROCK, ive been getting over things lately! my clean streaks are now longer than a week! i no longer want to kms! im even making friends again!

update three: while both of the above statements are true, you still live in my mind rent free. i remember when i first stumbled across your blog a few months ago, i had a full on spiral! not anymore, though. i am STEEL, BABY! also you spinning in the mental microwave rent free is why i'm sending you this heartfelt ask!

man.... even when i try, i still find you somehow and its never intentional. like imagine scrolling the tptm tag only to be straight up jumpscared by your ex best friend's username! how embarrassing!

also i'm sorry but i have to say the reason(s) you left are sooo fucking stupid..... what, cus i was weird? come on. everyones a little weird. even a little deviantart weird. oh and because of some stupid opinions that shouldntve even mattered if you were actually a friend? get real, trey. what if i left your ass because you had a fuckin biting kink? that wouldve been funny actually. like making a sad callout post on twitter thats just "my friend left me because i wasnt vanilla enough!" XDDD

oh, and if you ever see your "stalker" again, assuming you're not thinking its me and that its actually your previous qpr or whatever the fuck, say hi! i find it funny as FUCK, since, you know, you were considering cyberstalking me at one point. and tell chaos i said hi too. i'd also mention mayu, but do you two even keep in touch anymore? probably not, considering the weird things she's done.

anyways thats the end of my relay. if you dont want these kinds of asks again, i suggest either turning asks off or just straight up deleting your tumblr and/or making another one that is NOT connected to any username youve used in the past, because in that case i'll just find your ass again lmaooo. remember! every year on this day will be the day i remind you that you are NOT allowed to stay sane X3

sincerely, your most hated, piko. (i hardly use my old blog anymore, so have fun finding my current blog! and do what you want with this ask, make a callout post, scream into the ethers, reply to it, idc.)

this should stay private but idc

i know what i did was wrong piko! i was 12-13.

dont take this as me excusing myself. i had horrible emotional regulation back then, ive healed from everything back there. you dont deserve to be called out because ur like. 14-15.

do not bring mayu or chaos into this,weve all healed and forgot abt you.

i overreacted bc of very worthless things because i was basically obsessed witj you, you were my fp, if you didnt know.

completely forgot you even existed, i havent been checking your profiles at all in months. you shouldnt either, please forget about me. you'll drive yourself crazy.,

if you think im going to "cancel" you, no im not. for your sake, please dont interact with me anymore. i apologize for how i acted over stupid things, but we were both young and idiotic. im also a system, i dont even remember half of the things you did bc of that.

move on. ive moved on, weve all moved on.

dont bother yourself with me, you dont need to.

[kasaneteto]

obviously been in my posting era for the past few months & ive been thinking about that and what it means for me so some thoughts on that

posting as much as i have been was sparked by having to end my most recent relationship due to the realization that we were codependent & it was making it hard for us to function effectively. finn was always my guy to ramble at but there would always be times that they didnt have anything to say in response so they would just be like “okay” and i would feel so annoying :( they were never annoyed (well not usually i cant say they were NEVER annoyed by me) but my mind always catastrophizes social interactions that leave me feeling self-conscious to mean “oh they hate you”

anyways. for a while i was kind of worried that my codependency habit has graduated from finn -> posting & while im not sure that ISNT the case… i do think the posting has been good for me. ive been journaling for a couple years now but it doesn’t help me in the same way as posting stuff like this. its harder to process thoughts when im just talking to myself vs writing something out thats meant to be for someone else to read. writing with the intent of it being for someone to see helps me process things so much easier, and that doesn’t really work when im writing it in a place nobody can see it. when i was a kid i would post deviantart journals in the same way. of course back then i was a neglected child who was just looking for validation in any form & where i got it most was the internet.

i think its the fact that ive been doing it ever since i was a kid that made me feel like making posts like these were juvenile in nature and something i should move on from. but since making an effort to be more true to myself & not let embarrassment or the fear of being judged get to me, ive found that i have the strong urge to make posts and that it brings me joy when i do! it really has helped me have a clearer understanding of the way i think/feel. plus tumblr rly does kinda feel like a home website. it helps that it hasn’t changed much and a lot of the userbase i was around in its heyday are still here. it feels like a comfortable place to scream into the void where im not worried about who’s potentially seeing this shit. & thats another thing - it has helped me feel less annoying in general!

im so used to feeling like my presence is inherently bothersome and that any self-assertion is going to make people wish i wasn’t there. this feeling extrnds to posting anywhere. but thats so fucking stupid!!!! if people dont like me or are that annoyed by me they dont have to fuckin look!!!!!! just unfollow me idfc!!!!! i feel good about the level of clarity i have in my life rn and posting long rambling introspective shit like this has been doing wonders in helping me keep myself grounded. so i will continue to do so. i will say though i sometimes wonder who all is reading this shit lmao. watch there be someone out there who’s just obsessed with my ass waiting on baited breath for my next post. if thats the case then get well soon bitch….im probably too unhinged for you to handle 💅

[wolves0nmars]

american healthcare by penelope scott but make it leon s. kennedy.

verse 1, "when i was seven years old i saw a dead man in the road..." could relate to the early loss of his parents and leon's first experience with a police officer. plenty of children are exposed to violence at an early age, and leon is no exception. this experience desensitized him to violence and to cope with it he focused on the positive experience he had with that cop, and decided he wanted to be an officer in order to help people.

he helped claire, sherry, ashley, etc. there's actually kind of a pattern of him "saving" female characters and kind of affirming his own masculinity by doing so. this makes his interactions with ada and luis very interesting, the former of course being a woman that doesnt need his saving and the latter being a man that desperately needs his saving. but thats a conversation for another time.

and in the chorus of the song, "you corporate fucking prick, i did not become a doctor just to suck the devil's dick" relates to him a lot. because leon s kennedy sucks a lot of d---he has a lot of experiences with "corporate overlords", like simmons. but also this doesn't just apply to specific individuals. leon is in law enforcement because he wants to protect people. he was a police officer because he wanted to protect people, he is an agent because he wants to protect as many people around the world in the long run optimally in the most efficient way. but he consistently runs into the problem that his job as a police officer is not to protect people. its to protect private property. his job as an agent is not to protect people. its to protect corporate interests. he's in the wrong job.

i really hope we see leon be a firefighter or an emt some day. like, obviously hes a little old and definitely traumatized enough, but those are occupations where your job literally is just to help people, not keep corporate interests in mind.

and in verse 2 "I asked the right questions, i never even really got bored" relates to him really well too. leon quite easily slipped into his role as "right hand man", never wondering or asking just what exactly left hand was up to. because truthfully, he didn't want to know. he preferred the comfort that came with not knowing.

or in verse 3, "it trickled into both my ears, it got louder over the years, until all that i could hear were fuckin' flies" probably relates to leon the most out of any line from this song. it perfectly represents how incredibly corrupted leon has become. it's also worth mentioning how resident evil viruses do sometimes take the form of insects. you could kind of look at it like a direct parallel between government corruption and the viruses he's fighting. they're both equally parasitic, infectious, and harmful. i imagine sometimes leon just wishes he'd be infected finally, because it's better than this torturous process of corruption. in the pre chorus, she says "sometimes it's like they'd rather die" and i think sometimes it's like he'd rather die.

it's such a great song about american capitalism and how easily it can corrupt people's naive hopes and dreams of helping people. because leon s kennedy... has been corrupted. time and time again throughout the RE franchise we see commanding officers from private corporations, governments, law enforcement, etcetera being revealed as evil and every time... the main characters just kill the guy and get back to work. they never stop and consider... maybe it's not about just one guy. maybe its not about just this one individual that happened to be evil. maybe something made him evil... maybe something allowed him to be evil... and maybe its the exact same thing that i work for... or something like that idk lolllllll.

i really hope we see leon kind of "break the cycle" and have the kinds of realizations that are in this song because like... BITCH... that stupid little boy is lucky hes so pretty!!!

also im really sorry for derailing a song about a womans experience in academia and social services under capitalism and stuff to be about this white boy in the CIA... i hope this little analysis doesnt detract from the actual song. cause like... its a great song and we dont need to make it about leon stupid little bitch kennedy for it to be good.

[melissa-titanium]

Opinions on self ship? And also do u know any self shippers?

i see you casper... unless thats litaerllt NOT you and im fuckin stupid u,mmm BUT ANWYAYYS.

SO much history with selfship. so much lore no one understands. selfship was my FUCKING LIFE . i dont know if sans fangirls are the same thing but that was what it was with me sort of. except it wasnt sans it was like 600 different characters and i was 8-11 and I WILL ADMIT... i dont personally do much self ship anymore because i think the aroaceness is overpowering even w/fictional schmoobers hahahaha BUT i love my friends self ships alot . funniest thing for me is to be a wing man to aforementioned self ships i LOVE IT i love being the third wheel i hope it makes me super endearingly annoying.

overall, selfship is like. one of my core traits even if i don't really Do it MYSELF anymore, who knows maybe another crush will pop up eventually for 4 now i'm content with just being annoying about other peoples ships + hammertime.

BUT, as for folks i know ?

@ bordle (hey man :> im not sure if you consider yourself as such but BRODLY BRODLY BRODLY)

@ fishy-sandwich (almost guaranteed you'll see this unless im wrong about anon bein you hahahahahaha but hi c:)

@ umm... there's definitely some body im missing. i'm really sorry my memory isn't all that good. but thank you for asking anon-whom-i-believe-i-know-as-my-friend-named-casper :)

[adollt]

ME2

OK to be fair jacobs loyalty mission is quick and fast its the fact that hes a fucking POS who took advantage of his position to outcast males and keep a haram of woman, and you might ask "well how does that work" cause they shipwrecked (a massive frieghter not for landing) on a planet thats uninhabited, their food stores are shot and so he kept the processed foods for himself and the crew that survived. and made the rest of the "unimportant" crew eat local food that made lost brain cognitive functions, in turn making people really really stupid. and he banished all the males, and kept all the woman. yes its implied heavily. I wish the fanon ending was true, coulda talking him into Heroing himself. but dude has no fucking emotions after it all. its just not very satisfying of an ending, and all that just ... feels kinda forced on by the writters I mean Its just a way to go with a story IG. just wasnt very satisfying as I was more interested in Wrex holding off the outsiders before we finished off our talk

BUT ANYWAYS, HOLY SHIT LAIR OF THE SHADOW BROKER IS THE FUCKING BEST GODDAMN DLC FOR MASS EFFECT AND I FINALLY PLAYED IT. I love going Renegade Shep for a majority of the game, why should I care if you have a 1 mother you plan on killing. the mission before jacobs I literally killed 304,942 Batarians in one move, and you think I wont shoot some random woman to kill someone so deadly? im not a cop, imma fuckin specter and were gonna blast you

There was like another boss fight earlier but not as good as the Spectres I thought was gonna be a cool fweind, everytime she went and hid away and yelled she was coming down I was in the power wheel so it froze in this section (miss me photo)

b-b-b-b-b-but why are you working f-f-f-f-for cerburus t-t-t-t-heir twaitors

and so we got onto the ship, this fucking Lightning Chucker 3000. looked sick as hell (sorry forgot to get photos) this is finally where my Insanity Vanguard is unleashing, were launching into the fray pumping shotgun blasts AND using grunts move on myself to get super shields has made my survivability 200 times higher, I didnt even know that was a thing in this game and I would say without that buff Vanguard is stuck being a gimmiked Soldier

we found liars friend that she made after we fucknig blew up (he also helped saves us from me1 - me2) where he recovered our body with liara and gave them to Cerberus. hes a bro, I call him "Oil Slick" cause hes got a beautiful bald drell dome on him. But enough for .... our home boy, we needa bust him outta his Electric chair and to do that we need knock all power ya. so we confront the pussy faced "shadow broker" what an interesting species and what a POS one at that for murdering humans when we were barely getting off our rock in massacre's. Liara calling him out as a slaver kidnapping him as a literal war trophy / pet is all that hes worth anyways. So we started fuckin blastin. HE FUCKIN KNOCKS THE FUCK OUTTA OUR BOY GRUNT FOR THE ENTIRE FIGHT AND THEN WE GO INTO HAVING TO FIST FIGHT THE MFKER, i shoulda recorded it. BUT FUCK IT WAS SO COOL TO SEE VANGUARD SHEPARD FUCKING THROWING 1 2 WITH SOMETHING BIGGER THAN A FUCKING KROGAN

man shepard, is the best character in gaming. hands down.

[charmanderxerneas]

(going to be tagging this as ruin spoilers but please dont comment any spoilers because we're not actually done with all the game. We've gotten 2/3 endings and are working towards the secret ending where you have to find hidden cameras while also replaying and seeking out the secrets we missed. This is seriously just insane ramblings aimed at no one i just need to get my thoughts out and suggest u scroll past.)

I seriously like. Am struggling to figure out the whole plot of ruin in an analytical story timeline sense. No i do not read or care about fan theories, i interpret the game and the lore by playing it and looking at all the clues myself thank you very much, so my interpretation of the lore is. different from most fans (you have to consider: very autistic, fnaf a Huge special interest for me. So when i analyze lore, i analyze as much as i can, every single secret. And i feel like a lot of people Miss main lore secret plot points. Im not trying to be a contraian, id love for the fans to have good theories. But like 70% of the time they dont. Or theyre dumb lil kids who blindly listens to mat pat)

my interpretation of sb is different from most fans and theories (mostly because I actually take help wanted and ar into account and can like. Use my brain to understand the differences between the vanessas (there are two. The murderer vanny, who we play as in help wanted, is referred to in ar, and is the one in the therapist tapes) and vanessa the nightguard, who's COMPLETELY unrelated and just an innocent nightguard who happens to have the same name and face as vanessa murderer (though it is also possible to me that like. Murderer vanessa chose to try to look more like nightguard vanessa in an attempt to shift the blame of her crimes, but we dont know this for sure.)and i dont think the therapist tapes are two different people because thats STUPID and it obviously is murderer vanessa (people just. Cannot possibly understand that a person being possessed by an entirely different entity might have changes in her prrsonality. Or that a person with anxiety might have something similar to selective mutism or at the VERY least: troubles speaking because of said murderer in her brain)

ANYWAYS THATS A HUGE ASS TANGENT. MY MAIN THOUGHTS AS OF PLAYING RUIN RN (Please dont spoil things for me im not completely done) is that mainly: i dont know who is speaking to us or who mimic is.

There may be two different people communicating with us with the vanni network (as evidenced by helpi changing eye colors and how like. Some of the motives seem conflicting?) Initially i was like "oh its glitchtrap or williams spirit or something." But that doesnt make any sense because glitchtrap gets Trapped and is worked against.

Even tho that was my first thought: i dont think mimic is burntrap, or william, or glitchtrap. But i dont know what it is, because there are no other obvious characters that it could be in mind (tho since its michaels old fnaf 6 restaurant theyre in, and we saw the blob down there, god knows it could be any number of old ass animatronics or spirits)

Another very fuckin obvious thought is: hey where the fuck is vanny. With the whole mask mechanic, the plot revolving around glitchtrap, ect, you THINK we'd see her st least once. And though she has a cameo in the bad ending which is clearly a vision/fantasy/trick, she doesnt actually appear. The INSTANT That we started this game i speculated: is she talking through helpi? The yellow eyes reminded me of an early sb teaser artwork where we see a close up of a vanessas face with striking, yellow eyes, and i was never sure the significance of that... But i dont think its related at all, as mimic seems to be the one speaking when helpi has yellow eyes. Is mimic related to vanny somehow? I wouldnt assume so.

Whats weird about vanny not being there is it makes it seem like shes not carrying out glitchtraps bidding, which is odd. Dont y'all come at me with that "Gregory helped her!" Crap, the burntrap ending is the canon ending so that never happened. It makes sense for her to be against him (shes never really been on her side, shes the RELUCTANT follower. She explicitly does not want to do any of the horrible shit, but shes beinf forved to) but i just. Gahh i cant figure it out

I WILL figure it out just you wait. I will figure out what my interpretation of the lore as so good as soon as I finish the game just you wait

[twiggyart6]

collecting short funny things to write under fanart of characters you really love

please feel free to add more thank you :3

(this is long as shit be prepared)

ough

looking at them

my friend :)

mwehehe

augh

I can't believe this

brain blasted

what a little freak

do you even care

be so fucking for real

your kidding

what a weirdo

a wonderous creature

consider this

from my personal collection

what the

I'm so normal

I'm not normal

why are they like that

evil swag

TEEHEE

I'm gonna frow up

yeah this is pretty cool

pretty fucked up dog

have you seen this?

my beautiful princess

I'm ill

oh good heavens!

my son. he has every disease

this shit aint nothin to me man

I laurve them

yoink

just a little bit. as a treat

tell them to stop

me when I GET you

MY GUY

the psychic worm (wohwohwohwohw)

good lord

cuteness aggression towards them

what the fuck ever

im feeling something

sigh

me when the

GRRAAAHH

im fucking serious

love it when they appear

its becoming unhealthy

go white boy go!

your never gonna believe this

worst guy ive ever seen

their just so ... drawable

sorry guys

i saw it in a dream

she is very gorgeous to me!

i see them when i close my eyes

my little scrungle

be so fucking for real

i can do whatever i want

bitch

yeah

my baby girl

my little kitty meow meow

they've done something to me

i gotta get outa here

yep

my favorite white man

dude!?

full of joy a whimsy

going cray cray!

well....

erm

heyy gurl wasup

she is beuty she is grace

aaaaanything could happen

just like me fr

its time

yahoo!

divine retribution

yay!!

so was foretold in the prophecy

their so ... woah

yessir

god. fucking. damn.

they understand me

you are not immune to propaganda

Explodes character with mind

Forgive me

I would tell them my most depraved thoughts

for the win!

my treasure my beloved

awesome

oh yeah woo yeah

thats it thats the post

this above all else

-INHALE-

had to get it out of my system

you absolute baby buffoon

but make it epic

dont question it

gay baby jail

mwah <3

i want to make them into bread

no guys you don't get it

i got nervous

every fuckin time man

[puts face in hands and groans loudly]

no way

DONT DO THIS TO MEEEEE

take a deep breath

stupid little bow wow

cringeposting once again

abandon society, embrace insanity

god has let me draw another day

had to do it

changed my brain chemistry

so the thing is-

im going to make you so girlfail

pathetic wet cat

guys.

their neat idk

or something like that

ATTENTION!!

i have the disease and its terminal

shrimply amazing!

hits you with the beam

smile :)

send help

oh hi didn't see you there

no i will not elaborate

the creature is demonic in nature

i think there's something wrong with them

i think there's something wrong with me

its fine

woah woah woah

do you even realize what you've done

very cool

do you see my vision

whatever the fuck this is called

the strugler

interesting..

oh i got you dont worry

nobody move

character on the brain always and forever

#1 hater

funny you should say that

nature is healing

imagine a guy. now imagine them again

ooo mama

get drawn idiot

get obsessed over idiot

if only they were real

post this character instantly

your honor i need them

ive got some notes

A juicy morsel

I want to push them down the stairs

They wouldn’t dare

(Eyes wide and mouth frothing) yeah!

my beautiful wife <3

[cogbreath]

hi so whoever this anon is if youre following me can you fuck off. its clear you're just being transmisogynistic for no reason. the ppl whos urls u mentioned arent even people i would know. why r u in my inbox about it. you misgendered the second woman you mentioned. the first thing is just straight up gross. i really dont gaf if women or anyone on here want to post their bodies. i do it on my nsfw blog myself. its kinda fucked up and gross that apparently ppl are sharing screenshots of that woman's nsfw images without her consent? thats what it sounds like youre saying to me. fuck off with this transmisogynistic nonsense. its very very clear thats your intent here you have no actual evidence or effort put into your claims of racism or abuse here. this is clearly bad faith shit and you're only mentioning it (whether its real or not) for sake of trying to get me on board with ur harassment cult. fuck off. im not fuckin stupid i can tell the difference between people seriously warning me of a users racism and someone scapegoating. if u were serious you would have only mentioned those things and detailed them. instead you come telling me "hey theres screenshots of a trans woman's nsfw pics going around haha also another one who i will go onto misgender is apparently racist hehe"

you freaks arent slick or smart with that shit.

idk if ur a terf or a transandrophobia truther or whatever but u are not on my side and never will be.

p.s. at this point also i really really can't care that there are ppl out there who have kinks of things that r triggering for me. okay? i cant stop anyone from it even if i personally think its distasteful or disrespectful. so just stop telling me that. if i encounter it on my own time i unfollow and block. thats enough management for me youre not helping me or anyone really by telling me the kinks of ppl ive never even heard of before or encountered. get a new hobby this is just weird.

[pesterloglog]

Dave Strider, Rose Lalonde

Act 5, page 3876-3880

-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] --

TG: heres one for you

TG: its a whopper

TG: are you ready

TT: For what?

TG: this huge fuckin whopper im about to just say

TT: You mean a canard of behemothic embellishment?

TG: what

TT: Or was your resolve finally dismantled by the siren's song of all that flame broiled beef?

TG: no no

TG: ok first do you even have burger kings out in the fucking woods

TG: why do you reference things that obviously arent in the woods like terrible burgers

TT: I'll limit my establishments of reference to lumber mills and sugar shanties from now on.

TT: Also, there's a Burger King less than forty minutes from my house. I won't let this stand in the way of the new policy though.

TG: there is

TG: ok whatever

TG: im talking about a dream i just had

TG: i mean it was a doozy like psychologically speaking

TG: doozy is a slightly dumber word than whopper

TT: Certainly less delicious.

TG: it was absurdly heavy handed my subconscious was really slathering it on

TG: like whatever tangy sludge the king himself squirts on his bargain patties

TG: its possible that i dreamt it ironically i dunno

TG: i figured youd be interested in hearing about it its every bit as thick and juicy as a half pound of sizzling grade A premium ok this is stupid weve got to get burgers out of this conversation

TG: are you busy

TT: Yes.

TG: cool listen to this

TT: I thought you didn't want me to analyze your dreams anymore.

TG: no but this one is too good not to put under the microscope with your whole precocious psychotherapy shtick its almost laughably symbolic of all my mental problems assuming i actually have those

TG: its grotesquely pregnant with meaning

TG: all gestating at least 8 gooey octuplets thrashing around in an undulating belly full of mind slime

TT: Maybe we can start by evaluating that troubling metaphor.

TG: no look

TG: i just want your professional take on how many things in my dream symbolize dicks

TT: We've already established that all of your dreams are packed with enough homoerotic symbolism to lift Freudian theory from the ashes of discreditation.

TG: yeah thats a given but i didnt even dream about puppets this time

TT: Are you serious?

TT: I'm clearing my schedule. This is a major breakthrough.

TG: i know

TG: it was so much more relaxing and enjoyable

TG: it was about me dying repeatedly

TT: Go on.

TG: i was in this dark place surrounded by this big flock of crows

TG: god this is so generically morbid

TG: im sorry in advance for exposing you to my unconscious minds retarded cliches

TT: It's ok.

TT: They wouldn't be cliches if they didn't comprise the unanimously understood bedrock of phallic symbolism, with no other viable interpretation.

TG: well obviously i knew the birds were just black screaming sky dongs just hear me out

TG: i kept dying

TG: there kept being these traps like i would go one way and get my head chopped off

TG: or go another way and get stabbed or whatever

TG: and every time i died the dream reset itself and i was standing there alive and ready to try to escape again

TG: but each time i would be watching myself from the vantage point of a different crow

TG: like i was the crow all squawking around in circles like a macabre flapping douche

TG: and i would always watch myself try to do something different to dodge the trap but i always ended up dead

TT: Hm.

TT: Well, if I've learned anything from my extensive skimming over the Wikipedia articles on dream analysis,

TT: It's that this dream is very unlikely to have any literal significance whatsoever.

TT: It's probably not about dying at all.

TG: you mean maybe its about anxiety over maintaining my blogs

TG: or that my beats might not be ill enough

TT: Yes. In fact, if you were on my couch that would have been my next question, as a licensed professional.

TT: "Mr. Strider, have you considered that what you actually dread is to have your urban rhythms exposed for what they truly are, which is, clinically speaking, just shy of 'da bomb'?"

TG: and then we crack up laughing cause we both know theyre fresher than your moms change of drawers and tighter than when shes wearin them

TT: Listening to you conjure imagery of my mother in her underpants is definitely keeping us buoyed high above this swirling Freudian hellhole.

TT: Well done.

TG: please its not like shes my mom i can visualize her choice ass all i want without it gettin much more than moderately uncomfortable for everyone involved

TT: What if you're wrong?

TG: about what

TT: Her not being your mother.

TG: uh

TT: Don't worry, you're probably safe. Luckily I can think of no literary or historical precedent for that sort of folly whatsoever.

TG: this isnt the first time youve insinuated were related what is up with that

TT: Isn't it?

TG: no

TG: i mean

TG: im not sure

TG: i feel like youve brought it up before which is kind of weird but now i dont know

TG: i think im getting this weird deja vu thing where i was sure we talked about this

TG: forget it

TT: Why don't you tell me more about your dream?

TG: ok

TG: so i kept dying and kept being crows and stuff

TG: and then i started to notice something coming from the sky

TG: it was this faint eerie singing and i look up and theres nothing there just darkness

TT: That's interesting.

TT: I've read about this.

TG: what did you read

TT: Certain texts say singing from the unknowable void carries a message.

TT: That its recipient has been selected for a mission of supreme cosmic importance, that will result in your death and that of billions more.

TT: But one that is essential to the perpetuation of existence itself.

TG: what the fuck sort of crackpot psychology text would say something like that

TT: It's not from a psychology text.

TG: so then youre consulting astrology books now

TT: Not astrology.

TT: More like,

TT: Zoology.

TG: oh my fucking god will you put that away

TT: Ok.

TT: Keep describing the dream, though.

TT: If the rest of it is incompatible with prognoses of the zoologically dubious, I will withdraw my insinuation.

TG: theres not even much more to it

TG: i looked up into the sky

TG: didnt see anyone singing

TG: but even though the sky was black i could see the sun

TG: it was bright as hell even through my shades

TG: so i flapped my wings and flew up away to it like a fucking piece of garbage

TG: and thats it

TT: This doesn't strike you as an impulse of self destruction?

TG: no

TG: not in the sense that it was a dark sacrificial zoology mission

TG: it was more like somewhere to go besides watching myself die a lot from the vantage of a feathery murder of dumb shitty birds

TT: So, if hypothetically you were to accept such a mission, or even insist upon one, it wouldn't be in the spirit of genuine sacrifice, but of escape?

TG: what the fuck are you talking about

TG: ok somethings wrong

TG: this whole conversation is falling apart this isnt how it originally went at all

TT: Aw. We were making good progress, too.

TT: Why did you have to go and remember?

TG: this happened months ago

TG: does this mean im dead

TT: What do you think?

TG: stop it

TG: this is so sick you using the dream bubble bullshit to pick apart my psyche

TG: am i dead or asleep

TT: If you're starting to remember, you should be able to tell me.

TG: god dammit

TT: Maybe I'm just as confused as you about it?

TG: yeah right

TT: Am I dead or asleep, Dave?

TG: i dont know

TT: Try to remember.

[lu9]

dumb vent from twitter (discussion of gender™ and labels Overall)

more things in the world should be "explained to (person) like they're 5"

cuz the more we just use Labels and shit in arguments and not Raw Ideas we get lost and confused because "How Dare this person not having read about this very specific thing or This Branch of the very specific thing"

i thought about this as i saw (ahem) keffals trending again and did the mistake of looking it up. boy twitter sure is healthy huh

but i just think why be an asshole to people not even doing anything harmful that's not an "enlightened centrist" thing right, its just basic decency, I Think, I Hope

this stuff about like transmed arguments, i see them and its like Who Hurt You. let people be fuckin happy theyre just Existing i promise not everyone is a Woke Mob Wamt's To Spread Propaganda And Fëtisch Real !! Hide Your Children's!!!1

then they toss buzzwords at each other like tankies, commies or whatever other general labels that Even So are not universally understood, and each person might even interpret it differently who cares at this point again, discuss Raw Ideas instead of assuming everyone knows what X or Y label means like its a zip file with the ideas inside but not everyone will know how to open it or what to do with the contents.

name calling could really only be useful for... clout

then you might say "well you're still using a label in some form or another" but I don't think we use them Alone just to validate some argument, when we use them we Know who we use them with lol. if the other person doesn't know what i'm even talking about i just don't use it. i'd imagine we mostly may use labels to identify ourselves so we can maybe try to find likeminded people i guess, while some may not even use said label at all even if they align with it (or not). and That's fine just like being trans SHOULD be fine for literally Anyone (in good faith - i believe thats like the Bare Minimum "requirement", nothing else, i mean why would you be trans in Bad Faith if not for Evil purposes)

what i am saying is, at least i try to make myself understandable

(hopefully all of this wasn't very confusing which would be ironic given everything i said but sorry im tired and Autism)

maybe you could say i'm the "i just wanna grill!!!" guy except actively against bigotry, just also against people being

Stupid

at each other, like when there are disagreements even Inside of LGBT+ like

shut the fuck up we're in this hell together

[jauffrejam]

@what-a-bastard

okay so this plot is between me and kaz @amulet-of-kings so im sure when he wakes up if he sees anything i got wrong or missed he will fill in. here's our character spread for oblivion, specifically. including martin. but not including my other guy bc he's not important to this explanation the only important thing is that the other guy was the daggerfall agent and ends up becoming the... arch mage thats it. also he was vokas mentor

amyra (ammy) nihil - imperial, archer (?), hero of kvatch, belongs to kaz

voka oakenthorn - bosmer, destruction mage (fire), not the hero of kvatch, belongs to me

martin septim - imperial, you know him

amyra and martin knew each other as children. i think amyra was... an orphan? i cannot remember a lot of amyra's backstory besides she and martin were friends as kids but separated and did not meet up again until they were adults. they are both in kvatch and like sleep together in a hayloft until theyre awoken in by the oblivion gate opening and then the pre-game kvatch stuff happens

voka and martin knew each other in the mages guild and did The Thing together that caused them to fall out Hard which voka took really hard because he kinda had a massive boner for martin. and he also leaves the mages guild and becomes a sad alcoholic. gets into a fight with the guy at the beginning of the game who taunts you because i just think itd be funny i completely retconned whatever reason he was in there for cuz i didnt even know he HAD a reason. anyways voka does the stupid thing and tries to use fire magic on a dunmer and burns down a tavern so he gets thrown in jail. cue beginning of oblivion

voka makes it to kvatch and helps everyone out. game progresses. despite not being the hok, voka kind of splits the role with ammy for the sake of things. they split up quests and stuff and over time both of them kind of like. fill in with martin on what happened while they were gone. and its kind of obvious that martins more into ammy which fuckin kills voka. vokas basically the mad third wheel ex who like. wants to move on but he just Cant.

martins sacrifice at the end pushes voka and ammy closer together for a brief time, but they just cant make it work. amyra ends up having martins baby and voka sticks around to help take care of the baby along with the blades. um. i literally dont know how to explain this next bit without saying canon elder scrolls does fucked up shit all the time. reyfa gets kidnapped through time to skyrim. like the game. reyfa is the kid by the way i love her so much i love ammy too. amyra also kind of fucks off to become sheogorath/ammygorath. and voka just kind of falls hard into bad habits so hard he becomes sanguine.

martin becomes akatosh, amyra becomes sheogorath, and voka becomes sanguine. and thats why i joked that martin couldve had paws but he chose another imperial lol