#thats a halsey lyric

[daydrinking75]

im just so fucking sad and scared all the time and its ruining my life

[lorenlily]

i never loved you is so incredible!!! 😭

[catinasink]

No tally hall!? Is there anything you do listen to? Crane wives? Satsw? Will wood?

Well, anyone other than tv girl? I know that's taking whats not yours in your bio.

[adanima]

your lips hang heavy underneath me

vegaspete moments that send me spiraling

[kashilascorner]

Spotify suggested me this and I almost cried listening to it wtf??

[shoulda-hit-the-tunnel]

Halsey live streamed TGI!

(OH! The great impersonator/The Girl Inside! I get it now. I dont spell well 🙃)

And it was Really interesting, and they basically answered all the questions my girlfriend and I had asked each other while listening to the album. 😅 (Oh! It was a metaphor...)

I took copious notes for her cause she had to sleep 🥰

It was so interesting! I had to sign up to the website but couldn't hear the tracks cause I have YT bloody music, instead of Fruit or We Sponsor jerk rogan-ify . But thats ok, I own 4 digital copies, now. I can play my own tracks. 😅 But it was really cool even if I did keep forgetting to press play at the same time as them 😝

If anyone is interested I can write up some of the cool things she said about the tracks ❤️ I got something about most tracks except Lucky cause I was listening too hard and forgot to write 😝

I really enjoyed it, it was so cool getting to know the answers to some of the very lyrics we argued over on our album play thru. I am excited to tell her about the tree and the body parts 😅😂

Also: 🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸🐸

[sugar-omi]

what are your general thoughts on step 3 baxter bc i was replaying OL1 and i trying hard not to cackle at the fact baxter is 19 years old in like 2016. bc all i can hear is halsey, p!atd, arctic monkeys when i look at him; it's giving tumblr, hot topic, that specific period of alt fashion. like he looks like a k-pop idol, but has a weirdly deep voice and overly formal way of speaking. like that is a rich sheltered gayboy emo nerd, not a suave daddy dom. his ass is grass and mc is gonna mow it. i'm saying i find his whole aesthetic ridiculous even tho i do have a soft spot for his fear of emotional vulnerability.

LMAOOO NO I READ THE HALSEY, P!ATD, N ARCTIC MONKEYS AND YOU LITERALLY DESCRIBED MY MUSIC TASTE IN 2016-18 PLS JUST ADD MCR AND I AM IN RUINS.....

OMG STOP "HIS ASS IS GRASS AND MC IS GONNA MOW IT" PLS I LOVE YOU YOUR /WORDS/ IM ACTUALLY CRYING

honestly the only reason i don't clown him is bc I think him being older is 🥵🫣 but yeah I had to laugh when they called me Pepe le pew and Victorian emo man

I was literally getting ready to go out the one day after playing the dlc, and was trying not to fuck up my eyeliner from laughing bc pepe le pew is abnormally funny n idek what or who that is

HONESTLY I WAS SO GRATEFUL WHEN HE CHANGED CLOTHES

I COULD GET BEHIND THE SHIRT BUT THOSE PANTS.....

take em off

OH NO WHAT DO YOU THINK HIS UNDERWEAR LOOKED LIKE.... ik in step 4 he had fall leaves on his butt but what abt step 3.... im afraid 😟

okay I totally almost forgot your question, thank god I read things like 5 times before I'm sure I'm not missing smth but general thoughts....

well first thoughts was "who tf is this flirting w my man🤨"

now it's "who let this vampire out the house" bc baxter is so pale... pls I feel like if I put a firefly on him he'd burn like?!)!&*!^!??

final thought: "are you still looking to be sandwiched" bc poly cove/baxter/mc sounds PERFECT for all my issues (will never recover from the dialogue being different if you have cove at fond or crush when you start dating baxter.....)

also I'd like to eat him, did I say that alrdy? well I'd like to shrink him n nibble on him

OH MY GOD THATS OFF TRACK OK STEP 3 BAXTER THO. ID LIKE TO GRAB HIS FACE N YELL AT HIM

knowing he's going to break my heart...... pls... 5 moments wasn't enough imma need reimbursement for this heartache

I wanna sneak into his condo and lay in bed w him and make him laugh until he falls asleep n then I wanna wake him up w breakfast and then I wanna go on a lil stargazing date n walk along the edge of the water, the water only touching his feet when the wave goes up shore

n I wanna find all his lil freckles and moles n count them n be all close n tell him he's pretty like the moon and I wanna put on some song idk the lyrics to bc it's some Spanish love song or smth and make him dance w me even tho the most I can do is spin I a circle and circle literally one hip

and I wanna take him on a long drive w his dumb metal music blasting n make him yell it out w me and I wanna feed him his dumb fries w pie or whatever it was and I wanna make him lay in the grass w me and I wanna go build a dumb sandcastle and get him a silly lil toy that's prbly meant for kids n giggle abt it for a stupid amount of time and when we get home laugh abt it some more and i wanna play my dumb instrument and sing him a dumb song n AKAJHAGA I JUST WANT A FUCKJNG COMING OF AGE MOVIE W HIM I AM JAGADFALAH LOSING MY SHIT

okay.

I'm normal 🧍 ... I like this man a Regular amount

[a-whispering-echo]

Dust playlist

because hes on my mind 24/7

Drugs, smoke and self-deprecation and 'lmao im psycho' kinda music

(he also has 'catholic-guilt' vibes to me, so...)

Teddy Hyde - Sex With A Ghost

twenty one pilots - Ride

twenty one pilots - The Judge

Imagine Dragons - Radioactive

Melanie Martinez - Mad Hatter

Lotta True Crime - Penelope Scott 

Lady Gaga - Bloody Mary

alt-J (∆) Breezeblocks

Ke$ha - Blow

Gang Of Youths - Achilles, Come Down

Rihanna - Disturbia - (Disturbia/Radioactive Mashup)

Entomologists - GHOST ( <;3 really this one fits him REALLY well!)

Penelope scott- Dead girls

Bebe Rexha - I'm Gonna Show You Crazy

Queen - Another One Bites The Dust (yes, really. Its not just here for the pun lmao) - Cover my Meltberry is great too!

Queen - Another One Bites The Dust

Sub Urban & Bella Poarch- INFERNO

Smoke and Mirrors - Cover by Lollia - (orig by - LittleJayneyCakes)

Ava Max -Sweet but Psycho

mia rodriguez - Psycho

Halsey - Gasoline

Bo Burnham - That Funny Feeling

Halsey - Control

Arctic Monkeys - Why'd You Only Call Me When You're High?

Mother Mother - Hayloft II 

Oh Klahoma - Jack Stauber

Gorillaz - Rhinestone Eyes

Hozier - Take Me To Church

Problems- Mother Mother

The Front Bottoms - Be Nice To Me

The Crane Wives - Pretty Little Things 

Ghost - Mary On A Cross

Penelope Scott - Sweet Hibiscus Tea

Give Heart Records-Ashes

The Front Bottoms - Twin Size Mattress (btw band au go brrr hehe)

Look Who's Inside Again by Bo Burnham - but special hehe (right, look; imagine ' the kid in the bedroom' is him in the genocide loops, 'he do anything to get out of them' but then the loops stop, and hes left all alone, and the beat drop is him realising 'thats it. Its over, im alone, and I'm never getting out.'

Lincoln - Saint Bernard

Billie Eilish - Bellyache

oh ana x jumpsuit | mother mother & twenty one pilots - clem turner

You're An Awful Person - R.I.P

K.Flay - High Enough

Queen - I'm Going Slightly Mad

melanie martinez -Milk and Cookies

Lovely - twenty one pilots 

twenty one pilots: Car Radio 

twenty one pilots- Kitchen Sink

Breaking Benjamin - I Will Not Bow

NEW DIVIDE - Linkin Park

twenty one pilots - Nico And The Niners 

twenty one pilots - Message Man

The Things I Deserve - GHOST

Alec Benjamin - Mind Is A Prison

KikuoHana - O Light

Apocalyptica feat. Brent Smith - Not Strong Enough

The Pixies - Where is my mind

Lil Soda Boi - "plug me in" 

Penelope Scott - Soap

AJR - Karma

Feel Good Inc. - Gorillaz

Stella Jang - Villain

Killer In The Mirror - Set it Off

I Don't Give A... - MISSIO

Na Na Na - My Chemical Romance

Daughtry - Traitor

Famous Last Words - My Chemical Romance

I'm Still Standing - Elton John

Glass Animals - Toes ( All I ever want, is just a little love - hehe, not just for that line, but yk)

Panic! At The Disco - Crazy = Genius 

iNSaNiTY- VocaCircus

Fish in a Birdcage - Fish in a Birdcage

syudou - Hebereke Junkie

Apocalyptica feat. Brent Smith - Not Strong Enough

ピノキオピー - 神っ (God-ish)

Call Boy - Miyashita Yuu but specifically THIS version

(I have translated english lyrics for the last two, so thats fun!)

ENHYPEN - 'Drunk-Dazed' (im gonna animates Something with this eventually)

[aropride]

i have been deeply appreciating ur TGI posting and was wondering what ur fave songs off of it are !! - mare

HI MARE im free from academia for the day (FINALLY) so i can answer this yayayaayy

as of right now. and this is in album order And im about to list off like a good third of the album sorry in advance but: only girl living in la, dog years, letter to god 1974, letter to god 1983, darwinism, lonely is the muse, and life of the spider

first of all. only girl living in la is an INSANE way to start an album. Like i knew i was absolutely in for it seeing the track list and that we were Starting with a 6 minute long song i was like Oh she loves me specifically she knew id been tormented by songs that are 2 minutes long for too long. i dont think ive ever finished the first song on an album and been, like, scared to listen to the rest of it before (good thing)

dog years. i canteven say anything yet Like theres no words. probably one of my favorites out of my favorites

letter to god 1974 and letter to god 1983 are twins to me. (well triplets shoutout letter to god 1998 no disrespect to my girl its just the first two are my faves personally) Thank u halsey for addressing the "wanting to get really sick so people would pay attention to you" to "getting really sick and it turns out people kinda dont gaf if ur in ur 20s about it" pipeline

hometown- is anyone else trying so hard to escape their hometown or is it just me and halsey and gerard "i know im never getting out of belleville" way. also i love her voice on this one

darwinism- i was reading it as being about physical disability but apparently she said it was about neurodivergence either way is anybody else feeling ostracized from the rest of society or is it just me and halsey out here

lonely is the muse- INSANE FUCKING SONG vocally lyrically musically everything. when i found out there was gonna be a Whole Album and lonely is the muse was on it i realized i was going to die.and then i did. <3

life of the spider- i knew there was a tori amos song on the album and the one tori amos song im really familiar with is me and a gun so of course i was terrified .and i was right to be. love a song i cant listen to without having a panic attack one of my favorite genres. insanely haunting song i cant really listen to this one casually yet or possibly ever i have to like sit down and prepare. this morning i saw a spider in my bathroom and started crying. tomorrow more of the same. "favorite" not in the way where i listen to it a lot favorite in the way where i can barely listen to it at all

also one more thing i feel like in general the album is organized very well does that make sense. like the songs are in a specific order that is good and makes sense. only girl living in la -> ego -> dog years -> letter to god 1974 is an insane run of songs generally let alone first on the album but also it like. makes sense why theyre in that order. also darwinism -> lonely is the muse -> arsonist -> life of the spider i can say the same of. like yeah thats the exact order those songs should go in. this is really not a Shuffling Album to me at ALL theres a specific order they all go in and i really like that Bc half the time These Days it feels like everythings so focused on having 2 minute long songs with 15 second clips that blow up on tiktok that its always nice to have an album thats like. Ok thankgod they actually give a fuck about this and its not optimized for social media analytics

thank u for reading My essay ^___^<3 u sent this 5 hours ago when i was working on my school stuff and i waslike oh thank god i get to talk about music later. A little treat for meeee to rewind and such.And then immediately i wrote A lot of sentences but, like, for fun this time so it counts as Rewinding

[himbos-hotline]

12, 16, and 23 for writers asks!! For any fic you want :)

What program(s) did you use to write and edit?

I use google docs to store my fics. I have an over 200 page google doc where all my wrestling request are so not only do I not loose them but I can track how many I write in a year! I just think its so cool! But for actually writing I use a program called stimuwrite

Talk about the fic’s biggest moment & how you came up with it

for a lot of my fics, the big moment is what I see in my brain, like a picture instead of words and I kinda, craft the story around it. Like the big part of the dead princess au is her standing outside kennys kitchen bifold doors in the rain and dobby hissing at her and kenny being confused at first and then lightning strikes and he swears he sees her [he does, cole wants kenny to go insane in his grief] but he pretends that he doesnt

How did you come up with the title?

I have certain songs that hit as fic titles, hozier or halsey lyrics or even mitski but if I have a character playlist on- I will title the fic first and then build the idea around the original title and then if my ideas change and the fic goes a different way, I try to find another song title that will fit. Othertimes its "I wanna write a fic thats title'd from *insert song here*"

[daydrinking75]

my skin feels loose and i wana pinch it between my fingers and cut it off

[snowisfallen]

Walls Could Talk

A shitty late night drabble about Coriolanus and Abigail and their toxic relationship inspired by the lyrics of Walls Could Talk by Halsey :)

warnings: toxic relationship, mentions of a physical fight,

PSA:yall in all seriousness, if ur partner lays a hand on you thats not okay ever, dont let toxic hot fictional blonde men convince u otherwise pls

A/N: uh if yall hate this or think its shitty im sorry :(

Been about three days and I'm comin' back I'm about four minutes from a heart attack And I think you make me a maniac But you don't know, oh

It had been three days since Abigail’s last exchange with Coriolanus Snow. a dangerous dance between passion and turbulence, left her teetering on the edge of emotional chaos. The toxic nature of their connection manifested in frequent conflicts, transforming arguments into battlegrounds where the lines between love and frustration blurred. The prolonged silence between their fights heightened her sense of unease, amplifying the feeling of insanity and stirring a storm of doubt within. But it had been three days, she missed his touch, and he had said sorry. So she came back to him even though she felt crazy for forgiving so easily.

Two years and we in between But we both been here since we 17

This relationship had been on and off for two years now, and right now she wasn't quite sure where they stood. Were they together again, were they not together again? She was sure that they were together but she knew she shouldn't just assume. They had been together since they were 17, she couldn't imagine life without him, even if it meant she had to put up with things she would never dare mention out loud to her friends.

Here we go, fist fight in a limousine But they don't know

The atmosphere inside the limousine took an unexpected turn when Abigail realized Coriolanus was already drunk. Tensions escalated when she confronted him, and what began as a disagreement morphed into a heated confrontation, which then turned into a tumultuous fistfight. The confined space of the luxurious vehicle intensified the emotional storm, with emotions reaching a boiling point. Bruised and emotionally drained, they arrived at the party, and before exiting the limousine, they both straightened up and put smiles on their faces, pretending the past 10 minutes hadn’t happened as they walked into the party, acting like the perfect couple that everyone thought they were.

And we both hope there's something But we bo-both keep fronting And it's a closed discussion

It was unspoken between the two of them that the relationship should have ended long ago, yet they couldn't help but hold on to a love that had already expired. It was an undiscussed topic, whether they should finally call it quits or not, Both continuing to pretend that this tumultuous relationship wasn't hurting them. 

And I'm thinking, "Damn, if these walls could talk" Well, they'd be like "Shit is crazy, right?" I ain't your baby no more

As she navigated the charade at the party, she couldn't shake the weight of the truth lingering in the walls of the limousine. If those walls could talk, they would unveil the heartbreaking narrative etched into their fabric—the whispers of passionate arguments, the echoes of painful turmoil, and the silent witness to a relationship veering into the realm of the inexplicable. In those moments of pretend normalcy, Abigail was acutely aware that the walls, had they possessed a voice, would have screamed the undeniable truth: that the version of love she clung to was fading, and the person she once knew as hers was slipping away. The limousine, a silent witness to their private struggles, seemed to embody the emotional distance that had grown between them. The unspoken revelation echoed in her mind, painting a stark picture of a relationship that had become more a theater of chaos than a sanctuary of love. She called it off that night.

Been about two weeks since you went away I'm about halfway through a Cabernet There I go, I'm wastin' a Saturday Sittin' at home

Two weeks after the breakup, Abigail found herself immersed in solitude, halfway through a bottle of Cabernet, as she spent her Saturday evening at home. The echoes of the past lingered in the air, and the quietude of her surroundings mirrored the emotional stillness within. She grappled with the residual emotions of the breakup, contemplating the significance of the choices made. Saturday, once a canvas for shared moments, now became a canvas for self-reflection, a necessary pause in the narrative of a relationship that had both shaped and tested her resilience.

Told my new roommate not to let you in But you're so damn good with a bobby pin Now you gon' play me like a violin Hittin' these notes

Abigail warned her new roommate against letting Coriolanus in, going so far as to even change the locks but her attempt was thwarted as he skillfully picked the lock with a bobby pin and infiltrated her space. In the face of his unexpected appearance, he began on a desperate plea, apologizing profusely and weaving a narrative that resonated with her vulnerabilities. His words, a carefully crafted symphony of remorse and promises, struck a chord that resonated with Abigail's yearning for resolution and connection. Despite her initial resolve, Coriolanus managed to utter the right words, tapping into the emotional undercurrents that still bound them. In a moment of vulnerability, she found herself swayed, uttering a hesitant "yes" that, for a fleeting moment, seemed to hold the promise of a renewed chapter, even as the shadows of their turbulent history loomed in the background.

And we both hope there's something But we bo-both keep fronting And it's a closed discussion And I'm thinking, "Damn, if these walls could talk" Well, they'd be like "Shit is crazy, right?" 

As they attempted one last time to rekindle the relationship, they engaged in a subtle game of emotional concealment, each afraid to expose the depth of their feelings. The subject of their connection remained a closed discussion, unspoken but palpable in the air between them. As they navigated this fragile moment, Abigail couldn't help but ponder the profound insights the walls of her space might share if they could speak. The unspoken truths, the untold desires, and the echoes of their shared history reverberated within the confines of the room, creating an unspoken tension that lingered like a silent conversation, waiting for the right moment to be unveiled. She couldn't escape the unspoken messages she imagined the walls would convey. If only they could talk, they might whisper a stark truth she was hesitant to fully embrace – "That ain't your baby no more." The walls, silent witnesses to the tumultuous journey of her relationship with Coriolanus, seemed to echo the sentiment that the connection, once so intimately entwined, had now slipped through her grasp. The phrase lingered in the air, a haunting reminder of the transformative power of time and the irreversible changes that had reshaped the contours of their shared history. In the quietude of her thoughts, Abigail grappled with the weight of those unsaid words, questioning the nature of her evolving relationship and the path she was reluctantly navigating.

I ain't your baby no more  Hey! No more I ain't your baby no more

Abigail arrived at a poignant realization that resonated with the unspoken truths hanging in the air. No more, he wasn't hers anymore. The weight of that acknowledgment settled in her heart, carrying the bittersweet resonance of letting go. The walls, if they could articulate her sentiments, would echo the profound shift in the dynamics of their connection. In that moment of clarity, Abigail confronted the stark reality that the ties binding them had frayed irreversibly. The words lingered in her thoughts, a sobering admission that marked the beginning of a new chapter—a chapter where she grappled with the echoes of what once was, while navigating the uncharted territory of a future without him as hers.

[matoitech]

6. three songs you wish you could erase from history (because they're terrible)

this was actually really hard since im not like actively remembering songs i hate i just know what i'd change if i heard it on the radio lol. i decided to go with sillier more personal options rather than songs that just suck total ass, like blurred lines or something, or taylor swifts discography (thats just too easy). anyway heres my picks: flowers by miley cyrus (sorry im happy for her that she won a grammy or whatever but i really hate that song), break my face by ajr (metal title with terrible lyrics, its not like offensive or something i just got baited with a cool title and it still disappoints me), colors by halsey (erase the leoparstar x tigerstar warrior cat animatics to it please)

[luwukass]

lukes favs! november 2023

music (according to my spotify stats, in order of most to least streamed average top 10) songs: i know places (taylors version), slut!, is it over now?, tolerate it, cowboy like me, one of your girls, now that we dont talk, clean (taylors version), out of the woods (taylors version) and mirrorball (long pond studio session) albums: 1989 (taylors version), evermore, folklore, red (taylors version), speak now (taylors version), lover, fearless (taylors version), midnights, folklore (long pond studio) and reputation. artists: as i said last month bc i listen to a lot of taylor the other stats can be changed it i listen to the artist like twice so this month im only including the relevant ones. taylor swift, halsey, conan gray, troye sivan and post malone.

media podcasts: podcasts were the same as last month! if you need a reminder they were gals and goblins which is a dnd podcast im really enjoying and swiftlit made by tumblrs own @kingofmyborrowedheart the taylor swift podcast thats deep dives into taylors lyrics! shows: i honestly wasn't in the mood to watch much tv this month the shows i did watch were the boys, loki s2, and i watched the dr who special with my polycule so theyre making me watch the specials with them and the normal series. shows: i honestly didnt watch much tv this month i watching a little bit more of the boys and loki s2 and i watched the dr who special with my polycule so now im being forced to watch the specials and the normal show movies: most of my movies ive watched this month were on weekly polycule movie nights which this month were, the fnaf movie, now you see me and now you see me two, everything everywhere all at once (rewatch), lilo and stitch (rewatch) and we also did some special events so i finally watch all three of the lord of the rings movies and we rewatched all of the hunger games movies (except for the prequel) comics: so as last month i kept up to date with my favs which again are, everything is fine by birchall, lovebot by chase keels and miranda mundt, ingrid the plauge doctor by harry amoros, hyperfocus by kip trevor i also started two new comics! i started and finished night owls and summer skies by TIKKLIL and its currently being update but im caught up on RAINBOW! by angel and sunny gloom books: i didn't read this month :( games: i yet again played a bunch of minecraft, i also did some jackbox game nights with my polycule and i attempted to play some lethal company but my laptop kept crashing bc it is crap (not a game issue at all it is a me issue) as always lmk if yall have any suggestions for anything!! im really trying to branch out with stuff so dont be afraid to send an ask!

also if you started following me this month im trying to make this a monthly thing so here are my october favs!

[lulugothuwu]

So I'm going to kill 2 birds with one stone because I dont know how to do this Tumblr bio stuff and I want to post song lyrics. I'm going to make a pinned post that is just lyrics from songs I think fit me or are just a mood.

"Tell me your secrets, I won't keep them. Is that so bad? Thats right I'm 𝓈𝑒𝓁𝒻𝒾𝓈𝒽 and I know it drives you so mad!" [Selfish Remix; Kira, Ruby] "I'm a 𝔴𝔞𝔫𝔡𝔢𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔰, I'm a 𝔬𝔫𝔢 𝔫𝔦𝔤𝔥𝔱 𝔰𝔱𝔞𝔫𝔡. Don't belong to no 𝔠𝔦𝔱𝔶, don't belong to no 𝔪𝔞𝔫. I'm the 𝔳𝔦𝔬𝔩𝔢𝔫𝔠𝔢 in the pouring 𝔯𝔞𝔦𝔫, I'm a 𝖍𝖚𝖗𝖗𝖎𝖈𝖆𝖓𝖊" [Hurricane; Halsey] "怒らないで見捨てないで どこもいかないで (ねえ). 強く絞める吐くまで絞める　人がいないいないと...愛して　愛して　愛して　もっともっと! 愛して　愛して　狂おしいほどに!" [Aishite, Aishite, Aishite /Love me, Love me, Love Me; Kikou] ["Don’t get angry. Don’t abandon me. Don’t go anywhere. (Hey.) It strangles me tightly, til I could throw up, whenever no one's around...Love me, Love me, Love me, more and more. Love me, Love me, so much that its maddening."]

[r0ttensunf]

ive heard closer when i was 10 years old, i wanted to sing it with my best friends in a school talent show... that was the first time that ive decided to take a "professional" take on an art project. some time later ive listened to eastside and that song caried me through 2018 wich was one of the most traumatic years of my life, i was fouding out about my bisexuality in a toxic household and toxic classroom in school had no one there for me but then i found out about you for real. Ive listened to strangers cause i knew lauren jauregui but something about you were diferent. I saw some videos about you instantly feel for your beauty (like a 12 yearold who just undertood she liked girls would) and as time passed your music stuck with me more and more. in 2019 i created fan accounts to post edits fanarts all of that for you i developed so much of my editting and desing and ilustration skills consuming your music. In the pandemic your album Manic changed everything for me. i was in my most depressive fase, stuck in my home with a mother who didnt knew how to deal with her daughters feelings and a dad who seam to not care. my mom would scream at me for crying to loud and for not beeing able to get out of bed to shower but hearing your music made me wipe my tears and smile. ive always had a troubled relationship with the idea of motherhood, i kinda still do, but when you annouced that you were pregnant it was the start of a change of vision for me making me see how trully beautiful beeing a mother can be. then iichliwp came out and what a piece of masterpiece that album is. within your whole discography every word you say seems to echo inside my chest following each beat. your lyrics been nailed in my bones since that first time i heard your voice in closer when i was 10. eventho i became a fan in 2018, those almost 6 years having you as a part of my life were lifechangimg. after my parents divorced i became closer to my dad because he would ask to listen to your songs with me in the car, last year he took me to your concert in sao paulo. Because of you im able now to see that motherhood doesnt have to be exaustimg and clonficted. because of you ive learned to not listen to shit about my gender, my sexuality and mostly about how i decide i want to be. Now, youre back realeasing the most vulnerable songs in your career and all i wanted more then ever was to give you the tightest hug. ive went to sleep hugging my pillow so many times wishing one day id be able to feel your arms around me to comfort me. But eventho my life is a mess now with the transition from adolence and adulthood with me becoming 18 this year, right now all i wanted was to give you a hug so i could confort you. i know i dont know you, but thats one of the prettiest parts, how youre able to make me the happiest girl in the world without even trading words with me. how youre able to get this part of me that no one else in the world can. ive liked other artists before, but as ive been growing up none of them stayed as strong as you do. when the end came out i skip school cause i couldnt stop crying. i was so scared of losing you. i cried the whole day and guess what? my dad was the first person to confort me, the same that who seemed to not care before you. im still so scared of losing you. Not just for me, but you have such a beautiful son, friends who love you and other fans who also care so deeply for you. ive cryied not only cause youre halsey, but also just as a person who has been through such a dificult battle all those years. we still know so little, but i cant express to you enough how deeply i care about you. im sorry if there were people who made you not belive in those words anymore, but for me i can asure you ill be here for your music, your art, your truth. youre so strong please know that there are milions of people out there who are proud of you. i cant even imagine how hard it must be not only to deal with health issues like this but also now publically. gosh i just wished i could do something.

My own fans are hands down meaner to me than any other people on the planet. Not speaking for all of you, of course. But it used to be just a minority that were awful to me and now it seems like a majority have only stuck around to chime in occasionally with their opinion of how much they hate me or how awful I am. it’s hard to want to engage in a space that is completely devoid of any kindness, sympathy, patience; or to be honest human decency. Especially after years of hiding from the interactions for fear that this EXACT thing would happen. I don’t know man. I almost lost my life. I am not gonna do anything that doesn’t make me happy anymore. I can’t spiritually afford it.

When I got sick all I could think about was getting better so I could come back and be a part of THIS again, but I don’t even know what *this* is anymore and I want to crawl in a hole and I regret coming back.