#that's some peppa pig shit

[its-actually-withered]

I would be the last to claim myself as a girl's girl, I can barely stand myself, but Phoebe Green?? Irritating bruh, the way she whispered to Mulder "She doesn't like me" about Scully? Bitch, I'll cut you

[lady-lycany]

May I present to you: The Wlof

[starrierknight]

why do british people moan with an american accent

[lazaruspiss]

People know that the whole "don't portray [harmful action] because viewers might recreate it" thing is a rule for children's shows right? It's supposed to be shit like "don't show peppa pig playing with fire so we don't get sued if a kid watches it and burns their house down." Not like, fanfiction for adults.

Edit: this was me venting about fandom cops. not me making some nuanced hot take. don't be weird in my comments.

Edit 2: turning off notifications. PSA: do not use pet names for strangers, especially not without asking. it's creepy.

[ppfw-out-of-context]

[ghostofbambifanfiction]

CYOA

You know what screw it, I wanted to finish chapter 59 today but I feel horrible and it's just not going to happen so for now you can have this completed scene under the cut with my great affection love love peace peace feel free to react as it'll make me happy etc. etc.

Private WhatsApp Chat Resumed: Friday 18th March, 2022, 07:57 Members: Lily Evans, James Potter

================================

James Potter: i think it's pretty amazing that you and beatrice know the exact date that you first met when you were two

Lily Evans: Lollllll Hello to you too

James Potter: although idk how sirius would react if we knew and i suggested celebrating that hello, also beautiful hello beautiful is what i meant to say

Lily Evans: Suave of you.

James Potter: i'm only just having my first coffee of the day, alright? give me five minutes and i'll be on my game

Lily Evans: I suppose I can allow you five minutes. We didn't always know, but my mum's been journaling every day for most of her life, so a few years back we did a little detective work and it turns out she'd written about my first day at Little Tots. We've done something for our anniversary every year since, but she's blown my gift out of the water this time around.

James Potter: why, what was your gift?

Lily Evans: I bought her a ladyship. She's Lady Beatrice Booth now. Officially. Incredibly it only costs £30 and you get a tiny plot of land in Cumbria with it. I gave the pack to her housemate to leave out today so she'll get a huge kick out of it when she gets home later.

James Potter: how ironic is it that you got her a ladyship and i was looking into getting her canonised earlier

Lily Evans: Lol why?

James Potter: because i really really really liked that video, evans

Lily Evans: I see. I see. I see. Not embarrassed about you having seen that AT ALL. Although I suppose I don't have a right to be embarrassed when I've seen all of your childhood photos, do I? It was probably about time that you saw some of mine.

James Potter: what would you have to be embarrassed about? you were an adorable child i loved watching you grow up on an instagram reel with, inexplicably, flo rida's musical accompaniment

Lily Evans: Lollllllllll I know that probably seems like a weird choice, but it was our go-to dance song when we were eighteen. And on that note, I was a very awkward teenager, as you've now seen.

James Potter: almost everyone on earth was an awkward teenager and the ones who weren't awkward peaked in their teens, so think of how they've suffered since then although i guess sirius is the exception anyway you say you were awkward, but fifteen year old me would have been DESPERATE for fifteen year old you's attention

Lily Evans: Oh, you say that now.

James Potter: no i would have been and i wouldn't have gotten it because as we've previously established i was a prick when i was fifteen so if i'd gone to school with you i still would have been a prick, but a prick who wanted your attention and did all manner of stupid things to get it i would have driven you mad

Lily Evans: Twenty-seven year old you wants my attention and I've not been driven mad over it once, to be fair.

James Potter: twenty-seven year old me has much improved with age and is more deserving of it you however have been a delight your whole life which i now have visual proof of hence i'll be calling your best mate saint lady beatrice from now on

Lily Evans: I wasn't a delight my whole life, I promise you. As a child I was a precocious little shit who thought she knew everything and couldn't be told otherwise. That's why I got into so many scrapes, doing stupid, dangerous things because I couldn't just listen to my mother when she told me "no, Lily, that's dangerous." I was like a working class Peppa Pig, honestly, no wonder my sister couldn't hack being around me half the time. So you're not the only one who has much improved with age. And fifteen year old me would have had a massive crush on fifteen year old you, BELIEVE me.

James Potter: oh really?

Lily Evans: Would I have let you know about it? Absolutely not. But it still would have been there.

James Potter: you mean like the crush you've had on me this whole time?

Lily Evans: I already have to get you back for some nonsense you pulled yesterday, Potter, so I'd advise you not to pile on and add this to the list.

James Potter: lollllllll

Lily Evans: I'm serious!

James Potter: oh i'm sure you are to which i say go on then do it

Lily Evans: I will do it.

James Potter: you go right ahead i can handle it

Lily Evans: You're being very cocky right now and while I can't pretend I don't like it, it'll also prove to be your downfall later.

James Potter: we'll see, we'll see

Lily Evans: We will see.

James Potter: whatever you need to tell yourself, sweetheart

Lily Evans: I think the fifteen year old you has taken over the controls in your head, mate.

James Potter: he probably has, yeah but what can i say he's really chuffed about your crush on me

Lily Evans: You mean the crush you've decided I have that I haven't confirmed?

James Potter: right, yeah, of course, clearly i'm the one in the wrong here still sleeping in my bed, are you?

Lily Evans: I have to go do a work thing now.

James Potter: oh, sure, that old excuse

[rileyslibrary]

How about this: After some especially rough missions, Ghost is on edge, his mental health hanging by a thread. Of course he doesn't admit it and powers through training and everything, but everyone knows he needs help, something to balance him out again.

Even the doctors are on their wits ends with him at this point, so they try a new approach and assign him to some animal assisted therapy. OF COURSE he hates the idea - waste of time and he is fine anyway...

So reader and their animal are invited to base to try and help him. (Or reader is the team mate, and the therapist an additional character - how ever, you know best.) I'll leave to you which animal it will be. ;-)

Ghost & Peppa (the dog)

Anon, hold my purse while I fill this with warnings:

Brief mentions of war

Mentions of physical & emotional trauma

This story is purely fictional and should not be considered an accurate representation of the practices and/or effects of Animal-Assisted Therapy

I did NOT cry while writing this. I’m fine.

——————————————————————

He’s fine. Of course, he is.

Nothing wrong with collecting mutilated bodies after a bomb explosion—It’s part of the job.

What about him getting shot? Ah well, it got him on his shoulder—that doesn’t count. It wasn’t life-threatening, according to him. He was fine.

He had to talk to someone. You all tried to pass the idea to him. Everyone except Gaz, who didn’t want to get involved since he, too, was going through some shit.

Soap told him straight away. “Mate, you need to talk to somebody”.

“I got nothing to say”, was his response.

Price was more subtle. Such a tactful guy, your captain. He tried to bring the subject up by sharing his own therapy experiences.

“Opening up and feeling vulnerable was difficult,” he said, “but I pushed through.”

But all he received was a shrug and a stern “glad it worked out for you. I’m fine.”

And you? You tried to cheer him up, calm him down, make him talk.

Nothing.

For the past two months, he has been training daily, hitting that punchbag and bench pressing like a maniac. He was pushing his physical limits, attempting to lift barbells equal to his weight, and you were looking at a person struggling to lift the weight of his conscience.

But he was fine.

Until Gaz came one day and pitched an idea to the captain: “Animal-assisted therapy” they called it. The doctors assigned it to him, and it helped. So, why not give it a try with Ghost?

The lieutenant hated the idea. Hated it. Why? Because “it was pointless and stupid” to him.

Plus, he was fine.

But Price placed his thumbs under his shoulder straps and told him it was an order. And nobody messed with the captain when he put his thumbs under his shoulder straps.

The therapist arrived the following week with Peppa, the dog.

“Peppa, like the pig?”

That was Ghost’s first question. And upon the therapist’s first nod, the follow-up question came.

“Why the fuck would you name the dog Peppa?”

The therapist explained that Peppa’s first patient was a little girl who struggled with anxiety. She named her Peppa after the cartoon character, and the name stuck.

Days turned into weeks, and although he initially protested against the therapy sessions, he was now willingly participating in them. Almost looking forward to them.

“Can’t come to training today; got a meeting with Peppa.” He would say.

Such compliance? From Ghost? How?

You all reached a conclusion because you needed an explanation that could make sense—Ghost wasn’t engaging with the therapist as much; he was opening up to the dog.

Peppa became his silent confidante.

He was playing with her and scolding her for eating too fast. Sometimes, he would ask her “why she was so sad” or “so devious” and why she was always drooling. In response, Peppa would just whine, wiggle her tail, or tilt her head, and Ghost would interpret her reactions as he pleased.

Although you could all see the improvement in his demeanour, you still worried about his well-being.

But whenever you asked him how he was, his response remained the same.

He was fine.

You tried to shift the focus and ask how the therapy was going instead. Yet, Ghost would still cling to his standard response.

Fine.

And then, the therapist advised to do something else instead.

“Ask him how Peppa is doing.”

And that simple question, about the dog’s well-being, unveiled the hidden side of his emotions. He would open up, and recount how Peppa was feeling a bit down one day, seemed too scared another day, or ate very little. He projected his own feelings and experiences onto the dog. He used her as a vessel to express his inner turmoil, revealing his struggles in a way that felt more comfortable and less vulnerable to him.

After all, it was the dog’s struggles, not his own.

He was fine.

“Do you think Peppa gets a payslip every month?” you joked one day as you looked at Peppa lying next to Ghost. “For having a job and all?”

“Peppa was a stray, you know; she always fought to survive.” he replied, kissing her head, “poor thing.”

“Poor thing,” you repeated, this time looking at him.

He knew he wasn’t fine. You all knew.

But Peppa didn’t pressure him to do or say anything.

She wouldn’t urge him to “talk to somebody” or “try meditation.”

She would insinuate, in her own way, that she was there for him.

Looking at him with her tongue out and a wide smile across her face.

Whining and demanding more pets.

Giving him the ball so they can play fetch.

Reminding him that caring for himself was just as important as those gentle scratches behind her ear.

“We’re in this together, human—you will be fine.”

——————————————————————

[autistook]

How would the fellowship spend a day at a shopping mall? I've been thinking about this for far to much time, and I want someone else's thoughts.

FELLOWSHIP AT THE MALL

Frodo: Goes to a small tea shop and spends the whole time there, because he can't make up his mind.

Sam: Follows Frodo like a puppy, until he spots a gardening shop and buys like every possible useful tool. Glances at Merry and Pippin's activities and rolls his eyes.

Merry & Pippin: Use the tiny carousel for kids, running to ask Aragorn, Gandalf and Boromir for more coins to put in it because they are high as hell and having the time of their lives. Probably go eat junk food for cravings and most likely Pippin goes to run around a comic book store, while Merry goes to a book store to buy a stack of complex and informative books. Pippin has ice cream and accidentally drops it on the floor of a toy store, because he went there for fun.

Boromir: Mostly just sips coffee and chit chats Aragorn, keeping an eye on Pippin.

Gandalf: Spends his time groaning at high Pippin. Maybe goes to see a 3D-movie and eats popcorn with a large smirk on his face. Also goes to a book store, but avoids Merry at all costs, accidentally ending up in the toddler book section - and he sits down to read Peppa Pig or some shit - and accidentally reads the whole series because "wow how will this continue?"

Aragorn: Coffee with Boromir, keeping his eye on both Pippin and Merry. Keeps Pippin running errands for him in his hyperactive, high state. Boromir lifts an eyebrow at his schemes, to which Aragorn just shrugs his shoulders and sips his cappucino with a smug smirk.

Legolas: Wanders around body shop, smelling all the different shower gels, body creams and what not, trying all the testers and eating some, confusing the people working there. Does this for HOURS. Probably tries all sorts of donuts if there's a cafe that has them, and buys a lot of weird ass clothes for the fellowship because "wow, x would love this." Buys himself a lacy, oversized bra because he is curious. Gives it to Gimli at home.

Gimli: When he is not carrying all of Legolas' shopping bags and rolling his eyes, he can be found listening to Gandalf reading Peppa Pig - and he is so fucking into it.

Bill the Pony: Didn't get inside, even though Merry and Pippin tried to put a trench coat, sunglasses and a fedora on him as a disguise.

Thank you for this ask LMAO

[mortalityplays]

sometimes I get so caught up in the giddiness of posting online with my friends that I do forget I'm on stage in the stickiest comedy basement in the worst art college town in some nebulous american state I've never visited and thousands of people are watching.

this gets to be a particular problem because most of the funniest and most interesting posters on this website have like 25 followers and are in it purely for the love of the art form, and a single reblog effectively blasts them with a firehose of people tagging their shit #that's my queue #gregory berrycone #not peppa pig #me if I'd posted this. I have smashed some butterflies in my time.

[pjsk-headcanons]

WxS & polysho hc's! (Some of these may be just me self-projecting, you may never know~)

Tsukasa has an unreal amount of part-time jobs and side hustles. When he ever gets sick, it becomes like the peppa pig episode where Miss Rabbit was unavailable and everyone had to scramble to cover for her. They're all left wondering the next day how is he able to pull that off.

Rui is fascinated by psychology, to the point he analyses every thought and pattern that appears in his brain. When he began to feel attracted towards his troupe, he just went "That's cool. I think i'm experiencing Romantic Attraction. I've always wondered what that felt like" and moved on with his day.

WxS have an unreal amount of bits and inside jokes only they understand. When Saki peeks over at Tsukasa's phone, she can't understand shit because it's just the word "albatross" or something like that being sent over and over in the WxS groupchat and everyone acts like this is funny.

Emu has absolutely 0 reaction to watching horror movies. Her partners, however, do not, so she rarely watches them.

Tsukasa is very concious of the health and well-being of his troupe members. He keeps reminding them to drink water, eat healthy and sleep well. He also carries a first-aid kit, a spare pair of noise-cancelling headphones for Nene and whatever else they might need with him.

Rui has gifted kid syndrome. He has never studied for a test in his life, not necessarily because he doesn't need to, but because he never learned how.

Nene has never drunk anything apart from water, juice, tea and coffee. No cola, pepsi, fanta, sprite, 7up or anything like that. She never felt the need to when she was younger, and now just enjoys how freaked out people are by this.

not from WxS, but i just know Ena has gone on a giant angry rant about the existence of AI art in vc more than once.

Adding to this, Emu was terrified when she first heard about generative AI. She still gets nightmares about it sometimes.

Rui tried drugs once out of curiosity. 'For science', he said, he just wanted to know how does it feel. Tsukasa lost his shit when he learned about it, and Rui never did it again.

~ 🍔

.

[kankrilicious69]

Hi sorry I just found lovetrace’s blog and they’re getting harassed for saying that watching shows for adults is good to do sometimes cause it broadens your horizons. which in of itself is a very tumblr thing to get mad at someone for. People going “well then smartypants, recommend me GOOD adult shows, since your the expert in shows for adults” as if thats some sort of gotcha to being told that watching shows for grownups is ok to do is so so so so funny im sorry.

anyways heres a list of 30 adult cartoon series, no movies and no live action shows. Just cartoon series. These are all of varying quality, and though i do personally enjoy all of the shows listed, I'd honestly recommend watching some lower quality/lower brow shows every once and a while. helps keep your standards reasonable, keeps the brainworms at bay.

teenage euthanasia (2021), superjail (2007), bojack horseman (2014), lazor wulf (2019), the oblongs (2001), china, il (2011), love, death, and robots (2019), gary and his demons (2018), the boondocks (2005), archer (2009), aqua teen hunger force (2000), supermansion (2015), harvey birman, attorney at law (2000), tuca and bertie (2019), the shivering truth (2018), digman! (2023), the midnight gospel (2020), inside job (2021), smiling friends (2022), central park (2021), the venture bros (2003), king of the hill (1997), ballmastrz 9009 (2018), clone high (2002), metalocalypse (2006), mr pickels (2013), primal (2019), mission hill (1999), moral orel (2005), xavier renegade angel (2007)

anyways, cartoons are good we all love watching cartoons, but theres no such thing as too much variety! try some other age ranges/genres every once in a while ( ´͈ ॢꇴ  `͈)੭ु

why are you doing a bunch of question marks at me when im just asking for suggestions do you not even have suggestions? Good adult media please list some that you believe are good. I don’t need you to tell me what I will think is good im asking your opinions.

bro I am not a resource??? there is so much media out there wgat??? do u like action? Drama? Mystery? Romance? theres media that’s for all ages it’s not a one size fits all type of thing

[dimetrodone]

I fear to ask, but I will anyway. What is your opinion on the Paw Patrol movies (if you've dared to see them). Obviously story-wise they're nothing, but I think it's interesting they exist at all, considering how low budget and low effort the show itself is. It's not /surprising/ that they got made considering how popular Paw Patrol is, but I do think it's funny that they were basically forced to make an effort if they wanted taxpaying adults to see it in theaters. It's like if someone flung 30 mil at a Peppa Pig cinematic universe.

I have only seen the first one and a TV movie, have yet to see Paw Patrol: The Mighty Movie (a different film then Paw Patrol: The Movie)

I should know better, since kid shows that are just 20 minute toy commercials is nothing new, but it somehow took me watching these to realize how much Paw Patrol is a shameless toy commercial. I think I was expecting there to be some loose attempt at being educational with how young the target demographic is, but nah these really are just commercials for 4 year olds that run over an hour and given theatrical runs. I can’t really complain about kids these days cause I had my own slop as a kid, my mom had to watch The Digimon movie in theatres..

Fascinated by how much the franchise and society at large doesn’t give a shit about these two puppies. They are expendable compared to the other puppies who fill the important roles of Cop, mandatory second guy that makes red/blue contrast with main, the girl one, and the one that eats, and the furlesss bipedal one.

[gizmo-parade]

A list of all the CRED flavors in the new South Park Special

I might miss some but here are the ones I was able to find

Summer Popsicle

Kiwi Lime

Maximum Raspberry

Cherry Bubblegum

Gooble Grape

Mega Lime

Mango Tango

(Tolkien literally dipped his fries in that shit wtf)

Bubblegum Grape

Purple Snowglobe

Watermelon Strawberry

(Idk why but there's two different variations)

Fireworks

Candy Wandy Gummy Yums

Jungle Punch

Super Energy

Slay Lemonade

Oatmeal Nummy Nums

Moonrise Mellow

Mega CRED

Peppa Pig Peppermint

Big Boy Blueberry

Super Galaxy

JellyRoll Midnight Waffle House

[dykefoolish]

qsmp fans who hate conflict in the lore go watch peppa pig or some shit since obviously you are too immature to handle complex stories and characters

[sleepybabybees]

Just some silly things- (mostly tiktoks I've got or conversations I've had-)

Gaz, soap, and ghost being silly drawing Peppa pig on Price's whiteboard in his office

(Based on a conversation I had)

Gaz: we're so artistic..now it can't smile-

Soap: did you just call me autistic??

Gaz: no- I said artistic- *trying not to laugh too loud*

Ghost: ah yes the demon incentive has no mouth-

------

Gaz played genshin impact for the first time...

Gaz: I have no idea what's going on in this quest- Furina, the archon, is being accused of being a fake- but the traveller ,who is as mute as the roach under my bed, is speaking like actually speaking...with his voice- I dont know what's happening anymore-

----

The 141 and laswell reading comments on booktok videos during their break

Gaz: "crawl to me" rhys I love you- but what-

Price: is she stuck or something??

Soap: negative...she's simply obeying her commander-

Ghost: are we really doing this-?

Roach signing: I wanna go home-

Soap: "whatever you read I will do to you when we get home" brother eugh-

Gaz: holy shit- i dont think I want that-

Price: what does this do to benefit us-?

Ghost: expell some of the impending dread and trauma weighing down on us apparently-

Roach signing: causing more of it more like-

Price relenting: "the beast inside my chest snarled again" I'm sorry- but you should get that checked-

Soap choking on his coffee

Gaz hunched over laughing: I can't breatheeeee-

Ghost: what in the eye of the tiger-

Roach signing; do people really like this-?

Laswell reading over John's shoulder; "I own you my little pet" hell nah-

Ghost snickering to himself: no man has more balls than you laswell

Gaz: amen

Soap: so true

Roach nodding along

Laswell: damn straight, boys.

Ghost finally giving in: "You like that don't you" I would like you to never speak to me again-

Soap and gaz wheezing on the ground

Price: thats enough now- Gary looks traumatised-

Laswell: what happened to that wall that was around...

Roach: Haunting Adeline - I think I would snap my own neck...

Everyone in the room staring at roach: ...

Roach smiling innocently

----

Ghost: it's always if if if-

Ghost: if my mom had balls she'd be my dad-

Soap laughing softly out of concern: uh-huh

----

Ghost watching gaz play genshin just to commentate

Npc: can't you see I'm on a break kid, scram.

Ghost: yeah, we all stand in a fucking thunderstorm for our breaks...Jack wagon.

Npc: but my hands..they're not steady

Ghost: because you have fucking hypothermia from standing in a fucking thunderstorm for an hour and a half!

Gaz losing it and hitting his desk whilst crying with laughter

[olderthannetfic]

the youtuber colleen ballinger was exposed for being inappropriate with kids and for grooming them, and i'm already seeing so many people write "it's weird that she was producing content for kids, right??? should've known the moment she started producing content for kids!!!! normal, non-predatory adults don't do that!!!"

and i just wish these people could sit the fuck down for a moment and realize that, unless we change labor laws that make it impossible for minors to own businesses and work full time jobs, NO SHOW IN THE WORLD, NO MATTER IF ITS AUDIENCE IS KIDS, WILL BE PRODUCED BY SOMEONE WHO IS NOT AN ADULT.

ALL SHOWS IN THE WORLD ARE PRODUCED BY ADULTS. CHILDREN SHOULDN'T HAVE TO WORK, NOT EVEN AS CONTENT CREATORS.

yes, even bluey and peppa pig and steven universe and whatever other show will be over analyzed by adults who are way too attached to children's media and will be titled some stupid shit like "blussy bleau the magical tortoise."

of all the reasons to get mad at that woman, and y'all are picking the only one that's not the issue???

--