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#that would just make my day lol /gen
kiwisandpearls · 23 days
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Funny thing is the most used song for the anti piracy ads was pirated.
That's like a thief telling you that stealing is bad
wait seriously?! If true that is funny as hell lol
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the-eclectic-wonderer · 3 months
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A big thanks to @witchybitchybisexual who tagged me in this amazing 30-questions Golden Girls-themed game; I had a *great* time answering these! I look forward to reading everyone's answers (including yours, @witchybitchybisexual!).
I'm hiding all questions after #1 under a cut, because this got long haha!
1. How did you find out about the show?
Via another show I love -- Good Omens! Or, actually, via the amazing book that inspired it. One of the main characters, the demon Crowley, is a big fan of The Golden Girls; there's a great scene in which the forces of hell hijack one of Rose's monologues to send him a message while he's watching the show! I was in need of something new to watch at the time, and I figured if Crowley liked it so much, it was at least worth checking out. :)
2. One storyline you’d eliminate?
Hmm... probably Miles' witness protection program storyline? I don't mind it that much (it gave us some fun jokes and some memorable scenes!), but I feel like that was a turning point in Miles' character, and I just don't like the person he became after that turning point.
There was no question 3 here, so I made up my own! Hope that's not an issue :)
3. Best guest star/character?
Lynnie Greene takes the cake as the best guest star, for sure. I adore her and she played a phenomenal young!Dorothy. The second place goes to Dick Van Dyke, just because I love him in general!
As for the best guest character, I think the honour goes to Angela, Sophia's sister! She's absolutely hilarious and her comedic chemistry with Sophia is stellar. I also have to mention John Neretti from S6E23 What A Difference A Date Makes for being the best man in the series imho.
4. Character you most relate to?
Dorothy! My personality nowadays is a bit of a mix between Dorothy and Rose, I feel, but the Dorothy side is prevalent (and it was even more prevalent a few years back). I love reading and literature (and I enjoy learning about history, although I don't have her passion for it); I share her love for teaching (although I'm not a teacher); I was a great student in school, but not a popular kid at all; I'm level-headed and responsible, but I can be impulsive under the right circumstances; I'm very protective of the people I love; I'm Italian and was brought up a Catholic; I'm often the tallest girl in the room (I'm just a bit shorter than Bea Arthur was!) and I'm not attractive (not that Dorothy isn't -- but she is perceived as unattractive in the show), so I also understand her self-esteem issues fairly well.
I'm not as quick-witted as she is, unfortunately, and nowadays my outlook on life is more positive and easy-going than hers, but she's still the one I relate to the most.
5. Favourite character?
Blanche, although the other Girls are very, very close. I adore them all and I especially love to see them interact, but if I have to pick one, then it's Blanche. She's the one who surprised me the most! At the start of the show I kind of wrote her off as 'the man-crazy one', and that's as far removed from me as possible, so I didn't really focus much on her at the beginning. Then came S1E4 The Transplant, and then came her family issues, and then came all her memories of George, and before I knew it I was head-over-heels in love with her. Rue was masterful in how subtly she played her; she showed Blanche's depth as a character little by little, letting the audience peek behind the mask only for moments at a time, so when I realized I hadn't given her the attention she deserved, I was already in too deep.
6. Favourite story of a cast member?
Oh, so many good ones to choose from! The first one that comes to mind is Bea's anecdote about the time she was Tallulah Bankhead's understudy. The awe with which she describes her coming down the stairs is palpable -- but I mostly admire how she took Bankhead's mean comment and turned it into motivation. And Bea did get her 'coming down the stairs to thunderous applause' moment (more than once!), so her vow came true!
A fun one that involves all four main actresses is this blooper related to Blanche's Christmas gift to the girls, the 'The Men Of Blanche's Boudoir' calendar. Watching all of them lose their marbles over this prank is priceless -- it always puts a big smile on my face!
(Is this what you meant by this question? I wasn't sure!)
7. Which was the episode that got you hooked?
The pilot, lmao. It might be a cheesy answer, but it's true! I was immediately hooked from S1E1 scene one. Dorothy's incredible entrance got me.
8. You could wear one girl’s wardrobe for the rest of your life, who would you pick?
It's a toss-up between Blanche's and Dorothy's.
9. How many kids do you think they all actually had?
... this ask made me realize there are doubts about this, lmao. I've never done the math! Had to go check on wikipedia 😂
As far as I can tell, it's fairly set in stone that Rose had five children, of which we meet two (Kirsten, with two different faces 😂, and Brigit, who I assume is her youngest one).
It also seems reasonably certain that Dorothy had two kids -- Kate and Michael. I will say I've always thought Kate was much younger than she should have been in her appearances on the show, considering Dorothy was pregnant with her when she married, but maybe she just looked much younger than she actually was, I don't know.
Blanche is more complicated. We see both of her daughters, Janet and Rebecca, and in S3E3 Bringing Up Baby she mentions three sons, Matthew (also known as 'Skippy'), Doug, and Biff. In that same episode, though, she also says she's had four kids! I get where the disconnect comes from, haha. To be precise, her quote is:
"I have had four kids, I have never had a Mercedes."
This is just off the top of my head, but I wonder if she means 'I have had' in the sense of 'I have given birth to' here? This would imply one of her children is actually adopted (which is very interesting to think about!!). Since she directly mentions her three sons after this quote, I suppose our suspects are Janet and Becky. I'll have to give this some more thought, though -- for now my answer is that Blanche has five kids, and that 'four' is a continuity error on the writers' part.
10. Do you think the actresses would’ve gotten along with their characters if they met in real life? Why/Why not?
Interesting question! I think so, yes.
Dorothy and Bea seem fairly similar already -- as far as I know Bea was a big sweetheart, a private, gentle person, and Dorothy's a big sweetheart too. Plus I feel like Dorothy would have been respectful of Bea's introverted nature, and Bea would have been understanding and accepting of Dorothy's personal history (not to mention, she wouldn't have mocked her for not dating/for her appearance).
In all the interviews I've seen, Estelle seems very respectful and very fond of old people in general -- I think she'd find Sophia a riot! I seem to remember a clip in which she actually says she likes Sophia, so I feel pretty secure in stating they'd get along.
There's this famous quote by Rue in which she essentially says that she's similar to Blanche in everything but the fact that she's not from Atlanta 😂 so I feel justified in assuming they would have had fun with each other! Rue's stated that she felt an immediate connection to Blanche as a character, and that playing Blanche helped her gain more self-esteem and confidence, so I think meeting her in person would have had a similar effect! And Rue (being a very open, honest, compassionate person) might have helped Blanche drop her mask a little bit.
The only one I have an inkling of doubt about is Betty -- mostly because she'd run circles around Rose! But ultimately I think any 'mocking' would be gentle and affectionate, much like the Girls' jokes in the show. I think they would have liked each other -- and they could have bonded on their common love for animals alone!
11. What are your other comfort shows?
Apart from the aforementioned Good Omens, I'm also very fond of Only Murders In The Building, a really fun show about solving murders and found family that I wholeheartedly recommend. Derry Girls is another recent favourite. Oh, if you like cartoons too, I recommend Steven Universe, Hilda, and Avatar: The Last Airbender.
12. Headcanons? (Feel free to list as many as you’d like)
Oh, my god. I have so many and I'm for sure going to forget some. Let's see...
I've already said some time ago that in my mind Dorothy drives stick shift. Reasoning for this is that Italians (including yours truly, haha!) drive stick shift, and she's of Italian descent, so... she knows how to drive an automatic car, she just learned how to drive on a stick shift one (and in the streets of Brooklyn, no less!). Still on Dorothy: I think she has a very neat handwriting (she feels like the type of person who consciously decided to improve her handwriting at some point in her life), but she's prone to leaving ink stains on the page (and on her hands!!), especially when she's writing in a hurry.
Rose is really strong! Physically strong, I mean. I know she was a housewife for most of her life, but she was a farm girl first! Farming takes a lot of physical resilience, and that's the kind of strength that stays with you, I think. She's the one who lifts up the furniture when they clean (S2E12 The Sisters), and I don't think they'd let her do that if she couldn't handle it. Plus, remember that time she broke a whole ceramic cup with one bare hand (in S7E19 A Midwinter Night's Dream)? Yeah. I also subscribe to some mutuals' hc that she's autistic (although they'll be able to comment on it much better than I can, if they want to!).
Regarding Blanche, I really enjoy @\eeblouissant's hc that she has a permanent tan! She's from the South, she's lived near the coast for ages, *and* she's expressed an appreciation for sunbathing in the show, so it makes perfect sense to me. Also: she's a cover hog! In the show Rose is the one who admits to stealing the covers (in S2E5 Isn't It Romantic?, iirc), but I like to think Blanche is the worst offender. It's a good way to complete the Girls' trifecta of sleeping annoyances (Dorothy snores, Rose sleeptalks, Blanche steals the covers!), and I think it's thematically appropriate for her -- considering her Southern origin, I think she's more sensitive to the cold than Dorothy and Rose are, and she's always looking for affection, so...
Oh, regarding their sexuality: I don't have a marked preference for any of them, but I tend to think of Blanche as a bisexual with a lot of internalized homophobia. Rose is also bi, and somewhere on the asexual spectrum (and I have textual evidence for this!). @\hecatesbroom has completely convinced me to read Dorothy as a repressed lesbian, but I'm fine with people considering her bisexual too. I prefer queer interpretations of all of them, but I'm honestly fine with any take, as long as the strong (platonic or romantic) bond between them is preserved.
Most of my headcanons on Sophia are just traits borrowed from my grandmothers -- for example, I like to think that she started getting into gardening once she moved in with the Girls, and she's really gifted at it (like my grandma!).
13. What would you change (if anything) about the show/ characters if it was set in the modern day?
This is a really hard question to answer properly, because while the show is still very relevant to the present day, some aspects are so grounded in their time that a lot of things don't make as much sense when transposed into the future. For example -- would Dorothy end up marrying Stanley and staying married to him for 38 years if he'd gotten her pregnant in the 90s? Single mothers weren't exactly celebrated back then either (Madonna's Papa Don't Preach is from 1986), but they still had it much better than they did back in the 40s-50s -- and divorce has become much more accessible (and socially acceptable) in the past few decades. Would she have left him earlier? Would she have married him at all?
And what about Sophia? Being an Italian immigrant in the 50s seems different from being an Italian immigrant in the 20s -- there was a whole World War between the two, for starters. Would she still emigrate to the US? Would she even emigrate at all? How would she have survived the fascist regime in Italy?
Blanche and Rose are perhaps less grounded in their time. St Olaf is so absurd it might as well be the exact same in the present day (and dying in childbirth is unfortunately still too common, so it's not strange to think that Rose would be an orphan in any case), and considering how some people still think and behave nowadays, Blanche's biography and opinions seem plausible even when transposed 30-40 years into the future (at least to me). But still -- many of the issues they deal with were grounded in their time. Take Rose's AIDS scare: would she react in the same way in the present day, knowing that care for HIV patients has progressed so much?
To be fair, apart from all these questions, all of the Girls are still plausible (and relatable) characters from a modern POV; but society has changed a lot in the past 30-40 years, and I think a groundbreaking, socially advanced show like Golden Girls would necessarily have to change as a consequence. It's just in the spirit of the show! The core idea of four women sharing a life is still a perfect premise, but the problems the Girls face, their careers, their economic stability, their ideas on love and relationships -- there's a lot that could be different when transposed to the present day! I feel like this question requires much more space, time, and analysis to be answered properly.
One thing I like to think is that at least some of the Girls might have been explicitly queer if the show was set in the present day! Which opens up a lot of avenues for plot-lines and relationships :)
14. Which other Fictional Characters would you like each one of the golden girls to meet?
I have a storyboard in my notes for a little comic in which the Girls travel to England and meet Aziraphale and Crowley from Good Omens, so them, definitely 😂
Also, the Derry Girls! Check out this great crossover fic on Ao3 -- the chaotic energy is just off the charts, I love it.
15. Who were your favourite duo?
Oh, I can't choose. Any duo within the Girls. Their 1:1 interactions are all amazing, there's no way I can pick just one. I love the bond between Dorothy and Sophia, I love Dorothy and Blanche's chemistry, I love how fun and silly Blanche and Rose get to be together, I love the ironclad trust between Dorothy and Rose, I love Blanche and Sophia's love-(fake) hate friendship, I love the way Sophia hides her immense affection for Rose under a veil of humour and the way Rose sees right through it. I could write an essay on each pair of them.
15. Who should’ve got more 1:1 screen time with each other?
I'm pretty happy with the amount of 1:1 time each pair of Girls got with each other, actually! One of the strengths of the show imho is how well-balanced the interactions between the main cast are. If I really have to nitpick, I think I might have liked a couple of episodes specifically on Dorothy and Rose in the last couple of seasons; it feels like they interacted 1:1 less after S5, but that might just be me.
I also think the Girls' interactions with secondary characters and guests were well-balanced, in general; I can't think of any specific example where I wished for one of the Girls to have more interactions with a certain character.
... okay, there is one instance, but it's not really a matter of screen time, more of what happened during said screen time. I really, really wanted to see Blanche (with Rose as support) tear into Stan. I think we deserved a scene where she tells him off for the way he treats Dorothy -- she's already pretty caustic in the show when it comes to him (except in S6, for some reason...), and a proper confrontation would have been glorious.
16. Calmest season?
Is there one? 😂 the first season, I guess? It feels a bit more 'domestic' and contained in scope, likely because it was the first -- but it's still a wild ride!!
17. Most chaotic season?
Season 3, for sure. It's a bit all over the place, and it contains some of the wildest premises in the whole series -- I mean, Bringing Up Baby? Letter to Gorbachev? Mister Terrific? I could go on -- there's lots of chaotic episodes in there! (Just to be clear: I love the chaos! S3 is not my favourite season, but it's still great -- and it's got some amazing episodes!)
18. Favorite Season?
I think the honour goes to season 5! It would probably be S6, if not for the whole 'Dorothy falls back in love with Stan' plot line. S7 is the one that contains the highest count of favourite episodes for me, but I think S5 is stronger as a whole, and it's got some true gems.
19. If the girls hadn’t had their established careers, what other ones could you picture them doing?
Oh, let's see! Stan mentions Dorothy always wanted to open an antique shop back in S1E11 The Return of Dorothy's Ex, and I think that really fits her. I can also see her as a (very passionate) librarian! And, of course, she'd be great as a college professor / history researcher.
Despite the Girls' lack of confidence in her ability to keep things alive, I think with proper training Rose would work well as a nurse. She already volunteers for the hospital, she can be competent when given the chance, she's a giving person, and she loves taking care of people, so I think she at least has the right attitude for it -- although I'd never place her in a stressful unit, especially at the start of the show! Apart from this, anything to do with animals, of course -- a zoo, a farm, a pet shop, she'd excel in all of them!
I can see Blanche thriving as a trophy wife, haha 😂 but that's not properly a career, so it's not a valid answer. Taking her keen artistic eye into account, I think she'd be great as a designer -- either a fashion designer, or an interior decorator. She also showed some talent and interest in psychology during the series, although I'm not sure she'd manage to remain completely professional as a psychologist. 😅
As for Sophia, I think she'd do well in any position that allows her to be a motivator! She's great at encouraging people through a bit of tough love, and she's a very driven person herself -- so I think she'd do well as a manager of sorts, although the kind of manager that still works hands-on too. I believe she'd manage to hold her own in more or less any field; she's very adaptable! I do think she's at her best in a kitchen, though.
20. Best aspects of the show in your opinion?
There's a lot! The writing, the performances, the costume department, it was all exceptional. I think the best aspect to me is the premise, and how seriously they took it! The idea of a show centered on four older women living together is groundbreaking, especially since it didn't make a mockery of them -- the Girls are serious, well-rounded characters, with full lives, written with lots of love and respect. I think this show really convinced me that life isn't over once you hit 30, and that there's plenty to look forward to as you age! A lot of people my age are terrified of growing older, and here I am, eager to see what's coming next -- and I owe at least some of this attitude to this show. I'm really grateful!
21. (This question is for my fellow cheesecake lovers) favourite cheesecake flavour?
:) Great question! I love cheesecakes in general, but I'm especially partial to raspberry cheesecakes.
22. Storyline you wished they had expanded upon?
The show has an unfortunate tendency to introduce characters and then forget about them, which allowed for more variety in the stories they chose to tell, but I would have liked to see some of the Girls' relatives and friends return! Like, I don't know -- Jean, for example, or Blanche's nephew from back in S1. Some of the guests' arcs are complete within their episode (as happens eg for Lily, Rose's sister), but others remained a bit 'in the air', and I think it would have been nice to see them again.
Oh, and also -- I would have liked some little references to the Girls' issues and problems outside of the episodes they're tackled in! References to Blanche's pacemaker, for example, or to Rose's addiction, or to Dorothy's CFS (or her hearing aid!!). I understand that the time was limited, but even a small callback or two would have been nice!
23. Questions you’d ask the actresses?
Does 'will you marry me' count? 😭
I'm not sure -- knowing me, I'd probably be unable to utter a word in their presence! Rather than ask questions, I think I'd just thank them for bringing such an incredible, wonderful show to life. It wouldn't have been the same without them.
24. Episode that brings you the most comfort?
Most of them, really. Even the sad ones; I hear the first few notes of the opening theme and my spirits are already lifted. I can pick one per season, if that's alright:
S1E25 The Way We Met
S2E17 Bedtime Story
S3E3 Bringing Up Baby
S4E4 Yokel Hero
S5E23 The Mangiacavallo Curse Makes a Lousy Wedding Present
S6E26 Henny Penny -- Straight, No Chaser
S7E23/24 Home Again, Rose
But honestly there's so many more I could mention! I just love these ladies so much and I love to watch them in situations, haha.
25. Episode that made you laugh the hardest?
This is a cruel choice! Golden Girls is infamous in my house as 'the show that makes the-eclectic-wonderer howl with laughter', and I think that speaks for itself 😂
Let me pick at least three: S2E4 It's a Miserable Life, S7E2 The Case of the Libertine Belle, and S7E4 That's For Me To Know.
26. Which other work that the actresses did you enjoy the most?
I believe most of Estelle's career prior to The Golden Girls was in the theater, so I'm not sure it's even possible to watch her other works, unfortunately.
Show me Bea Arthur singing literally anything and I will be on my knees in seconds. Her musical performances are peak. Also -- I still haven't watched Maude, but I already know I'll love it.
Maude includes Rue as well -- I cannot wait to fall in love with her as Vivian too! And I have one of her early movies in my watch list, although I'm waiting for the right moment to watch it (homegirl plays a stripper and I'm not sure I can handle it in company without making a fool of myself, considering my big gay crush on her).
As for Betty -- Life With Elizabeth, absolutely. She's so funny and so beautiful and so captivating in it! She's simply charming, I love her to bits.
27. Best St Olaf Story?
The Great Herring War from S1E25 The Way We Met, no question. It's not necessarily the strongest from a comedy point of view (although it's certainly up there -- it's hilarious!), but the context and the way Dorothy and Blanche contribute to it make it the most memorable one, imho. It's my favourite, for sure.
(The story of Gunilla Bjorndunker, St Olaf's tallest woman, as told in S6E3 If At Last You Do Succeed is in second place).
28. Best slut story?
It changes every time I hear one, lmao! I love all of Blanche's stories!
If I must pick one -- I really enjoy Blanche's retelling of that time she realized she was even more devastating by moonlight in S1E25 The Way We Met, if only for that incredible final line ("It was at that moment I realized my bosoms had the power to make music!"). I'm not sure if it counts, because it's so brief, but her involuntary remembrance of that time she had to call a cab to get home because the sailor she hooked up with wouldn't wake up (S2E17 Bedtime Story) always has me in stitches -- I love how unexpected and effective it is!
Oh, and I'm really fond of the one she tells her mama in S3E25 Mother's Day. I'm very sensitive to the theme of loved ones getting older and having trouble remembering stuff, so that whole flashback hits close to home for me, and I love how Blanche's story helps her and her mama connect over shared memories. It's really touching (and Rue's acting is spectacular).
29. Best Sicily story?
Sophia's alleged encounter with Pablo Picasso, as narrated in S6E24 Never Yell Fire In A Crowded Retirement Home: Part 1. I somehow didn't anticipate the punchline, and I lost my shit when Sophia name-dropped Picasso. I still lose my shit every time I listen to it. It's a classic.
30. Which girl would you be most interested in seeing a prequel of? And at which point in their life?
I would pay dearly for a young!Dorothy show. It might be depressing (because her life with Stan was... well... yikes) but also imagine -- Dorothy learning how to be a mom, her life at college, building herself a life... so many possibilities!!! And it would be even better if it featured some flashbacks to Sophia's life in Sicily!
I would enjoy a show about teenage Blanche's adventures, too, but a part of me thinks those stories are at their best when retold by Blanche herself (ie when there's a good amount of doubt as to their veracity, lmao).
#these were so much fun!! i loved them!!!#thank you so much <3 i hope this is what you expected?#i do often say i love taking about the girls and you gave me the occasion to talk about them *a lot* so im very grateful!!#the witness protection program thing came a bit out of left field but it's not that bad *per se*. it's just that they used it as an excuse#to change miles' character in a way i don't enjoy if that makes sense#that question about kids tickled my brain. i'll have to think about blanche's kids a little more#but the implications are really interesting#cover hog blanche is so important to me. it fits her so well!! i can see her holding george like a teddy bear in her sleep when he was aliv#and then he died. and the bed was empty and cold. what could she do but try to recapture that warmth by wrapping herself in the covers?#i hope my answer about the girls in a modern setting makes sense. the show spent a lot of time tackling the societal problems *of the time*#so it would necessarily be different if it were set in the present day. i mean -- imagine the girls dealing with social media alone!#any academic career would work well for dorothy imho. can you imagine having her as a college professor?#so many students would be in love with her lmao. oh -- i think she'd also be a great writer! of poetry and of prose :)#i might be biased in favour of nurse!rose bc she is a nurse in a little au of mine that will remain confined to my brain lol#but i do gen think she could do a good job!#please don't take the trophy wife blanche comment too seriously lmao it's mostly a joke. in any case she'd be an active trophy wife#one of those that organize events and take part in the community and stuff. she's smart and driven!#great herring war scene my beloved... it's impossible to overstate just how much i love that scene#it's one of my all-time favourites for sure#the golden girls#tag game
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rusty-gloinks · 6 months
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heuy guyse please don’t call my art ai generated that’s .;really mean .and evil
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akkivee · 1 year
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been letting myself get seduced by a man canonically born either in 1978 or 1989
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artsycloudysleepy · 5 months
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Here to go! Sorry for not making you art I’m tired lol
*SCREAMS*
OH MY STARS THANK YOU SO MUCH :0000
THIS HAS MADE MY DAY I LOVE HOW YOU DRAW THEM!!! TYSM!!!
:D
(edit: why do i ramble so much in tags lol. at least it's an awesome thing to ramble abt :D)
#artsy's woah#artsy's moot sillies#artsy's socks#artsy's chichi#artsy's chaaya#artsy's fabrication#artsy's dew#artsy's ocs#I DID NOT EXPECT THIS WHATSOEVER THANK YOU#HOW FAST DO YOU DRAW????#(btw u don't have to apologise for anything!! i'm not holding u at gunpoint to draw my blorbos - i'm just so happy u do in the first place!#(and the tiredness is a mood lmfao dw /gen)#(also i will draw uni today or during the weekend! my motivation and energy fluctuate and i am MUCH procrastination lol)#BUT ABOUT THE BEAUTIFUL ART I SEE BEFORE ME:#socks is so adorable in your style!! little weird plush that is probably not sentient. probably sentient. who knows. he is SO CUTE#i love the shape of his tentacles btw#chichi!! with their apply juice!! they look so cool!!!#(also i LOVE the freckles you gave it! it looks so cute with them!!)#CHAAYA. YHE EEPIEST OF EEPIES. SHE LOOKS LIKE ME EVERY SINGLE DAY UPON REALISING LIFE EXISTS OUTSIDE OF BED#also i have no idea if her glaring at socks is intentional or just happened to be where they were drawn but that is SO canon lmao#i mean she's 6yo so does get snappy if past her bedtime. plus socks is Not Liked by ppl apart from azzie so he is Prime Glaring Target lol#actually screw it i'm making it canon that whenever chaaya's overtired everyone can tell bc she glares at Socks for hours without breaks :)#dew picks her up for bed and she doesn't break eye contact. just glares until socks is gone#AND SPEAKING OF DEW. STARS HE LOOKS AMAZING#HIS POSE IS SO BRILLIANT HOW DO YOU DO IT#i really love how you drew her clothes!! especially the jacket and the jeans - they would 100% have most of their pairs ripped#(tho more likely from falling over rather than design lol. i have dyspraxia like her and can confirm half my clothes are in tatters ;-;)#(also side note the way you draw shoes is *chef's kiss*. stunning /gen)#you also got their personalities so well!! your art is so impressive :0#and their hair is so fluffy. i wish to pet it (they would all kill me and/or scream if i did such a thing. especially chichi)
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loverboydotcom · 1 year
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my dad watching the 2000s music compilation channel girl you do not realise how much of a vibe you are
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onepiexe · 2 years
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i havent done anything manual labor in so long
#logbook#woke up to my body aching like crazy#. .i miss this feeling. idk when i'll have time bc of work but man. i should exercise.#couldnt pull some plant carts right away in my first week 😭 also yesterday i couldnt lift a box.#i was too short to put it on the shelf is what i said but i was also tired at that point in the day. augh.#i loaded up 2 ladies cars. . .also moved and lifted pots.#plastic but big stacks and some bigger sizes.#today we have a fl+werw++d delivery. wonder what all it is. probably just more perennials.#i figured the ache would go away but i miss my old coworkers so much. . .#and then i remember how long it took for me to stop aching and missing ml while at nnl. . .so yeah. just on top of new work lol#ive had several emps say i look like a kid. which. thanks guys. sorry but when i was 15 i didnt look 25. .#i feel sorry to ppl who look at old when that young tbh. also it makes me go insane bc im p sure most of the younger emps#ARE in fact. younger than me. based on conversations. but nobody believes me 😭#tbf l+wes had a 18+ policy but this nursery is a gen family owned so they hire teens looking for work and work experience.#i dont personally see how anybody can think im -18 bc im working FULL not part time and i'm mon-fri but still.#regardless ive had a guy joke abt child labor laws bc i get in early. and some dude yesterday asked if i was doing hmwk. jesus christ guys.#ok i have to get ready for work 😭 gaia give me patience and reward me plsssssss
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gikairan · 2 years
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I dont think i'm ever not going to be grumpy about TPC deciding to make the 1,000th pokemon the lovechild of a wacky arm-waving inflatable tube man and a cheesestring........
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Like, its a milestone number. And you made this thing for it..... that was a Mistake u_u
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aceoflights · 1 month
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https://www.tumblr.com/aceoflights/759151916437684224/you-didnt-add-an-option-for-swifties-who-only?source=share
Trust me it doesn't make a difference. This is THE anti swiftie site
I get that. But I'm gonna be honest, I think it does make a difference. Because as it stands that poll is not really representative of much. It shows you non-swifties (and possibly swifties who bought 1 or less versions of the album) in comparison to swifties who bought 2 or more.
I get that it's funny to look at and say that there is almost no swifties on this site, but that's actually not what the data says (even if it might be the case).
And i honestly do not care about how many swifties are on here and how many of them bought how many albums. I just am not really a fan of people using data to say something that the data is not representative of. Especiallly when it's simply skewed by the fact that the possible answers to give were bound to give that result.
Here's a poll with the same question where the answers make sense
Now this is not an attack on anyone. This is a topic that simply does not matter. And I just want everyone to have their fun. Have your fun bashing swifties (as long as you're not mean) for all I care.
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prismit · 10 months
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hmmm should i play dead cells or should i utilize this wednesday to use island scan in pokemon ultra sun so i can shiny hunt honedge and name it after the sentient sword from dead cells
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thatdeadaquarius · 8 months
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HELP I JUST HAD A THOUGH
WHAT IF
What if....
Blunt reader became a harbinger
I have NO idea how that would go but im here for the crack lol
I BEEN WAITIN FOR THIS ONE-
(and to use this gif more importantly they're all so hot here lol)
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Sun: Reader (you/they/them), Blunt Language AU :D
Orbit: Headcanons-ish, crack treated srsly (yes im using ao3 tags atp)
Stars: Harbingers!
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: none known & Trigger Warnings: none known.
Please comment if I missed any. /gen
SO thought I’d update anyone missing out bc of the new year but-
I made this silly thing called Blunt Language AU, that was my 1st post for this blog/fandom actually! :D
I’ll link it here, but TLDR: it’s just our modern speech sounding “ancient” to the Teyvatians, who speak really flowery/fluffy/lots of context in comparison!
That’s all you rlly need to know to read this I think, so enjoy! :)
u fall into Genshin Impact, and Snezhnaya is where you land first type of energy lol
weird golden star falling from the sky? that sounds like a prophecy the Tsaritsa knows abt alright
so they sent Childe, one of the friendliest (if not The Friendliest) Harbinger, to see if it was a valid claim you’d finally descended,
and ofc as soon as the redhead heard you try and talk to him, he knew the claims by the small village nearby (who had taken u in from the cold weather/taken care of you) were legit
pantalone did manage to squeeze some examples of what you’d possibly sound like into his head before he left so while Childe personally has a tough time talking to you, it doesn't mean he’s not willing to try!! >:)
he mostly just kept asking questions forever until he understood what you meant, and as soon he got u were asking abt the Tsaritsa, the other Harbingers, himself, even how to get Sneznayan-made clothes lol
he was like: 👀👀👀???!!!!
it wasn't so much recruitment at first as it was “omg the exalted one wishes to learn abt us, the Tsaritsa and her Harbingers? abt me?? well would your highness like to come to our palace perchance???!!!!”
= have u ever been seduced and worshipped by a god and her country?? would you like to- ??? ← Childe actually
and with that convinces you to come straight to the Harbingers/Tsaritsa’s very home
No, you’re not just spoiled.
No, you’re not just pampered.
You are cosseted and coveted.
The Tsaritsa makes her first in person appearance to the people in decades to personally announce your return, and to get a festival going to literally parade you into the capital lol
And tbh it was kind of shocking how quickly the people of Snezhnaya are able to whip out the party supplies, within days of traveling via horses/sleds/carriage/trains all kinds of transportation, u arrived at the capital in full swing of a parade for you
The Tsaritsa herself in what looks like a genshin-ified kokoshnik, the elaborate headress draped with a veil so thin it looks like frost covering her face,
flocked on either side by her harbingers in full (kinda goth) ceremonial outfits waiting on your arrival too
needless to say you are properly smitten intimidated
and you stay nervous around them for the first few days or so,
that is before you run into the weekly, what you would call “family dinner nights”, but they call “dinner reports”…
in which Childe, the only one you’d been comfortable enough around to be a bit more genuine to, and surprisingly the only one to quickly adapt to your speech after traveling with you for days, would translate for you what tf you were saying to them vs. what everyone at the table was saying to you/around you
you would also like to propose other titles for these weekly dinner meetings you’re invited to, aka “family feud dinner night/family fight night/harbinger on harbinger hate night/fruit on fruit crimes, if you will” 💀
the Tsaritsa is just peacefully talking to you abt any and everything, bc ofc Pierro’s on her right, and ur on her left
(she and Pierro are surprisingly soft spoken, very polite, and able to say something interesting/take an interest in whatever subject you all end up on)
u don't think you've ever been more comfortable and on such equal footing around ppl sm older than you (what are older ppl to you, but to them ur literally fucking eldritch with how ancient u are, and u can tell with how they treat u like it lmao)
hard cut back to the rest of the table:
an argument that just gets louder and louder has broken out between Childe, Dottore, La Signora, and Pantalone abt who should get free time with you first/get to do smth with you first as you get over ur adjustment period here, Childe has taken his butter knife to throw and just barely missed Dottore’s eye, and it is now embedded in the back of his fancy chair (the servants placing down dinner courses just move abt w/the most bored expressions on their faces)
(u send half the table if this group gets out of hand and u just: “Please shut the fuck up, each of ur comebacks take 30 minutes and it’s killing me” 💀 bc they're the most likely to understand u too, even Pierro/Capitano/Pulcinella chuckle a little, and u think the Tsaritsa smirked under her veil)
ur honestly too scared to see what Scarmouche, Sandrone, and Arlecchino are arguing about, because they're arguing so silently further down the table. They have murder in their eyes.
Columbina and Capitano are having a peaceful collab over weapons, armor, and clothing to offer you, Pulcinella is close enough to both participate in that convo and in you, Pierro, and the Tsaritsa’s convos too
by the 2nd week you've decided to choose chaos, and get them to play board games together sometimes (they cant all make it all the time, tbh u don't know if u can handle that either) but groups of them will play at a time
u remembered early on what a dick Dottore was, and sentenced asked if he’d like to play this new board game called “Monopoly” from ur world with Childe, Pantalone, Pierro, Arlecchino, La Signora, and Scaramouche all together :)
(so what ur trying to bring khaenri’ah part 2 down on his head as punishment?? u owe scara and collei that at least)
Columbina is more than happy to help get you Harbinger-like clothes to wear since ur so interested in the style!! (yes yesss get converted, she already has a title picked out for you)
she also giggles anytime u talk abt whether u like an outfit or not, bc u just “no thank you I’d rather wear a trash bag than that shirt, but lets try another?”
meanwhile the tailors in the background u could literally edit them to one of those videos where it just zooms in on their faces with a vine boom of shock
like Pierro, ur unranked, just above the other Harbingers really, as it wouldn't do to make you the 12th Harbinger or smth
the names they gave you being, “The Playwright” or “The Renaissance” or even “Drammaturgo”
(pls anyone who speaks Italian correct if I'm wrong ToT )
ok but the first time, unsurprisingly, one of them got snappy with you, likely Scara I would think,
Scaramouche, pissy: “And what shall we do if it appears our almighty god is perhaps a descender who is entirely human? Why I dare say you’d be transgressing on privileges that were never yours to begin with!”
Every other Harbinger, the Tsaritsa herself, the servants, the frost on the walls: 😶😦😨😶‍🌫️
You, unbothered, still eating and fully expecting this moment: “I don't want to hear it from someone who has god-mommy issues. You shouldn’t have an opinion about me, ur biased.”
yeah, so obviously, they’re emotionally all attached now whether they know it or not, and this was of course the moment they realized they're god would fit in so perfectly here
(the other nations are going to have to pry you from Snezhnaya from their cold dead hands, esp since u now have legal deniability to visit bc ur technically a Harbinger, only commanded by her majesty lol)
(Scaramouche, Arlecchino, and Sandrone were fighting about who gets the room nearest to your quarters lol)
(Capitano won, somehow??)
sorry ive been slow lately guys, been just trying to work on alllll the fics these past weeks/days/however long its been??
anyway had the shift from hell last week so wish me luck with work this week if u see this 😭
hope u enjoyed this old ask/crack treated srsly post orah!! :D
Safe Travels,
💀♒
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If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"
(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")
♡the beloveds♡
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily / @justinsomniachild / @nanithefuck / @questionotmystopit
@kiyomi-uchiha777
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iamjellyfish · 2 months
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Headcanon about the dynamic of you, Hoshina Soshiro, and Narumi Gen! |·˚✎ ﹏
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❥A/n: I had no idea to write about the Idol Soldier series so I will write 2019 ahhh Wattpad tropes and headcanon until anyone drops an idea into my request post TvT (Pls drop something)
HELP THE TEACHER CAUGHT ME WRITING THIS, I'M DYING.
❥Summary: You somehow ended up with them, what your relationship looks like in my head.
❥Warning: there is an 18+ part (separated ofc), probably OOC, English is not my first language, and Grammarly held my hand while writing this lol, mostly fluff, etc, reverse-harem type of relationship because I don't ship any cp.
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[Safezone- SFW]
✦ Narumi would always ask you to gacha for him (I had this idea from another fic which is also my favorite fic).
✦ Narumi and Hoshina love to spoil you, they love it if you wear or use their gifts daily.
✦ They prefer dates like a picnic or dinner at some restaurant near their workplace due to their work nature.
✦ Hoshina and Narumi will have the angel-devil-type dynamic for you. Like how Narumi would ask you to stay up late with him to watch him play games, and Hoshina would tell you to get enough sleep.
✦You and Hoshina would help each other in the kitchen cooking then you would have to drag Narumi's ass out to eat because he is too focused on his game to eat.
✦They would gift you things that remind them of you; Narumi would brag if you like his present more, and Hoshina would tease him about something else that makes Narumi all angry.
✦Hoshina would wake you and purposely forget to wake Narumi up (not like Hoshina will succeed in waking Narumi up anyway).
✦You would make lunch, Hoshina would make breakfast, then Narumi would wait for you both to make dinner.
✦Like when you sit on their laps, especially when they have to do their paperwork.
✦Would host nights where they cuddle you and watch movies, and if the next day is a day off, you guys would binge some series.
✦Gifting them would be pretty hard because you feel like if they wanted something, then they would get it before you even get them. So you would pretty much get them handmade gifts or cook their favorite meal.
✦ They would talk about you to others so much that it got annoying for everyone involved, lol.
✦ 2 yapper x listener or yapper x yapper x yapper.
✦ If you text them, they will reply to you pretty quick, with Narumi, it's started to get annoying when you just texted him and are about to put the phone down but he already texted back (you would get a text from Hasegawa telling you to restrain from texting Narumi when he is at work due to how he will ditch work to text you).
✦ They will put your picture as their phone wallpaper and will whine if you don't put their picture as wallpaper.
✦ If you work in the first/third division, they would tease how they got you closer to them. And the other one would pout to you about how they got teased.
✦They remember a lot about your interest even if you don't think they will remember something so insignificant.
✦Like to tease you like a lot, sometimes gang together to tease you to the point you blush like tomatoes.
✦ Would love it if you played with their hair and tried on their clothes.
ೋ❀❀ೋ═══ ❀ ═══ೋ❀❀ೋ
Nsfw
❣ Love to give you hickeys and bite marks, ... Sometimes, get too excited and mark you too much that it gets annoying to cover them up.
❣Love to make you moan so much that it fills the room. And would tease you about it afterward.
❣Kiss you as much as they can while doing it.
❣You can turn them on by just wearing their shirt and underwear (I imagine that their shirt is pretty big for you).
❣Sometimes they would pull you in for a quickie while at work because they missed you so much.
❣ Aftercare is always good, and you guys ended up bath together. There is probably an argument about the water temperature.
❣brat tamer! Hoshina and brat enable! Narumi go go!
❣ Would try out kinks with you because they want to know what button to press when it comes to you <3
❣ They will speed up a little if you start screaming their name while doing it.
❣ Always foreplay because that's when they could tease you most.
❣ If you mark them, they will flex it but belike "Oops, didn't mean to let you see that!;)" Everyone knows.
❣Could go multiple rounds if you can handle it. It got to the point where you think they get stamina from fucking you.
❣ If you could suck them or ride them when they're doing paperwork, they would be so happy.
❣Hoshina would like to command you but Narumi would like you to command him.
❣Always make sure that you enjoy it as much as they do and would hate if they made you hurt.
❣They would tease you if you can't walk after it but still care about your health.
❣If they need to go on a mission for a few days, they will send you dirty pictures, and if you send them back dirty images? Oh, they would be so turned on that they wish they could teleport to you now.
❣They would sometimes get horny when they see you wear the defense force's battle suit.
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the-moon-files · 15 days
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I’m not sure if I’ve said this one already or not, but I wanted to tell you anyways! It’s about the humans-are-not-hylians AU!
You know the uncanny valley evolution? That thing where when you look at something that resembles a living being too closely and some part of your mind is screaming that it’s not whatever it looks like and to get away from it? Imagine that with the reader! They can spot shapeshifters easily because of this, but it instills the same extreme primal fear we’d experience, so it might be hard for the reader to confront them at first and they’ll instead just tell the Chain for a while.
This might be a double edged sword, though, because when Twilight is in his wolf form, the reader still gets that same feeling when “Wolfie” is looking at them, whether or not they know it’s Twilight. In this case, the first time the reader spots Wolfie approaching the camp, they probably freak out and try to avoid him, even if the Links are okay with him or if he seems familiar to them.
The bottom line is that wolf isn’t a wolf, so what is he?
“It’s okay, he’s a really friendly wolf!”
“...That’s not a wolf...”
Sorry i took forever to respond!! im slow as always, life is too busy for even my hobbies lately sobs 😭
bro this is especially true bc someone looked back at TP games and how he looks in his “wolf” form, and apparently he is actually a dog lol - like at most a wolf-hybrid, i added this in to support this Hyrule-is-hella-Uncanny AU lol
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Moon: Guide! - Gender Neutral/Masc!Reader (”you”/he/him)
Orbit: Short headcanons
Stars: mentions of most of our Links <3
Comets & Meteors: CWs: typical LU/Loz violence, mild swearing, etc & TWs: mild possible derealization trigger, talk of Link’s Awakening and Koholint.
Please comment if I missed any. /gen
The Yiga clan members have never fooled you, not Once in person, unlike back when hyrule was still a video game
it was the constant smell of bananas, the way their eyes were always a little unfocused or they moved their head to move around their eyes, rather than their actual pupils moving, the facial muscles all stiff, usually stuck in an uncomfortable smile-
it makes more sense once u realize that they technically have a mask under that glamour hylian face, but its never not hilarious to see Wild look over his shoulder at you before approaching a lone traveler on the roads and watch him get increasingly frantic to get ur attention to see if theyre yiga lmao
u bet ur ass every link was relying on you on their adventures to know shapeshifters/illusions/glamours/etc. on sight and tell them to better prep them/warn them
tbh they all got at least a little better at being able to tell the difference the longer they heard you point out stuff/talk abt exactly why it was off-putting
(that said some of ur heroes are better at it than others, both in general, and certain aspects of it: like Twilight isn’t able to pick up illusions/glamours for the life of him, literally, sometimes, but he is more likely to figure out shapeshifters by scent after you Guided him)
(no, your heart didnt crack a little after learning that the boys had a harder time with deceit after you stopped playing the game = “were forced to leave after their adventure” bc while they were better at detecting it, they werent on ur human level yet..)
(…the only deception you ever really fell for was Koholint. It was so painful too, because Legend quietly disclosed to you one late night that you would constantly get strange feelings/uncanny disturbances, but were never able to put a name to it for him, which both made you jumpy/paranoid on the island, but made him regret ever letting his guard down all the more or feel guilty for what felt like dismissing ur instincts the more he relaxed… Legend never doubted your sense for the uncanny ever again. He takes it seriously every time now.
When you feel as if you should apologize, he tells u not to, that these days he takes comfort in it actually, it makes him feel safer. Legend looks to your face for confirmation that something isn’t a dream, and if you look at ease, so is he.)
its the way you casually laugh at Twi being called “Wolfie” when he’s obviously a wolf-dog hybrid or just a big dog
and when everyones confused u just explain smth smth, wolf heads are larger in comparison to their body, their legs are narrow, their paws are big, dogs are like the oppposite, or way more proportional like “Wolfie” is, dogs bob around when they run like “wolfie”, and have shorter legs,
smth smth wolves cant have eye colors like blue, only dogs/wolf-dog hybrids can silly-
and Wolfie is just like, 😐 😑 😐
turning around and walking away, bc hylias knotted fucking braid- he really cant escape the dog accusations now, you literally used ur freaky truth-seeing instinct and read his shapeshifter ass from head to literal toe/paw-
Wild/Hyrule look fascinated, Wind and Legend cant breath theyre laughing so hard, Time is coughing suspiciously into his fist and pops back up smirking, Four is laughing but also encouraging you to keep going, Sky is desperately trying to keep it together while also trying to get Twi to come back lmao, Wars is literally pointing and laughing ashkljdl-
ok but Twi gets his revenge later by tricking you into yapping abt how Hyrule/Four/Time all kind of look “off” sometimes too
like how u swear Rulie is glowing subtly when the moon is full, or how the world distorts behind his back sometimes,
or how Four’s eyes change colors all the time, his fighting style looks like its rotating between 4 diff ppl’s techniques,
or how Time’s face wrinkles like smile lines/crows feet at the corner of his eyes will randomly appear and disappear, how he’ll have some stubble one day then 3 days later despite having not shaven (u literally saw him wake up and do his morning routine) it’ll disappear like it was never there in the first place-
and when Twi has stopped asking you abt the others as they all reel over the knowledge of what all u can tell abt them,
(ur quietly relieved no one asked abt Wild.
You resolve urself to just lie if anyone asks, even to Wild himself.)
hey im alive!! im slow yknow how it is,
ive been doing too much, and i cant wait to be done with this class so i can have free time guilt free again 🥲
god thats one good thing abt getting out of academia i dont miss and would only wish on my worst enemy,
the anxiety of doing smth, even necessary stuff like eating/sleeping/showering, and feeling liek you should be doing homework instead, god its so awful
cant wait to feel like an adult with my own life again lmao
that certification better work and get me a white collar job goddamit 🤞
anyway, hope ur all having a good weekend,
and just to let u know, im so happy acc that im alive to see the first zelda game that actually follows what i originally thought the plot of zelda games was when i was a kid lmao
(zelda as the protag, saving link!!)
Peace out,
🌙
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therainscene · 3 months
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I've described myself in the past as "overly-queerbaited" as a way of explaining why it took me so long to come around to Byler endgame as a legitimate possibility... but that's kind of a misleading way of putting it.
Truth is, I've always been too much of a cynical fuck to fall for queerbait... or any other story that promises positive queer rep.
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[Sherlock couldn't touch me; I saw this cringe homophobia coming from a mile away. Fans mistaking straight anxiety jokes for meaningful gay subtext was clearly doomed to end in mockery. Nobody deserved to be treated like that... but god, it was easy to predict.]
I think it's a symptom of having grown up under Section 28 -- feeling like I'm being unreasonable for wanting to see queerness normalized is such an ingrained habit that even today I instinctively recoil like a vampire touching sunlight whenever an optimistic queer story falls unrequested into my lap.
But I'm hardly alone in feeling this way -- many queer Millennial and Gen-X fans of Stranger Things are against the idea of Byler because it would ruin the catharsis of watching the gay boy growing up in the same era as we did slowly succumb to the same despair that we did.
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[For those who haven't played the VR game: Vecna is speaking in this screenshot.]
There's genuine comfort to be found in painful stories -- this type of catharsis is practically the cornerstone of horror as a genre -- so I can't really fault myself or anyone else for wanting it, despite the obnoxious oversaturation of disappointing queer endings in media.
This is the nostalgia show, after all -- and like it or not, for many middle-aged queers in the target audience, nostalgia is shot through with the pain of homophobia and loneliness.
But do you know who else is a hurt queer(-coded) adult who resents happy endings? This cynical fuck:
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Henry personifies despair and loneliness and the dark urge to take our pain out on others -- and when Will is in the picture, I would argue that he also represents internalized homophobia.
Will might represent who we were -- but Henry represents who we've let ourselves turn into.
And I don't think many of us want to admit to that, because that would involve questioning why we have so much in common with the literal villain of the show; why we're still so consumed with self-pity after 20+ years that we're obsessing over the fate of some kid.
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I'm not suggesting that wanting a less-than-fairytale ending for a fictional gay boy is equivalent to being a child killer lol. It's perfectly valid to want to see your pain acknowledged, and stories which appeal to that desire deserve to exist.
But between Henry's connection to Will and the cycle of abuse themes of the show, it's clear that this particular story simply isn't about wallowing in the bleakness of growing up gay in the 80s, but about self-actualizing in spite of it all.
So I just can't bring myself to want a "relatable" ending for Will.
As much as I struggle to enjoy positive queer rep, I don't want to be so cynical. I'd thrown up so many walls to protect myself as a teenager that I forgot how desperately I wanted to see just one of those painful queer stories end on the same uplifting note that straight stories were always entitled to: with true love overcoming the odds, saving the day, and living happily ever after.
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[But I'm A Cheerleader, a surprisingly fun movie about conversion therapy, is proof that stories like this did exist when I was a teen... but finding them in the pre- and early-internet days amidst so much censorship was a tall order.]
What makes Stranger Things different from most queer stories -- and what allowed it to pierce through my defenses and stab me in the gut -- is that it perfectly mimics those bleak, acceptable-to-the-censors stories from my youth -- only this time, the secret uplifting gay plot twist is real.
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Not for the sake of shock value or of grabbing some empty woke points at the last second, but because the plan all along was to slap the audience in the face for believing homophobic lies about the existence of queer happiness.
That's some gourmet catharsis, if you ask me.
Just the possibility that my inner child might finally be vindicated has allowed me to truly let myself want the things I want for the first time in 20 years -- and that's the first step towards finally crawling back out into the sunlight.
Happy Pride Month, everyone. 🌈
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cyberrose2001 · 1 year
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Hi hi! Your op drawings are so good?? My bby aaa drawing him (bots in gen) is so tough, I get too caught up in the details TT
Anyway, since I miss him lol I was wondering if I could request some... uh, gosh I hate this word but idk anything synonymous. Could I request pussydrunk tfp op?
Hope you're having a nice day/night btw <3
- 🍄
TFP pussydrunk!Optimus x reader
Hi hello!!I am very proud of this and it's probably up there with my list of my favourite fics I have ever written. Thank you so much for requesting and liking my silly sketches of the blorbo. I've written this as gender neutral <3
(lowkey ive been writing heaps of OP eating pussy,,, its a canon event for me i cannot intervene..... anyway its 11AM and i havent slept yet but i needed to finish hggggh *dies of horny*)
Warnings: Oral sex (reader receiving), edging, reader has a vagina.
Word count: 657
18+ ONLY! MINORS DNI
Spending time alone with you has learned to be one of Optimus' most treasured past times. But as much as it pains him, relaxing with you is a rare treat. The usual business of the base either keeps him up all night, or he genuinely has no time. However, he tries his best to make the most of it, whether he's relaxing with you, cuddling you, or with his head glued between your inner thighs. 
Like right now. It was nearing two AM. Optimus has you sprawled out on your shared berth, his face pressed against your aching heat, finally finding sweet relief from his built-up arousal. It's been too fragging long since his face was buried in you. He misses it, and if Optimus had a choice, he would sacrifice everything he's worked for to keep you bare before him.
Two hours. Optimus had been lazily lapping at you for two hours now. At one point, his helm had lulled to the side to rest against your right inner thigh to not strain his neck. His glossa grows tired, and his energon roars through his hot frame.
His stamina is almost depleted compared to when he initially delved into your drenched pussy. Despite this, Optimus still has the capacity to tightly grip your hips, gently massaging them as you lie still for him. He is weary, yet he perseveres, ignoring his aching joints and pulsing spike painfully pressed against the berth because tonight is about you. He will make up for all those lonely nights you've spent in berth alone in one lengthy oral session.
It's very often that when Optimus gives you oral, his mind feels like he's been transported to a higher plane of existence, one where he has no responsibilities or obligations to lead a team, just the mind-numbing taste of you. It makes him dizzy and light-headed, similar to the buzz he gets when he has a high grade or two, but Optimus prefers revelling in you instead to get his high. 
As ever patient as you are with your star-crossed lover, your hips still gently roll and shudder involuntarily against his glossa, and Optimus fucking loves it. He loves your soft cries when he sucks on your clit, and he loves when you clamp your legs around his helm when your orgasm is merely within reach. But he won't let you finish just yet, not when he's yet to relish and thoroughly drown himself in your sticky sweet.  
His warm optics remain lazily trained on your face, only fluttering close when you squeeze his helm. The pressure from your thighs only heightens his hunger, a carnal desire to swallow every drop of your aphrodisiac juices. 
"Mmmmm," You mewl, sweaty palms digging into the berth, "Fuck, I missed this… why don't we do this - aah - more often, baby…."
Optimus doesn't respond, and he can't because his processor is so intoxicated and aroused that he can't even form a single coherent sentence. It's quite ironic, he thinks. A mech of his nature that is so poised and articulate in his vocable is conned by his own desperate need to surrender his intake to his humans' essence.
"Mmmffh," He purrs into your heat, parting your sensitive lips with his glossa, lazily swirling around your bud before pressing a gentle kiss against it. He can't help but grind his spike into the berth below at your whimpers, servos kneading into your soft flesh, "More… Primus, I need more…."
You titter breathlessly, snaking a hand to the top of his helm to lightly press his face further into your pulsing heat, and Optimus delightfully grunts. You shiver, biting back a moan at the vibrations, "Go ahead, hun, you've got me for the rest of the night."
Optimus may need to blow a hole into the sun to prevent it from rising, since one night will never be enough to satisfy his thirst for you.
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darqx · 15 days
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HEEEY MACARENA (ALRIGHT!)
Here's some long overdue BP and HH asks :) I tend to combine the two since there's not as many as the RADs, so this starts with BP and then moves into HH/Gen qs.
BP
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MUAH ~ (I actually doodled this some time last year for fun and whimsy, based on those long mouth kiss meme pics XD)
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A very quick overview of these types!
Vescordem: Maneaters/cannibals, excessively tall and strong.
Aleores: Minor dealmakers (goods and services). Jaw can unhinge and has venomous bite.
Sollicio: Major dealmakers - soul stealing ability. Often very good looking, has ichor powers.
Voxter: Ability to project 'thoughts' into someone else's mind - you ever have an intrusive thought? Same concept. All have a unique mark across the top part of their face.
Caumacies: Maneaters/cannibals, very strong. Has a third eye which sees only in heat vision - rarely opened simultaneously with normal eyes.
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Hmm M or MA15 i think 🤔
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You know, i actually have an idea for a game that has nothing to do with anything I'm currently doing XD One day i'll actually have time to make it, maybe. But anyway currently my actual project is i'm planning on making a comic \o/
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I AM PLEASED TO ANNOUNCE that i have thumbnailed like 70 pages of this bloody thing and i'm still only in the first quarter of the planned chapters lol OTL Once i finish thumbing the chapter I'm on I plan to go back and render the pages properly before starting to post them :D
...which should hopefully give me a buffer as i repeat the process for the next chapters |D
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You know, the concept of my characs being comfort characs for someone will never get old for me. It just tickles me pink ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ This answer will have two levels to it.
It's fine to RP or ask blog with Rire - he's one of my more "known" characs thanks to BTD so as long as credit is given (and it's made clear I'm not running the blog so it's not canon) then it's cool.
I'd prefer if no ask/RP blogs are created for any of my other BP or HH characs, as they are not as known yet. This may be revisited once i actually get the BP comic out but for now it's a no, sorry! (Though, if you are RPing in like...a private Discord with other friends who know who the characs are then I'm a bit more lenient with that.)
The reason for the BP/HH level is that ages ago when I had started establishing my own characs more, I randomly happened to find a forum where someone was RPing as Izm and .D but no one else knew who the characs were and so they clearly thought the RPer was the original artist and creator. Said RPer was not dissuading anyone of that notion. That has stuck with me for forever because at the time i never anticipated that someone would...actually try and do that with an OC. Like, bro srsly?!
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One pet peeve for everyone:
.D: Willfully stupid people
Izm: .D smoking. He could care less if anyone else smokes but .D is not allowed on his watch
Marcus: Having decisions made for him without his input
Zeke: "How's the weather up there?"
Wei Ren: When people think he can't understand English cos he has an accent and so they deliberately speak slower and louder
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Geez Caleb why are you damn RUDE
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Here's one i prepared earlier! 😌
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I'm not sure why you included Marcus as a demon, he's a human lol.
HH/More Gen
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There are clubs which are created by students but need approval from the adults to exist.
HH is one of the better boarding schools which generally turn out successful alumni. The "obvious problems" we see are not actually obvious lol.
He doesn't need such manipulations.
Thanks! I hope you are inspired to go forth and create stuff! :D
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One of the only perks of being a prefect at HH, really :d
Absolutely not lol
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4. These types of qs are always amusing to me only because you guys expect me to know but i absolutely do not XDD. Do normal people actually have a fave animal?? I dont even have a fave animal!! Anyway offshoot aside sorry that i can't even randomly assign anything, but if you are interested here is what they might be AS animals lol.
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They actually don't have names because they were randomly designed NPCs i drew as like, placeholders |D;
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Not including Rire or Nurse Isla:
.D is asexual, Izm is bisexual, and everyone else is straight probably. Caleb and Desmond are violently straight (as in Des is like very 90s stoner bro adamantly vocal about being straight and Caleb will actually try and break your neck for insinuating anything).
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I have some female characs but I dont draw them that often as they are more side characs in BP and HH. The ones ive's drawn at least once are Isla (who looks like this, also doodled above), Tish (Des's sister) and Kenzie and Kelly (Zeke's sisters).
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Every once in a blue moon i get an ask saying this but whenever i go to check nothing is wrong, so...nothing is wrong they do work |D; As the age old tech saying goes have you tried turning it off and on again? :d
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Aren't those kind of things supposed to be...based on yourself??
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