#that sometimes had him not showing up that sometimes made tk doubt things he hated doubting

[theghostofashton]

thinking about how tk reacts to being called the coach's son, how upset he is, how he turns to recounting his accomplishments, trying to create that distance between them, and thinking about how many times he's done this before. what it must've been like to grow up as owen strand's son in the aftermath of 9/11. the boy whose dad saved so many people and lost his entire crew, then rebuilt his entire firehouse. thinking about how many times tk's been called the coach's son, accused of being favored because of who his dad is, unable to exist outside of owen's shadow for all incredible, wonderful, heroic reasons that somehow don't feel that way. the tension between loving his dad and being so proud of him and resenting him a little for all of it.

[morganaspendragonss]

The Broken Soul of TK Strand (1/?)

so, that bonus fic i mentioned. i cannot take credit for it - it is a translation of 'la esencia rota de tk strand' by road1985, which in turn was inspired by my fic, 'out, damned spot'

i am so grateful to the original author for not only taking the time to write something based on one of my works, but also for allowing me to discuss the plot with her and translate it into english, especially when i am still learning her language. the only thing of this that is mine is the translation, and i sincerely apologise for any mistakes on this front 💚

ao3 | 3k | hurt tk, worried carlos, rituals, kidnapping, angst and hurt/comfort

The man leaned out from the alley and watched the scene. He had spent so much time preparing, he had carefully chosen the victim from many candidates weeks ago, and now it had all gone to shit because of a cigarette and some curtains embroidered by an old woman for her grandson.

He liked the fire. It was erratic, unpredictable, and powerful, just like his Lord, just as he himself aspired to be.

He watched the flames and longed to get closer, to touch them and know first hand the home of his master. But he still wasn’t prepared; he was missing one more sacrifice, the last one. He just needed one more soul, and then the doorway to hell would be open for him.

But it wasn’t just any soul he needed; he couldn’t choose the first stranger who crossed his path. That would be too easy - his Lord had told him so in dreams. To open the door to hell, he had to find pure souls which were close to the dark side, good souls that had been through horrible experiences and whose pain could be extracted together with their body’s vital liquid.

With each one of the souls he had already extracted, he had improved the ritual a little more. It was becoming cleaner, more discrete, and it seemed that the police still hadn’t found the other three bodies. With luck, he would finish the ritual before that happened.

But because everything couldn’t be perfect, the fire had ruined his plans.

He had spent days researching the people living in that building. All of them had problems, but David Archings was his target. An orphan and divorced, it was said that his parents died because of him, and this had destroyed his marriage even though the police found no proof. Now he lived alone in a small flat where no-one ever visited him.

He was a sad man, consumed by grief, and few would miss him.

But the fire had taken him before he could do anything, and this delayed his plans.

Or not.

Whilst he watched the flames consuming the building, the firefighters arrived. They worked quickly and in a matter of minutes, the fire was under control and almost extinguished.

He hated these people who always destroyed the work of his Lord. Who were they to put out the flames of the kingdom of darkness?

On more than one occasion, he had thought out teaching the firefighters a lesson, showing that that they weren’t and never would be stronger than the power of his master.

But there were always so many of them, always with police involved. For someone who enjoyed going unseen and carrying out assignments quickly, it would be too complicated and too much work to hurt them.

Despite everything, that night, the cards played a very different hand, one which could solve all his problems.

In that first moment, he didn’t know why he noticed the young paramedic, but there had been something about that that caught his attention. He had a special aura, which changed from dark to light and dark again, depending on the moment.

It was easy to focus on him. If men interested him, he would say that he was truly attractive. If he were searching for a pretty face, there was no doubt that the boy had it. He didn’t know him at all, but he could tell that he had a sad smile which hid fear and regrets - exactly the kind of darkness that he wanted and needed.

“TK,” an older man said, one of the firefighters who, judging by the resemblance, was clearly his father. “We couldn’t have done anything even if we had arrived earlier.”

“I know, but I can’t get the idea out of my head that it was my fault we got here late.”

“It could have happened to anyone.” The older man put a hand on the boy’s shoulder. “You are one of the best firefighters I know, and now one of the best paramedics. We all have the right to make mistakes sometimes.”

The man began to see some of the darkness he needed for the ritual, but he needed more.

Another man, a police officer, came closer to the young man and opened his arms. The firefighter buried himself in them and the officer kissed his head. It was obvious that they were a couple; they weren’t hiding that they were together, and there was a great love between them. The officer was worried for the paramedic - it almost seemed like it had been taken from a romantic novel.

“Ty, your father is right. You shouldn’t blame yourself for what happened. Tommy said that the man was dead before you got here.”

“I know, but I always think that it’s not fair, that things could have gone another way.”

The man smiled; the paramedic blamed himself for these two deaths but it was easy to see that he carried more guilt inside him.

“When these things happen, I remember what happened to me. If it hadn’t been for my dad always worrying about me, I wouldn’t be here right now.”

“That’s a thing of the past and, look, thanks to it, you are here. Have you thought about it that way?” The police officer kissed him and they hugged again before leaving.

It was incredible. He had only thought about taking a soul who was close enough to what he needed. But that paramedic who had been a firefighter, that TK, was exactly what he needed. He was a broken soul, an aged vase in danger of shattering into a million pieces. A firefighter, perfect for punishing those meddlers, and, further, in a relationship with a police officer.

But he was surrounded by people and in the middle of a shift; he wouldn’t be able to take him that night. His master had taught him to have patience, so he let him go, taking note of the firefighters’ station number, so he knew where he worked.

The idea that he would have the soul he was sure was the perfect subject excited him greatly. He didn’t want any mistakes or to find him with a perfect family at home, so he decided to wait and do things right.

*

TK didn’t sleep well that night. They returned to the station after the fire, but he needed time to get to sleep and he woke up many times. When he finally did manage to sleep, he had nightmares about the idea that they could have saved those two strangers.

It wasn’t his fault, not directly at least, but if he had been ready earlier, if he hadn’t forgotten to replace the bandages in the ambulance, they would have arrived on time. Maybe then things would have turned out differently. He couldn’t be sure of course, but the nightmares did nothing but tell him just that.

He got up. Everything was still; with a little bit of luck nothing else would happen and they could finish the shift calmly and go home. But this didn’t make him feel any better, so he made himself a tea - if he had a coffee he wouldn’t be able to sleep a wink - and left the station. There were barely any buildings around it, so there was always a beautiful view of the sky.

A little while ago, they had placed some deck chairs on the small back patio and TK sat on one, with a blanket around his shoulders as it was a cool night. He drank the tea slowly as he watched the stars; they never changed, no matter what happened below. Whether people lived or died, the stars remained unshakeable and, in a certain way, this comforted him.

He liked the idea that there were things that couldn’t be changed, things that always happened in a certain way and, as much as he or anyone tried, it couldn’t change.

He closed his eyes - maybe he would be able to sleep out here, and in the worst case, he would catch a cold and spend a couple of days in bed with Carlos. That didn’t sound bad at all. TK drank the last drop of the tea and tried to relax; he had almost managed it when a noise at his back grabbed his attention.

It sounded like a crack, like branches breaking or something similar. He got up and peered into the darkness but there was no-one there and nothing moved. The sound returned, a little closer; maybe it was a wounded animal or one that was trying to get into the station’s trash in search of food.

“Hello?” TK called, only to feel like an idiot a second later; he already knew that there was no-one there.

He headed towards the trash cans but there was nothing there, and he sighed in relief - he would not have wanted a pissed-off raccoon to throw itself at him. TK turned around, but a dark figure, wearing a large coat or cape that didn’t even show a centimetre of skin, appeared in front of him.

“Who are you?” he asked, taking a step back and throwing two of the dumpsters to the floor.

He received no response other than seeing the gleaming edge of a knife the man had taken from under his clothes as he approached him.

The station lights turned on - throwing the dumpsters had raised the alarm. The stranger turned - he wouldn’t be able to do what he wanted, but before Paul and Judd arrived, he used the knife against him. TK raised his arm in defence and shouted at the sensation of the blade cutting his skin. He stumbled backwards and fell to the floor, but no-one was there save for his friends running towards him.

“TK, are you okay? What happened?”

He looked around him, but the stranger had already managed to disappear. “Where did he go?”

“Who? Hey, that cut looks bad,” Judd said, helping him to his feet.

“There was someone here, he attacked me with a knife.”

Owen and the others arrived a moment later, and searched the station, but found no-one. Judd pushed TK to go back inside so that Tommy could treat his arm.

“It’s not a deep cut, but it has nicked a couple of veins so it looks worse than it is,” his captain said as she finished bandaging his arm. “You said that a hooded stranger did this? It’s possible that you tripped and cut it on glass or a broken bottle.”

“There was someone in front of me, he had a knife.”

“Something tells me that the fire today affected you a lot,” Owen said behind him. “Captain Vega, don’t you think it would be a good idea for him to go home and rest?”

“No! I’m fine, really. That man attacked me and then disappeared.”

But they forced him to go home.

Carlos was waiting for him; he had been asleep but he always left the sound on his phone in case anything happened to TK. Judd had called him and told him what had happened and that TK had been put in a car home.

He met him at the door, barely having time to prepare himself before TK was hugging him.

“I’m not crazy, babe, and the fire didn’t affect me so much that I’m having hallucinations of people attacking me.”

“Shhh, I know. I know you’re not crazy.” Carlos left kisses on TK’s forehead and cheek, and did the same when he took his hands, kissing the palms and the back as he led him to the sofa. “You need to sleep and relax. We’ll talk about it tomorrow.”

“But…”

“But nothing, baby. Sleep, and I’ll stay awake so no-one else tries to hurt you.”

TK wasn’t sure if Carlos believed him or not, but he always felt safe in his arms. He let go and, without bothering to change his clothes, curled up next to Carlos on the sofa. He sighed, feeling his arms surrounding him, and closed his eyes.

They were all right about something - between the last shift and what had happened by the dumpsters, he was exhausted and needed sleep, so it wouldn’t hurt to do it.

When he woke up, Carlos was still awake, reading. By the yawn he gave, it was clear that he had fulfilled his promise and not slept all night.

“Are you feeling better?”

TK looked at his arm, hoping that what had happened the previous night had been a dream. But the bandage was still there.

He nodded. It was stupid to think that someone wanted to hurt him, or that they’d wait around the station until dawn to do it. Maybe it was true, maybe he had had a nightmare about the fire and ended up cutting himself with glass, like Tommy had said.

The kiss to his cheek brought him back to reality.

“Should I make breakfast?”

“We could do it together?” TK offered, but Carlos clicked his tongue and laughed. “Okay, sorry, what I meant is that you make breakfast and I’ll lend a hand.”

“Perfect.” With another kiss to the forehead, Carlos circled his waist and made him get up. He looked happy, with that warm, perfect smile that made TK feel as if nothing could go wrong. “What’s up? Why are you looking at me like that?” Carlos asked.

TK shook his head and the smile returned. His arm didn’t hurt and the fear of the hooded stranger disappeared all at once. He took Carlos’s hand to go to the kitchen and they spent the next hour making a breakfast that, between laughs, games, caresses, and a round of sex on the kitchen island, ended up more on them instead of being eaten.

“Happy anniversary,” Carlos whispered in TK’s ear, feeling the fast beat of his heart.

“Oh, are you serious? We’ve been together for a year today?”

“You forgot, right?”

“Babe, I’m so sorry, I… No, I did forget, but I’ll make it up to you.”

Carlos took off his flour-covered shirt and gave him a quick kiss. “You don’t have to, don’t worry,” he said, before heading to the bathroom.

“Carlos, babe, wait.” TK tugged at him. “Everything’s been so perfect with you. And it’s gone so fast too. When we started dating for real, I didn’t want to give myself hope that we would last and I decided to take it day by day. I was always scared that…”

Carlos took his face in both hands. “I’m not Alex, nor could I ever be Alex.” He never lost his smile; even now that he was hurt, he kept smiling and kissing TK. “And I’m going to be here, with you, forever. I love you, Ty. I love you so much, so I’m going to carry on as if I hadn’t heard anything, and I’ll wait for you at the precinct at six tonight so we can celebrate our anniversary.”

“Okay, though what we just did…”

“That was just the appetiser. Babe, you have no idea what I have prepared for tonight.”

*

TK worked that shift like normal, though every once in a while, he looked at his arm. He’d convinced himself that it was impossible that someone would have attacked him. Why go to the station to hurt him? Why him? It didn’t make sense.

Luckily, the shift was quiet and it enabled him to rest; they only went on one call and the rest of the day, Tommy and his father both told him to take it easy. But now that he wasn’t thinking about the fire, he couldn’t get out of his head how bad Carlos must be feeling after TK forgot their anniversary.

He had to do something, to somehow make it up to him.

“Can I leave a little early today?” he asked Captain Vega, before telling her everything that had happened.

“Go, buy him something pretty - forgetting the first anniversary is very serious.”

*

He had studied the area, parking the car somewhere that wouldn’t appear suspicious, but also a place where he could see the soul he lacked.

His blood was perfect; the ritual he had done last night had been a success, and its taste was exquisite. Now all that was left was to take him and prepare him for the final ritual.

He had decided to wait until his shift was over, but there was no doubt that fate was helping him, as he saw him leave two hours early. He got out of the car, seeing him put in his headphones, and raised his hood to avoid the wind.

“Hey, TK!” a voice behind them said, the only thing that hadn’t gone as he expected, the only thing that made him improvise.

He hid the syringe he carried in his jacket pocket and, gripping tightly to the iron bar he’d found nearby, hit his victim in the head.

TK fell to the floor, sounds reverberating around him, barely able to see anything other than white lights.

“He’s already left,” said another voice inside the station.

“I’m… I’m here. Help,” TK breathed, his voice barely there. Even that was painful as he watched the stranger, the same from the previous night, approached him with an iron bar in his hand. “Dad… Judd… Please.”

“For the return of the Great Dark Lord,” said the other man, closing the gap that separated him from TK. He knelt in front of him and placed the iron on his chest. “For the Lord of the Dark to walk the earth, you will give your life, your blood, and your soul. You are the fourth chosen. The fourth cardinal point to mark his return.”

“Please, you’re wrong… I’m not the one you’re looking for.”

“You are. Soon you will see.”

Before TK could say anything else, a second blow to his head left him sprawled on the ground, like a broken toy.

[kiras-sunshine]

I’m gonna hold onto your heart for sure

Written for day 3 of  Carlos Reyes Week: “well, that just happened” + friendship

Summary:

“It’s not out of obligation or anything like that,” he says immediately, “we are friends, no matter what. Besides, you’re basically part of the team, like an honorary member of the 126.” 

on ao3

or

Carlos is surprised to find Paul, leaning against his blue Camaro outside the police station when he finally gets off from shift.

The sun is already setting, painting the whole yard of the police station in golden light.

Paul’s face lights up when he spots him near the doors, and he gives him a small wave. He has changed out of his uniform, but he is still wearing dark pants and AFD t-shirt.

He tries to go through in his mind if he has forgotten any plans they might have made when he walks up to the car and him. He cannot come up with anything, but he is still glad to see him.

“Hey, everything okay?” He asks, mostly out of habit. He looks fine and he guesses he wouldn’t be grinning that widely if something atrocious had happened.

“Yeah,” he agrees and claps his hand on his shoulder. “Just checking up if you’re moping like a lovesick puppy,” he jokes.

Carlos flashes a smile, but he shakes his head as he glances their shoes. “I’m not.”

TK had to leave up to New York to attend his cousin’s wedding. He had been invited too as a plus one, but he couldn’t get four days off from work, and TK had assured that he was completely fine going there alone too, but he misses him.

It has been three days, which is ridiculous considering how much he wants to see him and longs to have him back in Austin. He cannot remember when he would have missed someone this much, and it almost terrifies him a little.

Obviously, they have been texting and calling, but it still isn’t the same thing.

“TK seemed pretty miserable when I called him,” he shrugs, with innocent smile, “just saying.”

He just huffs at that, amusedly, as he tries to fish out his car keys from the pocket of his jeans.

“Also, it’s family dinner today, so I’m picking you up. Well, I don’t have a car ‘cause Marjan just dropped me here on the way to supermarket, but still, the point stands.”

The 126 has created a tradition of having a proper, full-scale dinner once a week. The time and day changes, adapting to their shifts, but they never fail to have one. Owen has dubbed it as a family dinner for team bonding reasons. He has attended it a couple times with TK, but he feels like it’s a quite accurate term.

The crew definitely is a family, and they care each other a lot and deeply, and there is so much love and affection in the air when they don’t have to worry about getting called to scenes, and they always have each other’s backs.

He is almost a little jealous of the bond they all share.

He lets out a small laughter and fidgets with his car keys. “That’s nice but you don’t have to--,” he starts, but Paul is gesturing him to stop talking.

“It’s not out of obligation or anything like that,” he says immediately, “we are friends, no matter what. Besides, you’re basically part of the team, like an honorary member of the 126.”

He would be lying if he said that hearing that wouldn’t make him feel fondness towards the entire team and it makes him feel cared for and a little special. He knows he generally gets along with people well and he has no issues making friends, but he has been missing Michelle and he appreciates it more than he can say that he has become friends with everyone in the team and they aren’t just tolerating him for the sake of TK.

“Okay,” he agrees.

Spending the evening with friends and eating a proper dinner definitely beats his plans of cleaning his apartment and ordering takeout.

“Yeah,” Paul laughs and before Carlos knows he has been pulled into a tight hug. It’s surprisingly comforting hug despite the fact that it’s short and brief.

“Well, that just happened,” he says, and there is a certain edge of uncertainness that wasn’t there before, with apologetic expression when he lets go off him. “Sorry, got carried away.”

“Hey, we’re friends, friends get hugged,” he tells him, immediately, resting his hand on his shoulder.

He isn’t maybe the most tactile person in the world, but sometimes it is easier to say something through touch than words and he firmly believes in hugging.

“Yeah,” Paul agrees, softly and his grin is back and already brighter. He nods towards his car. “Let’s go. Cap won’t like if we are late.”

***

Carlos isn’t sure if his stomach hurts because all of the food he has eaten or because of all the laughter. The food was delicious and there was way too much of it, and they had been talking about everything that came to mind. They had been sharing anecdotes of work and what their lives had been like before they arrived in Texas and the firehouse.

The 126 is back on shift in a couple of hours, and the whole team, except Owen, has sprawled on the couches, trying to survive their food comas. Judd and Mateo are talking about basketball, deep in their conversation and Marjan is showing Paul some video on his phone, and they all seem content in the moment, and the whole room is filled with laughter and chatter.

Carlos smiles as he looks at them, but his phone starts to vibrate in his pocket. He quietly slips away and walks towards the doors to get some more privacy. It’s basically all for nothing because the firehouse been built so that privacy is almost non-existent. Especially with this particular team.

“Hey,” he says, when the video call connects and he sees TK’s tired, but beaming face on his phone screen.

“Hey,” he says back, but tilts his head and squints his eyes at him. “Is that a fire truck?”

He turns his phone a little, so that he gets a glimpse of the bright red side of the truck. “Yeah.”

His grin gets wider. “Missing me that much?“

“Yeah,” he breathes out, with genuine laughter, “also Paul dragged me to the dinner.”

“Oh yeah, the family dinner. I should’ve remembered,” he says, as he runs his hand through his hair, making it stick up slightly. “That’s nice.”

“It is,” he says, sincerely. “I wish you were here with us.”

It’s nice that he is, in their eyes too, his own person outside of their relationship. He knows they are close, and they still keep complaining when they will grow out of their honeymoon stage, but he still knows how to be his own person and he doesn’t feel less whole without him. He feels that together they are something more, but not lacking otherwise either.

“Me too,” he admits under his breath, “we do have pretty great friends.”

It feels like an understatement but it’s still true. “Yeah,” he says, nodding. The corner of his mouth twitches into a gradual smile. “Your dad promised to teach me how to bake a sugar free key lime pie.”

It makes him laugh, and it’s such a beautiful sound and he would gladly spend rest of his life listening to it. His eyes are glistering with what looks like happiness. “He doesn’t teach just anyone,” he points out. “Kitchen is like a sacred place for him. He certainly hasn’t taught baking to anyone I have dated.”

“Yeah,” he says, rubbing his neck.

He likes Owen, and he feels like they would get along even if he wasn’t dating his son, but it is sort of a big deal for him that he seems to like him, too. He knows he doesn’t need anyone else’s approval, but he still loves the fact that all of them just took him in as one of their own.

“Also,” he starts, and points at the screen with grimace on his face, “his sugar-free key lime pie is terrible. It tastes like flour, so good luck.”

“Ah, I’ll just make the others eat most of it. Practice the fine art of guilt tripping,” he deadpans, but it is getting impossible to hold back the smile.

“Good strategy.”

“Your dad misses you, too,” he points out softly, “he had a baby pic of you on the dinner table.”

He had placed the framed picture on the spot that he usually sits on. It had been mostly a joke, a way to boost the team morale, but he had noticed how many times Owen had glanced at the picture during the dinner. The picture had been of TK, barely standing on his own, grabbing leg of a table and he was wearing orange overalls and grinning as widely as a one year old can.

TK groans, and he cannot help but chuckle. “It’s on the wall now. According to them, they have put it high enough so you cannot take it down when you get back.”

“I hate them all,” he mutters, but there is no heat behind his voice.

“You were a cute baby,” he adds, just because he can.

“I wasn’t,” he insists, “especially if it was the orange overalls picture.”

“It was, but I guess I have to ask him to show me the entire photo albums,” he says, mostly just teasing him and mostly because he genuinely wants to see the photos.

“Please don’t,” he says, but the amusement shines through his voice. “He would love it.”

It would probably take hours, but he might do it one day when he has time.

“How’s the wedding?”

“Good, it has been nice seeing everyone,” he tells him, sounding genuinely happy. Carlos knows he hasn’t seen his mother’s side family in years. “It would be more fun if you were there. They all keep asking about you.”

“I’m sorry for not making it,” he says, gently.

He would have loved to go with him, but the wedding had seemed a little like a last-minute thing for him, and the invitation had come in mail just a couple weeks before and there was no way he could have managed to change all of his shifts.

“Hey, I didn’t mean it as a jab,” he remarks, softly.

“I know.”

“It’s mostly just funny. I head a bunch of my aunts talking and doubting if you’re even real because you sound a little too perfect, and that if you’re real, how did you end up with me,” he explains with a huff, but his voice sounds amused and there is certain mischief in his eyes.

“You could tell them that I’ve a very specific type,” he jokes, because he can feel the warmth creeping up on his neck.

He knows how to accept a compliment, but perfect definitely isn’t a word he would associate with himself, let alone expect a bunch of people he has never met to describe him as such.

“What would that be?”

Before he has any chance to answer, he spots Judd walking towards him and he claps both of his hands on his shoulders and flashes a smile at the phone screen. “Rude green-eyed firefighters who don’t let their family know they are calling,” Judd quips into their conversation.

TK is laughing again, but he is definitely delighted to see him, too. “I feel like you can find twelve of those in a dozen.”

“More like once in a lifetime,” Carlos murmurs, as rest of the team swarms in and forms a sort of half-circle around them. He knows TK hears him, because he holds his gaze, and his face softens. His smile is tiny but genuine and he feels like it’s only reserved for him.

“Ugh, you’re too sappy,” Marjan complains, but she ends up sounding mostly fond.

Carlos tries to hold up his phone high enough that he manages to see everyone. They keep waving at him, and he looks genuinely touched. “I’m glad you’re there.”

“We are glad to have him,” Mateo pipes in.

“We miss you,” Paul adds, “but we think we like Carlos better,” he says, deadpan.

“Cannot blame you for having good taste,” he shoots back, with a wink, and suddenly the warm feeling in his neck creeps back up.

“At least he knows how to cook, unlike certain someone,” Marjan says, with a glare that doesn’t linger on her face.

“Hey, the casserole I made last week was edible,” TK argues.

“Yeah, kid. Edible, not good,” Judd says with deep sounding laughter.

“It made my stomach feel funny,” Mateo admits, sounding a little distraught.

“Even Buttercup didn’t eat it,” Paul reminds him.

“Y’all are so ungrateful,” he says, with mock exasperated sigh as he stares beyond his phone, but amusement doesn’t disappear from his eyes.

Carlos knows that TK’s culinary skills are common joke for them, and he can admit he shouldn’t be allowed anywhere near kitchen and unfortunately, he had gotten the leftovers of the casserole too. It had been dry and tasteless, but he still he had eaten it.

“I wouldn’t have eaten it if it wasn’t made by you,” he admits, too.

“Ah, blinded by love,” Judd says, shaking his head.

“You’ll end up with food poisoning,” Marjan tells him, as she pokes him in the arm.

Before he has any chance to reply, TK looks like he is listening to someone speak in the other end of the call. He flashes them a smile. “Sorry, I gotta go. Carlos, I love you. The rest of you are okay, I guess,” he jokes in a light tone, and his smile is so wide and genuine that it definitely reaches his eyes.

His crew fake exasperation around him, but they all end up erupting in laughter and keep telling TK how much they miss him before they manage to actually end the call.

[lilywoood]

You’ve got a Mail 1/?

Hi guys I’m back from my little hiatus, I want to thank you for bearing with me, for your support all along that painful time of my life, I want to thank you for all the love you gave to my family and I, most of all I want to thank you for your patience so here it is my new project, my ideal crossover, here is the surprise I was preparing hoping that you’ll come to like it and that you’ll want to embark in this new journey. ♥️♥️♥️

If you like it and want to be tagged in futur part hit my askbox ♥️♥️.

Tag list : @felicitous-one, @translucent-bisexual @cherishingstydia @diazbuckleysworld @chrrlees @justsmilestuffhappens @comablog2 @hardychick89

Word count : 1543

Song : When the party’s over - Billy Eilish

“Hello my name is Evan “Buck” Buckley, I’m a 28 Virgo firefighter in LA and I recently was diagnosed with severe PTSD”

Buck sighed looking at his computer screen, like every nights for the past three weeks he was writing and deleting the same message, battling with himself about wether he should post it or not, wondering if it would really help, if they were really people out there who could understand him, support him, comfort him... and just like every nights he resigned himself, he deleted the message, closed his laptop and went straight to his fridge shoulder slumped and a tired chuckle escaping his lips, he knew better than hoping, hope was for dreamers, for idealists, for the old Buck, not for the new him, the adult Buck, Buck 2.5.

Throwing a quick glance at the clock above the fridge he noticed how it was a little close to 2a.m, he knew he should probably get back to sleep, try to get some rest so that he would be fully efficient, so that he wouldn’t give his team another reason to criticize him, another reason to blame him if something were to go wrong.

It was an impossible task, sleeping didn’t mean rest anymore, sleeping was akin to torture for Buck, sleeping meant reliving the bombing, it meant that his left leg will start to ache, would get numb, it meant he would start to feel the heaviness of the truck, that his ears would start to buzz, that his breathing would get harder because the aches were clogging his lungs, and then water would replace the aches, then he’ll hear himself scream Christopher’s name but Christopher never called back, he was never saved...

His eyes kept on going from his couch to the six pack in the fridge, he was tempted to drink it all, tempted to down it until he passed out, after all passing out was not far from sleeping except that they won’t be nightmares, flashes, screams, passing out meant a dreamless sleep and that what he needed, what he yearned...

He wasn’t thrilled to get to work that morning, his head was pounding thanks to a raging headache and his muscles were sore due to the accumulation of sleepless nights....

He tiredly went through his morning routine, first a little run around his block, then a quick shower followed by breakfast and swallowing all the pills his therapist prescribed, final with little to no motivation got ready for work, already knowing what was awaiting him at the firehouse, knowing that they were going to make assumptions of how bad he looked...

He knew he looked like shit he felt like it too, that didn’t meant it was okay for people to remind him how bad it was, still he could already hear them, hear the critics, the whispers, could feel the glares...

He didn’t want to go, didn’t want to face them but he had to, he had to prove them he deserved his place, prove them he was right, show them he wasn’t a petulant kid, he was a fighter, a survivor, a warrior.

It’s been two months since he’s been reinstated, two months since he was ostracized, two months of nasty comments, two months of cold shoulders, two months of isolation, two months of loneliness.

If he was his old self he would have been gutted by it, he would have tried to win them back, would have been crawling at their feet begging for forgiveness , but he wasn’t Buck 2.0 anymore, gone was his childlike naivety, gone was his tendency to forgive and forget, he was like them now, an adult, a grown up forged by deception and betrayal, set on fighting for what was right, for what he deserved, he wasn’t going to beg, wasn’t going to forgive, he was fighting now, proving himself and not letting any of them makes him doubt his decisions, his choices they could either accept it or get lost.

He was always the first to get to the station, it was a decision he’d made three days after his reinstatement, after he overheard some of his teammates protest over his comeback, after he heard Chim and Eddie joke about how he wouldn’t make it till the end of the shift, after he heard them bet on what his next injury would be and if this time he would finally understand that he wasn’t meant to be a firefighter.

He never felt as betrayed and hurt as that day, never felt so much hate, bitterness and resentment for people he loved, admired, cherished, it wasn’t their comments, their glares and badmouthing that made him detest them, it was how they turned his love and respect for them into animosity, loathing, venom.

He was well entranced in reorganizing the inventory when he heard them, the taunting sound of their laughers.

He felt a shiver run down his spine, he felt his heart clenching in his chest, he felt stupid and ridiculous, it was pathetic how much he missed and loathed them.

It was close to lunch break when Hen joined him in the room, he was recounting the numbers of gauzes when she taped him on his shoulder making him jump back .

-Hey Buck, she smiled taking place next to him, didn’t saw you up here, she mentioned.

-Yeah, he shrugged, I didn’t, he stammered, I didn’t really felt like eating today, he chuckled still focused on his counting.

-You know avoiding us....avoiding them, she frowned, it won’t fix things, she offered

-I heard them, Buck whispered facing her, I heard them joke about how I wasn’t fit for this job, he snorted, how I was a walking disaster.

-Oh Buck, she gasped, I’m sure they didn’t...

-They meant it Hen, he cut, they meant every damn words, he growled stopping himself when he noticed her flinching, sorry, he croaked, god I’m such a mess, he mumbled kneeling down.

-Hey no no, she interrupted him, no need, to apologize, she reassured him, Buckaroo, she called softly, I’m not mad at you, she grinned.

-I’m just... it’s just I’m cranky cause I didn’t sleep well, he croaked, sorry I took it on you.

-You’re still having nightmares , she remarked sadly.

-I’m kinda used to them now, he tried to joke.

-Did you told someone about it, she frowned.

He nodded his eyes fixed on some stain on the floor, Hen bumped their shoulders accepting his sudden silence.

-I go to therapy twice a week, he whispered, I have a treatment, he pursued, but sometimes even the strongest medications can’t keep the brain from remembering, he admitted.

-I take that therapy doesn’t help, she stated.

-It help more than I though, he objected, it’s just sometimes I’d like to talk about it with someone that could relate to me.

-Someone with who you could share it without feeling analyzed, she nodded in understanding, did you told this to your therapist, she asked.

-Yes, he chucked, she, he cleared his throat, actually she...she tried to get me to join some sort of online therapy group, he frowned, for people with PTSD.

-And that’s not your thing, she guessed, Buck shrugged not knowing how to explain himself, is it the internet thing or the fact that it’s with people you don’t know, she pursued.

-I assumed that if I needed to talk about it, you guys would have my back, he wheezed, but then it all went wrong, he sniffed, and the only person that could understand me, the only person I could talk with now hates my gut, he gasped, so tell me how can I rely on strangers when my own friends turned their back on me, he smiled tears rolling down his cheeks.

-I’m not turning my back on you, Hen declared hugging him tightly, you have me and Karen if you need, she offered, but Buck, she added, maybe you should give that online thing a shot until things get better here, she offered before the alarm went off forcing her to leave him behind.

The rest of his day went smoothly, the 118 spend their shift having calls after calls, meaning that he never had to cone across one of them much to his relief, still Hen words have been playing in his head all day, that’s how he found himself glaring at his computer screen once he got home.

He was reading over and over the message he was about to post, trying to come up with an excuse, with anything that could make him delete it once more, but when he closed his eyes to think about it all he could see were the flashes, the memories, the reminders, he needed help, he needed friends and support and if his surrogate family couldn’t give it to him then maybe he could find it in the comfort of strangers.

So with trembling fingers and an over beating heart he clicked send, he took the leap and was rewarded mere seconds later with a new message less shorter than his, and a bit warmer, he took it as a sign that his wish, his prayer has finally been heard.

“Hi Buck my name is Tyler Kennedy “TK” Strand, I’m a 26 Scorpio firefighter in Austin, I’m also struggling with PTSD among other things, so if you ever wanna chat don’t hesitate”

[let-me-be-your-comet]

There's been a lot of questionable behavior in the fanbase lately - I understand emotions are running high. But certain people, in my opinion, are losing sight of the cause and unintentionally damaging the cause.

The thing is, Tana probably knew Brandon was working on his own statement, which was LotF. And ALL she wanted to ask was...'hey, I'm not famous, but surely there's something I can do to help, what can I do?' And people completely ignored her own voice, her own power, as her own person, and immediately (and for a lot of them, exclusively) told her to talk to Brandon and make him say something instead. That's fucked up with a capital F. She has a hell of a lot on her plate as it is, she absolutely does not need us adding to it and I'm appalled that some people don't see the problem with that.

As for the situation in general, these are my thoughts...people were so quick to doubt, and I don't understand why. There was so much jumping to conclusions, assuming 'they're not gonna say anything, they must be against BLM!!', even though we have a decade+ of hard evidence they fall on the liberal side of the spectrum. Hell, Brandon is on record about abortion, of all things, as a very religious Mormon. So it really boggles my mind that so many people jumped straight to 'oh god they're racist, they're against Black Lives Matter' as opposed to 'Maybe they're taking their time, gathering their thoughts, gaining perspective'.

Obviously what they did takes time, and frankly they were very quick - I'd like to see one of the 'tHeY wErE tOo LaTe' people rewrite a song in under a week! Such a heartfelt, beautifully genuine statement they issued, in the format Brandon has always turned to when he really cares and doesn't want to fuck it up by talking.

The band provided a very clear statement with zero room for misinterpretation. Their positive stance on Black Lives Matter is crystal clear in that song, and still so many people - who claim to be on the same side as the band - are spewing hate at them and at anyone who dares to confront or argue with them, all while claiming to be against hate...Instagram in particular is very hostile right now.

It's unproductive, unhelpful, and frankly very damaging to the movement they claim to support - it discourages people who actually do agree with the message from speaking out, because people see that and they internalize this: not only are they going to have to deal with people on the other side attacking them (which is, of course, a given), now they have to be attacked by people ON THE SAME SIDE who say they didn't do enough, they didn't make a statement in precisely the same way they wanted? Nothing is ever enough!

It is okay to say 'hey, the song is great, and I appreciate what you've done, but I was hoping you guys would provide resources as well - here is a link to donate/learn more if anyone wants it!'

It blows my mind, however, that the majority of the comments were outright vitriolic. Those people were not providing constructive criticism. 'OPEN YOUR WALLET' is not a valid response. It's a very peculiar type of gatekeeping, to belittle and bully those on your own side of a cause (fans included).

Curiously, I went through all the comments on their FB post and their Insta post yesterday, and found exactly TWO comments from people who were against the BLM movement and we're angry that the band supported it. TWO. Out of over a thousand comments between the platforms, only two people were against the movement. All the 'god I'm so disappointed in you guys, what the fuck, this is pathetic, this is lip service', whatever the fuck they wanted to say...all of that came from people who were claiming to be on the same damn side as the band, and yet they're spitting venom at their peers for not advocating in a way that fits their apparently extremely narrow definition of activism. How does that benefit the cause? How does that move anything forward? How does that encourage others to speak out, how does that make them feel safe enough to do so?

It doesn't. People already know that by speaking up on potentially divisive issues they're going to face hostility from people on the other side of the fence...so why are people choosing to attack their friends, their allies, those who stand for the same values as they claim to represent?

We know the people in this band, we know where their hearts are. They're good people. They've spent years filling their music with empathy, with compassion. Brandon spent years tracking down people he'd hurt in the band's early years and apologizing to them (sometimes even in public), he has very open about his flaws as a person and his quest to grow and leave them behind, from being an outspoken stuck-up little shit to not being the husband he should have been in earlier TK days.

Brandon at least is on record about pretty much every issue under the sun including abortion...and yet so many people readily turned their backs on them simply because they took longer than a day to post a heartfelt, thoughtful statement.

Before they put out LotF 2, I 100% understood being disappointed - I was a little disappointed myself, but I had enough trust and faith in them as people, in their history, to believe that they would make a statement when they were ready. At no point, though, has this matter been worth the anger some people are flinging at it. That energy would be better spent writing politicians or protesting themselves, not harrassing the band (and their families- such a huge red line).

They took the time they needed and they produced a statement which is clear, moving, and very thoughtful. The song speaks for itself. We have no right to demand more and to insult Brandon and Ronnie and Tana - or any others who speak out on behalf of this cause or any other - for not doing as we may think they should, for not doing it "right".

The band has no obligation at all to make everything a public statement simply because they're celebrities - they choose to speak out, but they're also just regular people and they have a right to live their lives as regular people in any way they can. There is no single right way to show support for a cause. They don't have to tell us that they've donated. If they did, we'd just have people saying 'ok how much? It's not enough' or 'only $X?! That's pennies to you!' If they gave people a link to donate, that'd be attacked as well because 'what did you donate then? How much? Why should I donate if you won't say you did/if you only donated X amount and you're worth Y amount'...there is no way to win with some people. They have a right to donate in private or to contribute in other ways, which they have clearly done. They gave us a beautiful statement, their position is clear as day. They've taken a stand.

We know their hearts are in the right place - privately, as is their right as human fucking beings. It's so disappointing and so disgusting - some seriously were willing to just throw their whole history out the window, ready to skewer them. Absolutely unbelievable. This band is made up of decent people - they have shown so much empathy and compassion, desire to grow and be better as human beings, in what they say, how they act, the music they make - for YEARS and yet people were ready to go for their heads at the slightest opportunity...and still, they are spreading hate in the comments, attacking anyone who dares to confront or argue with them. I've never been so disappointed and disgusted by a fanbase before. I've had the misfortune to be around for blowups like this before, for other artists, but never one with this little justification.

There's really not very much that is "problematic" about The Killers these days, yet some people seem to have decided to actively try to find things to complain about, even if they support the same cause. It's baffling.

I'm all for acknowledging when there is something worth calling them out on, but to me...this is not one of those things. The most problematic, anger-inducing thing I can think of is not giving Sarah Junker photo passes (and let me tell you, I have a big problem with that!)

So I just...I really don't get it. Trying to tear down artists and their families, fellow fans...that is not the point of fandom to me. The point of being a fan, the joy in it, that comes from supporting the artist and being kind to the rest of the fanbase, which a lot of The Killers "fans" seem to be struggling with right now.

[fucking-zawa-sensei]

Tagged by @elillierose​ thank you so much! This is so fun. I love gushing about fandoms, haha. 

Rules: Choose any three fandoms (in any order), answer the questions and tag people you want to get to know better.

My chosen 3 fandoms:

Boku no Hero Academia

Darker Than Black

Angel Beats!

The first character you loved:

Aizawa, I’ve gushed 1000 times over about this man, so I’ll keep it short. Dedicated, self-sacrificing, tragic, trickster, the list goes on. 

Hei, my heart hurts just hearing his name. I don’t know how to describe Hei other than a determined, reserved man with too much weight on his shoulders. 

Hinata, a wonderful, funny, happy-go-lucky guy with a heart so painstakingly big it kills me. 

The character you never expected to love so much:

Midoriya, haha. I rarely read or watch a show and actually like the main character. I was pleasantly surprised that Izuku was a funny, relatable kid with a well balanced personality. He wasn’t over the top like so many other main characters tend to be. 

Amber, for obvious reasons. I can’t say much about her without spoiling things, but she really wasn’t what I thought she was going to be. 

Yuri. She seemed like a bit of a Haruhi Suzumiya character, but I ended up really liking her in the end. 

The character you relate to most:

HA I relate to my headcanons of who Present Mic is the most, but none of that is confirmed in the manga. So, in reality, probably Uraraka. Bubbly, outgoing, says whatever comes to her head even when she probably shouldn’t...haha. 

Gosh, I don’t know that there’s anyone to relate to in Darker Than Black. It’s all just very sad...probably Misaki for how awkward she cant be sometimes. 

Hinata. He’s so hilarious and seems to have the worst luck, but he’s also really passionate and loyal and willing to do whatever it takes to help the people he cares about.  

The character you’d slap:

Mineta. I’m sneering as I say his name. Shoot him to the sun. 

Gai Kurusawa. Ugh. I dreaded whatever happened when he was on screen. 

I don’t want to slap anyone in this show. Every character had redeemable traits and Angel Beats! did a great job of showing everyone’s backstory. I would rather hug them all and say I’m sorry they had such hard lives. I might slap Naoi a bit for being so damn overdramatic sometimes though. 

Three favourite characters (in order of preference):

Aizawa, Present Mic, Uraraka (THE LAST ONE WAS SO HARD TO PICK)

Hei, Yin, Mao (I would go to the end of the world for these three)

Hinata, Yui, TK (I’m not sure any character has ever made me laugh as much as TK, what even was his character, like a 3x more extreme Present Mic????)

A character you liked at first but don’t anymore:

I don’t know if I’d say I “don’t like” him at all, but Kaminari is fading on me the more he aligns with Mineta. 

None. I just hate Gai but no one has been dragged down there with him. 

None? I couldn’t even pick someone to slap. 

A character you did not like at first but do now:

YOU ALL ARE GONNA KILL ME I thought Todoroki was too much of a cliche “tough guy with tragic backstory” character at first, but he had such good character development and I love his little comments and the faces he makes in the back of the panels. He says some really sweet things and makes the funniest deadpan comments. He’s a precious baby. I’m sorry I doubted him. 

Huang. He made some really jerkish, off-hand, careless comments, but at the end of the day, he showed he actually cared about contractors. He’s still not my favorite person, but I don’t hate him. 

Angel (Kanade). Despite being pretty much one of the most important characters in the show, I found her character to be flat and I felt like the writers were trying to make me like her and sympathize with her with too much of a heavy hand, but as I got to know her more, her character grew on me and I love her now. 

Three OTPs:

I literally only ship erasermic in this fandom. I’m not really interested in anything else? I guess I think the Momo/Jirou thing is cute though?

I don’t ship anyone in this show...how could I? Have you seen it? There’s no time for love here. 

I SHIPPED HINATA AND YURI AND NO ONE ELSE DID. I realize that Hinata and Yui are also a great pair, so they’re my second OTP, but because of this OTP, no one saw how much Hinata seemed to clearly love Yuri? UGH. MY HEART. Also, Kanada and Otonashi, perhaps the only ship I ever shipped that was canon. 

I would like to tag: @burrito-aizawa-sensei , @aizawashovta , @immmaghost (or @nat-the-ghost whichever you prefer), @fermatablog

[morganaspendragonss]

Bad Things Happen Bingo Masterpost!

And that's a wrap on my @badthingshappenbingo card! Thanks to anybody and everybody who requested a square - this has been so, so fun! I've had this card for years and have been actively working on it for a year and a half, so it's incredible to have finally finished it 🥰

Prompts and Fills listed below the cut:

Used in Sacrifice/Ritual - Filled

you would be the one to rescue me | BBC Atlantis | Jason x Pythagoras

When Jason wakes, Pythagoras is gone.

This in itself is not so strange. What is strange, however, is that his cloak has been left behind despite there being a significant chill in the air. And when Hercules begins to wake, and there is still no sign, Jason knows.

Something's wrong.

Rage Against the Reflection - Filled

out, damned spot | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

TK wakes up gasping, choking on air. The sheets are suffocating him and, when he tries to free himself, they only seem to get tighter. The hands reaching out for him, trying to calm him, are the final straw; TK throws himself from bed and sprints to the bathroom, slamming and locking the door behind him as he collapses against the sink.

On some level, he is aware that the hands were Carlos’s, that the sheets were theirs, that his hands are clean, and that the dream was just a dream.

But they weren't always that way.

Falling Through the Ice - Filled

ice in my veins | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Carlos only turns away for a second, he swears. Unfortunately, a second is clearly ample time for his boyfriend to get into trouble because when Carlos turns back around, TK is no longer standing where he left him.

Instead, there’s a sizable hole in the ice.

Flashbacks - Filled

start again from the beginning | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK & Owen

Owen trusts his son. He’s watched TK fight his addiction and stay sober for the last six years, and he has faith that he can handle himself.

But when TK doesn’t show up for work the night after proposing to Alex, Owen knows that something is wrong. After all, they've been here before.

Branding - Filled

setting fire to our insides for fun | Supernatural | Meg x Cas

Cas had been prepared to find demons. Frankly, he would have been concerned if he didn’t find demons, given that that was his mission here. What he hadn’t been prepared for, however, was to find two demons torturing another, pressing the hot end of a branding iron into her forearm.

He killed the two torturers with practised ease, barely wasting a moment before they were both on the dirty, wooden floor, eyes burned out their sockets. Only then did he allow his surprise to catch up to him, breathing heavily as his gaze settled on someone he hadn’t seen in a long time.

Meg.

Memory Loss - Filled

focal point | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Waking up in the hospital is becoming all too familiar. Being the one in the bed is less so, but Carlos has had his fair share of hospital trips. He knows the drill.

As soon as he sees him awake, TK breaks out in harsh sobs. "Carlos," he breathes. "I... I thought I'd lost you."

Caught in an Explosion - Filled

can we skip past near death cliches? | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

It’s the kind of call every first responder dreads. A bomb threat in an apartment block, civilian’s lives on the line, the whole situation a hair’s breadth away from disaster. And Carlos is right in the middle of it.

tw: explosions, bombs

Forced to Kneel/Bow - Filled

in case you don’t live forever (let me tell you now) | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

His teammates were still sitting in the communal area when TK entered, eyes glued to the tv screen. Paul was the first to notice him, and TK’s concern only grew as he got everyone else’s attention, their worried gazes falling on him one by one.

“There’s a hostage situation at that big, fancy hotel across town," Marjan explained. "Apparently it’s pretty serious, they’ve had to send police in, and, um, well…”

Marjan paused, and TK felt dread wash through him, knowing what her next words would be.

“Carlos is there, TK. He’s gone in.”

tw: references to gun violence

Be Careful What You Wish For - Filled

can you beat back the night? | The Witcher | Geralt x Jaskier

He misses the bard. Geralt won’t admit it, not even to Roach, but he misses him. After months—years—of Jaskier’s constant chatter and the sound of his lute, the silence, once valued above all else, is too much.

It’s been months since the dragon, since Geralt lost both Yennefer and Jaskier in one fell swoop. He’s cursed himself many times over for the words he said—to both of them—and cursed himself more for the mistakes he made to get in this position in the first place.

*

this is the lot of witchers, to be alone.

Blood From the Mouth - Filled

I Got You | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, TK & 126 Crew

“I’m just sayin’,” Judd says, waving his arms around. “Somebody’s gonna get themselves killed in there one of these days. I had to come out here three times last year because of some idiots who think they know better than the ‘Keep Out’ signs.”

The team are called to an abandoned house where some kids are trapped. Everything is going smoothly, which, naturally, means that it won't be that way for much longer.

Trapped in a Burning Building - Filled

a little unsteady | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

9-1-1, What's your emergency?

'Please, help! My house is on fire and my husband’s inside!'

or

t.k. sometimes wonders if the universe is out to get him

Worked Themselves to Exhaustion - Filled

In Your Arms | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, Michelle & TK

T.K. and Carlos agreed when they started dating to check-in on each other that they were both okay. Reassurance that nothing bad had happened. So, when Carlos hasn't replied hours after his shift is supposed to have finished, T.K.'s definitely beginning to panic. 

Locked in a Cage - Filled

running out of time | Shadowhunter Chronicles | Kit x Ty

When (if) they got out of here, Kit wanted the record to unequivocally state that this wasn’t his fault. Not that it was Ty's either, but it certainly wasn't Kit's.

or

kit and ty's first hunt together after three years goes wrong and they wind up trapped in a cage with no way out. naturally, this leads to a heartfelt conversation.

Demonic/Ghostly Possession - Filled

Haunting | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, TK & Owen

T.K. is five when he first sees a ghost, though, of course, he doesn’t know that it’s a ghost. His name is Joey, and he lives in the playground, which T.K. thought was a little strange, but he doesn’t want to ask. Dad says it’s rude to ask questions like that to someone he’s just met.

Fingore - Filled

ease my mind | 911: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Briefly, Carlos considers calling TK and telling him about the accident. But… He only broke two of his fingers and it barely even classifies as a minor injury in his book, so there’s really no reason to bother his fiancé while he’s still on shift himself. He pockets his phone then looks around to figure out where the exit is.

Only, an all-too familiar laugh distracts him from his task, drawing his attention to the nurses station.

Where TK is standing, smiling as a nurse swats at him for stealing one of their lollipops.

Carlos is, beyond doubt, fucked.

Verbal Abuse - Filled

this is a song about somebody else | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, TK & Marjan

TK doesn't notice the 126's latest visitor until it's too late. He freezes as Alex smiles at him, knocked off balance by this sudden intrusion of his old life into his new one.

or

alex vists tk at the 126. luckily, tk has his family to help him through it.

tw: abusive language

Dying in Their Arms - Filled

can you hear me screaming (please don’t leave me) | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

As a cop, Carlos has to deal with all kinds of cases, and not all of them end well. But never in his life did he imagine that he'd have to respond to an incident involving his own boyfriend.

tw: major character death

Blindfolded - Filled

find you here inside the dark | Doctor Who | Thirteen x Yaz

Yaz has walked this room too many times to count now; she’s traced her fingertips over the walls, searching for any cracks or crevices to indicate where there might be a door.

If the Doctor were here, she’d have her sonic out by now, spitting out words, only half of which Yaz could understand. She’d find a way out in no time. Or, if not, at least she’d be here. Talking a mile a minute, probably annoying the hell out of their captors. Yaz can almost hear her now—

Wait.

She can hear her now.

Water Torture - Filled

soggy clothes and breezeblocks | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Carlos wakes up slowly. He cracks his eyes open, wincing at the pounding in his head. He lifts his hand to massage the pain away, only to discover that his hand won't move, the cool metal of handcuffs biting viciously into his wrist.

After an undercover mission goes wrong, Carlos is forced to fight for his life. And to make matters worse, his kidnappers are making sure that T.K. is watching the entire thing.

tw: torture

Fighting from the Inside - Filled

and curse the gods | BBC Atlantis | Jason & Medusa

Jason knows what it is to be cursed.

Slammed into a Wall - Filled

mind over matter (matter over mind) | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos, TK & Owen

After a night out goes wrong, TK and Carlos are left to deal with the consequences.

tw: homophobia, hate crimes, hiding an injury

Suicide Attempt - Filled

be done with this now | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Once upon a time, Carlos had thought that watching as his almost-boyfriend was whisked off in an ambulance, bullet wound in his chest, would be the worst moment of his life. Then TK had been kidnapped, and Carlos had spent hours not knowing where he was, if he was alive or dead, and he thought - this is it. Nothing can top this.

But, having to perform CPR on his husband, having to hold him as he slipped away in his arms?

That was worse than even his nightmares.

tw: suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, depression, drug abuse, overdosing

Bleeding Through the Bandages - Filled

pull you in to feel your heartbeat | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

The call comes at the tail end of Carlos’s shift, and he instantly hates whichever idiot decided to ruin his night by mugging someone.

What he's not expecting is to find his boyfriend on the ground, bleeding out from a stab wound.

Arm in a Sling - Filled

have you been involved in an accident at work? | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK & 126 Crew, TK x Carlos

T.K. was on his way to the hospital. Again.

At least this time he could say with absolute certainty that it 100% wasn't his fault.

Self-Harm - Filled

but god i wanna feel again | 9-1-1: Lone Star | TK x Carlos

Carlos blames himself for not noticing. It's not like he had much choice in the matter; he hasn't seen T.K. all week, and his texts have been going unanswered, but he can't help but feel like it's partly his fault.

If only T.K. would actually talk about himself, instead of keeping it all in.

tw: self-harm