#that remus never contacted harry????

[padfootastic]

i think—after writing saudade, my dislike for remus has become much more…clearer?

like, it’s definitely not the fact that he didn’t do anything to help sirius that bothers me. it’s pretty clear he had no power or resources to do anything about the fact, especially if even dumbledore didn’t do anything.

but the fact that he believed sirius to be at fault? or atleast, capable of betraying james? that he supposedly didn’t make any attempts to say, go see him in azkaban? that he acted exactly the same as everyone else in the WW who either didn’t know these two or only barely did? kinda terrible, tbh.

(and like, not to make it transactional or anything, but j&s did *so much* for remus; went above and beyond for him and…this is what he’s like in return? yikes)

[ellecdc]

The High Price of Family

chef!Sirius who has some explaining to do x mixologist!reader [1k words]

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7

CW: fluff, one reference to having 'been inside' reader

“Red, can you tell your husband to stop being a prat?” Sirius muttered as he stalked back into the kitchen where Lily was sitting at the kitchen island “helping” Sirius cook (which translated roughly to flipping through a magazine as Sirius did all of the work but being credited for having kept him company). 

“James! Stop being a prat!” She called out easily, not bothering to look up from the celebrity gossip she was reading.

“I’m not being a prat!” James called back.

“Then stop pretending to be mad at your best mate!” She conceded, and both she and Sirius shook their heads in fond exasperation as they heard James storming towards the kitchen.

He appeared in the doorway of the kitchen with his hair a mess (not unusual), his arms crossed (somewhat unusual - he did have very nice biceps that he liked to flaunt every now-and-again), and a dark scowl on his face (very unusual). 

“I am not pretending.” He hissed, his stormy gaze flitting between Lily and Sirius before Regulus and Remus entered the kitchen and each took a seat at the table. 

“Do you know what he has me saved as in his phone? Hm? His honorary brother and best friend with whom he has lived for much of his life? James. Fleamont. Potter.” James announced severely, emphasising each part of his name by hitting the side of his open right hand against the flattened palm of his left. “He government named me, Lils! Even Remus is at least only Remus J Lupin, but nooo, I get the full legal name.” 

“I think that’s perfectly acceptable.” Regulus offered primly. “It is your name, isn’t it?” 

Remus snorted a laugh before pressing a kiss to his boyfriend’s head. “You two are so weird.”

“It is weird!” James shrilled. 

“What do you have me saved as, Sirius?” Lily asked then; Sirius smirked.

“Lily Evans.”

A horrified sound came from the general direction of James as he stared at his best mate with a look of horror and betrayal, his arms falling uselessly to his sides. 

“But we’ve been married for fifteen years!” 

“And I’ve had Lily saved in my phone for seventeen.” Sirius responded simply. 

“This is absurd!”

“Why are you so bent out of shape about Sirius’ contact list?” Remus asked finally as Harry walked into the kitchen; hovering over Sirius as he dodged Sirius’ half-assed attempts at keeping him from stealing “tests” of his dinner. 

“Oh, dad’s miffed because he saw what Sirius has his new girlfriend saved as in his phone.” 

Remus let out a hum of understanding as Regulus let out a rather inelegant snort. “What’s the future Mrs. Black saved as?” He taunted, earning him a glare from his older brother.

“Y/N martini glass emoji.” James announced dramatically. 

Sirius continued cooking as Remus, Regulus, and Lily all stared at him in silence before Lily finally broke it with an “awe”.

“No! Not ‘awe’!” James shrilled.

“Oh come on, James. You’re only mad because Harry got to meet her first.” Remus placated, causing James to harrumph as he sat dejectedly beside his wife. 

“S’not fair.” He grumbled at the same time Regulus asked Harry what you were like. 

“Oh, she’s hot.” Harry offered quickly around a mouthful of stolen food, earning him an ‘oi!’ from his godfather. 

“Don’t objectify her like that!” He defended quickly, earning him a bemused look from his godson. 

“But…she is?” He asked.

Sirius blinked owlishly at Harry before turning back to his food. “Well, yes, but-”

“When do the rest of us get to meet her, then?” Regulus interrupted.

“Never.” Sirius muttered.

“And why not!?” James beseeched. 

“Because you’re horribly embarrassing and dramatic!” Sirius volleyed, turning towards his best friend and gesturing at him vaguely as if to say ‘see? Case in point’.

“Well that’s not fair.” Regulus pouted at the same time Remus let out a conceding ‘yeah, that’s fair’. 

“So what? You’re just going to meet the love of your life and never introduce her to your family?” Lily teased, causing Sirius to groan and let his shoulders fall. 

“That had sort of been the plan, yeah.” 

“Tough.” Regulus spat.

“You should host a party, Sirius; have us all over to meet her.” Remus offered.

“Fat chance.” 

“What about my birthday, then?” Regulus chimed in.

Sirius turned to look at his brother sceptically. “What about your birthday?” 

“Perhaps I host a party at our place.” 

“Perhaps you do…” Sirius continued.

“Perhaps you bring a plus one.” 

“Perhaps I don’t.”

“Perhaps,” Regulus continued, “that’s what I want for my birthday.” 

Remus nodded gravely at that. “That’s actually exactly what Regulus wants for his birthday, Sirius. He’d asked me for it first but it's not exactly something I can get for him.”

“Yeah, that’s what I want for Regulus’ birthday too.” James added quickly. 

“You don’t get anything for Regulus’ birthday.” Sirius sneered at him. 

“Yes, well,” Regulus started - clearly quite chuffed with what he considered a victory - as he stood to join Harry in stealing food directly from Sirius’ pan, “I do hope neither of you have plans next weekend, because I’m expecting both of you there.”

Sirius sighed and stepped away from the stove as he told the gremlins to ‘have at ‘er’ before grabbing his phone from the kitchen island and opening up your messages.

[777heavengirl]

Leave

poa!remus lupin x healer!reader one-shot ! warnings: angst ? mentions of war and death, eventual fluff word count: 4,014 masterlist

Remus Lupin was a handsome man. You had always known this, ever since fifth year when you got paired up with him in potions. It became your new favorite subject. He was not only gorgeous but bright and sharp as a whip. You could hear his sarcastic and witty comments from under his breath often, and the giggles that bubbled out of you were hard to contain. You had considered yourself decent friends, sharing more than one class with him and opting often to work together throughout your time at Hogwarts. He was even the reason you were a part of the order of the phoenix as the war broke out. 

It was a dark time, the insecurity and the panic. The sheer paranoia that draped over everyone like a coat made of lead. You lost contact as the war ended. His best friends were dead, or traitors. His family was dead and as far as you knew he retreated until the only mention of him was the pictures on your walls. You hadn’t laid eyes on the man for twelve years. 

But Remus Lupin was still a handsome man. Older barely, tired definitely. As Dumbledore introduced him as the new defense against the dark arts professor you couldn’t help but gawk. His shy smile was the same, a small curl of his lip as he looked sheepishly at the crowd of children. His light brown hair was longer than the last time you had seen him. He shaved it the year Harry was born, you always thought he looked quite good with the buzz. Matter of fact he had asked you to shave it for him. You’d never forget the trust he had in you at that moment, nor the feel of his head, his face in your hands. 

You had started your post as a secondary healer at Hogwarts around the same time Harry Potter turned 11. Albus insisted Madame Pomfrey needed the help, and as a trusted witch and now experienced and skilled healer after many years at St Mungo’s, you were the one for the job. After much bonding with the Potter boy, as he had the terrible habit of always needing medical care along with his friends you started to tell him, stories of his mother, of his father, and your time together at school. You suspected Albus Dumbledore was playing a game of chess. Remus’s appearance was no different. Maybe he was trying to introduce the boy to his parent’s old friends. Show him the love and care his parents had fostered with others. The way James and Lily cared for their friends like family, until their last seconds.

Lily Evans had been, until the day of her death, one of your closest friends. The two of you were basically inseparable, she always said muggle-borns needed to stick together. This closeness is what made your friendship with Remus so easy. It was like two overlapping circles of friends perfectly lining up, creating one. This also made it easy to fall in love with him. Lily always encouraged it, you could still hear the smile on her face as she spoke warmly about the man, how perfect he was for you.

Lily loved Remus. You suspected this was also the reason for his absence. Everyone deals with grief differently.

Or maybe he just really had no care for you after all?

You shook the thought away as you did your nightly duties. It was nearing the end of the first week of classes and you hadn’t dared talk to Remus. You were trying to come to terms with the undeniable fact that maybe it was best that you didn’t reconnect. He could teach from his classroom on his side of the castle and you could heal children from yours. Not in a bad way, but maybe in the way two people avoid each other because of too much shared pain. Because maybe looking at each other meant acknowledging how alone you were. It’s not like he had even looked at you either. You wondered if he thought of you. 

You thought of Lily as you cleaned. She’d huff at you if she heard your thoughts. 

“Ah yes Ms Y/L/N,” Dumbledore walked in, Remus in tow. The soft brown, wool sweater he wore made your heart clench. He looked like he always did, he looked like the Remus you grew up with. Not the stuffier professor robes you had seen him wearing around. “I do believe you are familiar with Professor Lupin’s-”

”predicament” Remus muttered but in the silence of the night it was clear as day. 

”ah yes, ever so verbose, the professor, but you are aware yes?” 

Of course, you knew, you had helped him post-full moon before while you were training to be a healer. While the war felt like it would blow down your doors at any minute. you simply nodded. You resumed your task of folding the sheets, opting to do it with your hands.

You were afraid to look at him, but you knew what Dumbledore would ask.

”I trust you can make sure he’s in good shape each month then?”

You smiled softly at the headmaster, “of course sir, i’ll tend to him when needed” Dumbledore smiled and nodded as he turned, patting Remus’s shoulder as he passed and disappeared into the castle's darkness.

You could feel Remus tense up as you were left alone, you felt suffocated even in the expansiveness of the hospital wing. 

“I have all the moon dates in my calendar professor,” the words felt foreign coming from your mouth but you couldn’t bring yourself to say his name. “so please don’t hesitate to tell me what arrangement you’d prefer I can go up to your room the morning after or if you feel like coming down as well”

Remus shifted on his feet as you spoke. He stared hard at the windows but he suspected you were also avoiding his gaze. 

“I think I can make it up here, don’t worry I’ll probably be okay,” You hummed, shooting him a tightlipped smile as he bowed his head and left. Your eyes never met. 

Remus felt like he might suffocate at any moment. His skin felt hot under his collar and he couldn’t remember if he had looked at you at all. He tried to picture your face. Had it aged at all? Had you changed? He could only think back to when you buzzed his head thirteen years ago. Your wide smile as the two of you laughed at his falling locks. It had been cathartic at the time, and he could still feel the ghost of your fingers over his face, over his head.

It was a fleeting thought, a flash of a life he had forgotten he had lived. Twelve years is an awfully long time, to not see someone.

He wondered how you had dealt with all of it. With the losses, with the absence of everyone you loved. He could feel regret worm its way into his heart. He had left you alone. You were each other's remaining friends. There was no longer anyone else, Lily and James, Marlene, and Dorcas were all dead. He presumed Mary was dead as well. Frank and Alice weren’t there anymore, not mentally.

He knew you took care of them. At St Mungo’s. He caught a glimpse of you once as you came into their room. Remus had just gone to visit, talk to them, and bring them flowers. Even if they didn’t seem to recognize him, Alice was entranced by the Lillies he brought. He felt content enough about it as he walked away, but then you walked into the room after. He knew you hadn't seen him, but he peeked in to observe you. With your nice smile and your caring gaze, you checked up on them, made sure they had been fed, ran through a small (although futile) therapeutic exercise with them, and put on a charm so the flowers wouldn’t wilt, so they make you happy for a long time Alice. Remus hated the pang of pain in his heart. He always knew you would become a good healer. He didn’t want to disrupt your life. You seemed well-adjusted. Or at least he hoped you were, but that was just the outside, and the outside doesn’t always reflect the inside.

Remus knew this especially well.  

-

This arrangement between you was barely touched on. Remus had come in only once in the two months that had passed for a small scrape on his neck. It made your fingers itch in anticipation. It was like you needed to feel needed. You knew he wasn't having the best time. He looked pale and ill and you fought the urge to drop something off at his door. 

"Severus I need to know if you're giving him Wolfsbane" You disliked dealing with Severus Snape. You didn't trust him. Not since the incident with Lily in fifth year. And rightfully so. Regardless of the headmaster's unwavering faith in him, you were convinced he was going to screw with Remus and his job. Whether payback for things in the past or simple jealousy. 

"I don't see how that's any of your business," He sneered at you as he turned away, walking down the dark empty halls of the dungeon's hallways. 

"I'm his nurse-"

"He won't even let you treat him, and if you knew what was good for you," he crossed his arms. You felt as useless as when he and Lily had started arguing in fourth year. "You'd forget about him, its pathetic-" 

You knew it was pointless to speak to the man. You often pondered if he saw glimpses of Lily in you just as you saw them in him.

You huffed as the two of you walked your separate ways. You felt sixteen again. Mindlessly, you walked to the defense against the dark arts tower. It wasn't a section of the castle you found yourself in often or at all anymore, your days as a student had long passed. You focused on the stone stairs. You felt like your hands were clammy and freezing at the same time. You didn't know if you were overstepping a boundary. 

Classes had finished for the day, the kids ran around the castle, some greeting you some not. You didn't mind. You knocked softly at his office door with your knuckles. You suddenly felt insecure about your red robes and white apron, it was nearly identical to Poppy Pomfrey's. She said something about yours having a younger silhouette. Whatever the hell that meant. 

"Come in," Remus's voice called out through the door. You turned the door knob hesitantly. You couldn't help but stare at the artifacts and books thrown and placed about. "Ah, welcome"

"I'm sorry for the intrusion," you still didn't dare say his name, it was stuck in your throat like a bubble of water and air that forms when you drink too fast. You felt like you might choke. "I just needed to know if you were taking a certain potion-"

Remus nodded, an understanding smile playing on his lips. 

"I am,"

"Okay good," you trailed off as you finally looked at him straight on. His hands had stopped their task, ink-dipped feather placed back on his desk as he also stared at you. You fiddled with your fingers behind your back. "I'm sorry, Severus wouldn't answer my question and I needed to know so as to not give you anything that might react poorly-"

"It's alright," Remus bit his lip slightly, you could tell he was bouncing his leg from under his desk.

"I'll take my leave then" you turned away from him. 

"Y/N" you stopped at the door, the cold metal handle cooling your hand. "D'you want some tea?"

You couldn't say no. Not to him. So you turned back and nodded. 

Remus smiled softly, seemingly relieved. 

-

Your tea time with Remus had been filled with content silence. Neither of you felt the urge to speak, it was a comfortable stillness as you sat side by side looking out his window. You didn't feel the need to express anything or address the twelve years that you were absent from each other's lives.

This felt enough for now. 

As the sun set you left, with a thank you and a small smile. He mirrored it. You felt like a bit of weight had been lifted and you spent the rest of the night with a small smile on your face. 

The next few weeks went along about the same, healer duties with the bonus of Remus passing by the hospital wing later on and having tea silently or you seeking him out in his office. You were afraid to talk, like you'd ruin it if you did. You felt as if your desperation to erase the last twelve years of silence and solitude might consume you.

But the full moon came around again and you desperately hoped Remus would come in the morning. For you to fuss over him, to make sure he was properly fed, to give him whatever sweets he wanted. You wanted to kiss the scars on his face as you once did, to run your fingers through his hair as you reassured him that it was over, that he was okay. Even if he kept his consciousness thanks to the potion, transformations were rough on him. You hadn't been able to even close your eyes.

You heard a knock on your door. You briefly glanced at the clock on your desk, 5:30 AM. Remus was out of it. And probably outside your door. You scrambled from your bed, closing the distance between you and the door, and cracked it open. Sure enough, the brown-haired man stood there, with his greenish-pale face and clammy skin.

"I'm sorry-"

"Remus please-" You dragged him inside, quickly directing him towards your bed. You made sure he laid down while you assessed him for any accidental injuries. As you got to work Remus watched you, the way you muttered to yourself as you read the labels to potions and serums to try and help him. Your dark blue silk gown flowed down your body, reaching right over your knee. It reminded him of a river at night. The lighter blue robe loosely tied around you pooled around ur feet as u crouched next to your medicine box. 

“Here drink this, it should make you feel better,” you say next to him, one leg tucked under your thigh, the other hanging from the side of the bed. You brought the small vial up to his lips, one hand under his head to try to bring him up. The green liquid tasted slightly bitter but he drank the whole vial without reproach.��

Remus sighed as he felt his body warm. You got up again, opening and closing cabinets, muttering to yourself again. You found a chocolate bar and a cloth with a sigh and walked briskly back to his side. Remus felt sadness bubble up from deep within. He thought of you all alone for so many years, he watched your face as you dabbed a warm damp cloth around his face. He hadn’t noticed before, how you didn’t look all that older. Tired, yes, beautiful, always. Last time he had seen you, the two of you were freshly 21 and you felt like you would eat the world raw. Now you were 33. Most people your age haven’t seen half of what you had. You had a frown on your face, and your eyes reflected a deep sorrow. 

You were so young. Remus thought of your time apart. He couldn't rationalize that he had lived so long without you.

You were both still so young.

”I’m sorry,” Remus couldn’t help saying it

”You don’t have to apologize for anything Rem,” your voice was barely above a whisper, you conjured some water in the glass on your bedside table. You went to help him drink from it and he grabbed it from your hand, sitting up.

“I do though,” his eyebrows stitched together in worry, he placed the cup back in its original spot. He couldn’t help but look away “I left-“

Your hands dropped onto your lap, you felt like your heart was falling out of your chest.

”You didn’t owe me anything, we just drifted-“

”Love you know that’s not true,” your head spun at the nickname, you hadn’t heard it come out of his mouth in so long. Old habits die hard. “I left you alone and we’re all the other has left.”

He shook his head and felt his eyes fill with tears. You could feel the tears start falling from yours as well.

”It’s my fault I should’ve tried harder-“ Remus laughed in indignation.

”Y/N it is not your fault,” as you tried to talk, to somehow convince him and yourself that your distance had been your doing, that you had been the one to cut him off, the one to leave, he grabbed your hand. “I was the one that stopped answering calls and the door, I moved away, I’m the one that did everything in my power to not think about what had happened and that included leaving you-"

Remus couldn't help but think the worst of himself, as he saw the tears stain your cheeks and your nose redden. You were full-on crying now, clutching his hand like he would vanish into thin air. Remus Lupin was someone who left. He knew this, he always had been, as a kid he ran from his problems. From his lycanthropy, from his mother's illness in his teenage years, from his father's sadness. He ran then, spending holidays at Hogwarts where he could pretend that the only thing that plagued him was the full moon, moving in with Sirius and Peter right after graduation. Being the first one out of the door after they had to go their separate ways for safety.

He was still a man that left. He left you as the both of you stood alone in the ruins of the family you had all built. He ran as far as he could. 

Remus Lupin was someone who left. And he feared that the look on your face now would forever make his heart bleed. Because how could he have let himself leave you?

But you didn't see that, and if you did you didn't hold it against him. Your tear-ridden eyes shone when you looked at him. He felt like he might suffocate under your gaze. He wanted nothing more than to kiss you, for all the years he didn't, for all the times he almost did. Remus Lupin wanted to kiss you more than anything else in the world. 

That could wait, he had already waited a lifetime anyway.

He pulled your arm until your body collided with his chest, heart to heart. His hand pressed your head close to him, your hands gripping his soft sweater until your knuckles turned white. He buried his face in your hair as you both cried, sobs trembling through both your chests. Your knees on the bed as your top half lay on top of him. You didn't care, the only thing you could think about was how he was here now, how he held you, and the way his hand rubbed up and down your back. 

"Please never leave Remus," the words managed to escape you between sobs, and he could hardly manage to croak out a never again.

And he never would. Remus vowed to himself, at this moment with you in his arms, he'd never let go again.

He'd never leave.

-

It had become a habit for the two of you, to seek each other's comfort. You'd wonder what it felt like to kiss him. Although you were close now, there seemed to be a line neither of you would cross. Wary of the other's reaction. You figured that maybe after so many years any romantic interest in you had dissipated. 

So the habit persisted, he'd come beaten and battered after a full moon, Severus's potion-making is quite unreliable, isn't it? You figured he did it on purpose. And you'd patch the brown-haired man, only then would he pull you into his arms. Remus was soft and pliable, the exhaustion of the transformation made him melt into your body and your bed. He more often than not dragged himself to your room, even when the full moon was far, even when he felt good. He would make his way to your room, and you'd always greet him with your arms wide open and ready to press your bodies together until you fell asleep. He'd usually be gone by morning.

It was December now,  and the cold made his joints feel brittle and ache. 

He had gone directly to your room after dinner, he couldn't help but watch you as you got ready for bed. He stripped down from his robes until he was only in a loose white tee and a pair of joggers he had permanently left in your room. The aches that resonated through him often made you forget that Remus Lupin was still a young man. You were only 33. The remainders of youth highlighted the shape of his body as he threw himself on your bed. The white tee shifted upwards with his arms revealing slivers of his torso. You couldn't help but look through your mirror as you brushed your hair. 

Your dynamic had become somewhat domestic, he'd watch you get ready and pull you into his arms to sleep together. You felt like a silly teenager, playing house. Like this was the life you were supposed to live, the soft music pouring from the record player, a soft song you heard many years ago. The type of song that makes nostalgia and melancholy settle in your heart. This was it, the life you were supposed to live was the way Remus crossed the room and pulled you by the hand. The way his arm pulled you close and you slow danced, laughing at the way you tumbled around. You deserved a soft life, one with chocolate frogs and slow rhythms. A life with laughter and joy, of feeling unjudged, of feeling safe and warm. 

A life full of love.

And as Remus spun you around and laughter poured from both your lips you couldn't help but feel your heart swell. It felt like a warm flower bloomed in your chest as you looked at his smiling face. He slowed your spinning around the room as the song came to a close but you remained in his arms, you could feel the tip of his fingers tug slightly at a lock of your hair. You couldn't help but smile up at him between giggles. 

"Can I kiss you?" his words were merely a whisper, like a ghost of desire. And you couldn't help but smile even wider, pulling his neck down to press your lips against his soft ones. He tasted of spearmint and chocolate, and you couldn't help but break into a smile, lips still pressed onto his. He leaned back, holding your face between his large hands. Laughter bubbled from his lips as he leaned in for a second kiss, head spinning, his lips soft but firm. He dragged his lips to your cheeks, pressing pecks on the apples of your cheeks, on your jaw, on your neck. Laughter bounced between the two of you.

Fifteen years of desire piled up to one kiss. 

This life was the one you deserved. 

[moonpascaltoo]

poly!marauders

MASTERLIST • THE MARAUDERS • 11/22/24

˚‧⁺ ･ ˖ · ୨ৎ recs

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you go costume shopping with your boys

𑣲 mini me I @calliopesdiary

your little sister captures the hearts of your boyfriends, you may even say she has a little crush on james.

𑣲 runaway pets I @soapyblubbles

𑣲 self-sabotage I @marauroon

the marauders had thrown their hearts at you like it was effortless. and you just couldn’t return the gesture

𑣲 taste I @pretty-little-mind33

You introduce yourself to the bookstore next door

𑣲 flowers I @iamgonnagetyouback

When you bring your boyfriends flowers out of the blue, they panic.

[maxdibert]

hi! i saw in one of your posts you wrote about how Sirius Black had no reason to bully Snape and i thought about it…..i mean doesn't his hatred seem too personal? we have Lupin who has no contact with Snape after book 3 but Sirius goes crazy when Snape is around and they are alone so he can attack him (kitchen scene in book 5). and he knows so much about him: who he hung out with at school, his relationship with Lucius; at the same time he doesn't know about the mark, about how Severus was the one who brought the prophecy to voldemort that led to Lily and James death. and yes he is stuck at age 21 but even then they graduated school and as he says they never heard of Snape in those years. It seems a bit odd: don't bullies usually try to downplay their role in what they did to the victim, or even try to make it look like nothing happened? And he and Remus try to do that with Harry, but at the same time he seems incredibly proud and pleased with himself when he talks about the prank. One moment confused me when I was reading book 3: when Sirius has Peter at gunpoint with his wand, he is extremely focused on him. He doesn't take his eyes off him, because it was for this moment, the act of revenge, that he escaped from prison. As far as I remember, Harry describes it as "nothing could distract him at that moment" or something like that. But as soon as Remus even mentions Snape, Sirius' attention suddenly switches: he turns away from Peter and asks about him again. Or when he watches Snape during the OWL exams??? Especially when Rowling describes his reaction after the exam, when he sees him under the tree, as the reaction of a dog to a rabbit. He seems so obsessed and like something happened between them that really got to him. Or he's just as intolerant of half-bloods as his family. I completely agree with you that Sirius bullied Snape simply because James did it and he found it funny. But his hatred seems excessive, he has no reason to hate Snape so much. James has his excuse about Lily, but Sirius has none of that. But he still tries to kill him and it doesn't really matter hides, lol. I've read an opinion that he hates him because of his unrequited feelings for James, where Severus is the reason James even noticed Lily, which I don't really agree with, to be honest. Sorry, it got too long, ahaha. What I want to ask is: do you have any thoughts on this?

Well, the explanation for his relationships at school is quite simple because Sirius doesn’t leave home until he’s 16. Considering that his brother goes to Slytherin and that Narcissa is his cousin, it’s not strange to deduce that Snape’s name, along with other Slytherin students, probably came up at some family dinner/lunch/meeting. Like, talking about who in Regulus and Sirius’ year might have ‘potential,’ for example. It seems coherent to me that, considering Sirius’ environment until he leaves to live with the Potters, he’d be aware of certain things.

Leaving that aside, let’s talk about Sirius Black, because I think in recent years the Marauders fandom has ruined this character, and he’s actually a character with a lot of depth. Or at least more than many others in the saga.

(This is gonna ne so fucking long lol)

Sirius is a posh kid. He’s a posh kid who is embarrassed about being posh and feels guilty about it. He’s the typical rich kid from a conservative family who’s had issues with his mom (in this case) and his way of getting back at everything he felt was missing from his childhood is to vehemently oppose everything he thinks she represents. And the funniest part is that (as is often the case) his problem with his mom is that they both have a terrible character, which is why they clash. Because Sirius has the kind of terrible character that is incompatible with anyone else who has the same terrible character. But despite everything, he’s still a posh kid. Because he comes from an aristocratic family and was raised with those values of superiority. Because he’s never had to fend for himself (he leaves home but goes to another rich family, the Potters, and on top of that, his uncle Alphard leaves him his entire inheritance, so he has plenty of money) and he has always enjoyed the privilege of his surname, his blood status, and the fact that he’s (according to Rowling) super handsome. In other words, Sirius belongs to the ruling class and behaves with the same arrogance, entitlement, and lack of empathy that is typical of that class. No matter how much he tries to deny it and distance himself from it, he can only do so on a superficial level (Muggle posters, being a Gryffindor, enchanting a Muggle motorcycle) because when it comes down to it, he has no idea how to deconstruct himself, nor is he interested in giving up or losing his privileges, because he’s quite comfortable with them. He’s like the typical aristocratic kid from an Opus Dei family who thinks he’s better than everyone around him because he votes for the left and has been to four protests, but at the end of the day, he still lives a bourgeois life and doesn’t understand the root of social problems.

That said, let’s move on to James.

I think James was everything Sirius wanted to be. No, not be, I think James had everything Sirius wanted to have: loving parents, a family that wasn’t involved in a cult, a pleasant environment that allowed him to do whatever he wanted instead of being constrained by traditions and social norms, liberal and progressive ideals… James had the life Sirius had always wanted, but with one key detail: he was also rich and from an old, prestigious family. This is super important because when Sirius chooses his rebellion partner, he doesn’t pick some random Muggle-born, or a half-blood, or someone from the middle or lower class. Sirius chooses as his best friend someone who embodies everything he wants to be/have, but who at the same time belongs to his same social stratum, both economically and in blood status. Sirius chooses a future Gryffindor rebel with very different ideas from his family, but ironically he chooses like anyone from his family would: someone with money, status, and power. And I find this super amusing because it’s so coherent with his character. I mean, if Sirius were a real person, he would’ve done the same thing because guys like him are like that: the kings of cognitive dissonance and double standards.

Sirius always wanted James’ validation, or at least that’s how I see it. I think for him, feeling that James approved of what he did was a way to legitimize himself as someone different from his family. James represented the “progressive” social elite that Sirius aspired to by rejecting the traditional values imposed on him. So, unconsciously, he understood that if he did everything James wanted, and I’ll go further, everything he thought James would like, then he would distance himself from that Black image and gain validation as something entirely opposite. The problem is that Sirius, unlike James, was raised in an environment where ethical and moral values were very different, and where it was clearly established that certain people were “the other,” an “other” sociologically understood as the idea that some humans are inherently less than others. And although Sirius consciously rejected this idea, unconsciously he had been raised with it. Therefore, consciously, he didn’t reject people based on their blood status because he could identify that as something his family would do, and family = bad. But unconsciously, he was conditioned to see other people as non-people, and this is where Severus comes into play.

James dislikes Severus because he sees him as an obstacle/threat/nuisance in his crush on Lily. By default, and because of that constant need for validation from James, Sirius also focuses on him as a hostile element. And if he’s hostile to James, who in a way is his moral compass, then that guy must be trash because, of course, it’s obvious. But not only that, this guy is also a half-blood and poor, so poor he wears old clothes. And on top of that, he’s ugly. And not very masculine. So he has all the elements for Sirius, the aristocrat raised in luxury under the premise that he’s better than others because of his origins, to see him as “the other” and exercise all his power and privilege to oppress him without remorse, because for him, it’s justified. Justified unconsciously by the education he received, and consciously because if James hates him, there must be a good reason to hate him, so everything is justified. If we add to that the fact that Severus desires everything Sirius has always tried to reject: more social status, more recognition, power, belonging to Slytherin, rubbing shoulders with important wizards, forgetting the Muggle world he grew up in… well, we have a molotov cocktail for him to make Severus’ life unbearable. And Severus is an easy target for someone like school-age Sirius Black: he has no friends, no surname, no parents to protect him, and no stable socio-economic situation. Sirius can project all his frustrations onto him without any consequences. He can completely dehumanize him and stop seeing him as a person. He can behave like a Black.

I think the Prank is a good example to see the difference in upbringing between Sirius and James. Both are bullies, both are abusers, both have zero remorse when it comes to using their status and power to make life impossible for those they believe deserve it. But James was raised in an environment where he knows that actions have consequences, that you can’t cross “certain lines,” such as murder, for example. Sirius was taught the opposite—he was raised to think that the life of “the other” holds no value, and that is something that in his story with Severus goes too far. James understands that death is something serious and can bring terrible consequences, while Sirius does not. For the Black family, death is nothing if there is a reason for the person to die, and Sirius has his own reasons for playing with Severus’ life the way Bellatrix would play with the life of any Muggle-born.

(This is something I really like as well—the way Sirius and Bellatrix are fundamentally alike, and how little that’s discussed. But I’ll leave that for another time, otherwise I won’t finish.)

I don’t think it’s a matter of Sirius being obsessed with Snape, but rather that, for all the reasons I’ve explained, he uses Severus as a catalyst for his repressed anger and that sadism he inherited from his family. He can’t channel it toward anyone else because that would lead to absolute rejection from James. Since James hates and despises Severus, he’s never going to question Sirius for channeling all his pent-up rage on him, so it’s a free pass. If he had reached that level of sadism with someone who didn’t provoke the same level of animosity in James as Severus did, he would have risked confronting his biggest fear: that James would see him as a Black, not as Sirius. Losing his validation as the black sheep to become just another one of them. So he focuses on Severus because it’s a safe bet.

Moving on to their relationship during the book canon…

We don’t really see a proper confrontation until the fifth book. I mean, in the third, it shows that Sirius still sees Severus as “other” by dragging him along while unconsciously banging his head. In the fourth, there’s that scene where Dumbledore forces them to shake hands, and it’s clear they still hate each other. But it’s not until the fifth book that we get a real confrontation, where Sirius loses his temper. I think this has a lot to do with (drumroll) once again that cognitive dissonance between what Sirius always wanted to be and what he actually is, especially given the role he plays on the chessboard at that point in the story.

Sirius did everything he could to distance himself from his family, and the climax of that was joining the Order of the Phoenix and actively fighting against that same family, several members of whom were “soldiers” for the opposite side. Sirius is finally achieving what he wants—to be a hero. To stop being part of the elite dark villains and instead be part of the heroic elite. The noble of high birth who fights valiantly for the good of the realm, just as James was destined to be. It’s the climax, the absolute fulfillment of his adolescent desire. But then he’s thrown into Azkaban, and when he gets out, he finds that the poor, weird kid addicted to dark arts, who sucked up to future dark wizards, who hung out with purists and even joined the “bad side”—the side of Sirius’ family, the villains—is now the most important member of the Order. He’s none other than Dumbledore’s right hand. He’s a double agent risking his neck every day and has more responsibility than anyone else. That kid Sirius called Snivellus for being a crybaby has more guts and more endurance than most people. The one who always wanted to be part of the elite Sirius hated is now the one playing them all, making them look like idiots. The one who looked frail and effeminate turns out to be more “manly.” And that hurts. That hurts a lot. You go to prison, and when you get out, the person you didn’t even consider a person not only ranks above you, but is playing in a league you can’t aspire to. And the best part is, Sirius can’t fully accept it because he’s still Sirius—a classist, privileged aristocrat incapable of accepting that (as is only logical) the poor working-class kid turned out to be far more useful than him in both politics and war.

To me, it’s poetic justice.

[leeny-leens]

Remus Lupin and R fic where after Lily and James die, R manages to take Harry with her into the muggle world and basically dips because she’s appalled at the fact that no one cared enough about the newborn child to protect him and she cuts all contact with Remus but not really I had an idea for this (I can elaborate on their dynamic) and anyways it’s basically her raising Harry and (reluctantly) sending him off to Hogwarts where he comes back over the breaks and tells his mum about the absolute batshit insane stuff that happens and she’s LIVID at Dumbledores inability to keep her son safe and she decides to teach him stuff over the summer break. Cue Year 3 where Sirius breaks out of Azkaban and Remus is professor. He immediately recognizes Harry, keeps an eye on him and he is stunned by the fact that Harry can defend himself from the Dementors, and upon inquiry Harry only shrugs and says his mum prepared him. Remus hors into overdrive because who the fuck is his mum??? In his grief and madness he thought R died or something because she was unfindable, gone from the face of earth and everyone assumed she died in the aftermath of the war. STH STH feelings, Remus and R meeting again and it's filled with tension and all the things they never said and all the feelings and she's mad at him when he tries to do things for harry because how dare he after he left AND ANYWAYS ITS ANGSTY ITS TRAGIC IT HURTS BUT????

[ginevrapng]

character guide

reoccurring characters i frequently write about or plan to

(i love getting requests and asks about these characters!)

— best friend!james

"can he really stay in denial and pretend he's not in love with you if lily knows, what if she's told the others. what if she's told you?" best friend james is kind of toxic. he's jealous and possessive. he tried to ignore his feelings and instead focused it all on lily evans, who they later dated and broke up with. you and james have been best friends for years, you've known each other since first year. you call him 'jamie' and no one else does. you have a playful relationship, it's also affectionate with hugging and physical contact in general. you get cold a lot and end up stealing his blankets and covers from his bed, james has no complaints because when he eventually gets them back they smell like you. you have no idea of james' feelings towards you. you fancied james at one point before deeming that you had no chance with him and you couldn't ruin your friendship you had together.

— bestfriends!dads marauders / bfd!marauders

"you're not dating my harry are you sweetheart?" "what! of course i'm not! we're just friends." you say probably louder than you should, wanting to defend yourself. your best friend is harry potter and the marauders have taken an interest in you. they've noticed your lingering looks and they're waiting on making a move. you spend a lot of time around harry, so you also spend a lot of time around them, every time they want to make you theirs more but they're being patient. they've fooled around together in the past, remus and sirius more often than the others. they'd have one night stands with random girls together. they don't want to treat you as a one night stand. harry and you are in your early 20s, the marauders being around 43. magic is never mentioned.

— boyfriend!neville

neville places a delicate kiss on your temple and speaks lowly into your ear, "love you flower." you two have been in a relationship for quite some time now. he tells you he loves you and you tell him you love him too. you're an intimate couple, always seen holding hands and cuddling. in private you are the same, you find it hard to keep your hands of each other, and mainly it's you that would be described as a more needy person, always wanting to kiss him and fuck him while neville tries his best to put his foot down, you're rather persistent though. boyfriend!neville is a soft dom and worships the ground you walk on. he has a slight geordie accent and loves pet names, calling you 'flower' and 'petal' a lot.

— friends with benefits james / fwb!james

he has to tell you. he has to tell you. i love you. i love you. i love you. your relationship is that you have no relationship. you're not really friends but make out all the time. you've never spoke to each other about what you are or your feelings but overtime you've both fallen in love with each other but the other one doesn't know, and the whole school doesn't even know that you know each other. if james mentioned your name to his friends he'd get confused looks and they wouldn't even know who you are. you're not a gryffindor and you're very different to james, quiet and well behaved. you don't stand out from the crowd and you don't wish to, you don't have many friends either, preferring spending time alone. james goes out of his way to learn your time table so he knows where you'll be and when, wanting to know when he can steal you away from your next class so he can see you. you both wish you could spend more time together but never mention it to each other. james calls you 'love' but you're oblivious to how genuine it is and how he never calls anyone else it.

[morsmordream]

my random HP family headcanons that i firmly stand by

(not canon compliant)

creature blood was remarkably common in the older family lines that existed before modern-day laws. it is rather rare that these families produce true creatures themselves, even half-blooded creatures, but the blood can often manifest into family gifts. for example, creature blood is how the slytherin line have their ability to speak parseltongue.

the black family are world-renowned in various fields. they’ve produced countless scholars, and some of the finest duellists of each generation. but the family specialty, that everyone learns, is curse-breaking and it’s inverse. there’s a terrible item in the family vault that could kill you if you touch it? contact the blacks. you need an object enchanted to persuade someone into supporting a wizengamot bill? contact the blacks. expensive as their services may be, it’s always worth the money. customer satisfaction guaranteed.

the black family have held their reputation for dabbling in the darkest of arts, even black magic, since their very beginning. their family name comes from their reputation of practicing black magic. this is separate from dark magic, and is a dead art today. whilst books exist in the darkest corners of very few family’s vaults and libraries, the sacrifices required have deterred anyone who picked them up for centuries. a branch of black magic involves the summoning of beings from beyond our world, ‘demons’ as they are often referred to. the summoning of a shape-shifting demon, and subsequent procreation with, is a potential reason why only the black family have metamorphmagi in britain today- though this claim is unproven, and no longer proudly claimed by the family itself.

the malfoys have veela blood, especially these days. it was a rather scandalous affair when abraxas malfoy married a french witch, amelie bonnacord, who had been adopted into a notable pureblood family and happened to be a veela. the malfoys already had distant veela ancestry, making abraxas resistant to the veela allure. their children, lucius and lydia malfoy, were therefore half veela, and her grandchildren, including draco malfoy, a quarter veela. the veela allure seemed to work differently with men, and little was known about it as men born to those with veela blood was rare. the malfoys spend most holiday seasons in france, visiting family, and all speak fluent french.

the potter family never have been, and never should be seen as, a sparkling beacon for light magic. as necromancers by blood, no matter how much time passes since their amalgamation with the peverells, they naturally lean towards darker magic to facilitate practicing the art. not every potter has dabbled in their family gift, it’s not a requirement, but the ancient books in the family vault cannot be destroyed and will always return to the vault after a necromancer passes.

a few centuries into the past, the potter family migrated to india before a couple of branches returned to britain in the early 20th century. fleamont potter and his cousin, charlus potter, were the first potters to be born on british soil for centuries. fleamont potter married euphemia patil, a half-indian british witch, and had james potter. james potter, upon marrying lily evans, had harry potter- who was half indian.

the lupin family have a long history of naturally born werewolves, hence their family name. as time went on, and laws changed, werewolves born into the family would assimilate into packs instead of living as wizards with a dark secret. with time, fewer and fewer werewolves were born into the family, and the werewolf blood appeared dormant. remus lupin became a werewolf through an attack from fenrir greyback- the first werewolf in the family in several generations. his condition did not pass onto his son, but it is possible that remus being a werewolf may awaken the possibility of future werewolves in the lupin line in generations to come.

the weasleys hail from an old irish clan, one which they no longer practice the traditions and magic of- deeming them outdated in an age where they are deemed ‘blood traitors’ for their love and acceptance of muggleborns. the family magic is largely based around the elements, and is only really practiced by bill and charlie- though fred and george dabble in it from time to time. due to turning their backs on tradition, the weasley manor wards refused to grant entry to those in the family who did not practice their family magics- which is why they live in the burrow instead.

the weasleys fall from grace is infamous in pureblood circles. before the first war, they were actually a rather wealthy family. arthur weasley’s auror wage was enough to live off with two less children, and their vault was plentiful. molly added to their income by authoring books on household charms and tutoring pureblood daughters in etiquette. unfortunately, molly encouraged arthur to funnel money into the order of the phoenix to help with the war- they were not active participants, rather financial backers. by the war’s end, the family vault had been halved, they had two more children, and molly had quit authoring books to raise the children. she soon quit tutoring too, turning her back on other pureblood families due to her paranoia that anyone who hadn’t aided the order in the war were all dark and thus contributed somehow to her brothers deaths. soon after, arthur left the aurors and moved to head the misuse of muggle artifices office at molly’s insistence, due to her persistent paranoia- this time that something horrible would befall him as an auror. this caused another significant drop in the family’s finances, gaining them their reputation of being a poor family with more children than they can clothe.

the nott family are descended from viking clansmen in norway, and the majority of the family are still based there today. they’re very proud of this heritage, and every child born into the family is trained extensively in hand to hand combat from a young age. the nott family additional pre-schooling education also includes the language of old norse, nordic history, ancient runes, and runic magic. the england-based branch of the family add norwegian on to this as well.

the gaunt line, and subsequently the slytherin line, are only extinct in britain (the cursed child is not canon to me idc about delphini). a branch of the family, descended from one ominis gaunt, live on in france and have long abandoned their practices of inbreeding. the branch or branches of the family that remained on british soil rapidly squandered all that remained in their vaults by the turn of the 20th century, leading the family to financial and societal ruin with only their heritage and a few heirlooms remaining intact.

the lovegood family are rather notable as one of the few remaining seer lines in britain. pandora lovegood, upon marrying xenophilius ollivander, found her own seer ability passed down to her daughter luna. many overlook their seer lineage and focus more on the family’s eccentricity, forgetting that true seers rarely speak in plain language- they cannot always just speak the truth of what their visions show them, they must relay what they have seen in a way that makes others search for the answer. it’s not that hard to understand when you actually try it.

[sliebman10]

Settled

( @wolfstarmicrofic , prompt: Forbidden Forest, word count: 297)

Sirius at 11 was wide-eyed and energetic, enjoying his newfound friends and freedom within the Hogwarts castle.

Sirius at 16 was defiant and fed up with his family’s increasingly desperate attempts to control him. He cut the ties and could finally breathe.

22 found Sirius at the darkest point in his life. The war was over, yes. But it had cost him everything, including his freedom.

It wasn’t until he turned 34 that he regained his freedom and sense of purpose.

Now, the years gathered around him like a blanket, more warm than cold. More love than conflict. At first, he didn’t know what to do with the love he had. But he accepted it from Remus, and from Harry, and they made their own family.

They celebrated weddings and birthdays and anniversaries.

And at 65, he felt settled. He never thought he’d want to be settled when he was younger. What excitement was there in that? He’d wanted the excitement of running in the Forbidden Forest, of missions, of riding his motorbike, of exploring endless possibilities.

But settled also meant this, sitting on the veranda behind their beach cottage with a wedding ring on his finger. It meant the lines around his eyes and mouth that didn’t disappear anymore when he stopped smiling. It meant the streaks of silver in his still miraculously thick black hair.

Remus sat down next to him, breaking his reverie. He threaded their fingers together. Their wedding bands touched and warmed at the contact. They didn’t vibrate endlessly anymore now that the locator spell in the metal had relaxed.

“Happy birthday, darling,” Remus said, turning his chin so Sirius could look into those amber eyes that were as familiar as his own reflection.

“Thank you, love,” Sirius responded, kissing him softly.

[chlobliviate]

Wolfstar Microfic - Broom

Words: 970

@wolfstarmicrofic

🌙✨🌙✨🌙

When Sirius flung himself into a broom closet to hide from Filch, it hadn’t occurred to him that it might be occupied. It certainly hadn’t occurred to him that it might be occupied by Remus and Mary MacDonald.

Sirius spun to face the door and shut his eyes tight, “Sorry!” He whispered, hearing Filch in the corridor outside the door. “I didn’t know—” Was Mary giggling? Wait. Was Remus giggling? He turned to look at them warily and found them leaning against the back wall of the closet barely stifling their laughter. One look at Sirius’ face and Mary had to cover her mouth to stop the laughter.

Remus was chewing on his bottom lip, looking anywhere but at Mary or Sirius and his shoulders were shaking violently. Sirius noticed how thoroughly kissed his lips looked and the lines Mary's fingers had dragged through his hair and turned back to face the door. But that just made the giggling worse.

“Muffliato,” Sirius whispered and felt the familiar cocoon of the silencing spell and turned back to them. “The fuck is wrong with the pair of you?”

Remus and Mary made tentative eye contact before Mary let out an almighty snort and then they were off again. Sirius didn’t remember the last time he’d seen Remus laugh this hard. He felt very much like he was intruding.

“As soon as Filch is gone, I’ll go.” He said with a frown. “And you can go back to… whatever it was you were doing in here.”

“Remus was just talking about you, actually,” Mary said, between gasps for air.

“Shut the fuck up.” Remus shook his head and covered his face. “Sorry, Pads. We weren’t expecting company.”

“One rarely does in a broom closet Moony,” Sirius said tightly, and somehow that set Mary off again. “You smoked?” Remus smiled at him, one side of his mouth lifting higher than the other in that perfectly Moony way, and he immediately knew the answer to that question. “Right.”

“You were in detention.” Remus shrugged, “Didn’t know I needed your permission.”

Mary whispered something into Remus’ ear that made him flush crimson and then she had to lean on the wall because she was laughing so hard.

Sirius didn’t want to snap, but it felt like they were talking about him behind his back, in front of his face, and he didn’t like that at all. “I’ve obviously missed something.” He pressed his ear to the door, hearing nothing. “I’m going to—”

“No, you stay Sirius!” Mary stepped towards the door. “Filch isn’t looking for me, I’ll grab a cloth or something and if the coast is clear I’ll let you know.”

This felt suspicious, but Sirius nodded. When Mary poked her head out and then left the broom cupboard, she slammed the door behind her and they both heard it lock.

“Mary!” Remus called after her, before covering his mouth and staring at the corner of the room trying not to laugh.

“Since when do you and MacDonald smoke together?” Sirius leant back against the door and crossed his arms.

“Jealous?”

It wasn’t the response that Sirius was expecting, especially as he realised that he actually was jealous. “Didn’t know you liked her, that’s all.”

“Ah, no. Not like that.” Remus smiled again and Sirius wanted to shake him.

“I just walked in on the two of you kissing in a broom cupboard.” Sirius was unimpressed at how this entire evening had gone.

“And you’ve never kissed someone you’re not into in a broom closet?”

“Yeah, but I’m not you.” Sirius studied him. “So what’s going on if you’re not into her like that?”

“We wanted to test something.” Remus’ mouth twitched. “For science.”

Sirius frowned, “The fuck are you on about?”

“Recently, Mary has had feelings for someone, and she wanted to know what it meant. I’ve been going through something similar. It made sense to… you know, with someone we trust, and aren’t interested in.”

“Yeah, still none the wiser.”

“I wanted to know if I was still attracted to girls,” Remus said plainly. “Mary, the opposite.”

Sirius just blinked at him. “You think you like boys?

“No,” Remus’ smile dropped, “I know I like boys. I wanted to see if I still like girls too.”

Sirius’ brain malfunctioned. “You know?”

Remus laughed softly, “Yes. I know. Why? You offering to test that hypothesis if I wasn’t sure?” It was the wrong thing to say, Remus realised, as Sirius had gone very still, and was focused on the only broom in the inadequately stocked broom closet. “Pads, I’m joking.”

“So, are you into girls as well?” He asked quietly.

Remus nodded, “All signs point that way.”

“I don’t think I am.” It was barely a whisper and it took Remus a few seconds to digest this new information. “I don’t think I ever have been.”

“Oh.” Remus wasn’t laughing anymore. “How do you know?”

Sirius arched an aristocratic eyebrow. “How do you think?”

“Right, yeah.” Remus’ mouth was suddenly dry.

“So when Mary said you’d just been talking about me?” Sirius stepped away from the door, closer to Remus.

“She wanted to know how I realised I was attracted to boys,” Remus said, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. “So I told her about the time you fell on me when you tried to climb that tree by the lake.”

Sirius stared at him, “That was your gay awakening?”

“Bi, but yes. I don’t know if you’ve ever had your hot best friend literally fall from the sky into your lap, but that’ll do it apparently. Now you understand the giggling when you showed up, and Mary locking us in.”

Any signs of uncertainty vanished from Sirius as he grinned. “You know… falling into your hot best friends lap has similar effects.”

[alloftheimaginesblog]

an old friend, a new start {remus lupin}

plot: Fourteen years after graduating Hogwarts, you're offered a job to be the new Muggle Music Professor. Funnily enough, your old friend, Remus Lupin, is also offered a new job at Hogwarts that year.

character: remus lupin x female reader

note: this has potential to be multiple parts, if anyone's interested let me know cause i'd like to write more of it xx

You took a deep breath as you stepped out of the carriage to look up at the large, looming castle in front of you. Hogwarts. The castle really hadn't changed at all. It was still strikingly beautiful and so intricately built. Dumbledore took a lot of care to maintain Hogwarts and its grounds and it showed. You lifted your trunk off of the ground and made your way through the grounds to the Great Hall.

The last time you were here was fourteen years ago, the day you graduated. How times had changed. When you were last here, you and your friends were carefree and wild, excited to see what life had in store for you. When there had once been six of you, now only half survived. You hadn't spoken to the other surviving members of the Marauders in years, well Sirius had been sent to Azkaban for the murder of Peter Pettigrew (and you believed it was also for betraying James and Lily too. You and Remus fell out of contact a year or two after Peter's supposed death and Sirius's imprisonment. Life got in the way and it was too hard. There were too many memories and it was too painful so the two of you lost contact.

You often wondered about Remus. He had been your closest friend once upon a time and at one point, you had been head over heels for him but he never knew that. You would wonder about his life, how he was dealing with his condition, if he ever settled down...

Little did you know you'd be finding out sooner rather than later.

Professor McGonagall welcomed you as you walked into the Great Hall, "Ah, (y/n), dear, how lovely to see you after all these years." She greeted with a warm smile. She remained the same, a few more wrinkles around her warm eyes but she was the same, "Or should I say Professor." She had a twinkle in her eye, "I always did like seeing our students come back to be Professors."

You smiled, "Thank you, Professor," you said gratefully, glad that your first interaction was with a friendly familiar face.

"Oh," she said with a sweep of her hand, "call me Minerva... How does it feel to be back?"

"It feels good to be back actually... A little strange and bittersweet." You told her, looking around, "Their memories haunt me every single day but it's more intense here." Minerva looked around the Great Hall, agreeing, "I remember my first day getting sorted into Gryffindor and sitting beside Lily... She was my first friend here before I met the rest."

Her smile was wide and her eyes were a dazzling bright green colour, clashing yet complimenting her orange hair perfectly, "Here," she said, patting the space on the bench beside her, "sit with me, will you?" You gladly sat beside her as you introduced yourselves to the other, "It's all so exciting isn't it? Overwhelming but it's exciting to be somewhere we all belong."

You shook yourself out of the memory and apologised to Minerva but she tutted and gave you a warm smile, "Don't apologise, dear. Keep those happy memories of them alive, all of them." Even Sirius. Even though he betrayed the Potters' ending up getting them and Peter killed, "Speaking of the past, I do have some potentially upsetting news to tell you. Sirius Black escaped from Azkaban recently," you nodded, you'd read all about it. You'd seen his face plastered everywhere, crazed and wild, "James and Lily's son, Harry, he's a third year at Hogwarts... As you know Sirius is the godfather of Harry Potter and we fear that Sirius may try and come to kill the last surviving member of the Potter family."

You nodded as she explained the precautions Hogwarts was taking, "Dementors from Azkaban will be guarding Hogwarts. My honest advice is to stay out of their way, the scary buggers." You laughed slightly, "Just... Be on your highest guard. I've warned Remus too. You two know Sirius better than anyone."

You frowned, "Remus?" You asked, "He's here?"

Minerva looked at you puzzled, "Yes. Sorry, dear, forgive me, I just assumed the two of you would still be in contact."

"No... We haven't seen each other for about a decade actually. It was too painful. Too many painful memories."

Minerva nodded, "Well I hope that him being here and with Sirius on the loose, it may rekindle your friendship once again. The two of you were always the best of friends." You were. You and Remus did everything together, "I don't usually like to gossip on students but seeing as you graduated fourteen years ago, I always did think the two of you would be good together." She smiled, a twinkle in her eye, as you blushed furiously, "Anyway, he's our new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher. Do you want me to show you where your classroom is?"

"Still fifth floor, right?" You asked her to which she nodded, "I think I should be able to find it myself but thank you, Minerva." It would take a while to get used to calling her that, "Once I'm settled, we should catch up some more." Minerva smiled and agreed and then you walked away.

"Professor Lupin's classroom is on the third floor," she called after you. You didn't have to turn around to know that she would be smirking.

Hogwarts was huge with lots of winding staircases that ended up going to different places but it was like muscle memory. Your legs just knew which route to take. Instead of taking the quickest route to your new classroom, you took a bit of a scenic tour, just wanting to soak up everything old and everything new.

The silliest of memories resurfaced as you walked around.

"Look, Moony!" James grinned as Remus approached the two of you, "Padfoot's going to jump down this staircase. He believes he can do it without hurting himself."

Remus looked to you and you just shrugged, "I tried to stop him but it's Sirius, Rem. We'll never be able to control him." (It ended with Sirius spending a night in the hospital).

You turned a corner, finding yourself in front of a painting that you remembered.

You'd just happened across her standing looking at the painting. It was only your second day so you stopped to see if she was okay. "It's crazy," a first year Lily Evans said with a wide smile, "I'm Muggleborn so this is still all quite new to me but it still amazes me that paintings move."

"My dad's a Muggle," you said to Lily, "I kind of had the best of both worlds. I knew about magic but also knew and grew up with a lot of Muggle stuff like Muggle music, I love Muggle music."

"Oh my goodness," Lily grinned, "me too! Who's your favourite?"

"I love The Beatles-"

"No way!" Her smile was contagious, bright and so happy, "Oh (y/n), we're going to be such good friends."

Then you went through a rarely used shortcut through a painting and through a narrow staircase.

Remus coughed, "I suspect this is seldom used given how dusty it is... How did you find out about this secret passageway?"

You laughed, "Rem, I quite genuinely fell through the painting and landed on the stairs. I went up them and they got me to the fourth floor much quicker! Trust the process. Maybe next time we should bring a brush and do a bit of housekeeping?"

After leaving the passageway you wiped your robes down, they had gathered a lot of dust. You wondered whether or not all the other secret passageways and secret rooms you had once hidden in were still accessible and hidden. You'd need to investigate soon. You headed up a spiral staircase and then after a short walk through a hallway, you were standing in front of a classroom which said in large golden painted letters: MUGGLE MUSIC. You smiled and slowly pushed the door open.

"Oh it's brilliant," you said to yourself, clapping with glee after putting your trunk down. It was quite run down, maybe not loved as well as it should've been but getting it back up and running shouldn't be too much of a challenge. You wandered around the classroom, a fresh lick of paint on the walls, some newer instruments and maybe some plants and the classroom would look a lot better. The instruments you had were in relatively good condition but luckily for you, you had plenty of instruments in much better condition in your trunk.

"I learned a new charm!" Sirius grinned, "Check this out." He swung his bag off of his shoulder and began pulling out various textbooks and things alike.

Peter glanced at you, "What's the charm?" He asked sheepishly, "So far you've just made a mess."

Sirius rolled his eyes, "Use your head, Wormtail! Look at the size of my bag and look at the amount of books I just pulled out! That's not all-" he stopped talking and then pulled out, "made sure to pack my handy dandy hat stand."

"You stole a bloody hat stand?!" Remus hissed but even he couldn't hide the smile from his face, "Where's it from?"

Sirius winked, "Just borrowing it, Moony... from Slughorn's office. Anyway... who wants to learn the charm?"

That charm was your second favourite thing you learned at Hogwarts, the first was the charm that Lily taught you afterwards to keep your luggage or bag or whatever you were carrying light, never weighing more than a pound. You lay your trunk on one of the tables, opening it taking out the various instruments you'd carefully packed away. You put them in the instruments cupboard, you'd sort it another day, but just now you wanted to go to your room.

Your office was in the room adjacent to the classroom and then in the room attached to that was your living area. A small bedroom complete with a double bed, a wardrobe, a chest of drawers and then attached was a small kitchen and a bathroom. Your living space was small but more than enough. Your office was a desk, a chair and a few potted plants. There was a bookshelf with various books, a couch and a couple of tables and empty units. You would put your personal record player in here and also have one in the classroom but you would unpack your personal belongings soon. You sat on the bed as you looked around. You could hardly believe that this was your life now, that you were here once again... not only could you not believe that you were here again but so was Remus.

Remus.

You sat upright. He was already here, you knew he'd be in his classroom unpacking and getting ready for the term ahead. A bubble of nervousness suddenly appeared in your stomach as you stood and looked in the mirror that was on the wall. You looked tired but that was to be expected after a five hour journey. You smoothed out your hair and robes before leaving your classroom.

Defence Against the Dark Arts was on the third floor, you remembered exactly what it had once looked like. It was one of your favourite classes when you were a student, it was just fun learning new things and getting to practice magic.

It was then that you noticed someone familiar walking towards you. Inwardly you groaned but you plastered a smile on your face, "Fancy meeting you here, Severus."

Snape sneered at you, "(y/n)... How delightful." He had aged horribly. The same greasy hair, the same large pointed nose, the same dark beady eyes and the same scowl. It seemed he permanently scowled judging by the wrinkles on his forehead. In school, Snape was awful. He was rude, judgemental, bigoted and a bully. And yes, you would then agree that James and Sirius bullied him too but Severus had called his old best friend, Lily Evans, a mudblood and then acted as though he hated her whilst still pining over her. You just didn't like him and Snape, well, Snape didn't like anybody, "I just ran into the werewolf. Already asking me to concoct potions for his... time of the month." Always a cheap shot to make a joke about Remus's time of the month. It was Sirius's favourite thing to do once upon a time.

You nodded, "That's good of you to do that for him. I'm sure he appreciates it."

Snape looked at you displeased, "Obviously."

"Okay, great seeing you, Sev," you said quickly, needing away from him, "let's catch up soon?"

Snape scoffed, "No thank you."

"Ah," you said, patting his shoulder as you moved past him, "you've not changed at all, Sev. Always a pleasure!" Snape looked pissed off as you scampered past him but let's face it, he always looked pissed. You shuddered as you walked away. Fourteen years later and he still creeped you out.

You could hear chatter approaching and you realised that it was the students returning from their summer holidays, coming back to school. You straightened your robes one final time as you walked down the staircase to meet handfuls of older students who were walking up the stairs. You greeted them happily and most of them gave you at least a smile back. As you continued down the steps you saw-

"James?"

Your heart was in your throat, beating hard, as your stomach dropped. You stopped in the middle of the staircase as a young boy, third or fourth year, walked towards you. At the mention of his father's name, his head snapped to you. It was like looking through a window into the past. His hair was just as dark and just as messy. His grin was just as cheeky. He wore the same full moon glasses but his eyes... those were Lily Evans's eyes. You caught a glimpse of the lightening bolt scar on his forehead.

"Sorry, Harry, right?" You asked forcing yourself to smile, "I'm sorry, you just look so much like your father but-"

"I have my mother's eyes," Harry said with a nod and a smile, "Did you know them Professor...?"

"Oh (y/n). (y/n) (y/l/n). I'm the new Muggle Music Professor," you introduced yourself to him and his two, what you assumed to be, friends, "I was really good friends with your mother and father actually."

Harry's eyes lit up. All that poor boy wanted was to know about his parents, "You were? Professor do you think you could tell me about them?"

You stepped aside to let some other students pass, "Of course. Any time at all. My class is on the fifth floor, feel free to drop by whenever. How about we get settled in today and later this week you could come by? Bring your friends too if you wish," you gave a polite smile to Ron and Hermione, "Professor Lupin was also good friends with your parents, that's where I'm off to just now. To say hello to an old friend." Old friends and new starts.

The girl stuck out her hand which you shook gladly, "Hermione. Hermione Granger and this is Ronald Weasley."

The red haired boy rolled his eyes, "No one calls me Ronald, it's Ron, Hermione."

"All of us are taking Muggle Music actually so we'll be in your class." Hermione told you ignoring Ron.

"Yeah after you forced us to take your boring class-" Ron stopped realising that he was insulting your subject to your face, "I'm sorry, I'm sure it's not boring-" His cheeks turned bright pink, as did the tips of his ears.

You laughed, "That's alright. I assume it probably was boring but that'll change now that I'm here, I assure you, Ron. Anyway, I best let you three go to your Common Room and settle in. Come see me whenever you wish, all of you."

"Professor?" Harry said as you went to walk away, "You said Professor Lupin was a friend of my parents?" You nodded, explaining that you'd all been best friends at their age, "Do you think he would come too and tell me about my parents?"

You smiled, "I think that he'd love that, Harry. I'll say to him and we'll arrange something, alright?" You nodded at them once more before disappearing down the stairs and along the corridor. You hadn't seen Harry since he was a baby and goodness he was James's double just with Lily's eyes. Lily's lovely kind eyes. They'd be so proud. You had been so preoccupied you hadn't realised your feet had already taken you to the DADA classroom until you had stopped outside it and there he was. He was unpacking a box of trinkets onto his desk.

"Rem," you said quietly but his keen ears heard your voice and he stopped.

He raised his head and a wide smile grew on his face, "(y/n)," he said back, just as soft, "What are you doing here?"

"Gone and got myself a job. I'm the new Muggle Music Professor." Remus smiled. He knew about your love for Muggle music. It was something the two of you bonded over since Remus's mother was a Muggle too.

All the nerves you'd had about seeing him again vanished as he welcomed you into his arms. You forgot how tall he was, how he still towered over you. Your head was on his chest as you breathed deeply. He smelled the same; coffee and chocolate. A scent that was so comforting to you, so warm and friendly; he smelled like home. You liked that no matter how much time passed, he was still the same dorky Remus you once knew.

He pulled back, holding you at arms length to drink you in, "You look incredible."

You grinned, thanking him as your cheeks burned furiously. Life had not been kind to him, you could tell from the tattered clothes and the beaten up trunk in the corner. He looked in dire need of a sleep but he was still handsome, a little wearier and gaunt with a few extra wrinkles but those warm, honey brown eyes were the same. His scars were more silvery now, like his hair which was still light brown but had greys scattered amongst. He was still as handsome as you remembered but your heart panged knowing that life hadn't been as kind to him.

"So do you," you said with a smile.

Remus rolled his eyes, "Oh, hush," he laughed, "How have you been?"

You nodded, "Uh, yeah, good... Yeah. You?" Now it was time for the awkwardness to come.

Remus shrugged, "Can't complain now that I'm here."

"I met Snape," you told him after a moment of pregnant pause. You recounted the whole encounter, making Remus laugh loudly at how you ended the conversation.

"Bet he's gone off to dip his cloaks in detergent now that you've touched him."

"Still won't wash his hair though, will he?" You teased making Remus laugh again. That booming loud laughter that you loved to hear when you were sixteen.

When the laughter died down, you said, "Have you seen him yet? Harry, I mean." You sat on one of the tables and Remus sat on the one across from you.

He nodded, "Uncanny, isn't it?"

"I called him James. It was like looking into the past but with-"

"Lily's eyes."

You smiled, "They'd be so proud, wouldn't they?"

Remus sighed fondly, a ghost of a smile on his lips, "Oh you know that wherever they are Prongs is bragging all about their Chosen One of a son." You laughed and Remus's smile grew upon hearing your laughter. He'd missed hearing that sound.

"I missed you," he murmured, "I apologise for not being a very good friend."

You shook your head, "I'm sorry too... It was just too painful, Rem. It hurt to see you after... after losing everyone else, after Sirius." Remus nodded, "It still hurts even twelve years later. To see you was to not see them; a constant reminder that they're gone and that we're still here..."

"Survivor's guilt," Remus spoke quietly, "I'd went to therapy when I could afford it... That's what she called it." The two of you were silent for a while before he spoke, "And apparently Sirius is back to kill the last of the Potters'..."

"What happened?" You sighed, "How could he?"

Remus shook his head, "I've been asking myself that since it happened."

You sat up straighter, nudging his knee with your foot, "When I ran into Harry I'd told him that I was close with his parents, said that you were too... He's asked if we could both sit with him and tell him about his parents. The poor boy just wants to know who they were. Would you?"

"Course," Remus said, "Just let me know when and where."

You looked around the classroom. It was still pretty much the same as you remembered it to be just with added decoration on the ceiling, "It's not changed much," your voice was quiet, "it's nice to be back."

Remus stood and extended his hand to you, "Would you like to go do some exploring?"

You took his hand as you grinned, jumping down from the desk, "Oh, I'd love nothing more. Lead the way, Moony!"

And all of a sudden the two of you were sixteen again running around the corridors of Hogwarts keeping your friends in line.

"You're my best friend," Remus said, words slurred from the firewhisky. You were all laying on the floor in the Room of Requirement. James and Sirius were snoring loudly, Peter was hiccupping in a corner and you and Rem were on the floor facing each other, "I fancy you but you're my best friend first and forever." You giggled as he continued, "Don't ever leave me, I'd miss you too much, (y/n)."

As you walked with him, with the memory repeating in your mind, you couldn't help but latch onto his arm, head on his shoulder. His cheeks tinged pink as you did this so casually. Maybe things hadn't changed that much. Maybe things would be like how they once were. "I missed you, Remus... I think good things are in store for us both this year."

Oh please be right.

[crazyk-imagine]

Hi there, hope you're doing well. I would love to request a fic where the reader is Sirius Black's wife who reunites with him after he escapes from Azkaban, takes care of him e.g. feeding him and grooming him, and helping him get better. Cheers!

Part II: Coming Home to You

Pairing: Sirius Black x Wife!reader

Characters: Wife!reader, Sirius Black, Marlene McKinnon, Alice Longbottom, Dorcas Meadowes, Peter Pettigrew, Lily Evans nee Potter, James Potter, Remus Lupin

Warnings: Angst, fluff, lots of stuff going on, I needed some background into, the reader is super traumatized bc of her powers, Sirius has missed his girl for too damn long, sad but good reuniting, this series is getting away from me, there's a lot going on the more you read, writing the deaths or the memories really hurts guys, but I'm doing it for you all even though no one asked

Word Count: 3,880

*Soooo, this became part of a short series, enjoy :)

A/N: Don't forget to ask if y'all want to be apart of the tag list, I love it when y'all ask :) <33

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You close the door, securing the cottage with a few simple shield spells; a reoccurring task since Halloween night all those years ago.

The small stack of paper on your counter reminds you of why you left to get supplies in the first place.

You place the basket on the counter and reach for the papers, the gnawing feeling returns to your stomach.

You knew going to Hogwarts after the night Harry lost his parents and lost... family would never be an easy task.

Trying to ask McGonagall to write letters to inform you of everything going on wasn’t the safest option but you felt there was no other way for you to check in on things… and make sure Harry’s okay.

It’s been too long for him to remember you and you’re sure he’ll feel like you abandoned him.

You sigh, resting your hands on the countertop, overthinking about the endless possibilities again.

The pain in your heart worsens whenever you think about the sweet innocent child who's had to endure the weight of the cruel and evil world on his own in ways you hoped never would happen to him.

You wipe away the fallen tears, remembering when Dumbledore stopped you before you left Hogwarts, informing you that he felt it was safer if you weren’t in contact with the child.

You regret not leaving something for him to know you’re out there, to let him know he has a safe place or just- someone to talk to and know there's someone who will take care of him.

You sigh and open the letter, only to find no letter at all. “Oh, Merlin.” Sirius’ wanted poster, you’ve seen it before but this- this was new. “You escaped? Oh, for Merlin’s sake.”

You lift the paper closer to you, wondering if this is somehow a trick. You shake your head, "Sirius what are you trying to do?"

-

He never knew what happened to you once he entered his cell. Although he never gave up the thought of seeing you again.

That's what kept him going, the thought of his little bird waiting for him, fighting to get him out.

It was all he needed and the reason he paws at your door.

-

Scratches on your door startle you, causing you to nearly jump out of your skin. "Oh, Merlin!" You take a deep breath, placing your hand over your heart to calm you. ‘What the-’

An idea pops into your head, "is that you Kit?" As you make your way to the door, a shadow catches your eye. "Kit-" You blink as your jaw drops while staring at the dark-haired dog. "S- so it's true."

You gulp down the saliva that's built up in your throat. "You did it. You escaped." You shake your head, ordering him to get inside so you can close the door before anyone knows where you are. “Hurry up.”

He trails inside, standing beside the door, watching as you franticly spell the place. He lowers his head, not used to seeing you be so frantic and paranoid before.

You spin around and stare at him with a face of pain. "Change back," you order him, tears trickling down your cheeks. “Please change back. I need,” you take a deep breath. “I need to see you.”

He trails into the kitchen, not wanting you to see his disheveled, dirty, and scrawny body.

“Sirius?” You step closer to the kitchen entrance. “Don’t leave.”

How could he leave when he's just found you?

He steps out, stopping in front of you.

“Is this real?”

“I should be the one asking you that,” he responds with a scratchy voice as if he hasn’t talked in a… while.

You can’t hold back anymore and wrap your arms around him, crying into him, burrowing your head deeper into his neck. "I've missed you so much."

His arms shake as he raises them, wanting to hug you back but feeling as though he is unworthy to do so.

Your arms tighten around him, "you can hug me, hug me as tight as you can and don't let go."

His fingers dig into the fabric of your shirt.

You pull back, letting him continue to keep his grasp on you. "How are you?"

He stares at you.

"What's wrong?"

He doesn't realize it until he's hunched over, gripping your shirt tightly in his grasp.

You hold the man as he breaks down, whispering comforting words into his ear. giving him the comfort and safety, he hasn't had in over a decade.

Eventually you get him to let go and the two of you sit down at the kitchen table. "Why are you here, Sirius?"

"A man can't come by to see his wife."

You purse your lips. "A man can but you're not just any man, you forget I've known you since we were children."

He zones out, keeping his gaze on the table.

You wander towards your cabinets, fixing something for him to drink. You place it down in front of him. "Drink it."

His eyes lazily glance over it before turning to you. "What's in it?"

"Do you trust me?"

He pauses, raising a brow. Do you know? "Have you given me a reason not to?"

You shrug, "you tell me."

He's never known you to be so harsh, even if you're not acting like it. "Would you poison the only person who cares enough to find you?"

"Or maybe you knew where I was."

"Are you waiting for me to- to do something?"

“Would you?”

“Do you even know what I went through? I-”

You slam your hands on the table and push yourself up, “no, Sirius.” You angrily point your finger in his face. “You don’t know what I went through when you- when you walked out of here, leaving me on my own.”

“You were safer here.”

“I was left to fight the traitor of our friend group.”

He pauses, turning towards you; if he had animalistic features, his ears would be tucked down along with his tail being stuck between his legs. “What are you talking about?”

Were the rumors true?

Had you been left to deal with Peter once he left?

His gaze moves onto the floor, feeling shame because he couldn’t protect his friend, nay his brother and his wife but to find out he put you in danger… Merlin, that hurts.

He’s been hurt before, his heart broke worse than it did when he thought he was in love with his first girlfriend (granted he was in his third year) but this is a different kind of pain; he’s genuinely hurt. It feels as if his heart is close to breaking.

"I do understand, Sirius and-” You throw yourself onto him, hugging him tightly against you, kissing the top of his head before pulling back to stare into his glossy eyes, wiping away the stray tears that trickle down his cheeks. “When you went to Azkaban. You- I thought I lost you.”

“You didn’t,” he huffs. “Now you have a cowardly husband.”

“Who says he is cowardly?” You sniffle. “Who? Tell me so I can handle them.”

“I am. You honestly can’t tell me otherwise, can you?”

You nod, staring at him with those loving eyes he’s only been told have been directed at him more than a dozen times by… them.

To see them for himself when he’s at his lowest, Merlin, you know how to make a man’s heart race.

“I can because no other man, other than yourself, would put himself in the most dangerous situation he could the way you did.”

“I left before I could protect you properly.”

“No, no. If you had been here, it would have been bad. We wouldn’t have been able to focus, you know, because we’d be worried about the other. Besides, I knew how to handle, Pettigrew.”

His head has never moved this fast (other than the time when Lily gossiped to Marlene, Alice, and Dorcas about you liking the man). “It was the rat.”

“Sirius now is not the time to get upset,” you say, wanting him to calm down.

“Calm down? Calm down! That damned rat is the reason we lost James and Lily, why Harry lost his parents, and we lost the only other people we could call family! And you want me to calm down!”

You cross your arms and raise your brow.

He takes a deep breath, sitting down once more. “Fine, I’m calm.”

“Did you, do it?”

“Do what?” He wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you closer, staring up at you with the same expression he did when you two started dating: eyes full of love, a smile full of mischief.

“Were you able to get revenge on him?”

“Nope much like an actual rat, he escaped.”

“He’ll be back again.”

“Yeah,” his face turns sour.

“Come,” you grab his hand, pulling him with you.

“Oh.”

You don’t have to turn around to wiggle his brows.

“You’re taking a bath.” You stand in front of the door with your arms crossed.

His eyes widen.

“Just because your animungus is a dog, doesn’t mean you get to act like a big cat.”

“I, on behalf of my animungus, is highly offended.”

“Yes, well, I don’t care.” You turn around to open the door and leave, wanting to give him the privacy he needs (and deserves).

His hand wraps around your arm, keeping you in place. Against all his judgment he does the one thing he didn’t want to. “Don’t leave.”

You close your eyes, never imagining hearing him sound so small. “Okay,” you spin around.

“I’ll stay.” You don't need to hear him say thank you, him coming home to you is enough. You tell him to stay where he is while you use a spell to fill the bathtub with water. You gesture for him to go get in.

“You're going to watch me?”

You nod, remembering when you were younger, and Remus took you guys to the muggle pool, and he said the same phrase.

Remus had opened the door and guided you all into the area. "Alright, everyone find a chair."

Sirius takes a seat beside you, not a surprise to anyone.

You take the sunscreen from Lily, watching over her and James, making sure they don't slip as they run and jump into the pool.

"You need help getting your back?"

You glance over your shoulder and raise a brow. "Really?"

He raises his hands, letting out a long, "what? I'm offering my service, helping a fellow marauder out."

"As if."

He offers a mischievous smile before standing up.

Your eyes follow his movements.

"You're going to watch me?" He asks, reaching for the bottom of his shirt.

"I need-"

“I need to make sure you don't fall in.”

He nods, knowing what you were referring to.

“I can turn around while you-”

“No, no,” he shakes his head. “It's fine. I'm- it's fine.” He worries you won't want him anymore with how he looks now, nothing like his old self, he knows. He unties the makeshift tie he made and lets his pants fall.

You hold your breath, not wanting to cough as the dust and dirt flies up into the air around you.

He slowly undoes the buttons, wanting to prolong his unveiling as much as he can.

You huff and stand in front of him, shaking his hands off you as you do so. “Sirius,” one button done. “Orion,” another. “Black,” you release the front of his shirt, letting it rest against his chest. You cup his cheeks, “you have nothing to be ashamed of, do you hear me? I married you, not because of your looks, although it is a plus.”

The corner of his lips curve upwards, you know you've got him.

“I don't care if you are not as you were all those years ago because if you weren’t you wouldn't have come back to me. I am going to give you all the love and praise you deserve because you do, and I will help you. We will do this together because we are better together, remember?”

“You only said that so I wouldn't miss the game for that girl.”

“And we still won.”

“I won that game.”

“Did you now?” You remove his shirt, letting it fall to the floor with his pants, guiding him towards the bath.

“We both know I did.”

“I don't know,” you say coyly. “Tell me again, how you won the game?”

“I’ve never been one to brag-”

You scoff, helping him into the tub. “That’s all I knew you did, even before we became friends. James had to do a lot of persuading.”

“He did?”

You nod, grabbing the off your bathroom sink. “Oh yeah. It took him a while too. He knew I wasn’t going to budge but seeing the way you were with him and Moons, it may have helped with Prongs’ persuading.”

“I never knew that.”

You smile at the man, scooping a cup full of water, holding it up for him to get the hint.

He scoots forward.

“I told him not to tell you. Ever, or else I’d have him be my tester for new spells and… other things.”

He closes his eyes, enjoying the warmth of the water and your fingers running through his hair. “When was that?”

“When he realized I liked you.”

“How long before we actually became friends?”

You don’t answer.

“Little bird?”

A wistful sigh escapes you, thinking back to your younger years. “Not long.”

“So, you’re admitting I could have asked you out sooner.”

“No, definitely not. We met when we were supposed to.”

“Is that what you told him?”

“That’s what I believe.”

He opens his eyes and stares at you. “How did I get so lucky to find you?”

“James found you and took you in.”

“More stray jokes,” he mutters. “Very nice.”

“You always knew you were special, don’t act like you aren’t.” You grab the cup, “close your eyes and tilt your head back.” You forgot to put up the mental block, being this close to someone after so long; images of him being taken and left in that cell flash through your mind along with his laughter.

You gulp and finish taking care of him.

He sits on your perfectly made bed and stares at the floor.

You lean against the doorframe, taking him in. “Why did you come back?”

His head tilts up, tired eyes staring at you. “Huh?”

“Why did you come back?”

“Are you saying I’m not welcomed by my wife?”

“I’ve said no such thing since you’ve arrived,” you snarl at him. “I’m only asking because I know you and if you know who did anything to you, you’d get revenge like the time James took your hair products resulting in the Black frizz of 74’ and you turned his hair green for a month. So, I ask again, why are you here?”

He brushes his freshly cleaned hair out of his face. “I found him.”

“Found who?”

He slams his hands down on the bed sheets. “I found that rat!” His face scrunches in pain.

“What- are you okay?” You rush towards him.

“I’m- I’m fine,” he tries to reassure you.

“You are not fine.” You grab your wand, waving it around him. “Is that better?”

“What’d you do?”

You shrug, “something to ease your pain until we get to the kitchen.”

“You trying to seduce me, little bird?”

You pull him with you, keeping him behind you. “I don't need to do much to seduce you if I needed to.”

“Is that a fact?”

“It is, because I know you inside and out no matter how much you deny it.” 

You gesture for him to sit down at the kitchen table while you riffle through your cabinets. “The others would say all I ever needed to do was so much as breathe in your direction.”

You turn, eyes widening upon the sight of your husband standing there, beside you. “Really?”

You nod before telling him to sit down. “I- I need space to prepare this for you.”

An amused smile dances across his lips. “Is that all you need me to do little bird?”

“It is, if you would just, please-”

“They told me the same thing.”

“About what?”

You move around him.

“They told me all I needed to do was look at you and you'd be at my feet, willing to do whatever I asked.”

You scoff, avoiding making eye contact with him, not wanting him to see the faint flush in your cheeks. “As if.” 

"If that's the case," he places his arms on either side of you, caging you in against the counter, leaning closer to your ear. "Why are you so red?"

You huff and elbow him, "go sit."

He holds his abdomen and smiles at you, even though you aren't looking.

You shake your head and continue working on the potion, a sense of deja vu flooding through you, thinking back to the times when you'd help him make potions for Moons after you found out about his condition.

You and Remus share eye contact.

"You know?"

You hesitate to nod.

"And you're not scared?"

"I know you, I've seen the scars. You hurt yourself more to protect everyone." You place the bottle in his hands, "this is the least I could do to try and help you. I know it's not much but-"

"This means more than you could know."

You fight the urge to let out a wide smile, knowing what the others are planning. "I wouldn't say that just yet."

You shake your head and finish with the potion and start preparing the meal you were going to make before... the re-arrival of your husband.

“Drink this,” you place the potion beside his hand, followed by the plate of food. “Eat this after or else you’ll get nauseous. Eat what you can and don’t force it down.”

He nods, listening to your words with all he can until he notices there’s only one plate for him. “Where’s your plate?”

“Oh, I’m- uh- I’m not hungry.”

“Liar, I hear your stomach growling. Sit with me.”

“I have too much to do, I- you need your energy more than I need it. Please just, eat some and then I’ll sit with you once I’m done.”

“No,” he shakes his head, fighting you. “I have been locked away for twelve years,” he holds onto your arm, preventing you from walking away. “I barely got to speak to our godson, I- I need you.”

“Sirius-”

“No, please just- just eat with me and if things are too different, I’ll- I’ll leave.”

You place your hand on his, squeezing his hand once seeing the fear in his eyes. “I won’t, just let,” you take a breath, “let me make something for us to share for old time sakes, okay?”

He slowly nods his head.

You let go of his hand and wander back into the kitchen, riffling through the cabinets and your basket, only to find ingredients for your favorite bread you two would share all the time during your shared time at Hogwarts.

‘Guess I knew beforehand yet again.’

Once it’s done you pull it out of the oven and place it on the counter. “I made it the same way the elves did.”

“You got their recipe?”

You shrug, not wanting to admit the truth. “I cannot confirm nor deny your statement.”

“Never been one to say yes but I know, I know the truth, little bird.”

“That’s why we work so well together.” You place the bread in front of him. You stare at him, curious as to what is going on inside his head.

“It’s weird, isn’t it?”

“What is?”

“This is the first time we’ve been together since we lost them.”

“Yeah… I know.”

“Have you seen him?”

“Who?”

“Harry.”

You quiet down, “no.”

“He knows about you, about us.”

“He does?”

He nods, “and Moons condition.”

“Oh my- it was a full moon yesterday, wasn’t it? No wonder you’re in so much pain. Why didn’t you tell me?” You push yourself out of your chair, holding his head in your hands; you gulp at the sight of him running with Harry and then nothing. “Are you okay?”

“I'm fine, concerned about Moons... and you.”

You hold in a groan as you release him, offering a small smile. “You don’t need to worry about me, I’m a big girl. I can handle myself.”

“Just because you can,” he explains while holding your hand, “doesn’t mean you have to.”

“I know,” you tell him, trying not to get into a vaguely familiar talk with him. “And I’m not just saying that.”

“We should go see him tomorrow.”

You narrow your eyes at the man. “Do you not remember the fact that you escaped from prison and are now a wanted man because I’m sure that everyone within a fifteen-mile radius knows and will bring you right back to that cell.”

“They don’t know my animungus.”

“That doesn’t help your situation.” 

“Who would know?”

“Me.”

“Other than you.”

“Harry? Moons?”

“One, the boy doesn’t know and two, Moony is a solid mate.” He explains, knowing you guys were always there, supporting him to no end.

“It’s dangerous.”

“When has it ever been safe?”

You scoff through your nose. “Are we seriously arguing over your life right now? You say you came back for me, but you keep throwing yourself into danger. How am I supposed to close my eyes and pretend like everything is okay when I don’t even know if you’ll be here the next day.”

“It’s to protect those I love.”

You clench your jaw, holding in your sobs. “What about-”

A tap on the door interrupts you. You can sense it’s Kit and open the door, letting the cat hop into your arms.

“Who’s that?”

“Kit.”

“Why do you have a cat?”

“I found him.”

He narrows his eyes at the feline. “Why is it here?”

“He’s been the only company I’ve had for the last few years.”

“He doesn’t seem to like me much,” he notes, due to the way the cat seems to glare at him.

“He senses your different but,” you lean down and whisper into the little cats' ears.

The furry creature seems to have calmed down a bit and stares at the man with wonder.

“It’s a boy and I merely told him you mean no harm.” You return to your place in front of him and continue to eat your meal.

He doesn’t plan on staying the night, not wanting to endanger you.

“I don’t know where you're going but please don’t leave me alone again.”

He smiles in return. “I’ll be back, I’ve never broken my promise, have I?”

You shake your head. “I don’t want to lose you again.”

“You won’t. I’m a man now.”

A mix of a sniffle, chuckle, and a cough escape you. “You’re barely a man.”

“I knew you’d remember.”

You tilt your head, “how can I forget? All of the memories we made were the only thing helping me through the loneliness.”

-

Previously: Part I // Continue to: Part III

-

Tag list

@kmc1989 @imthebadguyyy @twinkletwinklenotastar @abaker74

@callsignwidow @dreamingofmarauders @comboboo

[wastingmylifesecondatatime]

Maurauders Era Masterlist - Series

NOTE: If you have any fic suggestions feel free to write me! Updated: 18.11.2024 🔞 = mature ✔ = completed Other masterlists: mother masterlist; Harry Potter masterlist, Maurauders Era Masterlist - One Shots/Drabbles

Marauders

NEW ADDITIONS:

Nothing today...

James and Sirius and Remus and Lily and *takes a dramatic breath* you? by @ellecdc ​(added: July 29th, 2024)

↳ “poly!Marauders + Lily x shy!Reader who is so smitten with them”

↳ Chapters: 5/?

James Potter

NEW ADDITIONS:

✔ I thought you'd be different by @livinginshambles ​(added: June 7th, 2024)

↳ “A Cinderella story (maybe a little Romeo and Juliet while we're at it) but Hogwarts - Enemies-ish to lovers. You find an enchanted parchment through which you anonymously talk to a stranger (James). When you meet him at the Yule ball, he is not who you expected, but you give him a chance. When you realize that was clearly a mistake, you flee Cinderella style.”

↳ Chapters: 3/3

✔ I thought you'd be different by @livinginshambles ​ (added: June 7th, 2024)

↳ “A Cinderella story (maybe a little Romeo and Juliet while we're at it) but Hogwarts - Enemies-ish to lovers. You find an enchanted parchment through which you anonymously talk to a stranger (James). When you meet him at the Yule ball, he is not who you expected, but you give him a chance. When you realize that was clearly a mistake, you flee Cinderella style.”

↳ Chapters: 3/3

No Longer Yours by @singmyaubade​​

↳ “ James had disregarded you for multiple years, but when you have an epiphany in your final year, how does it feel to taste his own medicine? ”

↳ Chapters: 4/?

Sirius Black

NEW ADDITIONS:

✔ Tear Stains by @sleep-i-ness ​ (added: Nov 18th, 2024)

↳ “Y/N was dumped by James Potter and she doesn’t quite know why. At least she has her friends to keep her company, right? Hogwarts drama is a bit messy this year.”

↳ Chapters: 10/10

✔ Tell a Tale of You and Me by @omgrachwrites ​ (added: Nov 18th, 2024)

↳ “You knew that making a bet with Sirius Black was like making a deal with the devil but you just couldn’t help yourself. You had never been a heavenly woman.”

↳ Chapters: 23/23

Hate that I want you by @draqcnheartstrinq

↳ “ At first it’s hate, then it’s confusion. It grows into a healthy amount of curiosity until it turns into hate once more. But not towards each other, more towards the idea of wanting what you’ve tried to avoid all your life.”

↳ Chapters: 6/?

Lust life by @ausfortheheart

↳ “you've been hooking up with james potter over the summer, but when you return to hogwarts you find yourself drawn to his best friend. you've adamantly hated sirius black throughout your school years, and you're sure the feeling's mutual... or you were“

↳ Chapters: 3/?

Regulus Black

NEW ADDITIONS:

Nothing today...

Once Upon A Time by vampirestookmydoubts

↳ “Where the reader travels back to the past and has to decide if she saves Regulus, or if she lets fate go its course.”

↳ Chapters: 8/?

✔🔞 Second Son by @cherryslyce​​

↳ “Forbidden from contacting Harry over the summer, you opt to explore the eerie halls of Grimmauld Place where you stumble upon a lonely portrait of the House's second son.”

↳ Chapters: 20/20

[ourloveisforthelovely]

Running from the Daylight (Part 2 Final)

Regulus Black AU

Request: @iluvthe-marauders HI LOVELYYY, HAVENT HAD TUMBLR IN AGESSSSS. Dont know if you remember but i was the one who asked for different harry potter characters and wanted to ask if you'd do a regulus oneshot. where y/n is a halfblood (Remus’ sister) and they run away together?

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader

Rating: T

Link to Part 1

______

Remus and Sirius arrived back home after midnight to a quiet house. Sirius stood tapping his foot as Remus unlocked the door.

“I can’t believe you didn’t get me cotton candy.”

Remus rolled his eyes before opening the door.

“I can not help that the theater’s cotton candy machine was down. I promise we will go back next week and get you some.”

Sirius scoffed.

“I’ll take Y/n to a movie. She will get cotton candy too.”

Remus chuckled. He made a mental note to tell you that you needed to tell Sirius no more often. You treated him like some kind of pet, making Remus’ life difficult.

“You can be really annoying sometimes. You are aware of that, right?”

Remus said over his shoulder as he tossed his coat on the couch. Sirius was chuckling to himself as he moved to go get a beer out of the refrigerator.

“Yeah, but you love me so there.”

Remus smirked while shaking his head. He was not about to feed into Sirius’ foolishness (no matter how right he was on the subject). A small envelope on the coffee table caught Remus’ attention. It had both his and Sirius’ names on the front.

Frowning, Remus walked over and picked the envelope up. Right away, Remus noticed your handwriting.

“Is she leaving us love notes again?”

Sirius asked, coming back into the room while shoving popcorn into his mouth. Remus rolled his eyes.

“She’s probably begging me to marry you so you don’t go get lost some place.”

Sirius gave Remus a cold glare as his lover tore open the envelope.

“To Sirius and Remus, By the time the two of you read this, I will be out of contact. There have been many things that I have been hiding and it is time that the both of you know. I have been dating Regulus for a while. We are running away together. This is the only way that we can be together and no one have a problem with it. Remus, I know you of all people won’t be happy. You are my big brother and I love you but you need to let me make my own decisions. If I was honest and told you that I was dating Regulus, you would have flipped. Please know that I am not doing this to hurt you. I hope, in time, we can meet again and put this behind us. I beg you to take care of yourself and I love you. Sirius, I want you to know that you were right about Regulus. There is more to him than some cold member of the Black family. He isn’t a death eater and no longer “drinks the family koolaid.” He and I….we are what each other needs. Regulus is still your brother and he loves you. I hope to see the two of you sooner rather than later. I’m sorry but I have to go.

Love, Y/n.”

Remus stared at the letter with his mouth open. Sirius shoved a few more mouthfuls of popcorn in his mouth before realizing that Remus had gone dead silent.

“Moony, what…”

“Y/n ran off with Regulus!”

Sirius stood motionless. He tilted his head as if he was trying to process what his lover actually said. Did Sirius hear Remus right? You ran off with Regulus? Why would you run off with Regulus? Did you even know Regulus? Sirius had never witnessed the two of you speak to each other.

“Regulus? Like my brother Regulus?”

Remus ran a hand through his hair, fighting the urge to start jumping up and down.

“How many other guys named Regulus do you know?”

Sirius held his hands up defensively.

“Just my brother. Why would Y/n run off with Regulus? Do they even know each other apart from us?”

Remus handed Sirius the letter. Sirius frowned as he read the letter, his eyes widening with each word. While he wanted to panic that you jumped ship with his little brother in the middle of the war…he couldn’t. Sirius read your words to him about “being right about Regulus.” Regulus wasn’t a bad guy.

“Regulus is still my little brother, after all.”

Sirius smiled at the thought. His little brother…the real Regulus…the boy Sirius adored so much was still in there. Sirius also smiled at the thought of you being the one who gave him this information. You would be good for Regulus just as Remus was good for him. Sirius could live with that.

“Sirius, say something.”

Remus ordered, feeling on edge. He didn’t know what he was going to do but he needed to do something. Remus was nearly ready to go run about the neighborhood looking for you. Sirius took a breath before speaking.

“Remus, I need you to breathe, mate. Look, I didn’t know about this either. I have my concerns but…they are like us. Maybe Y/n is good for Reg. Let’s give them a chance. Let them come to us.”

Remus paced around quietly for a moment.

“She’s my sister, Sirius.”

Sirius nodded before moving to put a hand on the small of Remus’ back.

“She will always be your sister but for right now Y/n is what Regulus needs. Trust me.”

(two weeks later)

The sound of a tea kettle whistling woke you up from a sound sleep. Yawning, you reached over to Regulus’ side of the bed. His pillow was cold indicating that he had been up for some time. You stretched with a smile before slowly getting out of bed and looking out the window.

You would never get tired of the sight in front of you. Everything was peaceful. Waking up in a quaint little cottage with a field of wildflowers near a lake was your own personal heaven. From the moment that you arrived at the cottage life changed completely. You had gone from being stuck in the middle of a war with no idea how the future would play out to pure blissful peace.

The sound of a small bang in the kitchen tore you from your thoughts. Regulus muttering “son of a bitch” made you smile.

Regulus

That was another thing that you couldn’t help but smile about. In the course of two weeks, you had seen Regulus make a complete change. Now he was no longer the brooding moody young man who always looked mad at the world. He smiled more than you had ever seen him smile before. You noticed how much Regulus being happy reminded you of Sirius. Happy was exactly how you loved seeing Regulus.

Your mind went back to the morning that you arrived at the cottage…

“This place hasn’t changed since I was a child.”

Regulus commented as he sat his bag down. You were looking around the cottage with a pleased little smile on your face.

“It's lovely. I can see why your uncle bought that place.”

Regulus nodded as he started looking through the cabinets.

“As much as Alphard loved our family, he loved being in peace that much more. He saw the cracks and crazy in the Black family. Thank Merlin he saw a way out and away from it all.”

You turned to face Regulus as he took off his suit jacket and started rolling his sleeves up.

“Now we can have our peace.”

You replied as Regulus’ grey eyes rolled up your face.

“Yes, we can. We can have our happily ever after without this stupid war or whatever garbage is going on back in reality land. Maybe in time, Remus won’t hate me for conning you into running away with me.”

You moved to wrap your arms around Regulus’ neck.

“You didn’t do any conning. I wanted to leave as much as you did. I’m not brave like my brother and friends. I don’t want to be involved in some war where people I love on both sides die.”

Regulus frowned before wrapping an around your waist.

“You are braver than you know. You left everything behind for some boy who never deserved a moment of your grace and love.”

“The boy who deserved all of the grace and love.”

You countered with a smile. Regulus leaned his forehead against yours. He didn’t know that you saw the happy smile on his face…but you did.

“Well..if you say so. You know, we’ve never had the opportunity to dance together.”

You couldn’t help the chuckle as Regulus slowly began to move with you in his arms.

“We’ve never had the opportunity.”

Regulus nodded.

“Now we do. Every day…anytime that you want.”

The bedroom door opening pulled you from your thoughts. Regulus stepped in with a small smile on his face.

“Sorry, I didn’t wake you…did I?”

You shook your head before moving to snuggle back into your boyfriend’s waiting arms.

“No…I heard you fighting with the stove.”

Regulus rolled his eyes.

“That damned thing is a menace. We might have to invest in a new one before I catch that one on fire. I see why Kreacher hated our stove at Grimmauld Place now.”

Regulus didn’t have to say it for you to know that he missed Kreacher. That was the only part of his family that he missed.

“We can get a new one whenever you want or you can let me do the cooking. I admire you for trying but I was born to cook on shitty stoves.”

Regulus rolled his eyes before looking back at the bed.

“You haven’t made the bed yet.”

You nodded.

“I just got out of it.”

Regulus reached out to gently push the strap of your nightgown off of your shoulder.

“We can mess it up a little more before you make it up…for the day.”

Wrapping your arm around his shoulders, you stood on your tiptoes kissing Regulus slowly.

“I love that idea.”

Right as things were starting to get heated there was a loud knock at the door. Regulus pulled away as you reached for your silk robe.

“Who the hell is that? We don’t have friends. That is the problem with visitors. They always come visiting.”

You grabbed your wand and followed Regulus down the stairs. Part of you was wondering if it was the friendly widow who lived down the road a bit. The other part worried that it was some member of the Black family to attempt to drag Regulus home.

“Do you have your wand?”

Regulus whispered.

“Armed and ready to go.”

You replied as Regulus moved to the front door. He was ready to hex whoever the hell it was to kingdom come and back.

The moment that he opened it, Regulus was shocked to see Sirius on the other side. Sirius stood holding what looked like a geranium in a tacky ceramic pot while Remus stood behind him looking super uncomfortable.

Regulus tilted his head to the side while you came to join him at the door. You were clearly as surprised as Regulus was.

“Hello?”

Regulus managed to get out while Sirius smiled.

“Hello, happy couple…I brought you a plant.”

Sirius held out the geranium to his younger brother with a grin. Regulus slowly took the flower with an uncomfortable expression.

“Um, thanks. How did you two find us?”

Sirius glanced over his shoulder praying that Remus had listened to that whole “be nice and don’t strangle him” talk.

“Can we come in?”

You moved aside as did Regulus. Sirius and Remus walked in closing the door behind them.

“Did you two steal this from the old woman down the street? I saw her potting this plant last week.”

Regulus commented before sitting the geranium down. Sirius shrugged.

“She won’t miss it. So….here we are and here you are.”

Regulus nodded, sitting down.

“Yes. Here we are. Again, how did you find us?”

Sirius grinned.

“Uncle Alphard told me after I wrote him.”

“How long?”

Remus finally commented. Both Regulus and yourself turned to face your older brother. You could see the unease in Remus’ eyes. How he was remaining calm was a mystery.

You placed a hand on Regulus’ shoulder before speaking to Remus directly.

“Two years.”

“Two years!!?? The two of you have been dating for two years and no one said a word. Y/n, this is big. You could have married this man by now…wait, you two aren’t married are you?”

Regulus raised an eyebrow before holding up your hand that had a diamond ring on it.

“Not yet but we will be. This is exactly why we didn’t tell you, Lupin. You are spazzing out and acting ridiculous. Family reactions are the reason why we didn’t say anything. My family would never accept Y/n and would potentially hurt her. You are…well…you are acting as I expected.”

Remus went instantly silent before muttering “fuck me” under his breath. He took a few deep breaths before speaking. Looking at your face, Remus stared at you hard for a few moments. No longer were you the little girl that chased after him always wanting to be part of her big brother’s activities. Now you were a grown woman with a life of her own…a grown woman who deserved to have the life that she wanted.

Regulus was busy watching Remus hoping the other man didn’t burst into a fit of tears. He was not ready to deal with that!

“I apologize…to both of you. You have to understand that is my only family left, Regulus. Outside of Sirius, Y/n has been my forever friend. It hurts knowing that both of you felt this was the only option…but I understand. I was wrong to judge your happiness. Y/n, is this what you want?”

You squeezed Regulus’ shoulder.

“It is, Remus. I love Regulus very much. He’s very good to me and I’m happy. I know you are worried but I want you to be happy for me. I found my person must like you found yours….your plant stealing person.”

Sirius giggled. Remus stared at Sirius before shaking his head.

“Yeah, my plant-stealing person. Fine, if you two are happy then I’m happy for you. Regulus, please take care of her.”

Regulus reached up to squeeze your hand that was resting on his shoulder.

“I would die for her.”

Sirius stood up clapping his hands together before going off in search of breakfast.

“Now that is out of the way…who is going to feed me breakfast? You two should have seen the mad dash we made to get here.”

_____

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[querkynchaotic]

Obliviate

mary macdonald microfic - canon compliant

(quoted choices by messermoon for dumbledore's first line)

The first time she thought about it was when Marlene died.

It had been months since she had used magic and years since she had stepped foot into Diagon Alley. Actually, after Hogwarts ended, the only time she had seen a wizard or a witch who wasn't one of her friends was in St Mungo's, when Lily had given birth to Harry.

The problem is, once you think about something, there is no unthinking it. The more she tried to get that idea out of her head, the more she thought about it. And as things got worse, that little voice in the back of her mind became more and more oppressive.

"What if you just forgot about it all ?"

Forget about the bullying in school, the glares, the insults, the double standards, the spells behind her back. The death eaters who had already killed so many of her friends. The attacks on Muggles she felt were directed against her. Knowing who had done it, knowing why, and having to hear the explanations the muggle news gave. Knowing the truth.

Knowing became too much. And she understood why they all wanted to fight -- James Potter wouldn't be James Potter if he wasn't risking his life to make the world a better place -- but she just. Didn't have anything to fight for. The wizarding world didn't mean as much to her as it did to them, and she didn't see why she would fight for a place where she was so unwelcome.

So she thought about it. Forgetting everything. But there was too much to forget. And Lily was still here, Sirius was still here, and they needed her. She couldn't be that selfish and let them down.

So, she only thought about it. As something to calm herself in the middle of the night, the kind of horrible thought that weirdly brings you comfort, thinking "if everything goes to shit, I'll just forget about it."

She just never imagined it would get that bad.

Because after Marlene died, Dorcas went a bit crazy. And then she died. And then Lily disappeared. When Harry was 6 months old, her and James went MIA. Sirius wouldn't tell her anything, they mostly talked about Remus, and the more they did, the more Mary wondered how they would ever come back from that. But she never wondered if they would come back from that. I mean, they were Sirius and Remus, for goodness' sake.

And then.

And then.

And then Lily died. And James. And Sirius had betrayed them. And he had killed Peter. And the world fell apart.

She's in Dumbledore's office with Petunia Dursley, ready to leave, when Dumbledore says :

“You will leave Harry Potter where he is. You will not speak to him, you will not write to him, you will have no contact with him at all.”

She feels like she's in a dream. She's outside of her own body, watching herself in that office, with that man. Right now, she doesn't see a war hero, or a rebel, or a headmaster : she sees the reason why so many of her friends are dead. No, not "so many" : all of them. Because the two who are left might as well be.

"He can't..." Her voice sounds weird, like she's hearing it on tape. Like it's someone else speaking. It's completely void of emotion, as well. It catches her off guard. But maybe she doesn't have anything left to feel. "He can't know I exist ?"

The old man smiles, all trace of coldness gone. "I'm glad we understand each other."

"Then I want you to obliviate me".

The voice in her head isn't a voice in her head anymore. It's not an intruder telling her "you could forget about it" ; it's her thinking "I'm going to forget everything". It's her saying it out loud.

"I beg your pardon ?"

"You heard me. You want me to leave Harry alone ? That's the thing I ask in return." Her voice is mechanic, daring, like her emotions are turned off. Usually, that's not a good thing, because it's even more of a mess when you turn them back on. Hopefully, this time, she won't have to go through that.

"I don't understand. What are you asking ?"

God, she had forgotten Petunia was here.

"Obliviate. It's a spell that erases your memory." She doesn't bother waiting for Petunia's reaction, turning her attention back to Dumbledore. "You said I'm reluctant to being involved, right ? Well, this is me not getting involved. With any of it, actually. I don't want to remember the war, I don't want to remember how it ended, or why it started, I don't... I don't even want to remember your stupid school. I want to forget that magic exists."

A surprised gasp comes out of Petunia's mouth, and then the mask is back on, and she looks full of disdain once again. "I understand that. I always told Lily it was better to be normal than a freak."

Mary wants to tell her she's wrong. She wants to tell her that magic can be beautiful. But right now she doesn't remember why. Magic is beautiful when it's someone's magic, and everyone magical Mary loved is dead.

For Lily's sake, for all the times Mary held her while she cried missing her sister, she wants to tell Petunia she's wrong. That she loves being a witch. But she's so tired. And right now, she really doesn't.

She wishes she had someone on her side, to argue with Petunia so she doesn't have to. To jump into the fight for her.

But isn't that what they did ? Jump into the fight for people like you ? And where did that get them ?

Absolutely fucking nowhere.

"How far back are we talking about ?" Dumbledore's voice snaps her back into reality. He's looking at her with piercing blue eyes. God how she hates him. But she's also relieved, like this man is finally gonna take away some of the pain he caused her.

"Everything. Just erase everything from when I was eleven years old."

"I would not recommend that. You would wake up with ten years of your life missing, and you would start asking questions. Trying to fill the gaps."

"Can't you..." She sighs. She's so fucking tired. And more than anything, she wants to go to sleep. Physically and metaphorically.

"Can't you leave some stuff then ? So I don't wonder and get nosy about my own life ?"

"One simple way to do that would be for you to extract your memories from your brain. That way we could choose which ones..."

"For you to have them ?" She cuts him sharply. "And keep them in little bottles and look through them whenever you like ?" She scoffs "That's not bloody likely. Aren't you supposed to be a good wizard ? Like, really talented ? Can't you manage to... I don't know, make your obliviate a little selective ?"

"I could leave some memories of school, the ones that don't imply magic, but it would be very blurry. You wouldn't have much. And I can't let you keep any memories that date from after school. That would leave too many blanks you would want to fill."

She sighs. Closes her eyes. Lets that sink in.

He's going to do it. He's actually going to do it. This is it. This is where her pain stops.

What a bastard though, she thinks with a chuckle. She opens her eyes.

"It's fine. Just... Imply that we fell out of touch after school. I have a lot of memories that don't include them. I'll be fine."

"Very well. Mrs Dursley, if you would like to step back."

And suddenly, she sees everything. Like she's going to die and her whole life flashes before her eyes. All her magical life, anyways. It's like her brain knows what to focus on, in a last desperate attempt to keep it.

She's going to forget Lily's wedding. She's going to forget Harry. She's going to forget Sirius' and Remus' flat. She's going to forget Marlene's 19th birthday party. She's going to forget the trip they all made to France.

She's going to forget about Quidditch. James flying on his broom, Marlene and Sirius throwing bludgers at each other, Lily cheering them on, Remus reading in the stands, Peter with a red and gold scarf and pink cheeks.

She's going to forget how it feels to fly.

She's going to forget about potions. Lily giggling when they made Amortentia. Marlene mortified when hers smelled like Dorcas, Sirius and Remus thinking theirs didn't work because they were brewing it together.

The classes. The spells. Peter's magical chessboard, the owls, running in the Forbidden Forest, enchanting objects so they would dance, getting back at the boys and pranking them, getting drunk with Firewhiskey in the Leaky Cauldron, ...

She's going to forget Hogsmeade.

Trying to do magical make up. Sirius' magical moon phase tattoo. The first time she saw a unicorn. James' elf Minnie. The magical fireworks on New Year's Eve.

She's going to forget how it feels to cast a Patronus.

All there, in a second, she sees Lily smiling and Marls dancing and Remus...

"Obliviate"

When she comes home from university, she finds pictures of her school friends on the floor. She doesn't remember taking them out of the boxes, but she's feeling a bit light headed and really, really tired, so that must be it.

She picks up a picture of her and the girls. God, she hasn't seen them in ages. She smiles. She wonders what they're up to now. Mentally tells herself off for not having made the effort to stay in touch. It wouldn't make much sense to seek them out now, four years later.

Isn't it crazy, how you can spend your entire time with people, live with them, and then... They all went to different universities and fell out of touch, or at least that's what she assumes because right now she can't remember discussing their future, or what Lily wanted to study.

Oh well. She's ready to bet one day she'll turn on the sports channel and see Marls on TV, though she can't remember which sport it was she was really into. Or she'll stumble across a book written by Remus at the library, though she thinks she would remember if he had gone on to study Literature just like she did ?

"I really need to sleep" she mumbles to herself.

She picks up the photos, puts them back in their box, and goes to bed.

[maxdibert]

Hello, I've been following you for some time and I love your posts and analyzes about Severus, I regularly update your blog hoping for more and I always wanted to send you something, but I never had the opportunity.

But recently I saw a video on TikTok, which I didn't pay much attention to, but I saw the comments and one of them talked about how if Harry was a woman and looked like Lily, Severus would be a pedophile and that that gave people the creeps. And I, personally, find this statement very funny, because as far as I remember, Snape never had inappropriate contact with any Hogwarts student, or with anyone, in fact. But people intentionally forget that the only person who had the opening to do this was Peter Pettigrew. Ron himself said that they slept together and, probably, Peter saw the boys, literal children, changing their clothes, but, obviously, it would be Snape who was the child predator.

Sorry if it wasn't very understandable, English isn't my first language and I'm using Google to help.

Hi! Thank you. I'm glad you like my rants and sometimes nonense lol

About your pint... Well, this is a very old story. If I had a penny for every time I’ve read someone spouting this nonsense, I wouldn’t be rich, but I’d have enough for a nice dinner at a fancy restaurant. It’s so absurd that I don’t even think it’s worth refuting, but just to clarify a few things:

Severus resents Harry for two main reasons, and neither of them has to do with being in love with Lily. It’s not something as childish as “uh, my crush married someone else.” No, there are several layers to it.

The first and most obvious is that, unfortunately, Harry is the spitting image of his father, who, unfortunately, was a jerk who spent his school years torturing people—specifically, and with great enthusiasm: Severus Snape. James spent seven years hunting him down and attacking him for sport, backed by his loyal ally Sirius Black and supported by his lackeys, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew. While the latter two might not have physically assaulted Severus, they were there as enablers and complicit bystanders. Four against one, at the end of the day.

Severus never had the chance to heal from that abuse because, at 21, he was forced to return to the very place that had been hell for him. He had to teach students who were likely old enough to have witnessed some of those humiliations during his time as a student. A victim cannot heal in the place where they were consistently harmed.

Then Harry comes along, looking like an exact replica of James, and every time Severus sees him, it triggers him immensely. When he looks at Harry, he doesn’t see Lily’s son, nor does he see a child—he sees his abuser. And we all know Harry isn’t to blame for any of this, but the thing is, we can’t expect someone who isn’t acting rationally to be rational. Especially when we’re talking about someone who desperately needs therapy and probably medication, neither of which he’s ever had access to.

Then there’s another factor—a deeply emotional one—which is that Harry’s very existence is a painful reminder of Severus’s own role in Lily’s death. The fact that this kid is there, an orphan, is a constant reminder that Severus overheard a prophecy, reported it to Voldemort, and that Voldemort then chose to kill the most important person in Severus’s life because of it. It’s a perpetual mix of anger and guilt.

Looking at Harry forces Severus to relive his past as a victim, his most humiliating moments, as well as the terrible decisions he made because of them and their devastating consequences. This doesn’t excuse his behavior, but it does explain it quite well.

What I’m trying to say is that the reasons behind how he treats Harry are deeply tied to trauma. If Harry were a girl and resembled Lily, Severus would still feel deeply triggered every time he saw her. The only difference would be that instead of seeing James in her, he’d see Lily. I think, rather than anger, it would fill him with depression and guilt to such a degree that, instead of antagonizing her, he’d try to avoid her as much as possible. He wouldn’t want to get within ten miles of her because seeing her face would constantly remind him of the person he failed and indirectly condemned.

At no point do I imagine anything even remotely sexual crossing his mind. Especially when you consider that Severus never once confessed his feelings to Lily or behaved inappropriately toward her. I do think he’d act “softer,” but not because of her appearance specifically—more because Severus is always gentler toward women. I mentioned this in another post, but his more cordial relationships are almost always with female characters, and when he’s cruel, it’s typically far worse with men than with women.

People who lack even the most basic comprehension or analytical skills… Honestly, if they’re going to hate on him, the least they could do is come up with more convincing arguments. Sometimes it’s just exhausting to explain why their theories don’t make any sense.