#that people would feel that way about me. i really am so imperfect.

[orcelito]

Great thing about my new girlfriend is that we r both autistic so we are all 🤝 about being socially awkward. Another great thing about her is that we r both trans (t4t relationships ❤️). Another great thing about my new girlfriend is that she is 6'2" and I am 5'3" so I have a girlfriend that is literally 11 inches taller than me. And what a time it has been.

[novantinuum]

self care is unfollowing people who spread negativity on ur dash!! like Damn! yeah i theoretically Agree with your crit but i really Don't wanna see it either bc i want to Celebrate content instead of hyperfixating on the stuff i didn't like about it! yeet!!!

[bumblebeesfromvenus]

hiiii friend!! I just recently discovered your writing and I am l o v i n g it. If it's not too much to ask, can I request some comfort with soap for a fem!plus size! reader. Maybe reader has really bad anxiety about every day things, or is insecure about her looks? really anything works for me, I'm not picky. Thank you!!

Hello! 🩷

so sorry for the long wait, but I hope this helps you and any other girl who might feel bad about her extra pudge <3

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall 🪞

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Johnny comes to find you upset about your looks. Lucky for you, he always has a way to cheer you up.

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A downtrodden sigh slipped past your lips, your brows scrunched together as you were staring at yourself in the mirror.

Your day was doomed from the start; the second you caught an unflattering glance of your sleepy reflection, the corners of your mouth turned down into a frown, you knew today was only going to get worse.

No matter where you went, there always seemed to be a mirror situated somewhere, only reflecting the worst angles.

Whether it was a tinted window, the shiny surface of a cupboard, or the telly, the image of yourself followed you like a shadow. Your eyes always found the flaws first and overlooked all of your good qualities. Immediately drawn to any imperfections.

The extra fat that cushioned and softened your silhouette, the dimples on your legs, the rolls on your back that deepened when you twisted your body, your tummy that dented your clothes and rested on your thighs when you sat down.

Despite loving and accepting all of these parts of yourself, sometimes a parasite of insecurity and doubt planted itself in your mind for a day. It would eat away at your brain, sending you down a dizzying spiral.

With a huff you grabbed a blanket and threw it over the mirror, successfully covering up the smooth glass.

A much wiser decision than shattering it and living with even more reflections of yourself and bad luck for the next seven years.

You slipped into bed, burying deep into the blankets and pillows, hoping to soothe the heavy ache in your chest. Maybe sleeping would help, you thought.

Yes, maybe it would. At the very least, if would stop any more thoughts, and even if it was only for a moment, you wouldn't have to feel anything at all.

.·:*¨༺ ༻¨*:·.

The door fell shut with a thump, followed by a relieved sigh slipping past Johnny's slips as he toed off his boots. The weight off another day at Base lay heavy on his shoulders. At least he wasn't in an active warzone for once.

He dropped everything by the entrance, not caring enough to properly put his shoes away. All he wanted now was to find his soft bonnie lass and let the outside melt away.

Johnny wasn't surprised to not find you in the living room as he stepped further into your shared home. It wasn't uncommon for you to be taking a nap at this hour, but the way absolutely nothing in the house seemed disturb made him raise a brow.

With quiet steps, he made his way to your bedroom and cracked open the door, peaking his head in. You weren't facing him, your form obscured by far too many blankets, at least for Johnny's liking.

Nonetheless, the sight made him crack a soft smile. This was his prove that all he had done and will do was worth it so people like you would be safe.

From the corner of his eye he caught the covered mirror and with a slightly twisting feeling in his stomach he sat down on the edge of the bed, denting the mattress.

"Mo leannan?" He called softly, placing a gentle hand somewhere on your cocooned self.

Your response of a soft grumble made him chuckle. You were obviously not ready to leave your cozy paradise, and he couldn't blame you.

Johnny slipped under the blanket(s) with you, the tension easing from his muscles. He could finally rest his weary bones.

He scooted closer, ignoring how he would be boiled alive under all these layers, and wrapped his arms around.

He was about to rest his hands on your soft tummy, his favorite place for them to be, but as if you were struck by lighting you gasped and tightly grasped his wrists, stopping him in his tracks.

You had never been more thankful to not be facing Johnny, your head hung low in shame.

His brows furrowed in worry, the uncomfortable feeling that sat in the pit of his stomach proving to be an instinct he hoped would be wrong.

"What's wrong? I ken somethin's off." He spoke softly, his faced nuzzled into your hair.

The grip on his wrists loosened and you tucked them back at his side.

Stubborn as ever, Johnny managed to grasp at your hips, needing his hands on you.

"This alright?" He mumbled, waiting for your approval before going any further.

You managed a small verbal confirmation and he immediately pulled you back against him.

"The mirror-" he began, stopping when you tensed beneath his touch.

"Bad day?" Johnny asked quietly, gently rubbing his hands over your hips.

You nodded, your hair moving while he was left staring at the back of your head.

"Hen, let me see tha' pretty face o' yours, will ya?" He promoted gently, teasingly poking a finger in your side.

Your shoulders sagged with a heavy sigh, but soon you were maneuvering yourself onto your other side. You were greeted by empathic eyes and a soft, lopsided smile from your lover, who promptly wrapped his arms around you fully, pulling you into his chest.

You relaxed in his embrace, your head resting right above his heart beat. You let your eyes fall shut for a moment, letting Johnny's warmth and comfort deep into your flesh.

"Whatever is goin' on in tha' clever wee head, it's all lies." He whispered, making you pull your face from his chest, looking up at him with your beautiful doe eyes.

"Ah love all o' you. Every imperfection. Every flaw. Every pound. Ya hear me?" He sounded almost scolding, rasing his brows at you.

It managed to pull a small giggle from your throat and a faintest hint of a smile.

"There she is." Johnny smirked, watching as you rolled your eyes at him. He cupped your face.

"Ah love these round cheeks. Ma wee chipmunk." He cooed, pressing sloppy, wet kisses all over your face.

You squealed, pushing against his chest to get him away from you.

"Ew, Johnny!" You laughed, his stubble scratching your skin.

"Does ma affection disgust you, bonnie?" He accused, grinning. You got a hold of his cheeks and looked at him with a smile.

"No, but... can we try a little less drool?" He winced, his lips forming a thin line.

"Ah'm afraid tha's not possible."

As you took a breath to reply, he surged forward and continued smothering you in sloppy kisses, moving to your neck.

You screeched and laughed, feeling the rumble of his own chuckle against your throat.

Johnny didn't let up, only stopping when you had tears in your eyes and gasping for air. He pulled back and dramatically wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

"All tha' kissin's making me tired." He yawned, stretching his shoulders.

"Time for ma favorite pillow." He grinned at you.

"What're you up to?" You asked suspiciously, squinting yout eyes at him.

With a cheeky smile he dove under the blanket, expertly lifting your shirt up at the same time before pressing his entire face into your bare tummy.

"Johnny!" You gasped, followed by a laugh.

His rough stubble was prickling your skin.

Right now, he was just and odd bulge denting the blanket. You lifted the layers and found him smiling up at you, contently resting on your pudgy belly.

"Best spot in the house." He sighed, intertwining your fingers. You chuckled, smiling down at him softly.

"Thank you." You said quietly, running your fingers through his mohawk.

"Anyhtin' for ma bonnie lass. Ah love you. Promise." He replied in a low timber, pressing a kiss beside your belly button.

"I love you, too, Sudsy."

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I hope you enjoyed 😚

Don't forget, you're beautiful just being yourself 🩷

More of Johnny and others -> 💫

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[mcrslover]

MCR quotes for anyone who needs them:

"Kids would say they were going to kill themselves then they heard our music... it's our mission"

- Mikey Way.

...

"Reasons why mcr is good for you

juradsleigh:

Feeling like a rad vampire? Listen to bullets

Feeling angry? Listen to 3 cheers

Feeling sad? Listen to black parade

Feeling colourful and happy? Listen to danger days

Feeling like breaking up your band? Listen to death never stop you"

...

"This is for every kid out there... That dyed their hair a fucked up colour and can't get a job. They got a tattoo on their neck like Frank, and can't get a job. That does this because they fuckin' love this. This song is for every kid in the audience- even if you don't have fucked up hair or tattoos-every kid on stage, this song's about us, this song's about you, it's called The Kids From Yesterday."

- Gerard Way.

...

"Stop covering your children's eyes.

Everything is fucked up and pretending it's not won't make it any better. I'm tired of people praying for a change when it's up to them to get off their asses and make a change."

- Frank Iero.

...

"I spent most of my time in the back of the class, just drawing. My goal was to not get noticed in school, because spent so long not being noticed anyway or being treated as if I were invisible that I started to like it.

I've learned that it's actually not very lonely... It's like, you have less friends but the friends you have count more. I met a lot of people that weren't outsiders, or they were very popular, and they have a lot of friends but I don't know if they're the kinds of friends you would call up at 3 am to help you out or talk about being depressed."

- Gerard Way.

...

"Promise me, when MCR's gone, you'll do what it takes to survive. You're strong enough to do it without us."

- Gerard Way.

...

"All your quirks and all your problems, even your depressions, and your failures that's.. that's what makes you, you."

- Gerard Way.

...

"If you or someone you know is severely depressed you need to fucking talk to someone! Your mom, someone in school, I don't give a fuck! Because suicide is fucking bullshit."

- Gerard Way.

...

"Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections."

- Gerard Way.

...

"Nothing is worth hurting yourself over, nothing is worth taking your life over"

- Gerard Way.

...

"If we never play another show again, just keep yourself alive."

- Gerard Way.

...

"We're outsiders, we're the kids who didn't get dates for the prom, we're the kids who were confused, who didn't fit in with the cliques, who weren't part of the in-crowd.

Growing up can be a very frightening and confusing time, and I think people look at us and see it's okay to be different. They see that there is a way other than what they're being offered. That you can stand out, that you can be creative, that you can be yourself."

- Gerard Way.

...

"gerard-hey:

I love MCR so much it's like they have a song for every situation. Feeling sad? Listen to The Lights Behind Your Eyes. Feeling frustrated? Listen to I'm Not Okay. Feeling Energetic? Listen to Na Na Na. Feeling like you wanna kick some ass? Listen to Destroya.

Feeling rebellious? Listen to Teenagers. Feel like you wanna break up your band? Listen to Fake Your Death."

...

"The difference we want to make is, number one, to let these kids know that they're not alone, that they're actually not that messed up, and that they can do whatever they want they can express themselves in any way they want without being persecuted or called a faggot or some kind of racist thing. Really just get people to get over their stuff so they can live."

- Gerard Way.

...

"Whatever happens to you, no matter what, l'm always fucking there for you... Don't forget that. I don't give a shit if your boyfriend dumps you. If your girlfriend dumps you. If you're working a shitty job or can't get through school. If you can't get through a fucking Harry Potter book, there's nothing worth dying over. There's nothing worth taking your life over. I will always fucking be there."

- Gerard Way.

...

"If you come to an MCR show, you're probably a little fucked up, and that's okay because we're just as fucked up as you. It's us against the world. And it's great because there's thousands of us in one place."

- Gerard Way.

...

"Someone doesn't like you? Fuck it.

Having a bad day? Fuck it. Didn't get that job, or that grade, or that promotion you wanted? Fuck it. Fighting with your lover? Fuck it. Feel fat today? Fuck it. Losing control of everything and everyone? Fuck it.

What matters now won't matter soon; the truly important thing is that you are alive, and that you have the capacity to do absolutely anything with this beautiful, crazy coincidence of being on this earth. Just stick your middle fingers in the air and think, 'Damn, I have it good."

- Gerard Way.

...

"You're going to come across a lot of shitty bands, and a lot of shitty people. And if anyone of those people call your names because of what you look like, or bedause they don't accept you for who you are. I want you to look right at that mother fucker, stick up your middle finger and scream

"FUCK YOU!!"

- Gerard Way.

...

"Real revenge is making something of yourself."

- Gerard Way.

❤️🖤❤️🖤

[kathaynesart]

I'm turning Future Leo years old tomorrow (39) so to celebrate I drew fLeo going through all the trials and tribulations I've been dealing with at this age. Also thought it'd be a fun opportunity to put him in some of my outfits. He understands my pain.  

TED talk about aging and fLeo below here.  Just my thoughts as I was drawing all this.

So 39.  Seems like a big number that I’m sure feels so far off to many of my followers.  I thought as much too.  The oddest thing is I never felt much different from who I am now to what I was like at 25.  But then I hang out with 20 something and realize: oh… there was a change.  But what?

I will say this. A lot of people have told me that your 30’s will be the best years of your life and honestly I would have to agree.  In my experience (as well as my friends) something happens to you in your 30′s.  A calmness takes over. Not in a bad sort of way, but in a way where you no longer have any F’s to give.  All those things that used to stress you out and work you up sort of fade into the background and you’re left with this immense sense of freedom.  You finally come into your own and enough people have come and gone from your life that you realize that you don’t have to strive to meet everyone expectations even the ones you once set for yourself.  Again I’m sure it’s a little different for everyone but this has been the overall experience of many I’ve spoken with.

Life is messy and as you age you get a better sense of what matters in the mess.  Because we have only have so much energy to give, 30 something’s have to focus their energy on what really matters.  It helps you hone in on the important things.  For many in my age bracket, that is child rearing.  For me, a single cartoon loving cat lady, it’s my personal projects and my self betterment.  No one option is right and there are many many more than the few I just mentioned. It’s just about finding those things that really matter to you, and letting go of what society told you should matter.  

I’ll be honest, I literally got into this fandom because of future Leo.  Not necessarily because I “kinnie” him but because it was so wonderful (if even for a few minutes) to see a character my age not treated as some sagely old dude or antagonist, but the actual hero with a whole batch of flaws yet somehow still cool.  You don’t get to see that much anymore in media geared towards younger audiences and the response to him from the fandom was so dang heart warming.

Middle aged characters can be cool, goofy, imperfect, and still be figuring their sh*t out.  I know I still am.  I thought by this age I’d have everything figured out. That was the point of growing old, right?  But you don’t.  You never do.  But you can learn to come to terms with that, and realize that the important thing is to just enjoy the ride the best way you can.  

Thanks for helping me on that journey.

[pandoa]

eyes of your beholder

rook reassures you that you are still the most beautiful thing he has ever seen, no matter what your insecurities are

rook hunt x gender neutral! reader

requested by @yvonne67~✰

“Rook… honest opinion…” your voice rang through the decently sized dorm room of a certain Pomefiore vice housewarden. With a hint of hesitation to your tone, you leaned your back against the young man’s pillows and bed as you turned to look at him from his spot seated in front of his desk.

“Do you think I’m… too loud whenever we’re together?” 

Rook, upon hearing the hesitance in your voice, immediately set down the pen and paper in his hands, giving you his full attention, “Hm? Whatever do you mean, mon amour?”

“You know… I am more on the rambunctious side when it comes to personality, and it doesn’t help that my image doesn’t really correlate much with the standards Pomefiore builds as a dorm. People talk, you know. I’m not oblivious to their stares and whispers… I’m also more average when it comes to my looks so…” your sentence trailed off as you avoided the way Rook had been looking at you at that moment. Almost as if he were studying you with each sentence you said.

“You’re beautiful through and through, (Y/n),” he answered back with a sure expression, “But… Why do you ask?”

“It’s nothing—”

“It is never nothing, (Y/n).” Rook took a small step towards you, gently grasping your hands as the emerald of his eyes bore into you as if he were gazing through a crystal window to your thoughts. He held your hands delicately, voice now soft and whispering, “Mon ange, please tell me what is going through that radiant mind of yours.”

At that, his words were enough to make you feel as if you were about to crumble. Crumble into a pathetic pile of dust, dirt, and envy which gnawed at your conscience as your true intentions shone past the defenses you placed moments before. Your defenses collapsed all at once with a single utterance from the man in front of you, and he could see you clearer than ever by now. The imperfections and clouded insecurities. The damaged self-confidence and unease. 

He knew what made your mind spiral and twist and turn. What caused that heavy pit in your stomach whenever you would catch yourself glancing at another student at Pomefiore, gaze lingering a little longer than what was socially acceptable as a mere accident. He knew… yet he still hoped that you would be the one who told him directly.

This man… is too observant for his own good, you thought to yourself as you noticed Rook beginning to gently rub his thumb over your hands in a comforting motion, sending a warm flutter through your senses at the reassuring action.

“I just… I was just wondering if there was something that—” you paused for a split second as you pieced together your thoughts prudently, “—That I could perhaps fix about myself. To meet the kind of standards you all set for both yourself and the people around you. Just to, you know, maybe fit the part as your significant other a little better. That’s all.”

“Fit the part?” Rook repeated in disbelief, “Mon ange, you have nothing you need to be proving to others in order for—”

You glanced back up at him with a firm disposition, your stance unwavering and disbelieving in his words, “But there is, Rook. There is.”

“I can assure you there is not,” Rook smiled with a gentle curve to his lips as he took your hands he’d already been holding and guided you off of the sinking mattress of his dorm room, leading you somewhere away from his bed. “Come with me.”

“Where?” you asked as you reluctantly sat up and practically let him pull you to your feet. You had no idea what the huntsman had planned for you this time, yet you still gave into his wishes as he supported your form once you stood up. Albeit, with at least half as much enthusiasm compared to him—but still.

“Just trust me,” Rook’s smile slowly formed into a grin as you both began walking across his dorm room. Passing by the wooden furniture of his desk beside his bed, treading through the soft texture of his white, polka-dotted rug, and past the neatly hung bows and arrows in his room, you and Rook made your way on your short journey and into the familiar doors of—

… The bathroom?

“Now, mon trésor, what do you see?” Rook asked as he guided your shoulders and had you face both of your reflections into the dorm’s gold-accented looking glass with Rook standing slightly behind you.

“The mirror,” you answered back dryly.

“Be serious.”

A sigh escaped your mouth at his insistence for an answer, “Myself…”

“C’est exact! It’s you,” the hunter grinned as he gave you a small applause, glancing at you through the mirror, “And what else do you see in the mirror?”

“I see you.”

“Correct again. I see you, and you see me. A beautiful exchange, don’t you think?” “Rook, what’s the point in all of this—” You tried turning around to face the young man, only for him to promptly grasp your shoulders again and turn your frame to face the looking glass once more.

“And like this beautiful exchange, because you, mon ange, are my beloved partner and lover, we get to see, discover, and adore the things that make us the individuals we are today. To love someone is to see them…” Rook tenderly took hold of your hand again, reaching from his place behind you to grasp it as his voice was laced with an ardent urgency to tell you these words. His eyes bore into your heart as his ability to see things beyond the surface spoke to you in gentle touches and confessions of adoration. 

Then, after Rook had ensured that you were listening to every word, every syllable, and every consonant he uttered, he continued.

“...And I see you each and every second of the day, (Y/n). The world can say what it wants, your mind can continue feeding whatever worries which flood your mind so often, yet absolutely nothing will go so far as to blind me and prevent me from seeing the enchanting parts of you which I so adore.

There is nothing you need to do or change in order to be deserving of the love which I give to you freely. No superficial standard, no judgemental comment, no part you have to play… Nothing.”

“I only want you. Nothing else.” 

Rook finishes his passion-filled explanation, allowing more time for you to take in all that he said and let it imprint itself into both your mind and heart. You watched as Rook’s reflection in the mirror had diverted his gaze from the looking glass and onto you, seeing through you again and again in ways you could not even comprehend. It was almost unfair how he was able to reach you in the deepest depths of your mind. Never giving up on you whenever these waves and storms of emotions struck you. It was almost unfair how he pulled you out of these storms each time, piecing you back together like a beautifully broken piece of artwork.

“Now, if that fact alone still does not satisfy you,” the huntsman then continued as his voice held a much more lighthearted tone to it, “then I will gladly go through every detail about you which I oh so adore, as I have previously mentioned. And once I name each and everything, I will then give an even more detailed reasoning for why I love those parts of you, starting with your eyes, lips, face, nose, cheeks—”

You shook your head hastily, not wanting for him to over do his affirmations, “No, Rook, that isn’t very necess—”

“—eyebrows, eyelashes, waist, legs, voice—”

“Rook, wait—”

“—the little beauty marks and stray marks which decorate your skin, your scars, your hair no matter where it is—” He powered on despite your objections.

“It’s okay, really—”

“—the way your lips shift into a certain expression when you’re thinking, the way your arms never fail to bend at a one hundred thirty-seven degree angle every single time you pull me into one of your spell-binging embraces, the way you—”

Oh, Sevens. You have the dear hunter going off on a tangent now.

a/n: i really pulled out a protractor to try and measure the exact angle my arm would bend hugging a hypothetical rook hunt

[trippinsorrows]

ltye + 𝑓𝑎𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 oneshot

authors note: the wonderful @callmekayd asked about roman's conversation with fetu where he called solana his light, so i figured, why not write it?

only gonna tag a couple of people, cause i'll link this with the next update.

gif belongs to @romanreigns

words: 2.3k

warnings: some angst, discussion of solana's trauma

“You’re quiet, tonight.”

Roman looks over from the bottle of corona he was spinning in a circle on the wooden dining room table. “Am I?”

Fetu chuckles, snatching the bottle from him. “Smartass.” She pops off the cap and takes a swig, Roman sitting up in the chair.

“Should you be drinking that with your medications?”

“Probably not.” She answers so casually, so nonchalantly. It makes him sigh. This is what Ava was talking about. “But, I’m old, so I do what I want. Now stop trying to change the subject.” Placing the cap back on the drink she’s now commandeered as her own, she asks again in a more serious tone. “What’s going on, atalii o le uso?”

That’s such a loaded question, so much so that he’s not sure where to start. “Solana….”

“Your wife, right?” He nods, eyes glancing to the phone that’s screen up on the table. She hasn’t text him in a couple hours, which could either be a good or bad thing. He’s not sure. “How is that going? I know you weren’t very happy about it the last time I saw you.”

Roman is the one to chuckle. It’s almost unreal how much his tune has changed since his last visit with his aunt where he essentially expressed both disinterest and acceptance with the arrangement. 

“Yes, it’s about her, but….not in the way you think.”

When he doesn’t say anything, Fetu impatiently implores, “well, would you hurry up, boy? I may be old, but I still need my beauty sleep.”

Rolling his eyes, Roman shakes his head, growing quiet, muddled thoughts floating into something less disorganized and more cohesive. “She’’s—she’s not what I thought she would be.” 

At that, Fetu asks, “Oh?” She offers a warm smile. “Tell me.” 

Another loaded request he’s not sure how to handle. Roman swallows. “She’s…..kind.”

Fetu snorts, again grabbing the beer he really should try to take from her and would if not for the fact she’d probably bust it over his head in the process. “Well, they say opposites attract.” Roman rolls his eyes. Granted, she’s not entirely wrong, hence why he offers no disagreement. “What else?”

Leaning back in the chair, Roman tries to think of the best way to describe her. To describe the last person on earth he ever expected to care about but has done just that. “I’ve…..I’ve never met anyone like her. She has a big heart, and she’s so innocent. Despite being raised in this life, surviving hell, she still….she still has this softness about her.”

Fetu hums, reminding him, “not everyone in this world is cruel and unkind, Roman. There are very much good people, and it sounds like you’ve maybe been lucky enough to land one of them as a partner.”

He nods, quietly admitting. “I have.”  Roman traces his finger over the imperfections of the wooden table. “But, she’s had a lot of trauma. It’s been….not the easiest to get to where we are.” He takes a deep breath, disclosing, “we haven’t even consummated the marriage yet.”

Fetu’s eyes widen a bit as she asks, truly out of genuine curiosity, “wasn’t that the point of the marriage? To create an heir?”

“She was gang raped as a child,” Roman informs in a low voice, only feeling comfortable sharing such sensitive information because he knows it will never leave this room. “So touch is….it’s hard for her. She asked to work up to intimacy, so we’re trying that.”

“Oh, that poor child.” Fetu’s expression is visibly disturbed and saddened. “Sick fucks.” Roman doesn’t say anything, but the murderous urges boiling underneath are something he has to push back down. In due time. “Wait. Don’t take this as me agreeing with that bullshit requirement, but if she wasn’t a virgin, how did the Elders approve of the marriage? It obviously wasn’t her fault, but we both know how they are. Traditionalist pricks.”

If not for the nature of the conversation, Roman would laugh. “Her father had the doctor lie on her medical report. It stated she was still a virgin.” Roman feels the need almost to defend, “wouldn’t have made a difference to me either way. You know this.”

“It better not. I didn’t raise you to be a hypocrite.” Fair. “Wait, her father did that?”

That actually makes Roman chuckle, but there’s no humor whatsoever. “That’s why I’m here.” Hand naturally forming into a fist, he continues to share information he would never share with anyone else. “Her mother was stabbed to death when she was ten. Solana was there and stabbed too, but she survived.” His jaw clenches. “Her father and brother are both pieces of shit who used to abuse and torture her.”

Fetu is visibly perturbed by the heavy details. “My God, that girl has been through hell.”

“I know.” It doesn’t make sense to Roman how with everything she’s experienced, she still stands, still keeps going, keeps fighting. “But, she’s made tremendous progress since leaving her family. I made her start training, and I think it’s helped a lot. She’s made good friends with Naomi and her friend Bayley. Solana is half Mexican, and Bayley is Mexican, so they seem to bond a lot over that.” And he's happy she has that. Glad she has people she can talk to and connect with. “She’s……happy now.”

Better.

Much better.

Fetu tilts her head to the side. “Something tells me there’s a but.”

There is. A major one. Roman releasing a heavy sigh and running his hand over his face. “I found out her father was behind the hit that killed her mother and was intended to kill Solana too, but she survived. And when he couldn’t afford to pay off the balance, he sold Solana’s virginity and had it set up like a home invasion.”

Fetu says something in Samoan, her own expression slipping into something angry. “What a fucking piece of shit. His own wife? His child?” She asks, an almost demanding element to her question. “You’re going to kill him, right?” Like it’s less of a request and more of an order.

“Of course.” That’s a no brainer. Roman’s new number one mission in this life is to see Xavier, his bitch ass son, and Solana’s rapists meet gruesome, painful deaths. And he’ll be sure to see it through. “But, I don’t—I don’t know if I should tell her. “ He quickly adds, “but, I don’t want to lie to her either. I promised her I’d never do that.”

Fetu nods, her lips pressed together in a sort of frown. “I see…..”

“I don’t want to hurt her,” he admits in a low voice. “I don’t—I can’t see her hurt.”

“Roman….” Fetu’s voice takes on that gentle tone that’s always been comforting to Roman. That, for a long time, before Solana, was the only source of comfort he truly could find in this life. “It’s obvious you lo—care for this girl.” She catches herself. In his own timing. “But, the truth is, there is no way around her being hurt by this.” Roman looks away, jaw clenched, clearly not wanting or liking what he’s hearing. As expected. “She’s going to be devastated. As would anyone to find out their own flesh and blood, let alone a parent, could be so evil.”

“She’s tried to kill herself when she was younger.” Recalling this specific piece is by far the hardest part. Just thinking about the medical report he read detailing the emotional aftermath Solana’s attempt. How distraught she was. “I just—I just don’t want to be the cause that pushes her over the edge.”

Fetu reaches over the table, placing her hand on top of his. “It wouldn’t be because of you.”

He shakes his head. “Yes, it would. Either because of what I tell her or I don’t tell her, and she finds out some other sort of way.”

“Is there a way she could find out?”

Roman has to think about it. One of the first things he did was cut off contact between Solana and her family. For the mere fact he knows Xavier is up to something, wants something out of Roman’s marriage to Solana. Roman knew that he would try to use her, and just from what he saw at the outset of this whole thing, he knew the last thing she needed was to be dragged into some type of wicked plan.

Xavier has no way to contact her, and he’s not stupid enough to show up or send his dumbass son to her job. 

He knows it’d be walking into a deathtrap. So, no, it seems like there’s no chance for this information to ever get out and arrive at Solana’s doorstep. 

But……there’s still a chance.

“I don’t know,” is the answer Roman settles on. ‘But, I can’t—I won’t do anything I think could hurt her, and this…..this will do more than hurt her.”

It could destroy her. Destroy all the progress she’s made. Regress her so far back that he’s not sure she’d be able to recover. 

And he can’t have that. 

“I think she deserves to know the truth. It was her mother. Her assault. She has a right to know.” Roman doesn’t disagree with that. “But, I’m also thinking about everything you’ve told me regarding her mental health, and I guess my concern is what that truth could do to her. If she could handle it.”

And that’s exactly what his fear is.

Roman’s voice is full of vulnerability that he could never show outside of this safe space. “I don’t think I could handle seeing her the way she used to be. I—I care about her too much to do that to her.”

“I understand.” Because she does. Oh, she does. And if not for the heavy nature of this conversation, she’d be more expressive at the joy bubbling beneath the surface. Her elation at finally having years worth of prayers answered. At having comfort in knowing her sweet boy has finally found his person. His soulmate. “Your intentions are good, Roman, and I can’t tell you what to do, though something tells me that’s what you’d prefer.”

He scoffs, shaking his head and admitting, “I just needed to talk to someone.”

That much was obvious. She continues, advising, “what I can tell you is to just continue to support and be there for her, because when she does find out, whether from you or some other means, she’s going to need you, son.”

Roman doesn’t say anything, sitting on his aunt’s wisdom. She’s right. This truly is the depiction of being stuck between a rock and a hard place, but for the sake of Solana’s mental health, it’s not in her best interest to know the truth.

He’ll tell her.

But only when the time is right. 

Fetu, however, has a question of her own. “I want to ask you something, and I want you to be honest with me.”

Roman sits up and sighs, “I’m always honest with you, uso o le tinā.”

“Because you know, even with how big and strong you’ve gotten, I’ll still whoop your ass, little boy.” She’s pleased to see the small smile that accompanies his eye roll, a brief glimpse of that young child she once knew so long ago appearing for the first time in a long time. And she’s pretty sure she can bet just what’s brought that dormant side out of him.

Or who.

Her voice is gentle. “If you knew then what you know now about Solana, would you have still agreed to marry her?”

It’s a valid question. 

It’s also something he doesn’t have to think about. 

“Yes.” Fetu smiles. Knowing. Confirmation. “I wouldn’t change anything.” It’s the easiest thing his aunt could ever ask him. It requires no thought. No contemplation. Just an automatic response. “Solana is…..she’s my light.”

Her heart swells, and she finds herself with unshed tears. There’s this invisible weight that’s suddenly lifted off her soul. A worry that’s been destroyed by one woman. One strong woman who’s managed to capture the heart of her sweet boy.

Even if he hasn’t realized it just yet.

“Well, she’s obviously a strong woman to survive all she has, and she must be to deal with you.” She flicks his hand, pulling back and asking, “let me see a picture of her.”

Roman grabs his phone, unlocking it and opening his photos album. Hitting the favorites folder, he selects one of the photos taken of Solana the night she went out with Bayley and Naomi for Cinco de Mayo.

Reaching the phone to his aunt, he watches her slide her glasses over her eyes, mouth ajar just a bit. “Oh my goodness, she’s beautiful! Too pretty for you.” Roman smiles. “You know if my tits still sat nice like that, I’d wear stuff like that too.”

And just like that, a scowl is on Roman’s face. That was the last visual he needed. Ever. 

Taking his phone, Fetu implores, “I want to meet her, Roman.” He stills, hitting the lock button after checking for any texts from Solana. “It’s bad enough I can’t have gentleman callers or anyone else come see me. The least I can do is meet your wife.” It’s a fair request, though something he’s unsure about. “I’m tired of seeing your big ears and Ava’s massive forehead all the time. Bring Solana here.”

This request, however, is not the easiest thing. He doesn’t have an answer for her right now. “I’ll think about it.”

“Well, don’t take too long,” she warns. “I’m not getting any younger.”

Roman tenses at that. He hates when she jokes like that. 

He stands up, walking over and kneeling in front of her. “Thank you.”

Fetu smiles warmly, reaching over to kiss his forehead. “Ou te alofa ia te oe”.

He doesn’t hesitate to reciprocate. “Oute alofa fo'i ia oe” 

-------

Translations: 

"atalii o le uso" = nephew

"uso o le tinā" = aunt

“Ou te alofa ia te oe”. = I love you.

“Oute alofa fo'i ia oe” = I love you too.

[adiraargent]

You drew stars around my scars - Slytherin Boys

summary: Slytherin boys (Taylor's Version) x Reader warnings: mentions of scars (not specified what from), swearing, smoking includes: Theodore Nott, Mattheo Riddle, Jasper Rowle, Draco Malfoy and Tom Riddle - I will do a part 2 with other characters if anybody wants one :) wc: 2373 Part 2

Theodore Nott - Cardigan

Theodore Nott sat beside you on the edge of the bed, his gaze tender as he studied the scars that adorned your skin. You could feel his fingers tracing gentle patterns along the lines of your past, his touch feather-light as he navigated the landscape of your history.

As you looked up at him, a warmth swelled in your chest, but you couldn't help but worry. Worry that he was just use you, use you like others had done in the past. Tossing you away when they were done with you.

And when I felt like I was an old cardigan under someone's bed, you put me on and said I was your favorite

"Thank's for sticking around Theo," you murmerd softly, your cheeks flushing a pretty pink tone.

He looked up at you then, his eyes filled with an intensity that took your breath away. "You are my favorite person in this shitty world," he murmured, his voice soft like the rustle of leaves in the wind, despite the crude words. "Every scar, every imperfection, only serves to make you more beautiful in my eyes."

His words washed over you like a soothing balm, calming the storm of insecurities that raged within your soul. With Theodore by your side, you felt safe, protected from the harsh judgments of the world by the warmth of his love.

And when you are young, they assume you know nothing

People had always judged you for something, it was a judgemental world that you lived in. Maybe someone judged you for your skin, or your scars... or maybe just the way that you wore your hair. Maybe it was your weight or your height. Nobody was perfect... thought Theodore Nott would beg to differ, in his eyes you were the embodiment of perfection.

And of course, people judged you for being with Theodore Nott, a Slytherin boy with a troubled past. One that liked to smoke and drink, that liked to get into fights and argue with teachers and students alike. But you were in love. 'Love?' they'd ask you and laugh. 'You're so young, what the hell would you know about love?'

But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss

Theodore's fingers stilled against your skin, his eyes searching yours with a depth of understanding that left you breathless. "I may not have all the answers," he said softly, "but I promise to stand by your side through every uncertainty, to hold you close and chase away the shadows of doubt that threaten to consume you."

And as he leaned in to press a gentle kiss against each scar, his lips a tender caress against your skin, you felt a sense of peace settle over you like a warm embrace. With Theodore, you knew that you were never alone, that no matter what trials and tribulations lay ahead, you would face them together, hand in hand, heart in heart.

For in his touch, you found solace and strength, a reminder that love had the power to heal even the deepest wounds. And as he traced stars around your scars with his fingers, you knew that no matter how dark the night may seem, the light of his love would guide you safely home.

Okay but i'm really happy with this icl

Mattheo Riddle - Mine

And I remember that fight, 2:30 AM As everything was slipping right out of our hands

As the moon hung high in the sky, casting its silvery light over the darkened landscape, you quietly snuck out of your shared home , your heart heavy with doubt and fear. Tears streamed down your face unchecked as you clutched your suitcase tightly, the weight of your decision bearing down on you like a heavy burden.

You had always struggled with trust issues and abandonment fears, scars from a childhood marred by betrayal and heartache. And now, faced with the prospect of being completely in love with a boy who had been nothing but good to you, you couldn't help but feel overwhelmed by the magnitude of it all.

Mattheo Riddle, that cocky, short-tempered Slytherin, had become the center of your world, a beacon of light in the darkness that threatened to consume you. You got together in your second last year of school and were still together now a year after graduating. And yet, the thought of allowing yourself to fall completely and unconditionally in love with him terrified you to your core. You loved him, you knew that you did... but did love really exist? Falling in love was dangerous, it was setting yourself up to get your heart broken.

"I'll never leave you alone," his voice echoed in your mind, a soothing melody amidst the chaos of your thoughts. You had been sitting at the Black lake, the two of you had been together for 3 months and it was the first time you had told each other 'I love you'

But as much as you longed to believe his words, the scars of your past lingered like a shadow, a constant reminder of the pain and suffering you had endured. Even after all this time, you still had doubts. And so, with a heavy heart and tear-stained cheeks, you made the decision to leave, to distance yourself from the one person who had come to mean everything to you.

I ran out, crying, and you followed me out into the street Braced myself for the goodbye 'Cause that's all I've ever known

Bracing yourself for the goodbye, you took a hesitant step forward, the weight of your suitcase dragging behind you like an anchor. But before you could take another step, a voice called out to you from behind, stopping you dead in your tracks.

Turning around, you saw Mattheo running towards you, his eyes filled with an intensity that took your breath away. "I won't let you go," he said, his voice trembling with emotion. "I'll never leave you alone, I promise."

And in that moment, as he took you in his arms and held you close, you felt a sense of peace wash over you like a wave crashing against the shore. For in Mattheo's embrace, you found solace and strength, a reminder that love had the power to heal even the deepest wounds.

I fell in love with a careless man's careful daughter

"I promise I will do everything to prove I am nothing like he was," he whispered against your ear, his words a testament to the depth of his love and devotion. "You're the best thing that's ever been mine."

And as you looked into his eyes, filled with love and sincerity, you knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, you would face them together, hand in hand, heart in heart. For in Mattheo Riddle, you had found a love worth fighting for, a love that would stand the test of time.

Jasper Rowle

As you and Jasper Rwle walked hand in hand through the winding streets of Diagon Alley, a sense of contentment settled over you like a warm blanket on a cold winter's night. His hand in yours felt like home, grounding you in the present moment and reassuring you. You felt so safe with him, the way he softly rubbed your hand with his thumb sent warmth through your body, the heat being a stark contrast to the snow falling around you

"Can I go where you go?" you whispered, your voice barely above a hushed murmur as you gazed up at him with adoration shining in your eyes. You didn't mean to say it out loud. But you just wanted to be with him as much as possible, the way you felt when you were around him was unlike anything you had felt before.

You felt alive, wanted... loved.

Jasper's lips curved into a tender smile, his eyes sparkling with love and affection. "Forever and ever," he replied, his voice a soft melody in the air. "You and me, always."

And as you walked together, lost in the beauty of the moment, you couldn't help but feel a sense of gratitude wash over you like a wave crashing against the shore.

Take me out, and take me home

He brought your hand up to his lips, placing a soft kiss against your skin, "c'mon, lets get to the three broomsticks then I'll take you back, its not good for you to be out in the snow for too long, I don't want you to get sick.

You're my, my, my, my Lover.

"Okay my love," you replied with a smile, letting him pull you along in the direction of the pub.

Jasper's grip on your hand tightened, as though afraid to let go, as though afraid that this perfect moment would slip through his fingers like grains of sand. "You're so gorgous," he whispered, his voice filled with a tenderness that took your breath away. "i adore you."

And as you walked together, lost in the maze of streets and alleys, you knew that no matter where life may take you, you would always find your way back to each other.

Draco Malfoy - getaway car

No, nothin' good starts in a getaway car

The sun had dipped below the horizon, casting a golden hue over the sprawling grounds of Malfoy Manor as Draco Malfoy and you sat together on his expensive broomstick. It was a moment suspended in time, a brief respite from the chaos and turmoil of the world outside.

As you gazed out at the rolling hills before you, Draco's hand found yours, his touch gentle and reassuring. But beneath the facade of tranquility, there was an undercurrent of tension, a sense of unease that lingered in the air like a shadow.

It was the best of times, the worst of crimes

You knew Draco was a death eater now, knew he had done bad things and helped bad people but you couldn't bring yourself to leave him. You loved him, and whenever you thought about the bad things he had done, your heart was quick to remind you of all the good times you had together.

All the late night talks, the joking around, the kissing and holding... everything.

But as the miles stretched out before you, you couldn't help but wonder if it was worth it.

I wanted to leave him, I needed a reason "X" marks the spot where we fell apart He poisoned the well, I was lyin' to myself

You fought to held back tears, the two of you were now on the run and now because of him, you were leaving all your friends and family behind. You were a traitor now and it was all his fault.

Draco's grip tightened around the broom handle, his gaze distant as he stared out at the sky ahead. "I knew it from the start," he admitted, his voice tinged with sorrow. "We were cursed."

You were drivin' the getaway car We were flyin', but we'd never get far

You new the order would be after you soon, they knew what Draco had done. You wrapped your arms around him tighter, burying your head into his back as you held onto him, scared of falling.

Ridin' in a getaway car There were sirens in the beat of your heart

And as you flew on into the night, the sirens in the beat of your heart seemed to grow louder, a relentless reminder of the consequences of your actions. You should have known that you'd never leave, that the promise of freedom would come at a steep price, one that you weren't willing to pay if it meant leaving Draco.

So still, you clung to each other, two lost souls adrift in a sea of chaos and uncertainty. For in each other's arms, you found solace and strength, a beacon of hope in a world gone mad.

And as the stars twinkled overhead and the world blurred past, you knew that no matter where the road may lead, you'd never leave him

We were jet-set, Bonnie and Clyde (oh-oh)

Tom Riddle - right where you left me

Help, I'm still at the restaurant Still sitting in a corner I haunt Cross-legged in the dim light They say, "What a sad sight"

Under the soft glow of the restaurant lights, you found yourself seated alone at a corner table, the memories of your past love weighing heavily on your heart. Friends had come and gone, relationships had blossomed and withered away, but you remained rooted in the past, unable to move forward.

Your eyes kept flicking up to the empty chair in front of you, your plate of food going cold as it sat in front of you completely untouched. The workers looked over, eyes filling with sympathy and sadness at the all-familiar face they had seen too many times, brief flashes of the happy couple that had once sat there.

Everybody moved on I, I stayed there Dust collected on my pinned-up hair They expected me to find somewhere Some perspective, but I sat and stared

As you sat there, lost in your thoughts, the echoes of the past danced around you like ghosts in the night. You remembered the first time you had met, the way his smile had lit up the room and warmed your heart. But now, all that remained were distant memories, fragments of a love that had once been.

You couldn't help but wonder if he ever thought about you, if he ever regretted the choices he had made. Did he know that you were still waiting for him, still hoping for a second chance at love? Or had he moved on, leaving you behind like a forgotten relic of the past?

Right where you left me You left me no, oh, you left me no You left me no choice but to stay here forever You left me, you left me no, oh, you left me no You left me no choice but to stay here forever

The restaurant buzzed with life around you, the sounds of laughter and conversation blending together in a cacophony of noise. But amidst the chaos, you felt alone, a solitary figure adrift in a sea of strangers.

And as you sat there, watching the world pass you by, you couldn't help but feel a sense of longing wash over you like a wave crashing against the shore. You longed for the warmth of his embrace, the comfort of his presence, but you knew deep down that he was gone, lost to you forever.

Did you ever hear about the girl who got frozen? Time went on for everybody else, she won't know it

Yet, despite the ache in your heart and the tears in your eyes, you couldn't bring yourself to leave. You were stuck in the past, trapped in a cycle of longing and regret, unable to move forward without him by your side.

But as the night wore on and the restaurant began to empty out, you knew that you couldn't stay there forever. It was time to let go of the past and embrace the future, to find happiness within yourself and move on from the love that had once consumed you.

With a heavy heart and tear-stained cheeks, you rose from your seat and made your way towards the door. And as you stepped out into the cool night air, you made a silent vow to yourself to never look back, to keep moving forward no matter how difficult the journey may be.

If our love died young, I can't bear witness And it's been so long But if you ever think you got it wrong I'm right where you left me

But it was a vow you knew you'd break just for him.

written by @adiraargent

Please do not steal or post anywhere else <3

Requests are open!!!

Bye for now

[kingofthering]

september-october 2024

ao3

rosquez

Swing State by @tartquez + the rest of the Bicameral series

I know that everyone is probably already onto this but it obviously needs to make the list. Italian Political AU where every single character is so deliciously written, imperfect and fleshed out and so interesting.

road to ruin (we're starting at the end) series by @kingofthecotas

Always love an interesting concept of soulmate AU. Do want to know more.

choke the girl to get her by @le-chevalier-au-lion

😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 Hot shit, truly.

Headed Straight for the Concrete by @moonshynecybin

I mean. Do I even have to justify why I'm putting a Callie fic in here. The dialogue before even the physicality of it all. Ugh.

vr46 rosquez pack (other pairings included) by @sammyche

Excellent concept. Beautiful execution. Hot and also a little sweet.

In Tandem by @unluckynr13

A perfect use of that Yamaha and the image of them "working" it together? Yeah.

Don't go wasting your emotions (lay all your love on me) by CamilleDuDemon

Going to paste the comment I made on this fic because I think it summarizes my feeling well : "I loved this so much. I enjoyed your Valentino a lot, all of him and his defaults and the fuckery in his brain and how mostly aware of all that he was. You could really feel in the scenes with them at all times. Like, I haven’t had an alcohol blackout in so many years but it almost brought me right back. Loved the decision to have the after first and then the before. Perfect way to go in my mind. Might have to be thinking about the to of them on that couch (watching a movie that Marc knew Valentino enjoys) together for a while."

meaning upon motion by @le-chevalier-au-lion

Delightfully in love with the style of this. So many good things and feelings packed in not so many words. The way you could feel Valentino’s hesitancy at times and the way Marc was just trying to understand where this was going. So good.

others

patterns (pecco/vale) by @vanillow

I am a sucker for Vale/the Academy boys (in particular Pecco & Bezz) so this was such a treat.

romantic, dramatic + syphon (pecco/marc) by @vanillow

Vampire AU and blood drinking/vampire feeding, my most beloved.

shades of red series (pecco/marc) by @certainstarfishllama

Alpha Pecco & Omega Marc. Excellent in terms of characterization and the way they're trying to move around each other. Also hot.

Confidence Interval (pecco/luca) by Anonymous

Part of the Bicameral series so obviously I was going to enjoy it but oh boy. Such a good Pecco character study. And I love his relationship with Bezz as well, so much.

hands to yourself! (aleix/dovi) by @vanillow

You know how cool it is when a rare pair hits right? Perfect use of Aleix's natural ability to push people around and make them uncomfortable and make them enjoy it.

warm me up (cele/pecco) by @vanillow

I think they're like my favorite guilty pleasure pair except there is nothing guilty about it, if that makes sense.

tumblr

rosquez

vale & dovi both showing up at marc's door by @matchvedev

cruelty looks good on valentino by @vanillow

dancing in the club by @lastlatebraker

free use by @yekoc

because I know you by @vanillow

others

vale/dovi thing by @lastlatebraker

post aragon 2024 marcnaia by @faster-faster-aster

santi/vale by @lestelledreams

jorge/aleix fridge video by @theboschvroom

open secret dovquez by @lastlatebraker

“What would you do if I turned into a worm?” bezzetti by @highestside

hockey au pedreix by @vanillow

omega au pecco/bezz by @unholytrifecta

free use pecco/bezz/vale by @vanillow

[respectthepetty]

Your post about being happy that there are so many queer media to watch nowadays, even the bad ones is just spot on. I live in a homophobic country and I'm still in the closet at 25. so imagine growing up, discovering yourself, being so afraid and then have all the queer content you find end with the characters dying, being laughed at, or reduced to harmful stereotypes. because what did that mean for silly young closeted me?

But now?

Now I'm thriving, i get to experience queer love, queer joy, even queer dumbassery lmao. These reminders, despite still feeling stuck, constantly show me how other queer people are moving forward and living their lives—and it's beautiful, even the trashy ones (which always are the most fun to watch)

So thank you for your post. It’s a reminder that our stories matter, no matter how imperfect!

Anon, although I live in the United States, I have always lived in a super conservative county where the town clerk refuses to issue marriage licenses to queer couples (and sometimes people of color depending on the day). We have billboards coming into town telling everyone they are going to hell and compared to all my friends in bigger cities who had to wait for the COVID vaccine, I got mine in 2020 when they were mostly only available to medical staff because the medical staff at our hospital refused to get it because Trump told them not to or some shit, so the local pharmacy begged anyone to get the shot before they expired. For a long time, my town refused to let cable or internet companies come in because then we would be exposed to sinful media.

But I ain't moving!

So although I haven't lived your experience, I feel ya.

Which is why I love all the discourse about QLs. If someone loves a show, I want to see why. If someone hates a show, I want to hear all about it. Because for so long, I had NOTHING! I was looking at the bible in Catholic school like . . . "Judas, you could've just told Jesus you wanted him instead of doing all this" *sign of the cross* and we all know how that ended for both of them.

Now, I'm trying to figure out where to find the time to watch all that is being offered to me! I can be picky now! I can dislike a show without feeling like ALL queer content will be taken away from me. I can get characters giving hand jobs, rim jobs, and blow jobs without having to pay-for-view at 1 am praying that the volume stays low.

I have watched some of the worst imaginable queer content, and I have watched queer porn with a plot which has smacked, and not just literally *wink*. I have watched so many queers be buried in ways that people cannot even begin to fathom. I have seen more than my fair share of queer media, and I can say without a doubt that these BLs are giving us some of the best variety of queers I have ever seen, and regardless if they are true to the queer experience (Dinosaur Love, I'm looking at your wild ass), two men holding hands is really fucking queer to these homophobes regardless of the plot. Two men cuddling in bed is super queer to these homophobes regardless of how aligned it is with the queer experience. Two women kissing is giving a homophobe a heart attack right now!

Century of Love had homophobic crew members. Those people got a paycheck for filming a BL while tweeting homophobic comments. Homophobia doesn't magically go away because we have queer content, which is a truth you and I know, but it gives me tiny pleasure knowing that 1) the show is airing on a popular-ish Thai channel in a prime-time slot, and 2) homophobes had to film two men kissing, multiple times. If we can't beat (the fuck out of) them, at least we made them feel super uncomfortable for even a teeny tiny bit.

And that's the other half of this - Not only do we get to consume all of this, but others are being exposed to it. These shows are airing in their countries ON TV. These actors are being shown in ads on TV and doing spreads for magazines. So while my town has billboards telling us to seek Jesus or perish in the fires of hell, Apo and Mile are eating Lay's on a billboard somewhere in Thailand.

Because this isn't just about the queers watching but about the homophobes and even the in-betweens witnessing it.

Give me all the trashy series (Dinosaur Love, still looking at you)! Give me the series that have absolutely no plot except two boys holding hands. GIVE ME EVERYTHING! Because no matter what I get, I guarantee it is pissing off some grandpappy somewhere, and that's really the queer experience; pissing people off for not only existing, but having the audacity to thrive despite it all.

So thrive, QL Land, THRIVE!

[rosiestalez]

Do You Believe in Fate?

Remy LeBeau(Gambit) x M!reader

wc: 790

Summary: A young man takes a visit to an art exhibition not expecting to run into someone who he may never see again!

A/N: Hello, hello! i’m so sorry that this took so long, and i’m so sorry about how short it is. I am obsessed with the meet cute trope right now so that’s what you’re getting… i mean it (i’m sorry i’m being sarcastic)! I’m still trying to work on formatting and aesthetic of my page so thank you for your patience! Also, this is my last Gambit post until further notice! i’m still taking requests, but there’s already five and i want to work on our other faves!

Request by: @gambitsversion

Warnings: language, alcohol, meet cute!!

——————————————————————

Jazz music hummed, and the smell of Beignets, liquor, and smoke filled the air of New Orleans. Y/n makes his way into an art gallery nestled in between two historic buildings, the heat and humidity being left far behind. His eyes gazes upon the room, it’s small, but all the art was large and filled with personality he smiles looking at the beautiful art.

He begins to wander the exhibit taking in each art piece. His eyes lands on a large painting, it’s abstract. He looks at every purple, black, electric detail; he reads the pamphlet, but can’t seem to find the artist of this piece.

“It’s pretty, ain’t it?”, a voice speaks behind him.

Y/n turns his gaze from the painting meeting a pair of oddly black and red eyes. He’s smirking his back is up against the wall, nonchalant and confident. He’s brown leather coat draped over his broad shoulders, and his auburn hair put up, is slightly hued purple from the light in the room.

“I guess so”, he states curiously studying the man, “i’m not really into this.”

The man removed himself from the wall raising an eyebrow, “No? you don’t like it?”

He shrugs, “it feels a bit…chaotic, i don’t really get it.”

“Ah, i see”, he chuckles, “mon ami, sometimes chaos is the meaning”, he smiles.

“Yeah, i guess so”, he smiles back, “and do you happen to be the artist of this chaotic masterpiece?”, pointing his thumb behind him.

“Nah”, he shakes his head, “da name’s Remy, Remy LeBeau, but da people call me da Gambit”, he picks up a glass off a tray, “i like good art and liquor.”

He extends his hand to shake, “y/n”, he says; Remy shakes his hand with a firm grip. Remy smiles and my gosh it’s intoxicating, y/n can’t help, but blush.

“what brings ya over here?”, Remy asks taking a sip of his drink.

“I needed to get away.”

“Away from what?”

“y’know…life?”, he chuckles.

“Why NOLA then? You know it ain no escape”, Remy questions.

“It’s beautiful”, y/n smiles.

“Well, you’s a brave one for comin out here during hurricane season.”

Y/n’s heart flutters, his freckled cheeks growing warm as the conversation continues, “Are you from here?”

“Born and raised, cher”, he smiles.

“Well then I may need a tour guide tomorrow”, y/n bashfully smiles.

“Maybe cher, do ya believe in fate?”, Remy took a couple steps closer to Y/n. The world around him seems to slow down, his breath hitches at the realization of the lack of space.

He clears his throat, “never really thought of it”, his temperature rising, his heart is pounding, yet his thoughts are slow and steady.

“Damn, mon cher, i thought fate was the reason you were here in front of me right now”, he smirks. His eyes lingering on y/n’s face as if he was studying every feature, every freckle, and every imperfection. Y/n feels as though he could melt in Remy’s hands if he would allow it.

Y/n’a heart is racing, at the sudden flirtation from the stranger, “do you always flirt with strangers?”, he asks.

“only tha strangers I like”, he responds.

“Oh, I see”, y/n smirks, he was enamored by him. He was drawn to him, his aura, his eyes, everything, “for some reason, i feel as though you do this a lot, and they fall for it”, Remy just rolls his eyes and chuckles.

“Maybe so, but mon cher, right now it’s only you.”

Y/n is silent; he isn’t able to make sentences. It’s like Remy is hypnotizing him in this moment. He’s finally able to form some type of words Remy interrupts y/n’s thoughts.

“Ya know what, cher…give ol’ Remy a chance”, his voice is teasing, yet the tone is still serious, “then maybe you’ll understand where i’m coming from”, he smiles.

In a swift, smooth motion, Gambit slides the Ace of Hearts card into Y/N’s hand, his fingers brushing against Y/N’s skin for just a moment longer than necessary. Y/N looks down at the card, then back up at Gambit, who was already starting to walk away, casting a final, lingering glance over his shoulder.

“Think about it, cher,” Gambit calls reaching for the door. “Might just be the best gamble you ever take.”

And with that, he was gone, leaving Y/N standing in the gallery, heart racing and a smile tugging at his lips. He glances down at the Ace of Hearts in his hand, feeling the flutter of excitement that Gambit had left in his wake.

Maybe fate wasn’t such a bad thing after all.

[transmascposi]

I feel really isolated because I hardly see any trans masculine positivity posts,,,, The only posts I see,, that are even shared by my own friends,,, are those that are complaining about trans mascs and how we're evil, ugly, and ruining the trans community,,,, I don't know what I did wrong besides simply exist as a trans masculine person,,, I still face misogyny and now I'm facing transphobia from my own friends,,, I even had to block somebody who said 'I have never found trans males to be sexually attractive' and instead of people telling them that's transphobic everyone was agreeing with them,,, I don't know where to turn anymore because everyone hates trans men so badly,,,, plus it's interesting that ppl will say how much they hate trans men but then fetishize our bodies,,,

I feel you. It's so lonely and difficult sometimes. It can feel like the whole world hates you. But I promise it's not like that. There's a lot of people who love us, really.

I'm sorry this is happening to you. You didn't do anything wrong. And even if you did, it wouldn't justify this treatment. You are valid and amazing and you bring so much beauty to the world and to the queer community. I had to cut off a few internet friends who hated on trans men and I don't regret it one bit. If they hate trans masculine people, I suggest cutting these people off. They are not good friends to you.

My advice is to try to spend less time online. The hate is much more concentrated here, and it's much more openly vicious. We certainly do have bad things happening to us in real life, but from my experience at least, the hate online is on another level. There are encounters that we can't really prevent in real life, but you can control the majority of your interactions online. I suggest avoiding the hate as much as you can, even if it means not spending time on your favorite platform. It can seem like I'm stating the obvious and I probably am, but at the same time, when I struggled a lot with online hate on trans mascs, I would keep spending time in trans masc spaces on tumblr that are full of this hate. I think we have the tendency to dwell in the hate, for whatever reason. To reblog it to argue with it, to keep repeating the same points to people who don't care about the truth, to try to counter the lie that trans mascs have it easy by witnessing the hate as a getcha. I'm not saying that you do this necessarily, but I definitely did it.

My second advice is to go out and meet people who understand and support you. A wonderful way to do that is activism. If you can, join your local trans activist group! You don't have to have inspiring speeches on big podiums and argue with people. You can help with small practical tasks — those people are very much needed and appreciated! Or you can find your local queer events and go there. It can be intimidating at first, especially if you go alone, but there's always someone a little bit lost at these events. People get it. Again, it definitely can be very difficult, but try to talk to some trans people there. Or anyone, really. You will find out that there's a lot of people who support and get us. And people who might not fully understand yet, but they want to try and they want to help. Even these imperfect encounters will warm your heart enough to forget a little about all the hate, even just for a moment. And being in activist circles and hearing people say your exact thoughts out loud — oh man it's SO satisfying. These people don't even have to be your friends. I'm trying to be an activist and there are people who I have fun with and who give me a sense of community — yet I don't meet them outside of activism stuff because I know we aren't a good match to be friends. And yet, their existence in my life brings me a lot of warmth. Building community is the key, really.

I wish you the best of luck and strength and I hope you will feel better soon.

[fuumiku]

They’re really interesting foils in many ways. I’ve always thought that Marcille & Mithrun have underrated dynamic potential. Give me the cringefail dungeon lords. Give me the elves with ears-centric metaphorical self-image issues. Give me the academic elites whose deepest strongest desires will always remain unreachable and the only option is to turn to the corrupt forbidden fruit of a demon pact. I am so so normal about Mithrun and Marcille

I wonder if the resemblance between captain Mithrun and general Hagreus aka Marcille’s fave in Dalclan is intentional… They definitely look very alike. It could represent idealization vs reality? Something something the romanticization of elves and their societal drama in their fiction vs a very real and imperfect product of their military system. The canaries certainly aren’t glamorous next to whatever Hagreus is the general of. I feel like she never had the opportunity to notice the resemblance herself bc within seconds of meeting him he was wrestling her on the ground but. If she had… She would so think he should have been his actor in the tallman stage play of Daltian Clan in that new extra comic hehe. I love the little details like Hagreus’ lips being drawn with extra details because they’re full and pretty while Mithrun’s lips are drawn with extra details because they’re chapped lmao.

This art is all silly and surface level but in my head mithrille is like so dramatic and I make up daltian clan level big plots with them gbdgd. I made a spotify playlist for mithrun if y’all interested, rn it’s mostly centered around cravings that consume and losing yourself and illusions inspired from his time as dungeon lord but it’s branching out. Varied vibes, levels of intensity and degrees of confusion and await you ✨ I would emotionally rant about Chainsaw Man ost lyrics and how they tie in with Mithrun and the winged lion’s relationship but this post is already a monster

I want more of these two please please please pleaseee just one or two interactions in the new canon content coming up… All they ever did was debate philosophy on desires and human self-fulfillment and try to murder each other, please… I never get to gush about them and I can’t shut up so if you want more thoughts I talk about them more below

To get a girl to peacefully accept arrest follow these simple steps: in private, ominously stand above her and forcefully interrogate her, while in public, tell her you’ve met before (untrue and also not a pickup line) and interrogate her with a thin veneer of decorum. If all else fails, threaten and follow through on said threat. My guy needs more than just physical therapy I’m afraid

Sorry if most of these were Marcille-centric with Mithrun standing there looking cool, if I were doing these more from Mithrun’s pov things would be like "She’s a bit much but I guess I don’t mind hanging around her." or "Oh you’re a half-elf? -insert elven supremacist rethoric-" or "I have to keep her from becoming demon stew." immediately followed by "Did someone say demon? Kill kill kill kill kill" since these are set prior to like really knowing another. Then things would be more like "huh she has bad tastes in novels but her magic research is pretty interesting" and "I’m lonely and don’t understand myself— Oh she loves talking about feelings? Oh shi-" That last one is an aspect of why I like Marcille and Mithrun’s potential dynamic lol. She’s very… Emotionally intelligent alongside being impulsive. You think you have no feelings because the world has beaten them out of you? Think again!! Marcille be upon ye! -In a therapy sort of way but mostly in a connecting with people and your own self through interpersonal relationships and talking kinda way. I just think a lively, upbeat, annoying friend way too interested in your personal life would do him good, the canaries are nice but like if Marcille went to prison and was a sort of extra new bunkmate I think that’d be interesting and fun to read is what I’m saying

Unlike Kabru she wants all the useless messy filler of his backstory, eating chips while listening. Like two chibi sets side by side, "me and my fellow canaries, name name and name-" "Hold on that’s too much info we have to compact this" vs "Then we were to sleep on the third floor of the dungeon, which had the look of a mausoleum, and name and name got into a fight over the campfire placement." while Marcille is like uh-huh what next what next while kicking her feet. She thinks of pre-dungeon pompous Mithrun and is like omg you went through a character arc and became better as a person- and then he opens his mouth and she’s like nevermind let’s keep working on that. She would also go "ew ur hair is greasy" and give him a full hair care treatment. What I’m saying is I need them to be forced to spend time in a dungeon together and become besties through a life or death roadtrip

Marcille is insecure about her ears, long, like an elf’s pride should be, but rounder, inelegant. Seeing Mithrun though, the epitome of beauty, with his half-cut ears make it a sillier thought. Not sure if Mithrun is the best person to reconnect with ur elven culture with but it sure is an option Marcille would so appreciate being around someone both cool headed and kind, I genuinely think they’d get along, like not that Senshi isn’t that too most of the time but I think Mithrun would be in a way that’s more refreshing to her. I’d be so curious about them discussing Dalclan, I doubt he’d have read it but she could make him read it, maybe post-canon with the excuse that they’re trying to find him a new hobby hah. He’d tear into the writing and everything but it’d be a fun time, I like to think that it’d make him a bit less prejudiced. Marcille @ Mithrun "👉👈 Soo maybe you don’t know these books they’re pretty recent having come out 50 years ago but…"

I’ve been in a Mithrun phase I want to make and read Mithrun-centric fics and angst so baaad. I razz him a lot here but he’s literally a traumatized military man that became obsessed with revenge due to bad coping and neglects himself in the process idk not much for him going on and some of it is because he has to work on himself, but hey no one’s perfect it all comes from a place of love and relating though I prommy. He’s the one ungodly angsty squeaky toy blorbo with brain damage rep I have don’t take him from me

[dr-spectre]

Frye is super pretty and I'm tired of people pretending characters with "off features" (half the time this means any feature that isnt white but hush(

But this is also coming from someone who's like "damn ventures pretty actually" LMAO

Frye is one of the prettiest Splatoon characters and it's not just because of her looks, it's also due to her personality.

Frye has a very strong sense of fashion, always has a smile on her face, and always brings life and energy wherever she goes. She loves her family to pieces and seems to be physically affectionate (I love that...)

Also Frye is physically strong, able to balance herself on a SPINNING OCTOSTOMP AND CAN SUMMON AN ARMY OF EELS!!! THAT IS BADDASS!!!

I dont wanna speak a whole lot about her physical appearance because I'll feel like some creep.... and I dont wanna be seen that way. But I will say, to those who hate her big forehead and make fun of imperfect features about her, say that to an actual Indian woman and tell me how that goes. Go on. Do it. Cause Frye is pretty much an Indian woman in terms of looks and inspiration. So go. Make fun of an Indian woman's forehead.

Like I'm just saying man... just saying...

"Oh, but it's a fictional character, so it doesn't matter," a fictional woman based on a real-life culture. Saying certain things about certain characters really paints a picture of the kind of person you are, dude. Straight up.

Also, I wanna share one more thing about frye.... I'm about to get into some self-indulgence so yeah...

Frye has the biggest bust out of the Idols and keeps her pants real low.... plus she keeps her tummy out most of the time and I AM A CERTIFIED TUMMY ENJOYER!! Also her butt ain't half bad but shhhhh...

Frye..... Frye Onaga....

just one night.... we can go anywhere you want. We can go to an arcade, have a nice walk through a park, go to a nice restaurant with your favourite foods... watch a movie together... go back to your place and do your favourite activities... talk about each other's interests.... and maybe.... a kiss at the end or something more would be a cherry on top of a nice day.... sigh...

......I'm so lonely.... I need a girlfriend...

ANYWAYS! THIS HAS BEEN ANOTHER FRYE APPRECIATION POST FROM DR. SPECTRE!!! TAKE CARE!!

[animebw]

Kumirei and Conflict Avoidance

So, after that earth-shattering Eupho episode last weekend, I am, unsurprisingly, hyperfixating on Kumirei once again. I keep rolling this conflict over in my head, how we got to this point, how inevitable it was in hindsight, how it reveals new sides of Kumiko and Reina's relationship I hadn't really considered before. And you know me: when I have thoughts, I have to talk about them. SPOILERS BELOW FOR ALL OF HIBIKE EUPHONIUM UP TO THIS POINT.

The thing is, Kumiko and Reina are incredibly different people. But one way in which their differences make them very much the same is that they both suck at handling messy interpersonal conflict. When faced with a problem that has no clear answer and every solution will end with someone getting hurt, they both balk at the prospect of actually facing that conflict head-on and dealing with that ambiguity. The difference is that Kumiko tries to shy away from dealing with the situation at all and hopes everyone will somehow find a way to get along, whereas Reina doubles down on her perspective and refuses to hear any counter-arguments. Kumiko reacts to uncomfortable issues by saying "Well, maybe everyone's right, I guess?", while Reina reacts by saying "No, I'm the only one who's right, and if you're against me you're doing it wrong."

And in a lot of ways, that makes them perfect for each other! Reina's stubborn passion is what pushed Kumiko out of her comfort zone and gave her the spark to actually care about what she's doing. And on the flipside, Kumiko's willingness to give people the benefit of the doubt gives Reina someone she can rely on when her pride is pushing everyone else away. At their best, they balance each other out perfectly, Reina inspiring Kumiko to try her hardest and Kumiko giving Reina a safe place to let herself be vulnerable. It's what's made them such an incredible couple for over a decade now.

But when things go really south, those instincts can end up bringing out the worst in each other instead. Reina's stubbornness can be so overwhelming that Kumiko can't bring herself to actually confront her for fear of how angry she'll be. And that reluctance ends up enabling Reina further, pushing her toward greater arrogance secure in the knowledge that at least one person will always be on her side. Reina makes Kumiko shrink even further, Kumiko lets Reina's ego swell even bigger, and suddenly the same odd-couple magic that pushed them to such great heights becomes a vicious circle dragging them both down.

Because at heart, neither of these girls have yet figured out how to navigate a situation that demands asking uncomfortable questions and making imperfect choices. Neither of them are brave enough to handle a messy conflict with the level of maturity it demands. Keep in mind that as many ups and downs as they've had, Kumiko and Reina have never truly gotten in a massive argument with each other, an argument that would demand them making those hard choices. The closest we got was the infamous episode in season 2 where Reina's crush on Taki-sensei boils over and threatens to drive a rift between them- and there again, Kumiko deflects the conflict, telling Reina she's "rooting for her" rather than face the issue head-on and deal with the fact that the girl she loves is stuck on her feelings for an adult who will never return them. Which, as I've discussed before, is framed just about as tragically and depressingly as cinematic language can accomplish.

But now that Kumiko's band leader? She can't keep running from arguments anymore. She has to dive headfirst into the thick of all her bandmates' issues and actively choose how to best keep them together, even if that means making hard calls she isn't comfortable making. And Reina's in a position of power now where her hard-headedness doesn't just affect her, but trickles down to all the underclassmen she's trying to lead. Neither of them can afford to let their worst habits drive their decision-making anymore- because it won't just be them that suffer if they refuse to rise to the occasion.

Which brings us to the boiling point of Kuroe taking Kumiko's place in the audition. In the aftermath of this upset, we see both Kumiko and Reina's coping mechanisms pushed to their limits. Kumiko's trying to calm everyone's worries while her own heard is still a whirlwind, Reina's doubling down and refusing to even consider Taki-sensei made a wrong call, and it reaches a point where this state of affairs just isn't sustainable anymore. There's too much tension built up, there's too many people's dreams and hopes on the line. Something has to give, or everything's going to give.

And it's here, at last, that Kumiko finally does something she's never had the courage to do.

She stands up to Reina and tells her, point-blank: "No, Reina, YOU'RE wrong."

No wonder it feels so monumental. No wonder Reina's shaken enough to rip apart their relationship. After years of not being able to address the deepest, stickiest issues that lie between them, Kumiko shatters the cycle of enabling they've been falling into and tells Reina that she is wrong. She is wrong to put herself above everyone else and not listen to alternatives. She is wrong to blindly put faith in Taki-sensei at the expense of all her bandmates counting on her to have their best interests at heart. She is wrong to let her pride and stubbornness guide her. It's bad for the band, it's bad for her, and it's bad for her relationship with Kumiko. And if they're going to have any chance of moving forward, then she needs to be just as brave in facing this mess honestly as Kumiko is. She needs the courage to accept that she isn't always right, that her way or the highway is no way at all, that the uncompromising road she walks will one day separate her from everyone she once held close.

She needs to let go of her fear of emotional honesty and meet Kumiko on the level she's finally been able to reach.

And you know what sticks with me the most? After Reina lashes out at Kumiko and essentially tells her to get stuffed, we see the horror in Kumiko's eyes as she realizes the consequences of finally standing up to the girl she loves...

...only for her expression to settle back into the determination of a girl standing by what she said regardless.

After so many years, Kumiko is facing her closest companion's worst traits dead in the face. And in this moment, in this expression, she decides that doing the right thing is more important than clinging to their relationship through thick and thin.

It's a face that says, "If this is the choice you're making, then this is worth ending things over."

And I can't blame her one bit.

[variousqueerthings]

thing about rose, for me, is that she wasn't there first -- this in a "she was first in nu!who in the sense that this was the first person to travel with nine, and the first person since the timewar, and the last person that nine was with, to the point that ten was born out of that experience/modelled on her."

and in that framing, I am a big fan of her haunting of the narrative, because it start outs with her placing herself inside the doctor's ribcage and rebooting their ability to want to feel things, but unfortunately rose is still a human, like every human the doctor travelled with before, it's just that the doctor forgot how to steel themself against that inevitability because of the circumstances around meeting rose

this is The thing that I find tragic about martha, because I think she could have been that person, if she'd been the first person post-timewar to travel with the doctor, but because she's coming in during bleeding-heart times, she's got to deal with triage instead. and yes, there are wonders, and yes, there are good times, but for a lot of it, it's shrapnel, and I think if it hadn't been, she would have had a very different attitude towards *waves hands* space and time travel and aliens and the universe (one where she wouldn't be the person trusted with something like the osterhagen key)

and donna had a sense of that Space the doctor was in post-rose (she canonically stopped the doctor from dying in runaway bride) and stepped away from it, and didn't get back to the doctor until some of that hole-in-chest had been bandaged up, which martha did a great job of, but didn't get to really benefit from, and I think that's the sad thing about martha jones, is that she absolutely got a taste of the beauty and the splendor, but never without all the violence and heave weight that was put onto her

which, again, she seems to have been very aware of, considering she joined UNIT and Torchwood. her eyes were barely ever rose tinted (no pun here) during her whole journey in the story. martha really is in my opinion the most tragic companion (that I've met so far, I know Adric straight up dies, but maybe he had some fun times before that?), because yes, donna loses her memories and rose is in a parallel universe, but that's more tragic for the doctor -- they've both built lives

in donna's case there's probably a lot of imperfection in that life, but clearly a lot of joy as well, with her and her husband and her kid and her mum, and I'm sure she'd have preferred to be the donna who saw the universe and was splendid, but martha never gets to forget, and has to continue her life one step out of sync of everything she could have been

which, maybe her life is pretty flipping fantastic, but we really don't know, which is the biggest thing I side-eye about the first nu!who era. that whole weird ending with the sontaran and mickey is like... anti-character work, it answers nothing and it makes very little sense

all I know about her at the end is that she more than anyone saw the doctor's life and became a soldier (still a doctor as well, but...) because that was the work she saw needed doing, and she's the kind of person who does what needs doing. but is she... okay? youknow?

but going back to the original point, is that framing martha through the lens of rose is all well and good in the sense that rose is the reason the doctor is at that emotional point when he meets martha -- although donna absolutely had a very big hand in that as well -- but once we've established that, martha's arc is martha's arc, and it's dull to me to frame it as the "rebound" arc or even particularly about alloromanticism (including -- and this is why i get why people do it in fandom -- some shit said by rtd, which is just less interesting than what I get out of it, so shhhh)

she's got so much going on, and her relationship with the doctor changes the trajectory of her life, and it's in many ways a more interesting and far less straightforward trajectory of bad-to-better that many companions get -- it's a wonderfully complicated narrative that (and again, I get that some of this comes from within deliberate framings of the text, even though I think it's more than open enough to do more with, death of the author and all that -- but certainly not all of this is text either, some of it is ignoring what is actually there) is done a disservice by not going through the real messed up fascinating extraordinary shit that's going on during her era + arc in s4

but also... is she ok? I want to know. it's one of my top three burning questions, since we're getting a bit of best-ofs of the noughties DW era, some of your crimes can be righted by a simple bit of martha mr davies