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#that nobody cares to know anybody
kumashire · 1 year
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I try to be Good and Strong and Independent Etc. and mind my business and stay in my lane and focus on improving myself and stay busy with my Independent hobbies but I don't think anyone likes to feel unloved and annoying all the time. I think that would start to wear on anyone a bit
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front-facing-pokemon · 4 months
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m1d-45 · 2 years
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my take on sagau lore / logistics
summary: sagau lore! includes you the creator, self-awareness, khaenri’ah, celestia, literally everything i could think of
word count: ~4.1k
-> warnings: spoilers for literally everything bar the sumeru archon quests. khaenri’ah lore, kaeya + albedo lore, celestia lore, archon quests, all of it. i ramble and stray off topic and swear while doing so.
-> lowercase intended. forgive the format pls
taglist: @samarill || @thenyxsky || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie
< masterlist >
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ok, so, just off the top of it, let’s address the largest problem with this au, specifically my genre of it:
how can teyvat be real if it’s a game?
great question! the answer is that it’s both.
i haven’t thought this through entirely, only enough that i personally can suspend my disbelief about the fics i read, but the way i see it is that you, the creator, made teyvat a billion (or more idk) years ago. you made the people—or the animals, if you still wanna subscribe to evolution—the lands, the waters and the mountains. everything was carefully pulled and molded by your hands, your influence stretching to how the wind blew.
(that’s because the god who controls it wants your attention so badly but whoooo that’s cultish territory)
anyway. fast-track past the archon war, yeah? after that was sorted, you began to hand out visions, personally at first before assigning celestia to do so. there were simply too many people, and you could not judge them all. it would not be fair.
so you didn’t.
but i’d be lying if the archon war didn’t take a toll on you. you’d been influencing it from the sidelines, carefully making sure as few innocents were harmed as possible, trying to keep the terrain intact. you were technically fighting, but on the side of teyvat itself.
(it loved you for it. every blade of grass and leaf on a stem sung your praises.)
micromanaging like that, across an entire planet, let alone trying to simultaneously set up the constellations you wanted for vision holders… you’re exhausted.
now, you could, in theory, just burrow down into the heart of the earth and rest, but that felt… impersonal, almost. you still wished to look after your world, you just wanted to have a little less responsibility while you did so.
so you left the planet, momentarily, leaving that entire universe behind, and made another. it was, admittedly, not your best work, worse than even the rest planets you tried before teyvat, but you were tired. you half-heartedly scattered some resources, salted the water, and placed the beginnings of life. with a final goodbye to celestia, you allowed your soul to rest in the core of this new planet you called ‘earth.’
now, you weren’t just going to sit there, no. as the people above lived, oblivious to the god resting in the molten core, your subconscious pulled some strings. not enough to influence wars—so many wars, so much cruelty and bloodshed—or any major occurrences, but enough to shift some small details around. these people would start a company. this game would be launched. and when you, your soul, had finally recovered from the ordeal of managing a whole planet, a child would be born.
you knew mortal minds had a hard time conceptualizing the divine, let alone dealing with the knowledge that they were one, so you made the executive decision to remove your memory. call it a product of your pity, but you decided you’d live a human life here before returning to teyvat. the world’s time difference shouldn’t make it that much longer for your lovely followers, only about a year or so, so it would be fine. you set up some dominoes, then allowed yourself to be mortal when they fell.
bad call. turns out you shouldn’t try and fudge space-time when you’re overworked and burnt out. the time dilation ended up being reversed, meaning an average life of 80 years was 4,800 years for your followers.
still, not all was lost! you, human, came into contact with a device, came into contact with advertisements from a company you, god, had a heavy hand in. the world you had loved carefully recreated, admittedly with far less detail and nuance, but what could you expect of the technology at the time?
as you downloaded the game, a final domino fell into place. the traces of divinity in your blood bled into your machine, turning the screen from a screen, and into a portal.
billions of billions of light years away, exiting this universe and entering another, two twins approached your world. they had witnessed you build it all but frowned at your lack of presence. their world, one of many that you had also crafted, still was visited by you from time to time, but this... where had you gone? were your people okay?
they approached, only to be stopped by one of celestia’s guards. boiling red cubes stung the air, lashing at their sides as she—the sustainer, she said—fought. the two drew back, sharing a look, and when they dove-
your light filled the air, time seeming to slow to a crawl. your chosen traveller sucked in a breath, feeling the familiar aura envelop them. even as their twin was swallowed, as their stomach opened into a pit and their heart crumbled, as gravity took hold of their suddenly much weaker form, you were there.
and so your journey in teyvat began once more, this time not as the creator, but as the creation.
that’s the basic lore down. yes, i know ‘basic’ took nearly 1k words on its own, but oh well. anyway, now onto some other details outside of that, such as….
the raiden shogun!
the visions were signs of your favor—not that the comman man knew that, but the gods did—so why would she ever confiscate them? simple; after you had started giving out visions, you had first passed the duty to celestia, and then… left. it’s reasonable, in her mind, that the visions were sapping at your energy, keeping you away even longer. she hoped, in a twisted sort of desire, that she could hasten your return. celestia had tried to stop her, stopping giving out electro visions, but it wasn’t enough. other visions were still in her lands, and she needed to remove them. if only on her isle of eternity, anything harming you would not be allowed.
the tsaritsa!
ok, i admit, i’m not sure how much of what i’m about to say is canon. i watch too much game theory to be 100% sure that this is Actual Lore, but… whatever. so the tsaritsa is collecting all these gnoses, right? the gods’ connection to celestia? just… kinda taking them, collecting these connections, weakening celestia so she can take it down. her reasoning is very similar to ei’s, in that you created celestia and imbued it with some of your power. however, you must have accidentally given too much, wanting them to thrive, and had weakened yourself. so, she figures, by taking down celestia, she can restore you your strength!
but wait, you ask, why not do a vision hunt decree like the shogun? simple! you gave out visions before you involved celestia, so they clearly aren’t the problem. besides, she thinks there’s a lovely poetic quality to taking down celestia with soldiers bearing weapons they awarded.
delusions!
it’s people sabotaging their health to pretend their strength is god-given, not much changes in this au. there’s implications between it and the tsaritsa’s motives for gnosis-hunting—notably if she’s taking down celestia because your strength was drained, why drain the strength of her people—but that’s ~not my problem~
morax?
morax!!! silly boy. anyway, he doesn’t see any problem with stepped down as an archon, if that’s your worry. after all, you yourself left, letting the people run themself, so…. surely he could—should, even—do the same. he feels maybe a bit bad about leaving liyue without anything, but soothes himself knowing they don’t know you’re gone. most mortals don’t, really. but in a similar vein…
venti!
venti feels the same way. if anything, his conviction is even stronger. you left your people—not entirely, admittedly, but still, you did—so he should be able to as well. he knew you had left celestia in your wake, but he had left the knights! and surely, to be overly-controlling was worse, right? you had allowed decarabian to fall, so you must not want dictators(a good thing, as he doesn’t know how he’d handle you going against one of his most core virtues).
celestia!
for the sake of the au, celestia will be kinda proxy rulers of teyvat. i know there’s probably some lore out there suggesting otherwise, likely something in the 3.2-3.3 archon quests, but i haven’t done those and so it can’t be held against me. anyway, you’re tired after the war right? so you decide, as plan A, to create celestia as a council of proxy rulers, to enact your ideals—the heavenly principles—and take care of things. this goes south, because the act of creating celestia drains even more of your strength, and you really hadn’t taken a break since you started creating teyvat so maybe it’s time to pick up plan B off the back burner…
(in celestia’s opinion, burrowing into the earth should have been plan B. taking a nap in a gilded palace should have been plan C. leaving the planet entirely was the nuclear option.)
paimon!
OOOOHHHHH BOYYYYY the emotions i have about this little fairy aidjwrkfkkds
anyway. the way i see it, she’s a manifestation of the remaining divine energy in your body/teyvat. pick your favorite, the end result is the same: she’s attached to your traveller, to you, your device. she can vaguely sense the buttons you have—which is why the tutorial changes across platforms—and loves whenever you open the paimon menu, because she can bask in your light all the more. off camera, her and the traveller gush about you. canon, i said so.
anyway, she’s the one that gives us the ability to time travel so the way i see it, she has to be at least a little divine, or be able to wield power of that strength.
take a shot every time i say strength this fic
i have some feelings about the time mechanic, most notably that it’s likely an alteration of the (very scuffed) time dilation system you implemented, but i’m writing this during school hours and can’t really be bothered with trying to rationalize that. for now, just know that Its a Thing That Exists.
co-op!
if we’re operating under the ideal that your game is the only one self-aware, then how does co-op work?
um… it doesn’t—
ok ok ok uh there’s two interpretations you can go with, of which i don’t have a favorite:
Option 1: when you go to co-op, your (self-aware) characters are transported into the digital world of your companion. they’re confused, because everything seems flat and empty of detail and there’s these weird bars above enemies and HOLY SHIT IS THAT ME???
they eventually gather that this is a false recreation of teyvat, one run by another person. whether or not they can see the chat is up to you. umm regarding farming and stuff: that means tackling the inventory, which… i’ll talk about that later, i swear-
Option 2: when you enter co-op, you leave teyvat. your vessels go back to their places—again, i’ll touch on that later, promise—and your aura leaves. paimon’s the only constant, but that’s mostly because she follows you or the traveller at all times (if you don’t have your traveller on your team… wait a few paragraphs pls). she is fascinated by the digital world, more so of the replicas of your vessels within it. maybe she tells the traveller of it when they have time.
they’re kinda similar, boiling down to whether or not you want your vessels to have a cosmic-horror level freak out at the fact that that’s them. i don’t have a favorite, and usually kinda fluctuate between the two whenever it’s convenient.
the inventory!
the inventory!!! arguably the most convenient system in teyvat, of which my answer is wildly inconvenient.
the basic principle of it is that it’s a pocket dimension, much like the one paimon vanishes into. it’s a very cool pocket dimension, with a menu and filtration systems, but that’s all it is. it preserves the quality of food, it keeps things from burning each other(i. e. mist flower corollas and flaming flower stamens are right next to each other, yet the quality of both never dwindles), and generally keeps things frozen in a sort of stasis. i like to think that vessels with a good sense of detail can pick up on an odd taste/texture to the food if it’s been in there a while, with the effect lessening as the food quality(suspicious → delicious scale) and level (stars) increases, but it really doesnt impact anything all that much.
regarding co-op: this is where things get blurry. if the inventory is a pocket dimension, and co-op is fake…. the best option is to, once more, chalk it up to divinity. whether yours, as you pick them from the digital world, of the remains of your aura in teyvat, when you return.
(another option that doesn’t work as well is thinking of the inventory as a tally, as in there’s a number of items you have and when you access it the number goes down and it summons / creates the item. the number is a representation of the power stored for that specific item- kinda like the omni-ubiquity nets, i guess? anyway, this is kinda pushing things, and though i don’t prefer it, it definitely can be useful to think about in some situations, such as an imposter au where you(reader) can draw energy from the inventory via sacrificing food or supplies. that’s really cool actually wtf-)
KHAENRI’AH HOW COULD I FORGET KHAEN-
so. khaenri’ah.
….i don’t know a lot about the lore of khaenri’ah.
[one wiki check and a lot of deleted ranting later]
khaenri’ah was a godless nation. it didn’t have a god ruling over it, it didn’t have a god influencing or building it, it didn’t have a - oh my god khaenri’ah is the nation of hubristic greed.
sorry i had a revelation mid-sentence there: to clarify, khaenri’ah was built entirely by people. they may (read: did) worship a god, you, but refused to allow you to meddle with their nation. that was their creation. you could have all of teyvat—and they would give you some of their crops to try and satisfy you—but you could not have their nation. they lived underground, away from your holy light and the overbearing gaze of celestia, and in the dark of a cave with only the earth as their witness, they began to learn khemia. they began to learn how to create, how to mimic your power. theirs was more transmutation, less pure creation, but it was so close to it that rhinedottir let it get to her head. she started her program, created durin and [REDACTED]- sorry, subject two (have i mentioned how much i hate he doesn’t have a name? fucked up fr fr). eventually, finally, after many tests and trials and rifthounds, with abyssal magic beginning to stain her hands, she created synthetic life.
the port on its neck sealed into a shimmering star, crystal blue eyes fluttering open, chalk ribs expanding as it took a breath. gold watched with rapt attention, pen falling from her hand.
she’d done it.
high on joy, she kept going, neglecting her new creation, herself, neglecting even basic safety, and eventually, she had toppled the pride of man.
khaenri’ah fell.
this allows for khaenri’ans such as dainslef, albedo, and kaeya to all know of and worship you—important, since kaeya is a character we’re automatically given—while still being bitter and jaded over khaenri’ah. this keeps as much of the lore in-game as intact as possible, with the only big difference being that khaenri’ah dedicated itself to you, but it would not be influenced by you. it was toppled by its own hubris, its desire to be divine without ever worshipping the god that made them too much for mortal men to handle. they don’t hate you, and in fact the fall of their nation has made it clear that they should have respected you more. they don’t blame you for it, as it was their own desire that brought them down, but they are a little more aware of the power of a god.
FAQ!!
i don’t have the traveller on my team, how does that work lore-wise?
excellent question! i…. don’t really know—
the way i see it, this is mostly a problem attached to the concept of ‘parties’ in the first place(again, please put a pin in the idea, we’re almost there). paimon is always with us, but the traveller… since they don’t have ‘a place to be’ as with your other vessels, as you were with them from the start… you could say that they’re always with you. silently watching from the realm of stars just outside of reality, watching you level your characters and give them strength. they wish you could pay more attention to them, but they know that teyvat is your prize creation, the people within it your most beloved. while you had encouraged them and their sibling to traverse your other worlds, it made sense that you’d want to empower these people first. your choices were.. odd, but you seemed happy, mostly, so they were too. ultimately, they are just another of your creations, and they want you to be happy just as the others do.
what happens when the game closes?
this connects to both the party system and the ‘realm of stars’ i mentioned in the traveller’s section. now, the personal belief i subscribe to is that it’s… another pocket dimension sorry—
akcnkwdjdkd ok so you know in the character menu how the background is all hazy and star-like and tinted the color of their element? i think the hydro’s have bubbles floating around but i have just spent too much time in enkanomiya-
anyway, that’s a ✨separate dimension✨. i imagine its like a line, where your characters are arranged like the bar on the side (top if you’re a pc gamer). characters can look over if they wish, though that’s dependent on some other factors (i know this is already long but i’ll elaborate on this later). the poses for weapons, artifacts, etc. are all forced on them, like strings on a puppet—war flashbacks for my scaramouche. they’re tugged into place, and stay like that. your mains are used to you fussing about with their artifacts, and have learned to simply rest into the feeling. why shouldn’t they, after all?
ANYWAY this is getting long. so when you’re in the field, your characters fall away save your party members, who move to the odd starry landscape of the party menu. there’s a large screen, which allows them to see like it’s your screen, almost. there’s a health bar, they can see the energy, and though that’s about it the important bit is that they can still see the character on field and the battle around them. this way they know what to expect, and where to aim, where to brace for an impact because sorry, they have the most hp and you need to tank this hit. when the game closes, you swap team members, etc. they are transported back to where they were prior to being on your team. now, for those you don’t utilize as often, they aren’t fully pulled into the character menu, as this would cause complications, but they are vaguely aware of when you open it. this way they can prepare in the rare case you switch to them for whatever reason.
additionally, when you shut down genshin, the traveller takes your characters’ place. they hold your place, often using the time to catch up with paimon and eat, both talking about their separate perspectives on your battle. paimon from the outside, watching the vessels switch in a shower of gold sparks, and the traveller from the inside, watching them lean on each other when their health was low and swap encouraging phrases during a tough fight. the traveller can’t really move all that much, but they don’t have to stay very still—what’s the chance you’ll notice they’re facing the wrong direction anyway?—which is good since they may have to defend themself against any enemies wandering in. if they’re off your team and unbuilt, it’s a little difficult, but between their status as an outlander and paimon’s influence, it’s not that big of a hassle.
(sorry this one’s real long but this is the concept i spent the most time developing. i have a very very long albedo fic where this mechanic is center stage so i have a lot of junk stored in my mind abt it)
what about friendship levels?
friendship levels!!! in-game they’re a metric of how long/much a character is with you, and it’s the same in sagau. the higher a character’s friendship, the more of your aura they emit by proxy, since they’re… in the absolute kindest way possible, you know how shoes have to be broken in -? yeah—
the harsh tugs of your device commanding them to move softens into a gentle guide, but they’re so in-tune with your playstyle that they go ahead of the strings, attacking slightly quicker. a high-friendship team has synergy like no other, the characters swapping just before you actually press the button to do so, their elemental reactions booming brighter, skills and bursts doing that much more damage just because they know what their doing by heart. they’re certain they could replicate it even without you, though they’d never dare, and your main sometimes finds themself repeating your usual rotation in their head to help them. swap, skill, swap, skill, burst, they mutter, their fingers tapping along where the buttons would be as they try to puzzle something out. swap, skill, swap, passive, swap, the familiar routine providing comfort.
how does the concept of being “self-aware” work?
lovely question.
it doesn’t.
jsksskdjd i feel like a software developer— ANYWAY-
google defines self-aware as “having conscious knowledge of one's own character and feelings”, which isn’t (inherently) the case. in relation to video games, it’s usually something along the lines of “this game is aware it’s a game” which doesn’t work since, as we’ve established, teyvat isn’t a game.
in this case, being self-aware means recognizing that you are operating through a device. it means knowing that you are not controlling them directly, that you instead use a proxy. it means, for characters like albedo, recognizing the sticky binds of code that limit his movements, it means registering that you are still far, far away, and that you only feel this close because of your device. it means, for some such as, say, diluc, there wasn’t a reason why kaeya was a vessel before him. it means knowing that their god is still lost, and knowing that they have to ensure you come back safely.
and that’s about it! discarding some icky topics such as the semantics of an isekai (which boils down to tapping into the divinity stored in your device so it doesn’t really matter much either way) and the abyss (which i don’t know enough about lore-wise, sorry) that’s everything i keep in mind when i write my genshin impact self-aware works!
if you have any further questions, feel free to either reply or send in an ask, or check out my masterlist if you want to see these concepts in practice.
have a good one!
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bonetrousledbones · 1 year
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i am the only one who understands this but. sludge saturday baby
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snail-does-art · 6 months
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Does it count as Misha fanart if he's not even in it.
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bunnihearted · 3 months
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sometimes i truly do feel so isolated and alienated because even if people on here are lonely and sad they still have friends and partners and they're capable of having jobs and getting educations ... and im like ok wow im like actually the only one who doesn't just "feel" those things but also is completely worthless and insignificant. cool 👍
#and it's why i cant feel connected to anyone even if some ppl are nice to me#bc ok yeah but at the end of the day i still AM a loser while u have a life and ppl who care abt u........#nobody gets me. like for real...... ☹️#having avpd is fucked up and a curse tbh#idk rn im also in an avpd moment where i cant even reply to anyone at all#im like ok wow.... i both feel like im only worthless and stupid and awkward anyway why even bother trying#plus im genuinely like tired...... i just wanna be the most important to ONE person and be chosen by them over everyone else#never having experienced that just makes everything else pale away in comparison like i cant even find it in me to feel anythinf#anything*#im just feeling so fucking sad and im realizing how fkn alone i an#AM* god trying so hard not to cut myself since i cant even type properly#and since i have avpd that only makes me isolate myself more which makes me more miserable#but also the thing is... my only choice IS to isolate myself bc i dont have anybody#having short shallow social exchanges w ppl who i only exist a little bit to is making me feel more empty#i so badly need deep strong emotional connections#but actually i dont even care abt that... really truly all i want is to be no 1 to one person#so.... i dont know i dont fkn know all i know is that im so lonely#and even if shallow impersonal things can sustain me sometimes im in an avpd mood rn where i feel so fuckinf#fucking***** broken and worthless and all i want is to further isolate myself#bc when i try to talk to ppl im reminded of how stupid i am#bc they mean sm more to me than i do to them#bc they have real lives with real ppl that matter to them!!!#it's not what my soul needs so i just cant bring myself to.....#idk i also feel like an asshole bc i truly appreciate nice messages#idk i just wanna cry tbh and kms bc i will always have avpd and be broken 🩷
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monards · 6 months
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i know hoyo is setting up rhine to have good intent and whatever in her trying to 'save' khaneri'ah or whatever; but i REALLY hope they stay with the cruel persona thats been built up for her. because it would be so wonderful to see a character who had good intent in the beginning just get absolutely corrupted; with the inability to ever go back to that prior state purely because of what had happened. also because there is NO way in her turning back after all that shit
#sorry. i dont think theres any good and plausible explanation for rhine to still be a kind or gentle person in general#she can (and SHOULD) have her moments. but it'd make so much more sense (and be much more impactful) for her to be inherently cruel#because look at all the stuff thats happened#i love the indomitable human spirit trope. dont get me wrong.#but rhine has that in the way she WONT stop her research till shes either dead or murdered. she is not gonna be gentle kind and optimistic#she watched all her kids (that she was SHOWN to care for) get very brutally murdered.#had to then go and kill her next creations that she didn't consider perfect (which most certainly fucks a women up. no matter what you say)#made the 'perfect creation' and the way she treated him was obviously a HUGE contrast to how she was before (being gentle and nuturing)#and left him (albeit with what we can guess was good intent) with NO goodbye just#a recommendation letter. a text. and his final mission#she could have good intent#and still care for others#dont get me wrong!!!!!!!#but shes. human???#humans can be (as much as i hate to say it) a tad selfish when it comes to survival#and being antagonized demonized AND shunned by teyvat and even her own people. having to survive multiple gods wrath#isn't. gonna be good for the human psych#and it isn't gonna be something fixable#look at how furina progressively faltered over a hundered years WHILE being adored#she already started waning in her ethics and morals (as someone immortalized as a human WOULD)#with exposing lyney and all of that when it was VERY clearly the morally wrong thing to do (which her as a human would know)#and being relatively pessimistic and clearly spiralling#(no hate. i love furina with all my heart.)#if thats how FURINA started going#imagine rhine who has nobody (save maybe alice. but i doubt she'd be constant given her spontaneous nature and refusal to sit still)#shit man. even I'D go crazy and be horrible.#its okay and natural to be bitter#and its not as if anybody was there to help#hexenzirkel has a ton of women who survived their own nations falling yes#but not ONE of them (from what we know) has had circumstances any where near rhine's
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Please BE EXCITED about stuff you like/ want to be excited about 💞 That's what life supposed to be about, finding joy in the smallest things, in the things we enjoy and love. And the people that judge us for having that joy in our hearts lose their own life, because they spend too much time judging someone else's life instead of doing something with their own. FUCK them
this is one of my favorite asks and i love you
#nobody will ever stop me from getting excited about things i like#i just always feel like i'm not allowed to share that excitement with anybody directly because of being made fun of in the past#or like i at least have to tone it down by like 99% and make it very brief#because of fear of rejection so i keep it to myself contained in my own space#sometimes i really wanna talk about my favorite things with somebody but i'm like#'nobody knows or cares about this. what if i send something and they hate it and tell me it's horrible'#(a reaction i've been the most used to. either that or just silence)#and i wouldn't know who would actually be interested or if i would be putting them in a situation#where they're not interested at all but they're too nice to say it and then i feel annoying if i keep talking about it#because now even if it isn't SAID that they hate it i still always feel like people are thinking that behind it all#so like if somebody came at me right now telling me everything i like is horrible#that itself wouldn't really bother me because i could just block and continue life without a second thought about that person specifically#because that's just unnecessary and rude regardless of what it's about and i would assume it's just somebody looking to stir things up#delete/block. not taking it personally and not worth thinking about#but it's the anxiety built up from it happening for so long and so consistently from so many people and some that i used to be close to#that now it feels to me that everybody feels that way even if i know LOGICALLY that it isn't true. the feeling is still there#it's one of the long-term effects that are so hard to get rid of once they're set#this is just another thing about myself to work on for probably my entire life#but russ has been helping me with so much lately it's unbelievable
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skinnypaleangryperson · 6 months
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Nothing but crushed dreams, constant neuroticism and inner and outer abuse and admitted ongoing sporadic thought with the fact that there's really nothing to do these days except to be in despair and to be abused by strangers that will never care about you
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neonbrutalism · 1 year
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It occurs to me i might have the ITSV timeline all fucked up bc i entirely forgot that Christians wait like a week or more before they bury a dead body so Peter Parker wouldn't have been buried the next day as I thought he was. Jewish people bury their dead like immediately, the next day or the next if we have to.
wtf are you guys doing with a dead body for a week?
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weezerlvr228 · 18 days
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why he so mysterious…
demur
#weezer#rivers cuomo#i had a bad day! well actually i looked freaking amazing and got sm compliments today sooo!! i am pretty as freaksauce.#it was fairly good but i failed my physics test :(( …. it’s so sad… 34 percent before the curve.#34?!??? HOW???? I THOUGHT J ATE TS UP???#so yeah; insane …. but it’s okay because i’m good at other stuff and have other things i am good at!#oh yeah so guys guys guys.#there’s this girl who i do not like and i have not liked her since freshman year; right? and she’s fairly popular; your average overachieve#ing person; BUT i always didn’t like her. she left a bad taste in my mouth and i didn’t know if i was just jealous or WHAT#BUT I HAVE REASON TO HATE JER! MY GUT WAS RIGHT!#good job lyss#she’s a homewrecker and basically likes to get w people who have partners…. AND SHE WSS BEING FLIRTY W MY BF LIKE HELLO ???#who she think she is?#my bf doesn’t talk to her anymore since i said i don’t rlly like her and how she is thankfully#but my friend was talking to me in Seminar and was like ‘oh ya if i had a bf i’d kms than let him be around her.’ is that mean ? or is it#okay since she has done that multiple times then gets defensive and hates to be called out for kt#her gf right now had cheated on her boyfriend for the girl i don’t like; and this has happened TWICE!#HELLO???#like wtf…. and she sends the screenshots of it when she stops talking w the person who cheated on their partner for her and starts to play#the victim… like the weezer song. you can’t pay for dinner w the victim card ya.#well billy talent; but you know what i mean. so she’s playing the victim and she was saying “omg…. this feels so wrong…. but-but i love you.#stfu yn 😭#like holy moly. holy guac. “i don’t know how to quit you…’ turn off your phone ! (^^) close the app !#easy as that girl dw i got you#but for real. NOBODY LIKES JER BC SHES SO TOXIC. OMG IM SO JAPPY IM NOT ALONE ONNMY HATE TRAIN#anyways yeah. i can go more in detail for you all if anybody cares about my silly high school drama
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gaylittleguys · 10 months
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hey actually what was up with the artemis fowl series suddenly pivoting to make the grown adult woman a love interest for the teenage boy. like I’ve blocked everything after the first 4 books from my mind bc I hate them for many reasons but like. genuinely what the fuck.
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nihiltism · 4 months
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hell with it new url might change it later. honestly surprised this one wasnt taken
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fslurusami · 1 year
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you know how sometimes theres some popular character and most of the fanstuff is mostly accurate on the surface but you personally have some lived experience shared w this character that enables you to have a deeper understanding of little nuances under the hood that inform things like their decision making and stuff. its on a sliding scale of accuracy of course. personally i mostly get this with my mental disorders with characters such as ogata but sometimes theres LITTLE TINY THINGS that bother me about specifically the various violence related fetishes. and the fact that it bothers me itself bothers me cuz i feel like. "oh Clearly you havent received or inflicted wounds for sexual pleasure". yes obviously they havent done that. nobody else does that. i am abnormal in nature and insane in the head
#obviously not Rlly nobody else im well aware. but it is uncommon. and it doesnt Rlly bother me but i can often tell#yes ienaga vore jokes are funny but i dont think shes into vore based on what we see of her character and attitudes towards cannibalism#however. usami and tsurumi 100% are. tsurumis gay little speech in that scene would not be out of place on a vore sideblog thats EXACTLY#how certain ppl talk about it. thats literally It. tsurumi tokushirou invented vore in 1907#thats just the most clear cut and easily explainable example i think but there are so many little bits of tiny nuance idek#there are different attitudes of course but i feel like ienaga doesnt rlly feel any Connection to eating ppl and sure there are ocs and#little stories or scenarios about the pred just being like 'yea its just food' cuz some preys find that rlly hot but. irl there arent rlly#any of that kind of pred cuz if they dont care then. they dont care lol. like they dont Care about vore. so theyre not into vore. u know#so i think shes not into vore sexually and such shes literally just here for medicinal purposes or w/e. but that is just my opinion idk#sorry for vore essay in the tags i am autistic 👍 those deviantart stamps are not ironic they are a Warning#if anybody like. cares about being 1/5th of a mm off in their depiction of masochism or smthng i will answer questions. but be prepared for#me to get at least this ^^^ autistic about it. i dont have a phd in masochism but i can at least say with certainty that i have never#said 'it hurts so good' in real life. the full sentence like that is just a little cheesy in my opinion. 'it hurts' usually speaks 4 itself#og post
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interstellarstorms · 2 months
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So basically one high school crush is engaged and the other has been dead for almost five years. And I’m still living with my mother.
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stonerzelda · 11 months
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FOR the record i would totes preesh if when referring to me u abstain from calling me girl/lady/whatever this isnt about anybody in particular but for the last couple months a lot of ppl have been calling me that and im annoying abt it lol sorry so. Blease and thankx 🙏
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