#that maybe I can accomplish it?

[crimsonblackrose]

I had planned to spend most of the time my family is out of town looking for jobs but instead I’ve spent it packing. I’ve been looking at everything and deciding will I use this this year? No. Into a box it goes so that when I move it’ll be easier. But one of my coworkers responded to this with “Are you sure you’re okay with moving? Like emotionally?”

And I’ve just had to sit here like well damn.

[gascreates]

^^ infectious

[icewindandboringhorror]

I made a few new wax seal stamps out of clay (like the ones I did for my worldbuilding stuff forever ago), this time just of random symbols that I thought might look good done in the style of painting over the raised part of the wax or etc. :0c Some of them aren't carved deep enough to really show up that well, but overall they worked okay for being clay lol

[yardsards]

"just put it in the same place every time and you won't lose it" 🤝 "just clean everything up immediately after you use it and you'll never have mess pile up": advice that is functionally useless to me as a person with adhd

[aerithisms]

i think my problem with this dw season arc accusing the audience of fanbrain for theorising about ruby is that it both feels deceitful and isn't actually that compelling from a character perspective. the season goes out of its way to build up supernatural mystery around ruby and even invokes susan more heavily than ever before in a way that is deliberately trying to get the audience to make those connections. and then it turns around and says you stupid idiot why would you ever try to connect these dots i have deliberately tried to get you to connect.

building up a mystery only for the character to be ordinary is an impossible girl arc redux only this time accusing the viewer of failing to see the humanity of the companion, whereas the impossible girl arc was turning that accusation on the doctor. 7b didn't really blame the audience for viewing clara as a puzzle and in fact several times spells out the fact that clara is perfectly ordinary before the big reveal to give the audience a chance to catch on. as 7b goes on, instead of laying the mystery on thicker, the audience just gets more and more affirmations that clara is a normal human being (rings of akhaten, journey to the centre of the tardis, hide). i found this approach compelling because it was rooted in character, focusing on the doctor's disconnection from humanity/the gendered dynamic of a man treating a woman as his manic pixie mystery to pull him out of grief. s14's meta approach of accusing the viewer feels both unfair, given it has deliberately led the viewer towards theorising, and personally less compelling to me because it wasn't tied into character in any way.

the thing about rey's parentage in tlj is that the reason rian johnson chose to go for that reveal was that it was the only answer that was interesting. none of the theories - rey is a skywalker, rey is a kenobi, and even the eventually canonical rey is a palpatine - were interesting or satisfying because they brought nothing compelling to the table for the story being told. the only satisfaction to be gained from those answers was a fanbrained "omg rey is important because she's related to that guy from the other movie." on top of that, rey desperately wants her parents to have been important, to give her life and her abandonment some kind of significance. so them being ordinary provided the most compelling trajectory for her character because it was the thing she least wanted to hear. it forced her to do the most introspection and growth, as well as tying into the film's themes about the capacity of ordinary people to be special. it wasn't just a choice made to "gotcha" the viewer, it was rooted in character.

i don't think ruby's mother being ordinary accomplishes the same thing. by invoking susan, s14 is engaging with the most egregious example of the doctor's streak of abandonment, which has potential to be very compelling in relation to ruby (and now also the doctor's) own abandonment issues. theories that ruby might be susan, or be somehow related to susan, or somehow related to the doctor, weren't just fanbrained "omg she's related to that guy i know from the classic series." they were theories genuinely rooted in character and the potential to explore both the doctor and ruby's issues with abandonment. and this is something the show willingly led fans towards by invoking susan so much in the first place. so for the show to turn around and act like they were shallow out of nowhere ideas when they were not shallow and were based on potential character conflicts the show itself deliberately invoked, feels misguided.

as well as that, ruby's mother being ordinary does not require that same growth from ruby as it did for rey because it is exactly what ruby wanted to hear. she never wanted her mother to be important, she just wanted to know who her mother was and have a connection with her. so finding out she was a normal woman who still loves her and wants to be a part of her life is everything she's ever wanted. it doesn't introduce interesting conflict for her the way rey's parents being ordinary did for her, because they were written as different characters with different hangups over their abandonment.

tl;dr i don't necessarily dislike ruby's mother being ordinary as an idea but compared to the things it was inspired by - 7b and star wars - it is not nearly as compelling in terms of how it relates to the characters or themes. and the meta angle, while conceptually interesting, doesn't quite work for me because it feels a little manipulative of the audience.

[dailycupofcreativitea]

Drawing is genuinely the only thing in my life that can push past the giant cloud of "blah" that constitutes my feelings, the only time I can actually get in touch with feelings I normally can't put a finger on, the only thing that makes me feel alive

Genuinely believe I was put on this earth to make art

[skrunksthatwunk]

actually i'm still thinking about the moral orel finale.

he has a cross on his wall. do you know how much i think about that bc it's a lot.

a lot of stories ((auto)biographical or fictional) centering escape from abusive/fundamentalist christianity result in the lead characters leaving behind christianity entirely. and that makes complete sense! people often grow disillusioned with the associated systems and beliefs, and when it was something used to hurt them or something so inseparable from their abuse that they can't engage with it without hurting, it makes total sense that they would disengage entirely. and sometimes they just figure out that they don't really believe in god/a christian god/etc. a healthy deconstruction process can sometimes look like becoming an atheist or converting to another religion. it's all case by case. (note: i'm sure this happens with other religions as well, i'm just most familiar with christian versions of this phenomenon).

but in orel's case, his faith was one of the few things that actually brought him comfort and joy. he loved god, y'know? genuinely. and he felt loved by god and supported by him when he had no one else. and the abuses he faced were in how the people in his life twisted religion to control others, to run away from themselves, to shield them from others, etc. and often, orel's conflicts with how they acted out christianity come as a direct result of his purer understanding of god/jesus/whatever ("aren't we supposed to be like this/do that?" met with an adult's excuse for their own behavior or the fastest way they could think of to get orel to leave them alone (i.e. orel saying i thought we weren't supposed to lie? and clay saying uhhh it doesn't count if you're lying to yourself)). the little guy played catch with god instead of his dad, like.. his faith was real, and his love was real. and i think it's a good choice to have orel maintain something that was so important to him and such a grounding, comforting force in the midst of. All That Stuff Moralton Was Up To/Put Him Through. being all about jesus was not the problem, in orel's case.

and i know i'm mostly assuming that orel ended up in a healthier, less rigid version of christianity, but i feel like that's something that was hinted at a lot through the series, that that's the direction he'd go. when he meditates during the prayer bee and accepts stephanie's different way to communicate, incorporating elements of buddhism into his faith; when he has his I AM A CHURCH breakdown (removing himself from the institution and realizing he can be like,, the center of his own faith? taking a more individualistic approach? but Truly Going Through It at the same time), his acceptance (...sometimes) of those who are different from him and condemned by the adults of moralton (stephanie (lesbian icon stephanie my beloved), christina (who's like. just a slightly different form of fundie protestant from him), dr chosenberg (the jewish doctor from otherton in holy visage)). his track record on this isn't perfect, but it gets better as orel starts maturing and picking up on what an absolute shitfest moralton is. it's all ways of questioning the things he's been taught, and it makes sense that it would lead to a bigger questioning as he puts those pieces together more. anyway i think part of his growth is weeding out all the lost commandments of his upbringing and focusing on what faith means to him, and what he thinks it should mean. how he wants to see the world and how he wants to treat people and what he thinks is okay and right, and looking to religion for guidance in that, not as like. a way to justify hurting those he's afraid or resentful of, as his role models did.

he's coming to his own conclusions rather than obediently, unquestioningly taking in what others say. but he's still listening to pick out the parts that make sense to him. (edit/note: and it's his compassion and his faith that are the primary motivations for this questioning and revisal process, both of individual cases and, eventually, the final boss that is christianity.) it makes perfect sense as the conclusion to his character arc and it fits the overall approach of the show far better. it's good is what i'm saying.

and i think it's important to show that kind of ending, because that's a pretty common and equally valid result of deconstruction. and i think it cements the show's treatment of christianity as something that's often (and maybe even easily) exploited, but not something inherently bad. something that can be very positive, even. guys he even has a dog he's not afraid of loving anymore. he's not afraid of loving anyone more than jesus and i don't think it's because he loves this dog less than bartholomew (though he was probably far more desperate for healthy affection and companionship when he was younger). i think it's because he figures god would want him to love that dog. he's choosing to believe that god would want him to love and to be happy and to be kind. he's not afraid of loving in the wrong way do you know how cool that is he's taking back control he's taking back something he loves from his abusers im so normal

[humming-fly]

heard it was shitty comic day or something so here's a shitty comic of the saddest flatest pond I ever pancaked into at terminal velocity in tears of the kingdom

[pup-pee]

jokes @ night r not funny in the morning,,,

originally the blue was green but then i decided 2 b pan

[murdleandmarot]

@margo-mania ya boy razzle, and a special guest….

(Dude you ate when you created razzle’s backstory, actually insane, 10/10 in terms of themes and motifs and implications, so so good)

[uncanny-tranny]

how do you deal with loving yourself in an age where everybody publicly hates you? i think my internalised transphobia/homophobia is actually killing me

I think first, you have to forgive yourself for not loving or even liking yourself. That may sound counterproductive, but when I actually did this, I felt so much less pressure to perform love and to pretend like I was okay.

This is a process that can take years, and honestly? I still struggle with this. It's not realistic to expect yourself to wake up and be fine. Recognize when you aren't okay, when you feel that self-loathing, and don't feel shame over it (easier said than done, yes, but it is important). What you feel is only natural. What you feel is completely understandable.

Some of the things I have done beyond what I put above are:

Finding a passion outside of anything related to my internalized transphobia/homophobia. For me, this is crafting. It separates me from the world and from myself in such a way that I feel... beyond myself, if that makes sense. It's a liminal space where nothing matters, but what is in front of me

Community. Finding your own place in this world is incredibly important, and it can be difficult. If there is an LGBT center near you, please go there, even if you leave early. Being surrounded by others who are not only similar but you can see can make a difference.

Learning. This one might not work, but I found that education helped me love this world in a way that really helped change my view. I've dabbled in science and history because they're my favourites, but I think learning the beautiful parts of this world can help to make you reflect on how you aren't seperate from this world, you are integral to it.

Make time for yourself. Whatever time you have left, dedicate it to you. What this means, only you can say. For me, I set time for myself to enjoy video games and crafting and being with my cats. This time should be true to what you want to do in order to listen to and honour yourself

In the vein of community: Surround yourself with others like you, with trans and gay and queer people - with a broad spectrum of our communities. Don't tolerate intolerance, and when you come across it, remember your worth and remember that you and your existence aren't debates. You are an actual person. You don't have to entertain the idea that you are anything less.

Remember the world can be kind. The world can (and will) show you kindness, especially where you least expect it. It may seem like the hatred you hear is loud, but louder still will be the people who will see you for you and won't turn away from you.

This isn't a cure-all. I won't peddle magic cures, and I don't want to give the impression that you are "wrong" or "bad" for how you are doing. You aren't the first person to feel this way, and you aren't the only one, either. In that sense, your pain isn't felt alone. I hope that you can feel peace and safety within yourself, if not now, then one day. You are worth that. If you aren't ready for this, please keep all this in your back pocket. It is never too late. It won't be too late.

[kelpiemomma]

One person liked the au comment so here it is:

Concept: people from the rift aren't uncommon. Jubilife and the clans frequently find them and bring them in. In fact, they even fall with all their memories in tact. They know who they are, how they came to be where they went, and where they came from. They know what they were dropped in Hisui to do. The problem is that after some time, some sooner and some later, their memories begin to fade. They remember who they are but they start to think they've always lived in Hisui. They came across with the rest of the jubilife residents, or they were accepted into the clan when they were young and grew up with them. All their memories of where they came warp to suit were they are now. Ingo is one of very few that still knows he is not where he needs to be due to Emmet- he knows there is someone that looks like him that is supposed to be with him, but he is not here. He keeps a hold of his coat and hat because they help remind him to remember something.

Rolling around in my head that, for some reason, Akari is the last to fall. They get a few people a month - one time twenty different people fell at the same time, as if Almighty Sinnoh was desperate that maybe many people would succeed where one couldn't - but their memories were the fastest to flee. They managed to get a lot done, but within the month they could barely recall where they came from.

Akari falls from the rift and after she does the color changes. She's there for a month- memories in tact, no new fallers. Two months- memories in tact, no new fallers. Everyone takes a breath, thinks maybe this is it. Maybe she's The One.

And the memory loss isn't something most people in jubilife bring up. It's depressing, because these people had homes and families and now they are lost in time and memory. Rei fumbles a couple times, mentions "before, when (name) was still helping" or "before (name) forgot." and Akari asks them about the things Rei mentioned but they don't remember. And that's weird but she doesn't think anything of it at first.

Except then things start getting fuzzy. It's after she takes care of Electrode, after she's met and befriended Ingo, after everyone thought she was in the clear. She starts forgetting things. Where she was going. Who she was supposed to meet. More than once Volo has found her and returned her to a campsite, because despite him wanting desperately to meet and defeat Arceus, to be noticed by the god, there is something uncanny and uncomfortable and frightening about people he knew and genuinely cared for forgetting themselves.

Akari struggles to hold on to her memory, lasting longer than the others, but it does fade. It falls to pieces. She stops leaving the village, helping care for the pokemon in the pastures. She doesn't understand why Rei and Laventon, who have always welcomed her so warmly and been so friendly since she first arrived and apprenticed with Marie, are suddenly so sad to see her. Why they don't discuss their research with her like they used to.

And Ingo arrives one day and Akari thinks he looks like a nice person, she may have to go and chat with him. Sure the frown is a little severe but something tells her he'd be comforting...

Except then he walks over to her, greets her, and asks why she hasn't been by for so long. And she's confused, because sure she has her Typhlosion (that she can't remember training) and a lot of the pokemon in the pasture are very affectionate towards her, but she's never been out of Jubilife village. It's scary out there! Wild pokemon are dangerous! (Even though her partner could easily one-shot many of them...)

And it's Ingo who realizes something is incredibly wrong. Because he remembers Akari, how excited she was to learn more about pokemon, how she loved getting rides from Sneasler and Wyrdeer over the highlands, how she delighted in making Melli feel bad for bullying her.

And Ingo realizes she's not the first to stop showing up in the highlands, he just wasn't as attached to anyone else. There are faces he recognizes in the village, faces of people who - at one point - were filling the Pokedex, were exploring the territory, were helping the nobles. Akari was not the first, he just wasn't close enough to any of the others to take notice that their disappearance from the Highlands wasn't retirement or injury, it was something worse.

And he excuses himself, heads back home, and stares at himself in the mirror, because something is off. Something has always been off but now he knows. now there is proof. And he tries to think about who he might be, why he knows something he is pretty certain he shouldn't. And decides the best vourse of action, to figure out what's going on, is to stop sitting around as a warden. He's going to calm the last noble. He's going to figure this out so whatever has happened will stop and people can go back home.

[ynwa4eva]

You know ive grown so much this past year... Decided on and went to uni, passed every exam, lived on my own for a few months, became a better friend, my buzz cut grew out and im taking care of my curly hair, reduced my skin care routine and stopped picking my skin, my legs dont look dead anymore because i take care of the ingrown hairs problem... Ive read TWO BOOKS, watched absolute BANGERS of football matches!!!

[sapphorror]

Okay but my favorite GIR moments are ALWAYS the ones that imply he's just aware enough of what's going on to know that the thing he's doing will fuck up Zim's day, and he still does it anyway, possibly specifically for that purpose.

[anotherpapercut]

I agree that drugs should be legalised and not stigmatized but you're delusional if you think "most drugs can be consumed completely safely with almost 0 risk to the user"

I think the key here is the word "can" by which I mean that if consumed in safe doses and safe environments and from safe sources etc most like mainstream drugs (I'm thinking of like mdma, LSD, shrooms, ketamine, coke) CAN be consumed safely with very little risks. I know this to be a fact #1. because I've done a lot of actual research on this where I've read numerous sources from scientists doctors and users as opposed to just say taking in the abstinence only information I received during school, reading a couple Tumblr posts and assuming I know everything there is to know about the topic and #2 I've used every drug I just listed and more and never suffered any adverse effects because I did my research, tested them for impurities when appropriate, and took other measures to ensure my safety

there are obviously exceptions and drugs that just shouldn't be fucked with (meth and heroin is what I'm thinking, but I also know people who have consumed these once or twice with 0 repercussions because that's how human experience works), but if you're actually interested in learning more about the many ways in which you were lied to about how "illegal drugs" are somehow automatically much worse for you than prescription drugs or socially acceptable drugs (like caffeine and alcohol) then feel free to either 1. do your own ACTUAL research that does not involve trusting for profit rehab centers and abstinence only educators (I'll even get you started with a couple good resources) or 2. message me off anon to have a real discussion about the mechanisms by which the most common drugs operate and the ways in which they can be consumed as safely as you can consume alcohol cigarettes and energy drinks but sending me your half cocked uninformed and unnecessarily insulting opinion on anon is not exactly productive. additionally, I'm sure you can see why I struggle to see or believe that you ACTUALLY think drugs should be destigmatized and aren't just parroting what you think the correct woke opinion is when you refuse to even take the very first step to destigmatizing drugs, drug use, and drug users and actually unlearn all the stigmatizing things you've been taught

I know that it's a lot easier just to port over all the things you've learned from dubious sources that you trusted implicitly because they claimed to be an authority and not actually do the work required to achieve the goals you claim to support, but easier doesn't mean right

[rubberduckyrye]

I feel like people give Shuichi a lot of shit for not noticing Kaede's behavior since he's a detective and like

Bro she wasn't being as obvious about her intentions as you guys think