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close to you | l.n
summary: chemical override, ultraviolet, you could be mine tonight ; or having a crush is mind boggling, soul crushing and confusing, but also so exciting at the same time.
warnings: inspired by close to you by gracie abrams, friends to lovers (bc it’s my brand), pining, all the feels, reader is childhood best friends with pietra, fluff, and some language here and there
jordans notes: hi everyone! long time no see (😅) i’m slowly getting back into writing, school has been kicking my ass. i don’t think this is my best work, but i really wanted to get something out for you guys since ive been gone so long! i promise there’s more to come than just this! i hope you all are well!! sending you all my love 🤍
masterlist | listen to the playlist
before you met him, you didn’t think about the color green too often. it was one of those colors you didn’t necessarily love or hate, it was just kind of… there.
to you, it was just one of those colors where shades of it were prettier than the actual color itself. or a color you only really liked during the fall. like how, typically, people only liked the color blue during the summer.
that was until you met him.
the boy with those big, beautiful, slightly blue but slightly green, water-colored eyes. now you love the color green. obsessed over it. thought about it every second of every day. it was crazy how a simple opinion could change in a matter of seconds, all because of those stupidly pretty eyes.
You lie awake on your back, staring at the ceiling. surely it wasn’t normal to obsess over someone this much, right? especially over someone you weren’t even sure would ever feel the same.
sure, you had crushes before, and had your fair share of falling quickly and all at once. it wasn’t an unusual feeling to you, no stranger to catching feelings rather quickly.
but this time around, everything was different. everything felt more intense, more mind-boggling and confusing and pulse rising. the feeling so foreign that sometimes you wish you had never met him so you wouldn’t have fallen so hard so sudden, but deep down you were so glad that you had.
it was the little things that made you wonder what it was like to be loved by him. the subtle glances in your direction, the gentle but lingering touches. you had thought you were going crazy, reading too much into things in the beginning. over-analyzing every little thing that made your body light up with excitement.
until pietra confirmed your suspicions.
“he’s totally into you,” she said, leaning closer to your ear as you watched him from across the room, his head tilted back, nose scrunched and eyes half shut as he laughed about something max had said, which was likely something stupid, “like, one hundred percent, down bad, into you.”
you tilted your head at the blonde, “you think so?”
she scoffed, “more like know so,”
“who told you?”
“no one has to tell me anything,” she said, “i can just tell.”
you rolled your eyes at her, “p, i’ve told you a million times, he’s not into me.”
but she was right. he was one hundred percent, undoubtedly, down. fucking. bad.
ever since the moment he met you at that stupid pub with max and his group of friends, all he wanted to do was get to know you. he didn’t want it to seem obvious when he asked max about you, but he knew no matter what he did it was going to seem obvious. just from the way he looked at you like you hung the stars in the night sky, he was no where near subtle.
he hated to admit it, but he had even done some lowkey instagram stalking through one of his private accounts. he had seen all the pictures of you and pietra, a life long friendship explained to him in front of his own eyes.
and every time his fingers would swipe through your account, all he could think about was how beautiful you were. how your eyes sparkled every time you smiled for the camera, how happy you looked when you genuinely laughed, and how he wished to be the reason behind the gorgeous sound forever.
he wasn’t trying to make it obvious tonight, not wanting to make it well known that he had his eyes on you for a while. but he had lost track at the amount of times you had caught him looking at you, and he swore he had even caught you looking at him first a handful of times.
so when everyone in the house decided that it was the end of the night and started filing through the door, he took it upon himself to make his way over to you. you were talking with pietra, a smile on your face as you giggled about something she had said. the brazilian woman’s eyes landed on him, to which she looked back at you and said something before you turned to look in his direction.
he smiled when your eyes met his, “hey, did you need a ride home?”
your heart threatened to leap out of your chest, “uhm, i was just gonna call an uber, you don’t have to-“
“no, no,” he said, shaking his head, “i insist, really. it’s not a big deal.”
how could you argue with him? those pretty green eyes, that smile, the face. you simply couldn’t. it was impossible. you couldn’t see the look pietra was giving you, but knowing her, you knew it was a look that said ‘go with him’.
and do you did, the cool, crisp autumn air in london suddenly making you wish you had brought a jacket. you had wished you planned for the nightly breeze, wishing you had opted for a long-sleeved shirt for the night instead of the spaghetti strap tank top you had chosen.
as you walked to the car that was parked down the street, he noticed you shivering. he saw the way you hugged yourself, your hair moving with the breeze. his curls danced in the wind and he knew if he was slightly cold, you were definitely freezing.
he tugged off the hoodie before passing it to you, the sound of the doors to the mclaren echoing before he turned to you.
“here,” he said, “it’s a little windy out, i know you’re probably freezing.”
your stomach did backflips as you took the soft black material from his hands, “oh, are you sure? aren’t you cold?”
he sent you a shrug, “i’ll live,”
there was no use arguing with him, so instead you sent him another smile in appreciation before tugging the sweatshirt over your head. it was already warm from hugging his body, and you couldn't help the way the smell of his cologne lingered in the soft material. you had to keep yourself from burying yourself in it, the feeling of being close to him without actually being close to him sending butterflies to your stomach.
the car ride was filled with comfortable silence, music softly playing in the background. he stole occasional looks over at your figure as you looked out the window, the neck of his hoodie pulled up to your face as you watched the street lights pass by. you looked beautiful in the dim light, he couldn’t help himself.
he thought about taking the long way to your house. a simple but effective way to be able to spend more time with you. however, the thought of you being confused and questioning his actions was enough for him to stay straight at the stop light instead of taking a right for the longer way.
he tried not to look disappointed when he reached your house, parking in front of it. he wondered if your roommates were home, if you’d tell them about the fact that he drove you home.
he turned the engine off, unclicking his seatbelt, “i’ll walk you up.”
you nodded, the both of you getting out of the car and walking through the dewy grass up to the wooden door. you fished for your keys in your purse, putting them into the lock before turning to look at him, “thanks for the ride,”
“anytime,” he smiled. he meant it. and you knew he meant it. he’d come get you at anytime of the day, wether it was early in the morning or late at night, he was always going to show up.
you stood there, eyes searching his face. he was so pretty to you, the brown curls that were slowly growing into a mullet to the sparkling eyes that you loved so much. the dimples in his cheeks that appeared whenever he smiled, the slight facial hair he had managed to grow, but your favorite part was the moles and freckles that covered his skin. the ones he had once complained about, but you loved the way they scattered his skin.
you dreamt of kissing each and every single one of them.
“hey, lando! long time no see!”
you both averted your attention, neither of you hearing the door open behind you. in the doorway stood your dark haired roommate, faith.
“hey,” he smiled softly, trying once again to not look disappointed from the way your moment was interrupted.
“we’re having drinks and watching movies if you wanted to join,” she smiled, ignoring the look you were sending her way.
“oh, uhm,” he started, not sure how to answer, “it’s getting kinda late, i dunno-“
“you can crash in y/n’s room, im sure she wouldn’t mind.”
what was that supposed to mean?
you looked over at him, “you don’t have to stay-“
“he’s been gone for weeks, he’s legally obligated,” she said, reaching from the doorway and grabbing both of your arms, “c’mon, liv is making martinis.”
you sighed heavily and he laughed softly at your protest that went unnoticed by her. your other roommate, olivia, stood in the kitchen.
“look who i found!” faith exclaimed excitedly.
“oh, hey guys! just in time,” she smiled, “it’s martini and movie friday!”
lando leaned over to you as the other two talked, “they do this every friday?”
you sighed again, nodding, “unfortunately,” you turned to your roommates, “we’re gonna head up to my room, actually,”
you led lando to the stairs, ignoring the playful teasing from the girls in the kitchen, “oooh!!”
“up to your room, huh?”
you shook your head, opening your bedroom door and letting him in before closing it, “‘m sorry for them, they’re… how do i put this?”
“a lot?” he asked, a smile playing at his lips.
“yeah, we can put it that way.”
he chuckled, sitting down on the bed as you put your things down. he looked around your bedroom, not much had changed since the last time he had been in it. the fairy lights dimly lit up the room, photos littered the walls. the desk that sat in the corner of the room kept your makeup bag and brushes, a mirror sitting in the middle.
he looked at your nightstand, a picture of you, him, max and pietra sitting on the wooden surface. it was a picture from miami, smiles on all of your faces. you stood in the middle, arm wrapped around his middle as you smiled for the camera, his trophy in the hand that wasn’t wrapped around your middle.
“i’m gonna change,” you said, “i might have a pair of your sweatpants somewhere if you wanted to change.”
he nodded, “yeah, that’d be great.”
you turned back to the dresser, opening drawers in search for the pair of sweatpants he leant you one day. the same day he picked you up from the failed date. the one that left you crying outside, swearing up and down that you’d never find love. despite it being in front of you this entire time.
finally finding the black material, you handed them to him, “i meant to give them back, but i just haven’t seen you,”
he shook his head. you could’ve kept them forever and he wouldn’t have minded one bit, “it’s alright,”
you grabbed your pajama bottoms from the foot of the bed, “be right back.”
he changed into the sweatpants while you were gone, still looking around your room. he smiled at the picture of you and your roommates, clearly taken at a party. you wore the prettiest smile he had ever seen, dressed in a black off the shoulder top. it was from the same night he realized he liked you in more than just a friendly way.
the door opening brought him back to reality, his eyes landing on your figure and how you were still wearing the black hoodie he had given you earlier. it brought a small smile to his face.
you noticed his eyes on you, looking down at the black hoodie, “i swear i’ll give it back once i wash it.”
he laughed softly, shaking his head, “it’s okay. it looks better on you anyways.”
you smiled, fighting the heat that was rising your cheeks but it was no use. he joined you on the bed, watching as you flipped through different things on netflix.
“you don’t have to stay, y’know,” you said, looking over at him, “if you have better things to do..”
“i don’t,” he said, turning his head to look your way, “in all honesty, there’s no where else i’d rather be.”
you sucked in a breath, your eyes dancing across his face once again. it was hard for you not to stare, not when he looked so pretty like this. back pressed against your headboard, hair slightly messy, and he looked so cozy. it made you want to wrap yourself around him, lay your head on his chest.
he did the same, his eyes scanning your face like he was trying to memorize every single feature, every single imperfection that he thought was still perfect. the same ones you’d argue about, but he still always found adorable.
his voice broke the comfortable silence that had fallen between the two of you, “do you ever have something to say but can’t find the words to say it?”
your furrowed your eyebrows, “like?”
he licked his lips, his attention now fixed on his hands as he fiddled with the ring on his middle finger. you never thought he’d be the type to get shy, almost embarrassed as his cheeks turned a light shade of pink.
“like, i dunno,” he mumbled, “i just.. i don’t know how to put it, but ever since the moment we met, i’ve found myself just.. thinking about you. thinking about what it’d be like to cross this weird, thin, little line we’ve drawn. if we both just said ‘fuck it’ and dove head first into whatever uncharted territory we’re tiptoeing around.”
his eyes met yours again as he let out a nervous breath. you hadn’t realized you had been holding yours, shock clearly written on your face which made him shake his head.
“never mind, it’s dumb-“
“lando,”
“- i knew i shouldn’t have listened to what max was going on about-“
you rolled your eyes as he kept blabbering away, talking nonsense. your body moving before your brain could comprehend what you were about to do, only catching up when your hands met his jaw and you were suddenly catching yourself a mere few inches from his face.
it was too late now, no going back.
you pulled his face closer to yours, his blabbering coming to a halt when you pressed your lips to his. his brain short circuited, you pulling away before he had the chance to kiss you back.
“‘m sorry,” you immediately apologized, “i don’t know why i did-“
it was his turn to cut you off now, grabbing your chin and pulling you back to his lips. his thumb traced along your jaw, his pointer finger sitting underneath your chin.
you kissed him back after a second of surprise, letting his free hand reach down to grab your hip, pulling you on top of his lap. your hands threaded through his curls, nails scratching his scalp.
when you both finally pulled away, all you could do was smile. giggles and chuckles echoing through the room as you both sat breathless, his nose bumping yours as he tucked a piece of stray hair away from your face.
“so we’re in agreement then, huh?” he asked.
“isn’t that obvious?” you smiled and he shook his head, letting out another boyish laugh.
“how long have you.. y’know, had feelings for me, i guess?”
“since the minute i saw you,” he confessed, “you were the most beautiful girl in the room, a smile that would make everyone stop and stare. it’s always been you, i’ve just been too scared to tell you.”
you smiled again, heart fluttering in your chest. all the dreams and wishes you spent with him on your mind, it was all finally paying off, “it’s always been you for me, too. i thought i had been way too obvious, but clearly i wasn’t obvious enough.”
“we were both too oblivious,” he said, moving more hair from your face, “but it’s okay, we’re here now.”
you were convinced your smile was never going to be wiped off your face, “kiss me again,”
“with pleasure,” he mumbled, lips finding yours once more as you melted into him.
#lando norris#lando norris x reader#ln4 x reader#fluff#ln4#ln4 imagine#ln4 fluff#lando norris x reader fluff#lando norris x reader imagine#lando norris x reader fluff imagine#lando norris fluff imagine#lando norris fluff#lando norris fluff x reader#ln4 fic#ln4 x y/n#ln4 x you#ln4 one shot#ln4 fluff x reader#ln4 x reader fluff#ln4 x reader imagine#ln4 x reader fic#mclaren#mclaren f1#mclaren formula 1#mclaren formula one#formula 1#formula one#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris fanfic
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| pairing: sub!nerd!Mark x Dom!Reader
| warnings: 18+ MDNI. Jerking him off. Oral. Slight edging. I'm like a broken record when it comes to writing about sucking Mark off, my b <3
| wc: 2.3k
Sometimes the best way for Mark to study was with an incentive system— A way for him to earn rewards if he did his work. He had a habit of getting disinterested in his work easily because you were a fantastic distraction from his textbooks, even if you weren’t doing a single thing aside from lounging on the couch in pajamas. Mark just… he couldn’t care less about anything else whenever you were around. You were his everything. But to you, his studies should have been his everything because he was so close to getting his master’s, it was stupid of him to throw that all away just because he couldn’t keep his hands to himself. So you figured out when finals season approached and Mark was constantly throwing his work to the side to make out with you that if you gave him rewards for studying, Mark was eager to speed through his flashcards, textbooks, homework, and so on.
“When you’re done with your lab report, I’ll blow you.”
“When you’ve reviewed your final draft for your philosophy essay, you can kiss me.”
“Once you make your own comment on the assignment of the week, I’ll sit on your lap while you reply to two of your classmates’ comments.”
Mark had always been a good student, but somehow his grades were doing even better ever since you started the incentive idea. You were having to slow him down and stall on his rewards because, like a dog in training, he figured out that if he was a good student then you would touch him, so he was doing too much at once just for the chance to get your mouth on his cock, or even the opportunity to be inside of you. Usually he only got to fuck you after big projects worth about 20% of his grade… But since it was finals season, Mark was more worked up than usual, and he was incredibly stressed, so he was eager for more and more and more—
“I can’t keep doing this, baby, I’m too tired,” he whined, hiding his face in his hands before diving face-first against his open textbook. “If I have to read one more thing about how arteries work, I’m going to start tearing my hair out. Like, who doesn’t know this already! Why do I have to read seven chapters about bullshit I learned in high school!”
“How much more do you have left?” you asked, setting your phone to the side and sitting up on the couch.
“Two more chapters.”
“That’s nothing,” you whined back mockingly.
Mark lifted his head so that he could show you his pouting bottom lip and those big puppy-dog eyes behind his glasses. Why did you have to fall in love with a hot nerd, huh? A nerd would have sufficed. Or a hot jock. But a hot nerd was your kryptonite, and even though you knew he was baiting you to get what he wanted, there was no denying that he was irresistible when he was wearing his glasses, his hair long was a mess, and his pajamas were shifting around just enough to let you see the outline of his abs under his shirt and his cock in his pants. Ugh, he knew how to get you.
“Finish this chapter first,” you said, hoping to buy yourself some time.
Mark perked up thanks to the mysterious hope you’d provided him. His eyes began scanning the chapter at the normal, quick pace you were familiar with when he wasn’t protesting the idea of studying; and in the meantime, you pushed yourself off the couch and walked towards Mark. He hesitated briefly, but his gaze didn’t leave the textbook. He warily flipped the page, revealing that he was on the last few paragraphs before the next chapter. You watched over his shoulder to put some pressure on him to actually read and not just fuck around because even though you weren’t a nerd like him, you’d learned enough during his “rewards” to catch on whenever he was lying about doing his work just to get what he wanted.
“Done,” he cheered victoriously.
“How long’s the next chapter?”
Mark flipped a few pages in search of the chapter he didn’t have to read for homework. Six pages later, he found it and pointed.
“You think you can last ‘til then?”
Mark looked confused. “For what?”
With a wicked grin, you dropped down to your knees then crawled under the dining room table where Mark had set up shop with all of his study material in preparation for finals. You were having to eat meals on the couch since there was no room at the table anymore.
“Read the chapter aloud so I know you’re not lying,” you told him casually as you pried his knees apart to make room for yourself to settle between his legs. Mark leaned back so that he could watch you for a moment. “Don’t lose track of your spot either.”
As you grabbed the hem of his pajama pants, Mark aided your attempt to undress him by lifting his hips so that you could pull the fabric down, then he resettled on the wooden chair. Mark wasn’t unfamiliar with being naked on that chair— You liked to tie his hands behind his back and have him sit on that chair while you rode him until his head was spinning and he couldn’t get out a single word.
When you wrapped your hand around his length, Mark gulped, but he remembered what you wanted him to do in order to earn his reward, so he leaned forward again to put his focus on the last chapter of the night. You didn’t do anything to distract him for a bit. Despite his growing eagerness as shown by his hardening cock in your hand, you didn’t move or do something new— So Mark began reading the chapter aloud. Honestly, you weren’t paying attention. A lot of the science shit he studied went over your head, so even though you heard the words and learned a thing or two here and there, you never really… absorbed everything like he did…
Mark concentrated on the words in front of him, and as he began the next paragraph, that was when you began slowly pumping your hand up and down his long dick. He moaned suddenly. His ability to keep reading coherently faded, so you stopped your motions. Mark immediately bucked his hips upward to encourage you to keep going, but so long as he wasn’t studying, you weren’t going to give him his reward. When he recuperated, Mark slowly started reading again… You took a moment to believe him that he was actually ready, then you continued when you were doing. Mark moaned, but before you could stop again, he raced to keep reading at a faster pace, likely in the hopes that you would put him in your mouth or ride him, or let him fuck you…
Your tongue flicked Mark’s tip suddenly. The words of the textbook got caught in his throat, and within an instant he was leaning back to look down at you, his glasses hanging low on the bridge of his nose. You stopped to look up at him. He whined at the lack of stimulation, but you grinned while cocking your head to the side, waiting for him to say something, to admit that he wanted more, or perhaps he would silently return to his work. In fact, that was what he did. He read the next line casually to give you time to get back to what you were doing. Two lines later, you caught him off guard by sucking him off again, your tongue swirling around his tip, your fingers playing with his base and even teasing his balls a bit to really get him worked up.
The third page turn marked him reaching the halfway point of the chapter without any more issues. He did his best to ignore you so that he could focus on his work, despite the fact that you were slowly working his cock towards an orgasm which you didn’t plan on giving him quite yet. He knew that. He read as fast as he could in order to complete the assignment sooner, but every time he fucked up a word or lost his place in the paragraphs, you paused to give him a chance to figure out how to reset. Unfortunately, whenever you stopped, you also edged him. He hated that. But you loved how cute he sounded when he was all submissive and desperate.
By the fifth page, Mark was losing it. He was stuttering through every word, moaning between sentences, begging for more at the end of paragraphs. You tried to show him a little bit of mercy by going slower so that you didn’t have to edge him as often, but even that couldn’t really help Mark. Poor thing. Before you, he didn’t have a lot of experience— A personal choice until he met you. He’d only kissed a guy, some friend of his, and one girl in middle school; and he fully intended on never thinking about dating again until after his PhD when he could think about getting married. However, he saw you in his ethics class, a required course which he was less than excited to be attending instead of the courses required for his master’s degree, and once he laid eyes on you, he knew that he had to have you, but there was one thing in his way. He definitely didn’t deserve you. The fact that you were so gorgeous and perfect and amazing and— Mark couldn’t believe that someone like you would look twice in his direction. What he failed to recognize, though, was that he was actually way out of your league, according to you, so you couldn’t believe that someone as handsome as Mark Lee would even glance at you.
Now there the two of you were, moved in together, happily dating, supporting each other through your degrees, and even teasing the idea of marriage whenever Mark got really sappy during cuddle-time late at night. His experience obviously grew in that time too. Mark liked to experiment with his sexuality, and that led him to discovering that he liked being submissive from time to time, especially when it came to things like rewards and punishments— Having structure in his life provided by someone else gave him comfort.
“Can I cum?” he asked suddenly.
You pulled off of him.
“Wait, wait, please, don’t stop—”
“You have to finish the chapter first.”
Mark shuddered. “I can’t.”
“Yes, you can. I believe in you, baby.”
He swallowed a moan then continued reading. Something, something, arteries, something, something, blood, something— “I’m close! No, no, no…” His knuckles turned white as his fists tightened when you edged him again. Something, something… Nutrients… Something… Hormones… “Okay, I’m done, I finished, please!”
Sitting up on your knees slightly, you were able to angle yourself better to sink your mouth down over his tip while your hand continued to jerk off the first few inches down at his base. Mark grabbed your hair to hold onto something for balance. He didn’t push you down or buck upwards. He just let you take the lead while he used you to keep himself sane. Slowly, you swallowed every inch until there was no more room for your hand, and you could feel him tickling the back of your throat, which was uncomfortable just enough to cause you to go back up. Mark moaned with relief. Feeling your cheeks hollow out, your tongue dragging along his length, and your saliva coating every inch of him made his eyes roll behind those handsome glasses of his.
“Can I cum?” he begged desperately.
“Yeah,” you mumbled before sinking back down.
Mark squirmed, his tip hitting the inside of your wet cheek, then he thrusted upwards until he hit the back of your throat again, and even though you gagged a bit, he moaned and started cumming. He panted breathlessly through it. There wasn’t a lot since you’d drained him throughout the past couple of days, but the orgasm was strong enough that he threw his head back and clenched his thighs around your shoulders.
“F-feels so good… Fuck… Thank you… Thank you…”
As his orgasm passed, he slumped in the chair. You allowed him a minute to catch his breath while you also used that time to swallow every drop he gave you while also trying to regain your composure.
“Fuck, I’ve got a headache now.” Mark reached to help you to your feet.
You kissed his forehead. “Take a break from studying, then, we’ll get some rest for a bit.” You continued to hold his hands as you pulled him to his feet too then calmly led him to the bedroom. Mark crashed on the bed in an instant. “Gotta take these off first, babe.” You carefully slid his glasses off his face and set them on his bedside table. “There you go.”
Mark grabbed your waist and pulled you on top of him to cuddle close and nuzzle his face in the crook of your neck lovingly. “Do you think I’m going to pass my bio exam?”
“You’re studying more often than not, so, yes.”
He chuckled. “You’re biased.”
“Then why’d you ask me, silly?”
Mark squeezed you tight and rolled over so that you were laying beside him, giving you ample room to squeeze him back. “Thank you,” he said. “You’ve helped me a lot this semester.”
You kissed the top of his head and played with the end of his long hair that laid against the back of his neck. “Any time.”
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#op#fanfic#mark#mark lee#mark lee smut#mark fanfic#mark lee fanfic#mark smut#nct#nct smut#nct fanfic#nct 127#nct 127 fanfic#nct 127 smut#nct dream#nct dream fanfic#nct dream smut
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yandere, 18+
I know I write about this kind of stuff a lot, but there’s just something about men humping inanimate objects that just really gets to me.
It’s the desperation that they can't control. It's the physical urge to move, to feel something underneath them, their body physically unable to stop itself from fucking something. It's the way their hips snap and buck and jolt all without them meaning it, their body betraying them on the most primal level because their subconscious is recognizing that they need something warm and soft and oh so pretty to sink into, to rut against until he's smearing pearls of white against soft, supple skin. It's the uncontrollable need to hump themselves against you, really.
Fucking their fist and mechanically bringing their wrist up and down again and again until cum oozes from the tip is fine and dandy, but they need more. They need the full immersion of the fantasy of fucking you, their brain needing the mental images and the physical motions of thrusting, pretending with every fiber of their being that its your warm, wet cunt sucking them in, the velvety feel of your walls leaving phantom touches against his skin.
(Some of them even go so far as to scratch at their own back, eyes rolling to the back of their head imagining that it’s you leaving your mark on him, that it’s your nails digging into his skin and digging into him, making him yours yours yours. They'll pinch at their own nipples, press fingertips hard against their biceps, even wrap a hand around his neck hard enough to leave the area red and irritated just to simulate the way that you'd touch him.)
Pillows, cushions, blankets, anything soft that could be a poor stand-in for your body is fine. Anything that he can clutch onto, that he can press his hips against tightly enough to be suffocating, something that can mold to the shape of him just as you would - all just to really feel like he’s got every single inch stuffed inside of you, giving everything he possibly can to you.
Even hard things will do in a pinch - perhaps the cover of a book you love and cherish, the texture of the binding leaving a slightly painful sting behind that blends into the pleasure and makes his eyes roll back. (Will you still smell the pages and sigh at that old-book smell, or will you perhaps notice the new presence of something slightly musky, slightly heavy, unexplainably male?) Your hairbrush - rutting against the handle he knows you’ve fucked your self with, alternating between rutting against it and bringing it up to his mouth to suck on, eyes squeezed shut as he tried to taste any traces of you.
The only rule is that it has to be something of yours, or something that connects to you in some way. Your pillow, a few wayward strands of your hair sitting against the plush, feeling like heaven and making him blush when he sees the way his sticky cum has left the hairs smeared again his skin, tacky and stuck to him. (The sight makes him suck in his breath, gulping harshly as he comes down from his high, a thumb coming out to carefully, nervously brush at the hair, unable to stop himself from feeling like the sight is somehow so very right.)
It’s better when things are stained - your underwear with discharge discoloration bleaching the fabric, your favorite skirt that you accidentally stained during your period, even a particular pair of socks that you once got dirt on. It’s been used and loved by you, and now he’ll use and love it, too, even leaving his very own stain behind.
There’s just something about it that makes everything feel better, more complete, more real. Of course nothing will ever compare to actually fucking you, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
And of course, the pinnacle, when he really gets desperate, is when he whips out one of the many, many photographs he's taken of you. (Or, photos he'd printed out from your social media accounts because he's too shy to actually photograph you - and this is less creepy, right? Right?) He's touching it with delicate fingers, barely pinching onto the corners, laying the image down on his bed and positioning himself to be right over it. He'll take his time to trace the outline of your face with the tip, sighing and biting his lip, before the urge takes over and soon he's groaning, hips rutting against the smooth surface of the photograph - your face, really.
(The cool feeling and the twinge of pain he gets when he angles wrong and catches the edge of the photograph only makes him grit his teeth, eyes squeezing shut harder because he has to do this - he has to keep fucking, to keep pushing himself because he needs to come for you, you deserve and he wants to give it to you so badly and oh oh oh - The photograph of you smiling is almost prettier with globs of his cum staining your pearly teeth and the apples of your cheeks.)
It's just so depraved, but they can't help it - they just want you so badly that they can't help it.
(In particular I'm thinking of the chronic humpers - Kageyama, who gets so, so whiny, his voice going high and pitchy and his face turning a bright pink color as his abs clench and flex, each drag of his hips making his arms shake even more, sweat beading at his temple leaving his dark hair matted to his forehead.
Or Sugawara, who tends to lay onto his back, humping at the pillow from underneath, pressing the cotton so hard against his pelvis that his biceps are taut, back arching and Adam's Apple bobbing as he chants yes yes yes under his breath, one hand even coming up to blindly grope and squeeze at the air where he imagines your bouncing tits to be.
Or Giyuu, who's thrusts start out slow, hesitant, embarrassed, as if he can't believe he's been reduced to his, worried to sully your good name. But then his hips get faster and he's burying his face into the crook of his elbow, whispering out a stuttered, broken p-please accompanied by your name as he cum seeps into the pillow material.
Or Tomura, who has all the fancy sex toys in the world that he's found on the deepest, most questionable parts of the internet, but finds that nothing is a good stand in aside from your pillow. He starts off animalistic, mounting the pillow and smacking at it, imagining the way your pretty ass would bounce back and ripple at the motion. But then his orgasm draws closer and the thrusts get deeper, more meaningful, like he's trying to reach as deeply inside of you as possible, and his grip is almost unbearably tight as his orgasm washes over him, hips quivering and twitching as he imagines the way you'd clutch onto him and thank him.
Or Feitan, who's biting into the pillow as he cock drags against it, teeth bared and practically snarling into the (stained) cotton, dark eyes squeezed shut as he tries so very hard to not whine your name.
Or even, on very, very specific occasions, Chrollo, whose sense of dignity flies out the window when you deny his romantic advances once again. You're just playing so very hard to get, and while he's invested into the game for the long run, he's still just a man - and the image of you spread out underneath him, wearing lacy, angelic lingerie and spreading those creamy, supple thighs of yours is enough to drive him mad.
It's just pathetic enough to be sweet, really, and although you aren't exactly flattered when you walk in on him heatedly grunting your name with the pillow tightly clutched between his thighs, just know he's doing it for you. Everything he does is for you.
#_lee rambles#_kny#_bnha#_hxh#_haikyuu#yandere kny#yandere bnha#yandere hxh#yandere haikyuu#haikyuu smut#kny smut#hxh smut#bnha smut
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[since everything under a Read More cut gets deleted in case a blog deletes/gets deleted and the WayBackMachine isn’t good with pictures, for Archive Purposes Only, I will add the most important bits of the/rest of the full post and have also checked/updated/added the source links to the best of my abilities]
"From [North] America, they traveled to Australia and New Zealand, then back to the U.S. again. They didn’t have extended time in the U.K. until the end of April (when they were likely writing/recording Take Me Home, as well as rehearsing for their continuing Up All Night tour).
In the gifs above, OT5 are pictured at a Much Music interview from May 2012, unavailable to view [I have added the video link. Btw, at 16:06 there is another very interesting moment where they start talking about Larry Stylinson and Liam says "It's true!"] —the one with the two red tables, where the interviewer asks about boys kissing, and Niall’s wearing a lavender t-shirt and backwards snapback.
Interviewer: “How do you balance [making an album] with how busy you are, and all these concert dates?” Harry shrugs, “You tell us!” Louis says, “We ask ourselves the same question!” Interviewer: “You already have nearly a hundred shows confirmed and almost sold out—for 2013. How do you plan your lives that far in advance?” Harry and Liam laugh, “We don’t!” Louis says, “We wish we did!” [I added the video link]
In Florida during the Up All Night tour in [July] 2012, Niall comments that he spent "30 days at home [in 2011]. So, that's a big difference from 365..." [link to whole interview video]
–––––
Q: Many of these groups get huge but burn out after three or so years. What’s your plan to make sure that doesn’t happen?
Simon Cowell: “Be sensible and treat them as human beings, genuinely. That’s the most important thing. Traditionally, record companies would put out the most possible product in a short period of time, thinking you only have two or three years. I don’t think that’s necessarily the case now. If you’re sensible and you don’t burn them out, you don’t have to put a time limit on this anymore. And they’re so young, these guys.”
Rolling Stone Q&A with Simon Cowell (by Andy Greene, April 2012, emphasis mine)
–––––
“I’ve never known a band to announce a second summer tour before a first summer tour is over. It’s insane – they’re working them like dogs and printing money right now.” — Andy Greene, May 2012
During This Is Us promo in August 2013, Harry says, "If we could choose the perfect scenario, I would be 'the well-rested one.' "
–––––
Simon Cowell, 2015: “This is five years, literally non-stop. I’m amazed they’ve done it for so long… I hope [they’ll get back together], but like I said, it’s not going to be because of any pressure from me… like we said in the beginning, this is an opportunity, you won it, and I’ve always had that attitude with them…. Look, even though they’re young, that is a gruelling schedule and after a while I could see they were exhausted, so when they said, “How do you feel about it?” I said, “Do whatever you want.” Having a year off is going to be a healthy thing.’
Also during This is Us promo, during one of their multiple press conferences, [in August 2013] a reporter asks, "Did you have a choice to say no to this documentary?" Harry half-shakes his head, and leans in to speak. Niall almost imperceptibly shakes his head, and tightens his mouth.
––––––
Niall, October 2012: I've a re-occurring knee injury from playing football. I've dislocated my knee ten times in the last two years. Operation time for me.
So are you gonna have to go and get an operation done? When?
Niall: (shrugs) Whenever I have time. ...[come up with] a couple years. (Late Late Show, October 2012)
14 months later, January 2014: after performing 123 shows during the Take Me Home tour (only a portion of his responsibilities during that time), 20-year-old Niall had major knee surgery that was 'much larger than anticipated'. He began a new tour with One Direction about three months later, after One Direction’s first extended break since forming as a group.
––––––
From January 2011 – December 2015, One Direction:
• wrote for and recorded 5 albums (91 songs included on the albums)
• performed 327 full concerts as headliners during four tours (on the road for about 110 weeks total)
• were interviewed more than 800 times by various media
• performed at least 97 times on television
• visited at least 37 countries, often more than once
• walked some 33 red carpets
• filmed 18 music videos (at least 36 days’ work)
• filmed well over 100 additional miscellaneous videos
• had at least 29 photo shoots
• shot a feature-film ‘documentary,’ with cameras trailing them for months
• shot concert films for the Up All Night and Where We Are tours
Just one week of heavy promo for the feature-film This is Us in August 2013 included:
approximately 95 junket interviews appearance at the VMAs appearance at America’s Got Talent performance and interview at Today Show press conference in NY Premieres in London and New York; red carpet interviews hours of transatlantic flights
1D’s pace was much more relentless than the glancing summary I’ve given here.
–––––––
During the Four Hangout, Liam comments that there are "...a lot of meetings, there's a lot of meetings in Boybandville." [I added the video link]
(a very young and starry-eyed Zayn, Niall, Liam, Louis, and Harry are pictured above listening to the judges after their week 2 X-Factor performance, 2010) Below, Liam continues, "One thing we didn't realize when we [got in] this band is how many meetings you have." [I added the video link]
––––––
“…the business empire fronted by these cherubic faces now stretches well into the hundreds of millions of pounds, with licensing deals that include everything from lunchboxes to their own fragrances. Their ambition, or at least their management’s ambition, is seemingly infinite…
During press for Midnight Memories in France, interviewer Cauet asks, "After your films, books, perfume—what's coming up next?" Harry: Space Liam: Our own range of door handles... lampshades... curtains! Louis: Let's do radiators. Harry: Radiators. Louis: Warmth. Zayn: Next music video's on the moon! [I added the video link]
––––––
Harry Magee, Modest!Management: ‘The scale of this band is unprecedented. None of us involved in the band, from the management, to the agents, to the licensees, to retailers, have ever worked on anything this big before. There might be huge acts that have been going longer than 25 years but they are not nearly as broad as One Direction, especially when it comes to selling tickets and selling merchandise. …in terms of per-head numbers for merchandise we have broken all the numbers. We need more stands at the gigs. More people serving.’ … (GQ magazine, August 2013, emphasis mine)
(C'Cauet clip continues) Louis: One Direction central heating, I think. Liam: People. Our own range of people! Niall: Coffee tables! Liam: Opening a pet shop! Zayn: On the moon. (C’Cauet sur NRJ, 14 December 2013)
––––––
April 2012, below: it was rumored Simon had given them each 2 million pounds because they were so successful — Niall and Harry said ‘not true.’ In the first gif, Harry says, "He's a bit tight, Simon is." "That's why he's so successful, he's able to keep his money to himself,” Niall laughs.
––––––
1D partial gross revenue 2011-2014 (3 tours, 3 films): more than $500 million xx xx xx xx
(Here’s an enlightening post re: 1D finances) [updated the link]
––––––
Niall: You know when the Backstreet Boys and New Kids On The Block came back a few months ago? And all they did were arena tours. That’s how I’d like to be remembered.
Liam: Yeah, just pop in and do an arena tour every ten years…
Niall: Sell out Wembley. Smash it hard. Home in time for tea.
Liam: Fingers crossed, eh? (Aug 2013)
In the gif above, OT5 hug in a tight bundle on the day of their X-Factor Judges' House audition, when Louis had an injured foot.
–––––––
One Direction were/are ambitious… but one must consider their ages when they signed their contracts, who truly managed their schedule (’This is what you have to do if you want to succeed’) and the pressure to continue making money.
Beginning with X-Factor in October 2010, One Direction didn’t get any extended break until 21 Dec 2013 – Feb 2014, about nine weeks.
As students in the UK, they would've received anywhere from 10-22 weeks of vacation a year—not to mention being at home with the love and support of their families and friends.
master list of March 2012 filmed promo [by @youcancallmeathief]
March 2012 timeline [ @bulletprooflarry]
Four Hangout, Nov 2014
(all gifs by OP, @quietasides)"
One Direction won at the Brit Awards on 21 February 2012. Harry had just turned 18, Liam and Niall were 18, Zayn was 19, and Louis was 20.
Adding gif captions in italics! Above, the four gifs show some moments from Four Hangout, November 2014. Liam, Louis, and Zayn are pictured sitting on the red couch. Louis says, “I remember that first American promo trip was relentless.” Liam: “Crazy.” Niall: “Nuts.” Louis: “I think it was like three weeks on the trot that we were away [from home].” Liam asks him, “Do you remember when we were doing, like, ten things at once, as well? Doing interviews and signing and something else…” Louis: “That’s what it was all like. It was all just so, so manic.” Liam: “Crazy.”
Three days after the Brits, they were in Chicago for a radio interview/meet and greet. They also opened for Big Time Rush that night, and proceeded to play 12 shows over the next two weeks, each in a different city. During March they also did at least six signings, some smaller performances (such as three songs on the Today Show), and over 60 interviews.
14 March 2012, above: Louis, Harry, and Liam are pictured during one of the nine+ interviews they filmed that day. The interviewer asks, “What’s your favorite thing to do when you’re not working?” Liam replies with a rueful laugh, “Have days off!”
Keep reading
#this post is EXCELLENT and the info is terrifying#my god#timeline#masterpost#one direction#in this house WE HATE SYCO#in this house WE HATE MODEST!#also all this machinery…. and 2 closets that needed to be kept sealed#a never ending circle#gifs ranging from 2010-2014#2015#work schedule#elongated for archive purposes
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Call For Me | J.WY
𝓹𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: mad hatter! wooyoung x reader (fem)
𝓼𝓾𝓶𝓶𝓪𝓻𝔂: You find yourself going back to this same dream, struggling to get to the end. To your surprise, at the end of the hill, a man was waiting for you. His grin wide and his eyes lust-filled, Wooyung planned on making you come back to Wonderland.
𝔀𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: unprotected sex (pls wrap up!), oral (f receiving), fingering, some name-calling, slight choking
𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓭 𝓬𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓽: 4.5k
𝓪𝓾𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓻𝓼 𝓷𝓸𝓽𝓮: Alice in Wonderland is my favorite Disney movie. There was this video from a concert of Wooyoung and it completely sent me into a spiral and created this desire to write him as the Mad Hatter. I hope you guys enjoy it!
⁂𝓶𝓪𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽⁂
Your chest rose up and down at an ungodly speed. Your fingers, legs, and toes twitched at every twig you swerved around. Your main focus was following the tail of a rather plump purple cat that turned around, its smile grinning from ear to ear. You reached and reached and reached until the floor fell from under you.
Fuck.
Sweat glistened against your body as your eyes scanned your room. You had another dream; another dream where you tried reaching the end of the hill where the cat was sending you too. Every time you reached the end, a sultry laughter rang through and you woke back up, covered in sweat from head to toe.
You huffed, slinging your covers off your body before heading into the living room. Your roommates, Mingi and San, were sprawled out on the couch. San’s eyes landed on you and took on your disheveled form.
“Another bad dream?” He hummed, tossing his popsicle stick onto the coffee table.
You rolled your eyes, plopping down beside him, his arm slinging over your shoulder as you tried remembering exactly what the fat cat was saying to you. The dream was dark. All the trees were dead, and truthfully, the only true colors were the lights at the end of the hill. It shone bright like a lighthouse during a stormy night. You craved to reach the other side to see where that evil laughter was coming from. It sent shivers down your spine just remembering it, hearing the chuckle stemming from deep in the throat.
“I can’t keep having these dreams,” You mumbled, rubbing your eyes.
“What’s it about?” Mingi mused, leaning over so he could see you.
You shrugged, “Every night it’s the same: I walk past this garden with talking flowers, follow a white rabbit, end up losing him, and find this purple cat with a ringed tail and wide grin. Then, in the end, whenever I wake up, a deep, evil laughter rings through and I fall through,”
Mingi glanced at San, his eye widening before flopping back against the couch. You know they thought you were crazy. There couldn’t truly be any solution for what you’re feeling…could there? If it wasn’t significant, why do you keep having the same dre—
“Ow!”
You looked down, San had pinched you so hard that little crescents formed on your skin. You glared up at him, “What was that for?”
“Anytime you feel like you’re losing your mind, just call for me and I’ll pinch you to make sure you’re here with us,”
You eyed him, “I suppose that could work, but what about when I’m sleeping?”
“Well,” Mingi chuckled, “We’ll know because you’re the loudest talker in your sleep.”
You blushed, your hand shooting to your mouth before you stood up. You sent a quick glare to Mingi before heading back to your room. You were determined to reach the end of the hill, to see what was happening. Your fingers twitched as you ran them through your hair, your mind going back to when you fell down the dark hole.
“Remember, she needs to find the Hatter,” You glanced over at the talking rose, who genuinely looked like your grandmother.
“Indeed she does, but where does he stay? We haven’t seen Hatter in ages ever since the war with the Jabberwocky.”
“Jabberwocky?” You mumbled, brows furrowing together as the group completely ignored you.
“Yes, yes, the Jabberwocky dumb girl,” This time a blue flower acknowledged you before shooing you away with her leaf…hand?
“Follow me, dear,” The white rabbit whispered, tugging your fingers with his soft coated paws, “I believe I remember the way to the Hatter.”
Nodding, you follow him into the woods, the garden of flowers gossiping as you faded away into the darkness. Your eyes raked over the scene: trees curling over, clouds filling the sky, and the only light shinning is the moon. Twigs snapped under your feet as you followed swiftly behind the rabbit.
“The Hatter is a nice man, somewhat odd, but I’m sure he can help us out,” The rabbit more so said to himself.
“Who is this…. Hatter?” You questioned.
“Well, as you can tell from his name, he was once a Hatter, but after the war, his mind…lingered—“
“Lingered? I dare say he’s gone mad,”
You jumped, cocking your head to the side at the sight of a purple cat floating in mid air. His eyes were glowing and his smile went ear to ear. He curled his head to the side, his eyes never leaving you.
“And what’re you doing here, Cheshire?” The rabbit barked, his hands fidgeting around a small pocket watch.
“If you’re going to find the Hatter, best be on your way,” He jerked his head to the right.
You followed, your eyes coming to rest a glow emanating over the hill. You flicked your eyes back at the cat who was already smirking at you. Your skin itched with nerves, your stomach coiling at the idea of what’s over the hill.
“I can take her from here, sweet Rabbit. I know you have other places to be, seeing as you keep checking your watch,” The cat chuckled, flipping mid air and gliding towards the hill.
You glanced down at the rabbit, his little nose was twitching before he winced, taking off into the shrubbery.
Your brows furrowed, “And where do you plan on taking me? Seems like everyone is completely ignoring me!” You stomped your foot, your arms crossing across your chest.
The cat flipped backwards, his head hanging upside down as he glanced at you, his smile still glowing in the night. He slowly floated back towards you, his tail twitching back and forth. Your breath hitched in your throat as he was just a touch away.
“Not just anyone comes to these dreams. The Hatter demands to see you, he calls for you. Now, follow me.”
You smuggled your face into your pillow, screaming into the fluffy fabric. Who was the Hatter and why was he trying to get in contact with you through your dreams? You tossed your pillow to the side, your phone buzzing against the table.
From: Sannie
‘All good in there?’
You groaned, sending back a quick yes before slamming your phone back on the bedside table.
“Calls for me… Calls for me,”
You mumbled the phrase over and over again. Your teeth sank into your bottom lip as you pondered how the Hatter could call for you. Why were you so enticed to see this mystery figure? Just the name of the Hatter should send warning signs, but here you were, obsessing over the idea of finding this man.
You tugged your light blue night gown down, the fabric riding up on your thighs as you scooted further into bed.
“Hm, well, maybe I’ll call for him this time,” You whispered, “Hatter, Hatter, Hatter, Hatter,”
Your eyes popped open, and your feet smacked against the cobbled ground of the garden. You looked up into the sky, the clouds a purple hue and rain slightly tapping against your forehead. You fell back into this world. Hmm, maybe that did work. Shrugging your shoulders slightly, you followed the same path down to the talking flowers.
“Hatter, Hatter,” You kept mumbling his name over and over again, hoping to stay in tune with your dream.
“Oh, it’s you again,”
You abruptly stopped, the white rabbit dashing out of the ferns before coming to a halt in front of your feet. You cocked your head to the side, eyeing the red eyed creature before clearing you throat.
“The cat told me that I keep coming back here fore a reason and that the Hatter keeps calling for me.” You raised an eyebrow, “I think you know where he’s at,”
The rabbit gulped, pulling at the collar of his jacket before pulling out his watch. The slight tick tick tick was the loudest thing in the garden.
“I can’t guarantee that I can take you to him, but I can take you back to the Cheshire cat….he should know the way.”
You grumbled, your stomach turning into knots. It never fails that you fall back into your reality every time you get to the hill by following the cat. Your feet kicked small pebbles as the rabbit took you past the gossiping flowers, and deep into the dark forest. You don’t remember the dream being as vivid as it is now. You can feel the air, feel the rain settling in. The breeze crept across your body, sending goosebumps over your exposed legs and arms. Your thighs felt warm in the breeze and your hair shifted behind you. This dream felt real, felt as if you were truly in this wonderland.
As if on cue, the smiling cat appeared out of thin air, his grin exposing his hiding spot. You eyed him as he had the same conversation with the rabbit. Before long, the rabbit ditched you once again, leaving you with the floating animal as he bobbed up and down his little path. Your palms were sweaty with anticipation.
But not for long.
The clinking of tea cups and spoons colliding together filled your ears. Your heart fluttered at the sound and sped up, the glow of the hill becoming more prominent. The Cheshire cat came to a stop, a low chuckle coming from him. Coming to his side, your eyes fixated on the scene before you: a worn-out windmill, multiple tables put together, and a dirty, white tablecloth draped over them; tea cups, kettles, food, plates—everything that could ever be at a tea party littered the table. Not only that, another rabbit sat at the table along with a mouse.
Best of all, a young male sat at the end of the table, a tall hat adorned his head as he gnawed at his fingers. Your eyes never left him, a strong dark aura surrounding his body as he eyed the rabbit and mouse as they laughed and giggled across the table to each other. Before long, his eyes graced the table before landing on you, heat dropping to the pit of your stomach.
“I believe we have found him,” The cat murmured, floating down the rest of the hill.
Following suit, you trailed behind the cat, never taking your eyes off the young man. His eyes roamed your body, landing on your bare thighs multiple times. You clenched your thighs with each step, your body becoming hot under his stare. You have never seen this man before, and don’t even know why he keeps ‘calling for you’.
“It’s about time you showed up,” His voice bellowed across the table, hitting you in the pit of your stomach. “I was beginning to think you didn’t want to come.” His mouth spread into a wide grin, his teeth shining as bright as the cats.
“I-I kept trying-“
“Not trying hard enough, darling, for I had to sit here for days, staring at this ungodly clock tick-tick-ticking away,” He stared at the watch in his hand before tossing it onto the table, the ticking coming to a halt. “And now here you are! Welcome! Welcome! Sit down, have some tea.”
A loud laugh bellowed through his mouth as he kicked back in his chair, his feet propped at the edge of the table. You weren’t too sure what was exactly happening. The Cheshire took it upon himself to sit at the opposite end of the table, one furry paw gripping a teacup and the other stirring his drink.
“Well, are you going to sit?”
With the snap of his fingers, your body jolted forward, smacking down against cold wood. You gasped, glancing up and seeing the young man sitting beside you. His eyes were covered in black, the makeup oozing down from his waterline. The rest of him was covered in black clothing, pieces of random items put together and his feet laced in leather boots. You couldn’t take your eyes off him. In a perfect world, your reality, he could be a celebrity with his looks. The… Hatter… was a handsome man, and you wouldn’t deny it.
“Who are you?” You whispered, cocking your head to the side as you quizzed him.
He leaned forward, his head cocking to the side before letting out a deep chuckle, sending heat down your body.
“I’m the Hatter, of course,” He smiled, his teeth shinning white. “I’ve been eyeing you for a while, darling,”
“How?” You spit out, toying with your fingers.
He smirked, “I know everything about you, sweet girl. I know when you go home, when you cry, when you’re…pleasuring yourself,”
Your cheeks flushed, your mind racing with numerous thoughts on how the fuck this was happening. You peered across the table; the rest of the table were chatting amongst themselves, completely oblivious to the obscene comment that left the Hatter's mouth. You jerked your head back towards him, his eyes growing a shade darker as he scanned your face.
“March Hare,” He hummed, his eyes lazily falling onto the rabbit, hare… “Do you mind moving the party elsewhere? I’d like to speak to Y/N alone,”
You twitched at the sound of your name. You don’t remember telling him who you were at all. You stared him down, his skin glowing with the moonlight. His shirt was slightly unbuttoned, his chest rising up and down slowly.
Mumbling a quick yes, the hare took off with the mouse and Cheshire cat before leaving you with the Hatter. Your eyes fell back onto his figure, his eyes already staring you down.
“How do you know my name?” You breathed out, toying with the hem of your dress.
“Like I said,” He whispered, “I know everything about you. I’ve wanted to get you here, but my sweet girl, you keep failing.” He chuckled, “I remember someone telling you they would pinch you if you had another bad dream trying to find me.”
Your breath hitched in your throat. How in the hell did he know about San’s comment towards you? Your mouth went dry as the Hatter smirked, seeing the confusion in your face.
“H-How did you—“
“Know? I believe the question is: Is this dream a reality? Who could possibly tell?”
Before you could respond, the Hatter sat up, his elbows resting against the table as he eyed you. Another wide grin settled on his face.
“I think you should go back tonight, sweet girl. I believe I’ve wound your silly little brain up.”
Before you could stop him, with the snap of your fingers, you fell back down through the ungodly floor before smacking against your bed. Jerking up, you scanned your room again for the second time tonight. Your face was covered in sweat and your nightgown rose to your stomach. Your hand filtered its way down to your panties, a damp spot hovering over your clit. It must’ve happened, surely? You remember his smile, the way his eyes bore into yours.
Huffing, you throw the covers off you once again and march back into the living room. To your dismay, the boys were already in their rooms. Looking towards the kitchen, the clock read half past 3 in the morning. Your head slowly turned, your eyes falling onto San’s door. How did the Hatter know that San said that to you? You slowly began creeping, your feet padding against the floor softly. Your hand reached out to grab San’s door handle, but all of a sudden, your eyes went black.
Your body dropped back into the mysterious world. Your vision blurred as your body slumped against the cold wooden chair that you just inhabited moments ago. You gasped, your eyes shooting open as realization hit. The Hatter was standing in front of you, his body leaning against the table. His head cocked to the side, and low tsks escaped his mouth as he stared down at you.
“My sweet girl, why annoy a dear friend over my knowledge?” He leaned down, his eyes coming into view with yours, “I want to be rough with you.” His veiny hands reached out and fell upon your thighs. Your breath hitched in your throat as you trembled at the touch, “I want to feel the way your pussy throbs around my dick. I know you’ve been a naughty, sweet girl, I can smell it.”
Your legs clenched, his eyes darting down to the movement before smirking. He squatted, both his hands gripping the side of your thighs before pulling them apart. The cold air on your aching pussy caused you to shiver. He slowly licked his lips before looking back at you.
“Who are you?” You breathed out, your cheeks rosy from embarrassment and slight infatuation.
He smiled, “I’m Wooyoung, of course, and I’ve known you for a while, sweet girl. All thanks to your friend, I’ve been able to live freely in your mind, learning who you are, what you like, what turns you on,” He licked his lips, his thumb grazing over your smooth skin.
“What friend?” You breathed out.
His eyebrow cocked up, “San, of course. Who else?” He tilted his head to the side, his eyes boring into you.
Before you could answer, Wooyoung’s lips made contact with your skin, kissing up the bare skin. His eyes looked at you through his lashes, his tongue leaving a small trail of spit behind him. His fingers curled around your panties, pulling the fabric down, groaning at the sight of your juices stringing along, never snapping until his fingers ran through it.
“God,” He groaned, finally dropping to his knees, “I’ve been waiting for this,”
Wooyoung’s head dipped between your thighs, his nose brushing against your clit as his tongue slipped into your sopping core. Your head flung back, soft moans escaping your throat as his tongue lapped at your core. You knocked his hat off, his thick, black hair threading through your fingers as you gripped on for dear life. Pulling his head back, Wooyoung replaced his nose with his thumb, drawing quick circles around your bundle of nerves.
“You taste so good, darling. You’re so naughty for escaping into this reality with me,”
You dropped your head, your eyes lazily watching him as he licked his lips before diving back down into your sopping mess. Your mind was hazed over with sultry thoughts. However, it kept flicking back to San, and how Wooyoung knew him.
Before you could slip into deep thought, your stomach curled as Wooyoung replaced his tongue with his fingers and began thrusting into you. Gasping, you felt your core pull tighter and tighter.
“Woo-Wooyoung!”
You screamed, your orgasm rushing down his fingers as he fucked you through your orgasm. Chuckling, Wooyoung pulled his fingers out, your juices pooling in his hands. Looking down, you watched as Wooyoung placed the fingers in his mouth, his eyes never leaving yours as he sucked on your sweet release. Moaning, his eyes rolled into the back of his head before he stood up.
“I knew you’d taste good. I knew by the way your pussy was sopping just seeing me sitting here that it’d taste good.” He smirked, “You’re such a naughty, pathetic little girl for me, Y/N”
Gripping your chin, Wooyoung forced your mouth open, dropping your release onto your tongue “Taste yourself.”
You swallowed his spit, eyeing him as he let go of your chin. His boner pressed against his pants, his length showing through. You gulped, your mouth dropping at the sight. Your mind couldn’t comprehend what was going on at all. Here you were, fucked out just by the tongue of this man, in some unknowing world.
A slow grin spread across his face, his fingers toying the edge of the chair as he slowly walked around you. The tip of his finger stopped on your shoulder, trailing slowly down your arm, leaving goosebumps behind. Your breath was shaky, your mind completely zoned out as he squatted back down in front of you.
“Being inside of your dreams wasn’t good enough for me,” He whispered, his lips coming in contact with your thighs, sucking the sweet skin before letting go with a wet pop. “I’m so glad your sweet mind finally found its way to me.”
Your eyes raked over him, “How am I here?”
He chuckled, “That’s for another day, my sweet darling, but for now, I just want to fuck you.”
Before you could protest, Wooyoung grabbed your arm, hoisting you up onto your legs. His fingers gripped your light blue gown, tugging the fabric up before shoving you down onto the table. A low grunt passed your lips as he pressed his boner into your backside. A soft moan came from his lips as his hands roamed around the curve of your ass.
“So pretty, so… mad,”
Pushing his pants down, Wooyoung gripped his aching dick, giving himself a few quick strokes. Your body was trembling as the tip of his dick circled your clit. Soft pants escaped your lip at the sensation, your legs already shaking. Smirking, Wooyoung guided his tip up and down, coating himself in your juices.
“Are you ready, sweet girl?” His words warmed your ear, sending a shutter down your body.
“Y-Yes,” You breathed out, arching your back into him.
“Good,” He growled.
Giving one quick slap to the side of your thigh, Wooyoung pushed himself in, a loud gasp leaving your lips as a low growl escaped his. Your pussy clenched around his dick, your body warm and cozy just for him. He definitely stretched you out, filling you up to the brim. Tears filled your eyes, your nipples aching against the table at the sensation of your body being pleasured.
“Please move,” You gasped, rocking your hips back into him.
He smirked, his fingers ghosting the skin of your ass, “As you wish,”
Pulling back, Wooyoung rammed his hips into your backside. The skin-to-skin contact rang through the forest, nothing could be heard but your juices squelching against him; not even the birds were chirping.
“This is fucking impossible,” You moaned out, pulling your bottom lip in-between your teeth, your eyes rolling into the back of your head as his cock rammed into your cervix over and over again.
“Only if you believe it is, my sweet girl,”
His tongue lapped at the side of your neck, his right hand coming up to wrap around your throat, squeezing ever so gently around the column of your neck. Sweet gasps left your lips making Wooyoung’s cock throb at the sound. His mind was going animalistic at the sight of you bent on his table, with his cock deep inside of you, your juices running down your legs and onto his pants. He’s only ever wanted you here; wanted you here in his world where he can truly be himself, the Mad Hatter. His dreams ran wild with the thought of getting you to yourself, and now, here you were, so pretty underneath him.
“I-I’m about to cum,” You moaned, back arching more and more as his tip pressed against your g-spot over and over.
Hearing this, Wooyoung pulled out immediately, dropping to his knees and pressing his tongue deep inside of you. Screaming, you ground your clit against his nose and released your orgasm. All you could hear was Wooyoung slurping up your juices and his fingers massaging the back of your thighs. You couldn’t think straight, your mind hazy from what happened.
Wooyoung plopped himself down on his chair, the red velvet blending in perfectly with his all-black attire. Your arms shook as they held you up against the table, your eyes landing on the sight before you. Wooyoung’s cock stood straight up, his hand pumping the irritated skin so sweetly, so, so… fuck you couldn’t even begin to describe it. Sweat glistened across his chest, his breaths slightly heaving as he sat there and stared at your rosy cheeks.
“Come ride me, darling,” He gently patted his thigh, “I want to feel that sweet pussy convulse around me before I send you back,”
You nodded your head, taking baby steps to him making sure not to fall from how weak your thighs were. Spreading his legs further, Wooyoung placed his hands on your hips, guiding your drenching pussy down his cock. A long whimper left his throat, his breath fanning against your face. You stared at him, your eyes taking in his face. He was so fucking beautiful, so ethereal. One hand gripped his shoulder while the other lightly gripped his neck. He smirked before leaning in, pressing his soft lips against yours.
“You’ve made my wait worthwhile, dear. Now remember,” Wooyoung adjusted himself, slightly picking you up from your ass, “Whenever you need me, need me to fix your little issue,” He patted your ass, “Call for me,”
Wooyoung dropped you, his dick slamming against your cervix. You moaned, your body bouncing with the speed of his thrusts. Your breast bounced up and down in front of him, his fingers toying with the rosebuds that peaked through your nightgown. Your head lulled back, black and white spots adorning your vision.
“I’m fixing to cum again,” You whispered, licking your lips as you brought your head back.
Wooyoung’s tongue was toying his lips, his eyes focused on where your pussy and his dick connected. His cheeks began to flush, his chest slightly red as well.
“Cum for me, sweet girl. Cum around my cock so I have a reason to keep waiting,”
As if on cue, your body convulsed to his words, your pussy clenching around his dick.
“Fuck!”
His hips jerked, smacking against your bottom faster as he reached his own climax. Wooyoung panted, his seed coating your inside as you slumped down onto his chest. His hands wrapped around you, peppering sweet kisses along your shoulders. You could’ve passed out right there, but Wooyoung patted your butt and lifted you up.
“What’re you doing?” You mumbled, squeezing your thighs together to keep the cum from dripping down your legs.
He smiled, pulling his pants up, running his fingers through his hair, “You’ve got to go back,”
“Wait—“
Wooyoung snapped his fingers and there you were, falling once again and landing with a soft thud onto your bed. You shot up, running your fingers over your face.
“What the fuck!”
You jerked your head towards your window, sunlight was beaming in. You glanced down at your thighs and saw the love bites that Wooyoung had left on your thighs. It happened. You finally reached the end of the hill and came back with this. Your body shivered remembering what just happened. Tossing your covers back, you open your bedroom door and see San and Mingi standing by the door.
“What’s up?” You mumbled, wiping your face.
“Uh…” San rubbed the back of his head, “Someone’s here to see you.”
Taking a step to the side, San revealed who was at the door. Your mouth dropped, your pussy clenching at the sight.
“Hello, my sweet darling”
© yuyuyunnie, 2024.
#jung wooyoung#wooyoung smut#wooyoung ateez#ateez#ateez fanfiction#ateez x reader#wooyoung x reader#yunho#mingi#san#yeosang#jungho#seonghwa#hongjoong
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Kinktober day 30
Bruce Wayne + Roleplay
This was supposed to be a Bruce and a “paparazzi” reader situation, but I couldn’t be assed to write it. So have some good ol, ceo and assistant roleplay, but with a twist. What if BRUCE, was the assistant?
I almost put Bruce in a skirt in this, but contained myself, youll have to enjoy him in sock suspender instead.
Kinktober 2024 masterlist
It wasn’t every day that Bruce got to enjoy himself like this. Where he got to hang up the cowl and act out a whole scene with his lover and not be interrupted. The cowl wasn’t far away, it never was, but it was at least put away inside the closet on the other side of the room, beside your own hero suit.
Had he been the airheaded billionaire that the public thought he was, Bruce might have been bold enough to act out these fantasies in his own office at WE, but even Bruce wasn’t that dumb. In the end, the two of you just set up one of the many normally forgotten offices at the manor, far enough from the rest of the so-called bat clan to get some privacy.
You had made a comment once upon a time that maybe the reason Bruce liked to be the assistant, the nurse, the maid, so on and so forth, was because he always craved control during his everyday life. Which resulted in him wanting to give up the power to you, in a controlled discussed manner. You may have been right, but it wasn’t as if Bruce would verbalize that.
When you two had the time, you pulled on one of the many expensive tailored suits Bruce had gotten for you over the years, styling your hair in the most stereotypical CEO style you could find on pinterest, even pulling on one of Bruces expensive watches to complete the look.
Whenever he wanted to be the assistant, Bruce pulled a look that always had you thinking about Clark for just a split second. It wasn’t in an attracted to Clark type of way, more just a small thought about how similar they looked, as Bruce gave himself a hairstyle that made him look like a true sweetheart and put on fake glasses to match the cheaper suit he wore.
The roles were what made it so good, to see Bruce stumble over nothing and drop “important documents” all over the floor as you sat back and glared like a CEO from a trashy romance novel as Bruce got onto his knees to try and pick it all up again.
Of course, Bruce always made sure to turn his ass towards you as he “struggled” to pick up all the documents, pushing them around on the floor as he arched his back and spluttered apologies, his hips wiggling from side to side as he reached and arched.
You would spit comments and sneer at your “clumsy assistant”, sending him on tasks that he would mess up until you needed to punish him for it. Bruce always whined and apologized with a shaky high-pitched tone as you bent him over your desk, pulling his cheap slacks down with little care.
His whines and gasps were like music as you turned his behind and thighs rest. Sometimes you used your palm, other times a ruler, your belt, or whatever else you two had agreed to use. Seeing your usual gruff and serious lover so flushed and keening was like a drug in your system, only making you lay into him even harder until Bruce was coating the desk in his spend.
When this happened, you would tsk and coo mockingly at him as you pulled his slacks fully off his legs, leaving him in his button-up, socks and sock suspenders. Even after all these years, your lover was still so flexible, allowing you to pull one of his legs up onto the desk to give you easy access.
Bruce would whine and moan so prettily as he tried to rock back against you, the fake glasses having fallen off with a clatter at an extra hard thrust that would have had him skittering across the desk, if you hadn’t gripped onto his strong thighs and wrenched him back against you.
It was only good enough when you had him spilling tears from pleasure, his voice melting from the fake pitch he used as your so-called assistant, into his true overstimulated voice. You knew that acting sometimes was what he needed, but getting him to spill enough times to turn into a loose limbed loving mess was almost more satisfying for you.
You always made sure you pull off most of your “costume”, even if it was just clothes you guys already owned, before you got to work taking care of Bruce. You had to wipe him down, giving him lots of love and kisses, before putting him into a prepared bath.
After that you spent a little too long cleaning up the office, just so poor Alfred wouldn’t have to do it, before you could return to Bruce and bring him to bed. He was always so nice and pliant after scenes like this, where he didn’t have to be Batman, Brucie or even Bruce, and that was all you wanted, for him to be happy and satisfied.
#male reader#bruce wayne#batman#dc#justice league#bruce wayne x reader#bruce wayne imagine#bruce wayne headcanon#bruce wayne x male reader#batman imagine#batman headcanon#batman x male reader#batman x reader#dc imagine#dc headcanon#dc x male reader#dc x reader#justice league x reader#justice league x male reader#justice league imagine#justice league headcanon
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Here’s a link to find your state senator/representative here:
Phone Script:
“My name is _____ and I am a constituent from [address]. I am calling today to urge Senator ___ to support Senate Joint Resolutions 114 and 115 to disapprove of the sale of arms and services to the Government of Israel. United State’s tax dollars have funded over 70% of the horrific violence against Palestinians. Despite reports of U.S. weapons being used to kill and injure innocent Palestinians, and the evidence of Israel blocking aid for over a year, we have continued to offer a non-stop flow of weapons, money, and support. Over 60,000 people have died because of Israel’s actions during this conflict. This genocidal violence will only end when we stop supplying the weapons.”
Email Script:
Dear Senator _____
My name is _____ and I am your constituent from [address]. I am writing today to urge you to support S.J.Res 114 & 115 introduced by Senator Sanders.
These resolutions would disapprove of the sale of certain defense articles, weapons, and services to the Government of Israel. At least 60,000 Palestinians have died since the beginning of the current conflict and the United States has funded over 70% of the Israeli military’s violence. Countless people have been displaced and injured as the IDF’s indiscriminate campaign has continued. Even more have suffered as Israel has blocked aid.
This genocide against Palestinians will only end when we stop providing a constant and unconditional supply of weapons, support, and money to the Israeli Government. About 60% of Americans support some sort of ceasefire agreement in Gaza, and I am disappointed that congress has only continued to act in opposition to the will of the people.
I ask you to take the historic opportunity presented by S.J.Res.114 and 115 to approach this situation with compassion. I hope you will cosponsor both of these resolutions and vote in favor of them.
Thank you for your time,
[Your Name]
Howdy folks, the Senate will be considering the first ever resolution blocking arms to Israel. This is huge and historic; it would block government contracting and about $20 billion in arms and support. This is an uphill battle, PLEASE urge your senators to support S.J.Res114-115. This is maybe the most important piece of legislation relating to Palestine that we have ever gotten and we must seize this opportunity.
This doc has information on the resolutions and their process, as well as sample messages and a phone script you can use. Please, use this moment to hear witness for your neighbors.
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A degree? Who needs that anyway?
Boyfriend!Bucky x Female!Reader
summary: Bucky noticed you were exhausted during this time of the semester. Being the supportive golden retriever boyfriend he was, he just wanted to make you feel better. Unfortunately, his efforts only showed him how stressed you really were. So he vowed to support you through it all.
a/n: I have finally finished all my work and am back in business, baby! I'm so excited to spend the cozy season writing and posting again. Thank you for being so patient and supporting. I am so unbelievably grateful for this community. This is for all the academic girlies struggling through exam season like I do...
word count: 1.9k
warnings: feelings stress and not being enough, perfectionsim (and the pressure that comes with it), projecting self worth onto academic achievements, Bucky being adorable and supportive (perfect boyfriend alert!), just a whole lotta fluff
・゚✫* 𝒎𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝒎𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕 。✭・゚✶ 𝒄.𝒂𝒊 ✧*・゚
You were stressed. Bucky knew it. Everyone was walking on eggshells around you, if - ever - you allowed yourself to step out of the apartment to see your friends or work your part-time job. He'd never seen you like this. You were a social butterfly, the total opposite of him with the ability to recharge when you were around the people you loved most. But for a month or so you'd been living the hermit life. And Bucky did not like it one bit.
It gave him an uneasy feeling, a squeeze to his heart, a hatred for anything that could potentially set you off. Because it was there - the potential. He was just waiting for it. For the shoe to drop, for you to break. For him to go on a rampage against all things bothering you.
He knew you were strong and stubborn, and that you hated to ask people for help. But there was only so much a person could endure. Hell, Bucky knew too well himself. Because he was the same. He hated asking for help - he hated accepting that he was bad at something. But this... just broke his heart.
He tried to take you out, to get you to eat with him - anything to get you back to your normal routines. But not even when he mentioned your favorite pastime activity did he get an enthusiastic smile out of you. That’s when he knew something was seriously wrong. Well, not something. He knew it was University. You’d complained about your professors at the beginning of the semester to him, how they were too ambitious for their own good and required a mountain of weekly readings not even that guy from Transformers could manage. Now... towards the end of the term, he saw how that ambition bled into your papers and final exams.
And Bucky? Well, he didn’t know how to act around you. It seemed like a silly selfish problem but normally you would be the one seeking contact and physical touch. He enjoyed it every time but he was just not good at initiating it himself. You’d seemed to shut him out completely. Working yourself away on your desk only to fall asleep on it and have Bucky carry you to bed. He hated seeing you like this.
He knew it wasn’t a permanent state - it couldn’t be. Because even though he considered you the strongest person he knew, there had to be a point at which even you broke.
And then, one day, it just happened. Without warning. Bucky hadn’t wanted to be right, so he had just ignored the thought of your breaking beneath all the pressure completely. And that was why he did not have as much as a hunch when you were talking over breakfast and the dam broke.
You had been up since well before Bucky had finally convinced you to eat with him. He’d even gone to your favorite bakery this morning to get the little pudding pastries you loved so much. And when he came back, he silently pulled your chair back and dropped you at the dining table. Everything seemed pretty good for a while. And then, out of nowhere, while Bucky was telling you about his trip to the Bakery, you had just started crying - hard.
Bucky had never seen so many tears. Not even when the wives of his fellow soldiers stood at the peer waving his comrades goodbye with white handkerchiefs. He shook the memory away. He thought the amount of tears quite impossible with the neglect of drinking water he had witnessed over the past week but they just kept coming. And Bucky wanted to hold you but something told him it wouldn't help one bit.
You were sobbing into your hands drawing in shaky breaths as you hid your face from him and everything inside him began to scream. Scream at him for sitting there frozen like an idiot and screaming at all the professors who deserved nothing more than a good punch in their oh so intelligent faces.
"It's just all too much. I’m so exhausted, Bucky.” A trembling breath that was muffled by your hands pressing into your mouth. Bucky was raging, but he let you continue. “And I hate that... I hate that I let this consume so much of my time and ...me. I hate that I let it affect me so much when I’m at the point at which I don't even know if it's worth it anymore.”
Bucky drew in a sharp breath at that statement. You had been working so hard, dedicated so much time and effort to work toward a goal he wanted you to achieve as much as you wanted to initially. To hear you doubt yourself broke his heart into a million pieces. He knew you were capable of it, but something told him not to say that just now. It was then you finally lifted your face and let your reddened eyes search for his. His fingers itched to touch your face. Why didn’t he do so?
“And it doesn’t help that everyone believes in me you know?” He nodded, though he didn’t quite understand. “I love each of my friends but every person that tells me they believe in me and how they don’t even doubt I’ll make it adds more pressure on top of the standard I set for myself.”
This was it. This was the moment he needed to touch you. Bucky rose from his chair and knelt down beside yours. His warm hand reached up toward your face and you immediately fell into his embrace. Your forehead pressed into his muscular shoulder, your arms reached around him and his entire body felt tingly as relief flooded through it.
"I am so scared I'm going to fail.” You exhaled into his shirt as his hand gently stroked your back. He wanted to tell you how failing wasn’t bad. How much he would love you regardless and how stupid a dumb degree was anyway. He wanted to kiss you and whisper against your skin how you could excel at everything you tried by simply being yourself because, for Bucky, you were the epitome of perfection.
But he didn’t do any of it. Because he also knew how important this was for you. Even if you were questioning if anything was worth it at this point - it definitely wasn’t in his eyes if it meant seeing you so crushed by something as trivial as a file on your computer - Bucky knew he’d help you walk through a hurricane if that was what you needed from him. Hell, he’d gladly do so if it would bring your beautiful smile back to your face. This degree felt really close to what he imagined walking through a hurricane to be like right about now. And he thought that he would never want one himself if this was what you had to go through in order to get it. Besides, who needed a degree anyway? Back in his day, you weren’t more special for it. Being a soldier did the job just fine... then again, that was probably worse than the hurricane thing. Focus Bucky.
Bucky pulled back and kissed your tears off your face and then he pressed one more kiss to your salty lips for good measure. Yes, he’d do anything for you - degree or not.
“What can I do to help you, love? I hate seeing you like this.” He froze for a second in fear of adding more pressure by expressing his sadness. And surely, you just started crying harder as your face fell forward again. Oh no, Bucky thought.
“I-“ you hick-uped, “I don’t know.” Seriously where did you get all that water from? “I love you so much. And I appreciate you so much and I know you want to comfort me but if we were to cuddle for an hour I would just stress myself out about the time I could spend studying - even if all I wanna do is cuddle you.” The stream didn’t stop when you cried harder. “And I hate that!”
Bucky nodded frustrated. "I love you too.” And then he cradled your head with his metal hand.
For a good minute, you just stayed like this. Bucky pressed you deeper into his chest until your sobs slowly died down and your stuffy breathing became steadier. He kissed your hair just to stroke over it again and then kiss it once more. For the first time in weeks, he felt like he did something that relaxed you a little. And even though you had just cried a river in your kitchen, you were so much calmer than before.
You sniffled adorably when you looked up at him after some time. “Just know I know how difficult I am right now. I cannot wait for this to be over. It’s just... I don’t even know how to take care of myself right now, I can’t possibly know how to include you in this as well.” A final tear fell and Bucky was fast to wipe it away. “But I am so glad you’re here.”
“Okay, I understand.” He answered and hugged you again, vowing to initiate daily cuddle/relief breaks from here on out. There wasn’t much he could do, he knew that and hated it too. If he could, he would write your papers for you, but Bucky was convinced he was not nearly smart enough for that, so anything else had to make do. He’d keep the apartment clean so you had a good atmosphere to learn, he’d make sure you slept and ate on time, and he’d supply all the love you deserved regardless of exam season. “And you just know that I will be here for you, patiently waiting until you have the capacity to include me again.” He pushed your hair from your forehead and kissed you sweetly. “I will support you in everything you do...” Another kiss, this one, you reciprocated. “Always.” And another long, warm lasting kiss to seal his promise. “If you promise me one thing... one thing only,” he whispered.
“What is it?” You whispered back.
“Promise to let me take care of you. I know you would spend 25 hours in a day studying if it were possible, but you can't keep it up like this.” He nodded. “Let me make sure you have the headspace for all your studying. Don’t deny my bringing you food, or dragging you to bed. And collect at least three kisses and one hug every day for emotional support,” he smiled faintly, a cheeky glimmer in his eyes that shone in yours as well.
“Okay, I promise.”
Bucky kissed you again, pressing your body against his with gentle strength. His heart began to beat faster when he felt your nails rake down his shoulders.
From then on Bucky would come up to you and hug you for a couple seconds, calling it ‘quick recharge’. He would hold you when you cried - but only when you cried because you needed to spend your dedicated hours of studying- holding you was for later. And then he would remind you to drink enough water after watching your tears soak into his shirt. But what he looked forward to the most, were the evenings when you would cuddle into his side in bed and let him lull you to sleep. He felt accomplished as he watched you relax outside the study schedule you set up with him, being able to fully be present when you ate together or went to bed. There were still rough times, but Bucky was there to hold you regardless, smiling at the fact that his touch could calm you down and that it would be over soon - and then he’d spend entire days making up for everything that fell short because of that viscous degree.
please take care of yourself, just like Bucky would during an exhausting time like this 💛
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#megs imagines#bucky x reader#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes oneshot#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes imagine#bucky x y/n#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky x you#bucky imagine#bucky barnes#bucky x yn#the winter soldier#captain america winter soldier#james bucky barnes#bucky fanfic#james buchanan barnes
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mixed feelings w/ bruce wayne rules | m.list
note. hiii i'm back (who knows for how long lmao) but i wanted to write a fake dating au with bruce so here we go! feel free to request, i'll try to do them as soon as possible <3
How difficult it was to be the official girlfriend of no one else than Bruce Wayne himself. It was even more since you weren’t his real girlfriend but only a cover for him to always have someone to bring during those never ending galas. It wasn’t an easy life ; people were always asking questions about your relationship, about an intimacy you didn’t share with him at all.
Why would you be doing this? Because Bruce was paying you well. More than well actually, it was more than you could ever gain with a classic full-time job. There was no way you would let go of this opportunity just because you were tired of those fake asses everywhere. You were stronger than that, especially for so much money.
So here you were, talking with some women at one of those parties where he always brought you to. You could sense the jealousy and tension in their tone as they spoke to you. After all, you were supposedly dating the heir of Gotham, the most powerful man in this sick city. You could understand their behavior in a way, you would have probably not be better than them.
Until you heard a voice you couldn’t recognize. You had come to enough parties to know almost everyone by now, but this one? You couldn’t tell. When you turned around, your eyes laid on a charismatic man, with a charming smile. His blond soft locks were pushed back, giving him a clean look. Behind those blue eyes, you could feel a man that used to have his way with everyone ; you could recognize them so easily.
“Milady,” he took your hand in his, bringing it closer to his lip so he could leave a gentle kiss on the back of it, against the dark glove that was covering your delicate hand. You were a bit surprised, because no one ever dared touching you like this before. You were here with Bruce Wayne after all, nobody wanted this man against them.
“It’s an honor to be finally meeting the woman I have heard so much about.” His voice was smooth, too much for it to be without any second thought behind. But all you did was to smile gently at him, your soft gaze laying on his face. You had to be correct, polite ; it was the most important thing, as Bruce always said.
“And you are?” You asked without a harsh tone, just wanting to know who the man in front of you was. You were curious, you had to admit it. You weren’t used to this kind of behavior at all. And this is how you ended up spending some time with this man, without your supposed boyfriend noticing anything.
Until he did. And oh God, the man felt something ignite inside his veins. When his eyes laid on your figure, so close to this guy, all smiling and laughing like you rarely did with him, it didn’t feel right, not to him. You should be like this with him, not anyone else.
You were about to say something when you felt a hand resting against your hip. It didn’t take you long to recognize his touch ; those hands could be to one man alone. You looked at the man with your softest smile, the one you had so much practiced. But he wasn't looking at you. Oh no. All his attention was fixed on the blondie in front of you.
“Bruce Wayne! What a pleasure.” He offered his hand to Bruce, and you could feel his fingers slightly tensing around your hip. He shook the man’s hand, but it was pure politeness. He had an image to protect, but it was obvious that if it was only him, he would already have hit the guy right in the face for acting so casually with you.
You didn’t have time to talk much more with the man, because your ‘boyfriend’ decided it was enough for the night, and that you should both be going by now. You were in his expensive car as he drove you back to your apartment. The mood was… awful. Something felt so off, and you couldn’t understand what.
“What’s wrong with you?” You asked him, glancing at his figure in the driver’s seat. He frowned a little at his words, just enough for you to notice it. You sighed ; it was really feeling like talking to a child who doesn’t have the toy he wanted. “I did as you told me to, I tried to sympathize.”
A bitter chuckle left his lips at his words, and this time it was your turn to frown. You didn’t like that, when he was acting like it was your fault when you clearly didn’t do anything wrong. “Speak already!” You snapped at him and he suddenly stopped the car, letting a light gasp leaving your lips. You looked back at him, eyes widened.
“Are you mad?” You almost yelled at him, and this time he was looking right into your eyes. “You had fun with this stupid guy, uh? Was it so great?” Reality finally hit you. He was jealous. Bruce Wayne, the cold and indifferent heir of Gotham, was jealous of some random guy you spent the night with. You couldn’t believe it.
“Seriously? What are you scared of, that he paid me enough to leave? I won't-” You couldn’t finish your sentence, as Bruce reached your face with his hand to hold your chin between his fingers. He was calm, too calm. “I don’t care about how he could pay you. It’s not about money.”
Not about money? With him? Something was clearly wrong. “It’s about you. You shouldn’t have eyes for anyone else other than me.” He let go of your chin, putting his hand back on the steering wheel, focusing on the road again.
It was difficult to follow a man who had such mixed feelings, so tortured in his mind. You simply glanced at him, before you looked through the window, waiting for the car to finally arrive at your place. It was not like you could do anything about this anyway.
Time would tell how things will turn out, but no one other than Bruce could change how it was.
thank you for reading!
#bruce wayne#bruce wayne x reader#bruce wayne headcanon#batman#batman x reader#batman headcanon#dc comics#dc x reader#dc batman#dc bruce wayne#x reader
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Ryoshu and Grief
Ryoshu as a sinner is defined by her lust for blood, art, and the beauty that comes with both. However I think a large chunk of people realize that this is not her only trait, and this is something that has slowly been fed out across the Cantos and Egos we’ve gotten for her.
Spoilers for basically all of Limbus.
Since her reveal, we’ve had some plenty of reads that PMoon is not taking her inspiration, Hell Screen, as mere setup for an insane artist. Her constant connection with Spider-Bud and family shows that she is at the bare minimum connected to the lore of the family torn apart by lust for a perfect painting of Hell itself.
Ryoshu’s identity in relation to Hell Screen and a traditional family setup is something that honestly deserves more attention in a separate post, but it’s clear something massive happened between her family and it’s caused her a massive trauma response that triggers grief quite often...even if it doesn't seem like that.
Most of Ryoshu’s behavior is opposite to how people usually think of grieving, but it’s still a form of grieving nonetheless. She tries to repress her emotions through increasing forms of ecstasy. As someone who has depression and has gone through losses of my own, one of the possible responses you can have is to try to chase some emotion, regardless of what it is and how unhealthy it is for yourself and those around you. You’ll do anything for that warm feeling of positivity about yourself.
Regardless of this though, that sadness still exists in Ryoshu. We know this thanks to her mood during Canto 7 being rather quiet aside from the betrayal of Hugo, where she immediately decides to cut off his arms due to it being “unoriginal and played out”. Otherwise she’s being bristly towards the concept of family, but not actively aggressive or particularly violent. In fact, the one time I'd say she has a strong reaction in this Canto is to Sinclair's interpretation of her usual acronym stuff.
Ryoshu and Sinclair honestly ALSO deserve their own post because there is a lot to go into, but to put a cap on it I'll simply state that Ryoshu has a lot of emotions regarding Sinclair. It's the only thing that can rouse her aside from the art of betrayal she sees from Hugo, because the concept of family triggers her that much. There's a reason that the ONLY Ryoshu ID to have Gloom in their kit is Spider Eyes, because she's having to directly confront the very concept of family and protecting others, and it's reflected in her giving out more support than most of her other kits and in story by helping calm Yi Sang.
This sadness and desire to care exists across the Mirror Worlds as well, she just does a far better job of hiding it under her usual veneer of "insane artist only pursuing ecstasy". Edgar Family Butler is all about taking the role of caretaker of things, and she normally helps take care of her fellow butlers, only changing her attitude when they are about to be raided by the Wild Hunt and die. Even in something like her W Corp or 7 Association identities, she still has her kit showing off some support by giving out fragility for the team or even giving out barrier in W Corp.
No matter what she does, it's inescapable for her, and something she is desperately hiding away in order to keep things moving. The very same way Yosihide continued his painting, Ryoshu keeps spreading violence to hide away her grief. But it will always be there, underneath the surface, if you look closely enough.
Overall, it's a fascinating take on grief and how one can cope with it, and PMoon has always done a wonderful job on not taking the typical route with things. They did it before with Roland's grief, and it's clear that they're doing similar things with Hell Screen's adaptation. Also thanks to @lu-is-not-ok for inspiring me to write up more about one of my favorite sinners, since their posts analyzing The Red Chamber and Hong Lu fascinate me to no end. Additionally thanks to @ryoshudoodles for making beautiful art themselves and showing off the duality of Ryoshu's lust and gloom beautifully.
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is it too early to start asking about christmas blurbs? maybe a Christmas day on ellieverse (I feel like she'd LOVE this season, especially with presents)
as far as i'm concerned it is christmas so it's definitely not too early omg 🤭 (and i'm simplifying this a bit just so we can continue discussing hotchner family christmas festivities all the way through the season 🥰)
and yes!!! omg ellie's absolutely getting up at the crack of dawn and waking you and aaron up 😭 honestly, dawn is still asleep - it's pitch black outside as ellie comes into your bedroom, climbing into your bed, in her christmas pajamas and clutching onto her favorite stuffed bunny.
you and aaron are exhausted. the two of you got to bed late - wrapping, getting all the presents situated under the tree, aaron spent a good amount of time building ellie's new dollhouse. and not only that, ellie would not go to bed 😭 she has her habit of delaying bedtime already, but on christmas???? the only way she actually got to sleep is by watching a christmas movie - 🥺 she was nestled into your side and finally drifted off. not by choice though, she couldn't keep her eyes open.
she was already going to bed late as it was christmas eve, so that delayed you and aaron getting christmas ready even more, and the two of you got to bed super late. (i neeed to write a fic consisting of this omg)
hehe so as she's whining and poking the two of you, aaron sleepily mumbles, "it's not christmas yet" and ellie's like ">:( no!! yes it is!!!!!!" and is pulling the comforter off him 😭 and then she climbs onto you, in hopes of a better answer and because "daddy's being a grinch >:(" 😭😭😭
ellie does settle down for another hour or so; you put a show on for her to watch if she's not going to sleep, and so you and aaron can sleep. but eventually she goes into jack's room and gets him up, so now you and aaron kinda have to be up by default LOL 😭 the two of you are just as excited as she is of course, you just wouldn't mind a bittt more sleep.
and christmas morning ����🥹🫶🏻🫶🏻 is just so full of happiness and cheer <333 a yummy breakfast, and presents!!! not only is ellie thrilled to see what santa got her, she's even more thrilled to give you and aaron presents 🥹 just some crafts she made at school 🫶🏻 like her handprint as a christmas tree, a handmade ornament, or one of those elf crafts where she's the elf - her school picture is the face 🥹🥰
AH she's just so full of life and is so excited and giggly the whole day 🥰🥰🥰 and she's especially excited to go over to grandpa dave's for christmas dinner and see all her aunts and uncles <3333
and that night, ellie goes to bed immediately. christmas itself wore her out, and again it was during one last christmas movie 🥹 hehe she and aaron were watching rudolph and she was gone in like two minutes. 🥹🥹🥹 she had the best day
#ellie hotchner <3#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#aaron hotchner x you#criminal minds x you#aaron hotchner imagine#criminal minds imagine#criminal minds x reader
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I haven’t seen any posts comparing Buck’s coming out to Eddie and Tommy breaking up with Buck, which is a shame because the similarities drive me insane.
Or well. I say similarities, but that’s wrong. What I should be saying is: these scenes mirror each other. This post is more about the highlights than shot by shot comparisons – for that, I’d recommend you watch them side by side yourself.
Let’s start with the first and most obvious structural parallel: both scenes happen around 32 minutes into their respective episodes/between two-thirds to three-quarters in.
Now, for the scenes themselves. They follow the same basic outline, which I’ll discuss one by one. I’m following the same structure throughout: I discuss the coming out scene, then the breakup, and then give some analysis. At the end, I’ve included a section on further things of note that I couldn’t neatly fit into this structure and my final thoughts. Is this the first time I’m using the media analysis I was taught during my minor in Arts, Culture and Media with a focus on film in 2019? Yes, yes it is.
Buckle up, because this meta/essay is nearly 3k. For that reason (i.e. accessibility/readability and the amount of work I put in), this entire piece has been cross-post to AO3 (CLICK FOR LINK).
Opening shots
Seating 1.0
Buck in the kitchen
Seating 2.0
POV shots (both perspectives)
Eddie and Tommy leaving
Miscellany
Final thoughts
Analysis under the cut:
1. Opening shots
This part includes some of the most noticeable differences between the scenes, which explains why they feel different – at least at first.
CO: Eddie’s phone comes into view first – this is his chat conversation with Marisol, which the first part of the CO scene is about (note how this mirrors the gym scene, where Buck intended to come out before the conversation lingered on Eddie and Marisol). Eddie is also closest to the door during this part of the scene – which is where he will remain throughout.
BU: The first shot is of a closed door, which Buck opens for Tommy, i.e. Tommy certainly has no keys to Buck’s place, and this might well be a callback to doors as a recurrent theme. They greet with the briefest kiss possible. I rewatched this several times to make sure it really happened – it happens immediately after a cut and it’s filmed in such a way this could easily have been an air kiss lmao. (No seriously, I had to watch this screen by screen to properly catch it, and the audio is a lot more obvious than the visual). They make small talk about the movies and Tommy having ordered an uber (clearly a throwback to 7x05), and they switch positions so Buck is actually closest to the door.
As for clear similarities: Eddie and Tommy are standing up and remain mostly in the same place; Buck is moving around the loft – it’s an expression of his nervous energy, and the major changes in these scenes are about Buck, not Eddie or Tommy.
2. Sitting down
I made this a separate point for one reason, and one reason only: In CO, Eddie takes his own initiative to sit down, while saying he should go home and Buck offering him a beer, so clearly he won’t be leaving to go home any time soon(ilu Eddie but I’m begging you, stop putting yourself and also us through this 😭). In BU, Buck tells Tommy to sit down... which is in part to signal they need a more serious talk than can be done on the way to the cinema, but also shows a massive contrast in terms of familiarity and comfort, regardless of what Buck tries to tell Tommy later.
Both Eddie and Tommy sit down on the leftmost stool (closest to the door, i.e. it’s easiest for them to leave and Buck can’t get between them).
3. Buck in the kitchen
Fun fact! Before writing this post, I checked the scene where Buck confesses to Taylor that he kissed Lucy. During that scene, Buck is sitting down at the kitchen island, while Taylor lingers in the kitchen proper (i.e. with the island between them). She has moved in at that point – kitchens represent ‘being at home’ – but there’s a physical barrier between her and Buck, and it doesn’t actually keep from her leaving (even while saying she has nowhere to go).
CO: The camera uses a dolly shot to follow Buck throughout the kitchen – to the fridge and then back to the head of the kitchen island. He’s attentively listening to Eddie complain about Marisol and God watching him have sex (cursing God while sluttily drinking his beer).
BU: Buck walks out of view of the camera, through the kitchen, and there’s a dolly shot to the right to focus on Buck finding his place on the head of the kitchen island. He leans on the counter at this point. He does have a pretty open posture (identical to CO); Tommy sits with his hands/fingers folded together but he’s turned to Buck i.e. paying attention.
This is the position Buck has when he comes clear to Tommy about having dated Abby in the past; it’s also when his phone comes into the picture. Well. Pictures. Of Buck and Abby.
4. Seating 2.0
This is the longest section of analysis, and contains the part that makes me SCREAM but let’s start at the beginning. From the moment Buck sits down, the conversation turns serious in both scenes. This dialogue consists of mostly POV shots (which I will discuss next), and these medium shots that show Buck and Eddie, and Buck and Tommy.
CO: Buck sits down while Eddie says, “You and Tommy have the right idea, stay single.” This very clearly introduces a new section of the scene. Overall, the lighting of the loft is muted besides the yellow for visual interest and gay Eddie, thank you for your hard work Buddie colour theorists. Buck’s dining table is unlit and barely visible, so the space really takes a back seat and allows us to focus on Buck and Eddie. Please take note of the chair between them – this serves as a physical barrier, where someone is getting between them (a place for Marisol and Tommy, respectively).
BU: Here, the segway happens right after Buck’s come clear about being Abby’s ex 2.0. He sits down on the middle chair, but it’s quite obvious he’s shoved it away from Tommy. In fact, compared to CO, Buck is almost at the same distance from Tommy as he is from Eddie. There’s a barrier between Buck and Eddie, but there’s space between him and Tommy. This is emphasized by the lit dining table, which draws even more attention because of the white decorations: the loft is a space to be distracted by, focus on or even flee into.
Now. This is what kickstarted my obsession with these scenes, especially the coming out scene. The chair between them? Buck reaches out to Eddie, leans his arm onto it and in the process drawing attention to it. He actually leaves his arm there for an extended period, throughout several of the following shots, and only seems to pull back when he says he and Tommy were on a date.
The following shots – of Buck’s coming out and Eddie’s initial response – are back and forth POV shots. The first shot from medium distance, is this:
Do you see it. DO YOU SEE IT. Do you see what drives me crazy! Eddie is mirroring Buck’s earlier posture – also this is immediately after Buck says Tommy left him on the curb (i.e. Eddie realizes there’s no Tommy getting between them). Eddie’s not just opened up, he’s reaching out, extending his arm back onto that empty chair between them. And again, like Buck, he leaves it there for several shots. It’s still there when he tells Buck to call Tommy, although he briefly vaguely gestures to himself during the “He’ll love you! We all do!” It’s not clear when he takes his arm away; no shots show it and then he’s getting up.
This just. This drives me insane.
For comparison, Buck doesn’t reach out to Tommy during the BU scene. And, compare Tommy to Eddie:
5. POV shots
Okay, the section header is a bit of a misnomer because the scene consists mostly of dialogue and therefore has POV shots. Like I said, there’s also overlap between the POV shots and the wider establishing shots I used in section 4. The bulk of this part of the scene, however, shows a lot of over the shoulder close ups with quick POV switches. In both cases, this is where the subject at the heart of the scene is discussed.
Now, these differences are pretty small and they could be a consequence of these episodes having different directors. However, there’s zero doubt in my mind that Chad Lowe closely studied the CO scene for its sheer number of cinematographic parallels and therefore it might be entirely on purpose too YAY.
There’s some variation in the distance of these shots, but the most intimate ones look like this:
(Still not over that face he’s pulling here, dear Lord). Buck takes up most of the screen – his shoulders are visible, but the top of his head isn’t. I guess this is technically still an over the shoulder shot, but barely. Eddie is out of focus, just enough there to be a blurry ear. These shots are intimate. This is almost what Eddie is seeing – and actually these shots make it feel like they’re sitting a lot closer than they actually are.
"Until now.” Buck’s entire face (including hair) is in the shot, and we can see Tommy’s shirt. This is the closest/most intimate we get to see him (and Tommy, in reverse). For both sides, they’re very clear over the shoulder shots. Yes, this is intimate – but it is not intimate. A quarter to a third of the screen (esp as the conversation moves on) is dedicated to the other person. Buck is more visually interesting too. He has more colour in his face and his background is more clearly white than in CO, whereas Tommy blends in more with the brown coat rack background (shout-out to @sparklespiff for pointing out that difference while I was trying to figure out why Buck felt more noticeable, btw).
SIDENOTE: I know some posts have already been made about the pictures on Buck’s fridge and Eddie’s mantelpiece, like they seem thematically relevant (or perhaps not yet, but soon). Buck’s walls in general have more pictures on them in S8, which is evident both in Buck’s background and Tommy’s. I am nowhere near talented enough to identify them, but going by their general colour and composition, I believe all of Buck’s wall art pieces are that, art, not family photos.
6. Eddie and Tommy leaving
These scenes have some of the clearest parallels, and of course an incredibly clear difference in how Eddie and Tommy are leaving Buck.
CO: Eddie leaves not because of Buck (well, not technically), but because he has to go do something: “I gotta go talk to Marisol.” Buck is smiling while Eddie gets up and is on his way out. Of course, this is when Eddie stops, turns around, and Buck looks up. In fact, Eddie says “Come here” but he’s the one to walk up to Buck to give him a hug. Buck just stands up from the chair. During the hug, we get shots of both Eddie’s and Buck’s faces, and of course Eddie holding Buck’s shoulder. When Eddie leaves, we hear the door open and shut – the focus stays on Buck.
Again, when Tommy leaves, we only hear the door while the camera cuts to Buck. The show then picks up his response (with the same expression) during his arrival at Eddie’s, where Eddie lets him into his home.
BU: Of course, Tommy has nowhere he needs to go to (hello, return of the failed cinema date) – when he says “I should go” it is because of his conversation with Buck. There’s a medium wide shot of him getting up while Buck looks confused, looking like he’s about to reach out for Tommy – the first time during their conversation. The camera uses a slow dolly to the left, which is when Buck calls back Tommy to ask for clarification: “Did you just break up with me?” Tommy says, ���Yeah, I guess I just did.” This has been pointed out before, but they’re clearly not sure. Tommy also says, “Believe me, I didn’t see it coming either.” (Was LFJ speaking from Tommy’s perspective in that interview?). That line is fascinating, actually, because only moments ago, he was incredibly adamant about being Buck’s first, not his last. This feels like a throwback to “Enjoy it while it lasts,” leaving them both overwhelmed/confused.
Look at how similar these shots are! Also, the reason I was adamant about calling these scenes mirrors and not parallels is because Buck and Tommy greet each other with a moment of physical affection (which, as I mentioned before, is incredibly short and barely visible). Eddie wouldn’t have ordinarily but feels it’s important to hug Buck to show him nothing has changed. In terms of meaning and cinematography, their interaction is a lot more substantial and reciprocal. They’re also making sure to leave on good terms – whereas Buck and Tommy meet on good terms, but part essentially as strangers. Buck and Tommy ending the scene like truly feels like an end. Buck and Eddie’s scene feels like a significant shift in their relationship, and for me part of that is a result of Eddie hugging Buck, and shaking up their routine.
7. Miscellany
Just some bits and bobs I couldn’t fit elsewhere in the analysis!
“I like him too. Just not the same way as you.” 7x05 was truly out there foreshadowing 8x06’s “I am not gay.” (I want to do a full 7x04 + 7x05 parallels post at some point, but that’s going to be a fuckload of work and possibly even larger than this post).
Like I pointed out, Buck and Eddie drink beer during their scene (which they often do during their conversations). Buck and Tommy are breaking up without accoutrements. Of course, we know Buck brings over beer to Eddie after the breakup. Because the scenes mirror each other so closely in every other aspect, it feels incredibly poignant: Eddie again fills a role in Buck’s life Tommy should have had. I also figured I’d check their fake brands, and they are different labels. I would assume Buck brought a new flavour, considering Eddie’s looks.
Speaking of continuity, Buck opening the door to Tommy in a sense mirrors Eddie opening the door to Buck at the end of 8x06. The key differences in their cinematography is that during BU, the establishing shot of the entire scene is of the closed door without a peephole shot. When Eddie opens the door, it follows his Risky Business tribute so the door takes up less presence, and even when it’s closed, Buck is clearly visible through the peephole.
Phones clearly are connected to (past) female love interests; Eddie is interacting with Marisol but it’s through text and impersonal – we don’t see the messages, we just hear Eddie complain. On the other hand, Buck is out of contact with Abby but he still treasures that relationship – otherwise he wouldn’t still have those pictures on his phone after 7 years. I guess that’s kind of cute? Idk, I never really liked Abby or how she treated Buck, but Tommy’s speech has turned me into an Abby defender lol
Like Buck, Maddie also stands at the head of the kitchen island during her conversation with Chimney. Chimney’s in the kitchen proper, though, and Maddie walks up to him so they can actually stand face to face and be happy about the new pregnancy together! (I genuinely missed that scene the first time I watched the episode, I was so caught up in the bones of it all SORRY MADNEY I LOVE YOU FOREVER).
8. Final thoughts
I mean. Are we really surprised? I’m not! Actually that’s a lie. I saw the similarities but was shocked at just how close these scenes are in full. However,I do think this scene in particular does a lot to show just how deliberate these parallels between S7 and S8 are (and between S8 and previous seasons in general – we’ve seen similar/near identical cinematography a couple of times now), and how deliberate the parallels are between Eddie and Tommy (who are literally taking up the same position in these two scenes).
And just. The fact it’s the coming out scene between Buck and Eddie, which was about opening up & telling the truth, and it doesn’t change anything (allegedly), versus Buck and Tommy, which is about opening up & telling the truth, which changes everything... it reaffirms how I feel about the coming out scene – this is a major moment of change, and that change is deeply entwined with their respective romantic relationships. AAAAAAAAAAHHH!!
#911#911 meta#my meta#buddie#anti bucktommy#(mostly for posterity most of this is written to be tommy neutral)#im gonna get a phd in buddie some day#just you wait
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One of the worst things to ever happen to me because fuck it, I need to vent:
My german teacher once accused me of plagiarism on an assignment when I was in 10th grade. It wasn‘t graded and during the lockdown, so I spent a lot of time on it out of boredom. It still makes me feel kind of sad and betrayed. I liked her before that. And she didn‘t even explain why she thought I got my parents to write it for me. She didn’t even make sure that it was in private, other classmates heard it. The only person I‘ll ever unironically call bitch tbh. Still kinda fucks me up, and it‘s been years.
it's so weird to me that everyone on this website is a human person outside of their weird internet niche so rb this with a random bit of your lore
#still kinda wish i had a way of telling her how much it still affects me#we had a talk with my parents and a neutral teacher afterwards but like#i proved that i didnt have it necessary to cheat with the next exam#and nothing. no apology#it doesnt give me nightmares but#i kinda wish it did#cause then id have proof that it genuinely bothers me#beyond still thinking and feeling badly about it
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ಬ different kind of normal
pairing: idol!taehyun x fem!reader
genre: angst, smut — mdni! wc: 1.7k
contains: situationship, reunion sex, sub!reader, slight hint of dumbification, slight dacryphilia, unprotected sex, dirty talk, pet names, reader is emotional and cries during sex, not a happy ending (?)
a/n: this has been sitting in the drafts since august and it’s finally seeing the light of day. cannot believe such angsty smut is happening on joocomics, tbh i don’t think i’ll be writing anything similar anytime soon phew it was tricky and i realised that i need my happy endings. but i wanted to try smth new, i really hope you enjoy it </3 sometimes you just need a kim taehyun to numb your emotions
You go down the familiar stairs and walk into the bar. It’s loud, lit by the usual dim yellow-ish lights, the scent of alcohol and skin is covering every corner, wrapping around your silhouette.
Your eyes observe the place to search for him and it doesn’t take long to find him - he’s sitting on your usual spot which is distanced from every other table; it feels intimate and secluded.
None of the people who visit this bar know who he is, nor do they know you, and sitting on this specific table every time you see each other only enhances the feeling you get in these moments - like you and him are the only people existing in this place and time.
“Taehyun,” you greet him at once.
You haven’t said his name out loud in so long. You’re not allowed to talk about him to anyone; not that you want to anyway, you want to keep him to yourself though it feels nice to be able to roll it off your tongue again. It feels freeing, especially in his presence.
Maybe he missed hearing his name in your voice, because his eyes smile at the sound before he even turns to face you. The letters ring nicely, like his name is something he can feel caressing his skin when you’re the one saying it.
“You’re here.” He automatically leans forward after you sit down next to him; the usual gravitational force that always pulls you together is another thing he was anticipating to experience again.
His one arm goes over your shoulders and the sudden warmth enveloping you makes your knees weak. The truth is, they were already weak from the steps you had to take to reach your table, but now they feel like they’re about to melt.
Being so close to him months later feels like it’s your first date all over again. You hate it and love it all at the same time.
“I just ordered your favorite,” he says and you can hear the slight note of pride in his smooth voice.
His hair is covered from a black cap which he eventually takes off before running a hand through his hair; it grabs your attention with a new color that you haven’t seen him with in person before.
You point out the obvious fact about how he still remembers your order as you take a minute to observe the attractive features that make up the face you learned to love.
“Of course I do,” he simply replies, leaning in for a kiss.
The first kiss after three and a half months. It feels so exciting and electrifying, just like the very first one you had a year ago, but at the same time it feels familiar too - like you’re reminiscing on a comforting memory you haven’t looked back on for a while.
His hand slides up your thigh, then travels up your hip only to sneak in discreetly beneath your shirt, sending you pleasant shockwaves. Soon enough he breaks the kiss though, careful not to bring any unnecessary attention on you.
“Next month I’m gonna have a week off.” Taehyun speaks up after a moment of silence between the two of you. After a sip of his beer, he continues: “I was thinking that you can come visit me if you want.”
Yes… Yes. You do. You want to scream it out loud. But the only thing you do is breathe in, staring inside the cup of your cocktail; trying to force yourself to speak before your mind turns blank.
“You don’t need to worry about money,” he adds as he shifts his gaze to you, hopeful and anticipating of your response. “It’s all on me, baby.”
There it is - the reminder you needed before giving any answers. His money, his fame. His life that’s so unfitting to yours. The pink balloon you found yourself in for a moment as he shared about his plan, tempting you to naively build dreams about your one week together, it pops, and brings you back to the harsh reality.
“Tae…” You shake head, “no matter what we do or tell each other we can’t be normal.”
Taehyun’s brows furrow at your choice of word.
Normal.
“This has to end at some point, I don’t think we should complicate things any further… as we’ve already said before.” You exhale deeply after blurting out the things you’ve been practicing on your way here. He didn’t hear the sound that escaped your lips because of the music mixed with the chatter, but if he did, he’d have known that saying all of this cost you an immense amount of energy.
You don’t glance at him even once, but Taehyun on the other hand can’t stop staring at you like he’s in some sort of a bad dream that’ll end soon if he’s patient enough.
“Right, right…” He nods, finally able to force his eyes somewhere else. He peers down at his hands on the table that begin to tap nervously at the wooden surface, sharing almost the same rhythm as his heartbeat. “You’re right, that’s the wisest thing to do.”
You know it is, but hearing him agree turns out to be more painful than you expect.
For the best, this has to end soon, you remind yourself. Maybe not tonight, but tomorrow.
“I missed you,” Taehyun rises your body temperature through raspy whispers and open mouthed kisses which he scatters onto your skin almost in a rush; as if you’re going to disappear from his hands if he dares to slow down. “Missed you so fuckin’ much...”
His soft lips trace a path from your neck down to your cleavage and soon enough he’s even lower, running his tongue against your stomach before kissing that area sensually too. The slight moisture slipping from the corners of his mouth in addition to the delicate sucks makes you shudder as he simultaneously tugs on your underwear.
“Missed this sweet pussy too,” he invites his fingers into your walls effortlessly. His gaze focuses upon your lips and how they open for a silent gasp as he glides through with ease because of your already collected arousal. “Did she miss me?”
While anticipating an answer, Taehyun swirls his tongue inside his mouth before letting a string of saliva fall right onto your clit; he smears it all over your folds, provoking your thighs to open even wider for him.
“Tae—“ You arch spine, emphasising your need for something more than this lingering rush that’s growing in a pace that’s not quite enough for how much you ache for his touch right now. “Please…”
“I think she did.” A lustful spark shimmers in his eyes as his hand maintains its delicate motions. The movements make you moan every time his fingertips reach your sensitive bundle of nerves before slipping back down again. “Say it.”
At once he meets your eyes as his frame eventually hovers over your naked flushed body.
Your hands relax on his broad shoulders as your focus fixates on his face. Hopefully there’s not as much pain into your eyes as there is in your heart in this moment. You don’t want him to know how much exactly you’re actually hurting.
“I missed you every day,” you whisper softly as your noses touch; your mouths search for each other, thirsty for the other’s taste even more now. When you feel his hand guiding his cock to your entrance your breathing catches, but you still manage to repeat it. “Of course, I missed you.”
The second he hears your words, Taehyun crashes his lips against your mouth. Because he cannot bare hearing this one more time or because he enjoys the sound of it too much - he’s not able to tell.
As he leads the kiss swiftly your legs wrap loosely around his hips and your warm walls immediately squeeze onto him as he quickens the pace, eager to make up for all the time you were away from each other.
“Fuck—“ He grunts at the growing pleasure that he reminisced about night after night before breathing out against your neck: “Finally… I swear to god nobody else can make me feel this way.”
His voice, husky and domineering despite his on going confessions, echoes in your fuzzy mind. Although you shouldn’t, you put in all the effort you can into memorising each word he says; you hold onto it tightly as the continuous thrusts gradually turn more rigid and sharp causing your nails to sink into his shoulder blades. However, as amazing the buzzing sweet wave inside you feels, you cannot suppress the sadness that’s about to overpower you first.
You swallow another failed attempt to fight back the bitter emotion, but you can feel it lingering everywhere - in your heart, inside your stomach, on your tongue once he slows down his hips to grip your face, and inside your throat that feels like it’s closing up.
“Why are you crying?”
Taehyun peers into your eyes that are sparkling at him with a bittersweet emotion which he hasn’t gotten used to seeing inside them. His gaze lowers to your puffy lips, trembling as they separate with hesitation.
“I… I don’t know what’s gotten to me, sorry,” your arms wrap tighter to pull him closer. His thumb caressing your wet cheek only makes it worse for you. “Please, k-keep going.”
“Sweetheart,” he whispers under his breath as he fulfills your wish by resuming his thrusts - more forcefully though to distract you from the sorrow, “I’ll make it go away now, okay? Focus on me, baby.”
You grasp his shoulders while the delight starts to numb your mind with each intense push of his cock. The hits against your sweet spot are fast and strong enough to weaken your memory right away.
“There you go,” Taehyun’s pants blend with your whimpers ringing beneath him as the tears on your skin begin to dry. “Such pretty eyes, look at me, love.”
Something about seeing you cry for the first time made his heart clench, and now his mind fogs up, leaving him with only one goal - to make you cum as many times as possible so you can’t think of anything for the rest of the night.
Right now, he’d erase every single thought from your brain if he knows he’s capable of doing so.
The moment he feels you’re tightening up Taehyun’s eyes open so he doesn’t miss out on one flinch of yours.
“Yeah, I’m here, baby,” he murmus, trying to keep moving forward while your peak lasts, causing you to quiver beneath his frame. “Let go, baby, I’m right here.”
Yes, he’s here, and tomorrow morning he’s still going to be here, but you’ll be gone, because this time if he tries to stop you like all the previous times, you’re not going to look back.
But for now, you and Taehyun are close as you’ve never been before.
! please do not repost, copy or translate my works
! please keep in mind that english is not my first language. i apologise for any mistakes i’ve might missed
#— writing: txt#txt smut#txt hard thoughts#txt hard hours#taehyun smut#taehyun hard thoughts#tomorrow x together smut#txt x reader#txt angst#taehyun x reader
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Hello! I saw your Toby headcanons, and as a Toby fan, I'd love some platonic Toby headcanons, if that's possible? Just kinda wanna see how he'd act with a friend that gets him, y'know? Thank you so much ^0^
𝐓𝐢𝐜𝐜𝐢 𝐓𝐨𝐛𝐲 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 !!
𝘈/𝘯: ofc !! I loooove writing for Toby hehe
𝘞𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴: None :*:·\( ̄▽ ̄)/·:*·°★*
──★ ˙ ̟ 𝘚𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨??
☆• Honestly it'd probably take a while to actually befriend good 'ol Toby, but it's very worth it once you do !!
☆• Chaotic, but fun (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧
☆• After missions he practically busts down your door and makes himself comfortable in your bed, yapping about his day and what happened during his mission for a while before deciding to watch random YouTube videos on your TV... Yeah, safe to say he's comfortable with you.
☆• Naturally, sleepovers happen a lot because he'll end up falling asleep
☆• BUT !1!!! If it's a planned one he's pulling all nighters with you (๑·̀ㅁ·́๑)✧
☆• Would find the silly 2010 quotev quizzes and tests funny, def engages in them with you
☆• Takes a "Which creepypasta character is your boyfriend?" one and gets himself 😭😭
☆• Deep talks late at night just about life and what he can remember from before.. only time he ever really does open up (even if he's still somewhat vague about certain stuff)
☆• INSIDE JOKES. He's a sucker for those
☆• Yes, the other pastas look at you two funny when he says a random word and you burst out into a fit of giggles, him trying (and failing) to hold back his own
☆• You guys have a secret and way too complex handshake you never fail to greet each other with
𝐏𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐳𝐞, 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 ◟( ˃̶͈◡ ˂̶͈ )◞
ᯓ★ 𝐣𝐮𝐧𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐠𝐠𝐲
#asks open#x reader#ticci toby x reader headcanons#ticci toby headcanons#ticci toby fluff#creepypasta#creepypasta x reader#creepypasta headcanon#ticci toby#creepypasta headcanons#ticci toby x you#ticci toby headcanon#crp#tobias rogers#tobias rogers x reader#toby rodgers x reader#toby rogers x reader#toby rodgers#toby rogers#ticci toby x reader#ticci toby creepypasta#creepypasta x you#creepypasta fluff#creepypasta fandom
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— DECEPTION (VIII)
DECEPTION MASTERLIST
PAIRING — Sauron x fem!Elf!Reader // Adar x fem!Elf!Reader
SUMMARY — Your conversation with Lady Galadriel makes you realise a very difficult truth about the nature of your relationship with Sauron. You wish to keep your dark secret from your husband but you are trying to make him realise that perhaps attacking Eregion might not be the best idea after all.
AUTHOR’S NOTE — I could not wait to write this chapter from the very beginning the idea for this fic showed up in my head. Even though the Reader is not really talking much during the scene with Galadriel (it was never my intention for her to talk there much), the conversation she is witnessing makes her realise all the things that make her deeply uncomfortable and cause her whole life's purpose to shatter. 👌🏽👌🏻 This fic is slowly coming to an end, by the way.
WARNINGS — forced/arranged marriage, Reader is NOT a good person – she is proud, greedy, fake and corrupted by Sauron, "love" triangle situationship
WORD COUNT — 6,900
ENGLISH IS MY SECOND LANGUAGE.
DECEPTION (VIII)
Everyone knew who Lady Galadriel was. Not just the Elves but nearly every being in Middle-earth, including the Orcs because she had slayed so many of them. In fact, you were sure that some Uruk mothers were telling their children scary stories about Lady Galadriel. Known for carrying so much light and beauty and yet so fiercely determined to purge Middle-earth from all filth. In a way, she reminded you of Sauron in this.
Lady Galadriel was everything you had wished to be back in the day – known, respected, beautiful beyond comparison. Back in the day when you had remained incorrupt by your lover, before you had begun to dream about becoming his terrific Queen and rule alongside him. Now you could not care less about her qualities because you had your own – very often contradicting hers.
You walked together with your husband amongst the Orcs as the night was slowly turning into a foggy day and you could already see Eregion from afar.
The sight alone was gut-twisting to you because you knew that your beloved was there – so close to you. Soon, you would be in his arms as his Queen. No more secrets, no more hiding, no more lies.
But when you imagined that, your heart ached for the man walking by your side. What would happen to him then? You were certain Sauron wanted Adar dead but you… You did not.
You could never admit it to your lover, though. He was jealous and possessive. It would only make him want Adar’s death even more. And he had other reasons than you – his own revenge. The revenge you craved as well after all. Adar had been the one to take Sauron away from you by killing and humiliating him. He had his own reasons to do it, too, though. The situation between them was very delicate and difficult on many levels.
Your plan had been so easy at first – to play pretend and hand Adar out to Sauron on a silver plate. But your heart – not as rotten as you’d like it to be – kept complicating things.
“How well do you know Galadriel?” Your husband asked you and you turned your head around to raise an eyebrow.
“Not much personally. I have seen her a few times, talked to her twice maybe, except for the official affairs since I was a daughter of the Lord Guardian of The Southlands. But she mostly resided in the North, therefore there were never many occasions,” you explained. “Why?”
“I was only wondering if you might be useful when we negotiate with her,” Adar told you and you tilted your head.
“I have a feeling you hide something from me. Why did you even take her as a prisoner?” You furrowed your brows. “You promised me… You promised me that we would be equals and that you would tell me everything,” you reminded him.
Adar stopped walking for a moment and you stopped, too, staring at him and trying to show off your best hurt expression. The Orcs kept passing you by and glancing from the corners of their eyes when your husband extended his hand to hold yours.
“I have no secrets from you,” he assured you. “But I am so used to loneliness, I forget to share my thoughts often,” he admitted. “Galadriel might be our ally. She is after Sauron, is she not?” He asked and you nodded, squeezing his hand back.
“She devoted her life to fight him and other forces of darkness,” you replied. “But we are the very forces of darkness. What makes you think she is going to treat with us?”
“If she does not, we might use her. It is her who is our prisoner, not the other way around,” Adar smirked and pointed his chin in the direction where he wanted you to follow him – where some of the Orcs were already toying with Lady Galadriel, recently released out of her cage and the others were busy building a war camp for your army to reside.
When you approached them, you spotted Glûg holding his dagger close to Galadriel’s face. It suddenly made you realise how you truly became one of them – how it was nearly impossible to imagine any of the Orcs to ever turn against you the same way. From being scared of falling asleep around them, you walked confidently amongst them and you even dared to scold them sometimes as they would look down shyly.
In their eyes, you surely were no Elf anymore – not in the same way Galadriel was.
Adar stopped Glûg by putting his hand on the Orc’s arm and shaking his head as Glûg walked away, a little frustrated. Lady Galadriel’s beautiful, bright eyes found yours and she seemed to be pretty fascinated. Therefore, you straightened your back.
And after a very short while of holding each other’s gazes, she suddenly took out a dagger that had been hidden discreetly in her sleeve and pointed it at your husband. The Orcs around you groaned at that as they became alarmed and so did you – you let out a small yelp as your heart skipped a beat and your hand already grabbed the hilt of your sword. Even though you knew that you would never be an opponent worthy enough of her when it came to sword duels.
Galadriel turned around, moving Adar alongside her. And now her blade was pressed to his neck as Glûg jumped in front of you to cover you with his own body just in case.
Yes, you were definitely one of them now. Your light was all gone, your blood turned black and your skin turned cold. Valinor was awaiting you no more.
“I brought you here not as a prisoner…” Adar turned his face around to look at Galadriel as he spoke in the Sindarin language, “but as a potential ally for we share a common enemy.”
After a while of hesitation, Galadriel’s surprised eyes found yours behind Glûg. You nodded at her as if you were more trustworthy than your husband – in fact, you were less. But she did not know that and she still must have considered you to be sort of a friend. A friend enough to let go of Adar as the Orcs calmed down and you ran up to your husband to put your hands on his chest and cling to him, grateful that he was still in one piece. You knew how fierce Galadriel could be.
Adar caressed your back soothingly and you could feel her eyes on you, probably wondering about the nature of your relationship.
“Lady Galadriel, please, feel yourself invited…” Adar pointed at the biggest tent that had already been there, waiting for you two to sleep in. “Let us talk,” he added and you watched her hesitantly go inside.
Your husband followed and you began walking right after when you felt a strong pull towards Eregion. You turned around rapidly and kept staring at the forest, knowing very well that behind them the city stood and inside the city there he was – Sauron. Looking out and sensing your presence, looking out for you. You smiled to yourself and focused all your will and might to let him know that you were close and you would be reunited soon.
And with a heart so full of love for him and a brand new inspiration to carry on with your plan, you finally joined Adar and Galadriel inside the tent.
They were sitting on the opposite sides of the table as some female Orcs were bringing you food. It was a small feast in a way and you knew it was Adar’s way to make Galadriel feel like your guest indeed. You took a seat next to him and put a small portion on your plate before beginning to eat it. Adar’s portion was much bigger than yours but Galadriel’s was none. Her plate remained empty and she just kept sitting there and staring at the two of you, which was awkward in a way but you tried to ignore her.
You wondered if Sauron knew about her. Was she also a part of his plan or was she an obstacle he had no idea of? You could not decide for yourself, therefore, for now, you decided to just sit there and observe how the situation would evolve.
Eventually, she just could not hold herself back no more as she addressed you.
“Lady (Y/N) of The Southlands… Your mother arrived in Lindon some time ago,” Galadriel spoke and you looked up at her, immediately. The mention of your mother made your heart clench.
“Then you must be surprised to see me,” you smirked, “for I have instructed her to speak of me as dead.”
“On the contrary,” Galadriel raised an eyebrow at you in a challenging manner and you furrowed your brows. “She has told the High King everything.”
You clenched your jaw and gritted your teeth, nervously looking at Adar but he only nodded at you to calm you down and soothe you.
“Then you know what treachery my father was capable of,” you answered, avoiding her gaze. You did not want her to see the betrayal you felt after your mother’s broken promise.
“And what treachery you were capable of as well,” Galadriel nodded.
“My mother blames me for the fall of Ostirith, but I had no idea of it. It was no scheme of mine,” you finally met her gaze again. This time you didn’t care if she could see the pain on your face or not because it was too big to hide it anyway. “Why can she not trust her own daughter?”
“She loves you but she does not believe you,” Galadriel informed you. “She revealed to the High King that there had been something rotten about you for a while now. Ever since you had returned from Eregion–”
“Stop it!” You banged your fist on the table, angrily.
“Be at ease, she is provoking you,” Adar’s voice was calm as he put his hand on your arm to give you comfort. Then he shot Galadriel a glance.
You nodded at your husband and relaxed, which made her roll her eyes a bit.
“You seem to quite fit in. Even the sword you carry is Morgoth’s,” Galadriel pointed out.
“I had to fit in to survive. Something a grand lady like you has never known and will never know,” you remarked.
Adar seemed to be a little frustrated with your girly chit-chat as he leaned back on his chair and sighed. He raised a hand to shush you both since he wanted to finally speak of the matters that were the most important to him.
“We must not argue now,” he reminded you two and then, after a short while of silence, he looked at Galadriel. “During my brief time in your capture, you seemed intent on finding Sauron. One might even say, consumed by it,” he told her and Galadriel looked down.
You leaned back on your chair as well, with your hands clasped on your abdomen as you observed her reactions.
“The way one always is, once he has wormed his way inside your mind,” Adar kept talking and his eyes were on Galadriel. Her own eyes were rather glancing down, avoiding his gaze. Therefore, your own eyes were allowed to wander and for that you were grateful. His words about your beloved were making you feel deeply uncomfortable.
“You know nothing of my mind,” Galadriel replied to that and a smug expression lit up her face. “You yielded to him. I resisted.”
Resisted?
You swallowed a lump in your throat. What was she talking about? Since when was she ever so close to Sauron to be offered anything from him? Back in the First Age, the only time Galadriel had been mentioned by your lover was when he had been complaining about the Elven armies to you. She had never been any part of his plans – except for the one to get rid of her for once and for all.
And yes, you were aware that Galadriel had been the one to spend time with Halbrand in Númenor but you had never seen her as anything else but his tool. Was it possible that there had been more depth to their relationship? That he had shown her his soul and offered her a piece of it?
Did his soul not belong to you wholly?
“For a while, perhaps,” Adar remarked in a whisper. “But sooner or later, he sees you. Not just who you are, but who you wish to be,” he added and you clenched your jaw as you looked down to stare at your fingers.
You began to fidget with them nervously while you remembered your first meeting with Sauron. How luring and tempting he had been, how he had seemed to know perfectly well what had been your desires. And he had promised you to fulfil them all.
“His eyes bore a hole and the rest of him slithers in,” Adar kept talking and at that moment, his voice was starting to make you sick. It was becoming too much to hear all these things.
He had known Sauron – he had known him better than you in lots of ways. You were no young Elf but your husband was much older and he had known Sauron for a time much longer than you. They had fought together for Morgoth and then for themselves. The only thing you had been doing was warming your lover’s bed and listening to his sweet nothings.
And that… That was enough to make you become obsessed with him. To make you yearn for him each day and each night of your separation. To make you abandon all else – because only Sauron mattered.
“For a while, he even makes you believe that his power has become yours,” Adar kept his monologue and you took a deep breath. As you raised your chin, you spotted the look on Galadriel’s face…
The look that made you realise what the nature of her relationship with Sauron had to be…
You felt dizzy but you managed to keep an emotionless face on even though your mind began to drift away and get foggy.
“Irresistible power… that makes every desire’s fulfilment seem inevitable,” Adar smirked as he had noticed Galadriel’s facial expression as well. “An ocean of colour against which everything else feels forever thereafter–”
“A dull grey,” Galadriel admitted and you regretted eating your meal in an instant when the anxiety squeezed your stomach and you felt even more sick now.
It was her confession and the both of you knew it. You watched Adar’s face change its expression in an instant as he realised he had found an ally in her indeed – that they had both been deceived by Sauron in the past.
And you were sitting there, too. Like a fool.
“What did he promise you?” Adar asked Galadriel.
“An army,” she lied. Her eyes glistened and she shook her head and you knew – you just knew – that she lied.
You knew because you knew what it meant to love and trust Sauron. You knew what he was doing to a woman he had such a strong effect on and what it was like to share a bond with him. And all these things, you could see in her now, too.
It felt like a punch right into your gut, piercing you through and through, leaving you behind to bleed out slowly, drop by drop.
Was it possible that your lover… Your one and only, your whole purpose in life, your dream, your master, your King… That he was merely using you?
That you were nothing but one of many other women he had been finding a use for? And if Lady Galadriel was one of them – the Lady of Light – what chances did you stand? What was giving you any guarantee that it was her he had been deceiving and you that he had been genuine with?
The chances were zero.
Your whole world crumbled down in an instant and you could not let it show. You closed your eyes for a longer while and tried to focus on your fastened heartbeat instead.
“Do you want to know what he offered me?” Adar inquired.
“I care not,” Galadriel admitted.
“Children,” your husband answered anyway.
And how pure his wishes and desires seemed to be compared to you. You had been greedy, you had made Sauron promise you to make you his Queen. You had wanted to be worshipped and admired.
But now you were not so sure. Having a taste of it by being the Dark Lady of Mordor was truly making you realise what a burden and responsibility it was to lead others. Sometimes being Adar’s wife and watching over the Orcs seemed to be more than enough.
And then Sauron would slip back into your mind again… And you would be reminded once more what a great power you could have if you only dared to unleash it.
“Then it would seem he gave us both what we desired,” Galadriel pointed out.
“You see, it is not his lies which must be extinguished. It is him and I can help you do it,” Adar admitted and you felt a shiver go down your spine.
Despite everything you had just found out, you still felt awful whenever the possibility of Sauron’s death was being mentioned.
“I can help you destroy Sauron,” your husband leaned in over the table to reach Galadriel more effectively.
“What help could you possibly provide, Orc?” She snapped at him and it finally gave you an opportunity to glance at her with all your anger and jealousy that you had been feeling for a while now.
You had never cared much about that slur until now – because in her lips it sounded just so awful.
“Uruk,” you finally spoke, interrupting them as they both looked at you surprised. Whether they were shocked by the fact that you cared or they simply forgot you were there with them – you did not care.
You did not care about anything anymore. Your whole life, your whole love and devotion, your whole sacrifice – they might have been a lie. How could you care about anything or anyone?
Adar stood up and briefly caressed your cheek with his finger as he walked away from the table to approach the wooden chest with Morgoth’s crown. He took it out to show it off to Galadriel and as he walked towards her with the item, she seemed to be startled by its darkness.
“Morgoth’s crown… I was told–”
“There are many stories of what happened, after the Silmarils were pried from its settings. But I was there when Sauron re-fired it to fit himself,” Adar confessed and you kept listening as your lips nervously twitched and formed a sad smile as silent and dry tears streamed down your cheeks – they were invisible but you could feel that you were on the verge of crying. “I was there when he kneeled to be crowned and I was the one who used its power to slay him,” Adar continued his story.
Each time you were told it or you thought of it, you relieved it in your mind. You had not been there but you had enough imagination to see it with your eyes. And each time your heart weeped for your betrayed lover but it seemed to weep no more… Because you were a betrayed lover now.
Adar put the crown on the table in front of Galadriel and you looked down, hoping they would forget about your existence once more.
“If what you say is true, why did he return?” Galadriel asked.
Exactly. Why?
Until now, you had foolishly been thinking that perhaps you were one of the reasons. That the very thought of you had been keeping him strong. He had even mentioned such things when you had reunited with him in Mordor for a brief moment.
But now you could see it even more clearly – how cold and distant he had been to you while you had been the one to devour him after centuries of separation. Oh, what a fool you had been and how you had humiliated yourself…
“Because I had not yet found you,” Adar addressed Galadriel and you looked up angrily. You did not like his choice of words.
“What part am I to play in this?” Galadriel asked.
“It is said that the Three Elven Rings saved your kind from fading,” Adar told her. “Is it true?”
You wondered that, too. You had been with him when you both had received such “news” or rather “gossip” as you had thought of it back then. Lady Galadriel refused to answer, though, as she looked away.
“If it is, then perhaps together, this crown and your Rings would be powerful enough to truly destroy Sauron forever,” Adar informed her.
And once again you were torn – because even if it was true that Sauron had been using you and only that… If he was to be defeated, your whole life would lose its purpose. You had abandoned the Valar for him – your new and only god. If he truly stopped existing, a part of you would die with him surely. The part you had given away to him freely – nearly all of you.
“The Deceiver believes he is still beyond my grasp,” Adar continued, “but I know he hides in Eregion and I suspect you know for certain…” He hesitated with a smirk. “Halbrand is Sauron, isn't he?” He asked and you felt your blood turn even colder when you realised that your husband had seen through your lover’s disguise.
You had a feeling in your gut that he did but he had never told you anything about it, so you were hopeful it was only you being paranoid. But now, you were anxious again that he had seen through you as well.
Galadriel did not answer but what you saw on her face only proved to you once more that she loved the human king – one of your lover’s forms.
“The fate of that city now rests on your ability to put aside your pride,” Adar crouched down to look more intensely at Galadriel’s face. “I suggest you find the will to do so… If you can,” he added with contempt before standing up to take away Morgoth’s crown.
He returned to her to put her wrist in a shackle because she could not be trusted after her stunt with the dagger before but also – despite his sweet assurances – she was your prisoner.
“We will speak again,” your husband told her and offered you his hand to help you stand and leave with him but you shook your head. Adar nodded and left you two alone.
Long while of silence occurred between you two, in which you were debating with yourself on how much to reveal.
“An army,” you mocked her and she furrowed her brows at you. “He promised you to be his Queen,” you added and finally stood up to leave the table even though your legs were weak and trembling, which you managed to hide. You approached Galadriel slowly and leaned in to be face-to-face with the most beautiful of the Elven women.
“You reek of an Orc,” she pointed out and you laughed at that. It was nearly adorable how she was trying to change the subject.
And, you had to admit, the only good thing coming out of this whole situation was to have her at your mercy. To toy with her was your greatest pleasure – to feel in control and to feel even more powerful. There was a time you had wanted to impress her but now you were disgusting her and it brought you nothing but satisfaction.
“How can you know anyway?” She asked as she met your gaze eventually, after a while of feeling your intense eyes on her and realising you were not willing to change the subject at all.
“I am gifted with an extraordinary intuition,” you teased. “Oh, how pathetic you must feel now… To know that Sauron himself offered you to be his Queen and you considered it for a while. What does that make you? Do you think you are worthy of all your titles now, Lady of Light?” You asked with contempt.
“And were you not offered the same?” Galadriel asked and your heart skipped a beat as your smirk froze. Did she…? Did she know…?
“What are you talking about?!” You barked at her, angrily, as you straightened your back.
“Adar,” she explained and you breathed out of relief. “Did he not promise you the crown? You accepted it. How does that make you feel? What does it make you?”
“He does not wish to be a King and I do not aspire to be a Queen by his side,” you informed Galadriel, which was no lie. “What we wish for is a home. You can pretend to be so righteous and strong amongst your kin, Lady Galadriel, but you and I know how weak you truly are,” you smirked and left the tent.
It was suffocating you at this point. The air inside of it, her intense gaze, the words spoken. You wanted to breathe in the forest and gather your thoughts because there were so many as your heart was broken into a million pieces.
You stared once more at the trees, in the direction of Eregion, and you wanted to reach out to Sauron but he was not answering, probably too busy with his schemes. The fact was – he never answered your calls. If there were any glimpses of the connection between your minds, it was always him initiating it.
“What are you thinking of?” You heard Adar’s voice behind you as he put his arm on your shoulder. “You seem to be upset.”
“I… I think we should go back home,” you turned around to face him now instead of the trees, Eregion and Sauron inside of it. And at the sight of Adar’s scarred face, your heart suddenly filled in with warmth.
“What do you mean?” Your husband furrowed his brows. “Were you not the one convincing me eagerly about marching to Eregion with our army?”
“Yes, but I am not so sure anymore. Please, trust my gut. Something has changed, I am not sure… I have a bad feeling,” you grabbed him by his sleeves as you clenched your fists around the fabric, desperately. Your eyes were looking up to meet his blue ones in a pleading manner and he was staring at you with so much devotion that you were sure he still had no idea of who you truly were despite finding out the truth about Halbrand.
Perhaps it was better this way. Perhaps it should stay this way. You wanted to go back to Mordor – to that godforsaken place you had turned into your new home recently. You wanted to live in peace and safety there alongside Adar. And you were not even sure if Sauron would ever come looking for you. He would eventually show up to get his revenge and his army but perhaps you would be able to prepare for it in time. But you doubted he would come there for you.
“I know the vision of this battle is unsettling to you,” Adar cupped your face gently, “and that you wish to be back home – so do I. We shall,” he nodded. “We shall go home but not until Sauron is defeated,” he reminded you and you smiled sadly.
It was a trap and you could not make him see it… You would have to reveal your part in it for him to realise it and that was something you were not ready for. So, instead, you went for something else.
“Can you hold me?” You asked and Adar was a little surprised but he did not say anything. “I want to feel safe.”
“Of course,” he nodded and wrapped his arms around you. You clinged to him like a little girl, wishing that you could freeze time.
To beg and plead for Adar to turn his army back after all the weeks of convincing him that it had been a good idea to march towards Eregion would be highly suspicious now. But you knew that the game was over anyway – it was too late to make him realise it was a trap without telling him the truth. And perhaps even after finding out about your purpose by his side, he would still decide to attack the Elven city.
You spent a whole day wandering around the forest nearby the camp. You found a tree that had fallen over and you sat under it, feeling the grass under your hands. In a way, you wished you had not found out the truth about being Sauron’s puppet – most likely.
Most likely, because you wanted to believe – you truly did – that his devotion and love towards you were true. However, if you started to believe that, wouldn’t that make you an even bigger fool?
You had ruined your maidenhood, your family and your home for him. And now you would ruin your new family, too. You would hand him out Adar to be killed and his children to become Sauron’s slaves. And what would you get in return? A dagger in your back since you would not be useful anymore? Or a crown? Would he truly give you any real power?
You were not even so sure if you wanted it, after all.
Tears streamed down your cheeks. Real, genuine tears. Because, for the first time in a long while, you did not know what to do – until now you had been waiting for Sauron, living for Sauron, worshipping Sauron. And now you were stripped of your faith and of your god but you still remained his servant. How could you stop it? You couldn’t even pray to the Valar anymore to help you – they would not listen to a fallen Elf.
When you heard a noise behind you, you suspected it would be Adar. But no, it was Glûg. You quickly sniffled your tears back and wiped your cheeks before cracking a smile at him.
“My Lady?” He asked, unsurely as he tilted his head at the sight of your tears.
“Yes, Uruk?” You asked him, trying to hide the deep amount of your sadness.
“Lord Father is looking for you,” he told you and you nodded before getting up and approaching him to go back to the camp.
“It is a pretty area of the forest, is it not?” You tried to ask him while pretending to be cheerful.
“I guess,” he shrugged his arms. He kept staring at you intensely with his small eyes. “Why are you sad, Dark Lady?”
“I already mourn all the Uruks that will die in the upcoming battle,” you smiled sadly at him.
How easy it was to spit out such soothing lies. It was not like you didn’t care what would happen to them – you had grown used to being around them. But it was also not like you truly mourned for them. However, such a lie rolled off of your tongue without much thought put into it.
Sauron had taught you well. But this time you felt bad about it instead of being proud about it.
Glûg nodded his head at you, sadly. That was when you entered the camp again and you spotted Adar amongst his children, explaining something to them. You ran up to him and wrapped your hands around his arm. He smiled adoringly at you.
“Come with me, let me show you,” you tried to convince him and you could see him hesitate. There was not much time to waste but he eventually agreed with a sigh and allowed you to walk him out of the camp.
You were starting to become his weakness.
You took him back to where Glûg had found you. It was truly a very beautiful place in the forest; so green and calm. The light was creeping in through the trees and you smiled at your husband as you caressed his cheeks and brushed his hair strands behind his pointy ears.
“Something about you in this light makes me believe I could truly be good once again,” Adar whispered to you in the Quenya language and you felt your heart clench inside your chest.
How could you betray him…?
“Damn the good. And damn the evil. Let us just be ourselves,” you answered. “Let us go home…”
“You know that we cannot. Not until he is no more,” your husband carefully and gently held your wrists to lower them away from his face. He placed soft kisses upon the palms of your hands and caressed them.
“Why do we have to come for him? Why can he not come for us? We could fight him in our own land, on our own terms,” you tried to convince him. “You know that this feeling in my gut… It is never wrong.”
“Yet it often changes its mind,” Adar smirked at that and you sighed.
You even opened your mouth, gathering courage to confess the truth in this beautiful place but the moment you were about to admit your sins, the very same courage abandoned you.
“It is beautiful here and I know you yearn for peace but we must go back,” Adar let go of one of your hands to caress your cheek with his rough fingertips. “You are the most beautiful lady in all Middle-earth,” he added in the Quenya language and you furrowed your brows at that when you began walking back to the camp.
“Where did it come from?” You asked with a nervous chuckle.
“I could sense your jealousy when I spoke with Lady Galadriel,” he answered. “As if her beauty could ever match yours.”
“You must be blind then, my poor Adar. She is known for being the fairest of the Elven ladies,” you shook your head but a playful sparkle lit up your eyes.
“That is an easy kind of beauty and I do not seek easiness in anything,” your husband answered with all seriousness.
And the thing with Adar was that you just knew that his words were genuine and they were not prepared beforehand with some hidden agenda.
It was dark already when Adar and you were informed that Lady Galadriel was ready to speak again. You went back inside your tent where she had been kept for a whole day and you stood in front of her, still sitting on the chair.
“Yes. Halbrand is Sauron,” Galadriel started as the silence was growing heavy between you all. Your jaw twitched slightly as it clenched at her words. “He’s in Eregion to craft Rings that will allow him to dominate my kind. And yours.”
“Every kind in Middle-earth,” Adar added.
“But he will not attempt escape until his task is complete,” Galadriel laid her eyes upon you now. “And that gives us a momentary advantage.”
“Us?” You raised an eyebrow at her
Galadriel moved her hand in shackles and looked back at your husband, angrily.
“Unlock me,” she ordered.
Adar looked at you and you nodded at him even though you were not sure if it was a good idea to do so. He approached her to unchain her and she kept glancing at him with a mix of anger but also curiosity.
“As we speak, Elrond hastens from Lindon with an army of Elves,” she revealed. “And Nenya – my Ring.”
“I see,” Adar turned around to join your side again.
“Once he arrives, he will seal off the city,” Galadriel stood up as she spoke, “loose Celebrimbor from Sauron’s grasp, and then together, Uruks, you and I will eradicate all trace of Sauron from this world. Never to return,” she finished.
Uruks. You had been told by her or by your lover that you reeked of them. But you had never been called one.
“And what then?”Adar asked.
“Any Rings that have known his touch must be destroyed,” Galadriel stated.
“I meant, what then for the Uruk?” Adar furrowed his brow. “Will your High King permit us to return home in peace? Or will he proceed with his plans to invade Mordor?” He asked and Galadriel did not answer because what could she possibly tell? She was known to be an Orc-slayer. “The shadow has not only overcome you, it has overcome all Elvendom. In the end, your drive to prove your virtue will work right into Sauron’s designs.”
“You speak lies,” Galadriel shook her head as she spoke through gritted teeth. “Hoping I will reveal something.”
“You have already revealed everything I hoped you would and more,” Adar answered calmly and walked out of the tent.
He did not even look at you because he was so focused on the battle that was to come – he had his confirmation about Halrand being Sauron. About him being in Eregion. Now he was an unstoppable force.
“Adar…” You called out for him but he was out of the tent already.
You looked at Galadriel with a sigh before gathering your skirts and rushing out after him. So did she.
“It is time!” Your husband announced in Black Speech to his children. You were pretty fluent in this language by now.
“All of Eregion may well be under Sauron’s control by now,” Galadriel was trying to make him realise the truth. “It will take far more than a legion of your children to lay siege to it!”
But Adar was leading her to the edge of the hill from where the real power of your army could be seen. The truth be told – most of the Orcs had left Mordor to march towards Eregion. You had been the one insisting on that back in the day.
“Did you really think I would attempt to challenge the might of Sauron with a single legion?” Adar asked and stopped as he looked down at your soldiers below the hill. You stood behind him and you had to admit – the view was admirable and was filling you with pride. However, you knew very well that those poor and filthy creatures were being led into a trap.
“Now that you have confirmed beyond any doubt who he is and told me who carries your Ring, Eregion will fall,” Adar turned his head around to look at Galadriel with a smirk. “And Sauron with it.”
“No…” Galadriel looked down, visibly overthinking something. “This must be what he wants. Sauron has no army of his own, so he’s lured yours here instead,” she laid her eyes upon Adar as your heart skipped a beat.
She even found your eyes, too, as if she was trying to make you see the truth your husband could not. She was able to see the treachery but she still could not see the deceiver. You suddenly realised Halbrand’s task had not been very difficult.
“He wants you to attack Eregion,” she added but you remained still. It would be suspicious to agree with her words eagerly but you hoped she would make Adar change his mind. After all, he wanted to protect his children the most.
“Bind her. She will be useful later,” he ordered instead and three Orcs hurried to your side to grab Galadriel.
Of course. The love he had for his children would always be overshadowed by his hatred towards Sauron. His personal revenge, his own retribution.
“I beg you…” Galadriel addressed Adar but he ignored her so she laid her eyes upon you. “Do not let your husband be a fool! Do not do this! Do not take his lure!”
Her desperate words and her behaviour as she was being dragged away by the Orcs were sending a shiver down your spine because you could see yourself in her – you could see yourself doing the same to protect him but you could not.
You were terrified of Adar’s reaction after finding out the truth about you. He would never trust you again.
And, after all, Sauron’s grasp around your heart was still tight and painful. Perhaps you were only a tool in his scheme but you still did not wish for his downfall or his death.
“I will make him choke on it,” Adar remarked.
“No!” Galadriel shouted. “You mustn’t. This is all his design! This is what Sauron wants! Whatever forces were encouraging you to come here were his!”
You looked away, nervously.
Thankfully, your husband was too occupied with his thirst for the battle to truly think about Galadriel’s words. She had no idea, of course, that it had been you encouraging Adar to march with his armies towards Eregion. But she had said one sentence too much.
Glûg handed Adar a war horn but he did it hesitantly, causing his Lord Father’s impatience. The Orc was visibly worried and startled by Galadriel’s screams and warnings.
Adar was not, however. He blew the horn and a malicious feeling filled your heart – there was no way back.
Your betrayal was definite as you had just brought Sauron his army.
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