#that didn't rhyme

[sunnywalnut]

I'm going to start kissing women if y'all don't knock it off

[malvoliowithin]

"problem plays" this "romances" that I'm proposing new and exciting Shakespearean Play Groupings for your amusement!

The Bad Dad Triad: King Lear, Henry IV Part 1, Romeo and Juliet

The "My Wife's A Floozy" Trifecta: Othello, Much Ado About Nothing, the Winter's Tale

The "Me And My Shitty Little Minion Are About To Fuck Up Your Shit Hardcore" Trilogy: A Midsummer Night's Dream, Richard III, the Tempest

The Falstaffiad: Henry IV part 1, Henry IV part 2, The Merry Wives of Windsor

The "Holy Fuck There's Two of 'Em" Saga: Twelfth Night, the Comedy of Errors

The "Dear Diary My Homoerotic Bullshit Has A Body Count Now" Series: Richard II, Julius Caesar, Coriolanus

The "Why Are The Fucking Trees Trying To Kill Me. Hate This Shit" Trilogy: Macbeth, the Winter's Tale, As You Like It

[buoy-base]

The Paldean gym leaders really said Fuck Them Kids

[teddybeartoji]

thinking a lot of thoughts about bf!gojo :(

he will be the sweetest bf ever.. it's a bit concerning with how attached he is to you, bordering on codependency but he just cant help it he loves you too much :(( everytime youre both together on something like lunch with friends or hanging out the sight of you two is enough to give anyone who spares a glance cavities.. his eyes are so in love and hes always got that dopey smile on his face, his touch is always gentle and caring despite him being a teasing asshole sometimes 😭

and behind closed doors ... dear god this man is INSATIABLE.. always has to have a hand around you and touching you !!!! and his sex drive.. erm.. yeah.. idk i see him as the type to want to do it everyday because he just loves you too much and he doesnt know what to do with himself and all this love he has !!!! theres something sweet about him just always wanting you and wanting to make you feel good eufnhffhehrjfnf

the stark difference between you two being such a sweet couple in public but also .. having seen each other INSIDE OUT quite literally is so hot and cute.. :( that level of intimacy .. :((( BF!GOJO WE NEED YOU !!!!!! ok this has gotten too long im sorry HAVE A GOOD DAY THANK YOU

HIIII MY SWEETHEART I'M SORRY FOR THE WAIT!!!! BUT I'M HERE I'M HERE I'M HERE!!!!! I'M HERE AND I'M FEELING TERRIBLY SOFT FOR HIM AND I NEED TO HAVE HIM IN MY ARMS RIGHT THIS INSTANT!!!!!!! i agree with everything you've said nonnie!!!! and i am covering you in kisses as thanks!!!! mwah mwah mwah!!!! wait also!!!!!!!!!!!! more exclamation marks!!!!!! please please please don't apologize for rambling!!!!!!!!!! i will always hear you out!!!!! i want more actually!!!!!!!!!!!! please!!!!!!!!!!!!! i love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ok everybody get comfortable bc i have some of bf!gojo headcanons for you!!!!

his pupils are literal hearts whenever he's with and whenever he's Thinking about you!!!! (i'm saying that his pupils are always like that)(he is simply unable to get you off his head)(he's not even trying)(he's so fucking in love with you).

he's constantly resting his head on your head or on your shoulder. this just came to me. he wraps his hands around your middle and he always gives you a squeeze!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and a kiss on your neck. and he probably (read: definitely) smells you. and then hums into your skin. omfg i need to hug him so badly. i am losing my mind here nonnie...

okay and i just talked abt him taking naps with you too, right? and i just can't stop thinking about him always taking pics of you whenever you fall asleep on top of him:(((((((((((((( drooling or not, he's taking the pic!!!!!! AND i truly believe that he has begged (literally begged down on his hands and knees) shoko and suguru, so that they'll take pics of the two of you together aswell!!! satoru has a folder with like a THOUSAND pics of you both just napping together:((( he goes through it whenever he's really missing you:(((((((

ok and he loves taking showers and baths with you. loves, loves, loves. he just wants to sit under or in the water with you, just feeling your skin against him. feeling your heartbeat against him. he likes the intimacy of it all. it's so tender and so soft and so loving and he just wants to do everything with you. he's gonna take a fucking piss with you if you'd only let him.

he loves your smile sm. this is such a basic little concept but he does. nothing else in this sick world brings him as much joy as your smile and laughter. and oh my fucking god his heart feels like it's going to explode whenever he makes you laugh (which is all the time let's be honest he's very fucking funny and he is not afraid of making himself look like a fool just for you<3). he loves it when you laugh at cat videos, he loves it when you laugh at whatever the fuck is playing on the tv and he loves it when you laugh at a joke one of his friends make!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he goes a little insane whenever he sees you having fun with his friends:((((((((((((((((((((( it just means the world to him:(((( and you and the younger ones too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! omfg when he sees you coddling gumi and yuuji and nobara:((((((((((((((((( stop, he literally feels like he's going to cry every time i am also crying i can't do this anymore

btw he always swings your hands whenever his fingers are interwiened with yours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ahhhh!!!!!!! and he has that big dopey smile on his lips again and his dimples are showing and he's laughing so loudly that everybody is turning to look at you both on the street but you couldn't care any less!!!!!!! how could you when your boyfriend is making your heart grow twice the size it was before and you just feel so giddy and so full of love and you want to kiss him stupid!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

he loves spending his morning with you. i actually think of him as more of a morning person actually idk how popular that concept is but yeah. don't get me wrong - he refuses to let you up from the bed for at least an hour after you wake up but he does have a lot of energy. he wants to kiss and he wants to hug and he wants to tickle and he wants you to play with his hair and he wants and he wants and he wants and you will give and give and give!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! he's a little lovesick puppy and he needs your attention like he needs air!!!!!

and then he wants you to brush his teeth for him. yes. you read that right. he sits you down onto the bathroom counter and bares his teeth at you like the puppy that he is and HE'S SO FUCKING CUTEEEEEE FUCKKKK CUTENESS AGGRESSION IS SO REAL I NEED TO JUST SQUEEZE HIM A LITTLE AAAAAAAAAAA I NEED TO PINCH HIS CHEEEKS!!!!!!!!!!!! he still looks sleepy and his smile is so fucking big and his hands are resting on your hips, his thumbs are drawing hearts into your skin. and he most definitely kisses you before he actually rinses his mouth.............. and then laughs when the toothpaste gets all over you. it's a mess and he's laughing and you're in love.

he loves it when you baby him. he does ask for it as a joke but when you genuinely do it he gets a little flustered. the tips of his ears always turn into a shade of dark pink and he's looking at you like puss in boots. you know what i'm talking abt. big eyes, fluttering eyelashes - he loves you so fucking much. he loves it when you tuck him in bed, he loves it when you kiss his nose, he loves it when you pinch his cheeks i am biased i just said i want to do that don't look at me, he loves it when you tickle him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WAIT STOP HE LOVES IT WHEN YOU TICKLE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!! HE WANTS YOU TO STRADDLE HIM AND TICKLE THE LIVING FUCK OUT OF HIM HE WANTS TO LAUGH WITH YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i died

he also loves it when you cling to him. in any way. hands around his neck, around his body, around his arms - it does not matter. he wants you to quite literally climb him like a tree. he loves it when you snuggle into him and when you refuse to let him go. and when you hold his hand and try to stop him from leaving. he's not going to go. it doesn't take a lot for him to give into you. he's folding immediately. he doesn't want to go either. he loves it when you're needy. he loves it when you whine. he loves it when you tease him. he might pop a boner. at everything you do. he just loves you sooooooooooo muchh!!

18+ HE IS INSATIABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!! HE IS THEE LOVERBOY!!!!!! i think he does like to get a taste of you every single day, no matter whether it's actually having sex or it's eating you out or it's just making out or it's entertaining you with his beautiful slender fingers or it's dry humping etcetcetc. he wants to touch you, he wants to feel you - it's a must!!

i already said it but he loves intimacy!!!! like yeah ofc he likes his freaky sex as much as the next guy (he most definitely likes it more than the next guy) but he loooooves when he can just be in the moment with you!! he's always savouring you - holding your hand when his burying his dick deep inside you, he's snaking his arm around your body as he grinds into you from behind. he's licking and nipping at your skin because he just can't get enough of you. he's sucking on your tongue, he's pressing your hips down against his, he's kissing every fucking inch of your body. i truly think he wants to eat you and he wants to devour you and he wants to merge the two of you together forever<33

okay i have officially melted away... i am a puddle of love Goo... ily nonnie

[gatoburr0]

slay

[pinazee]

Heres a poll cause why not

*edit* ignore the title, im clearly not well versed on fandom words lol i simply meant —>

Favorite hatchetfield not canon ship

I didnt include ted/ tinky or paul/pokey just cause it seems one sided?? Idk whats going on there tbh

Nor did i include pete/richie because i already included michie and flipschitz and of the three it looked like that was the least popular

Also i think wilbur/mcnamara are technically sort of implied canon? So thats why its not listed either

Gary/linda wasn’t included because ive only ever seen ppl talk about it as a “gary is the father of one of her kids” theory and not really as a romance (though the speed with which he was ready to worship her should not be overlooked 😏)

Theres a lot of random pairing ya’ll i tried.

[bellamysgriffin]

I break down, and he's pulling me in In a world of boys, he's a gentleman

request for @emmafallsinlove

[pine-rhyme]

Sucker punched idiot baby experiencing the consequences of an expired sneakers.

[eqt-95]

I'm here to bring fluff and happiness back with this ♥️

ok so get this: my phone showed your ask as a red heart. so here I was, typing away about deep-throating popsicles and fingering milkshakes when I opened your ask on my laptop and saw a... white heart?! absolute witchcraft!

and since now i don't know what's right-side up from upside down, i offer a mash up: ❤️+🤍 or 'first kiss / realization' + 'kiss at the wedding / milestone'

p.s. thanks for the fluff and happiness injection. i needed it

- - - - - -

Kara loved going to weddings. What wasn’t there to love? There were flowers, delicious foods, endless dancing, and, best of all, that excuse to confess your deepest feelings in front of friends and family to the love of your life. 

She’d watched her sister and Kelly share their vows, commit to each other, and look darn good while doing it. She danced with Nia and Brainy to Bye-Bye-Bye which was technically of Alex’s no-play list, but Nia bribed the DJ. She stuffed her face with cake alongside Esme who was stubbornly fighting off the sleepies. She even had the most amazing pep-talk slash hug slash reveal with Lena.

The very best kind.

The kind that left her warm and seen and cherished.

The kind that left her wanting that same feeling for forever. 

The kind that felt like a Red Sun: held and understood and home. 

So why did she feel so… heavy and twisted inside?

Stumped. She was stumped. She was also in a slump. Her lower lip was quite close to a grump. But how to overcome this hump?

She shook her head. Now was definitely not the time for Dr. Seuss rhymes. Though silently she argued there was always time for Dr. Seuss rhymes.

Serious Kara won out. So instead of rhymes she stewed. She stewed and brewed and searched for a clue(d) -

“What’s up homie?” Nia asked, sliding across the bench and tipsily colliding into Kara’s side. “You missed REO Speedwagon. Even J’onn gave it his all; might’ve thrown out his back though. Poor guy. I am parched.”

Kara bit her lip and scowled and really really wanted a rhyme scheme to get her through this. “You love Brainy, right?”

“Woa, left field there swinger,” Nia smirked. Her attention was on the array of glasses with colorful drinks littering the table behind them. “Sure do.”

Kara slouched and let her chin find the palm of her hand. “So how did-”

“You think this is sour raspberry?” Nia interrupted, a cup of bright blue liquid appearing under Kara’s nose. “Or tropical punch,” she said.

Kara sniffed the cup. “Tropical punch.”

“Bonus,” Nia exclaimed and took a long drag. “You were saying?”

“Um,” Kara began without an ounce of heroic chutzpah. “How did you know?”

The question made the ‘heavy’ feeling morph into butterflies. It did nothing for the twisting. In fact, it exacerbated the twisting. It wrangled around her heart and made her breaths shallow with nerves. Definitely no chutzpah.

“Easy: He’s my person. My ride or die. To infinity and beyond. The Clyde to my Bonnie.”

“Are you sure that’s who you want to compare-”

“Look, it doesn’t matter. They went out with a bang,” Nia scoffed. “But fine, point taken,” Nia conceded then pulled another deep swig. “He’s the Orpheus to my Persephone.”

“I think you mean Eurydice.”

“Sure.” Her lips were now a faint shade of blue.

“But also, didn’t Orpheus fail-?”

“He did no such thing!” Nia proclaimed with rather unfounded enthusiasm. Juice sloshed onto the grass. “He went to the depths of hell for the woman he loved. He descended through souls and ghouls and fools-”

Kara wondered if this was the rhyme she needed. Maybe it was, because it propelled her up and across the lawn and so focused was she that Nia’s parting words of ‘Go get her, champ!’ fell of deaf ears.

She stumbled over lawn darts and accidentally destroyed a life-size jenga game. She nearly walked straight through the barn wall and into a decorative trough. She walked straight past the cake without grabbing a slice. 

Kara Zor El was on a mission.

And that mission was less than ten feet away, laughing and radiating like the sun rose and shone only for her. Her nose scrunched as the smile spread wider when Kara approached. It faded only slightly when the palpable look of fear on Kara’s face was noticed.

“Kara? Is everything ok?” she asked, stepping away from the group and brushing a reassuring thumb over Kara’s arm.

They stepped more steps until the steps led them to crickets and tree frogs and only the white noise of people. And ever the Pulitzer winning wordsmith, these were the words that managed to trip out of her mouth:

“I want to be your Orpheus.”

Lena’s mouth parted and eyes narrowed. “You… what?”

“I want to… shoot, no I mean…”

“You want to trap me in hell?” Lena asked. And bless the straight face she was trying to keep, but between Kara’s fish mouthing and absolutely butchering of whatever heartfelt words she had hoped would appear out of thin air, Lena’s face was doing some serious gymnastics to keep from smirking.

“He didn’t fail! He… he…”

Straws. Those were the things Kara was grasping for. Humiliatingly limp, paper straws.

“I want to fight off souls and ghouls and fools for you. I want the chance. I want you and the world to know that you are the person I’d move heaven and hell for you, because you make me feel whole. You make me feel seen and wanted and loved and I just… I just want you. And I don’t know why it’s taken me so long to realize it but I-”

Lips.

Soft lips.

Soft lips and deep sighs and the flutter of long dark hair tickling her cheeks.

And then a sigh.

And then a ‘wowzers’.

And then a laugh.

And then again.

- - - - -

ask game

[lyssartandstars]

very long time no see, the gay pilots have gotten to me

[dragonpyre]

Love being proven right about someone with rancid vibes. Feels like winning the karma lottery

[margridarnauds]

I'll take "Raphael is bad in bed because he's a pillow princess" and raise you: "Raphael is bad in bed because Haarlep is doing his best to set the mood, maybe try some roleplay, and Raphael is too busy reciting nursery rhymes in the middle of things and looking at portraits of himself over Haarlep's shoulder"

[bora-in-tamriel]

Apples; sweet and sour, red and green; cut to pieces or eaten whole; savor the taste, chew with care, or choke on your own greed.

[fictionadventurer]

Beauty and the Beast for the WIP game?

My only real attempt at writing poetry before this year happened during a stretch when I tried to write a Beauty and the Beast retelling in verse. I got about two-thirds of the way through before it fizzled out and languished forever unfinished.

When it comes to my recent novel-in-verse obsession, the simplest option would be to take another look at this work and try to finish it. There's a lot of terrible poetry in there, but there are some that are somewhat better than I remember. I can't claim to be a judge of what's good poetry, but some of these are readable, so I'll share some of them here.

The first set of semi-readable poems covers the first meetings between Beauty and the Beast. (These are all numbered, and I'm leaving the numbers in place to better differentiate between separate poems. I think the speaker in most of these is fairly clear from context, but just in case, I'll put the speaker's name in the title, too.)

VI. beauty and beast

he is every nightmare i’ve ever forgotten he is thunder and darkness and death he is fear with fangs he is beastly

she is every dream i’ve never dared for she is roses and sunlight and life she is hope with jewels she is beauty

*

VIII. beauty

the chair creaks when he sits

my knees quake when he speaks

the master laughs when i ask

when i will die

my ears doubt when i hear

my mind reels when i realize

the master wonders when i began

to think he’d kill me

IX. beast

the rules are these you are mistress of this castle the servants will obey your every whim the rooms and all within are yours including me

you will dine with me at dusk we will not speak if you want silence you will look at me and try not to scream

i will not harm a hair of your head i will not cause a moment’s worry you will do whatever you wish except leave

X. beauty

his mercy shatters my world makes it bigger and at the same time smaller

how can i live in a monster’s cage

my life will be long and lonely with him my friend and at the same time jailer

how can i look at a monster’s face

the castle teems with wonders that all belong to him and at the same time me

what do i do with a monster’s love

*

The next set of poems I feel like sharing starts with Beauty finding a portrait in the castle, and then leads into her sharing a dance with Beast that makes her kind of freak out over the fact that she might be falling in love.

XXII. beast

today you found a painting in a long-forgotten room covered in cobwebs and shrouded in dust

there was a reason it was lost

the portrait showed a man with a face like the dawn and eyes like the sea you thought he looked kind

he was young and a fool

you may keep it if you wish or lock it back in darkness it matters not to me i used to see him daily

i doubt i’ll see his face again

*

XXIV. beauty (and beast)

if rooms have souls the ballroom is wise a radiant beauty long past her prime

she treasures the days when she lived and was loved she keeps them and counts them like pearls on a string

(she is not the only one, my dear)

long past midnight in moonlight and hush this sleepwalking girl can glimpse former days

a flash of a gown and a whisper of waltz what glorious balls must this room have beheld

(they were marvelous indeed, my friend)

it seems a shame she grows old alone with nothing but darkness and dust held within

i would dance for her return the spark of life if only we had music and i had a partner

(i will gladly dance with you, my love)

XXV. beast

my dear beauty don’t you know i learned dancing long ago

one step closer take my hand with a waltz you’ll understand

let the music guide your feet in a dance that’s slow and sweet

hand in hand and heart to heart it’s not love but it’s a start

XXVI. beauty

he is hulking beastly

i am small delicate

i should be stumbling crushed

but

we marvelously miraculously dance

and it feels like flying

XXVII. beauty (to the portrait)

man on the wall i may be mad but i must give voice to the storm in my heart and you are the only one near

the master puzzles me i know his home as well as my own but i know so little about him

(is he beast or man or nightmare or dream or captor or friend)

i saw his face and thought him a beast

(but he grows roses and reads poems and has never killed or even raised his voice)

i heard his voice and thought him a monster

(but he spared my life gave me his home and all he owned offered his heart and never once has been anything but gentle)

i watched him dance and thought him a man

(with grace like an angel or a prince and i think that maybe he was not always so lonely and that his heart aches for things lost)

what am i to think do say be feel about him now

and why do these questions always come at midnight

*

The final poem is one that I had completely forgotten about, so I was shocked to find it lurking in the latter sections of the document and showing signs of using some decent imagery. By polishing up the last couple of lines, I've got something that's not half bad as a standalone poem.

This one occurs during an extended period when Beauty is still trying to process her feelings toward Beast and figure out if this is really love or if her feelings are being warped by isolation and close proximity.

XXX. beauty

if this is love it is a dark and grasping love a child stumbling in the night crying for a candle flame and cherishing the smallest spark of light

if this is love it is a bleak and desolate love a skeleton tree in a barren desert windbeaten and scrubbed to bone and bursting into bloom at the first drop of rain

if this is love it is a smoke and mirrors love a sleight of hand or trick of light that takes my broken heart and fools me into thinking he can make it whole

[episims]

Blair "-a few drinks later I found myself fiddling with the guitar and the club's owner came up with the idea that I could be their opening act. Took him one phone call to find me a bassist and a drummer."

Daphne "That's, um... nice?"

Blair "So just saying, you didn't miss a thing. The band was shit and it was otherwise an uneventful evening, too."

Daphne "That, uh, doesn't sound very uneventful to me? But I've never been to a concert, so... I don't know what it's like."

Blair "What, never? How's that even possible?"

Daphne "I haven't had a reason to go, I guess."

Blair "Babe, we gotta fix that. Gigs are like... the energy of the audience making love with the music. It's noisy and messy and you never know if it ends up being a flop, but when it hits the sweet spot you'll be all sweaty and moaning for more."

Daphne "That, um..."

Blair "Let me be your guide. I'll make sure you won't get overwhelmed."

Daphne "—I-I guess we could do that, sometime."

[anneapocalypse]

"Why didn't the Orlesian Wardens try harder to get into Ferelden?" Senior Warden Riordan did not sneak across the border alone, try to negotiate opening the border at what he thought was a good-faith parley only to be imprisoned and tortured, still manage to bust himself out as soon as he saw an opportunity, make contact with the remaining Fereldan Wardens, fight with them in the final battle despite being unable to get the rest of the Wardens in, and die giving them a fighting chance to kill the Archdemon for us to say that the Wardens all gave up on Ferelden.