#that Penelope finally finally was getting to have

[reidsrambles]

Part 2: New Year's Day

This is part 2 of a duo, so please go read part 1, New Year's Eve, if you haven't yet!

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Description: My only New Year's Eve plan is to help my best friend Penelope entertain her many party guests. When I find myself alone with her coworker, Spencer (who I've had a crush on for ages), it seems that my New Year's might turn out different than I had planned.

(Content/Warnings below the cut)

Content/Warnings: [18+ MDNI] smut, protected (condom) PiV sex, oral sex (F receiving), brief mention of being drunk or high in the past

A/N: Again, down the wire! I've been writing literally all day. It's 10 PM and I haven't yet made dinner... I wrote and edited this one basically just today?? So if there are any mistakes or I missed any warnings, pls lmk tysm. Again, credit to @saradika-graphics for the divider graphics, including the one I cropped below.

Names used: Baby

Words (this chapter): 3,734

Words (total): 5,759

The kiss is desperate, but not rough. He’s kissing me back, right? I pull my face away. He leans his forehead against mine, both of us panting into the mere inches between our lips. 

He doesn’t loosen his hold on my body. “Is everything okay? We can stop if you want.” 

“I don’t want to stop.” I grip the fabric of his shirt where my hands lie on his back. “Do you want to stop?”

His hand snakes down to my ass, splaying wide across it. He pulls my body into his, letting me feel his hardening cock.

“I really don’t want to stop,” he breathes into my neck, just below my ear, ���but I have to confess something before we go any further.”

What the hell? Does he have an STI that I need to know about? Trouble keeping it up? I mean, that doesn’t seem to be a problem, but you never know. Is he already with someone? Penelope didn’t say he had a partner, but maybe he’s kept them a secret?

We both still, Spencer breathing against my neck. I’d consider it ticklish if not for the jolt it sends straight to my core.

“I’ve been attracted to you for a long time, but I was too scared to say anything.” The words come out of Spencer’s mouth. Not mine. Holy shit.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I laugh, dropping my head to Spencer’s chest in utter bewilderment. “I’ve had a crush on you since the first time we met. Penelope hasn’t stopped teasing me about it since.”

“Glad I’m not alone in that,” he laughs.

“Happy New Year, by the way,” I say, lifting my head to look at him again. Eyes, lips. Eyes, lips. 

“Happy New Year,” he breathes, hovering against my lips. Oppositely charged magnets falling in order with the laws of physics. Complying with the will of the universe.

I’ve never been kissed like this. Maybe it’s the thrill of unrequited lust finally requited, or maybe Spencer is just a really good kisser. His hands cradle my head on both sides. It’s like he could kiss you for hours and never be sick of it. Every soft, lush kiss plays against the intermittent roughness. The desperate ones, where lips are bit and tongues are engaged in the fervor. It feels wholly consuming and incomplete at the same time. 

“We don’t have to do anything else,” I say, “but to be clear, I’m definitely down if you want to.”

He shakes his head and steps back, putting distance between us. He clenches and unclenches his hands and then rubs his palms against his dress pants. 

My eyes catch on the bulge in his pants, and shamelessly, I can’t stop staring at it. I’ve imagined it before, in my most desperate, lonely moments. Right after breakups, when I’d rather escape into my imagination to soothe me. After running into him at one of Penelope’s get-togethers. I’d steal every shy glance at him, trying to memorize his features. Then I’d go home and imagine myself kissing every inch of him.

I know I probably just need a good eight to…twelve hours of sleep to clear the fog in my brain that’s making this feel like another one of my erotic daydreams. But maybe being a bit out of it is what led me to kiss him like that. If I had been at my most rational, I probably wouldn’t have.

Spencer wipes at his face. He can’t stop moving his hands. Biting a nail between his teeth. Gripping the material of his pants. Crossing and uncrossing his arms. 

“[Y/N], you have no idea how badly I want to.” My heart sinks into my stomach. There’s always a but. “But I don’t want it to happen like this.”

I nod slowly, genuinely trying to avoid letting my disappointment come across as pouting. “Okay. That’s fair.”

He looks utterly exasperated, trying to keep his hands off me, and I’ve never felt so horny and so dejected at the same time. If he didn’t clearly state that he’s into me, I can’t lie and say that I wouldn’t feel extremely rejected right now.

“I’ve thought about it before,” he says. “What it would be like… to be with you. I just don’t want the first time to be at a party, in Penelope’s guest room”

I sit back down on the bed, willing my body to cool down, but it’s a non-starter. “I’ve thought about it before. What it would be like… to be with you,” playing back in my head on an unending loop. Clenched thighs give my clit the slightest bit of attention and ease the ache every so slightly.

“I’ve thought about it too,” I say, reminiscing about the numerous dirty fantasies I’ve crafted in my head over the years. I owe far too many orgasms to my vibrator, and to imaginary Spencer praising me, begging me to cum.

He rakes his fingers through his hair. “God, this is so hard.” 

Hard, indeed. I selfishly ogle the tent in his pants again, taking advantage of the fact that he’s struggling to look in my direction. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” I ask. “Do you want to leave?”

He joins me on the edge of the mattress. Again, a respectable distance between us. 

He sighs. “If I don’t leave now, I don’t think I’ll have enough self-control to stop myself.”

Yet, he’s sitting beside me, wringing his hands in his lap. 

Before I can formulate any response, he starts. “What about when the party ends?”

“I locked the door on the way in. I didn’t want anyone barging in here trying to find the bathroom. And,” I gesture to the door, the party even louder now that the champagne is flowing, “this party doesn’t die down until three, maybe four.”

“I don’t have a condom, either,” he says quietly.

I push myself up off the bed and walk over to the bedside table. I’ve stayed in this room many times. Usually, when I get drunk or high and can’t drive home. Penelope snores. As much as I love her to bits, if she didn’t have a guest bedroom, I’d be sleeping on the couch. 

I rifle through the top drawer. A couple of individually packaged toothbrushes. A couple of mini bottles of mouthwash. Charging cables. Nope, nope, nope. 

I squat down to look through the bottom drawer, consciously arching my back and popping my ass out a bit. I know they’re in here somewhere. In the back of the drawer, tucked away, is a small, colorful zipper pouch. I’ve stumbled across this pouch before, but I can safely say that I’ve never used it. I hope nobody else has, either, honestly. Tucked inside is a roll of male condoms and a few individually packaged female condoms. 

I (mentally, emotionally, spiritually) cross my fingers as I check the date printed across the wrapper. They aren’t expired. Thank fucking god. 

I rip one off at the perforated line and place it in Spencer’s hand. 

He fiddles with the foil wrapper in his fingers. Not opening it. Just turning it in his hands.

“Are you sure you want this?” he asks. “Here? Like this?”

“Before tonight, I honestly thought there was zero chance you liked me. I’ve wanted this for so long, and I’m so incredibly horny right now that it’s actually hard to think straight.” I wrap my hand around his, and he stops fidgeting. “Is there anything else?”

My question is sincere and gentle. Is there anything else that you need to reassure you that I want this? Is there anything else you need?

“I haven’t been with anyone in a long time, but I was tested after,” he says.

“I was tested after my last partner.”

I start undoing my blouse. Button by button. Lower and lower. Spencer mirrors me, undoing his crisp, blue dress shirt. Button by button. Lower and lower.

“And we can stop at any point, so please let me know if there’s anything you want or don’t want,” he says.

“Same goes for you.”

I slide my blouse off and unzip my skirt at the side. With my tights already off, I’m left in just my bra and underwear, my clothes in a pile beside the bed. Spencer takes his shirt off and his pants follow. He tries his best to quickly fold them, and in two large strides, he places them on top of the dresser. 

He turns to face me. In just his underwear, I have quite the view. I don’t even think he’s fully hard, but my mouth is watering at the outline of him. The butterflies are gone, replaced by a pang of hunger. I want to lick and taste every inch of him. The mental renderings I’ve crafted of Spencer in the past are all wiped from my memory. I have no use for them anymore. I have the real thing, actively being encoded into memory. 

He comes to stand between my legs. Still seated, his veiled cock is right in front of my face. 

“[Y/N], there’s just one more question that I have to ask first.”

I can only imagine what he sees looking down at me. As I look up at him through my lashes, my wet lips and flushed, glowing cheeks sit right next to his hard cock.

Does he know that I’ve been rocking my hips and squeezing my thighs together just to pacify my throbbing clit? 

“Can we go on a real date too sometime?” he says. “I don’t want this to be a one-time thing, and I also don’t want this to ruin my chances with you.” 

I feel stupid for not thinking that far ahead. If he had just wanted this to be a one-night stand, I would have accepted that, even though I know I want more with him. 

I nod and kiss the front of his hip, earning a stuttered breath from him when my cheek grazes his bulge. 

“I’d love that, Spencer.” 

I drag my face across his covered cock. Everything about this—about him—is intoxicating. I breathe him in, my hands on his hips, and the scent feels like a drug I could get high off of. 

“Can you lie down?” he says. 

I have no objections. 

I rip my bra and underwear off as fast as I can manage, pulling my bra over my head instead of undoing the clasps. I toss them to the floor to join the rest of my clothes. I’m, maybe a bit shamelessly, too eager to waste any time. 

Spencer is standing next to the bed, naked, jaw slack, just stroking himself to nothing but my naked body. That’ll do great things for the ego. 

“You are…” he breathes, shaking his head. The words he’s missing hang somewhere in the air, but he doesn’t look away from me long enough to search for them.

He opens the foil wrapper, rolls the condom on, and crawls onto the bed between my legs. I expect him to just shove it in there, but instead, he drags two long fingers through my wetness, absolutely mesmerized.

“Perfect,” he says, staring at my pussy. “So perfect.” 

He slides one finger inside me and I gasp. It doesn’t fill me, but when he takes it out a moment later, I still mourn the emptiness. He takes the same finger into his mouth, eyes closed as he admires the taste of me. 

I’m pretty sure that I can’t get any hornier than I am at this moment. It’s physiologically impossible. 

“Please, Spencer. Fuck,” I whine. “I need you inside me.”

Quick pecks trace a line up my body, and Spencer kisses me, bodies pressed together like he’s never going to kiss me again. It’s deep, sloppy, and passionate. Moaning into each other’s mouths as I grip his hips. His cock is nestled in my center. I grind against it.

Breathless, Spencer lifts his body just enough to reach between us, guiding his cock to where we need it. 

I close my eyes as he enters me; I have to turn off one of my senses to process it. In the black void behind my eyelids, I can feel everything. I can hear everything. A choked moan at the back of my throat breaks free. He pushes in further. Spencer shifts from his hands to his elbows, using the leverage to slide in even more. 

“Oh, god. This is so much better than I imagined,” he says, his voice strained from pleasure.

Was Spencer thinking about me at the same time I was thinking about him? Like two lovers wondering if the other is gazing up at the moon at the same time. I open my eyes. The tufts of hair framing his face flop down, a few stray strands sticking to his face. The room is already warming and his skin glistens in it. 

“What did you think about? What did you imagine?” I ask.

He fills me to the hilt, and his lips find mine; the kiss a fierce declaration that this shared sensation in our bodies is indeed shared. Spencer is feeling the same utter bliss that I am, and the thought of that alone sends a spark to my core. I’m making him feel this good. 

Spencer remains unmoving, huffing breaths intermixed with muttered curses as he adjusts. The part where we’re united throbs like a beating heart, both of our bodies diverting blood from our brains to fuel this tryst. 

“I felt so ashamed thinking about you like that,” he whispers against my cheek, “not knowing if you wanted me, too.”

Pinned beneath him, I push my hips up against him as much as I can manage, desperate for more. Spencer’s eyes flutter closed as he matches my movements, his cock sliding in and out as we grind into each other.

“Did you think about what I’d feel like the first time? Because I thought about what you’d feel like inside me.”

Earning moans from Spencer feels like a gift. A secret that has been bestowed upon me. For my ears only. I want to wrap this secret up and hide it under my bed. To throw it in a box and padlock it shut. I want to place it in a fancy locket, one I hide under my shirt, tucked up safe against my skin where nobody else can reach it.

“I thought about that far too much.” He shakes his head. “But you’re even better than I could’ve imagined.”

He pumps into me a few more times, hard and fast, as our bodies take the wheel, chasing the zenith of pleasure. We move together as a duet. The song? A lullaby of moans, whimpers, and whispered praises.

With each thrust, his body presses against my clit.

“Oh my god. You feel so fucking good, Spencer.”

He reaches a hand up to the side of my face, cradling my head and stroking my cheek with his thumb. I can feel the heat radiating from my cheeks. His thumb is icy in comparison. 

“You are so fucking beautiful.” He glances at my chest, and then his eyes dart as he takes in the rest of my body. “Your body is perfect.” He peppers kisses across my lips, my shoulder, my neck. Every place his lips touch stings like I’ve been branded. “Perfect,” he breathes against my neck. 

“How did I taste?” I ask, remembering Spencer licking his finger clean.

“Addictive” is the word he chooses, and thoughts of Spencer’s head between my legs—in my own bed—consume me.

He slows, almost to a stop. “Would you mind if I…?”

I finish his trailed-off sentence, not entirely sure if I’m right on the money or not. “Go down on me?” 

He nods, and a breathy, “please,” is all I can manage to squeak out. It would be damn near impossible to think of a single reason to deny this man in his request.

Between my legs—framed like a work of art—Spencer keeps his eyes locked on my face as he trails his tongue up between my lips. 

“Oh, fuck. Oh my god. Please. Please keep going.”

He moans into my pussy, wasting no time in getting into it. 

“Can I grab your head as I get close?”

He whines, “please,” against my skin, and I tell him to pinch me if he needs me to loosen my grip. 

Spencer’s long arms wrap around my thighs, keeping me from squirming away. I’ve never had anyone go down on me like this. He is feral, barely coming up for air. I reach down to slide my fingers into his hair, feeling myself inch closer and closer by the second. He’s humping the bed, large dimples forming in his plush ass. I just want to dig my nails into it.

One arm lifts from its spot around my leg. Spencer is a man on a mission. He needs that arm, that hand, those fingers. Two fingers slide inside me, and I know I’m not going to last. I squirm against him and he lets me control the penetration, keeping his hand still. His mouth, however, continues in its relentless pursuit. 

I feel like I’ve unlocked something here. This version of Spencer is unleashed. He’s had his taste of the forbidden fruit, and he’s fully invested. 

I grip his head, needing to pull him into me. Needing to control the pressure.

“Spencer, fuck.”

“Yes, baby. Please cum in my mouth.”

“I—” is all I spit out before it hits me. A tidal wave of heat and pressure that radiates from my core. I grip Spencer’s hair between my fingers and he moans even harder. I squeeze my eyes shut so hard that, when I open them, my vision is a pinhole vignetted by fuzzy white light. His tongue continues lapping at my center until my thighs trap his head, my clit unable to take anymore. 

My whole body is tingling. Every nerve in my body is on high alert. My ab muscles twitch with each jerky breath as the lingering shockwaves work through me. 

Spencer is kissing my thighs as if each space his lips touch is better than the last. He is relishing in my body. Worshipping it. 

In this state, having cum so hard that my ears are ringing, I probably wouldn’t hesitate to declare my ardent love for him. Thankfully, I have some logic system deep in my brain that remains online and protects me from stupid mistakes like that. 

“Spencer, please. Get back inside me.”

The moan that spills from us both as he slides back inside me, my pussy still throbbing with aftershocks, should be tattooed somewhere on my body. The waveform of it or whatever. My new New Year’s resolution: get a tattoo. Add that to my other New Year’s resolution: let Spencer Reid fucking rail me in every way possible.

His thrusts are already sloppier than before. “Yes, fuck. Yes. Do you know how fucking good you taste, baby? I could eat you out for hours. So perfect.” 

I grab his jaw and kiss him, tasting myself. Tasting me and him mixed together. 

“Spencer, I’ve wanted this for so long. I’ve wanted you for so long.”

I feel tears brimming in my eyes. Exhaustion, overwhelm, pleasure, and lust well up right at the finish line. Every sporadic back-arching thrust flutters my eyelids, pushing a small tear down both sides of my face.

“The first day I met you,” he says, struggling to get the words out fluidly, “you were the most beautiful thing. The most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.”

My hands slide to his ass, and I grip the flesh. I want my nails to leave a mark. I want to claim him as my own. 

“Cum inside me, Spencer.” 

He pounds into me, hard. The passion he showed while giving me oral is back in full force. 

His head falls into the crook of my neck as he works himself to the edge, muffling the dirty string of words that escape as he falls apart. His cock twitches hard inside me as he spills into the condom. I wish he was condomless, shooting his ropes of cum deep within me. But maybe that’s just a dirty fantasy that will never come to fruition. 

Spencer peppers me with some more kisses before getting up to discard the condom in the small trash can beside the door.

“I’ll change that garbage bag before I leave,” he says.

“I’m going to have to tell her,” I say, pulling my underwear up. “I’ll have to do some laundry for sure.” I gesture to the disheveled, dirty sheets. 

“Yeah, I know. She’s nosy, so I bet she’d figure it out regardless,” he laughs. “Let me know if there’s anything else you need. With the cleanup.”

The party noise is more subdued, but it sounds like the majority of guests are still here. The small digital alarm clock beside the bed reads 1:15 AM. 

“Wanna just wait it out?” I ask, straightening out the sheets just enough to crawl under them. “I promised Penelope I’d help her clean up, anyway.”

Spencer slips in beside me and I snuggle into his side, draping my leg over his and wrapping an arm across his chest. 

“I much prefer it in here,” he says, pressing his lips to my temple. 

I kiss him one last time, long and tender, before resting my head on his shoulder. I don’t even get a word out of my mouth before I crash once more.

A sharp knock on the door jolts me and Spencer from our very deep slumber. Morning light filters through the window, casting a warm glow across the room. I rub my eyes, swiping away the remnants of such a sleep. On the plus side, I feel fucking fantastic. Spencer sits up and stretches his arms above his head.

Another knock. Much harder.

“[Y/N]?” Penelope asks through the door.

We hop out of bed to hurriedly finish redressing ourselves.

“Shit, I fell asleep last night! I’m sorry, Pen!” I yell to her.

“Is…Spencer still in there with you?”

“Yes,” I say, annoyed. “Happy now?”

“I cleared off some space on the counter and started making breakfast whenever you two are dressed!”

Previous Chapter: New Year's Eve

AO3 | Tumblr | Masterlist

[newlyfoundwren]

So in the Riordanverse, demigods get weird prophecy dreams. This can either range from weird images, to evil gods telling of impending doom, to straight up seeing something thousands of miles away that the dreaming demigod in question is not physically present to witness.

If we’re applying Riordanverse rules to Epic the musical, this makes the final song infinitely funnier, because Penelope is a demigod and would have had some (not all) but some knowledge of what happened while Odysseus was away at sea.

Odysseus:I’ve done terrible things. I cannot see how you can still love me

Penelope:

[gale-gentlepenguin]

Epic What if

(What if Odysseus did kill Poseidon?)

Now in Greek mythology none of the gods could be killed the traditional way. But in other fictional mediums involving the Greek gods. There have been times when they died. Usually with a weapon that can harm them, usually imbued with god power, OR someone with god power.

And conveniently, Odysseus is the grandson of Hermes, consumed Molly. Had exposure to several deities, and including being trapped on an island by one for 8 years And at the point when he fought Poseidon… was holding his godly weapon.

So what if… that made Odysseus godly enough.

The Red eyes were not just a change in the mentality. But an awakening of his power.

-Everything up to Six Hundred Strike happened. Including Odysseus’ finishing move.

-Now Poseidon admitted defeat, but pointed out that the storm was released. He will never get back.

-Odysseus picks up the trident. And proceeds to stab him. Testing his immortality.

-And just like in canon of Epic, he stabs him until he concedes.

-Right when Odysseus is about to leave with the storm called off… a thought occurs. What is stopping Poseidon from being a sore loser and drowning Ithaca when he gets home? The gods are vengeful and ruthless. Leaving Poseidon alive would only risk him attack him again. During a time he wasn’t prepared.

-He turns back, picking up the trident. Poseidon pleads.

-“I called off the storm! We had a deal!”

-“What’s stopping you from just making a new storm once I leave? You said it yourself, Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves.”

-He stabs him with the trident through his head. And with such force, he yanks the sea god’s head off!

-Poseidon was dead. He had stopped completely.

-Odysseus watched as the seas went still.

-He had killed the god of the sea. Odysseus noticed the trident Glowing in his hand. The power of the seas… it was His to control now!

-Odysseus pulled Poseidon’s head off the trident. He used the waves to turn into a hand, chucking the headless body of Poseidon towards Charybdis. He took Poseidon’s head with him as he headed home.

-Odysseus was now the god of the seas. But he didn’t care, he had to get home.

-The Ithaca saga didn’t change that much for the first two songs.

-The Song “Hold them down” did. With the sound of a storm approaching. But instead of an arrow piercing Antinous throat. It was a trident!

-“Odysseus” was different. Called “Sea of Blood” Odysseus wasn’t using his tricks of deception and stealth. He used his new god like power to rip them apart! Water constructs tracked down each suitor! Representing monsters Odysseus faced. Polyphemus, Scylla, Circe, etc.

-Some suitors managed to get to their weapons, where Telemachus was waiting. They tried to use him as a bargaining chip… but failed.

-the suitors were slaughtered. And Telemachus saw his dad… who now had powers of the sea.

- “I can’t help but wonder.” Replaced with the song “Descent into godhood.” Where after Odysseus reunited with his son. Athena points out how he changed things. How now he was a god of the sea now. He had a role. He would need to leave them behind.

-Odysseus looks at Athena, he hands the trident to her. “I don’t want to descend to godhood, that’s not a path I want to be. There is only one thing that I want, and it’s a girl I have to see.”

-Athena told him that’s not how it works. He has done something unprecedented. He would need to go to Olympus. He would need to face the gods.

-“Or they will kill them.”

-Odysseus realizes all he’s done, all he wants to do… and he has to deal with the gods.

-So “Would you fall in love with me again.” Is changed to “Would you wait a little longer?” And it’s Odysseus apologizing. Begging his wife to wait. As he has to deal with the gods. After what he did.

-Penelope being the loyal girl she is. Said she isn’t leaving his side. She will be with him. To which he agrees. And there is some vigorous lovemaking.

-thus began the TRUE final saga. The Olympus Saga!

-and these are the songs

-“ One last trip.” A song about Odysseus and Penelope heading to Olympus. Odysseus entrusting his son with the kingdom. Athena stays with Telemachus as Hermes brings them.

-“The Pantheon.” Basically the gods of Olympus are introduced. Zeus talking about the crime Odysseus did, killing a god. To which Odysseus claims it was necessary . And before Zeus judges… Hades appears

-“king of the dead” Hades appears and defends Odysseus to the shock of everyone. Saying he knows the true culprit of the death of Poseidon. Which is a shock, and in his song he lists each thing that results in death, and blames each god on the Pantheon! Pointing out how guilty each of them are for death. And that he deems them Not Guilty when Zeus argues that Hades isn’t the judge. Hades responds “it’s You who has no power, all of you are now in deaths domain and I am now your king!”

-“Defiance for love.” A duet sung by Hades and Odysseus about loving their wives. And the lengths they went. Including a retelling of the hades and Persephone myth. And ending the trial.

-The final song is about Odysseus being given Poseidons place. But allowed to bestow himself and Penelope with longevity (they are like the gods) the song is “Not even death will do us part.”

[jacaeryslover]

THE BET: a spencer reid one-shot.

summary: in which penelope dares spencer to ask out the first attractive woman he sees, you!

"okay, bet!" says penelope garcia, twisting one of her red ponytails between her fingers, all of them adorned with sparkly and colorful jewelry.

"but why? i already told you i'm perfectly capable of asking a girl out" replies spencer, almost too quickly, not at all helping his situation.

"just accept the bet pretty boy, or are you scared you won't make it?" added derek morgan, finding amusement in the situation spencer had put himself into, he obviously would seize every opportunity to tease the young boy.

"alright, i'll do it" spencer finally concede.

just moments before ordering his usual coffee, spencer reid noted something different, someone unfamiliar. this was his most frequented coffee shop, the place was small, quiet and most of the times you could see the same 3 faces. but not today, today he noticed you. the moment he laid eyes on you in he could see you were the most beautiful woman he had ever met, the moment he saw you seated there in the small—but comfortable—couch, remembered him of penelope garcia's bet.

now he had to ask you out.

he didn't want to disturb your peace, so he approached slowly, careful. "hi" he said—regretting his poor choice of words almost instantly, he could've said "hello there" or something friendlier—what are you reading?"

he—thankfully—noticed she had a book in her hands, one that he couldn't see previously mainly because he was nervous, so nervous he thought he couldn't even talk.

"oh, hi. i'm reading demian. have you ever read it? it's actually really good. i thought i wouldn't like it but my sister demanded it was a "must read" she blurted out, why? she doesn't know, she was an easy-to-get-to-know kinda person. she usually didn't think much of it. unless a tall and hot brunnette showed the minimal amount of interest in her. now she thought he thought she was weird.

oversharing was just part of who she was, and he was thankful for it, because all of his limited social skills suddenly dissappeared.

"yes, i read it once." he muttered quietly, trying to keep all the information he had on said story to himself, he didn't want to scare her before actually asking her out.

"so... i was thinking... maybe we could meet up again? i have to go to work right now but i would find it lovely to meet you again...

if you'd like."

he seemed like a nice person she thought, so she agreed to meet him in this coffee shop, tomorrow, at 6pm.

just before he leaved he heared the sound of her voice "i never got your name!" she had said.

"i'll tell you tomorrow, so make sure you come" he shouted, almost bumping onto someone on his way out.

...

"so..." he started with a grin slowly showing on his face as he stepped onto the room, watching his teammates already seated in the oh-so-common round table "we never said what i was going to win if i got a date".

[hunterofartemis7]

After Odysseus left for war, Penelope kept all his clothes, capes, jewelry etc tucked safely away in the closet for when he returned. She allowed no one touch them, not even herself really, that was until Telemachus found them. She left Telemachus alone with one of the maid, who was Athena in disguise, while she went to handle queen stuff. She came back a few hours later to find her son hiding under one of his fathers capes, and wearing one of his tops that was way to big for the baby. The young princess also somehow managed to get a hold of his father’s jewelry which he was both wearing, and trying to eat.

Penelope was of course confused as to how her infant son even got into a locked closet until she saw Athena trying not to laugh her head off.

“I’m sorry,” the goddess laughed, “he kept trying to get in the closet and I can’t say no to his little wolf eyes.”

Penelope wanted to be angry at her husbands mentor, but couldn’t when she saw how cute her son looked. She smiled and picked him up off the floor. “You’ll grow into them someday my son.”

“I can make small version of Odysseus clothes for Telemachus if you want. Just until he grows into them.” Athena offered, picking some of the random clothes off the floor.

“You just want an excuse to make my son small outfits.”

“Guilty.” The goddess smiled. “But I’m not hearing a no.”

The queen submitted and agreed to let Athena make smaller versions of her husband clothes for her son. She can’t say she didn’t hate it. Penelope liked seeing Telemachus crawling around like a small copy of Odysseus. As years went on, Athena continued to do this for Telemachus, while occasionally clipping a piece of Odysseus jewelry to his shirt or cape. Penelope loved seeing how exited Telemachus would get when his grandmother or aunt said he looked just like his father. He’d run around the place pretending to fight a boar like his father, getting a laugh out of the guards who saw him. Telemachus even convinced his mom to cut his hair like his father for a while. But as 10 years turns to 15, to 20, Telemachus had actually grown into Odysseus clothes and had no reason to have copies made anymore. He did it to feel closer to his father, and hoped he wouldn’t be mad when he came home. The suitors were the first to make a bad comment about it. They teased him from wanting to look like a knock off Odysseus, or for dressing like the man who abandoned him.

One real bad experience with Antonius made him want to stop wearing them all together, but Athena encouraged him to ignore what those other men were saying and wear them anyway. He was honoring his father by wearing the clothes. So he kept at it. When Odysseus was finally home, he didn’t immediately notice his son was wearing his clothes, just that his armor resembled Athena. Actually he barely noticed that until late at night once everyone was asleep and he was replaying the memories in his head. It wasn’t till the next morning after he had taken a bath that Odysseus went to his closet and found all his old clothes had disappeared, minus a few that were to big for him.

“Hey Penelope, did you hide my clothes somewhere?” He asked “I mean I don’t mind walking around nude in front of you, but I’d rather not traumatize our son.”

Penelope had a good idea where they were, but was gonna let her husband figure it out. “No, I always kept them in there.”

“Huh.” Odysseus there confused for a moment before grabbing one of the oversized garments from the his wardrobe. “Well this’ll work for now till I figure this out.”

Penelope held back from laughing, “this is going to be a fun morning.” She thought to herself.

“Well if you’re ready, we should head down to breakfast.” Penelope held her hand out for her husband. “Don’t want to miss your first real meal with your son.”

Meanwhile, Telemachus was getting ready in his chamber. He had snatched on of his father garments, jewelry, belt and sword holster. He’d already be out the door if Athena, (who had been staying with the royal family since his diplomatic mission) would quit fussing with his hair. “Athena knock it off!” He groaned trying to pull his head away.

“Once I get it out of your face I will, now hold still!” She snapped, making him face forward.

“Did you do this to dad?”

“When we were training yes.” She answered, cutting Telemachus hair out of his face. “Until he learned to put it up himself.”

“Okay okay okay!” He got up and shook the hair off him.

“Why do I even try?” Athena signed setting the scissors down. “You should head out now. Your parents are probably waiting for you.”

“Aren’t you coming?” He asked her.

Athena shook her head, “go on ahead without me, I’ll be there in a minute.”

The young prince nodded and ran out to the dining room to meet up with his parents. He ran in there and plopped down beside Odysseus, who had just figured out where all his clothes had gone. “Morning father!” He said brightly.

“Morning.” Odysseus replied looking at his son’s clothes. Penelope was across from Telemachus, trying not to laugh at her husband who was trying to find the right words to address this. Telemachus noticed both the strange smiles on his parents faces and got confused. “What?” He asked.

“Nothing. Just surprised my old wardrobe fits you.”

Telemachus was a bit confused by the comments until he remembered that he was in fact wearing his father’s clothes. The boys face turned bright red with embarrassment and he practically shot out of his seat, apologizing over and over again to his father and saying his go change. Odysseus grabbed his arm and pulled him back into his seat.

“My son you have no reason to apologize.” The old king said patting his son on the back. “Im glad to see you have my same taste in style.” Telemachus buried his face in his hands at his father’s teasing.

“He actually started wearing them to be closer to you.” Penelope told her husband whose face lit up in awe.

“Awwwww really?” Odysseus beamed, putting an arm around his son. “That’s really sweet my boy.” Telemachus buried his head in his father’s hair, his face beat red with embarrassment. It didn’t help when Odyssues made the comment about needing a whole new wardrobe since it seemed a little owl had nicked his. “So is this a new thing or?” Odyssues began to ask.

“No, he’s done this since you left for Troy.” His wife answered, which surprised Odysseus.

“Really?” The king asked, “that long?”

“Yeah. He managed to get a few of your things from your closet, well, Athena unlocked it and let him go nuts.” The Queen explained. “And both her and I made smaller versions of your closet until he grew into your normal ones.”

“Ofc Athena had an hand in this.” Odysseus thought to himself. “Please tell me you kept those, cause I would love to see them.”

“Ofc I did.” She smiled.

“Yes!” Odysseus cheered.

Penelope smiled at her boys. Odysseus who was very excited and Telemachus who was an embarrassed mess. “You two are so cute.”

@platinumink

[l-egionaire]

My Warrior!Penlope AU: Final Boss

So, in my Warrior Penelope AU, I mentioned that Penelope would spend ten years in the land of the giants before then making her way home. This begs the question: If Penelope never pisses off Poseidon or Amphirite, who's the "final boss" of her journey? The last enemy she has to overcome before making it home and killing the suitors? Easy: Antiphates.

If you don't know who that is, in mythology, he's the king of the Laestrygonian's (the giants who live in the Land of the Giants and who back sing for Poseidon in "Ruthlessness.") And he's the major obstacle to Penelope during her time in the Land of the Giants.

When she first arrived, she'd met a young giant lady gathering water from a fountain and kindly asked her for her help. The young woman led her to the mansion of the king and she humbly asked for help from him to return home. Unfortunately, she found no hospitality there, for the king immediately decided to eat her and only a well thrown axe into his eye was able to save her from ending up going down his throat.

And her troubles only grew from there. The king ordered his men to go the shore and hurl rocks in order to destroy her single vessel, stranding her there. Then, he'd put out a kind of bounty on her head with all his citizens, saying that she was to be eaten on sight. Thus, Penelope spent the next ten years struggling to survive, having to scurry from place to place like a rat and live in a cramped, wet cave in order to avoid being seen and hunted down. The few times she was caught, she then had no choice but to flee or, if she could, work to kill her discoverer, at one point even having to kill a giant child who had found her and was following his parents instructions to get her.

After getting her blessed arrows and quiver that constantly replenished themselves from Artemis in her tenth year, Penelope went to work systematically killing giants one by one. Using her superior speed and smaller size to fire off volleys of arrows into their eyes, feet, ears and necks in order to bring them down close enough that she could use the new axes, spear and spiked shield she'd carved from the dead bones of their tribesmen to slit their throats or stab their necks in the proper place to make them bleed out. Once she'd killed as many as possible, she proceeded to go straight to the kings manor, where she found him sitting on his throne.

She stood before him, soaked in the blood of his people and, in an eerily calm voice, told him that the bounty on her head was over, that she would be making a boat and leaving and that before she did, she was going to kill him to make him pay for having trapped her in this hell. The king laughed at her so hard, he could barely see through the tears of mirth in his eyes. As he thanked her for giving him such a good laugh before he had a nice snack......she shot an arrow straight into his mouth, piercing his uvula.

The king screamed and clutched his throat, and the battle began. The smashing of clubs, the hurling of ship sized fists, the firing of arrows and hurling of spears....and it all ended with the king on the floor, the outside of his throat now bleeding as profusely as the inside.

For a moment, Penelope was filled with wild glee, the monster that had kept her prisoner away from her family for so long now dead. And then-

"ANTIPHATES!"

"DAD!"

Two sets of footsteps quaked through the manor as the kings wife and daughter ran over yo his dying body, his wife cradling him tenderly.

"No, No, No! P-please! Don't leave me...." Tears flowed down the queen's face like a river down a mountain's peak. She gave a grieving, angry glare at Penelope. "YOU MONSTER! YOU TOOK MY HUSBAND!"

Penelope's hands trembled. As she stared at them all, just for a second, she wasn't looking at the queen of the giants and her daughter holding the king, but rather herself and Telemachus holding a dying Odysseus.

She then recalled the words of another giant that she had slain, practically a lifetime ago.

"What gives you the right to deal a pain so deep? Don't you know that pain you sow is pain you reap?"

While her daughter clutched her father's dead body, the queen then rose to her full towering height and glared down at Penelope.

"You're going to PAY for this!"

The fingers on her bow stilled....and Penelope raised it up to point at the queen's face.

"No. I won't."

THWACK!

After another hour of fighting, of running, of screams of rage and tears and death, Penelope left the mansion even more bloodstained than before, her face weary but numb and went to begun building her boat. Hoping to leave the land and its nightmares behind.

[kindred-spirit-93]

WOULD U FALL IN LOVE WITH ME AGAIN

aight i just had the sickest idea for a wyfilwma animatic ill never draw lol. also starting from smack down the middle bc why not:

ody starts narrating 20 years worth of war crimes and trauma and his body and facial expessions are very heavy, the lines on his face only grow deeper with each verse and his posture more hunched, grey hairs more visible etc

now when the camera points to penelope the focus here on how she mirrors him bc homophrosyne baby. the crows feet the greying hair the tears in her eyes and the pained expression are all accentuated here bc its hard to add and balance her own 20 years of suffering with odys already quick paced and shifting narrtive

to emphasise again shes not smiling, shes still calculating and thinking, shes pained and you can see how much the passage of time and stress took a toll on her too. she really sells it and ody looks like hes about to die if he gets rejected lol

she gestures to the wedding bed and gives him a final test of sorts (he absolutely won her hand like 5 minutes ago when he strung the bow and shot thru 12 axes hehe) and the very last frame is a smirk from her

ody staggers to their bed, the bed he so carefully and lovingly carved for his love and reached out to a post to make sure its all real. its all really real and hes finally home

he sings the part about how he built it blah blah and then turns around sharply with red hot fury and bitter tears in his eyes "at do you realise what you have asked me?"

now pen is right behind him and yells "only my husband knew that!" and he falls back onto the bed in shock lol bc i think its funny, but also bc now penelope can extend a hand to help him up which is symbolism TO ME for how she pulls him out of the darkest depths of his mind, how she was his tether to reality and sanity all those years away from her and their home. to me its also him like *realising* hes finally home (and ready for their therapy saga lol) by taking her hand its like im home at last, yes im a mess but we will heal. together

BUT WAIT THERES MORE ody accepting penelopes hand is like him accepting HER proposal just after he won HER hand downstairs. god i love them

anyway she pulls him up (my stronk queen) he falls to his knees as he sings penelope and she follows suit, singing that hes her husband through and through and they embrace FINALLY. I PRONOUNCE U HUSBAND AND WIFE U MAY BREAK DOWN IN TEARS TOGETHER. AMEN

OH AND THEY HOLD HANDS. *dies*

[yarart4ever]

“Yeah I’ve never been big on media surrounding greek mythology, the lore behind them are always too messy and I’ve never had any media of the sort capture me as mu—“ gets hit by a truck of emotions listening to Epic ~~~~ I’ve been OBSESSED with this musical ever since I’ve heard the Circe saga and seeing the finale not too long ago totally solidified this musical to have a special place in my heart. Circe and Penelope my beloveds!!! 💜 So yeah instead of focusing on my portfolio or being productive in anyway… this is how I’m choosing to spend my evening. Shut up, I know— Also hehehehe I keep thinking of kfp animatic ideas with epic :33

[softestqueeen]

prompt 23 "Can I sleep in your room tonight? Is that a weird thing to ask?" for Penelope Garcia x fem!reader?

congrats on 500!! <3

a/n: thank you sm for requesting something! i had a lot of fun writing this (even though i'm not happy with the aprupt end) and i'm so glad to finally have written someting with garcia, because she is honestly such an underated character! she also looks so insanely pretty in this gif. but anyways, enjoy <3 warnings: mentioning of fictional case, just fluff I 1167 words pairing: penelope garcia x fem!reader special prompts I special masterlist

There were only very few instances where Penelope Garcia had to leave her Badcave and travel with her fellow colleagues of the BAU.

This time, the unit chief Aaron Hotchner, thought her expectise could be very helpful on sire, so here she was in Detrot, Michigan.

No matter how much she loved her colleagues, who were more her family than anything, she really didn't like the gruesome details and crime scene pictures. But unfortunately, being on site meant being way too close to these crazy sickos than she'd like.

This case was especially gruesome, the lifeless bodies of young women turning up almost daily, intricate online puzzles forums demanding every waking moment of Penelope's mind. The murderer(s) left the clues to these sites on his crime scnes, which meant Garcia wasn't just in the precinct with them, but had to go to the actual crime scenes.

Until now it was easy for the technical analyst to distance herself from the crimes, shenanigans with Morgan and cute baby animal videos serving as the perfect distraction for the gruesome murders.

The last victim though, hit a little too close to home.

When Garcia arrived at the crime scene with you, her best friend whom she also has a very big crush on, she could already feel the weird energy. The flat in which the victim would have been quite nice, if it weren't for the blood covering almost every surface of the living room.

But what really shook Penelope to her very core, was how much the victim looked like you. Similar hair colour, length, features and even the dress she was wearing could have been easily taken out of your wardrobe.

The technical analyst couldn't bare to stay for long, taking the nessecary evidence and quickly excusing herself to get some fresh air. She waited outside until you were done surveying the rest of the scene.

The moment your best friend hastily excused herself from the scene, you knew something was wrong. You knew this was hard for her, but this scene seemed to be very personal for her. Trying to wrap things up as fast as possible, you quickly joined Garcia again and the two of you wenr back to the station.

Not too long after you went back, Hotch told you all to get back to the hotel and get some rest.

Penelope was glad that she could finally get some rest and didn't have to look at the pictures of a woman that looked so much like you. Since seeing a more normal picture of the last victim, she realised that all of the past victims had similar traits to you.

The first victim had the same haircut, later a victim had the same nose and one even had the same first name. Oh boy, she did not like that.

When she got to her room, she took a shower, put on her comfiest pyjamas and tried to go to sleep. But she just couldn't. Everytime she closed her eyes it wasn't just anyone being brutally stabbed to death, it was you.

So, she decided to calm her mind by going to your room m and check up on you. Just a little hello and a quick hey, are you still alive or have you been stabbed? no? great, then have a good night and then she would be on her way again. Right, that's what she would do.

Garcia got up, put on her fluffy slipper and went to your room. Before knocking, she hesitated. Were you already asleep? Were you curently showering? But she also knew that she had to see you or she wouldn't be able to sleep.

What she failed to think about was that she was wearing her pyjamas and so would you. So, when you opened the door in short shorts and a tight tank top with no bra, Penelope was momentarily speechless.

“Oh, hey Garcia. Is everything all right?” Your question was justified after she had been weird after seeing the last crime scene.

“Oh- um hey, so yes- uhm no? Actually, I’m not alright could I come in?” Garcia quickly snapped out of it, her voice getting more quiet though with her last sentence.

“Yes, of course. You know you can always talk to me about anything, you know that.” You opened the door for your best friend and sat down on your bed, gesturing for her to do the same.

“Can I sleep in your room tonight? Is that a weird thing to ask? Oh no, I think it is, forget I said anything.” Penelope hadn’t even panned to say this, but in this moment, she realised that this was the only thing that would ultimately bring her any comfort.

“Garcia, that is not weird at all. Of course you can sleep in my room, like a sleepover.” You were glad that she wasn’t looking at you in that moment, because just thinking about sharing a bed with your crush (who was unfortunately also your best friend) brought a blush to your cheeks.

“You know you don’t have to talk about what’s on your mind, but just know, you don’t have to be embarrassed about anything, okay?” you told her with a gentle voice before putting your hand on her shoulder and rubbing comforting circles on into her skin.

Not wanting to pressure her into talking, you suggest laying down pulling the comforter back for Garcia and slipping under the covers next to her. Before you laid down though, you put on the bedside lamps and turned off the big light, creating a cozy atmosphere.

Once you’ve both settled in, Garcia admitted with a small voice. “They look like you.”

“Who?”

“The victims. When we went into this apartment today, I didn’t just see a dead woman, but I saw you. And since then, I realised that a lot of them have similar traits to you. I can’t stop thinking about you laying there with stab wounds all over you. I cannot lose you.”

Her voice was oh so soft and by the end a few tears had escaped her eyes. You lean over to her and cup her cheeks, wiping away her tears.

“Oh, Garcia, but I’m here. Nothing has happened, I’m alive and well. I didn’t realise seeing that crime scene made you so upset, even though I realised that something was off. I’m sorry you had to see that.”

“It’s fine, I think. I already feel a bit better, even though I’m crying at the moment. I’m just sick of seeing all those sickos doing this disgusting stuff to women who look like you.”

You knew in that moment, that what your best friend needed the most at the moment, was reassurance, not just verbally. So, you scooted closer to her and pulled her in for a big hug, which Garcia immediately responded to, wrapping her arms around you.

“I’m here for you, always.”

That night, Penelope could comfortably fall asleep without worries.

the requests for this event are OPEN! here are the prompts!

a/n: i hope you liked this, if so please leave some notes, likes, reblogs and comments! feedback is very appreciated! i’d like to write more with criminal minds characters, so if you have any ideas/requests lmk!!

please also consider supporting my ao3: @ softestqueeen

requests open!

taglist: @silvermagnolias@milywatermelon@bigbananaa

[lalilaloli]

So, I’ve been thinking and just had to get this off my chest. The reunion between Athena and Odysseus. Just like the majority of the Epic fandom, I was left heartbroken after that scene. I wanted more. I wanted a reunion which reunited their friendship. Instead their reunion was bittersweet at best. Some fans have even criticised how it was written and claimed that Odysseus was ungrateful and acted like an asshole when he didn’t accepted Athena’s olive branch with open arms (no pun intended! I repeat, no pun intended!). But can we give the man a break? When Athena left him, 10 years ago, they parted on very bad terms. Athena had then been Odysseus mentor for how long? 15 years? 20? Odysseus trusted her. Admired her. Both as a goddess, as a mentor and as a friend. Then came Troy. A war he didn’t even wanted to be a part of. A war which lasted for 10 years. And then came the murder of the infant. That was the beginning of the end for Odysseus. That was when he started to break. He never forgave himself for that. And Athena condemned him for that. Not for the killing but for his regret, his conscience, his heart. Instead of showing the minimum of empathy or support she simply told him to focus on his mind, not his heart. That he was suppose to be a warrior of the mind. Not the heart and that he couldn’t expect any sympathy from her. Already then the respect and friendship Odysseus felt for her started to crack. Because Odysseus wasn’t a war machine with a cold heart. He didn’t want to be that. Then all hell broke loose with Polyphemus and the death of Polites. His best friend, the one which encouraged Odysseus to be a good man, to show mercy and love. Now, was Odysseus an idiot in how he handled the situation? Yes. He made 2 gigantic mistakes (let Polyphemus live and tell him his real name) we can all agree on that. He should have listened to Athena but Athena had (unknowingly for her) already damaged Odysseus trust and respect for her. Odysseus was heartbroken, angry full of guilt and the goddess he loved and trusted now only seemed to treat him like a thing. According to her should listen to her, man up, shut up and stop being a crybaby. That’s not how a friend acts. So he was hurt, angry and just as disappointed in her as she was in him. In their goodby she threw their friendship in his face and clearly showed him what a fool he had been. So now had Odysseus not only lost his best mortal friend, he now lost his friendship with Athena and also found out that she didn’t even consider them to be friends. That for her he was only a protege, a failed student, and the things that made Odysseus a man, his heart, his conscience, his warmth, his empathy, was useless and only an weakness.

Now 10 years later Athena and Odysseus has gone 2 completely separate ways. Odysseus has been through hell. He has forced himself to become a monster. The last thing he wanted to become. The complete opposite of the man he once was. He done things he never can forgive himself for. Just to be able to come home to Penelope and Telemachus. We don’t know what Athena has been up to but she certainly has been in to some soul searching. That’s obvious in “We’ll be fine”. She has understood that what she and Odysseus had was friendship. That she does care about him. And that she might have done some misstakes in her past. Something which is probably quite difficult to swallow for a goddess. But Athena has grown and matured.

When they finally meet again they’ve both changed. In a perfect world Odysseus would take Athena’s hand and they once again would be friends. But Odysseus has been through hell and back. To get home he has sacrificed everything, even himself and his own humanity. He turned into a heartless monster without mercy. He turned into something that is no longer the man he once was. He turned into somebody he’s no longer sure Penelope can love. He no longer believes that the man Odysseus exists. That the only thing left is the monster Odysseus. He has lost himself and he’s terrified. Now Athena stands in front of him and ask him to try again. For his friendship, for them to make the world a better place. But he can’t. How could he? How could he now that he’s a monster? A man full of shame. And he so, so tired. He doesn’t want to be a warrior anymore. He doesn’t want to continue fighting. He just wants to be a husband and a father. And he believes that he’s change so much that he’s not even sure that Penelope even can love him again. So he can’t take the outstretched hand Athena offer him. Even if he wants to. He’s too broken. Too exhausted. But… I still believe that we shall se this as an open ending. A comma instead of a full stop. Odysseus is not ready to be Athena’s protege again, he might not even be ready to rebuild their friendship right now. But I think that Athena’s words when they reunite affects Odysseus emotional and mental healing. The knowledge that Athena is there, that she believes in him and that she cared. That she always did even if she didn’t admit that even for herself. Because Odysseus needs healing and he needs time. Time for once again be that man who believed in goodness and mercy. The man who was Athena’s friend. And, when you hear the softness in the voice of Athena’s final words to Odysseus, she knows it too.

So can we please give the poor man a break?

[evieismol]

Big Bend - Chapter Eight

Word count: 938

Cw: cursing

Previous

Easton's pov

“Hey! So, I hear we’re finally on the same planet again!” Larissa said, her familiar face appearing on my phone screen. It had been years since I’d seen the human I’d initially met when she and her friends had become stranded on Aphirial in person, but we’d kept in touch with regular video calls and text messages. 

 I laughed. “We are!”

“How are you liking Earth? And how is it being the one that’s the wrong size this time?” She asked, giving me a wry smile at the last part. 

“Well, the days are definitely a lot shorter here,” I said. “I feel like as soon as I fall asleep it’s time to get up. I guess it was the opposite for you guys - waiting for me to wake up or get back from work or whatever must have felt like it was taking forever.”

“Yeah, it was weird. At least we got to sleep in pretty much always, though, so we might have won on that front.” 

“I wish that was the case for me,” I murmured, then shook my head, forcing myself to brighten my tone. “It’s been good overall though! The people here are really nice too.” 

“That’s good! Made new friends to replace us yet?” Larissa joked. 

“As if,” I said. “Speaking of which, is Kyle around?” 

Larissa shook her head. “He got called into work today. I know, lame.”

Larissa and Kyle had become roommates when they’d returned to Earth, settling in the coastal city of Los Angeles. The third human who’d been stranded, Ruby, had also kept closely in touch with them, though her job as a travelling nurse meant that catch ups were more frequently than not over facetime. Much like ours - I hadn’t seen any of the three humans in person since they’d left Aphiria. 

“Damn. Well, tell him I said hi!” I said. 

“I will! So, what’re your coworkers like?”

 “They really are all nice. My supervisor, John, is very, like, upbeat. I swear he must live off of coffee or something. I’m pretty sure one of them is kind of terrified of me. Or dislikes me. Or maybe both, I’m not really sure, but I’ve been trying to be like, extra friendly? I mean, not that I blame him, given the whole giant thing.

Uh, I’m not the only non human working here though. One of my other coworkers - Angie, she’s cool - convinced her best friend Penelope to come work out here, and she’s a vampire.”

“A vampire, that’s neat,” Larissa said. “I haven’t actually met very many.”

“She seems pretty chill. She’s like, very extroverted. Oh, and her roommate Zoey seems cool too.” I wasn’t totally sure why I felt like I needed to sound casual mentioning Zoey, or why I was hit with the immediate urge to talk more about Zoey. Regardless, I found myself recounting Zoey and I’s first meeting, rambling about how she’d seemed remarkably unconcerned to run into a giant in the middle of the night. Surprised, but not actually scared, even once I’d let slip that I was from Aphiria.

That then turned into rambling about how cool her outfits also were - a colorful mix of crochet, tie dye, and chunky jewelry when she wasn’t at work. And then that turned into mentioning how radiant her smile was, and it was at about that time that I noticed the knowing look on Larissa's face. I faltered. 

“Uh, yeah. So she's nice. Like everyone else. They're all nice.” 

“Sounds like you might think she's a little bit nicer than everyone else?” Larissa asked teasingly. 

“I don’t know what you mean.” I was not good at playing dumb. 

“Sure,” Larissa said, drawing the word out. “I can't wait to tell Kyle and Ruby that you have a crush.” She said the last part of her sentence in a sing-songy tone. 

“I do not! Can't I just appreciate someone's fashion sense?” 

“And ‘radiant smile’?”

I felt like face palming. 

Why did I say that? 

“Objectively speaking.” I tried again. “She just has a nice smile.” 

“Uh huh. I think I got like, a sentence about everyone else there and an entire monologue about her, so you're not fooling anyone.” 

“I don't have-I'm not interested-I don't like her like that. Besides, she's-she's a human.” I stammered. 

“What, us humans aren't good enough for you?” 

"No! No, I didn't mean it like that, I fully think humans are equal to aphirials-of course-that just came out wrong." If I'd felt flustered before, it was now a thousand times worse. 

"Hm, I dunno, you said that awfully fast," Larissa teased. 

"I just meant like - I don't have a crush on her-" I ignored the look Larissa gave me and continued, "but even if I did, there'd be like...a kind of concerning power imbalance? If I did like a human, which I don't, I wouldn't want them to feel pressured into anything or something because I'm, well," I gestured at myself.

"Half the humans I meet - actually, probably more like 70% of the humans I meet, are at least a little scared of me already. And what if I told a human that I theoretically had a crush on that I felt that way and then they didn't feel the same way but felt like they couldn't say that and-and there's just a lot of potential problems there," I ended lamely. 

Larissa and I were both silent for a moment. 

"...You've put a lot of thought into the subject for someone who doesn't have a crush on a human," Larissa said finally. 

I sighed. 

Fuck.

[fanofstuff01]

Adam’s eyes widened: Mm!~

He had no idea what was happening, but he was too stunned to react. And the smallest part of him actually liked having a kiss after god knows how long…

Avery: GASP! You actually did it daddy!! Thank you so much!!

It only went on for about a few seconds before Adam finally came back to his senses with her yell and pushed Lucifer off of himself shocked and embarrassed. Lucifer didn’t complain at all.

Lucifer, wiping his mouth with his sleeve, slightly yellow: Happy now?

Adam held his lips: It wasn’t supposed to be on the lips!!! She said

Lucifer blinked, fuck did he get that wrong?

Lucifer: Shit man. Sorry.

Adam scoffed and wiped his own mouth, much more aggressively than how Lucifer did so.

Lucifer, under his breath: As if your mouth is so fucking…

Adam: .. Whatever. Over and done with.

He turned to his kids completely ignoring the angel nearby.

Adam: Alright! Now that your presents are done, who wants a special show for the holiday?~

Charlie/Avery: ME!! ME!!!!

Abel: By “show” you mean..

Adam: Penelope.

Abel: Yess!

Lucifer: Wait- Who the fuck is Penelope?

Adam turned to him as if he forgot he was there.

Adam: You’d laugh.

Lucifer: I probably would, but I’ll annoy you about it for the rest of the day, so your choice.

Adam blew out some air: It’s my guitar. Happy?

Lucifer: ……… You actually named your-

Adam: ANYWAY! I assume everyone does, eh?

Cain shrugged: Sure, why not.

Lucifer: I DON’T!

Adam: Too bad you don’t count, I’ll be back in a sec.

Happy birthday!! Here have a little something 😁

-

Lilo and Stitch Au

✨ Christmas Edition ✨

Adam sat on his couch with his coffee and watched the snow fall outside as the twilight of the morning became slowly more grey than black from the cloud covered haze.

Christmas was coming and this year he wouldn't be with his kids..... He was going to miss them so much and that was all he wanted was for them to be here with him around the tree, opening gifts and stuffing their faces full of sweets.

But it wasn't meant to be he guessed....

Lucifer, the heaven born Angel with an attitude problem that was made to come down and be Adams companion slowly made his way from his own room into the living room and paused when he saw Adam sitting there posed to the patio glass slide in doors as if he was watching television.

Lucifer: You're up early.

Adam didn't even flinch when he heard the voice, too used to it by now.

Adam: I never went to sleep. Couldn't.

Lucifer frowned and tried not to roll his eyes, humans complain about a lack of sleep and then willingly don't do the sleep? They were weird and backwards in ways he will never understand.

Lucifer: Oh.

He was just going to grab coffee and go back to his room but something was eating at him to further make sure Adam was okay.

Lucifer walked over and sat beside him with his own mug, he looked out to the falling snow. It was calming and nice.

Adam: I won't see my kids until January.....

Lucifer nodded, he knew that Adams kids meant a lot to him.

Lucifer: How come?

Adam: Their mothers are bitches that's why.

Adam took a breath: The snow just reminds me of when we were together and times were better.

And he wasn't alone.

Lucifer: I'll be here.

Adam: Not that you want to be.

Lucifer winced, okay yeah he's made it clear that he doesn't want to be here period many a time but .......

Everyone deserves a pass on the holidays.

Lucifer: Maybe..... But no one deserves to be alone.

Adam hummed as he took a sip: Thank you Luci.

Lucifer smiled and rolled his eyes: Don't get fucking sappy on me.

Adam smirked: Me? Sappy? Never.

AAHH THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I WAS CRAVING FOR THIS AU!!

Have a cat!!

-

Lucifer: You’re a fucking human, that’s you guys’ entire point. Being sentimental over eeverything.

He gave his voice a more dramatic tone making Adam snicker and playfully smack him.

Adam: Oh shut up. Says the guy who threw a hissy fit over not being able to fly anymore.

Lucifer: Hey! Flying means a part of an angels identity, one of the many many things that prove we are leagues above any mortal creatures we’ve created, and what define angels as the righteous hands of God!

Adam rolled his eyes and just went back to his coffee, even when at his “generosity” moments the little bastard still managed to unironically place himself on a pedestal.

And do it theatrically even.

Adam: ..So?

Lucifer: So! It is very much worth getting angry over when you lose it! Because you lose a part of your whole being.

Adam: … Who said my kids aren’t mine?

His voice got lower and his eyes fell back to his coffee, remembering how his kids would suggest they could add marshmallows to their dad’s drink too. And how he’d do just for the sake of them. Cain would always get whenever he didn’t eat it..

The self-praising and slightly arrogant face of Lucifer slowly faded when he saw how silent Adam went again. He almost wanted to audibly groan but only let out a small sigh, why was it this hard to keep humans stable? One moment they would be completely fine and then they’d go all melancholic again.

Irritating. But..

He inhaled a little and got closer to Adam, just for the sake of only this day he could ignore how annoying this creature was.

Lucifer: Soo… Wanna go outside? For a walk or something? I don’t-

Adam’s lips curled with a small smile.

Adam: You just want to play out there in the snow don’t you?

[wildeatmidnight]

The first time Colin Bridgerton encountered Penelope as Lady whistledown... red eyes tears rolling down his face as if without his knowing it himself... that look of love, heart break and horror at being betrayed all on his face... I will tell you I was SCARED.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Started a new book series, and has been a journey...an Odyssey, if you will.

[gingermintpepper]

Okay, let's finally talk about EPIC's Apollo

I feel very compelled to say, first of all, that I do not dislike Epic. In fact, I am very fond of Epic and have been following its production and status very eagerly! I attend all the launch streams, I watch all of Herrans' update videos; I am, at the end of the day, a fan and I want it to be known that my words are spoken out of love and passion as much as they are spoken from a place of critique.

So really, what my problem with Epic's Apollo?

In the briefest possible terms; the choice to have Apollo be defined by his musical aspect in God Games is thematically strange. And not in the 'oh well in the Odyssey, Apollo was important to Odysseus and his family so it's weird that that wasn't kept in Epic' strange, strange in the sense that Odysseus' character arc since My Goodbye has been getting more and more obviously Apollonian and so it is positively bizarre that when we get to meet Apollo, the god seems entirely disinterested in him and his affairs. So much so that he is not even defined by any station that would indicate that he has been watching over and protecting Odysseus and his family.

What do I mean by 'Odysseus has been following an Apollonian arc'? I'm so glad you asked!

Remember Them is the last song in which Odysseus explicitly uses his sword until Mutiny where he must use it to defend himself against Eurylochus' blade. He uses it to help enact the plan to conquer Polyphemus and, due to Polites dying in that battle, Polites who wished for Odysseus to put the blade down entirely and embrace a post-war life, Odysseus also retires his sword. This is an action that symbolically separates him from Athena - and the image of Odysseus as a traditional warrior set for him in Horse and Infant - as much as My Goodbye physically separates him from the goddess and her war-ways - from this point onwards, Odysseus will no longer be leaning on Athena's wisdom or methods to solve his problems. Likewise, he will no longer be able to rely on her protection.

Odysseus thusly solves most of his upcoming problems through diplomacy and avoidance. He approaches Aeolus - a strange and ambiguous god (both in gender and in motivation) and appeals to them for help. Circe too, he approaches not with wishes to conquer or for revenge, but for the safe returning of his men and an alternate way forward. In all of these scenarios, there is some Apollonian element which is subtly interweaved alongside the influence of other gods; it is with a bow and arrows that Polyphemus' sheep is slain (and thus it is this Apollonian element which is at the root of Odysseus' spat with Poseidon), it is a vision of Penelope that warns Odysseus that his men are about to open Aeolus' wind-bag, Circe's peace offering to Odysseus is to refer him to a prophet of Apollo who has since died.

In this way, Apollo is walking alongside Odysseus for all of his journey after Athena departs - even in the Underworld, he is guiding him. It is Tiresias' proclamation that is the last straw for Odysseus, it is by the power of a mouthpiece of Apollo that Odysseus decides to embrace his ruthlessness. It is with the bow and arrow that Odysseus subdues the siren who sought to trick him, likewise, Odysseus does not attempt to undermine or escape the fate of paying Scylla's passage price - he knows of the doom about to befall the six men and quite unlike the rest of the journey until this point, he does not fight against it. This all comes to a head on Thrinacia where it is a blade which sacrifices the sun god's cow and brings destruction upon the crew once more.

My point with all of this is that when I heard the teasers for God Games years ago, it made perfect sense to me that Apollo would be Round One - he is not Odysseus' adversary and has no reason to oppose Athena's wish to free him. From other teasers about what will happen in the climax of Epic, Apollo will still be walking alongside Odysseus - it is Apollo's bow that Penelope will give the suitors to string. Likewise, it is Apollo's bow that will prove Odysseus' legitimacy and identity. That bow will be the power by which Odysseus hunts his adversaries and cleans out his palace - it is Apollo who is the avatar of Odysseus' ruthlessness, not Athena.

So tell me, truly, what was the point of having Apollo raise a non-argument in God Games? Why have him appear unconcerned, aloof and slightly oblivious? Why have him appear in his capacity as the Lord of Music at all?? And if the intention was never to make Apollo an active player in Odysseus' life like he was in the Odyssey, why keep Odysseus as a primary archer?

The answer of course is that Apollo is inextricable from the fabric of the Odyssey - his influence and favour exudes from Odysseus just as much as Athena's. In Athena's ten year sulk, it would have been Apollo who kept Telemachus and Penelope safe. It would have been Apollo protecting Odysseus from Poseidon's gaze as he travelled the seas (according to the Odyssey anyway)

Forgive me for not being excited about something that I thought was being purposefully set up. I was extremely ecstatic about all of the little Apollonian details that litter the sagas because I know where this story ends up (loosely) but all God Games did was reveal that maybe those Apollonian details were not intentional at all, but merely the ghost of the Apollo who persistently haunts those he favours, even if he cannot explicitly come to their aide in an adaptation.

[o3o-lapd-o3o]

here's part 7! hope you guys enjoy! part 8 will be uploaded tomorrow!

(p.s my headcanon explainations are in the tags if you're curious)

the post/thread that started this whole au

dinner scene: part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 8

there's a masterlist now!

*after everyone had gone inside, telemachus left to go to his room to change while penelope and odysseus headed to theirs*

*penelope had help getting changed/ready from her handmaiden, however odysseus doesn’t start changing, instead he’s just sitting on a lounge chair looking out the window at the sun setting*

penelope: *now ready for the evening*

penelope: *to her handmaiden* thank you for your help. 

penelope: *smiles as she’s walking to the bedroom door with her* 

penelope: *remembers something* oh! please let the others know to make sure you all grab yourself enough to eat after all the hard work the past couple of days! or take some of the remaining fish & meat home to your families!

penelope: *waves goodbye as her handmaiden leaves the room*

penelope: *closes the door and turns to face odysseus*

odysseus: *still staring out the window*

penelope: odysseus?

odysseus: *no response*

penelope: *understands he doesn’t mean to ignore her* 

penelope: *slowly walks towards him* my love, it's just you and i now

odysseus: *finally realises penelope was calling out to him* 

odysseus: *turns his head to her* i’m sorry penelope

odysseus: *looks her up and down, always amazed by the beauty of his wife*

penelope: *giggles as she see the lovestruck look on odysseus face*

penelope: *stops just in front of him and twirls around*

penelope: see something you like?

odysseus: *standing up and pulls her into him by her waist* 

odysseus: always *goes in for a kiss*

penelope: *accepts the kiss*

penelope: *giggles when odysseus keeps planting kisses all over her face*

penelope: my dear husband, stop distracting me! 

penelope: it’s time for you to get ready.

odysseus: *stops the kisses and looks down and sighs*

penelope: *cups his cheek with her hand and turns his face back to hers* 

penelope: you know i’m not going to force you to wear anything you don’t want to, right?

odysseus: *leans into her hand* i know, i know…

odysseus: it’s so silly of me isn’t, it’s just clothing-

penelope: *now holding his face with both her hands* nothing is silly, not if it makes you uncomfortable my love

odysseus: *smiles* i love you

penelope: *smiles back* i love you too

penelope: *lets his face go* now, what would you like to wear tonight? 

odysseus: *looking at the tyrian purple pelops she's wearing* i would like to match my beautiful wife

penelope: *knows she had a chiton made for him at the same time she had her pelops made* ok, let's get you matching then

*once odysseus is ready, him and penelope leave their room and make their way to the palace entrance ready to greet their dinner guests*

*when they arrive, they see telemachus; who is dressed in more ‘princely’ attire than his usual day-to-day clothing, talking to athena who arrived not long ago*

telemachus: oh! mother, father, you're ready!

athena: *turning to them*

athena: *smiling* good evening

penelope: *smiles back* good evening lady athena

athena: please penelope, i think we’ve known each other long enough… especially after everything in the past year

athena: just athena is fine

penelope: *smiles* sure…athena

odysseus: *looking at athena* 

odysseus: it’s still so weird not seeing you in all your armour

athena: *laughs* well i thought the occasion didn’t require it

*the four of them continue talking for a little bit*

athena: i see that my uncle hasn’t arrived yet.

telemachus: *turns to his father* you told him it was tonight right?

odysseus: *nods* i did

odysseus: *thinks for moment and sighs* 

odysseus: he’s not going to come to this entrance… but i know where he’ll be

athena: i’ll go with you to get him

telemachus: me too!

penelope: *laughs* well i guess i might as well join too

odysseus: let’s go then

*they all head in the direction of the entrance for the palace gardens*

odysseus: *stops them before they all head outside* ok maybe we don’t all need to go down to the sea

odysseus: i’ll go meet him and we’ll both join you shortly

*telemachus, penelope and athena wait by the entrance talking amongst themselves, while odysseus makes his way down to the palace cove*

*odysseus arrives at the cove when he sees poseidon making his way out of the water*

poseidon: *sees odysseus* 

poseidon: king of ithaca

odysseus: *deadpan expression* poseidon.

poseidon: *rolls his eyes at odysseus, for the clear lack of title for him*

odysseus: the others are waiting, shall we get going?

poseidon: *about to agree when he remembers about the arrow*

poseidon: wai- uh i mean, i have a question before we leave…

odysseus: *eyebrow raised* 

poseidon: you're not… i don’t know, mad or angry with me or the sea’s inhabitants by any chance?

odysseus: huh?

poseidon: *pinches the bridge of his nose* has the sea or i, done anything to offend you in the past day?

odysseus: *now confused* no?

poseidon: *drops his hand from his face and then points at odysseus* then why did you shoot me?!

odysseus: *even more confused* shoot yo- whAT?

poseidon: *reaches into his chiton and pulls out the arrow he kept there* 

poseidon: *shows the arrow to odysseus* please tell me then, what have i done that's got you shooting arrows at the sea?

odysseus: *looking at the arrow, then up to poseidon* i've not shot any arrows at the sea? 

odysseus: also, who shoots arrows into the sea?!

poseidon: *hands up in the air in agreement, the arrow being thrown behind him* 

poseidon: that's what i said! but who else would it be? it hit the waters of this cove, so unless-

odysseus: *suddenly realises where the arrow has come from*

odysseus: *starts laughing*

poseidon: *brings his hands down and narrows his eyes at odysseus* what is so funny?

odysseus: *wiping a tear away from his eye from laughing so much* my son

poseidon: *now his turn to be confused* huh?

odysseus: *having collected himself * my son, he shot the arrow during archery practice

poseidon: *eyebrow raised* and you're teaching your son to shoot the sea… because?

odysseus: *rolls his eyes* it was an accident, my wife startled him and he misfired. 

odysseus: *lets out a tiny chuckle* i can’t believe it made its way to the sea though 

poseidon: oh

odysseus: yeah ‘oh’ 

odysseus: why would you think i’d shoot the sea anyway? 

poseidon: *arms now crossed and looking away from odysseus* 

poseidon: who knows with you…

odysseus : *smirking* oh poseidon…i’d just use other ways to get your attention

poseidon: *whips his head back to odysseus* 

poseidon: *sees odysseus’ shit-eating grin*

poseidon: oh be quiet… what if i arrived early? 

poseidon: *points at himself* i could have been hit!

odysseus: *snorts* oh please… an single arrow wouldn't kill you

odysseus: besides we both know you've been impaled with worse

odysseus: *turns to head back up to the palace* anyways, let's head up to the others

poseidon: *realising what odysseus said* wait-

poseidon: odysseus of ithaca!

odysseus: *just keeps walking ignoring poseidon’s outburst*

poseidon: *grumbles under his breath but swiftly walks to catch up odysseus* 

*odysseus & poseidon make their way to the palace garden entrance where now only athena is waiting*

odysseus: *looking to athena* where-

athena: *already knows what odysseus is going to ask* they headed to the dining hall.

athena: telemachus wanted to check some final things and penelope left to accompany him.

odysseus: *nods at her explanation*

athena: *turns to look at poseidon*

athena: *nods head at poseidon* uncle

poseidon: *blank look on his face* athena.

athena: *now looking at her nails* not seen you since you were up on olympus in apollo’s infirmary…

athena: *looks back at poseidon and grins* speaking of which… how’s your chest?

poseidon: *scoffs and crosses his arms* fine.

poseidon: *suddenly smirks back* need i remind you that you were also there for a similar  reason…how’s your face?

athena: *grin has left her face and now narrows her eyes at poseidon*

odysseus: *not wanting to deal with two bickering gods* 

odysseus: *sighs*

odysseus: *claps his hands together sharply* OK! how about we don’t fight in my palace, yeah?

odysseus: besides, telemachus has been extremely excited about tonight’s dinner, so i do not want anything ruining it…

odysseus: *makes sure to look at both of them*

odysseus: *red eyes appear & disappear in the blink of an eye*

odysseus: got it?

athena: *now semi-understands why poseidon listened to odysseus ‘requests’* uh-

poseidon: *putting an arm around athena’s shoulders* yep, no arguing here!

poseidon: *turns his head towards athena* isn’t that right my dear niece?

athena: *stares at poseidon in disbelief at the words ‘dear niece’*

athena: *turns to odysseus* you can’t be seri-

odysseus: *raises his eyebrow*

athena: *sighs* sure, no fighting in the palace

odysseus: *smiles* good. now i know you know where the dining hall is located athena, but poseidon doesn’t.

odysseus: so, if you’ll both please follow me.

odysseus: *starts walking down the hall*

athena: *shrugs poseidon’s arm off in disgust and follows odysseus*

poseidon: *sighs and also follows odysseus*