#thanks mason deaver for this story

[magicalyaku]

Thanks for joining me on this ride through 2022! When I started my reading spree in autumn 2021 I did not expect to find so much joy (and sometimes frustation) to motivate me to write hundreds of words about books every month. I read and write what I want and because I want to, but it's nice to know that sometimes there’s actually someone interested in what I have to say. So thank you for even the small interactions. :)

I had to edit this overview like five times because whenever I thought I was done I found another book I missed. So if I counted correctly I have read a total of 93 books (written and audio, not including manga, comics and non-fiction). That is ... a damn lot! Like 6 years combined compared to before. I also reread two of those books and while editing my novel I read it two whole times. That counts, right? (That’s why there’s 94 covers up there. Because i snuck it inbetween. Because I can. uAu) Only 14 of all these books I would categorise as non-queer. Funnily enough, 6 of those I didn’t like very much. Of the remaining 75 queer books I only found 1 book really bad and I’m picky about 2 more. Huh.

On to the award ceremony! (But don’t expect laudations. I wouldn’t shut up.)

Least favourite phrase:

... it smelled like boy.

(from: The Song that moves the Sun, Darius the Great (probably the 2nd) and the third time I already blocked from my mind (Here the Whole Time???)) That sentence came up fucking three times! Seriously. WHY?! I hate it. 8D

Favourite phrase:

But we have more important things to do than hook up.

(from: The Darkness Outside Us) I laughed so hard at this sentence. Finally someone who gets it! All stupid YA heroines should listen to this.

Favourite protagonists:

Jack Shannon (Aces Wild) and Neil Josten (All for the Game)!

Favourite covers:

Least favourite books:

A Far Wilder Magic (Allison Saft) and If You Change Your Mind (Robbie Weber)

Favourite books (no order):

The Darkness Outside Us (Eliot Schrefer)

Aces Wild: A Heist (Amanda DeWitt)

The City Beautiful (Aden Polydoros)

Every Bird a Prince (Jenn Reese)

All for the Game series: (Nora Sacavic)

I Wish You All the Best (Mason Deaver)

I Hope You Get this Message (Farah Naz Rishi)

More books I greatly enjoyed:

Both can be true (Jules Machias)

A Taste of Gold and Iron (Alexandra Rowland)

The Language of Seabirds (Will Taylor)

A Complicated Love Story Set in Space (Shaun David Hutchinson)

At the Edge of the Universe (Shaun David Hutchinson)

Milo and Marcos at the End of the World (Kevin Christopher Snipes)

Little Black Bird (Anna Kirchner)

The Girl Who Fell Beneath the Sea (Axie Oh)

In Deeper Waters (F.T. Lukens)

So this is Ever After (F.T. Lukens)

All that’s Left in the World (Erik J. Brown)

.... aaaand many many more! uAu

Bonus!

At the half year point I actually counted how often the protagonists names were being used throughout those different books. I felt to lazy do to it in detail for the second half, but I can still present you my preliminery count of most used names for the protagonist, love interest and possibly best friend. These came up at least 3 times!

Will/William

Matt

Nate/Nathan

Andrew/Drew

Daniel

Lame, right? 8D My favourite name choice award goes to Rosemary and Rowan from Mirrored in Evergreen by B. Pigeon!

That’s it! Phew! Thanks the universe for books! :D

[aurorawest]

16, 17, 24! :)

16. What is the most over-hyped book you read this year?

Babel by RF Kuang (which I actually finished) and In the Lives of Puppets by TJ Klune (which I DNFed around page 80). For me, Babel fell apart in the final act. I felt like Kuang was trying to tell a story that she simply doesn't yet have the skill as a writer to pull off (she's young!!). I really found myself wishing that she'd waited ten or fifteen years to write the book, because I think it would have really been something to behold.

In the Lives of Puppets...I recently posted my thoughts on it, but I'll just add here that I'm done reading TJ Klune. I have one more of his books in my TBR, which is the sequel to a dystopian novel which was actually good. In the Lives of Puppets was so bad that it actually makes me question that I ever loved his previous books.

17. Did any books surprise you with how good they were?

Answered here!

24. Did you DNF anything? Why?

Lol so many things. I don't know that it's even worth listing them. Notable ones, I guess, were: In the Lives of Puppets by TJ Klune, The Sunbearer Trials by Aiden Thomas, They Hate Each Other by Amanda Woody, The Lost Apothecary by Sarah Penner, The Red Scholar's Wake by Aliette de Bodard, The Feeling of Falling in Love by Mason Deaver, A Dash of Salt and Pepper by Kosoko Jackson, and Spell Bound by FT Lukens.

I DNFed them because, in most cases, they were bad. Lol. A few of them were okay, just not for me, but honestly most of them are just not good.

Thanks for asking!!

end-of-year book ask

[fragilelunar]

2023 Reading Wrap Up

General Stats:

Total Books Read: 105

Pages: 25, 224

Time: 194.17 Hours

Average Rating: 4.31 Stars

Library Books: 41

Books Owned: 14

5 Stars: 38

hello! for my first post on this new blog I figured I'd do a little wrap up of my reading from last year!! Tiny bit of back history to give y'all before I start doing monthly wrap ups and things. I always make my reading goal 50 books so that I can easily hit it and then just vibe the rest of the year btw!!

anyways!! here are all the books I read last year and my ratings of each:

Finale - Stephanie Garber ✭✭✭✭

The Sun Does Shine: How I Found Life and Freedom on Death Row - Lara Love Hardin, Anthony Ray Hinton ✭✭✭✭✭

The Inheritance Games - Jennifer Lynn Barners ✭✭✭✭✭

Unmasked: My Life Solving America's Cold Cases - Paul Holes ✭✭✭✭✭

Aquicorn Cove - K. O'neill ✭✭✭✭✭

Highly Suspicious and Unfairly Cute - Talia Hibbert ✭✭✭✭.5

Doughnuts and Doom - Balazs Lorinczi ✭✭✭✭

The Severed Thread - Leslia Vedder ✭✭✭✭

Anya's Ghost - Vera Brosgol ✭✭✭.5

The Hawthorne Legacy - Jennifer Lynn Barnes ✭✭✭✭

The Final Gambit - Jennifer Lynn Barnes ✭✭✭✭

Cultish: The Language of Fanaticism - Amanda Montell ✭✭✭✭

Babel - R.F. Kuang ✭✭✭✭✭

Save Yourself! - Bones Leopard ✭✭✭✭✭

Blink - Christopher Sebela ✭✭✭

The River Has Teeth - Erica Waters ✭✭✭✭.5

Hold Back the Tide - Melinda Salisbury ✭✭✭✭

Atari and Tika - Efa ✭✭✭✭

Goblin Slayer Vol 1 - Kumo Kagyu ✭✭✭.5

Goblin Slayer Vol 2 - Kumo Kagyu ✭✭✭✭

The Memory Eater - Rebecca Mahoney ✭✭✭✭✭

Legends & Lattes - Travis Baldree ✭✭✭✭

Amari and the Great Game - B.B. Alston ✭✭✭✭.5

Thanks a Lot, Universe - Chad Lucas ✭✭✭✭.5

Coming Back - Jessi Zabarsky ✭✭✭.5

I Wish You All the Best - Mason Deaver ✭✭✭✭✭

Heartstopper Vol 1 - Alice Oseman ✭✭✭✭✭

Heartstopper Vol 2 - Alice Oseman ✭✭✭✭✭

Heartstopper Vol 3 - Alice Oseman ✭✭✭✭✭

Heartstopper Vol 4 - Alice Oseman ✭✭✭✭✭

Chaos & Flame - Tessa Gratton, Justina Ireland ✭✭✭✭

Heart, Haunt, Havoc - Freydis Moon

The Feeling of Falling in Love - Mason Deaver ✭✭✭✭✭

Ana on the Edge - A.J. Sass ✭✭✭✭

Hell Followed With Us - Andrew Joseph White ✭✭✭✭✭

The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes - Suzanne Collins ✭✭.5

Solitaire - Alice Oseman ✭✭✭✭✭

Nick and Charlie - Alice Oseman ✭✭✭✭✭

Radio Silence - Alice Oseman ✭✭✭✭✭

Belle of the Ball - Mari Costa ✭✭✭✭✭

Devil on Her Shoulder - Cédric Mayen ✭✭✭✭

City of Vicious Night - Claire Winn ✭✭✭✭

SpyxFamily Vol 1 - Tatsuya Endo ✭✭✭✭✭

Joe Hill's Rain - David M. Booher, Joe Hill ✭✭✭✭

Small Nozomi and Big Yume - Sou Hamayumiba ✭✭✭

Girls Like Girls - Hayley Kiyoko ✭✭✭✭

Cursed - Marissa Meyer ✭✭✭✭

I Was Born for This - Alice Oseman ✭✭✭✭✭

Threads That Bind - Kika Hatzopoulou ✭✭✭✭✭

Mooncakes - Suzanne Walker ✭✭✭✭

Ellen Outside the Lines - A.J. Sass ✭✭✭✭✭

Always Human - Ari North ✭✭✭✭

Out of the Blue - Jason June ✭✭✭✭

The Backstagers Vol 1 - James Tynion IV ✭✭✭✭.5

The Backstagers Vol 2 - James Tynion IV ✭✭✭✭✭

Dear Mothman - Robin Gow ✭✭✭✭✭

The Alchemy of Moonlight - David Ferraro ✭✭✭✭

Fake Dates and Mooncakes - Sher Lee ✭✭✭✭✭

The Backstagers Vol 3 - James Tynion IV ✭✭✭✭

So This Is Ever After - F.T. Lukens ✭✭✭✭

Bruised - Tanya Boteju ✭✭✭✭✭

Spell Bound - F.T. Lukens ✭✭✭✭.5

Sensory: Life on the Spectrum - Schnumm, Bex Ollerton ✭✭✭✭✭

Gender Is Really Strange - Teddy G. Goetz ✭✭✭✭✭

If You'll Have Me - Eunnie ✭✭✭✭✭

Fourth Wing - Rebecca Yarros ✭✭.5

Ode to My First Car - Robin Gow ✭✭✭.5

Save Me! (From Myself): Crushes, Cats, and Existential Crises - So Lazo ✭✭✭✭✭

Soppy: A Love Story - Philippa Rice ✭✭✭✭

You're Not Supposed to Die Tonight - Kalynn Bayron ✭✭✭

Rebent Sinner - Ivan Coyote ✭✭✭✭

The Bone Shard Daughter - Andrea Stewart ✭✭✭✭

Legendborn - Tracy Deonn ✭✭✭✭

The Bone Shard Emperor - Andrea Stewart ✭✭✭✭.5

The Spirit Bares Its Teeth - Andrew Joseph White ✭✭✭✭✭

Open Throat - Henry Hoke ✭✭✭.5

Girl Juice - Benji Nate ✭✭✭✭

Flavor Girls - Loïc Locatelli-Kournwsky, Eros De Santiago ✭✭✭✭

The Love Report - Béka ✭✭✭.5

Last Chance Books - Kelsey Rodkey ✭✭✭.5

Red Rising - Pierce Brown ✭✭✭✭

Where Darkness Blooms - Andrea Hannah ✭✭✭.5

Bittersweet in the Hollow - Kate Pearsall ✭✭✭✭.5

Dead Women Don't Tell Tales - Adrian J. Smith ✭✭✭.5

The Black Cat & the Vampire Vol 1 - Nikke Taino ✭✭✭✭

Mortal Follies - Alexis Hall ✭✭✭✭

The Hundred Years' War on Palestine - Rashid Khalidi ✭✭✭✭✭

The Black Cat & the Vampire Vol 2 - Nikke Taino ✭✭✭✭

These Violent Delights - Chloe Gong ✭✭✭✭✭

The Brothers Hawthorne - Jennifer Lynn Barnes ✭✭✭✭

Squire - Nadia Shammas ✭✭✭✭

The Companion - E.E. Ottoman ✭✭✭✭

Unfamiliar - Haley Newsome ✭✭✭✭

Something More - Jackie Khalilieh ✭✭✭.5

Turtle Bread - Kim-Joy ✭✭✭✭

Our Violent Ends - Chloe Gong ✭✭✭✭✭

Lore Olympus Vol 1 - Rachel Smythe ✭✭✭✭

Lore Olympus Vol 2 - Rachel Smythe ✭✭✭✭

Minor Detail - Adania Shibli ✭✭✭✭✭

Unfamiliar 2 - Haley Newsome ✭✭✭✭

Lore Olympus Vol 3 - Rachel Smythe ✭✭✭✭

Freedom Is a Constant Struggle: Ferguson, Palestine, and the Foundations of a Movement - Angela Y. Davis ✭✭✭✭✭

Lore Olympus Vol 4 - Rachel Smythe ✭✭✭✭

Us - Sara Soler ✭✭✭✭.5

(titles in italics were ARCs!)

[queer-reader-07]

ooo fun! thanks for the tag <3

i could talk about chemistry for the rest of my life and not get tired of it and it will only get more intense the further my studies go. i love chemistry there is so much cool fun facts and tidbits and weird things and fun math things and omg i love it.

dune. dune the novel, dune (1984), dune (2021/24). literally all of it. that story is one of the biggest most intense special interests of mine i love it so much and i could talk endlessly about it.

mason deaver novels. mostly The Feeling of Falling in Love but really any of them. those books genuinely changed the course of my life and have impacted me so profoundly it's kind of wild.

good omens, obviously. like, need i elaborate?

this one's niche, but gender as performance and specifically how makeup plays into that. i've got too many thoughts and not enough chances to bring it up.

no pressure tags: @bowtiepastabitch @indigovigilance @adverbian

List 5 topics you can talk on for an hour without preparing any material.

tagged by @aaronontherun!! thank u !! <3 made a new post bc. Long thread

tony stark. comic tony stark too to an extent but specifically mcu tony stark i will literally never shut up about him

sociology. sociology sociology sociology very broad i know but like the sociology of anything. give me any topic and i will link it to sociology somehow i will talk about the sociology of everything. religion power medicine healthcare politics deviance communism literally ANYTHINGGG i'm a yapper

my good omens fic lmao i put so much foreshadowing and so many hidden meanings in there that only i know probably so i could spend hours just dissecting them all

taylor swift. i would recite the lyrics to her whole discography for 10 hours straight if given the opportunity

i'm a hater so anything that makes me mad i can complain about forever

no pressure tags: @seven-stars-in-his-palm @crowleybrekkers @eybefioro @sentientsky @queer-reader-07

[idmnbc]

“I wish you all the best, Benjamin De Backer.” They aren’t the same words, but I know exactly what he means. “I love you too.”

I Wish You All the Best - Mason Deaver

[scriptlgbt]

Question: Gay + Ace GNC teenager

Hi! I'm writing a story were the main character is gay and asexual teenager in the modern day US. I was wondering if you could give me some pointers about his romantic and sexual orientations to help me write them without being offensive. It would also be helpful if you could give me advice about him wearing woman's clothes and makeup for pure comfort and enjoyment. Last piece of advice I'm going to ask for is how to write aphobia and homophobia (if that's okay with you) in a realistic way without being offensive or insensitive way. Thank you :) (I hope this wasn't to much to ask for).

Answer

This is extremely broad and hard to advise specifically for because of that, unfortunately. With regards to writing a gay ace character, what sorts of issues are you thinking may come up? Anything specific you need the blanks filled in for? (I know our ask is closed, but since this wasn't anon, I hope it's okay to ask you to reblog or reply to elaborate?)

Gender Presentation

With regards to wearing "women's" clothing, I think this sort of thing is something you could totally just write as being normal. Something that mentions what he is wearing without over-writing the things you don't necessarily know. If you feel the need to add in dialogue about it, it could always be something that makes it clear that this is just what he finds comfortable, and that everyone has their own unique relationship to clothes and gender expression.

Writing Instances of Bigotry

With aphobia and homophobia, you need to make it clear to any audience members who experience these things that you are on their side. This means, if possible, giving them the ability to brace for impact if needed. I Wish You All The Best by Mason Deaver did an AMAZING job with this. The opening scene is in situ after a specific traumatizing event happens, where the main character is calling an estranged sister for help. The impact of what happened is described prior to the actual event, which is still described early on, but not first thing. Giving audience the space and care, a narrative that acknowledges they may share the pain of the characters, means a lot.

I don't know enough about your specific plot, character, or setting, or what specific instances of aphobia and homophobia you were thinking to depict. Some will have more specific advice, and there are some things I think only people who have gone through it should write. But if we're talking about smaller instances, or something that happens in passing and is not recurring throughout the story, this is the advice I have. I'm sorry I cannot give anything more specific, but I hope it helps some.

mod nat

[maddiesbookshelves]

30 for the book ask! <3

Thanks for the ask! As for book recs, I have so many, it really depends on what you want to read but I'll try to keep it short and diverse:

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver, adorable queer love story and probably my favorite romance book (and I don't say that lightly, I'm very picky about romance)

Le Pacte des Marchombres by Pierre Bottero if you're in the mood for a fantasy trilogy (and since you speak French)

We Were Liars by E. Lockhart if you want a short, contemporary YA mystery with an unreliable narrator

Girl, Woman, Other by Bernardine Evaristo if you want to know more about what it's like being a black (queer) woman/person in the UK

The Finishing School series by Gail Carriger is a great YA series set in a steampunk Victorian society with supernatural creatures and lady-spies in training

And I'll stop myself there before the list gets out of hand but if you're ever in need of more recs just hit me up, I have many things to recommend.

[uncanny-tranny]

im curious to know if you can help,,, im writing a story with a gay couple ('one is cis and the other is nonbinary). i know people want to see more AMAB rep but i don't know how to get that across without being harmful somehow. i know revealing AGAB isn't a good thing to do in real life but i would just like to give people the rep they want T_T im nonbinary so i thought this would be easier but it's not. any advice? if so, thank you, and if not that's ok, have a lovely day!

This actually reminds me of the book I Wish You All the Best (Mason Deaver), so I'll talk about what made the book work in my opinion considering the nonbinary main character.

As I remember, Ben (the main character) is a nonbinary high schooler who was AMAB. I was very happy that Ben was (mostly) respected by those they are close to. Without getting much into spoiler territory because I recommend this book, Ben's internal struggle with dysphoria was also highlighted, as well as the person they wanted to be in the future. Though it's known what their ASAB was, it doesn't really interfere with the audience recognizing that this person doesn't align with that.

I think there's a lot to consider when you want to portray a character. In this case, are there ways of portraying gender dysphoria or gender euphoria (does the character experience one, both, or neither, or a mixture, for example)? Is there a point that this character comes put, or is it known that they're nonbinary? Is there a point of contention between them and the love interest where their gender or sex assigned would reasonably come up? Does their gender identity influence how they feel about relationships or love?

I know these are a lot of questions, but they're just examples of ways I think you could potentially explore your character and who they are. I think representation is great, just be sure to remember that not only are nonbinary people not a monolith, but that there are different experiences for everybody. Look into nonbinary communities with explicit inclusion of those who were AMAB, as well. Perhaps you could watch a nonbinary person's YouTube channel, or maybe read a nonbinary person's web article or a book or essay.

[nothinglessthanseven]

🌈 Pride-Inspired Scavenger Hunt

Thanks for tagging me @thereadingchallengechallenge

🍑Love: A Book that you absolutely, unconditionally love.

The House in the Cerulean Sea by T.J. Klune, so much pure queer joy, plus found family and magic what else could you want. (mlm)

🍑 Relationships: Give us a book with your favorite queer relationship! If it's queer it goes here. Do I need to specify that platonic and all others involved qualify or--

Yadriel and Julian from Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas, just the banter and the care, it's beautiful. (trans mc, mlm).

🍑 Color: Show us a book that is bright and colorful!

Just the entire Osemanverse, colourful inside and out!

🍑Letters: Pick out a book that starts with any of the following letters; L, G, B, T, Q, I, A

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver, will always hold a special spot in my heart for being the first story with a non-binary main character I read after coming out. (nb mc, nblm).

🍑Representation: For the last book, show us a book with representation that you enjoy. Show us what YOU want to see more of!

Mooncakes by Suzanne Walker, super gay graphic novel with a love story between a witch and a werewolf, yes please! Awesome non-binary and lesbian rep, plus childhood friends to lovers! (nb mc, mblw).

I an tagging @feathered-serpents @mothjons @stephs-bookshelf @thesexyllama @fox-guardian @martinbelovedblackwood @sadlittleme

[lgbtqreads]

Hiya! I'm pretty sure you've answered this ask before but I can't find it anymore, so I'm sorry for asking you again but do you have any recs of books that dont look queer from the outside or from the description on the back of the book? Preferably mlm or trans related! Thank you so much!!

Yep, have a whole feature for it! https://lgbtqreads.com/category/under-the-gaydar/ (This post is strictly focused on mlm, though the last book on the list is m/f - https://lgbtqreads.com/2018/03/14/under-the-gaydar-hide-and-gay-seek/)

For trans and nonbinary rep, check out Even if We Break and the upcomign At the End of Everything by Marieke Nijkamp, The Mermaid, the Witch, and the Sea by Maggie Tokuda-Hall, and I think you can probably get away with The Ghosts We Keep by Mason Deaver. Anthologies are also really good for hidden rep - That Way Madness Lies has several stories with trans and/or nonbinary narrators.

[thomaslightwood]

(click for better quality)

I was inspired to do this post by this one. I love such games and decided to do one myself! Here are 40 LGBTQ+ books, most of them not so popular - I wanted to add ones that usually are not in the spotlight. I hope you find something new to read!

I want to thank to the quicksilver gang and specifically to @linqyao @lord-alfred-douglass @morgnstern @bridgestocksariadne @ghostlivvy for recommending books and for the support ♥️

Under the line are all the books and links to Goodreads for them.

Enjoy!

Fantasy

Bonds of Brass by Emily Skrutskie

A Boy Worth Knowing by Jennifer Cosgrove

Long exposure by Marc

The Extraordinaries by TJ Klune

Cinderella is dead by Kalynn Bayron

A Study in Honor by Claire O'Dell

The Half Bad Trilogy by Sally Green

Green Creek series by Tj Klune

Captive Prince by C.S. Pacat

Girls of Paper and Fire Series by Natasha Ngan

The Fascinators by Andrew Eliopulos

The Binding by Bridget Collins

This Is How You Lose The Time War by Amal El-Mohtar

Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir

Historical

Me: Elton John Official Autobiography

Mercury And Me by Jim Hutton

The seven husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid 

Maurice by E. M. Forster

And I Darken by Kiersten White

The Persian Boy by Mary Renault

Call me by your name by André Aciman 

Aristotle and Dante discover the secrets of the universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz 

Like a Love Story by Abdi Nazemian

Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides 

Contemporary

rock by Anyta Sunday

More Happy Than Not by Adam Silvera

A Mark on my soul by Jordon Greene

Date me, Bryson Keller by Kevin van Whye

Heartstopper series by Alice Oseman

The Rest Of Us Just Live Here by Patrick Ness

Odd One Out by Nic Stone

The Gravity Of Us by Phil Stamper

I Wish You All The Best by Mason Deaver

Highly Illogical Behavior by John Corey Whaley

I Have Lost My Way by Gayle Forman

Loveless by Alice Oseman

The Five Stages Of Andrew Brawley by Shaun David Hutchinson

Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender

Running With Lions by Julian Winters

The Music Of What Happens by Bill Konigsberg

[la-galaxie-langblr]

22 Books I Want To Read In 2022

Thanks @upside-down-uni and @medustudies! In no particular order:

Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender

I Wish You All The Best by Mason Deaver

Persuasion

Northanger Abbey (both by Jane Austen)

Call Down The Hawk

Mr Impossible (both by Maggie Stiefvater)

Linguistics for Dummies

The Uni-Verse by Jack Edwards

I'll Be The One by Lyla Lee

You Have A Match by Emma Lord

A Pho Love Story by Loan Le

The Girls I've Been by Tess Sharpe

I Kissed Shara Wheeler by Casey McQuiston

Cinderella is Dead

This Poison Heart (both by Kalynn Bayron)

The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo

The House of Gucci by Sara Gay Forden

All Boys Aren't Blue by George M. Johnson

Detransition, Baby by Torrey Peters

The Twelfth Day of July by Joan Lingard

The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson

I tag whoever wants to do it :)

[kaimelia]

idk if you feel comfortable talking about this it’s totally ok if no, but I was wondering if I could ask about how you came to terms with/figured out your non-binary identity? I am struggling with this so I was wondering what it was like for you? Anyway I love your blog and I used to read your fics like every day this summer it kept me from going insane so thanks so much for everything you do 💕

hey anon!

im sorry it took me a while to answer this....I have the worst time collecting my thoughts in written material and have been wondering how exactly to answer this...but i'll just give it a shot!

in January of 2021, I was talking in a group chat with some online friends about some feelings I had about my gender. how often I just wish I had been born a guy so I could present in a neutral way, how I would have a flat chest, how I could do feminine things but in the way a man does feminine things, and so many other thoughts and feelings I had about my body, appearance and gender. I was told these thoughts are not common amongst all people born women and it threw me for a loop. I'd always thought I was comfortable with my gender identity, and suddenly realizing I wasn't was a bit shocking.

it was really hard at first because I didn't have anyone to talk to, or at least anyone I felt was accessible. I started interacting with blogs that allow people to send asks about different gender/related things and other community members respond and it really did help. it allowed me to share things anonymously and receive responses from tons of people, because no two people have the same experience!

I had always thought that being trans was the story you always hear...wearing princess dresses as a young "boy" or that general idea of just always knowing that you didn't identify with the sex assigned to you. but, it's really not.

I first came out online and that allowed me to experiment with pronouns in a generally accepting space. and then, in august, I came to college and saw it as my best chance at a new start. ive since come out to most people in my life, but things haven't gone the best and I wish I could tell you that I feel totally comfortable in my identity.

the best advice I can give you is talk to people! my dms and ask box are always open, and there are many other accounts in the grey's fandom, as well as Tumblr blogs specifically designated as spaces for people questioning their gender identity (I can recommend some if you'd like!)

figuring this out can be super confusing, anon. and I want you to know that you are never alone in what you're feeling. it's okay to be unsure and it's okay to have every feeling about everything. I promise you, ive been there!

side note: e r fightmaster in this podcast....everything they say about gender and everything! Binary

also adding on...I read a ton of books that help me feel less alone in feelings and gain other perspectives! here are some of my favs with nb/trans main characters!

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver

Between Perfect & Real by Ray Stoeve (I cried. This was personal)

Love & Other Disasters by Anita Kelly

[ireadyabooks]

Books To Be Thankful For

‘Tis the season to be grateful and give thanks! We’re thankful for books all year round, but since it’s Thanksgiving time, we wanted to take a moment to call out a few books that have meant a lot to us lately. ❤️

STEPSISTER by Jennifer Donnelly

It’s about time that the “ugly” stepsisters from Cinderella had their story told! In this retelling of the classic fairytale, stepsisters Isabelle and Tavi deal with the fallout after Cinderella leaves for the palace - and go on a journey of redemption and empowerment. We can all take some inspiration out of this story and learn that there’s truly nothing more beautiful than courage.

CALL DOWN THE HAWK by Maggie Stiefvater

Anyone who has read The Raven Cycle has a LOT to be thankful for this holiday season now that Ronan Lynch’s story has continued in the first book of The Dreamer Trilogy! Luckily for everyone, this story has plenty to offer for non-Raven Cycle fans, too - from fantastical dream-creatures to art forgers to the end of the world. Reading Call Down the Hawk will prove to you that anything is possible!

I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST by Mason Deaver 

This year, we’re thankful to have read this incredible debut from Mason Deaver about a non-binary teen coming out to their parents and finding love, acceptance, and friendship. If you haven’t read this book yet, move it to the top of your TBR pile, because I Wish You All the Best is the perfect book to remind us that while we all have our own struggles, what matters most is being true to yourself. 

SHADOWSCENT by P.M. Freestone

Sometimes you need a fantasy to really envelop all of your senses. In Shadowscent, P.M. Freestone has created a stunning world where magic is linked to fragrance. We’re thankful to have spent time in the Aramtesh Empire on an epic quest and to have been brought in so fully to this world! 

TARNISHED ARE THE STARS by Rosiee Thor

Tarnished are the Stars is the sci-fi fantasy adventure that we’re thankful to have read this year! Anna, who has a clockwork heart and supplies black market medical tech, is such an inspiration as she fights to save her people from an epidemic of heart defects. If you’ve wanted to see queer representation in fantasy, this is absolutely the book for you.

[nerdygaymormon]

Hi! I love your blog and it's so helpful to me. I was wondering: do you have any recommendations for ya queer and mormon books? Thanks for doing all that you do!!

Thanks for the compliment!

Queer YA novels seem to have come into their own just in the past few years. 

Queer Mormon YA novels are fairly scarce, but I have one that I love--

Autoboyography by Christina Lauren. A bisexual teen from San Francisco moves to Provo, starts high school, falls in love with a Mormon and learns a lot about the LDS Church. The authors do a beautiful job of explaining the Church and why being a queer member is such a quandary. I give it my highest recommendation.

I have another Queer Mormon YA novel sitting on my nightstand. The title cracks me up but also makes me suspicious it will be cheesy and so am not recommending it until I have a chance to read it. Nephi’s Courage: Story of a Bad Mormon by Rory McFarlan.

Mama’s Boy: A Story from Our Americas by Dustin Lance Black is not YA fiction, but it’s a good read. Dustin Lance Black's journey is interesting. His life went from not much hope to becoming a part of Hollywood. He was closeted and worried he would lose everything if he came out, and now is a gay-rights activist. His journey as a Mormon who realizes he is gay and the conflict it causes, the devastating words he hears at church, all hit close to home for me. His church at first informed how he viewed himself and his orientation, but in time his orientation changed how he viewed his church.

—————————

I have some Queer YA novels for you to check out.

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz. They’re both Mexican-American teens so we also get that identity. The book is from Ari’s perspective, we read his thoughts, and it’s interesting to understand things that he isn’t picking up on. It’s a very sweet book.

Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli. This was turned into the movie Love, Simon. I adored the movie and I love the book. Simon navigates coming out, high school life, a secret admirer and a bully. Told in a way that feels like a real look into a gay teen’s life.

Check, Please! by Ngozi Ukazu. This started as a Tumblr comic, you can find read it for free here, or you can get the books. There’s some language as this is set in a hockey program at a college. Eric Bittle is a closeted gay guy who is very sweet and doesn’t seem cut out to be part of the hockey team, but he learns & grows and in the process wins over our hearts and those of his teammates.

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver. I couldn’t put this book down. It starts off with Benjamin coming out to their parents as non-binary and being kicked out. Benji has an older sister but hasn’t seen them for 10 years, but calls her for help. It’s the final semester of their senior year and Benji is starting in a new school. In addition to the usual school stuff, there’s worrying about do they come out to the person they have a crush on, and explaining to others what it's like to figure out you're non-binary. Their sister asked if Benji is gay, which is a complex question for someone who is non-binary.The author did excellent job portraying anxiety and depression. I'm glad this book has them attend therapy sessions, such a good portrayal of that process.   

Torn: Rescuing the Gospel from the Gays-vs.-Christians Debate by Justin Lee. This is not a YA novel, but a man who describes his experience growing up gay in a conservative Christian household. I think it’s written for a straight audience, it’s very accessible. I found myself nodding over and over, yep, that happened to me, or yes I eventually came to the same realization. 

The Pants Project by Cat Clarke is about a transgender student who isn’t yet out fighting their middle school’s dress code which states that girls must wear skirts and boys pants. It’s aimed at a middle-school audience, think 9-13 years old.

Hazel's Theory of Evolution by Lisa Jenn. Hazel has two moms and one of her friends is trans. And while the words aren’t used within the story, Hazel is portrayed as ace/aro. The final 50 pages of the book packs a punch, and teaches the lesson that it's okay not to want a romantic relationship or a sexual relationship, that all the heteronormative milestones and relationship expectations aren't actually requirements and it's okay to want something else, or only parts of them.

Girl Mans Up by M-E Girard. Pen's not a girly-girl, she's not a tomboy, she wants to be one of the guys but she doesn't want to become a guy. This story explores gender identity through the life of a young Canadian butch lesbian. She’s rough, uses swears, does marijuana, all part of being one of the tough guys.

Happy Reading!

[carryonsimoncarryonbaz]

Hi, I'm sorry to bother. I just finished the two books: Carry on and Wayward Son. I am totally in love. I would like to thank you for that. You inspired me to read them❤😘 Anyway, my question is if you know any other book, of Rainbow Rowell or another writer, which is just as interesting. I prefer books with main gay characters. Thank you. XO❤

I’m ecstatic that you let me know!! I can’t tell you how happy that makes me! I am THRILLED that my blog inspired you to read those books and that you enjoyed them so. They are brilliant. Life changing. A source of joy and comfort and thought provoking insights.

If you liked Carry On and Wayward Son you may like Fangirl, which is where Baz and Simon make their first, indirect appearance. It is the book that brought me to Rainbow Rowell and ultimately led me to Carry On. I am a fan of all of Rainbow Rowell’s books—you can’t go wrong with any of them in my opinion.

As far as books with LGBQT+ protagonists: I can give you a list!

Alex In Wonderland by Simon James Green. This is a laugh out loud book about a boy’s summer job and the new friends he meets working at a run-down amusement arcade. 

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Saenz. Two boys meet by chance at a pool over the summer and forge a friendship that bonds them, gives them a glimpse at greater truths and changes both of their lives. 

Red, White and Royal Blue by Casey McQusiton. What happens when the First Son of the United States and the Prince of England are forced into a sham friendship as media damage control? They end up learning more about themselves, each other, falling in love, and what it means to fight for what you truly want.  

The Binding by Bridget Collins. A lush study of enchantment, the magic of books, memory and forbidden love. 

Simon vs. the Homo sapiens Agenda by Becky Albertalli. Not so openly gay Simon has a letter fall into the wrong hands and starts a clandestine email correspondence with someone who seems to understand him better than the people closest to him. 

Leah on the Off-Beat by Becky Albertalli. Set in the same universe as Simon vs. the Homo sapiens Agenda this book follows the story of Leah, Simon’s friend, and her tumultuous senior year of high school.

The Music of What Happens by Ben Koningsberg. Max and Jordan spend a summer working together in a food truck. It’s hot, it’s summer, business is not so good and there is definitely an undeniable attraction between them. 

What If It’s Us? by Becky Albertalli and Adam Silvera. A chance run-in brings Arthur and Ben together but is the universe conspiring to help them or hinder them? 

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver. Ben comes out as non-binary to their family and their world is turned upside down when their family not only proves unaccepting but kicks them out of their home. Ben’s estranged sister provides a safe haven and Ben adjust to a new school and new friends, including Nathan Allan–who becomes a friend, a confidante and perhaps something more.

The Last True Poets of the Sea by Julia Drake. Violet and Sam have a famous relative who was the only survivor of a shipwreck off the Maine shore. FIdelia swam to shore, married and started a family and founded the town of Lyric. Violet and Sam may have shipwrecks in their own lives but so far they haven’t been the best at navigating them. Shipped off to the town of Lyric for the summer Violet makes new friends, new realizations, and new discoveries about famlly, the nature of friendship, siblings, and Fidelia’s true history. 

The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee. A Grand Tour of Europe turns out to be far from what Monty expected, when he, his sister Felicity, and his best friend Percy get involved in more than they bargained for on their European adventure. A quest for indolent pleasure leads to a manhunt, subterfuge, injury and generalized mayhem, as Monty learns more about himself and his true feelings for the boy he calls his best friend. 

Swordspoint by Ellen Kushner. Men live and die by the sword in Riverside but Richard St. Vier is no ordinary swordsman. And Alec, the poor student he encounters in a pub in the shady part of town, is anything but what he appears. Richard finds the line between hero and villain can change in the blink of an eye. 

Weak Heart by Ban Gilmartin (our very own @basic-banshee). Things aren’t quite as they seem on the Isle of Mab. Thomas Madigan is living in a nightmare–reality and the visions that come to him blurring further and further each day. his best friend/ former friend Kit Macrae is missing and selkie Isla has made her way to land in an effort to find him. Mystery, magic, and the sea with characters who grab onto your hear and linger in your head long after you finish the book. 

Ship It by Brita Lundin. Claire is a sixteen year old obsessed with Demon Heart. She gets the chance of lifetime when she meets her idols at a Comic-con but things don’t turn out as well as she expected. An unexpected road-trip, a new friend, insights into the reality of fandom and shipping, and a realization that she may have found something more than planned in her friendship with her new friend Tess. 

Heartstopper by Alice Oseman. Charlie and Nick go to the same school but had never met until they end up sitting together in class. Charlie is falling hard for Nick and Nick surprises Charlie and himself. A study of friendship, loyalty, mental health, and love. 

I Was Born for This by Alice Oseman. A book about the band The Ark and their fandom, in particular die-hard fan Angel Rahimiand, a most avid follower of the band. The Ark fandom has given her so much–friendships, dreams, her place in the world. When Angel finds herself face to face with her idols she learns reality is often far different than the slick images portrayed in the media and her loyalty to the Ark is tested and strengthened by their interactions. 

The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. A unique and utterly heart-wrenching, lyrical retelling of the story of Achilles and Patroclus. The Iliad comes to life–with the action of the Trojan War, an epic love story, and the private moments of two of mythology’s most charismatic and intriguing characters.