#thanks for being civil in your criticisms anon!

[jayjay-thejet-plane]

Heyy I'm the "why are all the good supernatural artists terrible people" guy. My point was, your art is genuinely amazing and I love how you draw characters and use colors ect ect, excepttt the fact you like incest. like actually what the fuck it's like a punch to the gut

What a lovely compliment fr, thank you!

I like sam and dean’s relationship specifically… its not like i like irl incest🤨

I was a bit of an anti once… and then neutral, but ive realized its all a bit silly

Do you truly believe every person who has ever made a film, written a book, or made art that includes illegal stuff (murder, incest, noncon, torture, cannibalism, underage, blackmail, physical assault, robbery, cheating etc. (the list goes on)) is a terrible person?🤔

People portray fictional characters doing sketchy shit all the time, we generally dont assume they think its chill to do irl… nor do we think they are bad people for liking to make horror movies for example

I promise you that horror film makers genuinely enjoy making fucked up gory shit, so why cant i enjoy drawing some fictional brothers making out? Do you think incest is worse than torture and murder🤨 i personally would rather some siblings fuck each other irl than people get tortured irl but maybe thats just me

Obviously you dont have to like my wincest art, if it gives you the ick thats totally fair! I get the ick from plenty of things myself. But maybe dont base your judgement of others/morals on your ick response…

Live and let live💙

[gffa]

Honestly, I felt touched by your answer to the other anon. It must be very tiresome to deal with shit like that for so long.

People are rage baiting, throwing ready-made arguments abt everything. From serious topics like politics to fans enjoying a movie. Respectful discussion doesn't exist.

I've seen an answer inside a thread that I think apllies: if someone says rude things online to a damn stranger, said stranger has no obligation of being polite back or to try to understand. People need to rethink how they interact online. And, in some cases, there's no solution, jerks will be jerks.

Sorry you have to deal with that. Be good out there.

Hi! Thank you for the very sweet message, I appreciate it. And goddddd I have so many things to say about the state of respectful discussion (and the lack of it) in Star Wars fandom, because I don't think I've met a fandom where it's so complicated to even just understand the boundaries of a given discussion. Like, okay, let's say I'm going to have a conversation with someone who is Jedi-critical and we want it to be a respectful discussion--what does that look like? Because I've had discussions that I thought were very civil and fruitful, but then later almost every time I would see the person comment something like "Jedi fans are so blind they can't admit the truth." on someone else's post, often about a subject that we'd discussed. So, what initially felt like a respectful discussion then becomes completely soured and another source of contention in the fandom imo. And then there's the consideration of, what constitutes respectful discussion to both parties--if I completely disagree with everything you say and state my views with confidence (frex "Attachment is not the same thing as love, because the Jedi are primarily influenced by Buddhists on this aspect and both word of god commentary and the canon source material itself are extremely consistent on this."), does the other person consider that disrespectful to them if they disagree? I don't consider it inherently disrespectful, so long as we're talking about the content of the canon and not about other real people, because, babe, you can just not agree. I'm not doing anything to stop you. But I've found a lot of people think I'm trying to force them to agree with me when, no, I'm just stating things on my own blog as things I view as facts. People are free to disagree with me, just as I disagree with them, but a lot of people often seem to think differently as far as I can tell. I've seen so many discussions where people are like, "Finally! A respectful discussion in Star Wars!" and it's like. 90% of them just agreeing with each other. Like, yeah, it's easy to have a "respectful discussion" when you largely overlap opinions. But would they be that considerate if the person didn't largely agree with them? Would they still consider it respectful if the other person maintained their disagreement? And then there's the thorny, "What do we even consider 'canon'?" because, for me, I'm not really that into the Legends continuity for example. It's a very cool continuity, there's so much there that I love, but my heart is with Lucas' continuity. Some people really don't accept anything from the Disney continuity. All of that is fine, but to have a discussion, you have to figure out if you're using supplementary material and where each of you is coming from. And if you mix-and-match, that's another thing you have to address, because not everyone does.

And this is all over some fictional made up stories! Politics is easy to see why it gets so contentious--real people's lives are really on the line, anyone who can calmly discuss life and death situations for a lot of people like they don't matter is someone I'm going to have a hard time understanding. But over Star Wars? Having to overcome all of the above and pour a ton of energy into being compassionate when you've been burned so many times, all because of a fictional space story?? A lot of times it just doesn't seem worth it when there are better uses for our time and it's not like anyone's life is on the line here. (Like writing up a reference guide or silly Jedi Temple Life headcanons! So much more productive feeling!) So when someone comes into my inbox with bad faith commentary, I can only set down my boundaries and refuse to dance with them on the subject they're trying to needle me with. If they want a real discussion, they can pull up their big person's undies and approach me with good faith. Ultimately, I'm more interested in talking about how we treat each other and thinking that maybe that can provide some progress, rather than arguing about the same things we've done forever, because people are going to settle where they will, so many of us just aren't moving because we've done the homework, spent our time in the mines, and come to the conclusions we have after a lot of thought about it. Discussions where you're trying to move someone who doesn't want to be moved don't feel fruitful to me, I need a different purpose to engage and I'm doing my best to convey that that's where my boundary is, to people who come into my inbox. Genuinely good faith discussions are welcome, but you're going to have to pour a lot of compassion into it, because I'm going to be pouring a lot of compassion into a good faith discussion, too, otherwise I don't see it going anywhere. And people who try are going to get the same response they always get. I'll try to be gentle as I can about it, but seriously. Eight years of this. Extend me some grace, you guys, okay? 😂

[velvetvexations]

This is how I rationalize FHJY.

If a trans man or intersex person pings both the trans and feminine flags to a transphobe they can very well expirience transmisogny while not being transfem. I genuinely think TMA would be effective and important if it were unifying people who expirience severe transmisogny regardless of gender or sex or identity! And in that case we probably wouldn't even need TME! If we are just talking about specific people who share this expirience of oppression then there is no need to define an out-group, the very definition implies one, and the lack of an outgroup term fixes the issue with intersexism by not creating an unneeded binary! But as it stands it legit just means "amab transfem" and thus there us NO reason you can't just say "transfem" like? What is the point if this term? Why do we need a word that seems to cover a broad spectrum of people if it legit only means transfems? We can still say "transmisogny primarily targets transfems" without TMA, and we can just say transmacs and cis people if we're talking about people who aren't transfem without TME. If a word for what you are or your expirience or your community as a whole doesn't exist, like monosexism or transandrophobia or allosexual/romantic, then yes we need new terminology, but if you are just adding another term that means the exact same thing and is even MORE exclusive, harms intersex people, and is clearly being used as a bludgeoning tool to hurt other trans people...then I don't see the point at all.

Being used as a bludgeoning tool IS the point.

Thank you, anon. <3 It wasn't good for either of us.

A lotta people still really cling to the idea that misogyny is the root of all evils an it's weird to see that happening in the trans community but I guess it ain't surprising cuz everyone here experiences misogyny in some form or another... Tho I guess that idea spooks some people too, shooting back with "you can't call that misogyny you're just misgendering yourself" when guys like me say we still experience misogyny, but w/e. Transphobes misgendered me first it's not some fucked up internalized transphobia to say they think I'm a silly girl who wants to escape my station. An even if I were misgendering myself, that's fine actually. I can misgender myself if I wanna. It's nobody else's place to say whether I can or can't misgender myself while addressing my interpretation of the bigotry I'm faced with. It's weird that that's even a criticism to begin with tbh methinks somebody's projecting their dysphoria onto others.

I do genuinely want to see civil war between the extremely online leftists who think all transphobia is misogyny and all transphobia is racism.

[olderthannetfic]

To the NLOG anon:

I had written a long piece but lost it, so the gist of it is that bullies are social chameleons. They will always try to find a way to get away with bullying while claiming to be the victims. And many of the "bad" NLOGs were girls looking for ways to recreate the status quo with them at the top instead.

I think that NLOGs were a natural result of the post 9/11 conservative paranoia of "anyone who is not a good American™ is a Satanic Menace to Society" (where good American meant white, christian, affluent, thin, conventionally attractive, straight...and everybody else, from foreigners, fat people, anyone gender non conforming or even alternative people were "planning the downfall of civilization"). In that climate, harassment towards "the weird" was not only tolerated but encouraged as the moral thing to do.

And the thing is, if you are ostracized from society but discouraged to learn about feminism and such, then it's no wonder that your only way of defending yourself is by using the same attacks used against you!

The big change here I think came with the recession where suddenly society became fascinated with the weird, and being a hipster or a nerdy girl was "acceptable" (hence the "golden years" of Tumblr). Many of the bullies who had gained notoriety thanks to their privilege suddenly realised they couldn't get away with it as talk about discrimination and feminism was becoming more commonplace, and so many people adopted NLOG looks and attitudes to keep doing society approved bullying.

Nowadays tho you don't see many NLOGs because, like you said, we either know better now and have deconstructed ourselves or simply because in this era of "bring back bullying" most people don't need to hide behind underprivileged people to harass someone. If they want to hate on other women they can just become a tradwife/high value woman and go back to the conservative politics of the 2000s or they can pick a bit of #girlbossfeminism while going back to their hyper feminine roots to claim *throws dice* that you have to like pink or you have internalised misogyny and that you should just try to fit into the mold, for your own good, you know.

So yeah, those who want to oppress will find a way to do so under any costume, while being the loudest and sidelining the rest of us. There's nothing to do about it, unfortunately :(

--

I mean... sure...

But the actual phrase "not like the other girls" rose to prominence to point out how fucking obnoxious a class of book is for its heroine who is always like "I don't want to stay home and do needlework!" and then the book is set in some era when rich ladies are supposed to be running an entire manor house or something, not just embroider, and the author has blatantly missed all of that. Or it's some Anita Blake bullshit where the heroine hates literally every other woman, and especially all of them with blond hair because the author is insecure and bugfuck nuts.

It's a specific dumb trope in fiction and term in criticism of that dumb trope.

[katerinaaqu]

That's a bit sad and such a shame that you got blocked by people you used to interact with, I mean it's their rights, but at the same time, blocking because of different opinions instead of something big just seems petty. And they claims the Gods to be the very definition of petty.

Just know that I'm one of those people who appreciate your thoughts and analysis on Greek mythology, even your criticisms! So what if you have different opinions, it shows that you are a living breathing individual with own wants and expectations. Doesn't means we can't be civil with each other.

It is indeed especially people that I valued my time with before although to their defense I know I am not the most social person to deal with and I am opinionated. Of course even I would think blocking would be extreme but I definitely understand where they come from. For one or two came off as a surprise but for others not so much hehehe oh well what can you do such as life.

I guess they found my persistence on some opinions too annoying and they preferred not to see anything related from me. Quite honest I see why in many levels. I mean I wouldn't do that because even if I get hell annoyed by some other stuff I prefer to scroll past or remove them from my list rather than blocking but honestly I cannot complain. Am I sad? Yes. Can I complain? No. Not only it is their right to do so but I suppose I can also see where they come from so yeah life goes on. And it is better so than being rough all the time and all.

Thanks for the sweet words Anon. Really no issues here. I try to focus on the here and now and I am always getting super excited every time I see comments by people or reblogs around my stuff in the here and now. Do I feel sad to have lost some of them because of blocking? Yes. But I focus more on now.

[luciferanalyzestar]

Hi, exhausted helluva fan here, coming from the "mental asylum" ask.

Let me say, in all sincerity, I would love to be able to engage with some of the very valid and well put points you raise there. I think they point to some genuine issues that are worth discussing.

However, I find them difficult to swallow watching you almost entirely brush aside how absolutely unhinged and caustic the first part of that ask is. Especially when you continue the post by(very validly) pointing to similarly extreme behavior on the other side. Saying that about other human beings because of discourse over a fictional character is not a rational or healthy response, no matter how toxic or wrong that discourse is. That behavior deserves to be called out just as much as the examples you highlighted.

Honestly, I like the show. It's far from high art and has many issues that should be addressed, but I personally enjoy it despite the flaws. I would LOVE to have an actual space to critique the show in a nuanced and healthy way, but *both* sides of any discourse around this show have turned the entire subject into a black hole where civility and nuance go to die. And I wish BOTH sides would admit that they have played a part in making it that way.

I couldn't tell you what about your post in particular empowered me to write this. Ive seen so many similar ones. Maybe because, outside of the objections I already outlined, you seem pretty smart and reasonable to me. I just sincerely wish there were a space for civil conversations without every opinion on this show becoming so deeply moralized by either side.

The "mental asylums" comment is a weird thing to say. Maybe I should have said more or told the anon that saying something like that can be view as ableist.

I would LOVE to have an actual space to critique the show in a nuanced and healthy way.

I wish the wider fandom was more welcoming to criticism in general. Say something a little negative or saying that you do not like a certain thing, you are viewed as an "anti" even if the opinion is a reasonable one or you are calling out the misogynistic writing.

Critical communities exists because this is the only place where fans can share their problems with a show they care about. This is a comment I found on Sarcastic Chorus' recent video about him no longer wanting to talk about the Hellaverse.

This fandom really believes that criticism equals hate and cannot tell the difference between them. I hope I am critiquing the shows in a healthy way. I am never angry when making these posts, mainly just confuse, dumbfounded, and annoyed with it comes to the racism implications.

but *both* sides of any discourse around this show have turned the entire subject into a black hole where civility and nuance go to die. And I wish BOTH sides would admit that they have played a part in making it that way.

The hardcore antis and defensive stans are both sides of the same coin. You are right about the civility part. I rarely want to call people 'stupid' or 'dumb as fuck' for their opinion or view.

I do not make critical comments under fans post either. If I see a fan say that they like the latest episode and I do not like it, I just scroll past.

People who have "antivivziepop" or "ihatevivziepop" in their username have an unhealthy obsession with Viv and the Hellaverse like stans do.

I couldn't tell you what about your post in particular empowered me to write this. Ive seen so many similar ones. Maybe because, outside of the objections I already outlined, you seem pretty smart and reasonable to me. I just sincerely wish there were a space for civil conversations without every opinion on this show becoming so deeply moralized by either side.

Lmao not you calling me smart💀 but thank you. Being reasonable is also my main goal. I hope during the hiatus; more civil conversations (not a twitter, it is a lost cause) can be held without people throwing around 'media literacy' every five second.

[arionwind]

Knowing that you think about things critically and deeply, and that you analyze and scritinize things even when they jive with your preexisting values, your new blog title makes you 1.5x as hot* and I've never even seen so much as a picture of you (anon bc I'm shy but we're mutuals heeheehee...)

*EUR to USD conversion rates

First off, that last line is sending me, thank you for being witty, I wish you were off anon so I could tell you to your face how much that cracked me up.

Also hope you don't mind, but I am going to take a minute to unpack my thoughts here, then end with a pic just for you! (Face censored, much like our hero who is still at large, may the falsely accused Luigi be released soon.)

I hate that this shooting had to happen. But the thing is, given material conditions it did have to happen. Not in the sense that it was a moral imperative, but in the sense that a civil society that condemns people en masse to death for not being rich enough (and let's be honest here - you do have to be rich. You could have a six or seven figure annual income and still get wiped out by medical debt.) while also refusing to regulate firearms or provide even basic broad mental health support will eventually erupt into violence targeted at the people perpetuating that system. I'm not the only one who is only shocked this didn't happen sooner.

Moreover . . . it's happened. As a general rule I refuse to advocate for accelerationist actions because I can't accept the collateral damage that would result. As such I can't in good conscience advocate for more shootings (even if I need to stress that, without massive health care reform, there will be so many more now that the first domino has fallen). But I can't un-kill the guy either. And I have seen evidence of some people - however few - waking up from their right-wing echo chambers as a direct result of this.

It might be callous of me to want to capitalize on this event to push for greater class solidarity, but it's not nearly as callous as the system we are fighting. And at the risk of sounding petty and petulant, if the fucker couldn't be bothered to do one good thing with his life, then it's up to us to make something good from his death.

Anyway, thanks for reading, hot for anime-edited teacher now:

[burst-of-iridescent]

Hello! Zutarians like you are the reason why I am moving further away from Zutara. the way you talk rudely to people who disagree with you is really upsetting. The anon who wrote to you (or several anons) did not show rudeness and spoke quite politely, but you literally immediately started being rude, talking arrogantly and familiarly. the fact that someone does not agree with you does not mean that you need to talk rudely, arrogantly or point out mistakes in English to people (it may come as a shock to you, but a lot of young people do not have the opportunity to get a good education and do not have the opportunity to know English perfectly, especially if it is not their native language). thank you, you completely ruined zutara for me.

do you think it's polite to come into someone's inbox just to mock an edit they spent a lot of time and effort on, which they tagged appropriately for the express purpose of making sure no one who enjoyed kat.aang would see it? do you think it's polite to then follow up with an unasked-for essay in response, one that misappropriates the legitimate issues faced by women of colour to tear down a fictional ship? do you think it's polite to invalidate the racial identity of an actual woman of colour just because she doesn't agree with your opinions? do you think it's polite to keep anonymously bombarding strangers you don't know online with condescending, bad-faith arguments that don't take into account anything they're trying to say?

do you think that perhaps, just perhaps, after dealing with all of that for 24 hours straight, people might not feel inclined to be cheery and pleasant to the person responsible for it?

the fact that someone does not agree with you does not mean that you need to talk rudely, arrogantly or point out mistakes in English to people

i couldn't agree more. that is why i am perfectly willing to engage in polite, civil discussion with people who are actually arguing in good-faith, and who don't harass me online or associate with others who do.

i have no idea why you seem to think i criticized that anon's english by the way; if that is from my "pay attention in english class" remark, i was referring to media literacy skills (a fair point to make, considering that's exactly what they came into my asks about). not once did i ever remark on their grammar, spelling, or anything else about their english, nor do i feel the need to.

but if it's more important to you to blame and tone police me instead of the person who's been harassing me for the last two days, then please know that i'm not the one ruining zutara and zutara fandom for you.

you're doing that just fine on your own.

[blighted-lights]

I feel like your approach to criticizing a certain fandom was the wrong way of doing it. Don't get me wrong, you are a hundred percent right about the lack of representation for certain characters. But you had to have known that you would've gotten backlash for insinuating that the only reason that content is being made is because people are... misogynistic? The characters are well-written; that's why they get attention. The women are also well-written, you're right! But instead of getting mad at the people who enjoy specific characters, you could contribute to what you want to see in the fandom. Make fanfiction, make art, talk about your favorite ships, talk about your favorite characters, talk about the head-canons you have for them, connect with other fans of those characters, make AUs with them, make the fandom you want to see! But I don't know what you were expecting when you come out and say in the tags "you must be misogynists for liking these characters and you must be awful people for playing around with AUs" even though every fandom on this website does that. That was hostile and was only going to get a hostile response in return especially when you specifically put it in the tags for fans of those characters to see. Because it reads as you insinuating that fans of these characters existing is why you don't get any representation of your favorite characters. Or, alternatively, that everyone only likes certain characters because they're misogynists who hate women characters. People make content of them because they like them and because they want to make content of them.

Want more content of the things you want to see? Pay or support the artists and writers who make that content or start making it yourself. Its not helpful to complain that some characters get more attention than others but then make no attempt to contribute to it in any meaningful way. You cannot just get mad at people for liking characters and expect the fandom to magically decide its going to give you the content you want.

This is a long-winded way of saying you are correct in that the fandom seems to hyper-focus on some characters over others. But the way you approached that discussion was combative, hostile, and unhelpful, and you're not going to motivate a community into making content by being passive-aggressive to the people making the content they want to make. Be the change you want to see in the fandom, or support the artists and writers who make the content you want to see.

Its like... You can't complain your garden isn't growing if you're not watering it and not adding seeds, and instead are blaming everyone else for having plants in their gardens that you don't like.

anon i dont know how to tell you this but if you felt the need to write a five-paragraph essay talking about how i need to be nicer to other people when i am pointing out misogyny in a fandom space then, well... actually, i dont know what to tell you other than the fact that i was trying to be aggressive and im not going to be civil about misogyny. my post wasn't made in the hopes of getting people to make more content of the women in borderlands because that would never in ten fucking million years work. it was not a constructive post. you are assuming i have some sort of goodwill about this and i don't. i wanted to be an asshole because, surprise, i am an asshole. funny how that works.

you are also pulling so much of this out of nowhere and putting so many words in my mouth that i dont even know where to begin with it?? i mean this in the kindest way possible nonnie but. this is a wild response to make when all i said was essentially "wow it sure is weird that the majority of content made for bl is focused on only three men when there's a full cast of amazing women to look at" and then "its also weird that people are making aus to erase the canon abuse and exploitation of a CHILD in order to make jack a good father". but thanks for the essay, nonnie. i guess.

[arom-antix]

Another coward-anon.

I appreciate how much effort you put into trying to be civil if harsh, and explain the situation.

Reading one of your asks about their love for YOI, and 'non-academic' posts from other people in the fandom, considering these rants, it doesn't seem to be really about 'academic' discussion or 'love for YOI', but much more about the good ol' love for one's own headcanons and hatred for some *inconvenient* elements of canon/headcanons of other people.

https://imgur.com/a/cB0S3mm

https://imgur.com/a/R5KgpDC

It's not cowardice to not want your name and face publically attached to this. I'm the one who started this, you don't have to be more than a witness on the stand. Of course being anonymous does make it harder to verify the legitimacy of asks but that's up to each reader to decide. I'm going to treat every ask, unless it's completely outrageous, as genuine. I'm not making that call for everyone. I'm just going to give my honest take on what I see.

Anyway, thanks! It's been weighing on me an seemingly a lot of other people so I don't mind being the platform for people to speak their truth. Everything comes back to you eventually. Karma is only a bitch if you've been one. Samurai getting their comeuppance like this is just the dam breaking.

And I agree, I don't personally think it's much about academia and canon loyalty at all. Samurai might disagree but it does come across as being about getting her headcanons and interpretations accepted as the "most accurate" ones. That's at least how I feel when I read her posts. She pretends it's about the academia (dgmw I think she does like academia) and yet shuts down others with insults and accusations when they try to engage with the show from other angles, even if that approach is highly academic.

And yes, I know I keep bringing up the academia thing, but that's because it's one of the things that annoy me most. I have basically no patience for people who look down on others for simply not being highly intellectual and that patience is in the negatives when said people don't even live up to those standards themselves. Rules for thee, none for me. It's just arrogance. That might be cultural on my part, I find self flattery, boasting, arrogance, showing off, bragging, etc. indescribably insufferable. You're allowed to compliment yourself but you need to do it tastefully or I'll assume you don't actually possess any of the qualities you proclaim to have.

And in Samurai's case, she uses this self flattery to not just artificially inflate herself and lift her up, but also to push others down into the dirt. Being good isn't good enough. They need to be better. They need to be the best. And when you don't have what it takes, you have to lower the average.

When you consider your own words better than everyone else's, you shut down any real discussion. You're making your own echo chamber, no TikTok algorithm needed. As I've said before, it's okay to disagree, it's good to disagree, and it's great to engage in polite discussion with people you don't agree with. It challenges what you take for granted and makes you explore other lines of thought, even if only as a thought experiment. It makes you more empathetic. It makes you a better person.

And if you're wrong, that's okay too. There's absolutely nothing wrong with being wrong. You just have to accept it, take accountability for your behaviour, and move on and try to be better. You don't have to keep beating yourself up over and over and over again about a thing. You're allowed to not take criticism personally. And I know, the thoughts don't go away like that, it's not that easy, but I also know that that's a matter of practicing and finding ways to deal with it. Trust me, I went through that practice and am still doing it. It really does work if you're willing to genuinely try.

But you not being good at shutting the thoughts down is still not an excuse for poor behaviour. Maybe you can't control your thoughts, but you can control your actions or at the very least fix what you broke if you lost control. Regardless of your situation or mental state, you still did what you did, and you have to accept accountability and criticism for it. For example, if you know you can't control yourself when drunk and do horrible things, people shouldn't just forgive you because you can't control it. It's on you to not get drunk if you know this is the consequence.

Oh and get a therapist, Samurai. You might already have one, but you're clearly not talking about the right things with them.

Thank you for the ask, anon.

Edit to add: I realised some might not want to bother with opening the image links anon provided so here are the images they link to:

I'm not going to go into analysing these posts here, I've already discussed very similar topics at length here. Not even gonna comment right now because I can feel the pettiness beating strong today and I'm going to say something I'll regret. But if you've been following this closely or know me well, you can probably guess what I'd have said.

[aleksanderscult]

I have read about more capable heroes being more civil to a lot more heinous villains to solve problems. What do you thinking provoking him in this way would solve? Also yess about the "small victory" 😭. Miss Zoya, what would you have done if he had said no? HE was being reasonable here, you are being childish. Also what a waste to not use him: his experience, advice, allies, spies. Like? Ask him about that. Try to get information from him about that. Then use your own brain to filter it out and sort out the truths from the lies, what is this "you are EVILLLLL" thing going to do in your favour? You are having self doubts but you don't even think to look at him as an example. If ypu think he truly achieved nothing then at least use him as example on what not to do. All of this involves asking him questions like ughh.

We do not need our hero to constantly belittle the villain to seem him as a villain. The hero being able to put aside his pride for the greater good and working out an arrangement with the person he hates is an admirable thing. Which ok, your hero is allowed to not have. But then that is a flaw or ar least just not very heroic. And it's pretty absurd for all of your long list of heroes to have the same fucking flaw. How are they all on the same page. When did they become a hive mind?

THIS!!! THIS!!!

ALL OF THIS, GUYS!!!!

Literally, anon, I have nothing else to add. You explained it PERFECTLY!!

Just like you said, you don't need to have the heroes criticise the villain and point his evil actions and flaws. (Because NO SHIT SHERLOCK WE HAVE EYES AND HAVE ALREADY SAW THEM OURSELVES)

His actions have already spoken for himself and you should let the reader make his own conclusion and opinion about him.

Also:

WE DON'T READ THE FUCKING BOOKS TO GET CRITICIZED FOR LIKING A CHARACTER

BUT TO ENTERTAIN OURSELVES AND FORGET OUR LIFE PROBLEMS!!

Thank you.

Also, agree on how the FUCK ARE THEY ALL ON THE SAME PAGE???

Alina was willing to believe him in the beginning (S&B) but she got brainwashed by her surroundings and then she joined the "We're all right and devoted to good here and that fucker is nothing but EVIL!" gang. Now, how the Hell do they all agree on this, I don't know for the life of me.

And the last thing I want to comment and agree on is that in some other books I've read, things were kind of different.

Harry Potter books: The main character felt bad for Voldemort when he saw his past and understood his motivations based on his parentage and childhood (the "heroes" in the trilogy could never).

Percy Jackson books: At the end of the last book the main character (after killing the villain) decides to end the real problem that began the whole war (something that Alina never did with the Grisha after killing the Darkling).

So, to sum up, I agree with everything, anon. We share the same braincell on this.

[destinyc1020]

i will say something that frustrates me a bit, tom could dominate hollywood like Zendaya and timmy if he chooses too. he's got the skills, hes got the charisma, hes got the looks, and unlike Z who had to work her ass off for where she is today, he's got privilege. if he just go to the right events and make the right connections, and choose the right roles, he could dominate hollywood. of course with roles, there will be hits and misses. i love tom, huge fan of his. he did wonderful with spiderman and uncharted even though people were rooting against, but his charisma and talent won a lot of people over. kid's got potential he just doesnt use it. either because he doesnt want to or doesnt know how to. but it is frustrating as of right now because theres so much potential. the good thing about awards shows and these types of events is that he can meet and talk to some major players in hollywood, he just doesnt want to go, and i get why, he said why but doesnt change things. Timmy uses his star power, and though a bit pretentious and hungry for fame which i dislike, hes (for the most part/ he made poor decisions over the last month or 2) smart. he goes to events, he mingles with people, he chooses to work with powerful and big name directors and you've got to give him that at least. same with JE. and i hate JE literally. hes more pretentious and obnoxious, no charisma but him and his team are super smart. i will give them that at least.

Thanks for your honest thoughts and opinions Anon.

You know, I kind of hear this type of sentiment from many Tom stans quite a lot, and I'm wondering if possibly what's going on here is that SOME of Tom's stans sort of feel like he started off on such a great foot with his earlier indie career, and then with Spider-Man, but then now...Some may feel as though Tom is kind of lagging behind his peers, especially when they see other actors around his same age (even up-and-coming actors) seeming to be "eclipsing" Tom (Dom's favorite word lol 😅) in the Hollywood industry career department.

I can sort of see why SOME of Tom's stans who actually really do love him would like to see him having the same prestige, film roles, or perceived "hype" in Hollywood that they see other young actors getting in the industry.

With all of that said however... I think fans need to take a deep breath, take a step back, and keep in mind first and foremost that the level of fame that Tom has is NOT something that is easy for most people.

Tom was announced as being the next Spider-Man in 2015, and then he was first seen in "Captain America: Civil War" in 2016....then from there he went on to film his OWN solo Spidey film, "Spiderman: HOCO" in 2016....and then, a year later, he was thrust and catapulted into a level of fame that he had never experienced before after his film HOCO came out in 2017.

Tom's popularity and fame has only INCREASED since 2017. Most of that is due to Marvel and being in some of the most highest-grossing blockbuster films in the WORLD, and another part of that is due to Tom's general likability, friendliness, and charismatic nature that just seems to come naturally to him. 😊

I don't even think that fans can really compare Tom's fame level to lesser-known actors, or even to Timothee Chalamet, who JUST recently reached 19 Million followers on Instagram, whereas meanwhile, Tom has 66.3 Million followers on Instagram. I just don't think that's really fair.

Timothee has also had the added benefit of being able to sort of "fly under the radar" somewhat. While Timothee is yes, very popular, has a huge fanbase, and has critical acclaim with tons of award nominations and a few wins under his belt, he also has usually primarily stuck to mostly smaller, indie films throughout most of his career, so Timmy's fame has seen more of slightly gradual increase in fame level, as opposed to becoming WILDLY HUGE overnight, as was the case with Tom.

I've always said that if I were to ever become famous, I would rather be SEMI-famous, and still be able to live a somewhat normal life, do my work, go home, and have a pretty basic lifestyle, vs being MEGA-famous, barely being able to walk out of my front door without being papped or chased by fans, or always being asked for a picture (or sometimes not even asked), and having my life constantly up for discussion. And a "Private life"? What's that?? I would much prefer the former rather than the latter.

I don't think fans realize that fame (especially large amounts of it) can really mess with someone's head. While at the outset it might seem fun, exciting, addictive and even intoxicating at first, fans don't realize that later on down the line, this level of fame can make you feel suffocated after a while. 😔

Many actors (and celebrities just in general) have suffered from anxiety, loneliness, DEPRESSION, paranoia, and worthlessness just simply due to having to deal with massive amounts of fame, hate online, and the constant feeling of their lives being under a microscope. 😔

Based on what Tom (and his dad) has said, to me it almost seems as though he would rather try to live a more normal life, as opposed to getting even MORE increasingly famous. We have to remember that unlike some actors who may have always dreamed of acting or being famous, Tom was sort of thrown into acting due to being spotted by a talent scout. He ended up liking it and just stuck with it, but it's not like he was somebody who was dreaming of being an actor or being famous one day, like some others might.

Dom has even said recently on a podcast that he doesn't even worry about Tom's career in Hollywood... He worries MOST about whether or not his son will have the ability to live a somewhat normal LIFE. To me, that was very telling. 😔

Personally?? I think that overall Tom will be okay. But like you yourself even mentioned, we need to ask ourselves if continuing to be massively famous is something that Tom himself even wants?? 🤔 To me, it seems like Tom has other more important goals in his life that take more priority. Jmho.

While Tom I'm sure enjoys acting, and might even wish to direct films one day, I don't get the impression that he is particularly all that comfortable with the huge fame aspect of it. That can be somewhat daunting for anybody.

I think fans need to have some mercy and grace, and realize that Tom is doing just fine, and he will be okay. 😊 Like you mentioned, he has some privilege in Hollywood that not all people (especially woc) are afforded. I know fans only want Tom to be getting accolades because we all know and see his talent, his potential, and want certain roles for him, or for him to work with certain directors/actors, etc. But we have to ask ourselves: "What does TOM want?" 🤔

[justagalwhowrites]

idk if it’s just me but i love stories that are slow burns and no matter how long it takes i’ve never looked at it as “dragging on”. it’s all about the development and the build up that makes me most excited to keep up with a story. i genuinely do not care how long it takes i FUCKING LOVE IT. (i think that anon was out of line and RUDE to come to you directly anonymously serving up criticism on your own story like you asked for it? tf????)

i love the slow burn and the angst and the main characters going off and dating other people, and the messiness, and the heartbreak, and them getting back together and breaking up again, etc etc. i love your writing kit. like to ME those stories are the most memorable and i revisit those stories the most. you’re an amazing writer, and you’re a very kind and lovely person, you handled that with such grace (whereas i wouldn’t have) and i hate that you had to be civil in your response. i’m sorry that you have to deal with that bullshit. LOVE YOU KIT AND THANK YOU FOR THE INCREDIBLE, ANGSTY, SLOW BURN, HEART BREAKING STORIES YOU SHARE WITH US!!!!!!!!!!! 🩷

Hi Bestie,

I'm definitely a fan of slow burns, in case my writing style didn't give that away lol. I love angst (again, I think this is obvious by now lol) and I'm glad there are other people who enjoy it, too. I do feel like I open myself up to criticism by sharing my work. I'm not seeking it out but I'm never going to block anyone or anything for sharing their thoughts, even if they're not positive.

It really does mean so much that you love my stories and that they're stories you keep coming back to! You're such a lovely person, Noelle, thank you for being you and for being here.

Love you!

[criminalcase-confessions]

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[jotun-design-party]

Oh also! (Sorry to bother again same anon)

As far as the “less advanced” thing you addressed, I have seen it portrayed sometimes as the only reason they are a bit less advanced is because at one point because of an aesir-jotnar war which jotunheim lost that Asgard took their casket away and were super overkill with the restrictions and so the nature of their realm was deteriorating and their supplies but at one point they were just as highly advanced and their realm was just as upkept as the others. Is this depiction also harmful?

No obligation or rush to answer this or anything! Just curious about your thoughts on the subject no worries if you are unable to answer thank you for the response to the last question! Good day;D

it's no bother, don't worry! and it all depends on how you choose to portray it, honestly

i don't personally enjoy the idea of a culture being "less advanced," because from a western standpoint, a lot of that comes from colonization and the idea that one culture is less worthwhile because they don't meet european ideals. a lot of it comes from the idea that a culture has to be techy to be civilized. an example is like, mud hut houses are no less architecturally intelligent than a wooden cabin. one might even argue that mud hut houses are architecturally smarter than wooden cabins, because they're built sustainably and effectively with heat mitigation and every-day life in mind. it takes a lot of unlearning of propaganda that we've been fed since pre-school. it comes with a lot of critical thinking and challenging your own view of what counts as "advanced"

personally, i like the idea of a jötunheim which was never one-to-one with asgard, because their IDEALS were different. im a sucker for stories where a culture lives in a harsh environment, during a war or post-war, but they thrive despite it. y'know? but this is all just my own two cents. i am by no means the expert on any of this, and my goal here is just trying to get people's gears turning

[coeluvr]

To that last anon: Bruh, you could have been a lot more civil and have your criticism be actually constructive instead of being an attempt at demotivating the author. Grow up, seriously.

To you, my dear author: Please don't take people like these seriously enough. I'm all for constructive criticism, but this was, as I see it, a pathetic attempt at bullying. Sending you lots of hugs and love, author!!! 💕💕💕💕😄😄❤️

They won't get to me that easily so don't worry 🥳 I shouldn't have responded to them in the first place but I was in a bad mood and they were there so...

Hateful anons are always spouting things and not saying what's actually an issue (grammar errors where? tell me?? 🤨) because they don't truly want to help, they just want to tear people down 🤷🏾‍♀️

Thank you, dear anon 💗💗 and thank you to everyone else who sent me a message.