#thanks for being civil in your criticisms anon!

[jayjay-thejet-plane]

Heyy I'm the "why are all the good supernatural artists terrible people" guy. My point was, your art is genuinely amazing and I love how you draw characters and use colors ect ect, excepttt the fact you like incest. like actually what the fuck it's like a punch to the gut

What a lovely compliment fr, thank you!

I like sam and dean’s relationship specifically… its not like i like irl incest🤨

I was a bit of an anti once… and then neutral, but ive realized its all a bit silly

Do you truly believe every person who has ever made a film, written a book, or made art that includes illegal stuff (murder, incest, noncon, torture, cannibalism, underage, blackmail, physical assault, robbery, cheating etc. (the list goes on)) is a terrible person?🤔

People portray fictional characters doing sketchy shit all the time, we generally dont assume they think its chill to do irl… nor do we think they are bad people for liking to make horror movies for example

I promise you that horror film makers genuinely enjoy making fucked up gory shit, so why cant i enjoy drawing some fictional brothers making out? Do you think incest is worse than torture and murder🤨 i personally would rather some siblings fuck each other irl than people get tortured irl but maybe thats just me

Obviously you dont have to like my wincest art, if it gives you the ick thats totally fair! I get the ick from plenty of things myself. But maybe dont base your judgement of others/morals on your ick response…

Live and let live💙

[velvetvexations]

This is how I rationalize FHJY.

If a trans man or intersex person pings both the trans and feminine flags to a transphobe they can very well expirience transmisogny while not being transfem. I genuinely think TMA would be effective and important if it were unifying people who expirience severe transmisogny regardless of gender or sex or identity! And in that case we probably wouldn't even need TME! If we are just talking about specific people who share this expirience of oppression then there is no need to define an out-group, the very definition implies one, and the lack of an outgroup term fixes the issue with intersexism by not creating an unneeded binary! But as it stands it legit just means "amab transfem" and thus there us NO reason you can't just say "transfem" like? What is the point if this term? Why do we need a word that seems to cover a broad spectrum of people if it legit only means transfems? We can still say "transmisogny primarily targets transfems" without TMA, and we can just say transmacs and cis people if we're talking about people who aren't transfem without TME. If a word for what you are or your expirience or your community as a whole doesn't exist, like monosexism or transandrophobia or allosexual/romantic, then yes we need new terminology, but if you are just adding another term that means the exact same thing and is even MORE exclusive, harms intersex people, and is clearly being used as a bludgeoning tool to hurt other trans people...then I don't see the point at all.

Being used as a bludgeoning tool IS the point.

Thank you, anon. <3 It wasn't good for either of us.

A lotta people still really cling to the idea that misogyny is the root of all evils an it's weird to see that happening in the trans community but I guess it ain't surprising cuz everyone here experiences misogyny in some form or another... Tho I guess that idea spooks some people too, shooting back with "you can't call that misogyny you're just misgendering yourself" when guys like me say we still experience misogyny, but w/e. Transphobes misgendered me first it's not some fucked up internalized transphobia to say they think I'm a silly girl who wants to escape my station. An even if I were misgendering myself, that's fine actually. I can misgender myself if I wanna. It's nobody else's place to say whether I can or can't misgender myself while addressing my interpretation of the bigotry I'm faced with. It's weird that that's even a criticism to begin with tbh methinks somebody's projecting their dysphoria onto others.

I do genuinely want to see civil war between the extremely online leftists who think all transphobia is misogyny and all transphobia is racism.

[olderthannetfic]

To the NLOG anon:

I had written a long piece but lost it, so the gist of it is that bullies are social chameleons. They will always try to find a way to get away with bullying while claiming to be the victims. And many of the "bad" NLOGs were girls looking for ways to recreate the status quo with them at the top instead.

I think that NLOGs were a natural result of the post 9/11 conservative paranoia of "anyone who is not a good American™ is a Satanic Menace to Society" (where good American meant white, christian, affluent, thin, conventionally attractive, straight...and everybody else, from foreigners, fat people, anyone gender non conforming or even alternative people were "planning the downfall of civilization"). In that climate, harassment towards "the weird" was not only tolerated but encouraged as the moral thing to do.

And the thing is, if you are ostracized from society but discouraged to learn about feminism and such, then it's no wonder that your only way of defending yourself is by using the same attacks used against you!

The big change here I think came with the recession where suddenly society became fascinated with the weird, and being a hipster or a nerdy girl was "acceptable" (hence the "golden years" of Tumblr). Many of the bullies who had gained notoriety thanks to their privilege suddenly realised they couldn't get away with it as talk about discrimination and feminism was becoming more commonplace, and so many people adopted NLOG looks and attitudes to keep doing society approved bullying.

Nowadays tho you don't see many NLOGs because, like you said, we either know better now and have deconstructed ourselves or simply because in this era of "bring back bullying" most people don't need to hide behind underprivileged people to harass someone. If they want to hate on other women they can just become a tradwife/high value woman and go back to the conservative politics of the 2000s or they can pick a bit of #girlbossfeminism while going back to their hyper feminine roots to claim *throws dice* that you have to like pink or you have internalised misogyny and that you should just try to fit into the mold, for your own good, you know.

So yeah, those who want to oppress will find a way to do so under any costume, while being the loudest and sidelining the rest of us. There's nothing to do about it, unfortunately :(

--

I mean... sure...

But the actual phrase "not like the other girls" rose to prominence to point out how fucking obnoxious a class of book is for its heroine who is always like "I don't want to stay home and do needlework!" and then the book is set in some era when rich ladies are supposed to be running an entire manor house or something, not just embroider, and the author has blatantly missed all of that. Or it's some Anita Blake bullshit where the heroine hates literally every other woman, and especially all of them with blond hair because the author is insecure and bugfuck nuts.

It's a specific dumb trope in fiction and term in criticism of that dumb trope.

[burst-of-iridescent]

Hello! Zutarians like you are the reason why I am moving further away from Zutara. the way you talk rudely to people who disagree with you is really upsetting. The anon who wrote to you (or several anons) did not show rudeness and spoke quite politely, but you literally immediately started being rude, talking arrogantly and familiarly. the fact that someone does not agree with you does not mean that you need to talk rudely, arrogantly or point out mistakes in English to people (it may come as a shock to you, but a lot of young people do not have the opportunity to get a good education and do not have the opportunity to know English perfectly, especially if it is not their native language). thank you, you completely ruined zutara for me.

do you think it's polite to come into someone's inbox just to mock an edit they spent a lot of time and effort on, which they tagged appropriately for the express purpose of making sure no one who enjoyed kat.aang would see it? do you think it's polite to then follow up with an unasked-for essay in response, one that misappropriates the legitimate issues faced by women of colour to tear down a fictional ship? do you think it's polite to invalidate the racial identity of an actual woman of colour just because she doesn't agree with your opinions? do you think it's polite to keep anonymously bombarding strangers you don't know online with condescending, bad-faith arguments that don't take into account anything they're trying to say?

do you think that perhaps, just perhaps, after dealing with all of that for 24 hours straight, people might not feel inclined to be cheery and pleasant to the person responsible for it?

the fact that someone does not agree with you does not mean that you need to talk rudely, arrogantly or point out mistakes in English to people

i couldn't agree more. that is why i am perfectly willing to engage in polite, civil discussion with people who are actually arguing in good-faith, and who don't harass me online or associate with others who do.

i have no idea why you seem to think i criticized that anon's english by the way; if that is from my "pay attention in english class" remark, i was referring to media literacy skills (a fair point to make, considering that's exactly what they came into my asks about). not once did i ever remark on their grammar, spelling, or anything else about their english, nor do i feel the need to.

but if it's more important to you to blame and tone police me instead of the person who's been harassing me for the last two days, then please know that i'm not the one ruining zutara and zutara fandom for you.

you're doing that just fine on your own.

[blighted-lights]

I feel like your approach to criticizing a certain fandom was the wrong way of doing it. Don't get me wrong, you are a hundred percent right about the lack of representation for certain characters. But you had to have known that you would've gotten backlash for insinuating that the only reason that content is being made is because people are... misogynistic? The characters are well-written; that's why they get attention. The women are also well-written, you're right! But instead of getting mad at the people who enjoy specific characters, you could contribute to what you want to see in the fandom. Make fanfiction, make art, talk about your favorite ships, talk about your favorite characters, talk about the head-canons you have for them, connect with other fans of those characters, make AUs with them, make the fandom you want to see! But I don't know what you were expecting when you come out and say in the tags "you must be misogynists for liking these characters and you must be awful people for playing around with AUs" even though every fandom on this website does that. That was hostile and was only going to get a hostile response in return especially when you specifically put it in the tags for fans of those characters to see. Because it reads as you insinuating that fans of these characters existing is why you don't get any representation of your favorite characters. Or, alternatively, that everyone only likes certain characters because they're misogynists who hate women characters. People make content of them because they like them and because they want to make content of them.

Want more content of the things you want to see? Pay or support the artists and writers who make that content or start making it yourself. Its not helpful to complain that some characters get more attention than others but then make no attempt to contribute to it in any meaningful way. You cannot just get mad at people for liking characters and expect the fandom to magically decide its going to give you the content you want.

This is a long-winded way of saying you are correct in that the fandom seems to hyper-focus on some characters over others. But the way you approached that discussion was combative, hostile, and unhelpful, and you're not going to motivate a community into making content by being passive-aggressive to the people making the content they want to make. Be the change you want to see in the fandom, or support the artists and writers who make the content you want to see.

Its like... You can't complain your garden isn't growing if you're not watering it and not adding seeds, and instead are blaming everyone else for having plants in their gardens that you don't like.

anon i dont know how to tell you this but if you felt the need to write a five-paragraph essay talking about how i need to be nicer to other people when i am pointing out misogyny in a fandom space then, well... actually, i dont know what to tell you other than the fact that i was trying to be aggressive and im not going to be civil about misogyny. my post wasn't made in the hopes of getting people to make more content of the women in borderlands because that would never in ten fucking million years work. it was not a constructive post. you are assuming i have some sort of goodwill about this and i don't. i wanted to be an asshole because, surprise, i am an asshole. funny how that works.

you are also pulling so much of this out of nowhere and putting so many words in my mouth that i dont even know where to begin with it?? i mean this in the kindest way possible nonnie but. this is a wild response to make when all i said was essentially "wow it sure is weird that the majority of content made for bl is focused on only three men when there's a full cast of amazing women to look at" and then "its also weird that people are making aus to erase the canon abuse and exploitation of a CHILD in order to make jack a good father". but thanks for the essay, nonnie. i guess.

[aleksanderscult]

I have read about more capable heroes being more civil to a lot more heinous villains to solve problems. What do you thinking provoking him in this way would solve? Also yess about the "small victory" 😭. Miss Zoya, what would you have done if he had said no? HE was being reasonable here, you are being childish. Also what a waste to not use him: his experience, advice, allies, spies. Like? Ask him about that. Try to get information from him about that. Then use your own brain to filter it out and sort out the truths from the lies, what is this "you are EVILLLLL" thing going to do in your favour? You are having self doubts but you don't even think to look at him as an example. If ypu think he truly achieved nothing then at least use him as example on what not to do. All of this involves asking him questions like ughh.

We do not need our hero to constantly belittle the villain to seem him as a villain. The hero being able to put aside his pride for the greater good and working out an arrangement with the person he hates is an admirable thing. Which ok, your hero is allowed to not have. But then that is a flaw or ar least just not very heroic. And it's pretty absurd for all of your long list of heroes to have the same fucking flaw. How are they all on the same page. When did they become a hive mind?

THIS!!! THIS!!!

ALL OF THIS, GUYS!!!!

Literally, anon, I have nothing else to add. You explained it PERFECTLY!!

Just like you said, you don't need to have the heroes criticise the villain and point his evil actions and flaws. (Because NO SHIT SHERLOCK WE HAVE EYES AND HAVE ALREADY SAW THEM OURSELVES)

His actions have already spoken for himself and you should let the reader make his own conclusion and opinion about him.

Also:

WE DON'T READ THE FUCKING BOOKS TO GET CRITICIZED FOR LIKING A CHARACTER

BUT TO ENTERTAIN OURSELVES AND FORGET OUR LIFE PROBLEMS!!

Thank you.

Also, agree on how the FUCK ARE THEY ALL ON THE SAME PAGE???

Alina was willing to believe him in the beginning (S&B) but she got brainwashed by her surroundings and then she joined the "We're all right and devoted to good here and that fucker is nothing but EVIL!" gang. Now, how the Hell do they all agree on this, I don't know for the life of me.

And the last thing I want to comment and agree on is that in some other books I've read, things were kind of different.

Harry Potter books: The main character felt bad for Voldemort when he saw his past and understood his motivations based on his parentage and childhood (the "heroes" in the trilogy could never).

Percy Jackson books: At the end of the last book the main character (after killing the villain) decides to end the real problem that began the whole war (something that Alina never did with the Grisha after killing the Darkling).

So, to sum up, I agree with everything, anon. We share the same braincell on this.

[destinyc1020]

i will say something that frustrates me a bit, tom could dominate hollywood like Zendaya and timmy if he chooses too. he's got the skills, hes got the charisma, hes got the looks, and unlike Z who had to work her ass off for where she is today, he's got privilege. if he just go to the right events and make the right connections, and choose the right roles, he could dominate hollywood. of course with roles, there will be hits and misses. i love tom, huge fan of his. he did wonderful with spiderman and uncharted even though people were rooting against, but his charisma and talent won a lot of people over. kid's got potential he just doesnt use it. either because he doesnt want to or doesnt know how to. but it is frustrating as of right now because theres so much potential. the good thing about awards shows and these types of events is that he can meet and talk to some major players in hollywood, he just doesnt want to go, and i get why, he said why but doesnt change things. Timmy uses his star power, and though a bit pretentious and hungry for fame which i dislike, hes (for the most part/ he made poor decisions over the last month or 2) smart. he goes to events, he mingles with people, he chooses to work with powerful and big name directors and you've got to give him that at least. same with JE. and i hate JE literally. hes more pretentious and obnoxious, no charisma but him and his team are super smart. i will give them that at least.

Thanks for your honest thoughts and opinions Anon.

You know, I kind of hear this type of sentiment from many Tom stans quite a lot, and I'm wondering if possibly what's going on here is that SOME of Tom's stans sort of feel like he started off on such a great foot with his earlier indie career, and then with Spider-Man, but then now...Some may feel as though Tom is kind of lagging behind his peers, especially when they see other actors around his same age (even up-and-coming actors) seeming to be "eclipsing" Tom (Dom's favorite word lol 😅) in the Hollywood industry career department.

I can sort of see why SOME of Tom's stans who actually really do love him would like to see him having the same prestige, film roles, or perceived "hype" in Hollywood that they see other young actors getting in the industry.

With all of that said however... I think fans need to take a deep breath, take a step back, and keep in mind first and foremost that the level of fame that Tom has is NOT something that is easy for most people.

Tom was announced as being the next Spider-Man in 2015, and then he was first seen in "Captain America: Civil War" in 2016....then from there he went on to film his OWN solo Spidey film, "Spiderman: HOCO" in 2016....and then, a year later, he was thrust and catapulted into a level of fame that he had never experienced before after his film HOCO came out in 2017.

Tom's popularity and fame has only INCREASED since 2017. Most of that is due to Marvel and being in some of the most highest-grossing blockbuster films in the WORLD, and another part of that is due to Tom's general likability, friendliness, and charismatic nature that just seems to come naturally to him. 😊

I don't even think that fans can really compare Tom's fame level to lesser-known actors, or even to Timothee Chalamet, who JUST recently reached 19 Million followers on Instagram, whereas meanwhile, Tom has 66.3 Million followers on Instagram. I just don't think that's really fair.

Timothee has also had the added benefit of being able to sort of "fly under the radar" somewhat. While Timothee is yes, very popular, has a huge fanbase, and has critical acclaim with tons of award nominations and a few wins under his belt, he also has usually primarily stuck to mostly smaller, indie films throughout most of his career, so Timmy's fame has seen more of slightly gradual increase in fame level, as opposed to becoming WILDLY HUGE overnight, as was the case with Tom.

I've always said that if I were to ever become famous, I would rather be SEMI-famous, and still be able to live a somewhat normal life, do my work, go home, and have a pretty basic lifestyle, vs being MEGA-famous, barely being able to walk out of my front door without being papped or chased by fans, or always being asked for a picture (or sometimes not even asked), and having my life constantly up for discussion. And a "Private life"? What's that?? I would much prefer the former rather than the latter.

I don't think fans realize that fame (especially large amounts of it) can really mess with someone's head. While at the outset it might seem fun, exciting, addictive and even intoxicating at first, fans don't realize that later on down the line, this level of fame can make you feel suffocated after a while. 😔

Many actors (and celebrities just in general) have suffered from anxiety, loneliness, DEPRESSION, paranoia, and worthlessness just simply due to having to deal with massive amounts of fame, hate online, and the constant feeling of their lives being under a microscope. 😔

Based on what Tom (and his dad) has said, to me it almost seems as though he would rather try to live a more normal life, as opposed to getting even MORE increasingly famous. We have to remember that unlike some actors who may have always dreamed of acting or being famous, Tom was sort of thrown into acting due to being spotted by a talent scout. He ended up liking it and just stuck with it, but it's not like he was somebody who was dreaming of being an actor or being famous one day, like some others might.

Dom has even said recently on a podcast that he doesn't even worry about Tom's career in Hollywood... He worries MOST about whether or not his son will have the ability to live a somewhat normal LIFE. To me, that was very telling. 😔

Personally?? I think that overall Tom will be okay. But like you yourself even mentioned, we need to ask ourselves if continuing to be massively famous is something that Tom himself even wants?? 🤔 To me, it seems like Tom has other more important goals in his life that take more priority. Jmho.

While Tom I'm sure enjoys acting, and might even wish to direct films one day, I don't get the impression that he is particularly all that comfortable with the huge fame aspect of it. That can be somewhat daunting for anybody.

I think fans need to have some mercy and grace, and realize that Tom is doing just fine, and he will be okay. 😊 Like you mentioned, he has some privilege in Hollywood that not all people (especially woc) are afforded. I know fans only want Tom to be getting accolades because we all know and see his talent, his potential, and want certain roles for him, or for him to work with certain directors/actors, etc. But we have to ask ourselves: "What does TOM want?" 🤔

[justagalwhowrites]

idk if it’s just me but i love stories that are slow burns and no matter how long it takes i’ve never looked at it as “dragging on”. it’s all about the development and the build up that makes me most excited to keep up with a story. i genuinely do not care how long it takes i FUCKING LOVE IT. (i think that anon was out of line and RUDE to come to you directly anonymously serving up criticism on your own story like you asked for it? tf????)

i love the slow burn and the angst and the main characters going off and dating other people, and the messiness, and the heartbreak, and them getting back together and breaking up again, etc etc. i love your writing kit. like to ME those stories are the most memorable and i revisit those stories the most. you’re an amazing writer, and you’re a very kind and lovely person, you handled that with such grace (whereas i wouldn’t have) and i hate that you had to be civil in your response. i’m sorry that you have to deal with that bullshit. LOVE YOU KIT AND THANK YOU FOR THE INCREDIBLE, ANGSTY, SLOW BURN, HEART BREAKING STORIES YOU SHARE WITH US!!!!!!!!!!! 🩷

Hi Bestie,

I'm definitely a fan of slow burns, in case my writing style didn't give that away lol. I love angst (again, I think this is obvious by now lol) and I'm glad there are other people who enjoy it, too. I do feel like I open myself up to criticism by sharing my work. I'm not seeking it out but I'm never going to block anyone or anything for sharing their thoughts, even if they're not positive.

It really does mean so much that you love my stories and that they're stories you keep coming back to! You're such a lovely person, Noelle, thank you for being you and for being here.

Love you!

[criminalcase-confessions]

Rules!

Before you submit, take a look at the rules:

🔍Be civil: Self-explanatory; please try to remain kind and civil when submitting something to or interacting with this account.

🔍Confessions can be lighthearted: Headcanons, memes, jokes, and incorrect quotes are allowed and encouraged.

🔍Discourse is allowed: You can submit a controversial/serious statement. As per the first rule, however, maintain civility.

🔍No harassment/witch hunting: The mods don't necessarily agree with everything that is submitted here. Please do not harass this account because of a submission you disagree with. By extent, do not harass people because you disagree with something they have submitted to this account.

🔍Similar to the previous rule: Do not make submissions that encourage the harassment of another user.

🔍Vagueposting is not allowed: You are here to state an opinion, not use the safety of anonymity to attack people without repercussions. If you dislike someone, settle it privately. Attacking specific groups of people (i.e. attacking a character's fans instead of criticizing the character itself) is not allowed either.

🔍If you think you're being vagued in an anon, DM us and we'll take the submission down. Additionally, you can DM us if you want your own submission taken down.

🔍No bigotry: Queerphobia, sexism, racism, classism, xenophobia, or any kind of bigotry whatsoever is not allowed, either. Anti-ACAB or pro-cop sentiments are not allowed, either.

Rules may be added or removed at the mods' discretion.

Mods:

🧸 Mod Dove: They/them

⚕️Mod Ricky: He/him

Thank you for reading!

[jotun-design-party]

Oh also! (Sorry to bother again same anon)

As far as the “less advanced” thing you addressed, I have seen it portrayed sometimes as the only reason they are a bit less advanced is because at one point because of an aesir-jotnar war which jotunheim lost that Asgard took their casket away and were super overkill with the restrictions and so the nature of their realm was deteriorating and their supplies but at one point they were just as highly advanced and their realm was just as upkept as the others. Is this depiction also harmful?

No obligation or rush to answer this or anything! Just curious about your thoughts on the subject no worries if you are unable to answer thank you for the response to the last question! Good day;D

it's no bother, don't worry! and it all depends on how you choose to portray it, honestly

i don't personally enjoy the idea of a culture being "less advanced," because from a western standpoint, a lot of that comes from colonization and the idea that one culture is less worthwhile because they don't meet european ideals. a lot of it comes from the idea that a culture has to be techy to be civilized. an example is like, mud hut houses are no less architecturally intelligent than a wooden cabin. one might even argue that mud hut houses are architecturally smarter than wooden cabins, because they're built sustainably and effectively with heat mitigation and every-day life in mind. it takes a lot of unlearning of propaganda that we've been fed since pre-school. it comes with a lot of critical thinking and challenging your own view of what counts as "advanced"

personally, i like the idea of a jötunheim which was never one-to-one with asgard, because their IDEALS were different. im a sucker for stories where a culture lives in a harsh environment, during a war or post-war, but they thrive despite it. y'know? but this is all just my own two cents. i am by no means the expert on any of this, and my goal here is just trying to get people's gears turning

[coeluvr]

To that last anon: Bruh, you could have been a lot more civil and have your criticism be actually constructive instead of being an attempt at demotivating the author. Grow up, seriously.

To you, my dear author: Please don't take people like these seriously enough. I'm all for constructive criticism, but this was, as I see it, a pathetic attempt at bullying. Sending you lots of hugs and love, author!!! 💕💕💕💕😄😄❤️

They won't get to me that easily so don't worry 🥳 I shouldn't have responded to them in the first place but I was in a bad mood and they were there so...

Hateful anons are always spouting things and not saying what's actually an issue (grammar errors where? tell me?? 🤨) because they don't truly want to help, they just want to tear people down 🤷🏾‍♀️

Thank you, dear anon 💗💗 and thank you to everyone else who sent me a message.

[bluegekk0]

I just read through that critical anon shit and omg Gekko I want to hug you so bad.

I literally laid eyes on your fpk au in the main hk tag back during some of your first posts of the au and I was instantly like “You. You get it.” Just something about his in game character that wanted those animalistic instincts gone from his subjects only to have to succumb to the them is delicious to me. And the more content you do of it, the more he succumbs and just AAAHH I LOVE IT SO MUCH!

idk why but it just resonates with me.

Even if your content doesn’t resonate with some peeps, it will resonate with someone, and that’s what matters: the people that will respect and love the content you do no matter what.

This is honestly just mind vomit rn. I just wanted to express my admiration to make you feel better. 🥺

omg it's you, i recognize you from my inbox. i just wanted to say that some of the tags you leave under my fpk au stuff always make my day, i love when people go crazy about it hahaha

but thank you, that really means a lot to hear. and omg same, i love that aspect of his character. especially since, as i developed him further, it became something that was a part of him since the beginning. i hope you don't mind i go on a little tangent here. he's always been a bit of a hypocrite regarding this particular fact. the instincts he wanted gone from his subjects never left him, and it's why he continued to sustain himself with soul even though his smaller form meant that he also needed less food to survive. and that was slowly killing him, since he needed food, but was too scared of being seen as a hypocrite. and no, he unfortunately wasn't able to eat slowly and in an elegant manner. the years of living off of scraps and fighting for them as a weak runt permanently rewired his brain to be food greedy, and he couldn't control himself no matter how much he tried

when he was forced to eat, following the loss of his powers, it was a big obstacle he had to get through, but he did accept it eventually. does it make him a hypocrite? i would say so, though i think that makes him more interesting. especially since doing so ended up making his life better, so it only serves to show him how wrong he was to push that message onto those who might have had similar experiences to him. and there's still always the chance that someone will see it and find it gross and unacceptable, and i think it would be ironic if it was because of his past views and the message he shared with the bugs

plus it creates some nice contrast between individual communities of hallownest in the au: places are dirtmouth are way more accepting of this way of life since they have always been more "primitive", as the city bugs would call them. and those city bugs, who ironically have always been following the ways of the king more closely, would now see him as nothing but a disgusting beast. and since some of those city bugs survived the infection and began to slowly rebuild the community, it means that he does not feel welcome there anymore. big fan of his past actions continuing to bite him in the ass, he was the one who taught them this way of life, and now he's experiencing first-hand how it may have affected the bugs that were seen as less civilized by the city folk. another thing for his looooong list of regrets

ah, sorry for rambling about this under the ask that did not specifically ask for it. know that i appreciate your words very much, and i'm really grateful for your support. thank you ❤️

[warsofasoiaf]

Without lionizing Gaddafi (who by all accounts was a real piece of work), how well would you say the western intervention in Libya generally? Not having studied in closely, it seems to be a disaster twice over. First, because it destabilized North Africa specifically and the Mediterranean more generally, and second it sent every strong man in the world a clear message: "Do not give up your nukes. The nukes are all that prevents them from doing you the same way."

I don't think criticizing foreign action, whether specific mistakes or in general, is lionizing Gaddafi. I think that's a binary thought process - either you're pro-foreign intervention or pro-Gaddafi, where there's actually a whole gulf of possibilities not in either camp. This isn't a new problem, though, straw manning is an old rhetorical device, and it's not going away any time soon.

I disagree that the message "Do not give up your nukes. The nukes are all that prevents them from doing you the same way," was communicated by this though. Countries that have desired nuclear programs (Iran, North Korea) have sought to develop them regardless of Libya nuclear dismantlement - Iran's program was ongoing when Libya agreed to dismantle them in 2003, same with North Korea. Arguably, Cold War deterrence theory has already established that message. Similarly, plenty of non-nuclear equipped strongmen and kleptocrats have maintained their brutal stranglehold on their countries without the aid of nuclear weapons, usually through seeking a foreign military patron, selling a valuable resource (often extracted under near-slave working conditions), or just not being worth the hassle. Also, nuclear weapons are notoriously difficult to use, particularly for a small country, and they're a one-shot pistol. A country with a tiny nuclear weapons program can't be guaranteed of successful employment, cannot be guaranteed of secrecy, etc.

It's not an easy question for serious examination, not just because of politically-charged nature of the question but because "Western intervention" in terms of the NATO mission ended in 2011 and the Second Libyan Civil War erupted into violence in 2014. So in that sense, what is attributable to the power vacuum left by Gaddafi's death and what was not. A large-scale uprising against Gaddafi was almost inevitable given the context of the Arab Spring and reprisal against Gaddafi's repressive regime. The protests weren't sparked by foreign intervention (despite Gaddafi's claims and frequently-online claims of "CIA color revolutions" that always crop up), and Gaddafi was certainly killing a lot of protestors when intervention was authorized. In the narrow mission scope of preventing Gaddafi from murdering his own civilians, that's successful, but that's a bit like saying the War in Afghanistan was successful when Hamid Karzai was installed: the aftermath matters, especially to the civilians that live there. The GNC was unable to address Libyan civilian concerns and factional fighting (supported by various factions including Russia, Turkey, Egypt, etc.) erupted again. If we measure the western intervention's success against its mission goal of "prevent a humanitarian catastrophe," then it succeeded in the short-term only, and helped create the conditions for a humanitarian catastrophe. In that sense, it can't be seen as a success.

Thanks for the question, Anon.

SomethingLikeALawyer, Hand of the King

[lunarw0rks]

i don't mean to come off as aggressive, i just want you to think about and listen to poc (specifically hispanic people, like me) when they criticize you for simping over a character that mass murders people like you in game. i'm genuinely sorry for using that comparison because i didn't know that you were jewish, but please just think about how you might feel if people in a fandom tried to justify being attracted to a n*zi character "because the actor is hot." but really, i am sorry for getting heated, i was out of line for that.

i appreciate that you apologized; thank you for being civil.

like i said, and like you said, i'm not a part of a marginalized community like that so it's not my place. nor do i want this blog turning any more political than it already is (considering it's dedicated to war criminals and fictional soldiers)

anon — i recommend filtering your tags so you don't see graves content or blocking me entirely.

let's just leave it at that, please.

[philsmeatylegss]

i would like to respectfully disagree with you being against autism self-diagnosis. feel free to ignore

i come from a unique place of being a glass child but also having to pick up the slack from my parents as even though my siblings are their priority they aren’t doing a good job and i so get where you’re coming from but it isn’t self-diagnosed autistics (even the tiktok ones who have watched one video and decided they’re autistic) that have done this to you.

i don’t agree with self-diagnosis unless the research is extensive but sometimes it is the only option. especially for kids with more severe autistic siblings because parents don’t want to put that label on their children unless they have to. my parents won’t let me get an autism diagnosis because they don’t want another one. as soon as they put a label on me there is no longer a reason to prioritise my siblings over me like they have.

that being said self diagnosed tiktok autistics, who seem to think autism is all hyperfixations and stimming sugarcoat autism (although you have to remember this is social media and everything is sugarcoated).

i have had knives pulled on me at 15 years old because my parents won’t do anything to calm my sister down. i’ve been the only one to comfort my nonverbal brother. but i’ve had my own struggles and just because they were and still are less visible to my parents (and they now blame them on my other diagnosed disorder that is completely different) and the fact im self-diagnosed doesn’t make them less valid

tldr: i have had similar experiences to your 3 months of your brother attempting to kill your mother but think a lack self diagnosis won’t fix that and am self diagnosed myself and your post upset me slightly :(

I’ll start with the tldr because I know I’m gonna ramble and lose the point I want to make:

TLDR: I agree with pretty much everything you just said. Your pov makes a lot of sense. I tend to trust your self diagnosis a lot more since you’ve personally seen all the sides and all the forms Autism presents itself. And you’re right. I should’ve specified that those who are glass children of autistic siblings who self diagnose are way more valid and more likely to be correct than someone who hasn’t experienced it. But even with all of that, I was ranting before and I definitely wasn’t fully thinking through every single possibility. And while I still agree with my original statement, I do believe situations like yours are an exception. But even if I didn’t see it that way, I’m sorry I said something upsetting. That’s never my intent and I always welcome criticism and civil discussions on certain topics. Thank you for sharing your story and making me think over my perspective from a different pov!

I swear I meant for the TLDR to be a sentence so my apologies. But as I said, I do think anon’s (very common) experience is the exception to when I say that self diagnosis for autism isn’t valid. I take into account a lot more when someone with an autistic sibling thinks they have autism for the same reason I get mad at people with no experience with autism who self diagnosis: they know what autism is. They’ve seen the non romanticized aspects of it like violence. They’ve witnessed the varying degrees the disorder presents itself. And most importantly, they know it’s not just a quirky personality trait. They understand the severity of the disorder and it’s not something to brag about.

I truly believe being a glass child, specifically a glass child with an autistic sibling is an experience you cannot fully grasp unless you yourself have gone through it. And though the research is very new, it is most likely that autism is genetic. That’s why it makes complete sense for multiple siblings to have autism with varying degrees of severity as they come from the same genetics. And the whole concept of being a glass child revolves around parents not seeing your needs as important and not having a diagnosis is exactly an example.

As i said, I never want to upset anyone and I always encourage respectful disagreements just as anon did. Explaining your pov without malice. And that’s how I believe both parties can actually learn something from disagreements. That being said, I agree with anon so there isn’t much disagreement.

I just personally believe that being a glass child of an autistic sibling with emotionally neglectful parents is such a unique form of trauma that even those who are experts on autism and on glass children cannot fully grasp. Therefore, I am sensitive to people who take a part of my experience and belittle it. One of my biggest problems is not dealing very well when I feel like someone doesn’t hear me. And this fucking phenomena of autism self diagnosis on tiktok where you’re sent massive amounts of hate for disagreeing is really upsetting for someone like me who is very sensitive to when my emotions and perspective are dismissed. All of this said, none of that applies to this response as I’m sure anon knows exactly where I’m coming from.

I’m just very defensive about the topic and the tendency to dismiss my input is very upsetting to me. So I do have moments when I say extreme statements without logically thinking it through. So I do want to revise my opinion that I do not believe in self diagnosis for autism unless the self diagnosis is being done by someone who has an autistic sibling. Thank you for making this point anon and I’m wishing you so much love <3

[heybaetae]

Kelli I am SO happy I was able to find your blog and follow you for a while now and read your thoughts on things.. It's so refreshing and reassuring, knowing there is someone who thinks similarly to me. I love reading your asks and tags and posts on things that would definitely be "controversial" on stan twitter when in fact, they are just very logical and actually make sense. I tried to find people on twitter who think the same way but I always end up on your blog at the end.

I really love how you try not to glorify idols and the fans' relationships with them and you called out the constant need for content too.. And while I do have to admit, I also like it when we get new content and I love seeing their faces especially if we haven't seen someone in a while, I do try to stop and pace myself. A lot of times I think we can feel if something they filmed was not entirely their choice (I mean it as in it's because of a brand contract or something), but they still have to do it. And they might still enjoy it and that's a really good thing I think! But there are things that I would really like if they kept it to themselves (enlistment bangtan bomb :/) because if it is received positively, others will follow. And this might just be my opinion but bangtan haven't really moved like every other kpop group, they haven't done everything the same way, so I thought maybe they could share less than what others share and what is "expected".

Anyways, I'm really happy you sometimes share your thoughts on things like these. I hope it makes you feel better and you don't get uncomfortable anons because of them. :(

wow, this is so lovely of you to send me. thank you for understanding my intentions with the occasional thoughts/opinions i share here. thankfully, most people are really cool about it even if they don't entirely agree, but i'm pretty open to discussing things further in a civil manner because as i've said before, i think nuanced conversations are healthy to have in a fandom. that's how we learn from each other and make our space better to be apart of! it's just as reassuring to me when someone like you lets me know that i'm not being overly critical or conscious about certain things (i.e. what needs to be content and what doesn't because of the kind of message it sends) and know i'm not the only one feeling how i do in certain situations or big moments. everyone's feelings are valid and it's nice to be reminded of that :)