#thankfully i’m not part of the cuts but it means my team will be reduced by about 90% by the summer

[neondiamond]

.

[jungshookz]

kiss me at midnight; myg

➺ pairing; min yoongi x reader

➺ genre; ceo!y/n x secretary!yoongiverse!! sfw!! fluff!! the title says it all!! this is the moment we’ve all been waiting for!! 

➺ wordcount; 8.1k

➺ summary; y/n finally musters up enough courage to tell yoongi about her i-know-i’m-your-boss-but-i-have-non-boss-feelings-for-you feelings. 

➺ what to expect; “careful, secretary min… i might have to give you a raise if you keep sweet-talking me like that.”

                                      »»————-　♡　————-««

“let’s see… the decorators are coming at 2, the caterers are coming at 6:30, the DJ is coming at 7…” yoongi reads out loud as he goes down his checklist, “the bartender sent over the special drinks menu which i emailed to you this morning, and- ah, right, the caterers mentioned that they were able to switch the mini hot dogs to sliders instead-”

“oh, that’s great! mini hot dogs just don’t carry the same level of class as teeny little hamburgers…” you narrow your eyes slightly as you clasp your hands in front of your face, tapping your fingers against each other, “what about the chocolate lava cakes?”

“mhm, don’t worry, those are on the menu as well, as per your request,” yoongi pauses, “ah- the people bringing the photo-booths are coming to set them up at 5 - we’ve already cleared out the space for them, so that should be good to go… also, are we putting a limit on photos?”

“a limit?”

“yes, a limit,” yoongi looks up at you and shrugs, “there’s only so much film and it wouldn’t be fair for one person to take ten photos and for another person to not have any at all.”

you immediately scoff before dismissing yoongi with a flick of your wrist, “silly yoongi, you can’t put a limit on fun. just tell them we’re willing to pay for extra film and for one of their workers to hang out at the party and wait until the booths need refilling.”

“there.. is no limit… on fun…” yoongi mutters to himself as he continues to scribble notes down in his notebook, “and… that’s it!” he clicks his pen before tucking it back into his shirt pocket, “pretty much everything has been taken care of. if all goes well, this’ll be a fantastic new year’s eve party.”

“yay!” you throw your hands up into the air before leaning back against your chair with a giggle, “this is so exciting. i love throwing parties!”

“and i love planning parties...” yoongi hums absentmindedly, looking back down at his list, “so i guess we make a pretty good team...”

“teamwork makes the dream work, right?”

“mm.” 

a couple seconds of silence ticks by as you scour through your brain for a new topic of discussion

you could... talk about the weather? 

or maybe ask him what he did over the weekend?

ask him about what he did on christmas day?? 

“so…” you clear your throat, smoothing your skirt down before folding your arms on your desk and leaning forward slightly, “you bringin’ any... hot dates to the party tonight?” 

wow

that was... not an ideal topic of discussion 

also, way to sound like a creep! 

“me?” yoongi glances up at you and tilts his head slightly, “well, i’ll be with you.” he pauses, dark brows knitting together, “did you… want me to bring a date?” he shifts in his seat, “i’m sure i can arrange for someone to accompany me if that’s what you want.”

“no!” your eyes widen and you shake your head quickly, “i mean- no, i was just- you know, i just- usually you have a plus-one that you bring to parties and, like, i’m sure that you probably had other new year’s plans that didn’t involve being at the party your boss is throwing- i’m just saying that perhaps, if you were planning on actually bringing someone, i just wouldn’t want to be a cock-block-” 

you’re cut off (thankfully) when yoongi’s phone suddenly starts to buzz on your desk

he extends his arm and catches it right as it’s about to fall off (which, admittedly, shouldn’t have been as hot as it was, but yoongi could be sitting there doing nothing and you’d still find it attractive) 

he holds a finger up pardon himself and you nod before leaning back a little

“hello? …oh, perfect. yes, i can come and pick them up now…” yoongi trails off, sandwiching his phone in between his ear and his shoulder before pushing his sleeve up a little to check the time on his watch, “i can be there in… roughly half an hour? yes. alright. perfect. see you soon.”

he hangs up with a beep before looking back over at you, “sorry about that! your dress and heels are ready for pick-up. what were you saying before my phone went off?”

“hm?” you clear your throat, “oh! uh… nothing. i was just- you know, small talk. but you can go now if you want to- i mean, obviously you need to go and pick up my outfit for tonight so i’ll just let you go-”

“alright, perfect-” yoongi nods and gets up from his seat, “i shouldn’t take too long but if anything comes up, just call me-” 

“yep! you got it, homie-” you shoot finger guns at yoongi before quickly forcing your arms down and shoving both your hands in between your knees so that they won’t do anything like that again 

your face flushes bright red as soon as the door shuts behind yoongi and a quiet groan slips past your lips before you smack your forehead down on your desk 

jesus

that... was rough, to say the least! 

sure, you fumble over your words whenever you talk to yoongi on a regular basis, but it’s never usually this bad... 

what’s gotten into you today?!

maybe it’s just the pre-party jitters! 

“get it together, y/l/n.” you mutter to yourself, patting your cheeks lightly before pulling your laptop towards you and opening it up 

if there’s anyone who can get you get your shit together, it’s hoseok

Y/N Y/L/N (10:12AM): help me

you perk up when hoseok responds almost immediately, your laptop letting out a little ping! from his message

you have half a mind to scold him for not doing work and being on the company’s messaging system but you dO need to talk to him right now so 

Jung Hoseok (10:12AM): What did you do this time

Y/N Y/L/N (10:12AM): nothing!! idk what’s wrong with my mouth today i’ve never called anyone homie in my entire life 

Jung Hoseok (10:13AM): ?

Y/N Y/L/N (10:13AM): you had to be here to understand :-//

Jung Hoseok (10:13AM): Okay well

Jung Hoseok (10:13AM): I don’t know what I’m supposed to say now

Y/N Y/L/N (10:13AM): can you just come to my office because it’s too much to type out

Y/N Y/L/N (10:13AM): and bring me an iced coffee from the vending machine while you’re at it because yoongi left to pick my dress up

Jung Hoseok (10:14AM): Let me get this straight

Jung Hoseok (10:14AM): You want me to stop working and you want me to go to your office so we can gossip about Yoongi

Y/N Y/L/N (10:14AM): gossip sounds bad

Y/N Y/L/N (10:14AM): ‘discuss’ sounds more professional

Jung Hoseok (10:14AM): …

Jung Hoseok (10:15AM): See you in ten minutes lmao

                                     »»————-　♡　————-««

“you asked him if he was planning on bringing a date to the party?!” hoseok laughs, leaning back against the chair before folding his arms over his chest and shaking his head, “wow. what, are you going to help him plan his wedding too?”

“don’t say that!” you groan, rubbing your fingers against your temples in tight circles, “i was just trying to start a conversation… i don’t know...”

“start a conversation? about what? about encouraging yoongi to be with someone who isn’t you?” 

“keep up the attitude and i’ll reduce your lunch break from one hour and fifteen minutes to one hour and fourteen minutes.” you raise a brow in warning, hoseok gawking before wagging a finger at you 

“i’ll report you to HR for abuse of power!” he jokes, his smile faltering when he notices that you still have that mopey, kicked-in-the-gut look on your face, “okay, think about it this way: this party couldn’t have come at a better time, you know? because now you know exactly what you have to do!” 

“huh? oh, right.” you nod slowly, “yeah, of course i know what i have to do at tonight’s party.” you snort, pulling away from your desk and sitting up straight, “but... you know, just to make sure that you know what it is that i have to do, would you mind telling me what exactly we’re saying i have to do?”

“y/n. come on.” hoseok presses his lips together before leaning forward, “what do people usually do at new year’s eve parties?” he asks gently, in that infuriatingly condescending tone that people usually use when they’re talking to children

“people share their new year’s resolutions with each other?” you hum, thinking back to the new year’s eve party you were at last year where you ended up talking to a very friendly bartender about all the plans you had in mind for the new year 

hm

you can’t help but wonder how he’s doing 

“well, yeah, but not quite what i had in mind-” hoseok shakes his head, “what else do they do?”

“they... sing karaoke really loudly?” you frown before letting out a gasp, “oh no! i didn’t think of that! do you think it’s too late to rent a karaoke machi-”   

“wow, i really have to spoon-feed this to you-” hoseok slaps his hands against his thighs before letting out a huff, “a new year’s kiss, y/n. does that ring any bells?”

“oh, right! i forgot about that part,” you chuckle lightly, tilting your head back against the top of your chair to look up at the ceiling, “but what does that have to do with-” you pause, head snapping back down to look at hoseok with wide eyes, “oh, you’re saying that i should- with yoongi- hoseok, i can barely look at yoongi for five seconds without breaking eye contact-” 

“why not?! its new years! you have to have someone to smooch when it’s midnight. even i have someone to kiss!”

“wait, who are you kiss-” 

“and you know what the best part is?” hoseok grins, “you have an excuse to get super drunk tonight! and a drunk y/n is a slightly more confident y/n-”

“oh, i can’t- i can’t ask him, no.” you chuckle nervously, your hands suddenly feeling a little clammy at the thought of asking yoongi to kiss you, “because then he’s going to feel like he has to kiss me because i’m his boss, and the next thing you know, i’m being called up to HR-” 

“you’re overthinking this again, y/n,” hoseok sighs, “don’t forget the fact that i caught him checking you out at the halloween party. you have to admit that he’s slightly interested in you.”

“that’s different!” you argue, your brows furrowing, “i was dressed as a sexy friggin’ bunny, for god’s sake!”

“and tonight, you’ll be dressed as a sexy friggin’ boss! the only difference is that you won’t have a little cotton tail and two bunny ears-”

“i don’t know…”

hoseok rolls his eyes at your doubt and resists the urge to get up and slap you across the face to get you to come to your senses

you can’t expect anything to happen between you and yoongi if you’re not willing to do something about it in the first place

he can’t even list out how many times you guys have had similar conversations that always end in you chickening out and changing your mind

you were supposed to make a move at the halloween party but you ended up bailing on the plan at the last minute and hoseok had to listen to half an hour of you whining about it over the phone 

he adores you but sometimes he just wants to grab you and yell at you for being such a wimp when it comes to yoongi 

“okay, you know what? forget yoongi. i’ll be your new year’s kiss!” hoseok teases, leaning forward before wiggling his eyebrows enticingly, “maybe if people see me canoodling with the boss i’ll finally get the street cred i deserve-”

“you know, i don’t know if i’ve reached that level of desperation quite yet-”

“i’m a great kisser, so it’s your loss...” hoseok kisses his teeth, raising his hands in defense, “anyways, just try not to overthink it. take a deep breath, relax, and hopefully you won’t point any more lame finger guns at yoo-”

“-ooou’re fired!” you stand up and slam your fist down on the desk the moment yoongi steps into the room, hoseok jolting at the sudden announcement, “you are fired, my good sir! you heard me loud and clear!” 

yoongi’s eyes widen slightly and he presses his lips together before stepping aside and lowering his head  

“what the hell are yo-” hoseok glances over his shoulder and it dawns over him when he spots yoongi standing by the door, “oh! oh. uh, okay. yes... i am... devastated...” he clears his throat as he rises from the chair slowly, “please... give me a second chance? i... won’t do it again?” 

you blink, pulling down your blazer slightly before giving him a curt nod

“...okay, but this is your last chance. next time, you’re really fired.” you clear your throat, sitting back down before gesturing towards the door, “you may leave now, mr. jung.” 

yoongi nods in acknowledgement when hoseok walks past him and he waits a couple of seconds before speaking up 

“sorry. i didn’t realize you were busy because the door wasn’t closed all the way.” he smiles sheepishly, raising the garment bag in his hand, “i just wanted to put your dress in the closet for you.” 

“yes! go ahead.” you smile, gesturing towards the closet before sitting back down in your chair 

“by the way, i passed by that breakfast place on the way to the laundromat-” yoongi pauses, glancing over at you on his way to the closet, “you know, the place that makes those BLT bagels you like so much?” 

“ooh, with the spicy mayo and the avocado?”

“mhm-” yoongi smiles, shutting the closet door gently and turning to face you, “they do chocolate chip waffles now and i thought maybe that’d be something you’d be interested in for future breakfasts.” 

“oh, no way!” your eyes widen in excitement, “i’m very interested in chocolate chip waffles for future breakfasts!”

“that’s what i thought.” he chuckles, making his way back towards the doors, “anyway- i’ll be out there if you need me, boss.” 

“mhm!” 

you immediately get up from your chair as soon as yoongi leaves the room 

you told yourself that you were going to wait until tonight but you’ve been thinking about your dress all week and you wanna see it now!! 

“dress, dress, dress-” you murmur to yourself like a maniac, your heels clicking against the floor as you jog over to the closet 

you push down a squeal of excitement after unzipping the garment bag and getting a good look at your outfit for tonight

you spent hours searching for the perfect dress and it was totally worth it now that you’re looking at it  

it’s a navy blue midi-length dress that sort of cinches in at the waist but the skirt itself is relaxed so you don’t need to worry about your legs being constricted 

there’s also a high slit in the skirt which is exciting (you had to shave your legs yesterday which wasn’t as exciting) 

and it’s a long sleeve dress but the sleeves and sheer and billowy but cap around your wrists 

it’s classy but also a little sexy but not like your halloween playboy costume level of sexy

you’re still not sure what possessed you to dress up as a playboy bunny but even you have to admit that that little black dress looked great on you 

you zip the bag back up before pushing it aside to sneak a peek at the suit that yoongi will be wearing to the party 

he asked if he could keep his suit in your closet and obviously you said yes because it’s yoongi 

your eyes light up when you notice something peculiar about his outfit 

it’s navy blue as well!! 

the corners of your mouth lift in a wide grin, your heart skipping a beat at the thought of you and yoongi (unintentionally, but still) wearing matching colours tonight 

heh 

                                    »»————-　♡　————-««

“c’mon, stupid thing...” yoongi frowns to himself as he struggles to tie his tie

he’s been at it for the last ten minutes and it seems like his gummy worm fingers aren’t going to be useful anytime soon 

and it probably doesn’t help that he’s using his phone camera as a mirror instead of going to the bathroom to use the actual mirror

he doesn’t know if it showed this morning but he’s been a nervous wreck all day! 

he practically zipped out of your office as soon as he had the chance to and he just hopes that you’re not suspecting anything 

it’s just that as each day goes by, he gets more and more conflicted over what to do about his feelings for you 

this wasn’t supposed to happen!

when he first realized that you liked him, he was flattered and admittedly it was a nice stroke to his ego knowing that his boss was interested in him, but he didn’t know it’d turn into this 

he didn’t know he’d end up liking you back 

this is a disaster! 

he’s not supposed to like you back!

he already tried forcing himself to stop liking you but if anything it’s made things worse

he thought your schoolgirl crush was sweet at first and then one day he found your poor excuse of asking him to stay after hours to help you re-organize your pens was cute and ever since then it’s gone downhill 

like the other day when he was eating lunch with you - you took the paper sleeve that holds the chopsticks and you folded it into a makeshift chopstick rest and gave it to him to use and,,. he’d have to be crazy to not find that wildly endearing

yoongi lets out a huff and leans back against his chair as he looks at himself on his phone screen 

“good going, moron.” he grumbles to himself before lifting his hand and flipping himself off, “you and your feelings.”

of course, it’s not technically a... bad thing that he likes you back, right? 

...but what’s everyone going to think?

he knows that he’s on the list of people getting the christmas bonus (because he helped you type it out) but what if people think he just slept his way to the money?? 

oh, god

that’s not who he is!

this is too much to think about right now 

he just had this suit pressed and he’s not about to ruin it by nervously sweating in it 

he’s just going to enjoy this party with you and then deal with his feelings later!  

future yoongi can handle it

present yoongi is just going to enjoy the ride B-) 

“whatcha up to?” 

“-!” yoongi jumps and scrambles up from his seat when he hears your voice all of a sudden, “y/n! sorry, i didn’t hear you come out of... your... office...” he trails off, voice softening slightly as he takes in how beautiful you look in your dress 

obviously he already knew what you were going to wear because he was the one who picked up your outfit from the dry cleaner’s but... it’s a different experience actually seeing you in it 

beautiful 

there’s really no other way to describe it

you look... beautiful. 

“i don’t know why on earth you’re wearing a tie to a party.” you snort, eyes flicking down to the tie hanging loosely around his neck, “this isn’t a business meeting, yoongi.” (you decided it’d be best to take hoseok’s advice. no overthinking - just relaxing! and it seems to be going well...) 

“oh.” yoongi snaps himself out of his daze before shaking his head, “i… i don’t know why, either. i guess i’m just used to wearing a tie.”

“well, i say ditch it - you know, let loose a little! it’s new year’s eve, after all.” 

before yoongi even knows it, you’re stepping towards him and sliding the tie from his neck in one swift movement before tossing it onto his desk

ᵒ ᵍᵒᵈ

you even smell pretty 

he freezes when you reach up to undo a couple of buttons on his shirt, his hands gripping the edge of his desk so tightly that his knuckles are stark white 

“there we go!” you smile, fixing yoongi’s collar before nodding to yourself, “much better. also, do you think you can help me with my heels? i put them on already but the little buckles are flimsy and i can’t do them because of my nails.” you raise both your hands before wiggling your fingers 

“mhm, of course.” yoongi steps aside and gestures towards his chair, “take a seat and i’ll take care of them for you.”

yoongi’s chair squeaks slightly as you sit down on it and you make a mental note to get him a new one 

...maybe you should get everyone in the office new chairs to make your crush on yoongi less obvious

hm

lots to think about

“so, do you think anyone’s going to have fun tonight?” you ask quietly, leaning back against the chair, “i’m nervous.” 

“i’m sure everyone’s going to have fun, y/n,” yoongi lowers himself onto the ground so that he’s down on one knee before raising your leg so that your foot is pressed against his chest, “they get free food, free alcohol, and there are fun 2021 party hats and stupid 2021 glasses to match. what’s not to love?”

“me. i’m the part they don’t love.” you snort, propping your elbow up on yoongi’s desk before leaning against your fist, “i’m gonna take one step onto the rooftop and immediately ruin the party somehow. i bet the dj will stop playing music and his records will make that awkward scratchy sound.”

“don’t be so harsh on yourself…” yoongi scolds, tucking the thin strap into the buckle and giving it a little tug to make sure it’s nice and secure before lowering your foot gently, “besides, if anyone looks at you weirdly, i can just call security and have them escorted out of the party.” he tuts, smiling up at you as he lifts your other foot 

“ooh. careful, secretary min… i might have to give you a raise if you keep sweet-talking me like that.” you joke, pushing the ball of your foot gently against yoongi’s chest teasingly

“oh, yeah? i wouldn’t be opposed to that, boss…” the corner of yoongi’s mouth twitches in a side smirk as he slips the other strap into place, “alright, there we go! heels are nice and secure.”

he gets up from the ground, dusting his knee off before extending his hand to help you get up from his chair, “ready?” 

“as ready as i’ll ever be...” you reach for his hand only to pause, your nose scrunching slightly as you pull away, “i don’t know. let’s think this through. do we have to go to the party?”

“well, you are the host.” yoongi points out, “and i planned the whole thing! do you know how hard it was to arrange for a karaoke machine on new year’s eve?” he frowns playfully, “you can’t bail on me like this.” 

“i guess...” 

“listen- whenever you want to leave, just let me know and i’ll grab the entire plate of sliders, a crisp bottle of champagne, and then we’ll head back down here to eat, drink, and watch the fireworks from your office window.” yoongi tilts his head, his hand still out for you to take, “deal?” 

“...throw in the chocolate lava cakes as well and we have a deal.” 

                                   »»————-　♡　————-««

“wow! you really outdid yourself, yoongi.” you nod in approval as you look around, “look at this place!” 

you never even knew the rooftop had the ability to look like some trendy upscale bar that sells cocktails for $30 each 

“hey, if this secretary thing doesn’t work out, maybe i could become a party planner.” yoongi jokes, lifting his glass up with a smile

“you know, i really think you could.” you clink your glass against his before taking a sip of the bubbly champagne, “by the way, you don’t have to hang out with me all night. you’re allowed to go and mingle with your coworkers.” 

“i know.” yoongi hums before his nose scrunches slightly, “but every time i talk to them, they’re always gossiping about something and i think gossiping is unproductive.” 

“wha-” you gawk, your lashes fluttering, “you’re telling me that you’ve had access to juicy office gossip this whole time and not once have i ever heard any of it??”

“i mean...” 

“you have to tell me something. i’ll take anything!” 

you grin excitedly when yoongi gestures for you to come in closer 

“jungkook and tzuyu had sex on the photocopier by the supplies room.” he blurts out quickly, clearing his throat before taking a sip of his own champagne, “but you didn’t hear it from me!”

“they- what?!” you gasp in shock, jaw practically dropping to the floor, “they did?? during work??”

“no, it was after work!” yoongi shakes his head, “i think you had a meeting across town that night which is why we weren’t here... otherwise we... probably would’ve heard it but- it’s on the CCTV security cameras and everything. of course, since the photocopier is kind of out of frame, you can only see their lower halves-”

“well, then how do you know it was jungkook and tzuyu??” 

“their shoes! and jungkook’s socks. he’s the only one who wears bright purple rubber-duckie socks to work.” 

the two of you turn to look at jungkook across the rooftop and you blink before looking back over at yoongi with a pout 

“that’s my favourite photocopier.” you mutter, “i hope they didn’t get any... fluids inside of it-”

“gross! why would it be inside of the machine?!”

“i don’t know! people go crazy during sex sometimes!” you raise your hands in defense before clearing your throat quietly, “okay, but seriously, i feel like having vigorous sex on a piece of office equipment is definitely violating something so i might have to bring them in for a little chat-”

“ooh, can i be there when you scold them?” 

“absolutely-”  

“miss y/n?” you jump in surprise when someone taps your shoulder gently from behind

you glance over your shoulder to see joy before smiling politely, turning around fully to face her, “joy! what’s up?”

“i’d like to talk to you about something, if that’s alright - do you have a moment?” 

“oh! um, of course-” you pause, turning to hand yoongi your glass, “let’s head over there for some privacy. what’s on your mind?” 

“it’s just... you know, regarding past comments i may or may not have made about you-” she chuckles uneasily, “seeing as you still have to figure out who’s getting christmas bonuses this year, i thought that-” 

yoongi bites back a grin when you turn back to look at him with pleading eyes and he shrugs helplessly before raising his own glass at you and downing the rest of the champagne 

                                  »»————-　♡　————-««

yoongi’s never been a huge fan of parties mainly because he’d much rather enjoy a bottle of champagne and full-sized burgers in the comfort of his own home 

he really only started going to parties once you became CEO of the company and he wasn’t left with a choice because he was worried that you’d fire him if he didn’t attend any of these festive celebrations 

he likes to think that you’ve opened him up to new experiences, helping him become a better human being overall 

:-) 

“hey!” yoongi chokes on his tiny burger patty when someone gives his back a hearty slap, “i’ve been looking for you everywhere! i have a bone to pick with you, min yoongi.”

yoongi’s brows furrow in confusion when it’s hoseok that plops down on the bar stool next to him 

“what-” yoongi swallows his bite before giving his chest a couple of pats to help get the masticated chunks of meat down smoother, “what did i do??” 

hoseok opens his mouth to say something before pausing, eyes flickering to the side as he reconsiders what he’s about to say 

he’s a little tipsy thanks to the open bar so he didn’t really think this decision through but he’s here now so it’s a little late to back out 

you explicitly asked him not to meddle but he feels like if he doesn’t do anything, then you’ll never do anything and you’ll just go to the grave keeping your feelings for yoongi a secret 

does this count as meddling? 

he just has to find a way to steer the conversation towards the topic of you and yoongi and romance 

this might be meddling, now that he’s thinking about it

...

it’s fine! 

he’ll do it in such a subtle way that yoongi won’t even notice! 

“it’s not something that you’ve done. it’s something that you haven’t done.” hoseok clears his throat, narrowing his eyes at yoongi suspiciously, “do you like y/n? because she likes you.”

(not very subtle, but hoseok never likes to beat around the bush.) 

“woah-” yoongi’s eyes widen in surprise and he lets out a nervous chuckle before looking around, “ha, i- um- where did you get that idea from?” 

“you didn’t deny it.” hoseok grins in success, “so you do?” 

“i...” yoongi pokes his tongue against the inside of his cheek before he lets out a huff and his shoulders droop in defeat, “yeah. yeah, i do. ...but what does that have to do with you?” 

“oh, it has everything to do with me!” hoseok chirps, clapping his hands together excitedly, “i’m here to give you advice!” 

“yeah, okay,” yoongi immediately scoffs and rolls his eyes as he turns back to pick up his drink, “no offense, but i don’t think i should be getting advice from the guy who was almost fired today-”

“oh, please, i wasn’t getting fired when you walked in.” hoseok raises a brow, “we were talking about you before you barged in so y/n obviously panicked and changed the subject to make it look like she wasn’t going all goo-goo-ga-ga over you-” 

“what? you were- y/n was talking about me?” yoongi perks up, his interest in the conversation suddenly reigniting, “really?” 

“she’s always talking about you,” hoseok points out, “don’t get me wrong - i love going to her office to talk about you instead of doing my work, but it’s exhausting! which is part of the reason as to why i’m willing to give you advice to get this show on the road.” 

“i don’t need advice, though.” 

“of course you need advice. if one of you finally made a move, i wouldn’t need to give you advice, but here i am.” hoseok gestures to himself before shrugging, “so... what’s wrong with you?”

yoongi scoffs in offense

that’s a little ruDE

“what’s wrong with me?”

“yeah. why haven’t you made a move yet if you like y/n back?” hoseok emphasizes as a reminder that this crush goes two ways and that yoongi can be blamed for the lack of action just as much as you 

“because... i can’t! it’s not that easy, man.” yoongi shakes his head, “i can’t just ask her out. she’s... like... she’s miss y/n.” 

“yes. and the sky is blue.” hoseok frowns, “i’m sorry, what’s the problem?” 

“she’s the boss!” yoongi snaps, glaring over at hoseok, “she’s our boss!”

“exactly! she’s the boss! if you’re going to date someone in the office, it might as well be the person signing off everyone’s paycheques at the end of each month-” 

“but you can’t- the rules!”

“what rules??”

“there are no rules! that’s why i’m so confused! i’m used to rules! that’s how the world works in my head! what the hell am i supposed to do now? go rogue?! i’ve never gone rogue before!”

“oh, god, who do you think you are? some secret agent? all you’re doing is asking someone out-”

“i can’t date y/n-” 

“give me a legitimate reason as to why you can’t date y/n.”

“i’ll be penalized!” 

“who’s going to penalize you?!”

“the boss of our boss!” 

“please!” hoseok groans loudly, throwing his head back in frustration, “you don’t think he’s goofed around with any of his secretaries?”

“okay, but this isn’t me goofing around with y/n, this is me... being serious with y/n!” yoongi presses his lips together, unsure of what to say next, “yeah. i wanna be serious with y/n.” 

“i promise you that no one cares about relationships as long as work is handed in on time and bags of money are being made.” hoseok hums, gesturing for the bartender to fix up another drink for him 

having this conversation about you with yoongi is just as exhausting as having this conversation about yoongi with you 

...

he doesn’t know if that sentence made any sense but all this alcohol is making the words jumble up together 

“well, okay, but-” yoongi chuckles nervously, turning and setting his glass down on the bar countertop, “then we’d have to make a file with HR declaring the status of our relationship, and then we’d have to talk about whether or not we want to keep things private or let the whole office know- oh, god, and what if it doesn’t work out? what if we break up? it’d be embarrassing after having declared our love for each other in front of everyone! and favouritism! don’t even get me started on favouritism! people are going to bag on y/n if they find out that i’m on the list of people getting a bonus! ...but, in my defense, even if we weren’t together i would probably still be on that list because i’m hardworking-” 

“yoongi-” hoseok interrupts, slapping both his hands down on his shoulders before letting out a sigh, “do you like y/n?” 

“yes.” yoongi answers without missing a beat, “i like y/n. a lot.” 

“okay. then that’s all that matters, right?” 

yoongi opens his mouth to respond but he pauses

huh 

that... is a fair point... 

it shouldn’t matter what anyone else thinks about his relationship with you 

what is it about alcohol that makes some people so wise?

“do you know what kind of a person you’d be if you just repressed your feelings and pretended that they didn’t exist at all? a coward, that’s what you’d be. because y/n is a fantastic woman and you need to hurry up and make a damn move before she realises she’s wasting her time on you and moves on to someone else who isn’t afraid to show their true feelings for her.” hoseok shakes his head gently before pulling away from yoongi with a nonchalant shrug and a snort, “but, you know - i’m drunk as hell and i’ve had nothing to eat so all the things coming out of my mouth righ’now could be complete and utter bullshit!” he hiccups, giggling to himself, “who knows!”

“well… what do you suggest i do?”

“what else do you do at a new year’s eve party?” hoseok’s head flops to the side, the over consumption of nothing but champagne suddenly hitting him like a brick wall 

“…share new year’s resolutions?”

“wha- god, you guys are truly the perfect pair- no, dumbass, you kiiissss someone at midnight.” hoseok slurs, “you already know she’s into you. and now i know that you’re into her so she’s definitely not going to oppose giving you a big ol smooch!”

“well, it’s-” yoongi pulls his sleeve up to check his watch, anxiety bubbling in his stomach when he realizes there are exactly twelve minutes to midnight, “oh, god.” 

okay

that’s fine!

it’s fine, he can work with twelve minutes!

all he has to do is 1) find you, 2) start a casual conversation, 3) somehow transition the casual conversation into a not so casual conversation about his feelings for you, 4) transition from the not so casual conversation to asking if you’d like to be his new year’s kiss, 5)- 

“i can’t pull this off in twelve minutes. i don’t know how i’m going to do this!” yoongi swallows thickly, turning to look at hoseok (who’s starting to doze off), “how the hell am i going to do this??” 

hoseok picks himself up off the counter, turning to face yoongi before a wide smile spreads on his face and a little gasp of excitement slips past his lips, “hey! i’ve been looking for you everywhere. i have a bone to pick with you, min yoongi-” 

“okay, buddy-” yoongi quickly reaches out to keep hoseok from toppling over, “you’ve definitely had one too many-” 

                                  »»————-　♡　————-««

ding!

yoongi steps off the elevator with a huff, quickly checking the time on his watch for the millionth time tonight 

he spent two minutes running around the rooftop like a headless chicken in case you were still up there somewhere 

luckily jungkook told him that he saw you leave the rooftop and there’s really only one other place that you’d be 

he makes his way down the hallway towards the double doors of your office, smiling in success when he sees that one of the doors is slightly ajar 

bingo! 

maybe it’s because he’s now confident about his true feelings for you, but he feels like there’s a spring in his step right now! 

(it could also be because of the liquid courage, but that’s neither here nor there.)

he pushes the door open a little to stick his face in, giving himself a mental high five as he sees you leaning against your desk with a flute of champagne in your hand, staring out the window 

“hey!” yoongi clears his throat, knocking on the door gently, “there you are.”

“hm?” you turn to glance over your shoulder, “oh, yoongi! yeah, hey.” 

“i didn’t realize you’d disappeared... i would’ve brought the sliders with me if i knew you were in here.” he jokes, shutting the door behind him with a quiet click, “everything okay?”

“ah, well. maybe next time.” you smile stiffly, turning away from him to look back out, “yeah, everything’s fine. joy practically talked my ear off up there so i just felt like i needed to get away from the party for a little while.” 

“you know, the fireworks are starting soon...” yoongi points out as he makes his way over to you, “you’re probably going to get better pictures of them up there than down here in your office.” 

“yeah, i know… but it’s also going to be very loud up on the rooftop and i’d prefer to start the new year off with working eardrums.” your nose wrinkles as you let out a chuckle, “also, i…”

“what?”

“i… i don’t know, i just don’t really want to start the new year awkwardly standing in the middle while everyone else is getting new year’s kisses.” you reach up to scratch the back of your neck before chuckling awkwardly, “that… makes me sound like a very bitter single person and i swear it wasn’t supposed to come off that way-” 

“no, i totally get it.” yoongi shakes his head as he wipes his hands on the side of his pants, “as a matter of fact, i kind of wanted to talk to you about something-”

“hold on, hold on- before you say anything, i-” you interrupt him, turning to set your glass down, “i, um- i have something that i wanna say to you as well. can i go first?”

“oh! yes, okay….” yoongi cowers down a little, pressing his lips together tightly, “is... everything alright?”

“yeah!” you nod quickly before pausing, “i mean, sort of. kind of. i’m… not sure if it’s going to be a good idea or not, but i just want to let you know that if you… you know, if you feel uncomfortable or something after i tell you this, you’re free to pack up and leave, you know? i mean, i actually already have a letter of recommendation written for you so if you wanna go off and work for someone else, i’ve already put in a lot of good words for you-”

“woah, woah-” yoongi raises his hands before letting out a chuckle, “i- while i definitely appreciate the gesture, you know i’m… not planning on going anywhere, right?”

“yeah, well… things change!” you clear your throat, gaze averting as you reach up to scratch the back of your neck, “things... change. i… don’t mean to sound so elementary school about it, but i…” you trail off, the little voice in the back of your head reminding you that this is your last chance to back out and not tell yoongi about your feelings for him

you’ve chickened out more than a handful of times, so what’s going to different about this time around?

you look up at yoongi and he blinks twice before offering you a soft smile, “you…?”

oh 

how are you supposed to back out when he’s looking at you like that?

and maybe it’s just because he looks particularly handsome tonight in his suit or because you’re all riled up on cocktails, but...

“i like you.” you blurt out, trying your best not to cringe or make any faces, “like… in a… romantic? way?”

yoongi’s eyes widen and the smile fades from his face, though you don’t have much time to process whatever reaction that was before he’s speaking up 

“you like me.” yoongi repeats, swallowing thickly before nodding, “in a romantic way.”

“yeah.” you shrug, “and i have for a while, but i just never said or did anything about it because i thought it was inappropriate - you know, because i’m your boss and around the time i started liking you was when we held that seminar for workplace harassment and i didn’t want to make you feel like i was harassing you or creeping on you or anything - a-anyways, at first i thought i was attracted to you solely because you’re hot in that broody, college skater-boyfriend kind of way and i thought it’d go away on its own, but then the feelings never went away, and then i thought that maybe this was just a more serious schoolgirl-type crush that would take time to go away, but then a lot of time went by and it still didn’t go away, so… here we are now, at the end of the year, and i… still have a huge, huge crush on you-”

“-i like you too.” 

“okay, cool, but i’m not done talking about-” you pause, your eyes flickering upwards, “wait, what?” 

“i like you, y/n.” yoongi breathes out with a smile, his shoulders visibly relaxing, “actually, i’ve known for a long time that you liked me and at first i was just flattered and admittedly i was a little cocky about it but then i... actually started to like you one day and- well, i didn’t want to say anything because- woah-!”

yoongi yelps when suddenly a paperweight is hurled in his direction and nearly whacks him in the face, “what the f-”

“are you kidding me, yoongi?!” you snap, slapping your hands down as you glare at him across your desk, “are you kidding me?!” 

“okay, i-i-” yoongi stammers, “i wasn’t expecting this reaction so i’m not entirely sure how i’m supposed to-” 

“you knew that i liked you this entire time-” you groan, reaching up to pinch the bridge of your nose, “and you knew that you liked me this entire time... and you didn’t say or do anything about it?!”

“well, why didn’t you do anything about it first?” yoongi exasperates, “you- you’re just as much at fault here as i am!”

“because i-” you laugh lightly in disbelief, “because i thought that if i told you that i liked you, that you would feel pressured into saying that you liked me back because i’m your boss! how would i know if your feelings were genuine or if you were just playing along? of course i couldn’t tell you!” 

yoongi chews on the inside of his cheek anxiously as you let out a huff before stepping away from your desk and heading over to stand by the window again 

“i...” he trails off, bending down to pick up the paperweight before setting it down on your desk gently, “i’m sorry that you... struggled with that... but... i think the important thing is that i do like you, y/n. i genuinely like you, and i was an idiot for not saying anything earlier... i let my doubts get in the way and...” he sighs, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck, “i’m not good at- i’m not good at dealing with this kind of stuff and usually i just brush it aside and hope the problem goes away but i see you almost every single day so i couldn’t just brush it aside-” 

“yeah, well-” 

both of you freeze up when you suddenly hear the countdown chanting echo from up on the rooftop and yoongi feels his heart plummet to his stomach when he realizes he didn’t even ask if you wanted to be his new year’s kiss 

shit 

shit!

“i’m just-” yoongi shakes his head furiously, “i get nervous when there are no rules and there certainly isn’t a handbook for what to do when you’re attracted to your boss-”

10!

you let out a scoff as you turn to face him, “-and you think there’s a handbook for what to do when you’re attracted to your secretary?!-” 

9!

“i was a total coward for not saying anything sooner and i wish i did! i wish i kissed you at the halloween party!”

8!

“you- you wanted to kiss me at the halloween party?” 

7!

“of course i did, dumbass!” the name slips out of yoongi’s mouth before he even realizes it and he smiles sheepishly when you give him a warning look, “...miss dumbass.”

6!

“anyways,” yoongi coughs, “i-if you’re still interested, i’d really like to kiss you tonight if that’s okay-” 

5!

“wait, did hoseok put you up to this?” you narrow your eyes in suspicion before pointing to yourself, “because he told me to ask you to kiss me tonight-”

“yeah, he put me up to this because we both know that you certainly weren’t going to make the first move-”

4!

“how dare you?” you scoff, crossing your arms stubbornly, “i could make the first move if i really wanted to-” 

3!

“what?! that’s bullsh- oh my god, can we agree now to kiss first and then argue about this later?!” yoongi snaps, eyes full of panic at the thought of not making it on time, “please??” 

2!

“fine, but-” 

1- HAPPY NEW YEAR! 

you don’t get a chance to say anything else before yoongi swoops in swiftly to lean in and kiss you, warm hands quickly reaching up to cup either sides of your face 

the sound of people cheering and fireworks going off in the sky is nothing compared to the erratic thumping of your heart and the high-pitched ringing in your ears 

oh, wow

your lashes flutter as you feel yourself relax, your fists uncurling against yoongi so that your hands rest on his chest

you can feel his rapid heartbeat through his shirt and that’s all the confirmation you need to know that yoongi really, truly likes you back 

yoongi’s hands leave your face so that he can reach down to grasp your hips and pull you towards him, only for his arms to snake around your waist a second later 

your hands slide up his chest before your arms wrap loosely around his neck, feeling as though nothing else matters except what’s happening right now 

you’ve dreamt about this moment for so long but it’s so much better than you could’ve possibly imagined it to be 

and you’re not sure if it’s the copious amount of champagne that you consumed tonight but you just feel so warm inside 

yoongi pulls away (far too soon for your liking), his eyes lidded and hazy as he smiles fondly down at you, “happy new year, boss.”

you can’t fight back the wide grin on your face when he leans down to nudge his nose against yours, both of your hearts undoubtedly beating in time   

“happy new year, secretary min.”

❄️christmas with cee 2020 masterlist 🎄

help me help you make your wishes come tru (aka send me a request)

why don’t you explore the rest of the library while you’re here?

or perhaps you want something shorter to read?

[my-writings-and-musings]

I have another lovely commission to share! This one is a sequel to the last, with the Brave Police spending more time on the Lost Light to answer questions, and it's just as precious in my opinion!

"Now, now, there's room for everyone. Single file please!"

Ultra Magnus thankfully had ample experience and skill getting his voice to fill the entire classroom, and so the crowd was able to take their seats in a mostly organized fashion at last, filling up the entire room from back to front in short order. Scarcely a single bot on the ship wasn't present for the day's presentation, and one glance at the tightly packed rows of tables made that obvious. No one wanted to miss the long awaited event.

At the head of the classroom, Ultra Magnus murmured about the ill manners being displayed to their guests before nodding at the bots in question. Sitting in their own row at the raised stage, the Brave Police looked like a full representation of all the reactions possible for the center of attention. Some were happy, others flustered, and a few quite casual about all the fuss. Deckerd, ever the responsible leader, held his small collection of notes tightly as he nodded in return to the much bigger bot. Rodimus took that as his cue to hop on stage.

With a single whistle, the captain reduced the fog of chatter to absolute silence, something he took with a proud smile before speaking. 

"Alright, everybot, you know the drill! The Brave Police have been kind enough to agree to this little Q and A panel, so let's show them the proper courtesy while they're up here." he announced happily, looking about the crowd and lingering his optics on a few potentially troublesome bots in particular. Making sure to use his Captain voice, he leveled a serious look at each as he issued his warning. "That means no talking unless you get called, and no hogging the mic when it's your turn."

"Discipline will be administered if anyone breaks these rules." Ultra Magnus said, finalizing the warning with an undeniably serious threat. Beyond a few nervous glances, the room remained frozen in total silence after the big bot went back to his dutiful watch. No one present would dare risk incurring the wrath of Ultra Magnus, not even for the questions that they wanted answered more than anything. 

"Sooo…" Rodimus interjected, taking back the stage briefly to try and bring some life back into the event. Gesturing to the main guests, he gave the best parting warm up he could before stepping off the stage. "Without further ado, I'm going to give the show over to them. All yours, Deckerd!"

Clearing his throat politely, the police cruiser stood up on his spot, briefly taking hold of the rim on his hat-like helm accent as he often did when nervous. Taking hold of his notes, he spoke up with the somewhat ineffectual tone of a practiced but uncom public speaker.

"To start, we would all like to offer our thanks! For everything you've done, and for allowing us this opportunity, you have our deepest gratitude." the well mannered bot said humbly, briefly glancing at Rodimus for a flash of pointed thanks before returning to his notes. The captain couldn't help but puff up a little, quite proud of his suggestion all over again, but he was otherwise still and silent as he watched. 

"Now, I understand you have many questions, and we are happy to answer them as a group or individuals." he explained, looking to his teammates for group confirmation. Each gave some form of assent, ranging from Duke's proper and stiff nod to Gunmax putting his pedes on the table with a vague gesture of agreement. Deckerd merely narrowed his optics for an instant before returning his smile to the crowd. "Through the system, I will begin the process of selection!"

A button on the desk, intended as a method of selecting students to answer questions, was activated. Every bot froze in anticipation that they might be selected first, with each hoping they might be the lucky winner. Magnus had mandated the algorithm select at random to prevent any cries of unfair choice for good reason…

So of course it was quite fitting that Whirl of all bots get the first question.

A group groan was cut off by another Magnus stare, yet the orderly mech was clearly beyond apprehensive at the possible chaos about to unfold. Uncaring of the tension his selection created for the crew, Whirl merely cleared his vents and stood up with obvious purpose, having planned his potential query well in advance of the moment. Looking to the bots on stage, his optic betrayed little emotion as he spoke. "So uh, were you guys actually built by humans? From scratch? Processor and all?"

There was an immediate cringe amongst the entire crew, as the question was immeasurably rude by Cybertronian standards, but the Brave Police didn't flinch. 

"Yes!" Deckerd replied happily, completely unaffected by the cultural faux pas he'd just had directed his way. "Each of us was constructed by the Japanese police force, starting with myself."

"Except for Duke, he was made by the Scotland Yard." McCrane specified, drawing attention to the brightly colored and reserved mech at the end. The attention actually seemed to fluster Duke, who flashed an expression of surprise to be singled out before dropping his gaze and quietly confirming the fact.

"That is correct."

There was a moment of mixed murmuring amongst the crowd, with Whirl looking satisfied to have gotten his answer along with getting the ball rolling, and he sat down to allow the next bot a turn. It took just as little time for the next selection to occur as the first. 

"How recently was that, exactly?" Swerve said, looking confused but happy to be the central figure of the moment. It was a much less disrespectful question by Cybertronian standards than the first, and the bots on stage appeared equally content to answer it.

"As of this date, it has been four years and five months since my activation." Deckerd replied casually, unintentionally sending a wave of disbelief through the entire room. This mature, well rounded bot was barely more than a protoform?! 

"We were constructed seven months later." McCrane said, speaking for the Build Team with a gesture that only deepened the shock in the room. Deckerd was young even by human standards, yet he was still the oldest one on the team? How young was the newest among them?

"Shadow Maru was next, by about a year, then six months later I joined up!" Drill Boy declared loudly, loving the surprise each answer drew from the crowd. Gunmax, equally a fan of stirring things up, smirked confidently as he leaned back in his chair. 

"I haven't even been kicking around for a year." he declared smugly, adding to the shock of the bots several times over. Sure, Cybertronians were ready to go in mere hours, but no one had been born in so long… to be confronted by a mechanical being so young was nearly unfathomable. Not to mention that the oldest among them was still so inexperienced! A fresh wave of hushed gossip washed over those assembled, only to fade out into silent anticipation as the next opportunity for a question presented itself.

"What kind of criminals are you fighting? Most of the time, anyway." a bot in back asked, making the Brave Police perk up as a group. Like anyone, the opportunity to retell their adventures was hardly one they'd ever pass up, and even the humble Deckerd was a little boastful as he set up their panel to reply.

"Our division is uniquely suited to handle threats too powerful for humans to safely combat. The criminals we face have a multitude of motives, and it is not uncommon for us to face creatures designed to cause maximum destruction. I will allow my team to recount some of these events in greater detail." he said, opening up the discussion with a smile and a nod. There was a shift in the classroom as if every being leaned forward at once in anticipation.

"The underground bug people were my first mission!" Drill Boy announced proudly, unintentionally creating far more questions than he could have ever hoped to answer in a single sentence. Gobsmacked expressions were shared all through the crew, even by Ultra Magnus and Rodimus at the front. While they'd figured their new friends got into some wild adventures, like themselves, there was clearly so much more to the group than they'd let on… 

"There was a giant moth one time." Dumpson recalled thoughtfully, only adding fuel to the fire with his calm expression of thoughtful recollection.

"Don't forget the giant panda." McCrane said helpfully, the tiniest hint of a smile hinting that he was perfectly well aware of the reactions they were getting. Rodimus had to admire the skillful stirring of the pot. Some bots were taking notes now, especially as the list continued to grow and the Brave Police grew no less unpredictable in their retellings. Brief tidbits about mind control, ghosts, aliens and cults were undoubtedly going to spawn some incredible conversations at Swerve's later on.

Drill Boy finished the segment with a beaming smile. "Without the Boss, I don't think we'd have been able to catch that brainwashing nun!"

While every single adventure would have probably called for a panel of questions in its own right, that statement alone made for an excellent segway into something every single Lost Light bot had been curious about, and the moment the next bot was selected they said what everyone was thinking. "Who's this "Boss" we keep hearing about? Are they a bot like you?"

"Our Boss Yuuta Tomonaga is a human boy, and the first being I ever met. He became my first and most trusted companion." Deckerd replied, smiling affectionately at the description. It had been clear from the onset he cared deeply for his mysterious "Boss", yet most had assumed them to be something like an Amica, or perhaps an older mentor bot. To hear they were a human, and one that sounded exceptionally young at that…? Deckerd recognized the confusion, and while obviously a little bashful to be so open, he was more than happy to talk about the achievements of his dearest friend. "I owe him my life, several times over."

"Many of us have gained human friendships." Power Joe said helpfully, taking some of the pressure off their leader and bringing the attention to himself. Not missing the opportunity to brag, he gestured proudly to himself. "I've befriended many of Yuuta's classmates, they see me as a superhero!"

"Yuuta's sisters are compatriots of mine." Shadow Maru said in a polite and subtle one up, setting the stage for the others to continue naming their friends. 

"Hmph, I'm the only one besides Deckerd to have called Yuuta by his first name." Drill Boy bragged.

"Colonel Seia has taught me much through our professional relationship." McCrane said calmly, returning the focus to one of individual bonds over boasting. Unfortunately, Dumpson chuckled and quickly took aim at the comment.

"Are you sure it's entirely professional?"

McCrane froze for a second, optics widening and face flushing, before he calmly folded his hands on the table and replied. "I could say the same of you and Ayako."

"I suppose Shunsuke and I get along okay." Gunmax said somewhat dismissively, cutting off Dumpson before he could stammer out something he'd regret. The fact that every bot seemed to have a complex and long standing relationship with humans was quite the surprise to many crewmembers, especially those who only knew the species from second hand accounts. The Brave Police weren't too different from Cybertronians, so if they could find friends amongst Earth's inhabitants, maybe it was possible for everyone? More than a few of those in the audience were considering visiting to see for themselves when the attention turned to the only member who hadn't given an answer. 

Lowering his helm to hide his optics from view, Duke appeared to be blushing as he spoke into his microphone, his volume barely more than a murmur as he did so.

"My Lady, Regina, is very important to me…"

While the statement undoubtedly had plenty to unpack, Deckerd mercifully chose to move on, selecting the next lucky audience member. Tailgate stood up in a flash, getting up on his chair and raising his arm so everyone could see him. Smiling with excitement, he was nevertheless quite polite in his tone when he asked his question. "You can transform, right? What are your altmodes?"

"I transform into a police cruiser." Deckerd said simply, earning some nods of approval from the audience. That was a fairly solid alternate mode, from their perspective, and fit quite well with his appearance and abilities. As the team each volunteered their own altmode, there was little fanfare.

"I'm a dump truck."

"My alternate mode is called a power shovel."

McCrane was the first to smile, though his good humor was shared when he gave his answer. "A crane, fittingly enough."

"I have two; a drill and a jet!" Drill Boy declared with a puffed out chest, and the mood went from calm to shocked all over again. Though he had no concept of a triple changer, the young bot knew that having a plurality of modes was special, and the audible gasps confirmed his guess. Rodimus cast Drift a look of surprise from the stage, speaking without words as they so often did. Not only did this guy have two altmodes, but a drill and a jet? Could you get any more wild? Drift replied with an equally stunned but good natured shrug.

"Like Deckerd, I transform into a police cruiser." Shadow Maru said simply, giving his younger friend a look that drew out a very unhappy pout. Sitting up with a smile, he continued and made very clear why his companion was so upset, and in doing so only made the room erupt once more. "I can also take the form of a tank, a jet, and a canine."

Gasps filled the classroom, and even Ultra Magnus was too shocked to silence them, his jaw dropping in total disbelief at what he'd just heard. Five modes?! Not only that, he was a beastformer to boot?! The ninjabot smiled somewhat smugly at the reactions, getting a few looks from his friends that ranged from jealous to bemused as whispered conversations rushed through the bots. Most had never even heard of such an ability, and yet here he was, a bot from earth with so much talent! Several made a note to ask him for tips as Duke took advantage of the chaos to get his simple reply out of the way.

"I am an ambulance."

The medics of the ship all shared a look at what only they seemed to hear, wondering if perhaps the shy bot knew a few things about human medicine he might share with them later. In the murmurs that followed, however, there came a considerable silence as everyone realized the most anticipated answer had not yet been given.

Gunmax leaned back further in his seat, making a face few could decipher when all the attention zeroed in on him. Pretending to cough, he spoke just loudly enough for his mic to pick up his answer. "Don't have one." 

Somebot made a comment about "Monoformers'' before Deckerd stepped in, reading the emotions of his friend as well as the room to skillfully redirect them. It saved Rodimus the trouble of jumping in to make an example of the bot who'd made the comment. 

"Gunmax typically has a motorbike, one that he can merge with to form a very powerful weapon." he explained, looking at the visor that allowed the mech in question to hide so many of his emotions. A flash of gratitude behind the veneer of apathy allowed him to continue with a smile. "When I combine with J-Decker, I can utilize that weapon for defeating extremely powerful foes."

"We can also combine!" Drill Boy added enthusiastically, pointing to the Build Team and perking up the entire crowd with references to "combining" of all things. Combiners were a precious rarity amongst their own kind, could the humans have truly mastered such technology in addition to multiforming?

"Yes, Dumpson, Power Joe and myself form the Build Tiger." McCrane replied helpfully, gesturing to the group of them and further compounding the confusion. How could they all transform into a single entity, their colors didn't even match! Not only that, but the name absolutely baffled those who had been to earth and those who hadn't. The crane bot only continued his talk and further confounded his audience. "With Drill Boy, our abilities are increased, and we form the Super Build Tiger."

Deckerd, wanting to discuss other things, was granted mercy when he selected Brainstorm via the system.

"What kind of energy do your weapons fire?" he asked, having observed the holsters and folded rifles some of them carried. Being intensely curious as to whether earth had progressed beyond the initial steps of plasma based projectiles, he waited eagerly for a reply.

"Most are based on shells, similar to what humans utilize but on a larger scale." Deckerd said, helpfully taking out his pistol to show what he meant. Metallic bullets fell from the chamber and into his cupped palm, unintentionally shocking the scientist and the more ballistic trained crewmembers. Primitive lead based projectiles, fired by simple chemical reactions?! How were these bots just as intelligent as themselves but defending their lives with the Cybertronian equivalent of stone age technology?!

"Yes, that's what my shotgun fires." McCrane added, patting the sizable weapon on his back as Brainstorm noted a million potential improvements he might offer before they left. 

Shadow Maru, somewhat for the sake of dry comedic effect, unsheathed a blade from his back and shrugged as he held it up. "Personally, I prefer swords." 

Laughter rippled through the audience, though Rodimus caught the clear sight of Drift looking far more like he wanted to applaud the other bot who seemed to gel so well with him. Unable to keep a grin off his face at the friendship forming before his optics, the captain considered setting up a communication line on earth so they could all stay in touch going forward. 

"Where do you all live?" a shy bot said when selected next, bringing to mind how their home planet didn't seem to be built for beings as large as themselves. 

"I stay with Yuuta each night, in the garage. His family has made it my personal home, and I keep them safe." Deckerd replied, describing the situation quite wistfully despite the uncertain expressions that flashed before him. The idea of staying within a single room, like a machine for storage… even bots who didn't mind resting in their altmode couldn't wrap their heads around the idea.

"The rest of us stay at the base, but we're free to go where we please when not on duty." McCrane added, wanting to dispel any ideas that they were at all confined. His words did indeed provide some reassurance, especially considering that a few had been considering "liberating" their new friends if necessary.

"When we travel for work, we live wherever we can." Dumpson said, recalling the many times they'd each had to go across the planet undercover. That notion was quite relatable to the group of travelers, especially those who had gone long periods of time without any home to speak of. Needing to find somewhere suitable while moving undercover had been their existence for years.

Gunmax perked up a little at the topic sitting forward a bit so he could be heard as he extolled the wonders of driving around on his bike. "The roads go on for miles, and some have pretty nice views."

When the next question was called, the Brave Police as a group found it was their turn to be surprised. 

"Do you like earth?"

In another turn of events that no one could have predicted, it was Duke who spoke up first, saying his piece simply but confidently before returning to his usual silence.

"It is the only planet we've ever known, and I would have it no other way."

"Earth has everything dear to us." Deckerd confirmed, a barely contained gleam of pride shining from his optics, both for their home and his friend. Everything about the planet was dear to him, from the life that flourished there to the people who had made him, and he wasn't at all ashamed to say as much. That was something each and every member of the Brave Police could agree on, and in order, they all expressed the same sentiment. 

"Earth has everything we could ever want." McCrane added plainly, looking like he wanted to say more but was held back by his own reservations. The simple smile on his face spoke volumes for him, thankfully. His past mentions of friendship and more with humans resonated deeply with certain bots in the audience. 

"We fight lots of bad guys, but that's to keep all the good humans safe, and they're more than worth it." Dumpson said, sharing a glance with Power Joe, who immediately agreed. The big bots many small friends made his answer and confirmation quite easy.

"Most of the people that live there like us, and we like them too. They have a lot to teach us." he said, recalling his love for martial arts as well as everything else he'd ever been passionate about. The need for patience, the importance of seeing the bright side of life, mentoring the younger beings around oneself… Speaking of the younger, Drill Boy jumped in to reply with his own experiences.

"They've invented all kinds of cool games and sports for us to play!" he said happily, tapping the soccer ball in his chest to emphasize his point. The sport was a genuine passion for him, and without humans he wouldn't have it to enjoy. Slightly more bittersweet thoughts of the many adventures he'd had, and the beings he'd met and lost, but wouldn't trade for anything made him smile far more softly. Tapping his digits together, he added a soft addendum to make his point. "Plus they make lots of other cool things."

"There's not much better than going for a drive on earth, or watching the sunset." Gunmax said in agreement, nodding and closing his optics as he played the memories in his mind. The crew talked plenty about their home of Cybertron, and while it sounded wonderful, he doubted anything could ever surpass his home. One of his first memories was going for a drive on a beautiful day, and he didn't believe any planet could ever offer anything more. Not that he'd be opposed to visiting somewhere else...

"It's our home, and it always will be." Deckerd concluded, unintentionally making the crowd a little emotional with his dedication. A far quieter whisper of conversations briefly passed through them all, this time centered almost entirely on the planet in question. Sure, these bots hadn't ever known another world, but they made their own sound quite wonderful. The many who'd never had a chance to see earth were suddenly feeling quite a bit of longing and curiosity of their own. When the quiet descended once again and Deckerd selected the next bot, the query was hardly a surprise.

"Can we come visit you all sometime?"

The entire team exchanged a look, and Deckerd glanced at Rodimus with the kind of knowing smiles leaders could share when they knew what was happening. While the logistics of such a thing would be a nightmare, there could be no denying the eager faces all around, and any potential benefits were far too great to ignore. Though it would be an impossible amount of work, they both nodded to one another in agreement.

"We would be honored to have you as guests, just as you have taken us into your home."

[tarithenurse]

Spark - 15

Fandom: Enn Enn no Shouboutai / Fire Force. Pairing: Shinmon Benimaru x fem!reader. Content: Hints of smutty thoughts, angst, lack of proofing, suppressed emotions, assholes, fighting, sarcasm. Not necessarily in this order. A/N: Feel free to ASK (or reblog) for tag – in fact: always reblog. Thanks to those who have already <3

15. Choking

…   Reader   …

The dust clings to your sweaty skin as you force your way through Benimaru’s powered offence. Even if the flames he produce don’t hurt you, the heat steals your breath and the pressure of the air still feels like walking through a storm. Clenching the jaw to hold back curses, the best option is to somehow dodge the blasts of fire and come in low, aiming for his ankles in an attempt to knock him off balance.

Easier said than done. And sure enough, when your legs swing around, he simply jumps and somersaults over to land right behind you. One hand grabs one of your arms, fingers tangle into your hair, pulling your back into an arch against the knee he has you pinned with.

“Now what?” he drawls and your subconscious projects lewd images into your mind – most scenarios where he is pulling your hair for “slightly other” reasons.

Your own hand is small around his wrist but the grip is strong and he doesn’t fight as hard against you as a real attack would which means you can pull him along into a tumble that lands you splayed over him on the ground. The hard panes of his muscles cushions your back a bit while the air is knocked out of him. The only problem now is that he somehow has the wits to change the grip, locking your arms by the elbows – the tangle of limbs is angling you awkwardly and pressing you chest out and shoulders back. A slight tilt of the head brings his bored expression into view.

I can grind into his groin, catching him by surprise and -

“Waka! WAKA!” Mamoru and a few of the other men burst out into the sunlit back yard.

Fists clenched, chests heaving, and eyes filled with nervousness, it’s obvious even to you that something’s wrong. Benimaru must have realized to, because he releases you and pulls you to your feet as he urges the men for an explanation.

“Civilian cops -” Mamoru doesn’t get further for the others.

“- they’re everywhere -”

“We heard it’s the same in Sumida and Taito!”

The panicked voice glide into the background and you grab the oversized clothes you had discarded before the sparring, pulling on socks and shoes without bothering to wipe the sand off your feet.

“Other places too, but the worst thing is -”

Mamoru finally manages to overpower his team mates, “- everywhere Company Three is conveniently there too.”

Shinmon’s voice calms your galloping heart though the words are lost on you – they are not meant for you anyways, but the men who set out to track and delay the unwanted search units in their progress as according to the Worst Case Scenario Plan.

“[Y/N].” Like conjured out of nowhere, Benimaru stands before you, his hot hands wrapping tenderly but sternly around your upper arms. “Keep your head clear. You know what to do?”

You could drown in the calm fire of his mix-match eyes. “Yes.”

“Don’t come out until I come for you...” It almost seems like he wants to say something more, his gaze flicking across your face, but his mouth closes and he turns you with a slight push to get you moving.

And move you do.

For once, you don’t bother about removing your shoes as you speed inside, feet beating a scrambling tattoo as you rush down the hallways and into the men’s bathroom (keeping you gaze fixed on the window and ranting apologies to the startled guy who is unaware of anything going on outside). It’s a stretch for you to get up and through the half-sized window, only pausing to check if the little back street is clear.

As you spill out onto the ground ungracefully, a little thought in the back of you head says you’ll be bruised from this. Thankfully, adrenaline is coursing through your veins and forces the body to move on its own.

Over the wall into the neighbour’s garden.

Spot the little outhouse in the north-west corner...and onto the roof while keeping low.

The thoughts have warped into Benimaru’s voice instead of your own, keeping the objective clear just like he would have wanted. Dirty hands reach for the second floor window in the next house, sliding the loose glass pane sideways without the slightest tremble. Are those my hands? They must be, because they do as you want, reaching in and unlocking the window.

It’s a storage room, you realize after entering and closing the unorthodox entry. Technically, some bored-looking wise ass had revealed that days ago but it only really becomes relevant enough to understand now as you clock the futon in the corner. Under there, there’s a couple of altered floorboards to create a hiding space.

Pushing up the cover, you glare at the cramped spot, a hand sliding across your stomach that has gotten softer thanks to Konro’s amazing cooking granting you regular meals. It’ll be tight. Very tight.

...   Benimaru   ...

Cops. Benimaru can’t recall the last time they had set foot in Asakusa – the district has been more or less self-governing for as long as anyone can remember and institutions like police and firefighters had been a part of the neighbourhood watch roles. Still is, but a fraction of them (the ones best at handling combustions) had been selected by Konro and formed the Seventh’s Special Fire Force. The people of Asakasu protect their own...but it had still taken too long to round up the unwelcome “visitors” and even longer to find the sleazy bastard from Company Three who had managed to sneak into the headquarters.

It had taken all of Benimaru’s willpower to keep from reducing the man to ashes. The taste of blood seeped into his mouth, while Doctor Giovanni spoke of the so-called righteous need to study and use (abuse) the young woman. Fiery rage simmered beneath the captain’s skin at the outsider’s obvious lack of compassion, the refusal to see [Y/N] as a human with rights.

Thankfully, Konro had been able to think. His voice could cut stone as he calmly stated what the accepted channels for cross-jurisdiction work were and in particular how they had been violated during this “unauthorized operation”.

That’s when they were handed the official documentation overruling anyone in Asakusa. I could take them on and win. But Konro took the option away by accepting the order from the higher-ups and telling Company Seven to stand aside.

...

“Did you find what you were looking for?” Konro grated out.

No. The twins had been fast, grabbing the few belongings that could betray [Y/N]’s existence and stashing them in the storage together with other goodwill things.

“The intel was...incomplete,” Giovanni conceded, goosebump-inducing sweetness slathered onto every word. “I’m thankful for your help. It’s a relief to know we can trust our colleagues across all of Tokyo to be true to the law and the interest of the nation. Imagine if someone had indeed kept vital information Haijima and the Holy Sol...”

Benimaru nearly cracked his teeth at that, but managed to keep a stoic facade despite the inner rage.

“Yes, where would we be without the government?” Konro reiterated rhetorically. “Humanity would be vulnerable, and we’re here to protect the people, after all.”

The words hung for a moment heavy in the room until the sound of departing vehicles rumbled by the building. Police is leaving.

“...indeed. Yes.” A few fingers touched the brim of the hat, tipping it lightly in salute. “At least today was...fruitful.”

What? The two men in charge of Company Seven didn’t dare move until the door had closed behind Giovanni. [Y/N]. I have to...she has to...if she’s not -

“Beni.” Konro’s hand was heavy on the younger man’s shoulder, his eyes darker than normal with worry. “You have to wait ‘til they are gone.”

[k7l4d4]

Midnight Striga: Fairy Tail/Owl House Cross Fic Episode 4 Part 4

Hello, once again, another piece of Midnight Striga for your reading pleasure!! Everybody Clap Your Hands!!!

With a grunt of exhaustion, Boscha crashed to the floor. The spar had dragged on just long enough to make her and the demon long for rest without them actually needing it. While it may not have been the nightmare she had been dreading when she saw Luz’s smile, it was certainly its own kind of hell. ‘But,’ she mused, a small grin forming, ‘At least I’m starting to make real progress.’ She slowly traced a circle, free of the instability that seemed to plague every spell she formed lately, a small flame forming in front of her. She chuckled to herself at the irony.

Here she was, captain of the Grudgby team, Fire Magic Specialist and Potionist in Training, and she was reduced to the most basic spells she knew of. The fact that she could even get this little flame, no bigger than her thumbs pressed together, without worry was a vast improvement over where she started after that day. She sighed, hauling herself to her feet. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught sight of Luz pouring over that strange crystal thing she had brought in; it was sort of like a Scroll, apparently, not that Boscha understood how. Helping the so-called Demon King to his feet, they wandered back over to Luz.

“Ahem!” Boscha cleared her throat, prompting Luz to throw up her arms in shock, suddenly scrambling to secure her… Terminal, she called it? “So, how did we do?” She said calmly, raising a brow as Luz sheepishly chuckled.

“As much as it pains me to be in agreement with the interloper,” King began, prompting a tick-mark of annoyance from Boscha, “I too wish to know just how impressive I am, and how I can become even greater!!” It took a lot of effort for Boscha not to yell at the little menace for the ‘interloper’ comment, it’s not like she intended to come here!

“Now King,” Luz lightly admonished, “A ruler must be gracious to their guests, even unexpected ones. While you may not be comfortable with Boscha’s presence, and understandably irritated from your earlier encounter, that must not influence your behavior and judgement. A King looks after his Kingdom, and all who dwell within it.” Boscha honestly expected the pompous little demon to start screaming at that, so she was genuinely surprised that he only grumbled slightly and kicked at the ground. “If you apologize for being rude, and say it like you mean it, I’ll get you some snacks later.”

“Hmm… Deal!” King agreed. He turned to Boscha and visibly pulled himself up to his full height. “As the King of Demons, I offer my sincerest apologies for my conduct. Will you accept it?” Boscha had to admit, he certainly sounded sincere. She figured he wasn’t, but it was still impressive.

“I accept your apologies… your majesty.” Boscha said, only reluctantly tacking on the last bit at Luz’s expectant look. How was she so good at getting under Boscha’s skin?

“Well, now that that’s out of the way,” Luz drawled, a too-pleased look on her face. “Let’s take a look at what you can work on.” Boscha and King both made inquisitive noises as she turned the screen of the Terminal towards them, eyes widening as they saw their fight lay across the screen. It was something you could see on any Scroll, but this certainly cemented the fact that Humans had some analog to the communications device.

An image appeared, Boscha launching some rocks that had cracked off the ceiling in response to King’s first spell like Grudgby balls. She remembered the stinging sensation in her hands at that stunt, but the sight of King frantically dancing out of the way on screen brought a tiny smile to her face. “Boscha, you displayed some solid tactics, not instantly going for your magic and using your environment to attack with you. However,” She let the video play, showing Boscha rapidly spinning up Spells to launch… only for them to detonate and send her flying back, King sprawled on the floor in laughter at her expression. “Your muscle memories for Spell Casting, while ordinarily a useful trait for combat if you can avoid overly recognizable patterns, are hindering you while you’re recovering your skill.” Luz finished.

Luz turned to King, who straightened up with a gulp. She narrowed her eyes. “Now, on to King.” She turned back to the Terminal, tapping away rapidly before pulling up some new scenes from their spar, King nervously ringing his paws. Another video popped up, showing King launching his spell towards Boscha, thankfully without any sound coming through. The on-screen Boscha avoided the massive spell by the skin of her teeth, Boscha’s ears ringing in sympathy at her memory. She grinned at the sight of King panting after his spell ended, only to yelp and run as her on-screen double rushed him in anger. “King, I’m gonna be blunt, your magic is powerful, but it’s incredibly draining, and the fact you are totally still while using it means that when the spell ends, you are basically defenseless.” King sheepishly kicked his feet, glancing to the side, while Luz looked on.

Luz cracked again. “I got to say, I’m impressed.” She chuckled at the dumbfounded looks she received. “I’m serious, the two of you did way better than I thought you would.”

“Well, how did you think we’d do?” King tentatively asked.

“I expected you to exhaust yourself inside of a few minutes blasting away at Boscha,” Luz bluntly replied, steam-rolling past his squawk of outrage, “and I expected Boscha to lose focus and just keep trying to cast spells.” Boscha would’ve been offended, but that honestly sounded like something she would’ve done if she hadn’t gotten that demonstration of how powerful the demon’s spell was. Luz smirked. “There isn’t a whole lot I can do to help right now, but in the long run, I think I can sketch out some training regimes to cover your respective weak spots.”

Boscha and King exchanged glances, then nodded. It made sense to them. With that settled, the three decided to head back upstairs. Boscha idly wondered why Luz had the hesitant look in her eyes when she said there wasn’t much she could do, though.

Luz groaned internally, resisting the urge to slam her head against the nearest wall. She was absolutely certain that the debriefing she had gone through with Boscha and King had been a disaster. She had visually confirmed how haphazardly they had gone about things in their spar, even if they had been smarter about it than she thought they would be going in, and had basically admitted that she had thought they would’ve been brain-dead rookies only to be proven wrong! Why had she agreed to taking that job!? Oh, right, because it gave her a way to help people and covertly undermine an undoubtedly corrupt regime starting with the youth; curse her bleeding heart!

As she gathered up the assorted snacks and drinks, making care to remember to grab the treats she had promised King, she wandered out of the Kitchen. As she entered the backroom the group was using to discuss things while Eda got her rest, she was surprised to see Boscha and King laughing about something like old buddies. She spoke up, bemused. “Well, don’t you two look chummy.”

“Oh-hohoho My Titan! Luz! Boscha just told me the funniest story about a Slingshot, a Stink Potion, anda Coven Guard!” King cackled, pounding on the table as he laughed.

“Oh, really? Now this I got to hear.” Luz mused, setting the assorted drinks and snacks on the table. Half a minute later, she was pounding her fist on the table right beside King, tears of uncontrolled laughter gushing down her face. Boscha looked painfully smug at the reaction her story had gotten. “Pffff! W-W-With the Gu-guard! A-And the B-bom-b! And the Cheese!! How you did all that and didn’t get caught, I will never know!!”

“Yeah! I didn’t get caught! That’s what happened!” Boscha sheepishly chuckled, deciding against telling them she had to be bailed out by her parents for that stunt. At least it was funny, though.

As the group enjoyed the treats Luz had brought back, Luz let out a sigh of content. “This is nice.”

“Yeah.” Boscha mused, feeling relaxed after the… drama from before. “Not what I expected from the Owl Lady’s place.”

“Huh? What do you mean by that?” King queried. Luz was just as lost. Eda’s reputation wasn’t that bad, was it?

Boscha blinked, puzzled. “Wait, are you saying that you guys don’t know?” She said, something like shocked awe in her voice.

“Know what, Boscha.” Luz droned.

“Well…” Boscha drawled, still shocked at their lack of knowledge on the topic. “When it comes to the Owl Lady, rumors have always been flying around.”

King snorted. “Trust me, we know. We live with her, remember?”

“As I was saying.” Boscha enunciated tightly after being cut off. Her voice dropped into a deeper, more… mysterious sounding register. “Years ago, a Witch studied at Hexside who was gifted beyond compare. Considered a once in a lifetime prodigy, her skill at learning magic, using it, and her sheer power were without equal in her age group, even outclassing some adults. Her name was Edalyn Clawthorne.”

Luz and King paused, allowing themselves to sink into the story. They had to admit, some of what Boscha was saying lined up with Eda, ability wise at least.

“However, despite her incredible gifts, Eda was a maverick,” Boscha continued. “She openly held rules and order in contempt, and sneered at those who upheld them. Still, she was desired by the Covens, all vying for her incredible gifts, even those outside of her chosen track wanting to tap into her great power for their own agendas. Such attention made her arrogant, believing she was above the constraints of others.”

Luz and King deadpanned; while it was phrased more harshly than the reality, that was definitely Eda being described.

“One day, during tryouts for the Covens, particularly for a spot in the Emperor’s personal Coven, Edalyn boldly and publicly denounced the Coven System, proclaiming it beneath her. The crowd was shocked, unable to comprehend such a thing. As she walked away, smug in her superiority, she collapsed in pain.”

Luz and King leaned in, paying close attention to the details.

“Before the gaze of the crowd, Edalyn’s body twisted, growing in size. Feathers sprouted from her arms, her hands and feet twisting into sharp talons. Her body warped into an Avian form, sprouting wings large and powerful enough to hold her aloft. Her eyes became as dark as night, drinking in even the brightest of lights. Her jaw warped to accommodate a mountain of jagged fangs. She had become the Owl Beast.” Boscha paused, with Luz and King gasping in shock at the tale.

Clearing her throat and taking a drink, Boscha continued. “As the transformation ended, the monstrous beast was beheld by the crowd, and found to be repulsive, a monster. The crowd jeered, and chased the beast into the woods, it’s haunting cries echoing through the town. Eventually, Edalyn returned, and proclaimed herself a Wild Witch, and an enemy of the Covens. The Emperor’s Coven declared her transformation a punishment from the Titan for defying the system, making her to be an example. And thus, the Owl Lady was born.” Boscha finished, voice returning to normal. She leaned back, adding, “And ever since then, she’s basically been used as a scary story by parents to warn their kids about the dangers of pride and going against the system.” 

Boscha shrugged. “I mean, I never really believed the story, not any more than any of the other kids, but it was still a big thing to learn about, and a lot of the more free-spirited kids growing up got less outspoken after hearing her story.” She paused, scratching her chin in thought. “It probably makes it more believable that she lives outside of town and regularly shows up and causes trouble. Seeing someone described as a once-in-a-lifetime prodigy reduced to a crazy old bat, no offense,” She quickly raised her hands placatingly at an angry King and Luz, “probably made a lot of kids treat the warning more seriously.”

Luz froze, not entirely sure how to process this. King was stock still, glancing at his pauses in confusion. Clearing her throat, Luz spoke up. “Well, that was certainly entertaining, I’ll admit, but how does anyone know she actually-”

“HOOOOOTTTTT!!”

Luz abruptly cut off at the sound of Hooty’s pained scream. The three glanced at each other, before quickly rushing out the door. As they crashed into the Living Room, they froze in horror. The place was ripped apart, the couch shredded, the assorted piles of random junk strewn about, Hooty’s door knocked off its hinges with Hooty himself out cold. Claw marks covered the walls.

The three scanned the room, stomachs filling with dread. As they wandered the room, Luz took stock of the damage; whatever had caused this either wasn’t very high on the intelligence level, or was insanely scared and angry. King crawled over to Hooty, sniffing at him, feeling a surprising degree of relief at the sound of his breathing. Boscha positioned herself in the center of the room, ready to spring into action at a moment’s notice. Just as she was about to speak up, Boscha stilled, feeling hot, heavy breathing across the back of her neck.

With trepidation, Boscha slowly turned around, blanching at the sight behind her. A large, feathery body, twice as tall as she was. Long heavy wings pressed tight against its sides, but doubtless capable of spreading to full length in an instant. Deep pools of darkness where its eyes would be. A jaw filled with jagged fangs. Boscha screamed. The beast roared. Its claws slashed down towards the panicked witch.

[prongsisabadger]

The Wolf Pack Chapter 11

When we arrived, the masters had been surrounded and were about to be executed. The clones started firing on the droid army the second the doors opened. I positioned myself at the very front of them so I could act as a shield from the incoming enemy fire. Several masters boarded the ship, and within a few minutes we had taken everyone off the arena and were heading to the frontlines. Master Plo had boarded another, I could feel his presence, he was okay.

"Clone, what's the status?" Asked Master Ki-Adi-Mundi.

"Master, the troops are engaging the enemy as we spe-"

"I was not talking to you, Padawan. Let the adults speak." He berated before turning to the clone commander once again.

One of the troopers behind me, put his hand on my shoulder and squeezed. You are a part of the 104th now. I put my own hand on top of his. I was okay, it took more than a sneer from a cranky old man to get me down.

"Your men will come with me, I will lead them into the battlefield and we will press the offensive. You, Padawan," he said turning to me. "Will bring up the rear where you will be in no one's way."

"As you wish, Master."

Once again, the blast doors opened and we stepped into the battlefield. Our squadron formed up behind Master Mundi and on we went. The enemy was heavily armed and our going was not as fast as Master Ki-Adi must have expected, so he kept yelling for us to push forward. And then, the first trooper fell. I rushed to check on his vitals. He was still alive, but needed medical attention.

"Padawan, leave that clone and keep your position!" I heard Master mundi yell.

Underneath me the clone groaned, I knew what I had to do. I turned my lightsaber ona and stood over him, shielding him from enemy fire. Behind me, another squadron was making their way toward us. I only had to hold on a little longer.

"PADAW-"

"Captain," I spoke up over the noise of blasterfire. "Have the medic in your squadron take this man to the medical triage. He needs immediate assistance."

"Yes, Commander. Right away!"

When I was sure they had him, I tightened the grip on my saber and rushed ahead to my squadron. I made it to their position in no time and prevented two droids from sneaking behind them. Master Ki-Adi's formation was making the clones take more fire than they should and were quickly beginning to crumble under the pressure.

"Master Mundi we need to change the formation, the troops cannot take fire this heavy!" I said as I moved in front of a trooper to deflect a blast.

"You dare question me after disobeying my orders?" He yelled over the sound of blasters going on.

"Defeating the enemy means nothing if we lose half our forces, Master" I pressed.

"Fine, take half the squadron and do as you please, we will see if you are as confident after you fail."

I didn't even bother talking back, I got what I wanted. I took half a dozen clones and took cover on a ditch to regroup.

"Okay, listen here troopers, we are changing things up. You will make a diamond formation with me on point. I will act as a shield. We will press the offensive."I paused to look at them. "You two will take the right flank and you two the left. The two of you will bring up the rear and provide support for any fallen troopers we find in our way."

They were all listening to me attentively and I couldn't help feeling like I needed to reassure them.

"We are a Pack now, gentlemen. Let's act like one and hunt the enemy down."

"A Pack, huh, I like that, Commander. Let's show those clankers who's the predator here."

And on my signal, we went on our way. I managed to draw the enemy fire and lessen the burden on the team. We gained a lot of terrain as we advanced, moving swiftly and efficiently through the ranks of droids. Cutting down dozens upon dozens of them. Every Fallen trooper we came upon was protected until a medic could get him to the medical triage. We were so engrossed in the battle, so concentrated on fighting, on surviving that we made it right to the frontlines.

"Kriari!" I heard someone yell.

The moment I lost my concentration, I took a shot to my left bicep.

"Commander!" CT- 3636 said before shooting the droid that had managed to injure me.

"I'm fine Commander, don't break formation." I answered before regaining my position.

Thankfully, blaster fire cauterized wounds on it's own, so there was no fear of blood loss. It was very painful though, and the pain slowed me down considerably. It seemed like we would be overwhelmed by enemy fire when another squadron appeared to our right and took the enemy out.

"Kriari, Child. What are you doing here on your own?" Master Plo asked as his troops surrounded our team and let us catch a breath.

"Master Ki-Adi's squadron was suffering heavy losses and I suggested we break it up into two teams to reduce casualties." I said as Master Plo's medic ripped my sleeve and started treating the wound in my arm.

"I see, and how did that go for you?" He asked, looking at my team who was now having some water and reloading their blasters.

"We were doing fine until you distracted me, Master." I smiled at him.

"Is that so? What does your team have to say about that?" He asked, directing the question to the clone commander.

"Unconventional but effective, General. Commander Foreas' strategy allowed us to make much better time and suffer no losses. We also managed to get medical help for some troopers that had been left behind." He reported.

"I see. Well, reinforcements have arrived. Now, have your team escort my Padawan to the medical triage-"

"But master-"

"Kriari, this is an order. You've had enough action for today." He sighed when I looked down, trying to hide the tears that were forming. "The war has just begun, young one. I know your intentions are good, but you are hurt, and a liability to your team. I will take over from here. Trust that I will finish what you started." He said patting my head softly.

"Commander, have two men escort her, the rest of you will press the attack with me." He commanded.

"Sir, yes, sir." He turned to the clones that had been on my left during the entire attack. "You heard the general. Protect the commander and get her to safety."

"Yes, Sir." They both answered before turning to me. "Let's go, Commander, we'll get you back in one piece, you'll see."

And get me back they did. They never left my side, not even when the medic in the triage declared he was done stitching me up. They took their helmets off and started chatting animatedly, but they never let go of their blasters.

"Do you guys have names?" I asked finally. "I don't mean your CT numbers," I added quickly. "I heard in Kamino some of you gave each other names."

They looked at one another and then at me.

"Yeah, we do," said the one to my right. "My name is Boost, that's Art."

I smiled and took a sip from my cantine. Geonosis was very dry and very hot.

"Boost and Art. I like them. Is there a story behind them?" I asked curiously.

They both chuckled and nodded at the thought.

"Yeah, Boost here was always asking his squad to 'boost him up' during the citadel training simulations. And I have the bad habit of wanting to draw or paint on every plain surface I see."

I chuckled at how silly the reasons were. But it did occur to me that no matter how small the reason, they really didn't need an excuse for wanting a name. It was kind of sad if I really thought about it. The struggle of standing out in an army that looks exactly like you.

"I like them a lot. It's a pleasure to meet you both."

[tearsofthemis]

Tears of Themis : Chapter 1 “Social Snobbery” Part 6

[Previous Part] | [Masterlist] | [Next Part]

▌ Location- Break room

(By the time Zuo Ran ended his phone call, the break room was empty. He picked up the intermediate lawyer examination prep guide that was left on the coffee table, and flipped through the notes that she took in the pages.)

Zuo Ran: “To find a partner, huh…”

(Zuo Ran put down the book, and sent out a voice memo.)

Zuo Ran: “Zhai Xing, in regards to your suggestion that I find a partner to reduce my workload. Do you have any recommendations?”

(His message was read, and replied to instantly.)

Zhai Xing (voice memo): “Depends on what kind of person you’re looking for. If there’s no one in Themis that catches your eye, I can hire someone.”

(Zuo Ran paused to think about his reply.)

Zuo Ran: “I don’t have high demands, as long as they’re upright, persevering, and won't succumb to authority.  In regards to qualifications they should be comparable to me- no, forget that, as long as they’re qualified, there’s no need for them to be like me in terms of ability or temperament. What I need is a mirror, not an imitator.” (Zuo Ran rarely sends texts, let alone so many at once. There was no response from Zhai Xing.)

Zuo Ran: “I guess she can’t think of anyone suitable…” (Zhai Xing’s reply came at last, as Zuo Ran prepared to head back to his office.)

Zhai Xing (voice memo): “You call this, ‘not demanding’?! Wake up, Zuo Ran! Those qualified to be your mirror are far and few!” (After hearing Zhai Xing’s outburst, Zuo Ran sighed. He drew his attention back to the spread of exam books on the coffee table, and brushed his finger over the cover.)

Zuo Ran: “Far and few… you say…”

~~~

▌ Location- Commerce Avenue

(On our way to QingPing restaurant, XinRan and I coincidentally met up with Xia Yan, a good friend of mine that I lost contact with eight years ago.)

MC: “XinRan said she hired a detective, it must be you!”

(A bio-engineering honors student from Capital University, abandoned his career path as a scientist, only to return as a budding detective?!)

Xia Yan: “Of course. I don’t understand why you’re so shocked, doing detective work is my lifelong passion. I’m finally able to fulfill my dreams!”

MC: “That, is unexpected to say the least…”

Xia Yan: “Then the lawyer that Miss. Xue was looking for, that must be you. It looks like you also fulfilled your goal of attending Stellis University’s law school.” (I was still reeling from the information overload, and I couldn’t pay attention to what Xia Yan was saying.)

Xue XinYan: “That’s right, it’s her. I didn’t know you guys knew each other.” (XinRan looked at us, but chose not to press any further.)

Xue XinRan: “Grandpa Fang lives on the second floor of the restaurant. He should be at home, let me call him down.” (XinRan went up and knocked on the door. I quickly composed myself, pulling my mind away from dwelling on our fateful encounter, but Xia Yan kept smiling, his eyes focused on me all the while.)

MC: “Why… do you keep looking at me?”

Xia Yan: “Even after so many years apart, you haven’t changed.”

MC: “That’s impossible, it’s been eight years, change is bound to happen. I mean, I’ve definitely grown taller.” Xia Yan: “But not in my eyes, you’ll always be my… Just like back when I was sixteen, exactly the same.” MC: “Must you speak so vaguely? Like you? Are you labeling me as a tomboy?”

Xia Yan: “No no...”

MC: “I was kidding, relax.”

(The restaurant door was opened by a man with snowy white hair. This must be Fang Yuan.)

Fang Yuan: “XinRan, I’ve already told you not to bother with the case. The health inspection team has already reached their verdict, there’s no point in investigating further.”

Xue XinRan: “Grandpa Fang, even if we must pay the settlement, we shouldn’t let those customers demand unrealistic charges. Look, I’ve found these two people that can help us.”

MC: “Hello, Mr. Fang. My name is-”

(I hesitated to finish my self introduction after I took in Fang Yuan’s exhausted state.)

MC: (Mr. Fang doesn’t look alright…)

~~~Investigation start!~~~

▌ [Examine Fang Yuan’s mouth]

AI:

“Ah, there, we can see his face clearer. But… Why are Grandpa Fang’s lips purple? According to the big data center, purple discoloration on the lips can be attributed to cardiovascular disease.”

[Select, “heart issues”]

MC: (Cyanosis present on the lip, should be a sign of his ailing heart condition.)

▌ [Examine Fang Yuan’s eyes]

MC: “He’s got pretty nasty dark circles. I bet he’s lost sleep over the incident in his restaurant.”

▌ [Examine Fang Yuan’s hand, select “bruising from IV”]

MC: (Did the countless IV drips leave behind such a deep bruise? A cardiac condition at Grandpa Fang’s age is serious and his health must have taken a big toll. I need to watch what I say when we interrogate him, it would be bad if we caused him emotional shock. It’s as XinRan said, Grandpa Fang is quite frail, and he looks tired. Considering the fact that he detests lawyers, I should hide my identity for now.)

AI: “It looks like you have come to your own conclusion, let’s finish this investigation.”

~~~Investigation end!~~~

MC: “I am PI Xia’s assistant, and this, is Mr. Xia Yan.” (Xia Yan did not react to my cover-up. Thankfully, he didn’t question it, either.)

Xia Yan: “Nice to meet you, Mr. Fang, my name is Xia Yan. My mother and father left this world when I was young, and if it weren’t for kindhearted people like yourself, there was no way I would’ve been able to attend university either. Ah, Miss Xue has informed me of your situation, and I admire what you have done out of the goodness of your heart. We’re here today because we would truly like to help. I sincerely ask for your permission to investigate your case, would that be alright?” (Perhaps it was Xia Yan’s convincing words, or his infectious and honest smile, that made Fang Yuan cave to his demand.)

Fang Yuan: “Let’s talk inside.” (As Mr.Fang let us inside, I purposely lagged behind so I could walk behind the group as any dutiful assistant would. Xia Yan leaned down and whispered by my ear, his hot breath sending shivers down my spine as I blushed.)

Xia Yan: “You sure got into character quickly.”

MC: “I’m only pulling from the childhood experience of pretending to be your assistant when we played detective. It feels like muscle memory by now. But aren’t you curious as to why I chose to hide my identity?” Xia Yan: “Of course I am. But you have my trust, and that’s not something a little bit of time between us will change, right? I trust you.”

~~~

▌ Location- QingPing Restaurant

Xia Yan: “Mr, Fang, can you confirm that you were the one that accidentally mixed the powdered pesticide into the spring water?”

(Once we were seated in the restaurant, Xia Yan began questioning Mr. Fang. The questions that he asked were the exact same as the ones we asked XinRan back at the law firm.)

[Flashback]

Xue XinRan: “Grandpa Fang said that he was the one who sprinkled the pesticide powder, and his poor eyesight is to blame for mistaking the water source. He wasn’t paying attention…”

Zuo Ran: “He claims he wasn’t paying attention, but afterward is so sure that it was caused by his misoperation. That’s a logical fallacy...”

[Flashback ends]

Fang Yuan: “It was me. Sigh, I’m getting old, and can't see or move around like I used to. I wasn’t careful…”

Xia Yan: “On the day of the incident, when was the spring water delivered to the restaurant?”

Fang Yuan: “The spring water is sourced from YunXia Mountain, and is usually delivered everyday around 6 AM.” Xia Yan: “After the water delivery, was there always someone present in the restaurant?”

Fang Yuan: “No, the restaurant was empty from 6 AM to 8 AM. The helper and I went out to purchase produce for today’s service. The waiter, Xiao Zhao, arrived at 9 AM…” (Fang Yuan’s sentence was cut short by a coughing fit, turning his face bright red with effort as he hacked.)

XinRan: “Grandpa Fang, are you alright?”

Fang Yuan: “XinRan, help me upstairs. My chest hurts, and I would like to rest…”

MC: “Mr. Fang, is it serious? Do you need to go to the hospital?” Fang Yuan: “No, that won’t be necessary. It’s an old condition, and I’ll be alright once I lie down and rest. The restaurant encompasses the entire first floor, feel free to check what you need. I use that computer there for bookkeeping, there’s no password on it. If you need to use it, be my guest. Although, it’s been two weeks since the incident. The restaurant is cleaned daily, and any leftover food or ingredients have been thrown away. I don’t know if investigating will help, I’m afraid.”

(We watched XinRan help Fang Yuan up the stairs. The moment they were out of earshot, I turned and whispered to Xia Yan.)

MC: “Mr. Fang’s attitude back there was a little strange. Hopefully we can find clues that they missed. The sooner we can crack the case, the better. But he’s been pessimistic from the start, emphasizing that the restaurant isn’t worth looking into. The way he answered your question was barely satisfactory.

Xia Yan: “The way I see it, he isn’t fully willing to cooperate with us, the reason why we weren’t denied earlier is because he didn’t want to seem suspicious. On the other hand, food poisoning caused by ingestion of pesticide itself is suspicious as well. Since the majority of pesticides available on the market are harmless to humans, why would Mr. Fang purchase anything dangerous for use in a restaurant?” MC: “We don’t have an answer for that either…”

-------

[Previous Part] | [Masterlist] | [Next Part]

-------

《CREDIT》 Translator: @humi-and-co Editor: @hallowsivy​ 《未定事件簿》Tears of Themis is a 2020 Chinese otome game by 米哈游Mihoyo. All original credits go to 米哈游Mihoyo. 

《 VOICE ACTORS 》  Xia Yan | Jin Xian: https://weibo.com/riceranger Zuo Ran | Zhao Lu: https://weibo.com/mzhaolu Lu HaiYang | Zhang Pei: https://weibo.com/u/1937059462 Xue XinRan | V17-Su Wan: https://weibo.com/u/2925530143 Fang Yuan | Zhao Yang

[buckleyydiaz]

Dream Boy pt.3

Moreid, 1.3k, final part of “Dream Boy”

Summary: maybe things aren’t always as they seem.

What Spencer hadn’t been expecting on his day off was a message from Derek, asking if they could meet up and talk. He had been looking at his phone, counting down the minutes until he could pick up the phone in the booth and call Maeve.

Normally, he would have left the message, attempting to ignore it indefinitely, at least leaving it until he had finished talking to Maeve, if not longer, but something inside him urged him to respond. He wasn’t quite sure what it was, although he did always have trouble not responding to Derek - he blamed it on the wistful part of him that still believed that maybe there was a chance that Morgan could like him back.

Spencer thought maybe it was the abruptness of the message - Derek rarely texted him to talk, and when he did, it was heavily disguised as a simple request to just hang out - or maybe it was guilt. Derek had been as supportive as always, constantly offering to be there to support him, even when Spence would barely tell him what was happening.

But whatever it was, he messaged back.

Spencer: Of course! I can be at your place in 30 minutes?

Derek: Thanks Pretty Boy, that sounds great.

Something was definitely wrong. Derek using proper capitalisation and spelling without any excessive emojis or punctuation was practically unheard of. If he weren’t so aware that Maeve would be waiting on his call, Spencer would have up and left, straight to help his best friend.

He picked up the phone and punched in the numbers, calling Maeve, before hanging up and waiting for her to return the call. This would be a short conversation - Spencer didn’t think he could handle not seeing Derek soon.

--

Maeve, although disappointed he had to go so soon, was perfectly understanding of why Spencer needed to go. She had spent enough time listening to him talk endlessly about his co-worker that she got why he was leaving.

The moment he hung up, Spencer calculated whether it would be faster to call for a taxi or to just walk to Derek’s, quickly deciding that he was better off walking - it wasn’t too far, and it would be faster than waiting for a cab to arrive. 

As he walked, his mind raced as to what Derek could possibly want to talk about. Was he ill? Was his mother, or one of his sisters? Was he leaving the team? Nothing good seemed to be a possibility in his mind.

Thankfully, before long, Spencer was knocking on his best friend’s door. 

“Morgan?” he called out when he didn’t quickly get a response from anyone except Clooney, who Spencer could hear making his way to the door to greet him. After what was probably only seconds but seemed like ages, Derek came to the door, his face tinted slightly red and his eyes puffy. 

Spencer was wishing he had come earlier, regardless of Maeve. His adoration of her held nothing to the feelings he felt for Morgan.

“Hey Spence,” Derek said in a voice Spencer assumed was supposed to sound nonchalant, but due to the shakiness sounded weak.

Despite his general aversion to them, Spencer, having pulled the door behind him as he entered the house, reached out to hug his friend, hoping to offer some sort of comfort and reassurance that he was there for him, regardless of what was wrong.

“You wanted to talk?” Spencer asked as he pulled back, still thoroughly concerned about Derek, given that he never really cried, not when there would be someone else who would know anyway. 

“Yeah, uh,” he paused, contemplating what to say next. “How about we sit down?”

Spencer followed Derek over to the couch, where they both sat, on opposite ends, their bodies angled towards each other.

“Thank you for coming, Spence, I hope I didn’t interrupt anything.”

You did, Spencer thought, but it’s you, so I really don’t mind. He simply smiled though, knowing his friend would feel unbelievably guilty if he found out that Spencer had been going to talk to Maeve.

“I don’t really know how to say any of this, to be honest,” he laughed, but the smile never reached his eyes. “I’m not really one for this talking about feelings stuff. It’s normally easier to disregard it and move on.

“But I don’t think I can do that anymore. Blake pointed it out to me. Blake. When the newbie can tell something is wrong, well clearly something has to happen.”

Again, that laugh. The grin that never met his eyes. It was familiar, and as Spencer thought about it, it was a look growing increasingly common on Derek’s face. How did he miss this?

“Y’know, I didn’t want to tell you this, even after she pointed it out. You have the girl in the phone booth, and you’ve been so happy recently, and I don’t wanna fuck that up for you.”

Just by being you, you have ruined any chance of anything between me and Maeve, Spencer wanted to say, But you could never fuck things up for me intentionally, and I will always listen to anything you have to say. I’m sorry I never offered.

But he didn’t. Derek had to say what he needed to say, and if Spencer interrupted, there was no guarantee he would keep talking. As he had said, he wasn’t one for deep emotional talks.

“Everyone on the team has a life outside of the job, except for me. Everyone has at least someone else to keep them sane. I don’t have that, Pretty Boy. I just have you. And now you know. And I know that I am probably going to lose you know, that I have most likely fucked everything up, but I- You needed to know.”

Spencer was pretty sure that his jaw had dropped open some time in that speech. His brain seemed to fly out of his ears or something, along with his ability to correct Derek, and tell him just how wrong he was.

Emily had once said that looking at a pretty girl had slashed his IQ from 187 to 60. But that was nothing compared to hearing his best friend, his crush, his… something, profess that he felt something non-platonic at some level towards him.

In a desperate attempt to regain control of his ability to regain his brainpower, in order to speak, and breathe, and exist, Spencer tried to shut his mouth and formulate what he wanted to say.

He was unprepared. There was no formula for this, no sure-fire way to guarantee that the words that came out of his mouth would be the right ones. But he would try his best. He had to. For Derek.

“Thank you for telling me, Der. I- um, well-”

“Spencer, you don’t have to say anything, you can leave if you want. I hope I didn’t make you too uncomfortable, but if you need me to take some time off, or anything at all-” 

Before he could finish apologising, and attempting to unnecessarily make amends, Spencer cut him off, much the same as Derek had done to him.

“Just give me a chance to think. I believe that my brain function has dramatically reduced as a result of shock,” he paused for a moment, realising that wasn’t what he wanted to be saying, “But anyway, I think you are jumping to conclusions. Because there is nothing in what you said that makes me uncomfortable, except for the fact that I never noticed that you were hurting.

“In fact, I am quite glad to hear what you had to say. I’ve actually wanted to hear you say something like that to me for quite some time.”

Derek looked incredulous, his jaw dropping in an excellent mirroring of Spencer’s previous expression.

“Pretty boy, but what about your girlfriend?”

“If you mean Maeve, she is just a friend. Not like you.”

There was a moment of silence, before Derek moved closer.

“Does that mean I can kiss you?”

Spencer didn’t take the time to reply, instead closing the gap between them.

[popculturebuffet]

Paul Dini’s Jingle Belle: The Mighty Elves (Comissoned by WeirdKev27)

Well well boys, we’re back to Jingle Belle with another kevmission, though per his request i’ll be getting back to Life and Times Of Scrooge McDuck at long last. I also have some other stuff planned and all that, but for now, let’s focus on everyones faviorite elfen hellion as we dive back into Paul Dini’s Jingle Belle. 

I covered most of the behind the scene’s stuff last time so in short in case your just joining us, since this one���s got a bit more stuff to tag: Jingle Belle is an indie comic book character created by animation god Paul Dini, the daughter of Santa Claus and the Queen of Elves who acts like a standard rebellious teenager sterotype and causes trouble for her dad.  Last time I touched on the character a good two days ago, we looked at her first appearance, where she sent her family to Family Therapy. At the time I’d ONLY read that story, and hadn’t gotten that far into Jing’s world just yet. As you probably guessed despite plugging a decent amount of time into re-reading the rest of Scott Pilgrim (shout out to my good friend Mike for the early christmas present), on digital and in color and into the Switch port of the first Fire Emblem, I still got 2/3 of the way through the omnibus Kev gifted me of almost all her stories up to 2018′s The Handmade’s Tale.  Honestly not a lot has changed from the pilot.. while Jing’s designs changed a bit, she’s still more of a rebellious hellion, and while Santa’s no longer a slut shaming jackass, he’s still hard on her while her mom tries to keep the peace, The humor’s still edgy, if toned down enough to support returning whenever Dini felt like it but it’s largely the same for better or worse.  Overall the stories haven’t been bad but have been a bit reptitive to read in one giant omnibus. This really is down to the format they were made in: These were one off stories spread months apart meant to be picked up off the shelf with no real ongoing stories or character development and only some slight worldbuilding here and there. In short not bad stuff, just clearly not built to be collected in a huge omnibus like it was and not the first comic collection i’ve encountered with this problem and definitely not the last. 

That being said the stories are creative and still well put together. It is Paul Dini and he has wrote pretty much every story collected here with few exceptions, so it’s still good stuff, just as I said clearly not meant to be read all in one block like i’ve been doing. And today’s story happens to be one of my faviorites so far, breaking the formula up a bit by having Jing do something a bit diffrent and also involving hockey, a sport this story made me realized might actually intrest me on some level.. if in part due to letterkenny. 

God bless those two handsome idiots. So let’s ice up or skates, get those letterkenny refrences at the ready and see what the Mighty Elves have to offer. 

We start at Hockey Practice for Santa’s Hockey Team, The Elves, the kind of sentence that makes me really happy to type for money. Santa’s team is naturally for this kind of story and what the title references, are the last place in the bi-polar hockey league their in.. presumably ran by commissioner bi-polar bear. 

Again, I really love this job and that i’m actually getting paid for this this go round. Anyway, Santa’s team isn’t all that agressive because.. well i’ts a team coached by Santa, why would they be? But Santa’s still proud of his boys... as for his girl on the otherhand he gets a call and we soon find out via mugshots Jing dragged her two friends, up from just one in previous stories, to an air force base, somehow got arrested for hitting on enlisted men, not a crime, and stealing and crashing a helicopter, very much a crime.  Naturally Santa isn’t pleased, so we cut to a few days later where he’s letting her friends off making robo kitties, damn I want one of those now, while leaving Jing to do the packaging, though like most stern but fair dad’s he admits he dosen’t like punishing her and is right in saying there’s more to do with her summer vacation than you know, piss off the military. Santa needs his flight clerance dammit. Jing complains there isn’t much to do but feed the reindeer and make toys to which I say.. really santa? You haven’t set up anything else for your eleves to do? Making toys is their job. Build a fucking movie theater. And at the very least if not for them than for your bored and rebellious daughter to distract her from doing crimes. She’s still likely got a few hundred years of teenagering left, give her something else to do other than piss you off.  Santa does have a least a little something: Hockey! Which Jing’s cousin Rusty has taken up. Rusty showed up in the first story but I kind of glossed over him, he’s basically Jing’s Dorky cousin she frequently abuses. Not really much more or less to him. Jing isn’t on board mostly because their team always looses, to the other teams: The Penguins, the Polar Bears, The Snow Leopards and the Eskimos because they don’t really have killer instinct, which yeah is kind of necessary for hockey. To her..

But during her rant she does show Santa she’s got genuine talent for the sport, so he makes her a deal: Do a little favor for him, and she’ll swap that for making toys.. it’s a deal.. one she soon regrets but hey. 

Jing naturally makes an ass of herself pretty quickly beating the shit out of Rusty with her dad repremanding her and threatning to throw her off the team if she has another outburst like. That is until she runs into the Huskies Coach, Stan. 

I mean i’ts a hairy old man who makes a side bet with Santa Claus despite it technically being against commission rules, might as well be. So Santa tells Jing screw it, as long as it’s the opposing team violence is a-okay.  And naturally our first target is the world famous hockey player, aka snoopy aka a snoopy stand in. And being a big fan of peanuts i’m a sucker for a good peantus parody. Doubly so since Dini did his homework, and as I’d remembered and a quick google confirmed “The World Famous Hockey Player” was indeed one of snoopy’s many personas.

 Not that it was much of a stretch: just about any time snoopy played a sport he was “the world famous X player”, but still it’s a nice little nod. Not so nice is Jing within seconds slamming him into the air and under a Zamboni and getting sent to the box for it naturally. So clearly she’s the shorsey of this team, all chirps and ultra violence. 

Snoopy is thankfully still alive, if barely, though he’s off course been through much worse.

But while in the Box jing helps advise the team and a presumed combination of her beating the shit out of the other team’s best players and her team now not only having something to inspire them but a strategy means the Elves win for once! Santa and Jing share a hug, though Santa advises her not to go for his wallet, it’s still a sweet moment as she’s genuinely invested now.  So we cut to..

Okay Hank Ribbon seal is genuinely one of the best things humanity has made but as for Quiki I just... wow that joke is mildly racist at worst, confusing and unfunny at best. I mean... it really just makes no sense on any level and that’s with me not knowing a lot about hockey, but knowing just enough to know Kathy Lee Gifford existed. Just.. what even was that? I know Paul can do better than this.. because as my first review outlined he wrote a LOTTTT of Tiny Tune Adventures including my favorite episode. He also wrote most of the best Joker episodes for BTAS, so it’s not like the guy CAN’T be funny.. so I have no idea how he could fail so hard with this. Just.. what is this. Who thought this was funny? what was the joke? 

That.. utter bafflement aside, this newscast is used to push things ahead as the elves are on a winning streak, having also beaten the Polar Bears and the Penguins.. though weirdly we DON’T get a cameo by this guy despite having already had Snoopy show up. 

That’s my boy. But yeah there’s only two teams left with this, the Eskimos and tonight’s matchup the Snow Leopards, aka snow catgirls lead by Tashi Ounce, who Jing met at the winter games last year and lost too and thus has a whole rivlary thing going. In a really nice moment Santa stops to make sure Jing is okay going into the game. 

It’s part of why I REALLY like this story: Santa instead of just being disapointed in his daughter genuinely bonds over her over something and Jing shows she has a softer side to her. It’s some good character stuff, helps shake up the normal formula nicely. Back to the usual though she and Tashi naturally go at it, phrasing, and fight the whole damn time, with Belle eventually scoring the winning goal. Though noticably while Tashi is just as competiive as belle and lost this time.. she’s fine with it, knowing she’ll win next time and congradulating the opponent.  But before she can leave the rink, Tashi is approached by a mysterious figure with an offer and we cut to said figure’s lair... it’s THE BLIZZARD WIZARD! dun dun dun!.... yeah I haven’t introduced him the Blizzard Wizard is.. well exactly what he sounds like, as well as the former ruler of the North Pole. He enslaved everyone there to do his bidding and was essentially, a butt till Santa showed up, united all the various animals and kicked his ass. Since then he’s been reduced to basically a rankin bass villian, lurking near bye and scheming to get petty revenge on Santa for it. So essentially....

Minus the tragic backstory. He offers them a deal: The championship cup for him defeating the elves. As he puts it the cup symbolizes hard work, respect and team work.. i.e the things their throwing out to get payback. Tashi wants none of it, but the blizzard wizard has his slush minons capture her and with the rest willing to sell out, he gets to work. 

Bliz snows out the eskimos, and brings up accusations of Santa gambling, which he gets away from by.. having his wife donate the money real quick don’t ask just go. But he has a waiver signed by the other coaches so their playing his goons. But Jing isn’t phased and Santa asks her to give the lockeroom some inspiring words. 

10/10 no notes. But naturally Bliz has a sneaky trick up his sleeves.. to win.. specifically a hot french canadian player which.. makes jing fall to pieces flirting with him and makes her entirely ineffective. Okay time out.... huh so this is the timeless void known only to zack morris, that girl from the reboot I haven’t watched, and Regis Filbin. But yeah while I wouldn’t expect Jing to slaughter the guy it feels out of character for all she’d do is to giggle like an idiot instead of making a move. She’s been established as forward and knowing what she wants. I’m not against her being distracted by this it’s just the how that feels off especially since the opening reinforces this. She hit on air force guys. She’s not going to just be giggly and awkward. Jing may not be the most complex charcter but she’s better than this. Aside from the baffling Kathy Lee Gifford gag, this is the only thing I really don’t like abotu the story, and it lasts two pages before it’s resolved and in a 22 or so page story, that’s a good chunk of it spent on something that isn’t funny and that’s out of character even within story. That being said it dosen’t drag the story down entirely, still a good story. Just a bit uneven is all. 

But unsurprisingly Tashi escapes her earlier imprisonment offscreen to let Jing know not only the full extent of Bliz Whiz’s machenations, i.e. that the other coaches are in on it, but that the hockey player is really just one of Bliz’s minons uner a glamour. WIth that knowledge Jing asks why she’d help and Tashi shows her inner honor beneath the whole rival deal, pointing out she wants to win from a GOOD team next year. With the jig up Jing pulvirzes her former crush, claims to have been under a spell (no one byes it) and the elves clean house and win. Super fuckin shooter. As for Bliz Whiz he tries to steal the trophy but instead gets booted into the snow leopards box, phrasing... it doesn’t end well for him. 

And yeah while he comes back eventually, some how, apparently, for most of the stories after this he’s just.. dead. He was killed and then his remains eaten. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

But Jing admits she had fun, she and her dad bond and we get one last gag as he assumes she learned not to showboat only for her to block everyone else in the team photo. Falalallal we’re out. 

Final Thoughts: As I said, one of my faviorites. It’s really well paced, has a good premise and only one part drags at all and only that part and one gag really don’t land. The rest of it is really funny, nice and touching, and overall a nice shakeup from these stories usual pattern of “Jing getting into hyjinks”. While she DOES here, her and her dad are literally and figuartvely on the same team, and she does show a sweeter side genuinely bonding with her dad and it’s nice to see them actually enjoy each other’s company for once. It’s a nice change of pace and one I wish more of the stories had. I’m not saying they all have to be holly jolly but i’d be nice if more of them had a bit of heart to them is all. Tis the season and all that. Still for what it is, it’s a fun ride and I highly recommend it. We’ll probably see her again sometime this season but that’s a bit off.  For now coming up I have some ducktales to tell, a chapter in a man’s life story that’s long overdue, a holiday mess I wish I didn’t have to clean up, and in the distant future.. an old friend to reconnect with. Until then if you liked this review reblog it, comment etc all that good stuff, and you can send me asks with suggestions fo ra review or direct message me, or ask for my discord, to comission a review yourself. Until then, happy holidays. 

[singeramg]

Midnight: Chapter 9

Pairing: Clark Kent- Superman/ Metahuman! Black! OFC

Story Rating: M

Warnings: Overall this is a slow burn story with Angst all throughout. This particular chapter has brief mention of smut, plenty of aforementioned Angst.

A/n: Welcome back everyone! I have loved all the support this has been getting and I swear I am working diligently on the next chapter. Enjoy this one...

CATCH UP HERE!

Midnight: Chapter 9

  “You gave him my middle name” 

Clark is standing in front of me and his emotions blend together so fluidly I can’t tell them apart to get a grasp on what he is feeling.

 “Yes. He could not share your last name, so I gave him something he could share with you.”

 “You wanted no one to know he was my son. Not even him.”

His voice is calmer than I ever could have anticipated it would be. Then again I never expected this to happen. 

 “Nobody could. It was too dangerous, I couldn’t risk it, and to be honest Clark who would believe that he was your child.”

Clark looks away, unable to make eye contact for a moment because he knew I was right.

 “Even now you still believe its dangerous don’t you?”

 “Clark I just...”

 “You weren’t even going to tell me were you?” He asked me, clearly irritated.

 “You want the nice version or the rude one?”

I ask heading over to the nearby chair and away from him. 

 “I just want the truth Gia.” For once Clark Kent sounds exhausted. Honestly I was too, I didn’t expect any of this when I started my day this morning. It seemed like it had been going on forever. 

 “The truth was and still is that a long time ago the man I thought would never abandon me did.”

   “Gia...”

  “Wait Clark let me finish. You abandoned me. Then you died Kal-El. You died and left me here by myself. Even though you left me, Kalen was the only part of you I had left. I had to protect that.”

Clark felt extreme amounts of pain and grief.

  “You did it alone when you didn’t have to.”

I laughed incredulously, bless his heart but he didn’t understand.

  “Clark do you understand the Hell that would have broken loose if I showed up on Mrs. Kent’s doorstep with your baby?”

He gives me a nervous smirk.

  “I’d imagine she’d give you hell for calling her Mrs. Kent.”

  “Not funny.”

   “I’m doing my best not the flip out right now. Less than 20 minutes ago my son that you failed to tell me about ran into the room and you can’t even look me in my eye and admit that you weren’t going to say anything!”

“I WASN’T GOING TO TELL YOU!”

Clark’s face falls and clearly he’s hurt.

  “You wanted the truth there it is. The other side of that truth is that I had changed my mind. Forget that you’ve not been awake a full 24 hours yet and this is not just something you shout out. This is why I wanted to talk to you alone when you arrived. My son...”

 “Our son.”

I ignored the flutter of my heart at hearing him claim Kalen. The flutters reminded me of a time when all he had to do was be in the same general vicinity for me to feel them. I pushed it back down, I no longer have the time for these feelings.

  “Am I to believe you were actually going to tell me? Excuse me if I’m not apt to believe that, considering you have been doing your best to push me away.”

 “Believe me or not Kal. You are going to believe whatever you want. At the end of the day I have done everything in my power to keep MY son safe. I’ll be damned if I apologize for keeping the child that I pushed out of my body safe. You Kal-El slash Clark Kent slash asshole can go fuck yourself.”

Surprisingly he starts laughing at me.

 “The fuck is so funny?”

 “You only break out my Kryptoian name when you are pissed at me.”

If he only knew how pissed I was, he wouldn’t be making fun of me.

  “You can stop laughing Clark. This shit ain’t funny. Do you understand what people will think given his age? What those on this team have already thought? Let me give you a hint. They think I’m a dirty hoe or did you forget about the fact that nobody knows the timeline about how this happened? How I could call myself Lois’ friend? How do you think she will respond once she finds out you have a child with someone that’s not her?”

  “But Gia we did not cheat together.”

 “I know that, you know that. Nobody else does! To the world you were and still are Clark Kent and Lois Lane the Daily Planet power couple and me I was the lowly barista who slept with you. A dirty whore.”

 “Don’t CALL YOURSELF THAT!”

I scoffed at his anger. 

 “Why not Clark? That exactly what you reduced me to. Me. I can live with you walking out my life. I made peace with losing you. It’s always been her over me, and that’s the card I have been dealt. What I won’t do however is watch you come into his life and then leave again to save face after she and the world tells you it’s wrong.”

  “What makes you think I would leave our son behind? I care less of what the world thinks of me.”

  “It’s not the world I worry for anymore Kal. It’s the people that you love I worry about. I won’t let you break his heart.”

Clark looks at me, his anger radiating from him, as his chest puffs out and walks closer to me.

  “WHY DO YOU BELIEVE I WOULD ABANDON MY SON?!”

  “BECAUSE YOU ABANDONED ME! You are capable of breaking hearts because YOU BROKE MINE!”

Realization dawns on him and he tries to move closer to me. I toss up the strongest shield I am capable of. Clark can’t  get through, and just holds his hand against the invisible barrier. His forehead drops against it. 

  “Let me in Gia. Please.”

I hadn’t even realized the tears had come back. I shook my head no.

  “I can’t Clark. Besides this is no longer about us. It’s about Kalen. Now your son is waiting for you to read him a bedtime story. I am going to bed, goodnight.”

  “Gia...please just talk to me...”

  “We can discuss telling Kalen about you in the morning. Goodnight Clark.”

I walked away, the shield still holding strong. Thankfully he didn’t follow as I locked myself in my room.

Once inside memories I had long sense suppressed came to the surface.

*Flashback* Nearly four years ago

I woke up slightly disoriented. The only thing that I knew for certain was the soreness in between my legs. As I adjusted to the light streaming in my newly acquired solo apartment, I rolled on my back, my nudity covered by my beige sheets, the comforter sprawled across my floor. The night's events came rushing back to me all at once. The memories of feeling Clark’s hands on me, roaming the expanse of my body, the feeling of his strong, hard body in between my legs,  the cries of my multiple climaxes as my nails ran down his muscled back.

I spent the night with Clark.

I was still trying to wrap my head around what had happened, but I still also wanted to live in this moment. Reminiscing on how wonderful it had been to lay with him. 

Thinking of him made me wonder where the man himself had gone? My bed was cold enough to indicate he had been gone for a while, at least not in bed with me.

 “Clark?”

I called out softly, knowing if he was nearby he would hear me. I heard no response nor did he appear. I looked around the bedroom, taking note that my clothes were still scattered while his were gone. 

‘No big deal, he was Superman he couldn’t exactly wait until I woke up to go save the world.’

With that in mind I got up to take a hot shower once out I spent the day floating in a cloud until it got later and later in the day and he hadn’t reappeared. Then the next day when he wouldn’t call or text me back letting one week went by as I became steadily more depressed. I wasn’t sure what was wrong? Had I been that trash in bed that he had to ghost me? I mean even if it wasn’t as good for him as it had been for me, I mean we could work on that, what was burning me up was that at the bottom of it all was that we were better than this. I thought he was better than this.  It was almost a week to the hour since Clark and I had fallen into bed, and I had just finished watching Love and Basketball, wiping stray tears away. I had blown through my snacks and I needed more before I started watching Love Jones. I decided to make a run to the store. 

Donned in yoga pants, an old t-shirt and a men’s hoodie that I fell in love with from the Goodwill , I walked to the store. My apartment wasn’t far from the coffee shop where I worked along with a bunch of other cute little shops. I found my convenience store. Settling for the chocolate brownie Ben and Jerry’s along with Gummy Bears and chips. I headed back to my apartment, looking down at my phone, scrolling Instagram, when a shop door opens in front of me. The guys coming out of the bike shop apologize but I don’t care because upon looking up I see Clark spinning Lois in his arms, her head tipped back in a laugh as her red delicately curled  hair swung around. 

My breath catches in my chest as he leans down and kisses her soundly on the lips. 

I almost dropped my bag. I literally feel my heart break, I think Clark must hear it break because he looks up spotting my face from the under the hoodie. His guilt hits me full force furthermore confirming what I am seeing,  but it gets buried under my emotions. 

I back away from where they are coming toward me, finding an alleyway. He can’t follow me without looking suspicious to Lois. I jump from building to building, sliding down the fire escape and into my hallway, where I let myself into my apartment and tried to block out the rage and pain I felt, cutting on my movie as I intended before I left. Shutting down was the only thing I knew how to do properly.

*3 hours later*

I fell asleep on the couch, my package of Lorna Doone cookies sitting open on the coffee table, I almost screamed upon seeing a darkened figure standing in the corner of my room. It was only the familiar scent that calmed me, then pissed me off.

 “What in the fuck are you doing here?”

Clark came out of the corner of my living room and I waved my hand, the lights coming on in the apartment. Dressed in the same blue plaid shirt and Henley, with jeans I saw him in earlier with...her.

  “Well I’ve been trying to call you for two hours and when you didn’t answer I got nervous. So I came over.”

I glared at him. 

  “So let me get this straight. You, Kal-El have sex with me over, how many days ago...what is it now, like 7 days and then ghost me. No explanation or anything, and in the middle of your ghosting, you  run into me. Then let me guess, you decide you need a booty call from the side chick, call me and when I don’t jump when you say jump , NOW you get nervous. “

I scoff and say

 “Pfft, Clark I think you should go.”

 “Gia. I owe you an apology. I never meant to hurt you. It wasn’t supposed to go that far.”

 “Good to know you didn’t plan to break my back and then leave.” I scoff with an eye roll.

  “I’m serious Gia. I am sorry. I got so caught up and then Lois came back into town the next day wanting to work it out. She and I have been through too much to leave it on the table.”

  “But you will sacrifice my feelings though.”

  “It’s not like that. I care about you Gia, so so much. I haven’t called because to be honest, I look at you and see how this will hurt you and Lois. I came to tell you that I think it’s best if we don’t see each other. At least for right now, just until Lois and I can get settled.”

I was crushed, the man I loved was the one breaking my heart. 

  “You will never be settled if you lie to her.”

  “I will tell her eventually, Gia it’s just temporary.”

I glared at him, and walked into my kitchen. Clark watched as I drank a glass of water. I gave myself a minute to compose, then said some of the hardest words to come out of my mouth.

  “No it’s not temporary.” I sigh 

  “Yes, yes it is Gia. Besides you deserve to have a chance to live your life. You have been wrapped up in my Superhero business since I rescued you. You deserve to enjoy the life you clawed your way to without me around. Just let me handle the bad people out there for now. Maybe you can find someone to love you just as you without the baggage I bring.”

The ‘ because I don’t love you ‘ hung in the air like smoke and the fact that he couldn’t even say it out loud pissed me off. He even thought he could tell me to give up Midnight. She being an extension of me, it told me he didn’t care at all. He couldn’t have asked that of me if he did.

  “I said it’s not temporary Clark. You see, I thought you would be different because you aren’t from Earth. Turns out your biological parents’ goal was accomplished because you are just like the rest of the men in the world Clark Kent. You get what you want and you leave. As women we give and give  until we are depleted. I gave to you until I was almost lost in the shadow of you.  I’m done giving to you Kal. I’m done waiting for you to realize I am not some fragile flower in need of your protection anymore. If cutting me out your life was so easy now, then who am I to think you won’t do it again when it’s convenient? Bold of me to assume you give two fucks about me at all. So when I say it’s not temporary, it’s because it’s not. This week without you proved one thing to me and that is that I don’t need or want you in my life anymore.”

  “But Gia I care I just...I mean just a few short weeks ago I was going to propose to Lois. I can’t just walk away from her. Why can’t you of all people understand that?”

I laugh again which only makes him nervous. I knew about the ring. He had shown me a while ago and while I ignored the flicker of pain, I had congratulated him and given him a proud hug. I had finally begun to make peace with Clark only being my friend. I was almost over the crush, then this had happened. 

Now he was not about to lay his guilt on me like all of this was my doing. I loved him more than I thought was possible, but I loved myself more, at least as of this moment I did.

   “Kal I understand perfectly.  I never asked you to choose between she and I. All I ever asked was that you be my friend. You can’t even manage that. Come on let’s face it, you’ve been pulling away from me  for a while. I am tired of digging my heels in the dirt, begging you to return my friendship as you had in the past. So I agree it’s best we do not see each other, but this time Kal-El make it permanent. Get out of my life and don’t EVER come back.” 

His face fell, I imagined the tears in his eyes, probably to make myself feel better about all of this. 

  “Gia. I don’t mean forever.”

  “It’s not up for discussion because I do. I mean forever. Enjoy building your perfect life with Lois. I hope she is all the friend you will ever need, maybe you will make more, better than how you’ve treated me, but to be honest I don’t care if she is or not. Please leave my apartment and don’t come back.”

   “Gia.” He says his voice almost pleading.

  “GET OUT NOW KAL- EL!”

I said finally frustrated with him. I was on the verge of tears. I can't break down with him here. I needed him to go.

 “I’ll go Gia because it’s what you’ve asked of me, but I can’t not see you as in forever. I am...not... that strong.” 

I imagined I could feel his disappointment and heartbreak. I knew I was trying to make myself feel better.

   “You are going to have to be. Besides Don’t be so dramatic, I am only giving you what you wanted from the beginning when you asked me if I had anywhere to go. I’m setting you free of me for good just like you would have the night you rescued me. Goodbye Kal-El.”

I couldn’t even look at him, I shut off all incoming emotions as he stood there looking at me for another minute or so. Finally he opens the front door.

  “Goodbye Gia.”

As soon as the front door closes I slid to the kitchen floor. Face in my hands, knees almost touching my chest as I cried, the position reminding me of the night he found me and asked me to trust him. I did and look where it got me.

How did I lose my best friend and the man I loved in one night?

I was stupid to even let them become the same person. The worst part was that subconsciously I knew this would be the outcome. Okay maybe not the whole sex thing but even still I ignored my gut, and latched onto the idea that he loved me the way I loved him and I gave him a part of me that I could not get back. 

I could never fully forget Clark Kent because he had been my first. I knew I would always love him, he could just never know that...

*End Flashback*

We had no clue about the life we created the same night I lost my virginity to him. He wore protection and I was on birth control, so I still don’t know how Kalen came to be, but every time my son looks at me I am grateful. I would go through heartbreak again and again if it meant he didn’t feel an ounce of pain. Seeing Clark again after all these years had only proved I had buried the hurt, not gotten over it. 

I had to keep Clark at a distance at least from me. I had to stick to my decision that was made a long time ago and that was to not give a damn about this situation. 

My son had to be the priority. I couldn’t handle it if he wasn’t...

A/n: So what do you think? I hope it was enjoyable despite the heavy angst....

Love you all!! And remember the taglist is open just let me know -Singeramg

TAGLIST:

@bloodyinspiredfuck​ @romyr4​

[murasaki-murasame]

After two full months of waiting, enough for me to have 600 goddamn summons hoarded up, Gala Leif has finally been released, and even though I probably should have waited to get an idea of how good all the new units are, I decided to immediately summon on the gala anyway.

I’ll go over all of what I can remember from my summons under the cut, but TL;DR: I got every new banner unit and I still have 330 summons left >:3c

Before the gala summons, I also used the 5-star adventurer/dragon vouchers I got from the royal regimen endeavors, which got me a dupe Xander, a dupe Mikoto, two dupe Louises, a dupe P-Siren [now at 1UB], a dupe Freyja [now my second copy’s at 3UB], and I think the third dragon was maybe a Nidhogg or something but I don’t remember.

As for the gala itself, the new units I got were:

-Gala Leif [!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

-Two copies of the Xuan Zang alt [one of them was from within my first ten single vouchers lol]

-Zhu Bajie [I got Leif after 220 summons and then I decided to keep going for this dude, who I thankfully got after just 50 more summons]

-Four copies of Tie Shan Gongzhu [Since I got so many copies of her I decided to use a few sunlight stones to get a MUB copy of her while having a 0UB one left over. I tend to run my two copies of Freyja at the same time pretty often in my wind team, so I figured it’d be worth having two copies of her. I still have eight sunlight stones left over anyway]

-Andromeda [I dunno if I’ll ever use her but it’s cool to get her]

And these are the dupes I got that I can remember:

-Lathna [I swear to god I’ve gotten a dupe Lathna from like every single gala since she came out]

-Grace [Guess who I got from the last dream summon lol]

-S-Celery

-S-Julietta [She’s quickly becoming one of my dreaded dupes to get, especially since I didn’t get Gala Elly when she came out]

-Gala Sarisse [I think I’ve somehow gotten like three copies of her in total at this point]

-Arctos [I have him MUB already so this is just gonna be a second copy now]

-Kagutsuchi [now at 1UB]

-OG Siren [now at 1UB]

-Epimetheus [now at 3UB]

-Garuda [now at 1UB]

-Shinobi [now my second copy’s at 3UB]

-Freyja [like I said with the other Freyja dupe I got, my second copy’s now at 3UB]

-Simurgh [now at 1UB]

-Nimis [now at 1UB]

-Nyarlathotep [now at 3UB]

That’s all I remember but there were probably a few more, lol.

Anyway, I haven’t had much time to use them yet, but I actually feel more excited about the new light units than Leif himself. I honestly can’t figure out what role Leif is meant to play in the wind meta. In spite of having a shield stance, his only real defense utility is a 60% defense buff that only applies to himself, and other than that he has lots of attacking skills that apparently do a lot of damage, unique attack combos that are basically the same as the chefs but he only needs a 6+ combo to activate it, and a whole bunch of entirely offensive abilities. I wouldn’t be surprised if he ends up being a top-tier wind DPS unit, but it feels like he’s intended to play a defensive role even though he doesn’t really have anything in his kit to support that. I think his big self-only defense buff has a good shot at letting him cheese part stuff like HMC’s waterfall, but that only applies to himself.

In general I dunno who he’d replace on my wind team for stuff like soloing eCiella. Unless I can get by without T-Hope’s team defense buffs, I might be able to get rid of Ranzal and just share his S1 for the dispel, but I dunno.

I really hope he doesn’t end up falling into obscurity due to not having enough in the way of unique utility to make him stand out, but he seems like he at least does way more damage than Gala Ranzal, so that’s nice, lol.

But aside from him, the new light units honestly all look extremely good. I think they’re definitely going to shake up the light meta a lot more than Leif will do for wind, but it’ll still be a while before shadow Agito comes out in the first place.

I only have a vague idea of what some of the damage mods are for all the new units, but I’m hearing that Xuan Zang’s S1 does a surprisingly high amount of damage, at least in it’s upgraded form. Her S2 AoE zone also looks way bigger than what other units with that type of skill get, so it’ll probably be a lot easier for her to reliably include all her teammates in it. Apparently her force strike also works more like a staff force-strike, so that’s neat. I think she might actually trump Peony in the DPS sim just due to raw damage mods, but she also provides a lot of defensive utility via her S1 strength debuff, and her S2 shadow res buff, so that might edge her out as well in a way that wouldn’t be reflected in something like the DPS sim. Also she can reduce the enemy’s paralysis resistance but I don’t know the numbers on that, or how much it’d really impact a paralysis team.

Zhu Bajie also seems even better in practice than I thought he’d be, lol. He plays a lot like the Monster Hunter units due to his unique force-strike which basically works in the exact same ways theirs do, and unlike how axe force strikes normally work, it works more like a lance force-strike. So he ends up not playing like an axe unit at all, which is interesting. And on top of all that stuff, he also has enmity scaling on his S1, and he can reduce his health with his S2 like Natalie can. I saw that his S1 gets up to a max of like 1900% damage mods, which is really good, even if you won’t really get that high in practice. His force-strike also has really high SP gain, enough to fill his S1 in two force-strikes [which takes like five or so seconds], so it feels like it’s gonna be really easy to spam, which makes the high damage mods even better. His force-strike also seems to have a 460% paralysis punisher damage mod added onto it when it’s fully charged, so that might make a real impact on his overall damage. He also gets Resilient Offense, which is a really good ability in general, but it might be hard to trigger it multiple times since his S2 makes it so you can’t heal him for 10 seconds. His S1 also inflicts stun, which might be good in certain situations but stun tends to be pretty unreliable. I think he’s going to pair extremely well with the Xuan Zang alt, since her strength debuffs and shadow res buffs will make it way easier for him to tank hits while at low health.

Sorta like how the Xuan Zang alt makes me feel way better about having skipped Peony, Zhu Bajie makes me feel better about having skipped all the Monster Hunster units [mainly Vanessa], lol. Vanessa still has her own unique defensive stuff going on, but I feel like Zhu Bajie plays extremely similarly to her in spite of being an axe unit, so that’s cool.

I’m a little salty that Sha Wujing is another light lance instead of a light healer, but honestly his kit looks really good, and he’ll probably see more use this way than if he was a healer, lol. His main appeal is basically that he has a defense debuff zone on his S2, which is really nice in general, though his two abilities are about buffing his damage, so maybe his S1 will let him do a lot of damage as well. The thing that’s really interesting to me, though, is that his S2 is a shared skill you can give to other characters, which I really didn’t see coming, since they’d actively avoided letting you skill share any other defense debuff zone skills. He might end up being a really useful skill share option for certain fights, especially stuff like speedrun comps where you want to stack as many strength buffs and defense debuffs as you can right away.

Also it’s extremely funny to me that since he’s a featured 4-star in a gala banner, he wound up having extremely high appearance rates [7% normally, and 40% on the final summon in a tenfold], which basically means that any amount of summoning on this gala is gonna lead to you getting like a million copies of this dude, lol. I think in the 270 summons I did, I got like 15-20 copies of him, with there being multiple instances of me getting like three copies of him in a single tenfold. It’s not a big deal or anything, and he seems to be a really good unit so it’s nice that he’s really easy to get, but it’s funny to me how much he’s been plaguing everyone’s summons.

Tie Shan Gongzhu also looks like she’s gonna be the go-to dragon for basically any light support unit, so that’s cool. She doesn’t have a heal skill, but we already have Cupid for that.

I don’t know all of their damage mods and SP costs and stuff yet, and it’ll be a little while before the DPS sim updates to include them, but I think they’re going to be top-tier light units. Hopefully they don’t get powercrept by the time shadow Agito comes out, lol. Either way this is exactly what the light element’s been desperately needing after like six months of Oops! All Limited!

Which is also why I’m really really happy that they decided to put these characters on rate-up along with Gala Leif, since it meant I was able to get them along with Leif, instead of having to skip their banner entirely to save for the next gala. I hope they make this a trend going forward. I think GBF does this a lot with their galas, so maybe they’re shifting to this model for galas now. This just seems like a net positive all around, and it means I feel like I’m missing out less by hoarding exclusively for gala banners.

Anyway this banner treated me extremely well, which is a huge relief after how bad my experience with the Gala Alex banner was. I was worried that the 600 summons i had saved up wouldn’t be enough to get Leif, but I managed to get at least one copy of everyone in less than 300 summons, so that’s great.

I guess now my short-term goal is to just skip all the non-limited banners between now and the next gala. So we’ll just see how that goes. I have a feeling we’ll get a rerun of the Daikokuten banner in the next month or two, which might really tempt me since I didn’t get Daikokuten or Nobunaga when they came out, but I don’t know if they interest me enough to chase after that, especially with monthly galas seeming to be a thing now.

[popculturebuffet]

Reviewcaps: Star Vs: Club Snubbed

Dance week kicks off!  I finally advance in the tomtrospective as Star makes the critical mistake of listening to ponyhead and causes a dad fight that threatens to spill into an international incident unless she and Tom can get along. Tom dosen’t know how to be nice under the cut. 

And we’re back! As I put in my latest amphibia review a combination of a busy few weeks and other things to cover has kept me from doing more reviews, and as such I left this on the backburner. But I decided that just ain’t right so this week, i’m not only bringing back the tomtrospective, but i’m doing a whole bundle of dance themed episodes because as i’ve made clear in the past, and making clear for you I love em. I never went to my own school dances and the one dance I went to for Demolay was fun enough, so that mixed with the shipping, hilariaty and usual good quality brought to these affairs made me want to do a theme week after Owl House last week, but ennui made me reconsider. So now i’m re-reconsidering. Lucky you! With that we can move on.  Unlike the last few tom reviews, this one.. takes place after about 80 pounds of plot have happened, so it’s time for a fuck ton of exposition to refresh your memories:  PREVIOUSLY ON STAR VS:

OH GOD WHY OKAY i GET IT THE GAG’S OVER... MOVING ON TO THE ACTUAL EXPOSITION. YEESH But yeah since we could largely sidestep the main story since tom came in literally before it in season 1 and it was irrelvant to him in season 2, I have a lot to cover.  Over the last two seasons, Toffee, a septarian warrior who assinated moon’s mom despite her almost brokering peace between monsters and mewman when Moon was just a teenager, plotted and schemed to destroy all magic, having star nuke the wand to spilit it in half, manupliating ludo from the inside of his half and then using his new existance as pure magic to slowly destroy it from the inside while using ludo as a puppet when necessary. Meanwhile , Star started to catch feelings for Marco just as Marco was getting somewhere with his crush Jackie Lynn Thomas, who star was being his wing man with unaware of her own feelings. This came to a head when a dance, yes another one, happened where Jackie asked Marco out on their first proper date, Star was jealous but couldn’t figure out why and this distracted her enough to let Ludo sneak in with his army of rats and then take the book.  Stars parents, in a suprising move for her mom more than her dad, accepted what happened and trusted her, though Moon started covertly working to get the book back under the nose of her allies in the magical high comission. Meanwhile Toffee revealed himself, while Star finally did realize her feelings for marco and proceded to supress them.  This all came to a head in the last two episodes of season 2: First Star had her song day, which meant having a song wirtten about her which was honest.. a bit too honest as it revealed her parents hiding the book, leading to the people being upset with our king and queen and the commission understadanbly being pissed Moon didn’t tell them sooner. Oh and the song also, without star’s consent, revealed she’s intrested in marco... right in front of Marco. And this part is actually really important to today’s episode but we’ll get to that.  Star continued to deny having feelings for Marco instead of working through them as the school year ended, while Moon and the comisson lead a raid on the monster castle, which will also be important later, TOffe was headquartered in. Things quickly went pear shaped, with Toffee easily murdering most of the comission, including moon by sucking out their life force to increase his own power, since their all made of magic, and only lekmet, the comisson’s wise sorta leader and team healer, surivived, using the last of his own life force to save moon before ending up as a pile of dust and a horn with Moon quickly escaping with the rest of her allies.. and Toffee omniously saying he was coming for Star and his finger.  Moon naturally panicked and told star they were leaving, possibly forever, for her own saftey, and Star confessed how she felt to Marco.. in front of Jackie> Which is never dealt with even when Jackie comes back. 

Also this confession isn’t dealt with until near the tail fucking end of season 3. God dammit star vs , just god damn. Anyways Moon tried to both hide star and ressurect her commrades, while a miserable Marco headed back to mewnit o find her only to get captured with river when Ludo, under toffe’s advisment, took hte castle.. and not under his advisment destroyed the book and it’s keeper and local asshat glossaryck.  Star eventually said “Fuck that” to “Hide and hope he never finds us” moon learned some lessons about racial tolerance she promptly unlearned next season, and Star dove into her wand with Ludo’s help, as Ludo had started to catch on to the frequent blackouts. Turns out that was toffe’s plan as he apparently kills star, and finished off magic and now restored, just casually walks off after easily taking out star’s allies.. including a greiving moon and marco. Also marco punches a whole in his chest. 

But STar manages to restore magic, unlock her butterfly form and reduce Toffee to a puddle of goo which Ludo finished off.. which also means moon’s attempt to dicker Eclipsa out of freedom just got undone. Yayyyy! I mean oh no.. no no I mean yay. She’s the best part of season 3.  So ALLL of that was to get to the status quo at this point: Marco goes home after a few weeks where again, the confession thing? Never brought up, while Star vows to stay to be a better princess. And yeah this does bring up one of Season 3′s biggest issues as despite Marco having dimensional scissors, the show constnatly acts like he can’t you know visit or vice versa. They just use the other dimension thing as a lazy excuse to write the earth side cast out even though....

I went with a Picard  one because why not. I get it being HARD for either ot make time for the other.. but make that a PLOT POINT instead of saying “oh you have to pick one”. Because it makes no fucking sense. Especially since star can still CALL THEM, so there’s no sense in them being absent from each other’s lives. Just schedule. Jesus. And it only gets WORSE from there.  Yeah see Season 3 is where the quality starts to get... 50/50. And unlike Amphibia where the last few weeks before marcy have been more one mediocre episode and one great episode the qulaity here is more “some great episodes, some utter abominations of episodes that destroy character or any semblance of plot” and some just okay ones too. Thankfully the first few from the season we have to cover for Tom, for the boy, are really good.. but we’ll get into the shit soon enough.. and somebody’s gotta shovel it. And so it might as well be me. But for now instead of shoveling horse crap we’re shoveling giant piles of sugar so pitter patter, let’s get at er, this is club snubbed.  It’s 2017, a winter’s ball and the butterfly family.. is actually not doing great, as most of the other kingdoms seem to view them as week for the whole rat invasion thing.. or at least the spider bites do. Yup this is where we meet the king, queen and daughter penelope. Aka two assholes who are dumb and I hate them and their precious daughter who I hope overthrows them. To thorw back to my loud house reviews, I hate them more than rusty. And look at him. LOOK AT HIM. 

The one in the center. Look at him. LOOK AT HIM.  Okay my irational hatred of the little prick, which isn’t entirely irrational aside the spider bites are rude, condescending, and really need to be overthrown so Penelope can take their throne. I just hate htem.. but unlike Rusty they don’t show up as much and that’s literally all I can say nice about htem. Penelope seems nice and I wish she got more screentime and she has an intresting romance we’ll get into in a few episodes, but  they are just.. their the kind of people you don’t want to be trapped in a room with alone for a prolonged amount of time. The kind of married couple other married couples, I conjecture i’m single and very lonely mind, are awkwardly roped into spending time with and then have to get drunk to ignore them sniping at each other or that ends in a who’s afraid of virginia wolfe situation. Thankfully their barely in this episode I just felt like getting my hate out at them since i’m probably not covering surviving the spider-bites for a while.  Anyways while they snipe at River who fires back “They were really big rats’ and I mean.. who does that.. who comes to someone elses house and tells htem they suck under their breath.. I mean rich assholes obviously, I answered my own question there but at least do it at your own house or on the carraige ride home sheesh. Your lucky river didn’t elbow drop both of you. It’s what you deserved.  Okay enough bitching about this stuff, the asshole kingdom, and penelope, along with all the other kingdoms of mewni are here for the silver bell ball, an annual tradition to reinvgorate the ties between kingdoms. It’s also how star and tom met, and that’s the topic of discussion with Star and her best friend, Pony Head... of the pony heads. Why yes a major chacter on this show is a talking horses head who acts like a mean teenage girl. And why no I have no idea where her species food goes or how she digests it, I frankly don’t want to know. Some things are better left unknown.  Anywho yeah this is my first review with ponyhead in it and she’s a divisive character to say the least. Some hate her , some love her, some REALLY hate her.. me.. I find her 50/50. Sometimes she can be really funny and entertaining and a good counterpoint to star, other time she’s obnoxious and a waste of hte wonderful Jenny Slate’s talents. This time she’s more obnoxious as this entire plot is partly her fault, btu we’ll get to that. We do get her and star scoping out the other royals, though Star’s unintresteds since she knows all of them, and Pony is only intersted because Larry kelpbotom got hot.. just like archie. And he’s got abs, just like archie. Two sentences I never would’ve said for years and years but that’s what Riverdale does to you. Back on topic the two talk Tom’s transparent absence and them having met and ponyhead having predicted drama. the two then horse around a bit before moon dickishly shushes them. Star only goes along with it because she’s trying to be a better princess, hence her staying on mewni at all now the danger’s passed, but yeah... even with moon’s backstory this moment just.. isn’t every plesant. Because while her backstory explains al ot, it dosen’t forgive how she treats star at times, as all star was doing here was being a normal teenage girl and not kicking her door down or anything. Star greets the other princes and princesses, including penelope, all of who I wish had more screentime. “Sigh” It’s then we get TOM. Horay!. And his family! Double horay, Queen Wrathmelor Lucitor and King Dave Lucitor. And yes I love how , just like the prince of the underworld is named Tom, the king, even if by marraige presumibly, is named dave. King Dave. I love it. Dave is a normal sized guy while his wife is giant.. and I can conjecture how they had tom but this isn’t hte place for that. The point is their perfectly lovely people, and I like that they zigged from where they were likelky orignally going with tom having abusive parents. INstead as far as I can figure they merley spoiled him and that combined with growing up in the unusual enviroment of the underworld and their own unresolved anger issues meaning they never thought to teach him how to deal with them properly. More on this later.  Anyways tom is here and in shades, because his parents are good people and River warmly greets the lucitors. IT’s time for the ball to get underway. 

Glad you asked. Basically each prince or princess asks each other prine or princess to dance, until everyone's dance with everyone. Simple. However suprisingly for him, Tom picks princess Jags to dance first. It’s then Pony ruins everything because she’s Ponyhead, and i’ts her special life skill. She tells Star tom’s “Club Snubbing” her... basically showing intrest in other girls to specifically act like he isn’t intrested.. which to be fair....

DOES sound like something Tom would do.. and what Pony’s doing to Larry because she’s a terrible person. It isn’t what he’s doing, we’ll get to the why at the right time, but it’s not unfair of star to suspect that. 

So Star decides to get even, pettily, by dancing with rich and talking him up and each keeps picking the other royals.. which worries dave and river because of course it does. And yeah star is being petty here... but I get it and sympahtise with it. Tom’s pulled some really manipulative shit the last few times he’s been around and she’s likely sick of it. She probably even got second hand sick of hearing what he did to marco. 

So she’s probably just fed up with his bullshit.. and she still DOES think he’s cute, as was made clear by his first proper apperance, she’s just tired of him being a jackass about perusing her when she’s no longer intrested. Which is fair. Tom is trying to be better.. but i’ts understandable why Star thinks he’s just still doing the same old shit just on a diffrent day.  So it comes down to both of htem with Moon hoping star dances with tom.. and naturally, still pissy she dances with Manfried , the butterflies butler, who’se delighted.. a bit too happy.. someone call the police.  Anyways Dave and River start to argue over whose club snubbing who.. as I said Tom has his dad, and his moms but again future episodes, anger. Dave is more controlled because he’s had more life experince but it’s clear enough stress can cause him to snap, as we see here.. he just dosen’t have his son’s demonic powers thank god.. he is clearly built under those robes though.. or at least you know skinny but a bit muscular. I mean otherwise Wrath would be a widow after tom’s conception. 

But tom just.. walks out sadly instead of reacting which further pisses star off and she follows. But this time as i’ve been making clear.. Tom has genuinely changed. He’s NOT doing some creepy scheme to manipulate her into taking him back, he learned from last time.. and from song day. See I told you it was important. He figured she was with Marco now, and isn’t mad as he puts it.. he saw it as a wake up call. She’s not into him and probably won’t be.. granted I thought he’d already learned that lesson, but i’ll let it pass. The point is he decided to give her space by not asking her and would’ve if she asked him. He was genuinely trying to be nice and respectful to her. And here’s where I can finally stop shit talking tom for the most part which thank god. I love the guy, I wouldn’t be retrospectiving him if I didn’t love this character and see him as my own surrogate fictoinal son. But I had to be honest and who Tom is at first, isn’t a good person.. but this episode and others give more weight as to the why, as well as show him genuinely TRYING. He wants to be better he just dosen’t know how... as is highlighed with star not wanting to be ignored, and Tom flipping out in a demonic rage  “I DON’T KNOW HOW TO BE NICE, AT LEAST GIVE ME CREDIT FOR TRYING”.  Which is what I put a pen in earlier with his parents; His parents are genuinely nice good people.. but the underworld is a diffrent, dangerous place with diffrent standards. So they likely didn’t realize their son had a troubling anger problem because of that, because a lot of the underworld is wild and vicious, until he started harassing star and doing something that raised a real red flag passed normal underworld standards. The two then quack quack bicker bicker in the sky, with an extra sized extra angry cloudy. CLOUDY YAY.. until a chair passes throught he window.  Our heroes run in to see the dad fight as esccalated to a wrestling match, and is about to esclate to an international incident. Star, seeing this can’t possibly end well, finally asks tom to dance which he agrees to not wanting to see a large bearded man beat up his dad. Probably how Domink Mysterio felt a few weeks ago honestly. And his entire life.  And then we get the dance.. and it’s fucking gorgeous. It’s slow and methodical, with the two at first doing this reluctnatly.. but as it goes on their walls break and the two genuinely have fun and it turns from two exes stiffly doing a dance to keep their dads from killing each other,... to somethin genuinely romantic and visually gorgeous as butterflies and flames errupt from their repsective feet before carrying them into the air and creating a beautiful tornado together. Disney really knows how to do a good dance sequence... maybe not gay representation until last week, and even then they had to be dragged into it more on that another time, but .. damn if they can’t animate pretty. It’s a genuinely beautiful sequence and easily tops the one from Blood Moon Ball.. not an easy feat mind as I say this with no bisas. I may not LIKE starco, at least not without some heavy continuity revisions.. but that dance was objectively good and so’s this one. The two land, moon rings the fucking bell to end things because again sh’es kind of a dick, and Wrathmelor causes earthquakes with her claps and reign of lava mom tearfs. Aww what a sweetheart. 

So Tom asks star for a corn shake, which she accepts, aww and Ponyhead is carried out by an entorauge. Eugh. The two laugh adorably together at her shenanigans, for some reason, to close out the episode.  Final Thoughts: Excellent even better than I remembered.. though it still has one or two problems, like what tom’s really doing being kinda obvious based on his body laungauge and middle part being mildly repeititive. But it’s all overridden by great character work, goregous animation and some neat world building as we meet the rest of mewni , most for the first time. I do genuinely wished they’d done more with them. And honestly.. tom and star are more adorable than I remembered. I think a combinaton of star’s later actions and the fact i wanted my starco dammit and figured tom wouldn’t last, I was mostly wrong as it took almost two full seasons for them to break up and we’ll get to that, so I had no real investment. I was annoyed he was seemingly just being throwni n the way as an obstacle to the main ship hwen they clearly changed their minds and he became more.. and then exactly that later because I can’t have nice things. We’ll get to that. But yeah a solid, enchanting episode and a good start to dance week. If you have a star vs episode you want me to review, just hit me up in akss or subits or comission it directly using those same options, or any other cartoon for that matter and follow me for more reviews as I cover Amphibia every week and will return to regular ducktales coverage at the end of september. Tom will return shortly. Until then stay safe, wear a mask, and later days. 

[raywritesthings]

Classically Trained

My Writing Fandom: Arrow Pairing: Laurel Lance/Oliver Queen (Eventual) Characters: Laurel Lance, Ted Grant, Oliver Queen, Sara Lance, Quentin Lance, Team Arrow, Eobard Thawne Summary: The Dollmaker meets unexpected resistance when enacting his plan to destroy Detective Lance's soul, and Laurel ends up meeting a needed friend. Notes: Older Ted Grant, Metahuman Laurel Lance *Can be read on my AO3 or FFN, links are in my bio*

Laurel had never been more terrified. Not when she’d been attacked by the Triad in her own apartment, not during the staged prison riot at Iron Heights, not when Vanch had taken her hostage to use as bait against the Hood and not even when she’d been trapped under the rubble in the quake. Even though she’d felt for certain she was going to die before Tommy had come to save her.

Any of those instances, she could have died, and died with dignity. This, what the Dollmaker planned to do to her...this was a horror that went beyond death.

“Look at her. She's so lovely,” Mathis said as he leaned in close to her face. Laurel’s breathing picked up, audible with the tube stuck down her throat. God, she could feel his breath and it was sickening. “Maybe a little too much melanin in the skin, but...it's the imperfections that make art sublime.”

She couldn’t really process that backhanded compliment, not over her father’s pleading and the roar in her own ears. This was it. She was dying. No one was saving her this time. Not Tommy, not her father, not the Hood and not even Oliver and his military bodyguard. She’d lost or pushed people away too many times, and a maniac was going to kill her to destroy her father.

“She’s your world, she’s your very soul,” Mathis continued to wax poetic. Her father was shouting at him now. Laurel wanted to join him.

“I will kill you, you son of a bitch!”

She couldn’t do this to him. She couldn’t just die like this! Her chest hurt from the rapid heaves of breath she was taking and the hammering of her heart.

The white liquid started to filter down from Mathis’ contraption and up the tube. She was going to choke, and it would all be over for her in a few moments. Her whole life, reduced to a glassy-eyed doll for other people to look at and pity.

“Laurel, sweetheart...close your eyes,” her father begged, tears leaking from his own.

Laurel’s eyes did squeeze shut, but she wasn’t ready to go out quietly. She was tired of being helpless, tired of just existing as an object for other people to batter and use to their own ends, tired of bottling it all up and burying the pain and the anger deep inside.

So she screamed. Only it wasn’t just a scream.

The tube and the straps holding it to her face ripped away from her, hitting the opposite wall. Glass shattered on the table with his contraption and from the few lightbulbs above, raining down into her hair and stinging her cheek with tiny cuts.

Laurel coughed at the feel of the tube leaving her throat, and that was what ended it. Whatever it had been. She gasped for breath, looking around in wide-eyed shock. Nothing was like it had been.

Her father had slid to the ground, still strapped into place with his arms behind his back while his head hung down. She could make out the sound of him groaning.

Just to her left, Mathis was also sprawled. Red was leaking from his one ear, and it took Laurel a moment to register that meant blood.

Movement to her right near the table caused her to start; the Hood had just stood up. She didn’t even know when he’d gotten there, but he must have been using the table for cover.

Laurel coughed again. “What...what just happened?”

He stared at her, she thought. In the dim light left by Mathis’s Bunsen burner, his eyes were glinting. After a long pause, he finally answered, “I was going to ask you.”

What?

“Laurel,” her father stirred, struggling to rise back onto his feet. “Honey, are you okay?”

“I- I’m fine. I’m alive.” She was shaking, she realized, uncontrollably. No matter what had happened, she was okay. She wasn’t going to die.

The Hood went to her father and undid his bindings. The vigilante hung back as he rushed forward to her, taking the straps off her arms.

“I just don’t understand. I mean, how did you do it?” Her dad asked.

“Do what?”

“You didn’t- you didn’t see? Laurel, you- your voice or something, I don’t know. It nearly knocked me over if I hadn’t been tied to the pole!”

“Dad, that doesn’t make any sense,” she said. Her eyes searched out the Hood again, but this time he looked away. Then he started forward.

“Mathis!”

The serial killer was no longer sprawled on the ground but was crawling on hands and knees towards the nearest exit.

“Damnit, he’s getting away!” Her father yelled, fumbling for some kind of weapon.

“No, he isn’t,” a different distorted voice spoke. Feminine. The blonde woman from the other night jumped down from the rafters in front of Mathis, the staff she carried going under his chin. His neck snapped before any of them could so much as cry out.

Only when Laurel did, she saw it.

The air in front of her seemed to pulse with waves of volume, not far enough to reach the other woman, though her head turned sharply in Laurel’s direction with pure shock etched into the features she could make out. It mirrored Laurel’s own.

She stumbled back and nearly tripped over her own feet, the sound cutting off as she gasped. A hand flew over her mouth. “I don’t- I don’t know how that—” she mumbled behind it.

They were all just staring at her, wary, none of them approaching. Like she was diseased. She’d gotten herself out of danger, and somehow it was so much worse than being rescued.

Laurel turned and ran.

“Laurel!”

She didn’t turn back at her father’s shout and just kept going. When her feet started to hurt, she tore off the stupid heels she was wearing and carried them.

Everything was just so screwed up. The Hood has come to save her and her father, even after she had joined the task force hunting him down. He was a good person, or trying to be. What had happened last spring hadn’t been his fault, easier as it had been to just blame him. No, what had happened to Tommy had been her fault, just like whatever had just happened back at the Dollmaker’s hideout was her fault. What was so wrong with her?

Laurel sagged against a wall, breathing hard and too tired to go on any further. She had no idea where she was, but it looked like some forgotten corner of the Glades.

“Hey, you alright?”

She looked up. There was an older man across the alley standing at the back door of a building he looked to just be locking up.

Laurel shook her head, not sure if she trusted herself to speak. That weird scream could come back any moment for all she knew.

“Someone chasing you? Running away from a bad boyfriend? Need the police?” He checked, getting more shakes of the head from her. “Any reason you don’t want to talk to me? If it’s Stranger Danger, the name’s Ted Grant.”

Laurel swallowed. “I’m not scared of you.” Even if the guy looked ripped enough to be a member of the Queen family’s security detail, he held himself in a way that made him seem much more open. “I’m scared of me.”

He looked her over, and even though she could see him assessing her there wasn’t any kind of predatory edge to it. He turned and inserted his key back into the lock, opening the door again.

“Look, best to get this off the street. Especially these days.” She blinked and had to move fast to catch the keys when he flung them at her face after. “So you know you’re not trapped.”

“Right.” Laurel walked up to the door.

“Not bad reflexes, by the way,” he remarked.

“Thanks?”

When he turned the lights on, she got a better idea of why he might have commented on it. Laurel looked around the gym floor, the bags hanging at various intervals and the ring standing in the middle.

“So, what do I call you? You can pick a name,” he offered.

“Uh, Dinah,” said Laurel, cringing immediately afterward. Brilliant idea, pick her own name! Even if it wasn’t the name people commonly attached to her. But she was still too rattled to really concentrate. She should’ve gone with Sara, she realized, if it had to be a name she was familiar with.

Ted grinned. “Old-fashioned. I like it. Okay, Dinah, the first thing you gotta learn is, you can’t run from yourself. No one can. So what are you really running from?”

“I don’t know,” she answered, hugging her arms to herself. “It just happened.”

“What did?”

“Trust me, you don’t want to find out.”

If anything, his grin got wider. “Try me.”

Something about his brazen confidence was soothing at the same time it was aggravating. She knew he probably thought she was just some helpless, battered woman. Part of her wanted to prove him wrong.

Part of her wanted to know she wasn’t just going crazy.

Laurel turned away from him, trying her best to draw on some of that jumbled panic, fear and adrenaline still coursing through her system. There was a burn at the back of her throat, not painful but present, and somehow she just knew. She opened her mouth and screamed.

The posters on the far wall went flying and the heavy bags hanging at that end of the gym swung as if caught in a storm. Nothing shattered, thankfully.

“Do you see why I’m scared now?” She asked, looking over her shoulder at him.

“I’ll be damned, Dinah.” He was staring at her now, too, but though the shock was there it wasn’t tinged with fear. Not like with her father and the vigilantes. If anything, he looked awed. “What are you gonna do with that?”

—-

He waited too long.

By the time Oliver reacted, Laurel was out the door and far down the street. He hurried into the night, but with no way of knowing which direction she’d fled in, he was hopeless to pursue her.

“Where did she go?” Lance asked, gasping for breath in the doorway. “What just happened?”

Oliver remained silent. In all his years away and everything he had seen, nothing like that had ever been among it.

“It was Mathis. He- he must’ve done something to her while I was out,” Lance was deciding for himself now. “And we can’t ask him, damnit!”

The former detective whirled back around, but the warehouse was empty aside from the Dollmaker’s broken body. The woman in the black mask had taken her leave as well.

“My associate and I will track you daughter,” Oliver promised. Then he fired a grapple arrow to ascend to the roof of the building next door. He hurried into the night, eyes scanning the streets below on his way to the base. He found nothing.

Oliver’s mind was still half on thinking of places Laurel might have run to — her apartment? Her father’s? A police station? — when he entered the base to find Felicity and John waiting for him.

“So, we heard a lot on the comms,” Felicity began. “Could you elaborate on what it all meant?”

“I got there, and Mathis was getting ready to- to turn Laurel into a doll,” Oliver said, covering his wavering voice with a cough. “Something happened before I could intervene.”

“Was it our mysterious blonde? Thought we heard something like that sonic device she had on her the other night,” Digg said.

“She was there, but no. It wasn’t her. It was Laurel. She…” He didn’t even know how to describe it. “She screamed and it, it just was a force, it came from her—”

“What do you mean?” Felicity was wearing a quizzical half-smile, like he was talking nonsense. He felt like he was talking nonsense.

“I mean it forced the tube out of her throat and Mathis to the ground. His ears were bleeding.”

“Laurel did that with a scream?” John crossed his arms, dubious. “Oliver, that’s impossible.”

“It’s not impossible,” Oliver disputed. “I saw things. On the island. Not this, but...people are capable of more than we might think possible.”

John frowned. “How come you never mentioned that before?”

“Because it never meant good things,” he told them.

“So, what, you’re saying Laurel is bad now?” Asked Felicity.

“No,” Oliver answered immediately. He could never think that. It just didn’t make sense. It must have been Mathis’ doing, like Lance had said. Unless…

John had pointed out the similarity between the sound that had come from Laurel and the device the unknown woman carried. Why had she been there at all? Why had she been near Laurel’s office at all?

Now Laurel was out there, alone and terrified. He had to find her before she was hurt. Or worse, hurt someone by mistake.

And he had to find her before anyone else did.

—-

Ted had seen a few things as protector of the streets in his day, but this about took the cake. A woman with a scream to bring the house down. He couldn’t make this stuff up if he tried.

“What do you mean ‘what am I going to do with it’?” She asked, scoffing. “I don’t even know how I got it, and I don’t want it.”

“Don’t be so hasty. Look, I can see the bruises forming there on your wrists. Something happened to you, didn’t it? Or was going to.” She looked down now, ashamed. Ted worked to gentle his tone. “What got you out of it?”

Her chin lifted slightly, trembling. “Don’t you think I’m some kind of freak?”

He shook his head. “Freak’s not in my vocabulary.” There was something curious about her, though. Those fancy clothes and yet she looked like she’d been put through the mill the same as any of them in the Glades. And not just from whatever had nearly happened tonight.

“What I see is someone who was in a tight spot and figured her own way out of it. A way that might come in handy again. You never know.”

“Why do you care?” She was incredibly suspicious for someone her age. He could see the way she kept tensing at each show of goodwill. Who had hurt this girl so badly?

He shrugged. “I get a lot of people in here who feel lost, who need to work something out. Helping them is how I keep giving back to my city.”

“You think you can help me?”

“Depends. Are you looking for help?”

She looked ready to snap at him, maybe with that scream of hers, too. But then her shoulders drooped, and her mouth turned down in a frown so fundamentally unhappy. “I don’t know what I’m looking for. I just know I can’t- I can’t go back right now. There’s people who know, and they’ll be looking for me, and I just cannot deal with that right now.”

He nodded to himself. The truth was, he wasn’t comfortable sending her back out there to walk home, and none of the cabs drove around this area of the city at this time of night anymore. He walked over to the supply closet and picked out a hoodie and pair of sweatpants he thought would be in her size well enough. “You’ll want some of these. You alright with black?”

“Black’s fine. I- you don’t have to help me.”

“Nobody has to help anyone, Dinah. But that’s kind of the point. I keep a couple cots in the back for if people get carried away and knock each other out. Or themselves, sometimes. You can use one of those. Take a few days. Then tell me what you’re thinking.”

He set the clothes on a bench and started to head back to his office.

“Ted?”

He looked back around in time to catch the keys she’d flung back at him. Ted smirked. “Yeah?”

The closest thing to a smile he’d seen her wear all night rose on her lips. “Thank you.”

“Not a problem. Goodnight, Dinah.”

—-

Quentin was ready to rip out his hair. He’d gone back to the precinct, checked Laurel’s apartment and her office. Nothing, except her belongings some of the other beat cops had found along with his in the parking lot when Dollmaker had attacked them. Her phone was among them. He had no way of reaching her.

He’d been so stupid! Laurel was going through enough on top of Mathis’ sick attempt at revenge. She’d needed support, whatever the hell had happened to her. And he’d been too stunned to give it.

The first thing he did the next morning was to call the DA’s office. “Yeah, this is Officer Lance. I’m looking for my daughter.”

“I’m sorry, officer, Laurel called in this morning to say she was taking the week off. She cited personal reasons? In light of the attack on you both last night, we approved the absence.”

“Laurel called?”

“Yes, I spoke to her myself.”

She had access to a phone, then. That was something. Something good? He didn’t know. But she was out there, alive. That alone brought him relief.

“Alright, listen, if she calls back could you please tell her to call me? Thank you.”

He would keep looking in the meantime. If Laurel was hiding because she was scared or thought she’d done something wrong, he was going to be the first person to tell her otherwise. Maybe Mathis should’ve gone to jail again, but he certainly wasn’t mourning the creep after what he’d tried to do. And whatever that scream had been, they’d figure it out. They always had.

He just needed some help finding her was all. So he ducked out of the precinct and put in a call to Smoak.

“Officer Lance. Did you hear from your daughter?”

“No, and I’m guessing you haven’t either. Okay, I found out she called into her office to take off work for the week. They approved it, considering the abduction last night. But that means she’s somewhere with a phone. Can you do anything with that?”

“Not unless I had the number. I’m sorry, Officer Lance.”

He hung his head. He should’ve been expecting that. “No, that’s alright. Was worth a shot.”

“Well, at least we know Laurel is alive? Sorry, that came out worse than in my head.”

“It’s fine. Listen, I’m gonna do a sweep around the warehouse, so I’ll let you go.”

“Okay, but— Officer Lance?”

“Yeah?” He asked, bringing the phone back up to his ear.

Smoak hesitated. “We’re looking at a possible connection to the masked woman who showed up last night. If you see her, let us know right away.”

That was something. He hadn’t even put much thought into the woman who had killed Mathis. What was her deal? “Right, yeah. I’ll let you know.”

He hung up and got into his squad car, driving over to the Glades. He drove around the streets surrounding the warehouse for hours, but didn’t find a thing.

—-

Laurel rubbed at her temples with a groan. It was five o’clock somewhere, and she was stone-cold sober. That was definitely a problem.

In the cold light of day, she wasn’t really sure what she was doing here. Here being the Wildcat Gym, as she’d realized upon looking at the logo on both the hoodie and sweatpants she was borrowing for the moment. The name seemed familiar to her, but she couldn’t remember why. She’d used the landline phone in Ted’s office to place a call into her work, knowing she did not have the energy nor the strength to show her face in there for a while.

Last year at CNRI, she would’ve hated taking even a day off. But the DA’s office was not what she’d hoped it might be. Kate still disliked her, Adam was...decidedly not the most professional. She rarely got to see or speak to the victims or families of the criminals they were putting away. It was all so impersonal. Lonely, like she was now.

The door to Ted’s office opened, and he entered with a sandwich in a takeout bag. “Thought you might need something to eat.”

“More like something to drink,” she grumbled, but took the food anyway. God, she was going to be in so much debt to this man when all was said and done.

When she glanced up, he was frowning at her. “You drink a lot, Dinah?”

“Please don’t start. Not you too,” she replied, starting to stand up. This had been a stupid idea and she needed to just suck it up and go back to work. It was weird being called by her first name all the time, anyway. She kept looking over her shoulder expecting her mother to be there when she knew she shouldn’t expect that ever.

“Look, I’m not judging. I know how it is. Got an injury a while back that ended my fighting career.” He gestured to the sidewall, where for the first time Laurel noticed a number of framed articles and trophies. Starling’s southpaw wins heavyweight title, one headline proclaimed. Another framed article mentioned a family being rescued from a fire by an anonymous stranger. 

She didn’t have the time to dwell on it, for Ted spoke again. “I took it hard, at first. Felt like I couldn’t do anything for anybody, much less myself.”

“So you drank?”

“So I drank. It only dulled the pain. It didn’t make it go away.”

Laurel looked down at the ground, her eyes squeezed shut. “Then what does?”

“Finding a way to keep doing what makes you feel alive. Come on, eat and then I want you to join me in the ring.”

“I don’t know how to box.”

“Yeah, that’s why I teach lessons, you know?” He smirked. “Eat first.”

She did, the headache lessening somewhat. She found a water fountain against one wall of the gym and that helped a little too. Laurel walked around various students at the bags or doing stretches, most of them male, and found Ted waiting in the ring. He watched her struggle to climb into it herself.

“Mitts,” he said once she was standing, passing her a set. She watched him put on his own and then mimicked him. “You do much fighting?”

“I took self-defense classes growing up,” she revealed. “And I’ve needed them a few times recently.”

“Alright, that’s not a bad start. But what we’re doing here isn’t some quick takedown maneuver. This is a fight. Let’s see what you got.” And then he took the first swing.

Laurel ducked, stumbling back a bit, then ducked again. He held back after that, watching her. She wasn’t about to let him keep just swinging at her, so she lunged forward. He dodged easily, bumping at her side with his left mitt. It wasn’t hard, but it still winded her a bit.

“Don’t overreach. Keep your fists up and your sides guarded,” he coached. Laurel tried to swallow around the mouth guard and did as instructed. By the time he was talking her through the combinations he’d been using, she abruptly realized her headache had dissipated on its own.

She felt way better, actually. Invigorated. She hadn’t actually known she could still feel alive after everything.

Ted was going easy on her, she could tell. It made her want to try all the harder. Even if she barely knew what she was doing. All she knew was it felt right. She felt wholly in control of her body and mind for the first time in months. Maybe years.

He called a stop after a few minutes when she was panting for breath, grinning broadly. He did that a lot. “Not bad, not bad. We can work on your form. Why don’t I show you the bags, and you can take however much time on each of them to get a feel for it?”

Laurel nodded, and this time he held the ropes up for her to help her out of the ring. They went to one of the speed bags first, as she learned it was called.

Ted was a really good teacher, she had to give him that. A day ago she would have scoffed at the idea of spending hours at a gym.

The one thing he couldn’t fix was that she was so not wearing the right bra for this. But that was a problem she could handle herself.

—-

Sara knew it was risking a lot for her to be seen out in the day, but that was something that couldn’t be helped. After Laurel had run from the warehouse, she’d assumed her father or Oliver would catch up to her and calm her down. But it had been three days, and her sister had yet to return to her apartment or her daily routine. So now she was searching.

After she’d arrived in Starling and ensured her family had made it through the Undertaking, she had found it hard to leave. Now she was glad she hadn’t. Apart from the serial killer who had abducted them, something was wrong with Laurel.

She’d heard the first scream up in the rafters and nearly panicked, thinking one of the League had finally arrived and was trying to draw her out with more of the sonic bombs she had borrowed from their arsenal. But then she’d seen the second scream for herself coming from her own sister’s mouth.

She’d seen things that were hard to believe in her time away and never thought they might come to her home. But someone had done something to her sister, and for that they were going to pay. If it had been the man she’d killed the other night, he already had.

No woman, especially one of her own family, was going to suffer as the result of some man’s experiment. Never again.

She had Sin looking on the streets while she scoured from the rooftops. So far there was no sign of Laurel. No news was good news, maybe, but she wouldn’t trust that her sister was safe until the evidence was before her eyes.

But a flash of red below her caught her eye for the moment. The boy from the other day that Oliver had sent running after her. He was hiding in the shadow of one of the buildings below her. Sara shook her head. Then she leapt to the next rooftop.

The chase continued for several minutes. Whatever she did, she couldn’t seem to shake him. He knew these streets better than her, she was forced to acknowledge. He’d probably grown up on them.

“Fine,” she muttered under her breath, taking a fire escape down into the alley he was watching her from now. Enabling her voice modulator, she thrust her staff out in front of her. “What does the Arrow want now?”

The boy watched her, keeping a good bit of distance between them. “He wants to know what you’ve done to a woman.”

Sara reared back. “What I’ve done?” The nerve Oliver had asking her that! Even if he didn’t know who she was.

“Your sonic stuff,” the boy in the red hoodie added. “He thinks there’s some kind of connection?” She could see some frustration warring on his features; obviously, Oliver hadn’t told him all the details and he wanted to know more.

But Sara had to pause as the question hit her. That scream had been like her devices, only more powerful. Was this the League? Were they punishing her for leaving by turning her sister into some kind of human weapon?

“If there’s a connection, it’s not my doing.” But it could be her fault. “I’m trying to find her the same as he is. And he can look at my record to know I don’t hurt other women.”

Sara jumped onto the lid of a closed dumpster, grabbed the ladder of the fire escape and ascended back to the rooftops.

If the League was here, why hadn’t they reached out to her first? She was sure they would soon, in order to show off what they’d done. She needed to find Laurel before any more harm came to her.

Her sister was never going to forgive her for this.

—-

Oliver paced behind her chair, which Felicity found nearly as distracting as his workouts. It had none of the side benefits, though.

“Do you think we can trust her at her word?” John asked.

“I don’t trust anyone at their word,” was Oliver’s reply, and Felicity nearly rolled her eyes. That explained a lot about his behavior, actually. “We can’t know anything for sure until Laurel is found.”

“Where could she be hiding out for this long, though, Oliver? We ran surveillance on Joanna de la Vega the last two nights and it turned up nothing. Lance has had no luck.”

“There’s something we’re missing,” Oliver said, not for the first time. Felicity largely tuned them both out, as she was in the middle of some very tricky hacking. Seriously, who knew a laboratory would have more advanced cybersecurity than the FBI!

“I have an idea!” She announced loudly, turning back around in her chair just in time to find Oliver and John glowering at each other. “If anyone would like to hear it.”

They both cooled off and looked to her. “Go ahead, Felicity,” said John.

“Well, the only thing we know is that somehow Laurel is able to scream really loud. Like, inhumanly loud. So, I have borrowed some satellites from STAR Laboratories to monitor the city for any high frequencies. If we can catch her using the scream-thing, we’ll know her location.”

“Or that other woman if she uses one of those bombs,” John pointed out.

“Either helps us,” said Oliver. “Good work.” Felicity did her best not to preen at the praise. He turned and left to change right after, then departed the base to start searching manually as he had been the last several nights. Felicity hoped Laurel showed herself soon, so that Oliver might start to focus on something other than finding his ex-girlfriend.

A beep on the computer was the answer to her hopes, and Felicity hurriedly reached for the comms. “Oliver! We have something on the corner of Farina and 7th, in the Glades.” Her fingers flew across the keys for a few seconds. “The only thing of note there is a gym, and it should be closed at this time of night.”

“Got it.”

Felicity turned to look back at John. “So, think it’s her?”

“I hope so. Whatever happened the other night with Dollmaker, we need answers.”

—-

It had taken some convincing, but Ted had gotten Dinah to join him on the roof of the gym. “Do you have a secret boxing ring up here?” She asked as they walked through the access door.

“No. But I figured this is as good a place as any for you to practice your other new skill.”

She tensed. “Ted, I don’t know.”

“Come on, Dinah. You’ve made a lot of progress already, and I don’t want to see you toss that aside because of something you’re scared of.” He really was impressed with her progress. She had a strength those skinny arms belied, even if they were working on that. Part of him wondered if there was more to his new student than her souped-up vocal chords.

“I don’t even know if I could do it again. It hasn’t happened since that night.”

“Because you’re holding back. Look, do you need to get back into some kind of zone? We can throw a few punches, see if that works.” He put up his guard and was proud to see she immediately did likewise. She wasn’t trusting him not to throw the first punch then. Stances ready, they circled each other, in tight to avoid any kind of accidents — it was a big roof, but still, best not to be stupid about it. She threw a jab that he blocked, then met with his own which she ducked under. There was a fire in her eyes that hadn’t been there the night they met, and this was the kind of thing that kept Ted going. Seeing others realize their gifts, their potential—

Someone landed on the roof in a roll, coming up onto her feet and charging straight at him. Ted only just brought up his arm to block a vicious swing of a metal staff, but it connected painfully all the same. Her next swipe took him off his feet.

“Ted!”

“Get downstairs!” He shouted to Dinah. If some crazy mask wanted to come after him, he wasn’t getting her mixed up in it. Ted grabbed onto the staff as it came down again and yanked it to the side, sending his attacker off balance. He followed it with a kick to her chest before scrambling back to his feet. She hadn’t even fallen.

“You’re going to regret holding a woman hostage,” she said.

“Hostage? Hold on, here.”

But she didn’t hold on. She came at him again and again, and Ted was nearing the edge of the roof. She had a killer’s intent, he realized, and that intent was laser-focused on him.

“Leave him alone!” Dinah shouted, and that high-pitched scream followed. The woman in the mask went flying and skidding across the roof’s surface, but Ted was knocked back.

“Whoa!” He flailed and caught the roof’s edge with his left hand, the strain of gravity on his own weight making him grit his teeth.

“Ted!” Dinah ran to him, reaching for his right to help pull him up which he gladly accepted. “God, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean—”

The whoosh of something and the chink of metal and stone was the only warning they both got before a figure in dark green and a hood — the Hood — swooped in on a freaking zip line. He caught Dinah around the waist and pulled her away. Ted only barely leveraged both arms onto the roof and kicked with his legs to pull himself back up the rest of the way.

“Hey!” Even if this new vigilante had changed his mind about killing, he sure as hell didn’t trust the guy with his student!

“Let me go, you’ve got it all wrong!” Dinah was yelling at the same time, pushing against the archer’s chest. Then her eyes widened. “Ted, look out!”

Blondie in the mask was stirring, only he realized her wig had been knocked off her head. She rose to her feet gingerly, shaking her head as if to clear the ringing that had to be in her ears.

Two voices cried out in shock in the same moment, one modulated and one not. But they both said the same thing: “Sara?”

Blondie winced. Ted looked between her and the other pair, who had both turned sharply to stare at each other in an almost comical way.

“Wait, how do you know — Ollie?” Dinah exclaimed.

The Hood or Arrow or whatever the hell he wanted to be called released her, taking a large step back and ducking his head like a boy who’d been caught stealing cookies and hoping nobody had noticed.

“Oh my God.” Dinah pressed the heels of her hands to her temples. “What is going on?”

The windows rattled slightly. She shut her mouth and glared around at both vigilantes instead.

Ted blew out a breath. This was going to be a much longer night than he’d anticipated.

—-

Laurel was going crazy. Had to be. That, or she had actually died that night by Dollmaker’s hand and the afterlife was weirder than any of the holy books claimed. But regardless, nothing seemed to be changing anytime soon and she had no idea where to start.

“You—” she looked at Oliver. Then she whirled to face her sister. “And you- you’re alive.”

Sara was staring at her toes. “I am, yeah.”

“How long have you been back?”

“A few,” Sara started, then cleared her throat as her voice had gone very quiet. “A few months. I heard about the earthquake and I- I had to see you all were okay.”

Laurel absorbed that for a moment. “And before that? Why haven’t you come home? Why haven’t you told mom or dad or me you’re alive?”

“Sisters? Geez,” Ted muttered from a few feet behind her.

“Because I couldn’t,” Sara answered. She took a step forward. “Laurel, I — the people I’ve been with, what I’ve done for them...I’m not the sister you remember. And I can’t come home. It would put you all in danger.”

There was so much she was feeling right now. Anger, joy, confusion, grief, hurt that the grief had been unnecessary. But no matter what Sara said, she had come back for them. She was her sister, and she was alive, and she’d come here to try and save her from Ted. Hilarious as that idea was. Laurel took the remaining steps, closing the gap that was between them.

“Sara, if you were in trouble, you should have come to us.”

“You don’t understand,” Sara said, shaking her head.

“I don’t have to. You’re my sister.” And she pulled her sister into a hug.

“Laurel…” Sara’s arms hung at her sides before suddenly they wrapped around her, as if she’d just remembered the action.

Laurel wasn’t sure deep down if she was totally over everything that had happened those six years ago. For one thing, she’d yet to hear an apology. But she’d forgiven Oliver. She couldn’t keep holding that grudge against her own sister. And sometimes, the only thing to do was to help, like Ted had said. Barely a week, and she was so much the better for it. If Sara could have the same—

A thought came to her, and she let her sister go before turning back to face Oliver. “Did you know?”

“No,” Oliver and Sara said at the same time.

“Actually, he thought I’d done this to you,” Sara added, sounding insulted.

Oliver grit his teeth. “I didn’t know you were her sister. I was working with the information I had at the time.”

“And that information led you both to decide Ted had kidnapped me?” Her teacher was smirking now, clearly taking his amusement from the drama playing out. Well, she did owe him.

“No one had heard from you,” Oliver said, an accusatory note to his tone that she might have yelled at except that she could see the hurt in his eyes.

“Did it occur to you maybe I needed some space? Some time to figure this out?” She asked in a measured voice instead, gesturing at her throat. “How was I supposed to reach out to either of you when I didn’t know you?”

Sara and Oliver both looked down, ashamed.

“I know I should have called dad at least,” she admitted. “I just knew if I talked to him, he’d insist on coming to get me and I- I wasn’t ready to face that. I still don’t know what to do about this.”

“You don’t know how it happened?” Sara asked.

Laurel shook her head. “I was terrified. He was going to kill me and I just- I didn’t want to die. I don’t know if that was it. I was just so tired of feeling helpless and waiting to die.” Her shoulders sagged as a weight seemed to lift off her, admitting that. “After Tommy — I didn’t think anyone cared enough to save me, and I didn’t want them to. It was my fault.”

“No, it wasn’t.”

“Well it wasn’t yours,” Laurel snapped before Oliver could continue that train of thought. “You were the only one trying to put a stop to the quake, and I blamed you for it when I never should’ve.”

“Maybe the blame is with the man who started the earthquake,” Ted interjected. “Malcolm Merlyn. That’s not an easy answer when he’s too dead to care, but it’s the facts.”

Laurel looked down, then met Oliver’s eyes. He nodded, something in his gaze telling her that the mistakes she’d made with the anti-vigilante task force were forgiven.

“You two gonna kiss and make up already?” Sara asked.

“Sara!”

“What? He swings into save you like Robin Hood and you’re gonna act like nothing’s going on?” She shook her head. “It’s you two, always and forever.”

Laurel’s mouth hung open, looking between her sister and Oliver. “I...am not ready for that conversation.”

“That’s fine,” Oliver said, and she thought there was some red under the greasepaint she could make out smeared over his face. He then turned more serious as he looked to Ted. “We do need to talk about what you know.”

“Hey, you came onto my roof. I didn’t ask for this,” said Ted. “But if you’re worried, no, I’m not running to the cops once you leave. It’d make me a hell of a hypocrite for one thing.”

“Wildcat,” Laurel breathed in realization. “I remember — one of my clients mentioned you the first year I started at CNRI!”

Ted shrugged, the closest to bashful that she’d seen him.

“He was a local vigilante in the Glades a few years ago,” Laurel explained to both Oliver and Sara, who seemed to relax upon hearing that statement.

“Yeah, so your secret’s safe with me. Anyway, a friend of Dinah’s is a friend of mine. Or Laurel’s, I suppose, since that’s your real name,” he added to her.

She smiled sheepishly. “They both are, actually. Dinah Laurel Lance.”

Ted smiled back. “Good to meet you properly, then.”

“Yeah, and I guess this is goodbye. I should really get back home. I need to stop running from myself.”

“You’re not the only one,” Sara said. She looked back to her sister in confusion. “I’ve been staying in one place for too long. The people I left...they’ll come here to try and get me back. And they’ll use you and dad if they can.”

“Sara, we can help you.”

Sara shook her head. “I couldn’t keep living if one of you were hurt or, or killed because of me. I have to do this, Laurel. I couldn’t handle it when I thought they’d already done something to you, your voice or...whatever caused that scream, I’m hoping you can use it to keep yourself and dad safe. At least until I can make my way back here.”

Laurel couldn’t believe she was expected to give up her sister the minute she’d learned she was still alive. It wasn’t fair. Impulsively, she hugged her again. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Sara said, her voice wavering. “Always and forever.” When they stepped back, she looked to Oliver. “I’m trusting you to keep them safe, too.”

Oliver nodded. “Always. I...if there’s anything I can do.”

Her sister shook her head. “Not this time, Ollie.” She took Laurel’s hand and squeezed it tight, then let go. Taking it at a run, she leapt from one roof to the next, eventually disappearing from sight.

Laurel sniffed, trying to hold back tears at her sister’s departure. A hand rested on her shoulder, and she looked back up at Oliver, who had crossed the roof to stand with her. “I can get you home,” he said quietly.

“Thank you. Really, thank you.” She turned and slipped her arms around him, seeming to surprise him nearly as much as Sara had been with the hug. Laurel had to admit, it was strange knowing she was even hugging their city’s vigilante. But he wasn’t just that. He was so much more. “I understand better now, why you had to go.”

He drew in a breath, then put his own arms around her. “I wish I hadn’t.”

Laurel stepped back and offered him a shaky smile. Maybe they couldn’t go back. But in time, they might just be able to go forward. “Give me a minute, then I’ll be ready.”

She walked over to Ted. “So, thanks again.”

“Don’t mention it. Those clothes you showed up in are still downstairs, you know.”

She made a face. “Burn them.” There was no way she could see herself wearing them again without thinking of the Dollmaker at his hot breath on her neck...it was better to just leave that all behind.

“This doesn’t have to be goodbye, you know. You’ve only just started your lessons.”

She found herself smiling. “I’ll pay you for the rest.”

“It’s a deal.” He turned and headed for the access door. “See you around, Dinah.”

She looked at him, an eyebrow raised.

“Hey, I think it fits.”

Laurel shook her head. “If you say so.”

He headed downstairs and she walked back to Oliver’s side. “Lessons?” He asked.

“Yes. Like Sara said, I have to protect my family. And my loved ones.”

“Right,” he agreed, looking confused.

Laurel sighed and nudged him. “That includes you, Ollie.”

“Oh.” His eyes were wide, and she bit her lip to stop a giggle. “I’ll get you home then.”

She stepped into his hold as he fired off another grapple arrow, jumping with him to let it carry them across the city.

Her life was destined never to go the way she ever planned. But as long as she kept getting up to fight another day, Laurel was determined to let nothing keep her down again.

—-

As he recruited more and more of the brightest minds this century had to offer to the labs, it became harder for Eobard to slip away and conduct his daily ritual. But he always managed to do so. He was meticulous about it; the scientific method only worked if it was adhered to, after all. And his plan was grounded in science, not impulses of anger like his last plan had been. That was what had doomed him to be stuck here, after all.

This particular day, he was anxious to reach the Time Vault in order to better organize his thoughts, cast into turmoil by a piece of news out of Starling City. Professor Eobard Thawne cared little for Starling City news, but Dr. Harrison Wells hailed from Starling and as such received a copy of the Starling Gazette every morning. Eobard usually only bothered to skim the contents once a week or so to keep appearances that he was informed about the meaningless day-to-day of the 2010s, but an article from earlier in the week had caught his eye.

A serial killer had been murdered by a vigilante after abducting Dinah Laurel Lance and her father. The autopsy noted a broken neck as the ultimate cause of death, but reporters also noted Barton Mathis’ eardrums had been ruptured. There was no stated cause and, most crucially, no statement on the record from Dinah Laurel Lance.

“Good morning, Dr. Wells,” Gideon greeted him once he entered the Time Vault.

“It’s an interesting one, Gideon. Daily Log, just under fifty days before the particle accelerator is set to erupt and my experiment truly begins at last,” Eobard said, confident Gideon was getting it all down. “There has been a complication. An early sighting of one of the Justice League: Black Canary.”

Not the prototype of her sister, either. That had no consequence; Rip Hunter would remove her from the timeline soon enough. But bleeding ears meant the Black Canary herself, and the presence of her civilian identity only confirmed it.

He had further evidence. Gideon had flagged a security breach the previous night at their location in Starling. Someone had remotely accessed their satellite information to do a localized search encompassing the city limits.

And that someone hadn’t been hacking his labs’ data for just any frequency information. Someone had hacked it specifically to find the Canary’s frequency. A frequency she shouldn’t be able to achieve yet.

Or should she? The little he had read about other heroes besides the Flash from his time had never definitively stated what caused Black Canary’s sonic capabilities. He had assumed like most academics that she was a metahuman like all the rest, created in the particle accelerator explosion. But assumptions truly had no place in academics.

Was she something else? A genetic mutation, perhaps, triggered in the event of extreme stress? Or was this perhaps an anomaly, a time aberration the likes of which he had been dreading?

Eobard had kept a close watch on the timeline since the murders he had committed at the turn of this century. He’d done everything he possibly could to make sure events aligned — but then, they couldn’t align completely, could they? These changes he had made could not be stopped from rippling outward, and he was aware already of some of the effects both large and small. So far, the future had not changed too much; Crisis was still waiting for the heroes and the future waited for him. He was unstoppable, his own aberration.

Perhaps the universe had decided an equal and opposite reaction was required. Black Canary’s early presence meant an established hero for Barry Allen to look to, and Canary was notorious for having a strict moral code. If Barry became too close to her and Green Arrow, he might not be as malleable as Eobard hoped. He might even become the Flash he hated once again.

But then, that could be a gift in and of itself. It would be so much sweeter watching his hated enemy realize Eobard’s betrayal.

He’d have to keep a closer eye on the developments out of Starling City from now on, of course. “Gideon, show me results for the Black Canary.”

“Of course, Dr. Wells.”

His eyes scanned the photos, the articles. Black Canary joining the fight alongside Green Arrow, Hawkgirl and the Flash along with countless heroes. The Birds of Prey teaming up with Wildcat to stop an illegal fight club. Dinah Laurel Lance-Queen running down the courthouse steps with her new husband.

“Until we meet again for the first time, Black Canary,” Eobard murmured under his breath. “End Daily Log.”

[goodticklebrain]

Q&A August: Austin Tichenor of the Reduced Shakespeare Company

They say you should never meet your heroes, but obviously “they” were never enlightened enough to consider Austin Tichenor of the Reduced Shakespeare Company a hero. Like many Shakespeare geeks, I was exposed to Reduced Shakespeare Company’s performance of The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (abridged) at an impressionable young age. Once the DVD came out, I watched it over and over again, soaking up the irreverence and affection for Shakespeare like a sponge. It never occurred to me that I would one day meet the curly-haired pompous idiot in the black pants whose antics had entertained me so much, let alone be lucky enough to call him a friend, but that’s exactly what has happened.

I first met Austin (after exchanging mutually admiring tweets with him) in April of 2016, during their world premiere of William Shakespeare’s Long Lost First Play (abridged) at the Folger Library. I was prepared to be utterly starstruck, but Austin was so wonderfully down-to-earth that within minutes I felt like I’d known him forever. Totally lacking the pomposity and idiocy of his stage persona, Austin was overwhelmingly encouraging and supportive of my work, immediately welcoming me to play with him in the Shakespeare comedy sandbox. I had literally just started working full-time on Good Tickle Brain, so his enthusiasm meant the world to me.

I could gush about Austin for many more paragraphs, but I’m sure you’d rather hear from him, so here he is, my Comedy Fairy Godfather, in his own words!

1. Who are you? Why Shakespeare?

I’m Austin Tichenor, a playwright, director, and actor. I'm the co-artistic director of the Reduced Shakespeare Company, a three-person comic theatre troupe that reduces long serious topics into short silly comedies.

My first exposure to Shakespeare was undoubtedly in the original series of Star Trek! I read Shakespeare in high school English classes and got to see fantastic productions of Shakespeare at American Conservatory Theatre in San Francisco and the Berkeley Reprtory Theatre, but I didn’t get to actually WORK on Shakespeare until grad school where I both played Claudius in a production of Hamlet and reduced my first Shakespeare (it was a directorial exercise: a five minute reduction of Much Ado About Nothing). My first professional theatre job was creating plays for young people so I went to Shakespeare immediately, creating 45 minute cuttings of Much Ado, Midsummer, and The Tempest.

So the opportunity to join the RSC in 1992 and perform its signature work The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (abridged) (written by the RSC’s founders) in London’s West End for eight months combined all my theatrical loves: smart silly comedy, non-realistic theatricality, and Shakespeare — which is kinda redundant, now that I think about it

2. What moment(s) in Shakespeare always make you laugh?

My favorite moments are typically when characters make incredible discoveries about themselves, and these are usually comic. Malvolio’s “I am…happy!” Terrible actor Francis Flute fully committing to the moment on “Dead, my dove?” Benedick’s “There’s a double meaning in that.” Hamlet toying with Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, or telling Claudius he “shall nose” the dead Polonius as he goes upstairs. Olivia’s “Most wonderful!” when the penny drops and she realizes “Cesario” is actually Viola (and Sebastian’s twin).

3. What's a favorite Shakespearean performance anecdote?

I have two!

1) We were performing William Shakespeare’s Long Lost First Play (abridged) for the Shakespeare Theatre Association conference — the savviest and most knowledgeable group of people I’ll probably ever perform for, ever. I was playing Richard III and limping downstage to say my first line, one of the most famous first lines in all of Shakespeare. But I was distracted because I saw there were people sitting on the sides and I didn’t want to limp too far downstage for them to see — and in my distraction I said, “Now is the moment of our...” As soon as the word was out of my mouth, I knew I’d blown the line (it’s supposed to be “Now is the winter of our discontent”) and I knew I couldn’t pretend that it hadn’t happened; not in front of that crowd, not in our style of show. So I quite audibly said, “Oh f&$# me,” and limped back offstage to come in again. This time I said the line right and emphasized the first word: “Now is the winter of our discontent!” It brought down the house and everyone asked whether I’d planned it. Sigh…no, I hadn’t.

Mya interjects: I was in the house for this performance and this moment remains one of the highlights of my theatre-going career. What Austin neglects to mention here is that Reed, who had been left alone onstage after Austin had retreated, went over to the wings as if to confer with Austin, and said, sotto voce, “No, I don’t think anybody noticed.”

2) We were performing The Complete Works on a stage that had a little runway that circled the orchestra pit. In one of the scenes, Adam Long (one of the RSC’s founding members) decided to hop over the pit, from the stage to the runway, and he ended breaking the runway floor and falling through the boards. Thankfully uninjured, and delighted that he had this opportunity, he immediately uttered the immortal words, “Don’t worry, it’s just a stage I’m going through."

4. What's one of the more unusual Shakespearean interpretations you've either seen or would like to see?

I’m glad that nowhere in here have you asked what my favorite play is. I don’t have favorite Shakespeare plays, but I do have favorite productions. Here are two:

1) The Folger Theatre at the Folger Shakespeare Library in Washington DC’s production of Love’s Labor’s Lost was delightful from start to finish: Incredibly smart, wildly funny, and wonderfully charming. The director and her team made the King’s desire for “a little academe” quite literal by re-creating the Folger Library’s handsome reading room onstage. (I wrote about this terrific production here.)

2) The Chicago Shakespeare Company production of The Tempest, co-directed by Aaron Posner and the magician Teller, turned Prospero into an actual wizard and filled the production with literal magic. (There must have been magic in Shakespeare’s original production as the First Folio has a stage direction that mentions that characters disappear by means of “a quaint device”. Teller filled his production with many quaint magic tricks and devices!) With music by Tom Waits and great comedy from its clowns, it was the most entertaining and completely realized production of The Tempest I've ever seen.

Favorite moments?

When Henry IV (Jeremy Irons) slaps his snotty son Prince Hal (Tom Hiddleston) in The Hollow Crown adaptation of Henry IV, Part 1 taking him (and the audience) by total surprise.

When Francis Flute’s (Sam Rockwell) emotions bubble to the surface unexpectedly in the ridiculous “Pyramus and Thisbe” in the film version of Midsummer.

When Juliet (Claire Danes) stirs and almost wakes up in time to prevent Romeo (Leonardo DiCaprio) from killing himself in Baz Lurhmann’s Romeo + Juliet.

When Antigonus (Gregory Linington) distracted the Bear, dooming himself but preventing the death of Perdita, in the Goodman Theatre production of one of my least favorite plays The Winter’s Tale.

5. What's one of your favorite Shakespearean "hidden gems”?

The hidden gem of Shakespeare is actually right out in the open: He’s written incredibly theatrical plays, filled with rich and elusive characters that still fascinate us 400 years later, and even the most serious of his plays (including his Histories and especially his Tragedies) contain more comedy than is generally realized (or pulled off). Shakespeare was a showman whose livelihood depended on entertaining his audiences, so he created plays filled with music, devices, comic bits, fascinating characters, time jumps, changing perspectives, and shifting tones that are always serious (especially his Comedies) but never solemn.

(You don’t ask what my Shakespearean pet peeve but here it is: Productions that lack urgency and ignore the above, as in: Comedies that are beautiful-looking and melancholy but not funny. Histories that ignore the comic chaos that Shakespeare layers in. Tragedies that are one-note, over-the-top, and not in any way believable. Romances that equate pastoral with languid and not compelling. Argh.)

6. What passages from Shakespeare have stayed with you?

Oh so many...

Beatrice’s “Kill Claudio,” which comes seemingly out of the blue and yet is so right.

Falstaff’s honor speech, when done right, in front of a live audience.

And I find Miranda’s “O brave new world that hath such people in’t” just incredibly moving. (I’m always moved by Joy. Tragedy can suck it.)

Mya interjects: “Tragedy can suck it” might be my new personal motto now. Thanks, Austin.

7. What Shakespeare plays have changed for you?

Henry VI, Part 1. Reading it again recently, I was struck by the level of chaos Shakespeare depicts in a kingdom struggling without a ruler. It’s almost like Monty Python meets Veep: Sentences can’t get finished because people are running in and out, declaring “I’m in charge! I’m in charge!” with grand impotence. Of course Shakespeare would write it like that: He needed to entertain his audience, who were probably also nervous about their aging queen who had yet to declare a successor. Shakespeare created a chaotic warning that England shouldn’t descend into that kind of comically dangerous madness again — a warning that wasn’t really heeded, unfortunately.

8. What Shakespearean character or characters do you identify the most with?

Having played so many of them (albeit in reduced forms), that’s a tough call. But because I’m also an actor and a playwright, the ones I probably identify with the most are Shakespeare's seemingly autobiographical ones: Peter Quince, the only (I think) actor-playwright in the canon. Hamlet, the Danish prince with surprisingly strong opinions about theatre’s power and how certain speeches should be played (and how annoying comedians can be). Benedick, who struggles with his writing so comically. Suffolk, who in Henry VI, Part 1 declares, “I’ll call for pen and ink and write my mind.” And Bottom, of course, who thinks he can play anything.

Mya interjects: PETER QUINCES OF THE WORLD, UNITE!

9. Where can we find out more about you? Are there any projects/events you would like us to check out?

I’ve spent the last several years doing incredibly deep dives into Shakespeare, across many media:

My RSC partner Reed Martin and I wrote Pop-Up Shakespeare, an incredibly fun (and useful) introduction to the Bard’s life and works with beautiful, amazing, and funny illustrations by Jennie Maizels.

I contribute monthly essays about the intersection between Shakespeare and popular culture for the Folger Shakespeare Library’s Shakespeare & Beyond blog.

My weekly podcast (now in its 13th year) is a backstage glimpse into the life and works of the Reduced Shakespeare Company, featuring interviews with our many comedian, actor, playwright, author, director, composer, dramaturg, and artist friends and many many deep dives into matters Shakespearean.

Reed and I also wrote the definitive irreverent reference book, Reduced Shakespeare: The Complete Guide for the Attention-Impaired (abridged), which is still inexplicably in print (perhaps cuz it’s definitive).

We also wrote the stage play William Shakespeare’s Long Lost First Play (abridged) (“An absolute resolute hoot of a bawdy comedy of errors!” Broadway World), which premiered at the Folger Theatre in 2016, has toured the US and the UK, and is available for licensing via Broadway Play Publishing.

And in November 2019, the RSC will perform the international premiere in Israel of our brand new script Hamlet’s Big Adventure (a prequel) — what would happen if Tom Stoppard wrote Muppet Babies. It’s the comedy of the Prince of Denmark!

If after reading all this, for some insane reason you still want to get in touch, come find me here on Twitter. I think Mya will agree that it’s a much more civilized and fun place than its reputation suggests.

(Back to Mya) Thanks so much to Austin for taking the time to answer my questions! If you want to HEAR us actually talking to each other check out:

Reduced Shakespeare Co. Podcast #493

Reduced Shakespeare Co. Podcast #532

Reduced Shakespeare Co. Podcast #653

Q&A August continues next week with two phenomenal women who are using Shakespeare to build the most amazing things.