#thank you i'll be here all week

[absolutebl]

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans

actual title

Chef's Kiss

[the-halfling-prince]

Half of the s5-7 BMW episodes

Cory: shawn, why doesn't my gf wanna fuck me?

Shawn: idk man, you're totally fuckable, i'd fuck you

Cory: thanks shawnie. anyway-

[wreckerspocketcheeto]

Why does Tech lift his finger when he infodumps?

Because he likes to give pointers.

[wildbasil]

[nugulover69]

So you're saying Alata should just

wing it

[xanthlikesfallout]

incomprehensible growling

Thinking too much about my damn dnd character and his family,

Despite what the title might suggest, none of the above characters depicted are of the bastard I hold so dear to my heart, they're his immediate family because of course, I have to take the time of day to draw them (what else could I have done with my time!?). In descending order, from left to right depicted is his older brother, the middle child, his mother, and his older sister (the eldest child, and consequently her father's heir), last but not least being his father. Believe it or not, I've yet to do a fully digital fleshed-out drawing of my actual pc, (his name is Amir)

Anyway, the siblings fill a common trope, with the eldest being the most responsible as she bears the most on her shoulders in regard to the known (or predicted) future. The middle child: rambunctious, which probably defies the stereotype surrounding middle children, but c'est la vie in the realm of my writing. He (to be named) functions as some sort of captain in whatever army I've yet to think up. Finally, Amir: a scholar, and a pretentious bastard. Being the youngest he's always been subject to some degree of pampering despite being raised a distance away from his siblings for the majority of his life following the age of nine. He's very spoiled and selfish, (I ought to just copy and paste what I've already drabbled about in the discord server where he's been brought to life (love you gyuys)), but aside from that he's somewhat good-natured.

Uhuh I can't say that I can think of anything else to say that wouldn't be a massive spoiler for anyone who so happens to be a part of the campaign and stumbles upon this post, until then I've had my fill.

[ficklesprite]

What did the salad say to the macaroni salad...

...Lettuce go, I cannot romaine here any longer

[an-sceal]

What you get when your girlfriend would rather be watching Mrs. Maisel.

What you get when the author has set everything up for a sex scene but they don't really want to write it anymore.

When you've already hooked up with each other before, but she's the only person at the party who isn't officially an ex.

When...

[superb-fairywren]

Nona loves dogs the most because they're the reverse of God

[trans-beast]

And later the sailor admits that the fish in question was actually just a really big mackerel, and he lied about what it was called because he wanted to see if the holy man would fall for it.

A priest hooks a huge fish

Helping him reel it in, a sailor says “Whoa, look at the size of that fucker!”.

“Hey, mind your language!” says the priest.

Embarrassed, the sailor thinks quickly and blurts out, “Sorry father, but that’s what this fish is called, it’s a Fucker fish”.

Accepting the explanation, the priest forgives the sailor and takes the fish back to church.

“Look at this huge fucker” says the priest, spotting the bishop.

“Language, please! this is God’s house,” replies the bishop.

“No, no that’s what this fish is called, “says the priest.

“Oh,” says the bishop, scratching his chin “I could clean that fucker and we could have it for dinner”.

So the bishop takes the fish, cleans it, and brings it to the mother superior.

“Could you cook this fucker for dinner tonight?” he asks her.

“My, what language!” she exclaims, clearly shocked.

“No, sister that’s what the fish is called - a fucker”, says the bishop.

Satisfied with the explanation, the mother superior says, “Wonderful, I’ll cook that fucker tonight, The Pope is coming for dinner!”

The fish tastes just great and The Pope asks where they got it.

“Well, I caught the fucker!” says the priest.

“And I cleaned the fucker!” says the bishop.

“And I cooked the fucker!” says the mother superior.

The Pope stares at them for a minute with a steely glaze, leans back on his chair, takes off his cap, puts his feet up on the table, pours himself a whiskey and says:“ You know what?, You cunts are alright.”

[the-halfling-prince]

GMW Cory Matthews is that male history teacher with a wife and two children who is so so so undeniably gay that people always make memes about. That's him.

[jajatoc]

Just like a person, the Town is a process. It's movement. In this town, people can make the impossible, for it is a machine. A border-breaking machine.

[space-sharks-tank]

Stop putting so much chlorine in their pool!

Albino harbor seal (Phoca vitulina)

@ René Pop

[magiclilybean]

Talk about a glow-up!

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Thank you all for an incredible 500 days of love and support. I offer you: answers to questions that no one has asked.

(As always, more can be found in the tags <3)

[heartorbit]

the star you've longed for