#thank you again for the tag sj!

[edgysaintjust]

I Don't know if you answered this before but uhh- .. I don't understand the jokes about saint-just and desmoulins's relationship (it's funny as hell I swear).. like when did they met at the first place? What's the whole story about them? ..

Thx and have a nice day♡

Hello!

The jokes about their relationship! Yes, there have been a few about them having a supposed not unequivocally platonic thing between them. We do have reasons to make such speculations, but we have very little, and it’s highly exaggerated; most of it is just a fun theory to fill the gaps/spice things up but shouldn’t be taken too seriously. What we have is plenty of space left for speculations with the traces they left us. To summarise: we can’t say anything occurred; it’s just a light theory, slightly humourized recently, but it also didn’t materialise out of completely nothing ;)

Desmoulins and Saint-Just more or less kept in touch since 1789, and it continued until mid 1793. Those four years, and especially everything that happened at the very beginning, the correspondence, are very intense from SJ’s side. In May 1790, SJ wrote to his colleague: If you need me, write to me, and in general expresses a lot of enthusiasm about the relationship, while the same is not seen from Desmoulins’ side; he is successful as a journalist and just married, and perhaps didn’t consider responding to SJ’s letters due to lack of time / simply didn’t wish to. It’s also important to note that the two men shared a similar passion for both poetry/literature and politics; earlier, on 2nd January 1790 Camille will publish a short note recommending SJ’s Organt in his Révolutions de France et de Brabant.

Before the age of 25, SJ planned to participate in journalism. We can obviously suspect that there’s some influence of Camille, since young SJ looked up to him; admired him dearly as an older, respected colleague and perhaps seen him as kind of a guide; he read his newspaper, and likely tried to follow and watch how his career develops. Desmoulins, on the other hand, mocked him (half-jokingly?) numerous times, by calling out SJ’s previous support for the constitutional monarchy and calling him chevalier de Saint-Just, etc etc. There is nothing that suggests a close friendship between them; it seems that Saint-Just didn’t even know Camille’s address for some time of their correspondence (it had to be added by the post office, but wasn’t written by SJ himself on the envelope).

We observed their relationship cooling down. In 1793, in an unsent letter, SJ expressed a lot of emotions while referring to Desmoulins; which is important to highlight, because by 1793 it was important to SJ to look as professional as possible, putting personal feelings aside to create a serious facade. The letter, including the kiss* Camille from me and tell him I won’t be seeing him anymore line is personal and raw; it’s nothing suggestive per se, but leaves plenty of space to raise questions such as: what made him suddenly write such a letter, wishing to cut Desmoulins off completely? Why wasn’t it ever sent? It’s undeniable that the letter is highly emotional, and less-political.

Go to Desmoulins, embrace him for me, and tell him that he will never see me again, that I esteem his patriotism, but that I despise him, because I have penetrated his soul and he fears that I will betray him. Tell him that he does not abandon the good cause, and recommend him, for he has not yet the audacity of magnanimous virtue.

That’s the cherry on top when we speak of the supposed “crush” Saint-Just would have had on his colleague, the dramatic end of the quite one-sided relationship between them. Obviously, most of it is a light joke based around the incomplete story and shouldn’t be taken too seriously.

The facts are: young Saint-Just was seeking connections, political allies/guidance and possibly good friends; he was enthusiastic about his correspondence with Desmoulins, he was fascinated by him as an older colleague and a revolutionary voice, but it wasn’t met with an equal feedback, the letters suggest an emotional bond between them, mostly one-sided, but not a close friendship. Eventually they cooled down in terms, which was then sealed by political differences.

Hope this cleared the case a little!

*In the original Saint-Just writes embrassez-le pour moi, which as far as I know is translatable as both kiss and embrace.

[coolshadowtwins]

Shen Brothers where the system puts SY into the role of SJ’s brother (younger or twin, either), and changes the world accordingly. This happens around the time that SY would have come to the world normally (Binghe is 14~)

Ask YQY, and of course he would tell you about Xiao-Yuan, who had been there all their childhood.

Ask LQG, and he will tell you how he absolutely hates SJ, the bastard, but he guesses his brother is ok. He doesn’t like him or anything but.

Ask QHT, and she will angrily tell you about the man who ruined her life, SJ, and how he just pulled his sweet brother into it. How SY was always quiet and withdrawn in the manor and so obviously wouldn’t have helped kill her family.

As NYY or MF, and any of them would tell you about their Shizun’s brother who only comes around sometimes but is really nice to them.

Ask SJ? He will tell you that he has no brother, he has never had a brother and who the hell is this stranger with his face?

The system changed everything, except for the tagged characters- ‘protagonist’ and ‘scum villain’ did not get involved with the world change, and have no idea who SY is. LBH is pretty ok with this. SJ absolutely is not.

SJ- You stay away!

YQY- Shen-Shidi, I don’t think Xiao-Yuan has done anything….?

SJ- Xiao-Yuan? Xiao-Yuan?! Who is he?! We did not grow up with him!!

This does lead into a horrifying idea where, as SY breaks SJ’s walls down and befriends him, SJ becomes less of a ‘scum villain’. And as he loses the title, then he gets more memories of ‘his brother’ back from childhood. Idk, that level of manipulation, especially where they can’t do anything about it, sounds horrific lol

(I did think of a funnier thing as I was writing this where the title of ‘wife’ was also excluded. It wouldn’t change much, because not many wives would have come into contact with SY but that does mean a couple of things.

1) NYY has no idea who all her martial siblings are talking about. Shizun’s nice brother? Since when??? At least A-Luo has also not met him.

2) LMY has no idea when her brother had gotten this crush, but are we sure this guy is even real? Don’t get her wrong, the idea of falling in love with your hated rival’s sibling sounds romantic, but she has never in her life heard LQG talk about this guy before. And apparently they were disciples together! Does her brother just not tell her things, or is he making things up? LQG, on his part, insists he had mentioned SY just last week. Also, he didn’t have a crush on his hated rival’s sibling, thank you very much!

Man’s QHT would only know about SJ. She sees him together and goes… ‘who’s he?’ And SJ is like ‘Thank you! I never want to see you again, but someone else finds this weird!’

And then someone, probably OPM, pulls out a slave contact and goes ‘hmmm… but it says here both Shen Jiu and Shen Yuan were sold to the Qius…?’

QHT:……. That sounds fake, but I’ll go with it for the sake of my accusations.

SJ-Damn it!)

[buckyandgeraltsupremacy]

The Plot Part 2 (Anthony Bridgerton x Fem!Reader)

anthony bridgerton x fem!reader 

second part in what looks to be a several part series where his entire family plots to get you two together by the end of the season

warnings: potential creepy man; awful father who is sexist; she/her pronouns

author: sj

masterlist 

part one / part three / part four

there will be a part three coming soon:)

tags: @lafy-taffy​

It was the first ball of the season and you were positively terrified. This wasn’t even your first season out but the fact that you were to marry at the end of this one made the stakes so much higher. Currently, your arm was wrapped around Eloise’s as you watched from the wall. You had already danced with a few gentlemen and none of them were memorable. But Eloise’s eyes seemed to be rolling towards her brain more times than you could count which was enough to keep you entertained.

The trio of Bridgerton brothers currently could be found a few feet away from you and Eloise. They were deep in discussion of who knows what when Benedict noticed a gentleman approaching you and Eloise. He seemed to be interested in you and was currently filling his name in on your dance card. He gave a little bow with his hand outstretched and you hesitantly placed yours in his as you let go of Eloise and gave her a tight smile.

As you walked away, Eloise joined the boys and sighed. “Poor Y/n, she hasn’t even been acting like herself. Her smile is gone and all I can think about is what if it never comes back if she’s forced to marry someone she doesn’t like. I mean look at her.” They all glanced to you on the dance floor and watched your tight smile twist into a grimace as the man you were dancing with stepped on your foot.

“I’ll take next dance and give her a break before she's cornered by another man who decides to break her toes.” Benedict said. He walked away towards the dance floor where you were curtsying towards the man in front of you.

“May I have next dance Miss Y/l/n?” Benedict asked extending his hand. Your eyes found his and you give him the first real smile of the night. He grabbed your hand and got ready for the next dance.

“Thank you Benny.” You whispered. “But if you ever call me Miss Y/l/n again I’ll hide all your brushes.” You threatened.

Anthony observed your face brightening as his brother started to dance with you. He couldn’t help but be a little tiny bit jealous that his brother was who caused that reaction and not himself.

“Perhaps Benedict could court her. They look good together. Maybe they could marry for friendship instead of love.” Eloise stated, glancing towards Colin and Anthony who were watching the pair dancing. She noticed that Anthony tensed at her words. Had she missed something? Was her eldest brother secretly harboring feelings for her friend? This. Is. Perfect.

After the dance you and Benedict made your way back towards the small group and reconvened. Just as you joined the group a hand grabbed your elbow, turning you around.

“Y/n.” Your father. You took a breath as he grabbed you towards him and away from the group. The small Bridgerton group closely observed as the man pulled you away.

“This is Mr. Berclay. He will have your next dance.” You tried to control your face as you looked to the man next to your father. You normally don’t judge people completely based on looks, but the man your father was clearly trying to set you up with was definitely too old for you. And judging by the way he was leering at you, you could assume that intentions were not great and you already felt uncomfortable in his presence. You nodded and curtsied at the terrifying man and lowered your eyes to try to keep the tears in.

Anthony couldn’t believe it. It was like watching a nightmare come to life (and he didn’t know if it was his nightmare or yours...or both). The man your father told you, not asked you, to dance with was looking at you like he was going to eat you alive and he simply could not handle the terror in your eyes. The pure rage towards your father drove him to act without thinking, making his feet carry him towards you and stepping in between you and the man that was making you uncomfortable.

You felt a hand intercept yours that was reaching out towards Mr. Berclay’s outstretched hand and sparks shot through you. You looked up to find none other than the Viscount’s eyes softly looking at you.

“So sorry to interrupt Mr. Y/l/n, but Miss Y/l/n promised me her next dance and it’s about to start.” If you weren’t so tense, your jaw would have dropped to the floor right off your face. Dancing always made you think of Anthony and that first time you really saw him as the man you know now. And to think that you were going to dance with him in public... you could practically hear your younger self squealing with joy.

Your father’s jaw clenched, “Of course Viscount, take her.” Granted, if Anthony would have not had the title of Viscount, you were sure your father would have dismissed him. He waved his hand and Anthony pulled you briskly away by the hand. Once you got a distance away from your father you finally spoke.

“Thank you so much.”

“Don’t thank me. He shouldn’t be doing this to you.” Anthony said gently to you as you both got in position for the next dance.

You took a breath before the dance started, you were getting nervous to dance with Anthony, he was very talented on the floor and you wanted him to see how good you’ve gotten since you first learned.

“You’ve become quite the dancer.” Anthony remarked to you after a minute of dancing. You preened. 

“Thank you. I find it quite easy now, unlike when I was first learning.” You smiled. A grin cracked on his face.

“I do remember those days. I distinctly remember you falling backwards over the couch in the day room once dancing with Benedict.” His grin grew as he recalled the memory. Your cheeks flushed and a nervous giggle came out of your mouth as you looked away from his eyes towards the others on the dance floor.

“If Ben hadn’t made me laugh so hard, I wouldn’t have stumbled back and hit the couch in the first place. Not my finest moment.” You grinned, looking back at him to see him staring right back at you. 

“Well, thats why I stepped in to teach you. I am a much more effective teacher.” Your cheeks warmed as the shared look between you both seemed to grow more intense. You looked away and attempted to clear your head. You could not be getting your hopes up like this.

After a moment of silence, Anthony continued recalling memories and you tried your best to keep your laughter inside, or at least quiet.

“Look at them,” Colin observed. “You’d think he’d hung the stars the way she’s looking at him.”

“I think it’s most telling how Anthony is looking at her.” Violet Bridgerton said, walking up behind the group just in time to hear his comment. She rested her gloved hands onto the backs of Ben and Colin. “I haven’t seen him smile like that since… well, I’m not that sure. They are both glowing.”

“It’s simple really. They are meant to be.” Benedict stated.

[jgydidnothingwrong]

20 Questions Writer Meme

Tagged by @mostlikelytofangirl. Thank you for the tag. Everyone feel free to do it!!?

How many works do you have on AO3?

56, but some are Spanish versions of my own fics

What's your total AO3 word count?

429,526

What fandoms do you write for?

Currently? SVSSS and mdzs. I wrote for KHR too and whatever I, like, get ideas for??

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

"Come inside of my heart"

A light fic about Luo Binghe traveling between words by mistake and ending on Shen Yuan's room. My current baby.

"Euphoria"

Toji/Gojo. Straight up porn. XD.

"Sunset kiss"

Zosan, a really fluffy story about their first kiss, modern au (you know, that comercial au)

"Together again"

Another zosan fluff.

(is funny but the difference in kudos is so big between the first and the others. Also, I kinda don't remember why I write 😅)

"Dream a little dream of me"

This is an angsty fic about a Binghe who didn't come out of the Abyss. Includes a little cannibalism. Bingqiu, not exactly good end (i also think I needs heavily editing), but I like the concept very much.

Spoiler: Binghe traps himself in a dream.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to answer every one, even if I take a while to do it.

What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I have one fanfic on ff.net about the bad future in Katekyo Hitman Reborn, so that one. And maybe "Dream a little dream on me", but honestly, that's a question of perspective. Binghe was happy. Lol.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of what I write is happy ending 😅

Do you get hate on fics?

No, and I hope it will stay that way

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes. Idk what kind, just smut lol

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I wrote an SVSSS/mdzs and my baby "Greed, horror and love" that's basically an svss and mdzs characters in the Bloodchild from Octavia Butler universe. Aka, the alien au.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know off

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, Euphoria has a translation to russian. I usually translate them myself to Spanish/English

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not really

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Dino Cavallone and Hibari Kyoya and Sam and Dean Winchester, the level of obsession I have for those two ships!! (I think bingqiu and xiyao are starting to became my new obsessions tho)

What's a wip that you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I have so many, but I will love to finish some wip about Shen Jiu recovering his body post canon. Is all very traumatic for SJ, and for SY too, because well, his husband is in love with *that* body, so.

What are your writing strenghts?

Do i have those? I doubt it. My only strength is being conscious that I want to write, so I will.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I forgot to store my ideas and my memory is not good and I don't really like to describe clothes.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I don't do it.

Favorite fic you've ever written?

I like Silk Cage. I was so depressed after finishing mdzs and this was my vent fic, so... I helped me deal with my feelings over Jin GuangYao. I wrote that being sad and mad and even more sad. So it's important to me.

[divinctions]

✿ ━━━━ SARIYAH CARTER

Is that Brittany O'Grady ? oh, no, that's Sariyah Carter ! A twenty-six year old Art Curator at Casaplan who uses she/her pronouns. They currently live in Valparaíso, and the character they identify with most is Grace Violet from Skins. Hopefully they find their own little paradise here in el país de los poetas!

your resident softie just trying to enjoy the little things / more below

━━━━━━━━━  B A S I C S :

full name: sariyah joy carter

nickname(s): yah-yah, joy, sj

age: twenty - six .

race: african american / caucasian .

gender: cis woman .

pronouns: she / her .

orientation: biromantic / bisexual .

occupation: art curator for Santa Moneda’s Exhibition Gallery .

language(s) spoken: english, french, italian, learning spanish  .

━━━━━━━━━  P E R S O N A I L I T Y :

sariyah is the type to put others before herself no matter what; all it takes is one phone call for her to drop whatever she’s doing and run to them. Family, friends, strangers; no ask is too big and no thank you too small. there is no great compliment than being someone people knew they could depend on, but she struggles asking for help when she needs it. she tells herself she can handle everything on her own because she was raised to believe the worst thing a person can be is a burden. she’s not a prideful person and can openly admit to her faults. she’ll apologize even when she wasn’t the perpetrator  of conflict because keeping the peace means more to her than petty discourse, even if it was her feelings hurt at the end of the day. she finds it impossible to stand up for herself. It’s easy for others to use her as a doormat and she lets them do it. she’s much too frightened of disappointing people who have come to trust her so she’s mastered the inability to say no. she’s a dreamer. when she’s not trying to solve other people’s problems, or scouring the valparaíso streets for new artists, she’s doodling in the margins of her textbook or looking out the window envisioning a world where the opinions of others didn’t matter to her anymore. she tries to find joy in the little things and doesn’t let the small missteps consume her. she’s quick on her feet and can find solutions to her problems with ease. she works well under pressure as it was the only state she worked in growing up, and she does her best not to let those around see her sweat. again, the worst thing a lady could be was a burden. she romanticizes every aspect of her life for her own sake, every action holds weight, every place is more than just a building, and every word spoken has meaning. her existence becomes important because she makes it so. she offers the benefit of the doubt to everyone she meets; she doesnt have time for rumors or whispered disapprovals from people who just haven’t given someone a chance. she takes it upon herself to be the person to see the good in all. she holds her hands over the fire even after it gets warm; only pulling away once she’s burned but even then she’s sure she’ll heal and try again.

━━━━━━━━━  B A C K G R O U N D : tw self harm

as a child, everything was funny to sariyah. a rambunctious child skipping up and down with a song on her lips and flowers in her hair. But it was never her parents following after her up the spiral staircase in the main room of the carter estate. nannies tagged team on how to cut her off from getting away again as her parents busied themself with her older brother. whenever she’d stand in the door breathless and urging them to come play with her they’d close the parlor doors, blocking her view of them but more importantly their view of her. but there was freedom in feeling bare feet on cool granite, of staying in her nightgown on a saturday morning, she never understood why they wouldn’t join her. The more playful she became, the harder it seemed her parents, specifically her mother, tried to mold her into something more refined. she couldn’t play with the other kids with grass stains on their clothes and dirt beneath their nails. Instead, she sat in etiquette classes learning the differences in dinner utensils left to daydream of the kind of fun she didn’t have to sneak away for.

sariyah found a safe haven in school. the expensive private academies her parents sent her to were strict, tradition devoted, and soul sucking. she never made friends, she tried too hard and was much too awkward. the other kids didn’t like how she knew the answer to every question posed in class, or that her mom still dropped her off and picked her up at the same time promptly every morning. they considered her a prude, a snitch, someone uncool without ever getting to know her. even the clubs her mother forced her to join were ostracizing. it made her skin itchy with the knowledge that the kids would only speak to her out of obligation and not because they wanted to. but the school had an art studio. 

it was the only place she ever saw such vibrant colors, the only place she could take the worlds and feelings envisioned inside her head and personify them on canvas. it was her best kept secret. she penned her art under the name ‘ dove blossom ’ and left it in the supply closet, never taking ownership, no matter how many times the teacher had asked or compliments her work got. she was just happy that she got to keep creating without the worry of ridicule from her mother, or scrutiny from peers once they figured out it was her. but all good things eventually come to an end, and her identity was discovered. a teacher, who she thought had been long gone, had stayed later to catch the mysterious dove shim in the act and told her parents everything. there was a parent-teacher conference held, and at first you thought you were in trouble, but once your mother had heard the glowing review of your work from your teacher and students she didn’t see an imaginative flame she needed to snuff out; she saw an opportunity.

over the years, sariyah thought she was supposed to be happy. With her mother’s approval she could do all the painting she wanted, try any medium, buy all the latest tools and expensive paint; they turned her old piano room into an art studio, hired tutors, enrolled her in additional art classes, and lined up all the art schools she’d be applying to. She got into the royal college of art, had her own exhibit before she graduated, and was named the best new artist but multiple art journals before her senior year. Yet, she was so unhappy. This wasn’t how it was suppose to be. Her mother had taken her artistry and turned it into a machine. Her work wasn’t her own anymore. The vibrancy drained from each cavanas, the work became darker but no one thought she needed help. Her mother had everyone believe she was challenging herself. Trying new artforms. No matter how much she tried to speak up for herself, her mother would run her down.

TW; SELFHARM: feeling trapped and seeing no other way out, sariyah grew desperate; taking a mallet in the empty studio she worked in and slamming it on her right hand with all the adrenaline spiked strength she could. the pain was unimaginable, but so was the life for herself if she didn’t do this she thought, and managed to get two more hits in before the pain became too much TW; SELFHARM DONE. sariyah wasn’t thinking about the damage she’d done to her hand as whole, she’d only been concerned about ensuring that she couldn’t paint ever again. news that both crushed her and brought sweet relief when she heard it from the doctor himself. she’d still have use of her right hand, still be able to eat and drink and grab things, but the muscles were forever altered. there was no way she could withstand using her right hand to draw or write for long periods of time. she could no longer lift objects more then ten pounds with her right hand and it was better not to hold it in positions that were nearly closed ( like holding a paint brush ) or it cramp to the point of being rendered useless. sariyah was free. her mom was devastated. all of her hard work had just gone down the drain, but she wasn’t ready to give up yet.

several rehab centers, and soothsayers later sariyah no longer wanted to play into her mother’s fantasy. she’d given her mother too much of her life already. maybe it was because she knew her mother would be unmoving, or maybe sariyah just didn’t have it in her yet to defend herself, but she quietly booked a one way ticket to valparaíso and never looked back. she’s gone no contact with her parents. and it didn’t take them long to cut her off after that ( which she figured they’d do so she drained as much as she could out of her trust fund before her flight to hold her over until her new job started ). now sariyah is focused on the little things again, trying to find the vibrant colors in her day to day that she once loved so much and hoping she can mentor young artist in a way that doesn’t kill their creative spirit the way her mother killed hers.

━━━━━━━━━   H E A D C A N O N S :

sariyah comes from old money. the carter family owned the same car manufacturing business since the 1930s. their company distributes luxury vehicles all across milan, italy and the united kingdom. thanks to her brother they are in talks to begin importing to the united states.

grew up HELLA sheltered. her mom controlled her every day to day, from what time she woke up to what she wore to what she ate. She never had to do a chore or feed herself or shop for herself until she arrived in valparaiso so everything has been a really big learning experience so she has a notebook that’s her just jotting down helpful hints for her day to day like what a delicate wash on the washer means or how to use the chip on her debit card.

her first purchases when she got here was a mint lusso cruise bike and she loves that thing like its her first child. it’s her preferred mode of transportation even with all the hills in valparaíso and good exercise for her hands.

has a very weak right hand and often needs help carrying things, but will she ask? no. so instead, she takes longer to do things bc she has to keep taking breaks, but she does some aids like wagons or wheeled crates, and her basket on her bike. She has to wear a compression glove on her right hand most days to help with the pain an she has a wide assortment of color so she can match with her outfit as often as possible.

will stop a conversation right in the middle of it so she can voice record or jot down and that just came to her so she doesn’t forget, but can usually slip right back into conversation with ease.

she’s the type to buy/send herself flowers, but is a little embarrassed about admitting it so she’d rather just let people believe she has a secret admirer.

she does still draw, she has a notebook of half finished drawings because the aches in her hands never permit her to finish a drawing to completion and she’s found that she likes them more as unfinished works anyway.

Has to practice in the mirror before talking to potential artists for the exhibition gallery, or making a call to an industry worker, or ( god forbid ) having to talk to one. like has a prewritten script for any interaction that she has to bug a service worker.

buys and leave cat food out around the apartment complex for the stray kitties that are lurking, and usually always has treats in her bag.

Spends a lot of her time in the resident garden because she likes being around the pretty flowers and learning to pick herself bouquets and has been taking floral arranging classes. 

is a gamer girly ! specifically on switch but she does of a pc she can play on. definitely prefers cozy games because they're low effort. her favorites are disney dreamlight valley, genshin impact, and cozy grove currently. she can't play for long periods of time because her hand will start to cramp but she finds watching streams just as fun. would watch any friends play for hours too.

━━━━━━━━━   W A N T E D C O N N E C T I O N S : 

Can’t Go Back: Theres a lyric in this song thats like “And it breaks my heart to say i can’t wait to live without you” and i think that vibe fits perfectly for sariyah. I’m thinking this might have been a relationship she had before she lost her ailment got the best of her, and it was the kind of relationship that everyone thought was going to be forever, they were going to walk down the aisle together, but after losing her dream of being a painter a lot in sariyah changed. She wasn’t the same person, and holding on to the person she was in love with before that change happened felt like she’d be stuck somewhere she wasnt meant to be anymore so breaking up with them was the best decision for her, and now they’re both in valparaiso !!! ooooohhhhhh and we can discuss timing and where they stand together but thats the vibes!!

Lacy: I would love a kind of best friendship based on lacy by olivia rodrigo. Very complicated and nuanced. Probably grew up together, maybe in the same art circle so their work was always compared to one another or maybe this muse is a lot more popular and finds it a lot easier than sariyah does and because of the ailment ( that she suffered in silence with ) sariyah sometimes perceived that everything just came so easy to your muse no matter how hard sariyah tried which makes her resent this muse from time to time but at the end of the day thats her best friend so she’s constantly feeling so conflicted on how to move forward when she cant go anywhere without the person she feels is holding her back.

Jeanine and Barbara type friendship: basically Sariyah vying for their approval and acceptance she thinks theyre super cool ideally someone older than her 30+ bc mommy issues on full display but yknow let her be insufferable with friendship.

Helpless crush:  these two hint it off the moment they met. growing closer with every day, and spending almost every minute with each other. but somewhere down the line this muse began developing feelings that went beyond friendly liking. but every mention of a relationship was laughed off by sariyah because her naive mind believing their conversations on a life spent together were just pretend. a way they would joke to make her feel better when it becomes too much again. But this could also go the other way as well, they can also be pathetic!!!

[carlpalmer]

tagged by @wanderinstar thank you so much camila!! 💖

What book are you currently reading? i WAS reading the young bucks book. im a real intellectual

What’s your favorite movie you saw in theaters this past year? the one piece movie and i don't even go there. never seen a single episode. my friend invited me to go with her lol last movie i watched that i actually picked was everything everywhere all at once

What do you usually wear? just the basics lmao i either go pastel rainbow or black. i mostly wear pants and a t-shirt, jacket etc if i go out. i need to overcome my embarrassment of wearing shorts and other stuff outside

How tall are you? 1.60 m

What’s your star sign? Do you share a birthday with a celebrity or a historical event? cancer. i share a birthday with soccer player zinedine zidane whom you may remember as the guy who headbutted another player at the 2006 world cup and brazilian actress dercy gonçalves, a deceased old woman who cursed 838 times per second. only normal people <3

Do you go by your name or nickname? i go by my first name

Did you grow up to become what you wanted to be when you were a child? i wanted to be an artist, more specifically a painter, or a performer of any kind (singer, drummer, actress) so no

Are you in a relationship? If not who is your crush if you have one? no and i only have celeb crushes 😔 never beating the simp allegations

What’s something you’re good at vs something you’re bad at? good at languages, bad at ALL sports. name a sport. i will suck at it

Dogs or cats? cats

If you draw/write, or create in any way, what’s your favorite picture/favorite line/favorite etc. from something you created this past year? haven't done anything this past year other than doodling and drawing my cat who died but i didn't like the outcome lmao i will try again sometime. i did make some exercises and games for my job that were kinda creative and kids liked tho

What is something you would like to create content for? much like camila i wanted to get back into making gifs of my fave bands and drawing and probably learning how to play the flute too. god give me some discipline this year please!!!

What’s something you’re currently obsessed with? uh oh.. my fave bands (rush, genesis, the offspring etc) and finding new music, as always, wrestling (aew) and the tv show our flag means death (still 💀)

What’s something you were excited about that turned out to be disappointing this past year? new years eve!! it's my favorite holiday but after midnight we had a "fight" and it kinda ruined the mood. i wanted to go out to see the christmas decorations but whenever i went out, it rained. i also wanted to go to a concert but there were none i was able to afford or was rly interested in. im seeing sj and STEVE HACKETT this year so all is okay now!!!

What’s a hidden talent of yours? i have great memory, esp photographic memory. im the annoying geography nerdy kid who can point at a map and tell you where most countries of the world are (except for some islands maybe). im also very good at organization and making objects fit into cabinets, drawers etc. aaand i can tell every single rush song (and maybe other bands too) within the first 0, 1 seconds

Are you religious? no

What’s something you wish to have at this moment? 1) infinite money so i wouldn't have to work 2) courage, assertiveness, dedication AND energy 3) more concert tickets

tagging @mikerutherford @fullfightmami @shirleywatts @walkintheshadows

[adaptive-radiation]

I posted 2,066 times in 2022

That's 2,066 more posts than 2021!

61 posts created (3%)

2,005 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@bandtrees

@teeth-kid

@gr33nthund4rf4n

@evilneo

@atlcscp

I tagged 1,845 of my posts in 2022

Only 11% of my posts had no tags

#art - 323 posts

#deltarune - 109 posts

#video - 108 posts

#kind - 76 posts

#yeah - 65 posts

#pink to blue means i love queue - 61 posts

#sdfghjk - 53 posts

#sj - 52 posts

#advice - 47 posts

#nichijou - 45 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#because i feel that this is the sort of idea where you put away some ideal and lose hope in it but then take the matter into your own hands

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Look in his mouth

LITTLE BEAKY.

3 notes - Posted May 17, 2022

#4

Hey what's up its Aayushi!

old urls: photoelectric-effect, maggie-tullivers, freaking-out--is-my-okay

Other information: marmots are cool

3 notes - Posted May 16, 2022

#3

Glad the Aztec calendar oreos post is going round again

Some of my other favorite iconic Tumblr posts would be

"I go through the 7 stages of grief when I get out of bed" "What are the last two?" "Denial 2 and Astral Projection"

"Decrease the increase" "Who's that saultry little binch on the bottom left" "This post is less than 1℅ away from being totally incomprehensible"

"You may ask yourself what? And you may ask yourself, huh???"

3 notes - Posted September 23, 2022

#2

How to Be a Human Being is not a musical but aghhhhh it sort of reminds me (conceptually, not musically/in terms of the sound) a little bit of 35MM, a musical where each song is inspired by a different photo and has a different subject, cause each song in HTBAHB is also about a different character and is big on visuals

I love both album and cast recording and I really like snippets of different people’s lives as a premise and I also really like photography :D

3 notes - Posted November 17, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

God damn the JOKES on the Spamton Sweepstakes page the LORE the fact that apparently RTVS of all people acted in the stream video? And apparently it’s analog horror?? Toby Fox just never disappoints

15 notes - Posted September 19, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

Thanks to all my mutuals for staying on for some reason and especially the three people on this site who've actually managed to put up with interacting with me, @everyday-is-brighter-with-you @bandtrees, and @starthenarrator. In a moment of sappiness I will say I'm really grateful to have had you guys in my phone and my life!

[elizmanderson]

Meet the Writer Tag

thank you to @vcaudley for the tag!

Rules: use this picrew to make yourself and answer the questions.

Three fun facts about me:

I showed llamas in 4H as a kid

I have four chickens and a cat

I'm queer and neurodivergent and have an invisible illness

Favourite season: spring/fall

Continent where I currently live: North America

How I spend my time: writing, binge-watching the same 10 shows over & over again, reading, casual birding, occasional painting or collage, singing while I take long drives in my car, and long walks in the woods wherein I try to become one with the trees (no luck yet)

also I work full time, but who cares about that except for the paycheck lmao

Are you published?: yessirreebob! my debut novel, The Remarkable Retirement of Edna Fisher, released on April 21 from Hansen House Books. I also have poetry in Wizards in Space (no. 5) and short stories in Awakenings: A Cute Mutants Anthology (edited by SJ Whitby), Wyldblood Press's From the Depths: A Fantasy Anthology (edited by Mark Bilborough), and Dark Horses: The Magazine of Weird Fiction (no. 4), with another forthcoming from Gutslut Press.

(these are BookShop.Org links - except WiS, which can't be bought through BookShop - and they're affiliate links for me just fyi.)

Introvert or extrovert: introvert, introvert, introvert.

Favourite meal: it depends on my mood and I go through cycles where I eat the same thing over and over, but recent go-tos are dumplings or panko chicken curry

Tagging (with no pressure): @victoriacbooks @amarajlynn @cassbeewrites

[strawbkoo]

WIP TAG GAME

rule: post the names of all the files in your WIP folder regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it!

a/n: big thank u to @jiminpitys for tagging me in this (check their works out!!), smooches <33 looking thru my wip folder makes my brain hurt, why do i start n never complete anything oof

send me an ask abt these or anything else or read my existing fics here

jjk

teach the virgin, oh how fun [typical 'yn knows nothing abt sex!!! i will teach them!!!' au]

oh lord, save me, my drug is my baby [pwp where yn is on the phone heh]

"how about we change that?" [bad first time, trying again but with vigour!!!]

what i (shouldn't) love about you [heartbreak central, chaptered fic w childhood friends]

under the desk, love the way your lips part to fit my name [... this is v filthy .... I'm embarrassed]

inked fingers [yn is obsessed w this twt acc that posts their hands... oh, wait, why does the new prof have the same tatts???]

pure filth, pls enjoy [it is what it is]

D-I-L-F [besties dad has a nice dick]

ram me against a wall and fk me quiet [angstier than u think]

rope bunny [subby jjk owns my heart]

th

midnight hits and my heart breaks [nye heartbreak]

angels take you to heaven, but the devil himself will bring heaven to you [taetae just wants to eat yns soul, but ur horny]

rejection at its worse [wedding au,, but ouchies]

jm

pretty boy, prettier moans [dom jm but he moans... a lot]

silk sheets [angsty angst, jm is trying his best]

nj

wet dream [can't look at u but can't keep his eyes off ur ass]

p*$$y fairy [based on the song by Jhene Aiko -> v sensual]

jh

sir, spit on me [post hobipalooza smutty shenanigans]

yg

"your mouth would look better stuffed with my fingers" [.... okay but hear me out]

sj

have my heart in your hands [sj has to choose, but yn makes it difficult]

baby dilf [sj doesn't know how hot he is, so yn shows him]

legs on his shoulders - damn am i that flexible??? [essentially ur horny n wanna try something w sj n his pacific ocean shoulders]

a/n: tagging @jeonqkooks and @sparklingchim bc i wanna know some wips ur working on hehe

send me an ask about any of these

[traumatizedjaguar]

I was expelled from my first college. There was this group of students there that kinda bullied me and I became suicidal and started self-harming and then I eventually got angry at them because I blamed them for causing that and I kinda got in the mentality of a school shooter and I harassed them really badly and texted them a bunch of death threats. I transferred colleges and got help and I thought it was behind me until one day I randomly got harassed online by one of them and I again went overboard with my revenge. I've worked really hard to redeem myself but sometimes I feel like I'm forever scarred by the experience.

Same anon as before. That wasn't the first time I did something like that. A few years ago, there was this really homo/transphobic anti-sj blog on this site that was run by a minor who would stalk my tag and blog and reblog my posts just to call me names and talk about me in their FAQ just so their followers would harass me. One day I felt really provoked by them so I sent them messages back trying to convince them to stop being homophobic and I tried to be really gentle about it while they were blatantly nasty. They then said that I harassed them to the point of a suicide attempt and told their followers to attack me again. That person was pretty nasty but I still feel guilt knowing I may have caused a suicide attempt.

Thanks for sharing. Also if you’re even around anymore as this is an edit: I doubt you harassed them to the point of suicide they could be using that as a way to control you and make you feel like the guilty party. I’m sorry you were abused/bullied by your peers.

[frenchy-and-the-sea]

Favorite Works of 2020

I was tagged by @focsle, thank youuuu! My total posted word count this year ended up being about half what it has been the last two years, which is admittedly a little disappointing. But having a difficult time choosing works for this made me feel a touch better about that whole thing. :’)

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5(ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

1. My first entry for kiss week this year, which was one of those rare pieces where the idea I had for it going in feels like it came through in the finished product! Plus, I just desperately miss my Tea Party Trio, so it was nice to be able to write for them again.

2. I wrote a poor rendition of the scene that ended our first in-person session for my main d&d game, mere weeks before covid hit. Not only does it feel like I managed to capture some of the bits of the scene that our DMs lovingly crafted for us, but it feels like the moment of unity that we all really needed before we were thrown headfirst into the pandemic proper, though we didn’t know it at the time. That feels important now.

3. In an effort to make myself feel loosely a part of Art Fight, I wrote this bit for @rufinagertrude and I truly think it’s one of my better attempts at dialogue. Partially, I think, for the company of Tristan’s Misfortune, who has a silver tongue in his own right, but I’ll take a little credit at least. ;)

4. I wrote this piece because I was and am sappy as all hell, lmao. Contrary to my constant posting of pieces involving Alex and Adelina, I don’t write “romantic” things very often, so it was nice that this piece felt like it captured some of that stumbling awkwardness of a developing relationship! 

5. I’ve peddled this one around for the last week or so, but I’m genuinely happy with how this last piece of 2020 came out. I wrote it in exactly two days, no do-overs or large rewrites, and I think it does what I set out to do with it. Not much else a writer can ask for than that.

Special bonus shout out goes to this piece, which spurred a couple of other people to write something in a similar style. I loved reading all of them so, so much, and I’m so happy with the thought that my brief spurt of poetry-brain might have brought some of them on!!

I tag @rufinagertrude, @thereluctantinquisitor, @themilokin, @urdnotgrunt, @phoenix-failing, @elalavella, @sternenstaub28, @leothelionsaysgrrrr, @ghilenan, @beansprean, @cobaltash, @staches-and-sabres, @captainsaku, @gwisincon, @dovahgarbage, @bladeverbena, and @hobbithase, as well as anyone who sees this and wants to take a crack at it! I am tagging you, interested person reading this!

[starrybouquet]

WIP Folder Tag Game

Rules: I will post all the names of all the files in my WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous, and tag as many people as I have WIPs to do the same. Send me an ask with the title that most intrigues you and I’ll post a little snippet of it or tell you something about it.

So at last count I had 70-something documents that were technically WIPs, and that was a few weeks ago. I've pared it down so that these are all files that contain more than a random sentence that I wrote at 3am with no context and no idea of what was going to happen after that. Have fun....this list is WILD!

AMTDI - S/J - M

"This man had delusions of grandeur," the alien pronounced

A serious relationship

Medieval SciFi AU

Five times Jack calls Sam ma'am

In All Duty and Service

Invert AU

RPF I'll never post

Paradise Lost post-ep

it's quiet uptown

pain med Jack

When the war was over...

The Best Part Ch 2

For God and Country

SJ Headcanon Drabbles

I called him sir

Telepathy prequel

RPF random

Xmas Telepathy

mad about DC...again

RDA becomes a hockey player AU

Ace SJ

Hallmark Shipmas

Wedding Dress Fic

football AU

King Midas

Five times Jack didn't get married

Five ways Joe Faxon died a horrible death

Rearview Mirror

Sea ch 2

Daniel on Daniel violence

Smarts

Friday Nights

New Guard

Season 9-10 AU

The Scorns of Time

Home Comforts

Amnesia cliche fic

Jealous Sam

Colors

Hexes

(That's still way way way too long. Ack!)

Tagging @carothepoet @scullybeane @fine-with-my-spite @sententiousandbellicose @mylittleredgirl @mrv3000 @tinknevertalks @captaincarriekathryncoffee @delicatelie89 and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it! Seriously, anyone. I've been semi-Tumblr absent so I feel like I've forgotten a bunch of you. Apologies. I promise it's not intentional.

EDIT: Fuck fuck fuck I forgot to thank the awesome, wonderful @i-am-a-stupid-robot who did the lovely thing of TAGGING me in this. I am, in this case, the stupid robot. Also thank you, friend! <3

[kippykasey]

Dog Tags

Pairing: Bucky x Reader , Bucky x SJ (Reader's Son)

Words: 1626

Summary: Bucky has to go away on a mission but leaves his dog tags with the Reader.

Author's Note: This is just a quick little thing I wrote up after receiving my Bucky dog tags in the mail. Its not edited or anything so if there are any mistakes I apologize.

No warnings just a bit of fluff.

Dating was still a fairly new experience for Bucky Barnes. Sure he used to be a bit of a sweet talker back in his younger years but now, things were just different. So two months ago when Sam set him up on a blind date Barnes was nothing but hesitant. That was until he arrived at the diner that Sam had made the reservation for, that hesitation instantly warped into irritation and slight anger. The little classic diner was going all out on a special ‘Dapper Days’ event. Everyone was dressed in their best classic looks. Sam, while laughing, definitely got an earful from Bucky after the date. Though he now understood why Sam suggested he wear a modified version of his old army uniform, since he no longer fit the original. In the diner, he noticed that most women were dressed in more of the later ‘vintage’ looks popular from around the 50s and 60s which made it very easy for one woman in particular to stand out.

She was dressed in the same style he was so familiar with seeing ladies in from his younger days. From the slouch hat tipped on her perfectly styled hair, down to the Oxfords on her feet she looked something straight out of the thirties. Better yet, she was sitting at the same table Sam had reserved for him and his blind date.

(Y/n) (L/n) was friends with Sarah Wilson, and had been since Sam left for the Airforce. The two bonded over having someone in the service. So when Sarah agreed to have her go on the blind date Sam set up she agreed as well. (Y/n)’s grandmother was a seamstress so she knew all about women’s fashion and she always has a soft spot for the look from the 30s so when she found out the location of the date and the dress code she dug through a few boxes of her grandmother’s things till she pulled out the outfit she would wear. After much research she figured out how to do her hair and make up to match that most commonly done during the time and she was pleasantly surprised how well her look came out.

Needless to say that one dinner between the two turned into two and then more dates happened. It was a month into their relationship when (Y/n) finally trusted Bucky enough to tell him about her son, Sammy James. SJ was five, turning six in a few short months, when Bucky met him the first time. The little boy was unsure about Bucky at first but it didn’t take long, one soothed nightmare, for the boy to become attached to the super soldier. Bucky would go on a few missions with Sam never being gone longer than a few days. That was until now.

Bucky was sitting in (Y/n)’s kitchen waiting for her and SJ to get home from the store. He had just gotten off the phone with Sam about a mission that would keep him away from home for over a week. He didn’t know how he was going to talk about this. His body tensed as the door opened. SJ ran in yelling a ‘hello’ to Bucky before running to his room to play. (Y/n) entered the kitchen, Bucky jumping up to help her with the bags in her arms. “Thank you James.” She set down the bags and turned to kiss his cheek. As she leaned away she instantly could see the furrows in his brow from his deep thoughts. “Hey, what’s wrong?” Her voice was soft and gentle. Her hands pulled him closer making him wrap his arms around her.

Bucky’s head tilted forward till he rested his forehead on hers. “James,” She cooed his name in encouragement. The blue eyes looking down at her closed for a moment as he took a deep breath. “Sam called. We have a job to do.” He spoke softly not wanting to draw SJ’s attention. “This isn’t the first time you’ve gone on a mission James.” She caressed his cheek gently. Eyes fluttered open, blue eyes once again looking down at her. “I’ll be gone longer this time.” That did catch her attention.

“You’ll come back to me, soldier boy. You always do.” She smiled up at him after taking a moment to realize how much this was bothering him. Bucky rose his head, pressing his lips to her forehead. “You’re so good to me.” He mumbled before stepping back to help her put away the groceries while talking about when he would leave in the morning.

That night Bucky spent time with his girl and his little man who after dinner showed him what he was working on at school. Bucky didn’t want the night to end. Yet he knew it would happen even as he stood at the door to say goodnight. As Barnes went to leave the house (Y/n) caught him by the dog tags hanging by his neck. “Whoa there soldier. If you’re going to be gone I expect a kiss before you go.” The smile she got in return was wide and bright, his head ducking down to kiss her. “Doll, will you do something for me?” He asked her. The woman nods her head. The man pulled the chain off of his neck before draping it over her head. “Keep these safe for me? I’ll be back for them.”

It had been two weeks since Bucky left. Sam had contacted Sarah to update both his sister and (Y/n) to the prolonged return. The delay did make the woman worry for her boyfriend but she never let her mind dwell on the thought until late at night after her son was already in bed. Like tonight, it was nearly ten, SJ had been asleep for two hours now and she was on her second glass of wine, curled up on the bench in the nook of the window. Normally she would be reading but tonight she was staring at the stars lost in wandering thoughts about if James Buchanan Barnes was okay.

A knock on the door startled her from her thoughts. Her eyes glanced at the clock on the wall as she set down the empty wine class that she was holding. On her way to the door she grabbed the metal bat that she had a habit of keeping near the door for protection. With one peek out of the peephole in the door the bat clattered to the wood floor. With fumbling fingers she rushed to unlock and open the door. There on the other side was Bucky, backpack hanging over his shoulder, still dressed in his usual suit and tired eyes as the corner of his mouth turned upwards. “Hey doll.”

(Y/n) jumped, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck. The backpack hit the ground as his arms wrapped around her. “I’m sorry it’s so late.” He mumbled kissing her head before they pulled apart. “It’s fine I’m just glad you’re home.” She smiled up at him. Bucky’s eyes lowered down from her face to her neck where he expected to see at least the chain from his tags but nothing other than the neckline of her shirt was visible. The gleam in his eyes dimmed as he looked back up and she knew instantly.

With a bend of her finger the two entered the house, Bucky locked the door behind him and left his bag by the door. (Y/n) led him up the stairs, down the hall to the door of her son’s room. The sleeping boy didn’t stir as she flicked on the light. Bucky leaned over her shoulder looking in at the sleeping boy, there around his neck was the chain of his dog tags. Blue eyes trailed down the chain to the two metal tags clasped tightly in the boy’s hand. The boy on the bed shifted, his eyes fluttering open for a moment before shutting again. A heartbeat later his eyes were open again, looking at the door with a sleepy smile, “Daddy?”

Shock filled the super soldier as he glanced down at the woman in front of him for some kind of sign. He saw her encouraging smile and tilt of her head and that was all it took for him to move into the room. He knelt down next to the bed and reached out to push the boy’s hair back like he had many times before. “Hey kid. I just wanted to see you, go back to sleep.” He told the boy kissing his head. “Missed you.” The tired boy mumbled, closing his eyes again. Bucky stood and left the room once the boy was asleep again. Standing in the hallway his face now contorting in confusion he looked over at the woman a foot away.

“He woke up from a nightmare a week ago. AJ told him a scary story and he thought the monster was coming after him. I might have told him that you were out there fighting the monster before it got to him. I gave him the tags because he kept playing with them, he hasn’t taken them off since. He called you dad for the first time yesterday. If you’re not okay with it we can talk to him about it.” She explained before starting to ramble as she got nervous about how he might feel about the situation.

Lips pressed to her stopping her worried rambles long enough for her to notice the smile on his face. “Doll, I love you and I love SJ. I told you I would be back and here I am. I don’t plan on going anywhere.”

[dc41896]

New Roommate

Pairing: Paul DiskantxBlack Reader

⚠️: Fluff, slight mentions of seggsy time

“We’re gonna have so much fun bubbas. We’re gonna go to the park, on hikes-oh! And the beach! I already know you’re gonna love it,” you beam rubbing noses with the two-month, blue nose pitbull who was trying to lick your face. “First though, I gotta get your dad on board.”

It’s not that your boyfriend didn’t want or like dogs. He always said how he’d love to have one someday when he was settled somewhere.

However that “somewhere” to Paul was a house with plenty yard space, an adequate amount of privacy, and maybe located in the suburbs. Not your recently renovated, two bedroom apartment you both just happened to move into about a month ago.

You made an agreement that you wouldn’t get any pets (well besides a fish, and a small one at that) to not risk messing anything up and having some sort of consequence, which would more than likely be in monetary form. Entranced by the short haired, too adorable for words pup though, you honestly could care less about the consequences.

Plus you just knew your little buddy wouldn’t cause any trouble. You could see that in his round, soft grey eyes.

“So, you’re gonna stay with your auntie Raye until I can work my charm on him okay?” The pup only tilts his head before letting out a small bark and making you pout as you hug him close. “I know but it’s only temporary. A night at most.”

Paul typically didn’t get home until later in the evening now that he was on a new case, so you had plenty of time to clean up any traces of dog left behind after Raye would leave and start cooking his favorite meal. As an added bonus, you also thought about your short, lilac, ruched number with spaghetti straps that always made his eyes light up when you wore it. He claimed it perfectly complimented your skin and made you look even more angelic as his hands always seemed to find your sides, the small of your back, or lower if you were right beside him (which of course you typically were).

However, hearing the familiar thud of boots journeying down the hall and rattling of keys, something told you that plan might not work now.

You quickly stand up, taking the probably confused puppy with you to the bathroom where you sit him in the empty tub, along with his new bone shaped chew toy, kneeling with a finger over your lips.

“Stay here and be really quiet okay?,” you whisper just as you hear the front door unlock. Quietly rushing to close the room door behind you, you muster your best ‘I wasn’t doing anything’ smile while you approached the tired looking man.

“Hey beautiful,” he greets, sweetly pecking your lips.

“Hey, you’re home early today.”

“Yea, we had a break in the case and went undercover to get the suspect which led to a chase, then a fight, and me having bruises forming as we speak.”

Dropping his bag by the dinner table, a sigh followed by a short wince leaves his mouth as he sinks into the leather couch cushions letting his head fall back and eyes close.

“Alright plan B it is,” you think to yourself moving behind him to gently massage his shoulders, occasionally letting your hands journey forward along his pecs giving them attention as well. Hearing a soft moan at his approaching relaxed state urges you to continue, knowing you’d soon have him exactly where you wanted.

“Aww I’m sorry babe. Where does it hurt?”

“My sides mostly, but my back a bit too.”

He helps you remove his fitted black shirt, a favorite of yours, letting out a short hiss from having to extend his sore muscles. Guiding him to lie down and placing one of the small throw pillows under his head, you straddle his lap letting your fingers drag along the red and light blue marks littering his sides.

“It doesn’t hurt when you breathe does it?”

“No.”

“What about this?,” you ask pressing down to feel him flinch under you.

“Ow! Babe-,”

“Sorry! Sorry just checking.” Watching him settle back into his comfortable position with arm draped over his forehead, you slowly bend forward, lips inches from his bruise looking up at your boyfriend through your lashes. “And this?”

You feel his low chuckle vibrate his muscular upper body as your gentle, open mouthed kisses scatter from each injury to eventually find the spot just below his ear.

“I feel better already,” he smiles tilting your chin so your soft lips could meld with his. Kiss growing deeper with each passing second.

“Hooked like a fish,” you thought, lips never ceasing while being brought closer to his body as he sat up with hands squeezing your hips.

“Baby wait,” he states slightly leaning his head back and making you pout. “Let me go shower first. I’m sweaty and probably stink-,”

“What’s the point when you’re just gonna get sweaty again?,” you smirk taking his now red, fuller bottom lip between your teeth.

“All the more reason for you to join me then.” You can’t fully enjoy the combination of his tongue and lips on your neck from your brain hurriedly trying to figure out how to stop this man from finding your little surprise in the bathroom.

“Your, um..sides though! You know it’s gonna hurt trying to shower so just stay here with me.”

“Is there a reason you don’t want me going in our bathroom?,” he asks detaching from your neck with one final bite to eye you suspiciously.

“No, of course not. I just missed you.” Batting your lashes, you nonchalantly let your nail trace a line from where his pendant sat down the middle of his abdomen and just above his buckle before he shifted, swiftly lying you on your back with one hand hooked under your knee bringing it around his waist.

Men. Always so easy.

Giggling as thumbs graze the lower band of your bra and lips return to their assault on your neck and collarbone, a high pitched bark along with scuffling makes you freeze as Paul lifts his head confused.

“You heard that right?”

“Y-Yeah. It’s probably from one of the neighbors. Speaking of dogs though-”

When the barks and scuffling become more frequent, you start to wonder if Raye would mind you staying the night since you’d surely need a place to stay with Paul being mad at you.

“Nah that sounds really close,” he replies unhooking your leg to go investigate for himself. The only thing you can do is sit and nervously wait for the inevitable hearing him open the bedroom door and eventually enter the bathroom. “Honey...!”

“Hmm?!,” you ask biting the corner of your lip, turning your head at the sound of Paul padding across the wooden floor holding the noisy pup.

“Mind telling me why this little guy was in our tub?”

“....Maybe he was a gift from the front office?,” you innocently shrug making him bring his free hand to his hip, sternly looking at you.

“Y/N...,”

“Alright. My coworker and I were bored one day and started looking through the pets the shelter had for adoption online and this little guy came across the screen and stole my heart.”

“Babe we talked about this. We can’t mess this place up.”

“I know and we won’t. Before you came home, we just hung out in here and he was so calm and sweet. Even in the tub he sat there like a good boy,” you smile standing up to scratch behind his ears making his tail wag against Paul’s side.

“That’s because he couldn’t get out since the tub is taller than him,” he retorts as you roll your eyes taking your new baby from his grasp.

“Cmon Paul look at this face and tell me you can say no.”

Holding the puppy at his eye level, there’s a few moments of silence as the two simply look at each other before the grey haired dog licks his cheek making him groan.

“You know I can’t say no. To either of you,” he softly smiles petting the short fur on his head. Seeing your pout as you bring your new friend next to your face, he lowly chuckles caressing your cheek as his lips find yours. “Alright he can stay.”

“Thank you!,” you excitedly squeal bouncing on the balls of your feet. “I already have the perfect name picked out.”

“What’s that?”

“Disco. After his dad,” you both laugh.

“Well, welcome to the family Disco,” he smiles taking him from your hands to place him on the floor where he began to sniff around getting acclimated to his new home. You’re caught off guard when you’re tossed over his broad shoulder, blood rushing to your head as you gently kick your legs laughing.

“Paul!”

“Disco, look after everything. Me and mom have some unfinished business,” he smirks closing the bedroom door behind him with his foot.

Taglist: @fumbling-fanfics @honeydulcewrites @honeychicana @lady-olive-oil @themyscxiras @melinda-january @lovelymari4 @maxcullen @literaturefeen @damnitaa @curlyhairclub @plokyu23 @fullofmelaninsarcasmandepression @nunubug99 @felicity-x0 @ellixthea @jojolu @jnk-812 @brwn-sgr @captainsamwlsn @wildfirecracker @nina-sj @iammyownlover @chaneajoyyy @scoop93535 @secretmysteriousperson

If anybody wants to be tagged, has asked to be tagged but don’t see your name, only want to be tagged for certain people I write for (can be found in masterlist), or no longer wish to be tagged just let me know🤓!

[dramaism]

gifmaker appreciation tag

rules: answer the first half of the questions with gifsets of your own, then answer the second half by tagging gifmakers you love!

tagged by: @surii @thingskateknows @jaehwany thank you all so much! admire you and appreciate you as well 💕

LINK A GIFSET…

Link a gifset you’re really proud of:

i’m proud of every compilation quote gifset i make because it’s always a disaster to choose scenes and quotes, i’m losing it all every time. but if i have to choose one it would be this vincenzo 1-20ep compilation set. i’m proud of myself that i managed to logically put 20 episodes of relationships in 10 gifs. phew, that was a ride!  

Link a gifset where you tried something new:

i tried a lot of new things on this days gifset with myul mang - typography, blending, colors etc. and i really love it! i think this one is my favorite in this month. also i tried new things with gradient text on this run on characters set. it turned out really pretty, love it!

Link a gifset that features your favorite character or celebrity: 

exhibit one, two and three. my love for my queen hong cha young will never die 💖

Link a gifset that you want more people to see:

definitely this colorful run on gifset with blending! and i don’t know why i like this so much but this totnt gifset. this is just a dialogue scene maybe i love it because of the acting.

Link a gifset that you had fun making:

again every compilation set with quotes lol. from the most recent ones i think it would be this days bickering/flirting set and this heart eyes joon hwi set.

Link a gifset that you created as part of a meme, challenge, or series:

this colorful tale of nokdu gifset. i made it for ‘kdrama over flowers’. it counts, right? 

Link a gifset of yours that makes you smile:

this one jk and sj bickering set from true beauty. make me smile every time lmao.

Link a gifset that you made for someone else:

 i’ve never made a gifset for anyone tbh.

TAG SOMEONE WHO…

Tag someone who inspired you to start making gifs:

well, i started making gifs 5 years ago and it’s quite hard to remember but i guess it was someone from doctor who or sense8 fandom.

Tag someone who makes great vibrant gifs:

it’s hard to choose someone in particular because for me everyone makes such vibrant sets. but i must give a shout out to @cescedes, @damn-salvatore and @mercurialhigh! did you see their gifs? they are amazing ✨ ✨ ✨

Tag someone who makes great pale/pastel gifs:

i’m not sure what consider pale/pastel sets but i think @mostlyfate is the best in this!

Tag someone who gifs for a fandom you love:

i think we have same taste in dramas and shows with @jaehwany and @uppoompat because they always gif for the fandoms i love, also @cuddlybitch for law school (doing the god’s work!!!), for all korean dramas - @yesdramas and @metawin for bl dramas 😍

Tag someone who uses text/typography really well in their gifsets:

for 100% @baijingting and @deokmis!!! they’re always doing it perfectly and trying new things in their sets. also i don’t know how @jaehwany turns simple quote set into aesthetic masterpiece. I’m amazed by their creativity and skills 

Tag someone who motivates you to step up your game:

definitely @mercurialhigh and @cuddlybitch!!! i genuinely don’t know how they are so talented in using colors that well, with blending and typography. i’m always like ‘omg, your mind!’. i’m in awe and want to get better in what i make because of them 😍   

Tag someone who you have taken inspiration from:

everyone, just everyone. i’m following a lot of people from kdrama fandom they’re all so talented and skillful. also a lot of people from other fandoms started giffing kdramas and sharing their incredible sets. they all definitely inspire me to gif more and more.

Tag gif makers who you admire and appreciate! (Put as many people here as you want!):

@siwanim @damn-salvatore @cescedes @ahjuummas @metawin @trendingkdrama @zhouszishu @theghostvalley @tiesanjiao @kojiseok @chaeunwoo @ryn-s (i tried so hard to tag people who haven’t done it yet but i admire and appreciate every creator i follow!!) but honestly i tag every creator that will see this, give yourself some love 💜 💙 💚

[megalony]

After the show

This is a Harry Styles imagine that I hope everyone is going to enjoy, feedback is always appreciated.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogermeddow @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction @ambi-and-sunflowers @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @peterquillzsblog @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg @allauraleigh

Masterlist

Summary: Harry and (Y/n) finish up a show and he helps her when she doesn’t feel very well.

Enjoy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

With a sigh of utter relief, (Y/n) moved her hand to rub at her neck where a particular muscle was beginning to tighten like it was on a string that was being tightened.

The heels of her shoes clicked against the metal stairs she descended down, trying to hurry and get herself to the dressing room and change before it was time to disappear from this venue and get some much needed sleep. She couldn't have been more thankful that there was no meet and greet after this particular concert, in fact, a lot of the shows on this tour didn't have a meet and greet after the show and it was a God-send to (Y/n). As much as the fans meant to her, the concerts always took every ounce of energy and reserves she had left and trying to keep up the act of pretending to be okay wouldn't be easy after a concert.

It took all (Y/n) had not to grimace and groan in discomfort when the tightening feeling in her neck spread up until it spiralled around her jaw that was becoming very tense as of late. The aching in her jaw felt like someone was hacking away at the bone with a hammer, chipping little pieces off and causing (Y/n) the most pain but also drawing that pain out to make it last.

The ending of the concert couldn't have come soon enough for her liking. Being out there performing to the crowds was something she knew she wanted to do for the rest of her life because it was everything (Y/n) ever wanted. But doing this for the rest of her life didn't seem like a possibility when finishing this current tour was turning into a difficult task in itself.

When (Y/n) turned a sharp left corner and headed into the dressing room backstage she just caught sight of Harry following her and she shivered at the sympathetic look she could see in his eyes.

The pair had been doing this joint tour for two months now and Harry could never quite seem to be able to overcome the sadness that washed through him whenever he saw the pain (Y/n) went through. When he saw her coming off stage looking like she was about to cry from pain was not something he thought he would ever have to witness. It made Harry sad that doing the job she loved gave her so much pain because if singing gave him half as much pain as it did her, he wouldn't know if it was truly worth it.

Harry had done many tours so he knew how much they could take out of a person. He knew it took a lot of energy to go on stage for two hours and dance and sing and be happy and try to interact with everyone. But he didn't know how (Y/n) did it when she had a muscle disease that made singing painful after a while.

(Y/n) had muscular dystrophy which affected the muscles and it made them weak and deteriorate and it affected her heart too. The type she had was affecting her upper back, neck and face first and it would spread in years to come. Knowing it spread very slowly over time didn't help (Y/n) when the disease had gone for her neck and face first which affected her career. She could still speak properly, she could sing, she could move her head and her neck and jaw perfectly. But the disease made her affected muscles tense and pained because they were growing weak and it meant that singing hurt after a while.

The rushes of adrenaline and the music and crowds didn't help her heart either but (Y/n) couldn't quit. Music was her life and performing was what she loved and was good at, in a few years time it might not be a possibility anymore and so she needed to make the most of it now whilst she still could.

"Are you okay?" Harry tried to keep his tone light as he entered the dressing room behind her before shutting the door so no one else would come in or hover around like the crew sometimes did.

He watched (Y/n) look around for some clothes to change into and he almost felt bad for asking but he couldn't help it. She looked like the pain was worse tonight and he wanted to make sure she was okay and see if there was anything he could do to help. They had been a couple for a few months now and it was very clear to Harry from the beginning that (Y/n) didn't like admitting when her condition was flaring up or starting to get her down. He had to guess when she was trying to hide it and wear her down until she finally talked to him and let him help any way he could.

"I'm okay, just want to get back to the hotel."

"You can say if you're in pain you know. Two and a half hours of that surely can't feel amazing." Harry changed his shirt before his eyes locked with (Y/n) who looked like she wanted to admit how much pain she was in but was deciding against it.

She had to put on a mask when on stage and force herself to smile whenever she felt any kind of pain because none of the public or the fans knew of her condition and she wanted it to stay that way. Plus it wouldn't be very nice if she was frowning or hissing in pain or looked angry like she wanted to leave when she was performing a concert.

"Everything feels like it's on fire and my heart is burning from the adrenaline." (Y/n) saw the look of sadness in Harry's eyes because he couldn't imagine how that must feel. He knew the feeling of his heartbeat pulsing in every vein and artery in his body but that didn't hurt, it just made him feel alive. For (Y/n) it felt like each beat of her heart was becoming harder to do and it felt like she was going to be sick or faint.

(Y/n) held her hand out for Harry so they could go back to the tour bus, the sooner she had her medication and got back to the hotel, the better she would feel.

As they headed back out into the corridor and started to head down to get out into the car park, they felt the crew following them. There was their tour manager, a few bodyguards for precaution and a few other crew who had to tag along. It always felt strange to both singers when they were followed by an entourage wherever they went, it didn't seem right when they had both grown up as part of normal society where bodyguards had never been needed up until they became noticed by the world. Not to say they weren't thankful for the crew, it was just strange, even now after years of going through these tours.

When they got down to the last corridor that led out into the car park, Harry turned to look at (Y/n) when she started to slow down

"What's wrong?" Harry leaned his head closer to her own so he could whisper the words in her ear without anyone else listening in but he felt his anxiety growing when (Y/n) looked like she was about to pass out or fall asleep standing up.

A sudden flurry of white spots danced across (Y/n)'s vision when she felt her heart shuddering in her chest, a familiar feeling signalling that the impulses in her heart weren't working properly. Her body gave way for a split second as her mind felt like it had some sort of glitch, as if she was about to pass out but stopped herself at the last second.

Her knees caved in and her head was suddenly too heavy for her to hold up causing her head to snap back which felt like her neck had broken when the muscles started to scream. Her breathing stuttered as a burst of agony flooded through her whole body.

Turning his head so quickly he almost got whiplash, Harry stumbled to a stop when he felt (Y/n) crumble beside him. He watched as her head fell back and her eyes fluttered like she had blacked out for only one second. Harry let go of her hand so he could wrap his arms around her to stop her from falling to the ground. (Y/n) managed to move her shaking hands to grab onto Harry's arms for support and she tried to force her knees to straighten out when Harry gently pulled her up so she was standing again.

He took most of her weight before moving her backwards until she was leaning up against the wall. He turned her head so she was looking up at him, noticing it took her a few seconds to focus her eyes on him.

"(Y/n), you with me?" His tone was concerned yet sweet like it was dipped in honey. He leaned his head down a little due to the height difference so he could look at her properly, brushing his thumb across her cheek as she managed to nod, lips twitching from the pain the movement caused in her neck.

"J-just my heart." She responded, breathing through the words as Harry watched her come back to Earth rather quickly. In any other situation Harry would have commented on how she spoke like that was a normal thing, but then again this was sort of a normal occurrence for her.

Harry knew he needed to get her back on the tour bus so she could get her meds and get her back to the hotel quickly.

"Do you think you can walk, we need to get you to the bus."

(Y/n) took a deep breath before nodding and she pressed her head into Harry's shoulder when he took her weight again, pulling her from the wall and into his chest. His arm secured around her waist keeping her glued to his side as he guided her down the corridor with everyone else following behind, unsure what was happening.

Harry opened the door in front of them to get them outside, noticing some of the production crew were already outside and waiting nearby or already on the tour bus. They all looked over at the pair with rather confusing looks when they noticed how unwell (Y/n) looked. Harry glanced wearily at the crowds that were beginning to flood around them outside, clearly wanting an autograph or to have a chance to meet them both which clearly wasn't going to be an option tonight. He felt a surge of relief when the crew seemed to understand something was wrong and they made sure there was a barrier so none of the fans could get close to the tour bus.

It didn't take them long to get to the tour bus and after taking it slow up the steps to get inside, Harry kept his arms tightly around (Y/n) as he guided her down the bus. The crew on the bus started to crowd around them, asking if they needed anything or what was wrong and it made Harry want to snap. Surely they knew (Y/n) wasn't very well but Harry and the crew were the only ones who knew of (Y/n)'s condition so it wasn't as if they hadn't seen her in a similar state to this before.

"It's alright, let's just get back to the hotel." Harry stated, making sure to keep any annoyance out of his voice because he didn't want to be rude.

He sat down with (Y/n) at the seats at the very back of the bus, watching with sad eyes when she started to subtally shake which made him shake when she wrapped her arms around him like she was trying to disappear.

Their eyes met when he held her hands and moved them to rest in her lap, his eyes telling her that it was alright as he kissed her temple. Harry's eyes told everyone else on the bus to leave (Y/n) alone and to stop pestering her with their persistent questions of 'are you alright' and 'what can I do'. He knew what he was doing and them fussing around her wasn't going to make things better because they weren't doing anything to help, they were only making her anxious and overwhelmed.

He watched (Y/n) in slight pain as she curled up in the seat against the window, tears silently falling down her face as she watched where Harry was going.

The first time Harry had witnessed (Y/n) be in pain from her irregular heartbeats or when she was in pain from her tense, sore muscles he didn't know what to do to help. But now he had come to know which medications she was on and what they did and he tried to figure out different methods and things to do that could help alleviate her symptoms and her pain.

Walking over to the seats that held all of the bags, Harry rummaged around, grabbing the small black bag with the rough exterior material that scratched at the skin. He unzipped it and grabbed one of the many medication bottles before he grabbed a bottle of water and an ice pack from the cooling bag beside him.

Harry sat back down beside (Y/n) and placed the bottled water on the table before he undid the medication bottle and took out two beta-blockers which would help calm down (Y/n)'s heart impulses and muscles. (Y/n) gratefully took the tablets from him and took them with a large gulp of water before she wiped at her eyes with her sleeve to rid her face of the tears she had started to shed.

(Y/n)'s eyes darted up to look at Harry when she felt a sudden shock of cold on her neck. He had his right arm resting o the back of the seat they were leaning against as his left hand was holding the ice pack to her neck to try and calm down the tense muscle. It was a ritual for (Y/n) to grab an ice pack after every show and sit with it plastered to her neck for the ride back to whatever hotel they were staying at. She hardly went anywhere without the cooling pack that was a medication in itself to relieve the pain she always seemed to be getting now as medication simply wasn't doing enough for her weakened muscles.

Leaning over (Y/n) rested her head on Harry's chest just under his chin, relaxing against him when he said nothing in protest against her actions. His hand keeping the ice pack pressed to her neck as he pressed his lips to the top of her head.

Neither of them could wait until they got back to the hotel and got some peace and quiet.