#thank you again for the attack its super neat!

[toxic3mmy]

hiiii ive been rlly obsessed with pjo lately, and this idea's been stuck in my head sooo

a pjo au where reader is a child of eros, and accidentally shoots q with one of the love arrows while practicing archery?? and then he gets a puppy crush and starts following reader around, just a cute romcom :)

woah, this idea sounds awesome! thanks so much for the request babe!! i’ll try my best to satisfy your pjo obsession hehehe

(also, i tweaked some junk like powers of the children of zeus and stuff just to make it easier, JUST PRETEND ITS CORRECT PLZ)

(thinking of adding original art to this IDK GIMME TIME)

prompt: you’re practicing archery and shoot alex, child of apollo, with a love arrow which leads to an accidental crush on you

no warnings! super cute and fluffy and romcom!!

________________________________________

part one ~

[listen at each star *]

it was a quiet spring morning. you were up and ready for your day and you decided that it would be perfect weather to practice your archery skills. you collected your materials and head off to your usual practice area.

you spruce up your target on the beautiful willow tree trunk in front of you and you begin.

you put your things out on your practice table in a neat manner. you play some of your “weird” non mythological music and begin.

**

you relax completely, hold up your bow and with a deep breath in, you let go.

plonk

“god.. that’s just terrible” you mumble to yourself as you spot the arrow almost a foot away from the practice board.

you draw back again and let go.

plonk

“no wonder i need the damn practice” you’re a bit annoyed seeing the arrow land in the grass at the base of the tree but continue to practice.

you draw back again, feeling a slight tingly vibration in your fingertips, and you knew this was a good sign. you were going to hit it right on the bullseye. the moment you begin to exhale, your music makes an odd doppler effect-like sound and it freaks you out a bit. you still absentmindedly let go of the arrow but don’t see where it landed.

“puta madre!”

a blood curdling shriek escapes you. you frantically try to hide from whoever it was that yelled.

a boy with dark hair came up from behind the willow tree and as soon as your eyes met, he holds both his hands up in defeat.

“don’t shoot, please!”

“dude, what the fuck are you doing here?! i almost had a heart attack! ew what’s wrong with your skin?” you made a face of disgust at him

“huh? look, i was just trying to find where that music was coming from and you shot me! like seriously, can you help me get this stupid arrow out of my ass?! god it’s like really deep in my butt meat”

“okay firstly, ew. secondly, ew.”

“im serious, can you give me a hand?” he pleaded, and as you approached him you noticed way too many things at once;

one: his skin was seriously looking freaky

two: he was a child of apollo, a sworn enemy of your eros parents

three: the arrow was really deep in his buttcheek

four: ….

“oh fuck me”

his skin was literally glowing. like… with love and junk.

you look down at the arrow you just removed from him and… oh no, how?!

you shot him with a love arrow. that’s just your luck, huh?

“hey… come here often sweetheart?” he smirked and you seriously had to choke down vomit

“really, that’s what you call flirting? you are such a little virgin boy”

“maybe you can change that” he holds your hand in his and pulls you in closer “maybe you want to put something else in my ass tonight besides that arrow” he smirked once again

you couldn’t believe the words he was saying to you.

you began laughing uncontrollably at his poor attempts at being suave and hot. you bent over laughing, you laughed so hard your abdomen was in absolute pain.

“see? i knew you’d come around, sexy lady” he pulled you up to be chest to chest with him

you quickly pushed him off and dried your tears from laughing so much.

“shut up dude, what even is your name? never mind, we need to get you a cure because i am definitely not going to deal with you and this… love crush thing” you began to collect your things in your backpack and you reached for the same arrow the raven haired menace did, as he was trying to help you.

“my name is alex… but you definitely have permission to call me papi” he said as your touching hands were intertwined in his and you quickly yanked your hand away

“blegh! you seriously need help, you creep! come on, we don’t have time to waste! our parents will absolutely kill us if they see us together” you yanked his arm to follow you and your head snapped at him as you heard a lewd moan come from alex.

“oh yeah, i love it when you’re rough baby” he moaned even louder and you plonked him in the head.

rolling your eyes, you continued to drag him to the only person who could help you out with no hesitation.

it took about fifteen agonizing minutes of walking to your friend thalia’s home as alex would not stop flirting with you and it wouldn’t be that bad of an issue but the dude had absolutely no game so it was just a lot of secondhand embarrassment you were dealing with.

you knocked on thalia’s door and prayed she was in.

thankfully, she opened the door a second later with a sweet smile,

“oh y/n! what a lovely surprise and… um excuse me what the actual frick is going on here??”

you pulled alex in and closed her door hurriedly.

“look man, i was practicing my archery right?”

“uh huh…” thalia replied

“because i simply suck balls at it right??”

“no you don’t darling! you’re a natural beauty and not to mention a talented one at that!” alex sighed, admiring you and inch from your face.

you shoved away his big head with your hand, and continued,

“and well… I SHOT THIS DUMBASS WITH A LOVE ARROW! PLEASE GIVE ME SOME KIND OF POTION THINGY TO FIX IT, PLEASE!” you beg thalia

“oh no! my honey is in distress! fear not, sweet maiden—”

thalia blows a green dust in his face and alex plops down on the ground like a sack of potatoes and he’s snoring away immediately.

“oh my god, thank you so so much! you don’t understand, he was literally like moaning all the way here and he calls that flirting?! he—”

“okay girl, do you need some eepy dust too?? just take a deep breath okay?”

you nod and calm down

“okay, as much as i know you need my help and as much as i want to help you, i can’t. we literally just ran out of the potion for that yesterday and i can’t make any new batches because im missing the main ingredient”

“well that’s okay! tell me where to get it and i’ll go right now and we can fix this whole mess and get rid of the buffoon!”

“no y/n, you don’t understand… the ingredient we need isn’t something you can just go get…”

you looked at her with a really confused face

“the ingredient is uh… spider legs, really weird i know! but you know the all mighty zeus, my pops, yeah he’s not as big and bad as he seems. he’s actually terrified of spiders so he banned them here in our world and i don’t get any spiders in stock until christmas because that’s the only time i can get my guy out here and… yeah”

“are you serious? god damn your dad and his arachnophobia..” i pinch the bridge of my nose in frustration

“yeah well, it’s either wait eight months for this potion or… get your father to undo the love spell”

i sigh and put my head down in my hands, feeling really defeated. what the hell do i do now?

“well… on the bright side, that dust i used on him will have some good effects when used alongside a love spell” thalia offers and you perk up

“wait really?? is he going to stop being so creepy with me?”

“well, maybe? it differs from person to person. but i do know that it most likely will make him act more in tune with his regular personality when he’s into someone, if that helps?” she smiled nervously

“let’s just hope he stops moaning every time i touch him” i say hopefully

“so.. you should probably try telling your dad. it was all a huge accident and i don’t think he’s going to be too upset. yeah he’ll probably give you the old ‘you need to be more responsible’ speech thing but im sure he’ll help you… unless he punishes you by not helping” thalia laughs deviously at the idea

“well thanks anyways, man. also, how long til he wakes up?” you ask, pointing at alex on the floor

“oh, one sec” thalia moves closer to him and kicks him in the balls

alex immediately shoots his eyes open and groans in pain

you look at thalia and the two of you laugh together.

thalia hands alex a pain reliever lollipop as a parting gift and you say your goodbyes to one another.

now it’s just you and alex.. and you were nervous about the way he was going to act with you.

“hey.. i uh, im really sorry about the way i was acting earlier. i seriously was acting super virgin-esque huh? i kinda heard everything you guys were saying even though i was asleep and yeah… but hey, at least now i’m not moaning at you like a harlot right now?” he laughed softly

“that’s so embarrassing that you heard us… but hey, at least you’re somewhat normal again?” you asked and offered him a smile

“i uh.. i never even asked for your name”

“oh, its y/n” you reply in a quiet voice

“that’s a really beautiful name… did i ever mention what my powers were?”

“no actually, you didn’t” you shook your head

“well, can i borrow your bow?” he asks sheepishly

you hesitantly nod and hand him your bow and a normal arrow

he places the arrow in its rightful position and comes up behind you. he’s still holding onto it as he places it in your hands. his arms are completely around you and his head is right next to yours.

“okay, relax. now, you see that small red flag thing on the tree over there? imagine the arrow landing right in the middle. take a deep breath” his hands were atop yours as he pulled the bow back and he whispered almost seductively,

“let go”

you both let the arrow go and it shoots right where you imagined it to. you gulped at how close he was to you. he smelled of pine and cinnamon. it was wonderful..

“you just needed a little push.. you did great y/n” he said in a low voice, still holding onto your hands on the bow

why did you want to lean in and kiss him?

wait, what?!

you immediately pulled away, putting as much space between the two of you as possible.

“y-yeah.. um thank you alex. should we keep going now?” you ask, unable to make eye contact with him

“whatever you’d like to do y/n. i’m honestly just enjoying your presence right now. it almost feels like it’s just you and me here, doesn’t it?”

you didnt know what to say. you agreed completely. you wanted nothing more than to waste your time with alex and his handsome smile and his sweet way with words and—

“y/n? can i show you my other power?” her broke the scary thoughts you were having

“sure”

**

alex began to sing the same song in was listening to earlier, without missing a single beat. how did he even know this song?

he took your hand and sung his heart out to you. you felt a swarm of butterflies flutter at the pit of your stomach. it feels like you were the one that got a love arrow stuck in your butt.

“your voice is beautiful… how do you know that song?” you asked, continuing to walk alongside alex

“well, i heard it a long time ago. sometimes i can hear it in my dreams, too. it’s not music we can listen to here, it’s mortal music i think. how do you know it?” he asked curiously

“i’ve always had an interest in mortal music.. i was actually playing that song this morning when the whole incident happened, i think you may have interfered with the sound waves when you were trying to find where it was coming from”

“that’s right… i guess this is our song then, huh?” he stated, grabbing me gently by the arm as we stopped in our tracks

“yeah, i guess so” your face was gently raised up by alex’s fingertips, forcing you to look into his entrancing brown eyes

“y/n, are you sure you’re not a siren?” alex whispered, his lips practically touching your lips

“w-what?..”

“it feels like you’re luring me to my sweet demise.. and what’s a death sentence without me being given a last meal? please, let me taste your lips before you take my soul away. it would make me feel oh so complete in this bittersweet end” he claimed proudly

with a flutter of your eyes, you shut them softly and gently press your lips against his

you feel his arms wrap around you in a tight but gentle way, and you reciprocated by holding his torso tightly

your hands grip his shirt tightly in fists as alex deepens the kiss, a small whimper leaving his soon to be bruised lips

alex pulls away and says softly,

“i can die a happy man now, y/n”

you had no idea what just happened or how it happened or even why you let it happen???

there was just something about him that lured you in. you wanted to take him in in every way possible, because to consume him would mean to be one.

god, what the hell were you even thinking?

[TO BE CONTINUED]

[crusherthedoctor]

Top 5 Sonic Final bosses? :)

This is counting "regular" final bosses as well, in the case of those that have a true final boss. Spoiler though: they're all Eggman. :P I swear this wasn't on purpose, it's just that the other villains who make up a final boss often tend to be underwhelming for one reason or another.

5. Nega-Wisp Armor - It may be a bit on the easy side, but since Colours marked the first 3D title where Eggman was the uncontested final boss from all angles, it holds a lot of significance to me as a result. That aside, it's also cool that Eggman gets to use the Wisps against you... even takes the announcer with him. >:|

4. Egg Diablo - I think I've become this boss fight's biggest stan at this point lol. I get why some parts might piss players off, but for the most part, I genuinely enjoy how challenging this one is. Its design provides a neat shogun spin on the Death Egg Robot template, it has a lot in common with the Great Eggman Robo (see below), and I love how Eggman segues into phase 2 by cockblocking your victory.

3. Egg Viper - One of the most famous examples here. Killer design, legendary meme, and an ending that always gets me hyped. I'm not a Michael Bay, but I love that explosion so much.

2. Egg Wizard - A very unique and underrated one. Thanks to the Jeweled Scepter, Eggman (and Nega, but fuck him) shows off a selection of unconventional magic-based attacks. The fight itself is quite fun too.

1. The Death Egg/Doomsday finale - I consider the endgame of S3&K to be one of the best in the series, largely because of how well it incorporates Eggman's absolute refusal to give up. There are gods who get Big Oof'd after one fight, meanwhile this man keeps going again and again. And all this after the rest of S3&K, which of course had many other moments where the doctor gave his 110%.

Honorable mentions: The original Death Egg Robot cause of how iconic it is, SA1 Egg Walker cause of the significance it has for Tails and Eggman's own demeanour in the cutscene leading up to it, Perfect Chaos for being probably the least shit Super Sonic boss in a 3D installment, the Egg Shrimp in Advance 2 for what it says about Eggman and Sonic's characters with how quick they are to kidnap and save a random woman respectively, Emerl in Battle cause of the emotions surrounding it, Egg Salamander in Rush cause ~wrapped in black, wrapped in black~, Alf-Layla-wa-Layla cause Sonic gets to beat the shit out of Erazor "Domestic Abuser" Djinn, the Mega Death Egg Robot in Forces cause of the genius of Eggman storing a second mech inside the first one, and finally - despite its, er, complications - the Black Dragon in Superstars, cause seeing Sonic's friends help him out during it is extremely appreciated by me after years of them standing around like cheerleaders whenever it's final boss time.

[mecha-omega]

Had to think about this one for a while, 2 1/2 weeks max.

Many games go under the radar from many fans and companies. Many just become forgotten. But thanks to a friend, I’ve experienced a game that I’ve never thought I would enjoy fully. That game is Panzer Dragoon Saga, a game released on the Sega Saturn in 1998. It had a rough development cycle, being made while the Sega Saturn and Sega themselves were spiraling down due to the commercial failure of the Saturn. But thanks to people on the internet, the Sega Saturns Emulation is fully stable as the games rom can be found online.

Panzer Dragoon Saga starts at a dig site in the mountains, while mercenaries are guarding the area. In it they find a Girl surrounded by stone, but not long after they get attacked by their employers while they all get picked off one by one. All but one are alive, a young adult named Edge, after being shot off a cliff, Edge is awoken in ruins surrounded by gray ancient plates. He gets attacked by creatures of a by-gone age but a strange dragon saved you as you escape the ruins, venturing out to get your revenge and save the girl they took.

Right of the bat, you go straight into the gameplay, clean and simple. The only things you have to focus on is your dragon’s HP, SP, and any Status effects it has. There is no equipment like armor and the like, just whatever attachments Edge’s gun you’d like to put on it. To attack you have to use an action gauge (3 bars) to attack with your gun or the dragons’ many attacks. At one point in the game you will have access to many moves that does different kinds of effect to buffing, debuffing, Healing, AOE attacks, Shields, ect. At a certain point in the game the Dragon will be able to transform into 4 other forms, Attack, Agility, Spiritual, and Defense, each form can be chosen by via a slider so you can go either a balance Dragon or go one sided with your dragon.

There are items & intractable objects in the world of PDS so it’s best to explore as much as you can. Honestly it’s recommended due to this games length, it’s only 12 hours long minimum, I’ve personally hit 13 hours due to me just wondering around areas & looking for certain items that can help me with later fights. I recommend looking for items called “D Units”, there are 12 of them in total. I won’t say what they do but it’s a neat bonus for finding them all.

The story and look of Panzer Dragoon Saga are amazing especially its world. The Sega Saturns from what I heard wasn’t the best with 3D compared to N64 & PSX1, but ultimately these environments were amazing to look at. Nothing honestly compared to other games around the time, the detail in certain landscapes were impressive, Granted there are some pop in but it might just has to due to the emulation since it isn’t running on OG hardware. Final Fantasy never did 3D fully mainline till FFX, and Xenogears only did 3D for the environments rather than the character models. PDS does both and it’s insane how a console that can’t do 3D very well processes all of what’s going on screen. Yah, other games like MGS1 & Mario 64 are full 3D but idk for this game it feels different.

The Story isn’t the most ground breaking I’ve witnessed but it’s has some twists that I’ve would’ve not predicted. I won’t say what they were but there were moments where my jaw dropped and I just sat there like “DAWG WHAT!?” Till I went back to processing what I’ve seen. With the story being so short, it’s plot is way more focused than other games after it’s released, which is super refreshing in certain cases. For Edge and Azel being the main characters, they are pretty endearing, they aren’t to crazy as characters but their interactions all the way up to the end of the game fits the game’s end with a nice bow.

Overall, Panzer Dragoon Saga became one of my favorite games of all time. I’ve never had an experience quite like it, but sadly I don’t believe we’ll have something quite like it again. After it’s release, Sega was already setting its sights on the Dreamcast as their financial situation gets worse. While PDS isn’t the sole reason for it, it was non the less not very favorable sales wise. While it’s JP version only produced 100K copies, its US versions only produced 25k and worse its EU version? Only 1,000 copies making it extremely rare in said region. It can sit around for 1,000$ to 2,000$ minimum compleat as parts of it go for 200$ to 300$ and that’s only for the US. Due to the restructuring Sega was doing they disbanded Team Andromeda and folded them into Smilebit. Thankfully the game did get a sequel in the form of Panzer Dragoon Orta, taking place after PDS.

If you want to play the game in full I highly recommend getting an emulator for it (Mainly Retro Arc) since Saturn emulation has been smoother the past few years, there is a guild on the Wiki iirc. And if you are one of the few that are waiting for it to come to current Gen home consoles, tough shit. We don’t know the full story but due to the restructuring for the Dreamcast release and after the company restructured again after the Dreamcast died and moved onto game making. The source code is most likely lost or destroyed since there has been no attempts to rerelease it in some shape or form.

With all said and done, with it being one of my favorite games I’ve played this year, I give it unironically a 9.5/10 to a 10/10. I don’t think I’ll have the same experience that I had with this game with any other game moving forwards, but I’m glad to say that this game found a home in my head and heart. And I’ll fight for it whenever Sega tries to remake it or remaster it if they ever find the source code or have another studio help them create it from the ground up.

Ty Team Amdromeda and Sega for creating such an amazing experience…

[inventors-fair]

Satisfied and Satisfactory: Runners-up! ~

Our runners-up this week are @just--a--penguin, @little-red-rabbit, and @snugz!

@just--a--penguin — Kiora’s Daring

Minor Aftermath spoilers, I guess, but it doesn’t super matter. Unless we aren’t talking about that. First order of business is that this card’s super well balanced and a great rare to throw down. On turn four, your previous creatures can perchance get some evasive action in, especially if you have an awesome seafarer like a Welkin Tern or even a little trampler. The ramp is awesome and the draw is awesome. Turn eight, if you’ve got all your drops, you can just put this down and basically get a free 8/8 for four mana but with the time investment already put in. Not gonna lie: as crazy as that it, I really like how you balanced that!

The first big edit is the trigger wording. “At the beginning of combat on your turn, choose target creature you control. Until end of turn, it gains...” should be the proper wording, IMO, because you want the end of the quoted ability to have a period. That’s the precedent for all other abilities worded like this, although none quite as specific as this one for precedent, unfortunately. The second small non-edit is just that this card’s good for its mechanics and I do want to play it. I guess I’m just not excited for the flavor portion? I don’t have to be for this to be a good card, and don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a 100% flavor-only contest. Maybe I just don’t get Kiora as a character. Still, this feels like a card where the mechanics matter more, and I do like them enough for it to be here.

@little-red-rabbit — Desire

And here we are, Incarnation 2: Revengeance! I’ll be honest: this card might be a runner-up, but it’s the one I feel with the absolute most daring mechanics. “It comes under your control tapped and attacking.” That’s so cool! And I just had to check the comprehensive rules about it... Darn it. Okay, so, I really thought this was going to work, and unless there’s a comprehensive rules change, 506.4 says that a creature is removed from combat if its controller changes. Does that affect this card? Prrrrrobably. Possibly. I honestly don’t know because there’s never been precedent quite like this before. So you know what, I’m going to change my suggestions and say instead that this card is ambitious enough for a potential comprehensive rules change if an effect like this got printed!

Wow. This rarely happens, and it’s super cool. Thanks for making me delve a little into rules effects! So: how would we make this work with the CompRules as it stands? Perhaps make it a tap ability, a beginning of combat trigger, or even a pie-bending exile-return effect? There are a few ways to go about it. Fading is an interesting choice, but it makes sense here. I don’t know if we’ll see fading again in Standard, but as a resource, I would check out Mark Rosewater’s “Storm Scale” articles. I’m not sure where Fading stands, heh.

Just for polish, here are a couple minor edits:

You gave this card fading 2, but put “3” in the reminder text. Whoops! Things get switched in editing, fair enough.

I believe this should be “Whenever Desire attacks,” not “when,” since it can happen repeatedly.

Flavor text is decent! I think you can take away the quotes, take out the “c” in “satisfied,” and switch “it’s” to “its.” Spelling aside, it reads really well, actually.

@snugz — Mourning Mage

And here we are back to the grimdark. Well, ish! What I really like about the flavor angle here is the fact that the flavor text emphasizes how this character is channeling their mourning, how we embark upon our passions, not necessarily through logic, but through the energy of grief. Which is...pretty messed up, actually. I like it. The quote should probably be in quotation marks, being a quote. Really neat overall, though, and I guess they found a cure based on that activated ability!

Mechanics-wise, yeah, this card’s rad as hell. I think that having kicker and investigate as two potentially major themes (or at least two themes with some overlap) is asking a bit, unless you want to imply that investigation is minor, as it was in something like the most recent Innistrad block. Great wording on that first ability, BTW; DMU’s pseudomultikicker was really fun and I’m curious about how it would come back here. Backwards compatibility is important. Regardless, clue generation can come about in a few ways, and as a rare midrangey kind of card, I like it a lot! You’ve got a build-around-me rare that someone’s probably gonna have fun with and a flavored ambition to top it off. Still asking a lot of implications, but I’m sure it would play fine.

I'm writing this early enough to need food before doing more commentary, but it's being written! See y'all soon.

@abelzumi

[ruiniel]

Can I request a Carmilla x Lisa drabble or one shot? Maybe something where Lisa knocks on the door of Carmilla’s castle instead of Draculas?

Hey anon? How does it feel walking around with such an intergalactic super-brain? Loved this, thank you so much for indulging this ship with me. Had massive fun exploring this prompt (technically falls under char/char, though this is pre-rel).

As usual a oneshot, unless I get plot bunnies for more

Edit: Two parts!

Frost

Fandom: Castlevania series (2017-2021)

Characters: Lisa Tepes, Carmilla of Styria

Count: 1k

Relationship: Lisa Tepes/Carmilla of Styria (pre-rel)

Rating: G

TW: alternate universe, first meetings, sapphic, gothic, wlw

Also on ao3

Summary:

A different first encounter I suppose

I.

She ascends the hardened path on trembling feet, her shawl drawn over her cheeks and lips against the frost. It bites into her skin with every struggling step like thousands of hungry little ice mouths. She’s at the end of her tether. Just a few more steps, a few more. Soon, she’ll stand before the gates.

The castle looms above her like the vision of a winter tale, its red spires sprinkled with cold moonlight that glides off ice and snow. Finally, atop the final stair, Lisa retrieves her dagger, and beats upon the wide doors. 

Her rapping sounds hollow, echoing through the ribcage of the palace. Nature seems asleep or else frozen in time, and there is nothing but the cold white mountains behind her and the black skies above.

Lisa strikes the gates again, but when she raises her hand, a heaviness encumbers her movement. A grip, on her shoulder; she’s spun around, and before she can use her dagger, her world shifts and turns, and with a flash of silver her eyesight sways as cold metal digs into her flesh. 

She sees… crimson. Blinking wearily, Lisa tries to regain herself and determine the basics of her surroundings: one, she is reclined. Two, though the chill remains, she is no longer outside. And last, she feels whole, and untethered. The crimson is that of flowing draperies and the night glitters dark beyond them with messy wreaths of stars.

Lisa rises to sit, a hand to her head. She rubs first at her throbbing temple, then the bridge of her nose. She’s laid on a richly covered couch, and upon initial glance finds the furnishings of a study or a living room of sorts. The tallest ceiling she had ever seen is sustained by polished columns, and walls docked with smooth tomes of knowledge. A childish part of her, the part that has no lingering concerns about having been immobilized and brought here, can’t but feel the itch to peel one of those books off a shelf and see for herself. But, manners. “… is there anyone here?” Lisa asks instead, her voice high-strung with disuse.

“There is,” a smooth voice startles her. 

Lisa swivels around, towards a tall arch, beneath which a woman stands; a young woman, svelte and silver-haired, wearing a vaporous dark robe that clings to her body. Weaves of gold snake up her fair arms, and her eyes are bright like moonlit ice.

Lisa takes in this neat, festooned appearance at this nightly hour, for a moment wondering if she’d come upon a celebration. Briefly, she regards her own worn shoes and dusty cape; her hand reaches self-consciously, brushing through her windswept hair. “Well met,” Lisa does her best to be civil, “I’ve… were you the one to bring me up here?” 

“No, that was one of the guards. Your appearance was quite the surprise to them.” She crosses her arms, rests her cheek in one palm. “At first they thought we were being attacked,” she smirks, and it’s sharp, cruel, almost. Lisa’s not entirely sure she likes it. 

She watches the woman’s elegant steps as she then walks towards the shelves and long, thin fingers seek like spider legs before drawing a book from its place.

It doesn’t look like it, but this feels like no chance encounter; the strangeness at the back of her mind tells her she’s being watched. “I am Lisa, from Lupu village, leagues away. I’ve been seeking this place. Or, I think it is this place,” she brings a finger to her chin. Should have sought for more relevant information, in hindsight.

“Carmilla,” the stranger brings a slender manicured hand to her chest. Lisa notices her gaze is ice cold, in contrast to the red of her talon-like nails. “Why have you sought our castle?” she asks politely; it sounds like a demand.

Lisa gains her feet. She feels steadier this way. “The stories say the man who lives here possesses secret knowledge.” 

Carmilla glances up from the book cover. “Really.”

“Yes,” Lisa adds, caught by the unearthly gleam to those eyes. But this is what she’s here for. And she is not leaving the way she came. “May I… is he here? Could I see him?”

“You presume,” Carmilla opens the tome, pages through it, “that you’ve come all this way to ask for something of a stranger while offering nothing in return, and that it shall be given to you, because… you wish it?” She raises a skeptical eyebrow.

Lisa bites down on her lip. “No… well. But… but my goal is above me! I want to help people.”

Carmilla tilts her head, as though she were reading a curious thing just then. “... Help.” She knows how to hold a presence, Lisa will give her that. At first, the woman thought this could be a highly ranked aide, but now doubt creeps upon the notion.

Might as well try? “I want to be a doctor. I want to learn.”

“To learn? How to help humans live longer?”

Lisa narrows her eyes. “If you summon your lord, I can tell him all and more.” Certain her motives are being assessed, she is still weary enough to lose this game.

Carmilla leans against the tall desk, her glass beauty an unreadable mask. The tome snaps shut in her hand. She smiles. “Yes, of course. Wait here, Lisa from Lupu…” she says, a bizarre quiver to her red-lipped smile. 

“Lady Carmilla, I know how this must look.” Lisa shakes her head. “I show up in the middle of the night, intruding and crudely pounding on the entrance of your home with a knife… I only…” she sighs. “I have searched long for a possibility to learn, for someone willing to teach me. I only want to become better.” 

Carmilla had gone around the desk, produced a quill and a piece of parchment, scribbling something. She pauses. “Better than whom?”

The question seems genuine, from what Lisa can tell. For the first time, she has the feeling the other regards her with something other than polite contempt. “... than… myself? Better than before.”

A few seconds pass before the stranger’s robes swish around her body with movement. “I will relay your words in full,” Carmilla announces, already walking away.

“Thank you,” Lisa adds in haste, watching her leave, relieved at having an understanding.

Carmilla steps into the corridor, glancing at the guards posted on each side of the heavy white doors. “You’re welcome,” she replies as an afterthought, nodding subtly at one before departing with a grin on her face. 

Part II

[sutzrainbow]

I posted 720 times in 2022

34 posts created (5%)

686 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

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@cipheramnesia

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I tagged 683 of my posts in 2022

Only 5% of my posts had no tags

#oddworld - 118 posts

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#accurate - 38 posts

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Longest Tag: 139 characters

#also got a ton of cannula marks from that time i was in hospital with dka and had half a dozen bags of medication and fluid hooked up to me

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

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15 notes - Posted January 15, 2022

#4

I saw Sonic 2!

I LOVED IT!! IT WAS SO MUCH FUN!

While I don’t think it’s quite as good as the first one, I still really enjoyed myself! I still think this movie was made by people who genuinely love Sonic, loved hiding little details and references for us fans to find, and tried to make this crackerjack franchise work while still embracing its silliness. Here are my thoughts! (Spoilers under the cut)

I LOVED HOW KNUCKLES WAS WRITTEN. Gullible and not the brightest, but still super-intimidating and powerful. 

Idris Elba as Knuckles was utterly perfect. I am so pleased at long last he has a black voice actor (for those who don’t know, Knuckles was originally meant to be Jamaican. Yes, really.) Hope the guy comes back.

“Oh. They are stairs.” “I have honorably beaten you at this base of ball!” Fucking hilarious. I <3 you, Knuckles.

I love how dirty Sonic and co. get when they’re hurt. The game characters don’t do that, but it’s a fun realistic touch.

I like Tom and Maddie and was glad to see them again. They blow characters like Chris out of the water.

“Let’s go get our kid.” Thank you, Maddie.

Jim Carrey was having the time of his life and I loved it.

They leaned HARD into the shipping with Stone and I loved that too. But Stone doesn’t do very much, which is a shame.

I also love this movie thing where they make the Chaos Animals’ eyes light up and then it spreads to the rest of them when they use their powers. I’m glad it’s something they all do, it’s a fun little characteristic.

The idea of the Chaos Emeralds being fused into the Master Emerald was a neat take on it. In the games and most continuity, the Master Emerald is separate from the Chaos Emeralds. Like, it can control them, but it’s its own unique entity as well.

They played around with the Chaos Emeralds turning thoughts into reality instead of just energy, which was neat. Bit like Green Lantern. Given how things played out in the last movie, I thought that an Emerald was going to turn out to be hidden inside Sonic, or that he was going to turn out to be a living Chaos Emerald, but that wasn’t what happened.

The idea of a human being able to manipulate Chaos power is incredibly unsettling. In a lot of continuities they either are not affected at all, or it kills them. I liked the vocal effect they used with Robotnik absorbing the Emerald’s power.

Sonic and Tails’ bond, as always, is super sweet. I love how they set up the team and basically the rest of the series by the end of the movie.

They address Sonic’s inability to swim, referenced the whole air bubbles thing - but I don’t think I heard the drowning music. Maybe an orchestral version of that would be too close to Jaws.

They worked Longclaw back into the plot (though she doesn’t actually show up, it’s a recorded message) in what I thought was a very clever way. Back before they redesigned Sonic for the first movie, he and Longclaw originally got attacked by lizards instead of echidnas like Knuckles. I imagine they just replaced the lizard people in the continuity with the echidnas, but it was still neat to see.

Sonic and co go running around in temples just like in the old games!

They somehow worked the Olive Garden guy back into the plot!? Like, it wasn’t just a blatant product placement??

When they mentioned Guardian Unit of Nations I think my head popped.

Sonic goes Super and they left it out of the trailers, and it was exactly like it plays out in Sonic X. I think I regressed down to 11 years old again, that was so good. Also, his Super form got triggered by him saying ‘I love you guys’. Chills.

Also, the Emeralds in this continuity are TINY. The Master Emerald is about the size of a basket ball, and the Chaos Emeralds about the size of a golf ball.

And yes, the mid-credits sequence. I screamed, legit screamed. “SHADOW IS COMING HELL YEAH.” Like, we see him and he looks amazing. He doesn’t say anything though, so I wonder who they’ll cast to voice him? I liked Jason Griffith’s gruff Shadow OK, but vastly preferred David Humphrey’s almost-gentle tone with a hint of menace, so I hope they go with that.

I didn’t want them to introduce Shadow right away - Tails and Knuckles are the OGs and they must come first - but I always wanted them to tackle Sonic Adventure 2′s story at some point, because it’s so cinematic. It would make a great movie; the plot almost writes itself, especially without having to justify levels or something. I hope they cast a really good, soulful kid to play Maria.

All of that said, I didn’t think it was as good as the first one. It’s only been two years since the first Sonic movie and I think it shows. This one maybe could have done with some more cuts and fine-tuning.

This movie repeats way too much that was done in the first movie - and I’m not talking flashbacks, they’re actually fine. I just mean straight plot beats. We get Sonic messing around at the house, and a sequence in a bar/tavern. This tavern is in Siberia, and there’s no Tom, but that’s all that’s different. I liked watching Sonic and Tails dancing, but it’d been done before. I just wish we’d got right to the temple.

Sonic and Tails crashing Maddie’s sister Rachel’s wedding is really funny, and I loved watching Rachel and Maddie kick butt in all their finery. BUT - then they focus too much on Rachel having some drama with her fiance Randall, who also is an undercover agent, for some reason? There was no need for that. The crashing wedding scene was fine. I was legit looking at my watch and saying, “I didn’t come here to watch wedding drama. I came here to watch Chaos Animals having adventures.” Once that was over, they never showed up again, but jeez. Most of that belonged on the cutting room floor. Randall didn’t even have to be an agent. Just set up GUN and have the girls kicking ass with Tails’ inventions and you’re golden.

I really hope this movie does well, even though it’s not as good as the first, because if it does, we’ll get a part three. And that part three will be Shadow’s movie. And I would love to see Shadow in a movie. Yes please. Yes yes please.

20 notes - Posted April 5, 2022

#3

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28 notes - Posted January 17, 2022

#2

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32 notes - Posted November 21, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

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91 notes - Posted March 1, 2022

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[taestefully-in-luv]

The Island | KTH (One)

Summary: You’re just two strangers waking up in a room on a lonely island where a company in the business of love has placed you. They believe that thanks to their in depth research you two are destined soulmates. What happens when your ‘soulmate’ and you want nothing to do with each other but falling in love is the only way to leave?

Pairing: Taehyung x Female reader

Genre: strangers to lovers, slight enemies to lovers, soulmates au, roommate au, slow burn, fluff, smut, angst, slight crack, and drama.

Word Count: 9.3k

Warnings: swearing

Notes: Alright here is the first ch to my new story! I am super nervous to post this because it is a completely different vibe. But I hope you guys enjoy! Don’t worry, it turns fluffier later:) let me know if you want to be added to the taglist, or send an ask if just want to chat!:)

Taglist: @ggukkieland @monvieesdaebak @707sblog @peacedreamer14

© taestefully-in-luv

Next

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your room is blinding from the soft yet striking sunrise, each beam of light swims through the blinds in piercing waves. The intense glow hits you in your sleepy state, causing you to wake from your glorious slumber. Too bright. You sit up in your bed, attempting to rub away the sleep that crusts your eyes. You begin to slowly open one lid at a time, taking in the neat appearance of your room. Your room looks the same as always—there is a nightstand next to your wooden framed bed, it holds a pale lamp and a photo of mountainous scenery. A dresser sits comfortably in front of you, it is dressed in simple décor and a large mirror. Yup, the same as always. You glance over to your sheer curtained window where the sun very offendedly washes over the room—wait. Hold on a god damn second.

Quickly, you begin to open your eyes just a bit wider—where is your royal purple ottoman? The art that hangs on your walls? Your dresser is brown not black for Christ’s sake! You ball your hand in the sheets…these don’t even feel like your sheets, yours aren’t this silky. This is not your room. Your eyebrows climb to the top of your forehead as you jerk your head around. Where the hell are you? Suddenly, you feel something rustle against your side. No…not something—someone.

Your eyes dart to the right of you, where this someone moves against the sheets. Not just someone. A man. His dark, ruffled hair sticks out between the sheets and pillow below his head. Why is there a man in bed with you? Is it…his bed? Oh god. Immediately, your mind tries to recall the night before. Did you go out and drink too much? Go home with a rando? Super unlike you though. You pull your hair as your mind races.

Sitting up in bed, worry crosses all of your features. You try to face all the possibilities that could maybe end up being your reality. But going out and partying is nowhere in your memories. You begin gnawing on your bottom lip, knowing you stayed home last night. And that you fell asleep in your own bed…alone, you might add. So where the hell are you? And why is there another person? Fear enters the picture now, this is the last place you wanted to go. You know, that horrible, terrible, dark place? The one that says your reality is that some creepy man kidnapped you and plans on doing murder-y type things to you. Yup, that place.

You tug on the end of your hair again, you know, you know, a bad habit. But you can’t help it as anxiety grows deeper within you. Were you really kidnapped? Fuck. You have to think. You’re trying to, at least. But breathing is becoming a chore. Your breaths are quick and sharp like you are on the brink of a panic attack. Shit, maybe you are. You try to eye the room again, taking in its appearance more carefully. You can’t help the shiver that speeds down your spine when you notice how perfect this single bedroom is…it actually almost resembles your guest bedroom at home. Which is creepy in itself. You continue to eye the room curiously, while staying absolutely frozen.

The dresser has more photos of pretty scenery sitting on top, as well as a few small vases that complement the rest of the décor. Anxiety continues to grow within you, shaking you to the core. You hate the way your hands tremble in your lap. You want to do something. You truly do but fuck, you can’t even move a muscle. Your breathing begins to pick up even more. Where are you? Why are you here? Who is this man sleeping so fucking peacefully next to you? Your thoughts are going 100 miles per minute, screaming at you, taunting you, giving you the middle finger.

Before you can think through your many obvious questions and answer them, the man next to you begins to stir in his sleep. You watch with wide eyes as he slowly moves to his back from his side. You stare down at him, too scared to move. Too scared to scream bloody murder. Too scared to do anything. And nothing disappoints you more. That you are nothing but a coward. You look down at your future murderer and wait for him to wake.

Future murderer slowly opens his eyes but he shies away instantly from the beaming sunlight.

“Ahhhh.” He lets go in one long breath, rubbing at his eyes in a sleepy manner. You sit still, your own breath caught in your throat. You want to move but fear has you frozen like an evening in the arctic. The man, or Future Murderer as you seemed to have named him, begins sitting up, stretching his arms out above him and yawns a song of sleep. He finally opens his eyes fully and soaks in the room before him. His head moves around quickly, his expression becoming rather…confused.

“What the fuck?”

Yup, those are his first words. Should have been yours too, if you’re being honest. This guy gets it.

Future Murderer’s facial expression grows bewildered as he looks around the room and when he finally feels your presence, he turns his head your way.

“Uh…” the Murderer narrows his eyes at you, “Hi?”

You don’t even realize the sigh of relief that pushes past your lips, but his confusion seems…genuine. And this allows you to relax your shoulders a little bit. Maybe he is a victim to whatever is going on too? You take in his disheveled appearance; he has brown wavy hair that rests above his brow line, eyes darker than the deepest part of the sea and full pouting lips. You would totally admit he’s attractive as hell but considering the fact you’re trying to convince yourself he isn’t going to murder you and the state you’re in, you’re going to push that thought away.

“Uh, who are you?” His brows knit together as he expectantly waits for an answer.

“No, who are you?” You squint at him. How dare he ask like you aren’t the one totally frazzled here? But somehow it’s comforting that he seems as confused as you are. Mystery man (his new name, since he doesn’t appear to want to murder you) (maybe) raises a single brow at you before answering,

“Taehyung.”

You listen to his name roll off his tongue and absorb it. Taehyung, huh? You hesitate for a second before finally giving your own name.

“y/n.”

Taehyung then, has the audacity to pinch his nose in annoyance. To be fair, it looks like the one he’s annoyed with is himself and not you.

“Look, sorry…” he begins, “If we hooked up last night, I don’t really remember and I—"

Your eyes widen at his words and you begin to frantically shake your head,

“No! We didn’t—we didn’t…”

“Oh?” Taehyung gives you a curious look then has the audacity to scoot several inches away from you. Then you feel his eyes on you, they search you from head to toe. You’re wearing your cat printed PJ shorts and a simple purple t shirt. You admit your hair is probably pretty wild, so you card your fingers through your locks. You start to feel insecure under his gaze as he so shamelessly eyes you.

“I don’t know who you are or where I am…do you know where we are?” you question, looking off to the side.

Taehyung pulls his eyes away from you, his head moving around to look around the room, his arms flailing.

“Does it look like I know where I am?”

You only blink at him and he rolls his eyes, “No, I don’t.” he admits.

Moments of silence pass between the two of you. You don’t know what to say at this point even though you have a million things you would like to say. But you can’t form one, coherent sentence apparently. You don’t know anything. You’re fucking clueless and you hate it. You’re trying to gather your thoughts when you feel Taehyung rise from the bed, startling you like he just committed a crime. God, you are such a coward. What? Do you really think the bed is apparently some super safe place that will protect you from the evils of the world? Taehyung walks toward the dresser and other corners of the room, inspecting it carefully.

“Fucking weird, but nice room, right?” he asks under his breath. Taehyung throws a glance over at you. “You don’t know where you are…I don’t know where I am…we both wake up in a strange room and neither of us have any recollection of how we got here.” Taehyung takes a pause to gather his thoughts. “Have you heard anything? You know, from outside the room? There could be other people.” He waits for you to answer but you stay quiet. Yes, you are on that level of coward.

You stay in the bed, anxiety building up, growing fiercer by the second. While it seems Taehyung’s attention is being stolen by the large window where the sun invites him to come take a peak. He tip toes over to the window, lifting the blinds and exposes something you imagine takes his breath way due to his audible gasp.

“Where…the fuck are we?” he asks breathlessly.

Instead of looking for yourself, you stay seated. But are we surprised? You study Taehyung’s expressions, watching for his reactions. His face falls into one of awe but after only a few moments in settles back into confusion. He reaches for the bottom of the window sill and lifts upwards, opening the window and releasing the sound of…is that waves? You continue to observe him, too afraid to see for yourself. He stands there for several long moments before turning your way and he clears his throat.

“I—I don’t…I don’t know where we are, like, really.” He takes a hesitant step towards the bed. “But something tells me neither of us are from here.”

You need a minute. Yeah, you need a minute to process his words. Because what the fuck does he mean by that? You aren’t ‘from here’? Are you on another planet or some shit? This man needs to work on his wording, for Christ’s sake. You feel your hand move just the slightest. Then your other hand. Your toes curl in and out. Seems you aren’t so frozen anymore. Things are, yes things as in waking up with a total stranger and him saying you are in an unknown place, are starting to wake you up. You’re so ashamed your solution to all of this was to stay seated in bed…but for some reason a rushing sensation of bravery washes over you.

You rise from the sheets and step one foot on to the floor. It’s not lava. So you step down with both feet and make your way over to Taehyung. You stop in front of him, tilting your head up since he has several inches over you—but nothing too intimidating, you decide. His eyes find yours and you lock eyes for a few moments. Both of you trying to search the other for answers. You break contact to face the window and wow. Your eyes animatedly widen at the sight. Palm trees and water for miles and miles it seems. No other buildings or sign of life. An island? But not the kind of island where this room is a part of some fancy resort, no, not that kind. Instead the kind where a plane crashes and a group of people have to survive.

You blink down at your new reality. First of all, you live nowhere near an island, so there’s that. You feel the anxiety and frustrations begin to surface again and you can’t help that your eyes begin to gloss over. You snap your head back to get a look at your fellow victim and he looks just as lost as you feel.

“We need to find out what’s going on.” Taehyung takes a deep breath, lifting his head up. He locks his eyes with yours again but you break contact to look at your feet.

“We don’t know anything…would if it’s not safe?” you quietly try to reason.

“Exactly, we don’t know anything and that’s a problem. You don’t expect us to stay in this room forever, do you?”

He has a point and you know it. You want to follow him out of this room but your feet seem to be glued to the floor.

“Well, no. But—”

“Didn’t think so.” He turns away from you, his body shuffling towards the bedrooms door but before he can become out of reach your hand flies to his shirt sleeve, tugging it softly.

“Wait! Just hold on—” Your voice wavers and Taehyung rolls his eyes. Rolls his fucking eyes at you!

“Listen, come. Or don’t. I don’t really care.” Taehyung releases your hold on his shirt, unsticking your fingers and throwing your hand towards your body. “Decide.” He states before swiftly turning around to head towards the door.

Oh. So this guy is a fucking asshole. Noted.

You end up following him because although he was rude about it, feeling someone’s touch when you feel so scared was slightly comforting and yes, you are aware of how fucking pathetic that is.

Taehyung stands in front of the door, his hand reaching for the knob when he turns his head to say, “Just trust me.”

And now you are the one rolling your eyes. Trust him? You just met the dude! 10 minutes ago his name was Future Murderer. How could you possibly trust this asshole?

“How can I trust you? I literally just met you.” The scowl on your face deepens when he smirks.

“Are you always such a fucking baby?”

“Are you always such a fucking baby?” you mock, eyes rolling so far into the back of your head. Okay, you admit you aren’t being the most mature here. But Taehyung doesn’t seem to take offense to it by the way he gasps and throws a hand over his heart as if wounded.

“Oh? She’s got some sass?” His question and raised brows only piss you off.

“Whatever. Let’s go.” You aren’t entirely sure where the confidence comes from but you don’t question it. You’re breezing past him, your shoulder knocking into his as you approach the door.

You feel Taehyung’s eyes on you and hear him mumble a lame, ‘that’s the spirit’ from behind you. And with that, in one swift action you are opening the door.

You stand in the open doorway, once again frozen in place. Not feeling as confident as you were 15 second ago—maybe you just need this dude to piss you off again. Speak of the devil, Taehyung steps besides you, poking his head out into the hallway searching for any sign of life.

“It’s quiet.” He takes a few steps forward, now in the middle of the hall. You glance around, the hallway has walls full of beautiful artwork, and to the right is 3 doors and to the left is a wide staircase. An exit. Bingo.

“Let’s check each room.” And of course he wants to do the opposite.

“No, let’s just get out of here.”

You turn on your feet towards the stairs and stop at the first step and raise a brow over your shoulder, “Aren’t you coming?”

Taehyung looks conflicted to say the least. He exhales deeply, looking between you and the 3 doors.

“Shouldn’t we just—”

“No! come on…” You must sound pleading and convincing because you can see him falter, just a bit. “I just want to go home…” You say, averting his gaze. Taehyung only stares at you for what feels like an eternity before he’s finally agreeing with the nod of his head.

The two of you very cautiously step down the stairs, each foot that follows the other slightly trembles in the fear of the unknown. You two finally reach the bottom and your eyes go wide at the sight. This is basically your fucking dream house. The floor plan is very open. At the center is a gorgeous grand piano, you don’t play but it’s aesthetically pleasing you guess? To the right is a long table with picture frames and décor and down the hall there seems to be more rooms.

You scan the downstairs as you slide your fingers along the edge of this table and stop when you come across a framed photo. What the actual fuck. Your eyebrows rise and your eyes grow twice their size. You very hesitantly pick up the picture as your eyes blink down at the frame in hand when your breathing begins to pick up again. It’s a framed photo of you and your sister . Now why the hell would this be here? Why is there a picture of you and your sister?? Why would someone have this? The framed photo sits in your trembling hands as you stare down at it. Taehyung notices your shaky grip on this picture and takes it from you to take a look himself. His eyes also go wide…you look between him and the picture.

“Why…why the hell is this here?” your voice betrays you as it shakes with every word.

Taehyung glances down at the table and notices his own photos with friends and family that are disgustingly and proudly displayed.

“What the actual fuck?” Taehyung whispers to no one but himself. What the hell is going on? Why does this house have pictures of the two of you? Who is doing this? Is this some sort of sick joke?

“What’s happening Taehyung?” you step closer to him feeling entirely…creeped out.

“Does it look like I fucking know?” he snaps. He sees you flinch and his eyes soften, “Sorry…Its just… this is going too far.” He finally looks as disturbed as you feel. The two of you stay quiet for a few moments, neither of you knowing how to react to this eerie discovery.

You shudder at how ominous this all is. This is becoming way too much. How much more of this can you handle? You almost want to jump into this assholes arms and sob into his navy blue t shirt.

“We should…” Taehyung wipes his sweaty hands on his sweats, “keep going.”

The two of you nod your heads in unison and turn to your left where there is an entry way to the kitchen and living room. Taehyung stops before stepping through while you join him at his side. You two glance around to soak in your surroundings—it’s also an open space, the two open areas sharing a space. The kitchen is covered in black granite and wooden cabinets with a door that probably leads outside. The living room has two matching sofas, a wide screen TV that hangs on the wall over a fireplace and built in shelves on either side, full of books, movies and games.

Taehyung and you share a look before walking through to the kitchen and living room. You approach the rooms slowly and carefully, afraid of what you might find. What surprises could be lurking. Suddenly the white glow of the TV can be seen, making you jump with its sudden brightness. Why the hell did the TV just turn on? Is this like, a haunted house? Are you being fucking haunted? Okay, maybe that’s dramatic.

The screen is bright white with nothing else on it. You turn to face Taehyung who is already staring at you with brows pinched together in confusion. Same Taehyung, same. The two of you decide to walk closer to the TV when dark, bold numbers appear.

“10….9…8…..”

The sound of soft music can be heard playing from the TV, similar to the music that’s played in an elevator, as numbers counting down from 10 begins. You feel your insides twist and turn.

“….7….6…..”

Panicked, the two of you inch closer and closer. You two stand here waiting for something, anything to occur because these might be the longest 10 seconds of your life. The millions of questions you have only multiplying. With the seconds counting down and getting closer to zero, your breathing about fucking stops. What is going to happen? You can feel your palms grow sweaty as your heart beats out of your chest. It feels like the countdown to the end of the world.

“….5….4….3…”

You don’t think Taehyung realizes just how close he is to you, his shoulders bumping into yours. You guess fear does funny things even between strangers.

“….2…..1…….”

And then it finally happens. The timer finally reaches fucking zero. And it is safe to safe your attention has been caught…anyone’s would be if a screen greets them with their god damn names.

“Welcome Kim Taehyung and Y/N Y/LN”

Your names on the screen has you automatically feeling nauseas. What sort of sick game is this? Is someone setting you up? Pranking you? If so, shits not funny. But also, why is Taehyung here? Your eyes focus on the screen as it moves to the next slide.

“It is a great honor that you two have made it this far. You have been carefully selected in this company’s project. After a lot of consideration and impressive results—we have decided to move you to the next phase.”

Naturally, very naturally you become even more confused than you fucking started. What projects? What company? You can hear Taehyung swallow hard, his nerves spiking with each word he reads. Then the slides continue.

“To put it simply, we are in the business of love.”

Huh? Huh?

Taehyung and you break your focus on the screen to steal a glance as one another very briefly before turning your heads back to the TV. What the hell they mean love? What is this absolute nonsense?

“Our use of science, technology and logic has got us here today. We test and heavily observe our chosen subjects and decide if they are the perfect match. We then move them to the final phase: The Island. This is where the two subjects meet and get along for the first time. The place they will undoubtedly fall in love.”

You can’t help that your mouth falls open, you are sure your eyes are bulging out of your head. You dare to turn to look at Taehyung and he isn’t looking much better.

Before you can really gather any thoughts the slides continue.

“Our success rate is 99%. You WILL fall in love here, it is most probable. Other subjects will come to fall in love quickly, other will take their time. BUT don’t take too long~ If two subjects are taking too long to make progress we will send a ‘Request’ to move things along and if you fail to meet said request there will be a penalty. And you have 24 hours to complete the request. This is to help you.”

You shiver while reading the words before you. You are now too anxious to even look at Taehyung right now…you don’t want to even see his reaction to all of this. Is he anxious like you? Is he laughing because there’s no way this is real? Is he nodding along taking notes because he believes it? You don’t want to fucking know!

“We give soulmates the opportunity to meet and thrive. This particular project has been in the works for well over a year.”

You blink lazily at that. Well over a year? WELL OVER A YEAR? They’ve been watching you for over a year?!

“We have carefully observed each one of you in great detail. There is nothing we don’t know. We have matched you two to be most compatible.”

Nothing they don’t know? What the hell does that mean? How exactly did they fucking observe you two? You stand here with eyes wide open and mouth agape. Taehyung mirrors your expression. He doesn’t want to believe this either.

“And you two are finally ready to proceed with The Island.”

The two of you stand in the living room, dumbstruck. Absolutely dumbstruck. You aren’t even able to look at one another for more than a hot second. A harsh blush creeping on your face and you cringe because there’s no way you could blush for this asshole.

You just…you cannot believe any of this. You refuse to. This is ridiculous. Insane.

“This island is only for the two of you. Designed specifically for you. You are being constantly monitored. Hidden cameras are placed all around the house. Minus the bedrooms and bathrooms. The décor and food is to each of your likings, we want you to feel at home as possible. Everything including books, movies, games and rooms are to your likings and match your hobbies.”

Wait a minute. You frantically shake your head, blinking furiously. Constantly being monitored? AKA you’re being fucked spied on? How are you supposed to do anything knowing you’re being watched?

“Your families have already been notified of your absence.”

You feel your heart drop. You didn’t even consider how they might feel.

“You will return safely once we feel we are satisfied with the results. This can be 3 months, 6 months, a year or even more.”

You feel Taehyung spin to face you in complete shock.

“We understand this may seem awkward at first but things will evolve naturally. So you should not worry.”

These words do not bring the least bit of comfort.

“Besides the ‘Requests’ we will not interfere. This is YOUR time to fall in love.”

“Thank you so much for your ongoing participation and please enjoy your new home and of course, each other. <3”

The added heart at the end of the last slide has both of you scrunching your faces in disgust. With that, the TV shuts off, showing nothing but the dark black screen and the reflection of two ghosts. What. The. Fuck.

You’re sure your expression is as clear as day; a mix between anger and hopelessness. You don’t want to look at Taehyung, not after everything you just read but you know you should. So you tip your head to the side to get a good look at him. Worry. All you see is worry. Look, he might be hot as hell but there ain’t no way you can fall in love with this dude. But also, you don’t know anything. You gulp, there is one thing you know. You’re going to be sick.

Your nausea is so built up, it’s at the entrance of your throat begging for release. You stand here, running a clammy hand through your hair. You are going to puke, you know it.

Without any further thinking, you run towards the back door in the kitchen that thankfully leads to outside. You run down a path that you pray to the God’s that this path does lead to the ocean so you can drown yourself in some good ol’ waves. Your anxiety has you out of breath before the run does. You finally reach sand that is warm and grainy under your bare feet and follow it to the shore.

It’s beautiful actually. The view. You wish you could really take it all in and let the calmness of the waves relax you but you are seconds away from upchucking last night’s pizza rolls. But it never comes. Your guts never make it out of your body but the anxiety remains. Falling to the ground, you pull your knees into your chest, trying to breathe and most importantly trying not to cry. This is no use though and to be honest you don’t try very hard because tears are cascading down your face within seconds. You can feel the burning in your chest as hot tears fall onto the warmth of your cheeks and it breaks you further. You sit here and wonder if you are really stuck here in this place and with a complete and total stranger. The same thought stays with you as you ball into yourself.

You sit here, indulging in quiet sobs until they finally ease into soft sniffles. You reach up to wipe your eyes, ridding yourself of tears and the thoughts that came along with them. You need to think more clearly. Okay, positive thoughts. Come on y/n, you can do this. Positive thoughts. First off, you’re not alone. You are not the only victim here. You have an acquaintance here who you are sure isn’t very pleased about this either. But wait—would if this guy is a total weirdo? A psycho? Okay, maybe being positive is harder than you thought. Plus he was a total asshole to you earlier. But maybe that will change?

You stand to your feet, feeling more determined than before. You are going to try to make the best out of this shitty situation. You brush away the annoying leftover grains of sand from your legs and your behind and turn around to make your journey back to the house, your ‘home’. Ew, you did not just call it that, you shudder at the thought. Before you start walking, you spot Taehyung aka your ‘soulmate’ ew, you did not just him call him that— sitting, leaning against a tree. Yup, right next to where you just had snot running down your nose. Before spiraling into embarrassment, you take a good look at him and oh. You step towards him and his eyes follow your movements until you are seated next to him. He’s tense, that’s for sure. But you can’t really blame him, now can you? You are a little bit selfish, aren’t you? He is clearly freaking out too yet you ran out on him. You can see his expressions now: confused, anger, upset. And something you can’t quite figure out.

Taehyung looks your way and offers you a small, tense smile and then turns his head away from you to face the ocean again, a sigh escaping his lips.

“I’m not going to fall in love with you.”

You really don’t want to feel offended because hey, that’s fair. But still, this asshole doesn’t even know you so you roll your eyes.

“I’m not going to fall in love with you dude.”

Taehyung glances at you and gives you a look, like he knows that’s impossible.

“Sure.” He says.

“You don’t fall in love with me.” You snap back, feeling like you won something.

“Yeah, that won’t be a problem.” He deadpans.

“Listen…you’re not a psycho, are you?” You narrow your eyes at him. Taehyung stares at you for a second before he dramatically rolls his eyes at you, then he narrows his own eyes.

“I’m not a psycho,” he defends, a serious expression drawn on his face. “But how do I know you’re not?”

You bite down on your lip as if really contemplating,

“Fair point.” You smile cheekily but then your face falls into a frown. “This isn’t…real, right?” you try to brush back your hair behind your ear but the wind makes it difficult. “The TV…this is a joke, right?”

Taehyung looks on towards the ocean, the big blue waves crashing in the distance. He is silent for several long, annoyingly long moments. You can’t help but wonder what goes inside his head, what is he thinking? What is he feeling? It’s got to be similar to you, right?

“Let’s say it is real. There’s a company who…who…spied on us for a year. What does that mean? They hacked our phones? Hacked our homes? How far did they go? They said they know everything…” Taehyung pauses, flinching at his own words. “So, say they do. They believe after all their research we make a good match…the perfect match, apparently.”

“Yeah, I highly doubt that.” You cut in. “We couldn’t even get along in the first 10 minutes—”

“That’s because you were being a baby.”

“That’s because you were being a—Shut up.” You huff.

“Who’s being rude now?” Taehyung smirks. “Listen, I think it’s best if we just play it safe. But I am serious…I won’t be falling in love with you. And I am not a psycho.”

“And I am serious too, I won’t.” you remind him, annoyed. “It’s you who should be careful.” You poke your tongue out and Taehyung rolls his eyes.

“So do you like pancakes? Mister Not Psycho.” You look at him with a playful smirk and he wastes no time to curve his lips downwards.

“Pancakes?” he lifts his brows but then a scowl takes over, “I’m not falling in love with you even if you make me pancakes. I still can’t get over this…they spied on us for a year y/n. Invaded our privacy…this is too much. Too much to be thinking about god damn pancakes”

“Yeah but it seems like we’re stuck together,” you reason, “Whether we like it or not. So you can maybe try not to be such an asshole to me? When I’m just as much of a victim as you are. And we still have to eat.”

Taehyung’s mouth drops a little, then he closes it, screwing his eyes shut. “You’re right…I’m sorry,” he stands to his feet. “This is all just so crazy and a lot to take in…”

“I know…” you pause, “It’s sort of like being on a vacation—”

“Just stop.”

Taehyung walks past you, heading back inside the house. Leaving you alone with nothing but the ocean.

You stare off into the wide unknown, the oceans blue emptiness swallowing you whole. This looks like a dream vacation spot, if you’re being honest. But this? This was about to be the vacation from Hell.

~~~~~~~~

You and Taehyung walk through the door back into the kitchen, a look of grimace on his face while you frown. You two decide to check out what this place has to offer. You’re both clearly skeptical of this whole entire situation, well at least he is. He feels like the only one who is acting appropriately. But he can safely assume you probably are feeling a bit skeptical yourself. You two check to see is there is anything safe to eat—if there even is food. He doesn’t know what to believe. Was this situation, he doesn’t know…real? True? Every word he read, is a loud echo in his mind screaming at him. How could he even take this seriously? How could you take this seriously? This is fucking insane! He looks over at you, who is rummaging through cabinets, you look the same as a few minutes ago—calm with an unsure expression painting your features. He hates how calm you look, he can’t help but feel so annoyed by you.

He takes a look in the large, silver fridge and is pleasantly surprised to see many foods that he likes; lots of fresh fruits, juices, milk, sandwich meats, so on. It is fully stocked. He reaches inside the fridge for a bowl a fresh fruit, his other hand grabbing for a can of whipped cream. He gives you a look and nods towards the bowl.

“Should we test them? See if we die from poison or some shit?” he half jokes, his bitter tone shining through. You try to ignore his bad attitude and smile.

“We’re testing them with a can of whipped cream?” you go for a lighter approach but he just rolls his eyes.

“Go big or go home, am I right ladies?”

You snort. Real life snort. And you consider being embarrassed but you see Taehyung’s eyes light up in amusement before they’re darkening again.

You reach for a strawberry and pop that thang in your mouth, so he does the same. You two chew cautiously, the flavor and juices bursting. These might be the best god damn strawberries either of you have ever had. Such a shame they are being enjoyed in such a situation. He turns to face you, the you who is now stuffing your face with strawberry after strawberry, he can’t help but let a chuckle slip between his lips.

“What? Go big or go home…” you pause, a smirk playing at your lips. “Right ladies?” Taehyung only rolls his eyes at your smart mouth, he won’t allow himself to laugh.

Taehyung is still trying to gather his impression of you. When you first met you were a total cry baby, then you were just annoying and now you’re trying your best to be calm. He recalls how you ugly cried just outside—god, you have been a roller coaster of a person but considering your situation he understands why.

He believes he was more unbothered and brave after having first woken up…but after seeing those framed photos he got freaked the fuck out, to put it simply. Then the TV…everything just went downhill from there. And he sees what you’re doing…you’re trying to be strong. And he hates you for it. Why is he being the weak one here? How are you doing it with such ease? He’s spiraling. His whole life just got put on pause. His dreams and aspirations? Pause. Friends and family? Pause. His love life? P-Pause? He can’t help but worry over every detail, not to mention…is any of this the truth? Are you two just supposed to believe the god forsaken words that you read on the TV screen? And you went on about this being like a damn vacation. Unbelievable! But all he can do right now is breathe in and breathe out and try to be himself. Which at the moment is a really unhappy person.

You and Taehyung continue reaching into the bowl for more refreshing fruit, your fingers brushing against one another like this is a god damn Hallmark movie, but you don’t seem to be fazed by it so he won’t either. Even though it’s driving him crazy, he doesn’t want to touch you. He wonders what your thoughts are on the whole ‘love’ thing? It’s ridiculous. Don’t get him wrong, in a different situation he could see himself getting along with someone like you, maybe even hook up…but fall in love? Not likely. Plus he already has someone. Sort of.

“Ah, wait…” He pauses mid bite.

“Hm?” you hum, mouth full.

“Aren’t we like, supposed to be finding pancake mix or whatever shit you wanted to find?”

With a roll of your eyes, you lick your fingers clean while the other hand lays rest on you hip. (And no, his eyes did not linger when you sucked on your fingers and no, they did not travel down to your hand that rest comfortably on your nice hips.)(And no, he did not just think your hips are nice.)

“Couldn’t find any!” you dramatically yell out, “You guys FAILED us!” you then look over at him with a smirk, “So much for being experts right?” you scoff, he almost wants to laugh at your dramatics but he just stares at you blankly.

But soon that blank stare is changing into a sour one when he realizes just who you are talking to…the very company that trapped you here. The one that’s watching over you right now. Or so they say.

“We should inspect the whole house.” He says seriously, “You know, get to know this ‘vacation home’ or whatever bullshit you said.”

You look down at your feet, feeling fucking embarrassed.

“Sorry for calling it that I—”

“I know,” Taehyung kind of smiles, “You were just trying to make us feel better. I get it.” His tone is softer than even he intended.

“It didn’t really help, did it?” you scratch the top of your head, feeling sheepish.

“Not really.” He answers honestly, with hard eyes. “Now come on, let’s check things out.”

You nod your head with an eye roll, he still chooses to be dickish.

The two of you walk into the living room to the entertainment center. The TV is surrounded by shelves of books, movies, and games. Apparently all to your liking, so you guess you will see how true that is.

“Woah, there’s Mortal Kombat. Sweet.” You comment, the game case in your hand.

“Woah, I can kick your ass at Mortal Kombat. Sweet.” Taehyung plainly responds while shuffling other games between his hands.

“Don’t even. I will play you right now.” You try lightening the mood but he just rolls his eyes.

“We have other important things to do, need I remind you?” he begins lecturing you and you scoff.

“You don’t need to remind me our shitty situation. Your stupid face is reminder enough.” You bite.

“Oh?” Taehyung continues to look through cases, barely paying attention to you.

“Anyway,” you clear your throat. “There’s tons of movies here and TV shows as well,” you gesture toward the bottom of the shelf. “Some I have never seen before,” you squat down, your fingers brushing against DVD cases until you stop at one in particular, pulling it out. “Like, what the hell is ‘Castaway on the Moon’?”

Taehyung’s eyes widen, “UH, only my most favorite movie ever?” he says, taking the case from you.

“Looks weird.” You comment plainly.

“Weird—it’s not weird! It’s actually really good I swear, actually you know what?” Taehyung huffs out, it’s the first time you’re seeing him get so worked up. It’s amusing. “I don’t have to explain myself to you.” He pouts, clearly wounded you would think to call his favorite movie ‘weird’.

“Plus, who’s weird?” he asks, “What’s with all this anime? I know it ain’t mine.”

You jut out your bottom lip in guilt, your cheeks turning a rosy pink.

“Well, well…”

“Well, well…” he mocks, feeling satisfied.

You raise your eyes to meet his and walk an inch towards him, never breaking contact.

“I’ll give yours a shot, if you give mine a shot?” you challenge, sticking out your hand. He guesses you want him to shake it.

He takes a moment to let his eyes linger on yours. They’re dark. Plain. Boring. Nothing special. He looks away and scoffs but the idea of sharing his favorite movie with someone does pique his interest.

“Deal.” He says, going in for the handshake. He feels your hand in his and doesn’t expect your skin to be so soft.

“Deal.” You say with an evil glint in your eye. “I’m going to make you watch so much good shit.” You continue to hold on to his hand, you look down at them and become slightly shy. You just remembered your situation. You keep staring for an odd amount of time before you drop his hand and shake your head.

“Should we check out the other rooms?” you start walking towards the entry way back into the main area of the house, but stop to turn and look at him.

“Yeah, I suppose we can do that.” He answers back, trying to sound as neutral as possible.

The two of you walk back into the main area where the rooms are located. He hesitantly creaks open the first door. He’s met with a room so fitting. A room full of art supplies. Drawing boards, brushes, paint, etc. He feels his palms pool with sweat.

“Do you make art?” you question, looking up at him.

“Yeah.” He gulps, feeling creeped out all over again. “They really did their research, huh?” he whispers to himself.

You two stand in the doorway, taking it all in. Taking in what this could really mean for you two. It begs the question: Were they really spying on you for over a year? Do they really know everything there is to know about you two?

You softly nudge Taehyung, “Why don’t we move on to the next room?” you suggest. He turns his head to face you as he swallows hard, nodding his head in agreement.

The next room is nothing spectacular, just a home gym.

“You work out?” he asks.

“Barely,” you admit, a small smile tugging at your lips. “I always have the excuse of not having time or not wanting to go all the way to a gym. Guess I have no excuse now.” You look up at him with a sheepish grin. It’s hard to believe you don’t work out, Taehyung thinks. You have great legs.

“I see.” He turns his back to you, exiting the room.

The next room really wows Taehyung. He doesn’t mean for it to. He wants to hate this place.

It’s a room full of musical instruments and recording equipment.

“Holy shit.” He accidentally lets out. He walks around the room, touching things with just his fingertips. “This is like grade A equipment, I could only dream of owning shit like this.” He truly does not mean to be in awe of the music room, you know, because the enemies gave it to him but holy shit!

There’s only one room left and you swear to god it better be for you. You two slowly open the door together to reveal an interests of yours.

“Is this…? Like, a dance studio or something?” He questions, glancing around the room, “Are you a dancer?” he finally looks at you and he seems quite impressed.

You look…surprised, to say the least. Your brows shooting up all the way toward your hairline, your eyes darting all around the room.

“N-Not exactly…I mean, kind of?” you admit, your eyes falling to your hands. He tilts his head in confusion.

“I…I just have a serious interest I guess you could say,” you look all around the room again, “But I,” you play with your fingers. “I have never said it out loud to anyone.”

“Oh.” Taehyung breathes out in understanding. So, these fuckers really did spy on you guys. In depth. You both feel goosebumps rise on your arms, making you both feel a chill.

“Let’s head upstairs. Shall we?”

The upstairs has 4 doors in total. You both know the door closest to the staircase is the bedroom you woke up in.

“There’s no bathroom in this room,” he motions towards the door. “And the closet was empty. So, it’s not the master and that—”

“That means there’s multiple bedrooms.” you finish for him, and you both sigh in relief.

He means, this place has a goal of getting you together, so he wouldn’t be surprised if they only offered you one bedroom, but thank the God that he doesn’t believe in that there’s more than one bedroom.

“Yeah exactly,” he breathes out. “I’m willing to bet the door at the end of the hall is the master. Wanna just skip ahead?”

“Sure,” you agree, walking past him to beat him to the door at the end of hall. But you wait for him to reach the door as well before you’re reaching for the knob and slowly turning it, swinging the door open.

The room is big, a huge king size bed in the center of the back wall. Thankfully, the drapes are dark so not a lot of natural sunlight enters the room, Taehyung thinks.

“Hell yeah, dark curtains.” You say excitedly. Obviously reading his mind.

He follows behind you, keeping his comments to himself as you ooh and aah at your surroundings. He is impressed by the rooms simple yet he guesses you could say intriguing décor. Definitely fits his style, but he won’t say that out loud. As an artist himself, the paintings on the walls are very pleasing to the eye. He wonders if they suit you as well. If you’re his ‘soulmate’ they would, he thinks bitterly. He could see himself adding his own artwork to this room. He wonders if you would be okay with that as well—wait. What is he saying? It’s not like you two will be sharing this room!

You drag your fingers across the comforter on the bed.

“Soft.” You mumble to yourself.

He chews on his lips for a moment before speaking, “You can have it…” he shifts from one foot to the other. “The room, I mean. I’ll just take the other bedroom.”

“Really? You sure?” The excitement is evident in your voice. “Wait no—that’s not very fair. We could thumb wrestle for it or—”

He raises a brow, “Thumb wrestle? Really?”

“Mortal Kombat?” you offer.

“That just wouldn’t be fair, I would win too easily.” He says, not impressed. “Just take the room. I’m sure.”

“Fine…thank you.” you bow your head down in defeat.

The two of you walk towards the master bath and your eyes come close to popping out of your heads. It is huge! And super fancy! He’s not good at fancy words but he’ll put it simply, the countertop is long with two sinks. Two sinks. The shower has one of those rain shower head things and woah. That’s for like, rich people. The way you are gawking at this bathroom tells him you’re having the same thoughts as him. Yours are probably fancy like, “This extravagant marble bathtub looks exquisite against these cream colored walls. Very…dashing.” Or some wild shit like that.

The closet is next, He’ll be completely honest. He forgot you would need clothes and shit. But holy moly, there are rows and rows of clothes, both yours and his. There is jewelry (Not really sure why that’s necessary but like, okay) and shoes on shelves against the walls. It was more than he owned himself back at home.

“Honestly I forgot about needing clothes…since we like…live here now.” The words are sour leaving your mouth, he can tell. But also, you are obviously reading his mind again.

“What? You thought you would be wearing your cute little PJ’s 24/7 or what? Wear nothing at all maybe?” he asks, shuffling from one foot to the other. He’s uncomfortable.

“ha-ha.” you deadpan. “I just haven’t really thought about what this all entails is all.”

He frowns at your words,

“We should probably talk about it, right? What this all means, I mean.” His questions causes a shift in the atmosphere. The air becoming a little thicker.

You only nod and turn on your feet to head back into the bedroom. He quickly follows behind you, both of you stopping at the foot of the bed.

“Let’s talk then.” You bite your lip, swaying side to side.

He needs to be honest. He is clearly so confused about all this. Fucking puzzled. He means, what if just what if this company was real? And this company was…right? Are you really a match made in heaven? No, that can’t be. That would be fucking ridiculous. He’s being ridiculous for even considering it. But you two obviously need to talk. Have a fucking chit chat.

You plop down on the edge of the bed and he follows your lead, finding a spot right next to you. Your knee shakes up and down quickly while you play with the hem of your shirt. You’re obviously nervous as fuck, which he can’t really blame you. He watches you for a few moments before hesitantly placing a hand over your shaking knee, trying to stop the anxious movement and hoping to God he is not crossing any serious lines, he’s just really getting annoyed by your shaking knee and needs that shit to stop. You turn your head to face him and he is met with a look of frustration. He turns his head to face straight ahead and with a heavy sigh he says, “I feel that way too.” Because it’s true, you both must feel the same. It’s not like you want to be stuck here with him either. Right?

You finally let out a long breath, “How long?” you whisper. “How long will we be stuck here?” you begin to sniffle as your eyes become wet. Shit. He brings his hands to his lap and interlocks his fingers together.

“I…I don’t know.” He answers honestly. “But what are your thoughts? On what we read…” he clears his throat, clarifying as if it wasn’t already obvious.

You suck in a sharp breath, “I don’t know what to believe.” You admit. “But we are…” you gesture between you two, “This is—This is not happening.”

Taehyung rolls his eyes as if that wasn't the most obvious statement in the world. He. Could. Not. Agree. More.

You continue, “Someone deciding for me? On this part of my life? That doesn’t sit right with me. No fucking thank you.”

“Yeah, me either.”

“I mean,” you turn to face him, “You seem decent and all, when you’re not being an ass, but this is all insane. Just insane.” You wear an annoyed expression, shaking your head in disbelief. He breathes out of his nose in attempt to laugh.

“Yeah, you’re telling me.”

“But…” you pause, choosing your next words carefully…you have to be careful with this next part. “But if it’s real? What are we—” and yup, just as expected, you are cut off with just a look. He furrows his brows together and pushes his head back in surprise.

“This can’t be forced y/n.” he states firmly. You raise your hands up in surrender.

“Oh my god, Taehyung. I know that! I fucking know, jeez. But we have to talk about all the possibilities.” You say firmly, “We’re stuck here for who knows how long and you read the same thing as me, right?” you push on, “3 months? 6 months? A fucking year?” you drag a heavy hand down your tired face. “And don’t even get me started on these damn ‘Requests’ and whatever they are!” You are clearly very frustrated…Taehyung looks at you with the same pity you’re sure he feels for himself.

“Okay, okay.” For the first time Taehyung speaks to you much more softly. “Listen, they can’t keep us here forever? We are going to prove we are that 1%. We just got to stay out of one another’s way and just wait it out until they return us home.” Then his frown deepens, “But wait, what about the ‘Requests’?” he asks, concern lacing his voice.

You strum your fingers on your thigh, staring down at your lap, in deep thought.

“I know this is weird but…” Taehyung starts.

“I know, we have to talk about it.” You finally look up at him and your entire face has gone pink.

“If the ‘Requests’ are, I don’t know, “pure” enough, we could just like do them?” you look at him with doe eyes, “Or like, if the penalty isn’t that bad…. I don’t know.” You ramble on.

The thing is, neither of you know what to expect from these ‘Requests’ and their penalties. It’s one huge mystery. And neither you nor Taehyung are a fan of mysteries. Taehyung watches as you begin shaking your knee in total panic again when he clears his throat.

“Hey…I think we can worry about that when or if the time comes, okay?”

“When or if…” you repeat slowly. “Okay.”

He stands from his place at the bed and begins walking towards the bedroom door.

“As long as we stay out of each other’s way, we should be good.”

“Stay out of each other’s way…” you nibble on your lips, “Like, we don’t talk or anything?”

“Precisely. You do your thing, I’ll do mine.”

“But—”

“That’s just the way it’s got to be.”

“Fine.” You speak bitterly, “Fine by me.”

Stuck on a beautiful island in a beautiful house with a beau—with a man. What could possibly go wrong? Vacation from hell, here we go.

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Mr. Dice (again)

Debut: Donkey Kong 64

I have finally done it, gamers! I have finally started playing Donkey Kong 64, for the first time ever in my life! I must say, I can see why the Gamers are always accusing this one of Bad Game Design, but I also must say, I do not care! I am having a whole lot of fun, and while there are indeed questionable design decisions, I do not feel very bothered by them. They are just too funny! Like, there are bananas of assorted colors all over, only tangible to specific simians? You rescue Lanky Kong and he says “I’ll help you by collecting blue bananas”? What the heck! To me, this is all way to delightful to be upset with!

And my favorite enemy in the game is... one who we already had a post about over two years ago! But he can have another. All to himself. This is Mr. Dice! A lot has changed in two years, and even Mr. Dice has changed, in that I made his background transparent a few days ago in a sudden burst of motivation! Now he can move his limbs around for the first time in over 6 years.

As you may be aware, when Rare started developing for the Nintendo 64, they changed a bit. In Banjo-Kazooie, they started putting eyes on everything and making everything talk, but then that extended to DK 64 as well! They started turning Donkey Kong into an Object Show! I don’t mind, of course. After all, I am writing this post out of love for one of those Objects! It is just, again, very funny to me. And they’ve also come a long way since the likes of Dumb Drum.

Mr. Dice, however, does NOT have those eyes that Rare is so famous for, and I think he is better for it, because the ones he has are so charming! Of course, they are formed by the two dots on the Two side, positioned on the same level to be more immediately readable as eyes. Did you know that the dots are called pips? It is cute. Have you also noticed Mr. Dice’s incredibly realistic hand texture? I wonder whose hand that is! If you are reading this and that is your hand, thank you so dearly for your contribution.

I like this image from Textures Resource. It’s like a dialogue portrait. Not that Mr. Dice talks to you at all, since he is simply as basic as an enemy can be, running toward you to attack and being defeated in one hit. And then dropping a watermelon slice. Would you eat that? I wouldn’t. Other enemies could just be carrying around their melon as a snack, but Mr. Dice was manufactured in the very factory you find him in! He had no opportunity to acquire a fruit. Do not eat it.

Mr. Dice may be a basic enemy on his own, but you know how apes together strong? Toys together strong, too! Mr. Dice can combine with Sir Dominoes, Blocks, and Super Blocks to form the formidable Toy Monster! If this were some sort of Cool media, this would be followed by a cheesy one-liner like “playtime’s over” or something. Good thing this is Silly media instead, where its appearance is followed by Chunky Kong jumping into a barrel with his face on it and becoming gigantic to beat it up!

There is only one Mr. Dice in the Toy Monster, but it gets to be the head! It is the big cheese around here! And here, it’s rotated to seem like it has FOUR eyes instead, which is a very neat touch. Upon defeat, the Toy Monster releases, of course, a Golden Banana. I would not eat this either, but it is not for eating, so it’s okay.

Also! Did you know that “dice” is acceptable as a singular noun? You don’t have to use “die” as a noun! You can just say “a dice” if you want to! It’s liberating!

[keerishima]

HELLO! I saw you were a new blog that needed requests and I was wondering if you could write head-canons for todoroki, bakugou, and kiri (separately) with a s/o that has a witchcraft quirk? TY

well hi! thank you for the request, it was so cool to write! now i’m assuming you mean like a quirk that works like potions and herbs/crystals and spirit summoning and spells which is the road i’m taking i hope that’s okay?

now this boy is

excited

when he first saw the mist swirling around your fingers as you fought the robots in the UA exam, a shock went through his body

what was that? 

okay he didn’t mean to stare- considering he was in the middle of an exam- but the way you moved and the glints of a crystals around your body was just so cool

time passed and he got closer to you, during the dorm competition your room was the only room he wanted to see and boy did he love it

the green ivy and plants in your room, the pots and white smoke curling from diffusers and shelves full of powder and inks organised in a neat row

your room felt like a whole new world- like magic

literally after everyone had left he was still in your room looking around like a meerkat assessing it’s surroundings

fast forward; you guys are dating and he was VERY curious as to how your quirk worked, and you explained how your spells and energy came from the crystals and jewels

each crystal gave you a different energy, which converted to your power!

kirishima literally watched in awe as you pointed at all the different coloured gems and jewels and the symbols on your walls

he even asked to touch some of them and asked where you got them

he also asked to see them in battle, and asked if you had any similar to his own quirk!

the both of you engaged in LOTS of different mock battles, which almost always ended up in a play fight rather than real training- just because he ends up enjoying watching you use your quirk too much to actually focus

once you two had engaged in a long, breathless make out session against one of the walls- what can I say? you wanted to see what it felt like to kiss kirishima in his red riot form and have him melt back to normal under your touch

yeahh...it was a bad idea to do that in the school gym, where half of class 1-B caught you two mushed together against a wall

back to the hc!

he asks SO many questions

sometimes just sits on your bed for ages and asks one after the other after the other, to the point where aizawa has to come and send him back to his side of the dorm

let me tell you now: if you are 1) planning to get anything or 2) NEED anything, don’t let him find out

you once let it slip that you were considering getting pouches to carry these crystals, and the sweet, sweet boy went out and bought BUCKETS of bags

yes buckets because he didn’t know if your crystals would be affected by material or size of the bag or- god forbid what if it did and he ruined your quirk in battle?! 

he’d never forgive himself.

ever.

like literally he’d be on his knees ready for punishment of how you saw fit because of his mistake

what can i say? the boys dramatic

but its endearing :,)

it ended up being the cutest date of you cuddled up on his bed wrapped in his blankets like you were drowning in them,

whilst he sat on the floor, presenting each little bag and pouch to you, all teleshopping style.

‘and THIS 🤩 gorgeous article comes with not just 1😱! not just 2 😱! but THREE 🤯🥵🥳🥳 buttons to clip close to ensure a tight, secure hold of your 😏 special package’

yeah he made a sleazy face

yeah you threw a plushy at him

all of them were bought with your costume in mind and how could you not keep some of the bags? with kirishima watching you with the biggest eyes and slightly-pouting-lips-but-he-would-never-admit-it there was no way you didn’t keep the most useful ones

you asked him to return the extra bags so he wouldn’t have wasted his money, whilst you repaid his kindness with lots and lots of kisses and cuddles

;) or more depending on how you want it

todoroki is uhh...

emotionally constipated

but thats not his fault

#fuckendeavour

sometimes it comes off that he’s not interested in your quirk in a general sense, but it’s only because he doesn’t know how to ask without seeming pushy

he gets shy (but doesn’t show it) but with time that decreases to a sort of dry affection

i’m not saying he’s a dry boyfriend but he definitely isn't as spritely as someone like Denki might be

the way you’d see that he wanted to know more was if he asked you to come and fight with him, train with him and study

this is where he asked about your quirk

he didn’t ask to the extent of kirishima, who said everything that came to mind, he asked precise questions that gave him all the information he was desperate to know because you are so cool it makes his heart burn needed

and he also knew you would add more information as you explained, which he loved because he loved hearing you talk so passionately

this time your quirk allowed you to control people to an extent, depending on different plants and herbs you used

the plants each had a special line, muttered as you dropped the herbs anywhere on your opponent for it to activate

best believe todoroki asked for one to knock endeavour out, literally out of nowhere💀

once, one night you had been laying on your bed, and todoroki had popped over to see you. it was still quite early on in your relationship so you weren’t expecting him to cuddle up beside you and tuck into your smaller body, chin hooked onto your shoulder whilst his eyes bore into yours from below todoroki loves eye contact

‘Do your plants have meanings?’

that’s it, that’s all he softly whispered in your ear

‘What do you mean?’ You whispered back

‘Like...like roses mean love...do your herbs have a meaning linked to what they do?’

okay now he was blushing, very gently because he didn’t want to annoy you, or ask you a question you’d never thought of and make you feel silly or insecure about his quirk

YOU on the other hand were smothering a dopey grin. you knew your boyfriend and his boundaries, and you knew that him asking you in such an intimate setting meant he was trying hard for you

you also knew that he’d just given you free reign to ramble however you saw fit

so you explained, how each herb did this, how if you mixed them they did that, if you made a liquid infused with them it helped with your application in battle and so much more

todoroki listened silently, but his eyes were gleaming

literally glowing in the darkness- I mean was that even possible? it had to have been considering how todoroki looked at you that night

after you were done, he replied with a similar thing about his own quirk, and both of you had a long long chat that went from quirks, to schooling, to life, to aliens and more

todoroki had the weirdest humour, he never knew he was being funny until your quiet giggles morphed into full blown laughter- and caused a knock from the next room over because you were being too loud

he would let out his own little chuckles and smirks, seeing you enjoy his company so much

it was a while after that day when something new happened

you’d sent him a message, whilst he was sitting right next to you, and your contact name flashed on his screen suddenly, catching your eye

‘my calendula’

you looked at todoroki

todoroki looked at you

you both blinked

‘calendula?’ you asked

‘yes’ todoroki replied

‘why calendula?’

‘because,’ todoroki blushed deeply, eyes flickering away from yours

‘because you said calendula means joy...you’re my joy. arent you?’

and god help anyone who tries to say you aren’t todoroki’s joy

because you would literally throw them to the ground

your heart soared at how todoroki loved you and your quirk so much

even though it wasn’t blatantly obvious, it was the little things he did for you 😍

he originally going to call you his basil until Bakugou came round behind him asking him if he was writing the dorms grocery list. safe to say that plan was aborted immediately :D

oho

sorry I just

*pfft*

bakugo amuses me, he really does he’s so entertaining

okay sorry back to the headcanon

I headcanon you’re REALLY strong

like STUPID strong

Remember bakugos reactions to all the students quirks and he was like ‘shit I cant beat them 😨’

And his reaction to todoroki? yeah he’d literally see you use your quirk and just

no I’m joking

but I feel like as your s/o he’d be super obsessed with your quirk

he’d always want to train with you, he’d see it as an amazing part of you that he wants to help hone so you can be the best of the best

not better than him obviously but the best anyway

not that he’d SHOW all of this awe and pride to you, it’s normally delivered in a bunch of bakugo sentences:

‘oi your form is shit. do this instead.’

that means he’s realised a new way you can throw this punch, with much more force

‘tch, go train. you need the training.’

he wants to train with you. again.

‘....finally. took you long enough to learn that.’

you’ve just done something successfully and he’s trying so hard not to blush at how well you did it.

here your power is more destructive

you can create sigils using a your finger in the air and they create attack power

this with bakugos quirk makes a formidable duo, and if he doesn’t get partnered with you he will most likely throw a fit

but not a long fit more of a like ‘oi why is she over there we work better together’

but he realises as heroes you need to work well with anyone you meet, so he’s not too fussy

because of the fact that you draw the sigils, you have a habit of tracing out patterns and new symbols and any sort of designs subconsciously

this is done normally on any part of your skin, with a pen

bakugo being old man bakugo 🙄 got mad at you

he told you off for almost giving yourself ink poisoning and ruining your hand and making it all dirty drama queen

but throughout all of this bakugo had been clutching your hand, and best believe he wasn’t letting go

he used the hand he was holding to pull you along and sit comfortably, dropping his own palm into your lap and mumbling something that kind of, sort of, might have been along the lines of ‘use my arm dumbass’

now you had bakugos arm to scribble on to your hearts content.

you used this when you were stressed, worried that your nerves were causing you to forget things or simply because you wanted to hold bakugo close

in fact, bakugo himself had adopted this habit, and you’ll notice I said arm instead of hand

bakugo got nervous around you, and therefore sweaty, which therefore lead to tiny little explosions in his palms when you were near

but this habit had started to make him feel comfortable with his hands around you, it made him trust himself more

he knew his power was strong and he didn’t want to hurt you, your quirk was something that helped him with that

and he wouldn’t tell you that but he was grateful. VERY grateful

he once asked why you used pen, and not your finger on your skin considering the pen ink is toxic

you answered very quickly, by pulling out a sheet of people and sliding your finger across the surface in a sigil shape

promptly the paper burnt into a cinder :)

and bakugo never asked again

and that is the end! I hope you liked it and I did the idea of Witchcraft justice 😅 please do send some more requests!

god I loved this so much they’re all so cute :,) thank you for this request!!

[miraculousreblogs]

I was just thinking about why I liked CatWalker so much and i realised..it's becuase he's like Viperion...almost a copy paste of him.

Let break down their main traits:

Professional yet friendly

Tactical/Tactician

Smooth

Resourceful

Takes initiative

(For ease of understanding and so that I don't have to mentions Adrien again and again let's assume CatWalker is a totally seperate character from him. Also I'll not claim to be completely unbiased. While I liked CatWalker I have a bigger preference for Viperion. Still i will try to be as neutral as possible. If you want to refute something do it nicely and not in the sense to attack me becuase your favourite character got critisized in a post about analysing his character similarities to a pre-existing character.)

So CatWalker...he's pretty neat yeah? A very dependable team mate.

Professional but friendly

It's pretty much shown to us in his introduction that he respects LB and wants to keep it professional. But that doesn't stop him from being friendly.

I can appreciate this.

But it's very much like Viperion. Who also is very into keeping things professional and smooth.

"Thank you for trusting me.", While returning the Snake miraculous to Ladybug. An example of how much he respects her and stays professional. He doesn't burden her with expectations of getting it back but doesn't show aloofness either.

Resourceful

CatWalker helps get back LB her yoyo in Kuro-Neko. This can be seen as a sign of resourcefulness since he claims it for his partner so as to make their fighting more efficient. More so, he believes Ladybug will need it for her Lucky Charm, a step he thinks of in advance. Which is pretty good when your job is to be a hero. (Heck, its good in any job or situation).

Similarly, Viperion finds out how to use the dino plush in Wishmaker and tells Ladybug how to use it effectively and wasting the least amount of time. One might argue that his power go through multiple loops of times doesn't count but it still resourceful. He makes defeating the akuma easier and that's what matters.

Tactician.

Both CatWalker and Viperion have a more tactician nature to them, like Ladybug.

CatWalker notices the piggy back slot on the cat's back and concludes it must be an akuma of sorts. Over here he observes and evaluates, talking a much more active role in decision making and team synergy.

Similarly Viperion notices how to defeat Desperada. He strums his lyre and finds out that Desperada cannot concentrate with his playing and uses it to help LB and Cat Noir defeat the akuma.

Smooth

CatWalker's overall aesthetic is pretty smooth. Not only is he fluid the entire fight but his line as claiming to take care of LB comes off smoothly and sweetly.

(I couldn't see it romantically but I admit it was a very nice moment.)

Similarly Viperion is like that in Desperada.

"Ladybug brings enough luck for all of us ", a smooth but reassuring line showcasing his trust in LB.

(it's also similar to how Luka is Mari's shoulder to cry on in the season 3 finale..but that's not really about Viperion since he's Luka's super hero form so I'm not sure if it counts. If you want it to count then it counts if you don't then...I can't really do anything about it)

Lastly comes their initiative/decision making.

While CN already had a bit of this it shows much clearly in CatWalker. When he leads away the Cat akuma and tries to calm it. Also the point of his resourcefulness can be counted here.

Similarly, Viperion also takes initiatives. While that is a given with his power..it makes even more sense when you see the fact that he choose that CN's identity reveal was not worth the victory and reset time in Wishmaker. He could have just as easily let it go and allowed the evryone to know CN's identity after he willingly have it up. But Viprion didn't do that and reset time instead.

There are only two major differences I can think of.

Firstly, Cat Walker has a more fighter role than a Tactician role, thus granting him more screentime. In comparison, Viperion is meant to work more from the shadows.

Secondly, CatWalker is LB's equal and therefore will actually have a different dynamic with her in comparison to temporary heroes. Viperion on the other is not going to interact with her as much as he will listen to her as she is the team leader.

These differences though become very Small with how little screen time CatWalker got. Failing to give him any 3D-ness that would diffrentiate him from Viperion.

Essentially it feels like Viperion's personality was copy pasted into CatWalker and as good as declared to be LB's ideal type by Plagg.

[jsio]

EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT

MILES PROWER, ANTI-TAILS

Moebius' true king.

Art by Arealscrog

Archie's wasted character

Who is Miles?

Miles Prower is the Anti equivalent of Tails, from Mobius Prime. He is afew years older, being 11 instead of 8 and much more mature. He still appears to possess Tails' youthful tenacity and desire for independence, but he has a violent rebellious attitude and shows no interest in holding himself to childish things, even though he's only 11 years old himself, hating the nickname "Tails" being an example.

Miles holds his younger counterpart in utter contempt for traits Miles sees as weaknesses, especially how Tails went down the path of Science and technology instead of his magical Chaos force heritage, implying that Miles went down a more mystical path instead of Science, but from what we see in the comic Miles is more in the political field, by that I mean he manipulates all the political aspects of Moebius.

His actions throughout the comic run make him out to be smart, picky, but also cold, calculating and always 5 steps ahead of his own team and Adversaries, this leading to Alicia making him the Suppression Squads leader behind the scenes, while she is the figurehead "ruler."

---------------------------------------------

That's Anti-Tails, Who throughout this I'll be reffering to as "Miles." Now you may be thinking, "Why make a post on an extremely obscure and hardly used Archie character? Why not someone Like Tails, Shadow or a more popular Archie character?"

Well, it's because I believe that Miles had the potential to be one of Archie's most intresting original characters, I believe he could've easily held his own "Suppression Squad" comic run, but Archie Unfortunately really underused him and wasted his potential, but hey...

That's where us fans come in!

---------------------------------------------

This post is All about Miles Canonical self, every canon fact I can find about him and his full story in his short run during Pre-Reboot Archie Sonic, and my own personal headcanons in the later post.

But...before I get into any the headcanons, I need to teach those who don't know him about him, I need to talk about his Canonical self..so, let's get into it. Headcanons will be in the follow up post.

Canonical Apprearnces.

(Reworded from the wiki)

First appearance

The first appearance of Anti-Tails was back when the character was just "Evil Tails" and it was of him joining the Anti Freedom fighters in an attempt to take over Mobius Prime, prior to the downfall of Eggman.

He and his evil allies pretended to be the good Mobius Prime versions, and struck knothole with acts of mayhem, vandalism and overall mischief, a common thing on moebius. The real Freedom Fighters soon returned to set things straight, but their initial attempts to defeat the Anti-Freedom Fighters failed as their Anti-Mobius selves knew their moves as well as they did. Sally Acorn came upon the solution: switching combat partners. When he faced Rotor, Evil Tails proved unable to overcome the larger and stronger Mobian. Defeated along with the other Anti-Freedom Fighters, he was sent back to Anti-Mobius, where they continued to cause mayhem despite the efforts of the kindly Dr. Ivo Kintobor (Anti-Robotnik) to stop them.

This was the last we saw Evil Tails for awhile, however we did see a cameo of him along with every other tails when they all came together and formed Titan Tails.

The Suppression Squad

Art by Pota on Pixiv

Some time passed before his next appearance, and in that time "Anti-Mobius" went through changes in its name, now "Moebius." And all the characters changed alongside it.

Miles had assisted Boomer in stealing Dr Kintober's goal posts in order to allow the Suppression Squad to have access to inter-dimensional travel. Scourge obviously took this opportunity and went straight to Mobius Prime, along with a few other members of the SS, Miles being one of them, and they attempted an assult on the Freedom HQ, where we see Miles' and Tails face off, with Miles declaring to not be referrd to as Tails or Anti-Tails, but instead just "Miles".

He also indicated his disgust at Tails for having chosen a path of Science and study, despite having a strong connection to "Chaos force", aka magic. This has led to people believing Miles himself is a magic user.

When Metal Sonic attacked Scourge, believing him to be the real Sonic, Miles stayed back and observed instead of helping his king. Now, you may think that's betrayal, but in reality Miles didn't help because he did not wish to undermine Scourges strength, so instead he observed. Soon after Sonic came onto the scene he showed his willingness to help anyone, even his enimies, and this gave Miles an idea:

Let's team up with the freedom fighters to betray Scourge, that's the new plan.

Miles later met up with Sally, Bunnie, Antonie and Tails to offer an alliance, but didn't let Tails speak and showed his contempt to the original version, telling him, "Please don't talk, little boy, We're trying to have an intelligent conversation." Sally accepted the offer, knowing she needed all the help she could get for taking down Scourge.

Upon returning to Scourge, pretending to be running from the freedom fighters, Scourge asked for a summary on his mission, that being "bomb New Metropolis" but Miles ignored him however, instead reporting to Alicia (Anti-Sally) that his mission was a success. Immediately thereafter, Alicia told the Suppression Squad to, "Show our King just what we think of him", with Boomer and Patch clearly readying for battle

However, Miles was doubling up his betrayal, blasting both Sonic and Scourge back into Moebius for them to Duke it out there, with Boomer sealing the portal behind them. An ethical debate followed this, between Sally, Alicia and Miles, the trio being ordered to get the goal posts ready to be able to return the freedom fighters to Mobius after both groups agreed to make sure Scourge was defeated on Moebius by Sonic

Miles was as shocked as the rest of the group to find Scourge had defeated all of his opponents as Super Scourge. When the rest of the Knothole Freedom Fighters and Suppression Squad were quickly defeated, Scourge turned his sights on Miles, identifying him as the mastermind behind the betrayal.

Miles, cowering in fear, denied his role in betraying Scourge, who was threatening to beat him for his betrayal. However, Miles was saved by Silver the Hedgehog and unlike the rest of his allies, wasn't even hurt. Following Scourge's defeat and Miles' attempt to recruit Buns Rabbot into the Suppression Squad, Miles spoke to Alicia about who would be their new leader. Alicia explained that while she may be the figurehead ruler, they both knew Miles held the real authority at this point, to which Miles grinned.

That was the last we see of Miles in the Archie comics, he unfortunately isn't in the post reboot because he's now owned by Ken Penders, so we'll never see him again. Below is all of his official designs, and after that is my final thoughts on the character.

---------------------------------------------

My overview of Miles as a character.

I'm no Character analysist so I'll make this short and sweet, my review of Miles is that he's a Character with alot of potential, but he went wasted, not on purpose, but thanks to the lawsuit.

I believe that if that lawsuit never happened, and that arc was closed up nicely Anti-Tails would of became a far more realistic and grounded Character, and probably pretty popular too. Miles to me is a kid who was manipulated into a life of crime and now believes that's what is right, and I think that could of been an arc for him, mellowing out and becoming a true king for the people of Moebius. I also like how when Scourge goes Super and goes to Miles to confront him, he dosent stand up to him, he dosent become strong, but instead he cowers in fear, hes terrified and tries to lie, to me, that makes him feel more grounded, and I like that.

Personally I wish Miles was more popular, I wish he got more spotlight than he did and I wish his story got concluded, but with what we got, I think he's pretty good, and pretty interesting too! I've seen alot of ideas float around for this dude, all of them making sense in they're on way, and to be honest? His lack of story kinda helps make him more accessible.

Tl:Dr: I like Miles alot, and I hope this post helps you lot learn more about him and overall, gets more people down to write with him, draw with him and explore him!

---------------------------------------------

Would I change him in any way?

Yeah, there's one key part of Miles (from what we got) that I think was wasted. Now, what is that? What would I change about a Character I've mostly praised? Well...

I wish he was magical. In the Archie comics Tails is actually strongly connected to the "Chaos Force", not as connected as Shadow, but still VERY connected, and guess what? Miles and Tails ARE biologically the same, same DNA, and in that bit of the comic, Miles calls Tails out on something he should have no idea about if he himself isn't connected to the same thing (or Moebius equivalent). To me at least this kind of implies Miles is magical too.

Basically, I'd give Miles' moveset a touch of magical abilities, connecting him to Moebius' "Anarchy force". I think it would help separate him abit more from Tails, while also connecting them, because whenever you have science and magic together...they clash.

But yea that's all I'd change in what we got, just hints of magic, some magic attacks here and there. I think it'd be pretty neat, and it'd have the science Vs magic aspect with him and Tails relationship.

---------------------------------------------

Lets finally wrap this up! At least, for now.

Thank you so much for reading all this If you did, it, this took me alot of hours, and I, I think it's over 2000 words now you madman. Why not spend your time doing something more worthwhile? Why not...have fun? meet someone? Go on a date? Live your life? Why read a post on an obscure Character, mainac.

But in all seriousness thank you for reading my post, I really like this character (clearly) and I want to teach people about him, and I hope this post has done that! Post 2. There's going to be a sequel post going over all of my personal headcanons, and possibly a 3rd going over community ones. Keep ya eyes out~

But yea, big read, now you lot know about an obscure Character, and this was fun to write! But now I'm gonna end this post with a fun fact:

Miles and the Suppression Squad were going to have one more arc, it was teased at the end of issue 196, but unfortunately it never got written. That would of been really neat but unfortunately it never got to happen.

---------------------------------------------

BON'VOYAGE, HEDGEHOGS!

[grailfinders]

Fate and Phantasms #167

Today on Fate and Phantasms we’re making the single horniest character in FGO (in every sense of the word), Heaven’s Hole, a.k.a. Kiara Sessyoin. One half enlightened saint, 99% insatiable demon, all NSFW. Kiara’s an Open-Hand Monk to give off that aura of purity she loves so much, but she’s also a Great Old One Warlock to finally answer the question, “Can you really be a warlock if your patron is yourself?” (The answer is yes)

Check out her build breakdown below the cut, or her character sheet over here!

Next up: Cheer for your empress! Wooooo!

Race and Background

Kiara may be human, but she’s been infused with the spirit of an otherworldly horror. That’s a Kalashtar, baby! This gives her +2 Wisdom and +1 Charisma, as well as some other mentally themed goodies. Your Dual Mind gives you advantage on all wisdom saves, and your religious training gives you the Mental Discipline to resist psychic damage. You can Mind Link to creatures within 10 times your level in feet, speaking to them telepathically for up to an hour or until you end the effect or link with another creature. Finally, you’re Severed from Dreams, meaning you’re immune to spells involving your dreams. Sleep still works, Dream doesn’t. God I wish that was me, it would make youtube so much less annoying.

As a Devilish Bodhisattva, you’re kind of a Sage, giving you proficiency with the Arcana and History skills.

Ability Scores

First things first, you’ve got to be so hot you can make people masturbate to death. That’s non-negotiable. I’ll leave the exact mechanics of that to your imagination, but it’s probably based on Charisma. Aside from manipulating people, you’re also just as good at reading people, and that’s Wisdom. You fight in a habit and  do it all without dying, so your Dexterity isn’t that bad either. Unfortunately this leaves your Intelligence a little lower than we’d like. You’re a hacker nun, but we needed other stuff more. Your Constitution isn’t that great, you’re so eager for pleasure you don’t last that long. Finally, dump Strength. You’ve got a demon god to do all the lifting for you, who needs muscles?

Class Levels

1. Monk 1: Starting off as a monk gives you Unarmored Defense, which is really useful for that “not dying” thing you like to do. You also get Martial Arts, letting you use your dexterity for your unarmed attacks. You can also attack as a bonus action after attacking with your action, and your unarmed attacks deal 1d4 damage, and they grow as you level up.

You get proficiency with Strength and Dexterity Saves, as well as Insight for your psychological training, and Religion for the whole nun/buddhist thing. You have a lot going on as a character, to be honest.

2. Monk 2: Second level monks get Ki Points they can spend to attack twice, dash, disengage, or dodge as a bonus action. You also get Unarmored Movement to speed things up a bit, and you get even faster as you level up.

3. Monk 3: Third level monks can summon a bit of demon pillar to Deflect Missiles, slowing down incoming ranged weapons and possibly even shooting them back as a reaction. (Obviously the demon thing isn’t all monks, but hush.) You also set down the Way of the Open Hand, learning the Open Hand Technique in the process. When you hit a creature with a flurry of blows attack (the two attacks as a bonus action thing), you can: force a dexterity save to knock the enemy prone; force a strength save to push it away; or remove its ability to react for the round. I’m not sure how you touching a person makes them fall to their knees or get distracted, get your mind out of the gutter.

4. Monk 4: Use your first Ability Score Improvement to bump up your Dexterity so you can actually hit people with your fists. You can also Slow Fall to reduce falling damage, presumably by swinging around on a demon pillar like some kind of spider woman, and you get Quickened Healing, letting you spend a ki point as an action to heal thy burgers. Despite your looks, you’re pretty tanky with all that healing.

5. Monk 5: Your Extra Attack does exactly what it sounds like, attacking twice in a single action. You can turn any of your attacks into Stunning Strikes, forcing a constitution save against getting stunned for a round. Ironically this is just leading into the explosive climax, where you beat the hell out of them. Where did you think I was going with that?

6. Monk 6: Sixth level monks get a little magical thanks to their Ki-Empowered Strikes so now your unarmed attacks ignore nonmagical damage resistances. You also gain a Wholeness of Body to heal yourself as an action. Unlike quickened healing, this baby heals you for 3 times your monk level once per long rest.

7. Warlock 1: Making your hands a little magical is nice, but we want to make stuff a lot of magical, and for that we’ll need to make some questionable deals. That’s where the Great Old One comes in, giving you Pact Magic you can cast with your Charisma and an Awakened Mind. It’s more telepathy. Not a huge boon, but now you can talk to two people at once, neat!

As far as spells go, Chill Touch lets you make creepy hands (kind of your thing), and Eldritch Blast gives you some generic magic projectiles. Charm Person makes you a bit more charming, and Protection from Evil and Good will help cut through those pesky rulers more easily by just straight up ignoring their god.

8. Warlock 2: Second level warlocks get Eldritch Invocations, to customize your soul pact a bit. Beguiling Influence makes you proficient with Deception and Persuasion to help cover up the whole demon pillar thing, and Thief of Five Fates lets you cast Bane with a spell slot once per long rest, further weakening your enemies.

You can also cast Arms of Hadar to launch more arms all around you for an AoE attack.

9. Warlock 3: Kiara’s definitely a weird one when it comes to her pact boon. Books have kind of fallen out of fashion by 2030, she doesn’t use weapons, and she really doesn’t care for a sidekick. That leaves her with the Pact of the Talisman to make her a little bit better than everyone else, letting the wearer add 1d4 to a failed ability check Proficiency times per long rest.

She can also cast second level spells now, like Enthrall! She’s the only person in the world according to herself, and now she is to you too! Just fail that wisdom save and you’ll have disadvantage on perception checks to notice anyone else!

10. Warlock 4: Use this ASI to bump up your Charisma for stronger warlock spells. You also get the On/Off cantrip from a super old UA to become a bit of a hacker, magically turning on or off an electronic device within range. You can also Detect Thoughts to be one hell of a therapist, being able to read the mind of a nearby creature as an action while the spell lasts. You can read surface thoughts over and over again, or you can probe deeper into the mind of a creature you’ve already read, forcing a wisdom save against the intrusion. Also, creatures are aware you’re reading their mind, and they can force a contested intelligence check to end the spell while they’re being read.

11. Warlock 5: Your first 3rd level spell is Hypnotic Pattern, to help dominate the minds of crowds all at once. You can also Mire the Mind to cast Slow once per long rest with a spell slot. Up to six creatures make a wisdom save, or they have their speed and AC reduced, take a penalty to dexterity saves, and can’t use reactions. On their turns, they can make either an action or bonus action, not both. It also can’t make more than one attack per turn. Finally, spellcasters affected by the spell have a 50% chance of taking 2 turns to cast a 1 action spell. Another wisdom save at the end of each turn can end the effect.

12. Warlock 6: All those hands and mind tricks coalesce into an Entropic Ward this level, letting you spend your reaction to impose disadvantage on an incoming attack. If it misses, you get advantage on your next attack against that creature. You can use this once per short rest.

You can also slip into your Heaven’s Hole persona by donning a Spirit Shroud, dealing more damage within a short area around you, preventing healing from enemies you hit with attacks, and slowing them down even further.

13. Monk 7: Bouncing back into monk gives you the Stillness of Mind to end effects messing with your thoughts as an action. The only person around here doing any charming today is you, thank you very much. You’d also be correct in saying the only person around here period is you, but I digress.

Your Evasion boosts your dexterity saves, so your failures are as good as other people’s successes, and your successes avoid damage entirely.

14. Monk 8: Use this ASI to bump up your Wisdom to become more observant, and get stronger techniques and a higher AC.

15. Monk 9: Ninth level monks get an Unarmored Movement Improvement, helping you run straight up walls and over water, as long as you end the turn on solid ground. Admittedly that’s not very in-character, but you’ve got tentacles growing outta ya, I’m sure you can justify it somehow.

16. Monk 10: Tenth level monks have a Purity of Body that makes you immune to poisons and disease.

17. Monk 11: Your final level of monk grants you a Tranquility that makes you harder to hit, effectively giving you the effect of a Sanctuary spell starting and ending on your long rests, though the spell ends early if you directly attack or cast a spell at an enemy. While active, creatures trying to attack you directly have to make a wisdom save. If they fail, they have to choose a new target or waste their action. The DC is 8 + your wisdom modifier + your proficiency bonus.

18. Warlock 7: Seventh level monks get fourth level spells, like Evard’s Black Tentacles. A 20′ square becomes a mass of tentacles (or demon god pillars), forcing a dexterity save against taking bludgeoning damage and get restrained. They can use their action to try and escape the tentacles, otherwise they don’t get a save on their next turn to avoid damage.

You can also use your Gaze of Two Minds to see and hear though a willing humanoid, like, say, your enthralled servants. Great for espionage, or just being a creep in general.

19. Warlock 8: Use your last ASI to max out your Charisma for super strong spells and the most sex appeal you can squeeze into a single servant.

You can also cast Summon Aberration now to give Zepar a bit of breathing room outside of your body. Honestly the poor guy deserves a break.

20. Warlock 9: Ninth level warlocks get fifth level spells, and Dominate Person lets you completely take over a creature’s mind. They have a wisdom save to avoid it, and they can make another every time they take damage, but if you’re forcing them into a really one sided fight, like say, against an agent of the counter force, that’ll be a one hit kill, so you don’t have to worry too much.

You also get one last invocation, and the Grasp of Hadar turns your eldritch blasts into even more hands, so once per turn you can pull a creature hit by the blast 10 feet closer to you. Bet they thought they were real smug waiting on the other side of your tentacle pit, huh?

Pros:

With an AC of 16, tons of mobility, and a wisdom save between you and even getting hit in the first place, you can be tough to attack, giving you a weird sort of tankiness to avoid conflict altogether.

You’re also good at manipulating people, with charms, mind reading, and just good persuasion scores making it easy for you to turn the tide of a conversation in your favor. Also if you’re having trouble with an enemy you can just dominate them and tell them to jump off a cliff, really easy. You won’t even have to fight if you can just inspire a mob to do it for you.

While the biggest part of your defense does come with a caveat, you’re good at indirect combat, which will keep your sanctuary up longer. Sure, you can’t cast spells affecting a creature, but you can always cast a spell now, and have it affect a creature later, the old “I’m just moving my fist and walking forward, if you get hit it’s your own fault” technique. Putting Evard’s Tentacles down between you and enemies, summoning aberrations, and just using On/Off to cause industrial accidents are all ways to get around this restriction and leave you looking clean as a brand new pair of panties.

Cons:

Your dexterity isn’t great, especially for a monk. That’ll make it harder to effectively use your martial techniques later in the game, and it also hampers your AC.

Despite all your defenses and healing, you’re still only rocking a touch over 100 HP, meaning a light sneeze will put you into power word kill territory. Which is, admittedly, still affected by your Tranquility, so it might not be a bad way to trick people into wasting a 9th level spell...

You only get two spells per short rest, that just isn’t enough to manipulate everyone you want to, so you’ll have to learn to pick and choose what happens when.

[kaizokuou-ni-naru]

The Voyage So Far: Whole Cake Island

east blue (1 | 2) || alabasta (1 | 2) || skypiea || water 7 || enies lobby || thriller bark || paramount war (1 | 2) || fishman island || punk hazard || dressrosa (1 | 2) || whole cake island || wano

sanji is such a self-sacrificial idiot. and i know that’s not exactly a ground-breaking statement, but it does define the entire first half of whole cake island, so it may as well be reiterated here: sanji does not value his own life as much as he should, and fails to grasp that other people care about him outside of what he can offer them, which is why he’s so surprised when luffy later comes charging headlong into big mom’s territory.

zou is a really good little arc, and it also mirrors the themes of whole cake island in miniature. the minks collectively make a massive sacrifice and risk absolutely everything to protect raizou, and wci is essentially all about loyalty and sacrifice, whether its sanji giving himself up to protect the strawhats and zeff or luffy and the strawhats facing impossible odds to rescue him to pedro giving up his life to get them all out of there safe.

huge fan of this panel partly just because it’s cute and partly because it’s a great visualization of just how dysfunctional the heights are in one piece.

zou is one of my favorite settings in one piece just for the sheer creativity of it. zunesha is so massive and so mysterious and so strange. and she really looks unspeakably old just from how she’s drawn, looming over everyone and everything, eyes hollow and empty, an entire forest and an entire people growing on her back that have been there for thousands of years. it’s just so neat and so wildly inventive.

this applies to zou as a whole, but i think it’s really cool how all the little threads that will become important during wano are set up so effectively even before whole cake island starts. we get this shot here of kidd beat to shit and then forget it because so much happens between here and when he shows up again in wano, but then oda punks us into caring about him and killer so much and this retroactively becomes very important.

ever since his introduction sanji’s always been a character basically defined by his adherence to his principles: always feeding the hungry, never wasting food, never hurting women, never using his hands in combat. he’s probably the most firmly principled person on the crew, and that’s more obvious in whole cake island than in any other arc except maybe baratie.

sanji is very stubbornly good, which puts him in acute contrast to his siblings and their general cruel apathy. it’s something i really like about him.

i’m a huge fan of big mom’s introduction, which is also our introduction to tottoland in general. it’s cutesy and colorful and musical while simultaneously being deeply creepy, with lyrics about killing people for ingredients and making jam out of blood, which is a great summary of the core of big mom’s character. she’s an old lady all in pink who lives in a cartoon fairy-tale land- but she’s also a deranged cannibal, and all those singing trees and flowers are animated by the life she steals from her citizens as tax.

whole cake island draws on a lot of fairy tale motifs (especially with brulee), and the contrast that saccharine appearance creates with how fucked up the actual content is is super effective and memorable, i think.

honestly i find most of the content of sanji with the vinsmokes just plain upsetting, which i’m sure is intentional, so i’m not going to go into it a lot here, but i am including this panel of him kicking niji in the face.

sad as this scene turns out, luffy’s absolute thrill at finding sanji and the corresponding bafflement of the vinsmokes as to how the fuck he even got there always kinda makes me grin.

i always love seeing people’s underestimations about luffy get thrown right the hell out the window- because let’s be honest, he’s easy to underestimate, he’s like a five and a half foot tall rubber teenager and not very physically intimidating and all, and then he goes and pulls off the impossible without blinking.

the thing that makes luffy unique as a captain has always been his willingness to rely on his crew, and his willingness to openly admit that reliance, like he did all the way back in arlong park. most of the other contenders for the pirate king’s crown we’ve seen- big mom, kaidou, crocodile once upon a time- have been stubbornly individualistic people who explicitly shown not to care for their crew and allies, generally seeing them as disposable.

luffy is the opposite of all of them, because his crew are everything to him, to the point of being willing to sacrifice his dream for them. and the loyalty he wins from them in return is unmatched, as opposed to big mom and kaidou, who both get cheerfully betrayed not just by their own crewmates but by their own children.

brook is really cool in whole cake island, and honestly it comes at just the right time for him as a character. ever since his introductory arc in thriller bark until this point he hasn’t gotten a ton of focus, so it’s great that he gets to be the mvp here and demonstrate exactly why he’s a strawhat pirate and how much he’s grown over the timeskip.

oda is generally really good at introducing and handling characters contained to a single arc/saga, but i do think he absolutely knocked it out of the park with pedro. he has an interesting backstory, compelling motivations, and basically an entire sub-arc ending in his death that never distracts from the main plot, but only ever adds to it.

pedro really feels like a fully realized character who’s had a whole life offscreen, who we just happened to catch at the very end of his story. i think that’s super impressive.

i really love this moment, because for me, this is the moment where whole cake island becomes a tremendous arc, and where the tides begin to turn and the dominoes begin to fall, one after the other. this is sanji hitting absolute rock bottom. the one ray of light he pinned all his hopes on was a lie, and he can’t even light a fucking cigarette.

but one piece is, very often, a story about picking yourself up even when you feel like you can’t.

i think there’s something lovely about how much one piece emphasizes the value of honestly asking for help. luffy waits for nami to ask for help, and for robin to say she wants to live, and for sanji to admit he just wants to go home, and then says, “okay, i’ll make that happen.”

it just makes me so happy how happy the stawhats are to know sanji’s back with them. it reminds me a lot of how they all brush off robin’s thanks after enies lobby. sure, they’re going to have to crash the wedding and confront big mom directly and might all die, but who cares? they’ve got sanji back. i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again, i love how much they love each other.

i think the gangster outfits are super fun, and i love that oda is committed enough to his aesthetics to come up with an excuse to put them all in formalwear. it pays off, they all look extremely snappy.

i know i just said it in the dressrosa posts but i’m reiterating it here because this is my favorite example of it by far: i love when oda does this split-screen thing with his panels. the contrast between the two halves of pudding is so severe and yet they’re so clearly the same person i honestly just find this pair of panels fascinating to look at.

this panel also kind of gets at my favorite thing about pudding as a character, really. i know she’s a little controversial in fandom, but i’ve always found her entertaining (at least post-reveal), especially in the contrast between her unhinged evil side and her genuinely sweet romantic side and her post-wedding tendency to randomly ping-pong between the two.

i just always like reminding people that sanji is fast enough and his observation haki good enough to dodge a surprise attack, while thoroughly distracted, from katakuri.

sanji in this arc tends to get shit from a certain side of fandom for being ‘useless’ since he doesn’t have a big climactic fight despite being the focus of the arc, which i think is thoroughly missing the point. sanji is still plenty capable in combat, as demonstrated both here and later, with chiffon and oven. it just happens that his strength isn’t what saves the day ultimately, because combat ability isn’t everything, which is the entire point of the vinsmoke backstory/subplot. sanji saves the day just by being kind.

i’ll admit big mom’s flashback isn’t one of my favorites, taken in isolation- there are some parts of it that kind of unresolved (at least as of now- i still suspect they’ll be followed up eventually), and in general, although there is a tragedy to it, it doesn’t quite hit the way many of the other more effective flashbacks do. that said, i do think it does a really good job of succinctly explaining why big mom is the way she is in the present: she’s a child who was never told no, who never grew or matured past the disappearance of her adopted mother. that’s it, and that’s enough.

i’ve always been a little bit in love with how seriously and consistently one piece handles its themes of found family, and sanji outright disowning judge in whole cake island is maybe the most outright they ever get: family is found, not made. you owe nothing to your blood and are never beholden to your abusers.

and i just like that a whole lot.

i do think the tamatebako is one of the best uses of chekov’s gun i’ve ever seen. we’re first shown it at the end of fishman island, it’s revealed it got sent off to big mom rigged with explosives which is a minor “oh fuck” moment, and then it gets forgotten about, because the entirety of punk hazard and dressrosa happens in between! which is a lot!

i remember when i reached the moment in whole cake island where we’re reminded that that bomb still exists and is still waiting to explode, i just started laughing hysterically out loud, because i’d completely forgotten, and now that i remembered i was just delighted to know it was going to definitely go off at some point, almost certainly in a very satisfying way.

pedro is, if i remember right, the first time the imagery of the coming dawn that will become quite important in wano really has attention drawn to it in-text- the recurring motif is there before this, of course, dating all the way back to the names of the first chapter (romance dawn) and first island (dawn island), but this is the first time it’s actively addressed in-story.

in doing so, oda essentially presents a fresh mystery for us, but one that has been set up so consistently ever since chapter one that it feels like it fits perfectly into the world and story.

luffy’s been punching way above his weight class ever since crocodile all the way back in alabasta, fighting enemies who clearly outmatch him but always managing to win anyways, but his fight with katakuri is maybe the clearest the sheer differential in strength ever gets, because katakuri’s powers are similar enough to luffy’s that he can pull off pretty much all of luffy’s techniques, but better. so luffy has to fall back on the two things that have always been his greatest strengths, again all the way back to crocodile in alabasta: innovation and sheer fucking stubbornness.

one thing i love about one piece is how no character is immune to being clowned on. absolutely nobody. everybody looks like an idiot sometimes, and it makes everything so much more fun than if the series took itself more seriously. katakuri basically actively tries to avert this by building up a fearsome, flawless, and utterly no-nonsense persona, but it winds up failing hard because it actually only makes the contrast and surprise of his actual personality and vices that much funnier.

i’ve always loved this one panel of carrot going sulong, because she just looks so monstrous, like a true werewolf. the same goes for the shift in big mom’s design when she starts going truly mad with starvation and gets even more threatening-looking (below). i just think oda should let women be monstrously scary more often.

i do really love that the entire climax of whole cake island hinges on the degree of trust and faith the strawhats, and sanji and luffy specifically, have in each other. they’re all facing massive challenges that would seem insurmountable to an outsider- luffy facing down a yonkou’s commander with a bounty of over a billion and sanji remaking a massive cake that took months to plan and make in just a few hours, the others evading big mom’s full forces and big mom herself for a full night- but none of them have even a shred of doubt that the others can manage it.

i wrote a meta post awhile back about one piece’s concept of ‘honor in a pirates’ fight, and what it came down to is this: honor can never be expected between pirates, but the best of them will show it anyways, and it can be a very telling judge of character. nobody would expect katakuri to do this, and luffy even calls him an idiot for it, but he has enough respect for luffy as a strong opponent to do it anyways, and that’s how we know for absolute certain that even though he’s an antagonist, he’s also a good, honorable person.

i really like the gesture of luffy leaving his hat over katakuri’s mouth, especially because until this point, we’re never even given any indication that he’s really noticed it, let alone that katakuri is insecure about it. he never reacts to or comments on it (which is in itself kind of unusual from someone who tends to nickname opponents by their appearances as often as luffy does) one way or another.

and then he does this, confirming all at once that he did fully notice and understand, he just doesn’t care. which i think sums up one of the more under-appreciated aspects of luffy’s character- he’s generally way more observant than people give him credit for, especially when it comes to people, it’s just that he has a very different sense of what’s important and what’s not than your average person.

i love the sheer contrast between big mom’s delighted, rapturous singing as she devours the wedding cake against the violence taking place on screen as her army rains fire and hell down on the thousand sunny. it parallels her initial introduction at the start of the arc perfectly, and is just an excellent way to close out the arc with a bang.

i said it earlier but it bears repeating here, for a different reason: luffy is not very physically intimidating. he’s shorter than most of the other main characters, he’s a lanky teenager, he dresses casually and his most identifiable accessory is a farm hat.

but then there are times when he looks like a captain, like a future pirate king, and it just looks so natural on him. i can never get over it.

i really like that, after spending a whole arc demonstrating just how different (and how much better) sanji is than the vinsmokes, it ends like this- showing us just how similar he’s grown up to the man he’s chosen as his real family, and just how proud zeff would be of him.

[askthekuvaqbrothers]

Seagull giving Rufus hell over wrecking sth. and the brothers (and Hermes) reacting to that. Your choice if you make it angsty, mischievous or hurt/comforty

(TW: Blood, Injury, Child Abuse (Seagull is a bad human))

“Now, this is going to the mayor-”

“I'll take it!!"

Rufus leapt from his seat, dashing and jumping for the box that was much too high to reach.

“Now Rufus, this is fragile, so I don't think-"

“Pleeaaaase! I promise to be careful! Promise promise!"

Cletus swung his legs, absently patting Poisonous, “Why do you really want to go?"

“I wanna go see the Mayor! He's a big important guy who found clean water and made all of Kuvaq! Dad says we should be thankful to him for giving us a home, and I bet he has all sorts of neat stuff in his house.”

“And there it is, stuff.” Cletus rolled his eyes at his brother’s kleptomaniac tendencies, but Rufus seemed undeterred.

“Pleeeeeeese!”

Hermes stared down into those pleading eyes and felt himself melt. He knew he’d gotten soft after building the prototypes, but playing the role of Father to these three had been swaying his objective views to subjective ones.

“Alright, but be careful.”

He rested the item in Rufus’ hands, not letting go until he was sure the boy had a secure hold on it. Rufus grinned up at him, and with a small skip in his step, hurried out the door. Neither Cletus nor Argus spared a look, but Hermes' gaze lingered after.

“…Could you two please follow after him? I worry-”

Cletus sighed, “That's all he brings-"

Argus snagged his brothers’ sleeve, fixing him with a ‘don’t start’ look.

“We'll go.”

With an audible groan, Cletus let himself be dragged out the door. The two didn’t have to travel far to catch up with Rufus, who had quickly given up on the more energetic movement, and was now slowly strolling across town, twisting his delivery in hand.

“If you break it, Dad won’t trust you with anything anymore.”

Startled, he almost dropped it, but managed to resecure his grasp and glare over his shoulder.

“Why are you here?”

“Dad sent us to keep an eye on you because, you know...” Cletus made a general gesture to his hazardous brother, though Rufus didn’t look to understand.

“He doesn’t trust you.”

Argus’ blunt words got through faster, and now Rufus chose to get upset.

“Why would he not trust me?! I’m SUPER trustworthy!”

There was an intake of air from Cletus, which was quickly stopped by an elbow to his ribs. Choosing the option of least argument, Argus pushed Rufus and dragged Cletus along, following the most direct path to the mayor’s private residence. It was a separate building behind the Town Hall, though almost equally large, apparently filled with belongings that didn’t fit in his office. A steep ramp angled up to the front door, where Rufus stopped their parade at the bottom. He turned to his brothers, and pointed to the ground.

“Wait here.”

“What? After coming all this way?!”

“Yes, Dad put me in charge of this, and I don’t want you messing things up.”

“Me-?!”

Cletus got a hand over his mouth, while Argus’ other hand waved Rufus on.

“Yeah yeah, hurry up.”

With a wide smile Rufus dashed up the ramp, knocking on the mayor’s front door. After a moment, it was opened by the mayor’s secretary Plovera.

“Delivery for Mr Mayor!”

The lean woman stared down, expression entirely blank, save for the eventual twitch in her eyebrow.

“Oh, please come in. The mayor won't be long.” She ushered the boy inside, “Please refrain from touching anything. You may wait on the chair over there.”

She pointed to a lone chair next to a statue of a large, furry beast. As Rufus wandered in, completely distracted by everything before him, Plovera closed the door behind them.

-------------------------------------

Time was passing slowly without their whirlwind of a brother around.

Argus kicked at the dust and Cletus plucked at a loose thread on Poisonous, neither particularly focused. Due to the heavy metal sheets that built up the walls, they hadn’t heard anything from inside, though normally not even the laws of nature could prevent the sound of Rufus’ destructive force. Cletus opened his mouth to suggest they wait in the comfort of their own home rather than the filthy outside-

There was a ground shaking THUD, ringing through the metal behind them. The two shared a look at finally hearing a typical Rufus caused noise, though the sound of someone else shouting was growing louder too.

As Argus and Cletus turned towards the mayor's dwelling, the door flew open, and the body of their brother came tumbling down the ramp, stopping as an unceremonious heap just past the end.

“YOU INFERNAL LITTER BUG!”

The booming voice of Mayor Seagull called out as he stormed down toward the boys, furry in his face and posture, and a sudden burst of flames licking at his heels from the building behind. Both Argus and Cletus recoiled at the unbridled rage he radiated, stepping back in time with his own steps forward. When their heels collided with Rufus’ twisted limbs, they both snapped out of their trance.

Argus turned enough to check his red-haired brother, carefully making out the shaky rise and fall of his chest. Alive- good, but hurt, the sight of blood and fast forming bruises triggering something in his mind. He glanced up to check on Cletus, but his green-haired brother was already gone, so his attention returned to Seagull. Something deeply ingrained in his core was telling him how to act, reminding him of the two things he’d always been aware of;

Directive One: Protect and Serve Elysium(?) Hermes.

Directive Two: Protect and Serve the Organon(?) his brothers.

At this moment, with his brother lying still, Directive Two was compromised, so counter action was called for. Argus knelt and plunged his hand off the side of the walkway, clenching a fist around the first thing it touched, wrenching a piece of metal free from the rest of the junk. It was rough edged and not very long, cutting into his own hand, but it classified him as armed and that was all he needed to run at Seagull. The man seemed to startle at the intended attack, but quickly recovered and stepped aside, easily avoiding the boy’s short reach.

They both turned back to face each other, and Argus charged again. The large man was ready for him this time, kicking as he came into reach, foot colliding with the boys’ upper arm and sending him flying.

“The INSOLENCE, the AUDACITY! Has no one taught you MANNERS, BOY?”

Argus picked himself up, adjusted his grip, and charged again. Seagull didn’t move this time, grabbing the arm with the weapon when it came in reach, holding it out to the side as he glowered down at the struggling child.

"Pay attention when your elders are talking, boy.” He twisted the limb enough to make him drop the improvised weapon, “I should have recognised from the start that your family was more trouble than it’s worth. Nothing but discarded scrap!”

He had nothing to say to the man, and his wriggling failed to loosen the grip, so instead Argus curled himself in on Seagull’s arm. He dug his free fingers into the soft joints of the trapping hand and wrapped his teeth around the largest soft space, earning him release and a shout of pain. In the free moment, Argus retrieved his weapon and swung it with all his strength into Seagull’s thigh, breaking through fabric and skin.

“YOU MONGREL!”

Seagull swung downwards, fist colliding with Argus’ brow. Skin split and flecks of blood flew, but Argus caught himself before he completely dropped, glaring up through the haze of red slipping into his eye. Seagull pulled back and moved to swing a kick, but found a weight around his ankle.

Looking down, Rufus was awkwardly wrapped around the mayors’ leg, uselessly biting into his pants. With a growl of frustration, Seagull added enough power to swing the boy along with his leg, colliding brother with brother to send them both tumbling away. When they came to a rest, Argus forced his clear eye to open, only to see the mayor swiftly approaching again. From his position sprawled over his chest, Rufus coughed, showering Argus’ arm in red flecks.

Seagull was towering over them again.

Metal piece still in hand, Argus threw it at the man’s head, hoping for the throat or an eye, but only managing to catch him in the cheek. In response, with a loud growl, the man drew a leg up and brought it down on the two of them, drawing out a strangled noise as the air was knocked from their lungs.

“What is going on here?!”

Hermes and Gizmo arrived on the scene, with Cletus closely trailing behind. Both men looked shocked at the sight before them, with Hermes paling when his eyes fell upon his bloodied sons. Gizmo hesitated in the moment, but when Seagull went to swing at the downed children again, he flicked to law enforcement mode and stepped in to restrain him.

“Stop! This is excessive force!”

Seagull writhed in the hold, pointing towards Rufus, “This is self-defence! That one almost killed me!”

Gizmo did spare a look between the child and the flames still flickering in the building, but he remained firm in his first choice.

“Hermes, take your boys to my clinic and do what you can while I secure the mayor.”

He snapped out of his shock, “R-right, of course.”

He quickly moved in, stooping down to pick up the worryingly still Rufus. Cletus moved with him and offered a hand to Argus with controlled reluctance, lifting his brother to his feet. Hermes spared one look up into the face of the man who had once offered shelter and work to a complete stranger, before the hateful glare became too much. He stood without further delay and headed directly to the ever-familiar clinic.

------------------------------------------------------

Hermes fumbled with a roll of bandages, muttering under his breath as he failed to untangle the length. There was a shake in his arms, and his old heart felt as though it would give out if it continued to beat at its current rate. He couldn’t get that angered face to leave his mind, and it was dredging up memories he’d longed to forget.

“Dad?”

He was doubting everything again, all his life choices he’d made to this point. He was trying to do better, trying to do what he could to better the lives of those around him, but still he couldn’t find a solution to make everyone happy. If he couldn’t even help this settlement, how could he find a new solution to save both Elysium and Deponia-?

“Dad…”

A small hand laid atop of his own. Hermes stopped fiddling, raising his gaze to Argus. He was sitting on the edge of the examination table, eye swollen closed with blood still dribbling down to stain his now torn shirt. Despite his injuries, his expression remained determined, and his posture was taught, ready for another fight.

“…I don’t believe it’s safe here.”

“What tipped you off?”

Cletus was seated on the floor by the clinic's entrance, similarly ridged with Poisonous in a death grip. His eyes flicked wildly anytime there was a noise.

“It’s okay now, Gizmo is handling the mayor. We’re fine.”

Neither of the boys relaxed. Seeing them like this truly reminded him what they were: children in form, but programmed soldiers, made to serve their purpose to the death. It had been wishful thinking they would break their instilled nature with a bit of civilian life. He rolled the ball of fabric in hand, and it unravelled.

“To remain would be too great of a risk.”

“And where do you suggest we go? Find a hole somewhere?”

They spoke around him. Standard Organon would follow procedure and upper command, but these three had more free thought that conflicted with each other, letting them discuss and plan. He carefully began wrapping Argus’ head, the boy ignoring the action.

“There are other settlements.”

“That are very, very far away. And could potentially be worse than here.”

“A potential threat is better than an imminent threat.”

“A hundred potential threats are MUCH worse than one manageable threat. Besides, you haven’t really proven yourself capable of even defending one little idiot from a threat.”

As Hermes tied off the bandage Argus dropped his head, glancing back at Rufus who was lying behind him. His external injuries were covered, but he was still breathing shallowly. They had to wait for Gizmo before they could find out what internal damage there really was.

“…”

After checking the damage to his boys, Hermes understood what they were talking about. He’d put trust in Seagull, and ignored the man’s shortcomings over the generosity of a home and job, but he knew deep down there would be no forgiveness from the mayor. He would now be a constant antagonist in their lives should the grudge hold, and they’d have to watch their step at every point in town. Perhaps it really was time for them to move on. The only settlements he knew were close to Ascension stations, and therefore Organon bases, but maybe this was a sign he should return and try to convince Ulysses and the Elders once more. The only problem would be what would become of the three-

Rufus groaned, which suddenly became coughing as he stirred. Argus spun to inch closer to his brother, putting his hands down to stop him from trying to sit up. Hermes did similar, though he chose to rest a hand on his head, avoiding the suspected broken bones and bruised organs.

“Shh, it’s okay. Just stay there, don’t move. We’re here.”

The coughing continued, and when he managed to turn his head a trail of spit and blood ran from the corner of his mouth. Hermes grabbed a rag to wipe it away, waiting as seconds ticked by before the coughing subsided into shaky breaths. Argus remained still watching closely, and to Hermes' surprise, Cletus was now standing by the bed too. Finally, Rufus managed to open an eye.

“… ‘s wr-ng ..ur face?”

Cletus snorted, though his shoulders relaxed a little, “Should I fetch a mirror?”

Argus made a shooing motion, but kept his eyes fixed on Rufus, “Can you tell us where you’re hurt?”

Lips twisting into a slight pout, Rufus subjected his family to an agonizingly slow blink, long enough that Hermes almost considered shaking him to check if he was still conscious. Once they were open again, his gaze fell somewhere in the distance.

“…’vrywher-?”

“Very helpful.”

Hermes allowed himself a small smile, glad to hear his son's banter again, but his nerves were still running his heart. They were made to be hardy, but internal injuries were still a potentially fatal thing, and Gizmo was taking longer than he’d hoped. He patted Argus on the shoulder.

“Don’t let him fall unconscious again, best to try to keep him talking. I’m going to find Gizmo.”

Before he could turn a hand grabbed the sleeve of his shirt, while another balled around his trouser leg. The looks of concern he got were both heart-warming and eerie, with even Rufus managing to swing his eyes over. They were probably worried about him coming across Seagull.

“Please, it’s okay to worry about yourselves, I’ll be fine.”

Their looks continued, tiny fists grounding him on the spot. The longer he looked, the more their wide eyes shimmered, flicking to each sibling briefly, and after a long moment it began to dawn that he was wrong.

They were worried about themselves, about each other.

And they were looking to him for guidance, for reassurance as a figure of authority- no, as their guardian.

He’d thought he’d gone soft and was playing the father role well, but it was now clear that wasn’t true. He’d still been Hermes the Engineer this whole time, trying to do his old work in a new environment, still hung up on his past failures, still seeing his creations as things when right now it was clear that they were children; hurt, scared, unsure and looking to the one person who had always been there for them.

He had to realise that he wasn't responsible for the world’s problems; he had his own little world right in front of him.

And he needed to make them his priority right now.

He needed to be their father, first and foremost.

[writing-in-april]

Shining Bright Above You

Spencer Reid x Male Reader

Summary: Spencer finally gets to go out with his boyfriend after getting out of prison and gets to see the light despite the overwhelming darkness.

A/N: Hey guys! This is my twenty-first fic for my 30 fics in 30 days for April. This ones one of my favorites I’ve ever written and is based on this request and is also inspired by some stuff @ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff sent to me for inspiration. I know x male reader fics don’t do good in fandom (which is a crying shame) but there’s still a large portion of people it applies to that read fanfic so please share it around so it might reach them!! Inclusivity in fanfic is important and I’ve heard multiple people get very discouraged they don’t see more fics that represent them- so please help bring more inclusivity in fandom!!! My ask box is open for nice anons only- here- if I see a shred of homophobia I will curb stomp you (I will not have a debate about it in my inbox) BUT please don’t be afraid to point out if I made a mistake in terms of the gender of the reader (this is not an open invitation to critique the rest of the fic)Thanks for reading and hope y’all enjoy!

Warnings: Mentions of homophobia & the prison arc & subtle hints at a soulmate au (which is funny I wrote it like that because I don’t read soulmate fics lol)- otherwise its super fluffy 🥰

Main Masterlist Word Count: 1.6k

Time was just a construct created by humans to understand how we moved forward in the universe, and even though I was exaggerating it had felt like a million years since I had been out with Spencer. Prison had already made it hard to see him, with all the pat downs and checks only to still be separated by a plexiglass wall. On top of that, Spencer had only let me visit once, until he saw eyes leering at me with some uttering slurs underneath their breath.

It wasn’t until he was freed that I could see him again, and in the flesh as well. I remember our first hug after he had been released, both of us practically soaking our clothes with tears that didn’t seem to stop. For Spencer, it had even taken along time to convince him that I was real, and that I was safe- there would be no homophobic prisoners coming to attack us in the night.

Spencer didn’t like the night, one of his worst fears was the darkness and night was when the shadowy parts of his mind came out to play. Oftentimes I’d find him in other parts of the apartment at night, with all the lights on, the bed was no longer a place of comfort. One night I had pulled him to the couch, lights all flicked on and a nature documentary playing softly. When I had brought his head into my lap to stroke his fluffy locks that were still beautiful even though they were still damaged from the prison soap, he had fallen asleep a lot easier. Since then the couch has become our bed. Though I did not mind because he kicked and cried less in the night, and even when he did, it was easier to hold him.

The night was a scary place for Spencer, except when the stars shone bright. That’s why when I had remembered one of our favorite past dates, at the observatory, I immediately called in a favor. We had the place to ourselves tonight, sure it cost me more money than I’d ever spent before on a date. It had been ages, a million years it seemed like since we went out in public, so the price was worth it. It was all for Spencer, to make the night good for him again.

Though I definitely loved looking at the bright balls of gas up above I much preferred to rest my gaze on Spencer’s eyes. Spencer’s eyes often reminded me of the stars, not because of their color- but because of the slight twinkle that they got every time he was happy. The twinkle in my opinion rivaled the brightness of the stars with ease.

Normally I could listen to Spencer rambling on about facts all day, being completely entranced by his phrasing. But, his eyes had entranced me this time. I was no longer thinking about the black holes that he was rambling about, but how lucky I was. How lucky I was to see that twinkle in his eye and get to kiss him at the same time?

I could’ve been born at any point throughout space and time, to see any number of amazing things across the universe. But, I was put here standing next to Spencer. Just two specks of stardust ready to be in this world together. However insignificant life could seem in the grander scheme of things- however small we could both seem, I wouldn’t want to be next to any other speck of stardust nor be placed at any point in space and time.

“And no particles or even electromagnetic radiation such as light—can escape from it.” I caught the last part of what he said as he finished his mini rant about black holes. Thinking about light being swallowed up and being crushed into oblivion it made me think of Spencer again, it was a sad thought, though it was filled with hope.

I thought about all the darkness that had tried to consume Spencer throughout the years. Most recently prison had been the thing that tried to stomp the light out of him. It was nice to see that light that had dimmed sparkle a little brighter tonight. Even though we have been dating for a long time I felt myself filled with a small amount of happiness knowing that I was at least part of the reason the sparkle in his eye was bright tonight.

“You ok?” Spencer piped up, looking at me with concern.

“The stars are bright tonight.”

He looked a little confused at my seemingly somewhat random statement, he still looked back up at the stars. On the inside I wished he’d kept his bright glinting gaze upon me, then he confirmed my statement, “Yes, yes they are.”

“You’re still shining brighter.” Even after all this time I still had the capabilities to make Spencer blush. Every time he did so I was reminded of the stuttering boy I had met all those years ago. When he had first approached me in the library so long ago to ask me if I was finished with a book I had set down to the side, he was instantly just as endearing to me as he is now.

It had been such a different time then, it seemed almost like another lifetime. We had been through so much together, I often thought the universe might have some vendetta against us. Though logically the universe wouldn’t be so concerned with two small specks of stardust such as ourselves. Either way, whatever was truly out there in the unknown, there’s no place I’d rather be.

A piece of paper, folded carefully so the creases would be neat, was burning a hole through my slacks. It was a small gift in the grander scheme of things, a blip on anyone else’s radar. This held more meaning for us than just some novelty gift people buy.

His eyes were back on the stars, observing them with such intensity that I hadn’t even seen the astronomer Spencer had introduced me to last time we were here. Spence craved the light above him- who was I to deny him if I could give it to him?

It may have not been plucking the stars out of the sky for him to cuddle in his arms in a literal sense. I couldn’t buy all the stars in the sky, the website didn’t allow that. I could give him one though, one that was brighter than any others they had for sale.

“I-I have something for you.” I stuttered, which had Spencer looking at me with suspicion; he was the stutterer when nervous, not normally me.

Spencer’s eyes were on me now, not the stars, though he looked at me with the same reverence as he did when gazing up at the Milky Way. The same way I always did.

My hands were shaky when I pulled out the folded paper, carefully undoing the creases to present him the certificate of ownership for a star. Spencer steadied them with his fingers wrapping around my wrists. They were long and spindly, just made in a certain way that made me always want to kiss the tips of them as I did so often.

He then took the paper from my hands, even though I wanted to be greedy and take the warmth from his hands that the paper was stealing. I cleared my throat before telling him what the folded paper was, still nervous over a simple sheet of paper,“It’s our star.”

Somehow his eyes gleamed ever brighter because of how the tears that were now welling up in his eyes refracted the light even more. He wiped them a little, so he could scan the paper over to read the certificate that to most people meant nothing.

“It’s so we can have a little bit more light in our life.” I chewed on my bottom lip after I finished giving him my reasoning for the gift, nervous about his reaction. His hands were shaking now, as were mine, though for different reasons.

If my brain was thinking logically I’d realize he’d love anything I have to him, he’d probably even treasure a vial of sand. “You’re all the light I need” He then pulled me into his lips by grasping at my cheeks, the paper still in his hands brushing up against them accidentally. The only people here to see the light between us was a mingling curious janitor. It didn’t matter who was watching, I only needed one person to be here, Spencer. And, every time I was in his presence I always stopped to think, there’s no place I’d rather be. There’s no one else I’d rather be attached to, no one else I want to call me their boyfriend. He’s my home and my light just as much as I am his.

There’s an old Buddhist saying that, when you meet your soulmate, remember that the act to bring you together was 500 years in the making. So always appreciate and be kind to one another. I don’t know how much I put stock in the idea of soulmates, or the universe having some illogical vendetta against us, or the possibility of a being greater than humankind. I did know however, that if there was anyone in the world that I could possibly be soulmates with, it would be Spencer Reid. I’d spend the rest of my days comforting him from the darkness, happily showing him the specks of light in between that ultimately would defeat the swirling pools of black.

Ask Me Anything

—-

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All Works: @shotarosleftpinky @oreogutz @90spumkin @kyra-morningstar @spenxerslut @boxofsparklingmuses @katexrichardson @takeyourleap-of-faith

All MGG characters: @muffin-cup @willowrose99 @princesssmooshie @peterpanouat @anaagraceeberr @ashcakes1918 @reid-me-a-story @cosmic-psychickitty

Spencer Reid/CM: @calm-and-doctor @destiny-tsukino @safertokiss @slutforthegubes @onlyhereforthefanfics @jareauswifey @princesssmooshie @peterpanouat

[birdkujapropaganda]

my completely biased and official rating of every keyblade ever:

Kingdom Key: absolute classic. excellent design for the like, mascot keyblade. very simple, vaguely key shaped. i hate the mouse head though it's so stupid and makes no sense. and i hate mickey. 9/10 minus a point for the weird mickey keychain

Oathkeeper: wonderful. amazing. never boring. excellent design love the heart and wings and all the significance. and that the keychain is kairi's charm? terrific. 10/10

Oblivion: brilliant. awesome. phenomenal. again excellent design the wings and chains and purple crystal are absolutely perfect. love the crown keychain. 10/10

Ultima Weapon 1: literally just a sword with some filigree on it. nice. too much yellow and i don't like the weird cyan gradient on the guard. 7/10

Kingdom Key D: d for disgusting. i don't have any other comments i just hate it. 2/10

Keyblade of Hearts: yeah that sure is an anti-keyblade. love the simplicity and the heart in the negative space of the teeth. and that it doesn't have a keychain, that fueled a lot of theories for 12yo me 8/10

Lady Luck: i think i don't like this one bc to get it u need to use a white trinity but you can't do that until near the end and i have way cooler blades to use. the design is pretty ok, don't really get the card keychain tho. 5/10

Olympia: oh the sight of this one makes me irritated because the kh1 strategy guide uses this in one of the pictures for the fight against possessed riku. it did not help me win. and i hate short keyblades. love the clouds and columns though 7/10

Jungle King: kinda ugly but i appreciate that it looks kinda handmade. also like the butterfly keychain bc it doesn't look like it fits but it Does. also the first good alternate blade u get in the game so. 8/10

Three Wishes: not bad but it doesn't stick out to me either. also doesn't scream agrabah to me but also it does? 6/10

Pumpkinhead: NICE. very long and very cool. the teeth looks like bat wings and a pumpkin so very epic. 9/10

Wishing Star: so pointless i already have pumpkinhead. also short. cute design though i like the gears. 5/10

Crab Claw: i never used this one because it stuck out so ugly in Halloween Town </3 i love blue and crabs though so 8/10

Fairy Harp: I HATE YOU DIE. short and stupid. does NOT remind me of neverland at all. 1/10

Divine Rose: pretty nice but short and lategame. always thought its existence was kinda weird?? like thanks belle but why. i have oblivion. 7/10

Spellbinder: for some reason i really don't like it. i like blue and the circles are neat. the handle looks really painful though. 4/10

Metal Chocobo: kinda ugly lol. love the holes and chocobo keychain. 8/10

Lionheart: oh i am so biased by recoded. absolutely excellent keyblade. design's kind of weird tho where are those lions going. 9/10

Diamond Dust: so i was really confused because i thought this was khux-only or maybe bbs keyblade but apparently it's kh1 final mix only. you know what i got as a reward for fighting the ice titan? sephiroth. you know what i got for fighting sephiroth? NOTHING. it was my favorite khux blade though so grrrr 7/10

One-Winged Angel: grr bark bark final mix again fuck you. kinda weird design though like what is the teeth? a meteor? should've been a wing. nice guard though there's not enough hand room. excellent keychain obviously. 8/10

Ultima Weapon 2: very similar to the first but blue and symmetrical. very good learn from your mistakes. 9/10

Way to Dawn: YEAAAHHHHHHH BOY HERE IT IS PERFECT EXCELLENT GREAT DESIGN WONDERFUL LORE. HAS WINGS. THE EVOLUTION FROM SOUL EATER. THE LACK OF THORNS ON THE HEART. 10/10

Destiny's Embrace: very cute!! my favorite part is the name. i wish it wasn't so like. stereotypically girly though. like you look at the destiny trio's keyblades and can immediately pick out which one is The Girl's. 9/10

Star Seeker: i wanna hate it because it's mickey's/yen sid's but honestly it's so nice. the stars and moons and comets and gradients and colors... wonderful 9/10

Rumbling Rose: oof. weird and ugly and gross. keychain looks like a ladybug from far away. 3/10

Hero's Crest: bring the clouds back. i don't really get the design but i like columns. 5/10

Monochrome: super cute!! i don't like Timeless River but this fits it so well and has cute hit effect. 8/10

Mysterious Abyss: i always get this one way late in the game so it's always pretty pointless oops lol. also the design doesn't really say atlantica?? 3/10

Follow the Wind: another weird miss but i like this one more. nice wheel shaped guard, and that the keychain is a cursed coin. 6/10

Wishing Lamp: now THIS is the agrabah keyblade. very nice and elegant. looks like the palace! 7/10

Decisive Pumpkin: THIS ONE 😭😭 it's so ugly but it's so strong so i have to use it but it's so ugly. it does look like jack's idea of christmas so points i guess 😭 4/10

Circle of Life: also pretty ugly. and short. sorry simba. 3/10

Sweet Memories: shrek voice it doesn't even have attack. i don't like winnie the pooh so that's definitely influencing me. makes cute noises iirc and looks pretty cute. 4/10

Photon Debugger: this one should look pretty cool but my brain is saying it's bad. i think the giant red ball by the teeth are throwing me off. love the neon blue tho 5/10

Gull Wing: why the weird space in the name. anyway. i really want to love this keyblade bc i love X2 but it's really bad. i'm so sorry YRP kh did you so wrong. excellent keychain choice though. 2/10

Guardian's Soul: MUCH better thank you. auron my beloved <3 the lines are very appealing and i like how simple it appears. also looks like auron's swords. 8/10

Sleeping Lion: wayyy better than lionheart. looks kinda like a gunblade! again though what are those lions doing. 8/10

Fenrir: my car key got in a fight. 1/10

Bond of Flame: looks like a bad first draft of axel's keyblade. either the teeth or the guard should look like a chakram, pick one. love it though. 7/10

Two Become One: MY BELOVED <3 excellent design, so so so roxas i think he should use it. very excellent i love the little twist at the top. checkered handle is a little weird. 10/10

Fatal Crest: lol i was so mad when i first saw this because it looked like one of my oc's keyblades. i like it now though, it's a dragon!! pretty neat bro 8/10

Winner's Proof: oh this one is so cute. if it wasn't a reward it would be really weird and bad. surprisingly elegant! and there's even 13 mushrooms on it! 9/10

(shoutout to portadorx on deviantart for the 358 keyblade refs)

Missing Ache: YOU. interesting design, though it says roxas more than ventus to me. great first alt keyblade. 7/10

Ominous Blight: very edgy names in this game <3 looks like guardian's soul, which is interesting. i don't like yellow but it works bc blight 6/10

Abaddon Plasma: what a cool fucking name. so many yellow keyblades. but very cool looking i love roxas' aesthetic 8/10

Pain of Solitude: this is just pink missing ache. 8/10

Sign of Innocence: SO COOL. idk what's going on in most of these blades but i love it. 9/10

Crown of Guilt: come on. it doesn't look like a crown. big disappointment. very cool though 6/10

Abyssal Tide: so cool!! i love blue and fighting in midair <3 the teeth kinda looks like waves 8/10

Leviathan: weirdly furry looking. very cool guard 6/10

True Light's Flight: looks like two become one if it was only one. the top kinda looks like the nobody sigil 9/10

Rejection of Fate: SPEAR. epic name too, but i think it should swap names with true light's flight. very cool but i don't remember seeing it in name. kinda awkward bc it looks like it should be a spear 7/10

Midnight Roar: sooo cool. the orange handle pops without looking wrong... nice. also the teeth kinda look like a bat. 9/10

Glimpse of Darkness: ugly. weirdly bulky and hollow. short. 3/10

Total Eclipse: weirdly bumpy sword. i like how the orange looks like it glows. 5/10

Silent Dirge: GoD but purple. 2/10

Lunar Eclipse: TE but purple. 4/10

Darker than Dark: Hello 😳TLF but purple 10/10

Astral Blast: Abyssal Tide but yellow. interesting choice, but kinda clashes with the blue accents 7/10

Maverick Flare: Ominous Blight but red... excellent. very nice. 8/10

Twilight Blaze: Abaddon Plasma but red... also excellent. very epic. 9/10

Omega Weapon: props for not looking like any of the ultima weapons. very interesting and spiky but i kinda don't like it. 6/10

Aubade: kinda weird. "draws forth its wielder's personality"... ok. looks light elemented. 7/10

Wooden Stick: lol 10/10

Umbrella: not what i would've chosen but lol 10/10

Zero/One: WONDERFUL, EXCELLENT, AMAZING. i can't really explain why i love this one so much it's just very good. 10/10

Earthshaker: very solid design. not much to say it's just nice. love the colored guard. 7/10

Ends of the Earth: love that it is so clearly an earthshake upgrade. makes u realize how incomplete the first one is. 9/10

Dreadgnaw: kinda silly looking lol those are teeth. love the red bit in the center. looks very similar to earthshaker in a good way. 8/10

Chaos Ripper: looks like EotE but in a bad way. i don't like the weird teeth. it's also almost impractically long but i'm here for that. ALSO THE EYE. NICE. 7/10

Rainfell: oooo i love this it's so simple but so nice. very elegant 9/10

Stormfall: less nice. looks like a rainfell upgrade though. also kinda looks like master's defender which makes sense but i don't like it. 6/10

Brightcrest: GORGEOUS. PERFECT AND WONDERFUL. SO PRETTY. i wish it was kairi's. kinda looks to ornamental for aqua? but good for her. 10/10

Wayward Wind: none of ventus' blades look very ventusy to me. this one looks like an extra training one they had sitting around. cool shape though 5/10

Frolic Flame: NICE. looks like lea's frisbees! i like fire and fire designs so but it's a little awkward looking 8/10

Lost Memory: ok so first off WINGS. EXCELLENT. love that the only color is the heart. very cool and epic but i don't understand why it doesn't have a reverse grip handle. or the pointy bit at the tip. but still 10/10

Void Gear: hiii vanitas :) so anyway in my totally unbiased opinion this is the best keyblade ever obviously. love the gears and red accents and it's just super cool. the eyes and chains... vanitas character development keyblade when <3 10/10

Void Gear (White?): still very cool, love the simple contrast going on. 10/10

No Name: i didn't know this one was also called no name which is kinda lame. but i love the keyblade it's very cool. super glowy and i love the time design. 9/10

Crown Unlimit: I almost really like this one. very neat design, love the crowns and twists and glow. 7/10

Master's Defender: literally so plain and boring. i don't care if that's the point give it some frills. nice design though :/ 7/10

Broken Xblade: love the broken bits and the weird rust color. wish one of the kingdom keys was more broken and i think the top bit should be broken too. 7/10

Wooden Keyblade: sobbing and crying and tears. this is literally so cute and good and i love that it looks like Ends of the earth. or the kingdom key i guess. 10/10

Treasure Trove: i never expect to like this one but it's actually pretty nice :) wish the gems looked like they were spilling from the top and not leaking from the bottom. 8/10

Stroke of Midnight: also surprisingly nice! the guard kinda looks like a pumpkin which is cute. just a very cute design. 8/10

Fairy Stars: rad as hell. absolutely love this design very appealing. like how point the stars are. 9/10

Victory Line: i hate this one. maybe bc i don't like the world. kinda ugly and the teeth look awkward. 3/10

Mark of a Hero: ok we brought the clouds back but the weirdly buff trophy arm fucks this up. the blade is also just kind of a column, nothing going on there. 4/10

Hyperdrive: super cute!! love how the blade looks like laser fire and engine streams. the teeth are weird again though, and the handle looks like a bee 8/10

Pixie Petal: SO much better than fairy harp. this one is very cute and these teeth actually fit with the rest of the design. kinda short though >:/ 7/10

Sweetstack: oh this is so cute. a bunch of ice cream scoops!! why are the teeth oranges and what are some of those flavors. why are cones on the guard soft serve. 8/10

Ultima Weapon bbs: NICE. A SWORD WITH SOME FILIGREE BUT ALL IN BLUE. LOVE the wayfinders on it, very good for them. wish it wasn't just blue since it seems so aqua-centric but it looks nice soo 10/10

Skull Noise: LITERALLY SO PERFECT. THAT'S SO TWEWY. INCREDIBLE. the headphones and mr mew keychain... wonderful. only thing is that the name is kinda weird. like it makes sense but sounds weird. 10/10

Guardian Bell: i like it more than i think i would. elegant looking, and i love the gargoyles on it. hate the sentient gargoyles tho. 8/10

Dual Disk: VERY cool! looks like it has a reverse grip. the teeth are really cool and i love the bright blue. 9/10

Ferris Gear: eh. pretty cute but i think my pinocchio bias is acting up. the gears are nice, reminds me of wishing star. 5/10

Knockout Punch: SO COOL. really love the spikiness and colors and that the guard looks like the monkey. unfortunately for it, i don't like monkey. 8/10

All for One: the design's nice and it matches the world... but eh. 5/10

Counterpoint: so fun!! the violin guard is great, and the blade looks so cool. the teeth are a little awkward looking, it goes up too much. 9/10

Divewing: RAD!. just a sword with a heart on it and i love it. just so fucking cool. and the guard looks like a wing so 10/10

Sweet Dreams: so cute :) in love with the meow wow on top, but the teeth go up too much again. and i think there should be some komory wings on it. 7/10

Ultima Weapon DDD: NICE. almost identical to the kh1 blade, but blue and BETTER. the wings above the guard and the crown coming out of dream eater sigil... brilliant. 10/10

Unbound: not a hit 💔 just kinda weird and unfinished looking? and the lime green bit is off-putting. the hear at the top is nice. 2/10

End of Pain: ok mood shift hello. looks like it should be one of terra's evil blades. at first i was thrown off but looking closer it's so cool. the wings and eye at the top... the horns above the guard... the butterfly and gazing eye (buttereye) keychain... magnificent. the blade reminds me of x2 dark knight paine's sword. 10/10

Ocean Rage: looks pretty cool at first but the monstro mouth guard is literally horrifying i don't want to look at it anymore 1/10

YMX's keyblade: apparently has no name and is different than the one in bbs. nothing new really to say since it looks pretty similar but the goat head on top is super interesting. how much did No Name (luxu) influence young xehanort... 9/10

Mirage Split: absolutely perfect. i can't think of anything that isn't positive to say. the stained glass, the heart by the teeth, the thin lines, the gradient, wings, pointy, the keychain, literally all perfect. 10/10

Nightmare's End: also utterly perfect. i don't like yellow but it works here and looks great. the cyan gradient is startling but matches MS so i love it. all the colors in the stained glass are wonderful. 10/10

Starlight+: a little guady. but i love how the stars look like comets. the twisted blade looks neat too, but what's the point of the pointy bit on top. 7/10

Treasure Trove+: love that it looks golden and gem encrusted. very rich looking, but the cart is still leaking gems. 8/10

Lady Luck+: NOW the card thing makes more sense, i love how its incorporated throughout the design. more more interesting than the original. 9/10

Three Wishes+: looks like fire?? which is way cooler but why??? i like it more but where's the agrabah. 8/10

Olympia+: CLOUDS. like that zeus is in the clouds, but they took my columns. and the cyan handles are really weird. 7/10

Divine Rose+: excellent. what it should've been all along. the iridescenty guard is suuuper pretty and all the leaves and vines are great. 10/10

Moogle o' Glory: a lot happening here but i love smacking shit with a moogle head. there's so much happening and i don't really get it. 7/10

Fairy Stars+: i didn't know it could get better, the teeth is super cool looking but i wish the twisty blade was more visible. 9/10

Sleeping Lion+: love that it turns that metallic light blue color, very pretty. and the handle looks more like the gunblade! very nice looking and i used it a lot but the top is very weird. 9/10

Counterpoint+: let's take all the fun and exciting bits from the original and crANK IT UP TO ELEVEN. wait. stop. go back it's too much. very pretty still i love colors. 8/10

Fenrir+: my car key recovered from that fight. looks wayyy cooler and looks like ff7. hate the cyan glow though it feels weird. 6/10

Darkgnaw+: took me forever to find an image bc i keep calling it dreadgnaw. much cooler than the original, it looks like it's gonna bite you. the purple is also very nice. 9/10

Missing Ache+: POINTY. super cool but how does ventus twirl it around without poking himself. the colors are fun and it looks rad. 10/10

Diamond Dust+: i used this one the most <3 very pretty i love shades of blue and purple :) looks kinda icy but the top is weirdly flat. 9/10

Bad Guy Breaker: there's so much happening calm down 😭kinda nice but there's a lot to look at. also this world irritated me. 4/10

Gula's Keyblade: #leopardus4ever. as you can see, this keyblade is perfection. fun and spiky and lightningy. i think the whole blade should be lightning tho. 10/10

Aced's Keyblade: do any of these have names. anyway what a dreadgnaw ripoff 🙄 it suits him but guess what. i don't like him. 5/10

Ira's Keyblade: i don't like ira either but his blade is fucking great. love the teeth so much, and the colors. very pretty and cool 8/10

Invi's Keyblade: absolutely gorgeous. i love the flowing lines and little vines. love the colors and also it's super long. 9/10

Ava's Keyblade: girl this hurts to look at on a white background. very pretty though, i love how wispy and cloud-like it is. looks delicate which is great considering she'll kick anyone's ass. 8/10

No Name: unfortunately, this is absolutely wicked. look at it. it's wonderful. the goat head looks so much cooler than the other animal heads somehow, and i love the hollow center of the blade. and the teeth look like a claw, a little. just so fucking cool but i hate everyone who uses this. 10/10

Shooting Star: super pretty, i love how this one flows. i wish the blade went down to wrap around the guard though, instead of cutting off. 8/10

Hero's Origin: they took away my clouds again. i like that half of it is just. zeus. the lightning bolts are cool, but the handle and guard don't really match. 6/10

Favorite Deputy: you are not my favorite deputy fuck you. i don't like toy story but i do like cactuses. 3/10

Ever After: this one's nice :) the guard is super pretty, but i wish there was more going on with the blade. 7/10

Happy Gear: this one's kinda ugly but i like it soo. the energy canister guard is cute. 7/10

Crystal Snow: i hate it so much. it's boring and the keychain is olaf and i don't like frozen. 1/10

Hunny Spout: pretty cute :) the honey jars remind me of sweetstack. i like the wooden handle. 7/10

Wheel of Fate: cool as hell that's my boat. love that the blade looks like a mast that's so cool. wish it wasn't so gray though. 8/10

Nano Gear: ah, here's the color. i like everything except how the nanobots look at the top. it's just kinda gross. 7/10

Grand Chef: oh this is so cute. but why is remy the teeth. poor rat :( but it looks very nice i like how the Tower goes into the guard 8/10

Classic Tone: fuckyoufuckyoufuc. i hate this one. pretty ugly and i don't like it. 2/10

Starlight: SO GOOD. very simple but i like that. looks mysteriously similar to the kingdom key? i love it but it needs a little more going on. 9/10

Ultima Weapon 3: LOOK AT IT. ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE THEY CAN'T MAKE A BETTER ULTIMA WEAPON. the silver and red look so good and it's spiky and cool. and the red is glittery!!! why? i don't care it's phenomenal. the spiky heart teeth. that it looks like it's moving. i wish i could break my rating scale. 10/10

Braveheart: riku kingdomhearts stole my fucking car key. we've all heard the complaints i'm not repeating them 1/10

Star Cluster: it's really nice >:( mickey switch with riku pleaase. the star theme is really cute and the colors are nice but why does it look so similar to the kingdom key. 8/10

Flame Liberator: i don't like the name but ok i guess. the keyblade is so fucking cool though. it's what bond of flame wanted to be. i love fire and it looks like it moves so hell yeah. 9/10

Xblade: still can't decide if i like this or not. How do you hold it comfortably. Love the glistening spiky bits. 8/10