#thank u. for ur time. pls carry on. have a nice day

[mariska]

last post i just reblogged reminded me i never remembered to post these silly lil photos i took on here...ever since i had to quickly get a new phone from my other one's (rip iphone 6s and my beautiful beloved Standard Analog Headphone Plug....we had a good run old friend...........) screen literally bubbling up like it was going to actually explode from internal heating if i kept using it i now have a super cool high quality camera lens situation that i hope to be able to use for my various diy art projects and stuff but its still been less than a month since i've has this model phone and its the first like. modern within two years or so high tech camera i have ever owned in my life and i grew up in the pre-phone camera era of handheld digital cameras for broke aspiring photographers so its been very exciting for me to test things out and look at settings (i can allegedly take photos & videos in literal 4k HD with this camera lens system according to the quality options in the system settings which is. absolutely mind boggling to me in a good way i cant believe i have a camera in any format that has the potential to capture things to that extent!!!)

anyways all of that to say that i'm obviously very out of touch with how any of this modern high tech high resolution works as of now, but i picked this version of this phone model specifically because it gives me a lot of opportunities to hopefully have more personal, accessible control over visual photo/video art and editing and filming etc etc but since i haven't had a chance to really learn how to utilize everything the way i want to yet, i've been having fun taking 'portrait mode' photos in the meantime just to try and get the hang of one feature at a time, and a week or two ago when i had my Weekly Day Outside Of My Home For Therapy Appointment, one of my moms and i decided to take a drive just for the heck of it to get some air and see the world.

all of this. again. to say. here are some portraits i took of my beloved soft fluffy chicken bag (his name is Lestat de Poultrycourt 😌) while sitting in the passenger seat and cracking up with one of my moms over how hard i was trying to pose him in a way that did not show my hands like a muppet operator. i am 99% sure at least one of these pics will end up being used by me as an album cover for a song at some point in the future so look forward to that. fjshdhsgshsgshsvsh

[morgana-larkin]

Haii okay here’s my angst request! I love a good regretful jealous Mel hehehe. I was thinking you’re both teachers and she likes u but is like “I’m too cool for pining” so she does the extreme opposite and is kinda standoff-ish or blunt w u at school. When you’re alone she’s a little better but still not super lovey dovey. You “take the hint” and move on, and someone new comes into ur life (can you PLEASE for the LOVE OF GOD name this rando new person joy??). And then one day Mel’s like “let’s be official” And you’re like what? Why? I thought u didn’t like me also I have Joy now. And then Mel’s like wtf and she gets rlly jealous when she sees u w her now and then she tries to sabotage y’all’s blooming relationship. In the end maybe no happy ending pls?? If ur comfortable writing that :)

Hehe I LOVE a good heartbreak. Also I’m obsessed w joy Huerta (hence my username) and have been asking everyone to use it in fics AND PPL DONT ALFJKS. lmao anyways. I hope this is sumn ur comfortable writing!

OMG! you’re really testing me here! If I’m honest, it was hard to write. I rewrote it a few times, it hurt a little, might make a part 2. Honestly if even one person requests a part 2 with a happy ending then I will write one. As always, not edited in the slightest, I hope you like it!

On another note: keep sending prompts for one shots! I decided to write one shots about Chessy from parent trap played by our favourite redhead, Lisa Ann Walter, so you can send prompts for her too!

Part 2

Green Isn’t Your Colour

Warnings: (where do I start lol) Jealous Mel, upset Mel, a bit of toxic Mel, angst and no comfort, no happy ending , good luck lol

Words: 3.2k

You walk in through the entrance of Abbott Elementary. You’ve been here for a year already and you’re finally feeling like you’re settling in. You’re a third grade teacher, you helped Melissa out as she wouldn’t have another split class again and that made her happy from the day you got there and hearing the news.

You walk into the break room, hot chocolate in hand, you don’t like coffee that much, but nothing could beat a good hot chocolate. You go and sit on an empty table, taking some tests out and start marking them. Melissa looks over at you from her table. She looks at the way you’re flawlessly marking, glasses on and concentrating on what you’re doing.

You glance up as you feel like you’re being watched and see Melissa looking at you, but then she quickly looks away when you notice and you smile. You liked her since you first set eyes on her and it only grew from there. But lately it seems like she’s off and you’re unsure why. She was nice to you when you started but now it’s like she’s the opposite and you don’t know why. You asked everyone else if they could answer why she’s different but no one noticed the change.

You got up and picked up the tests and decided to just carry them to your classroom. You passed by Melissa on the way out. “See you later Melissa.” You told her with a smile. She just nodded her head at you and went back to her phone. You looked at Barb and she just shrugged, not noticing a difference.

During your second period prep you finished marking the tests with a breath of relief. Just then Melissa knocks on your door and you look at her and smile. “Hey Melissa.” You tell her and she just has a neutral face and you drop your smile.

“I found the book you were asking for. The little eagles liked it last year and I’m sure they’ll like it again.” She said and handed you the book.

“Oh perfect, thank you.” You told her and smiled at the book. Melissa looked at you and couldn’t help the small smile forming at your excitement of the book. And you looked up at her to see the small smile on her face. “Hey Melissa, can I ask you something?” You asked and she looked at you confused.

“You can but it doesn’t mean I’ll answer.” Melissa said.

“Um ok. Well I was just wondering why you’re acting differently around me?” You ask and she looks at you with a neutral face again.

“I don’t know what you mean?”

“Well you were nice to me last year but now you’re acting distant and I don’t know why.” You asked her. “Did I do something wrong?” You added and that took her by surprise. She doesn’t want you to think you did anything wrong because you didn’t. Melissa has a crush on you and she doesn’t want to show it or let anyone know, and her acting nicely to you last year definitely raised suspicions, so she went back to how she acts with everyone else.

“You didn’t do anything kid. This is just how I am with people.” She said.

“You’re not like that with Barb.” You said.

“Barb is my best friend, so of course I’m nice to her.”

“What about Janine? Jacob? Gregory? Or when Ava at times? You’re nice to them.” You told her, getting a little frustrated.

“That’s because they’re my friends.” She said and you were taken back by that and it definitely stung. Melissa looks at your expression and knew she shouldn’t have said that. She does think of you as a friend but it just slipped out.

“Oh ok, well glad to know where we stand then, just co workers. Thank you for the book Ms. Schemmenti, I’ll return it tomorrow.” You tell her and go back to your desk. “If that was all then if you don’t mind, I have a lesson plan to do.” You told her and she nodded her head.

“See ya around kid.” She said and left. She knew she fucked up there. She’ll have to start being a bit nicer to you to get back in your good graces.

Back in your classroom you took a big breath. You thought you and Melissa were friends but I guess you were wrong. No wonder she’s always short and blunt with you.

The next day you were at the coffee shop, receiving your hot chocolate like always, turning around to leave and bumped into someone, spilling your hot chocolate all over them and a bit on yourself.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry! I just wanted to talk to you and didn’t expect you to turn around.” The person said.

“Oh well I feel like I should be apologising, my hot chocolate mostly went on you. Wait, you wanted to talk to me? Why?”

“Because I see you in here everyday and I think you’re pretty.” She said with a blush and you blushed at her compliment.

“Oh uh th-thank you.” You stuttered a bit, not used to compliments.

“Can I buy you another hot chocolate? As an apology?” She said and you looked at her.

“Oh you don’t have too.”

“I want to though. Please, I insist.” She said and you smiled at her. She bought you another hot chocolate and handed it to you with a smile. “And there we go.” She said.

“Thank you.” You told her and saw the time. “Oh I gotta get to work.” You told her.

“Oh that’s alright I understand. I’ll see you again tomorrow?” She asked.

“Ya, I come here, same time every day.” You said with a smile and began to leave but turned around to her. “I never got your name btw.”

“It’s Joy.” She told you.

“I’m y/n.” You tell her and she smiles.

“You have a lovely name, it suits you.” She tells you. You blush and leave the coffee shop. You get to the school and immediately go to your classroom instead of the break room. You put your stuff done and see the book that Melissa gave you yesterday sitting on your desk. You might as well return it now, you got a few minutes before the students get here. You picked up the book and walked to the classroom next to yours and knocked on the open door. Melissa was stapling something and looked up at you and gave you a little smile.

Your heart fluttered a little at the smile and you remembered what she said yesterday. “Hi Ms Schemmenti, I came to return the book.” You told her, and held the book up.

She looked at you and remembered what happened yesterday and sighed. “Thanks y/n” she said and got up and walked over to you to take the book. “Did the little eagles like it?” She asked.

“Ya they did.” You said confused at her using your actual name

“I knew they would. You can borrow it whenever you want.” She told you and you offered her a small smile and nodded your head.

“Thanks Ms Schemmenti, I’ll keep that in mind.” You told her and left. She stared at you as you walked back to your own classroom and did a huge sigh and leaned back against her door.

A month goes by and you run into Joy everyday at the coffee shop. She took it upon herself to order you a hot chocolate and have it ready by the time you get there. You kept offering her the money for it but she always refuses, saying your company was payment enough. You exchanged numbers after a couple days and started texting for hours on end. By the second week she asked you out on a date and you said yes. By the third week she asked you to be her girlfriend to which you agreed excitedly.

At school, you noticed that Melissa has been a bit friendlier with you. You took her sudden change with caution though, you don’t want to get hurt again.

For Melissa, she wants to ask you out but she keeps getting scared. But after a month of being friendly with you, she decides to bite the bullet and just do it. She went to go see you at your classroom after the students left on Monday.

“Hey y/n, can I ask you something?” She asked you as she stepped in your classroom.

“Sure Melissa, what’s up?” You said and she smiled. You’ve been calling her by her first name again for about a week, and after you calling her Ms Schemmenti for 3 weeks, well she still smiles when you call her Melissa now.

“I wanted to ask you on a date.” She says and you look at her and freeze.

“What?” You ask, confused as hell.

“I wanted to officially ask you on a date.” She says and you look at her confused.

“Why?”

“What do you mean why?”

“I thought you didn’t like me.” You tell her and she looks a bit guilty.

“I never not liked you, when I realised I liked you near the end of the last year, I didn’t want to give away my feelings so I started acting distant towards you.” She says and looks down for a second then back up at you. “So will you go on a date with me?” She asks again.

“No.” You told her and she looked upset. “I did like you but I have a girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend? I thought you were single.” She says confused and still hurt.

“I was, until 2 weeks ago, her name is Joy.” You said with a smile. And Melissa looks at you with a bit of fire in her eyes. “If she’s real then I would like to meet her.” She tells you, crossing her arms,

“Oh ok, ya sure. I can ask if she can come meet everyone tomorrow morning if you want.” You tell her.

“Ok, I look forward to meeting her then.” Melissa says and leaves disappointed.

You asked Joy if she wanted to meet your coworkers tomorrow morning and she excitedly agreed immediately.

So the next morning, you meet Joy at the coffee shop as usual and she hands you your hot chocolate then you drive over to the school and walk in with her. You head to the break room with her and enter and all eyes look up at you and her.

“Everyone, I would like you to meet Joy, my girlfriend. Joy, this is Janine, Jacob, Gregory, Barb, Ava.” You said, pointing to everyone as you said their name. “And this is Melissa, the one who asked to meet you.”

“Hi everyone! And hi Melissa, I’m very much real as you can see.” Joy says and Melissa doesn’t look happy, she crosses her arms and the fire in her eyes come back. She thought you were lying and would have to keep being nicer to you before you agree to go on a date with her. Barb notices Melissa getting angry and puts a hand on her arm and that startles her and then just sits there, staring at you. She sees you being all happy as Jacob and Janine got up to come say hi to your girlfriend.

She wanted to be that person, be your girlfriend and she blew it. But then remembered that you said yesterday that you did have feelings for her, so maybe you still do. Then she smiles at that thought and thinks of different ways to play it. Joy would have to go of course, she ain’t gonna put a hit on her but instead she’ll try to sabotage it, and to do that, she’ll have to be nice first and get information.

So she gets up and goes over to you two. “Hi, nice to meet you. Ya I didn’t think you were real when y/n here as been single since I’ve known her.” She says to your girlfriend then proceeds to put an arm around your back as she mentions you being single and your eyes widen a bit.

“Oh that’s alright, it was a shock to y/n too when I asked her.” Joy says, and Melissa thinks it’s a shame she’ll have to sabotage it as she seems nice. But this person is getting in the way of her happiness so she gots to go.

“If you don’t mind me asking, how did you two meet?” Melissa asks.

“Oh we met at the coffee shop down the street, the one you told me about and I get a hot chocolate there every morning. And then I bumped into Joy about a month ago, like physically bumped into her and spilled my drink all over her.” You say with a chuckle.

“Ya she did but it was my fault, I saw her there every morning and after a couple weeks I decided to go talk to her and didn’t expect her to turn around at that very moment. So I offered to get her a replacement one and then we started talking.” Joy said with a smile.

And you noticed how Melissa’s hand got a bit lower on your back and you subtly get out of her grip and say an excuse. “Joy, do you want to go see my classroom?” You ask her and she immediately said yes. Joy waves bye to everyone and they all tell her it was nice to meet her and hope to see her again. And Melissa thinks that if it goes according to plan then she won’t be back to see them again.

At the end of the day, Melissa visits your classroom. “Hey y/n.” She says as you’re packing your things up.

“Oh hey Melissa. What’s up?” You ask her and sling your bag over your shoulders.

“Well I was wondering if I could go with you to the coffee shop tomorrow? I haven’t been there in awhile and wouldn’t mind a good store bought coffee once in awhile instead of one from the break room.” She says and you look at her confused.

“Oh I always meet Joy at the coffee shop in the morning.” You say and Melissa smiles, she knew it.

“Well that’s alright, maybe I could get to know her better then.” She says and you agree and tell her the time that you meet up with Joy.

The next morning, Melissa gets to the coffee shop first and orders a coffee for her and a hot chocolate for you. You and Joy come in a couple minutes later and see Melissa near a table with 2 drinks. “Hey Melissa.” You say and she looks over at you and smiles.

“Hey y/n and Joy. Here y/n, I got you a hot chocolate.” She says and sees the frown on Joy’s face before smiling again. Melissa smiles at that, she knew that Joy was still getting you a hot chocolate every morning. You said it yesterday to Janine and Jacob. “I would have gotten something for you but I forgot to ask y/n here what you like.” Melissa says and puts a hand on your shoulder.

Joy looks at the interaction and gives a confused look. “That’s alright, I’ll just go get a drink for myself. I’ll be right back.” She says and you and Melissa nod.

You look at Melissa a little confused. “Why are you being so much nicer all of a sudden?” You say to her and she just shrugs, feigning innocence.

“I don’t know what you mean y/n? I’m just getting to know your little girlfriend over there.” She says and hits you, Melissa is jealous.

“Melissa, are you jealous?” You asked and she scoffs. “I’m being serious, yesterday you asked me out saying you liked me. And now you’re at the coffee shop that I meet Joy at every morning and meeting nicer to me in front of her.”

“I’m just trying to make sure that she’s right for you, is all.” Trying to cover up the fact that you were right.

Before either of you can say anything else, Joy comes back with her drink. “Hey y/n, I would like to stay longer but worked called and asked if I could come in earlier. Like right now earlier. And I wouldn’t mind the extra cash.” She says and you nod.

“That’s alright, I understand, have a good day at work.” You tell her and she gives you a goodbye kiss on the lips and the fire in Melissa’s eyes return.

“Alright thanks for understanding, it was nice seeing you again Melissa.”

“Ya you too.” Melissa says back to her. Melissa didn’t like that kiss, and worse is that the only issue she has with Joy is that she’s with you. Other than that, Joy seems like a nice person, and she hates that fact.

At the end of the day Melissa stops by your classroom again. “Hey y/n.”

“Should I expect this to be a daily occurrence? You stopping by my classroom at the end of the day?” You say with a laugh and she gives a small laugh at that.

“Maybe.” She says and closes your door and walks up to you. You look at her confused for closing the door, but then think she probably wants to talk to you privately. “I don’t like her. Your girlfriend.” She says and you frown.

“Why?”

“I don't know, there’s just something about her that I don’t like.”

“Well you’ve only just met her. If you see her more then you might grow to like her.” You tell her with a smile.

“No I won’t actually.” She says and you’re confused.

“And how do you know you won’t?”

She looks you dead in the eyes and walks closer to you. “Because as long as she’s with you, then I won’t like her.” She says and she got very close to you and you had to walk back and you end up backing into your desk and she puts her hands on the desk on both sides of you, effectively trapping you. You look at her with wide eyes.

“Melissa, I-” and you don’t get to say what you were about to as her lips are on yours. You begin to kiss her back and then push her off. “Melissa what the fuck? You know I’m with Joy.” You tell her and she smirks.

“Then why did you kiss me back? And don’t deny it. I know you did before you pushed me off.” And you look at her speechless since she’s right. Melissa smiles at you and goes to kiss you again but you stop her.

“No Melissa, I’m with Joy now.” You tell her and she frowns.

“You wouldn’t rather be with me?” She asks and you shake your head.

“I’m happy with who I’m with. I’m sorry.” You tell her and walk out of your classroom, leaving behind a hurt Melissa who has a tear rolling down her cheek.

Taglist: @esposadejoyhuerta

@imaginesmultifandoms

@idonothingalldays-blog

@sexysapphicshopowner

@dvrkhcld

If you want to be added then let me know!

[heartsoji]

LOVE LANGUAGES

starring the bllk boys!

featuring kunigami rensuke, chigiri hyoma, and bachira meguru

a/n: sigh some easy headcanons bc i simply cannot write anymore

KUNIGAMI RENSUKE

acts of service!

pls acts of service just screams him

hes your hero, after all! hes at your service

you're hungry? here, have some of his food!

on your period? chocolate and midol for you!

cant go to sleep? he has a bottle of melatonin and huge, snuggly arms

he will literally do anything you ask

he's def an 'actions speak louder than words' typa guy so he feels that when he does something for you, its proof of his love

ALSO something that i was thinking ab was yk how kunigami is ripped

if ur feet were tired, he'd carry you on his back with ease

'are you sure im not too heavy?' *looks back at you with disappointment and betrayal* 'hell no."

hes a sweetie

CHIGIRI HYOMA

words of affirmation!

hes a rizzler, ok

he says cheesey things with the same composure he'd have if he was taking a nice stroll in the park

"the stars, the sun, the moon. they're supposed to shine bright, but they pale in comparison to you" with a calm, soothing smile

also CHIGIRIS VOICE

ITS SO HOT

HE HAS THIS LIKE SILKY SMOOTH, SUPER PRETTY, FLOWY, SOOTHING, SEXY VOICE OK

AND HE JUST LIKE SAYS THESE SUPER ROMANTIC THINGS WITH THIS SUPER HOT VOICE AND ITS JUST <3

ok sorry

he also provides really good comfort!

if you're crying from a rough day, he's there with you, rubbing your back, whispering sweet things into your ear

"it's ok, love. i know it feels like the end of the world now, but it was etc etc" WITH HIS SILKY SMOOTH VOICE UGH

HES SO PERFECT

AND GOING BACK TO HIS RIZZ

HE LIKE

DOES THIS

THING

I

AKJASJKSD

ok i hc that after he gives you those cheesy poetic compliments, he makes you look him in the eyes and just lets you melt into putty in his arms

hes just so

yes

(can u tell i love chigiri)

BACHIRA MEGURU

quality time + physical touch!

he love love loves spending time w/ you

he plans the most fun dates ever and he always makes sure you have a great time

picnic dates, arcade dates, amusement park dates, you get it

hes just so thoughtful and his laughter is literally contagious

hes one of the guys who will be happy just by being with you (and his happiness is contagious so youre happy too)

also hes super touchy

big fan of back hugs. you'll be standing there when you suddenly feel him ram into you, arms circling around your waist

a big cuddler also

i could def see him being either a little or big spoon tbh

he just loves being close to you

sometimes you'l be laying in bed when you hear a "YAHOOO" (like mario) and suddenly hes ramming down on top of you as you let out a loud, "OW"

he has the tightest hugs ever

just grabs you and squeezes you and spins you around

also loves dancing with you

he'll put on some fun music and he just spins you around and laughs and has fun

pls hes so cute i love him

heartsoji 𑁍 please do not steal, plagiarize, or repost onto any platform. thank you!

[navi-n0]

🎀Stoner!Choso Drabble🎀

Choso x femreader 18+ literature ig lmfao MINORS DNI!! Includes: weed usage, fellatio!! Infidelity

MENTION OF CHEATING ON UR (aged up) BF YUJI LMFAO YOU’RE A BAD GIRL!!!!!

A/N: this is my first Drabble pls be nice ;-;

I’m also stoned so I should be able to do this right idk

CONTEXT: You’re just starting to fall in love with Yuji Itadori, 4 months of dating in and you have one fateful night with his OLDER BROTHER CHOSO!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After a long, cloudy day of classes at University, you’re eager to get going to Yuji’s house. He loves watching movies, cuddling, and snacking with the weather so gloomy, Yuji always knew how to create sunshine on a rainy day (literally). The clouds above you darkened with a deep blue, and thunder boomed through the school grounds, the shit was so loud you flinched. It was that loud! You hurried to the train station to hopefully catch the soonest one to get to Yuji’s neighborhood, it wasn’t a far ride from University, but at rush hour the station can get pretty.. hectic. You send a quick message to Yuji to let him know you’re on the way, anticipating the large crowds already.

Y/N: Waiting for the next train! Should be 10 minutes :P movie night?

YUJI: YOU KNOW IT CUTIE ❤️❤️ I’ve got to run to the store to grab extra snacks and stuff. If you get there before me the door should be unlocked! I shouldn’t be long baby I can’t WAIT to see u 🥰🥰🥰

It didn’t bother you that you might be alone in Yuji’s apartment. He only lived with his older brother Choso, and he was either never home or isolated in his room, playing video games, his obnoxiously loud guitar or smoking weed. The dank reeked from his room each time he lit up, but it didn’t bother you much. You weren’t a little bitch about drugs. You’ll be on the couch picking options of movies for Yuji to pick through when he comes home from the store anyway.

With that thought, your train arrived, the doors slid open with the automated system announcing its departure to its destination. You stepped into the car and began to mindlessly scroll through your phone because let’s be honest, wtf else are you gonna do?? Updates on pop culture, memes, and the occasional thirst post is all that you see, nothing important but something to numb your brain until you arrive at your destination. Rain began to batter the train car and flashes of lightning filled the windows, followed by the inevitable crash of thunder. This storm showed no sign of stopping. You rolled your eyes because you forgot an umbrella, well you forget it every time because who just carries an umbrella with them? Not y/n, you barely get out of bed on time in the morning. The train stopped once again and the alarm chimed, vocalizing the arrival of the destination. You gathered yourself and your singular backpack, bracing yourself to run awkwardly through this pelting rain. The drops were thick and slapping the ground hard, shit looked painful. The doors slid open again and you began to speed walk towards Yuji’s apartment complex.

By the time you reached his unit, you were drenched. It wasn’t even a far walk but the rain was unforgiving, soaking your hair and clothes. The white button up that was your school uniform is now translucent, making it all the more obvious you forgot to put on a bra today too. Y/N is a hot mess tbh. Your skirt clung to your thick thighs and practically gave you a wedgie. After straightening yourself out and pulling your wet cardigan over your chest, you went to push the door handle down to enter the unit… Why is it not pushing?? It’s not moving.

The fucker forgot to leave the door unlocked.

You couldn’t help but groan and throw your head into your hands. Your silly boyfriend can be… something. With a few deep breaths you collect yourself again and pull your phone out swiftly, sending your grievances to your boyfriend expeditiously.

Y/N: Thanks for leaving the door unlocked cutie 🙃🙃

YUJI: WHAT?!?! I SWEAR I DID Y/N!!! I PINKY PROMISE!!!

*One Photo Attachment*

You chuckle out loud, adoring the fact that he actually sent a photo of his pinky. Yuji took pinky promises very seriously, so you had no reason to not believe him. But that doesn’t answer why the door is still locked?!

Y/N: Okay babe I believe you! Is Choso home? Maybe he locked it behind himself?

Yuji: He wasn’t when I left 😞 he went to go pick up more weed I think. He asked me to grab him some stuff too, I might be a little longer. IM SORRY BABY!!!! 😭😭😭😭

You can’t be mad at Yuji, you had no reason to. This is a mild inconvenience, not the end of the fucking world. You send a sweet message to calm your anxious boyfriend.

Y/N: It’s okay Yuji!❤️ I can wait for you here.

Yuji: You’re the best babe! I’m grabbing your favorite m&m’s now!

Your shoulders relaxed at the message, grateful for the sweet gesture. Yuji is seriously perfect. Your eyes dart up to the upper right corner of your phone,

5% is all you had. Well fuck… this was going to be harder than I thought. Hello boredom.

Just then, you hear loud muffled rock music approaching. A familiar black Subaru speeds into an empty spot near Yuji’s building, music still blaring through the small car, the beat was basically vibrating the windows. You recognize the song, even through a closed car you recognize Deftones anywhere. It’s Change, the guitars blaring through the complex. It’s Choso, though you can’t see him because of the white glaze over the windows, smoke seeps out of the small openings of the Subaru and the music keeps playing. He must be smoking while watching the storm, Choso was dark and moody like that. But you’d do the same thing if you partook in those activities. Your patience began to run out as Choso showed no sign of coming inside. You’d have to go ask him for his house key so you can get out of this fucking rain, it’s still coming down like a monsoon. You quickly walked back out into the downpour and frantically knocked on the black Subaru’s driver window. It was then opened to only a fucking inch or two, probably to contain his session. The veil of smoke escaping the car was opaque white, it caught you off guard with the sheer volume of it. The volume of the metal music died slowly. Two dark eyes glared out, staring at you in annoyance. Can’t he see it’s pouring and you’re trying to get inside!! The rain soaked your damp clothes again, causing a chill to run down your body, you nuzzled your wet cardigan closer, doing absolutely nothing for you.

“You broke the box,” Was all Choso groaned, hand resting on his chin with a blunt between his painted fingers. Was that supposed to mean something to you? “Choso, I need to get in it’s~”

“Get in then.” He smirks, pushing the unlock button inside, the audible click of the doors unlocking made you want to scream in frustration. The storm raging outside was still as strong as it started, the wind was now blowing. Twigs and branches were being swept across the parking lot. A lightning bolt hit a little too close for your comfort, and the crash of thunder that followed startled you right into Choso’s passenger seat. The black interior had LED lights strung across the dashboard and glovebox, you had to admit the car was pretty nice. The smoke didn’t really bother you either, at this point you’re getting used to it. What bothered you is that you’re still in your soaked school uniform, hungry and your boyfriend still isn’t here yet. You’re stuck with his stoned older brother, you have never spent time alone with him like this. Especially in his domain.

Your eyes are met with his after you scanned his car’s interior. He can see you have a look of approval and he’s smirking, a brown rolled cigar that can only be the source of this smoke is now in between you two. His index and middle finger holding the blunt as his nudges it towards you, “Wanna hit?” He asks lowly. The expression you give him tells him his answer. It’s not that he wanted to peer pressure you, he just enjoyed sharing his weed. Choso didn’t like smoking alone as much as most stoners would and he’s never really gotten to know his younger brother’s girlfriend. After his eyes read your clear NO expression, they floated to your soaked uniform. Your cardigan was not doing a good job of covering your chest, Choso noticed your nipples poking through the white blouse. He’d be lying if he said it wasn’t a beautiful sight. Choso took another deep drag off the blunt and inhaled sharply, puffing out his chest with an exaggeration. He pulled out his phone and typed a quick message, the swoosh of a delivered message played through his phone. “Where’s Yuji? He said he’d be back by now.” You finally said with a concerned tone, you tried to tap your phone to wake but were only met with a low battery flashing at you. You groaned again, Choso sees your distress and once again, offers his best solution. “You won’t feel so anxious if you hit it,” He raised the blunt between his fingers once more and gestured towards you. You scoffed at him and waved off his offer, “I think I’m already feeling it.” Your body did feel lighter and heavier at the same time. The seat sunk in with your body weight and you feel like you couldn’t move. “Lightweight,” Choso teases, and now he’s smiling.

You never really noticed Choso’s looks or even personality. This was your first time having a conversation other than the casual small talk you give to someone when you’re entering their house. He was cute.. hot would be a better word. His lips wrapped around the blunt and he took another deep inhale, the sound of his breathing was kind of.. erotic. Was the weed making you feel this way? This was all an entire new feeling and space you were in. It felt like you weren’t even on Earth anymore. The sun was setting, the storm was still raging on and the sky was getting darker, darker than normal because of the ominous clouds in the sky. The soft red glow of the car’s LED lights and Choso’s touchscreen dash were the only lights illuminating the black car, rock music was still playing too although it was at a much tolerable volume. Why was Yuji still not home? You directed your attention back to Choso who was rolling yet, another blunt. How much can this fucker chief? His long slender fingers split the cigar perfectly, he took his index to slide the guts into his cup holder ashtray. Now that was erotic, you suddenly thought about what his finger would look like sliding down your folds. He lifted the now empty cigar to his lips and licked the ends delicately, like a mother cat cleaning her newborn kitten. His spit trailed from his lips to the cigar and he wiped his mouth, setting the cigar on his rolling tray to prepare to break down the weed. “I know you’re curious over there,” He slyly said, making direct eye contact with the final lick. At this point you didn’t know if he was talking about smoking or him. You laughed, what he said wasn’t even funny but you’re laughing. Choso became hard not to stare at while he was rolling, he was gentle and grateful with his movements. His hair tied into messy space buns with face framing pieces falling into his face since he was staring down at his tray. He picked apart the weed nuggets into smaller portions and sprinkled it into the empty cigar. You never cared about drugs or smoking, but you weren’t totally opposed to trying it. Besides, Choso seems like a trustworthy guy you could have your first time smoking with. He seemed relaxed and happy too, what’s the harm in trying?

He lifted the filled cigar to his lips again, carefully placing his fingers around it to pinch the folds of the cigar together, licking in between like an envelope and sealing it shut. Choso noticed you staring again and decided to have some fun with you, he knows this look, you only give this look to Yuji but now it’s directed at him! Choso loved his younger brother more than anything, but he thought it was selfish that Yuji never brought your pretty ass around more. You’re cute, funny and hella curvy in the right places. Totally Yuji’s type, nah. You’re totally Choso’s type. With the blunt finally sealed, he picked his light up to his face. You couldn’t help but squirm at how hot he looked with the blunt between his lips and sparking it alive. His large chest rising and falling with each puff he took, ensuring that it would burn evenly. He took a moment to admire his work, smirking at the blunt then at you again. You froze in your seat, his hand generously offered one last time, he knows what it looks like when someone wants to but won’t ask. After a moment too long of debating, Choso took the blunt back to his lips and took a hit, “Hah, I’m just teasing princess, you don’t have to unless you want to. No pressure.” He says with a wink. Your flustered face made him laugh out loud, making him cough and choke on his hit. He beat his chest rhythmically and caught his breath again, “You’re cute,” He mutters and you both stiffen. The air became thick with tension and you weren’t sure if it was sexual or just plan awkward. Choso took another drag and that broke the silence, the heavy smoke that’s filled this tiny car for the past 15 minutes was like a chamber of marijuana for you. You were definitely high, your thoughts were everywhere but with Yuji, he was sweet, kind and everything you want. But something about Choso has you intrigued, he’s like a new flavor you want to taste, ride you want to take, a feeling you want to chase. Choso feels your longing, at his heightened level, he can read people better than before. He can see the way your legs clench together when he licks his lips, he can see you playing with your bottom lip, an obvious sign you’re thinking about something. Fuck it he thought, he sent Yuji on a wild goose chase anyway when you first got in his car. That’s what that last message was for, he asked Yuji to run to his favorite Rice house to pick up dinner. That should buy Choso enough time, he didn’t care about the consequences that will come from this. He was too high to care anyway, he felt needy, hungry, and so fucking horny. If he was going to make a move, he had to do it now.

Your body was boneless and your head was swimming, the effects of Choso’s hot box literally got you high. It felt great actually, you finally understood why so many people did it and felt bad for your previous judgement on Choso. Speaking of, he’s staring at you. This time his eyes were darker, there was something more than just a casual conversation inside and you got your clarification as Choso involuntarily adjusted his hardening cock in his sweats. They did no help covering his arousal, the mushroom head of his dick was so defined. He realized that you had caught him and a shade of red flushed his face. You’ve never seen such a calm guy so embarrassed, yet you weren’t embarrassed. You weren’t appalled or uncomfortable, you liked that you could make him feel out of control. And now that the ball was in your court, you took the chance. As if your brains connected and a spark blew, you’re climbing over each other to get in his back seat. Choso sits in the middle as you straddle his clothed lap, his hard cock pulsing in his sweats and you make it known that you’ve noticed. You whimper as your hips sway, grinding on his throbbing dick, he must be huge if you can feel him this much. Choso’s hands go to your waist then grip your ass aggressively, as if he’s holding on from you dry humping him and he’s absolutely loving it. He can’t imagine how good your pussy must feel, how your tits would look free from the chambers of your shirt and bounced while you’re riding his dick. He needed to focus so he doesn’t bust before he can actually feel you. He’s groaning and panting heavily as he claws at the buttons on your shirt, desperate to see what those perfect tits look like, or what they taste like. You follow his lead and quickly undo the rest of your shirt, he peels it down your back as his dark eyes widen. For the first time you actually see the white of his eyes, they’re always so dark with eyeshadow or dark period. Choso’s mouth watered at your figure and his hands eagerly quenched his thirst. They started at the sides of your jaw, he pulled your face down to look into his longing eyes. “Please, can I touch you?” Was Choso begging to touch you? The sight was all too beautiful, but could be better. You gave a smirk as your hands went around his waist to lift the black hoodie over his head, he adjusted his body so that it would come easier. This time your own mouth was watering at choso’s chiseled body. He didn’t wait for your answer again, you both just began to caress and squeeze each other. This felt like you’ve known each other and have been secretly in love, it shouldn’t feel this good the first time meeting your boyfriend’s older brother.

Unfortunately for you, with the combined sensations of being fucking high for the first time and Choso’s intoxicating touch, you forgot you even had a boyfriend. You were no longer on earth again, you and Choso were in this crazy spaceship filled with sexual tension. You couldn’t even think anymore with choso’s warm mouth against yours, his tongue teasing and lightly sucking on your own. Heavy breathing and fumbling limbs made the car all the much smaller and hotter. “You’re beautiful, y/n” His eyes drinking in your half naked, lustful body. Choso’s hand went up and down with a hard smack. Your back arched into him, shuddering at the sudden pain. You let out a half whimper half squeal and that made Choso all the more harder in his pants. “Fucking perfect,” he sneered again, taking the fat of your ass in his hands and squeezing again. The top of his fingers find the lace of your panties, “Off,” he quietly demanded. You decide it’s your turn to have fun with him. Your hand reaches down to fondle the hard length in his gray sweats, feather like fingertips grazed against his cock and he winced in agony. He bucked his hips up at an attempt to get more from you, your own smirk staring back at his flustered face. “Where’s those sweet fucking manners?” You whisper in his ear, fully emerging your hand into his sweats, no boxers. What a fucking slut~ you hummed darkly. You gripped his dick tightly, precum oozed out of his needy cock and he makes the most beautiful sounds, a whine with shuddering breath followed by pants. Music to your ears. “F-Fuck y/n,” he hisses, he didn’t expect you to take control so abruptly, but it’s making his balls ache for your warmth more. Choso doesn’t sleep around, but he’s not a virgin either. He didn’t care for casual sex at all, but this felt right to do. He definitely felt your body call him right? You were giving him the fuck me eyes right?

Choso couldn’t waste another fucking second overthinking the situation, he needed you now damn it!

“Please, y/n! I wan’ your pussy..” He lets out the most pathetic whine you’ve ever heard a man make. Now he’s really wanting you, hot, sweaty, high, and straddling him half naked in the backseat of his Subaru while the storm continues. Flashes of lightning were the only source of illumination, which is why you could miraculously see his beautiful blushing face. His bangs were sticking to his forehead and his space buns were more like ragged ponytails from your hands exploring his beauty. His tinted windows were fogged on the inside, a faint cloud of smoke still lingering in the small cabin of the car. You put your weight on your bottom and Choso holds your waist for stability, you spread your legs right there in his lap, your back now touching the center console. Thunder and lightning strike and assault the sky, giving Choso flashes of your half naked body and it makes him tremble. With one hand you pull the front of your skirt up and your fingers take your panties to the side, revealing your glistening cunt, it’s literally fucking glistening it’s so beautiful. Choso could’ve came in his pants right there, practically having to look away from your gorgeous cunt so that he can contain his own orgasm. He’s now understanding how Yuji can make those ridiculous sounds when he overhears you guys having sex. Fuck he wants to see if you can make him sound those high pitched moans and whimpers, hell you’re already doing it now. He’d bark if you asked him to, he’s all yours in this moment, he doesn’t want to waste another not knowing what that pretty pussy tastes like.

You lock hungry eyes and he leans in to ravage in your marinating mess waiting for him. Your longing bodies craving to be one, you can feel his hot breath on your fluttering pussy when suddenly-

Choso’s phone starts to ring.. it’s Yuji..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’m throwing an edging party but you guys can’t come! :P

Tags for my pookie wookie bookies I love u: @comicalgrievance @milkpup

[pringlesaregoodngl]

Haii! I saw you wanted someone to request I'm gonna ask for a female reader that acts like Amy rose from sonic for fizzarolli,Verosika,Blitzø,Beezlebub,Lucifer, and Vaggie and Charlie together if you can't do it all it's okay but I've been waiting for a reader that acts like some sonic characters so I wanted to request so hope you have a good day or night :>

hello! And thank you for requesting but pls next time if u ever request pls make sure it’s 4 people but I’ll let it go since I don’t know which characters are ur most favorite ❤️

fizz💚

Fizz LOVES ur personality and how bubbly u are he even calls u bubble 🫧

he loves making u laugh and hearing ur laugh

when u two are u in bed he loves cuddling next to u and making jokes until I fall asleep

and when u try to help him calm done he just tells u he’s fine even know he’s not

💚

verosika 🩷

she’s kinda likes ur personality ig only because she just wants u to be a little more serious sometimes

but she loves seeing smile and she loves how cute it is

when u try to help her with something like singing she’ll sometimes let u help but not all the time

when she gets home she likes to watch a movie with u and when u fall asleep she carries u to bed

🩷

blitzo ❤️ * the o is silent *

he likes ur personality but sometimes he which u could be rude to people

he LOVES buying little horses for u and him and sometimes Luna to all play with

when u help him he doesn’t care he just thinks it’s nice of u to help him

every time he gets home he’ll just fall asleep in ur arms

❤️

beelzlebub 💛 * couldn’t find a gif for her*

she loves ur personality

she’s loves how bubbly u are and sweet

every time u help her with parties she just loves it

and when she comes home she makes sure ur safe

💛

Lucifer 🧡

He’s like ur personality but he doesn’t love it

he we’ll always make ducks with

ur the reason why he has so many ducks because u give him to much ideas

and when yall are in bed he makes sure u fall asleep on his wings

🧡

Vaggie and Charlie 💜🤍

Charlie LOVES ur personality so much but Vaggie kinda likes it mostly because she’s stuck with two bubbly people

Charlie loves how u always smile Vaggie loves how u like to help

when u help Charlie she just gets all excited when u ask her but with Vaggie it depends what u ask to help her for

and at night all of u guys fall asleep together

💜🤍

[junicult]

Hello! I really love how you write for harvey and had wanted to ask this for a long time but i can’t see if you’re open or closed for request/Asks.

But if you are may i ask you what do you think about Harvey knowing dances like Cha cha? or Waltz?

I don’t know where this idea came from but Whenever i see him on the town especially with the seasonal outfit mod on winter~

He always strikes me as a refined man from a wealthy family and I don’t even know why plus his portrait looks like he’s the type to listen and sing along to up town girl (T-T)

Thank you~

pls forgive how messy this entire thing is i just worked an 8 hr shift but i see harvey…i gotta write for harvey.

i’d agree he was raised pretty well-off, but still humble. he never really had to worry about money growing up, and i still feel like when he reached a certain age he got a minimum wage job just for his own benefit.

like he never struggled growing up, but he also wasn’t swimming in money. he could afford to get things he wanted, but he didn’t unless he needed them. whether his parents raised him that way or not, he’s always been responsible.

and i definitely agree he’s a gentleman, always has been. he was the type that was raised to say “excuse me,” before leaving the dinner table, y’know?

speaking of, his family was also the kind that made it important to eat dinner together every night. i think he’s carried that on since childhood.

i wanna hc him w siblings. i just feel like he was the middle child for some reason. it radiates off of him. either that, or only child. but i think it’d be cute to imagine him as the middle brother of two sisters.

the most refined men have older sisters, THIS IS A FACT!!

he’d just be forced to listen to all of their problems as teenagers, and he’d learn a lot from them. i know he got along with them so well. he was a little nerd with his interests, and his sisters would gift him little model airplanes on his birthday that he still keeps in his apartment 🫶🫶

now, to bring up the dancing thing; i also agree. his parents probably threw all of them in like cotillion when they were preteens. like u know those like 6-week long ballroom dancing classes that take place like every wednesday night or something… (am i embarrassing myself by knowing too much abt this?)

yeah. he did one of those. and the fact that the knowledge stuck with him for so long says something. but it’s not one of those things he’d just tell you, it’s something you’d find out on your own.

let’s say you’re a fairly new couple, but you still haven’t met each others parents / family yet and stuff. so he’s spending time with you one day, cooking u dinner (as per usual) and he just drops the bomb like, “my sisters wedding is in a few weeks. i was wondering if you’d be my plus one?”

obviously you said yes because…well…it’s also an excuse to get away from work for a weekend and spend time with your boyfriend.

but also it hit u that ur gonna be meeting his fucking family then, too😭😭

ANYWAYS the weekend finally comes, he’s dressed in a cute little suit, got a nice little haircut for his sisters wedding & he’s looking very handsome. he gets to see you all dressed up too, and he’s just a smiling mess the entire weekend because it’s such a special day and he’s a sentimental guy. he definitely dropped a few tears during the ceremony & omfg i’m getting so off track LMFAO

so when the time comes where the bride and groom get to have their first dance, your nerves have calmed significantly because you’ve already met his family, all is well and now you’re both happily watching the newly weds. (he’s definitely not thinking about being in this scenario with u, no. not at all.)

now everyone gets to come in, so ever the gentleman he is that was raised right, he asks you for a dance.

it’s only then when you realized you’ve never actually seen harvey dance, so when he takes your hand and delicately holds onto your waist, guiding you—it’s baffling. you’d expect the anxious man u know and love to be a little uncoordinated & nervous. but no. here he is making u look like a FOOL.

“i didn’t know you could waltz,” you whisper, adding a little laugh.

“i didn’t know you couldn’t waltz.” he teases, smiling at your look of shock. he easily guides you through the dance. no he doesn’t dip you or anything because who is he to steal the light from his sister, and also that’s so excessive 😭

but towards the end he pulls you in for a short kiss, just long enough to get the message across that he’s happy you’re the one he danced with.

like he’s trying to tell you ur the only one he wants to dance the rest of his dances with.

[rzyraffek]

hello again jiji (walks on all fours and leaves his order) a reaction from the slashers (the ones you want) to a y/n that draws nsfw of them (again, I love the other one) KISSES AND THANK YOU SO MUCH♡

Omg its u again🙄/j As always thanks for reuqest!! Sorry it took few days to write I was sick😔pronouns she/her Requests open

Slashers reacting to y/n nsfw drawings of them

Asa emory

He just came back, he is rarley home so he assumed she will be out or sleeping

He went into house and streight into bedroom(bug men needs sleep too😴)

He saw the drawing just vibing on desk near bed, he really looks at Her stuff but he choose violence today

"Uhhhhh🧍‍♂️" "wha, oh ur home😊 nice to-Asa what are you looking at?😨" "Uhhhhhh🧍"

Asa did expect her to miss him (due to him being all busy and away from home most of time) but like?? Gurl? U down bad pls??? She could say so? "Aww poor loney thing, you know you could just text me~" "🤯NO😳Asa its 4am😩🤨"

I mean Asa is very very creative men im sure He will figure something out, how to make it up to her.

"I always thought you prefered bugs tbh" "I- You mean like in bed??🤨" "yea😔" "wtf🧍"

Ghostface

Man just came back from lovley killing spree he had, he was ready to tell her all about stupid people he encoutered today

"Im back honey! Ooh- she left little gift for me awww*sees the drawing* 😳😍oh myy i didint know you had those ideas"

Btw she in fact did not leave it there on purpose and she did not want him to see it

"What what u screaming about *sees it* ohgodno i can explain really I-"

If he will try to tease her, she should just shmack him really🔨, he stops or gets bullied by his gf

Once per few weeks he will radomly remind her of sins that she commited, she will exprience flashbacks

Heelshie Brahms

Man was watching her draw for good 30minutes, of course she had no clue, he was in walls

He didnt really know what she was drawing but she seemed really blushy and into it. And we all know that Brahms is curious creature ofcourse he will look at stuff she drew

Bro got into the room while she was out doing chores. He took the paper, and looked at it for good few mintues until "oh I forgot my towel-BRAHMS WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN- NNOO DONT LOOK" "Bloody hell what am I looking at🤨"

He wasnt flustered or anything He just kinda 🤨💀

"I mean if you have any Dreams you could ju-" "NO NO I DONT IM GOING BACK TO AMERCIA"

She in fact didnt go back to amercia, and he stole the drawing btw

Yautja

Ah😍 he came back from hunt, ready to give y/n a lovley gift!

Oh mate im back from hunt! I- what- what is that- what is the meaning! I- Mate explain!!"

Alien man got confused

He will carry it all the way to place where shes vibing rn (bonus points if they leave with other humans/yautjas cuz He wasnt covering any of it) "WHAT what, what you mean mate??? I- I do not understand :( "

Guys pls be patient the big guy does not understand :(

Its even worse because not only she has to wittnes her lover being all 😨😔😍 but in addition she has to explain it to him?? Duble boom

"If you crave anything mate, you could just tell me🙄"

This is post made by asexual gang. Shout out to all asexual gang members. Remeber to like and subscibe to join asexual gang

Not the best fics, i would rate it 6/10 in funny scale.

[silent-wolf]

ranking the batfamily on whether i would be friends with them irl 😁: (ps this is all just a jokey joke so pls dont take this seriously 😇)

7. damian

guys im sorry

love the little demon but he would probably kill me for making ur mom jokes

hes got spunk if u consider it being mildly homicidal thoughts at every constant minute

probably the friend i would not consider going for lunch with cuz he’ll give me a dirty look for eating like a pig 

he would be a good tutor tho, my saving grace in calculus

but he would make me cry by the end of that session cuz i cant divide to save my life 💔 6. jason

he’s a fucking theatre kid

AND an english nerd, like pick a struggle man 😭

it might be residual high school eng trauma but i cant be friends with someone who genuinely likes english

honestly tho, i wouldn't mind hanging out with him outside of school

i just dont know what we would have in common to talk abt

gym classes with him has to be fun tho

he would probably kick my ass at every game, but thats besides the point 5. cass

shes scary asf, but shes hot so its okay

i would probably have a hallway crush on her

shes probably in the friend grp, but has other friends shes closer with

rlly fucking good at pe and doesnt hesitate to show off

probably skips a bunch of classes but no one says anything

would probably hang out more as a grp than one on one

the only person i would consider giving my house keys to 4. dick

the sweetest guy in the grp

i would assume he was just a nice guy at first but he is just rlly genuine 

would be the subject of ridicule because of his god awful fashion sense

is a senior but hides in the junior classes cuz girls always chase him around asking for his number

is the mom of the friend grp and always carries around protein bars, tissues, and basic first aid 

always does wellness checks and picks up on the first ring if u need anything. bless him <3

my emergency contact 3. duke

would be one of my closer friends

the perfect balance of obliviously unaware and stupidly concerned

i would ask him for hw answers only for him to text back with a question mark

he was the sacrificial lamb who was made to sit in the first row in class

ends up falling asleep and gets detention 😔 if anyone asks tho, its because he did smthin super scandalous and totally not school appropriate 👍

we became chem lab partners, but fucked up freshman level titrations so many times, that the teacher kicked us out

has the best packed lunches (thank u alfred)

i steal his lunch and he ends up eating shitty cafeteria food 👍 2. steph

MY LITERAL 4LYFER 🤞

her fashion sense>>. but dont be fooled, most days she throws on a ragged hoodie that way too soft to be legal

has a billionare on her side, but still steals MY mcdonalds fries

always carries around extra hair ties 

comes over so often that there is a steph size dent on my bed, where she would flop down

has the prettiest notes which are a life saver for last minute cramming

the friend you would go to experiment different makeup styles on 

my partner in crime for any tom-foolery 

would make me snort during class which sends us to detention 

tim

i would fucking hate him at first glance

but somehow we would bond through our shared trauma of high school calculus 

the type of friendship where u would go on spontaneous road trips a week before finals, only to end up stranded in a random petrol bunk

a responsible adult (read: alfred) would then come to pick us up after we call them in literal tears

a weekly tradition of trying the most grotesque slushy concoctions 

cannot for the life of him memorise shakespeare, but can recite word for word every iconic vine in existence 

would tutor me in chemistry, only to end up in tears at my incompetence 😭

extremely introverted but suddenly becomes the loudest person ever when it comes to embarrassing someone

[chaneajoyyy]

Dear brilliant and stunning librarian, would you happen to have a list for:

Miguel O’Hara x black or poc reader

Simon Basset x black or poc reader

Please please please with a cherry on top if you have the time. 🙇🏾‍♀️

Oh thank you boo🥹. Hey love!!! I sure do!!!

MIGUEL O'HARA X BLACK OR POC READER

on the way, sunday mornings- @demiesworld

"idk if it’s weird but do you know that thing where you grab your boobs for comfort?? imagine doing that to miguel 😭😭", a change in place, "omgg sunshine reader and her baby bots are an epitome of cuteness 😤🥺 i bet she would refuse to call then any other name than baby bots and watch miguel slowly loosing a "battle" - he will end up calling them like that too 😭", "i feel like miguel def gives rly mind blowing orgasms but not on purpose tho??", "no one can tell me that miguel isn’t the biggest gentleman ever!! He will carry your bags, open doors and all that like his life depends on it (all of it obviously with his constant frown but deep inside he couldn’t be happier)", mornings, "oml https://www.tumblr.com/inkdrinkerworld/723831735977197568/i-feel-like-miguel-def-gives-rly-mind-blowing imagine him giving you head…", "miguel would actually be *so* gently while fingering you..omg", "ab riding with miguel makes me go feral. like r is being so needy, and he's just like “this is all you're getting”, "can i request grumpy miguel x sunshine reader where miguel is more grumpy than usual because a spider keeps hitting on reader, but they’re so oblivious to the flirting and miguel interprets the interaction as them flirting back, when they’re just being nice (if that makes sense, no worries if you don’t want to :) )", "what about grumpy!reader and grumpy!miguel, like sexual tension and staredowns and aaalmost kissing but not and WHEEWAWWWSEDR", "sunshine civilian!reader and grumpy!miguel's date getting interrupted by some other anomaly and him being all grumpy and annoyed while she's just like "it's fine! just don't get hurt !!" , "could you write a blurb where autistic!reader is having a non-verbal day and miguel stops peter b from asking her a lot of questions and stuff because she can't respond? thank you <33", "Miguel prompts you say?? could i request "just...come here." pretty pls and ty xxxx", "pretty pls could u do headcannons of when miguel is jealous LORD cant get enough of him 😔😔😔", "Miguel asking Peter B for love advice since he wants so badly to ask the reader out on a date but it's been so long since he got involved with someone that he just don't know what to do 😂🩷", "Hiiiii what do you think about Miguel x grumpy!reader? I see Miguel and sunshine reader quite a lot here and as a black cat/ fellow grump…I was curious~", "Miguel doesn't want anyone to know but he actually loves that Peter brings Mayday to the association. His heart melts every time she laughs and he honestly loves watching her powers develop.", "for miguel maybe number 1 from the gesture prompts?? possibly with autistic reader<3", "mon bébé!! would u ever consider writing more abt your harleyquinn!reader x miguel?? i loved itttt soooo🥺🥺 maybe one where he learns about her past relationship with the joker and how bad he treated her which makes him want to protect and love her even moreee (also it just makes him want to track down the goddamn clown and beat the fuck outta him) I LOVE LOVE LOVE UR WORKKKK", "fawn my love!! If it’s no bother, what do u think abt miguel being with a harleyquinn!fem!reader? i am dying to hear ur thots on that!b🤍🤍"- @inkdrinkerworld

multiple endings- @infernalodie

drip- @daydreamingsirens

SIMON BASSETT X BLACK OR POC READER

pleasing the duke series- @royallyprincesslilly

*IF ANYONE KNOW ANY MORE MIGUEL O'HARA AND SIMON BASSETT FICS PLEASE HIT MY LINE!!!!*

[shurisneakers-side]

hey gorgeous ;) (this fic has consumed me since i read it)

She’s reciting the events of a date she went on yesterday or the day before, although admittedly, you’d only caught detached words for the past double-digit minutes.

LISTEN. If it's study time and ur around to study but are instead TALKING i will probably lose my mind. i will listen and be nice but INTERNALLY. fumes

The words don’t last too long in your mind, too cluttered with equations and vocabulary to make space for them.

reader has things to do!!! grades to achieve!! leave!!

“The girls told me he goes on a lot of dates but I can just tell I’m the one.”

nvm she's me as fuck she can stay

You nod. “Wow.”

pls the disinterest

Probably. You duck your chin, highlighting a sentence. “Isn’t it a group effort?”

humbling him even when he's not around. angie said this is MY 2000s romcom with uninterested girl and loverboy and i was SEATED

Gotta be there early to support Bucky,”

my clown ass for 8 years

“Does it matter? Honestly?” you rebut, taking care to watch your surroundings as you bully your friend. “Your quarterback wouldn’t cheat on you so I’m assuming it’s one that’s not Thor.”

BOYFRIENDS????? HELLOOOOOOOO???????

“Really good.” The golden thread of happiness threaded through Bruce’s words comes through clear and clean. You can imagine him as he talks into the phone, glancing at Thor to make sure he can’t hear as he plays with his fingers. “I’m really sorry for leaving you there.”

IM GIGGLING STOP THIS

“Wait, I have to go too? Why?” you whine.

support ur bestie's loser bf come on now !

“Yeah, you’re going,” Bruce declares. “They’re not that bad and you know it. Besides, Thor wants you to braid his hair. You know my fingers always get tangled.”

braid his hair 😭😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Thor bellows your name excitedly when he spots you both, heading over. You glance up to give him a smile, quickly continuing to type the stray thoughts you’d been trying to catch when he turns, an extravagant arm extending as if to present you to the few guys with him. “This is the lovely lady I told you all about. She is very smart.”

need him

“Oh.” Bucky blinks blankly, tongue poking into his cheek before he clears his throat and manages a lift of the left edge of his lips. “‘Makes sense someone so pretty would have good taste.”

MF DIDNT WASTE A SECOND LMAOOOOO

“It was amazing, I couldn’t let it slip by!”

shes cool and smart and supports local artists. literal icon

“What’re you talkin’ about, punk? What line?” Steve snickers. “Any of ‘em.”

GET HIS ASS STEVE. CORNY LOSER (endearing)

She catches Bucky’s actions and sends him an amused look.

he's so lovesick and everyone can see it

He winces, forcing himself to not glance back at you. “You’re a really great girl, Quinn, but I don’t think we’d work out. I’m sorry.”

at least he was kind about it

“Oh, you know,” Bucky starts with a nonchalant shrug, “of the ‘insane stamina’ and ‘could totally carry a bus’variety. You know, the ‘Winter Soldier’ name.”

i need to bully him. i need to do this or i'll die

“Bucky Barnes, right?” you ask him. He pushes his tongue against his cheek at the blow to his ego and nods. “Which one were you again? All the uniforms are the same, I can only recognize Thor and Piet.”

THANK U. ANGEL. PUT HIM IN HIS PLACE UR THE COOL ONE HERE

He chokes as he mimes nursing his wound. “Just digging it in deeper, aren’t you? Vixen.”

so ashamed to say this would definitly work on me angie u cannot make him charming and goofy coded

“Oh, you’re seventeen! The ball hogger! You do realize you’re in a team, right?” “Oh.” You think. “Then no.” “Oh, my bad,” you deadpan, placing a hand on your chest and rocking on your heels. You flutter your lashes at him and melt your lips into a watery smile. “Oh my, golly! Benson’s sweaty jersey!”

KJHGKJDFNGDKFJGNDFKJGH OH MY GOLLY BENSONS WEKJHDGKJDFHGDF;G;FKGVGJVSDGR

“Bucky,” Bucky grumbles. “Bucky’s sweaty jersey.”

HE DIDNT EVEN CORRECT THE SWEATY PART

“Bunny,” you greet, ducking your chin in a nod. Bucky gets out of the car, extending a hand to invite you inside.

this is so funnny like it was so casual kjfhgdkfj

“Did you get some sleep?” Bruce wonders, eyeing you at a red light. “Yeah, I drank some coffee,” you respond.

ma'am--

“It's no problem,” Bucky assures, wanting to keep examining the lines of your face, but you clear your throat, looking forward, and Bucky has no choice but to do so too.

he's so down bad after she insults him every sentence and calls him names. this is so real

Vision—who Bucky has heard is never wrong—sure seems wrong in whatever argument he’s just lost against you, and you know it.

i need to beat him in an argument. i don't care if im wrong i just need him to accept defeat

“Are you asking me to swing dance with you?” Bucky retorts.

HOW IS HE READY TO DANCE??? LIKE HE JUST KNOWS THIS???as someone who cant dance to save her life this is unfathomable to me

“First of all,” Bucky starts, beginning to list off his fingers. “We met two weeks and three days ago.”

put this man out of his misery look how absolutely clingy he is

“Maybe I wanted to switch things up,” Bucky defends. “And I’m not studying coaching. I’m studying biomedical engineering.”

funny how all of a sudden i'm super into him

“Yeah, what’s that about, by the wayt?” you wonder, setting your elbows on the table and dropping your face into your hands, cocking your head at him. “From what I’ve seen, you have your fair pick of girls and guys.”

AY YOOOOO BI BUCKY REP

“But I see it now. The charm. I’m not falling for it, but I see it.” You nod appreciatively and open your book once again to continue reading.

she may not be but i am a loser so i most definitely am !

“You are insufferable.” “And you’re beautiful.” “And you’re ridiculous.” “Go out with me, c’mon,” Bucky urges, smiling now. It’s stupidly sweet. You click your tongue. “Dates are a waste of time.” “I’ll make it worth it. Promise.” “I don’t have time to go out with guys I’ve talked to four times,” you explain.

this is so. 2000s coded. like i can see this playing out i cn HEAR them. i need this injected into my blood

“I will talk to you every single day from now on,” Bucky vows.

me when i get all steps wrong but end up at the right solution

James Buchanan Barnes. It rolls off your tongue too nicely all of a sudden.

HOOHOHOHOHOHOOHOHOHOHOH

but fr it really is a nice name. i just cannot understand why his mother would name him after the president (james buchanan was a president right???) but it works

asking you how Linda the librarian was and if she liked the cookie he got her three days ago.

You relay her enthusiastic message, deciding to brush over the wink and coy smile she sent you at his mention.

he's got librarians simping for him please 😭😭 tbf if someone gave me a cookie i'd give them access to my body too

Fingers wrap around your arm and you shriek, books slipping from your arms when they wane. Stumbling back, you tug yourself away from the intrusion, breaths coming out in big, wet gasps when you turn. Bucky’s wide blue eyes meet your glossy ones, hands up in surrender when he catches the tremble of your bottom lip.

BITCH WY WOULDNT U SAY HER NAME WHY SURPRISE HER ON THE ROAD IN THE DARK

“I'm just relieved it’s you,” you interrupt, fingers fisting his shirt. You’re far away, stuck in a memory very far away, and yet it feels enough like you’re standing in it. Your grip is a vice, forcing him closer still until the pads of your fingers can feel the warmth of his skin beneath his shirt. 

oh. she has a history there. is that why bruce is so hellbent on checking up on her

You look down at your lap, the left edge of your lips pulling into your cheek. “I was alone. It was easy.” What’s left to say seems painful for you to push out. “He didn’t like me very much.”

:(

You accept it as you mimic the sweet curve of his lips. “Ah, yes, and that’s how Barnacle gets ‘em. Being charming and funny and sweet—”

her fully confessing she thinks hes sweet and charming and funny

What’re you doing?” “You have to invite me in,” he explains. “What, like a vampire?” He blinks. “Yeah, like a vampire.” You grin toothily. “Vucky…” It drips in an exaggerated accent.

pls i laughed out loud at this

shes so guarded and walls-up and he's out there heart on his sleeve and ready to propose. otp

It’s startling the first time you miss Bucky's ever-constant presence.

no wait this is so real bc the first time i realised i missed a boy i imedatiely went 'what the fuck'

I really wanted Atlantis to be real when I was little,”

i still do hello. i completely believe it is real this is my flat earth thery sorry

“I like space,” Bucky offers. “It's endless.”

ocean girl x space boy........

Bucky turns to dig around in his bag, pulling out something small and bronze and shiny with a brilliant smile. ”I went to this little souvenir shop the other day and found one of those machines.” He extends it to you and flips it slowly between his index and middle. “It has a little fuzzy monster thing on it. I don’t get it, to be honest.”

FINE i will marry you

“Of course. I have been for months,” Bucky points out with a shrug.

MONTHSSSS??????? AND SHE DIDNT REALISE????? HES ROUTINE HES SET IN HER DAY NOW

“Weeks could definitely be months,” Bucky reasons.  You ignore him, stopping in your tracks. “Why?” A frown tugs at his lips as he pauses as well. “Because weeks add up to months?”

ksjhfdkjghkjghrkjhgrkjtg

“Right. Um, thanks again.” You take your things from him before he can think twice about it, speed walking to your door.

shes so emotionally repressed i want to shake her like a can of pringles

You’re being nice to him. Sticky nice. Not you-nice.

the fuck

You’d scoffed, blinked fast, and swatted him away. But you didn’t say no.

HMMMMMMMMMMMMM.

nectar, sticky in his throat.

i noticed a lot of sweetness imagery in this, angie. like honey, nectar and all. it really does paint a scene-- very warm and soft

“It’s just a meal.” He squints at you. “You never pass up a chance of food on me.” He presses the back of his palm against your forehead and leans in closer. “Are you feeling okay?”

SHES PANICKING GIRL SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW TO DEAL

You furrow your brows at him when you pop the lid off, barely realizing you’d never told him what to get. “You got me cavatappi pasta,” you realize. You look upset.

im grinning im crying screaming throwing up

“I have to go.” “What? We just got here.” “I have an appointment.” “For what?”

GIRL STAY THERE AND KISS HIM WHAT. WHAT IS THIS. SHARE THE COOKIE

“You hate cookies and pasta. You think they’re awful,” Bruce tries.

hes so cute im crying

ok i had to google what shape cavatappi is and I'm OBSESSED

“I didn't say anything.”

SAY IT BE THE FRIEND SHE NEEDS CALL HER OUT !!

Tugging your bottom lip between your teeth, you glance at your work again and then at the clock, taking a quick breath before you force yourself to write a quick conclusion you promise yourself you’ll revise when you get home.

LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

He says your name in surprise, shaking you gently as if to check that you’re real.

DO U WANT ME TO CRY BE HONEST

Bucky steps back, eyebrows furrowed as he notices what you’re holding. “Are those orange slices?”

wait thats so cute shut up aw

“Yeah. You told me about that and I thought maybe you’d like them.”

the mortifying ordeal of being known........

“Yeah,” Bucky agrees, hand drifting down to pull yours along. His skin is sticky and sweet against yours, orange juice smearing on your palm, but you can’t find it in you to care.

if i dont find some athlete who will hold my hands stained with orange juice. so help me god

Something like dumb, chest-puffed stubbornness tugs incessantly at you when you contemplate calling Bruce to come pick you up, a biting voice snapping pathetic for even thinking about it convincing you to shut the door behind you, locking away the choice of warmth and safety and shame.

call him girl omg get back into the building

When you blink, there’s the ghost of an unforgiving hand on the back of your neck, the sharp slam of your jaw against brick. You gasp when you open your eyes again, a hand flying to the aching skin of your neck as you spin.

i hope she finds a way to heal from this. i cant imagine how scarring this was

“Okay. For you and Bruce or just you?”

the way he knows where it is ltrly based on her preferences is so

If he were a little less in love, maybe he would; but he’s not, and the relief that you’re solid and no longer a tenuous voice on his phone is too much a relief.

ok this is a very serious scene but i read this and my heart went dfkjhgfkjhgkfjhgfkjhg this is reminding me of the 'if i loved you less, i may have been able to talk about it more'

You can’t help the way your eyes track down his arm. It’s scarred with angry raised lines, ending at his fingertips and disappearing into his shirt sleeve. 

kill me why dont u huh angie not them being vulnerable and open

Your fingers are wound tightly around Wanda’s arm, the nails digging into her sweater giving away what your face is trying to hide. You’re zeroed in on Bucky's figure as he runs across green after blurry white.

THE EVOLUTION OF HER NOT EVEN COMING TO GAMES TO BEING SO INVESTED IN THIS DUMBFUCK

You’re not worried.

oh bc i would be losing my mind rn

a mere play he put on for the free kick.

this is reminding me of that jamie tartt GIVE ME THE BALL PLEASE I WANT THE BALL

Except he hasn’t moved in a little while too long and you don’t think it’s ever taken him this long to fake it. Although, maybe it feels longer because you can’t take your eyes off his figure.

her unwavering confidence in this fellow and his antics. she sees right through him

“It’s fake,” you assure, fingers digging round shadows into your temples. “He’s doing his hero face, he’s completely fine.” It comes out more relieved than you thought it would.

SHE RECOGNISES HIS HERO FACE DKFJGHFJGH. THE FACT THAT HE EVEN HAS ONE HE'S SOOO LAME i need him

Unable to help yourself, you throw your arms around his neck, the prickling disappearing the moment you touch him. He is hot and solid in your arms, but most importantly completely fine.

imgiggling im crying im going through a lot rn no one talk to me

“What, did I scare you?” Bucky teases, smirk dropping when your deadpan doesn’t glitter with playfulness. “Doll?” “You took your sweet time getting back up,” you continue, ignoring his words. “You’ve never taken that long.” You’re alone in the hall now, eyes frenetic over his figure. His cheeks apple at your statement, amusement twinkling back in his eyes. “Of course. My girl knows I can't get hurt.”

THIS IS MAKING ME SHORTCIRCUIT

Bucky cringes. “You don’t really flirt back. I just want to make sure it’s not because I make you uncomfortable.”

girl she would have made it very clear i dont think she would have taken it if she didnt like it to some degree

“You think love isn’t worth it? That it’s a distraction?”

shes so me from 2018 i am actually reeling. it was actually on this very webbed site that my beloved mutual told me. "you can study and have a boyfriend. like, you can do both, you know that right?" and it rewired my brain chemistry

“But what if it is?”

sound logic soccer boy let's kiss

You want a moment to ponder it, because you know the right answer but you aren’t sure if you want to pick it. “Give what a chance?” you play dumb, but he doesn’t buy it.

SHES GOING TO DRAG IT OUT OF HIM OR DIE AVOIDING.

It would feel plain ignorant to do so—to not focus completely on the stitched pride in the dips of your smile or the warmth of your palms as they splay flat on his arm.

theyre so boyfrengirlfren coded wdym they arent DATING ET

Carol grins. “Yeah. Kind of hard not to when you describe it so thoroughly.”

YES SHES GETTING BULLIED FOR BEING PATHETICALLY IN LOVE TOO. I AM OBSESSED

“Best friend, huh? Bruce gonna be jealous?”

the annoyances to friends to lovers pipeline is soooo.........i am chewing glass i need them to touch mouth

“Impossible,” Bucky corrects completely unsubtly, but it’s soft, blurred by yellow light from above and buzz from you.

stab me why dont u

He clicks open the car. “And this’ll force ‘em to call an uber. Worst comes to worst, I’ll drop by later to force them home. I just want to get you home first. No drunk footballers to puke on your feet.”

kjfngjkfnhjkgfnhkfjgnhfkjn protective bucky being protective over his friends and saying he'll come back later like it's no big deal like WHY R U SO NICE

“I had to be able to drive you back.” He shrugs, cocking his head in the direction of the open car door.

i will climb you in this car james

His skin flips green.

angie im dumb as bricks i fully thought. "hulk??"

or do laundry or taxes or—anything as long as it’s with you.”

INVOKING EEAAO OHHHH YOU ARE SO EVIL FOR THIS ANGIE. I AM FROTHING AT THE MOUTH

Maybe you just can’t help yourself anymore. You kiss him.

FUCKING !!!!! YES!!!! FUINALLY LETS FUCINGG GO!!!!

“‘Had to make sure,” he mumbles against your lips. “This can’t happen when you aren’t you.”

OK CONSENT KING !

“I'll go out with you.”

i can now die happily

also!! your prose was so alight and quick, but there was also so much care that was put into it. like a painting. do you get me. a painting with honey.

tldr; angie marry me we can write a romcom together and i will make u so happy i promise

Flirting and Football- B. Barnes

Pairings: bucky barnes x reader Warnings: past assault of reader, as slow burn as i can, au so bucky is different although i tried to not make him so ooc, sort of enemies to lovers?, genuinely can’t remember anymore, crappy writing in the beginning because i started writing this a year ago but i swear it gets better i promise About: request!! Bucky barnes and a college au where reader is the only one who isn’t interested in him basically

The end of your pen rests between your lips, unused as you scan the textbook page in front of you, your eyes thinning occasionally as you read. Your study partner’s book lays open in front of her, ten pages behind, and notebook adorned with two sole words.

She’s reciting the events of a date she went on yesterday or the day before, although admittedly, you’d only caught detached words for the past double-digit minutes. Your careful attention had dwindled down to nods as you subtly tapped at your notebook, then not-so-subtly and finally disappeared altogether as you made miscellaneous noises. 

You hum along now, eyes flickering from your notes to the material as you annotate pages with bright sticky notes.

She doesn’t seem to notice your disinterest, gushing about arms and hair, and the kiss that changed her life. The words don’t last too long in your mind, too cluttered with equations and vocabulary to make space for them.

“The girls told me he goes on a lot of dates but I can just tell I’m the one.”

You glance at your open computer, frowning at the slimming battery life, and purse your lips at the time. Sighing softly, you meet Quinn’s glazed eyes, offering her a tight smile you hope is somewhat believable.

“Is he in psychology too?” you ask, tapping on the notes the both of you were supposed to start when she began talking.

“Bucky? Oh no,” she laughs, the finger twirling her red hair pulling away to wave her hand dismissively. “He’s in sports or something. He's on the soccer team, you know.”

You nod. “Wow.”

“I know, oh my god.” She fans herself. “Did I tell you he basically won the last game?”

Probably. You duck your chin, highlighting a sentence. “Isn’t it a group effort?”

Quinn rolls her eyes. “Well, yeah, but he scored the winning goal.”

“Okay then,” you agree, deciding that you can finish your notes at your dorm. “I didn’t go to the last game, so what do I know?”

Quinn’s eyes go wide. “You didn’t go?” she exclaims, and you shush her, confirming. “Why?”

You shrug. “I had to do something.”

“You have to go to the next one tomorrow and see him in action. But don’t fall in love,” she warns with a giggle. “He’s mine.”

“Promise,” you reply hollowly, shutting your laptop. “Well, I have to go. This was helpful, though,” you lie.

“Oh, yeah, totally. I have to go too, rest up for the big game tomorrow. Gotta be there early to support Bucky,” Quinn informs. You stack your books to carry them back to your dorm.

“Right,” you respond, standing. “I hope everything goes well with him,” you say as you walk out.

She shoots you a big grin and a nod, her face bright as she agrees.

It’s cold when you step through the doors, bouncing on your feet and hugging your things closer to your chest as you begin to walk toward your dorm. You move to pull out your phone from your back pocket, quickly unlocking it to get to your contacts list. You press on Bruce’s contact and listen to the two beeps until he picks up.

“I hate you so much right now,” you greet, cutting his cheery hello off.

“What? What did I do?”

“‘I’ll be there!’ ‘How could I miss studying physics?’” you mock, imitating his voice. “You left me there, and I was stuck listening to Quinn's monologue about how the quarterback or whatever is the love of her life!”

“What quarterback?” Bruce asks.

“Does it matter? Honestly?” you rebut, taking care to watch your surroundings as you bully your friend. “Your quarterback wouldn’t cheat on you so I’m assuming it’s one that’s not Thor.”

“Okay, okay, I know. I’m sorry about ditching you. Thor and I just finished, we can come by and pick you up at the library. And Thor is a defender. Different sport entirely.”

“Whatever and ew,” you complain. “And I’m already on my way. I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

“What? I told you to not walk home alone. Just wait for me.”

“Don’t worry. The dorm isn’t that far and you’re not exactly the most threatening anyway,” you remind. “I’ll be fine. ”

“Fine. Keep me on the line and be careful,” Bruce tells you.

“Of course,” you quip. A pause drapes over the two of you, the silence only interrupted by the steady sound of your footsteps on the concrete. You turn, leaves crunching underneath your shoes and you can practically hear Bruce relax somewhat, knowing that you’re nearby. You put him on speaker to hear better. “How’d it go with Thor today?”

“Really good.” The golden thread of happiness threaded through Bruce’s words comes through clear and clean. You can imagine him as he talks into the phone, glancing at Thor to make sure he can’t hear as he plays with his fingers. “I’m really sorry for leaving you there.”

“You’re not,” you amend. “But it’s fine. I’m glad you’re happy.”

“I am,” Bruce confirms.

“I don’t know how you find the time to juggle everything. It’s kind of terrifying,” you laugh, expecting him to tease you back, but his answer comes back honest.

“I know you think of boyfriends and whatever as distractions, but it’s the opposite. It’s not juggling if I have help carrying everything.”

You push your tongue against your cheek, listening to the rustling of the trees. You grab your keys as you arrive at your dorm door. “I’m here.”

“Finally.” You roll your eyes, opening the door to see your roommate and her brother inside.

“Hey Wanda, Piet.”

Wanda smiles at you and Pietro winks before greeting Bruce through your phone.

“Okay, Bruce, are we studying tomorrow?” you ask him, balancing your things in your arms. When Pietro notices, he stands, taking your books from you and setting them down on your table. You thank him and pat his arm.

“Before the game? Sure,” he replies. You take him off speaker, pulling your phone to your ear, not noticing that the mention of the game has caught Pietro and Wanda's attention.

“You’re going?” you question. “I thought Thor was benched.”

“He’s off!” There’s a whoop you recognize as Thor’s that makes you smile. “Which is why it’s an important game we need to go to.”

“We?” you echo.

“We as in you and I,” Bruce verifies.

“Wait, I have to go too? Why?” you whine.

Pietro cuts in, “You have to go! How will we win without our lucky charm?”

You purse your lips and squint at him. “Didn’t you guys win last game?”

“Still! Come on, please,” he insists. Wanda joins in, offering to bake you cookies.

You search your brain for excuses. “I have things to do.”

“If it’s not ‘stay home and binge a series,’ I'll let you skip,” Bruce chimes.

You frown as the siblings grin.

“Yeah, you’re going,” Bruce declares. “They’re not that bad and you know it. Besides, Thor wants you to braid his hair. You know my fingers always get tangled.”

“Fine,” you sigh dramatically. “But I want it noted that it’s only because I really like cookies.” You focus on Wanda, who nods enthusiastically. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” Bruce repeats your words before you hang up, and at the click, you let yourself fall on your couch.

Wanda kisses your head and pats your shoulder comfortingly. “It’s going to be fun.”

“Standing in the middle of students I don’t know as they yell at a ball does not sound fun to me,” you disagree, but she ignores you.

“Even Vis is going,” she argues. “And you know how excited Thor gets when you braid his hair.”

You mutter incoherently.

“We’ll leave at three,” she instructs with a smile.

-

“I could be doing so many useful things right now,” you hiss at Bruce, remembering the half-written essay you have saved on your laptop, a string of frustratedly typed letters highlighted and waiting to be replaced with something coherent typed just beneath it.

Bruce had made you leave just as you began to taste the word you were looking for, assuring you that going out to see a game would somehow give your fried mind the jolt it needed. With little argument and the promise you’d committed to with a hook of your pinkie, you’d sighed and shut your laptop, leaving your apartment early to see the team before the game.

You could recognize some faces thanks to Pietro forcing you out to a few team celebrations and the occasional game you never paid much attention to. Although he’d laid off a while ago when Bruce and Thor started dating, your best friend had dragged you to every soccer-related event he didn’t want to go to alone. Pietro never minded your absence as much as Bruce did, always satisfied as long as you celebrated or consoled him afterward.

The word you’d been wracking your brain for suddenly comes to mind when you sit next to Bruce on a bench, pulling your phone out of your pocket to note it down, not noticing when the entire soccer team begins to leave the locker room, spilling into the hall where you’re slumped with your best friend.

Thor bellows your name excitedly when he spots you both, heading over. You glance up to give him a smile, quickly continuing to type the stray thoughts you’d been trying to catch when he turns, an extravagant arm extending as if to present you to the few guys with him. “This is the lovely lady I told you all about. She is very smart.”

You laugh at his introduction, tucking your phone back into your pocket. “Thank you, Thor.”

“Of course! And you all know Bruce, of course.”

There are chimes of agreement and greetings for your friend, a few of the players coming up to you. Pietro arrives first, as always, and pecks your forehead. “I, for one, am very glad you came to cheer us on.”

“We’ve heard a lot about you,” another says, huge and blonde, but his features are softened by an open grin. “I’m Steve.” He juts a finger at the brunet next to him, his hair tied up into a neat little bun at the nape of his neck, blue eyes shining as they observe you. “That’s Bucky.”

You smile at them, nodding. “Nice to meet you. I’ve actually heard a lot.”

Bucky raises an eyebrow, pleasantly surprised. “Really?”

You stare at him blankly, opening and closing your mouth like a fish. “I meant Steve.” Steve looks startled. “I saw his work when I was volunteering at the art show last month. It was great, I actually bought the piece with the lilies!”

“Oh.” Bucky blinks blankly, tongue poking into his cheek before he clears his throat and manages a lift of the left edge of his lips. “‘Makes sense someone so pretty would have good taste.”

You stare silently at him for a second, relieved when Steve’s surprise takes a second to process.

“Wait, me?” Steve points stupidly at himself. “My art?”

“It was amazing, I couldn’t let it slip by!”

“I told you,” Bucky tells him, elbowing his arm. He, unlike the other players, wears a dark sleeve over the entirety of his left arm, all the way up to his fingers. His fingertips, jagged pink, peek out. “I wish you woulda let me go. I could’ve seen the art and met her sooner.”

His friend sends him a furtive glance. “Is this your first time coming to a game?” Steve wonders as he turns back to you. 

You shake your head. “Pietro is my roommate’s brother and Thor’s my best friend’s boyfriend. They drag me here when they feel like it, but it’s my first time being back here.” You gesture to the hall. “I’m usually a little late because Bruce drives like a grandmother.”

Bruce sighs, sending you a short glance that you respond to with a gentle nudge of his shoulder.

Blue eyes nods, careful to give you his full attention. “Well, I think you should come around more often.”

You scan him for a second. “Why?” you ask genuinely.

He pauses as he begins to explain, eyes pinched in confusion before Thor’s booming voice cuts him off, reminding you that you need to braid his hair. You give them a final smile before standing. “Duty calls, I guess.”

“So you’ll come around?” He calls after you, frowning when you respond with a transparent smile and ingenuine thumbs up. “Huh,” he says.

“What?” Steve responds, a little slowly, knowingly. He knows well what is making Bucky’s features crease in that way, but he’d prefer hearing it from his friend’s mouth.

“Just… wondering why I’d never seen her before. Pretty.”

“Uh huh.” Steve nods disbelievingly. Knowing he isn’t going to be able to push it out of his friend, he begins to walk toward the field, not waiting up for Bucky, the man caught up in his thoughts. “‘Thought it was because the line didn’t work,” he finally tells him, catching Bucky’s attention.

“What’re you talkin’ about, punk? What line?”

Steve snickers. “Any of ‘em.”

-

The next time Bucky sees you is across the courtyard, arms wrapped around books, your fingers curved protectively around the edges of your laptop. You struggle as you talk to someone he recognizes, bouncing lightly on the balls of your feet as you reach to brush strands of hair away from your eyes.

Why you don’t have a backpack like every other person is beyond him, but it’s the last thing on his mind when your eyes meet his and you smile and wave. Yeah, he knows how to handle this—the attention, the blushing, the flattery.

The hand he raises to wave back freezes awkwardly when he realizes your attention isn’t on him, but rather following something behind his shoulder. His hand lowers as he feels Pietro brush past him and over to you, Wanda following close by. She catches Bucky’s actions and sends him an amused look.

You accept the kiss Pietro drops on your forehead and greet Wanda excitedly, too busy chatting with her to notice the two pens that slip from your pile.

Bucky sniffs, tugging his varsity jacket tighter and deciding to embrace his mistake, walks over to you.

“Hey,” he greets, your name coming out like silk, shooting you a smile. He bends down to pick up your pens, handing them to you with a cajoling rise of his lips.

You return it a pause later. “Hey, um—thanks…” you struggle for a second before you’re cut off.

“Bucky!” the classmate that you were talking to exclaims, and Bucky realizes it’s Quinn, the girl he’d gone out on a date with a while ago. “I saw you on the field yesterday,” she tells him, twirling a strand of red hair around her finger. “You were amazing.”

“I appreciate it,” he thanks her, his eyes flickering back to you for a second, spotting you beginning to step away with a short wave and an elbow to Wanda's side. “I should go, I needed to talk to her,” he starts, acting quickly. “But it was nice to see you again. You look great, I like your necklace.”

Quinn’s fingers reach to pinch at the pendant on her chain, tilting her head at Bucky as she beams. “Thank you!”

Bucky nods, turning to find you gone. He looks around, surprised, but finally catches sight of you turning a corner with your friends. Before he can head toward you, Quinn catches his arm.

“Aren’t you going to ask me out again?” She smiles at him, eyes wide and shiny.

He winces, forcing himself to not glance back at you. “You’re a really great girl, Quinn, but I don’t think we’d work out. I’m sorry.”

“Oh,” Quinn says quietly, not returning the apologetic smile he sends her. He twists his lips and apologizes again before jogging over to you, slowing to match your pace when he finally catches up.

“Hey again,” he quips, offering you a smile. You return it kindly, twirling your pens between your fingers.

“Hey, Bucky.” Probably accidentally, you enunciate his name in a way that makes him realize you didn’t remember it when he came up to you earlier, and he bites back an embarrassed blush. “It was a good game yesterday.”

“Thank you,” he replies easily. “How was I?”

You cock your head at him. “Fine? You… were a soccer player.”

Pietro laughs, pulling you closer. “He’s asking if he lived up to the stories,” he clarifies, shooting Bucky a look. “‘Does another pretty girl think I’m great too?’” he mocks, the imitation edged in his accent.

You hum in understanding, turning back to Bucky. “Stories?” you echo. Your features bear no likeness to the pull Bucky is used to with girls, nothing implying the agreement or validation he’s usually welcomed with.

“Oh, you know,” Bucky starts with a nonchalant shrug, “of the ‘insane stamina’ and ‘could totally carry a bus’ variety. You know, the ‘Winter Soldier’ name.”

Your eyebrows raise. “‘Winter Soldier?’” you repeat, words bolded in an unconscious drama.

“’S my nickname,” Bucky explains sheepishly. You continue to stare at him for a second before cracking a smile.

“Bucky Barnes, right?” you ask him. He pushes his tongue against his cheek at the blow to his ego and nods. “Which one were you again? All the uniforms are the same, I can only recognize Thor and Piet.”

Pietro hoots. “Fifteen, baby!”

Bucky eyes you, his cheeks pulling with an amused lilt. “You wound me, doll.”

“I wound you?” you giggle, unable to help it. “This is our first conversation and I have the power to wound you. I don’t know how I feel about having this power over a stranger.”

Bucky gasps, reaching out to grab your hand with his ungloved hand and wrap it around an invisible knife to plunge it into his chest. He chokes as he mimes nursing his wound. “Just digging it in deeper, aren’t you? Vixen.”

“Oh, come on, you expect me to have learned your number after knowing you for five minutes?” you exclaim with mild indignance, a whisper of amusement betraying it. You click your tongue. “You were fine, I’m sure,” you respond finally. Wanda jabs an elbow into your arm and whispers something to you. Your eyes light up. “Oh, you’re seventeen! The ball hogger! You do realize you’re in a team, right?”

Pietro claps, nodding approvingly at you. “And me, little flower?”

You roll your eyes. “You were fast. Like always.”

“That’s code for ‘the best out there,’” Pietro tells Bucky.

“I think the code for that is Bucky Barnes,” Bucky retorts, turning back to you. “‘Got a favorite player yet?” He asks you.

You tilt a brow at him. “On the soccer team?”

“Yeah,” Bucky confirms.

“Based off of what?” You counter.

“Anything.”

“Oh.” You think. “Then no.”

Pietro clears his throat loudly.

“What if I get you the best seat possible next game?” Bucky offers.

You laugh, shaking your head. “I’m good where I am.”

“She barely pays attention anyway,” Wanda informs. “All she does is complain.”

You nod. “And I can do that in any seat.”

“Alright… what if you wear my jersey at the next game?” Bucky continues.

You raise an eyebrow. “And you’re convincing me, right?”

“You should be swooning right now,” Bucky argues accusingly, but his words are tinged with a grin.

“Oh, my bad,” you deadpan, placing a hand on your chest and rocking on your heels. You flutter your lashes at him and melt your lips into a watery smile. “Oh my, golly! Benson’s sweaty jersey!”

“Bucky,” Bucky grumbles. “Bucky’s sweaty jersey.”

“Right,” you reply with an attentive nod, laughing quietly. Your attention is drawn by another building and you turn. “I gotta go, but please keep the jersey far away from me.” You point at Bucky and then wave at Wanda and Pietro. “I’ll see you guys around.”

“Me too!” Bucky shouts after you. You only reply with a thumbs up Bucky can tell is sarcastic even if he can’t see your face, slipping past a closing door. Bucky purses his lips, looking after you. “Huh.”

A hand slaps down on his shoulder, and Pietro's laughter bubbles from behind him. “Nice work,” he lies.

-

Entirely suddenly, your mind feels vignetted with inky stress. You suppose it was predictable, having ignored the weight your responsibilities had lain on your shoulders for as long as you had, but it’s exhausting nonetheless. You blink slowly at your document in a lousy attempt to soothe yourself, feeling as though you were staring at it through a tunnel.

You yawn as you splay yourself out on your bed, stretching your legs out as far as you can. Your fingertips brush your pillows as you let your eyelids fall closed for just a second, thoughts and reminders of the rest of the things you need to do lining your entrance to sleep, but the door is so inviting, the red tape of your to-do list blurring.

Your ringtone cuts in when you begin to reason with yourself, back straightening fast enough to give you whiplash when you open your eyes again. Your hand slams around your phone, blinking fast as you read Bruce’s contact name.

“The thing,” you mumble, remembering Bruce’s insistence that you went to something. You answer his call and fight to not let yourself fall back on your bed, free fingers moving to rub at your temple.

“Hey, are you ready?” Bruce asks, the sounds of conversation in the background.

“Sure,” you answer tiredly, looking down at yourself. Whoever it is you’re going out with can’t be too picky. “Ready for what again?”

“The team’s win? We’re going out to eat at an actual restaurant and everything.”

You purse your lips. “Are we going to a bar?”

There’s a moment of silence on his end, only highlighted by the muffled voices that converse. “...No.”

Nodding earnestly, you stand, stretching and shaking your limbs out in an attempt to wake yourself up, but the attempt is mocked when you yawn once again. You catch a glimpse of your reflection in the mirror and wince, tilting your chin up to get another angle. “Then, yes, I’m ready. I guess.”

“That's great!” Bruce praises. “Because we are outside.”

You frown, grabbing a hair tie from your dresser before walking out of your room, surprised to see your apartment empty. “We?” you repeat as you look around, confused. “Are Wan and Pietro with you?”

“They’re probably already there. And ‘we’ as in I picked up Thor, Steve, and Bucky.”

You grunt in response, shutting off the lights and plucking your keys from the counter before locking up.

“You know Bucky. He’s not that bad.”

There are sounds of protest and you catch an offended ‘that bad?’ before you hang up, waving to Bruce’s car. The door to the back opens before you can touch the handle, a grinning face and shiny blue eyes welcoming you. “Hey, doll, you look great.”

“Bunny,” you greet, ducking your chin in a nod. Bucky gets out of the car, extending a hand to invite you inside.

“I don’t mind that one.” Bucky winks.

You shake your head, crawling inside and saying hi to Steve, nose wrinkling when you realize you’ll be sandwiched between the two guys, and turning when you notice Bucky getting in again. You tug on your seatbelt with a polite smile to Steve, bumping into hard muscle when you aim for the buckle.

“You tryna cop a feel? Could’ve just asked,” Bucky tells you, bumping you gently.

“Oh please,” you scoff, poking him with the metal thing. “Excuse me, seatbelt. Bruce isn’t that great of a driver. He’s in his twenties and gets night blindness.”

Bucky pats your hand gently and takes the belt from you, clicking it into place for you.

“Nice and safe, don’t worry, doll.”

You set your lips into a thin line and look straight ahead, pushing your phone into the space between your thighs so you don’t lose it. “How’d you do on your Norse mythology exam, Thor?” you ask, recalling the nerves with which he’d told you about it a couple of days ago.

“Wonderful! I really enjoy the subject. Thank you for helping me study,” Thor replies cheerily.

“You didn’t even need to,” you assure, stifling a yawn. Bucky frowns.

“Did you get some sleep?” Bruce wonders, eyeing you at a red light.

“Yeah, I drank some coffee,” you respond.

“Not the same thing. Not even close.”

You laugh. “I’ll be fine,” you promise. “Stop worrying.”

“I’m always worried,” Bruce grumbles.

“Hey, how was art today?” you ask Steve, nudging his arm gently. Bucky’s brows furrow, urging Steve to look at him and read his mind with an intense stare. Steve does not.

“You were right. I was being too judgemental,” Steve sighs. “I should’ve listened to you.”

“Listened to who?” Bucky buts in. “How did you know Stevie had art today?” he continues, trying to keep his tone light.

“We talk.” You shrug. 

“Oh,” Bucky starts, glaring at Steve. “Do you?”

“Yes.” You nod before actually yawning that time. “I’m sorry.”

“You should sleep more,” Bucky comments, watching you shake your head wearily.

“I have things to do,” you defend. “I sleep enough, it’s the stupid car ride, I always fall asleep in cars,” you defend. “But if it pleases you, I’ll sleep the entirety of tomorrow.” Your voice lacks the thick sleeve of satire you tend to use with him, more vulnerable in your exhaustion. Although your request is still sarcastic, Bucky can tell you know you need it.

“It will,” Bucky says.

For the most part, the conversation ends there, the group splitting into their own things during the car ride. After a few minutes, Bucky feels your head fall softly on his shoulder.

He stops paying attention to what Thor is saying, instead focusing on the way you edge toward him in your sleep, nudging your nose into his shoulder. He can see the way your lashes lay on your cheeks when you’re so close and the pretty bridge of your nose.

You’re more open than he’s ever seen you, eyes shut and lips parted with gentle breaths, and he can’t stop staring at you.

Then the car goes over a harsh bump, and Bucky wants to do everything he can to hold you still, but your eyes flutter open and you sit up, meeting his eyes for a second. “Sorry.”

“It's no problem,” Bucky assures, wanting to keep examining the lines of your face, but you clear your throat, looking forward, and Bucky has no choice but to do so too.

-

The surprise Bucky feels when he spots you at the celebration party is no match for the sweet excitement at the bottom of his stomach, immediately pulling his sleeve further down over his arm and brushing away loose strands of his hair. It would be embarrassing how much he cares about what you think of him if it weren’t so ridiculously important to him.

He busies himself with getting a drink for you, finding himself wondering if you’d come before, only to go unnoticed by him. There’s a startling burst of anger at himself with the thought, and Bucky blinks, eyes continuing to drift to you. Resolute, he moves toward you but pauses as he observes you.

The look on your face is one Bucky has never seen before—though he hasn’t seen many looks on your face before—but it settles so naturally on your features that it is difficult to argue that it’s unfamiliar. You look intense, but the way your eyes scan Wanda's boyfriend—who’s been dubbed Vision—is dangerous. Cocky.

You say something and your entire face relaxes resolutely, but your eyes remain expectant and arrogant, unamused with your companion’s reply.

Vision—who Bucky has heard is never wrong—sure seems wrong in whatever argument he’s just lost against you, and you know it.

“How’re my favorite geniuses?” Wanda pipes up suddenly, forcing Bucky’s daze away, appearing from an unknown place to sling an arm around you. You snap out of the look, your face softening, but the pleasure of being right dances across your features. Bucky clears his throat and takes a sip from his beer, stepping toward you.

“Oh, you know, out-geniusing the other,” you reply, glancing at Bucky as he walks up behind Vision.

“Hey Dolly,” he smiles. “I thought you had too many books to read to go out.”

“I finished them all,” you respond. “And ‘Dolly’? How old are you?”

Bucky clicks his tongue. “What would you prefer, sweetheart?”

“My name,” you state, then squint at him, cocking your head. “Do you remember it? I imagine it’s hard to keep track.”

“Of course I remember.” Bucky scoffs. “I don’t think I could forget.”

You breathe out a laugh. “Right, I’d imagine asking her out to swing dance without it would be pretty hard.”

“Are you asking me to swing dance with you?” Bucky retorts.

You snort. “Yeah, sure.”

Bucky holds out his hand expectantly, covered arm at his side.

Your eyes thin resolutely at him, scrutinizing the details of his face before you shake your head. “You’re ridiculous,” you criticise.

His hand drops and he pouts. “C’mon, pretty please.”

“Do you know what music you swing dance to?” you ask him, wagging a finger to refer to the booming music drowning most sounds inside the house. “Because this isn’t it.”

“I need to take advantage of the fact that you’re here, doll. You said so yourself you don’t go out much,” he complains. 

“Yeah, this is why!” you reply, your last words getting louder as the music impossibly gains volume.

“What?!” Bucky shouts, moving closer to hear you better, but you laugh and shake your head, telling him something he can’t make out. When you realize he can’t hear you, you give him a pout.

“And I was just about to say yes,” you say sadly.

“Wha—” Bucky’s cut off by the sharp shattering of glass. With a cringe, your eyes widen as you look behind him, eyes flickering back to him expectantly. He turns and groans. “I have to check that out. I’ll be right back!” he pledges, walking away to see a deadly amount of broken alcohol bottles on the floor, the stench of their contents burning his nose.

When he comes back, you’re gone.

The disappointment that blankets over his shoulders at the fact is just as surprising to him.

-

You’re in your bubble at the library, a little clueless to everything going on around you as you thumb the corner of a page, your pinky hovering below your book’s cover. You’re a few pages away from something exciting, teeth digging in with anticipation for it, when someone enters your field of vision, a large figure plopping down on a seat in front of you.

You spare them a glance and are surprised to find Bucky, sporting a large grin and his varsity jacket. You observe him suspiciously for a few moments, having never seen him even near the library, before returning your attention to what you’re reading.

“So, you’re actually here, huh?” he asks, and you shush him, shooting him a look to lower his voice. “Sorry.”

“Why are you here?” you question lowly instead, still not putting down your book.

“Anyone can come to the library.” Bucky points out, your name playfully scornful. You level a look at him.

“Yes. Why are you here? With me? You didn’t know my name until, like, two days ago.” You’re careful to keep your voice down.

“First of all,” Bucky starts, beginning to list off his fingers. “We met two weeks and three days ago.”

“Did we?” you drone, attempting to concentrate on the lines of your book once more.

“And, how do you know we don’t just have alternating study days?” Bucky points out.

“I am here every day,” you inform. “And if that were the case, why would you be here right now?” you rebut. “What would you be studying for? Coaching?”

“Maybe I wanted to switch things up,” Bucky defends. “And I’m not studying coaching. I’m studying biomedical engineering.”

You meet his eyes at the revelation, unable to keep the surprise off your face. You fold down the edge of the last page you read offhandedly and let your book flutter closed. “What? Quinn said you were in… sports.”

“Well,” Bucky sucks in a breath as if what he’s about to tell you is a revelation. “Soccer is a sport.”

“I know,” you affirm blandly. “But are you actually in biomedical?”

“Yeah,” Bucky nods. “What, do you not believe me?” he asks, raising a gloved hand to his chest. “I must say, I’m very disappointed in you perpetuating harmful stereotypes.”

“I’m just surprised. You’ve never talked about it before.”

“We’ve talked four times,” Bucky points out. “Although I want it clear that I have tried to make it more.”

“Yeah, what’s that about, by the wayt?” you wonder, setting your elbows on the table and dropping your face into your hands, cocking your head at him. “From what I’ve seen, you have your fair pick of girls and guys.”

“I wouldn’t say that—”

You laugh quietly. “Sure.”

“But I like you,” Bucky explains, shrugging. “You’re smart and pretty and you interest me.”

You scan his face, squinting. Astonishment tints your chuckle. “You are so much better at this than I thought you were.”

“Sorry?”

“At first, I was like ‘this guy? This is the Becky people won’t shut up about?’”

“Bucky,” he corrects swiftly.

“But I see it now. The charm. I’m not falling for it, but I see it.” You nod appreciatively and open your book once again to continue reading.

Bucky frowns in front of you, reaching over to insert an abrupt hand in between the pages. “What are you talking about?”

Sighing, you peel his fingers off the pages and meet his eyes, startled to see their intensity, crinkles at their edges, his lips pinched in a pout. You gasp. “Oh my god, you’re doing it now.”

“Sweetheart, it’s something that just happens naturally, I’m not doing anything.”

You stare at him for a moment before shaking your head, turning back to your book. “You are insufferable.”

“And you’re beautiful.”

“And you’re ridiculous.”

“Go out with me, c’mon,” Bucky urges, smiling now. It’s stupidly sweet.

You click your tongue. “Dates are a waste of time.”

“I’ll make it worth it. Promise.”

“I don’t have time to go out with guys I’ve talked to four times,” you explain.

“Alright, so if I talk to you more, you’ll go out with me?”

You wrinkle your nose. “I don’t… I’m not liking where this is going.”

“I will talk to you every single day from now on,” Bucky vows.

“Oh, I was right,” you groan. “I just mean you don’t know me. My favorite color, my favorite book, my order at my favorite restaurant, things like that.”

“I will know all of that,” he pledges.

You laugh disbelievingly. “Okay, Borky.”

A cocky little smirk plays on his lips as he winks. “Bucky,” he says archly.

-

You learn his name. Completely. Totally. Unmistakably. 

It’s hard not to, not when he becomes a constant in your life and not with a name like that.

James Buchanan Barnes. It rolls off your tongue too nicely all of a sudden.

He talks to you every day. Just like he said he would, even if it’s a two-minute conversation over text where he makes sure you get home safe and asks about your day. It would be overwhelming if it didn’t make you smile so much.

He doesn’t get upset when you answer two hours later because you were distracted with work, asking you how Linda the librarian was and if she liked the cookie he got her three days ago.

You relay her enthusiastic message, deciding to brush over the wink and coy smile she sent you at his mention. Then maybe, because you’re finished with your work for the day, you shove aside your notebook and bite back a small smile when he tells you how pretty he thought you looked in the glimpses he had of you today.

Organizing your books into a neat little pile, you message him and Bruce that you’re heading home. And you intend to, you really do, but then Bucky insists you call him the next time so he can walk you home, and you’ve suddenly been sitting at your table, uselessly leaning against your things for ten minutes.

You shoot up when you realize, lightly bewildered with yourself, gathering everything into your arms as quickly as possible, and shoving your phone into your back pocket. You hope Bruce isn’t getting too worried as you push open the library doors, hurrying down the steps and onto the path you usually take. You’re alert as always, careful to listen past the crunching of leaves beneath your feet and watch for shadows that edge past yours, digging your keys out of your pocket to hold them in the spaces between your fingers.

It’s three minutes in when you begin to feel unsettled. Your phone has vibrated three times in your back pocket in the past two minutes, but the darker section of your path is coming up, and chills rush up your neck as you imagine what the distraction could cost.

A shadow follows nearby, inching closer and closer until your hands are shaking and you’re on the verge of running.

Fingers wrap around your arm and you shriek, books slipping from your arms when they wane. Stumbling back, you tug yourself away from the intrusion, breaths coming out in big, wet gasps when you turn. Bucky’s wide blue eyes meet your glossy ones, hands up in surrender when he catches the tremble of your bottom lip.

A tear streaks down your cheek in profusing relief that it’s only him, the anger indistinguishable beneath it as you stumble into Bucky on wobbly knees, his name braided in a whimper. His arms settle around you hesitantly, guiltily.

“You scared me,” you whisper. “Don’t you know not to sneak up on people?”

“I'm sorry,” he replies sincerely. “I didn’t think—”

“I'm just relieved it’s you,” you interrupt, fingers fisting his shirt. You’re far away, stuck in a memory very far away, and yet it feels enough like you’re standing in it. Your grip is a vice, forcing him closer still until the pads of your fingers can feel the warmth of his skin beneath his shirt. 

Bucky murmurs your name, a large palm stroking up and down your back in comfort. His voice is mournful. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

You snap out of it at the nickname, pulling away from his embrace as if you’d awoken. He doesn’t startle, only stares at the furrow of your brow and the light that reflects off of your cheeks. Swallowing hard, you blink away the rest of your daze, eyes falling on your things scattered on the ground.

“My computer,” you remember, frantically dropping to your knees to search for it.

Bucky doesn’t pry, kneeling next to you to help pick up your books, taking the ones you’d stacked up sloppily into his arms. You carry your laptop with a careful grip, relatively unharmed.

“I should get going,” you tell him, motioning to take your things from him but he refuses, ushering you into his car.

It’s silent for a while after you halfheartedly agree, obviously still embarrassed. Bucky’s hesitant to probe, but the guilt at what he could’ve reminded you of gnaws at his gut.

You can feel his stare each time he glances at you curiously; cautiously, as if you’ll burst into tears spontaneously. 

“I was attacked once.” Your voice is quiet, soft for the obvious teeth the words pierce you with. “Walking home from the library,” you explain. “It’s why Bruce doesn’t like me walking home alone.”

“You… someone…” Bucky pinches his lips into a tense line, fingers tightening around the wheel. “Why?” It’s painfully incredulous.

You look down at your lap, the left edge of your lips pulling into your cheek. “I was alone. It was easy.” What’s left to say seems painful for you to push out. “He didn’t like me very much.”

“I'm sorry,” Bucky offers after a tense second, unsure of what else to say and how angry he can be for you.

“For what? You didn’t have anything to do with it,” you retort, offering him a weak smile in an attempt to lighten the mood.

“For scaring you,” Bucky insists sincerely. “For the fact that it happened in the first place.” You don’t respond, watching as trees and lights flash past the window.

“It really wasn’t as bad as you think. The label makes it seem worse,” you palliate. “He hit me once and pushed me against a wall. A bruise was the worst of it. Both physically and to my bank account.”

Bucky’s frown stays, quiet blanketing the both of you.

“So, why’d you come get me? How’d you know I was only on my way?” you chime suddenly.

“I wanted to check up on you. You weren’t answering your phone.”

You pause, meeting his eyes with an inquisitive pinch to your features. “So you drove to find me?”

“Technically, I just wanted to drop by your apartment to make sure you got home safe, but that sounds better, so let’s go with it.” Bucky shoots you a grin. An olive branch.

You accept it as you mimic the sweet curve of his lips. “Ah, yes, and that’s how Barnacle gets ‘em. Being charming and funny and sweet—”

He lets a light chuckle slip past his lips, sparing you a delicate glance. You’re already looking at him, softer in your gaze than he’s ever seen you.

He hums inquisitively. “You think I'm charming and funny and sweet?”

You laugh openly, shaking your head but not negating his words. You hug your laptop closer to your chest, constellations reflected in your shadowed eyes as you look through the window. “I think—” you inhale in relief. “We’re here.”

Bucky slows to a stop when he reaches your dorm, shutting off the car and stepping out as you pack up. You only notice his actions when your fingers slip past the handle once you move to open your own door, huffing air out of your nose when he smirks wantonly at you.

“Thank you,” you grunt, climbing out and clutching your things.

You walk ahead, listening to the door slam and the subsequent sound of shoes quick against the pavement until he walks steadily beside you. “So, you wanna do that again soon?”

You laugh, motioning to grab your keys. “Do what again?”

He steals the jingling set from your fingers, moving hurriedly to the door when you make a noise hald surprise half indignation. He jams a silver one in, cringing when it doesn’t fit. You glower as you reach him, eyeing his hands as they continue to shove the wrong key in the lock. “It's the bronze one—no, the other one. How do you not—”

The door swings open, a satisfied smile parting Bucky’s face.

“Thanks,” you sigh, taking back your keys as you step inside. He stands outside awkwardly, kicking a pebble around with his foot. You squint doubtfully at him after you’ve set your things down and he’s not following behind you like you thought he would be. “What’re you doing?”

“You have to invite me in,” he explains.

“What, like a vampire?”

He blinks. “Yeah, like a vampire.”

You grin toothily. “Vucky…” It drips in an exaggerated accent.

“It's cold out here,” he reminds.

“Maybe you should go home then,” you suggest.

His face drops for a second and you find yourself feeling a tug of something sickening at your stomach. Like a reflex, the offer leaves your throat before you can help it.

“Or. Come inside.” At his hesitant posture, you suck in a bubble of air. “Do you want to come in? You’re welcome to.” I want you to.

He stares at you long enough for you to squirm before a smile breaks through his face. “Really?”

You bite the inside of your cheek, flimsy regret already churning in your gut. “Yeah. Just come on in already. It’s cold outside, dummy.”

-

It’s startling the first time you miss Bucky's ever-constant presence.

You’d rather not admit it, but it’s hard not to—not when he finds you between classes to carry your books, teasing you about your lack of a backpack but always leaving you with only your laptop and a pen in hand. You can’t help the smiles when he “coincidentally” bumps into you at your favorite coffee shop enough times to have your order ready when you arrive on your tea day.

His goofy jokes while you study at the library get less annoying and, annoyingly, more endearing. You suddenly know a whole lot about biomedical engineering and Bucky. You know his sister’s favorite color and can spout stories about Steve before he grew five times his size like you were there yourself.

It's infuriating, you think, but you don’t mind as much when Bucky's making you laugh with lovely crinkles at the edges of his eyes.

“I like the ocean,” you say sometime at the library, books spread on the table, ignored. He looks up from his notebook in surprise, putting down the pen you’d lent him two weeks ago. “It’s the reason why my favorite color is blue.”

His own blue glitters as he nods, listening. “‘Thought it was because of my eyes.”

You reward him a laugh and a roll of your eyes. “I really wanted Atlantis to be real when I was little,” you tell him. “And mermaids. Even if they were the ugly ones that murder you,” You confess in a rare moment of transparency, meeting his eyes before you clear your throat, bringing your attention back to your laptop.

“I like space,” Bucky offers. “It's endless.”

You nod in acceptance, clearing your throat as if to rid yourself of what you’ve given him.

“You collect those squished pennies, right?” Bucky asks. 

You’re startled that he remembers, and it takes a second for your brain to catch up. “Uh—yeah. Why?” 

Bucky turns to dig around in his bag, pulling out something small and bronze and shiny with a brilliant smile. ”I went to this little souvenir shop the other day and found one of those machines.” He extends it to you and flips it slowly between his index and middle. “It has a little fuzzy monster thing on it. I don’t get it, to be honest.”

It never crossed your mind that he would do that for you. A startling line of electricity runs up your arm when your fingers meet his, quick to take the penny from him. “Thank you,” you mutter, observing the coin in the light. The large eyes of the embossed little monster stare back at you. “This is really nice of you.”

“It’s not big deal,” Bucky shrugs. “I just thought you’d like it.”

Honey fills your throat. Gulping, you glance at the clock, nearly relieved to see it’s time for you to leave. “I gotta go,” you tell him, gathering your things. The smooth edges of the penny dig into your palm. He stands in tandem, rolling his shoulders.

“Okay,” he says. “I’ll walk you.”

“You don’t have to,” you begin.

“I want to. Besides, it would kind of feel weird not to after so long.”

You nod along. “Right.” 

He ducks his chin in affirmation, picking up his stuff too. Furtively, he lightens your own load.

You notice but know better than point it out and argue, remembering how you ended up bedrudgingly carrying only a pen last time.

“Does Sam still have your car?” you ask as you leave the library.

“Yup. One more week, he says.”

“Do you believe him?”

“Well, he’s been saying that for two, so…”

You laugh, staring up at a big tree vignetted orange.

Bucky nudges you lightly as you begin to drift away, preventing you from walking into the street. He guides you past a fissure in the sidewalk as you gasp at something in a boutique’s window. “There’s a sale at the bookstore!”

“Wanna go tomorrow?” Bucky asks.

You nod. “Can we?”

“Sure, we’ll just leave the library a little earlier,” Bucky suggests, balancing the books in his arms.

“Someone’s sure of themselves,” you tease. “You’re walking me home tomorrow, too?”

“Of course. I have been for months,” Bucky points out with a shrug.

Your jests die on your tongue as you realize he’s right, the discovery shocking when the memories of your solitary walks are further away than you had thought; suddenly, you remember that the dog you’d pointed out two weeks ago was more for his benefit than yours.

“Weeks,” you argue weakly, throat suddenly dry.

“Weeks could definitely be months,” Bucky reasons. 

You ignore him, stopping in your tracks. “Why?”

A frown tugs at his lips as he pauses as well. “Because weeks add up to months?”

“Why have you been walking me home every day for months?”

“‘Thought it was weeks?”

“Bucky,” you say, a little urgent.

He shrugs boyishly, near flippant but your things in his arms don’t let you believe that. “I don't want you to walk alone.” Then, “I wanted to make sure you got home safe.”

Shocked pupils dart around wildly and it’s difficult to swallow before you steady yourself, clearing your throat. Your features are pinched in a sort of raw determination—open, honest. “Thank you.”

He smiles and it’s soft as he shrugs lightly, nearly nonchalant.

Before you let yourself get too caught up in the curve of his lips and realize you’ve imitated it unconsciously, you look away, clearing your throat in relief when you spot your door.

“Right. Um, thanks again.” You take your things from him before he can think twice about it, speed walking to your door.

“Wait—” he stammers out, confused and too late when you give him a wave and a quick goodbye before slamming the door shut.

You swallow hard on the other side of the door, wide eyes staring aimlessly into the darkness. In the dreaded stillness, you can feel the heat that creeps up your neck and floods stickily into your face, the prickling static that needles into your palms. Shakily and illicitly, a hand drifts up to your chest, pressing to feel the thundering beating of your heart.

You curse to the silence, letting your eyes flutter shut in candied disappointment.

-

Bucky thinks you’re acting weird.

No—he’s sure you’re acting weird.

He knows you now, can recognize the sarcastic lines of your cheeks when you wrinkle your nose and poke fun at him. He’s memorized the genuine curve of your lips when he’s said something so cheesy it circles around to sweet. He knows you at your angry and at your happy, but he doesn’t know this.

You’re being nice to him. Sticky nice. Not you-nice.

He tries teasing first, poking a pencil into the flesh of your arm and asking if you’d fallen in love or something. You’d scoffed, blinked fast, and swatted him away. But you didn’t say no.

He’s aware he’s a fool to think so large of a lack of something, but he can’t pretend like it doesn’t inspire something in him, something like hope, like nectar, sticky in his throat.

He wonders if it clogs words up in yours—if it’s the reason you’re so quiet.

You stare through your computer, steam from your tea disappearing into the air as you blink. There’s a sweet indent in between your eyebrows, similar to the one you get when you study something you don’t completely understand, usually accompanied by the nail of your thumb between your teeth. But this one is lighter, more unintentional. You’re struggling with something but he can’t figure out what.

Your eyes flicker up to his, glinting in the light when you catch them on you.

“What?” you blurt. It’s louder than you intend, and you purse your lips in that embarrassed way that you do, shrinking down into your seat. “Why are you staring at me?”

“You’re pretty,” he says honestly.

He waits for your usual flustered reaction and you give it to him, but it’s vignetted with something, different in the quick blinks of your eyes and the thumb you brush over your nose. 

“I'm hungry,” you complain, ignoring his compliment.

“I'll buy you something,” Bucky responds immediately, already pulling out his wallet.

“You don’t have to,” you remind. “I wasn’t asking, I was just—”

“I know, it’s fine,” Bucky insists.

“I can pay. It’s my food.”

“It’s just a meal.” He squints at you. “You never pass up a chance of food on me.” He presses the back of his palm against your forehead and leans in closer. “Are you feeling okay?”

You heat up beneath his touch, shaking him off with a scowl. “You make me sound awful. Fine. Buy me my food then.”

Bucky raises his hands in surrender, wallet between his index and middle finger rising with his shoulders. “I will.” He squeezes your shoulder before he walks away, dipping down to your ear to whisper, “And you’re not awful.”

You huff, pinching your lips together as you watch him get in line, nudging his fingers into his wallet to take out money.

Arbitrarily, you’re annoyed. Bucky Barnes is infuriating, with his long charcoal lashes and lilting chuckle and nonchalance in giving things you want without your asking.

Your laptop screen darkens with your lack of attention, and you’re left staring at yourself, scrutinizing the thin lines around your eyes as you squint. You’re being ridiculous; you can’t be angry over Bucky being a sweet guy.

“They musta’ known you were coming,” Bucky whistles, balancing a bowl and a small bag already darkened with grease spots in his arms. You take the bowl from him, warmth seeping into your fingertips.

You furrow your brows at him when you pop the lid off, barely realizing you’d never told him what to get. “You got me cavatappi pasta,” you realize. You look upset.

“Yeah?”

Distressed, you snatch the bag from him, shoving your fingers inside to pull out two large chocolate chip cookies. “And chocolate chip cookies.” Your voice rises and falls with a slightly unhinged twinge, features pulling as you examine what Bucky got for you. Your comfort food; the token you’d never explained to him.

“Yeah. It’s what you always get. And I know you always want two cookies but only get one because you’re afraid you won’t finish it, but we can split it or you can save it, or—what are you doing?”

You sweep everything into your arms, holding the food tightly behind your books.

“I have to go.”

“What? We just got here.”

“I have an appointment.”

“For what?”

“For—things—it’s—” you huff. “I have to go.”

“Are you sure you don’t need a ride? I have my car back, you know,” Bucky offers, already beginning to get up, but you shake your head, his actions hitting something in your chest.

“I'll be fine, thanks for the…” you exhale sharply. “I'll see you later.”

You run off, ignoring his confused call of your name as you slam the door behind you.

Hot soup dribbles down your fingers as you speed walk back home, but you barely notice, struggling to remember why you’d rejected him before.

“I hate him,” you mumble, fully dishonest as you struggle with your keys. “I hate him so much.”

“Hate who?” Bruce asks from the table, sparing you a glance from his computer. His eyebrows join as he takes you in, every panting and crazed inch of you, mouth parting and head tilting. “Uh.”

“Bucky,” you reply, setting the a la carte box down hastily. You drop the cookies next to it.

Bruce stares at you.

You make a big gesture with your hands toward it, pursing your lips. “He bought me that. Just—insisted. He's so—” you sigh frustratedly. “I didn't even—he bought me cookies.”

“Okay.” It's long and hesitant. “And that’s bad because…” he begins to shake his head. “You don’t like cookies?”

Your shoulders drop.

“You hate cookies and pasta. You think they’re awful,” Bruce tries.

“No! I love soup and cavatappi and—he’s ruining everything! He's such an idiot!” you rub your face, nuzzling your nose into the crevice between your joined hands.

Bruce examines you for another second before: “Oh.”

“What?” you snap, meeting amused brown. “What?”

“Nothing,” Bruce muses, but his lips are set in a careful smile, amusement poorly hidden. “Just that you finally learned his name.”

His thoughts are pathetically obvious in his tone, lips in a thin line and eyes crinkled.

“Don’t,” you warn. “Bruce Banner—”

“I didn't say anything.”

“Do not think what you’re thinking,” you demand. “He’s a player and a distraction and—”

“Okay.” Bruce has never been one to argue, but his one word answer makes you more frustrated than anything else he could’ve said.

You puff and gather your food, striding to your room with a glare at your best friend. 

-

For the first time since you met Bucky, you follow through on an excuse to miss the game. It’s not a majorly important one—although Bucky pouts when you tell him either way, insisting that he needs you there for good luck—but you still feel a strange ache at the bottom of your stomach when the game begins and you’re too far away to cheer for him.

The edges of your lips are downturned, brows pinched as you stare at your phone before you realize what you’re doing and snap your attention away.

Scoffing, you shake away thoughts about soccer and the memory of Bucky's sweet blue eyes when he’d teased you, a strange tone of real sadness beneath his playful jests.

You pause, lifting your hands from your computer to eye the time once again. Furtively scanning the work you’re nearly done with, you allow yourself the distraction and grab your phone, fingers dancing in anticipation when your lock screen is littered with icons of messaging apps.

You click Bucky’s name first, smiling softly as you read a quickly typed summary of the game he probably sent after the first half was over. He sounds hopeful and excited, like he always does when he talks abouts soccer, but he signs off with a mispelled reminder that he misses you and a red heart. You check Wanda and Bruce's messages next, your face falling when you learn the second half hadn’t gone as well.

Tugging your bottom lip between your teeth, you glance at your work again and then at the clock, taking a quick breath before you force yourself to write a quick conclusion you promise yourself you’ll revise when you get home.

The game is over by the time you arrive, easily finding a parking spot in the midst of everyone’s departure. You hear disappointed grumbling as you make your way inside the stadium and cringe, striding toward the locker room.

Your name in Bruce’s voice makes you pause, turning to meet his pulled, bushy eyebrows and pinched lips. “What’re you doing here?”

“I finished early,” you explain. “And you said the game wasn’t going great so I thought I'd come and make sure the team’s okay.”

Bruce's features morph into something like realization and then into his poor poker face, lips pursed so tightly they’re edged white. “Right. The team.”

“Uh huh.”

“Well, since it’s the whole team, I should let you know most of them are in the locker room moping, but Bucky wanted to leave early.” Bruce looks pointedly to the right.

“What? Why?”

Bruce shrugs. “I dunno. Maybe he said something about seeing you, but since you’re here for the team—”

“Shut up, Bruce.” You squint meanly at him, making him swallow a laugh as you spin around and continue on your path. 

You bump into Bucky when you turn a corner, familiar hands coming to rest on your arms distractedly before his eyes brighten in recognition. He says your name in surprise, shaking you gently as if to check that you’re real. His hair is damp from the quick shower he’d just taken, dark spots from water droplets around the collar of his gray shirt. He smells like soap and Bucky and it makes you a little dizzy.

“Hey, I heard about the game,” you say. “I wanted to check up on you.”

“Oh. I was just coming to see you. I told you that you were our lucky charm.” Bucky laughs but it’s not completely honest, his disappointment about the loss shining through.

You frown, unsure of what to do. Suddenly, you shove your hands into your coat pockets, pulling out a crinkled baggie in each one. “I brought you something.”

Bucky steps back, eyebrows furrowed as he notices what you’re holding. “Are those orange slices?”

Nervous now, you let your arms drop. “Yeah. I, uh—figured they’d maybe give you a boost and—” You cut yourself off, laughing awkwardly. “It was dumb.”

“My mom used to bring me orange slices after soccer practice,” Bucky mumbles.

You perk up. “Yeah. You told me about that and I thought maybe you’d like them.” The end of your sentence lilts like a question, answered by the quick movements of Bucky's fingers when he takes a baggie from you and pulls it open, taking a slice out to grin happily at it.

He dips his fingers in again and hands another to you, bumping his own small slice against yours. “Cheers.”

As soon as he bites into it, the juice from the fruit runs down his fingers, eyelids falling closed in a delighted hum. You barely realize the sap has streaked sticky orange down your arm, too.

He breathes out your name as he opens his eyes, a dazzling blue in the fluorescent lights of the locker room hall. “I forgot how…” He shakes his head, drifting off, and takes the other bag from you, pulling you to him. He sighs big and warm, rumbling through his chest.

You rub your nose against his sweatshirt, breathing in deeply. There's the fresh scent of citrus and then the lavender body wash you’d bought for him faint beneath his own distinct smell. He thanks you blithely, a lot lighter.

You shrug it off and force yourself to pull away, shivering at the loss even if you initiated it. “Do you want to get something to eat and watch that new episode of The Great British Bake-Off we missed last week?”

“Yeah,” Bucky agrees, hand drifting down to pull yours along. His skin is sticky and sweet against yours, orange juice smearing on your palm, but you can’t find it in you to care.

-

You feel sick when you step outside; a sticky, prickly rush that coats your throat in sap. It’s cold enough to make goosebumps rise on your skin, dark enough for the stars to drown in ink. Any appetite you had disappears, replaced with something clammier and painful, a twisting anxiety as a result of a bad day and a completely avoidable situation.

The bags with your food bump warmly against your knee, plastic handles pulling against the skin of your wrist. If you stay as you are, there will be indents of them once you finally put the bag down. 

Something like dumb, chest-puffed stubbornness tugs incessantly at you when you contemplate calling Bruce to come pick you up, a biting voice snapping pathetic for even thinking about it convincing you to shut the door behind you, locking away the choice of warmth and safety and shame.

It’s very silent when you begin to walk, the crinkling of your bag loud and in tandem with your steps. You let it slide down and hook on your fingers, carefully aware of shadows that might peek out behind yours and off-space footsteps.

Lonely fingers curl in on themselves, missing the comforting frigidity of the keys you’d forgotten at home. Your dying phone vibrates in the tight grip of your hand, spurring your steps faster. A dark lump appears on your shadow’s shoulder, and you freeze, spinning around violently to face the street, empty behind you.

You turn back around hesitantly, breath trembling. You could’ve sworn you felt someone else behind you.

Eyes rounded and wet, you begin to walk again, feeling an uncomfortable heat in the space where your ribs meet. Your required cognizance turns frantic, making your fingers shake and oxygen difficult to get into your lungs. There’s an echo to your footsteps. When you blink, there’s the ghost of an unforgiving hand on the back of your neck, the sharp slam of your jaw against brick. You gasp when you open your eyes again, a hand flying to the aching skin of your neck as you spin.

Your eyes promise that there’s no threat lurking behind darkness, but your mind blares with an assurance that there is. Ducking behind a wall, you scramble for your phone, cheeks cold with air-slapped tears as you press the call button for the first contact your fingers find.

Bucky’s voice is confused and comforting when he answers.

“I think—I think someone is following me,” you whimper, pulling your legs to your chest. Your food warms the side of your thigh. 

“What? Where are you?”

“I don’t know,” you cry. “I’m sorry, I should, it’s just—I was walking home from the restaurant and I heard something and I can’t concentrate, I can’t breathe—”

“Okay, it’s okay. Try to breathe, okay? Can you tell me what restaurant it was?”

You can picture the glowing sign, the faded wallpaper, the flowered curtains, but you can’t think, barrelling you deeper into panic. “I can’t remember—I—”

You can hear Bucky open his door. “Hey, it’s okay. Were you eating there or picking up to go?”

“To-go,” you answer tearfully, concentrating on the box pressing into your flesh.

“Okay. For you and Bruce or just you?”

“B-both of us.”

“You’re doing great, sweetheart. Try to take deep breaths, I think I—”

There’s a hollow click before it’s silent, the calm you’d been grasping at completely gone. “Bucky?” you plead. “Bucky?”

You pull your phone away from your ear, vision going blurry when you tap desperately at the screen and it doesn’t respond. Dead.

There’s a tremendous weight on your chest, your elbow knocking against the wall behind you with your attempts to draw in a breath. You shove your head in between your knees and try to remember Bucky’s voice, forget the cold fear that another clammy hand will reach for your hair and tug you up.

You need to get home. You can’t move.

You stifle your sobs with your leg, clawing at your shins and trying to think of anything else. You shove your hand in between your stomach and your legs, letting your phone fall to your thighs as the tips of your fingers reach the round hills of your collarbone. Your palm digs into your flesh until the beating of your heart pulses against your thumb, aching when you force it to stay put.

Thump, thump. “O-one,” you force, restraining your fingers from curling. Thump, thump. “Two.” A deep, shuddering breath that makes your mouth snap closed and your eyes flutter into darkness. Thump, thump. “Three…”

It’s how Bucky finds you, your nose deep between your knees, counting watery and muffled. He’s frantic when he sees you, panic like needles against his chest prickling to a pounding ache. He should be more cautious, stand still a few feet away for a few seconds, step slowly. If he were a little less in love, maybe he would; but he’s not, and the relief that you’re solid and no longer a tenuous voice on his phone is too much a relief.

He calls out your name and rushes forward, lowering himself down to his knees before he touches your arm. You flinch, shoving a strong hand against him, a horrible mix of anger and fear contorting your voice.

“It’s me. It’s Bucky.”

You still push yourself back against the wall, but your eyes finally meet his. “Bucky,” you test. “Bucky.”

It’s a silent, cold beat before you blink clearly, irises looking back a little less hazy. You murmur his name once more and promptly burst into tears, launching yourself into his chest. His arms wrap around you in tandem, pleasing the closeness your fisted fingers crave. He takes in your tears, steadily smoothing a hand over your back, desperation in the way he hooks his chin over the crown of your head.

“Are you okay?” he asks too soon.

You make a noise of which answer he can’t be sure of, so he gathers you up in his arms to push you away, only a little, only for a second to stare at you.

You grip at his shirt, cheeks shiny. And then, “I thought I was really gonna die this time.��� Hearing your admittance causes a shift on your face, still crumpled and unready to deal with this. “Just for a second and—” Your lips twist to keep words back. 

Bucky pulls you back in.

“Will you take me home?”

His compliance is wordless and patient, hooking a finger through your takeout and grasping your hand with his free one, guiding you to his car. He helps you inside, setting the bag at your feet before he buckles your seatbelt and pushes strands of hair away from your sticky face.

Your breathing steadies while he drives, concentrating on the cool puffs of air hitting your collarbone, the lingering warmth from the food you’re suddenly starving for. But the wash of panic has left a shameful residue and a subsequent otiose apology on your tongue, making the once comforting silence expectant.

Your chest weighs when you finally spot your door, fighting to pull words from your mouth at the dimmed lights, but Bucky beats you to it, clearing his throat without unlocking the door. His left hand lays clothed on his lap, face stormed with uncertainty, but there’s a resolute edge that makes him look at you.

“I’m sorry,” you start, misunderstanding.

“Why?”

You aren’t sure, only certain of how guilty you feel. “For… bothering you. For making you comfort me. I’m sorry that you had to see me like that."

“Don’t apologize.” He clenches his jaw. “I don’t want you to…”

He shoves his sleeve up, taking a deep breath as he pinches the fingertips of the glove. “I know that wasn’t something you were ready to share with me. I understand, I…”

His gaze is heavy, flickering between your face and the fingers peeling away his glove. He swallows hard when it’s pulled off completely, looking away from the sight of his skin.

You can’t help the way your eyes track down his arm. It’s scarred with angry raised lines, ending at his fingertips and disappearing into his shirt sleeve. 

“I was in a fire once,” he says. “‘Got some scars too.”

“Is that why you wear—” You trail off at his nod. “Why are you… why are you telling me?” you ask, wincing at how the question sounds, but Bucky seems to understand what you mean.

He shrugs. “I don’t know,” he lies.

You blink at him, slipping a sure hand into his and squeezing. “Thank you.”

His eyes stay startled on your interlocked fingers, stubborn even beneath his gaze. He laughs hollowly then, squeezing back before he finally meets your eyes. “You, too.”

-

Your fingers are wound tightly around Wanda’s arm, the nails digging into her sweater giving away what your face is trying to hide. You’re zeroed in on Bucky's figure as he runs across green after blurry white.

The energy from the others who cheer in the stands makes you buzz, a rush of confidence urging you to jump to your feet when Bucky passes the ball to Pietro and then has it once again, close enough to the other team’s goal to make you clench a hand in anticipation.

With the flesh of your thumb between your teeth, you can’t help but lose your breath when it looks like Bucky's going to try to make it, only for it to be knocked out from your lungs when he crashes to the ground from the impact of another player.

Your mouth parts in a surprised o, tongue playing his name before you can stop it.

It's eerily silent in the stadium for a second as Bucky lies on the field, before it disappears into a fold of angry screams.

You’re not worried.

Bucky has never gotten hurt on the field before—”I’m too good,” he had promised you with an uneven grin, annoying in the way that he’s right—and the only times it’s seemed otherwise have been lies, a mere play he put on for the free kick. He had shaken his head disappointedly at you when you’d gotten worried, condemning you for not trusting him. He’s playful when he’s flustered.

So you’re not worried, because you know Bucky is fine.

Except he hasn’t moved in a little while too long and you don’t think it’s ever taken him this long to fake it. Although, maybe it feels longer because you can’t take your eyes off his figure.

You’re not worried.

Your fingers say otherwise, thumb tapping against your alternating fingers so frantically they get jumbled together, clumsily bumping into the crevices between them.

“Is he hurt?” Wanda asks.

“No,” you say automatically, stretching your fingers out like a starfish as if to rid evidence of your anxiety. “No, he’s fine.”

It's another moment that seems too long and the lines of Wanda’s worried face deepen, breaths a little faster. “He's not… he’s not getting up.”

“He’s fine,” you insist. “He has to milk it.” Glancing up at the timer, you nod definitively. “Yes, he has to milk it to get the penalty kick.”

“What?” Wanda asks, meeting your eyes in confusion.

“The hit didn’t seem that bad,” you lie unsteadily. “He has to milk it. He’s fine.”

Your panic escapes in the highs of your voice, something translucent hiding it when you clear your throat. He's still not getting up and it makes your breath comes out quickly. “He has to be,” you admit.

Wanda’s brows furrow, eyes searching your face once Bucky finally limps weakly to his feet, giving the ref a short nod. A sigh large enough to make you bend slips past your lips, caught in a relieved laugh as you gesture to him.

“I told you,” you tell her.

“He’s limping,” she points out.

“It’s fake,” you assure, fingers digging round shadows into your temples. “He’s doing his hero face, he’s completely fine.” It comes out more relieved than you thought it would.

He gets his penalty kick, makes it, of course, and it’s another few, a lot slower minutes before the game is over, but you’re making your way down thirty seconds before, too much attention on the game rather than your footing on the stairs.

You stumble over your feet, barely caring when the whistle blows to indicate the game is over, and turn in the direction of the hall to the locker room. Your anxiety nearly seems silly now, not as oppressive now that the soaked towel you’d been waterboarded with was dry. Yet, it still prickles at your fingertips, faint but enough to ache.

It's only a couple minutes before you can hear the pattering of feet, the stress that the outliers are Bucky, limping like he did on that field, nudging at your mind. The players wave at you, surprised, and your heart grows heavier and heavier with each passing team shirt that does not have “BARNES” on the back.

Then he’s there, completely fine and near the end of the line. He's grinning at the apparent win, letting Steve shove him proudly. His eyes widen in surprise when they catch sight of your own, saying something to his teammates without looking at them as he steps toward you.

“Hey, what’re you—”

Unable to help yourself, you throw your arms around his neck, the prickling disappearing the moment you touch him. He is hot and solid in your arms, but most importantly completely fine.

“Hey,” he coos, hugging you back.

You allow him a moment before you pull back abruptly and smack his arm.

“Ow!” he complains, grabbing your hand.

“You asshole! What’s up with the drama?”

“What, did I scare you?” Bucky teases, smirk dropping when your deadpan doesn’t glitter with playfulness. “Doll?”

“You took your sweet time getting back up,” you continue, ignoring his words. “You’ve never taken that long.” You’re alone in the hall now, eyes frenetic over his figure.

He softens then, chin pulling closer to his neck so his eyes can give you a reassuring smile. “Hey,” he says softly, tapping your wrist with his index, “‘m fine.”

“I know,” you contend, but it comes out a little relieved at hearing it in his voice. “I told Wanda that.”

His cheeks apple at your statement, amusement twinkling back in his eyes. “Of course. My girl knows I can't get hurt.”

You scoff at the term of endearment, nervous energy dissolving. “I'm not your girl.”

“Not yet!” he proclaims.

You wrinkle your nose, stepping away from him. “You stink. Go shower.” You pat his shoulder as a goodbye, beginning to head back out.

“Sure know how to charm a guy,” he mumbles, watching you walk away with a dopey smile.

-

You’re in your room, laying on your stomach with your computer in front of you and a drink Bucky had bought for you sitting on your bedside table.

He's sitting against your bed, scanning over a document. You should be doing something like it, but you can’t help but be distracted. He's quiet for once, features set in something not playful and not serious, a small knot between his brows indicating his concentration.

He looks pretty. You can’t be blamed.

If he notices your gaze, he’s kind enough to not point it out, although it’s unlikely. It’s undoubtedly heavy.

He’s staring down at his hand when he speaks up for what seems like the first time since hes arrived. His fingers dance nervously before he shoves them away from his view, edges of thick tissue peeking out as a bracelet on his wrist. “Do I make you uncomfortable when I flirt?”

You blink owlishly at him, unsure how to answer. He sounds so serious, guilty. “No.”

“If it makes you uncomfortable, I'll stop.”

“I know you would. But it doesn’t. Is something wrong?”

Bucky cringes. “You don’t really flirt back. I just want to make sure it’s not because I make you uncomfortable.”

“You don’t! I just… don’t really flirt. I don’t really think there’s a point if I’m not dating.”

“You don’t date?” He’s known this. To a point, which he thinks is not completely accurate now that he hears the way you say it.

“No.”

“Not even guys you like?”

“Especially guys I like, ” you clarify, cringing with the difficulty of putting so many feelings into so insignificant words. “Things get messy. It’s just… distractions and it’s never worth it.”

“You think love isn’t worth it? That it’s a distraction?”

You shoot him a look, huffing a little disappointedly, as if you’d expected him to understand something and he didn’t. “Why do people always twist my words into something so cynical?

I didn’t say that. Not love. I never said love, I just—it never ends well. It’s always something you pour so much into and get so little back.”

Bukcy shifts. “That’s not true. A relationship is fair, or at least, it’s supposed to be.”

“Ah, but see, ‘supposed to be’ and ‘is’ are two different things. I’d rather just skip the entire thing.”

Bucky frowns. “I don’t think you should.”

“You don’t think I should?”

“I don’t… I’m not telling you what to do, but I really think you should try. Love can be really great. And you deserve that.”

Your nails pinch at your fingers. “But what if it isn’t?”

“Then it isn’t.” You move to rebut, but Bucky continues. “But what if it is?”

You refuse to answer, chewing on your bottom lip.

Bucky gazes at you, waiting for a response before he realizes he won’t get one. He doesn’t push, turning back to his work.

“Why do you care so much?” you ask.

He sucks in a breath before admitting, “Mainly because I think you would really enjoy being loved. And very partially because I’m selfish.”

You hum. “You’re a really good guy, Bucky.”

“I try.”

You scowl lightly. “Incorrigible. Annoying. But really good.”

Bucky laughs. “Don’t forget—what was it you said about me? Charming? Sweet? Hand-to-heart hilarious?”

You launch a pillow at his head. “Nuisance is what I should’ve said.”

“Mm, a little contradictory but what’s life without some juxtaposition? Maybe I’m a man of many talents.”

The tip of your index finger shoves into his arm.

You fall into a peaceful silence once again when the laughter dissolves, your fingers busy away at your keyboard. There's a moment where you’re thinking, staring intently just past your computer and Bucky is staring at you, a thoughtful expression on his face, stony and all.

“Will you?”

It takes you a second to realize he’s talking to you. “Will I what?”

“Give it a chance.”

You want a moment to ponder it, because you know the right answer but you aren’t sure if you want to pick it. “Give what a chance?” you play dumb, but he doesn’t buy it.

You look to your side, unfocused eyes lazy on an ugly painting.

“Yeah, maybe.” You want to tell him it depends who it is, that you have very strict rules mentioning annoying brunets with blue eyes who walk you home from the library and never shut up, but you don’t, eyes travelling back to him slowly. His silence when they finally meet his own tell you he knows anyway.

Quickly looking back down, you avoid his gaze and continue to work.

-

You melt into his side, delightfully prickling when you lean in a little closer to take a sip of your drink. Eyes shimmering in the lame lights of the bar, you’ve never looked so openly bright, hardly containing your delight and everything you can spilling past anyway.

There are enough people in the place for it to feel rightfully uncomfortable, sweat-sticky skin bumping into the arm he has around your chair and making the heat rise, but Bucky can’t seem to notice.

It would feel plain ignorant to do so—to not focus completely on the stitched pride in the dips of your smile or the warmth of your palms as they splay flat on his arm.

It’s not enough to just have your fingers tug at him during conversations with strangers, he feels he should imprint the feeling of your touch like a branding.

You say his name in conversation, cruelly dragging your hand down to bracelet around his wrist and squeezing. You make a little shimmy with your shoulders that can’t help but make him laugh. He zeroes in on your lips, trying to make sense of what you’re saying.

You’re cute. You’re too sweet to be in this stuffy bar with him.

You turn to him brightly in the midst of another exclamation and he feels himself transported.

He can feel the end buzzer vibrating up to his fingertips, the breeze on the heat of his skin when he’d looked up, eyes searching for you like a habit. 

Your features are shrunken into the memory, suddenly far away but still pulled into the biggest beam you could muster, hands clapping ecstatically.

“Bucky,” memory-you says liltingly, too clearly.

When he blinks, he’s back in the present, the tip of your index dimpling his bicep, your face close enough for him to count each individual eyelash. He grins without really thinking about it. “Bucky,” you repeat, a little harsher but still teasing.

“Yeah?” he responds finally.

“We’re complimenting you and you aren’t paying attention? Are you feeling okay?” you frown, lips downturned but the edges of your eyes still crinkled with happy lines. The back of your hand meets his forehead.

“Fantastic,” he says, his left hand vining up to hook around your fingers and lay them on his lap. “Just won a game, didn’t you hear? All by myself, too.”

You shake your head at him, turning back to who Bucky realizes is one of your friends. Carol, you’d said.

“See?” You say accusatorily. 

Carol grins. “Yeah. Kind of hard not to when you describe it so thoroughly.”

That catches Bucky’s fluttering attention, an eyebrow shooting up questioningly in your direction. Your lips part in betrayal at Carol, and you begin to take your hand back from Bucky, but he hooks your wrist before you can. 

“I think Maria is calling you,” you tell her. “You should go see what that’s about.”

“Now, now,” Bucky starts. “Actually, I think I want to know how thoroughly you talk about me, sweeheart.”

“That's my cue,” Carol laughs, dipping a beer at you both. “I'll see you guys later. Congrats on the game.”

She bounces to her feet and takes off, leaving the two of you alone. Bucky nudges a finger in between your ribs, making you jump and swat at him. “Hey!”

“You talk about me to your friends?”

You stare at him, bottom lip pushing out defensively in your tipsiness. “Well, the star football player is one of my best friends, shouldn’t I be allowed to brag?”

“Best friend, huh? Bruce gonna be jealous?”

You wave him off, making a small, stubborn sound. “He ought to get over it with how much he ditches me.”

“See, I would never.” Bucky presses his free hand to his heart in oath. “Star football players are very reliable. Scoring goals, keeping plans, etcetera.”

You grin at the reminder, something sparkling beneath your skin like static, jolting your fingers when it begins to brim. You splay an excited palm on his shoulder out of pure excitement, seeming to relive the night.

“I am so proud of you,” you say. Saccharine, words stout with a smile and pride. “You did so well today.”

You’re startlingly genuine, entirely proud. Bucky can’t bring himself to tease or flirt.

“Thank you.”

You smile prettily, the light in your irises shifting at his authenticity. “I am,” you insist.

You just want to tell him, for him to hear you and understand how much you mean it. Your pupils flicker to a spot above his shoulder, distant for a second as your face brightens more. You laugh disbelievingly.

“I don't know all that much about football but from what I do, you’re certifiably extraordinary.” You sound out the word, unwilling to mess it up when you mean it so much. You try again. “You made a really great play.”

“Impossible,” Bucky corrects completely unsubtly, but it’s soft, blurred by yellow light from above and buzz from you.

You observe him for a second. “I think you’re amazing,” you say thoughtfully, not in an effort to compliment but in a sort of realization. “What… type of person…” you start but don’t continue, tongue unable to keep up with everything running through your mind. The walks home, the paid lunches, the attention, the ability. 

You inhale sharply, as if realizing you’re drifting off and trying to pull yourself back in.

Bucky knows what you expect—what he expects of himself—but he can’t bring himself to tease you, reiterate your words with an artful curve of his lips. He can’t concentrate enough to ignore the prickly warmth at the bottom of his stomach. He glances down at his watch.

“Should we go?” he says instead, casual but urgent. “It's late.”

He stands before you can process his offer, still a little drunk from stolen sips but only enough to make contrasts lighter. You blink up at him from your seat for a second before nodding, two short, stressed lines between your brows. He shouldn’t have been so abrupt.

Kinder, he helps you from your seat and guides you toward the door, keeping you away from stray elbows with benevolent redirection.

Your breath curls visibly in the air when you step outside, white and dissolving until it is replaced by another, longer exhale. You wrap your arms around your torso.

“C'mon,” he urges, guiding you to his car. “Let’s get you warm.”

“Should you be driving?” you ask as he searches his pockets for the keys, standing at the car door, watching him. “And what about the others?”

“Didn’t drink,” he answers, patting his coat pockets until he finds what he’s looking for.

You frown, slowly running through the night and realizing he’s right, recalling the sparkling water dripping moisture next to his jacket sleeve. The cold and the ennui knock a lot into focus.

He clicks open the car. “And this’ll force ‘em to call an uber. Worst comes to worst, I’ll drop by later to force them home. I just want to get you home first. No drunk footballers to puke on your feet.”

He rounds around to meet you, opening the door, and waiting patiently.

“Why didn’t you drink?” you ask. You’ve seen him drink before, tipsy in that breezy way where he’s a little flirtier with a little less filter. “You won a game. If you ever deserved it, it’s now.”

“I had to be able to drive you back.” He shrugs, cocking his head in the direction of the open car door. “Speak of the devil,” he starts pointedly, reminding you of your frigidity.

Still contemplating, you climb inside with furrowed brows, following Bucky's figure as he shuts your door, jogs back to his side, and settles into the driver’s seat. Rubbing his hands together, he turns to look at you. 

“You okay?” he asks.

“Uh huh.”

He clicks his tongue. “Look at that. I think you’re a little drunker than I thought.”

“I am not,” you argue, looking down at yourself and seeing nothing wrong until Bucky reaches over to pull your seatbelt over you. “Oh.”

Bucky breathes out a little laugh, amused.

“I'm just…” You contemplate for a second, sinking into the rumbling of the engine when Bucky turns the car on. Immediately, heat slaps your nose. The glass meets your temple bitingly, jolting your sentence back on track. You turn to see Bucky's attention already on you. “Happy.”

“You’re happy?” Bucky repeats pleasantly, shifting the gear into drive.

“Yes. It was a good day today.” 

You feel clearer now, the edges of reality crisper as you look out the window. “I know I already said it, but I'm really proud, Bucky. You win games and ace tests and don’t celebrate with a drink to drive me home. You’re kind of great.”

“Yeah?” he murmurs, glancing at you.

You hum an affirmation, inhaling deeply. At some point, Your few-sip buzz dissipated into something different.

Sober, but influenced on the darkness of the sky and the roundness of the moon. It feels safe suddenly, a rush of energy jolting you straight. You stare at Bucky's profile. “Yeah,” you confirm clearly. “It's kind of disappointing, you know.”

Bucky is caught off guard, sparing you a look when he stops at a stoplight. “What?”

“I just thought you’d be different.”

“How?” His brows are furrowed.

You take a moment to ponder. “Not so… you. More of the unforgivably arrogant and ignorant jock variety.”

“So you were expecting me to be one of those cartoon stereotypes?” he teases, looking back at the road with an easier smile.

“Kind of,” you laugh. “But you’re not and that’s really great.”

The red light from outside drapes over his features, pulled as he searches the crevices of your face. In response, it slackens slowly, from thoughtful to a little dazed as you stare back. Without meaning to, you’re leaning in at the same time he is.

His skin flips green.

You fall away from him with a surprised exhale, blinking in confusion.

It takes a second for Bucky to look away after you have, and you consider yourself lucky there’s no one else on the road during the long moment it takes for his attention to switch back to driving.

He doesn’t want to just forget what happened. He doesn’t want to move on from this yet. “What does that mean?” he asks, your compliment playing on repeat in his mind.

You stay silent, trying to figure it out yourself. “I don't… I don’t know.”

He tries to remain unbothered, glancing at you once more to catch your focus unmovingly on him. He pulls into your driveway and turns off the car.

“What about going on a date with me?” he requests, a little more serious that usual but glazed in his usual tone. Unbuckling his seatbelt, he continues.  “I'll dress up in that shade of blue you think I look so good in and we’ll go out to eat at that little hole-in-the-wall restaurant I'm still impressed you found. You’ll order that same thing you always do, and we can talk about that novel you’re reading—”

He doesn’t wait for the answer you’ve given before, stepping out of the car and striding over to your side.

You gaze up at him when he opens your door, your buckle unclasped in your hand. He's kind as he always is as he helps you out, hands settling on your shoulders to steady you when you nearly trip over a ridge in the sidewalk.

“Or… or we could go take a walk around the park. Or go to the movies, or the amusement park, or do laundry or taxes or—anything as long as it’s with you.”

And maybe it’s the easy smile, with the glitter of gold pride still sewn into his lips, or the genuine kindness he’s never failed to show you under the mask of the moon. Maybe it’s the proximity. Maybe you just can’t help yourself anymore. You kiss him.

He’s frozen for a solid moment, thick enough for you to start doubting yourself, beginning to pull away when he finally reacts, practically melting into you as his hands frantically pull you closer.

He pulls away hesitantly, torturously, a second later, eyes scrutinizing. “Wait, wait, wait, are you drunk?”

You shake your head, laughing gently at the thumb that pulls gently at the skin beneath your eye to make sure, urgently tugging you back into the kiss when he’s satisfied.

“‘Had to make sure,” he mumbles against your lips. “This can’t happen when you aren’t you.”

“It’s me,” you promise, pulling back. Before you can delve into your mind too deeply, you nod suddenly. “Yeah, okay.”

“Yeah, okay what?” he repeats, chasing after you to kiss you a few more times.

“I'll go out with you.”

His smile drops, fingers tightening around your hips. “Wait, really?”

You nod. “Yeah.” You grasp his arms tightly. “I should at least try, right?”ey

[irritablepoe]

i saw ur post abt ur meds and i’m having the same trouble, so i hope i don't intrude (but if i do just tell me, i’m going to be alright w it ) but a little ‘hack’ i do is i set myself up to be like oh it's there might just take it anyway

by observing my ‘switch of places during the day’ which is just, bed, desk, water dispenser 😭 but what i do is,,,place the meds where i usually am close to the time where i need to take them!! ex.

i go to my desk @ 4am bc whatever entity thought it would be fucking funny to make me wake up in cold sweat @ 4 am nearly everyday, and i go straight to my desk to distract myself so i often place my meds the night before near my pen tablet or notebook so it's visible easily, and i get the welp it's there gotta yake it ig,,,

i go back to nap and catch a lil more sleep at around 6am and reach for my vape under my pillow to lull me so i put it next to the vape under my pillow and the might as well take it strikes again

i snack a lot towards the evening and have to take melatonin so i put it on top of my chips/cookie packet so when i reach for the snack it's there again!!

it doesn't always work but a lot of times it does so i just count on that hshshs

ALSO carry a water bottle / tumbler w u, or any drink pleasant to u (which i prefer more bc i will take my meds just to get another sip), so that u dont have to get water from a tap or dispenser each time to drink so there's less hindrances bc the tiniest hindrance also puts me off ad annoys me and i end up just ignoring the meds hshwhshhsha

PLS DONT BE OBLIGATED TO LIKE, TRY IM ONLY SHARINGSHHWHS bc it has helped me a lot of times!! it does take some preparation the night before but i jus think of it as scattering traps for myself HSUSHWHWH

ily!! be nice to urself!! <33333

hi hello, sorry this took so long to answer, i was out yesterday dfhskdhfhsd

i'm sorry you're having the same problem but i hope you can manage <3

the thing is with my meds that one of them i have to take when i haven't eaten yet (and i can't eat for half an hour) and the other one i have to eat afterwards to get it out of my mouth basically, so it's basically ideally this: med 1 (and med 3, but med 3 is allergy pills, that's not as important when i take it most of the time) -> half an hour of waiting -> med 2 -> eat. but i always eat after med 1 and it's sooo annoying when i realise oh shit i have to eat another thing now to take med 2 bc i have not gotten used to it yet hffhskjfhshd

i also had an organizer for meds but i'm too lazy to fill it up AND they changed the package of my important meds so it's less on one template (?) basically which makes it every 14 days instead of 25 days to refill it at my nightstand, which is also sometimes forget.

but yeah it's also the placement that is the problem and i actually put med 2 more in front of me now so i don't forget thank youu so much for being concerned about me and thank you for the idea <333 ily too and be kind to yourself today as well :3

[gogolstoelicker]

﹙>︿< ) ᶻz . . .

I love your writings sm!

Can I request Heartslabyul, Octavinelle, and Pomefiore with a yumeno kyūsaku! Reader/Mc?

Heartslabyul, Octavinelle and Pomefiore with a Yumeno Kyusaku! MC

warning(s): -

notes: MY CHILD YUMENO<33333 HAVE U SEEN YUMENO????? WELL NOW U HAVE<333

You're a twisted and sadistic individual. While you can play the part of a harmless, innocent child, you are quick to 180 into your darkest nature. You have an intense hatred for humanity, yourself and your ability that you've never asked for.

Your ability, Dogra Magra, is a mind control curse that curses your targets or 'receivers' by ravaging their consciousness with hallucinations, causing them to attack everyone in sight with no regard on whom they might be; allies or foes, friends or enemies. The 'receivers' are those that "hurt you".

Heartslabyul:

riddle went easy on you with the rules

u act pretty young and u look pretty young so there's no way riddle might not go easy on you

but he still teaches u about it

other than that, he would try his best so you won't be too influenced by those things you called as friends

cater always wants you on his magicam

he said you're just so cute that he couldn't resist

like u could do smth and he would go😍😍😍📸📸📸📸

he's that one parent that won't stop taking pics of their child and putting it in their social media

trey is probably the best at taking care of you

like hm? you're hungry? *whips out skills to make the best food*

you're sad? he's already comforting u with comfort food in his hands

someone made fun of you? excuse him while he goes to have a small talk with them🤗

ace and deuce are literally ur playmates

you always asked them to show u cool tricks with their magic

being nice a showoff, they did show u some cool tricks that quickly resorted to a competition that turns into a fight 🤗‼️

aww so sweet amirite🌹⁉️

you guys causes problems together every single day

riddle:

honestly? u probably tried to use ur ability when riddle overbloted

but thank god u got stopped‼️ who knows what would've happened if u have did that

Octavinelle:

oh sevens

azul and jade had a hard time seperating floyd from you

bc if he were to accidentally hurt you, you will surely use that ability of yours on him and that's no good at all

other than that, nothing much!

jade might be uh

uh a little like ur kin rn💀

HELPP I'M /J I SWEAR

or am i

well u probably kin them honestly

mostly floyd tho

u probably tried to make them show u cool tricks everytime

azul saw this as ANOTHER business opportunity🤗

he'll show u cool tricks but youll have to pay him‼️

almost put ur curse on him

thank god ace, deuce and grim saw what you were gonna do and stopped u before anything

speaking of which, u probably used it on the twins during the whole take the pic to win this contract thing

was not the best of experience, they had to go out, drag riddle to collar ur doll or smth

jade might be holding a little bit of grudge though

they'll happily be ur playmates if they're not busy with the lounge tho

Pomefiore:

rook is the one having the time of his life with you

he's walking in the hallways and then saw you and just

scoop you into his arms and walked around that way

he tries to find u in school every single day just so he can play with you

best playmate honestly

ok maybe not too much since you guys were seconds away from accidentally burning the school together for ur entertainment or smth

epel is kind of awkward with you but warms up eventually

would try to carry u to prove he's strong

yes epel, u just carried them, pls put thrm down now...

vil doesn't mind having u around much

maybe he'll play dress up with u here and there tho

like whats that in ur hands vil?🤨

oh, ur clothes^^ go change into this👹right👹now👹

he'll even happily do ur hair and put some accessories in them‼️

[allisonlol]

Hello there im not sure if you're still accepting requests but I was wondering if I could please have a fluff headcanon for Draken, Mikey,Baji giving their crush a piggy back ride? Thank you and have a great day 💖

a/n: of course, this is adorable <3

Draken

on this day in particular, you and draken met up after school so he could walk u home like he always does <3

except today you were more exhausted from school than usual

you tugged on draken's sleeve to get his attention and ask if he could carry you on his back

he just looks at you like 🤨??

plays it off like he doesn't want to (so you can't tell how badly he actually does want to)

you'd have to pester him and ask a million times LMAO

he says shit like "your legs work perfectly fine, so use them" but secretly was hoping you'd ask

eventually gives in and crouches down so u can jump up onto his back

you wrap your legs around his waist and rest your head on his shoulder

he prays that you can't hear how fast his heart is beating lmao

draken is a strong boy™️ so u don't have to worry about being dropped

you take this as an opportunity to tease him about his height too 😋

"damn...the view is nice from up here-"

looks back at you like “...😐” and threatens to drop you

doesn't mess around tho and gets you from Point A to Point B pretty quickly

...albeit a little slower than usual bc he's trying to enjoy the moment

draken will never admit it, but he loved having you that close to him and is secretly hoping you'll make a habit out of it

Mikey

i've mentioned this somewhere before but, i hc that mikey always randomly asks for you to ride on his back for literally no reason 😭

this evening, the two of you were walking to a restaurant together when, out of nowhere, mikey demands that you get on his back so he can carry you

you try to decline at first, but he's giving you sad puppy eyes and u can't say no 🤕

hesitantly you climb onto his back after he slightly crouches down for u

at first it's going well: mikey reassures you that he won't let you fall and proceeds to walk down the sidewalk in the direction of the restaurant

you offhandedly mention that you've gotten a bit cold from the temperature drop, and obviously mikey can't let that happen

so beyond this point, it's chaos 😟

STARTS FULL ON SPRINTING DOWN THE SIDEWALK

you cling onto his shoulders, yelling for him to "WAIT WAIT WAIT-"

which he doesn't do lol

you bury your face into his neck and just keep holding on for dear life

mikey feels his breath catch in his throat at this and that's finally when he slows back down to a walk

you've reached the outside of the restaurant by now...along with the stares of the other people on the sidewalk

your hair is tousled from the wind and u frantically try to fix it, feeling your face becoming flushed

"here, allow me." mikey gently brushes the hair from your face and tucks it behind your ear, quickly locking eyes with you

you look at each other in silence for a few seconds, before bursting out in laughter at what happened 💀

Baji

lmao he's the one asking YOU to carry him

falls on u like a dead weight, expecting you to catch him??

except he's pretty heavy and practically crushes you which makes it impossible

gets all "tired" after school and starts complaining about how he doesn't wanna walk home

he's just using that as an excuse to lean on you / rest his head on ur shoulder tho

on this day in particular, YOU were the tired one and decided to take a chance and ask him to carry you home

like draken, baji pretends to be all bothered but on the inside is ecstatic 🙄

lets you hop on his back and starts walking as your wrap your arms around his neck

would tease you a bit at first, like pretending he's gonna drop you or swing you into a wall 🤕

pls u can't tell if he's being serious or not so you tighten your arms around his neck until he's practically being strangled

"y/n, you trying to kill me or something??"

he's being lighthearted and you smack his shoulder, saying it's his fault in the first place

a yawn interrupts your sentence and baji just smiles to himself at how tired you are

stops teasing you now and maintains a regular walking pace

resting your head on his shoulder, it's not long until you close your eyes and begin to drift off

baji keeps walking but glances back at your cute sleeping face every now and then

almost walks into a telephone pole because he was so distracted 🧍🏻‍♀️

plot twist…he ended up taking you to HIS house instead of yours

[slttygeto]

oh my goodness congrats on 900!!!!!!!!! u deserve all of it bc ur writing is godly 😭🙏🙏 i’d love to know ur thoughts on the jjk boys as college heartthrobs/players!

thank you so much pls!!!! you're so nice :((

and omg the way the whole college heartthrob/player thingy fits them so well? i mean satosugu are the perfect example of a college heartthrob tbh but i will go over them one by one.

nsfw warning!!

gojo satoru

do i even have to say anything

he's got the looks, the playful persona and a good way with his words

the only difference between him and geto is that gojo actually does a lot of one night stands. he's also very much okay with the idea of threesomes and sneaking to a room in the middle of a party with someone to makeout or fuck

of course condoms are always present, between him and suguru he's the one who carries them around with him all the time lol (joey moment)

always has a drink in hand

is always next to suguru

literally like a pair of shoes

geto suguru

love of my life

he's the chill one obviously but he's definitely a big flirt too

it's not that people dont pay attention to him but hes definitely more reserved which explains why gojo is more popular in parties

like i said in gojo's part, he doesn't do one night stands

he does them from time to time, probably when he's stressed or is just extremely bored but other than that, he wants a friends with benefits or someone that he knows will be ready to fuck when he goes over to their house

will definitely makeout with someone or go down on them in parties, doesn't ask for much in return. just winks at them and asks them to keep it a secret. their dirty little secret

gojo and geto's charms are both very different.

gojo feels like a disco ball at a party, very bright and likes to make everyone dance and have fun

geto is like that first smoke after a stressful day

toji fushiguro

oh definitely the one who girls beg for his attention even for one second lol

honestly he's definitely into one night stands and i feel like he even almost knocked up a few women here and there because they begged him to cum inside 😭

hes always given off dilf vibes and that's why he attracts the ones with daddy issues wheeeew self call out

toji would be that one guy in the party who's gulping down whisky like it's water and a girl is suddenly on his lap just making out with him cause she thought it was so hot

though i definitely see him as that one dude who cannot tolerate bullshit at a party. if he sees a guy being mildly disturbing to a couple of girls there, he will kick his ass

definitely started a fight before. i said what i said

nanami kento

only shows up to these parties because gojo begged him to come

another guy who's on the lowkey, he does have sex but he's not obsessed with it

no one around college sees him because he's always in the library reading something

he is very much aware of the fact that people swoon over him but he doesn't really get the hype

shouldn't you focus on getting yourself an actual partner instead of going for someone who's not emotionally available? ouch that hurt 😭

oh oh he definitely drinks. the only time he destresses is when he drinks.

he doesn't like hookups but he will definitely fuck your brains out over the sink if he's in the mood

god i love this man so much

[bambuwu-writes]

Hi 🙋🏽‍♀️ your fics are actually amazing and they are such a big comfort for me!! Could you please do hcs of hisoka, taichi and muku with an s/o who is strong and picks them up at random times like they are just practicing and their s/o walks into the room and picks them up que everyone just looking and waiting for them to put him down like: 🕴🏽

Sorry for making this so specific please have a nice day and say safe!! :]

(if this makes you uncomfortable in anyway or your reqs are closed please delete this req!!)

THANK U THANKU THANKU SMMMM.....THIS,.,,REQ,..,.,SO CUTE,,,.,.EEIUGHGJ.,.,.[please pretend u dont see me digging around in my room to find my dumbbells again,.,.i have forsaken my workout routine.,.]

hisoka

ragdoll FR

he reeeally like being carried :”) he falls asleep sooo quickly when you’re holding him! he feels safe with you :)

he wiiillll go totally limp tho, he’s not even gonna try to make it easy on you

absolutely will try to convince izumi to let him go through with practice like this but she’s too worried about you getting tired so she kinda shuts it down after a few mins

she does think you two are really cute tho <333

she will audibly go ‘awwwweee’ if she sees you carrying him around the dorms

anyways! imo hisoka is totes the type to really like how his partner smells, so if you’re being all cuddly with him but gotta leave at some point, he will demand you give him your sweater or jacket or soooomething just so he can hold onto it while you’re gone

taichi

OKOKOK HE THINKS UR SO COOL….but this???? picking him up??? in front of everyone???

SWOONING….

ww.,,.www,., pleading eyes emoji

you make him feel so SPECIAL OMG… like he knooows banri is laughing at him a leetle bit [lightheartedly <3] but he does not CARE he feels like your SPECIAL BOY he feels CUTE and LITTLE

he will make sure to give u a big squeezy hug before you go! [or you could stay for practice >:OOOO! sakyo knows ur a good kid so he doesn't particularly mind]

after the first few times taichi will try and pick you up too!! he wants to be a cool boyfie!! if he cant manage it the first time, no worries! he’s on his way to tasuku to get advice on strength training 😌

muku

wAAAAAA :”D HES GONNA CRY….

dont be surprised if he picks you up too >:333 he’s a strong boy!

pleaadignnjvjf eyes emojinvjf part twoo,.,waaughf HE LIKES U SM,,,,

he’s actually totally squee-ing :”) full on baby mode activated

this is just like that one scene in that shoujo manga he’s been reading lately where the main character’s love interest picks them up because a pipe burst in their classroom and the floor was flooding and the love interest didnt want the mc’s shoes getting wet and they had a scene where they carried them outside and!!! and!!!

he’s so cute pls listen to him,..

kazunari Will whistle at you two just to see muku get all blushy and try to hide his face in your shoulder [feel free to make fun of him for being single, it will make yuki laugh for the entire practice]

[arcadejohn127-9]

Heyyy, I hope you’re doing ok! I love ur blog and I know we’re strangers who will possibly never meet but Recently, the little things have pushed me over the edge and close to an anxiety attack I presume but I’ve been using knitting and crochet to cope. It sounds weird Ik, but may u do the brothers and Undateables with an MC who does that and MC just ends up making so much stuff in one day that she gives it away to them. I’m so sorry if it’s weird, pls feel free to choose whether to do it or not but this blog has made me a little happier than before, thank you for reading and being here!

I actually use to do knitting, never finished anything and lost interest but it was really calming and fun. Couldn't keep my attention for long as it was very repetitive and got boring quickly but I always just genuinely enjoyed it despite that?

Stress knitting seems like the most wholesome way to handle anxiety and stress, it helps you focus on something else, you're being productive and having fun aswell as being safe! Though do be careful with the needles

And thank you for being here and supporting me, I'm glad I could make you feel even a little bit happier, a small amount of happiness is better than none! So thank you for making my night with how kind you are! Your habit and anxiety relief isn't weird at all, I don't see how it could be weird tbh

Sorry this took so long, I feel stupid now but I got really stumped on some of them on what to make but now I'm laughing at myself due to how obvious they were

Lucifer:

You made him mug holders and now it's all he uses

"It's very useful, I'll take extra care of it - no need to worry."

He can handle the heat but he must use what you've made

You even made a massive sweater and socks for Cerberus

How you got his dogs measurements is beyond him but it was the most prominent things he uses from your biggest pile

But he was no fool, he knew you

He knew your habits and how you've grown more anxious

He isn't always the most available person with his emotions and with his schedule

But he was always willing to listen to your issues

Mammon:

You made him a money pouch - how could he not be happy??!!

He loves jingling it to hear all his latest 'finds'

What was even better you made him a sweater he got to wear for his modeling job and show off to Everyone

That article was an interesting find

"CHECK IT! everyone loved your sweater! I say we can make a bussiness with this."

But when you come handing him a large bag full of your latest projects he can't help but raise a brow

He's greedy, he loves being showered in gifts

But he knew you, he took note on your emotional

He got pouty but he hugged your shoulders

Reminding you that you can always come to him and he'll make you feel better

Levithan:

You made him knitted wrist support, for his long gaming sessions

He wears them pretty much everyday at this point

Not only are they comfortable and helpful

But you made them! Specifically for him! For him to use! YOU MADE IT!

Has bragged to his gaming friends about it one too many times

"My player 2 is obviously better than yours, does yours knit cute things for you? I thought so."

Also you made him a crotchet plush of his favourite animal crossing chatacter, he prefers the Devildom version of the game but he's a sucker for bright cute things

Anything he could he'd either put in on his desk or on his figure cupboards

But when you come in with a massive pile, strained smile he felt himself panic

You both have anxiety, you were comrades in it! So of course he knew how knitting was part of your coping mechanism

He felt annoyed and worried on why you weren't coming to him but quickly calmed himself down, when he saw he patted your head

Explaining you can always come to him because you're in this together

He definitely stole a line or two from his latest favourite media

Satan:

Crotchet chair cat paw socks was his favourite out of the pile

"They're little paws..... I need these for all my furniture!"

His second favourite is the baggy sweater you knitted for him

He's going to cherish these gifts until he dies

Which could be never

Though even in death he'd be keeping what you've made him

Worried about the massive increase as he knows it's coping for your anxiety

He's read books about anxiety so he has a fair amount of knowledge on it

Insists you can always come to him when you're worried

Asmodeus:

He adored everything you made!

The sweater had little holes in them? He doesn't care and even smirks at the holes

"wanting to expose my beautiful skin~? I don't blame you."

Made a scarf? He'll wear that instead of his usual black one

Just knitted squares or unwearable things? Proudly shows off your work

Is concerned you've been so ridden with anxiety

He wants to help as much as he can, he has teas and bath scents for these kind of things

Just say the word and he'll bring all of it out

Beezlebub:

A crotchet layered burger he can take apart because it's velcro-ed together??!

It's like a real burger!

He tries not to bite or chew on it but it has happened before

Would feel awful if he accidentally ripped it

"I love it, are you going to make more?"

Didn't expect for you to actually make more

As time went on he learned that it helps you calm down from anxiety

So he especially didn't expect you to come in with a massive bag full of your latest creation's

He immediately got worried

You wanted to show them off to distract your mind but he just grabbed your head

Gently moving it so you looked at him

He told you he wants to help and he'll be there for you, no matter what and no matter when

Belphegor:

You made him w blanket - you know how young children are normally seen with baby blankets? Just always carrying them around

Yeah that's him

"You can't make me take it off Lucifer-! This is MY gift from (Y/N) and I'm going to make sure everyone sees it!"

Always showing off the blanket you made him by carrying it around or having it wrapped around him

He loves it! He also loves the pillow covers you made! It helps spice up his pillow collection

But you can't hide your anxiety from him, he goes out of his way to give people it

And soon he found out how kitting was a coping mechanism

He felt a little special you were making him things because it calmed you down but also worried about your mental health

The concern RISED when you were in the attic, placing and organising the big pile you had

He hugged you and flopped onto the bed

Telling you that he'll look after you and you can tell him what's wrong, stress naps are always welcomed with him

UNDATEABLES↓

Diavolo:

Didn't expect to find such a huge pile of new stuff in his room

He saw mug holders and mits

Horn warmers

And his favourite- a shawl with tassels, he immediately wrapped it around him and refused to take it off

He's going to wear this everywhere no matter his outfit

"Barbatos can be strict but I'll wear this no matter what, if I even see a spec of dirty on it I'll make sure to get it cleaned with delicate care."

But then it hit him, you become more active with your hobby when you become anxious

He immediately got to you, asking you if you're okay

He's ready to charge your whole class schedule if he has to

Barbatos:

You crocheted desserts and he never felt so much warmth and love in his heart

Almost collapsed from sweetness when he found a knitted pair of gloves in the big pile of your creation's

Appreciates the gifts alot

"these are marvelous, I look forward to see what else you make."

Brings you calming teas as a thank you, understanding your anxiety must be high

Offers a shoulder to cry on and happy to take time out of his schedule to listen to your worries

He asks you to teach him so he can make things like you

He wants to repay you for all the things you've given him

Solomon:

Has a whole room dedicated to everything you've ever made and given him

Whenever he has guests he likes to take them to check out your creations

"Come and admire my collection, My apprentice made these, aren't they neat?"

The potion sacks you've made are extremely useful

Aswell as the coldrain mat

Can sense your anxious energy in the newest creation's and gets concerned

He'll invite you over to talk about what's wrong

Let's you to take your time incase you're comfortable to talk

Simeon:

His favourite amongst the massive pile was a cute crotchet octopus

It was nicely stuffed and felt so nice to rest his head on

Others that peaked his fancy were the long wrist warmers you made, the way you made it made it look like lace

Aswell as a shawl and the very well made bag to store his books in

"You're so thoughtful, I'll treasure them all."

But he noticed just how worked up you've been and knew your anxious habits

Sat you down for tea to ask what how you're feeling and if could help

Also offers to be a guardian angel and make sure you don't get so anxious

If he can he'll wear an entire outfit made out of your knitting

Luke:

Is in awe how much you gave him

Almost died with Happiest when you knitted him a new hat

The crotchet wings you made just made him bounce with joy

He loves everything!!!

"I'm going to wear everything you've made and carry the little crochet puppy with me everywhere! I promise I'll take good care of him!"

Though will always check in on you

Once he's learned you do it more or only when you're really anxious he'll want to do everything he can to help

Has looked up guides on how to help people with their anxiety and panic attacks

He's going to be your guardian angel!